i know everyone is really mad at kotoko, but i’ve been thinking a bit about why she ended up like this
I have a friend who has a really similar mindset to kotoko, so i'm kinda familiarized with how it works. as i've said before, she really sees everything in black and white, and while she originally said she would forgive those who did the same as her (basically amane, and fuuta to some extent), after her t1 inno verdict, her ideals got reinforced, well, more like radicalized and pushed them a step further, losing her original self/mindset in the process
every time i talk to this friend about kotoko, they really do see themselves in kotoko, and with everything currently going on (and them going to therapy and trying to be a better person, and just getting bad looks from others when they talk) has made them notice how some stuff isn't that good or how it's frowned upon. my friend has a black and white sense of justice, and when i told them about how kotoko would’ve harm amane, they went “it's good to know she wouldn't spare the child” (i know, messed up). their context to that is, we all know how children can be some of the most horrible people in earth, innocence can be seen as beautiful, but it can also be terrifying. their argument is that when children commit a crime, they're not trial respectively to what they committed, a child who killed someone doesn't get the same repercussions as an adult who killed someone.
having said that, that mindset comes from a place of black and white morals, of difficulties during childhood, of seeing how people arent brought to justice and of how one suffers so much but no one cares. this friend struggles with empathy and struggles to understand others in general. the main difference they have with kotoko is that they try, that they were put in situations where they had to face reality and other people
i believe kotoko must’ve went through something that in the end pushed her to this belief system. “it doesnt excuse what she did” i know, but i still think if she have had someone to guide her towards the right path, someone who she actually connected with and showed her why her actions and beliefs were harmful, this wouldn't have ended like this…
now here, im not asking people to forgive her, i actually think that a guilty verdict this trial would be really good for her and hopefully would force her to face reality in some way
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A future fic carcass I'll write when I write (after I finish 9 ungoing fics)
King Viserys dies at the wedding celebration of his daughter, Crown Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen.
No one else does.
I am a firm believer Otto and Viserys are the rot on the face of the House of the Dragon and without these two everything would be fine-ish.
Unfortunately, we need Vissy T for his kids to be born, so Viserys dies soon after Aemond is conceived. Sorry, Daeron, not this time.
Joffrey doesn't die because he doesn't manage to provoke Criston before the king dies.
Rhaenyra overrules his father's decision and marries Harwin Strong.
Their son Jacaerys Targaryen is the heir to the throne, Lucerys Targaryen is the heir to Harrenhal.
Daemon marries Laena and lives at Dragonstone (Rhaenyra grants him that), their firstborn is the heir of Driftmark.
Laenor joins the Queensguard and is sent to Dragonstone to protect Prince Daemon (ha) and his future heirs.
Criston Cole becomes the Commander of City Watch while still retaining his white cloak (what? He did it in canon, can do it here).
Rhaenyra removes Tyland Lannister as the master of ships and appoints Corlys Velaryon (back).
When Baela and Rhaena are born, it is decided to betroth Prince Aegon and Lady Baela, making him future lord-consort of Driftmark (and successfully removing him out of succession of the iron throne).
When Jace is born, his and Helaena's betrothal is announced.
Baelon is born without an issue and the royal family meets at the celebration on Dragonstone, where Aemond claims Cannibal and loses an eye in the process.
(Kinslayer, everyone. It fits).
Afterwards Luke is sent as a ward to Harrenhal with his father. A huge ass scene ensures there Luke clings to Aemond and refuses to go.
Aegon makes a greasy comment and gets punched.
Both Aegon and Baela are sent as wards to Driftmark.
Lucerys still leaves.
Harrenhal doesn't burn bc even if Larys kills Harwin and Luke, there's still Lyonel and Joffrey in the equation. Lyonel keeps serving Queen Rhaenyra as her Hand.
Years later the royal family meets at the wedding celebration of Baela and Aegon, where Luke and Aemond behave very much like Rhaenyra and Daemon at Rhaenyra's not happened wedding.
Rhaenyra and Alicent clutch at their pearls, Rhaenyra suggests father died because of seeing something like that.
Daemon asks if she implies they killed Viserys, then asks where is Baelon.
Laena replies Baelon is playing knights with Joffrey.
Rhaenyra and Harwin Strong (no) have three more children, Aegon, Viserys and Visenya, all silver-haired like their mother (her uncle).
Laena is fine with it, they have a poly. Laena doesn't have more children because Baelon's birth was a ghasty one.
Baelon claims the Grey Ghost.
Otto is never called back to the capital because (suprise!) Rhaenyra didn't rush to kill her 3 y.o brother or the other one who was born after Viserys' death. Instead she marries Aegon off so he's no threat.
Aemond eventually joins the Queensguard and is appointed to the future lord of Harenhall.
Lucerys refuses to marry and appoints his brother Viserys as his heir, who marries Visenya. They have a very good life in Harrenhal.
The reason Luke skips over Joffrey is because Joffrey is always at the sea (with Baelon), and Aegon the Younger is bethrothed to Baela and Aegon the Elder' firstborn, Laena.
Everyone lives happily ever after, Otto gets to be the head of the house Hightower after he successfully plots against his own kin, since his blood is secured on the throne, if in unconventional for him way.
He once tried to manipulate Aegon, but was cut off sharply by Rhaenys and Corlys, who kind of adopted the boy as theirs.
Aegon enjoys wandering about Essos very much, he, of course, whores around, but he and Baela have an agreement. One of Baela's children is born from Alyn of Hull, but no one is any wiser, since everyone just thinks the child looks like her.
Jacaerys and Helaena have three kids, Jaehaerys and Jaehaera and then Maelor.
Jaehaera is oldest and so is the heir.
Oh, and Rhaena is happily married to Corwyn Cobray. They have a daughter, Rhaenys.
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Bro, we need more Dalex and Darkrai moments, like, YESTERDAY
In which the runaway god receives his very first gift.
~~~
"Kurai! I'm back!"
The excited voice and hurried footsteps made Darkrai turn his head away from the clouds he'd been watching for the last few hours. The little human, who called himself Dalex, was running up to him with an unusual glint in his eyes. A strange rattling could be heard, though the god couldn't tell how the boy was making such a sound.
Sitting up with a stretch, Darkrai acknowledged Dalex with a nod and leaned back against their 'special' tree. "So you are. How was 'camp' today, little human?"
"It was good! We learned about bug Pokémon today! The other kids were too scared to hold this really big Wurmple, but I wasn't!" Dalex puffed out his chest in pride, making his eldritch companion chuckle.
"Very brave of you, little human. Bugs are a common fear amongst mortals, from what I have gathered. Though, such a fear is not without reason."
"'Cause, uh..." Dalex kicked his foot as he tried to remember the camp counselor's words, "'Cause Wurmple knows Poison Sting, right?"
"That's one reason, yes."
Dalex hummed, then shrugged, "But that Wurmple wasn't scary! She was really nice! She let me pet her and walk around with her and even sat on my head for a while!" The boy giggled to himself and bounced in place, the rattling sound hitting Darkrai's ears once more.
Now the god's curiosity was piqued. "What was that?"
The boy stopped, the noise stopping along with him. He titlted his head, "Huh?"
"That sound. Were you collecting river rocks again, little human?" Mortals and their urge to collect shiny things... Darkrai doubted he would ever understand the appeal.
Dalex gasped, eyes widening. "Oh, right! I almost forgot!" The boy suddenly grinned, reaching into his pocket. "I have a surprise for you!"
Darkrai raised a brow. "A... surprise? What do you mean, little human?"
"I made you something! Hold out your hand!"
Darkrai blinked, unsure if he should humor the boy or not. Whatever it was, it rattled, was made by the child, and was most likely small enough to fit in his claws. He tried to create a mental list of what the 'surprise' could be, but said list was left empty.
...Well, if the little human made it, then surely it was harmless, right?
"...Alright, little human. Let's see this 'surprise.'" He held out a claw, which Dalex steadied with his free hand.
"Oh, and close your eyes real quick!"
What. "What."
"Please?" Dalex's eyes were pleading, with a small hint of nervousness. Was he afraid that Darkrai wouldn't like this 'surprise'...?
"...Alright." Darkrai sighed, closing his eyes.
He could hear the rattling once more, and felt a number of small, round objects wrap around his fingers. The things were pushed down to his wrist, briefly tugged upward as if testing for something, then let go.
What was...?
"Okay, open 'em!"
Beads.
A set of shiny, purple beads, strung together into a bracelet. The beads reminded him of gems, but the lack of any detectable essence made it clear to the god that they either lost their power long ago or, more likely, were fakes.
Regardless of the answer, seeing them filled Darkrai's chest with... something. He wasn't sure what it was. He was so stunned by the feeling, he couldn't look away from them if he tried.
"You... You made this for me, little human...?"
Dalex nodded, "Uh-huh! The grownups taught us how to make 'em!"
"I see... And what purpose do these beads serve?"
The boy giggled, "It's a friendship bracelet, Kurai! I wanted to make you one 'cause you're my friend! I got the prettiest beads I could!"
Friend. The word left the god speechless.
It was an absurd thought, really. The child had no idea what Darkrai was truly capable of, the terror he could and would always wreak on mortals at their most vulnerable, whether he wanted to or not. It was this fact that made Darkrai insist that Dalex never take a nap in his presence, lest the innocent child suffer.
By every stretch of the imagination, Dalex shouldn't have taken such a liking to the god, let alone offer him a gift.
And yet... he did anyway.
Darkrai recalled the Wurmple Dalex mentioned a few minutes ago. Unlike with Darkrai, the boy knew that the bug could've poisoned him at any moment, yet was still the only one amongst the children willing to reach out to the creature. He found the experience enjoyable, even, which was saying something given that humans his age were often terrified of such things. They were often terrified of a lot of things.
If... If he knew what Darkrai truly was... would he still...?
"D'ya like it, Kurai?"
Kurai nearly jumped, but managed to gather himself at the last minute. He looked up from the bracelet to Dalex, hoping his lack of a mouth didn't keep the boy from seeing his smile.
"It's... lovely, little human. Thank you."
~~~
Key Item — Friendship Bracelet
A bracelet made of shiny purple beads, symbolizing the friendship between you and your little human. It's the first gift you've ever received, and you vow to take care of it.
...Okay, I confess, from the moment I decided that Dal would mistakenly call Darkrai "Kurai," I knew, I knew that eventually I'd start calling the damn guy "Lord Kurai." Kinda like how the Nobles in Legends are called "Lord" or "Lady," basically.
Don't be surprised if I start doing that the next time we see him =w=
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i penciled out a polycule chart for mnmoms au last night instead of sleeping (because you know. priorities) so i decided to digitize and edit it while listening to today's episode. got a bit um. distracted from posting it XD but here it is now! a strange lil mix of hierarchical (samantha, ron, darryl, glenn) polyamory, non-hierarchical (mercedes, henry, carol) polyamory, and some guys who just happen to be there (morgan and jodie). because i do not believe in simple polycules, they do not exist.
this all happens like... a few years after the end of s1, i would say? except for the preexisting marriages, obviously, and also morgan and jodie's whole deal. that's been confusing since the trial and morgan refuses to clarify it for anyone including herself.
gonna transcribe all of the connections below the cut because i think that'll be too confusing in alt text and also, my handwriting isn't great so people might wanna read it in plain text anyways. this is gonna be. long. sorry LOL
okay so first: the key indicates romantic or platonic, though obviously, some of these connections are a mix of both (cough morgan cough). the heart symbol means that a relationship is prioritized, and if a character has several prioritized relationships, that means that they practice non-hierarchical polyamory :) yes, it could have been simpler to give them no hearts, but that's not as cute.
Samantha to Ron: Husband, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Samantha to Mercedes: Girlfriend, romantic.
Samantha to Carol: Girlfriend, romantic.
Ron to Samantha: Wife, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Mercedes to Henry: Husband, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Mercedes to Samantha: Girlfriend, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Mercedes to Carol: Girlfriend, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Henry to Mercedes: Wife, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Carol to Darryl: "??? coparents? queerplatonic?", platonic, prioritized relationship.
Carol to Samantha: Girlfriend, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Carol to Mercedes: Girlfriend, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Darryl to Carol: "Wife /p", platonic, prioritized relationship.
Darryl to Glenn: "Boyfriend?", romantic.
Morgan to Jodie: "Whatever these two got going on", platonic/romantic.
Morgan to Glenn: "Words cannot describe what is going on here.", romantic/platonic.
Glenn to Darryl: Lover, romantic, prioritized relationship.
Glenn to Morgan: "Darryl's hot friend", platonic/romantic.
Jodie to Morgan: Wife, romantic, prioritized relationship.
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Okay so Trent absolutely knows shorthand and writes most of his notes in it right?
I think he probably also has horrible handwriting, he writes to fast and it makes his words incomprehensible. He's also dramatic enough to modify the shorthand he knows to ensure nobody knows what he's writing.
My point to all of this is, imagine him forgetting his notebook somewhere and someone from Richmond finds it, maybe Jamie or Roy or Rebecca and they're like "neat let's see what he wrote about me" only to be hit by complete nonsense (to them). Even the bits where he actually wrote something out are just indecipherable scribbles.
I think this is hilarious, the idea has been amusing me all day and I wanted to share it
what's hilarious is we have the same braincell, i literally also was like "does trent NEED to have personalized shorthand that's some sort of elaborate code he knows by heart so that no one can read his notes even if they had time? no. does he? definitely. if confronted he would claim that it's for journalistic integrity reasons, but truthfully it kind of makes him feel like a spy and he likes it." also because while some of it is genuine notes, some of it is just like. stupid shit. grocery list of shit he forgot to get earlier. jotting down a terrible pun ted made or some detail about something ted likes ("taking notes on your crush is both normal and regular behavior so long as no one ever sees or finds about it" trent reminds himself repeatedly)
and it's so much funnier if he also just has terrible handwriting and needn't have bothered bc no one could read it anyway. (same, trent, my brain goes faster than my hands. one time my dad's doctor looked at my handwriting when i was like, ten, and was like "wow, and you're smart kid, too. you should be a doctor when you grow up" dlfkgjdh)
ANYWAY i love the idea of them actively trying to snoop and it's just. complete gibberish. especially if then they're just like frowning down at it and then pan to behind them and trents like "looking for something" slgkjdfg
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