the last holiday I went on (in 2022) I got my period part way through the week and now I'm going away for four days next week and it aligns exactly with my period.... life is a curse existence is a prison etc etc
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An unexpected side effect of having spent years outsourcing my self esteem to people whose opinions I trust more than my own is that I am apparently now fully immune to the opinions of people I *don't* respect.
Unfortunately this means that when the coworker no one likes says mean things about me to another coworker, every single other person in the office is more upset about it than I am.
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fucked up that I'm 25 soon
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I do, in fact, hold the Jewish community collectively responsible for Zionists.
Individually? Of course not. Anti Zionist Jews exist as individuals. Many individuals are shut out of their own religious community, especially those of colour.
But as a community where Zionism is so socially and institutionally entrenched that the minority of dissenters are disowned and ostracized?
The global community of which only a handful of organisations openly advocate for Palestine, and even most of those paternalistic and co-opting Palestnian voices with liberal Zionist sympathies?
The western majority that institutionally benefits from white colonization and imperialism and silences its non-Jewish Black and brown critics?
The same majority that will never own their privilege or culpability or complicity in the colonial project before and after the Holocaust?
That helped the West exceptionalize it to cover up their exponentially larger and more enduring colonial crimes?
That distanced themselves from their white colonial privilege at the expense of BIPOC by insisting theirs was not a religious marginalization but a racial one, and continues to punish us for not treating them as racially oppressed?
Whose very demand to be automatically exonerated from the Palestinian genocide is reflective of their white and Western privilege?
That successfully broke the ties Jews of colour have to their own racial communities through Israeli ethnic cleansing and Zionist propaganda?
That uses JoC as shields, tokens and weapons against all the above charges?
The JoC that have purchased the privileges of Zionism and enfranchised themselves by betraying their own races?
The community that has used the charge of antisemitism to police Black and brown folks for decades, making it a knife against our necks?
I absolutely, 100% blame the global Jewish community.
The Global South will not forget. We will not forgive. All people with white skinned European descent are our oppressors. All people nourished on the teat of the imperial core are the foot soldiers of white supremacy, no matter what their race. We owe you no exoneration.
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Maybe this is my “I’m from New York so I didn’t choose to live here I was just already here” kicking in but can we actually learn to respect people’s privacy and acknowledge the fact that not everyone who lives in a major city is doing so because they want to be famous or the main character or an influencer or whatnot. I’m so sick of seeing tiktoks go viral that are just plainly stalking or doxxing random people who didn’t ask for attention or fame and are just living their lives. Especially given how many people in NYC are living with a wide variety of mental states, abilities, divergencies, and diversities treating them as a spectacle for your entertainment is deeply dehumanizing. Particularly in the past few years seeing so many content creators move here and gain their fame here it is becoming increasingly frustrating to feel like just existing in my home is not coherent with the burgeoning voyeurism culture that’s growing online. I, nor anyone who lives in a large city, should have to leave their homes every day worrying about the potential of being recorded and ridiculed online for just being a person.
People should be able to live their lives with the right to privacy. This isn’t to say that certain instances of internet activism shouldn’t have happened; for instance the Central Park bird watching incident (google it if you aren’t familiar but a woman was being racist towards a black man bird watching in central Park and his recording on the incident vindicated him). But instances like those are the exception and not the rule and many cases of publishing interpersonal conflicts/interactions is not from good faith activism or even from an activist point at all. Honestly what sparked this for me was that dumb tiktok that blew up of that girl looking for the person who kept writing “monke” on the whiteboard at her gym and the series of videos she made amassed more than 25 million views as she made a very public game out of trying to find the identity of this person. Some of her tactics included staking out at the gym waiting for this person or even asking the employees at the front desk who the person was. Maybe this person didn’t want to be a viral tiktok sensation and just wanted to write something goofy on the whiteboard at their local gym. Instead, this person has millions of strangers online seeking them out using unethical/invasive methods. All over someone who just wanted to write “monke.” Can we not just be a little silly in public without being at risk of it being the next internet sensation? If you live in a busy metropolitan area is it now your responsibility to make yourself as invisible as you can every time you step outside your front door? I genuinely leave for work each day wondering if I’ve maybe picked the wrong outfit, makeup, or maybe there’s an embarrassing stain or issue with my appearance that someone is going to see, record, and share online. I’ve even now seen TikTok’s of people recording through peoples windows commenting on how they’re living in their private lives now as well (the video in question is of a young woman recording a couple dancing through their apartment window). Even the guy who goes around “turning average people into models” initiates these videos by first taking non-consented photos of strangers on the street. Invasion is not flattery as much as people on the internet might like to think it is.
It is deeply unfair to ask human beings to live their lives in an unending panopticon. We should be able to go outside, make a joke, leave a silly note, have a bad day, an embarrassing moment, an emotional outburst, leave the curtains open with the knowledge that these moments belong to ourselves and are not suddenly (and without our consent) just become something for the masses to consume. Small spats that should remain small spats become global debates, a conventionally attractive or unattractive person becomes the internet’s object of desire or disgust. Let people exist. Let them have their dignity.
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