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#fuckboy!taehyung
bangtanficsforyou · 5 months
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They Reject You (maknae line)-03
Pairing: maknae line x reader (fuckboi! Jimin x Reader, Co-worker Taehyung x Reader, Idol Jungkook x Reader)
Warnings: swear words here and there.
Word count: 20K (approx)
A/N: long long long asf! (There's author's note at the bottom too).
Park Jimin
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Jimin may have been very determined while pledging that he will make things right but right now, he's utterly confused and clueless. 
How exactly does he make things right?
If he were to go by the way movies suggest, he should be sending you chocolates and bouquets of flowers. But the question is, will that do? Will that be enough? Can hurting someone emotionally be fixed by something material?
He doesn't know.
Oh, that's another thing. In recent days, Jimin's mind has been throwing questions at him which he has no answers to. Which, needless to mention, has been frustrating him to no end.
He feels like there's a lot he needs to figure out before taking any action. Because lord knows he doesn't want to mess up again and given his history he has a habit of doing exactly that over and over again. 
The question that has been bugging him the most is; why does he even want to fix things with you? 
It's a question Jimin wholeheartedly avoids thinking about. Because he doesn't have an answer and thinking about this particular question makes him feel a little too uncomfortable.
However, to him, the question also feels like a big empty blank that he needs to fill in order to make sense of what he should do next. Almost as if, if he figures out this one thing, he will have all his answers. 
Which again, doesn't make sense to him. How can figuring out one thing give answers to the rest? But again, he should begin somewhere. Which obviously isn't going to be answering the big question.
Hence he does what he has been doing for the past few days; searching for ways to apologise on YouTube.
It's quite obvious that his YouTube searches haven't been very successful. But in his defence, it isn't Jimin's fault. It's YouTube's.
Almost every video that YouTube suggests as a response to his search, has this implication that the girl being apologised to, is the lover of the person seeking forgiveness.  
Huh? 
But that's so not the case. You're not his lover.
At some point, Jimin got so frustrated that he went on a mini rant to Taehyung, about how this is the 21st century and how a boy and girl need not always have a romantic relationship. And it's while he's ranting via text that he is hit by the brilliant idea of inviting Taehyung over. After all, if there's someone who's better than Jimin when it comes to the ladies, it's Taehyung. 
Half an hour later, Jimin couldn't rush to the door any faster when the bell rang. 
Taehyung greets the troubled boy with a scoff of disbelief. "Never seen you this excited over my arrival, ever."
Jimin is the least bit interested in paying attention to his best friend's teasing. "You gotta help me. It's already been three days and I haven't been able to figure anything out."
"It's about making up to that girl, right?" On receiving a nod from Jimin, Taehyung continues, "What was her name again?"
"Y/N."
"Right, Y/N," Taehyung makes a note to himself, having a hunch it's a name he will hear quite often. "So where exactly are you stuck?" 
Jimin leads his friend to the couch so that Taehyung can have a look at the screen. "Just look at the results. There are literally thousands of responses but not one that's of use. What's the point of having internet if it can't help you when you need?!"
Taehyung snickers. "Yeah, you did go on a half an hour rant about it via text."
Jimin huffs at the way Taehyung seems to not share the same level of frustration as him. But alas, maybe him being in a light mood is a good thing after all. That way Taehyung can think optimally and come up with a solution and then Jimin can finally have a good night's sleep. 
Gosh when Jimin thinks about it, it sends shivers down his spine. He really needs to sleep. 
"Great! You know all about it, so now get on with it," Jimin speaks with a firm nod of determination and turns his body ninety degrees so that he is entirely facing Taehyung. 
And then just keeps staring. 
Taehyung stares back for a second or two and then bursts out laughing. He laughs so hard, that his ears miss the questions Jimin throws his way, querying about the cause of his laughter. He laughs so hard, that he has to place a pillow against his stomach because it has started hurting. He laughs so hard that it takes him a total of five minutes to stop. 
When he does stop laughing, he utters a sentence that sends Jimin into a similar laughter fit. 
"You're so in love."
Or maybe wait. 
Jimin doesn't laugh. 
Jimin blinks at Taehyung blankly and then scoffs in annoyance. Taehyung can't be serious. "I can't believe you're in the mood of making jokes when I'm so stressed."
"Oh, I can assure you, I'm not joking," Taehyung shakes his head with a chuckle, denying Jimin's words. "You're definitely in love."
Jimin pauses. He doesn't like how sure Taehyung seems to be of his words. It makes Jimin realise that Taehyung isn't joking. Taehyung really thinks Jimin is in love. 
Huh. 
"Don't you think I'd know if I was in love?" 
Taehyung snorts. "Clearly not."
Now Jimin's curious. "What makes you so sure of your words?"
"Hmm, let's think for a moment," Taehyung responds, pretending to think deeply for a moment. "You have been worried sick, haven't been behaving like yourself and are throwing tantrums like a five-year-old kid. All because a girl hasn't been talking to you–"
"That could simply mean she's a very good friend to me," Jimin counters even before Taehyung can finish his sentence. 
"Well, you don't kiss your friends while drunk." 
Jimin shuts up at that, not because he agrees with Taehyung's statement but because he needs a moment to figure out what to reply to that. He needs to think of something that is a justifiable reason for why he had kissed you in his drunken state of mind. 
Unfortunately, the best he comes up with is; "I didn't know what I was doing. I was drunk. Plus, me kissing someone shouldn't be news, drunk or not." 
Taehyung nods. "Right, that's your thing. Kissing and sleeping around."
For the first time in his life, Jimin feels an odd sensation in his chest at the mention of his player lifestyle. He can't place why (another thing he can't figure out, yes) but for the first time he wishes these words were not used to describe him. But admittedly, that's who he is. It's only normal to describe him by who he is. 
Jimin keeps quiet as a sign of letting Taehyung know that he can go on. 
"But surprisingly enough, since Y/N has stopped talking to you, you haven't fooled around with anyone," Taehyung squints his eyes, looking like a detective who's trying to solve a complicated riddle. "Wonder why that might be." 
Jimin misses the sarcastic tone completely because he's taken aback by his friend's words. It's only now that he realises that he indeed, has not fooled around with anyone in the last week or so. 
It's true that he has been going to parties and have been getting drunk and have been doing what he usually does. Except for one thing, it seems. Hooking up. 
Oddly enough, the thought of hooking up with someone didn't even occur to him. It's not like he restrained himself or something. It's like he forgot that aspect of his life, entirely. 
What the fuck.
Taehyung silently watches the realisation play out on Jimin's face. It's entertaining, to say the least. His sweet fuckboy of a friend is in love and has zero clue about it. How sweet. 
He only hopes Jimin comes to his senses while this denial is still sweet and not when it's all bitter and sour. But looking at the way Jimin is struggling, one thing is for sure and that is, he isn't going to get his 'happy realisation' just yet. 
"Your bulb will take time to light up," Taehyung interrupts Jimin's thoughts, "Let me just help you with the apologising thing."
---------------------------------------------------------------
Jimin has been standing in front of your door for five minutes now. With a huge flower bouquet at that. Because according to Taehyung:
"It's not what you give that matters, it's the thought you put into it. It could be flowers, it could be chocolates–yes I know, at the end of the day they are mere materials. But what's wrong with that?
You've gotta start somewhere. What's important is that you show her that you have realised your mistake, you're sorry and that you'd never do something like that ever again. Sending gifts is not all. It might not earn you her forgiveness but it shows that you're trying and that's something." 
Hence, despite not considering sending gifts as an option at first, here Jimin is, doing exactly that. But then it's not like he could come up with a better idea himself and he thinks Taehyung is right, he should at least start somewhere. 
But he wanted to make it as meaningful as he could. Which is why he did a little research and showed up here himself. He needs to do just one last thing, press the calling bell. 
He sighs and tells himself that there's no point in delaying it, the sooner he does it, the better. Plus, it only means that he will be able to see you after another three-day stretch. 
The thought of seeing you again, does it for him. He presses the bell and with a bated breath, waits for you to open the door. 
Thankfully, he doesn't have to wait long. You swing the door open and Jimin is relieved that your reaction on seeing him is that of surprise and not that of disdain. He would have run in the opposite direction and would have been too ashamed to face you had that been the case. 
Despite not running away, Jimin seems to have lost his capability to talk, for all he does is stare at your face. It gets to the point where you have to be the one to ask him what he's doing at your doorstep. 
Jimin looks away as soon as he snaps out of it and remembers what he's here for. He still doesn't speak and just pushes the bouquet in his hands towards you and urges you to take it. 
It's not like you hadn't noticed the bouquet, it's unmissable really. It's this big, gorgeous arrangement of pink roses and the lighting of the hallway falls on the flowers in a way that makes it look like a portrait. When Jimin tries handing over the bouquet to you, you're once again taken by surprise and out of instinct you take hold of the bouquet without a second thought. 
The moment Jimin knows that you have the bouquet, he takes a few steps back, bows to you and takes off. 
Well, guess he did run away, after all. 
You don't even get the time to question him as to why the sudden flowers as you stand there for a moment until you're sure that Jimin isn't coming back. With a confused sigh, you head back into your apartment. 
"I should put them in water," you mumble to yourself and rest the bouquet on your centre table. 
However, it's at this very moment that your eyes land on a piece of paper that seems to have been folded with great care and has been kept in such a way that it isn't visible from the front but only from the top. 
With a small frown of curiosity, you take the paper out with your fingers. On unfolding, you find a small printed note on the left side and a handwritten note on the right. 
The left side of the note read: "Pink roses signify gratitude, admiration and appreciation." 
The right side of the note read: "You're not the stupid one, I am."
There's a brief moment where you are clueless and you have to think as to what Jimin could possibly mean. However, it doesn't take long for you to figure it out as you're hit with the memory of letting Jimin know how he has made you feel for a very, very long time. 
One particular line sticks out and you have a hunch that his note refers to that.
"I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn’t even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve.”
Huh. 
Is...Is Jimin apologising? 
No way. 
After that day you had thought Jimin would either just stop talking to you or would just show up a few days later as if nothing ever happened. Never had you considered that he would choose to apologise. But apparently, that's exactly what he has decided on. 
Wow. This is way more surprising than the sun rising in the west. 
You do not doubt that he must have taken the help of some of his friends but that's only fair. You can imagine how hard it must be for someone like Jimin to apologise to someone. 
You shake your head in amusement and bring a vase filled with water to place the flowers in. 
Honestly, you hadn't thought much about Jimin since that day. The way you felt lighter after saying what you had wanted to for a long time, was incredibly freeing. You were also proud of yourself for finally standing up and for sticking to your decision to cut him off. It made you wish you had done it sooner. 
But now that Jimin is apologising, in his own way, you are a tad bit surprised that it doesn't throw you into a mental debate. That you don't have to battle yourself on what to do. 
Things are pretty clear in your head. 
You forgive Jimin. 
You had forgiven him long before he even sent you the flowers. With your bottled-up emotions out of the way, it gave you the clarity you needed to see things for how they were. 
You had always had a weak spot for Jimin. Jimin, not so much. You were just another girl to him. But the thing with having weak spots is that they make you vulnerable. 
But Jimin is Jimin. He has no clue about these kind of things. Does he? For you, to expect Jimin to understand the sensitivity of the matter, was basically setting yourself up for disappointment from the get-go. 
It's the same as looking for a mango in a banyan tree. It's fruitless. 
That does not mean, that you blame yourself. When emotions that are beyond your control, get involved, the practical mind is forced to take a back seat. Romantic affection is for sure one such feeling where one tends to lose their thinking and decision-making capabilities. 
You forgive Jimin. You also forgive yourself. 
Does that mean you'd be okay with being friends with Jimin, again? No, you cannot bring yourself to do that. 
The trust and faith you had put in him has been broken and that's enough of a reason for you to move on. 
So what is Jimin to you, now? 
Someone you still have a weak spot for because it's not like you wake up one day and suddenly all your feelings you harboured for a person disappears. But you know you want to move on. You know you do not wish to go back to sharing the same dynamic with Jimin ever again. 
And this time your decision does not come from a place of hurt, anger or frustration. This time it comes from a place of clarity and acceptance, which is also why it doesn't seem difficult to follow through with your choice. 
Nevertheless, you do appreciate Jimin giving you flowers. Although, you think there was no need for it. 
For a brief moment, you contemplate if you should be texting a thank you to him but then decide otherwise when you remember that you have blocked him. Even if it's for the short span of two minutes to send a text, you don't think you're ready to unblock him just yet. 
For the time being you simply settle for putting the vase at the top of one of your drawers and taking good care of them. 
----------------------------------------------------------------
The next day it was a bouquet of white flowers with a note that read: 
I'm sorry; on the left and I know flowers won't earn me your forgiveness but I'm trying; on the right.
It once again was Jimin at your doorstep and once again, before you could say anything, he had decided his job was done as soon as the flowers were in your hands. 
You were too flabbergasted as you had thought that the whole giving you flowers thing was only a one-time thing. You didn't think Jimin would show up for a second time, just the day after, to give you another massive bouquet. 
Maybe you should have seen the same thing happening on the third day but somehow you didn't and were just as surprised, if not more, when Jimin showed up with another bouquet on the third day. 
Before you could say anything, Jimin was gone. 
Which is exactly why you now find yourself unblocking his contact. 
You: hey
You: just letting you know I appreciate the flowers but you do not need to send them anymore 
You: I forgive you
Jimin is on the phone with Taehyung getting an earful about his cowardness and running, when he receives your text.
"I'm telling you, this flower thing is not going to work. She hasn't even tried to talk to me" 
"From what I have heard you are the one who has never allowed her to even open her mouth and–"
"Hold on, someone texted me," Jimin interrupts Taehyung solely to avoid getting called out for the umpteenth time. However, his eyes almost fall out of his sockets when he sees that it's you. "Tae, Y/N texted me!"
Taehyung, too, is surprised to hear this. "What did she say?"
Jimin takes a deep breath, his nostrils flaring as he fills his lungs up with as much air as possible. "Right, I will open her messages." 
When he does read the words you have sent him, he is even more surprised. But even more so, he is relieved. Gosh, he feels like he could cry tears of joy. 
"She forgave me," Jimin speaks in a tone that is a little too loud for Taehyung's ears. 
However, Taehyung doesn't protest as his friend's words seem more important at the moment. "Are you serious? She did? What did she say?"
"She said that she appreciates the flowers and that I need not send them to her anymore and that she forgives me." 
Taehyung pauses for a moment and then grins brightly, the relieved and excited tone of his friend making him feel happy. "Then what are you doing fucker? Text her back, you idiot."
Jimin nods but then responds verbally when he remembers that Taehyung is over the phone and not with him in his room. "I'll text her back."
Saying so, he ends the call with Taehyung and starts typing. 
Jimin: Thank you
Wait. 
Thank you?
Should he say thank you? Is that the right response? But is sending a simple thank you good enough? 
He doesn't think so. 
Quickly deleting the typed words, he begins to think of a better response. 
If not thank you, then what? How about 'How have you been?' No, no, no. That sounds way too casual. 
He should send something that appears to be cool and that doesn't make things awkward. At the same time, he should text something that leaves room for a conversation. A proper one. 
Geez, texting is difficult. 
What if he tries teasing you like he did before everything happened? No, that would make it look like he never took the matter seriously. 
Should he...should he just be uncool and be honest for once? 
Should he just let you know that he feels like a bag of stones has been lifted off his chest and that he can breathe again? That he feels like he can think properly, again? 
That might be too much. 
But maybe he can just try letting you know that he's incredibly grateful for your forgiveness without sounding cheesy? Yeah, he can definitely do that. 
Jimin: Thank you.
Jimin: that word isn't enough but that's the best I have got 
Jimin: I am incredibly grateful and I promise I won't make you regret your choice. 
When you read his texts a few minutes later, you're rather surprised. Is Jimin saying these things? There's no way. 
But then you come to a conclusion that, there indeed is no way. Jimin must have made a friend of his type out these words. Now, that makes a whole lot of sense. 
You chuckle at the thought and react to his messages with a thumbs up and leave it at that. 
The moment Jimin sees you reacting to his messages, he types out another message, one that he has delicately crafted in his mind. Something light that hopefully will lead to a proper conversation.
Jimin: How have you been? 
Your phone pings and you notice Jimin's text. Something uncomfortable churns in your stomach at his words. Jimin most likely thinks things are back to normal and that you two will once again bicker and joke around in no time.
Guess, you need to break it to him. 
You: I've been fine 
You: but I would rather have us not go back to the way we were 
Jimin is already in the middle of forming another text that conveys that things won't be the same and that he'd do better but his heart literally breaks into pieces when he reads the next text. 
You: I don't think we should be in contact anymore 
You: it's a proven fact it doesn't do either of us any good 😂
You: especially me.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Jimin has decided to watch a movie. Not just any movie, the fault in our stars. Because he needs something to make him feel sad. Correction; he needs something that he is consciously aware of, to make him feel sad. 
It's much much more annoying when you get sad and heartbroken over something and yet you cannot explain why you feel that way. Imagine suddenly getting stabbed by invisible knives that you can't see but can only feel. Yeah, it feels the same. 
But who cares anyway? Jimin is watching a movie that will make him plenty sad and unlike you, it won't have him feeling like someone who hasn't been in touch with his emotions for ages. 
Taehyung munches on his popcorn slowly, his focus periodically shifting between Jimin and the TV screen. 
Taehyung knew something was up the moment Jimin texted him asking if he would like to watch The Fault in Our Stars. For the people who don't know, Jimin does not watch sad movies, like ever. Because irrespective of how much of a fuckboy he is, he is a huge softie on the inside (which is actually very cliche of him). But as his fuckboy-ness would have it, he absolutely hates crying. 
Taehyung does not believe that Jimin does not cry or that he tries to keep his tears at bay. Because from the few times that he has seen his friend crying, he knows that he isn't someone who's good at holding his tears back. So no, Jimin does cry and when he does, he cries like a baby. However, what Jimin ensures is that he does not cry in front of anyone.
But here's Jimin, crying in front of Taehyung. 
This boy is going to give me a headache, Taehyung thinks with a deep inhale as he once again shifts his focus from Jimin to the screen.
It must have been another fifteen minutes or so when he hears a small sniffle coming from his left. Huh, things haven't even turned that sad in the movie yet. 
Taehyung looks at his friend only to realise his suspicions are right when he notices his friend subtly wiping under his eyes. 
Taehyung takes hold of the remote and switches the TV off. 
He has had enough. 
Jimin looks at Taehyung with perplexed features but before he can ask a question, Taehyung is getting up from his seat to turn the lights on. 
This makes Jimin quickly grab a few tissues and wipe at the corner of his eyes. 
Taehyung rolls his eyes in annoyance. "Sometimes I can't tell if you're a drama queen or a little kid." 
Jimin looks at Taehyung with a clueless expression. As long as he pretends he has no clue what Taehyung is talking about, it should be good. 
Taehyung simply scoffs and shakes his head in defeat. "Do you want to talk about it or should I just leave?" 
This has Jimin facing away from Taehyung and he scowls at the centre table. "I have nothing to talk about."
"Cool then, I have some important work to do, I'll get going." 
"Sure do that. Leave me. Everyone does, why shouldn't you?"
Ah. Drama queen, it is. 
"So what Y/N left? Like did she leave you on seen or something? Is that why you're so sad and upset?" Taehyung guesses the possible cause of Jimin's state from his words. 
Jimin wishes it was that simple. He honestly would give anything for Taehyung's words to be right, for that being the cause of his sadness. But if only.
Taehyung deduces that things might not be that simple when Jimin does not give a verbal answer and appears to become more sulky. 
Taehyung makes his way to the couch and claims his previous seat next to Jimin. "What will you take to just tell me what went wrong? I know you're dying to let it out."
Jimin looks at his friend for a moment then suddenly reaches out to grab his phone from the table. He opens your texts and just places his phone in Taehyung's hands. 
With a small concentrated frown, he takes a look at the screen and goes through the chats. 
"So this is what has gotten you like this," he mumbles to himself.  "Have you tried talking to her and telling her that you won't be repeating the same things again?" 
Jimin shakes his head. "She never gave me the chance to do so."
Taehyung hums, deep in thought. "What do you want to do now?" 
"I don't think it matters."
"It does. Now tell me what do you want?"
Jimin looks up at the ceiling with blurry eyes. "I think I want us to go back to the way we were."
Taehyung, although wanting to, does not show the disbelief he feels at Jimin's words. He keeps his composure calm so that Jimin does not feel uncomfortable. "What you're saying is you want to go back to the way you would annoy her and she would put up with it?"
Jimin's spirit lifts just a little bit when he remembers how things were before and he finds himself absentmindedly nodding. 
"Which would also mean going back to the way you would keep sleeping around with people and then at the same time would make flirty comments towards Y/N?" 
The tiny little corner of his mouth that had lifted, once again turns into a scowl as Taehyung's words register in his brain. It's as if he's knocked into his senses. 
Noticing that Taehyung has successfully managed to grab Jimin's attention, he hopes he can only make Jimin see his point. "Honestly, Jimin have you ever realised where you went wrong? Or did you apologise to her solely because you thought that was what she wanted and that would have her back in your life?" 
Questions. Another set of questions. Jimin could honestly scream. But something about Taehyung's gaze makes him unable to run away from the queries like he has been doing all this time.
He considers Taehyung's words for a moment and then mumbles in a small voice, "I don't know."
Taehyung hums, having guessed that answer. 
"I just wanted to apologise to her because I know I have hurt her," Jimin keeps his tone soft and vulnerable. "I may not know all the ways in which I have hurt her but I know I should have respected her wishes and should have stopped flirting with her when she had asked."
"I may not know exactly how or why it affected her but I know it led her to be angry–" Jimin breaks off suddenly when a thought occurs to him and soon he looks even more ashamed, "–and they say all anger stems from hidden pain. If that's true then I must have caused her pain."
Taehyung releases a breath he didn't know he was holding. He wonders how his friend can be both stupid and smart at the same time and why exactly does his brain start working when the damage has already been done. 
"So you realise that you have caused her some sort of pain?" 
"I must have," Jimin agrees. 
"Have you then tried figuring out what exactly she means to you?" 
Jimin's tears have dried, thanks to the ongoing conversation that has distracted him enough to have the wheels of his brain running again.  
"She's someone I care about a lot and someone I want in my life." 
"As a friend?" Taehyung pushes. 
Jimin nods. 
Taehyung hums, "I think you really need to sit with yourself and think things through." 
—-------------------------------------------------------
Jimin is dumb and Taehyung is loyal.
Which is why the latter finds himself in the middle of a party, waiting for you to arrive. 
A week of Jimin moping and being a sullen child, had Taehyung take matters into his own hands. Jimin could not possibly figure things out by himself even if everyone around him could. Taehyung only hopes he will admit what has been brewing for a long time, when his feelings smack him right across the face. 
Taehyung leans against the bar counter, his eyes hardly moving from the entrance as he waits for you to walk through the door. 
It takes about another fifteen minutes of his eyes locked on the door, for you to finally emerge. 
Taehyung relaxes a breath. He had to do a lot of digging to find a common friend and for him to convince that common friend to somehow convince you to come to the party. He wasn't sure if all of this would work, but now that you're here, success is a step closer. 
He gives you five minutes to say your hi's and hello's and then, he's making his way to you. 
"And you must be Y/N?" 
You look at the guy who seems to know you by your name and frown when you don't recall ever having interacted with him. "And you must be?"
"Taehyung. Kim Taehyung."
Your brain clicks in realisation. Taehyung, a name you have heard Jimin mention many times. However, this is the first time that you get to put a face to the said name. 
"I have heard of you," you nod as a feeling of reluctance takes over you. Why is Taehyung approaching you? 
He smiles. "I'm not surprised by that."
You return his smile awkwardly and wonder what you should be saying next. "How do you know me?" 
"Let's just say I have heard of you as well," his smile turns into a full-blown grin as if he's enjoying this. 
"From Jimin?" 
"Ah yes. We both have an idiot named Jimin in our lives."
You feel your traitor heart get curious at the confirmation. Taehyung knows of you from Jimin? Jimin talked about you to his friends? The thought of that catches you with surprise as you never thought you were ever important enough to him, for him to do that. You thought you were just another girl who fell for him. However, your curiosity is soon overtaken by the thought of him making light and fun of your feelings.
"That idiot, however, speaks highly of you, which is why I just could not miss the opportunity to speak to you," Taehyung quips, sensing the thoughts inside your head. 
You look at Taehyung, wondering what to make of his words. You just find it difficult to believe that Jimin speaks highly of you. One speaks highly of the people they respect and well—no, you don't want your mind to wander there.
"So you're here speaking to me, to verify the things Jimin has said about me?" You keep your tone light, playful and teasing, so as to not come off as rude. While, on the inside, you're really confused as fuck as to what to make out of this. Does Taehyung not know of the recent changes in the dynamics between you and Jimin? 
"Oh no, absolutely not," he shakes his head. "I do not doubt a thing Jimin has said about you. I'm only here out of sheer curiosity and with the intent to get to know you better."
And some ulterior purposes. That part he leaves unspoken. 
You observe him for a moment and relax a little when you realise that he seems genuine. You don't know, why he's here and what he wants from you, but you decide talking to him won't be of any harm.
—---------------------------------------------------------
Jimin is grumpy as fuck when he walks in and is greeted by the loud music that blasts through the speakers. Goodness, why did he enjoy partying, again? 
He really wouldn't be here had it not been for Taehyung's constant nagging that he had something important to say, and that couldn't be done unless he attended the party. 
Technically, his words made zero sense. Taehyung couldn't just say whatever important thing he had to say, over the phone? Apparently, according to him, he couldn't. 
He prays to whatever god is out there, for the sake of Taehyung that he finds him soon. 
The universe, however, has other plans. 
Jimjn spots you before he spots Taehyung. He sees you smiling wide and even in the dimmed lights, he can see the way your eyes shine with amusement and joy. As selfish as it is, Jimin feels any amount of hope he might have had, leave at the sight. You're clearly doing fine without him. A part of him wishes you weren't. 
It feels eerily similar to the time when he had spotted you on his way to class. 
But then he realises you are with a guy. A strange emotion fills him, one that he believes he hasn't felt before, ever. He realises he's jealous. He's so jealous of the lucky bastard who's getting to make you laugh and with whom you seem so comfortable with. With that jealousy, comes a huge wave of insecurity. The guy doesn't seem to have messed up like Jimin did. He doesn't seem to be someone you feel the need to cut off your life. All of which Jimin has done and is. 
However, when the light falls on the face of the said guy, Jimin is hit with a sense of anger and confirmation that the said guy is much, much better than Jimin is. 
Taehyung is smart, has a good sense of humour and surely knows more when it comes to matters of the heart. Whereas, Jimin has only been confused and no matter how hard he has tried, he has been unsuccessful in clearing up the cloud of confusion. 
For a brief moment, he is taken back to the words Taehyung had said to him–you're so in love–which Jimin had found utterly ridiculous at the time. However, now that he finds himself in the hold of jealousy and a brewing insecurity that only you hold the power to put a stop to, he doesn't find the idea as absurd. 
He's never been in love before. But somehow he is still hit with the realisation that all his desperation, anger, jealousy and insecurities stem from one thing and one thing only. His love for you. 
He is hit with more and more clarity with each passing moment as he stares at you. An overwhelming urge to make you his, washes over him and with strong, determined steps, he walks in the direction where you chat with Taehyung. 
The moment the two of you realise Jimin's presence, your smile falters whereas Taehyung's widens.
"Jimin," you whisper, caught completely off guard. 
"Y/N," he greets you back. "I wasn't expecting to see you here."
"Me neither," you mumble in a small voice. 
"How have you been?" 
Neither of you miss the fact that this was the very same question he had asked via text, to which you had made it clear that things would never be the same, instead of actually answering him. 
However, now that you both stand in front of each other, you think it would be incredibly rude to not answer him. "I'm fine." 
Your short answer leaves no further room for conversation and it's only when you realise that Jimin refuses to avert his eyes from you, that you ask him back the same question. 
"I've been anything but fine," Jimin answers, without missing a beat. 
His answer is similar to yours in terms of being short and vague. However, his response means exactly the opposite of yours. 
You stifle the question that's on the tip of your tongue and push away the overgrowing concern at his answer. This is exactly why you had chosen to end whatever friendship you two had over text. You were unsure of the feelings Jimin would stir within you. Sure, you have made the choice of moving on from him but there was no denying that you haven't moved on yet. 
You nod and think it would be best to include Taehyung in the conversation. He would surely know how to break the tension. However, you realise at the same time as Jimin does that Taehyung has disappeared into thin air. 
Taehyung's gone, you think with surprise and disbelief, having no clue when he left. 
Taehyung's gone, Jimin thinks, beaming with glee and satisfaction. 
"Do you want a drink?" Jimin asks, having no intention of leaving. 
"I could actually do with some alcohol," you mumble mainly to yourself, but somehow despite the loud music, Jimin manages to hear you. The very next moment he has two drinks in his hands and gracefully offers you one.
"I have a few things to say," he says after a few sips.
Oh god. Please be kind to my heart. You stay quiet. You were not prepared to face Jimin. After texting him that day, you had honestly thought that was it. It was hard for you to send him those words. So incredibly hard. But you knew it was for the best.  
A part of you had wished for Jimin to regret losing you. But you knew that thought to be impractical. You knew in reality, Jimin must have slipped into someone's bed instead of giving you a second thought. You had honestly thought Jimin's attempt at apologising with flowers was merely a result of his hurt to the ego. Nevertheless, you appreciate his effort and know better than to have any further expectations from the man. 
However, this is incredibly confusing. More so, because the Jimin who was sending you those flowers would run away right after he knew that the flowers had reached their destination. However, this Jimin, stands in front of you with eyes locked with yours, refusing to back down. 
"I had sent those flowers to you, because I knew I had to apologise. I knew I messed up. I knew I hurt you. Don't get me wrong, the knowledge that I had hurt you was enough of a slap on my face, but I didn't know what it felt like for you," he takes a pause, "but now I do."
Jimin is aware that comparing what he has put you through with what he felt for merely a few minutes after seeing you with Taehyung, is completely unfair. However, it'd be fair to say he has got a taste of his own medicine and he fucking hates himself to have you put through that, over and over again. 
"I know now, because–," he takes a deep breath, afraid you won't believe him, "–I have come to the realisation that I'm in love with you."
Your pupils dilate in shock and after a brief moment, your expressions morph into that of disbelief, much like Jimin had expected. 
"I don't expect you to believe it. I know I haven't done much to earn your trust. All I ask is for you to give me a chance to prove myself."
You're too shocked to make coherent thoughts. As a matter of fact, the severity of Jimin's words doesn't click in your brain. How can it, when you have seen it for yourself how appalled Jimin feels at the thought of commitment? How can you digest the thought of Jimin saying these words, that too, to you? 
"What do you want, Jimin?" You ask wanting the interaction to be cut short, afraid that the longer you stay in his presence the more you will find yourself inclined to believe his words. 
"Let me take you out on a date." 
Kim Taehyung
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I'm in a relationship.
You absent-mindedly stare at the words on your screen as you feel the mix of emotions resurface yet again. 
Taehyung is in a relationship. The Taehyung you love so dearly, is in a relationship. And if you are to go with his status updates, he's quite happy about it as well. 
How do you feel about it, exactly? 
You feel betrayed, hurt, confused, angry, perplexed, sad, annoyed, embarrassed, lonely, frustrated, upset. These emotions are only a few to name. There's so much you think and believe, you still haven't figured out yet. Anytime, you try to focus on your emotions in hopes that you will be able to let it all out, all you come up with is an empty feeling. 
That's another thing. You haven't cried at all. But you want to. You want to just let all of it hit you at once and get it off your chest. Because the heavy uncomfortable feeling that often stirs your heart is not something you wish to deal with for long. 
Sometimes your mind comes up with all the little things and moments that had made Taehyung so special to you and you find yourself this close to breaking into uncontrollable sobs. But then it just never happens. It's like someone is pressing the accelerator and the brake at the same time and you're just there, frozen in time, not knowing what to do. 
You doubt if you have even fully grasped the concept of Taehyung being in a relationship. The thought that he's in one and you got to learn about it only after he committed, that too through a WhatsApp status, is completely unbelievable to you for some reason. No matter how much you try, a part of you doesn't want to believe it.
It's a whole set of emotions you never thought Taehyung would make you feel. He was your feel-good person, one of your best friends and someone you trusted with your entire heart. It's something you don't even know as to how to react to. 
"Y/N!"
You blink back to reality when someone shakes you by your shoulders. "Huh?" 
"You zoned out again."
"Oh," you speak in a tone of realisation, "I'm sorry–"
"Nothing to apologise for. Just forget whoever that guy is. He's surely not treating you right if you have this conflicted look on your face all the time."
If only it were that easy. You wish it was that easy. 
You chuckle at your next desk co-worker, Shanaya's, words. "I will surely contemplate on your words." 
"Men don't deserve shit from us if they treat us like shit," she nods seriously. "And with the way, you have had this sad-confused look in your eyes for a whole week now, I strongly doubt that man is any good for you."
Oh yeah, it's been a week.
Although, you could have been fooled by how the admittance of his relationship remains the last text exchanged between the two of you. You just didn't know how to respond to him at that time. You were too busy absorbing the shock to think of a proper response. 
You had just shut your net off and tried your hardest to fall asleep. But you just couldn't get a blink of sleep and since then you also couldn't bring yourself to pretend to be fine with him, when you were far from it.
Maybe you had posted your status a little too frequently to subtly let him know that you're online and well-active on your socials but are simply choosing to not talk to him. On the other side of the coin, is the fact that you feel disheartened that he hasn't made any effort to talk to you. It's the longest the both of you have gone without talking to each other. 
A hand waves in front of your face gaining your attention as your co-worker looks at you knowingly. 
"See! Not good for you."
You smile at her words and shake your head softly, amused by her straightforward and direct nature. 
—-----------
"How are you?"
You roll your eyes before replying. "I'm fine, I'm fine."
"Hmm," your best friend hums. "On a scale of 1 to 10?"
"Idk man, 7?"
"That's an improvement," she speaks to herself. "Now tell me, have you blocked Taehyung, yet?"
"I won't do that," you reply softly with a tone of surety. 
She sighs over the phone. "Babe, he's a dick. Why haven't you cut him off yet, is beyond me."
Your best friend is of the kind whom if you call crying, she'd ask you to first get rid of the person who's responsible for your tears and then she will allow you to tell her what went down for you to cry. If only she were in the same city as you, she'd have committed the crimes herself instead of having to beg you to do them. 
She's protective of you, incredibly so. 
When you had told her everything about Taehyung, she had muttered to herself something along the lines of how she knew he was gonna turn out to be a dickhead. You never queried her on that because in a way you knew what she meant. 
On learning about the situation you and Taehyung were in and about his unwillingness to be in a relationship, she was very firm about making her point that Taehyung was only making excuses. She was adamant that a person who really loves you wouldn't come up with reasons as to why they shouldn't be together. At the time, you had acknowledged what she was trying to say but you added that sometimes people get scared and fear often turns out to be an emotion that is rather difficult to overcome.
With much reassurance from your side that Taehyung was a great guy, she had let go of the topic. However, to say that Taehyung has now earned the entirety of your best friend's hatred, would be an understatement. You'd have been really concerned about his safety had she been in the city. 
"He–", you pause briefly, "–isn't a bad guy." 
Your friend scoffs. "Right. He's the worst."
"He is nice," you say a little more firmly. 
"Oh! Yes please, someone please give him a Nobel prize for his niceness!"
To your surprise the tone in which she speaks, makes you burst out laughing. "You really hate him, don't you?"
"Has he ever given me a reason to NOT despise him?" 
You chuckle as your laughter dies off. "Well, I don't blame you. I'd hate the guy as well if I was in your place."
"Hah! So you agree on something with me."
"But," you emphasise on the word, "he's not a bad guy. I don't know how everything turned out to be this way but trust me he has a very tender heart."
"I cannot believe you're making excuses for him, Y/N." 
Her surprisingly soft tone serves as a reminder that your best friend is probably one of the most compassionate and understanding people you've ever met. The only time you've seen her behave like an angry child who's ready to throw some punches, is when you get hurt. 
And admittedly, you're the same way when it comes to her.
"I'm not making excuses for him, I know him. He'd never intentionally hurt someone."
"But he did hurt you!!!"
"I know and I doubt he realises it," you sigh. "But I need to know his side of things."
"I'm sure he will run if you try to confront him," she grumbles. "He'll probably not even reply if you tell him how much of a dick he's been."
"Heyyy," a childish whine escapes your lips. "I have more faith in him than that. He respects me enough to talk things out."
She makes a sound of complete disbelief, "You bet my ass he would just pull stuff out of his ass."
"We will see," you chuckle.
You had to make up your mind sooner or later and somehow the conversation with your best friend has reminded you of the faith you have in Taehyung. If you need answers, you're sure he'd give them. Most importantly, you don't plan on losing the friendship you have with him this easily. But you don't think you'd be able to just push everything aside and pretend that things are fine. You need to clear it out. You need for him to realise that he has hurt you and you need to know how things changed so quickly. 
—————————————————————
You: hey 
It took you another day to get the simple three-letter word out of your system. But you do it the very first thing in the morning after waking up. Whatever roller coaster ride of emotion it is going to take you on, you want it over by today. 
Thankfully, it takes only ten minutes for your phone to ping to notify you of a message from Taehyung. 
Tae 🐻: hello, birdie 👋
A snort escapes you when you imagine all the lovely cuss words that would leave your best friend's mouth if she were to learn of his response to your 'hey'.  
You, too, find yourself being amused yet disappointed at how oblivious he seems to be. 
You: I'm sorry for not responding to your texts any sooner
Chewing on your lower lip, you click on the send button. While this text is meant to serve as an apology, it also serves as a means for you to know whether he really is as clueless as he seems. You're curious if he's at least aware that something must have been wrong for you to not text for this long.
Tae 🐻: It's okay, don't worry. I understand!
Tae 🐻: work can get busy 
Tae 🐻: it's fine! 
Sighing, you realise it's fruitless. You need to be upfront as there's no other way for you to go about it. 
You: uhmm thanks 
You: but before we catch up and all that, can I just get a few things off my chest?
Tae 🐻: sure! Go ahead. 
Suddenly you find yourself feeling anxious. You are not quite sure how this is going to turn out and how you're going to put your emotions into words. It sure appears to be a difficult job considering how muddled your brain feels every time you think about the events that have led to this.
You:  i don't really know how to say what i want to say lol
You: this is so awkward
Tae 🐻: just say it
Tae 🐻: it's the same ol' me after all
Some of your anxiety softens at his words. 
You: i know but i just dk how to say it 😂
Tae 🐻: that's okay
Tae 🐻: would it be more comfortable for you if I were to go offline? and I can check your messages when you give me the green signal to open your texts? 
Now that he mentions it, you think that would be lovely. That way you could take your time figuring out how to word your sentences without having the rush of typing things out fast over the worry of him coming to assumptions before you say the full thing. 
You: that'd be great! 
You: thank you! 
Tae 🐻: well then, I'll go offline. You speak your heart out 😌
You: open my texts only when you see a thumbs up or a message that directly asks you to open it. Okay?
Tae 🐻: done 👍
Sighing, you relax on your sofa and think. Now that he's offline, you need to figure out what to say. Rather, where to start because you just have so much to say. 
It takes you another two or three minutes before you start typing. 
You: so idk how this is gonna sound or how it's gonna get interpreted but I really need this out of my chest for it's been bothering me the last few days. 
You: so ummm, you know we both had openly admitted to having feelings for each other and then you told me you weren't really ready for a relationship? And I agreed to things being the way they were because I never wanted to pressurise you. I always wanted to be a friend first, whom you can trust and feel safe with, more than anything else. 
You: it's true that we never had a name for what we were. But it's because of that very reason that it always remained very confusing to me as to where we stood. Especially where you stood. 
You: i always could have asked in the course of the year as to where we stood but i always let you be because i was cautious that asking you, would in a way, pressurise you. 
You: however, that is not to say that i wasn't put in a dilemma when i would get propositions for going out on dates or when someone would ask me out. 
You: i didn't know where your feelings for me lied. While I avoided any assumptions, i also didn't act as if you did not have feelings for me. Because what if you did and then my actions hurt you? I knew how much you have been hurt in the past and i just didn't want to add to that. 
Your fingers pause as you take a look at what you have covered so far. When you go through your last two texts, you go awry at the thought of sounding like someone who's claiming to have done him some huge favour. 
You: I'm not saying all this to say that i have done you a huge favour or something by the way. Or that you owe me something in return. 
You: I'm just saying this because when you're so cautious and thoughtful over someone, it hurts to be on the receiving end of actions that make you feel incredibly stupid. 
You: it would have been better if you had told me, you know? That "hey, there's this girl i like," and I'm not saying in a way that you had to take my permission or something but just that it would have been nice to know that you thought of me and of what kind of an effect it would have on me. 
You: I just wish I didn't have to learn from a WhatsApp status 
You pause before thinking if you have missed anything. When you go through your words, you realise that you indeed have missed something important. 
You see, in the mix of all the heavy emotions, you also are happy. You're happy for him. That's something you realised the very day you learned about his relationship. It's odd but even in the midst of all the confusion you were feeling, a part of you felt glad.
You were glad that he found someone he loves and someone who makes him happy. You also found yourself excited on his behalf. 
You won't lie, you were surprised that you weren't jealous. Before Taehyung, for a long time, you had hardly had any guy in your life except for fleeting crushes. Even then, you can acknowledge the fact that jealousy is a very natural emotion to feel in this scenario. However, when you realised that you were happy for him and that happiness did not originate from a place where you had to force it, you were also proud. 
To you, there's no greater testimony of your love than that. 
You: i don't think i have mentioned this before but I'm really happy and excited for you.
You: go ahead and open your texts ig 😂
There are questions in your mind that you think would have been better had you asked them. Questions as to how he was unwilling to be in a relationship when it came to you but suddenly found himself being in a relationship a year later? 
However, you decide that's something you'd rather not ask. 
When you think of it, you indeed find it unfair and there's perhaps that hint of anger that bubbles in your stomach. But you recognise that there's no purpose in asking that question. 
It's possible that his feelings for her run deeper than they ever did for you. Or it could be the fact that they work together and it's human that you'd grow close to someone who's there with you physically rather than someone whom you only talk to over the phone or via texts. 
But figuring out the why is none of your business. Neither is it something you're concerned with. Whatever the reason might be, he's in a relationship and he has already made a choice. The why is irrelevant now. 
Another reason, the why is irrelevant to you is because, you have never found yourself thinking along the lines of what you could have done differently for him to stay and choose you. You have never wondered if it was something you lacked. You'd never let yourself think that way for anyone. Once upon a time, you did. You were filled with insecurities and would question yourself anytime someone would hurt you or leave you. But you have overcome that and have learnt to love yourself. You'd never undo all that progress by entertaining those thoughts ever again. Even if it's Taehyung. 
Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen letting you know Taehyung is typing. His text soon arrives making your breath hitch. 
Tae 🐻: I have read your texts. Give me some time, and I'll reply to them. 
So you'll have to wait. 
It's fair you think, he can take the time he needs, to figure out what he has to say. 
You only hope you can get over this soon. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It's been an entire day since Taehyung said he'd reply to your texts but unfortunately, he hasn't yet. 
You know he will reply, you have that faith in him but you only wish he'd do it sooner. There's that lingering anxiety that comes with being unable to predict what he's going to say. 
You have also been wondering if you have worded your words correctly. You found yourself worrying what if you came across as jealous and as someone who's unhappy for him? You really hope you didn't sound bitter because you aren't. 
Yes, there's a part of you that is sad because the moments that you thought were special for the both of you, were all in your head. Because you loved him.
There's also this feeling that now you have been replaced. That now, things won't ever be the same. Perhaps, a part of you wishes you could stay in your head a little longer and pretend. 
But all of that aside, you also have immense amounts of trust in the friendship you both share. Taehyung is someone who is incredibly kind and loving, and he's a great friend in general and you're sure that both of you would somehow manage to keep your friendship intact.
Penny: Has he replied yet? 
You look down at the screen to find a text from your best friend.
You: no 
You: not yet 
Penny: huh told you
Penny: he's a dick 
You smile and shake your head.
Knowing you have a long day ahead, you cook yourself a plate full of breakfast and get ready for work. In a way, you're glad that there's work to keep you busy. You do not know what you'd have done had it been a Sunday. You'd probably have been restless as fuck and would have been checking your phone every five minutes.
Thanks to your workload, you only get time to check your phone during lunch. However, the workload doesn't help with the disappointment you feel, when each time that you do check your phone and find that there's no new message from Taehyung. The disappointment only increases when you realise he has put a status about some funny fact regarding hyenas. 
Whatever he sends you as a response to your texts, it better be good to have you kept waiting this long. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It's nine in the evening and you're at home when you finally receive Taehyung's text. Your anxiousness is overpowered by curiosity and impatience as you click on his message. It's a wordy and lengthy one. 
Tae 🐻: I was confused, Y/N. Very confused. Although I had confessed my feelings to you, I was extremely confused and scared to take a step forward. When things with Kira ended, I was lonely and sad and my thoughts were very self-destructive. I had zero self-confidence. Talking to you, spending time with you, and texting you gave me the greatest joy and it acted as an escape from those thoughts, feelings and difficulties I was facing at the time. However, if you ask me now, where my feelings originated from, I wouldn't be able to tell. Were they genuine or a result of my love-starved state, I wouldn't be able to tell. But I'm glad it did as it helped me move on from the grief that accompanied my breakup. You have no idea how much you helped me at the time and I was selfish enough to take all of it, without thinking of the consequences, one of which was falling for you. This conversation we are having now is one which we should have had long ago. But I was scared that me not taking the step forward and telling you all this, would make you lose interest in me. Instead, I kept you hanging. I thank you for always being such an amazing friend. I have always loved you but I was too scared to put the tag of a relationship. I mistook my infatuation as readiness for being in a relationship. I'm guilty of all the things you mentioned but I don't know what to do to make things right, as I really don't want to lose the friendship we have. With all that I have done, you'd obviously think that I don't care about you, or at least not as much as you do, but trust me, I do. I have just been shit at expressing my gratitude and telling you how much you mean to me. I'll do better. I just hope you have it in your heart to forgive me for my mistakes. Thank you.
Something that you have been really hoping for, finally happens. You cry. 
Fat, angry droplets of tears roll down your face and you close your eyes shut as the searing pain spreads in your chest. 
Everything just feels so final and also so fruitless. 
Three little dots appear at the bottom of the screen and you realise that Taehyjng must have noticed that you have read his message. 
Tae 🐻: say something
Tae 🐻: this is making me anxious 😅
Despite your blurry vision and him being the cause of your pain, you feel the need to put him at ease. 
You: i appreciate you being honest with me 
You: I'll reply properly in a while 
You: just let me have a good cry first 
The petty part of you wants him to know that you're crying, you want him to know how hurt you are. 
Tae 🐻: Y/N?
Tae 🐻: are you okay?
You don't reply, not having it in yourself to lie.
You let your tears flow as you cry silently.
It's too much for you. You feel used. You feel like a rebound. You feel like a bridge he walked on to reach his destination and to move on from his past. Your heart feels walked all over. Your love feels irrelevant. 
It's true that you wanted to make him feel good. You wanted him to move on from the hurt caused by Kira. You wanted him to feel good about himself. All because you loved him. But you never thought your love was so disposable to him. That it would only be the means for him to move on to someone else. 
What's worse is, despite all of that you understand. You understand that it wasn't a conscious choice of his to hurt you. He, himself, wasn't aware that he was using your love to heal himself. 
It's worse because a part of you feels bitter and angry. If you were the one who helped him get over his hurt, shouldn't he show at least a bit of loyalty to you? You feel angry because he didn't communicate, he left you in the dark and just assumed that you must have been detached enough from your feelings for you to not be bothered by his new relationship. But then a part of you understands that as well. 
With Taehyung, it's a tug of war where you want to be mad at him and feel betrayed by him but no matter what, your love for him makes you see things from his point of view. 
In a way, you find it surprising as well because you never realised just how deep your love runs. Seeing their side of things despite the hurt they have caused? Isn't that love at its purest? However, that makes you ache in pain as well. You loved him as your own. Only to realise that his love for you was merely an infatuation.
His love for you was shallow. 
You think it would have been better if he were an asshole whom you could just hate. It would have been easier for you because you'd know he wasn't worth your time. But how do you handle all of this when he's one of your closest friends? 
That's a question you'd probably need time to answer. You need time to let the stinging pain in your chest subside. You need time to let yourself process the silent heartbreak you're going through. 
With shaky hands and blurry vision, you block Taehyung. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
Last Friday of every month, all your colleagues go out to have dinner and drinks together. You enjoy accompanying them because honestly, it is nice and fun, almost like a little treat to yourself. However, this week, you're not really sure you'd like that. You don't have the energy to socialise.
One might argue that with recent events in mind, the best thing to do would probably be just that, to socialise, as it would take your mind off things that have been bugging you. But then you have always been the type who needs energy to socialise rather than the kind who energises themselves from socialising. 
You have almost completed packing your bag when someone taps on your shoulders. 
"You're coming with us today, right?" Shanaya queries, having a suspicious glint in her eyes as if she's already aware of your plans of not joining. 
Shaking your head softly, you confirm her suspicions. However, Shanaya is having none of that.
"You have to come," she insists, sounding determined. "It's my birthday treat."
You're thoroughly surprised at the information. "It's your birthday today? Oh my god, I'm so sorry–"
"It's not today, it's tomorrow," she cuts you off. "But tomorrow is off so it's an early birthday treat."
She looks at you with such pleading eyes that you cannot bring yourself to say no to her. Reluctantly you smile and the next thing you know, you're being wrapped in a warm hug. 
"Yay, thank you," she squeals, excited. "Now common, let's go."
As it turns out, today's destination is one stop away. Usually, you all go to someplace that's near and doesn't require transportation. However, Shanaya wanted to take all of you to a particular place that, according to her, serves the best dumplings and noodles. Who can say no to Shanaya, anyway?
As you sit there and wait with the others for the bus to arrive, you look at the screen with Taehyung's conversation open. 
It's only yesterday that you unblocked him. You were well aware that you'd be unblocking him and talking to him again at some point. The friendship was too precious for you to let go. And it's not something you're saying simply because you love him. If you were to look back, Taehyung has never been a bad friend to you. He's been there for you whenever you needed. He has never let you down when it comes to friendship. 
However, you doubt you're ready to talk to him just yet. That doesn't mean you don't want to.
There's just so much that you have to tell him. The little things that have occurred over the course of the two weeks that you had him blocked. Everything feels a little incomplete unless shared with him. 
Your fingers hover over his profile picture and you hesitate to click on it. He has uploaded a new profile picture and you wonder if it is too weird to just stare at it.
"Y/N?" 
The sound of your name startles you and while trying to hide your phone screen, you accidentally end up clicking on the small call button right next to the profile picture. 
Shit. Shit. Shit. 
You cut the call immediately and stare at the screen which now shows his name at the top of your call logs. He's gonna see a missed call from you, shit. 
"The bus is here, Y/N."
Oh right, that must be why Mike had called for you. You quickly gather your thoughts and get on the bus, shying away from the worried look Shanaya throws your way. 
When you get a seat on the bus, the first thing you do is shoot him a text. You indeed are not ready to talk to him but your accidental call has ruined your plans. 
You: I'm so sorry
You: i called you by mistake
You know it will probably be a while until he sees your call and your text and it's a good thing that you have your co-workers to accompany you. That way you'd be distracted enough to not fret about it unnecessarily. 
All of you get down when your stop arrives and make your way inside the small restaurant. 
The chatter and the giggles and the latest gossip about your boss is enough for you to temporarily ignore the sinking sadness that sits at the pit of your stomach. 
"Y/N, drinks?"
Your colleagues are well familiar with the answer to this question. You don't prefer drinking. The reason behind that, however, is not known to them.
Like the majority of people, you enjoy getting drunk and letting it loose. However, you're the kind of drunk who gets giggly and finds every little thing amusing. And for some reason, you feel comfortable to let that part of you out, only in the presence of a few people. Four, to be exact. 
One, your best friend. Two, Min Yoongi. Three, Lee Sana. And four, Kim Taehyung. 
Needless to say, you hardly ever get the chance to get drunk. 
The usual answer rests on the tip of your tongue, but there's also this desperation for you to let go of the heaviness. You really could do with some giggles and amusement.
"I'd probably have some whiskey," you reply with a shy unsure smile as your colleagues cheer.
The night somehow refuses to come to an end as you all soon find yourselves seated on the floor of Kate's apartment, in a circle. It starts off with some dancing and then Nitesh takes up the guitar and starts singing. He's a good singer, you can appreciate that and everyone's having fun with big smiles on their faces as they clap along with the beats. 
You have had three shots so far and for the love of god, you still feel that melancholy. It heightens when you realise you're sad in such a fun environment. Despite wanting to join them in their fun, your mind keeps wondering what it would be like if Taehyung were here. Gosh, it's been so long since the both of you have hung out and truthfully, it has never bothered you before. Whatever communication you two had was more than enough for you. Sharing the little details about your day, sending him silly stickers, all that held more meaning to you than he probably ever realised. That was much more intimate to you than anything physical.
You shake your head to yourself when you realise you're here being sad over a guy who wasn't even your boyfriend. It's so ridiculous. 
But then again, despite the lack of a label, you were loyal to him with your entirety.
Geez, the alcohol seemingly has made you more sensitive. 
"You sure are having fun," Shanaya comments. "I'm assuming the alcohol didn't help much?"
It doesn't take rocket science for someone to figure out that if a person who's never said yes to drinks before suddenly willingly says yes to them, there must be some pain they are trying to numb. 
"Surprisingly, no."
She hums. "Wanna talk about it?" 
Shanaya has asked this question to you multiple times over the span of the last few days. Never has it made you feel as if it's coming from a place where she is prying for details. It has only made you feel as if she's letting you know she's all ears, whenever you need her. Each time, you have shrugged as if it's not a big deal, as if it's not important enough for you to talk about. However, now, you really could do with a shoulder to cry on.
Hence, you vent and even amid all the noise and music, she intently listens to your words without interrupting even once. 
When you finish, she releases a heavy sigh. "That's what you meant when you said it was complicated."
You chuckle at the reminder of the response you had given to your then-new co-workers, to being asked about your love life. You were so cautious of hurting Taehyung, having no idea that it was going to be him, hurting you.
"Do you plan on being friends with him?" 
You don't miss the edge her tone has, as if she believes it's not worth it. Either that, or she thinks it's not possible to be friends with someone who's hurt you like that.
"I do," your reply is instantaneous. 
"Don't you feel angry?"
"I do," of course you are angry. It would be absurd if you were not. 
"Are you sure that is a good idea?"
You're not. You know the dynamic between you and Taehyung would never be the same again. Things would be different. You have now realised that things which meant a lot to you, perhaps never held the same meaning to him. The dynamic is bound to change. But is that good enough of a reason to cut your friendship off?
"He's only a human. People fall in love and sometimes, they fall out of love. I do not control the way he feels and when it comes to love, I don't think any of us have a control over who we fall for or when we fall," you release a sigh. Maybe it's all the more difficult for you because you still love him despite everything. "He's not in the wrong for falling for someone just because it's not me. I wish he would have not kept me in the dark but we all make mistakes, we all mess up."
"But more importantly, he's a friend first and he's always been an incredible friend to me. Now, I wouldn't be a good friend if I were to ever entertain the idea of making him choose between me and his happiness, would I?" 
She remains quiet for a moment, observing you closely. "Do you mean all that you said?"
You nod. 
She chuckles. "Well then, you have one of the purest hearts I have ever come across."
—--------------------------------------------------------
You were aware that there were unread texts from Taehyung but had refused to open them until morning. The night was exhausting and more than anything, you wanted to sleep. However, when morning came rolling, there was no avoiding opening his messages. 
Tae 🐻: why are you suddenly being so formal? 😂
Tae 🐻: it's completely fine.
Relief courses through your veins at his casual tone. You don't know how you'd have responded had he mentioned you blocking him seemingly out of nowhere. However, there's a small part of you that remains curious if he had even realised you blocked him. Nevertheless, you'd much rather put all of that behind you and move forward.
You: i was randomly scrolling through my phone and the next thing i knew, my phone was calling you 
Tae 🐻: lmao 
Tae 🐻: blame it on the phone, yes
You smile. Going back to being friends might not be that difficult. 
You two chat a bit and catch up with each other about things the both of you have been up to recently. You lose track of time as you make yourself a cup of tea, refusing to let your phone down, feeling excited at the thought of telling him about the things you have been up to. 
Tae 🐻: well i have something to tell you
You: uh oh
You: go on
Tae 🐻: so last day me and Bridget went on a date 
Tae 🐻: and things got steamy 👉👈
Tae 🐻: if you know what i mean
You very well know what he means.
Your stomach sinks in disappointment.
It's not because you're jealous or that the thought of Taehyung with someone else makes you feel disheartened, you have moved past that. Rather, you feel disappointed that he thought it was something appropriate to mention to you. 
Had it been anyone else in some other scenario, you'd have had no issue. Friends, close ones especially, tend to discuss these sorts of things, don't they? However, this is Taehyung and keeping the recent events in mind, he should not have mentioned it to you at all. Especially not when, his new relationship had made you feel as if he didn't bother to think of you, once. 
He keeps on going about how it was one of the best nights of his life but you don't find it in yourself to play pretend and entertain him. Although you don't directly ask him to stop, you don't reply to his texts either.
Tae 🐻: Y/N? 
The screen reads when he's done and probably upon the realisation that you haven't said anything for a long time. 
You: nice
Oh, how you wish technology was advanced enough for the text to be read aloud on his phone in a sarcastic tone.
You: let me tell you about yesterday
You: we went back to Kate's place 
You: and i got drunk simply because i was feeling low and sad and depressed and was looking for an escape 
You: but that didn't help, only enhanced what i was already feeling
You could have probably avoided saying this but then you wanted to say it. You don't know if he'll put two and two together but it's your own way of telling him that things are still sensitive.
Tae 🐻: you sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken 😂 
A loud laugh escapes your lips. Gosh, is this the guy you have been crying over for weeks? 
Wow.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Taehyung has let you down, as a friend. More than once. 
A few days back, he'd asked if he could send you a poem that he'd written. You had always known he liked writing stuff and hadn't thought much of it. However, upon asking what it was about, he had replied 'newfound love'. Your reply to which had been, 'In that case, I'm not interested'. 
You didn't care how that sounded, you were not gonna put up with this bullshit just because it would be impolite. 
With each passing day and with each small incident where you feel as if your feelings are totally disregarded, your disappointment keeps growing. You really had not expected this kind of behaviour from Taehyung. 
One of the main reasons you had fallen for him was the way he seemed so emotionally wise. He was aware and attentive towards the people around him and was always kind. His recent attitude contradicts all of that.
There is a part of you that also recognises how his recent behaviour has made you detached. You could not say that the Taehyung you fell in love with and the Taehyung now, are the same. In a very twisted way, it made accepting the fact that there's nothing between the two of you, except friendship much easier. 
Tae 🐻: Y/N
Tae 🐻: I messed up. 
The text comes at around one in the morning. The only reason you're awake is the report that's due in two days. But the incoming text puts your fingers to a pause as worry clouds your senses. 
Is he okay? 
You: what happened? 
Tae 🐻: i messed up 
Tae 🐻: i feel so embarrassed
You: can you stop being vague? 
Tae 🐻: i sent a vm to Bridget of me singing TS 
You couldn't help rolling your eyes when you read the words. Huh, you should have seen it coming. 
Unlike other times, for some odd reason, you find yourself leaning towards the idea of entertaining him. Perhaps it's because you haven't had a proper conversation with him for a long time. And also perhaps, because you know this won't go on for long. 
You: so?
Tae 🐻: she is a huge TS fan 
Tae 🐻: she asked me to sing one of her favourite songs
Tae 🐻: and i cannot ever bring myself to say no to her
Tae 🐻: but like now that i listen back to the audio i sound terrible and i maybe did a British accent while singing
Understandably, you can see where he's coming from. The nervousness that comes with making a gesture for someone you adore and then feeling embarrassed about it, worrying whether they found it romantic or did you make a fool of yourself. And less than one month of being in a relationship is not enough to quieten the nervous jitters. 
So, you tell him what you would have, had it been any other friend. Upon further chatting you realise he genuinely feels like crawling inside a hole and never coming out. It doesn't surprise you, Taehyung has always been like that, going for the big gestures and self-doubt creeping in later.
You let yourself enjoy the normalcy and pretend that Taehyung is just another friend of yours and that he isn't someone who broke your heart.
—--------------------------------------------------------
Your phone has been buzzing and pinging since morning. Midnight to be specific. Birthday wishes have been flowing in with notes and gifs and with each message you feel more appreciated than you feel the rest three sixty-four days of the year. 
However, with each notification sound, there has also been that hope and expectation that maybe this one would be from Taehyung.
He had texted you a few days back reminding you of your upcoming birthday and although it's afternoon already, you don't really believe that he has forgotten the day altogether. 
When evening rolls around, you start growing sceptic. You squirm in your sofa, finally acknowledging that it's very well a possibility that your birthday might have slipped his mind. It makes you go back to the long, seven-hundred-word, letter he had written for your birthday, last year. 
The words make you smile.
Do you know how amazing you are? I don't think you do and it will be my job to make you see that.
Sometimes, I think I don't deserve you with how kind and loving you are but I'm so incredibly grateful for you that no amount of words would ever be enough.
I have never met someone like you, ever. 
Only a few lines from the massive paragraph that his greeting text was and the corner of your lips lift up. However, the moment is broken when you realise you're smiling. 
You shake your head as sadness fills you. You cannot let yourself recall old memories and feel the way they used to make you. It's not an option anymore.
Locking your screen, you sigh. You won't lie, you had really wanted a text from him. Anything that would show you that he still cares for you and the friendship between the both of you still held a chance. It's no wonder that you have been seeking some sort of reassurance after everything that he has done. 
It's around eleven at night that Taehyung's name first appears on your notification bar. You grin wide and open your text, glad to have been proven wrong and feeling stupid to have considered the idea of him forgetting your birthday. 
A link to a YouTube video.
Your grin disappears just as quickly and disappointment like nothing you have ever felt before, makes its way to your heart. 
You leave him on seen.
A day passes and you wonder if he will send at least a belated wish, apologising for not wishing you any sooner. But nope 
It's the day after that, the second day past your birthday when you check for any messages from him and you are led to his stories. It's slides of pictures of him and Bridget and the caption is him singing praises of her and telling the world how much in love he is because it's her birthday. 
That's your last straw.
It's probably a very small issue, forgetting birthdays and all. But to you, it's not. It just adds up to the pile of things that have made you feel like you were the only one who was taking into consideration the friendship that was at stake.
Plus, it cannot be that difficult to remember your birthday when his girlfriend's birthday is literally two days after yours. 
You have had enough. You need to walk out of Taehyung's life.  
Considering all that had made you fall for Taehyung, it's incredibly hard for you to believe that he doesn't know what he is doing and that he has forgotten basic decency. The option that was left with you, didn't make sense to you either because it implied he let you down intentionally. But the Taehyung you knew would never hurt a fly. 
It made you wonder if it was simply a result of his honeymoon phase that he had forgotten to consider how his actions could hurt people. Maybe he was too elated to think things through.  The empathetic part of you understood. But then you shook that away, knowing very well that if you were in his position, irrespective of how happy and high you were, you would never do that. 
Maybe you had realised that this was coming from the very day, he hadn't thought twice before mentioning his intimate moments with Bridget. But, boy oh boy, had you hoped to be wrong.
You had given him opportunities to prove you wrong, to give you a reason to stay but he only kept giving you reasons as to why you should leave.
It's an odd sensation that washes over you when you come to the conclusion that this isn't worth it anymore. 
You feel sad that the friendship is coming to an end. You're sure you'd miss his company and that there would be days when you mourn the friendship that once used to be. You know there would be times when you'd resent him and there would also be times when you'd feel angry at yourself for giving so much of you to him. 
But you won't ever regret your choice of leaving him. 
One thing this whole ordeal with Taehyung has made you realise is how deeply you love. How even in the midst of hurt, you were happy for him and how you saw and loved him for what he was and not for what he could be or for what he offered you. It made you take pride in the way you love. You gave him the purest form of love. 
A life where you and Taehyung are not friends, won't be your loss. It would be his. Irrespective of whether he realises that or not.
You feel oddly poweful with the knowledge that there was nothing lacking in your love and you'd never dishonour your love by staying where it isn't valued, appreciated and seen. 
But you also have a lot to say to him. You are not going to just block him and let him wonder why you did that. No, you'd tell him exactly why you left. 
—--------------------------------------------------------
It took you a couple of days to get down everything you wanted to say. There were times when you felt conscious of the ever-growing length of your letter and you had to shake off that feeling because this was going to be the last interaction between the both of you. Why stop yourself from saying everything you want to just because you're worried it'll be lengthy? 
You read the words one last time, wanting to make sure that you feel satisfied. 
Hello Taehyung, 
I hope you're doing fine. I wouldn't know how you're doing because we haven't had a proper conversation in quite some time. Or at least that is how it has felt to me. Nevertheless, I'm writing this because there's loads that I need to get off my chest. So, here we go.
When I saw you for the first time and we talked, I could feel you carried a lot of pressure on your shoulders. Almost like, you had something to prove, like you wanted to show that you weren't what you were perceived to be. Or maybe you wanted to prove that you were more than just what meets the eye. I didn't know what in particular. It felt like you wanted to be seen. 
And would you believe, I grew a soft spot for you? Do you know why? Because somewhere, I felt the same way too. 
I also knew we would be great friends, lol. You know how? Because I knew you had a heart of gold. You cared for others, you were thoughtful and kind. However, I could feel that you have a habit of being harsh on yourself and it didn't sit well with me. From the very first time we talked, I wanted to be a good friend to you, someone you could rely on, someone you could trust and someone who could possibly make you be a little less harsh on yourself. 
Perhaps with the weak spot, I also grew protective of you.
You were desperate for love and at the same time felt unworthy of it. I didn't know why though. I didn't know what had you believing so lowly about yourself. But then you told me about Kira, and it all made sense. 
It made sense why you felt unworthy and why you felt the need to prove that you were more than what others saw. Because, you believed Kira's words. You really thought you were unlovable. 
Instead of feeling the satisfaction of  being proved right, I felt so angry at Kira. I may have clawed her eyes out in my mind more than once. 
After learning the scars that she left on you, it only made me wish you could see yourself the way I do. I wished you could see that there was nothing you had to do to be loved except for just being you.
You may wonder why I'm suddenly saying all this. Well, let's just say it's necessary.
When you told me you were falling for me, I was surprised but then I felt myself feeling so warm at the thought of you liking me. It took me a few minutes to realise that I was falling for you too. 
But that was it. 
We never put a label on what we were and I was okay with it. Because I was okay with what we had, I never asked for anything because you were happy. You were also such a great friend, someone who I could talk to anything and everything about. What more could I ask for?
What's more? I could tell you were slowly coming out of whatever shell you were put in by Kira. I can't quite explain how it made me feel to see you smile more freely, to see you be more confident and be sure of yourself. But to put it lightly, it made me feel damn good lol.
I knew I had some part to play in it. I just didn't know that was the only part you wanted me to play. 
I moved past all that, trust me. You using my love as a rebound, making a girlfriend without even letting me know once, I moved past all that. Because, I trusted you when you told me you were confused and confusion is never intentional, is it? 
It hurt like a bitch to think that was all my love meant to you. But it was okay, you didn't mean to hurt me. You cared about me. You cared about our friendship. You valued it. 
Or so you said. 
I don't know if you meant it when you said it. But in case you did mean it, here are a few things not to do to the girl you used as a rebound and intend to keep the friendship with.
First, do not mention that you had sex with your new girlfriend. 
Second, do not be dumb enough to say "You sound like a typical guy whose heart has been broken" when you are the guy who's caused the damage. 
Third, do not send her the song you sang for your girlfriend and seek comfort to soothe the embarrassment you feel.
Fourth, do not ask her to read the poems you wrote for your girlfriend.
Fifth, do not forget her birthday when your girlfriend's is just two days later. 
These things didn't hurt me as much as it disappointed me. Would you believe, I laughed when you called me a typical heartbroken guy? When I got drunk the day before, my head was filled with thoughts of you and my heart was heavy with the knowledge that I was only a rebound. That day, even in the midst of alcohol, I chose our friendship over everything. I chose to forgive you. I chose to love you, still. But when you mentioned what you did, I just found it so funny to think that this was the guy I was thinking so much about and was so sad about. 
As it turns out, I'm not much fond of thoughtless people. 
But still, I hoped that somehow you'd give me a reason to stay. All you did, however, was turn a blind eye to my feelings and disrespected me.
If you were to ask me, whether my love for you is romantic or platonic, I wouldn't be able to tell. I have never sat and thought about it. All I know is I loved you, in one of the most unselfish ways possible. 
But that's not to say I don't realise how I deserve to be treated. And that's not to say that I'd stay somewhere where I'm an afterthought. 
When I said, I was happy for you and Bridget I really meant it and I hope you don't think that your relationship ever had a role to play in this decision of mine. It didn't, it was solely you that made me choose this option.
But this friendship of ours has run its course.
I would never disrespect myself by putting up with your disrespect. I loved you as long as you were worth it. But the moment you took my love for granted was the very moment you lost my respect and love, both. 
If you have made it to the end, then congrats! I didn't know if you'd read the whole thing but truth be told I don't particularly care about you reading it either. I wrote this for myself, not for you. 
Before I finish this long-ass letter, let me tell you something; you have lost one of the best people you'd ever meet in this lifetime. 
Thank you,
With Love,
The purest form.
Jeon Jungkook
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His words echo in your mind and after an elongated pause, you find it in yourself to respond. “What do you mean?”
Jungkook gulps, hating how controlled your facial expressions are. In the months of knowing you, he has never seen you try this hard to hide your emotions. “Me and Niki are not actually a couple.”
“Thank you for rephrasing the sentence but I am afraid that it does not make things any clearer for me.”
Jungkook takes a sharp inhale and meets your eyes with uncertainty. “It’s just a PR stunt.”
It takes a few moments for the words to register but when they do, things start making sense, almost like puzzle pieces falling in place.
Namjoon’s hesitance in answering your question about the truth of their relationship. His lack of shock to the words you had heard Niki speak and most importantly, why Niki might have said those words. The whole relationship is not real to begin with.
“But, why?” The words leave your lips without your permission, before you’re able to catch them.
For a moment, he hesitates, wondering if it’s his place to say a few of the things he will have to, to make things clear.  But then he shakes off the worry, knowing Niki won’t mind.
“Both of our fandom, for some reason, ship us together. You know the whole ‘both are maknaes’ thing. Nevertheless, both of our companies thought it would be mutually beneficial for the two of us to put up this false act that we are dating.”
“How is it supposed to be mutually beneficial?” It doesn’t make sense to you. One of the oddest and most toxic traits of the kpop industry is how idols are expected to be loyal to their fans by remaining single. How then, a public relationship is supposed to garner anything except for unnecessary attention and hate?
“Niki is well, dating a youtuber. A female youtuber and pictures of them hanging out together didn’t take long to make it to the internet. Although at the beginning, everyone thought they were just good friends, soon there were questions as to whether it was just a simple friendship and well, people were not really happy with that idea,” he sighs, feeling tired just from thinking about everything that had led to this whole ordeal. “It wasn’t only about Niki dating a girl, it was also about her dating someone that wasn’t me. And of course, it was her girlfriend’s fault for coming between two people who are 'meant to be'. All of which ultimately made it incredibly difficult for the two of them to be at peace.”
You can imagine. The thought makes you sympathise with both of them. From Jungkook's words, it's clear the target was Niki’s girlfriend but you are sure it couldn’t have been easy for Niki to watch someone she loves hurt like that.
You understand Niki’s part of the deal. Putting up this font, would stop the threats and hate aimed at them but what was Jungkook supposed to get from this?
Jungkook looks at you and nods, acknowledging the unasked question. "When the offer first came, our company had turned it down, not seeing how it could benefit me. But I was the one who insisted and agreed."
"Why?" 
His discomfort grows and he swallows nervously, trying to gather his thoughts. "People are obsessed with me and Niki to the point where it's very predictable that they would hate it if someday I were to date someone who isn't her. I thought it would be good if we did this thing and people believed that we gave it a shot but it didn't work out. That way it would be one less thing I'd have to worry about while dating someone."
You put the thought behind of how it seems incredibly far-fetched and nod. He has answered your question about the nature of their relationship and why it was necessary. However, you still have a bunch of questions about a lot of things–starting with how crushed you felt when he moved you as Namjoon's make-up artist out of nowhere–but you do not wish to let them see the light of the day. 
Turning away, you start shuffling with some of the make-up products, indicating that the conversation is done. 
"Please say something," Jungkook pleads, tormented by your silence. 
"There's nothing more to say," you mutter, keeping away any emotion from being shown. 
"That can't be true."
You hate how sure he sounds. As if he is aware of every thought that's running in your head. As if he knows you a little too well. You absolutely despise how you might have believed the notion, once. Now, however, you do not want to. Because that'd mean he knew exactly how much hurt, his ignorance and pretence as if you don't even exist, caused you. 
"Y/N, please. We haven't talked for a long time. Please don't shut me out." 
Technically, you have two options. One, to keep ignoring him. Two, to snap at him and let every bit of your anger out. You had initially planned on sticking to option number one as it would make you look just as indifferent as Jungkook. However, now you find the option of letting words out without a filter, very appealing. 
"I know, I messed up but just talk to me–" the sound of a shaky exhale meets your ears, "–I miss spending time with you."
Well, that's some audacity. 
In the blink of an eye, you're facing Jungkook and taking several steps in his direction. You stop only a few steps away from him but you're close enough for him to notice the agony and pure rage storming through your eyes. 
"You better shut your mouth, Jeon." 
Jungkook flinches at your warning tone. However, he refuses to take the hint. "Y/N, ignoring me isn't going to solve–"
"Trust me, I'm not trying to solve anything," you speak through gritted teeth. "I'm just doing what I think is the right thing to do after someone disrespects you immensely."
"I wasn't trying to disrespect you," he claims, desperately trying to make you believe in something you don't buy for even a second.
"Yeah, ghosting me out of nowhere is not disrespecting me at all," your voice drops with sarcasm 
He feels his heart drop when you use the word 'ghosting'. Did you think that's what he did? Is that what it looked like? Gosh, this has all gotten messed up and he's the one to be blamed.
"I didn't ghost you," he mumbles, unable to look into your eyes and the sight of it causes all the pain that you had buried, to come to the surface. 
"Then please explain what it was," you voice waivers and you immediately hate yourself for showing weakness. "Please tell me what you thought you were doing by replacing me without even showing the basic decency to inform me that, yourself?"
He gulps, wondering if you'd even believe what he has to say. Even if you do, would you be willing to look past his stupidity?
"I found your note in my bag", you visibly flinch at the mention of the note. You had intentionally kept from mentioning your little confession, praying to whatever god is out there that somehow the note had been damaged before it reached the hands of the person they were meant to find. 
Jungkook notices your change of expression as it turns from hurt to embarrassed to anger and he despises himself for making you feel like that. "I had to make a quick decision and I didn't think you'd like to be my make up artist while I was fake dating Niki, especially without you having any knowledge about the fake part."
You stare at him blankly and try to process what he was saying. Did he–did he think he was doing you a favour by cutting you off?
You scoff, turn around and start packing your things with the intention of leaving the room. You're so done with this conversation.
When Jungkook understands your intention, he's quick on his feet and rushes to be right next to you. "Just give me the chance to explain myself fully."
You don't reply, your insides fuming.
"Y/N please," he begs. "Just hear me out once. Then I'll accept whatever it is that you decide for the both of us."
"I'm not gonna stand here and hear you speak utter bullshit that does nothing but let me down further."
Your voice comes with such a sense of finality that Jungkook knows, no matter how much he begs and pleads, you won't be giving him the opportunity to speak his side of things. 
Hence, he doesn't stop you when you walk past him and leave the room. But it only makes him more desperate for the day when you finally find it in your heart to give him a chance. Just one.
—-----------------------------------------------------
Jungkook has been persistent. Perhaps a little too persistent with his attempts to earn your forgiveness. Or at least that's what you assume the bouquets of flowers and little notes you find everyday at work are for. 
It's not only the flowers, it's also his constant texting and voicemails. His texts vary from a simple 'hi, what are you doing' to 'please, i miss you' and his voicemails have been a mix of him telling you about his day (something he used to do regularly when you were his makeup artist) to a more emotional version of his texts begging you to talk to him. 
You won't lie, his incessant pleadings have made you curious what more could he possibly have to say. What could be so different from what he has already said that he is so desperate? 
On one hand, you find an odd sense of satisfaction from not responding to Jungkook despite all his efforts. You don't know what that makes you but after the hurt and embarrassment you felt to the point where you had to numb yourself to block those emotions out, his tries and attempts feel like an ointment to your wounds. On the other hand, however, is a voice nagging you as to how, this cannot go on for long. The huge bouquets that wait for you everyday are soon going to catch attention and if anyone were to catch a hint of who it is from…gosh, you don't want to imagine that.
But when you will find it in yourself to have a conversation with him, still remains unknown. All you know is whenever that will be, it will be solely because you don't want word to go out. Yes, that's all it will be. 
Today when you walk into Namjoon's dressing room, there's another bouquet waiting for you. The sight of it causes you to sigh. You don't know what Namjoon thinks of this but you're thankful that he hasn't mentioned it yet. That however, made it quite clear that he has some idea as to who they are from.
You let the flowers be where they are. You have never really taken them home or put them in water, afraid that it would be interpreted as you being accepting of his efforts, when you're far from it. You're still hurt and angry. 
If anything, sometimes you despise walking into a room full of flowers as they serve as a reminder of the thoughts you had before confessing to him. You remember thinking how confessing felt like putting a delicate unbloomed flower in someone's hand and whether the bud gets to bloom or not, depends on the person you're confessing to. 
If only you had known of the thorns you would be exposed to, back then, you'd never have confessed. 
The door swings open softly and Namjoon walks in. "Good morning, Y/N."
"Good morning," you greet him back with a smile. 
"So what's on card for today?" He asks before taking his usual seat. 
"There's nothing much for today, just rehearsals and then you have a v-live," you mumble. "But firstly I need to do your weekly facial."
He huffs. "Is it the one that requires you putting a lot of slimy stuff on my face and it stays on for like thirty minutes?" 
"Yep," you reply with a light laugh. Despite what he says, you have learnt that Namjoon quite enjoys his facial sessions. Unlike a certain someone. 
Your smile falters and your sudden change of mood doesn't go unnoticed by Namjoon. 
"Have you considered speaking to Jungkook?" He asks after a brief moment of silence. 
You're taken aback by his words. Namjoon has always avoided speaking on the matter. He has never even queried as to what you do with the flowers. Hence, his direct way of questioning has you fumbling with words. 
"I d–haven't," you change your wording, fearing 'I don't want to', might just be a little too rude. 
However, your choice of answer is put to vain with the very next question he asks. "Do you want to?" 
"I don't want to," you softly shake your head, mildly afraid how Namjoon will interpret it.
He simply nods, without any trace of judgement. "I'm not saying this because I'm picking sides, but I have known Jungkook since he was a kid and I can tell that he really is sorry. 
"Whether to forgive him or not, is completely on you. But put a little trust on him that he must have some reason behind doing what he did. Just hear him out once."
You keep quiet, unsure what to say. Thankfully, Namjoon understands that and soon changes the topic of conversation to something more light-hearted. 
Hours later, when everything comes to a close and it's time for you to leave, you find yourself hesitating. Namjoon's words simply refuse to leave your mind. Put a little trust in him. How can you, when he's let you down in every way possible? When he has betrayed your trust in ways that still keep hurting you? 
You gulp when you realise there's probably no end to the hurting until you have a chat with Jungkook and hear his side. At least, that way you will know his reasoning behind everything and it will hopefully stop your self loathing for putting the note in his bag. Even if all he gives is excuses, you'd at least have the satisfaction of having heard him out. Later maybe a week, or a month from now, when your emotions subside, you wouldn't have this unscratched itch of not knowing what he had to say. 
Maybe, maybe it's for the best that you talk to him.
—-----------------------------------------------------
"Come in," Jungkook calls out in response to the knock at his door and is visibly surprised when you walk in. He quickly gets up from his seat, stuffs his phone in his pocket and with a nervous voice asks, "would you like some coffee?"
You shake your head. You're not here for coffee. "No, thank you. I'm here to talk to you."
He nods as his nervousness spikes. This is what he has wanted and hoped for so long, but now that you're here, he doubts you will believe him. What if you don't? Even worse, what if you do and still don't forgive him?
The both of you get seated and your fingers anxiously play with the strap of your handbag. "What is it that you have been wanting to tell me?"
Jungkook sighs. Pushing the nervousness away, he knows that the only thing in his power is to tell you his side of things. Otherwise, he's powerless. 
"For the things I said last day, to make sense, I would have to mention that I like you," he cannot find it in himself to look at you as he says that. "I've liked you for a long time."
The words take you by surprise, and your mouth parts in shock. The shock then morphs into disbelief and denial. He did not just confess to liking you.
"But it's never that simple when you're a famous K-pop idol," something bitter coats his words and he looks defeated. "The consequences of dating me, is something that one doesn't realise until they face it for themselves."
Jungkook has grown a thick skin. But you? He doesn't want you to be someone who ever has to go through things that require you to build a thick skin. He doubts he will ever forgive himself if he were to see you beaten up by harsh words and constant criticism, all because of your association to him.
"I wanted to tell you how I felt but just the sheer terror of what you may have to go through, kept me from doing so," an unwanted shiver runs through his body when he recalls the moments where the fluttering in his chest would always be accompanied by a heavy sinking in his stomach. "It wasn't my choice to stress about these things but I couldn't help myself considering that associating with me had consequences."
Your face falls with each word that leaves his lips. 
"It was choosing between giving into my feelings and listening to logic. I tried to be logical and practical for as long as I could. Until, I just couldn't," a humourless chuckle escapes his lips. "I remember thinking that I just need to tell you how you make me feel."
He doesn't voice how there was a part of him that had wished you'd not reciprocate his feelings. That way, even after his sheer selfishness, things would be fine. 
"It was around the time I decided on confessing to you, that I learnt about the proposition from Niki's agency. Call me incredibly stupid but I thought if I did this, I'd at least do something instead of sitting and dreading with my hands tied." Jungkook shakes his head, finding it cruel that even after all this, he somehow managed to mess everything up. 
Your mouth parts unknowingly when the pieces click. Jungkook's decision to date Niki for the cameras, didn't come out of nowhere and it wasn't as far-fetched as you thought. His decision had come from a place of anxiety where he felt powerless. 
"But then I found that note," he cannot help but recall that day fondly. He felt like a kid and often found himself smiling, looking into the mirror. However, that joy was soon wiped off when the situation sank in. "I was so excited and happy, but then I realised that I had already agreed to date Niki."
You hardly blink as Jungkook speaks and due to that, you don't miss the way a smile appears on his lips. But it's gone as soon as it appears, as if he catches himself slipping and reprimands himself for it. It makes you consider the possibility if he was receptive to your confession in a positive way. 
"I didn't know what to do, I couldn't imagine letting you know that I felt the same but then going out and holding another woman's hand. Even if it's for the cameras, it's–," he closes his eyes shut as if pained, "–it's horrible."
"I couldn't do that but I also needed to make a quick decision. I thought the only way to go about things was to postpone answering your confession. After the announcement of the breakup with Niki, I thought I could talk to you then and clear things out. At that moment, that was the only option that made sense to me."
His words take you back to the day when you were filled with nervous excitement only for it to be replaced with dread and heartbreak when you learnt that Jungkook had replaced you as his makeup artist, just like that. 
"It was stupid, I know," he mutters in a small voice. "I don't have anything to say in my defence except for admitting that I messed things up and I didn't realise what it must have looked like to you, until it was too late." 
He paused for a few moments, looking exhausted. "I-I am sorry for everything. I know it's hard to believe but hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do. I really just wanted to make things right. If you can, please, forgive me."
You sense that to be the end of everything Jungkook had to say. The way he looks at the floor and refuses to look at you, makes you want to comfort him. But your feelings are too muddled, you're too confused and there's a lot that you have learnt that has left you surprised. You don't think you're in the state of mind to make decisions now. 
"Thank you for telling me everything," you keep your voice soft. It gives Jungkook the courage to finally look up at you and his breath hitches when he realises you aren't looking at him with your gaze filled with hate and pain. It gives him hope. "But I need some time to process everything." 
Jungkook nods, knowing that's the best he can ask for at the moment. He's relieved that you aren't dismissing his words and feels incredibly grateful that you are taking time to think things through. He knows that you taking time is more for yourself than for him, but there's a hint of a promise that this is not the end of the conversation, that you'll talk to him again. And that's more than anything Jungkook can ever ask for.
—-----------------------------------------------------
The last few days, your mind has been completely occupied with Jungkook's words. Not only his words but also the way he looked refuses to leave your mind. You couldn't find it in yourself to doubt his genuineness and the fact that he was feeling terrible, was displayed in green neon lights. 
You had to remind yourself repeatedly that it isn't only about how he feels. You should cater to your feelings and figure out what to do next. 
There was also the new revelation that Jungkook liked you. Quite honestly, you didn't know what to do with that information. The whole conversation was melancholic and it must have rubbed off on you for you didn't feel the joy one usually does on learning that their crush likes them back. 
Everything was quite confusing. So much so, that it had taken an entirety of five days for you to sort out your thoughts and approach Jungkook. 
He sits across from you in a pale blue shirt and black trousers, his body language screams that he's nervous and oddly enough it comforts you to know that you aren't the only one feeling that way. 
"After learning everything, I couldn't help but wish you had communicated before. It would have saved the both of us a lot of hurt," you begin with a sombre tone, feeling your heart hurt at the constant overthinking you have had to go through. "Things might have been simpler that way." 
"I know," Jungkook nods, not having a single word to defend himself with. 
You look at him a moment longer wondering if he would try providing  you with a reason for his lack of communication. When he doesn't, you're confused how you're supposed to perceive it. 
On one hand, you'd have liked for him to actually have a proper reason. On the other, you're sure Jungkook is aware of his mistakes and his lack of response somehow gives the impression that he's owning up to everything without making excuses. 
"But what's done is done and there's no changing it," you continue after a small sigh. "It's for the best that we move on from it."
Jungkook's heart shrinks. By moving on do you mean just never acknowledging the feelings you both share for each other? That's exactly what comes to his mind because you feeling the same way you did, despite the hurt he has caused you, sounds too good to be true. He cannot be shameless either to ask you about it directly. He will take whatever you will give him. 
Instead, he asks a question which he knows would eat him alive if he doesn't voice it. "Can you forgive me?" 
"I wouldn't have asked for the both of us to move on, if I hadn't already," and then you do something that makes Jungkook feel like a ton of bricks have been lifted off from his chest. You smile at him.
Forgiving Jungkook wasn't easy. You wanted to hold on to the anger because your pride was hurt and most importantly, you were scared of getting hurt again. But then you also had to think through things logically. 
Jungkook has never had it easy with fame. Nothing could have ever prepared him for the way he has always been under scrutiny and his sudden loss of control over his own life. With time, he learnt that it was for the best to not pay attention to the people who weren't even familiar with him. 
He could overlook and turn deaf to the hate that's thrown his way. However, his loved ones being targeted is something that fills him with guilt to an inexplicable amount. You have seen it yourself. 
The incident isn't that old. A year back, Jungkook had gone out with a bunch of his childhood friends. He was pictured closing the car door for one of them, who so happened to be a girl. That one single shot was enough for the media and internet to decide there must be something more than platonic going between the two. 
You remember the way Jungkook was so troubled and absolutely heartbroken with the hate and threats that were aimed at his friend, for something so simple and it was visible to everyone that he blamed himself for it.
You cannot imagine what kind of stones would be thrown at you if word got out. The information that you're his makeup artist would be a cherry on top. Gold digger, witch, slut, whore; some of the less colourful terms. 
Seeing the way Jungkook suffered, it made sense why he would be so scared to be open about his feelings. You could imagine yourself feeling the same way had it been you being in his place. Seeing someone you care for, getting hate that they absolutely don't deserve, is painful enough for one to believe that it's for the best to keep distance. 
You also imagined what you would have felt had Jungkook admitted his feelings and had told you about the fake dating. Yes, you'd have the knowledge that there was nothing real between him and Niki. However, you'd also have to see them all over the internet and watch people go on and on about how perfect they are. You'd be aware that Jungkook likes you, but you'd also be bitter about how the beginning of your relationship is marked with him publicly dating someone else. It's not exactly a nice feeling. 
One could argue that the way events have turned out, they aren't perfect either. But there's nothing going on between Jungkook and you. At least, not yet. 
That's one thing that you both need to talk about and you really want to clear out everything, at once. Who knows what miscommunication would occur if things were left unsaid, again? 
"I would never intentionally hurt you, Y/N,"Jungkook squirms a little in his seat, ignoring the absence of the weight that has been eating him alive for days. He thinks you're going easy on him and he thinks he doesn't deserve it. 
"I am choosing to trust your words," you reply, having a sense of the turmoil Jungkook seems to be going through. The fact that he is always hard on himself is not unknown to you. "All I ask from you is to not break my trust. And for you to accept that you do not have to burden yourself with responsibilities."
Jungkook knows it's hard for him to not feel like there's always a bunch of responsibilities on his shoulder. Especially when one moment of misjudgement can cause irreversible damage. Despite that, he feels a sense of warmth spread throughout his body at your words. 
"I'll try."
You shoot Jungkook another smile; the second one this evening and he can't help but think that you should really stop giving him hope.
"There's one more thing that we need to talk about," your cheeks turn red and much like Jungkook earlier, it's your turn to squirm in your seat. "You said something about liking me."
You feel awkward at the choice of your words but then you aren't brave enough to start by mentioning your note of confession. 
Jungkook's eyes turn as wide as saucers and his whole face flushes to match the shade of your cheeks. He really wasn't expecting for you to bring it up. "Umm yeah," he nods. 
You feel a spark of impatience and annoyance at his short response. You took it upon yourself to bring the topic to the table and he cannot just spill everything, already? Why make it more difficult for you? 
"Yeah…..so?" You look at him with your brows raised, trying your best to ignore the way you feel like a three year old shy girl, on the inside. 
"I–I do like you," he stutters and looks away, for the umpteenth time, unable to meet your eyes. 
Your heart takes a fucking long jump. Who would have thought Jeon Jungkook would be so shy about admitting his feelings? 
"What should we do about it?" You intentionally use the 'we' for Jungkook to catch the hint that you want to do something about it. 
But of course, he doesn't. 
He speaks sullenly, "I have lost the right to have a say in the matter." 
"I want you to have a say in the matter. Tell me, Jungkook, what do you want?" You refuse to let go of the conversation and for Jungkook to let his guilt swallow him. He messed up, there's no denying that. But you could always acknowledge the fact that his heart was in the right place. 
Feelings of frustration makes his throat clogged up . "I just want to go back and redo things in a different way."
"That's not possible. What do you want to do now?"
He knows what he wants but voicing it, feels being ungrateful towards your forgiveness. It feels like he's being greedy. "What I do want, feels like too much to ask for."
"You'll never know until you ask for it." 
He sighs and reminds himself that you're asking him about the romantic feelings he has admitted to harbouring towards you. He reminds himself to not be selfish and make it about his guilt. If you want to know, he will tell you and he will be honest about it. 
"I want to be with you," his admission is made in a small voice but it doesn't hide the clarity his words have. 
Your breath hitches and you feel the soft pitter patter of your heart that you had missed when he admitted his feelings for you the first time around. 
"When does this fake relationship of yours end?" 
"A month from now."
You nod. "A month from now, take me out on a date and we will see."
Jungkook's eyes snap to yours, not having expected you to speak those words. You shoot him a small smile before getting up and leaving the room. 
—-----------------------------------------------------
SIX MONTHS LATER
"I swear to god, if you don't stay still, I'll intentionally ruin your makeup."
Your threatening low tone goes in through one ear and comes out of the other. "You could never do that."
"Don't test my limits."
A pout makes its appearance. "But that's my favourite thing to do."
You sigh in both astonishment and in love. 
How do you manage to repeat the same routine with the same man everyday and never get tired of it? Maybe it has everything to do with the way your heart keeps stuttering around this man.
No, the man sitting in front of you, is not the global superstar Jeon Jungkook. 
The man sitting in front of you is your boyfriend, Jungkook. 
The official tag on your relationship was put four months ago, after a month of going out on dates. When you say going out, you mean staying in the hybe building and arranging dates in as innovative a way as one can. 
The month in which Jungkook had to pretend to be Nikki's boyfriend only proved to you why it would have been difficult for you had you and Jungkook actually been a thing at the time. It was already painful and as petty and irrational as it may sound, it also made you jealous when you would see articles of the two of them. You're not quite sure how humilated you would have felt if you two were to be dating at the time and to see people comment on how they are a match made in heaven.
That one month, for Jungkook, was a mix of everything. The beginning of the month came with constant doubts and shame where he wondered what he should do when the month is up. He wanted you but he didn't really think he deserved you. But then he had to make up his mind; he made a mistake and he always acknowledged that but it would be so incredibly foolish if he were to let that stop him from being with you. After a week or so, he had made up his mind. He messed up, but boy if he wasn't going to make up for it.  
That whole month was spent with him brainstorming ideas on how he can show his sincerity and be a better man. Somewhere along the line, he had opened up to Niki about it and there's just a hundred percent chance that if he's smiling wide in one of those paparazzi pictures, he's talking about you.
Jungkook has been nothing but the best boyfriend you could have ever asked for. Any hurt or doubt was washed away soon after the both of you started going out. Being with Jungkook was so much more than you could have ever imagined. 
A month after being together, you were back as Jungkook's make-up artist. It was the best way to go about it as it would keep the both of you away from suspicious eyes and give the both of you ample amount of time to spend with each other. 
You both are aware that at some point, you'd have to inform the agency of the nature of your relationship as that'd be better than them finding it out from other sources. You're not quite sure what would be left of your job, but Jungkook seems quite sure that you won't be fired and that the members together, would somehow manage the higher authorities to make their rules more flexible. 
Jungkook isn't worried about the consequences with hybe, but he still finds himself stressing about the day the news becomes public. That is where you reassure him, that whatever happens, you both will get through it, together. You also remind him to not fret about it too much, because there's a long way to go before things are made public. For the time being, it's just the two of you. 
"No wait, that's actually my second favourite thing," Jungkook corrects himself. "My top favourite might just be kissing you."
You fight the blush trying to make an appearance and ask, "might?"
"The last time you kissed me was ten minutes ago. Forgive me for forgetting what it was like to be kissed by you."
As cute and adorable as Jeon Jungkook might be in front of the cameras, you have recently learned that he's just as sly and playful when he wants to be. 
"Will you stay still if I kiss you?" 
"Kiss me first and then you shall have your answer." 
So you do. 
Your soft lips are welcomed eagerly by his and they move against each other, tenderly without a hint of rush. Your breaths mingle and soft sighs escape as your hands get tangled in his hair. 
When you part, there's only a hair's gap between the two of you, "So what's the verdict?" 
Jungkook's doe eyes appear dazed as he looks at you. "Well my brain has turned into a mush, so you can totally expect me to stay still."
You giggle and the sound of it warms Jungkook's heart like nothing ever has. 
------------------------------------------------------------
A/N: i was so anxious about making this so long especially the Taehyung part but then the Taehyung part is something that happened to me irl, so i also just wanted it to be as real as possible. For Jimin, it just didn't feel right for the reader to agree to go out or be with Jimin without him earning it. But then, it also didn't quite fit in this reaction thing, if that makes sense? If y'all want some good ol' grovelling from this Jimin in a one-shot i will see what I can come up with 😉.
That being said, let me know what you thought of this! (This really was a lot of work, so your words would be greatest source of encouragement and achievement for me). Also, if you like my work and wish to have access to all my works before anyone else, here's my patreon!
Hope you enjoyed reading this!
464 notes · View notes
4joonkookie · 1 year
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And somewhere out there, a soft stan lost their wings 🦋
This Yoongi is coming for me in my nightmares and I can’t wait 🔥
Not even the possibility of Taeconda flopping freely in the wind behind him can peel my eyes away 👀
301 notes · View notes
jungkook97 · 2 years
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why didn’t you wait for me? ;; jjk
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pairing + characters: jungkook x female reader, taehyung and hobi word count: 10k ⭐️  rating: 17+ (for cursing mostly)
genre/warnings: childhood best friends turned strangers to enemies (!) to lovers, non idol!au, ANGST ANGST ANGST, the classic “jungkook was a nerd turned hot fuckboy” trope, some fighting and very loud confessions and lots of guilt and misunderstandings like oh my god poor jungkook :(
summary: y/n attends a wedding in hawaii with her old high school buddy taehyung for a much needed reunion. little did she realize that the last person she wanted to see would end up attending.
notes: read @taegularities’ stars behind waves and i felt very inspired! there’s no smut in this bc i suck at writing it so read that instead if you want them to fawk. 😗
© jungkook97 2022. do not repost or modify. please ask for permission to translate.
All you can do is glare at your best friend at this point. 
“Damn, it’s been a minute huh, Taehyung?” he greeted your best friend with a neck-breaking embrace. You gritted your teeth together with your arms crossed tightly, unwilling to stand up to say hello to one of the unexpected plus ones to this dinner date. 
You should’ve known, really. After all, one of your guys’ high school friends was getting married this weekend on the picturesque but tourist trap of an island Oahu and it was only a matter of time that your least favorite person would end up being here too. 
At least, Jeon Jungkook wasn’t your least favorite person forever. He was, at one point, something to you. 
Not anymore.
Taehyung licked his lips nervously as he slowly let go of one of his former water polo mates, laughing nervously while you cleared your throat loudly and obnoxiously as possible. 
You stood up slowly, completely ignoring Jungkook to give Hoseok, the other plus one, a big bear hug. You could feel his dark eyes boring into your back, but you didn’t care. You almost wanted him to be bothered. After all, he was the asshole, not you.
“Ah, it’s been a year or two for us, huh?” Hoseok beamed his infectious smile at you. He had a baby blue bucket hat on with a white tee, cargo shorts, and of course, his trusted mini shoulder bag adorned with all kinds of bright colors and toys. It fit the Hawaiian vibe, which is unsurprising due to his fashionista status.
Jung Hoseok, the popular street dancer senior who took you to prom when nobody wanted to go with you, was elated to see you, as you had been catching up with him for years after graduation. In fact, you still kept up with everybody in that little crew that Taehyung was a part of, seeing them from time to time in fun little dinners and weekend getaways. It was always a joy to see Bangtan in pairs and trios, but even then, you didn’t see a certain someone in these hangouts. Actually, Jungkook was the only one you haven’t seen since your senior year of undergrad and for a good reason.
“It has,” you grinned widely, rubbing his shoulders as he gripped you tightly, patting you on the back. “It’s so nice to see you as always,” you emphasized the last word, making sure Jungkook heard you loud and clear. Unsurprisingly, he did, prompting him to smack his lips and hands together.
“Why don’t we sit down and catch up, yeah?” he suggested, trying to meet eyes with you as you pulled away from Hoseok and turned toward his direction. 
“Yeah,” you said nonchalantly, your right hand reaching for the chair to sit right down, unwilling to give what the man wanted. You could sense Jungkook stiffening up for a millisecond before brushing it off, sitting right in front of you because of course he would. Three years of radio silence or even a small cameo in your life and now he wanted to be front and center so you can notice him.
You sat directly next to Taehyung, who heaved a sigh at the sight of you two still not speaking to one another. Grabbing the cooled apothecary glass bottle from the table, he began pouring the sparkling water amongst the group evenly.
“Look, I know you guys aren’t really on the best of terms per se—” 
“‘Best of terms’ is a very mild way of saying it,” you interrupted, taking your filled glass immediately to your lips, finally meeting eyes with him. 
There he was, sitting there staring at you back. He mostly grew out of his baby features from the last time you saw him, developing an incredibly sharp jawline and his nose no longer a prominent feature of his face. He gathered a few piercings since you last saw each other, and his black tee draped over his broad shoulders just enough to make him look much larger than before. A singular silver dog tag necklace dangled from his neck as he pulled his right arm up to rub his neck, revealing an entire tattoo sleeve that probably took weeks to complete.
Frankly, the man looked like he quite literally leaned into his fuckboy image much to your dismay. You still remembered that big doe-eyed little kid from years ago who couldn’t say a single word to pretty women without stumbling his words and would play Overwatch for hours, wearing the oversized white tee, blue jeans and Timberlands combo for months on end. He was a big dork from what you remember growing up, and the full 180 of an image was giving you whiplash and major disappointment. 
It only took one semester in undergrad and a dare from Jimin for him to join a fraternity when he grew up fast, dressed fashionably and started to gain a body count quickly. To this day, you still hated Jimin for that, despite him being your favorite party friend all during your college years and into young adulthood. It wasn’t that you wanted Jungkook to stay an innocent baby forever, but shit, did you really have to completely lose him to the frat boy club? It was like losing a parent. 
It wasn’t entirely Jimin’s fault though. After all, he wasn’t the one who abandoned you at your lowest point in your life.
Was it petty for you to be angry at him for this long? Perhaps. However, Jungkook didn’t help his case. It wasn’t just that he wasn’t there one time for you, he completely disappeared from your life with no explanation. Rather than spending late nights talking to Jungkook about your struggles of finding a job post graduation or healing from your four-year whirlwind of a committed relationship turned engagement turned absolute shit, you found solace in Taehyung instead. 
Rather, he was too busy with his new lifestyle, going to endless raves and getting shit-faced drunk with absolute strangers every spring break even after graduation. He became a much different person, an empty shell of who he was before. It irked you awfully knowing that, as you could never comprehend why anybody having that bright of a future just waste their time getting blasted and forgetting the entire world around them. It was selfish and immature, something you never thought would end up describing Jungkook in his early twenties. 
The only times you got updates on Jungkook was through the Bangtan men during your trips with them as they spoke about him in amusing anecdotes. You found out about his first big boy job, his first serious partner and eventual breakup, and a bunch of other milestones that you weren’t a part of.
Like it really mattered to you. He wasn’t there for your milestones either. Not that you had many besides graduation and a retracted marriage proposal. 
And so the four of you ate with not much fanfare or drama, exchanging funny stories with each other that had happened in the past year. You two didn’t say many words to one another, only acknowledging each other’s presence by a hum and a nod, directing your guys’ attention to Taehyung and Hoseok. You could still feel Jungkook’s eyes gazing at you from time to time to check your reactions to certain things. He was testing the waters, wary of when to speak, say something to you or even address anything for that matter.
As everyone departed from the cafe, Jungkook pulled his black raven hair back to put on his Louis Vuitton shades, extruding an effortless coolness to him. You rolled your eyes at it, following him. In a predictable chain of events, he slowed down his walking pace to match yours, walking side to side as Hoseok and Taehyung were a full ten steps ahead of you two. 
After a while, he finally broke the silence.
“You seem better these days.”
You scoffed. 
“Yeah, I had to figure that out without you, remember?”
Jungkook groaned, putting his hands on his hips as you two finally reached the grandiose hotel lobby.
“Are you really going to hold that over me forever? It’s been three years.”
“It’s not just three regular years, Kook,” you leaned in to push the elevator button. “My ex-fianceé cheated on me, got kicked out from my own place and lost a shit ton of friends, you being one of them.” 
You crossed your arms once more, looking up towards your former childhood best friend. He had pulled his sunglasses off and folded them on his collar, his expression dark and reminiscing on those lost three years. He stepped into the elevator with you after. It was empty with only the two of you in it. It was a long ride up as Taehyung booked the second biggest suite for the week. 
“I was busy,” he said simply. Those three simple words were incredibly loaded, harboring a kind of energy you couldn’t quite place. Anger? Resentment? Bitterness? You couldn’t make it make sense for you. 
You laughed mockingly. Busy? Wasting your life away is being busy?
“Yeah, weren’t we all? You weren’t the only one juggling everything, you know. Like…” Should you say it? “Like, you weren’t there. You were too busy screwing the whole campus and the entire Caribbean to care.”
You were getting heated, breathing more shallow with every word you spoke. Jungkook’s tongue poked against his cheek in annoyance as he leaned against the railing of the elevator. His wary but friendly demeanor was gone, replaced with the asshole you last remembered. 
“I wasn’t fucking everyone,” he defended himself. “I was networking.”
“Is that what you fuckboys call it nowadays?” 
“Stop before you start saying shit you’re going to regret,” Jungkook threatened. 
With the distant humming of the island elevator music, you continued. You didn’t care. You had to say your piece.
“You really think you’re hot shit,” you cursed with a resentful smile on your face. The three years were cycling in your mind at rapid speed, compounded by your strong emotions about the matter. “You joined one fraternity over a dare, wore some hypebeast clothes, fucked a lot of bitches and somehow, that got you out here thinking you’re the fucking man. Well newsflash: you’re not. You’re not shit, Jungkook. You don’t even give a shit about your own friends going through shit.”
He closed his eyes, grinding his teeth.
“Stop. Now,” he growled.
You stood right in front of him, eyes leveled with his closed ones. His eyes were shaking inside from all the anger. Good, you thought. You wanted him to feel as angry as you have been for the past few years. 
“What would you be if Jimin didn’t dare you that night? Where the fuck would you be now, Kook?”
He laughed bitterly, opening his eyes slowly to see yours. You could see the venom coming out of them and he was absolutely sick of you. 
“You know what it sounds like?”
You pursed your lips. 
“What?”
“It sounds like you’re jealous that I was fucking everybody but you.”
Ding.
“Fuck you, Jungkook.”
You left the elevator immediately, dizzy from the heated conversation. You couldn’t believe the words that came out of the fucker’s mouth. It was expected though, after all he has become a version of those e-boys you two used to make fun of. He made a promise he would never be like that no matter how much he glowed up.
What a bunch of shit that was.
“Can we leave the two of you alone for 3 seconds without you guys looking like you want to kill each other?” Taehyung exasperatedly exclaimed as the both of you arrived at the suite. It was up to Taehyung’s taste with dark oak wood finishes all throughout the unit, complete with a full kitchen and a spacious living room fit for at least ten people comfortably. 
With the wind blowing through the lightly sheer white curtains, you walked past your best friend in contempt to go towards the balcony for some fresh air.
All you wanted was some time off. It was a rough time at your job as you were struggling to make the stupid metrics the company was giving you, and were desperately anticipating this Hawaii trip for weeks. Just as you thought the vacation was going to be perfect, the person you grew to resent so deeply would appear in your life again. It was as if you couldn’t catch a break and the endless cycle of bullshit just continued on like some sick joke. 
As you look at the beautiful sunset unfolding in front of you being enveloped in all shades of purple, orange and pink, you close your eyes with some tears on the creases of them. You exhaled deeply to relieve the pent up energy, your sore and tense muscles relaxing. You deserved this more than anybody else on this trip and you knew it in your heart. No one was going to prevent you from having a good time, not even Jeon Jungkook and his stupid fuckboy face.
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“It sounds like you’re jealous that I was fucking everybody but you.”
Those words continued to echo in your mind for the next few days as the four of you made a mark through the whole island, eating and partying your way through. There was joy and laughter for the most part, but there was still a lot of stonewalling and ignoring from both parties, only acknowledging each other when it was necessary. You half expected Jungkook to apologize for his extremely incorrect assessment, but he didn’t bring it up to you or anybody for that matter. It was as if it never happened. Typical of a fuckboy. 
You were successfully pretending Jungkook didn’t exist for the most part, spending more time with the other two and leaving him in the dust. Jungkook did the same, occasionally disappearing for thirty minutes on your guys’ night outs. All of you assumed he was probably working his tongue, fingers and his dick in someone, local or visiting. You caught a couple of glimpses of him sleazily dancing with someone else or buying someone a drink, only hastily looking away and chugging yet another mai tai to forget about it. 
You could sworn though, Jungkook seemed to enjoy it, almost digging his words in your skull through his actions with a glance he gave whenever you caught so much as him flirting with someone you knew he would be railing minutes after. It was a mild annoyance to say the least. If there was one thing you two had in common, it was being extremely petty. 
It wasn’t that you thought Jungkook was unfuckable. He wasn’t ugly by any means; he was that kid in your guys’ friend group who was more of a late bloomer. You knew he was going to grow into his features eventually, growing taller and wider as he worked out regularly. And when he began to give a fuck about his body and looks, he was at his most dangerous at that point, only for you to already be deeply involved in your ex-fianceé at the time. Perhaps it was impeccable timing that you were taken because God only knows what would’ve happened if you two were still close and very much single. 
Was there tension between the both of you? Of course. Neither of you wanted to admit it, especially after he joined the college’s water polo team after you joked that he could never rebrand himself as a jock. After all, he was still playing MapleStory and watching Marvel movies like it’s his religion. How can he possibly scrub all of that away so easily?
It ended up working for him of course, as it does with everything Jungkook does. He was the golden maknae, just capable of anything he set his mind to. It was all the more frustrating that he took his brains and talent into the gutter by his senior year of undergrad, partying his life away with people who didn’t end up caring for him. It was only recently when he returned back to Bangtan, also trying to make up for lost time. 
The boys forgave him with open arms of course. You, on the other hand, couldn’t be on the same page. 
A change of scenery had to happen and soon enough, Hoseok suggested a light hike. Since the hotel was by the shore, you guys figured to go on a little walk for some scenic photos for Instagram and to bask in nature. 
Of course, it was ill-timed as you were extremely hungover and dehydrated from the night before, body aching from God knows what. It was high noon when it happened when you started to slow down compared to the others’ brisk walks down the perfectly easy paved trail, feeling unbearably hot. You knew it was 100% you when it wasn’t that bad earlier as the humidity caught up to you. Beads formed into light drips of sweat on your face as you found yourself heaving, feeling light. It wasn’t looking too good, your vision was blurry.
“Hey.”
You felt a tight grip around your waist as you looked up dazed looking at a broad shouldered silhouette of a man. You knew who it was immediately, pushing him away with little strength you had left.
“No, leave me the fuck alone, Kook,” you urged, your legs starting to feel like pudding. You would rather pass out at this point than have Jungkook help you in any capacity, but your body was giving out, leaning against his built frame.
“You’re going to pass out,” he sighed, grabbing onto you tighter, his biceps rock solid against your waist, pushing you toward a nearby bench to sit down. “Did you not bring any water?”
“Hoseok said it wasn’t a super long trail,” you said meekly as Jungkook pulled a portable fan out and held it by your face. The cool air comforted you almost immediately as he pushed the fan into your hand before pulling out his stainless steel tumbler and uncapping it, offering you a swig of his water. “Ew no, I don’t know where that’s been.”
Jungkook sighed deeply, pushing the top of the tumbler toward your lips.
“Stop being stubborn and drink.”
You obliged, taking three full gulps. He cupped his hand underneath your chin to catch the excess water while steadying the flow of iced water down your mouth with his other hand. When you were done, he patted the excess water he caught on your forehead to cool you down more before patting and massaging your back to help you breathe. 
It was nice. You two gazed into each other’s eyes once again and you could see the worry etched in his furrowed eyebrows, his lips sulking. You couldn’t help but to feel a pit in your stomach at his genuineness, something you haven’t really seen in a while coming from him. It was as if the old Jungkook was still lingering in there somewhere, still caring. His touch was hesitant and awkward, as if he wasn’t sure how to touch you. He didn’t want to come off too strong or have you miscode his actions. It was the most intimate you two had ever been in a while, and it wasn’t laced with any sexual intentions, a stark contrast to what you were seeing and hearing him to do other women in the past few years.
“Better?”
His tongue was dancing along with his lip ring when you patted his back to indicate you felt better. He nodded, pulling you up with one arm slowly, not letting go. 
“Let me carry you back,” he suggested, turning his back against you and bending back, his arms extended behind his back and beckoning for you to hop on. Without much arguing, you climbed on, your arms tightly wrapped around his neck as he grabbed your thighs tightly, pushing you up and straightening himself out. You were too tired to argue at this point, and desperately just wanted to go home. 
With your head against the top of his shoulder blades, he took you home without much conversation, humming quietly to himself as onlookers passed by and gushed at his charitable deed. You cringed a bit at the glimpses of other women enamored by him, almost regretting the choice you just made. It was inescapable how much women just love Jungkook, and how easy they just fall for his looks and charisma. If only they saw his pimpled face at seventeen, yelling at a computer screen when his team lost on Overwatch—
Stop it. Jungkook grew up. Why can’t you just admit that to yourself? He wasn’t that kid anymore, he had grown into a very attractive twenty something. 
I just can’t. 
Maybe I was jealous.
It didn’t take long before you dozed off on his back, only realizing it when you finally woke up in your bed, sheets spread out underneath you. With the fan whirring softly in the background, you groaned and stretched out your whole back, cracking every inch of the way. With your eyes focusing, you slowly got up to sit, realizing that there was someone else in the room.
There Jungkook was, manspreading on the lone eggshell colored barrel chair feet away from you underneath a blanket. He had put some of your clothes on the side for him to sit down, apparently to monitor your wellbeing, but ended up dozing off into a light nap. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, but you pushed that down so deep somewhere else, pushing yourself off the bed to see anybody else was still around, just anyone. It didn’t take long for you to realize the two of you alone, and after checking your phone, Taehyung and Hoseok were already off to dinner somewhere else without extending the invite to either of you.
It felt like a setup. Perhaps they devised this plan to leave you two alone for you to make up, but this also opened some avenues you didn’t want to explore, especially knowing the track record of Jungkook being alone with any woman. It wasn’t that you didn’t feel safe around him, but if there was anything that was consistent in your life right now, it was the fact that anything could very much happen.
“You feel better?” 
Jungkook’s voice echoed in the empty space that was the living room. You turned around, sheepishly grabbing your own arm to comfort yourself from the sheer panic that you were spending an awful amount of time alone with him. 
“Yeah. Just hungry though.”
His slippers skidded through the floor as he entered the room, wearing yet another dark oversized tee and matching shorts. You could feel your heart pounding in your throat as you two met each other’s gazes. His was a lot softer compared to when you two last spoke, his walls had disintegrated and his presence felt very familiar to you once again, like specks of old Jungkook was peeking through. 
The caring, soft-spoken and attentive side of him was ringing in your head for the past ten minutes, your brain trying to make sense of it all. This whole time you thought that side of him was long gone and had been replaced with someone else completely but alas, he was right in front of you, just older. 
You missed him. You missed that Jungkook deeply.
Before you could say something stupid, he opened his mouth. 
“You wanna eat at that buffet downstairs?”
You nodded.
“Yeah, why not?”
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You were unraveling. It was definitely a result of the combination of the quiet sexual tension between the two of you all week and the whiplash of the Jungkook you once knew making a reappearance that you feeling a certain type of way. You found your eyes lingering too long at his back while waiting in line for some steak at the meat station. He seemed rather oblivious by you checking him out fully, fully fixated on the spread of meat before him. 
You could still feel his back against your cheeks and how formidable his neck felt with your arms slung around his neck. The absolute comfort you felt, the security of knowing he was very capable of taking you home safe and sound. It didn’t fully hit you at the time, but you realized how much you missed him, the real him. 
After stealing a few more glances from across the table, you finally saw a moment to finally speak your piece after the events from earlier today. 
“Um, hope this doesn’t sound weird in any way, but I just want to thank you for taking me home earlier. That was very sweet of you.”
Jungkook looked up from his mountainous plate food, cheeks filled with meat. He stopped in mid chew, his big brown doe eyes looking back at you in surprise. He was absolutely adorable.
“Mmm, of course,” he mumbled his words before drowning the contents down with some wine. Clearing his throat, he looked down and continued picking at his food with a fork. “I couldn’t leave you there, Taehyung would quite literally kill me.”
You smiled, first time in his presence in a while.
“Yeah, he really would.” 
His lips formed into a small soft grin as well, stabbing a cherry tomato right in the middle before gobbling it up. 
The two of you kept eating, grabbing more plates of food. Eventually, conversation soon sparked up, and you found yourself finally speaking to him normally just like old times. It felt as if time didn’t pass at all and the negative feelings surrounding the both of you existed in a different alternative universe. It wasn’t that you actively forgot, but you realized that being petty wasn’t going to get anywhere at this point. It was clear you two had moved on and no longer wanted to keep it up anymore.
After your third drink and a few more laughs, it grew a bit quiet. As Jungkook finished the remaining pieces of his dessert, he put his small spoon down as it clinked against the ceramic bowl. Pensive, his mind was thinking about something for a while based on your observation, and you knew it was on the tip of his tongue. 
He sat up, straightening his back before saying his piece as well.
“I know we haven’t been kind to each other this whole trip and I just wanna say…I’m really sorry for what I said earlier. I was being incredibly immature, and I regretted saying that.”
Your tongue swirled inside your mouth at his sudden apology as your fork clashed against your own plate after it got loose from your hand. This whole time you felt that Jungkook was being firm in his words and was convincing you that he was right, but in actuality he was remorseful the whole time. 
If he wasn’t enjoying rubbing his sexual activeness in front of you, then what was actually happening then?
You gulped at the thought, replaying all of those moments in your mind. Surely, everyone assumed Jungkook’s disappearances were hookups for him and you assumed this based on the couple of times you caught him flirting with someone. Weirdly enough, he wasn’t fully attentive towards the girl in question in both instances, always catching you watching him as he stared at you back, seemingly…melancholic. Like he wanted to be somewhere else. With someone else. 
Was that someone else you? 
You shook away those thoughts. There was no way he was pining for you this entire time. If he did, he would’ve said something when you were engaged for two years to who you thought was the love of your life. You two were just childhood close friends and nothing more. 
“It’s okay, Kook,” you finally answered after some time, not realizing you were this deep in thought. “I’m sorry for saying all of that too. Like yeah I was hurt, but I’m not gonna be mad at you for spreading your wings, you know?” 
The past was the past. It was clear to you in the past few hours that Jungkook may look different and have a complete 180 of a lifestyle now, there were still parts of Jungkook you remembered and cherished within him (although it took a while for that guy to come out). Perhaps he was lost during those three years like you were, trying to understand and grasp the world as much as possible with his young adult hands. Now that his life was less chaotic, he can regain some of that old him back, just like you have been healing from your own traumas the past three years through this trip.
“Yeah…” was all Jungkook could say, leaning back against the cooled leather booth with his arm sprawled across it. He was thinking about something once again, eyes dark. You could feel it hovering over you, and perhaps that was what Jungkook wanted to do as well. 
Or at least, you were hoping that he felt that way. 
After stacking the plates up, you two went back to the suite, making light conversation here and there. The gap between the two of you was decreasing as you touched shoulders with him, not being bothered about it one bit. 
“See, I told you they’d make up,” Hoseok quipped to Taehyung with a big fat grin on his face, amused as you came into the living room with Jungkook trailing behind.
You laughed a bit, cheeks flushing a light pink. 
“Spoiler alert: we are capable of forgiving.” 
“It took a while,” Jungkook piped up, plopping against the big sectional next to you. He looked small against it and a part of you ached to sit next to him as his eyes beckoned you to do so. “Anyway, what are we doing right now?”
“Drinking,” Taehyung said simply, giving Jungkook a glass immediately. “We are exposing ourselves tonight.”
You froze. You participated in this game for quite some time now everytime you were with the Bangtan boys and have witnessed and told all kinds of wild confessions and stories. Normally you would be more than happy to join, but in lieu of your recent feelings blooming rapidly for your childhood best friend, you would rather not partake in such activity.
“Uh…” you trailed off, mind scrambling to come up with an excuse. Taehyung raised his eyebrow in enjoyment, taking a sip of wine before crossing his legs graciously like a prince of sorts. 
“You’re not joining us?” he hummed, chuckling to himself. He knew you better than everyone else: if you weren’t participating, it’s because you were hiding something. 
“No, I’m tired. You know, from heat exhaustion and whatnot,” you lied.
Hoseok snickered, leaning on Taehyung to whisper something to him. You squinted your eyes. 
This was deliberate. Very deliberate. They knew something. 
After a while, they separated, both nodding to each other. Hoseok waved you away, leaning against the chair. 
“Fine, have a good sleep.”
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It wasn’t a good sleep. In fact, you spent the last two hours just staring at the ceiling, brain just going through all kinds of emotions at a million miles per hour. It felt nonstop and endless as you plopped yourself up, sighing into the dark abyss. Your vacation was ending and you weren’t looking forward to going back to reality. 
It didn’t help that it was humid and hot at 2AM, and you were extremely dehydrated once more. Sliding on some slippers, you made your trek toward the kitchen. 
As expected, the boys were still in the living room conversing. There were at least 3 empty wine bottles now, with the fourth one being poured by Jungkook himself. You sauntered into the kitchen, your hands reaching for a cup on the top cabinet before slinking toward the cooled stainless steel fridge. As the water light tinged a light blue while water was being dispersed, your ears caught a bit of the topic in question. 
“Yah, I didn’t realize that my love life is that sad,” Taehyung laughed acridly. “Like, am I really incapable of keeping someone interested?”
You snorted to yourself, knowing the answer. Taehyung was the worst at commitment out of all of them. 
“I can’t speak for you buddy,” Hoseok smacked his lips together. “You kind of messed up with Jennie. Now she’s back with that guy now, huh?”
“Don’t remind me of it please.” 
All three of them laughed heartily. 
You began downing the water, turning around toward them. Jungkook’s body was facing you, although you were sure he couldn’t see you from the very faint glow of the countertops. He was incredibly drunk and stretched out on the sectional, scrolling through his phone as Taehyung and Hoseok were in their own worlds sitting on the floor. 
“Yah, Jungkook,” Hoseok beckoned. 
“What?”
“Have you ever been in love before? I feel like you haven’t.”
Your heart started to thump wildly in your own chest as you did your best not to choke from the water. They would ask this question when you’re present. 
“Ay, I have,” Jungkook defended himself, not looking up from his phone. 
“Really?” Hoseok nudged the youngest’s leg, very interested. “How many times?”
Jungkook looked up, but rather than looking at Hoseok, he looked directly at you. 
“Once.”
You cleared your throat, eyes immediately down toward the sink as you washed the cup furiously before putting it on the washing rack. The other two looked over as well, realizing you were awake the whole time. Before any of them could speak, you were already back in your room, deep in your sheets as you muffled your screams. 
There was no way. You’re simply imagining things. 
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“Once.” 
“Ay wake up girl, the wedding is in a few hours!” Hoseok’s sing-song voice chimed through the air as he pulled the curtains wide open. Your brain was frazzled as he started to shake you playfully awake, the room filled with his infectious laughter. 
You felt weird. Surely, you were well rested after the events from yesterday, but you could’ve sworn something happened last night that you couldn’t place what it was. Your dream consisted of a snapshot of the week thus far but convoluted, and you found yourself unsure. One of the dreams you had was Jungkook confessing he was in love with you to Hoseok and Taehyung, but for some reason, that felt extremely vivid to you. 
You slowly got up and began your morning routine as a whiff of toasted bread, bacon, and eggs filled the air. Hoseok was making his infamous toast for everybody, humming an unknown but catchy tune as he did so. 
“Morning my dear,” he said sweetly as you made your way to the kitchen. The glass you left last night disappeared, meaning that memory you had last night was fabricated. You exhaled deeply, relieved before taking a seat on the kitchen island.
Taehyung came out from his quarters shortly after, his brown permed hair still in disarray as he yawned loudly and stretched his body out for everyone to see.
“Man, we drank so much last night,” he commented, pointing to the five empty wine bottles perched on the counter. “What time did we sleep last night?”
“Don’t know,” Hoseok chimed, plopping the scrambled eggs neatly on one of the plates of buttered toast before handing him an opened jar of blueberry jam. “Jungkookie drank the most too and he’s still not awake yet.”
You look toward the direction of Taehyung and Jungkook’s room to see it still half ajar. Loud snoring was emitting from the room itself, indicating the youngest was dead asleep. 
“I’ll go wake him up,” you piped up, slipping off of the chair and making your way toward the room. Pushing the door back, you saw Jungkook’s head popping out from sheets as he continued to snore loudly into the AM hours. 
Slowly making your way to the bed, you sat on the edge of the bed, leaning in to start lightly shaking him awake.
“Kook, wake up.”
He stopped mid-snore, breathing sharply before beginning to pull the sheets off of—
Jungkook was naked. Very naked. 
You stood up immediately, your eyes widened at the realization that he was starting to peel off the sheets below his shoulders, exposing his upper chiseled body. He was murmuring complete nonsense in his sleep as his eyes were circling around in its sockets, waking up. You found yourself panicking, heat rising to your face as he began pushing the sheets even lower. 
No. Not today. 
Before you would see more, you turned around quickly and shut the door aggressively, making a beeline towards the kitchen island again. 
Hoseok noticed your change in demeanor immediately as your butt slammed on the chair cushion, your eyes glued to the plate in front of you. 
“Hey, are you okay?”
“Y-yeah,” you blatantly lied, picking up a fork and not looking at Hoseok or anybody for that matter. Pushing your fork into the toast in one hand and cutting up the toast in another, you were doing your best to keep it together and not replaying Jungkook’s buff chest in your mind or a flash of his well defined abs or whatever else you saw in a split second. Hell, you were sure you saw more, but you were too stunned to speak. Why you forgot that Jungkook slept naked was beyond you. You knew this about him and walked into that completely oblivious about it.
It didn’t take long for Jungkook to find clothes, wearing a fresh set of pajamas, this time a dark green see-through one out of all choices. He sat down next to you with a delivery of Hope Toast from Hoseok himself right away. 
“Morning,” Jungkook greeted with the most groggiest voice, eyes blinking several times in the attempt to stay awake. He seemed oblivious to the interaction you two had earlier, unaware that you saw 80% of his bare body. 
“Look at you being a total rockstar,” Hoseok complimented, in awe of his cool pajamas. 
You, on the other hand, were not having a great time. His tattoo sleeve was all the way up to the top of his shoulders, peeking through in great detail through the holes. Your brain was able to delete the holes altogether, seeing the full picture in 4K. You could see his little black boxers underneath in the corner of your eye, tightly wrapped around his massive thighs. 
If you weren’t noticing his body before, you were extremely distracted by it by now. The silence wasn’t helping either. 
“I’m going to make some juice,” you broke the silence and got up, trying to not look Jungkook in the eye. Pulling the juicer from the pantry and the fruits from the fridge. “Who wants some?”
“Me,” Hoseok and Jungkook replied at the same time. 
You began cutting up the fruits and began loading into the machine. With whatever energy you had left over, you began pushing the stick down the chamber and the frustration you had toward Jungkook. With every push, you were attempting to erase all the pent up tension away to no avail, still remembering his glances and genuine attentiveness and kindness and—
There was a bit of resistance, no, a lot of resistance. Your eyebrows knitted together as you pulled the stick up and looked inside. The orange slices you had cut up were lodged deeply in there, caught right in the middle of the dividers. You groaned, trying to fish out the contents with a nearby utensil before pathetically pushing the stick down one more in an effort to clear it.
After a few moments of struggling, you heard someone moving from their seat and heading toward you to assist you.
“Thank—”
Jungkook’s arms popped up from either side of you as both of his hands grabbed the top of yours holding the stick. He was incredibly close to you, his sturdy and buff body pressed up against yours as he grunted repeatedly in your left ear to push the contents down for you. You felt every hot breath of his, as you struggled to find your own. It felt like you two were in an embrace as your brain went to space yet again, not even catching a single break from quite literally five minutes earlier.
The slices gave way and broke apart with his strength alone as you found yourself flushing madly at the amount of contact Jungkook was initiating without warning. He must know what he was doing, otherwise it didn’t compute for you. It was one thing you saw him grow confident in making moves, but another to actually experience it yourself. 
No wonder girls fell at his feet now. Jungkook is incredibly dangerous. 
The whirring of the juicer droned on as you two finished the last few slices, generating more than enough juice for the three of you. You shut the machine off while he took the stick from you to clean it immediately. You turned around to see Taehyung and Hoseok whispering amongst each other before separating a millisecond after, pretending it didn’t happen, looking in opposite directions.
Shut up.
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It didn’t take long for you guys to get ready for the wedding. Well, at least for Taehyung and Hoseok anyway. Taehyung had to leave immediately after he finished his breakfast to be a part of the groomsmen (in which he reluctantly said yes for, as he hated being a part of anything that required actual work) and Hoseok had to set up the audio equipment for music. It left you and Jungkook alone again for most of the day from the ceremony itself to even sitting together at the reception. It was an open reception by the beach filled with candlelights and leis everywhere, making it a very typical but beautiful island destination wedding. 
You wore a simple YSL black dress with a heart print on it as Jungkook wore a very casual black leopard print suit. It would be a lie to say that he didn’t steal the show away, gathering a great deal of interest amongst the wedding guests. 
As the night progressed after the usual wedding moments passed, you found yourself downing a few drinks and there (open bars were great!), grooving along in your seat and eating what was left of the wedding cake that was served an hour ago. Jungkook was beaming and cheering his former water polo mates on, occasionally hollering and hooting whenever someone busted into a head spin or other ‘90s dance moves they were too young to partake in at the time of popularity. You laughed and egged them on as well, leaning against your chair as Hoseok finished up his set with Beyoncé’s “BREAK MY SOUL”. 
In the middle of it, you felt a tap against your shoulders. Looking up, you realize Jungkook was gesturing to you to come with him to dance. You smiled warmly, grabbing his hand as he navigated through the guests to the dance floor. He had taken off his jacket at this point, his white satin shirt billowing in the cool breeze as his sleeves were pushed up to his elbows to alleviate the heat. Hoseok was right; he really was a rockstar.
Just as you two began to groove along with the music, the audio was cut off unexpectedly, followed by major mic feedback that irritated the guests. 
“Ah, sorry,” Taehyung stumbled on the stage, his hand extended in apology as the other was gripping the mic rather tightly. He changed out of his formal wear for a lighter blue Hawaiian shirt and white pants, adorning 4 different leis that were put on him throughout the night and it was clear he was incredibly drunk. Not realizing he was yelling, he continued, “SORRY, I just want to dedicate this song to my man Wooshik who not only is my favorite guy in the fucking world but…” 
He exhaled, sniffling a bit.
“...you deserve a happy life and a happy wife. Congrats man.” 
Taehyung gestured to Hoseok to start the music and so he did.
The lights began to dimmer as Taehyung began his rendition of “Unchained Melody” as his deep voice echoed throughout the beach landscape. The guests who were formerly getting wild were paired up almost instantaneously, grabbing their partners to slow dance. 
You stood there in horror as Jungkook chuckled to himself, his hands on his hips.
“He would do this, that bastard,” he cursed to himself, his ears turning incredibly red. You flushed as well, not really sure of what to do. 
“We can sit back down,” you suggested, already starting to turn back towards your seat, but Jungkook grabbed your hand, pulling you toward him. He wrapped his arms around your waist as you instinctively rested your arms around his neck, mind just dizzy. 
“No, let’s dance anyway. Fuck Taehyung,” he chuckled, swinging the both of you ever so slowly to the beat. 
As the song progressed and Taehyung began to croon through the high notes to much fanfare, you found yourself slow-dancing with your childhood best friend, turned enemy, turned friends again against the backdrop of one of the most beautiful places in the entire world. As the string lights began to flicker on slowly for the ambiance, you could see the warmth in Jungkook’s eyes reflecting on the light. 
It felt like you two were teenagers again, not knowing anything else besides school and pop culture. He was your first slow dance at your middle school prom, and you could remember him and his braces grinning at you with excitement. This time, he was older, his smile was more reserved, soft and gentle as he always was with you. All the memories of you two together for the past week started to come together as you wished you had more time to spend with him, more time to laugh with each other instead of the last 48 hours. Three years felt like eternity, but this past week felt even longer than that.
“You look beautiful tonight,” Jungkook said breathlessly. Your heart skipped a beat once more. You? Beautiful? He was perfect. 
“You too,” you replied, making sure he felt the same.
He leaned closer to you and gripped you tighter. His eyes suddenly turned dark as his smile fell a bit. You looked at him with confusion, unable to piece it together. 
All the words he wanted to say were forming in his brain as it began spilling out once more.
“I’m sorry.” 
Sorry?
“I’m sorry for abandoning you…for…” he stopped for a moment, clearing his throat a bit, breath seeping in alcohol. “...for leaving you to deal with that fallout, that heartache by yourself. I was so selfish back then and I’m so sorry.” 
As Taehyung reached the highest notes, Jungkook started shaking a bit and not from the cold. He had more to say. Your stomach was bubbling with acid as you felt your throat tighten, feeling a bit sick. The drinks were catching up to you, and it was compounded by the weight of emotions you were feeling up until this point. It was being validated, but you had a sickening feeling where it was going.
🎶 And time goes by so slowly,
And time can do so much 🎶 
“You’re right. I thought I was the man, the top of the world. I thought maybe, just maybe, I would find myself, like I can change everything about me or something. And then I realized…” 
🎶 Are you still mine? 🎶
“...I realized that I just needed you.”
You felt incredibly nauseous at this point and as Taehyung kneeled to the ground behind you next to the groom and his new bride with a crowd cheering him on, you felt the need to throw up and it was definitely not on the dance floor. 
Before you knew it, Jungkook was leaning in closer to you, closing his eyes. Unfortunately, you couldn’t take it anymore. 
🎶 I need your love 🎶
You unwrapped your arms off of Jungkook’s neck and turned around immediately, eyes looking toward the nearest exit. You could feel Jungkook’s grip loosening fast as you left the dance floor almost immediately and to the outskirts of the reception. You knelt down and unloading the bile that was pushing up your throat for the past five minutes onto the clear white sand. Tears formed in your eyes as you began wiping away the fluids from your face as you continued to cough and spit toward the ground. 
The world was shifting underneath you as you stumbled back up slowly, hearing faint clapping ringing in your ears. Your mind was also swirling in the same fashion, unable to digest what just happened. 
Here you were, on the last night of your trip, slow dancing with your childhood best friend only for him to dump you a boatload of intense human emotions. Sure, you forgave him for saying those words and perhaps for the lost time, but this whole thing of him realizing his fuckboy era was a distraction from him actually missing you. You wondered if this was a huge game to him or if he was being serious. If he had feelings this whole time, why was he slipping in the middle of the night every night for the past week in the arms of other girls? Why didn’t he say anything at all while you were with your ex? You didn’t have the patience anymore to be played, and truly, Jungkook was driving you insane. 
It didn’t take long for him to find you kneeled over by the sand staring at your vomit as he called for you, asking if you were okay. He knelt down too, putting his hand on your back. You had enough. 
You finally mustered up the courage to say it.
“What…what the fuck is wrong with you?” 
“What?” 
You turned toward him, standing back up. 
“What is wrong with you? Like, what is your end goal here?”
Jungkook followed suit, his eyes flickered from your question. 
“I don’t have one.”
You grinned bitterly. 
“You…you spent the past three years disappearing off the face of the planet ‘exploring yourself’ and now you’re telling me you were actually lost and confused? And…” you stepped closer to him. “And you needed me? Needed me for fucking what?”
You scoffed, extending your arms out in frustration and confusion. Jungkook on the other hand, was making himself smaller, his hands tucked away in his pockets as he was searching for an answer himself.
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know.”
“No, I do know,” Jungkook corrected himself, inhaling sharply, his eyes everywhere else but you. He groaned in frustration, his shoulders lifting up into a shrug. “I don’t know, what the hell do you want me to say? That I fucking missed you? That I…” he swallowed, crossing his arms, “...that I wasted my early twenties away to forget you? Is that what you want me to say?”
He exhaled sharply, his eyes closing ever so slowly out of frustration. You were stunned, trying to defend yourself. 
“Well no, but—”
“But what?” he rebutted. “You think I’m this huge fuckboy with no morals or whatever, but honestly, do you wanna know where I went for the past week? I wasn’t fucking anybody, you know. I was outside at every bar we went to, angry at the fact that you spent the past week ignoring me like I was nothing to you. Like, was I really nothing to you this whole time?” 
“You…” Jungkook grimaced, biting his bottom lip. “You said you were okay with me spreading my wings, but you had no idea what I was going through, how much I longed to be with you instead of seeing you with that asshole. You wanted me to be there for you when you two finally broke it off, but fuck, I couldn’t. I had to get away and forget everything, forget about you.”
You were eerily quiet, unable to say anything. Although you chalked up his downward spiral and your engagement happening at the same time to be a pure coincidence of you two going in very different life paths, it didn’t occur to you that your engagement was the catalyst for everything else. It made sense to you.
Jungkook’s voice was trembling. 
“You know, I wasn’t even formally invited to this wedding. Taehyung asked me about being his plus one and I said no. It wasn’t until he mentioned you were coming, I finally decided to go because…I guess, I wanted to be able to tell you all of this, for you to finally take me seriously.”
You got very tense, already about to see what was going to happen. 
“Kook—” you began to interject. 
“I’m in love with you, okay?” he put his hands up in defeat. “It’s really just that. Maybe you didn’t see it before, but I always have. I just got lost in between trying to forget that I did. Can you really blame me for that?”
He started laughing indignantly, tears forming in his eyes. He knelt down soon after, hands buried in his face. He was unraveling in front of you, more vulnerable than he has ever been. You always thought Jungkook’s heart hardened after his misadventures for the past few years, but the man still wore his heart on his sleeve as he always did, still sobbing his eyes out as if it was his first heartbreak ever in his life. You wondered how long he must have felt this way, how much pain he must’ve felt when you first told him you loved that ex of yours. Self medication was never a good look on anybody, and he was the worst when it came to drinking until he forgot even before things spiraled out of control.
This whole time you felt that your worst years of your life were purposely missed by your childhood best friend, but in reality, he was suffering at the same time in a much different way. If only you knew then rather than harboring so much resentment toward him for the past three years. You accused him of being a terrible friend, but truly, you weren’t there for him either. Instead, you casted his phase as him wasting his life away. 
“Jungkook…” you called out his name softly, leaning down to his level to touch the top of his head gently, rubbing it. “I’m so sorry I didn’t see how much you were hurting yourself. I should’ve been there for you…”
It didn’t matter anymore. You couldn’t make up for the lost time and the words and actions that could’ve been said or done. If anything, you didn’t deserve him, and yet, he still wanted to be with you. Why, you wondered. 
He continued to sob loudly, hiccuping from time to time in attempts to catch his breath. Fully leaning onto you, he embraced you as you two fell into each other, not saying much. 
There were too many emotions still swirling in the air, and you didn’t want him to say more things that ached your heart more and more. The more you thought about it, the more you wanted to blame yourself for not seeing what was right in front of you the whole time. Even the words “I’m sorry” weren't cutting it anymore. You didn’t know how else to make him less hurt than just resurfacing your buried feelings for him, but even then, it wasn’t fair for him. He had years on you while you went and loved another man completely. 
Absolute silence fell between the two of you as he lifted his head up finally to meet your eyes again. He was in a lot of pain, and you couldn’t stand seeing more of it. You wanted it to go away, and you wanted him to forget all of it.
And so you leaned in and your lips touched his ever so lightly. He didn’t take long before he pushed his lips deeper into yours, sealing a deep and passionate kiss between the two of you. Your lips dance in between his as his mouth opens for you, taking you all in. You found yourself taking a light gasp before following along with the rhythm, your hands cupping the sides of his face. His arms enveloped your whole body, holding tightly as if he wasn’t going to let go anytime soon. For minutes you two were just like that, deeply exploring each other for the first time, one of the potential many times after. 
As you two slowly retracted from each other, he let go with his lips pursed together in a soft pout, his eyes still swirling in its sockets. You could tell his mind was pulling in so many different directions like yours, having a hard time fully grasping the weight of what happened. There wasn’t really much to say, and with everything unfolded the way it did, it was best to just let the moment sink in for the night and figure out what was next later. 
It didn’t take long before both of you realized that the reception had been over a while ago as there weren’t that many guests remaining and the clean up crew had arrived. You pulled yourself back up with Jungkook doing the same as well, wiping his knees clean of the specks of sand stubbornly still attached to his designer pants. 
Silently, the two of you started walking back toward the car with Hoseok and Taehyung present, faces spelling massive worry.
“Where the hell were you guys?” Taehyung interrogated, enveloping you in a towel as Hoseok gave Jungkook’s jacket back to him. “We’ve been calling you for the past fifteen minutes.”
He was right. You opened your phone to see a flurry of messages and missed phone calls from the two.
“Sorry…” was all you could muster at that point. Your mind was clearly elsewhere and you were in need of a shower and a nice warm bed. “We uh…had a bit of a serious private conversation, that’s all.” 
That was all you could really say without divulging more before pulling yourself up into the van with Jungkook following suit, seated closely next to you. The other two immediately took notice of your guys’ sudden closeness, but rather than teasing the two of you about it, stayed quiet.
“Yeah,” he agreed blankly, also not giving much away. “It was much needed.”
You two exchanged glances at each other, having so much to say but not enough time to say it. Surely, it was the beginning of a next chapter together, and frankly, both of you weren’t sure if any of you were ready for it. But truthfully, truly, who really is? 
“Well, you guys sure looked rather cozy with each other tonight,” Taehyung quipped from the passengers’ seat with the sun visor mirror fully open and on as the van took off, leaving the shore behind. He was allegedly checking out the current status of his face, but you could tell he was monitoring the two of you in the back being way too comfortable with each other. 
Jungkook couldn’t help but to return a silent smirk to himself, looking outside to the city lights. Instinctively, he grabbed your hand, intertwining his tattooed fingers with yours without much thought. 
“Of course. We’re an item now, didn’t you know?” 
- end - 
335 notes · View notes
raplinesmoon · 9 months
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whoever styled BTS at the Grammys in 2020 I hope your pillow is cold on both sides
21 notes · View notes
clutterfield · 2 years
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GHOST BUSTERS
FratBoys! BTS x Comatose! Reader
Main mlist. Previous chapter.
Synopsis
You get into a freak accident and wake up to your body surrounded by seven crying men. Or your unrequited love doesn’t seem so unrequited after all.
Chapter warnings
Implied Sex, Implied unrequited feelings, Minor cussing, Implied accident
Chapter Rating: T (For Teen Audiences and Up)
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Chapter 3: The Boys from the Tree House
FLASHBACKS
The Always HARD-y Boys 😏
Namjoon
Hyungs, did you see where YN ran off to?
Yoongi
Not really, no. Why?
Jin
Of course you wouldn't. You're busy tapping some girl again, aren't you?
Yoongi
Try walking in on YN naked before you judge me. My dick isn't going to beat its own meat ya know
Namjoon
Okay, first off. Ew, hyung. Second, we've got an exam coming up unlike some people. 🙄
Jin
Yah, weren't you just shoving your own dick down someone else's throat a few weeks ago, Joon-ah?
Namjoon
This and that are two completely opposite matters. Also, ever seen YN touching herself in the tub before?
Yoongi
WHAT
Jin
Did you at least take a fucking picture?
Namjoon
Yah, hyung. Inside my brain. 😏
Yoongi
🖕🖕🖕
Jin
Yah.
Hobi
Ayyy, what did I miss?
🔮
Noona's McD's McNaes 🍦
McTaeTae
Noonaaaaa
YNoona
What kid
Chim's Burger
What she said
Gukie Spaghetti
Yeah
McTaeTae
I feel attacked.
Anyway, since you're all here, I need you to come meet me at the rec hall chop chop!
YNoona
Uh-oh, I smell photographer Vante
Chim's Burger
You're not going to make us do another weird cosplay shit again, are you?
Gukie Spaghetti
I'm out losers
McTaeTae
🥲🥲🥲
Why are you people so mean to me?
And no. We're doing normal stuff today.
I need it to boost my final GPA.
YNoona
...If you say so, then I guess I could come over right now.
Chim's Burger
...Fine.
Gukie Spaghetti
I swear to God if you're lying, hyung
🔮
Beta Tau Sigma
Taehyung
Image sent
YNie's breasts in this corset are just fantastic, aren't they? Feel so blessed 😇😌
Read by Namjoon and 5 others
🔮
Neighbors from across the hall
Taeminie
Hey, YN! Uh, I have some friends over and they don't fit in my apartment.
Just...is it possible for some of them to stay in yours?
I promise they're really neat and organized and are not robbers so...
YNie
Oh yah! Sure no probz. Key is still under the rug.
Taeminie
Oh yay! Thanks a bunch. I'll just wire you back for whatever they use and stuff.
Also have the bill receipts out for you by mail.
Image sent
I mean they've piled up pretty much.
YNie
Woah, shit I completely forgot lmao
You know, with finals and all.
Anywho...
No! Don't do that! My uh, family tends to go through my mail before I even get them and they have no idea I even own an apartment let alone somewhere not so nice... no offense to us.
I mean that's all I can afford so...
Yeah.
I'll just come over to pick them up tomorrow so can you keep them for now?
Taeminie
Oh! Oh, right! Right of course.
And not offended.
Our place is a fucking pig sty.
Not to worry, I'll definitely keep our dirty little secret a secret 🤭
YNie
Thanks, Taeminie! You're the bestest neighbor a girl could hope for.
I'll def bring you some of your favorite cereals as thanks for putting up with my drunken ass last week.
Taeminie
Yeah about that. Whoever those men are, they don't deserve your love, babe.
Haven't met them yet but I know they're grade A assholes even if they're your best friends.
I mean who the fuck ditches movie night with a beautiful girl like you for a horny one night stand?
Definitely won't be me. 😤
YNie
🥹🥹🥹
Aw thanks, Tae. That's so sweet.
At least they're not having sex inside the house.
That shit will hurt me even more.
Taeminie
...Are you maybe free tonight? Come down here earlier. Maybe we need to have another talk, love.
Self worth and all that jazz.
Because clearly you need to be reminded that you are a wonderful, gorgeous, human being.
YNie
Yes, please 🥹🥹🥹
🔮
Beta Tau Sigma
Yoongi
Hey, did YN come home yet?
Hoseok
Same question
Jin
Why? Finally ditched your women for her have you? 😏
Namjoon
Strange. I had my last class after hers so she should be here before me.
Jeongguk
Her car isn't in the garage?
Jimin
Wdym?!
Taehyung
Hey funny story. I think I just saw another Bentley right by Highway 54 ten minutes ago. Looked like YN's car?
And here I thought we gave her the and I quote "only one of its kind" edition? 🧐
Yoongi
What.
And yes, hyungie. It's movie night tonight, why wouldn't we not stop thinking with our god damn cocks for once?
Say that again Taehyung-ah?
Namjoon
Did you at least get the license plate?
Taehyung
Yeah, it's YN-0613...13...Hey wait
Hoseok
Isn't that YN's license plate????
Read by Jimin and 5 others
...where'd all of you go--guys?!!!
🔮
Yoongi curses as he scours the University's CCTV (he had befriended the guards with the amount of hours he spends inside the music studio and now he was privy to every recorded footage, yes even that one drunken mistake where Namjoon railed a chick in the library after hours), sharp eyesight staring at every car passing through the blurry screen.
His hair is so disheveled, lips bitten so roughly one would think he spent his time eating pussy when all he could think of was fucking finding you.
It was goddamned three in the fucking morning and you have yet to respond to all of their texts and miscalls.
Were you even alive godammit?!
You're usually not one to leave them hanging for anything so this behavior was a little bit worrying.
So help him if you were fornicating with some guy who wasn't pre-approved by him and the others---
He grits his teeth, blood boiling just at the thought of you fucking someone else for reasons he didn't want to dwell on.
Yet.
The rest of his brothers are nervously watching every little movement trying to just see if they could spot anything that would give an indication as to where you went exactly.
Only to be sorely disappointed when they spend a fruitless search leading them back home to wait for you.
But you don't show up until the very next day, grumpy and seated on a lonely bench inside the cafeteria while women instantly flock towards them before they could even get to you at that point.
And then you up and leave just as the youngest three manage to break the crowd that had formed and run after you...
Only, it was too late as they don't find you anywhere.
Next thing they know, your accident spreads around the school like wildfire, damaging the only peace that Bangtan Sonyeondan has protected at all costs.
Next chapter
126 notes · View notes
curryshesus · 6 months
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bts fics that radiate sheer utter brilliance
(aka my favorite fics of all time) pt. 1
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hello, hello! please make sure to show your love and support to these lovely authors if you enjoyed any of these reads as much as i did <3 note: all of these fics contain nsfw content (minors dni please). enjoy!
➺ the road to you - by @bonvoyagenoona
| ot7 x reader (tae focus) | 110k
au of all aus, best friend!taehyung, high school boyfriend!jimin, professor!yoongi, college boyfriend!jungkook, art enthusiast and city heartthrob!namjoon, barista!hobi, actor!jin, angst, fluff, smut, series
>>summary: "armed with your quick wit, creative passion, talent for storytelling, and innate understanding of your fanbase, you have met every challenge, surpassed every goal, and achieved the unimaginable. despite the earth shifting erratically under your firmly planted feet, you’ve always had a plan. you’ve made peace with the sacrifices you’ve had to make, and you’ve long forgotten the rejections and heartbreaks that came as a result. your agent keeps reminding you that you’re at the precipice of something new, that your audience is waiting for your next project with bated breath. this is usually when you thrive. so why do you feel so lost? and who can you count on from your past to help you find your way?"
➺ matilda - by @babystrcandy
| yoongi x reader | 141.8k
brother’s best friend au, f2e2f2l, slice of life, angst, fluff, eventual smut, series
>> summary: "loneliness had always been a constant for you, haunting you like a ghost; until your older brother’s best friend, min yoongi, came into your life. you both promised each other something back then - you’d always have his support and he’d always have yours. but with time and age, you weren’t sure how much that all still stood to be true."
➺ bitchin' - by @kinktae
| jungkook x reader | 49.5k
1980’s au, inspired by to all the boys i’ve loved before, e2l, fake lovers/college au, frat boy!jungkook, smut, series
>> summary: "the 80s were a time of choices. which perm was right for you? what color neon would you wear next? none of these choices, however, were more questionable than a certain deal you made with jeon jungkook."
➺ flower - by @readyplayerhobi
| hoseok x reader |
online dating au, fluff, future angst, future smut, series
>> summary: "you finally decide to take a dip into the world of online dating and find the flower dating app. one of the top matches for you proves to be a guy who looks to be your complete opposite; tattooed, pierced, a metalhead and oh…incredibly handsome. what happens when you throw caution to the wind and reach out to him?
➺ suncity - by @jamaisjoons
| hoseok x reader | 17k
strangers to lovers au, vacation au, angst, fluff, smut, oneshot
>> summary: "when you’d taken a spontaneous trip to barcelona, you hadn’t expected to meet hoseok. more than that, you hadn’t expected to begin a torrid affair with him."
➺ idealizations concerning real life relations - by @venusiangguk
| jungkook x reader | 40.9k
fuckboy!jk x hopeless romantic!oc, s2l, fwb, smut, angst, oneshot
>> summary: "jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return."
➺ peach parfait - by @jamaisjoons
| seokjin x reader | 19k
enemies to lovers au, fluff, smut, slight angst, two parts
>> summary: "you and seokjin have always been at odds as the top two chefs at big hit academy of culinary arts."
➺ tell me no lies - by @jeongi
| jungkook x reader | 15.1k
ceo au, criminal au, robbers au, angst, smut, minimal fluff
>> summary: "you chose to rob your boss, however; you never expected to fall in love with him."
➺ concrete king - by @bratkook
| jungkook x reader | 16.7k
sweet summer romance, fluff, smut, himbo energy, two parts
>> summary: "when a cute boy in a tacky hawaiian shirt lands a trick in your honor there's no way you could ever say no to him."
3K notes · View notes
ivygguk · 3 months
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jeon jungkook fic recs!!
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One-shots:-
Campus affairs - @kooktrash
summary: you transferred to a new college during second semester and you didn’t expect much excitement out for. that’s until jungkook came along and what had struggled to be a friendship was becoming so much more.
Cool with you - @kooktrash
summary: your break up from kim taehyung sent you spiraling into what felt like a midlife crisis of tear stained cheeks and tubs of half eaten ice cream with a broken heart. after finding out that your neighbor, jeon jungkook, was eavesdropping on your meltdowns and came to find out that your ex was his old friend, he found himself wanting to comfort you. he knew the kind of guy Taehyung was and he didn’t want to see you beat yourself up over a guy who wasn’t worth it so in the end he helped you through it and was unable to ignore the growing attraction you felt toward each other.
Million dollar darling - @kooktrash
summary: jeon jungkook is well aware of how privileged he is to have been born into the life he was given. it was glamorous and influential yet close-knit and suffocating, something he thought he wanted to escape from. a trip back home to the circle of wealth and snottiness for his best friend’s million dollar wedding has reminded him of all the reasons why he wanted to leave in the first place… and all the reasons he should stay — the main one being you, the spoiled rich girl he knew was utterly perfect for him.
Close the distance - @hearts4joon
summary: two different adults, living two completely separate lives — in the same neighborhood. a guy whose overbearing mother makes him carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. a girl whose parents are all too drawn to her younger siblings to even give her the time of day. while the two fall in an unlikely relationship (very unlikely), they still ravish each and every part of one another in every way — the best of attention, the one they both craved all their lives.
Cat got your tongue - @jessikahathaway
Summary: You were exhausted from schoolwork and just needed a chance to unwind. Jungkook, campus fuckboy, offers his services to help alleviate the stress from studying but is he going to cause more stress than he relieves?
Anpanman - @honeymoonjin
summary: part of the love yourself collab run by yours truly. your best friend jungkook finally convinces you to seek therapy for your failing mental health. the only catch? the one therapist that’s within your price range is an alternative marriage counsellor, jung hoseok, and the only way jungkook managed to get you an appointment was by saying the two of you were married. will couples counselling actually be useful for your wellbeing, or will something that runs much deeper rise to the surface instead?
Paint me naked - @gimmethatagustd
summary: After the mysteriously hot guy in your university class starts taking an interest in you, should you really trust that he’s not like all the other college fuckboys? Especially when his best friend is the guy who broke your heart?  
2K notes · View notes
marxy-06 · 8 months
Text
Favorites Fic Recs 4
was supposed to post this a long time ago but tumblr didn't save...this got a little long, apologies (or you're welcome?)
Kim Seokjin
Replacement (@akinnie75)
The truth untold (@vminity21)
The flower bridge (@yoongsisbae)
Fall for me (@ebonyinktea)
Cinnamon bliss (@yoonia)
Glazed and dazed (@floralseokjin)
Voix (@yoonia)
With you (@yoonpobs)
I'm all yours (@sailoryooons)
Smile (@shuadotcom)
Scar kisses (@girl8890)
No pyjamas (@jinkookspencil)
Min Yoongi
No more (@gyukult)
Chocolate opal (@babesindestroyland)
Changing one's tune (@1uckygold)
Before you go (@sweetcarrotsandroses97)
Perfect for me (@7dipity)
Ps, is it okay if I start calling you dad (@btsficsandsuch)
The third & sixth (@jimlingss)
Insecurities (@taetae-mic)
Performance evaluation (@kookscrescent)
Tricks of the trade (@stutterfly)
I'll protect you (@glassbangtan)
My miss right (@lavenjoon)
Step up (or step out) (@hollyhomburg)
Never, never fall (@joheunsaram)
The seven year itch (@jimlingss)
The sweetest thing (@illneverrecover)
Ink petals (@yminie)
Quiet and qualms (@sugafreeagustd)
Illicit favors (@yoongiofmine)
Jung Hoseok
Outro: love is not over (@kiirokero)
Heaven sent (@aquagustd)
Sunshower (@jimlingss)
Unconditionally (@rmsrkive)
Kim Namjoon
The stand in (@yoonia)
The making of: Love (@inkjam-moon)
Easy, like sunday morning (@angelguk)
Inside my mind (@jimlingss)
Park Jimin
Into the wilderness (@gukyi)
Darling you're beautiful (@choking-on-tae)
Puppy steps (@simp-4-jm)
Strip (@yoonia)
A special gift (@peachy213jiminie)
Lovesick (@jimlingss)
My forever: Park Jimin (@bts-trash-blog)
The only way (@ethertae)
Exposure (@dreamyjoons)
Kim Taehyung
Charade (@ughcore)
Wabi sabi (@flurrys-creativity)
Like real people do (@bangtanloverboys)
Lost in you (@jjkeverlast)
Spice (@aquagustd)
A little while (@noteguk)
Mine to claim (@jimilter)
Colors (@lovelytaes-blog)
Insomnia (@hobiwonder)
Sweeter than peaches (@jiminisnotavirgin)
Jeon Jungkook
Love is gone (@jeonbunnie)
2002 (@tattookoo) -> pt. 2 to 1999
Drown in your body (@sparklingchim)
Last christmas (@whatifyoulivelikethat)
Bleeding for you (@mixtapejimin)
I can handle it (@beautifulfuckup99)
Blackjack (@kpopfanfictrash)
Fifth wish (@jiminrings)
The spins (@here2bbtstrash)
From home (@gyukult)
The habits of a broken heart (@softykooky)
Not tired (@gggukniverse)
Cool with you (@kooktrash)
Late (@elitekook)
ストロベリー (?) (@euaphoric)
Tender (@liveyun)
A friends help (@armpirate)
Nevertheless (@nochukoo97)
Dress you up (@plvmkoo)
Soju (@plvmkoo)
Jealousy ink (@kooktrash)
Starry night (@kithtaehyung)
When she loved me (@jungkookstatts) [only fanfic that has made me cry, tread carefully)
He is love (@btsrunmylife)
Rattled (@gukslut)
Love alive (@jamaisjoons)
1999 (@tattookoo)
Home (@bonny-kookoo)
Tteokkboki (@taetaesbaebaepsae)
Cat got your tongue (@jessikahathaway)
The boxer's girlfriend (@i-am-baechu)
Honest fuckboy (@hobiwonder)
Perfect love (@i-am-baechu)
Soft (@hamsterclaw)
Brown-eyed baby (@jeonstudios)
Wrong time (@spideyjimin)
Cherry (@peachypinkygloss)
Off-league (@hansolmates)
For me (@personasintro)
OT7
Bon voyage: Into the sea (@yoongsisbae)
Thank you to all of the wonderful writers, ily <3
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moonchild1 · 1 year
Text
min yoongi fic rec list (Ⅴ)
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hi guys it's been a minute since i posted it's been hectic i recently got a promotion so that's been taking up my time but here's another list of my favourite yoongi fics honestly reading them was so much fun and made me feel happy so i hope you enjoy them as much as i did. remember to please show lots of love and support to these incredible authors and creators and their blogs, don't forget to give them a follow , leave a heart, reblog or leave a kind message i know they will appreciate hearing from you, these fics contain smut so no minors interact feel free to send and share any fics you are currently into and would like to share with me i would love hearing from you guys
a- angst s- smut f- fluff
series
love lockdown by @personasintro f s a (enemies to lovers zombie apocalypse)
belong by @ahundredtimesover f s a (exes au basketball yoongi summer love au)
in the margins by @bonvoyagenoona f s a (enemies to friends to lovers slow burn)
look down on me like that by @here2bbtstrash s a (enemies/coworkers to lovers slow burn)
andante cantabile by @kkulfm-2 f s (regency au unrequited love slow enemies to lovers pianist yoongi)
match made in hell by @ughcore  f s a (arranged marriage doctor au rivals to lovers)
only yesterday by @borathae f s a (strangers to lovers)
dating advice by @taleasnewastime f s a (strangers to lovers)
the deal by @untaemedqueen f s a (strangers to lovers gang/cartel au)
matilda by @babystrcandy f s a (brother's best friend unrequited love)
down the hall by @jjungkookislife s a (brother's best friend)
ink nemesis by @scriptaed f a (fake dating au)
unexpected lovers by @jjkeverlast f s a (fake dating artist yoongi)
love is a dog from hell by yourlocalhoney (ao3) f s a (love triangle friends with benefits) ft.Jungkook
petals by @yoonia f (parents au)
pink bird houses by @54daysormore f a (single dad au)
everytime by @deathbyyoongx f s a (fuckboy exes au)
desolate by @angelicyoongie f s a (hybrid au)
one-shot
first-date bait by @jimlingss f (strangers to lovers)
↬first-date bait drabble @/jimlingss s (strangers to lovers)
wallflowers by @bonvoyagenoona s (strangers to lovers)
shirt by @bonvoyagenoona s a (one night stand idol au)
sugar by @zehakoo f s (ceo au strangers to lovers neighbours)
radio sweethearts by @helenazbmrskai s (brother's best friend college au slow burn)
tongue like candy by @jjungkookislife s a (brother's best friend age gap)
auburn skies by @persphonesorchid f s a (brother's best friend)
black and white by @akinnie75 f a (slow burn)
always & forever by @sugakookitty f s (established relationship wedding au)
hard liquor by @chateautae s (boss x employee age gap)
sweetener by @taegularities f s (enemies to lovers fwb au fuckboy)
soft spot by @cultleaderyoongi f (first date)
↬sweet spot by @/cultleaderyoongi f s (established relationship)
sticks & stones by @xpeachesncream f s a (friends to lovers ex friends with benefits pinning au)
fuck being friends by @strawberrynamjoon f a (friends to lovers college au)
the seventh muse by @wwilloww f s (friends to lovers)
tell me what you want by @/wwilloww f s (friends to lovers)
yoongi’s lullaby by @jiminrings f a (unrequited love friends to lovers soulmate au)
illicit favors by @yoongiofmine f s a (friends to lovers)
snow blanket by @yoonieper f s (friends to lovers)
a wager of lords & love @hisunshiine s (regency au arranged marriage)
an empty home by @7deadlysinsfics s a (arranged marriage) ft. Taehyung
the nanny diaries by @btsgotjams27 f (single mom roommate au)
the good part by @introlxv s (roommate au)
handyman by @borathae s a (rebound au roommate au)
peaches in bed by @/borathae s (domestic au husband au)
don't hold hands by @whatifyoulivelikethat s ( friends with benefits roommate au)
by the time i've figured out what it's worth by @ugh-yoongi f s a (marriage au)
swing life away by @aphrodijin f s a (marriage au)
the little things by @kth1 f s (boyfriend au)
fxck a fxckboy! by @yoongifis s (fuckboy)
cupid's curse by @ressjeon s a (first love au)
dawned in by @aquagustd f s (dilf yoongi)
bad things by @yoonia s a (escort au pining)
close call by @xjoonchildx (mafia au)
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↬looking for other myg fics or the other bts members check out my library
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captain-joongz · 3 months
Text
fanfiction recommendations/my favourite reads in 2023
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♤ in pursuit of wedded bliss by @fantasyescapes17
regency au, each members has his own story, but they're interconnected
choi seungcheol
◇ push it down (sooner or later it all comes out) by @dontflailmenow
camboy!seungcheol, ex's best friend!seungcheol, enemies to lovers
♧ down bad (so so bad) by @lovelyhan
idol!seungcheol x pet sitter!reader
☆ always only you by @honeyhotteoks
brother's best friend!seungcheol, friends to lovers
♤ caught in a trap by @cheolism
brother's best friend to lovers au
kim mingyu
☆ a sheep in wolf's clothing by @rubyreduji
virgin!mingyu x experienced reader
♤ creep by @smileysuh
serial killer!ghost!mingyu, touch starved!mingyu, halloween fic
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ot8
◇ skz drabble by @leviackermanscleaningbuddy
a/b/o, cnc, primal play
♧ sharing = caring by @cbini
bf!chan sharing you
☆ camcorder by @tasteracha
bf!minho x reader x chan, a little pervy chan
♤ five for five by @bh-archive
chan x hyunjin x hongjoong x san x juyeon x reader
◇ some things are better left unknown by @roseykat
chan x felix x reader, threesome
lee minho
♧ dilf!minho by @cinhomi
dilf!minho x baby sitter!reader, breeding kink, pregnancy talk
bang chan
☆ bad idea by @hyunsvngs
step dad!chan, getting together, infidelity
hwang hyunjin
♤ dressing down by @jl-micasea-fics
best friends to lovers, mutual pining
lee felix
◇ best friend felix by @ddyskz
best friends to lovers, fluffy smut
♧ felix + thigh riding by @straykeedz
☆ cockwarming by @dreaming-medium
coworkers au, secretary!felix, office sex
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ot7
♤ shadows we trust by @remedyx
supernatural au, mystical creatures!bts, dark circus au
◇ masked miracles by @remedyx
hybrid!bts, detective!reader
♧ stay alive by @staytinyville
mythical creatures!bts, supernatural au
☆ trouvaille by @spookyserenades
hybrid!bts, witch!reader, supernatural au, some horror themes
♤ eternally theirs by @imnotlauriane
dragon!bts, soulmates au, knights au
◇ the lucky seven by @riphobisbraces
hybrid!bts, princess!human!reader
♤ emerald gem by @sweetlyskz
hybrid!bts, reader has a farm, strangers to lovers
♧ oh, little red by @jincherie
wolf!yoongi x reader x wolf!jimin, red riding hood au
min yoongi
☆ celestial ruin by @remedyx
fallen angel!yoongi x angel!reader, corruption arc
♤ fxck a fxckboy by @yoongifis
fuckboy!yoongi x smartass!reader
kim taehyung
◇ isn't that what brothers do? by @aris-ink
step brother!taehyung, forbidden romance, dub con
♧ black swan by @aris-ink
step dad!taehyung, manipulation, corruption, cheating
☆new flame by @gimmethatagustd
alpha!taehyung x omega!reader, heat sex
jeon jungkook
♤ family secrets by @aris-ink
step brother!jungkook, dry humping
◇ icarus by @aris-ink
step brother!jungkook, risky/sneaky sex
♧ close by @aft3rhrs
step brother!jungkook, forbidden romance
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choi soobin
☆ let's play a game by @anyamaris
soobin x reader x yeosang (ateez), friends to lovers, primal play
♤ closed doors by @last-words-ofashootingstar
soobin x reader x hongjoong, idol au, obsessed!soobin
◇ super shy! by @fairyofshampgyu
shy virgin baker!soobin x experienced reader
♧ i &lt;3 nerds by @enha-cafe
nerdy!soobin secretly a sex god au
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multiple members
☆ drippin' by @ncteez
'00 line x reader, friends to lovers, birthday orgy
♤ cookie jar by @neopuppy
step brothers!jeno and jaemin x reader, stuck in a dryer au
♧ sos by @neopuppy
a/b/o, sex pollen au, pollen induced heat/rut
lee jeno
☆ shameless by @neopuppy
step son!jeno x step mom!reader, infidelity, very dub con
♤ hand kink by @jaylaxies
roommates au, hand kink
lee mark
◇ i can help by @recklessmark
step dad!mark, corruption, manipulation, infidelity
ATEEZ rec list pt. 1 | pt. 2
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bangtanficsforyou · 11 months
Text
They Reject You (maknae line)- part two
Pairing: Bts maknae line x Reader
Word Count: 8.8K
Warnings: swear words here and there
A/N: here's my patreon just in case you enjoy reading my stuff!
Park Jimin
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Jimin's eyes light up when he spots you in the cafeteria. You're sitting alone with a cup of coffee and typing away something on your laptop and he can't help but feel like the chair next to you is practically calling for him. 
He makes a quick beeline towards your table and occupies the seat. "Hey, sweetheart."
You don't bother looking up at him as your eyes remain fixed on the screen.
"You shouldn't be sitting alone, if you needed company you could have just texted me," he suggests taking hold of your coffee cup. His plump lips wrap around the straw and he draws up the liquid extra loudly, knowing very well that the noise annoys you.
However, you pay no attention to his lack of table manners.
"Do you know we were supposed to have an exam today but it got cancelled?" He speaks in a tone of disappointment, knowing you'd agree with him. It's one of your icks when you've worked hard for something and have shown up for it, but ultimately do not get the chance to prove yourself.
But you still remain focused on your work and give no reaction or response.
At this point, Jimin finds himself feeling curious as to what might be so important in your laptop that it has all your attention. He leans forward to take a peek and realises that you're working on an assignment.
"Assignments are now more important than me, I see," sighing dramatically he looks down as if upset by your lack of acknowledgement. Not even a moment later he looks up subtly to check if you're looking at him.
When he realises that you aren't, the slightest bit of annoyance sparks inside him.
"If you're not going to talk to me, I should just leave," he keeps his tone casual, not intending to let the fact that he's feeling grumpy, be known.
You tilt your head cutely and mumble something along the lines of vertices having a degree two to yourself. 
Jimin's jaw drops in complete shock. The last time you two had a proper chat was three days back and now that he's trying to talk to you, this is how you treat him?! If that's what you want, fine. He isn't going to sit here and beg you to pay attention to him.
"Fine, I'll leave. I have better stuff to do anyway," he grumbles and takes his leave.
If anyone were to take notice of Jimin's expressions, they'd probably end up laughing. He looks angry but that little pout on his lips and the sad look in his eyes makes him look like a little child throwing tantrums. 
It's a good thing your eyes are not on him. Not even when he makes his leave.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Two classes later, Jimin is scrolling through his Instagram when he comes across a reel of a cute puppy doing the usual puppy antics. His first instinct is to send it to you. However, when he clicks on the share button, he doesn't find your account on the list of people to send. His brows furrow in confusion and he types your account id on the search bar only for the screen to read a message saying no matches found. 
Have you....have you blocked him?
He exits the application and opens WhatsApp. When his eyes land on your contact he notices how your profile picture is appearing to be blank and it only makes him desperately type out a message to you. 
Throughout the class, he keeps hoping that he'd notice a double tick to assure him that you haven't blocked him but unfortunately, no such thing occurs.
At the end of the day, he goes to sleep with a displeased frown. How could you do this? How could you just ignore him during recess and then block him on social media out of nowhere? He didn't even do anything wrong. 
Did he?
He tries to recall the last time the both of you had a proper conversation and his mind goes to the events that occurred on the night of the frat party. 
It's true that you had snapped at him and that the conversation you had, would not fall under the category of 'friendly'. But he didn't think it was serious, either. Both of you had silly arguments here and there, but it never seemed to matter in the long run. Somehow or the other, Jimin always managed to get under your skin and get a reaction out of you. Sooner or later, the two of you would fall back to the rhythm of him annoying the shit out of you and you talking back to him. 
The more Jimin recalls the little fiery banters you two have engaged in, in the past, the more his confidence grows. He tells himself this time would be no different. It may take a little more time but Jimin is sure you'll be talking to him again. 
It's true that you have never blocked him before. Or never have downright ignored him like this. Even when you would appear to be mad, there was always that little twitch of your eyes or you poking the inside of your cheeks with your tongue, which let him know that he was being successful.
But it doesn't matter. 
Maybe you're really really mad at him this time. But he's sure he will melt that anger away with his smile and charm.
It works on everyone, no doubt it will work on you as well.
----------------------------------------------------------------
With a wide confident smirk plastered on his face, he walks into your classroom and looks for you. 
His smirk softens into a small smile when he spots you with your head buried in books. 
He ignores the hushed whispers and the dreamy stares and walks to your seat before sliding next to you. 
"Hey sweetheart," he says, putting the effort to make his voice extra sultry and smooth. That always works on the girls. 
And for a moment, Jimin thinks he has won when he notices the look of complete surprise on your face. However, his victory is short-lived as your surprise fades quickly and once it does you're back to your work without paying him any mind.
"I got you a gift," he places the said gift on top of your notebook. A rose. "I looked at it and it reminded me of you."
Your hands falter for a brief moment as the nib of your pen is met by the flower. You use your other hand to move the flower out of your way.
Jimin huffs. He is starting to get annoyed and there's this sense of unsettlement in his veins but he tries to look amused. If there's one thing that bothered you to no end, it was when he found your anger as a source of his amusement. 
"Awww," he coos with an underlying tone of mockery. "Are you angry at me?" 
You don't react. Jimin is neither surprised nor flattered. 
"It's so cute though," he comments, and only if you were looking at him would you have known it's only his voice that gives the faux impression of him being amused. His eyes, his frown even the curve of his lips don't hide the fact that he is anything but not amused. 
Jimin feels a mix of frustration and desperation, which makes him snatch the pen away from your hand.
You seem startled by his actions but instead of arguing with him for being such a pain in the ass, your hand makes its way to your pencil pouch. However, before you can take another pen out, Jimin is taking that away from you as well. 
"You aren't getting these back until you talk to me," he declares, as he hugs the pouch and your pen close to his chest as if shielding them away from you.
You sigh, not out of agitation or anger. You seem bored. Something that scares and hurts Jimin, at the same time.
"What do you want?" You query, finally talking to him directly. After four days.
"What do you mean by what do you want?" He scoffs, making air quotes to mock your question. "You aren't talking to me and have blocked me on socials. What do you think I want?"
You sigh, once again and once again you look bored. As if you'd prefer to be anywhere but here. "I thought you had a reputation for being a fuckboy or something."
Jimin's brow furrow in confusion. "What does that have anything to do with this?"
"As a fuckboy whose commitment lasts for only one night, you must have faced many instances where you just wanted the girl to just take the hint," you state, speaking in a tone that's so calm that it makes Jimin squirm in discomfort. "Wonder why then, do you not know when to take the hint yourself."
His eyes fall and suddenly all traces of anger and frustration is gone and is replaced by sadness. Jimin looks a like sad kid who has just been told Santa isn't real. 
The look in Jimin's eyes catches you by surprise. He is an expert at making sad eyes to lure someone in. You know that because you have been a victim of it. But Jimin's eyes always had that little spark in them. Something that gave away his act and highlighted the mischief brewing within them. Something that let you on the fact that he's only pretending to be sad. 
However, now that you look into his eyes, they just seem dull. Making it seem like Jimin is sad, maybe for real this time.
You ignore the urge you feel to comfort him and maintain a blank face. Why should you even feel bad for choosing yourself? How many times has he thought or cared about his words and how they have made you feel? How many times was he there to wipe the tears that he made you cry?
Not even once. 
You may be someone who's tough and headstrong but you're also just as soft and loving on the inside. If you give in now and comfort him just to see him happy, you know you will be repeating the same cycle with yourself. And it would be so damn toxic.  
"Are you really not going to talk to me?" He whispers, in a soft voice. 
"I don't want to, trust me." This time your voice is not cold. This time you sound like you. The you, Jimin is familiar with. You don't even seem mad. And that's exactly how Jimin knows that you mean what you're saying.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Jimin has had a tough week. 
Nothing out of the ordinary, perse. He has been going to parties, has been getting drunk and has been the same him. But maybe that's exactly why he is having a tough time. Because despite doing regular 'Jimin' things, he hasn't been feeling like himself. 
He doesn't even know what's wrong. Or maybe he does, he just wants to ignore it and pretend that everything is fine. That he's fine. 
He does his classes and tries his best to focus on the material that's being taught but somehow or the other, he zones out. 
But it's not like it's a big deal. It's normal and all cool. He's fine. 
During football practice, he misses the opportunities that present themselves to him as if he's a blind man. 
But again, that's normal, right? Even the best of players make mistakes. Who's Jimin to not make one? It's fine. He's fine. 
During lunch, he accidentally puts pepper instead of salt in his food. But that's also normal! Nothing out of the ordinary. 
He's fine. 
He repeats these two words in his mind as he makes his way to the next class. However, he is met by a sight that has his steps halting.
It's you. 
You have your head thrown back and you're laughing at something your friend said.
The scene causes a stir of emotions inside him. 
One of the first things he feels is longing. Any other time he would deny it with everything in his being but now that you're in front of him like this, he simply can't. He misses you. He misses talking to you. He misses teasing you. He misses how your nose would scrunch up in annoyance. He misses the way you would chew on your lower lip to hold back from smiling. 
He misses everything about you.
The next emotion that hits him is anger. Here he is, feeling like he can't act and function normally without you, and there you are totally unbothered. 
The thought also scares him. What if, what if you just don't care about him anymore?
If that so happens to be the case, Jimin at least needs to know for sure. He can't be going around like this with a hole in his chest and having unanswered questions in his mind regarding what exactly happened for you to suddenly cut him off like this.
So, the next thing he knows, he's walking towards you. Ignoring the surprised look on your face, he grabs the courage to speak. 
"Can I talk to you for two minutes?"
You look at your watch simply because you need to make an excuse as to why you can't give him the two minutes. "Sorry, I have to head for my class."
Jimin nods, having expected something like that. "We can talk while walking. I'll drop you to your class."
"You don't need to–"
"I want to," he cuts you off with a determined look on his face, not willing to take no for an answer.
Truth be told, you have no intention of talking to him. But somewhere, at the back of your mind, you're curious as to what he might have to say. After all, after one whole week of Jimin not trying to bug you, you had honestly assumed that that was the end of whatever friendship (if you can even call it that) you two had. 
Jimin takes note of the indecisive look on your face and before you can come to a negative decision, he takes hold of your hand and gently tugs you to a side. 
"What–"
"I am sorry but I had to," he says with a tone that conveys nothing but sincerity. 
You're half pissed at Jimin's behaviour but you ignore it nevertheless, thinking that whatever it is that he has to say, it must be serious. Because you have never seen Jimin being like this before. 
"Whatever you want to say, make it quick," you say with a sigh. 
"Why are you cutting me off like this?" Jimin's words are out of his mouth the moment he knows that you're ready to listen to him. It's like he has been waiting for ages to ask you this particular question. 
Your brows furrow for a split second before you scoff. "Is that what this is all about?"
He is confused as to why you're looking at him as if he has asked a really stupid question.
"Yes?" He responds hesitantly. 
You sigh once again, this time much louder and in disbelief. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe this," you mutter to yourself before looking at Jimin and he does not miss the gleam in your eyes. 
"Let me spell it out for you, you were an asshole to me," you state, your voice having a certain hint of anger to them. 
"A-Asshole? How?" He stutters, looking even more confused than before. 
"You knew I had feelings for you, but you couldn't give two shits about it. I had no issues with you not liking me back, but rubbing all your sexual escapades on my face, and flirting with me is a total disregard and disrespect to how I feel."
"I didn't–"
"It doesn't take much for someone to realise that. Anyone with the minimum common sense can figure that out for themselves. But just because your feelings have always been shallow does not mean that the people around you are shallow as well."
There are a lot of responses that come to Jimin's mind but he knows none of those are good enough.
"Do you know how much of a fool I felt when you were being ignorant of the fact that I am a person who feels? I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn't even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve."
Each word of yours hits him like a bullet but he thinks this has been a long time coming. He is willing to take as many hits as it requires, but he just hopes this is not the end. That somehow he gets to redeem himself. No matter how difficult it is. 
"But at some point, you realise that you shouldn't put up with someone who doesn't appreciate you. I know how I deserve to be treated and it's obvious that you don't know how to treat a woman with respect. Hence, I'm afraid we can't be….friends anymore." 
You paused briefly before using the word friends as if you were not even sure if that's what you two were. And it sure as hell, makes Jimin feel shittier than he did moments ago. 
Oh my goodness, he really has messed this up, hasn't he? 
When you turn around to leave, Jimin doesn't stop you, knowing very well there's nothing much he can say to prove that you mean much more to him than what he has made you believe. 
So he lets you go. 
But only with the intention of earning your forgiveness.
Kim Taehyung
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February
Tae 🐻:  did you reach home?
You: yes, just did!
Tae 🐻: i see
Tae 🐻: take rest and sleep well
Tae 🐻: also, i got a little something for you 
Tae 🐻: *image attached*
On clicking the picture, you're greeted with a small little teddy bear that looks adorable in every way possible.
It brings a smile to your face and there's a part of you that knows that it's his way of apologising for the dimmed smile you had throughout the day. His words may have been upsetting but at least he knows the effect they have had on you. And you know he's sorry for it. Mayhaps, that makes it a bit easier for you.
You: it's cute 
Tae 🐻: i know 
Tae 🐻: that's exactly why it reminded me of you 
You chuckle and shake your head softly.
He never leaves a chance to flirt.
--------------------------------------------------------------
April
You: you won't believe what happened
Tae 🐻: what
Tae 🐻: What
Tae 🐻: WHAAATTTT
You: a cat just snuggled against me.
You: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???
You: like i used to be so scared of them 
You: but now i think they are just soft little balls of fur
You: now i want a cat for myself
Tae 🐻: this is so cute for some reason
Tae 🐻: i can just imagine your bright excited smile *sighs*
Tae 🐻: I'm glad you are not scared of cats anymore 👍😌
Tae 🐻: but but but 
Tae 🐻: idk how to feel about you getting a cat
Tae 🐻: what if you get one and then your whole attention is on them and then you forget about me 👉👈
You: 🙄
You: is this supposed to be a joke?
You: can i not have a bear and a cat at the same time???? 😒
You: also, don't worry i doubt the cat can ever get as annoying as you're 
You: so in a way, you'll always be special 😌
Tae 🐻: uhh thank you
Tae 🐻: that's very reassuring 🤗💖
You: well why, you're welcome 🤗
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July
Your phone rings making you alert of an incoming call. Checking the screen you realise that it's Tae. 
"Hello?" You greet in a sing-song voice, your mood suddenly turning bright.
"Hello, my lady," he greets back in a British accent. "How have you been?"
"Same old, mate, same old," you sigh, mimicking his accent. "Work has been hectic."
"It's even worse that I haven't seen you for so many days" he huffs, his accent gone and voice sounding whiny and complaining. Something that makes you think he has a cute adorable pout on his face.
"I know, work decided to be the biggest bitch ever," which is why you and Taehyung have not been able to find free time to spend with each other. 
The lunchtime for his department changed, making it impossible to have lunch together. Your department has way more workload than his does and as a result of which, you always have to stay back at least an hour to complete your share of work.
Taehyung doesn't wait for you or for your work to get done. And in a way, you're glad. You can't imagine how tiring it can be to wait a whole hour after a full day of work when you know you have the option to just go home and lay in bed and do nothing. 
Everyone deserves good rest and sleep after spending a whole day in front of a computer and that includes Taehyung. You'd never expect him to wait for you or do anything that would be at the cost of his discomfort.
Anyways, it's not like you and him have been out of touch. You text him about every silly little thing that would occur throughout your day. It could be a lizard staring at you intensely as if judging the way you're brushing your teeth, and Taehyung will be the first person to know about it. Hence, yes you do miss his presence physically but your days have been filled with him. 
You both have chatted for hours on end, sometimes via text, other times on a call.
This time is no different. You two end up talking for a whole hour before, he says something that ends with your heart skipping a few too many beats.
"Hey man, I won't say I love you on the phone," he jokes, but there's just something in those words that tells you he knows this isn't just a joke. "That's not fair to the both of us."
It is said out of nowhere, yet it fits the context of the conversation as well as of the situation you both are in. 
"Umm, w-well, say it in person I guess." Your cheeks warm up, a bashful smile that is so incredibly shy at the same time, adorning your lips.
"So I will," he whispers as if even though you two are only connected via call, he knows how gentle this moment is and what it means to you.
And then, the conversation is loud again. You with your silliness and him playing along with it and laughing loudly at your antiques.
----------------------------------------------------------------
September
"Why do you look down?" You query as you munch on popcorn.
Taehyung shakes his head, denying anything's wrong. "Nothing, I just feel tired, I guess."
Bullshit. You know Taehyung well enough to know when he's lying. His eyes just twinkle in a certain way as if on alert about being caught. 
"Do you want to leave?" You whisper, paying mind to the people around you. The last thing you want is the people in the movie hall shushing you or glaring at you.
He shakes his head, again. This time more vehemently. "No, I want to watch this movie with you."
You sigh but then speak in a gentle tone. "You know you can tell me right? Anything that's bothering you, you can tell me."
Taehyung looks at you and there's that certain look of vulnerability as if he's scared and worried. But whatever it was that he was looking for, he finds it in your eyes. It makes him decide that yes, he can be honest with you.
"Remember Kira? I saw her today and I guess it just triggered something within me."
Kira. 
How can you forget that name? 
Two months in your friendship and the both of you had discussed your lists of shitty exes and Kira was a topic discussed in detail.
Kira was his first and only girlfriend whom he loved a lot. Their relationship was filled with ups and downs but he never let it come in the way. He was there for her in ways you only see in movies and shows. But alas, things did come to an end. 
What hurt Taehyung more than the relationship coming to an end were the comments made by Kira. She didn't stutter while saying that he's just not the kind of guy she's into. He isn't bulky or muscular. He laughs too much and smiles easily. He isn't intimidating and is very gullible and naive. 
That...that was what broke him.
You remember the day he told you about Kira. It had made you so angry. How could anyone ever say something like that about a person? If you're not interested you're most welcome to leave but why go an extra step to be an asshole and scar someone? 
What was worse was the fact that you could tell Taehyung believed in those words. He thought they were a down point to his character and that it made him unlovable. 
It's also since that day, that you have developed this protectiveness over him. He may not see it but he deserves the absolute best. He deserves to know that it isn't difficult to love him at all, in fact, it might just be the easiest thing in the world. 
But right now, you know that her words from the past are probably being repeated in his mind over and over again. Hence, it becomes your goal to make him see that those words are not true. 
"I understand why it may have been triggering for you," you comment taking hold of his hands and playing with his fingers. "But I assure you, she was only being a bitch because she knew she losing a gem."
Taehyung smiles a smile that does not reach his ears. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me. I'm not done yet."
For the first time this evening, the briefest spark of amusement enters his gaze. 
"I know she hurt you, but if you need a reminder that what she said to you was total bullshit, I'll serve as one."
Your voice comes out firm but there's that tone of love and affection to it, that is simply unmissable.
"People say and do mean things and they hurt us. But their choice of actions and words define them, not us. At some point, you have got to stop and realise that you can't keep hurting yourself because of what someone has said. It's difficult to do that, I know but that difficulty is worth it. You are worth it."
A small, tiny smile appears on Taehyung's lips at your words. Before he can get the words out to express his gratitude, you're speaking again.
"Also, all those things that she made you feel were unlovable about you, make you just that much more lovable. Because that's what makes you, you."
Once you're done, you feel the insecurity hit you that you may have been a little too passionate or that you went overboard. But Taehyung resting his head on your shoulder and muttering the softest of thank you's makes you relax. 
And that's how you watch the rest of the movie. With his head on your shoulders and him constantly wanting some part of his body to be in touch with yours.
---------------------------------------------------------------
December
You were promoted. 
You won't say it was out of the blue, you had seen it coming. Despite that, being recognised and awarded for your hard work, felt nice. 
But your promotion also meant you were now working in a different branch of your office. Same city, a different building. This also meant the chances of you and Taehyung meeting in between work had slimmed down to zero.
But again, it didn't seem to affect the bond you two shared. You two chatted with each other about your day almost regularly. It just didn't feel right, without telling him about the itsy bitsy details of your day-to-day life. 
It was your second week in the new building and by now you had become comfortable enough with the group of fellow employees you were mingling with, for them to ask the very important question. "Do you have someone special in your life?"
The question was asked in good spirits, with raised eyebrows, teasing smiles and mayhaps with an underlying hope that the answer to the question would be 'no' so that they can set you up with the company sweetheart Jeon Jungkook, who you have a hunch, has a crush on you.
Nevertheless, the question makes you stutter. 
It's not a difficult question to answer if the answer is a simple yes or no. But in your case, it's not so simple. It's complicated. 
But how do you explain it to them? 
You don't even know where you and Taehyung lie. You both have never directly addressed the feelings except once or twice. But what does that mean now? Do you two fall under the category of "more than friends, less than lovers"? 
You don't know.
You don't know if he still has feelings for you. What if it was just a phase and now all that you two are is just good friends? What if you're the only one who keeps thinking of the time you had confessed and what if you're the only one to whom the moments spent with the other, mean something special? 
But what if the opposite is true? What if he still has feelings for you, what if it wasn't just a phase? What if the moments spent with you, mean something to him as well?
Gosh, this indeed is complicated.
You take a deep breath and conclude that irrespective of whatever his feelings for you may be. You're someone who cares for him. A lot. 
You don't want to be someone who hurts him, ever. Knowing of the few instances that he has been hurt and the way he has been hurt, you never want to make him feel like he failed at love again. Or that, he isn't worthy of love. 
You don't want to assume that Taehyung has feelings for you. At the same time, you don't want to assume that he doesn't. Because you know, if you assume that he doesn't have feelings for you and act accordingly, and then it turns out that he still did, he will feel crushed.
"Let's just say, I do have a certain someone," you answer with a shy smile.
Your new coworkers look disappointed for a brief second, most likely because now they won't be able to play matchmakers but the disappointment is soon replaced by excitement. 
Multiple questions are thrown your way to know about this special person and you spend the rest of lunch trying to answer them as swiftly as possible.
--------------------------------------------------------------
February
You: why the 🙄 next to her name?
You ask in reference to him re-posting a status update of a co-worker on Whatsapp. Something about company lunch.
Tae 🐻: cause she's annoying! 
You: lmao why so 😂
Tae 🐻: oh boy she has no respect for boundaries 
Tae 🐻: her jokes are in such poor taste and inappropriate
Tae 🐻: it's just annoying and hence would explain the emoji choice
You: damn 
You: that's harsh 
You: but I'll trust your judgement
Tae 🐻: as you should, yes 😒
You: but this has me curious, if you were to put an emoji next to my name, what would it be? 👀
Tae 🐻: damn that's a good question
Tae 🐻: let me think
Tae 🐻: How about this one? ✨
You: huh? 
You: that's kind of unique 
You: why that one though?
Tae 🐻: because you shine, duh
Tae 🐻: and you light up every room you walk into 
Tae 🐻: and this ✨ just suits you 
Yet again, you feel the familiar warmth in your chest that at this point is just very common every time you talk to him.
But that doesn't make these little moments any less special for you.
------------------------------------------------------------
March.
Work was extra tiring today. You couldn't catch a breather. Couldn't even go to lunch. Stayed back after work till eleven.
And now here you're, finally home.
While having your ramen, you decide to respond to texts that you haven't and so open WhatsApp. 
Once done, you check through the status updates of people. It's always nice to know what fun people have been up to while you were being drained of all energy.
However, you frown when Taehyung's status appears on your screen. There are a few paragraphs written about love and how it can change the way you view life. When the next slide appears, it's a picture of him with a girl. He has his arm casually on the girl's shoulder as they smile at the camera. That added with the heart emoji as the caption causes a weird nervous sensation in your stomach. 
You type out a question as a reply to his status.
You: what is all this about? 😂
You add a laughing emoji next to it just to make sure you sound casual and curious.
Taehyung so happens to be online and his response comes quickly.
Tae 🐻: did you not see my status updates? 😂
Tae 🐻: I'm in a relationship ☺️
And just like that, your hands start shaking and the food in front of you gets forgotten.
Jeon Jungkook
Tumblr media
It's been almost a month since you confessed to Jungkook. 
During the first week, you tried to reach out to him because you were so angsty to just get some sort of response. You didn't care if it was in the negative or was harsh. Anything was better than this. Anything was better than him just straight out ignoring your presence as if you never existed. 
You just couldn't understand. Did the friendship you two had mean nothing to him? Did you ever mean anything to him? If you did, how could he possibly treat you this way? Did you not deserve at least a proper explanation as to why he was doing what he was doing?
But after a week, you gave up. Your hurt turned into anger. You didn't care what his possible explanation could be. You did deserve better than this. So you ultimately stopped trying to reach out to him.
It's not like it doesn't bother you. Sometimes, it still does. But the difference is, you have stopped expecting anything from him. And that admittedly, makes it a little easier for you.
"What are we doing today?" Namjoon asks with a bright dimpled smile as he took his seat on the chair. 
"Four short interviews and then a late-night show," you reply, quickly opening your pouches to get out the brushes. 
He sighs. "Another round of answering what our love life looks like."
You snicker, finding it hilarious how done he looks. "Another round of you answering on behalf of the team that you all are a little too busy to find time for dating."
Namjoon shakes his head. "Sometimes I wish I didn't know English." 
The thought makes you laugh with your head thrown back.
"Well I can't imagine anyone else being the spokesperson, it would be damn funny."
You really do think that would be the case. Each of the members has a very distinct personality and just imagining what they would be like, is nothing short of amusing to you. 
Your amusement, however, dwindles when your mind comes up with the question about what Jungkook would be like if he were the one translating other members' words into English. But then your mind leads you to imagine how cute his English is, despite being broken. And then your heart ultimately shrank and you had to remind yourself to not think of him.
Namjoon seems to notice your distress and quickly changea the conversation to something else. 
Thankfully, it works. There are no other sad moments where your mind goes to Jungkook and you find yourself enjoying your conversation with Namjoon and that was more than enough. 
-----------------------------------------------------------------
It's three in the afternoon, you conclude after checking your watch. Which means another interview left and after that the boys can rest, until the late-night show of course. This also, means that there's another hour for you to just relax in the AC room. After that, you will have to get to work to remove Namjoon's makeup.
You lay down on the sofa and scroll through Instagram. What's better entertainment than this? 
Your fingers get to work and start scrolling, one meme after the other. Some you find hilarious, some you need to read twice to get and some you simply roll your eyes at. But you guess, that's just how memes are.
However, it's after a few more posts that you find one which simply makes you blink in disbelief. 
It's a picture from the news outlet dispatch. The picture in question is of Jungkook's with his arms around a woman. On reading the caption you realise that the said woman is, Niki from the girl group JION. And to no one's surprise, the photo has caused a stir on the internet and apparently, everyone's talking about it. 
You exit Instagram and open Google. You search for Jungkook and Niki are immediately met with a bunch of articles. Each of them discusses their possible relationship and whether or not they are dating. 
When you feel like you have had enough of the sick churning of your stomach, you close all apps and just shut your phone. 
Wow. 
This is something.
It leaves you perplexed and with a bunch of emotions, you have no idea how to deal with. 
Was he already seeing the woman when you left that note? Gosh, if that's the case, it would be so embarrassing. 
Is that why he thought it would be best to just get rid of you? Was that why he made that sudden move out of nowhere? Couldn't he just tell you that he is dating someone else? Learning this from a news outlet, for every reason, feels painful.
It's not even the fact that he is dating someone. It's just the fact that you both have become such strangers that he feels like a distant person you once used to know. All because you decided to trust him with your feelings.
But most likely it didn't matter. Your feelings didn't matter. You're someone who's always behind the scenes, someone who no one knows. But him? He is the world-renowned artist. He is the one who earns in millions and has an army of fangirls, quite literally. Why should he waste his time caring about how you feel? More importantly, why did you expect him to? 
It was undoubtedly a mistake on your part to have trusted him. As they say, expectations lead to heartbreaks and maybe you had to learn it the hard way. 
But that doesn't mean the pain is anywhere near acceptable. You needed a way to vent your anger, so you do the only thing that comes to your mind.
You block him on all social media sites.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Two weeks since the rumour about Jungkook and Niki dating begun and it's still all over the net. Why, you ask? Because the two people involved in the matter aren't helping their case at all. 
They have been spotted several times together and thus have been fuelling the rumours further. 
It angered you. Weren't idols supposed to be very careful about their relationships? Why were then, these two, flaunting their relationship for the world to see?
You're aware you sound bitter and ridiculous because no one should have to hide if they are dating someone but you just can't help yourself. No matter how hard you try, news about Jungkook and Niki would somehow or the other appear on your feed, be it on insta or Google. It just became unavoidable as these two were everywhere.
The comments didn't help either. People adored them. 
Apparently, these two were the perfect match for each other. Both maknaes of their individual groups and both fan favourites. 
It made it suck all the more for you. 
Argh. 
"Have you seen my chapstick?" Namjoon asks as soon as he enters the room. "Hobi just lectured me about how I should always keep my lips moisturised." 
"It should be in the drawer," you reply and get up to look for the chapstick. "Let me check once."
As it turns out, it indeed was in the drawer. You hand the small tube to him and as soon as you take a seat again, the door swings open to reveal someone you would have never imagined seeing. 
Niki.
"Namjoon oppa," she smiled, putting her dimples on display. "I was looking for you."
Namjoon turned around at the sound of his name. His expression too turns into that of surprise when he realises who it is. "Niki! I didn't know you'd be coming."
Huh, makes the two of us. 
The two idols chit chat and you ignore all of it. Simply, because they seem to get along really well and if there's one thing you know about Namjoon it's how protective he is of all the members. But if he likes and approves of Niki, well you guess she and Jungkook might just be the perfect match. 
It's not like Niki totally ignores your presence. She shoots you a smile that's sweet and warm, and you smile at her right back. Your's looking a tad bit less sincere.
Thankfully, whatever conversation the two of them were having soon comes to an end and Niki leaves the room. 
As soon as it is just you and Namjoon, you blurt out the question you have been wanting to ask for a long time. 
"Are they really dating?" 
Namjoon doesn't seem too surprised by your question, if anything he looks like he expected it. However, he does look hesitant to answer. "Umm, yes they are."
Shit. 
You don't know why you had to ask the question but you did, and now you got your pretty little confirmation and now you're hurting again. 
Well, shit, indeed.
But but but, why was Namjoon hesitant to answer? Was he perhaps aware you had feelings for Jungkook? Had Jungkook told him the reason of requesting a change? 
Fuck, you should really have kept your curiosity to yourself because now your mind is running wild and it's not helping you at all. 
"But, I don't think it's anything serious," Namjoon adds after a beat of silence then nods as if reassuring himself that it was the right thing to say.
It makes you even more paranoid that Namjoon knows about your little more than crush on Jungkook and it makes you want to flee from the spot. 
"Uhmmm, I need to pee," you squeak out and immediately shut your eyes because gosh that was stupid. 
"Uhh, okay." Thankfully, Namjoon isn't weirded out by your silly choice of words. Instead, he looks amused and there might have been something else in his gaze but you are too embarrassed to take notice.
You quickly leave the room and rush your way to the washroom. As soon as you're in, you splash your face with water.
What the fuck? Does Namjoon know? Does it mean that the other members know too? How are you ever going to face them again? 
Shit. Shit. Shit.
This is no good. You should have never confessed. You should never have listened to those excited beats of your heart and to those fluttering butterflies. Look where it got you.
"Don't worry about it, babe. It's all cool, it's all under control now." A voice reaches your ears from one of the stalls in the washroom. 
You assume the woman must be talking on the phone and you ignore it.
"Yes, I know how you feel about it but trust me this whole thing with Jungkook should be over in like a few weeks."
Now, that has your ears all perked up in attention. 
"You know, I don't even like him like that."
What. The. Fuck. 
"I'm not mad at you for it, relax babe, I love you."
And just like that, you hear the toilet flush and the doorknob jiggling followed by Niki stepping out. 
You pour the liquid soap on your hand and wash your hands with them just to look like you weren't eavesdropping on her conversation with her babe. 
Although, could it really be called eavesdropping when she was speaking so loudly? 
Thankfully, Niki doesn't find your behaviour suspicious and leaves the washroom with a small smile lingering on her lips. 
Uhh okay then. 
This is something. 
---------------------------------------------------------------
As soon as the shock dials down and you could think, you knew you had to tell someone. 
You don't know what and how to say, though. You can't just claim that Niki is cheating on Jungkook, despite your initial assumption being that. Because people call their siblings babe too right? Or their best friends? Yes, you can't just assume that she's having an affair behind everyone's back. 
But what you're plenty sure of and have heard Niki admitting is that she does not have feelings for Jungkook. What the heck is going on then? 
Before your mind can start running in circles, the door swings open announcing someone's arrival. Much to your relief, it's Namjoon, someone you can be honest with, without worrying about the technicalities. 
"Listen, I need to talk to you about something," you say, your voice coming out nervous yet firm.
Namjoon takes notice of your nervousness and smiles at you warmly, hoping to put you at ease. "Sure, go ahead."
"I went to the washroom and uhm, I heard Niki talking on the phone about something and I think you should know about it."
A small frown appears on Namjoon's face because of all things, he did not expect that what you had to say was anything related to Niki. He, however, keeps quiet and gives you an encouraging hum to go on. 
"I–She told someone over the phone that she doesn't really have feelings for Jungkook."
Namjoon looks as shocked as you had been but his shock wears off much much quicker than yours did. 
For the first time, he looks a little awkward having this conversation. Scratching the back of his neck, he gives you a small awkward chuckle. "I see what you're saying."
Your first thought to this reaction is that he does not believe you. It would make sense for that to be the case if Jungkook really had told Namjoon about the note. But that does not mean you don't feel incredibly offended and hurt right now. Just because you liked Jungkook does not mean you'd be lying. Is that how much faith Namjoon had in you?
"I'm not lying!" Your voice doesn't hide the emotions you're feeling, not that you were trying to hide them anyway. 
Namjoon's eyes widen and he immediately shakes his head. "No, no, no. That's not what I meant."
You cross your arms and look at him with a scowl, refusing to believe his words. "What did you mean then?" 
He yet, again looks a little sheepish as he answers, "It's just that I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything to me," you reply without missing a beat. "This has nothing to do with me. It has to do with Jungkook. Tell him that this girl probably has some ulterior motives or something. Save him from the heartbreak he will inevitably go through when he comes to that realisation himself."
"You're right, that's exactly what I should do." Something in Namjoon seems to click and he nods. "Wait, I'll be right back."
Just like that, he's walking out in a hurry leaving you all alone in the room. 
---------------------------------------------------------------
It's been fifteen minutes since Namjoon left. 
At first, you were walking with hurried steps from one end of the room to the other but then your anxiety got too much for you and you decided to sort out the skincare items and put them in place. 
Productivity is better than burning calories by walking in circles in a room. Right?
You were only putting the new moisturizer in the drawer when someone clears their throat to announce their presence. 
It rightfully startles you and you let out a small yelp. 
However, when you realise who the person standing in front of you is, it makes your stomach sink. 
Jungkook. 
The same Jungkook you have been avoiding for weeks. Not that it was difficult though, he had never really made any effort to reach out to you. But whatever. 
You swiftly look away from him and get back to work, not wanting to pay him any attention. Why should you? You're not his makeup artist anymore, he does not have any business to be here. 
"Umm, I need to talk to you about Niki." 
You don't respond.
Your silence is met with a sigh from Jungkook. 
"Hyung told me what you heard Niki say. Ummm can you please not share it with anyone else?" 
Maybe it was something about the way the words were phrased but they did not sit well with you.
Your hands pause and a scoff of disbelief makes its way past your lips. Is...is that what he wanted to talk to you about? 
That too, of all things to ask you to not tell others about it? As if you had told Namjoon about it to spread some sort of gossip. The only reason you bothered with it was because....well, you were worried for Jungkook. 
But imagine caring about someone despite being treated the way Jungkook treated you and then that person coming to talk to you for the first time in weeks only to tell you not to get involved. As if it was by choice. 
One thing was for sure, you were this close to letting out the words you have been holding in for a long long time. Your position as a makeup artist be damned. 
"It's just that if word gets out she will be framed as the wrong guy."
She....she will be the one framed as the wrong guy? And you being the one who could potentially do it, doesn't make you sound like the villain? What he's saying is you could do something that could end up making Niki the victim.
That's it. You have had enough. 
"Do you even know what you're saying?"  You speak the words out with your tone laced with every bit of anger you have been keeping in for weeks. 
Jungkook winces. "I do–"
"Let me finish. I have no business telling people what I heard Niki speak on the phone with lord knows who. Heck, if I was selfish I would have just stayed out of it because who's gonna believe my words against those millions of articles and fans shipping you two? But the only reason I thought you should know about it is because what if you really loved her or something? Knowing it later when you're much more invested would be way more painful and crushing." 
Something enters in his gaze but you're too furious to notice or to even pause to give him the time to form a response.
"Not to mention that you treated me like trash. Didn't bother talking to me. Changed your staff without giving a proper reason. Heck, I might just be a make-up artist and you might be a world-renowned artist but I thought we were more than that," for the first time since you started speaking, your voice goes quiet. "To me, you were more than the idol everyone sees. Maybe that's why I assumed I was also someone more than just a make-up artist to you."
"But I guess I was wrong," your voice cracks and as soon as the sound of your wavering voice reaches your ears, you know it's time to shut up. Because no way in hell are you going to cry in front of Jungkook. 
But somehow that single voice crack says a lot.
You have seen Jungkook cry in pain and frustration. You have seen him laugh until his stomach started to hurt. You have seen him drink until he's all giggles and smiles. Those moments had led you to believe that you two were friends, at least. But then if you two ever were friends, he has disrespected that friendship way too much for you to be calm about it.
Jungkook looks at the ground as if it would magically give him the answer to the question of what he should do now. When it doesn't, Jungkook battles himself and ultimately decides that it's best for him to simply say the truth.
He has complicated things enough.
"Niki and I aren't dating." 
------------------------------------------------------
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Text
Untitled
[jungkook x reader]
"You wanna know about art? When the class president starts touching my face on darkened street corners, and talking about my eyes, there's a word for it. There's an entire movement in the 20's—it's called surreal."
Or THE popular fuckboy in your campus suddenly signs up as the figure model to one of your extracurricular activities and starts showing his interest in you.
A/N: I'm not sure where I went with this. Thus, untitled. I'm not even sure where this falls in the tags. But, enjoy!
-
Jungkook is at odds with himself.
Part of him wants to leave and forget about this stupid idea. He doesn't know what compelled him to listen to Jin. What exactly does the old man know about dating anyway? As far as he knows, he's never seen him with the same girl, so maybe he should have reached out to Namjoon instead.
The other part is hyping himself up. In about a few minutes, you’ll be coming through those doors. Besides, it would be too late to back out now. He chugs his bottled water as if he were thirsty. Jungkook thinks he'll pass out from anxiety. If not that, then from how warm it is inside this garage turned makeshift studio.
He feels the beads of sweat trickle down his back and pits.
This is not good.
The class is about to start and he'll be stripping down to his boxers and he's all sweaty. Thinking about that uneventful possibility, makes him sweat more.
Fuck.
He notices someone walk towards the corner he has been hiding in. Judging by how good-looking his face is and the vintage clothing he wears, Jungkook surmises this must be the Senior organizing this art class. Taeyong? Taehyun?
Ah, Taehyung, he remembers.
"You're Jungkook, right?"
Jungkook only nods as a response. His dry throat keeps him from speaking, afraid he squeaks out a reply and embarrasses himself more.
Thankfully, the other man is kind enough to not assume his silence as being standoffish.
"Nervous, huh?" Taehyung smirks, but Jungkook doesn't feel like he's being provoked. Rather, it actually calms him—at least the idea that it must be a common occurrence for models to exude this much anxiety that it's the first question people assume.
"That obvious, huh?" A dry chuckle following. "Do all models get nervous on their first time?" Jungkook finally finds his voice. Albeit, a bit meek for someone with a strong commanding aura.
Taehyung smiles and nods. "More than you expect. Which is understandable. Jin hyung told me you're doing this to learn more about art?"
No, he isn't, he internally protests. He doesn't know what Jin told Taehyung, but the real reason he's here on a Sunday, as a supposed 'volunteer' model for a drawing class is because of you.
The rest, he let Jin fill it out.
But of course, he wouldn't divulge those. So, Jungkook clears his throat before responding with a meek 'yes' as he shoots his empty water bottle in the can, making a clanging noise. He smiles sheepishly at the circled crowd whose attention he caught. He cringes at how much he's going out of his way to act cool. He's never this way, and yet, he wants to make sure you witness him with his best foot forward today.
Jungkook sways on the balls on his feet, taking in the space when he sees you—just as you were hooking your bag in your chair.
Goddamn, you're pretty. He's watching you laugh with another girl stationed near your spot as you lay out your tools on your table.
"Ready when you are." Taehyung breaks him out of his trance, and he replies with a sheepish nod—pretending he wasn't caught staring at you.
Jungkook starts by taking off his shoes, then his leather jacket. He unbuttons his pants and the thought that you would be looking at his crotch makes him blush. He shamelessly imagines you and him as Jack and Rose in that sketching scene. But before he can pull his jeans down, a booming baritone voice hollers at him.
Taehyung hurries towards him. "What the fuck are you doing?"
Jungkook freezes at the sudden aggression. His mouth puckers open and close like a fish coming up for air, as he struggles to come up with a reply.
Taehyung tilts his head and assesses the young man with a pout. "Did Seokjin not tell you this isn't a nude class? We just need you to strip to your shirt and jeans," Taehyung clarifies in a whisper.
Embarrassment floods Jungkook and he sputters out an apology. He silently curses himself between nervous laughs and incoherent words of what seemed to be apologies. Shy doe eyes peeps at you and the confused and scandalized look painted on your face makes him want to get swallowed by the ground and never reappear in front of you ever again.
You must think he’s some kind of a creep or worse, a flasher. With a big exhale, he tries to set aside the embarrassment and go through this. It's already bad enough that his nerves and recent embarrassment made a sweat stain on his shirt.
Not long after, Jungkook stands in the middle of the circle of easels. It actually isn't bad, he thinks. Most of the time, he's staring at wood stands and the occasional heads peeking out of the canvas.
You're on his side, so he can only see you through his peripheral vision. Even so, he can already visualize the vein popping on your forehead when you concentrate—just one of the things he adores on your face.
That afternoon, Jungkook finds out he likes the thought of you paying this much attention and focus on him, instead of the other way around.
He holds his growing smile at bay.
-
The hour-long class went quicker than Jungkook wanted. He takes his time picking up his jacket and pretends to search for something in his bag as he waits for you to pack up. But, you never rise from your seat.
It takes Taehyung tapping your shoulder to bring you out of your world. "You still get tomorrow, Y/N," he hears Taehyung remind you before walking around the room, checking progress.
Jungkook didn't mean to eavesdrop more, but when you stood up and followed Taehyung, he couldn't help but tune in to your conversation.
"I need a little more time to fix a few edges. Can I just extend for a while? I'll clean up the supplies room." You plead, voice kept low as if you're making an illegal trade with Taehyung.
Jungkook hears the older man sigh and call your name softly. "You still have tomorrow to work on it, and the next few days. Plus, I can't suddenly ask the model to stay just for you."
You whine petulantly like a child and Jungkook wonders if he can make you whine under different situations. Perhaps, under hi—
"He can go. I just need—"
The moment he makes out your reply, Jungkook was quick to cut you off and offer his time. "I can stay for a while."
Both you and Taehyung turn your heads to face the man who looks like a deer caught in the headlights, but he might as well have been. Your glowered confused eyes stare into him. "I-if you want," he stutters, so he tries to salvage his image with an obviously feigned nonchalant shrug.
Taehyung holds back his laugh but the sudden expulsion of air from his nose wasn't amiss, earning a side eye from you.
"No need," you answer with finality. "You get paid by the hour, right? I can't pay you and—"
"You don't have to pay me. I'm offering." Jungkook internally winces at how quick he was in offering himself. But if he were being honest, he would stay in this shoddy garage all night, through the blazing summer heat, as long as it's time spent with you.
Is it a crime that he's quick to take an opportunity when it has presented itself?
He thinks abso-fucking-lutely not.
Your eyebrows furrow, the 'I wasn't done talking' death glare you directed at Jungkook has him shift awkwardly on his foot and look everywhere else but at you.
"Still, I'd get in trouble for requesting more time, anyway. Can't have other students think Taehyung here has favorites." You press and it chips a bit of his confidence. It was obvious you didn't want him to stay. If he keeps insisting, you might think he's creepy.
Jungkook didn't want to seem too pushy anyway, and so, lets out a defeated "Oh.." and nods. His round eyes making it easy to see his dismay as it curves downwards a little at the sides.
"I wouldn't worry about that," Taehyung intervenes. The older man was amused as he watched Jungkook flounder around you, he also knows how oblivious and dismissive you are of guys like Jungkook to a fault. And so, he helps.
Ah, young love, Taehyung muses. "Just make sure to clean up and lock up after." He tosses the keys to you, but you make no movement of catching it, letting the keys hit your chest and fall to the ground.
Now your glare is directed towards your sunbaenim. "On second thought, I'm wrapping it up for tonight then." You head towards your easel to pack up your stuff.
Taehyung sighs.
He tells Jungkook to wait a bit and pick up the keys as he follows after you, calling your name.
“Just take the guy's offer to help. He’s trying to learn more about art, too,” he whispers, arms crossing across his chest. "Isn't this the piece you're submitting with your application? I know that head of yours will run nonstop if you don't finish what you intended to do tonight." Taehyung nudges you with a smile and softly jabs his pointer finger to your temple, making you chuckle with a pout. You shoo his hand away from your face and he knows he got you to stay.
This Jungkook kid owes him, Taehyung thinks.
However, from where Jungkook stands, he sees you breaking out the cutest smile at Taehyung. His eyes even going bigger at what he believes is an affectionate touch to your face when Taehyung boops your forehead.
Is that even ethical or something, he wonders irately. Taehyung isn't much older but given that he's your sunbaenim, Jungkook thinks he shouldn't be doing that. Or even be standing close to you. He's currently throwing imaginary lasers at Taehyung's back when you both turn to him and he immediately unsquints his eyes.
"Jungkook, do you still want to stay?" Taehyung shouts at the young man.
Yes.
A hundred times yes. He's a lovesick loyal puppy and if you ask him to bark, he'll bark for you.
Jungkook nods enthusiastically and rushes closer to where you stand, eager to wedge himself between you and Taehyung.
-
"Jungkook," you sigh his name tiredly. "I really need you to stop moving your head. Is there something more interesting behind me?" The question was rhetorical, but you're starting to wonder what he keeps on staring at behind you that you turn your head, only to be greeted with a wall filled with hanged canvases.
You hear him mumble out a you with a smirk, but was quick to cover it up with a sorry. This guy think he was slick.
Jungkook turns his head to assume his supposed pose. His eyes still filled with mirth. And he lasts about four minutes before his head starts turning towards you. Again.
You throw your head forward with an exhausted groan. This was a mistake. You're growing more frustrated by the minute. Maybe you should call it a night.
Looking back up at your model, you tell him he can leave.
Jungkook breaks his stance then quickly poses as he quickly persuades you. "No, I'll stay still. Look," he promises and follows through quickly by holding the pose.
"No, I'm just really too tired for tonight. Thank you for staying a bit longer." You busy yourself by grabbing at your stuff, cleaning pencil shards here and there to keep the lurking unease.
You can't have a breakdown here again, you admonish yourself. And it's going to feel worse after, if Jungkook's here to see it happen. You keep your head down while your hands wipe the charcoal dust on the table.
You hear footsteps nearing you, and you pray to whoever listens that he's not actually coming closer. He calls your name, his voice close and soft. You hum in response, head still hung low, refusing to face him.
Jungkook sees you rubbing an eraser at a blank surface and purses his lips. He finally got the chance to spend time with you and he was hoping to break the ice and get closer to you, but he does this—he upset you and wasted your time. You're not gonna want to spend more time with him after this.
"I-I'm sorry. I really wanted to help. I can stay again tomorrow to make up for tonight," he offers. Everything about him screams eagerness and he must really be interested in art to be willing to stay in the garage-slash-studio during this Summer heat.
You feel the tingling pressure in your throat and your lips quiver. You clear your throat and will away the tears before it breaks through your paper wall.
"No. You did great, Jungkook. I'm just not feeling well tonight." Your voice was too soft, but at least it didn't break.
Jungkook walks past you and turns to face you, hands making contact with your shoulder. "Are you sick? I have some medicine in my bag," he offers. He retracts his hand and unzips his bag to take out whatever medicine he had stashed inside.
It's his genuine concern that does it for you. You suddenly sob and cover your face with your hands.
"Oh, Y/N, are you okay? Does something hurt?" He didn't expect this. Jungkook was taken aback and his worried eyes looked for signs of where you could have been hurt.
Your sobs turned to full-on bawling and Jungkook was quick to take you into his arms. He lets you cry and occasionally whispers assurances between your weeping despite not knowing why you suddenly burst into tears.
In that moment, you stood illuminated by harsh yellowish fluorescent lights like a Gustav Klimt painting on display. The A/C humming noise drowned out by your hiccups and his whispers.
You were the first to pull away. He didn't mean to, but the moment you separated from Jungkook and lowered your hands from your face, he laughed.
Offended at his reaction, you push him away and quickly gather your bag hanging on the chair.
"Wait," he calls for you as he fumbles to pick up the bag he let fall to the floor.
He calls your name but you decidedly ignore him, feet shuffling quickly to leave the garage.
Fucking ass, you think. You're mortified. You already dread tomorrow as your imagination runs wild. What if he tells his friends about your ugly crying? You think you don't care what frat guys think, but you still definitely don't want to be the talk of the campus. You've only transferred here last year and after being briefed by your friend on who to avoid, you made sure not to have a run in with guys like Jungkook.
This is exactly why you were holding everything in earlier. Every stereotype of frat guys being huge assholes behind the charming facade were true.
A flash of high school memories ambush you and you just want to get to your dorm and hide in your blankets. You'll just have to miss tomorrow's class, you plan.
You violently shrug when you feel a hand grip your wrist.
"Hey, will you wait," Jungkook pleads. You turn to face him and see him reach something in his pockets.
Fuck. He's not going to take a photo, isn't he?
You were ready to lunge at him, anything to prevent him from taking a snap at your post-bawl blotched face, when all of sudden, a soft cloth touched your face.
Jungkook chuckles at your startled face.
"You have charcoal smudged all over your face," he points out. His bunny teeth peeks through his curved lips and the sides of his eyes wrinkle from amusement.
"Oh." You visibly flinch when he uses his thumb to brush the apple of your cheeks.
"There," he smiles, eyes fixated on his finger caressing your skin.
"You know you really have pretty eyes."
If you were in a romantic movie, his line would have panned out well. But you're not, so cue the sound of glass breaking to signify a shattered moment.
To think, you bought his act. You thought, here's a deviant frat boy species. Maybe not all of them are only interested in girls and booze. You even thought this Jeon Jungkook isn't so bad.
Until he says that.
Breaking away and stepping back from him, you humorlessly laugh in disbelief.
"You're a fucking cliché, Jungkook. Does this babble usually work on chicks?" You take a look at him and he has the audacity to look unaware of how hokey the situation is.
"Wha—" Poor boy couldn't even finish his sentence, you thought.
"Y/N, I'm not following."
You were about to make a joke on flies flying straight to his agape mouth but you hold yourself back. Instead, you make a gesture of shaking your head as you force out another dry laugh. You look at him one last time and walk away from the frat boy once again.
You hear his footsteps follow you, along with calls of your name. "Did I say something wrong?"
You stop as you reach the threshold—you're almost out of the garage and out into the cold dark night, ready to rush into the safety of your dorm and away from sleazy college boys.
But something in you compels you to turn, and so you do. "Yes, Jungkook. You did." Your hands grip your bag tighter, feet taking a couple of steps back into the garage, to the shoddy light so he can see you.
"Did you really think this charming ‘oh-i’m-clueless act was going to drop panties? You wanna know about art?" You hurl the question; voice no longer shaky and unsure. "When the campus playboy starts touching my face on dimly lit spaces, and starts talking about my eyes, there's a word for it. There's an entire movement in the 20's—it's called surreal." You roll your eyes at him before making your exit.
It takes a minute for Jungkook to get his body to move. And when he does, you're already a distance away. Almost gone from his sight.
This is the second time today that you rendered him immobile and speechless. Just what the fuck did he do?
-
Meanwhile, you cursed at Jeon Jungkook on your entire walk home. Fuck him and his round innocent eyes for throwing the bees and butterflies in your stomach into chaos.
You tell yourself you dodged a bullet and that was just a ploy for him to get into your pants. You should actually congratulate yourself for turning away one of the notorious womanizers. Your roommate would be proud of you.
Still, you couldn't deny the jolt you felt in your chest when he touched your face and spewed those cheesy lines about your eyes.
You grunt as you slam the door to your dorm.
"Damn. Who pissed you off?" Jihyo, your roommate stares at you across her table.
You heave a sigh of exhaustion and plop yourself on the carpeted floor. "Had a run in with a frat guy," you spit with a scowl. "You remember the guy you were talking about last week? Jungkook? He's the model for this week."
"Seriously? That's..." Jihyo's head tilted sideways as she looked for the right word, brows furrowing. "Out of character for him."
You raise your head and prop your arms to face your roommate. "Right? That's what I thought, but Taehyung said he was interested in learning art."
At this, Jihyo pauses while eating and guffaws. "Is he for real?"
You roll your eyes at no one in particular and rest your head on your palms as your other hand plucks at the carpet. "Nah, I'm pretty sure he was just there to pick up girls."
Jihyo squints at you, suddenly alert as she senses something you haven't told her yet.
"He hit on me," you start. Already growing flustered at the recollection of the afternoon. "You know those cheesy lines from romcoms, he actually used them on me." You went on detail by detail about what happened and ended your story with a shudder. "This is the first time I might dread going to the class."
"Yep, I see why he thinks he could get away with the cheesiest line," Jihyo murmurs. Apparently, during your story, Jihyo picked up her phone and started to stalk Jungkook's profile. "I mean shame it wasn't nude because have you seen this body?" She flips her phone so you can see her screen.
"What? That's not Jungkook." You stand from your spot and walk closer to Jihyo and snatch the phone. "This isn't Jungkook."
"What are you talking about? That’s literally his profile,” Jihyo takes her phone back, wanting to take another look if you’re looking at the same thing. “See, Kim Jongkook. He’s the notorious fuck boy, probably in all departments. Good thing is, he’s graduating this year.”
Oh, fuck.
-
>> Still Untitled
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7ndipity · 2 months
Text
“Are You Confident?”
fwb!Jungkook x Plus Size Reader
Summary: The one where you get fed up with Jungkook’s teasing and decide to take him up on his offer.
Word Count: just under 1.7k
Warnings: +18 mdni, smut. oral(m. receiving), swearing, Jk starts out fuckboy-ish but turns subby, slight dom reader, reader’s referred to as Noona, not proofread
A/N: This idea has been sitting in my drafts since early December, but I finally managed to finish part one! This is sort of a prequel to this drabble, so if you can read it too if you liked this one. I’ll also be posting part two and a masterlist(hopefully)later this week, so lmk what you think!
Masterlist
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If you had to choose a favorite place in the whole world, you would choose Jungkook’s apartment without a thought. Not your own apartment, not you favorite shop, not even the dream vacation you’d been planning and saving up for forever, just being tucked into the corner of Jungkook’s couch, Bam curled up next to you, his massive head resting in your lap, subtly begging for pets as you vented to his owner about your most recent dating fiasco.
The guy one of your friends had set you up with had seemed nice enough at first, but as dinner progressed, things had progressively gone downhill.
“Did he least pay for dinner?” Jungkook asked, sprawled on the opposite end of the couch.
“I’d assume so, I walked out before the bill even came.” You replied, taking a long drink from your glass.
“Why do you even bother with dating anyway? You said before you hated it.” He asked.
“I’ve told you, I’m… lonely.” You said pointedly, avoiding his eyes.
He squinted at you, understanding suddenly flashing across his face.
“Ah, so you just need to get laid?” He asked, sitting back with a smirk as your face flushed with color. “Why didn’t you just say so? I could help you with that.”
“Ugh, shut up.” You groaned, getting up and heading to the kitchen.
“I’m serious.” He said, following you. “It’s better than fucking some random asshole.”
This type of conversation was a recurring thing in your friendship. Jungkook loved to tease you, and with a relationship that had grown as close as yours had, he had plenty of opportunities.
Your friends often joked that the two of you should just date already with the way you acted with each other, often toeing the line between what was typically considered okay for ‘just friends’. You’d slept in the same bed more times than you could count(a fact that had made Taehyung nearly choke on his drink when he’d found out), you’d even kissed at his friend's New Years Eve party after a few too many drinks and a similar conversation to the one you were currently having, lamenting about not having someone to kiss at midnight.
You didn’t know what had possessed you to do it, all you could remember was hearing the countdown and leaning in, connecting your lips with his for the briefest moment, only for him to quickly chase after yours when you had started to pull away.
Neither of you had brought it up afterwards, but the memory of it was permanently seared into your mind; the feel of his lips moving against yours, the way his hands had gently gripped your waist-
You shook your head, redirecting your attention back to the current moment, trying to ignore Jungkook as he leaned against the counter next to you.
“Look, if you don’t want to, that’s totally fine, I’m just offering a possible solution to your problem,” He said, shrugging as he grinned at you. “You know, if you’re really desperate.”
You scoffed. “You’re one to talk. When's the last time you even went on a date again?”
Your words had the desired effect on him, turning his expression sour.
“That’s different, I’ve been… busy.” He said grudgingly.
“Uh-huh, sure.” You grinned triumphantly.
“I mean it though,” He said. “If that’s really all you’re after, I’d be glad to help.”
You blinked at him in disbelief. “Seriously?”
“Yeah,” He shrugged. “I mean, like you said, it’s not like I've got anything going either. It doesn’t have to be a big deal, just two friends helping each other out.”
“That is, if you think you can handle me.” He added with a smirk.
You rolled your eyes, letting out an irritated laugh. “Please, I could handle you.”
“Are you confident?” He asked, quirking a brow at you.
“Yes.” You answered immediately, catching both him and yourself off guard as you stared him down.
Your words weren’t entirely true, you weren’t all that confident when it came to things like this, but Jungkook had a way of triggering your stubborn streak, whether it was with that cocky smile he always threw your way or the domineering tone he like to tease you with, something about him made you suddenly brave and willing to challenge anything he said.
Normally, that was part of what made your friendship fun, the two of you constantly bickering and at odds with each other, but this was much different than arguing over where to get dinner or what to watch on tv.
You were chest to chest now, able to feel his heart pounding surprisingly fast as he stared down at you.
“Prove it.” He said, his tone having lost its teasing edge as his gaze flickered between your eyes and your mouth.
That was all it took to make you break.
You closed the gap between the two of you, pushing him back against the wall as your lips clashed.
This wasn’t at all like the first time you’d kissed, there was no hesitancy or tender playfulness, it was hot and rushed and needy, full of tongue and teeth.
You were aware of a voice in the back of your head frantically screaming at you, something about how this was terrible idea and could ruin things between you and Jungkook completely, but you really couldn’t bring yourself to care as his warm hands found your waist, pulling you flush against him as his tongue fought with yours for dominance. He tasted sharp and sweet like the wine you had brought, his skin hot under your fingertips as your hands slipped from his shoulders to tangle in his hair, tugging lightly at the strands and earning a low grunt from him.
His grip on your hips tightened before sliding down to grope your ass, grinding you against the growing bulge in his pants.
A surprised squeak left you, making him chuckle against your lips as you mentally cursed yourself. You were not about to let him have the upper hand, not this quickly.
You slipped a hand down between you to palm him over his pants, squeezing just enough to cause what sounded very much like a moan to you to release from his throat, though you knew he’d tried to deny it.
Just as suddenly as you’d begun, you pulled away, making his eyes snap open in confusion.
“What are you-?” He panted, stopping in shock as you dropped to your knees in front of him.
“I’m helping you out.” You said simply, undoing his belt as you looked up at him with doe eyes. “Is that okay?”
He nodded, breathing unsteadily.
“I need words, Sweetie.” You said, making him flush at the petname as you fiddled with his zipper. “I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.”
“I want it,” He quickly blurted, giving up control with surprising ease as he stared down at you, eyes black with need. “I-I want your mouth, please.”
“Good boy.” You tugged his jeans down, revealing the prominent tent in his boxers, a small wet patch on the material showing just how eager he was.
“These are cute.” You commented, toying with the waistband before letting it snap back against his skin, making him jump slightly. “Purple looks good on you.”
“Noona, please.” He whined in frustration, his head falling back against the wall as his hips twitched forward involuntarily.
“Fine, since you’re asking so politely.” You pulled his boxers down, letting his cock spring free, hanging heavy in front of your face.
He was slightly bigger than you expected, the tip flushed deep red and leaking precum as you took him in your hand, making him shudder.
“Mm, should’ve known, even your cock’s pretty.” You mused, leaning in to give it a cursory lick, sucking the tip into your mouth for a moment before pulling back, leaving a few kisses along the underside of his length as you glanced up at him to gauge his reaction.
He was staring down at you slack-jawed, his breaths coming out in uneven pants as you pumped him with your hand.
He already looked slightly fucked out and you’d barely done anything to him yet, giving you a massive surge of confidence as you held eye contact with him, gathering as much spit as you could in your mouth before letting it dribble down over his twitching length.
“Fuck.” He muttered under his breath, squiming slightly.
Still holding his gaze, you took him fully into your mouth, sinking down as far as you could go.
“Fuck!” He gasped, his head falling back against the wall with a thump as you pulled back, swirling your tongue around him teasingly before sinking down again, letting him hit the back of your throat and holding him there for a moment before pulling off.
You quickly found your rhythm, bobbing your head up and down on him and using your hands on what wouldn’t fit in your mouth.
He let out a low whine, fists clenched so tight against his thighs his knuckles had gone white.
Noticing this, you used your free hand to guide his to your head, letting him tangle his fingers in your hair and giving him something to ground himself with.
All too soon, you felt him beginning to tense, his grip on your head tightening as his thighs started to shake.
“Fuck, ‘m gonna cum.” He whimpered. “Where do you want me to-?”
You only answer to him taking him and deeper and swallowing around him, making him cry out as his hip bucked forward, fucking your face as he chased his release.
“Shit, Y/n, I-” His words were choked off with a groan as he came, cumming down your throat in hot spurts.
He slumped back against the wall, breathing hard as you slowly pulled off of him, making a point to meet his eyes again as you swallowed.
“Shit, Y/n,” He said weakly as you stood back up. “That was-”
You cut him off with another kiss, feeling him twitch against your leg as he tasted himself on your tongue.
“I’m not done with you yet.”
Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @feminympho @a-gayish-unicorn @dfqcsqueen @ldysmfrst
515 notes · View notes
chryblossomjjk · 2 years
Text
practice (pt. 2) | jjk
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⇢ PAIRING: fuckboy!jk x inexperienced reader
⇢ RATING/GENRE: m/18+ | college au, fwb, smut, fluff, angst
⇢ WC: 8.1k
⇢ WARNINGS: implied family issues, photography major jk in full effect, casual titty sucking (lol), oral sex (f receiving), ass eating and motorboating?, handjob, unprotected sex (crowd boos and throws tomatoes), a bit of spanking, talk of sex toys, orgasm denial, forced orgasm, slight dom and sub oc, slight sub and dom jk, shower head as vibrator (everyone w a clit has done this pls-), some manhandling, anal play, shower floor sex !!!, very slight cum eating, creampie, oc reflects on how far she’s fallen, oc still hates men, maybe unrequited love, maybe not
⇢ SUMMARY: everything is wet. you and jungkook tangled up on the shower floor. your eyes afterwards.
⇢ NOTES: yOu’Re WeLcOmE rEaDeRs. this was only going to be a one shot but i was manipulated into making it a three part series bc of u all >:((! lol kidding love u babies! tbh i'm a bit disappointed with this piece. i really loved it when i outlined it but for some reason it just didn’t come together how i would’ve hoped. i tried my best guys rip. hopefully part three will be better. anyways, feedback is greatly greatly appreciated!! thank you again for all the engagement on part one if you’re new pls go read it and check out my masterlist here. ALSO HUGE THANK YOU TO MY BBY @here4btsfics FOR BETAING LEGIT COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT U!!
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⇢ SERIES MASTERLIST
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“You look miserable.”
You were miserable. 
The air at the frat party was suffocating. Sweaty bodies grinding against one another, nudging your shoulder as they shimmied by. The strobe lights made your vision splotchy and the blaring speakers had your head pounding. Plus, you could already feel the makeup sinking into your pores. An oil cleanse is needed asap.
“You look like a hot mess,” you snap at the boy in front of you. His stringy bangs stick to his clammy forehead, poking out from underneath his black bucket hat. The neck of his dark gray t-shirt is stretched to one side from the pull of petite, manicured fingers. Pink lip gloss is smeared across his lips, making a glittery trail down his neck. Sore red marks already blooming. “It’s late.”
“It’s only like-” Jungkook looks at his watch. “1 a.m.”
“Yeah, late. I have a test in the morning.”
“Go home.”
That was the problem. The two only people you really knew at the party, Mina and Taehyung, snuck off into a grimy bathroom to fuck eachother’s brains out. That was an hour ago. How long could they really go at it? You explain this to Jungkook with a sigh. “If they’re not back in the next twenty minutes, I’m going to flip.”
“Don’t be a buzzkill.” Jungkook chuckles, plopping down on the brown corduroy couch next to you. A drop of alcohol spills over the edge of his red solo cup, landing right on your bare thigh. “You can’t go by yourself?”
“I’m a woman, Jungkook.”
“Ah, right,” he nods, thumb brushing away the dark liquid on your skin before putting it in his mouth. Goosebumps form instantaneously as you watch in utter shock. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Bambi, but I don’t think a dude would touch you with a ten foot pole. You’re kinda fucking scary.”
You glare at him, fluffy brows furrowed into sharp slants. Deep scowl on your shiny pout.
“See?” He laughs, tattooed digits coming up to pinch the baby fat of your cheeks. “Come on, I’ll walk you home.”
“No,” you huff, slapping his hand away. The subtle touch was enough to feel how surprisingly soft his skin is. “I’ll go get Mina and Taehyung-” you scoof, getting up from the tattered material under you. 
“Chill.” His fingers catch the ruffled hem of your dress, knuckles brushing against the back of your thigh. 
The audacity.
“Let them do their thing. I’ll take care of you.”
“Aren’t you in the middle of-” your eyes flicker over to Nayeon, who had been attached to Jungkook’s neck all night prior. She’s on the opposite side of the room, swaying back and forth, watching him cautiously. No doubt wondering if the illusive man had slipped from her grasp, onto the next girl that caught his fleeting attention. “-A thing?”
“Nayeon is cool.” He glances over his shoulder, gnawing on the silver ring on the corner of his lip. He nervously rolls the material of your dress between his thumb and index finger. Your eyes widen at the motion. Why was he being so… handsy tonight? “She’ll understand.”
Even from a distance, you can see the disappointed glint in her eyes when he explains that he’s heading out for the night.
The air outside is much nicer. The wind brushes through the cracks in the trees, kissing the leaves with a seemingly soft gust. The brunt of the blow isn’t felt until the wind is gone, and the unsuspecting leaves slowly dwindle to the ground. Confused as to how something so delicate and graceful led to their demise.
“Ugh, fuck,” Jungkook snarls, sticking out his pink tongue after taking a sip of whatever drink he had been nursing. “Shit’s like battery acid.”
You giggle, turning your head to get a better look at him. He looks so pretty in the moonlight. Even prettier than usual, you think. Your eyes dart back to the sidewalk under your feet. 
“Here,” he passes the plastic cup towards you. “I can’t drink anymore.”
“Ew, I don’t want your backwash, Jeon.” You scoff, holding your balled fists to your chest in disgust. 
“I’ve been known to spit in a mouth every now and then… never had any complaints.”
God, he’s so crude. 
“I told you, I have a test to take.”
“Oh please,” he persists. “I take all my tests hungover.”
“What tests?” You surrender, finally accepting the poisonous drink. A quick whiff of the mysterious liquid confirms his earlier sentiments. It was most definitely battery acid. “You’re a photography major.”
“Chug! Chug! Chug!” Jungkook chants, pumping his fist in the air for emphasis.
“Stop peer pressuring me!” You say exasperatedly, words riddled with broken laughter. He’s so insufferably annoying but… weirdly adorable.
He continues, shouting louder until you down the drink in one big gulp, gagging at the putrid aftertaste. He cheers, no concern for the sleeping students who can surely hear his booming voice through their thin dormitory walls.
“I’m a bad influence on you. You’re turning into me.” 
“You wish.” 
“Not Bambi anymore, hm?” He takes his hat off, ruffling his hair before plopping it onto your head. “Gonna have to call you my baby.”
The breeze does nothing to ease the burning in your cheeks. “You’re an idiot, Jungkook.”
“Oh God… you sound like my parents,” he laughs. It wasn’t the one you had become accustomed to throughout your brief friendship. The high-pitched infectious one that always coaxed a similar sound out of you. 
This laugh was sarcastic. Devoid of joy.
“I’m so drunk that you look like ‘em too.” 
You glance up from the crushed cup. He looks… sad. You’ve never seen Jungkook sad, or even serious for that matter. His lips are pulled into a tight line, chin covered little dents as he tries to contain his emotions. 
Whatever he was feeling, you never want him to feel it again. 
“What do you mean?” 
“It’s nothing,” he shakes his head, back pressing against the entrance of your building, prepared to push it open for you. 
“It doesn’t sound like nothing,” you frown, halting your steps. You can’t leave until that heart wrenching expression stops tainting his features.
“My parents are like… old school,” he shrugs, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. “I was so sheltered growing up. I feel like I missed out on a lot and I just… they wanted me to go to law school. Can you believe that? Me? A lawyer?”
Jungkook was a person you never expected to relate to. Sure, you were casual friends, but you chalk that up to circumstance. He just so happened to be a friend of your roommate’s boyfriend. Your interactions up until this point had been playful banter. Nothing incredibly deep. 
Honestly, you didn’t even think he was capable of complex emotions.
You feel guilty about that now.
“They sound like mine,” you admit. “They completely tie my worth to my academic success.”
“But you’re good at that. Thinking.” His fingers tap against his temple before rubbing in soothing circles, trying to coax the cogs in his skull to spin. “You’re the most intelligent person I know and I’m not just saying that because I like you.”
“Thank you,” you peep. You’ve always suspected that Jungkook secretly hated you.
Hate is a strong word and you’re very dramatic.
But nothing about your lifestyles are parallel. They’re perpendicular, moving in two completely separate directions. Only crossing paths every now and then.
Too different and incompatible. 
“My brain doesn’t work like that- watch your step,” he warns, pointing at a divet between the concrete and tile as you finally step inside. 
“I don’t like to think. I like to see. I’m a visual person.” He’s talking with so much passion, hands moving about to show you what his words couldn’t. You watch in awe.
“They don’t get that. Like when I got these,” he holds his inked arm out for your viewing pleasures. “My dad bugged out. ‘You’ll never get a good job with those doodles on your arm.’”
His tone was so exaggerated that you couldn’t help but giggle, shoulder knocking against his as you walked. He laughs too.
“I don’t really give a shit about the future. I care about now. I want to experience everything I can, right now. To me, life is about living in the moment. Photography is literally like-” his eyes squint, darting around the hallway as he looks for the right words. “Like- snapshots of the present.”
He got so carried away that he didn’t realize you had reached your destination. You blink at him.
“I’m sorry.” he sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That was stupid,”
“No!” You lower your voice immediately, embarrassed at your sudden outburst. “I actually…” You pause, contemplating your next words.
“I wish I was m-”
“I want to be-”
You both pause this time. Jungkook nods his head towards you, giving you the green light to speak first.
“In some ways, I wish I was more like you.”
“Yeah.” He hums with a soft smile, leaning against your doorframe. So delicate and graceful. “I was gonna say the same thing.”
You gulp, completely and utterly rattled. Your shaky hands fiddle with your keys, struggling to fit them into the lock. 
Why are you so nervous all of a sudden? It’s just Jungkook.
He laughs, steadying your jittery hand with his own and helping you slot the metal in. 
“Thank you for walking me home,” you say meekly, avoiding eye contact as you enter the dark room. “For what it’s worth… I think your tattoos are really cool.”
“And I think you’re really cute when you’re flustered,” he smirks, backing away from the doorway and waving at you. “Goodnight, Bambi.”
Much to your dismay, the compliment makes your cheeks heat up.
“Jungkook, wait! Your hat!”
“Nah, keep it!” He shouts down the hallway. “It looks better on you anyway!”
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“Jungkook, stop,” you whine, back arching off your white cotton duvet. The soft tongue twisting around your nipple makes it incredibly difficult to focus on your cracked phone screen. “This episode is important. We meet Sailor Mars.”
“Sorry, Bambi,” He grunts, wet mouth reluctantly popping off your stiff bud. “Got distracted.”
It’s been a little under two month of this. Of you and him. 
Having sex, exchanging sweet words and touches, going back to just friends. Rinse and repeat. 
Blissful peaks and exhausting valleys. A rollercoaster of emotions with no logical endpoint in sight. You tried not to think about that part often though.
It was easy to distract yourself from the truth when Jungkook brought you lunch during the gap in his classes, or when he agreed to watch Sailor Moon in its entirety without much pushing. Atleast you could pretend he was yours in those little moments of affection.
You huff, pulling the crumpled t-shirt, his t-shirt, back over your chest. Your heart was still pounding from your last round an hour or so ago, and him casually sucking on your nipple while streaming a cartoon didn’t help.
“She’s your favorite?” He questions, propping his head up on the heel of his hand as he lays on his side. You nod, gaze flickering over to him. His previous activities had made his teddy bear headband slouch forward. You use one of the plush brown ears to pull it back into place.
Although sweet and attentive, Jungkook wasn’t immune to the innate disadvantages that came with being a man. 
Like not knowing how to wash his face properly. 
You watched in horror a couple weeks ago as scrubbed his face in your bathroom sink. Bangs and all. An order for a cute bear headband, the same brand as your kitty ones, was placed immediately. The way he smiled when you gave it to him would forever be burned into your memory.
“Makes sense,” he hums. “Mars is the planet of war.”
You side-eye him, knowing exactly what he was implying with that snide comment. “Just watch the show, Jeon.”
“I am.” His wavering attention turns back to your phone. “I love 90's animation. It was basically all done by hand, see?” He points at the scene behind Usagi; a blue watercolor sky fading into a baby pink. Clearly hand drawn. It was a detail you never noticed before.
“And the saturation is higher so the colors look brighter.”
“Your major is showing,” you say, using an eye roll to suppress the smile dancing on your lips. You don’t want to disturb the hydrating sheet mask on your face, resting in just the right position. You also don’t want to clue him in on how cute you find his artistic rambles.
“Speaking of that,” he laughs, resting his cheek against your chest, unable to stay in one position for too long. He’s like that in the bedroom too. You sigh as dry bits of his face mask crumble off his temple and onto the black fabric. Baby steps. “You’re still coming to the showcase, right?
Jungkook’s big end-of-semester project was to create a photography portfolio on a topic of his choosing. There was going to be a cute little gallery event to display the work of him and his classmates. It was hard not to get your hopes up when he invited you. 
That was a sign that maybe, just maybe, the feeling was mutual. Right?
“Right,” you answer him curtly. “Now tell me what topic you picked, demon.” 
“Nah, you’ll have to be a good girl and wait,” he grins teasingly, lifting up to steal an airy peck. “Besides, I need to get one more sho-”
Ding.
“Thank fuck!” He groans, springing up at the sound of your timer. “This feels like sandpaper. What the fuck are you doing to my face?”
“Oh, don’t be a baby,” you scold, pressing pause and tossing your phone onto your bed. He’d have to meet your favorite character some other time, clearly too distracted and antsy tonight to focus. 
“Bambi,” he says indignantly, pointing straight ahead at Mina’s floor mirror with wide doe eyes. His skin is cracked and painted gray. The reflection is startling to the skincare newbie. “Look at how dry this shit is!”
“Jungkook, it’s supposed to look like that. It’s a clay mask.” You laugh, peeling your more gentle one off and tossing it into the little trash bin near your nightstand. “You have oily skin, so it’ll help clear out your pores and reduce excess sebum production.”
“I don’t even know what that means,” he laughs, climbing out of bed and rolling his shoulders, arms numb from laying down too long. He’s topless. You can’t help but eye the way his back muscles pop out with every circular motion. 
How yummy. 
“Do you mind if I hop in the shower?”
He doesn’t need to ask. Jungkook has become a permanent fixture in your dorm, like the color pink or your twin bed. Whenever Mina is gone, he’s there. 
His presence is also similar to your bed in the sense that it doesn’t extend past the four walls of your room and mind.
A bed is warm, though. Comforting. And you long for it when you’re not in it.
That longing leads your wandering feet into the steamy bathroom.
“Jungkook,” you peep softly, knocking gently on the glass door before sliding it open. “Can I join you?”
The unexpected noise makes him jump, a large palm hitting his bare chest with a wet smack. Once his mind registers the sound as your voice though, his body language softens. Your voice so sweet and melodic in his ears. “I would never turn down an opportunity to see your tits. Wet.”
‘You could see them more often if you just fell in love with me already,’ you think to yourself, peeling off your cherry-printed thong and oversized shirt before stepping into the warm shower. 
He looks so dreamy in the sauna of your shower.
Your pupils pause when they land on the unbelievably minuscule nipples that you always tease him for. His cheeks and chest are a soft baby pink. Your favorite color. Whether it’s from the scalding water or him nailing you into the rickety mattress earlier, you can’t tell. All the fog makes him look even more heavenly than usual, like an angel descending from the clouds.
You’re down bad. 
There’s a speck of clay still on his chin, covering that little brown freckle you love so much. You cup the side of his face, thumb swiping away the leftover mask. He leans into your palms, lips chasing your finger to press a soft kiss on the pad of it.
Why must he make things so difficult for you?
 “I got it,” he mumbles, snatching the pink face cloth from your hand and reaching for what his peanut brain thinks is body wash. 
“Jungkook, that’s shampoo.” 
“What? No way,” he shakes his head confidently, picking up the slippery green bottle and reading the label with squinted eyes. 
You were right, of course.
“Oh, I fucked up then” He smells like lavender and mint. The scent fills your nostrils when he grabs the actual body wash from the bamboo wall shelf, suctioned to the tile near your head. It's the same fragrance of your very fancy, very expensive, shampoo. 
You glance at the bottle. It’s nearly empty. 
“Jungkook! You’re such an idiot!”
“It’s not that deep, Bambi. Relax,” he chuckles nonchalantly.
“It’s not funny!” Read the shower, Jeon. Haircare is no laughing matter. You cross your arms over your chest, titty-viewing privileges revoked until further notice. “That stuff is expensive, Jungkook. It’s Paul Mitchell...”
“Not Paul Mitchell,” he humors you, bottom lip jutting out dramatically. His shiny silver lip ring and eyebrow piercing do nothing to aid his faux innocence. “I’ll buy you another bottle, I promise. I used it because it reminds me of you. Smells so good.”
Jungkook squeezes the soap onto the pink cloth before running it over your body, lathering the vanilla-scented bubbles on your skin. Hands caressing every part of you so gently, as if you’re the most fragile thing he’s ever dealt with. Afraid to break you in his careless and clumsy palms.
He’s cleaning you so tenderly that it makes your lovesick heart pound.
He’s diligent too, squatting down awkwardly to wash your manicured toes, balancing your foot on top of his knee. He lets out an airy laugh when your foot jerks under his sneaky tickling fingers. 
Even on your most intimate parts, his touch stays pure and delicate. He cups your breasts, cleaning under them and around them. The damp cotton barely ghosts over your nipples. He’s never been shy to pinch, suck, or even bite them before. It doesn’t feel right to him in this context though. He doesn’t want to make you uncomfy or ruin the moment by doing or saying something dirty. 
Sometimes, Jungkook makes you feel so… important. So cared for. 
You cling to him when he washes your back, wrapping your arms around him and nuzzling your face into the solid surface of his chest. You stay like that for a moment. Holding eachother under the warm stream of the shower. Savoring it while he’s still with you like this.
Blissful peaks.
The gentle swirls and shapes he draws against your skin lulls you into a trance. All you can hear is his heart beating. 
It’s so close but so out of reach. 
You count the seconds between the faint thumps. So distracted and content that your ears block out the sharp sounds of water hitting tile. All you hear is him.
Jungkook. Jungkook. Jungkook.
A quick swat to your ass brings you back to reality. 
You peep out a small moan, jolting forward from the impact. 
“You like when I do that,” he deduces, the corner of his lip pulling into a crooked smirk as he massages your stinging behind. “When I have my way with you. Don’t you, Bambi?”
You nod, cheek still smushed into his wet chest. How humiliating.
“You’re a lot more submissive than I thought you’d be.”
“You thought about me before we started hooking up?” You counter, voice taking on a teasing tone to hide the flutter in your chest. He wanted you too. The thought was reassuring.
“Mm, maybe.” His hardening cock, brushing right against your inner thigh, tells you the answer. “The version of you in my head was confident, though. Knew what she wanted and took it.”
He whispers the last part, gaze floating down to your lips and licking his bottom one in preparation. The telltale signs of an incoming smooch. You close your eyes, expecting a sweet kiss-
“I get that you’re still learning how to fuck,” he shrugs. “So no biggie.”
Asshole. He's taunting you.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” 
“It’s not a bad thing…” he coos, patronizingly. “Just the Bambi I know would never let a man tell her what to do.”
Any implication of you being compliant and passive, especially to a male counterpart, would normally send you into a rampage. He never understood how someone so kind could also be so viscous. When angry, you were comparable to a fire-breathing dragon, destroying villages and burning people alive with your blazing articulate tongue. Jungkook would never tell you that though, lest you think he was calling you ugly and reptilian.
That couldn’t be further from the truth, because he found it so fucking sexy when you were mad. And the bubbles of irritation were already brewing in your stomach.
You’re falling right into his trap.
“I don’t,” you argue through gritted teeth. “And I always take what I want.”
“That’s not true,” Jungkook tutts his tongue at you. “You want me so bad and you haven’t done anything about it.”
Your heart drops. Is it that obvious you have a big fat crush on him?
“Why don’t you show me a little bit, then?” He huffs, voice pleading and whiny. He grabs your hand and guides it around his semi-hard member, engulfing your’s in his tattooed one. “Touch me how you want.”
Oh, he meant sexually. You let out a sigh of relief. 
Even partially soft, his cock feels heavy in your hand. Your fingertips barely meet around the shaft, pink mushroom tip poking out of your tiny fist. Two months. Two months of seeing his cock every three to five business days, and you’re still intimidated by the sheer size of him. How could you not be? He was massive.
He knocks his wet forehead against yours. His gaze is trained on his growing cock, tongue fiddling with his lip ring as he focuses. So visual.
Hm. It could be fun to take control. Especially when he was practically begging for it. 
Jungkook prefers to be the pleasing partner. Foreplay usually consists of him licking and touching every square inch of you until you’re squirming. You’ve never seen him so needy and desperate before.
Most dicks were ugly. Monstrous even. In the flesh, you’ve seen a whopping total of three penises throughout your lifetime, Jungkook’s included. A small sample size for your age. But you’ve watched enough porn to know that they were anything but aesthetically pleasing.
You’ve always been drawn to the finer, pretty things in life.
And his is so so pretty.
It’s not overly vascular. The veins running along his shaft are subtle, you can only feel them when you give him a hard tug. His skin is smooth and supple. Pelvis clean-shaven. Despite his little skincare mishaps, you can know he takes good care of himself. It’s a quality you found extremely attractive. 
Languidly stroking up, you twist your wrist over the swollen tip. Your grip isn’t as tight as he likes and you know it, purposely dragging over the upward curve with an unbearably loose fist. The running water makes the glide easy as you pump him languidly, stopping at the crown and squeezing to give him a little relief. 
He peeps out a dreamy sigh when a pearl of dew leaks out of the slit. You coo at the sight, using your thumb to smear the wetness around his sensitive head.
A dirty Jungkook-type thought pops into your head.
“Put it in your mouth,” you command, holding your glistening digit in front of his big nose. 
He hesitates for a moment. It’s fair. You were literally asking him to taste his own precum. His black pupils dart to your thumb, over to your face, and then back to your thumb. 
Has he never done this before?
He’s apprehensive, but fiercely competitive to the core. Never one to turn down a challenge. You’ve known that since you met him, when he nearly had a meltdown over losing a simple game of beer pong. 
He takes the pad of your thumb into his pink pucker, sucking on it like a sugary lollipop. His lustful eyes lock onto yours when his tongue just barely grazes over your skin. They’re pleading, so desperate for your approval. 
“Good boy… now spit.”
You feel his cock twitch against your stomach, wet tip leaving a sticky trail to your belly button. He obliges, letting a string of spit land in your palm. You hum contently, wrapping your hand around his shaft again. Coating him in his own saliva. 
“I love that,” he moans out, voice so turned on that you have to clench your thighs together for friction. They’re already clammy with arousal.
“Love what?” You tease. “Praise or my hand?”
“Both,” he admits with no hesitation, hips recoiling and subtly thrusting into your palm. He slicks back his bothersome bangs to get a better view. 
He looks so good with his forehead out.
“Does that feel good?”
He nods halfheartedly, tunnel-visioned in on the way you’re just fucking milking him. The nasty wet clicking noises filling the air only make his impending orgasm build up quicker. Jungkook has always prided himself on his stamina, but he’s already feeling that overwhelming pooling in his balls.
“Are you gonna cum?”
“Yeah, Bambi...” He sighs, mouth dropping when he’s done speaking. Thick brows knitting together. Face contorting in the way it always does when he’s about to bust.
 You tug him hard and fast until he’s teetering on the point of no return-
And then you stop.
The muscles at the base of his cock contract and expand, making it bounce up against his pelvis. The creamy skin at the base transitions into a vibrant flush at the tip. So swollen and angry. So ready to cum.
“Fuck!” He shouts, slamming the side of his fist against the tile wall, snarled teeth look too ferocious to be bunny-like. The hooded gaze he shoots you is scary, even angrier than his cock. 
It looks painful.
You feel bad, truly.
But it was a small glimpse of the pain you felt when he blue-balled your love and affection.
“I cum first,” you taunt with a smirk, pressing a gentle peck on his lips. He doesn’t reciprocate, pout cemented in a firm straight line. “Then you.”
His tattooed knuckles sneak under your wet hair, curling around the back of your neck. The other is grips on your shoulder, trimmed nails digging into the delicate skin as he shoves you forward. You gasp, bouncing breasts squished against the shower door, cool slippery glass brushing against sensitive nipples. 
Jungkook usually takes the lead during sex, gently coaching you through the motions until you’re both silly-smiled and starry-eyed in post orgasm bliss. You’ve never seen him so domineering. A sharp juxtaposition to the whiny boy who was desperately seeking words of affirmation a few minutes ago.
His duality has you embarrassingly wet.
“I’m sorry,” he grunts, nuzzling into your shoulder and placing a few gentle, apologetic pecks on your skin. “I don’t mean to be so abrasive.”
Abrasive.
That was a big word, for him atleast. His vocabulary has expanded a bit. The thought makes you gleam. 
“You’re just-” The words are broken off by an airy chuckle. “I’m so fucked.”
There’s no time for you to mull over the hidden meanings of his words. He nudges your legs apart with his knee, muscular thigh pressing right into your sopping sex. You moan at the contact, grinding down on it until it’s rudely snatched away. 
“Isn’t someone greedy?” His voice is muffled, lips preoccupied with kissing a messy trail down your spine before dropping to his knees behind you. Right on the shower floor. “You’ve already cum. Twice.” 
You had sex just a few hours. And he did indeed, make you cum twice. Once on his fingers and once around his cock.
It wasn't enough, though. Never enough with him.
“Want more...”
“I know you do, just…” His words dissipate when spreads one cheek to the side, distracted by the mesmorising sight of your glistening slit and puckering hole. “Stay still. Let me look at you.”
The lack of sensory information has you on edge. From your position, you can’t see him. Only catching blurry glimpses of a tattooed arm when it extends into your field of vision. It’s hard to hear the nasty declarations that pour out of his mouth over the pitter-patter of water. There’s no perceptible clues that help you predict his next movements. You have to wait until you feel them.
His big hands knead your skin, making the fatty parts jiggle with his thumbs resting under each cheek. “Wow…” he peeps in admiration before shoving his entire face in your ass, vigorously shaking his head side to side. 
He’s so lewd.
You squeak when his sneaky tongue pokes out.
“No…”
“Why?” 
“That’s so… dirty.” You don’t mean you, of course. Even in the drunkest of states, you could execute a ten step skincare routine flawlessly, facial rollers and all. You were referring to the act.
“I mean… we’re kinda past that, don’t you think?”
You hum a contemplative noise. He had a point.
“Don’t you like it, baby?” A soft kiss is placed against the cinched muscle. “When I play with you like this?”
Baby.
He hasn’t called you that since he walked you home from the party. Your stomach somersaults. 
“I love it,” you confess with a sigh.
“Then why is it dirty? I’m just making you feel good, aren’t I?” He coos, placing the pad of his thumb on the untouched area. There’s no pressure behind it, just light strokes around the rim. “I can make you feel so good, if you just let me do what I want.”
What he’s implying is nerve-wracking. Anal play was something you never even considered dabbling in.
“I’ll be gentle, I promise.”
You trust him and you’re consumed by lust, so you give a small nod. 
“I need to hear you say it.”
“Do whatever you want, Koo… anything.”
There’s a sharp exhale and then soft fingers massaging tight circles on your clit. You relax into the touch. A tried and true method of making you feel good, and hopefully, ease you into the uncharted waters with little tension. Jungkook lets a string of spit fall between your cheeks, knowing you’ll need the extra lubrication. 
“Fu- hmm,” you hum through curled lips when his thick thumb slowly prods in, only up to the first knuckle. It’s not as painful as you expected. A little strange and unfamiliar, but the stretch was oddly pleasurable. “S’ good.” 
“No one has ever been in here before, right? Only me?”
“Only you.” You mewl, grinding back into his hand. The confession makes him moan. The thought of defiling you, ruining you, does things to him and to his leaking cock. 
“Maybe if you’re good, I’ll get you a butt plug.” He pauses, before adding an afterthought. “A small one with a pink gem.”
You don’t respond, enjoying the feeling of his hand too much to speak.
“Yeah,” he hums to himself. “Gonna double dip you one of these days.”
“Koo,” you whine. “Please do something.”
He can’t deny you. Not when there’s those dreamy, desperate hues in your voice. Jungkook spins, sitting on the ground before shuffling backwards until his back is against the shower door. Positioned directly between your legs. Right under your leaking cunt.
“Ride my face,” he whimpers. “Please…”
In your limited experience, and via the data you’ve collected from third-party sources (Mina), guys only ever beg to receive oral sex. 
But Jungkook is different. Here he was, fully prepared to devour your pussy like it’s his last meal on death row.
Hopefully the crime committed isn’t breaking your heart.
“Jungkook, you don’t- fuck!” His mouth is on you before you can even finish the sentence. Toned arm wrapped around your thigh, pulling you down onto his thirsty tongue like you’re a refreshing drink on a hot summer day.
The cool metal of his lip ring brushing against your outer lips as he delivered long unhurried licks between them, had your thighs trembling. You were so worked up and he’s barely even touched you.
The position is great, amazing even, but it’s hard to hold him like you want. You twist awkwardly reaching behind you and letting your fingers trace the outline of his sharp jaw. You can literally feel his tongue working under the skin, collecting as much of your sweet dew as possible before swallowing it in big gulps. 
The combination of your juices and the running water makes Jungkook-
“Feel like I'm drowning,” he laughs, sending hot breaths into your core. 
You peep an apology before standing on your toes, trying to create some breathing room.
“I didn’t tell you to stop.” His free hand grabs your ass, fingertips digging into the plush surface as he pulls you back down. The motion makes his large nose brush against your clit, bulbous tip sneaking under the hood, tickling your most sensitive spot.
“Fuck, baby.” you whine, already feeling a sticky hot climax approaching.
“Don’t be shy.” The thick thumb, still hooked inside of you, begins rocking back and forth, moving your hips in tandem. Encouraging you to grind onto his face. “Use me.”
Despite the assertive facade, you were deeply insecure. You’ve never felt more liberated, more comfortable, than when Jungkook’s hands were on you, though. Caressing every undesirable part of you. Touching you in ways that made you swoon. Completely worshiping you. 
With that in mind, you build up the courage to move freely. Humping his face like you do your pillow when you’re alone and needy for him.
You find yourself saying this often with Jungkook, but you’ve never felt so good.
There’s little muffled moans under the sound of the shower. Between the wet strands of hair, you can see his thick brows pulled in at the middle. Features contorted to form that cute little yummy face he makes every time he eats good food. Or in this case, your pussy.
You giggle deliriously, gently pushing back his wet tresses. They’re silky and pliant from your conditioner. Your thumb smoothes over one of his brows in an attempt to tame the angry arch. Afraid to hurt him, you stop immediately when you feel his piercing. 
The look he gives you when he peers up at you sends you spiraling. There’s something so raw behind his eyes.
It almost looks like…
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You shout when your orgasm washes over you, hips jerking wildly and uncontrollably. Powerful waves of pleasure run through you. One after the other in rapid succession, leaving your legs shaking and your petite fingers clawing at his scalp. 
He doesn’t stop until you make him, with a fistful of hair and a rough yank. Wet lips smacking together as he coos, taking in the sight of the overstimulated body before him. You feel empty when he removes his thumb from your sore hole and climbs to his feet.
“Your mouth,” you whine. “It’s too much.”
“I know,” he hums in agreement, hugging you from behind before continuing with an airy chuckle. “Nayeon told me that I have an oral fixation.”
Nayeon.
Your heart drops at the mention of her name. 
Why was he thinking about Nayeon? Especially now, when he was being intimate with you-
‘Don’t overthink it,’ you tell yourself. It was probably just a flippant comment he made without thinking…
“Oh no,” Jungkook groans dramatically, tattooed hand scrubbing over his face in frustration.
“What’s wrong?” You ask, craning your neck to look at him.
“I only brought one condom,” he says in distraught, emphasizing the one like it was the biggest mistake of his life.  “And we already used it.”
Hm. Now seems like a good time to ask him the question you’ve been avoiding for weeks.
“Are you sleeping with anyone else?”
An eerie pause fills the air. You don’t like the way he hesitates.
“No… I always use protection anyways… and I just got tested last week.”
You don’t like the way he answers. Almost like he didn’t want to lie, but he didn’t necessarily want to admit the truth either.
You don’t push the matter further. You're afraid that if you do, he’ll drift away. Float onto the next shiny, less complicated, thing that catches his wandering eyes. 
“It’s okay. Just fuck me, Jungkook.”
“Are you sure?” He looks at you with wide, sparkly eyes. They appear almost animated, hand drawn in the same style as your favorite cartoon. “We don’t have to. I would never-”
“I want to.”
You just want him. 
“Are you on the pill?”
“Mhm.” 
He exhales a sigh of relief, head dropping to thank whatever higher power exists for making this happen. The stars aligned to make this happen. He gets to fuck you now. Raw.
When his hands land on your ass, they’re shaky and unorganized. You can’t tell if it’s from adrenal of excitement. His cock is at the perfect angle to slot between your cheeks without the help of his hands. Jungkook pushes them together, rutting his hips into the tight squeeze, moaning softly when his pink tip pokes out at the top. 
“No more teasing,” you huff with a pout.
“Put me in then, sweetheart.”
Another term of endearment. You wonder if he’s doing it on purpose. If he knows how you feel about him and is levying that affection against you. Using sweet words to lull you into any situation of his choosing.
You sigh, reaching between your legs. His couch is so touch-starved from the foreplay, the orgasm you denied him, that the contact makes it jump. You rub the engorged head over your clit, flicking it up and down over the swollen nub.
“Thought you said no teasing.” He gruffs, strained and fucked out.
You nod in response, licking your lips as you guide him to your entrance. His heart beating so sternly in his chest that you can feel his pulse in the crown of his cock. So turned out and it’s all because of you.
Your mouth forms an ‘o’ shape when he slides in slowly. You’re both so wet from the shower and your own arousals, that there’s barely any resistance. Just a smooth glide until he’s buried to the hilt. Hushed, needy gasps escaping from both of you.
“Ah- fuck,” he grunts, hips jolting forward even though there’s no more length to give, pelvis mushing into you. You have to brace yourself with flat palms to prevent your head from knocking into the glass. “I’m in love with this pussy…”
The sweet, filthy words make you clench around him.
Jungkook watches with parted lips as he pulls out. Top lip twitching in a snarl when he sees how creamy and shiny you made his cock. You always do, but this is the first time he’s actually witnessing it, feeling it, without any barrier.
“My favorite pussy…” he whispers, gripping your waist as leverage before he starts pounding into you. Closing his eyes to focus on his rhythm, savoring the way your warm, wet, natural ridges feel on his cock
Even from behind, his curve does wonders on your g-spot. The smooth underside deliciously strokes that sweet spot with every deep plunge. Your breasts bounce when his hips crash into yours, making the very tips of your nipples teasingly brushing against the wet glass. The coolness sends tingles through your burning skin.
“When can I really play with you?” He pants. “Use my vibrator until you’re cumming buckets, huh?”
“Whenever we stay at yours…”
He doesn’t respond, leveling you with a simple hum instead.
“Nah, I prefer going to the girl’s place-” Jungkook had slurred to Taehyung, projecting his voice over the static of the party. Loud enough for your unsuspecting ears to pick up the sound. “I feel bad for asking them to leave after, so it just makes things easier.”
That was before you started hooking up, but the memory still stings.
A lightbulb turns on Jungkook’s brain as he watches the running water hit your back. He reaches for the shower head, clicking the silver lever three notches to the left. Jet mode.
The ugliest sob rips though your chest when he places it directly on your clit.
“Jungkook!” The stream is so powerful that it sends you into a panic.  “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t!”
“Yes, you can,” his lips are smushed to your temple, trying to shush your cries. “Gotta practice for the Hitachi, don’t you baby?”
The constant stimulation from the water and his cock makes your orgasm build up much quicker than anticipated. There’s wetness on your cheeks. It's not from the splashing water pummeling directly into your clit. You feel so euphoric and overstimulated that you’re crying. There’s nothing you can do to stop the unbearable pleasure that’s coursing through your veins. 
You nearly blackout when you cum. Vision blurry. Hearing fading in and out. Legs giving out underneath you. Jungkook has to catch you, abruptly dropping the shower head to wrap his big arms around your waist before you plummet to the ground in bliss.
When you can support yourself again, he hangs up the forgotten metal, maneuvering you around until you’re facing him. He picks you up with an inked arm hooked under your thighs, free hand grazing over your back in soothing circles.
“I didn’t push you too far, did I?” He asks worriedly.
You shake your head. He did, but you absolutely loved it. You peep when you feel the tip of his cook, still achingly hard, against your backside. “What about you?”
“Don’t worry.”
“No,” you protest. “Want you to cum too.”
He looks at you, gnawing on his bottom lip like he’s contemplating something. “I’ll be quick.”
Jungkook lays you down on the shower floor gently, the same way he does on your twin bed. A grimace laces through your features. Over the last month, you’ve been swamped with homework, putting a wedge in your normal routine. The last time you cleaned out the shower was two whole weeks ago.
Disgusting.
All complaints are forgotten when he’s inside of you, though. You would brace the bacteria and germs to have Jungkook between your legs. 
“You’re so pretty,” he huffs, admiring the way your hair fans out across the white porcelain. Leaning forward, Jungkook presses his entire weight on top of you, nuzzling his head into your shoulder. There’s a gust of wind on your shoulder as he breathes in your scent. 
The whole atmosphere feels different.
The slow sensual grind of his hips makes you dizzy. You swear you’re hallucinating when you feel his hands graze up your arms, fingers interlocking with yours. 
“Look at me.”
You crane your neck, wide eyes meeting his hooded ones. You breath hitches in your throat when you take in his expression. He’s looking at you the same way he did earlier.
If you didn’t know better, you would say he’s looking at you like he’s in love with you.
“I’m close,” he whispers, nudging his forehead against yours. He kisses you so delicately. There’s no heady teeth or rushed tongues. Just a sweet, soft kiss. “Where do you want it?”
“Inside.”
When he cums, it’s gentle and low. His hips never falter from their slow pace like they usually do when he climaxes. He doesn’t moan lewdly or say anything dirty. He just stays clung to you, panting softly until he rides out his high.
You feel so warm and happy when he fills you up. 
He stays on top of you while he catches his breath. You don’t mind, petite hands scratching over his back. Listening to the calming, rain-like sounds of the shower.
“Do you want to go to bed?” You peep after a few minutes.
“I can’t sleepover tonight, Bambi,” he coos, sitting back on his knees. You feel empty when he pulls out.  “I have a test tomorrow.”
“Oh… well, you’re still coming over tomorrow, right? So can we finish the season?” You question, recalling the pinky promise he made you last week.
“Raincheck,” he pouts. “I have something to do for one of my classes.”
You follow him to the door once you’re both dried off and dressed.
“Goodnight,” he places a dramatic kiss on the top of your head, pulling away with a little ‘muah’ sound. Something in the corner of your room catches his eye before he leaves. “Did you steal my hat?”
Your eyes follow his finger, pointing straight to the black bucket hat on your desk.
“You gave it to me.”
“I did?” He looks at you in confusion. “I don’t remember that.”
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“Fuck off,” you groan, cocooning your blanket over your disturbed ears. You wanted nothing more than to rewatch Sailor Moon and mope, but the fireworks would not fucking stop. Where is campus police? And why are they letting dumb frat boys light off explosives?
You sigh, watching Usagi and Rei fight over Tuxedo Mask again. You know what the outcome will be. The thought of your favorite character falling victim to the unforgiving strain of unrequited love makes your heart hurt.
You tilt your head. Tuxedo Mask kinda looks like someone you know. 
The show was supposed to be distracting, make you forget the fact that you got stood up but a guy you’ve been crushing on for months. But even your alone time has become daunting. Consumed by him. Everything reminds you of Jungkook. 
Jungkook. Jungkook. Jungkook.
You sigh, closing out the app in favor of scrolling through Instagram. The first picture you see on your feed is of Nayeon. Just your luck.
It was posted two minutes ago. You recognize the ugly brown couch in the background. She’s clearly at a party, form-fitting black mini dress complimenting her figure perfectly. 
Your self-loathing mind guides your self-loathing fingers to zoom in on every little detail and compare yourself to her. Pretty hair. Perfect makeup. Tiny waist that curves out into her full hips. Long legs. Jungkook. Straight, pearly white teeth. Nice jawline-
Jungkook?
You do a double take, eyes scanning the photo until they land on him again. He’s lingering in the background, back against the wall, looking down at his phone. You stay zoomed in on him for a while, staring at your phone screen until your vision goes blurry. 
Every doubt and insecurity you’ve harbored over the last few months hits you in a drowning, suffocating wave. 
Exhausting valleys.
Why did you even agree to this? This stupid friends with benefits relationship.
You knew you would get hurt, but you didn’t think it would hurt this bad. Not only did he lie to you, he was with Nayeon.
Nayeon. You can’t fucking stand her-
You shake your head furiously and throw your phone to the foot of your bed. 
You don’t mean that…
Since when were you the type to hate another woman over a dumb guy? Or have unprotected sex? Or let someone so careless and selfish infiltrate your heart and mind?
How could you compare yourself to Nayeon when you two are in the exact same position?
You think about the night you fell for him, when he walked you home in the moonlight. She must have felt the same you do now. You’re similar in your desire to be with him, knowing you'll get hurt in the end.
Because being with Jungkook for a little while was better than not being with him at all.
It’s his eyes. They’re dark but so tender. The way they look at you like you’re the only thing that matters. The way they glow when he talks about things that interest him. Or how they dart up towards his forehead when he can’t find the right words to say-
“__?” Mina calls, standing in the doorway with a takeout bag. You hadn’t even noticed her come in.  “Why are you crying?”
“Huh?” You peep, eyes fluttering down to the little wet spots on your blanket. 
Without even realizing it, you had grown to love Jungkook so much. 
You spent the rest of the night sobbing in Mina’s arms.
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© chryblossomjjk 2022 [do not copy, translate or repost]
6K notes · View notes
kookslastbutton · 1 year
Text
prove it to me ༓ jjk (m)
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✑ Summary: "I'm not your baby Jungkook. Remember that." Those are the words you say right before jumping into a one night stand with Jeon Jungkook, the man who's constantly annoying you with his college fling stories. You decide maybe just this once you'll play into his game and prove that he's no more average than the rest.
Pairing: fuckboy!jungkook x fem!reader
AU/genre: PWP, smut, humor, fluff, one-sided e2l, friend of friends, oneshot (for now?)
Rating: M, 18+
Word Count: 5.3k+
Warnings: arguing, swearing, sexual tension, denial of feelin’s, kook’s kind of an @$$ but he got some truth to him, oc's jaded & not buying into kook's bs, myg being a good friend then ditching lmao, kook likes calling oc petnames, kook is bunny boy
sexually explicit content: dom!jk, switch sub!reader, semi-awkward first kiss, unprotected s*x (pls stay safe everyone!!), teasing, foreplay, dirty talk, some manhandling, rough sex, t*itty suck, f*ngering, penetration, cunnilingus, doggy, multiple orgasms (f. receiving), kooks calls her pretty girl, some degradation/dumbification (sl*t calling) & oc has bit of an actual dumby moment but she's still fairly rigid, but not a full brat? Lmao idk
Now playing: Monster in me, Breakfast, LOUD
A/N: ahdjsj?c it's here! 👉👈 a thousand apologies that this is out way later than planned! Uni getting most of my time 😟 But its here and I'm so pumped to share it with you guys!! Hope you enjoy 😗💕
Taglist:
@marcoazz2 @demiec0re @jcrl99 @muah-minhoe-8 @whoa-jo @jeongukkieeeeeeee @sweet4jenni @chanjwl @kimtaesss @jexizia @vexstrils @notchia @dollypoetry @cherrysoulth @burnahtsw @icantpickabiasugh @megaamonn
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Jung freaking kook. Just look at him sitting over there, half-naked and wet. Sure, he’s got a towel thrown over a shoulder but it’s so small it’s doing fuck all to dry him off. Obviously he chose it on purpose. He thinks he’s such hot shit but you think he looks like a drowned rat.
And look! He’s got Namjoon’s apartment floor drenched with the pool water he tracked in! Man, if this was your place you’d be handing him a nice mop and bucket right about now.
"They were begging me to go a fourth round, but I was winding down, y'know?" Jungkook's voice echos obnoxiously off the walls. You mentally roll your eyes. He’s got a big mouth too. This must be your twentieth time hearing the same spiel about his little rendezvous with two chicks during undergrad. News flash Jungkook, you're not a god!
The guys are into it, though. You scan the room. Hoseok's on the verge of drooling, and Jimin can't stop grinning. Namjoon and Seokjin are leaning back in their seats, slight smirks pulling at the corners of their mouths. And Taehyung? Don't even get started on him. The man excused himself for the bathroom about ten minutes ago and is still yet to return.
Men. You decided to spend your one free Saturday with men.
You should have accepted Soyeon's offer to go drinking instead. This was the downside of being one of the only females in this so-called "friend group". None of your girlfriends were here! Sure, other women were around, but they were far too busy slinging themselves all over that perfectly chiseled bod–no.
Don't finish that thought.
Lots of guys go to the gym, __. Jungkook is nothing special. These women are obviously brainwashed; unlike them, you don't have time for his little boy games. It's time to get out of here.
"Okay, well, I'm heading out. Nice seeing everyone," you say, rising from your seat.
Jimin whips his head around. "What, already? We haven't gotten to the good part yet."
“There’s a good part?" You scoff. “Or, you mean Jungkook making girl number two squirt all over the bed? Heard it before, don't need to hear it again."
"It was girl number one," Jungkook butts in, eager to correct.
Whatever. You swing the apartment door open, phone and keys in hand. "See most of you on work Monday." You allow the door to slam behind you.
"She okay?" Jungkook furrows his eyebrows, wheels turn in his head.
"Don't worry about her. Work's probably got her beat." Namjoon cracks open a can of beer unfazed.
Jungkook nods, chewing on the bottom of his lip. "Does she–"
"The answer's no. __ doesn't need a good fuck, so put those thoughts away."
Shit, Jungkook swears internally.
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Monday morning comes like hell on your doorstep. You're groggy when you wake up, barely getting to the shower. You considered skipping the ritual entirely but couldn't, not with how gross you felt. Project deadlines were right on your tail too, so you needed to either slap yourself awake or kiss your precious job promotion goodbye. You choose the later.
"Hey Minji, how are those files coming along?" You round the corner of the small office. It's 10 o'clock now, and everyone is typing, scanning, copying, and making phone calls until steam comes out of their ears.
"Almost finished." Your coworker, only a few years younger, responds. "Just have to tie up some loose ends, and then I'll hand them to you for review."
"Great. Thanks for–" You pause when you catch a slight grin spreading across Minji's face. Despite all the chaos today, Minji's definitely been the most cheerful. "You seem really happy today. Something good happened recently?"
Minji suppresses the grin and squeezes her palms in her lap. “Nothing in particular. Just glad to be a part of the team."
"Yeah, right!" Hoseok sends a knowing smirk, nearing the two of you. "Someone had a busy night last night, huh? It's okay. __ is cool. You can tell her anything." Once close enough, your coworker pulls you into a casual side hug.
You grimace. It feels weird while at the office.
"Do you mind?" You shrug him off. "It's work hours."
"Well, actually," Minji starts, cheeks rising. "It's nothing like that. I'm going on a date tonight. I'm just a little excited."
Hoseok's mouth forms an 'o', eyes widening. "Really? Who is it?"
"Uh, his name's Jeon–"
"Jungkook?” Jimin’s head pokes up from across the cubicle. Eavesdropping as usual.
"No…," Minji replies. "Who's Jungkook?"
"He's just a close friend of ours." Hoseok gestures between the three of you. “He’s Jeon Jungkook.”
"He's only you guy's friend," you say bitterly. Considering that player as a friend is pushing it for you. Really pushing it.
"C'mon, what's with you and Jungkook?" Jimin says, shooting you a borderline glare. "You've had bad blood with the guy since you met him.”
"Oh, don't start with me Park,” you fold your arms. "You know exactly why I feel the way I do."
You think he'll have a comeback, but he doesn't. Jimin simply sighs and returns to his work. Figures he'd be the one to jump to Jungkook's defense. The man practically idolizes him. That, and he's been best friends with him for the past eight years. Loyalty sure has its perks.
"So! If it's not Jungkook, who's the guy?" Hoseok asks, hoping to switch the topic around.
Minji jolts up in her seat. “Wonwoo," she says. “His name’s Wonwoo. We ran into each other at a friend's birthday party last night."
"Well, good luck with him tonight," you reply, returning to your office. "I'm sure it'll go well." Enough small talk. You have a whole seven hours plus of work left.
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6:45 p.m.
The clock on your screen blinks at you. Everyone's gone home by now, and so should you. But you're still here, fingers frantically typing on the keyboard.
“__, go home already." Your finance officer, Min Yoongi, stands in the doorway, resting an arm against the frame. He's got his soft, leather briefcase in the other hand; yes, the one you got him for his birthday a couple months ago.
Yoongi was the only person in your department who often stayed as late as you. He looked like he was on his way out, though. Must have gotten what he wanted done. "I'll get there eventually," you say. "Just finishing some reports for our meeting tomorrow."
"What reports? They're all done."
"Well…my reports."
"You mean, the ones that we don't actually need?" He quirks a brow.
"They're extra just in case. There might be something off, and this might help." Yeah maybe you were making shit up to keep yourself busy, so sue you. What else were you going to preoccupy your time with? You already polished off the last pint of cookies and cream ice cream.
"You're cute." Pushing off the doorframe, Yoongi nears your desk. "You know boss doesn't look at them."
"You never kno–"
"Hey." The authority in your co-worker's voice makes you straighten your posture. "Let's cut the bullshit." In a moment of urgency, he leans his body between you and your computer.
"Excuse you?" You shove his shoulder with both hands, but he stands firm until your computer goes pitch black.
"Here's what we're gonna do." You're gently pulled up and out of your seat by the wrist. "I'm gonna get a drink, and you're coming with me."
The man gathers your coat and bag, slinging them over a shoulder. You feel your legs being lifted off the ground soon after. "I can walk, you know." You reflexively kick your feet in protest. It's been a while since he's picked you up like this.
Yoongi switches off the light and makes his way to the elevator at the end of hall. "Not right now, you can't." He pushes the button, calling it up.
"Ah look at you," you purr, locking your arms around his neck. "Someone's been watching k-dramas after hours. Trying to confess or something?"
He enters the elevator for both of you, amused by your playful remark. "I consider you my friend, __. But if I were trying to confess, I'd just come out with it. Subliminal messaging isn't really my thing.”
Understanding his notion, you close your mouth. What were you supposed to say to that?
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You aimlessly watch as the woman pours freshly shaken alcohol into a short, round glass. She finishes the concoction by sticking an orange wedge along the rim. A cocktail, a classic but timeless favorite. Yoongi takes a sip of his whiskey and tilts his head towards you. "Whenever you're ready to spill your guts, let me know." 
"Hmm? I don't have anything going on." You down a shot yourself. "Nothing to spill here." 
He gives his glass a gentle swirl, liquid splashes against the sides. 
"Why are you looking at me like that? Nothing's wrong," you say. 
He sets his glass on the bartop, straight-faced. 
"Honestly, I don't know what you're getting at. We just came for a drink." 
"It's him, isn't it? Bunny boy with the six pack."
Your nose scrunches knowing exactly who he's referring to. With little thought you give a short 'no'. 
Yoongi stares at you nonchalantly. "Nice try, but I'm not an idiot, __. I don't know the guy that well, but I know enough that he's been on your mind a lot. You've been real prickly towards him too. Something tells me he's the reason you've been burying yourself in work lately.” 
"Don't be ridiculous. I'm just committed to my work. You know me, Ms. married to her job and all." You feign a chuckle. "I assure you, Ju–he's the furthest thing from my mind." 
“Mhm...right." He hums unconvinced. "Tell me ms. married to her job, why won't you say his name?"
"Because-" You cut shortly. "I'd rather not think of him right now. Can't we talk about something else or drink in peace?" 
He reaches for another taste of his burning liquor. "Alright."
Minutes pass before either of you speaks. You and Yoongi do this often, and you cherish it quite a bit. Sitting in silence after a long day at work soothes both your minds. But the man was right. Your mind isn't settled at all. No. It's buzzing with constant deadlines, family expectations, social commitments–  
"Okay it's him!" you blurt out, earning the attention of a few passing diners and even the bartender herself. Shoulders slouch as you grip the glass in front of you. Your eyes shift to your right, side-eyeing Yoongi, silently staring back at you.
"Jungkook...he’s just frustrating,” you finally say. “Fucking this girl, fucking that girl. Do you think I wanna know how many places he's stuck it in? No, I don't. But does that stop him?“
 You down your second shot. 
"He's been going on about the same lay for three years now. Three years, Yoongi. Honestly, how long's he going to keep it up? ‘They were begging to go again’, like who fucking cares?!” Blood boils through your veins.
A third shot. 
"I mean, how good can he be? If you asked me, he's average! Average Jeon Jungkook with probably an even more average dick!” 
“Damn, you’re pretty feisty angel.” A man slides on the stool to your left. “Calling me average and everything. Kinda hurts my feelings y’know?” 
You nearly choke picking up the man’s voice and scent– fuckin' Jungkook.
You swivel to face him. “Drop the pet names Jeon. I'm not your angel, and I seriously doubt I’m wounding any so called ‘feelings’,” you spit. “Why don’t you take your ego somewhere else…” You nod at the group of women gawking in the corner. Jungkook follows your gaze before meeting your eyes again.
"Not interested," he shrugs his shoulders.
“Oh wow, really?” Maybe sarcasm wasn’t the best way to go but since when did Jungkook start passing up overly eager women…shocker.
"Don't be insulting, __. I probably sleep around a lot more in your head than in real life."
"Please, who are you fooling," you reach for your fourth shot. Jungkook steals it out of your hand, however, shaking his head. 
"No, no, no." He sets the glass on his other side, furthest from your grasp. "Someone might be getting a little ahead of herself." 
Teeth clench. Is he patronising you?
"Do you mind?" The words spit out of your mouth. "I'm trying to sit and have a nice drink with my friend."
"And what friend would that be?" Jungkook leans forward in his seat, sparing a glance past your figure. 
"Yoongi."
"Oh, him…hate to break it to you but he left with some woman earlier.” 
You turn around immediately. He's gotta be messing around but damn– Yoongi really left you. That little snake. He'll be hearing from you tomorrow.
Rising from the barstool, you snatch your belongings and make your way to the exit.
.
"Where are you going, __?” Heavy feet patter after you, following you to the parking lot. "Just 'cause Yoongi's gone doesn't mean you have to leave." 
"I'm going home, Jungkook. 6am comes awfully quick." You want him to take the hint that you don't wanna stay but no such luck. You're instead blocked in your path, Jungkook facing you square on. He's a little close, but it doesn't matter. You'll just push around him.
"Alright, I'm sorry!" He wets his bottom lip. "If I've been too explicit about my private life, I'm sorry.” You watch as he rubs the side of his neck. “I tend-I tend to get carried away, especially around the guys. But after hearing what you said back there, I realize I should chill a little."
"Congratulations, you've figured it out.” You stare blankly at the man. “Can I leave now?" Brushing past him, you open your car door and jump inside. Dumb apology.
Fingers reach to shut the door, but Jungkook grips the rim, propping it open. "That can't be all." He leans down, shaking his head. "You clearly have some kind of vendetta against me and I'd like you to tell me why…please." 
You blink up, patience running thin. You’re wondering what you should say to get him off your tail, but the longer you linger the more it’ll look like you’re staring. And heaven knows Jungkook gets enough eyes on him as is, especially with his biceps bulging from his shirt.
Not that you’re paying attention or anything but take tonight for instance with those women ogling him in the bar. Like, did he have to wear a white tank top tonight? Show off.
“You’re so arrogant,” you say, clenching your fists. "You act like you're the best thing this world's ever gotten."
It’s obvious that your words strike a cord inside Jungkook. His face, riddled with concern and protest. 'Him, arrogant? What on earth is this woman talking about?' his eyes say.
"That's not true. When have I ever acted like that?"
Baffled. That’s what you are. It takes every ounce of gull left in your body to step out and meet the man at eye level.
"You're kidding. What do you call the constant retelling of your college fling then? Because you sure love the pedestal it gives you! Must have heard it fifty fricken times by now."
"Okay, maybe a bit then, but like I said I just get carried away. Lost in the moment if you will. The guys wanna hear it anyway, and it's just one story, __. Hardly enough basis to say I love myself or some shit."
"But that's exactly it, Jeon. You think everyone will worship at your feet just because you have that one story, a bunny like smile, and the body of a–"
"Woah, wait a second. Did you say worship at my feet? I get you're pissed off at me but come on, that's a bit much."
"It's n---shut up Jungkook!" You snarl. How dare he interrupt you after demanding you to tell him what's wrong. "Don't you ever get tired of running your mouth all the time?!"
"Me running my mouth? You're the one yelling sweetheart." His icy tone sets you off.
"Listen asshole, just for once, can't you just listen! You're so average, fuck!"
"Alright babe, I hear you, damn!" His eyebrows knit together. "And stop saying that I'm average! I'm not, okay?"
"There you go again, acting all entitled with that over inflated ego. I said it before and I'll never stop saying it–you're an average fuck! I don't care how many people you get in your bed."
Jungkook paces backwards, fingers laced behind his head. He cranks his neck back and chuckles. "Oh sweetheart, that's where you're so, so wrong."
"No idea what you're talking about," you say, unmoved.
He steps forward, complete disregard for your personal space. His breath heats your skin. "You absolutely care who I'm with...who I'm talking to...and especially who I'm fucking." He places a hand on the roof of your car. "You care so much that it's eating at you, bit by bit."
You do all you can to ignore the way the back of your neck fires up and how your heart picks up as he speaks but–dammit, this isn't the time! He's messing with your sanity. Or maybe, it's the shots kicking in. Both likely. Either way, you’ll be damned if you let him catch on.
"Fuck off Jungkook!" You push against his muscular chest. The force should have sent him stumbling back, but it only makes him slightly jolt. Courtesy of his rock-solid form.
"Why? 'Cause I'm right?" He traces down your figure. “ 'Cause you're scared of what will happen once we get close?”
Palms sweating, you struggle to form a proper response.
Option A: No, you're not scared in which Jungkook will likely challenge you.
Option B: Yes you're scared in which you let Jungkook be right and your efforts will be in vain.
Or Option C, what you've been doing all along: Fuck off!
Lust clouds over Jungkook's eyes as you remain motionless.
"How 'bout you prove it to me." His voice cuts through your contemplation. "That I'm wrong, that you don't want this, and I'll do the same for you."
You know exactly what he's insinuating– a one night stand. You swore you'd never give in to his antics. Then again, you never thought things would escalate this far either.
But if you agree to sleep with him now, you'll look like a hypocrite. And what of the countless speeches you made about not wanting to be another one of his swooning, giddy women? Still… it's not like you want to sleep with him. And if you do sleep with him, and he's average after all, you'll finally have something to testify to.
That'll knock him down a few pegs. 
"So…" You hear Jungkook drawl. "Is that smug expression you got on a yes?" 
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"Hurry up and unlock the door,” you snap, manners going awry. “I wanna get this done as soon as possible.”
"Relax will you.” Jungkook fiddles with his keys, nearly dropping them with every shuffle. “So bratty when you’re down to get some.” He ushers you forward once managing to crank the door open.
You ignore his snide remark, taking in the spacious room. “Don't tell me that's your bed,” you say. There, in the middle of the living room was a mattress. It was on the smaller side but not in bad shape. If that’s where Jungkook intends to give it to you though, you’ll gladly walk out.
“Seriously?” You're thrown a slightly pissed expression. “It’s for emergencies, okay? My room's down here." He breezes down the hall adjacent to the living room. You follow.
“Better?” A lamp switches on from the corner of the bedroom. The room’s a little bare but you can’t complain, at least it was clean.
"Yeah, its fine." You flicker your eyes at Jungkook, arms length away. Chest tightens, legs begin to shake.
This isn't a dream. You're fully conscious and you're about to jump in bed with Jeon Jungkook.
Inadvertently, you pause down at his lips–they look soft.
Oh fuck it...you can’t stomach anymore delays.
Feeling the adrenaline, you shake your coat off and toss it on the chair to the side. You march up to Jungkook next, grip the fabric of his shirt, and smash your lips against his.
It's unusual at first, sloppy even. You're moving your lips the best you can but it's a struggle getting into a rhythm. Likely because you've never kissed each other before, let alone made out.
The temptation to snort at how ridiculous the whole thing must look jabs at you. But it's when you feel Jungkook smiling through each kiss that it hits you like a ton of bricks–your lips have been the only ones moving.
"So that's how you kiss huh?" Breaking apart, he stares down at you, tongue in cheek. He's teasing you.
Rather than give an answer you smirk and twist the fabric of his shirt. You press your lips to his again but this time it's with more confidence and determination. A heavy grunt falls from his mouth and rough hands grip your hips as teeth clash against teeth.
"Fuck, slow down baby," Jungkook pants between kisses.
You ignore his plead and card through his hair with both hands, yanking on his soft, black strands. "I'm not your baby, Jungkook. Remember that."
Your back slams against the door instantly, knob rattling at the sudden pressure. With one hand, he anchors your wrists above your head while the tatted one wraps tightly around your waist. Saying this isn't turning you on would be a lie, a big fat lie.
"What do you want me to call you then?" Your thighs squeeze together when you feel his bulge brush against your center. His pecs graze atop your breasts too, causing a shiver down your spine. "Can't call you baby, can't call you angel."
You bite the inside of your cheek and gaze at Jungkook through your lashes. A devilish smirk spreads across his face at your chosen silence.
"Guess I'll have to figure it out along the way."
He inches forward, capturing your lips. His tongue licks the seam before pushing in the crevasse. Though you fight, you can't stop from moaning into his mouth.
You find your thoughts drifting to all the other places you'll feel his tongue tonight. Maybe on your neck, or your breasts, inside your thighs–fuck. You're about to soak your panties to bunny boy.
One by one, you feel the buttons of your silk blouse being pulled apart. The delicate material pools at to your feet in seconds, leaving you in your lacy white bra.
"Pretty," Jungkook plays with a strap before bringing his hands down to cup the swell of your breasts. "Not what I expected though...thought red was more your color." He flashes a cocky smirk.
"Very funny, Jung–"
You gasp when his thumbs start swirling tiny circles around your clothed nipples. "How hard are they?" He says.
"Take it off and find out."
"Fuck.” He squeezes your breasts. "You sure?"
Once giving a nod, you're pulled to the bed. Jungkook guides you on your back before settling himself around your waist in a straddled position. When he leans forward to reach behind your back, you feel his length poke you.
"Mm," you muffle a small moan.
He raises a brow. "What's gonna happen when I'm inside you huh?" The straps of your bra sweep off your shoulders. Cool air hits your breasts, nipples pebbling instantly.
"I can take it," you say.
Jungkook's eyes dilate at your bare breasted state. "Sure you can babe." The tips of his fingers graze along your sides. "Cause I'm just an average fuck yeah?"
His palms cup the underside of your boobs, squeezing lightly. He then lowers his lips to the ridge of your ear.
"Gonna make you come by your tits pretty girl." Your back arches as he digs his fingers into the soft flesh.
"Jungkook-"
"Fuck," he hisses. "Rolls off your tongue just right." He trails from your neck down to your naval, leaving open mouth kisses along the way.
Your core twists at the warm sensation. You wanna tell him not to leave marks but something inside you secretly hopes he does.
Jungkook traces back up your torso, giving your buds a few flicks with his thumbs before taking one between his lips. He sucks firmly, switching between breasts. Occasionally you let out a yelp when his teeth tug at them ever so slightly.
You desperately want to rub your thighs together due to the wetness pooling between them but the weight of Jungkook straddling you doesn't allow for much movement.
“Be a good girl and stay still," he says, cocky grin plastered on his face.
You're not a good girl, you pant back though your nearly frozen body would say otherwise.
A few more flicks of his tongue and you know he's made you come from your tits as promised.
Jungkook leans back on the his knees. "I really wanna fuck them now." He tugs on a nipple playfully but you slap his hand away.
"Don't even think about it," you say. "They're sore enough".
"You liked it though."
"Well no shit, I came didn't I? Can't believe it," you mumble under your breath. "Anyway, it's your turn now. Take your shirt off," you nearly demand."
"Even after coming, you're still a fiesty little kitten." He brings his arms around his waist. Your core tightens as you watch the white tank top lift up his muscular upper body and over his head.
"Satisfied?" He studies your expressions.
Instinctively, you trace down his sweaty build; starting with the collarbone. You work your way over to his shoulders after until his pecs draw your attention. And then his diaphragm, leading to the ‘v’ outlining his pelvis.
"Take them off too."
Jungkook gives you a pleased look. "Wanna see how average my cock is?"
You move to an upright position, face close to his. "More like wanna see what it can do." You snap the band of his sweats. "Hmm, what'd you think about that playboy?"
Jungkook's cock twitches. He needs to be inside you before he blows a load in his pants here and now. He gets up from the bed, hooks his thumbs in his sweats and pulls them down along with his briefs.
Alarms go off in your head as his half-harden cock is yanked out of it's confinement. It slaps against his abdomen, tip glowing with precum.
Swallowing, you fiddle with your own pants. It's huge and it's going inside you.
"What if I told you I wanna taste you first?"
You pause your movements and peer up at the man. "You mean...down there?"
You wanna slap yourself from how naive you sound but the thought of Jungkook's head between your legs was an affair you'd never predict to happen.
"Yeah pretty girl," Jungkook quips. "There."
"Uhm," you breath, stomach doing somersaults. "Okay."
He settles between your legs this time, panties kicked off in some odd corner of the room. He gives your inner thigh a kiss before running a finger up your slit.
A lusty moan leaves your lips.
He pushes in a moment later, making you gasp for air. Another finger pushes along side it and after a few pumps he's perfectly stimulating your g-spot.
"Jung-Jungkook fuck!" You grip the sheets from under you.
He brings his thumb over your clit, toying with the bundle of nerves. "Am I doing it right __?" He's teasing again.
You nod vigorously. "Don't stop...please. Don't you dare stop."
Jungkook hums in approval, low and breathy, but retracts his fingers from your soaking cunt. They're quickly replaced with his tongue however, licking a broad stripe up your folds. The action is repeated over and over until your once again digging your nails into his scalp.
"M' gonna come," you say with a shaky voice.
As if an invitation, he dips in your heat. A string of profanities spill out.
Shit shit shit, you chant as you release on his tongue.
Jungkook lifts his head up from between your legs and wipes his mouth off. "You're fucking sexy." He presses a deep kiss on your lips, long and messy. "And you taste sweet too."
"Fuck me," you nearly beg. "And call me a slut while your at it."
"You su–"
"You don't have to use a condom either. I'm on the pill."
"Real–"
"Yes Jungkook."
He shifts back from your body, chest inflating and deflating. "On your hands and knees then."
As soon as the words leave his mouth you flip over, your full backside in his view. Did you feel exposed? Hell yeah. But that's part of the fun.
You turn your head over a shoulder to see Jungkook inching behind you. From this angle you feel so small. You bite your lip, anticipation driving you wild.
"Don't forget what I asked for earlier playboy."
Hovering over your back, his breath tickling your skin. "And what makes you think I'll listen to you pretty girl?" His length brushes between your asscheeks.
You whine.
"Jungkook–"
All at once he aligns himself with your hole and thrusts himself in. The fullness of the stretch has your eyes roll to the back of your head.
"Fuck, you're so big," you moan.
"Yeah? You like this," he grunts, starting off a steady pace. "I knew you would." He nips your ear. "Cute how dumb little sluts like you think they know what they want, but really, they don't have a clue."
Your breathe hitches, squeezing around his length. "What about---fuck---assholes like you who decide what others want before asking?"
The bed jolts forward. You cling to all you can to steady yourself.
"It's not really deciding for others if they already want it, is it?" He snaps his hips. "I'm merely helping them, like an asset."
"Shu---god fuck!"
"Deny it all you want but we both know how hard this little pussy's clenching around my big, fat cock. Been wanting this for a while hasn't it?" Beads of sweat drip from Jungkook's brow. His wavy, black locks dangle in front of his eyes.
Helplessly, you start rocking yourself on him, meeting his thrusts in perfect sync.
"Holy shit–" Jungkook groans. "You get me so fucking turned around. Can't even be in a room with me for five minutes before you're clawing for a way out but here you are, desperate to take my cock."
"What can I say," you barely gasp, beyond wound up. "Can't stand arrogant jerks like you."
He snorts. "But you'll sure fuck 'em won't you? Slut."
Walls tightening, knees shaking, it takes only one last hard thrust and you're spasming around him.
Jungkook coaxes you through your high with broken grunts. "Fuck, you feel so tight and warm around me. Gonna come pretty girl? Gonna come all over my cock aren't you?"
"Jung---Jungkook!"
"It's okay sweetheart, you can do it. Fucking cream it."
And you do.
With his cock coated with your cum, Jungkook fucks through his own high. "Hang in there __, I'm almost there," he says, thrusts sloppy.
Once he releases into you his body grows limp on yours. A small yelp tells him to slide out and off you.
As you lie next to each other, panting heavily, you're the first to break the silence.
"I think I've proven my point. You gonna shut up about your story now?"
"I don't know which point that would be but sure," Jungkook turns his head to the side with a lazy smirk. "I'll shut up about the story. I have a new one on my mind anyway."
God what have you done. Uncaged the beast, that's what.
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A/N: thanks for stopping by, happy to hear your thoughts ☺💗
Masterlist
no reposting, copying, or translating my work
© kookslastbutton
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joonberriess · 2 years
Text
˚₊‧꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
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౨ৎ ⋆。˚ namjoon
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ sugar
boyfriend au. | 10.8k words | pregnancy, fluff, porn with plot
you have a long history with your gentle giant, there's a lot more to come in the future. alternatively you're the light of namjoon's life.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ bad guy
dilf au. | 2.7k words | revenge sex, daddy kink, age-gap
getting back at your cheating (ex) boyfriend by fucking his dad, Namjoon <3
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ juicy
boyfriend au. | 1.5k words | manhandling, size difference, cunnilingus
having a size difference between you and your boyfriend, you can't help but love how big he's gotten..
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ freak
boyfriend au. | 1.8k words | degradation, creampies, unprotected sex
the boys thinking you're the sweetest thing on this earth and can do no harm. namjoon has a few words to say about that.
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ macro
college au. | 1.1k words | big dick!joon, tummy bulge, creampies
namjoon's known around campus for being "big", you wonder if you can take him.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ homie hopper (ft. jungkook & hoseok)
college au. | 6.3k words | homie hopping, hook-ups, cucking
the rumors weren’t true… or were they?
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ me and your mama
boyfriend au. | 3.6k words | soft smut, drunk sex, pregnancy
you like to remember both what life before the little one was and after with your loving boyfriend namjoon.
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ seokjin
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ yoongi
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ angel
boyfriend au. | 7k words | fluff, slice of life, smutty
he's yours and you are his. you didn't need a magazine to tell you that, because the media knew nothing about what went on behind the scenes.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ what’s poppin
boyfriend au. | 1.7k words | chain fetish, sugar daddy!yoongi, raw sex
yoongi being the type to buy you a chain cause if he's pimped out, his girl gotta be too.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ devil
idol au. | 1.5k words | fingering, cunnilingus, degradation
being a staff member who is corrupted by yoongi, who takes a dark interest in you.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ shinunoga e-wa
husband au. | 1.9k words | soft smut, romance, cunnilingus
four times you said I love you, + the one time yoongi says it first. alternatively: five special moments with your beloved husband.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ “baby”
idol au. | 1.3k words | car sex, corruption kink, creampie
having a “innocent” reputation, but yoongi ruins it by fucking you in the backseat of his car.
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ hoseok
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ all mine
fwb au. | 6.9k words | producer!hoseok, casual sex, idol!reader
you never expected in a million years to work with the one and only jung hoseok. you also didn't expect to indulge in a series of hook-ups with the rapper, but like a good girl you obey your senior.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ nda
idol au. | 1.2k words | blowjobs, fan!reader, throat/face-fucking
being one of the "lucky" fans at lollapalooza, getting a one on one experience with hoseok.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ homie hopper (ft. jungkook & namjoon)
college au. | 6.3k words | homie hopping, hook-ups, cucking
the rumors weren’t true… or were they?
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ jimin
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ all i need
college au. | 1.7k words | bf!jimin, porn with no plot, lazy sex
it's a lazy afternoon and you're watching the sun set with your boyfriend who's between your legs..
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ want
boyfriend au. | 1.1k words | domesticity, porn with no plot, bf!jimin
forgetting all about the movie because jimin has other plans.
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ taehyung
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ groupie love
idol au. | 4.8k words | hook-ups, degradation, one night stand
he was all yours for just one night, and you want to make the best of it before you go back to being just his fan.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ sex talk (ft. jungkook)
fwb au. | 6.1k words | threesomes, hook-ups, fuckboy(s) taehyung & jungkook
you're seeing two hotties on the down low, getting your back blown out every other night by either one. that is until you find out they're roommates..
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ maneater
sugar daddy au. | 2.9k words | spanking, age-gap, blowjob
pissing off taehyung who is your much older, sexy, sugar daddy.
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ eat my love
boyfriend au. | 2k words | fluffy smut, spooning fuck, fingering
"fill me, fill you, I got some love, feel me, feel you, I got some love,"
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ captain hook
fwb au. | 1.8k words | hook-ups, multiple orgasms, protected sex
"i like a dick with a little bit of curve, hit this pussy with an uppercut, call him Captain Hook,"
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ ecoute cherie
fiancé au. | 1.3k words | domesticity, pregnant sex, body worship
traveling to Paris with Taehyung, just enjoying your time with your fiancé and unborn child in your belly.
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ throat goat
fwb au. | 1.1k words | blow jobs, porn with no plot, car hook ups
sucking the soul out of taehyung through his cock.
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ jungkook
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ big ole freak
fwb au. | 2k words | toxic!jungkook, car sex, degradation
you're both exclusive only to each other. jungkook fucks the way he acts-crazy, hard. too bad you're only here for the ride.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ sex talk (ft. taehyung)
fwb au. | 6.1k words | threesomes, hook-ups, fuckboy(s) taehyung & jungkook
you're seeing two hotties on the down low, getting your back blown out every other night by either one. that is until you find out they're roommates..
⇢ ☾ ˚₊ todas mueren por mi
boxer au. | 3.5k words | possessive jungkook, toxic relationship, angry sex
jungkook as a boxer and your boyfriend. he's your ride or die and you're his too. a modern day Bonnie and Clyde.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ 90s american superstar
highschool lovers au. | 4.7k words | fluffy, car sex, unprotected sex
a small fairytale that revolves around you and your boyfriend of many years, a journey of your ups and downs as you both enter the future together <3.
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ daddy issues
dilf au. | 2.4k words | older!jk, unplanned pregnancy, daddy kink
“take you like a drug, i taste you on my tongue,”
FLAWLESS SERIES
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ flawless
dilf au. | 3.4k words | daddy kink, unprotected sex, cunnilungus
“you’re a doll,”
02.
03.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ seven
baby daddy au. | 5.5k words | sleazy!jk, porn with plot, heavy dirty talk
"you know night after night, i'll be fuckin' you right," or: "girl hold on my baby daddy calling again."
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ pussy fairy
baby daddy au. | 2.6k words | breeding kink, fingering, shower sex
“that dick make my soul smile,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ slut me out
boyfriend au. | 1.9k words | porn no plot, cum eating, face riding
“put your ass in my face ‘til i get pink eye, fuck you anywhere, i’m that type guy,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ rodeo
dilf au. | 1.9k words | riding, daddy kink, subby!oc n dom!jk
“he love how i ride it, hop on that dick i make him get excited,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ malibu
baby daddy au. | 3.3k words | birthday sex, high sex, creampies
“she hotter than july in california, tan skin, eyes on it, stretched legs like the roads in malibu,”
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ do i wanna know
yandere au. | 19.8k words | stalking, dead dove, non-con/dub-con
“maybe i’m too busy being yours to fall for someone new. now i’ve thought it through, crawlin' back to you,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ agora hills
boyfriend au. | 1.9k words | porn w/o plot, messy sex, pussy whipped!jk
“love it when he hit and smack, too, baby lemme lick on your tattoos,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ 3D
pimp au. | 3.2k words | degradation, phone sex, masturbation
jungkook wants the real thing and not some picture or video. only thing is he’s on a business trip.
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ standing next to you
baby daddy au. | 6.9k words | drunk sex, angsty, fluffy
“they can’t deny our love, they can’t divide us, we’ll survive the test of time, i promise i’ll be right here, standing next to you,”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ need to know
pimp au. | 3.3k words | oc’s b day sex, pussy eating, public sex
“i just been fantasizin, and we got a lotta time, baby, come throw the pipe, gotta know what it's like,”
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ kerosene
cheating au. | 15k words | dead dove, obsession, blackmail
“i can live in your dreams, will you be my fantasy little baby?”
⇢ ❁ ˚₊ lovin’ you
flawless au. | 3.5k words | nasty sex, anniversary vibes, baby making!
“i was made, for lovin’ you.”
⇢ ✧ ˚₊ the boy is mine
bestie au. | 6.2k words | red flags, degradation, jk’s meannnn
“i can’t wait to try him,”
JOCK!JK SERIES
𓆩♡𓆪 the much needed thread (intro)
𓆩♡𓆪 “why don’t you say so?”
𓆩♡𓆪 “i ain’t motherfucking sharing,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “eat it like i need an apron on,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “can we take this off and get naked?”
𓆩♡𓆪 “booty so big, lord have mercy,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “he a eater, he ate it for lunch,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “i heard from a friend of a friend that that dick was a ten out of ten,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “wetter than umbrellas and stickier than apple pie,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “oh, i’m falling, forever you and i,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “damn papa, you a rare breed, no comparing,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “it’s the way that you can ride, think i met you in another life, so break me off another time,”
𓆩♡𓆪 “you don’t have to admit you wanna play, just let me rock you till the break of day,”
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