#fuckhead strikes again

[thywheelof-fate]

for the sake of your own sanity do not imagine enver gortash leaning up to give the dark urge a little kiss as they sit on his desk!! do not imagine his gold claws gently caressing their cheek as he brushes his lips against theirs!! do not imagine the shy shudder of relief that passes through them both, as they close their eyes to reality for just a second and bask in each other's warmth!!

it is infectious!! be warned!!

#aka i've been thinking about little tiny moments of something approaching normal in the midst of these two fuckhead's lives #look at them #being all cute and shit #durgetash brainrot strikes again #the dark urge #enver gortash #durgetash #the dark urge x enver gortash #baldur's gate 3 #bg3

[old-lady-habits]

an abled person just told me she wishes she had my disablility. because she thinks it's cute. because it changes the shape of my body and she wishes her bones would bend unnaturally like that. she just sits there with her perfect posture and her unaching back and legs and feet and she can just walk for over 10 fucking minutes and she's not in pain during every waking moment she's alive and she doesn't experience rapidly deteriorating muscles and she wants my deformity. i genuinely hate it here and want to kms.

#fuckhead cousin strikes again #for anyone curious i have a rather severe case of lumbar lordosis aka my lower spine turns outward like a C. #dot rambles #dot hates it here #dot is so fucking sad and tired and frustrated

[whitedemon-ladydeath]

its amazing that every single thing in the acotar series paints Rhys the one In the Right so often and the v few times he's ever acknowledged to be in thr wrong he gets forgiven in like. a chapter. and I'm not even talking about Rhys and Nesta bec I understand nuance and neither of them are 100% in the right for most situations

but Rhys with Az and warning him off Elain? Rhys is in the right. Rhys going behind Mors back and letting her abusers into her safe space and then lying to her face? it's a war 🥺 and he'd have killed Amarantha on the spot 🥺🥺🥺. he gets to cry about it and all is forgiven. Rhys threatens Amrens life if she didn't help with Azriel behind her ready to attack if need be. Rhys making a rape joke about Luciens abused mother? Feyre growls at Lucien when Lucien gets upset, Azriel and Cassian #stiffen waiting in case Rhys gives the order to strike Lucien dead. Rhys keeping a life threatening pregnancy from his wife and putting a gag order on EVERYONE else? Well Nesta was cruel and mean about it and just wanted to hurt her so she's the one in the wrong, actually

meanwhile Nesta has been punished again and again for the cabin years. She has been murdered for helping Feyre after agreeing to help Feyre bec of "everything Feyre sacrificed for them". Nesta is punished again and again by the ICs snarky comments, by Feyre not painting her. Nesta is punished for using the bar tab left open and a bribery to self medicate to smother her powers that scare her and to numb herself. Rhys somehow butts his way into the relationship between Feyre and Nesta, every time they find common ground and begin to mend their relationship. SOMEHOW every time Rhys gets involved they now have to start back at square one

yes. Nesta could have been a kinder sister. yes. Nesta could have done more in the cabin. yes. Nesta could have asked for/taken the help. yes. Nesta could not have abused the money that Rhys just So Selflessly bribed her with Gave Her

Have you Noticed that Nesta has zero beef with Azriel because he does not instigate a fight with her. He never insults her and they are perfectly civil.

Mor compared her to the people who shoved nails in her stomach and told her to "keep her forked tongue behind her teeth." Amren calls her a waste of life. Cassian watches Nesta waste away and then comments on her breasts in the same breath he notices how thin she is. Nesta almost dies to the Hike from Hell and being severely dehydrated and weak carrying the bags. he let's his friends talk shit about her and agree with them when they suggest she'd thrive in the Court of Nightmares. Rhys is a fuckhead who takes away her home, her autonomy, uses Elain against her, uses her trauma and grooming against her to get her to seduce Eris

I. fucking. get. it. She failed as a sister. I GET IT. she doesn't deserve to be punished for it over and over and over again. it is within Feyres right to cut her off and not interact with her. the IC, the *governing body* do not get to keep kicking and kicking her while she's already down

how much beating does this girl have to take to make it even. How much does she have to give to earn basic decency

she's just a girl. She's a traumatized, flawed, imperfect 23 year old girl getting beat down by 500 year olds

#a court of thorns and roses #acotar #sjm critical #nesta archeron #anti rhysand #anti cassian #anti inner circle #anti ic

[lilacliquors]

Hello :) I saw you are tking requests and I have something in mind for the prompt  [ TENSION ]  one muse is patching up the other’s injuries which leads to intense eye contact,  lingering touches and them finally crashing their lips against each other’s. maybe for Soldier boy But if you dont want to write it you dont need to so feel no pressure. have a nice day :)

patched

pairing: soldier boy x reader

prompt: [ TENSION ]  one muse is patching up the other’s injuries which leads to intense eye contact,  lingering touches and them finally crashing their lips against each other’s

word count: 767

contents: kissing, possible of blood, swearing, suggestive stuff, you know the drill

notes: this is just some classic stuff right here, we love kissing on this blog. and you have a lovely day yourself, nonnie!

it was a miracle he wasn't dead yet, with all the stupid shit he kept getting himself into. isn't wasn't every day payback had a serious threat to handle, they were mostly for show, but this time, he'd gone and gotten himself cut up. sure, the compound v in his system meant his injuries weren't as bad, but still, he was bleeding, and it was up to you to patch him up.

there he was, sitting on his couch in his cushy apartment, just waiting for you. he always refused to come down to medic, he thought he was above all of that. and you were the only one who didn't mind going to him. as long as you got the job done, and you got paid, that's what mattered.

he watched you as you set up your stuff, gauze pads and rubbing alcohol, pain killers and surgical thread for possible stitches, and his silence actually concerned you. normally, he was running his mouth, boasting or propositioning you, but you always ignored them.

"must've been pretty bad out there," you said finally as you gently dabbed at a slice in his arm with a gauze dampened with rubbing alcohol.

"wouldn't have been if those fuckheads kept their guard up," he muttered, eyes locked on the view from his window. you could see the horizon and beyond, and the sun was starting to set.

"bet it was the tnt twins," you said, only half joking.

"fucking a it was. fucking clowns can't get their shit together, and they need to touch their stupid little hands to even be worth something. if it were up to me, the pussies would be gone."

you simply nodded as you covered the gash with a non-sticking gauze that wouldn't rip a scab off. luckily, none of these cuts looked like they'd need stitches, which was a good sign.

"maybe you can say something to mister edgar. bad publicity is probably the last thing he wants right now," you said, reaching for another pad.

"not a bad idea. probably won't work, but then i can say i at least tried to rework this shitty fucking team."

again, you nodded. hero and team making policy wasn't your forte. but this was better than him ranting and raving like he normally would have done, along with the comments on your body. you looked him over once more and saw that the remaining cuts were littering his face, and inwardly, you groaned.

"uh, soldier boy?" you asked, and he turned his head slightly, an arched brow answering you. "you won't mind if i, uh..."

"darlin', you do whatever you need to do," he said, and there it was that signature smirk. at least he was sort of coming back to his old self.

with a soft sigh, you dampened another gauze pad and carefully eased onto the couch, settling your legs on either side of his so you were straddling him. it wasn't your ideal position, but it was the only way to reach everything.

you felt your face grow hot as you dabbed at the cuts. his eyes, those striking green eyes, were scanning your face, and as you went to disinfect the cut on his cheek, you found yourself gazing back into them. you'd never seen such beautiful eyes before, and it was like they were piercing your soul. gently, you brought a hand up to cup his face and turn his head, and to your surprise, he let you. and yet, his eyes were still locked on yours.

even after you finished and could move your hand, you didn't want to. even as he turned his head back to its original position, you didn't dare move. there was something unspoken, the tenderness with which you held him, it was foreign. and he couldn't help himself.

it was like you shared one single thought at that moment, and you were both quick to press your lips together in a searing kiss. his hands gripped your waist while yours cupped his face, and he couldn't let you go. one of his hands traveled up to lay flat on your back, pushing you against his chest, and you hummed, letting your thumbs caress his cheeks.

it was a kiss unlike any other. it didn't feel like he wanted anything more from you, just closeness. there was no rush for him to pull your top off you rip the pants form your legs, he just wanted to hold you. you, the only person who'd ever been gentle with him. and he didn't want to let you go.

#atomwritez #atomwritez 1k special #1k spicy special #soldier boy #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy smut #soldier boy imagine #soldier boy x you #soldier boy x y/n #soldier boy x female reader

[sapphire-weapon]

So. I gotta say some shit.

I think we all have a tendency to be more gracious to Ada's character than she rightfully deserves. I'm guilty of this, too. We all want to give her the benefit of the doubt and insist that her character serves a purpose and is worth talking about because she's A. such a huge part of Leon's character and B. the only non-white member of the cast, but like.

There's nothing there.

I noticed this when I rewatched Separate Ways recently (because fuck ever playing that shit again holy fuck Separate Ways sucks to play).

After RE2, Ada isn't a character anymore. She has absolutely no arc; her character never develops or goes anywhere. She's not tied to anyone or anything in the plot in a way that matters -- even her relationship with Wesker doesn't fucking matter, because there's no fallout or consequence as a result of anything she does to/with/for him, whether it's beneficial to him or against him. She has only one facet to her personality: snarky and mysterious. We never see her emote or speak in a context removed from either of those two qualifiers. Ever.

She has some softer moments here and there, but they last for like a single line of dialogue or two and then the scene just completely moves on without them -- so, those softer moments never actually matter anyway.

She doesn't enhance or enrich Leon's character in any way; the only thing her character serves to do is isolate him from the main cast, which gives his character nowhere else to go other than horrible, spiraling depression because every action he takes in his life turns out to be completely meaningless -- because it's not allowed to mean anything, because he's become so far divorced from the central plot of the series.

The only functional purpose that Ada Wong actually has is as a plot contrivance to explain how a bad guy did a thing. Other than that, she exists solely as a pair of legs and tits for Leon to chase after.

We all hold out hope that Remake is going to change this and turn her into a real person with autonomous motivations and goals, and there might be some merit to that, but like

She's not there yet. She's just not. There is no there there, when we talk about Ada's character.

And this tiptoeing around that we all do to try to make it seem like we're supportive of her character just

strikes me as silly a lot of the time, man.

I understand wanting to give credit where it's due, but it's not due for Ada's character. And I understand the desire to not be seen as misogynistically bashing her, but I feel like supporting her character as it currently exists is what's actually misogynistic. Because her portrayal in canon is misogynistic.

And I also understand the desire to not be seen as being a ship war fuckhead, but like. It's not about the ships, man. It's about Ada. Specifically Ada. She just sucks, dude.

And this is coming from the person who has probably written more meta about Ada Wong in an attempt to justify her character than basically anyone else in the fucking fandom.

idk I've just been thinking about this lately while perusing EagleOne fics. It feels like everyone in this ship feels obligated to address The Ada Problem before they can start to justify a relationship between Leon and Ashley, and it's like

No, you don't. Especially in Remake canon, you absolutely do not have to bring up Ada at all. Because Remake seems very self-aware of the fact that the problem with Leon's character has always been Ada, which is why they seem to be actively writing her out of his overall arc.

Like. Let's just call it for what it is. Ada is the worst part of Leon's character. The relationship is poorly written and poorly executed and doesn't make any fucking sense for who both characters are actually meant to be. They actively hold each other back -- not as people, but as characters who are meant to meaningfully contribute to the storyline.

And idk I'm just tired. I'm just tired of always having to do the hand-wringy "oh no no, Ada's really cool and great and I'm not trying to diss on her, and her relationship with Leon actually matters" shit, man.

Because she's not cool or great and her relationship with Leon doesn't actually matter -- and if it does matter at all, it's due to the negative impact that her presence brings -- not just to him, but to the entire fucking plot of the series.

She's the worst recurring element in the entire series, and there's not even a close second.

#resident evil #ada wong

[sagaduwyrm]

Here I am With All My Flaws (Seeking Form and Shelter)

Dick Grayson had half an hour left on his patrol before he could go home and go to sleep. Then Dante Nightingale and his siblings happened. And oh fuck, why is he so pretty. OR Dante Phantom has two deaged siblings to hide and Gotham is somehow the best option. The cute vigilante was a surprise though. The accidental murder is pretty par for the course.

Side Note: Does anyone know what the ship name for Dick/Dan is?

In his long years as a vigilante, Nightwing had learned one thing very well: Gotham did not know the meaning of the phrase “A quiet night.” In Gotham, a quiet easy night was the calm before the storm, the eerie stillness that preceded death and destruction.

Which was why he was pleasantly surprised to find his shift almost over and nothing worse than a few muggings and one stick-up to show for it.

Then again, this was the plan. Red Robin and Spoiler had the cult case, Robin was with Black Bat tracking down Dr. Freeze, Batman was out of town, and the Birds of Prey were working their way through a new crime family. Red Hood rarely discussed his plans with the other bats, but as far as Nightwing knew, Crime Alley was all normal operations at the moment, with only a minor intrusion by the Falcones for Hood’s men to deal with.

That left Nightwing with the simplest job of them all: petty crime. All he had to do was patrol the streets and make sure that the more minor criminals knew that even with all the wackos and bigshots running around, the bats still had more than enough hands to keep an eye on them too. A quiet, easy job, at least by bat standards. Just another half an hour, then Signal would take over for him and he could head back to the manor, get a quick shower in, snag some of Alfred’s cooking, and crash for the next eight hours.

A harsh crash echoed through the alleys beneath him, like flesh striking brick. Nightwing winced in sympathy and quickly tracked the sound to a nearby crevice.

A man was climbing his way back up to his feet, apparently the one to meet the wall with his backside. He looked skinny as a rake with ragged clothes and the symbol for one of the local gangs sewn onto his shoulder. He was laughing, short asthmatic huffs that were the hallmark of any Gothamite who’d had a too-close encounter with the Joker’s laughing gas and hadn't gotten proper treatment.

“A meta, huh? That won’t save you. We own these streets boy. We’ll own you too.”

Nightwing froze where he was crouching. He had already planned to wait until he understood what was going on, always a good practice when organized crime was involved, but with a meta in the mix, this could get bad. Even numbers on whether it’d be the meta or his opponents in trouble.

Dick turned sharp eyes on the other man in the alley. He was caught half in shadow, with broad shoulders and a sharp, strong jawline, messy hair tied back but swaying gently, flickering like fire. In any other circumstances, Nightwing might have tried to flirt with him. He’d always been a sucker for the sort that looked like they could break him in half.

"Stay. The Fuck. Away. From. Them," the taller man snarled.

Fuck, even his voice was sexy. It was deep and rich, with an eerie undertone like a roaring fire, marking another box in the meta-or-inhuman checklist.

The goon was still giggling. “Ooh, big scary man with a big scary voice. Not going to save you. Hand over the brats or watch them die, fuckhead. We’ll even—” he cut himself off with a sharp cackle. “We’ll even give you a cut of the profits, how about that?”

Every piece of electronics within ten yards shrieked and began throwing up sparks. Nightwing swore and jumped to dodge a falling air conditioning unit, thankful for the layers of magical and non-magical protection on his own electronic gear. He swiftly kicked the now-on-fire unit onto cement, pulling out the pellets of fire extinguisher foam from his utility belt.

When he looked back down into the alley, the meta had the fool by the throat, dangling him a foot above the ground where he thrashed frantically. The meta's eyes were glowing the color of congealed blood.

“You think you can sell my siblings? In this city? ” The man had a very sharp set of fangs, Dick noted, ones that didn’t seem to exist entirely in the physical plane. Mainly, there were too many of them and they were too long to fit in his mouth. Nightwing was sure they hadn’t been there twenty seconds ago. “Try it,” the meta snarled. “If the bats don’t get you, the Red Hood will. If he doesn’t get you, I will.”

The goon had frozen sometime during his speech but was now struggling fiercely, with an almost insane desperation in his eyes. He thrashed and yanked, while the man watched with disgusted derision, apparently unimpressed with the previously willful man’s terror. Nightwing snorted a little under his breath and went to make his way down and break things up before they could go too far. He needed to arrest the perp and interrogate him about his gang’s business. Just because this man could clearly protect himself and his family didn’t mean everyone in Gotham could.

The scrawny man got his foot up and kicked at the other’s torso. The man didn’t flinch, but his fingers did clench around the criminal’s neck in surprise. The meta had claws , Nightwing suddenly realized. Sharp ones.

They went straight through the goon's neck, severing arteries that started spraying blood like a fire hydrant. The idiot was dead before he hit the ground.

The two of them, the vigilante and the murderer, stared at the body in mute shock for a long moment.

Finally, Nightwing dug some words out of the hole in his chest. “Did you just kill him on accident ?” His words held more than a tinge of disbelief. Even in Gotham, or especially in Gotham, murder tended to hold a bit more intentionality behind it. 

The man looked up at him, no surprise visible at the vigilante’s presence, but plenty of other emotions crowding his face. Annoyance and exasperation, startlement, bad-tempered fury, and intense stress competed for room in his body language.

“If I meant to kill him,” he spoke slowly, in the same way that the build-up before a volcanic eruption was slow. “He’d be a bloody smear on the wall. I don’t do overkill. Why the fuck—”

he cut himself off with a growl, seeming to struggle for words. “That amount of pressure wouldn’t put a scratch on my siblings. I didn’t expect—” he gestured towards the body, flicking the blood off his claws with a sharp movement— “ that .”

Nightwing gave a hum, carefully cleaning up his body language so the other man wouldn’t be able to read the shock and wariness in it. If the meta’s siblings were similarly endowed and he wasn’t used to interacting with normal humans, that would make accidentally tearing a man’s throat out plausible. It didn’t make it okay though, and the way the man used the phrase ‘bloody smear on the wall’ had Nightwing's hackles up. His hand inched towards the button on his belt that would call for backup.

The meta’s head jerked to the side and his eyes, still steadily glowing red, widened, causing Nightwing to jump. A door set into the apartment building across the alley opened with a rusty creak where the man was looking. Two children levered their heads out the door, peering down the alley with sharp, clever eyes that looked just like the meta’s. They couldn’t have been older than five or six.

Their eyes widened with delight when they caught sight of what must have been their older brother. 

“Tay!” they shrieked. They hurtled down the alleyway, leaping at their brother from a distance that made Nightwings breath catch. The man spun in place to catch them, kicking the corpse behind a nearby pile of trash in the same movement.

“Tay! The food started boiling over and I know you said not to touch it but I did because it looked really bad and Danny said I should’ve just turned the stove off but I know you stir it whenever—”

The boy shoved his sister’s face to the side, cutting her off. “I told her she should have just turned it off but she tried to stir it and it splashed on her and she iced it! The whole thing! And I couldn’t get it to melt!”

The meta’s harsh expression melted into exasperated fondness, and he slipped his grasp down to the kids’ ankles, throwing them over his shoulder’s to their delighted shrieks. His claws didn’t pierce their skin.

It was a little easier to understand why he was so ready to murder with the kids right there. They were tiny .

Dick took a deep breath, fighting to get his body to relax into something less battle-ready. He felt his shoulders tense back up though as all three meta’s swung glowing gazes up to his perch.

Blood red, lazarus green, and cyan blue. All mildly alarming colors to see in glowing eyes. Dick was unsure whether it helped or not that, now that he could see the man’s full face, his sharp glare was uncomfortably attractive.

“Tay,” the girl leaned in to whisper in her brother’s ear. Of course, it was a five-year-old’s idea of a whisper, so Nightwing could still hear it. “We aren’t supposed to let the bats know. They’ll make us leave .” She looked very solemnly at his brother after disclosing this information.

Nightwing cleared his throat, determinedly not thinking about the goon who just lost his throat or about the beautifully soft expression the meta graced his sister with. “You really should leave. Gotham isn’t a safe place for any kid, but especially not metas.”

“We aren’t—” the girl’s face scrunched up and her brother slapped her hand over his mouth, before burying his face in their eldest brother’s back.

The man looked back at Nightwing, a hint of a snarl on his face. “You think we’d be here if we had any other options? This city is the only one that will hide us.”

Nightwing’s gaze sharpened. “Hide you from what?”

The man scoffed. “None of your business, Knight of Gotham.”

Nightwing examined him carefully. He was inclined to believe that anyone who so clearly cared about his little sibling couldn’t be all bad. Not to mention, Gotham had all sorts of weird energy fields going on and a strong hostility toward outsiders. The city truly might have been their best chance at hiding from whoever it was whose memory had the younger siblings curling up into themselves and the elder brother broadening his stance as if in preparation for a fight.

Still, Nightwing didn’t like the idea of someone with the man’s power sticking around in Gotham with no one keeping an eye on him, both for his sake and others. Luckily, he had an idea.

“Look. There is a reason we keep metas out of this city. But,” he painted a winning smile on his face and raised a hand to forestall any protests. “We aren’t going to kick you out if Gotham is really your best option.” Well, he said we, but really he was making the decisions here. Batman would just have to deal.

The man’s eyes narrowed. “What are you suggesting?”

“Red Hood’s territory is barely five minutes from here.” Nightwing paused, thinking of his younger brother with pride. “And he would fistfight God to protect his people.”

The siblings winced and the younger boy, now on the ground, peaked around his brother to talk with Nightwing. “We don’t want to intru—” he paused, struggling to pronounce a word for a moment, “ intrude in his ter-ri-tor-y.” The boy beamed after getting the full, clearly practiced, phrase out.

Nightwing cocked his head. That wasn’t a no, just a concern. “It’ll be fine,” he said cheerfully. “Look, I’ll call him right now, and we can get you moved over to somewhere I won’t have to constantly check to see if you’ve been kidnapped from by tonight.” Tonight being in twelve hours or so, because somehow it was nearly dawn, and Dick really wanted to be in bed right now but he wasn’t just going to leave this obnoxiously gorgeous man and his siblings. Who knows what trouble they would find? It took a special kind of bad luck to accidentally kill a gang member .

He pulled his phone out of his belt and pulled up Jason’s contact. Hood would be happy to shelter the family, even if he would probably be a bit twitchy about having metas with unknown capabilities in Gotham. Still, better to have them where they could keep an eye on them and hopefully get the chance to earn their trust.

“Hey, Hood?”

“What do you want, Dickhead?” Jason grumbled back at him. He sounded grumpier than normal, and Dick made a mental note to try to figure out if he’d been injured recently.

“I have a family of metas here that need to stay in Gotham, but they’ve already gotten in fights with one gang. Mind if they move into your territory?” Dick purposely used the same word the boy had earlier so they knew he was checking on their concerns.

“How many?”

“Three!” Dick turned to the kids. “Can you tell Hood how old you are so he knows who to expect?” “I’m Danny and that’s Ellie. We’re five.” The child tilted his head as if in confusion. “I think.”

Dick blinked in mild alarm at that. Lots of kids didn’t know how old they were, but something about how Danny phrased that made his inner detective concerned. He looked at their older brother.

The man grunted. “Dante. I’m twenty-three. Probably.” Something amused sparked in Dante’s eyes at the bewildered look Nightwing gave him, and he drawled out, “Murphy’s Law.”

This did not assuage Dick’s concern or really explain anything.

Jason stayed silent for a moment, before sighing. “Fine. I’ve got an apartment they can stay at. I’ll text you the address and we can talk rent later.”

“Thanks, Hood!” Nightwing bounced cheerily on his toes, mindful of the kid’s wide eyes on him. He was probably not setting the best example standing on a rusty railing, but the theatrics tended to help keep civilians, especially kids, calm.

Hood spoke again, “You’re responsible for getting them moved in and checking on them until they get used to my men, Dick.”

“Sure.” Dick smiled at the thought. It would give him an excuse to do something he was going to do anyway. He didn’t plan to let go of the many concerning things the family had mentioned. It had absolutely nothing to do with his teeny tiny crush on the beautiful meta who moved like a predatory jungle cat and loved his siblings so much he practically glowed with it.

“Talk to you later Hood!”

“Yeah, yeah, fuck off asshole.” As he hung up Dick thought that that had gone better than many of his previous conversations with his little brother.

Crimson eyes were still straight on him, and something about the set of Dante’s shoulders screamed caution. “This is freely given?”

Dick blinked. “What?”

“Your aid,” Dante clarified. “It’s freely given. No strings attached?”

That was the sort of language magic-users tended to use. Dick considered his words carefully. “You are in Gotham. Everything in Gotham is mine and my family’s to protect. If the best way to protect you is for you to stay in Gotham,” an honestly insane idea, but they knew their situation best. “I will help you stay in Gotham safely. So yes. My aid is freely given.”

The meta(?) hummed. “Danny, Ellie, go grab our go bags.” The kids nodded and ran back into the building.

Dick’s heartstrings tugged at the idea that everything they needed could be grabbed so quickly, but his gaze was dragged back to the eldest meta.

Something was different about him. Something in the air, the weight and mass of it pressing on Nightwing's shoulders. Something in his shadow, too dark and too deep. Something in the glow of his eyes…

Nightwing had never seen that shade of red before, he realized suddenly. He was almost certain it wasn’t supposed to exist.

“If you cause my siblings any harm,” Dante looked him straight in the eyes and Dick felt oddly frozen despite all his experience that said he should be able to handle this. “I will peel the flesh from your bones and use your entrails to hang your body from the rafters of your family home.” Dick blinked, finally unfrozen, and smiled brilliantly, the way that made seasoned Gotham rogues take a step back. “Understood.” Dante looked at him with something like respect. “I’ll go make sure they haven’t caused any explosions. We’ll be ready in ten."

He swept out, and Dick let himself collapse against a wall.

He really needed to get himself under control. Being attracted to people who could (and would) kill you wasn’t a good thing for a vigilante, even if Batman made it seem normal.

#dpxdc #danny phantom #batman #dc #dc comics #fanfiction #my fic #dick grayson #nightwing #dan phantom #ellie phantom #crossover #meet cute #de aged #accidental murder #family #siblings #big brother dan phantom #eldritch #Dan Phantom redemption

[lunarrolls]

polymorph, chetney, and ashton. i know the prompt list was hurt/comfort but honestly go as silly as u want with this one

this is literally the best prompt ever i think. i had far too much fun with it. ashton and chetney are already two of my favs, especially when put together, and then you throw in the ULTIMATE SHENANIGANS KNOWN AS POLYMORPH? absolutely FLAWLESS. they’re so stupid. i love it. banana you’re the best

•

Polymorph is a fourth level transmutation spell on the bard, druid, sorcerer, and wizard spell lists.

This spell transforms a creature that you can see within range into a new form. An unwilling creature must make a Wisdom saving throw to avoid the effect. A shapechanger automatically succeeds on this saving throw.

The creature is limited in the actions it can perform by the nature of its new form, and it can’t speak, cast spells, or take any other action that requires hands or speech.

The target’s gear melds into the new form. The creature can’t activate, use, wield, or otherwise benefit from any of its equipment. This spell can’t affect a target that has 0 hit points.

•

Ashton stood with the handle of their hammer between the doorknob and the jamb, trying their damndest to keep their pursuers from breaking the thing down completely. Their muscles strained as they leaned all of their not insignificant rocky weight on the door.

“Any fucking day now, Chetney,” he gritted out, scowling in the gnome’s general direction.

“Shut up! This shit takes time,” the old man snapped back, flipping him off as he picked the lock on the desk. “No goddamn patience.”

“Oh, by all fucking means, take your time!” Ashton said, pointedly staring at him as one of the crew (probably the damn goliath, the way the door nearly buckled under the strike) slammed against the door and nearly sent him flying across the room. “I don’t know what I was thinking!”

“Finally getting some appreciation from you,” Chetney sniffed as the lock clicked open. “See what happens when you shut your mouth?”

“Just grab the fucking necklace so we can get the fuck out, Chet,” Ashton snapped without any real heat. They were actually sort of worried this crew was gonna start using weapons to break open the door, and they preferred their body un-skewered.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m working—oh,” Chetney said, going very still.

“What?” Ashton demanded, his gaze whipping over to where Chetney stood. “Hells, Chet, what could be so—“

His sentence was interrupted by a loud popping noise, followed by a strange green arcane blast. Ashton’s first thought was fuck, a trap that bastard forgot to disarm, as they ducked and covered their head, trying to avoid whatever magic was just released by Chetney’s incompetence. When they opened their eyes again a fraction of a second later, they were not greeted with the familiar sight of a crotchety old gnome. In the gnome’s place, a small, furry mammal wrapped in leathery wings and sporting massive brown ears sat, blinking confusedly. A fruit bat, Ashton thought.

The good news was that nobody could take the necklace from Chetney now. Ashton didn’t see it anywhere in his little hand-talon-wing appendages. So that was good.

The bad news was that, in his surprise, Ashton had stopped leaning against the door as much, and now those fuckheads were seriously about to slam him across the entire damn room if he didn’t move in the next two seconds.

Quickly, they stumbled to their feet, snatching their hammer from where it was wedged—protecting the room was a lost cause at this point, they’d already gotten what they came for, even if it turned the old man into a fucking fruit bat, apparently, what the fuck—and the small, furry form of what was probably Chetney Pock O’Pea from the carpeted office floor just as the goliath smashed the door in half with her polished battle axe.

“Greymoore!” she bellowed, leveling her axe with Ashton’s face. “Nowhere to run, fuckhead. It’s just us now.”

“You underestimate the shit I’m willing to do to not have to deal with your bad breath,” Ashton said, immediately feeling like a twelve year old for the stupid taunt. The feeling was pushed to the back of his mind as he assessed his options.

“I don’t think I’m underestimating shit,” the goliath snarled, her friends (the fucking sneaky little katari who ratted him out and the elf with the bow who’d tracked him, dammit) fanning out behind her, “considering the shit you pulled to avoid paying me back.”

“Listen, I forgot about that. Genuine mistake. I can get the gold to you soon, promise,” Ashton said. He did kind of mean it, too, but mostly he was just trying to figure out how the fuck he was supposed to get out of this second story room. The original plan was to have Imogen fly up and get them if anything went wrong, but she hadn’t arrived yet, probably because Ashton had held the door instead of signaling for her. He hadn’t accounted for several random people who he’d apparently cheated out of a small fortune in a gambling house a couple years ago showing their stupid faces again, sue him. Honestly, he hardly remembered even playing a game with them. He’d cheated a lot of people out of money in that gambling house.

Besides the point. The bat in his arms seemed displeased. Ashton was very displeased, also, so Chetney wasn’t fucking unique in that regard.

They clutched the small animal tighter, realizing the only possible escape.

There were rooftops close to the study they were standing in. Ashton was gonna have to jump out of a goddamn window again, because that had gone so well for him last fucking time. Couldn’t get enough of window jumping.

Chetney seemingly realized what he was about to do before he did it, squeaking loudly in surprise, or maybe warning, but Ashton never listened to Chetney even when he could speak and he certainly wasn’t about to start listening to him now that he could squeak.

He hastily stuffed the small bat into the pouch around his leg, slung his hammer over his shoulder, and sprinted for the window.

“Hey!” the goliath shouted behind him, taken aback by his decisiveness, but Ashton was already on the windowsill, catapulting themself out into the air.

For a horrifying moment, they were suspended there, mid-leap, left to briefly wonder if this was how they’d fallen off that stupid balcony. Then, gravity took hold, and they started on the gradual arc of descent.

Randomly, they found themself annoyed that Orym hadn’t been sent on this mission as Chetney’s bodyguard. He was certainly more likable and far less likely to have a group of people out for his blood for doing literally nothing (in the past two years) to piss them off, and he had those magic boots that let him leap jumps like this no problem. Ashton had fucking nothing.

They didn’t bother to pray, just brace themself as they fell and hope that either their feet hit a solid rooftop or that they didn’t hit anything too horrible on the way down.

They immediately proceeded to drop like a stone (ha ha, they sarcastically thought to themself) and slam their head on the edge of the rooftop they’d tried to jump to. Their hands scrambled against the shingles, trying to find purchase, but of course, they were too heavy to get any traction, so down they went, straight onto the pavement.

Ashton yelped as they landed hard on their tailbone, probably fracturing it, and smacked the back of their head on the wall of the alley. Bat-Chetney protested in his pocket, squeaking as if to say, the fuck was that, Greymoore?

“Shut up, Chetney, hells,” Ashton growled, shakily standing up. They had to get the fuck out of here before that stupid gang caught up with them.

“Come on,” Ashton hissed, sprinting deeper into the alley. “We gotta blend in. We’ll find the others in a bit.”

He blended into the crowd as best he could when looking like he did, keeping his hood up and his head down and sticking to alleys until he was sure they’d lost their tail. Sighing and wincing, he roughly grabbed Chetney from his pouch and held him up, studying his new form.

“Gods,” they said, poking Bat-Chetney’s snout, “you’ve never looked better.”

The bat squeaked. Ashton snorted. “Don’t suppose you even understand me right now? Fuck, I’m trying to remember how this shit works. Fearne would know.”

Speaking of Fearne, Ashton had no idea where she was. Looking up, they realized they also had no idea where they were. They’d lost the tail, but in the process, it seemed like they’d also lost their allies.

Well. They’d be getting a strongly-worded message from Imogen, then. Hopefully she didn’t try to message Chetney. That probably wouldn’t go well right now.

Ashton did spend a little too long giggling at the idea of Imogen sending out her usual psychic brainwaves or whatever and just getting a bunch of confused bat noises back. That was probably what happened whenever she tried to message Chetney anyway, though, they reasoned.

•

Imogen was about done with their missing party members. She loved them to death, but gods, they were stupid sometimes.

They should have sent Orym with Chetney. Lord knows what possessed everyone to agree that Chetney and Ashton were the right people to discreetly grab that necklace. They’d managed to fool everyone into believing they were competent thieves, and now she was having her second infuriating psychic conversation from halfway across a city with Ashton.

The good news was that they weren’t dead or captured, and they’d gotten the necklace, but true to Ashton fashion, they’d managed to piss someone off and also turn Chetney into a bat, somehow. That did sound pretty funny, though, she had to admit. She hoped Chetney was still a bat when the duo was found.

Her hopes were dashed somewhat when F.C.G.’s locate creature spell led them to their friends, both in their respective humanoid forms, hiding out in the back of an ally.

“What in the hell were you two thinking,” Imogen demanded, waving her hands with the words. “That was supposed to be a quick smash and grab!”

“Well, it was!” Ashton smirked. “We’re here, aren’t we? And we have the necklace. We smashed, we grabbed. Good times were had by all. Now we can go get drunk off our asses to celebrate!”

Imogen massaged her temples. They had no goddamn business being that smug, considering the amount of magic she and Letters had burned trying to find them, but if she told them that, both Ashton and Chetney would get even more unbearably smug.

These two would fucking kill her one day if she didn’t kill them first.

“Fine, whatever,” she said, crossing her arms and turning to peer out of the alley, making sure nobody was paying attention to them. “Let’s just get out of here.”

“Where’s the necklace?” Fearne piped up, putting on her best innocent smile. It worked on exactly none of them, but it was funny to see her try. “I can hold onto it. For safekeeping, of course.”

“Of course,” Ashton agreed, smiling in that enabling way they often did when Fearne stole shit and leaning to fish the pendant from Chetney’s grasp.

“Ash, wait—“ Orym started, but he didn’t finish the sentence.

A green flash of light and a loud popping noise later, a very confused adolescent deer was standing with the Hells in the alley.

Chetney laughed so hard that he bashed his head on the wall.

Imogen was actually going to murder both of them as soon as Ashton turned back. Even though part of her was very happy at seeing her earlier wish fulfilled.

#cr #cr3 #ashton greymoore #chetney pock o'pea #imogen temult #roll performance #charisma save #spelling disasters #i rolled three times for this prompt hehe #chetney rolled a seven on his polymorph save #ashton rolled a nineteen on a dex save to avoid the door slamming open #and then subsequently rolled a fucking seven athletics to jump to the next rooftop #i probably could have rolled stealth and another saving throw for ash’s polymorph #but i wanted the funniest possible option #i am a huge fan of polymorph shenanigans i’ll eat them up every time #i’d write this forever if i could

[cinamun]

I'm not really getting the 'Jayce about to cheat' vibe! Not to say it couldn't take a turn but right now it strikes me as a teacher genuinely trying to help his student. He's obviously still very much into Hope, as demonstrated in the events prior to him going to teach class. I do think Hope needs something besides just baby and husband duties though, even if it's different than before. I think she's too ambitious to be a housewife forever (not that there's anything wrong with being a housewife)

As for Mercy and Fuckhead, I almost threw my phone when he showed up again!!

Listen LMFAOO Fuckhead has that effect on us!! SMDH!

Okay so right, I mean from the looks of the booty-print on the bedroom window, something tells me Hope is still on the man's mind as is usually the case...

and I mean, don't get me wrong, spouses cheat no matter what the circumstances BUT we gotta think realistically (simulatedly?)! Its far more likely that, as much as Jay geeks out over Coltrane (they literally named their daughter after John Coltrane's wife) he's probably absolutely fascinated that this random and disrespectful student knows an important detail about his fave AND can play it.

I mean just look at his face!

And now he hears that she might be dropping out and wasting some serious talent?

#stay tuned #story stuff #let me go take these wings out

[woodsfae]

Howdy all! I've been having a rough last few days week month year life time lately, and yesterday when I burst into tears after Partner asked me if I had a certain tax form, I knew it was time to sit my ass in a hot springs and stare at trumpeter swans. So I did! And it was great. I'm so very lucky to live in a place where I have a dozen hot springs within two hours' drive, and exceedingly lucky that one of my favorites overlooks a pond full of beautiful waterfowl. So now I am refreshed, still cigarette-free, and ready to watch more Babylon 5!

Babylon 5 S01e13: By Any Means Necessary First Previous

Table of Contents

Very Ominous Title.

Remind me never to work in cargo receiving. That looks awful. They’re really busting their cojones trying to process everything down there.

Collision?? Eeeeeeeee yikes no this is bad looking.

Industrial accidents are generally very bad. I physically recoiled from the screen. Probably I’ve read one too many graphic descriptions of trainyard squishings.

G’Kar finds out the G’Quan Eth was destroyed when the Narn ship’s cargo bay was destroyed - it’s interesting that the Narn language also follows Q with a U.

The cargo staff is working triple hours?! Fuck no, get a union and some more staff. And lowballed construction installed low quality chips. Looks like this is going to be a Working Conditions and Unionization episode. I’m a Union Person through and through. Bring it on.

The G’Quan Eth must be related to the Holy Days of G’Quan that Londo is tormenting him about. And it’s a flower! And Londo Mollari has one, duh. Love their hatred for each other. It’s always entertaining.

Earth won’t fund a higher budget for Babylon 5 safety (how like a government). So the cargo crew are striking! Well done. The words “illegal strike” should enrage everyone, automatically. And motivate them to strike, too.

They’re lucky if they get a four hour turnaround after working a double shift. ye gods. I was already on their side, but now I’m trying to figure out ways to go agitate with them.

Maybe don’t ask Eduardo to be the coolest head. His brother just died. Garibaldi is acting very coplike again, he’s rapidly losing his Limp Dishrag (affectionate) status.

“Look, you’ve made your point and Earth Central will be made aware of your grievances. There’s nothing else you can gain by continuing to strike.”

Baby, those are the magic words that let the workers know that their strike will Hit Em Where It Hurts and Guarantee Change. Don’t back down now.

“You get us decent pay and equipment and hire enough workers to do the job safely, then we return to work. Not a minute before.”

fuck yeah.

🎶I don’t need a rational to sing the International 🎶

Mollari is having a blast tormenting G’Kar, and I’m having a blast watching it!

Honestly I wanna try this G’Quan Eth hallucinogenic. Mollari’s a fuckhead but I think he’d be fun to trip with.

Senator, you know what looks even worse and sets an even worse precedent than striking Dockers Guilds? Your Shining Star of Diplomacy falling down around your ears and killing off your Dockers, of whom you already don’t have enough.

Orin Zento, their best “labour negotiator,” sounds like a union-buster. Fuuuuuuck noooooooo.

🎶 there is power in a union 🎶

I hate Orin Zento already. Such a smarmy shitface.

“I’ll kill [Mollari] with my bare hands! By my [????] there’s nothing to stop me! Sinclair can only kick me off the station! He might even thank me.”

pfffft bahahaha. So good. And Na’Toth’s entire mien for the whole ragefit. So good.

G’Kar: “We all believe in something greater than ourselves, even if it’s just the blind forces of chance.”

Na’Toth: “Chance favors the warrior.”

God I love her.

Gonna figure out how to get onto Babylon 5 and kick Zento’s face in. Blaming the accident on the Dockers, if only by implication? Going to squish his face like a grape.

Well done scruffing up Sinclair. He looks exhausted.

“Beg your pardon Commander, but if someone pushed you, wouldn’t you push back?”

That’s damn right. The state and corporations commit violence against the workers every day, but we’re always blamed and told that violence isn’t the answer once we can’t take the constant violence on ourselves any longer.

Hoping Sinclair refuses to order the soldiers under his command to obey Zento’s orders to attack the civilians. It is bonkers to me that the state is like “yeah let’s side with nonpersons and attack the civilians with the military; that’ll definitely make them loyal and dedicated workers!”

I’d watch a whole tv show about Ms Neeoma Connelly.

The lungs on Ivanova!

Lotta “unfortunately”s being thrown around by people who won’t be in any danger during the conflict.

The Senate has sent replacement workers. Keep em as additional ones, boom, half the problem solved.

Sinclair coming through and being highly pendantic about what “by any means necessary” covers.

“You should never hand someone a gun unless you’re sure where they’ll point. Your mistake.”

This episode should have been called 48 Awake: Sinclair Never Did Get That Nap

alternatively, Sinclair Interprets Regulations and Religion Creatively

The most utopian thing in this show so far: the Senate disagrees with Sinclair’s decision but are letting it stand since public opinion is on the Dockers’ side.

It’s Zento’s choice to feel embarrassed. What does he care if Dockers are paid more? He can claim he was supportive of the move and boost his negotiating reputation further.

hell yeah sci fi unions.

on to the next!

#babylon 5 #neeoma connelly #union! #unionizing #Spotify #woodsfae b5

[thedomtreader]

“AI is the new way of thinking!  We don’t need Hollywood!”

You freaks don’t even know how to use AI, but it’s better than CGI.  Which why the hell is it that CGI looked better in 1991?  It looked better in Forrest Gump, but then suddenly Hollywood was like “Nah this is too hard.”  So let me get this straight, Hollywood starts screeching the 2001 Spielberg movie title, and everyone moves on from “I’ll only see CGI movies” to “AI movies are all I watch now”.   Swear to fuck your dumbass pea brain minds just move on to the next toy without thinking at all.  It’s been called archival footage for years, there’s an early 90s commercial with Paula Abdul where she’s interacting with classic film stars who’ve been dead for decades - archival footage, and again the CGI is far superior back then.  Yet now you brain dead fuckheads act like AI is a new concept.  How the hell does this younger generation function?

This AI craze is a lawsuit fest waiting to happen.  In Rogue One we saw Tarkin, so what?  Peter Cushing died in 1994, what’s the point of his character showing up?  The whole point of Tarkin being in Rogue One was to show off this idiotic technology, Disney was showing off.  Same thing with the Leia scene, didn’t need to be there which sorry didn’t look like Princess Leia at all.  Luke Skywalker in that TV series was close but still flawed.  Unneeded scenes were added to movies and shows to push this technology so we’d want it, and of course everyone fell for it because now all I fucking hear is “AI is the way to go, it’s obsolete”.  It’s theft.  Snatching voices, faces, bits of photography, even brush strokes of famous painters who’ve been dead for centuries.  All this to make a brand new piece of art, and people are bending over backwards to defend it because “it’s obsolete and the future!”  Until the lawsuits come pouring in.  Especially from the estates, and I hope every one of the estates of former Disney performers is ready to attack.  If you don’t know, Walt himself claimed the voice of the Snow White actress, and hurt her career.  Well, if 2023 Disney corporation wants to use AI technology and can you imagine using Annette Funicello’s singing voice or face?  They’d be stupid enough to try that after ignoring her once she was struck with MS.

Already there’s a channel on YouTube where Elvis and Johnny Cash are singing 90s songs, only a matter of time before those estates show up and shut that channel down.  “Waaaah they can’t do that!”  Fuck yes they can because not every estate is poisoned by dollar signs and agendas.  Sorry but Johnny Cash singing Barbie Girl?!  What drugs are you on, he’d never agree to cover that ever!  The only way to make the 90s song happen is to snatch from other Elvis or Cash songs so that they can sing Baby Got Back or Barbie Girl, at the end of the day that is theft. It’s no secret you have to ask permission in order to do a cover song (I’m a musician, was part of a garage band I fucking know how this works), so actually the artists for Barbie Girl and Baby Got Back would I’m sure contact this channel concerning their decision.  At the same time Elvis and Cash’s estate contact the channel, or get one of those strikes via the estate.  You assholes who are saying “I’m an Elvis fan and....” If you were, you’d hate this, let these artists rest.  Enjoy the songs and the movies instead of some dumbass ripping their voices to put out cover songs.  It’s disrespectful to these artists they already existed!  Why make them artificial, the fuck is wrong with you?!  But again, immature brain dead fuckheads who have a new toy have literally no respect, I hope the estates go hard when they find this channel.  Cash singing Barbie Girl, what the serious fuck?  And fuck everyone who finds that funny!

[notallwonder]

Rewatching CM 16x03 "Moose"!

Spoilers and stream of consciousness under the Read More:

Okay so we have a time skip, of undetermined length. At least a few days to a few weeks?

Mr. Fuckhead makes his basket but the ball mysteriously does not fall back to earth before he goes back inside, lol.

"ugh maybe she's a vegan"

Poor Chad has a mean dad who says things like "beta cuck"

Poor Chad also has a bummer haircut, he seems nice otherwise

So the time skip has been long enough that Voit has had time to condition Moose into a murderpuppy...how long is that? And what happened to the girl, did he just steal the dog or do something to her too?

ELEVATOR SCENE! So Rebecca has been working at Quantico on loan from DOJ, or does DOJ have offices at Quantico?

I was wrong before when I said JJ & Penelope's scenes did not give me a sense of their friendship. It's been a while since I've watched early seasons CM, so I'm not even sure I have in my mind a sense of their "specific" friendship. They're great together in this episode, a little bit of banter and a lots of investigatory expsosition. I'm glad they were paired up in this ep.

Also the "cyber" joke is much funnier to me now. I think AJ's delivery is a little sarcastic / flat, so it didn't stand out as a joke to me the first time I watched, but her eye roll made me giggle.

Again, awkward dialogue recapping "this is what we're doing and what we're up against." Almost sounds like a result of moving things around in a later draft.

OH HAI Emily. *insert heart eyes emoji* I really enjoy the little hint of a smile she has while she's reporting to Noodle Bailey - that pride in her team. Her hair in this scene is a DELIGHT (yes I'm obsessed)

Involving Domestic Terrorism might be a bad idea...but involving Counterterrorism seems like a GREAT idea, assuming Agent Jordan Todd may still be there!!! LOL I wish.

Noodle Bailey you're a little bitch

This whole administrative plot does make me think fondly of Erin Strauss. I wonder if Emily has re-evaluated her opinion of Strauss now that she's in that Section Chief position. Prentiss was still with the BAU when Strauss went to and returned from rehab (end of season 7). I wonder if Strauss ever tried to make amends to Emily. I think that could have been an interesting scene. I can see Emily not being enthusiastic about accepting those amends. I liked Jayne Atkinson, and Strauss felt like a more natural villain to me.

I LOVE Rebecca's burgundy peak lapels blazer situtation. *grabby hands*

Emily says being a spotter or drone pilot is like training for being a serial killer - this strikes me as off. I guess if you get trained to lure targets into an area where they will be killed, that's a transferable skill. But on first blush it sounds to me like they're saying that being involved with drone strikes is serial killer training and...you could make that argument about any military position. I don't know, that rubbed me the wrong way a bit. And, turns out that assumption was wrong anyway.

If the remaining episodes don't give me any more Prentiss personal life (still hoping!), I will still be happy if I get more steely-eyed Prentiss standing between Noodle Bailey and her team. Emily, let out those frustrations!

JJ's reactions to Tara dating Rebecca still seem a bit cold to me. Really, there's not much there to read. But, where Prentiss has that obvious lightheartedness from the beginning, JJ comes off as shocked at the initial reveal, then a little brusque/businesslike when interrupting Tara and Rebecca's conversation in this ep. I don't know. Again, there's not much there TO read or read into, it just still feels a bit weird to me.

Not-Hal's thrashing at the end still cracks me up, I guess my brain is broken. Also the guy looks more like Jesse Ferguson (from Modern Family) to me than Hal.

#cm spoilers #cme spoilers #criminal minds spoilers #criminal minds evolution spoilers

[lobotomyclub]

CRYING at this review of this Redead mask

#PLEASEEEEEVSHSNEJDNGNFNFN #fuckhead strikes again #Legend of Zelda #redead #ocarina of time #link legend of zelda #botw

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#296

“Where’s the slave? You did bring one, right?... No! You’re the slave? Is this some sort of a joke? This can’t be. Where’s the slave transporter?... He just left you at my front door? Oh for fuck’s sake. I’m going to throttle that Ryan. I told him I needed a farm hand that’s a fuck slave at night, not a fuck slave for the farm….

“Look at you! You ever work on a farm or a ranch?... Didn’t think so. That’s one scrawny ass body. Speaking of which, why the fuck are you still wearing clothes?... That’s better. You are a bit lean. There are some muscles there.

“Nice ass. I would have been really pissed if you didn’t have that. Still, I would gladly have taken a six-foot three hard working Bubba with a flat ass over you. I really need the muscles out there. Well I guess I’m stuck with you for now. I can’t get you replaced for 6 to 8 weeks. That’s when I need the help the most. Fuck!

“What’s your name?... Not your slave number. I am not calling you four three seven or whatever they had you memorize. What’s the name you grew up with?... Skylar?... Oh fucking hell. Of course it something shitty like Skylar.

“Well Skylar, I might as well tell you what your life is now, at least for the next three months until I decide whether or not to purchase or return you. You are going to be working beside me on my farm here. We have a small amount of livestock we raise, but mostly we produce crops to be sold upstate. This season I’ve already planted seed in sixty acres across… Did you just snicker?...

“Fuckhead! If you think this is going to be one fuck session after another, you are going to be sorely disappointed. Look up at me!... You think ‘planting seed’ is funny? Wipe that grin off your…

“Turdhole, I will strike you ten times harder the next time if you ever pull something like that again. I have no problems with punching, kicking, stepping on piles of shit like you. Like this…. Spread your fucking legs. Wider. Look at those balls of yours. So vulnerable. So fucking vulnerable. That cage they put on you makes your balls easy target. I hate those cages. They prevent balls from flopping all over the place once I kick them. I like seeing that.

“Keep those legs spread. It’s going to happen. Don’t you fucking wince and close your eyes. Look at my fucking steel toe work boot. Know the hell that is about to come your way. Accept the pain.

“BOOM! Now that, shitwipe, is pain. Just think, every morning you will receive one of those to keep your focus where it needs to be. Now take a few moments to gather yourself….

“…Stay still. I need to swap out your collar. This one the Agency gave you is shit. This collar belonged to my dog Bruno before I had to put him down last Spring. I miss him. Loyal and obedient. You don’t deserve to wear his collar. But it is the only one I have programed to the property boundaries. I have no idea if you went to the Agency of your own free will or if you were brought there. I don’t care. To me you are always a flight risk. You get too close to my property line this happens. The current starts off mild but as you get closer to the line you get it ramps up to this. Ha! Ha!

“I also use that collar to train you right. You fuck up, you’ll get shocked immediately. It’s as simple as that. I have controllers all over the property, so don’t even think of trying to snatch it away.

“Move your hands away from your pecker. I want that cage off. Hold still…. There! I like seeing your pecker bouncing about free. Even though it flops free, you won’t ever touch it. Ever. You got that?

“Now every morning I will kick your balls like I just did here. I guess I should go over our routine. I’m going to go over this once, so pay the fuck attention. Every morning, after you fed the animals, you will come up from the barn to the main house at 5:45 you will wake me up with either a blow job or a rim job depending how I am sleeping. You are going to eventually do both. You will drink my morning piss, and you will inhale my morning farts. At 6:15, I will approach the breakfast table. My meal will be waiting, as will you on all fours beside the table. Your balls need to be exposed for the morning kick.

“I will enjoy your suffering while I eat. When I feel I have eaten enough of breakfast, you will eat what I leave for you on my plate. And you eat off the floor. At 6:30 we will head out to the fields, and work until 11:00. We’ll have lunch, and then back to the fields until 4:00.

“You are allowed to wear overalls and boots that’s it. The overalls are made for a man over six feet. You are going to look ridiculous in them, but one good thing is that they’ll drop at a moment’s notice so you can bend over to satisfy my hungry cock.

“After we get back from a hard day in the fields, your role in the house will begin. You will clean me up. That usually starts with a rubbing of my feet and a good tongue bath. I sweat a lot and smell rank, and your tongue is going to lap up as much foulness as possible, especially my armpits and in my crack and on my shithole.

“I’ll relax, while you fix supper. Yours will always be on the floor. In fact your plates will be in the same spot I had for Bruno.

“After dinner will be more relaxing for me and you suffering for me.. Suffering is your way of life now. You will learn that my cock has a voracious appetite, and it craves not only your suffering, but your service, your sacrifice, and your submission. There won’t be a break for you, ever.

“I don’t care if you wanted this life or not. I don’t care if you don’t like how I expect to be served. Hell, I don’t care what your name was or is. You respond however I address you. And it ain’t going to be fucking Skylar.

“The most important thing is that you are to be silent all the time. I am not one for conversation, especially with an inferior slave. Come here. Open your mouth. This gag will be in your mouth for 1 day. I’ll remove it for eating, piss drinking, and sleeping. I’m not a big fan of gags because it takes away easy access to that hole. The padlock is always in front to give you a constant reminder. In the future, you start inappropriately speaking, that gag goes back in. Looks like that gag is already a struggle. Good.

“The other good thing about a gag is that it makes it difficult to breathe, especially when I do this. Fuck yeah maggot, a good gut punch is as effective as a shock to the neck. Like the kick to the balls, a good gut punch will be part of your daily regimen.

“You ready to begin your first day of unbelievable hard labor on the farm? If you aren’t, speak up now. No? Good, we’ll start that in a minute, but first I want to feel your ass muscles around my cock. Get on all fours with your cunt facing up. You need to know that sex with me needs to be just as agonizing as working on the farm. See how fat it is? I always break in a cunt’s cunt with as much brutality as I can. No lube except for my leak. Hey pussy, you really got me leaking. It’s still going to shred you up though.

“Even though you weren’t what I ordered, I think you are going to be exactly what I need. Get ready to scream into that gag. That is one pretty ass. You know, if I decide to keep you, you will be branded. I brand all my animals.”

[beingdreeyore]

Guess who turned up at the house unannounced at 10:30pm last night despite being told he’s not allowed here anymore?

The creepy one strikes again.

Turns out he just decided that the email we all received stating that he had to hand his keys back in and not come to the house at all unless on call and only after providing written notification to us didn’t apply to him.

It’s next level terrifying to be woken at night by the sounds of someone in the house when you think you’re home alone and the only other person with keys is in another city.

When I realised it was him the relief lasted only a second before the rage hit. I stormed out of my room because I am so done with this. So over everything. He was told so clearly that he cannot come on the property without providing written notification that he intends to do so and he ignored that.

Why? Who does that?

A verbal confrontation ensued where he made it clear he didn’t think any rules applied to him and that he didn’t think he’d done anything wrong. He refused to let me speak. He stuck his hand in my face, saying my name over and over again in that smarmy and patronising way that gaslighters like to do. He told me the hospital were wrong and until they physically take his keys off him he has a right to be here. He said I was playing the victim and that everything has worked out so perfectly for me. As if I somehow planned this.

He turned up in the middle of the night and let himself into a house he no longer lives in, without notifying the occupants that he intended to do so, terrifying the only occupant in the process, and he could not fathom for a second that maybe he’d done something wrong.

After nearly ten minutes of him refusing to let me speak I lost it. I screamed at him that he’s a fuckhead and he can’t enter my home late at night without my permission. He can’t do this because both medical admin and common courtesy say he can’t.

And when I say I screamed at him, I mean I screamed at him.

I was still shaking from thinking it had been a stranger in the house. So yes. I yelled. And not in that safe way I’ve done twice now with someone else. I did it like a woman who had thought their life was in danger.

That’s when he left. Quickly. And then I immediately sent another email demanding that something be done because he keeps turning up in the middle of the night to smash around the house after he says he’s moved out. It’s been two weeks of this now.

I didn’t get back to sleep until after 4am. I think I kept shaking for an hour or so after he left- both the anger and also the absolute terror I’d felt when I thought someone was in the house. There was also an uncertainty about whether he was going to come back.

He was forced to hand his keys in first thing this morning. The office manager came and physically showed them to me. They dragged me into a meeting with HR straight after to make sure I was okay. They apologised profusely. Saying again and again how he’d been asked multiple times for his keys and told again and again that he can’t come over without written notice given how he’s behaved.

I didn’t say a word in the meeting because I didn’t know what to say. It’s all so ridiculous and so far beyond belief. His employer told him he can’t come in the house, he did it anyway. Who does that…? Why do they continue to employ him if they truly have a problem with his actions??

He had his own meeting with medical admin this afternoon. It went for a long time. I don’t know what was said or what the outcome was. He no longer has keys and that’s all I really care about. I’m sure he will find ways to punish me for standing up to him, but I’ll survive whatever shit he throws at me on the oncall roster, just like I already have been.

I have a way of attracting drama. I know. It’s not something I like about myself. I know I don’t do it out of boredom, but rather a need for things to be fair and just where they can be. I’m also intolerant of behaviour that crosses into bad guy territory. So I know I contributed in that sense. When he kept turning up I took the bait every time. Because I was determined that the wrong would be corrected. If I’d stepped back and ignored him, it probably wouldn’t have gone this far. I know that. But my brain tells me that I can handle the fallout and someone has to stand up to bullies. So why not me?

Still…

I need to remind myself it’s not my job to police others. It’s not my job to determine what’s right or wrong. I alone don’t get to decide whose behaviour needs correcting. All this drama and stress could’ve been avoided if I’d just backed down. Was this the battle that I really needed to pick…? Did I really need to put myself through this…? Surely it would’ve been easier if I’d just taken a breath and walked away.

Why can’t I be that person?

[woodchoc-magnum]

Lone Star 2x11 Hate Watch

I nearly forgot about it this week, whoops

Disclaimer: Don’t read this if you like the show, simply go about your business and have a great day

oh no owen is being arrested oh nooo

is it for being a crime to this show

is he going to hit on Dr Jacobs now?

"is there a complication?" tk asks in a monotone

Oh no he's off work for a month? What will the other firefighters do at an emergency if rob lowe is not there to do it all for them?

"it's like two fortnights?" yeah… that's exactly what it is dude

A fortnight is two weeks

So two of them is… a month.

Captain Judd!

Yessss captain judd

No masks

Not a single mask on anyone

"the Serena Williams of firefighters?" fucking seriously

What if she was on camera like that and then they lose this car? She's gonna look like an asshole

Yo 100% the husband dies I'm calling it now

He's definitely dying

I FUCKING CALLED IT

Yo that's HUBRIS

That's why you don't brag to the cameras y'all

Damn that poor bastard what a way to go

This reminds me of when Bobby was under investigation in season 2 of the OG and they all kept coming around to his house and annoying the shit out of him while he was trying to plan his wedding

BILLY? BILLY BURKE?

BILLY BURKE!!!!!!!!

Yo he was in this show called Revolution that I watched because a) Billy Burke and b) Elizabeth Mitchell and I fuck I shipped him with Liz Mitch SO HARD

It's weird to me that everyone thinks of him as the dad from Twilight because I have legit seen him in everything but that

What happened to his lightning strike scars? That was my favourite part of Season 1

So I'm calling it early and saying that Billy Burke is the arsonist because why else would they bring him back, and he doesn't like Rob Lowe

Oh the gays are hosting a dinner party

You know what shits me? Lone Star has these scenes of the team playing board games and in the OG we waste a whole episode about Josh and Sue – yes I'm still dirty but they can make it up to me with this week’s episode

I suppose in Lone Star they're all single? And young? I really shouldn't complain, I don't want the OG to be more like Lone Star let's face it

Yeah she's going viral for acting like a moron in front of the cameras at the scene, that's why you don't do that fucking shit

Look I like Marjan but come on

Interesting choice of Rolling Stones song

Wow this Rob Lowe montage is so great

Am I the only one who thinks Airpods look dumb

God this Rob Lowe montage has been going for hours

Wow he's potting a plant, and painting, and putting a puzzle together, this is so fucking interesting, thank god they've dedicated this portion of the episode to it. How else would I know what Rob Lowe was doing while he was stuck at home by himself?

The chick who works at the juice bar is a better actor than Ronen

Oh no this looks like the work of the arsonist (Billy Burke)

Thank god Rob Lowe was there right

YOU'RE NOT THE CAPTAIN RIGHT NOW

God what a fuckhead

"126! Give 'em hell!" ugh what a douchebag

How am I only 23 minutes in

I feel like I've been watching for ten hours

Yeah how did you arrive five minutes before everyone huh? I feel like that app he's been listening to is probably illegal

Owen is doing nothing to help his case here

This guy 100% thinks Owen did it and you know what I think he's onto something and I think they should arrest Owen and put him in jail

Also I'm going to say that rob lowe dyes his hair and has had some cosmetic surgery just saying

Honestly I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for Marjan here

It’s just kind of in bad taste for a firefighter to be bragging about how awesome they are. I know social media is her whole deal but… it's pretty uncool

Is it just me or is Judd looking extra handsome in this episode?

Oh great and now we're at a nice dinner and they're talking about Rob fucking Lowe again? WHO CARES

THE ROB LOWE PLOTLIONES ARE ALWAYS THE WORST FUCKING PLOTLINES

He even looks like a creep in that grey hoodie

Oh my god he's been off work for a fucking week? Like I don't get this?

I would love to have a week off work to just stay in my house and be chill

He's talking to Billy Burke about the arson and Billy Burke is in fact the arsonist

Yo doesn't Carlos' house burn down at some point? DOES BILLY BURKE BURN DOWN CARLOS' HOUSE?

I really love Billy Burke and I'm glad they brought him back to play the bad guy; he was the bad guy in The Closer and it was great

He's explaining all this to Billy Burke, who in fact already knows this, because in fact he is IN FACT the arsonist

Also the fact that Rob Lowe has gone out and bought all this stuff just makes him look guiltier

I ship it though, Billy & Owen? Ship name Billwen or Owlly – no we're definitely going with Owlly

Stage 3 cancer, lost his job, got struck by lightning, didn't get the captaincy at the 126 – the man has nothing left to lose. He's the arsonist

Marjan IS a showboat and most of the time it's fine but before a rescue it does exhibit a lot of hubris and that's not a good thing

And that video didn't make her look great

And she needs to go to McKenna and apologise for being a dick

GO AND APOLOGISE

Fucking APOLOGISE

YES YOU SHOULD

Oh good she listened to me

Paul's a babe just saying

She posted a suicide note and no friends or family went to help her? That's pretty fucking depressing

Jesus this is a bit graphic

Wow this is very graphic

"This was clutch" COME ON FUCKING REALLY?

Oh yeah it's so fucking cool being a badass

Ugh this show is so stupid

How does this still have three minutes to go?

"Oh my god I FORGOT THE LIMES" it is the END OF THE WORLD

Why is he in his goddamn fucking arson hoodie again?

He is without a doubt the dumbest mother fucker who has ever dumbed in the history of BEING DUMB

I mean say what you want about Bobby jumping into a dumpster but I have to think that Bobby Nash would know better than to act like a suspicious fucking SUSPECT IN THE MIDDLE OF AN ARSON INVESTIGATION WHEN THEY ALREADY SUSPECT YOU OF BEING THE ARSONIST, OWEN!

You dumbfuck

0/10 shittiest episode ever, everyone except Judd, Grace and Tommy are stupid

AND OH MY GOD TK WE FORGOT THE LIMESSSSS OH MY GOD END OF THE WORLLLLDDDD

three miserable fucking episodes to go

Diaz to cleanse:

#lone star hate watch #this show keeps getting woooooorse

[were-all-going-to-hell-goodbye]

Lmao, No Title Yet

So, the prolage is just my past life, then the afterlife (my ideal version of it), and then a sneak peak into my next life, tell me what I can fix and I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT <3 @beany1988 

TRIGGER WARNING: Abuse, emotional and mention of physical, non-discriptive. Vague character death

‘The music. Just focus on the music.’

It was harder said-thought?- than done. I was only allowed one headphone in, even though I’m ignored most of the time, and she was screaming in my ear.

“YOU’RE SO FUCKING DISRESPECTFUL! I ASK YOU TO DO ONE THING, ONE GOD DAMNED THING AND YOU DON’T DO SHIT! ALL YOU DO IS STAY ON THAT COMPUTER ALL DAY!”

I make sure not to roll my eyes.

‘Sure, I “don’t do shit”. More like I do everything, your fatass can’t even sit up to turn your own lamp off. But yeah, I don’t do shit.’

Vaguely, as she continually screams insults and lies at me, I notice that we’re speeding up.

‘I wonder what would happen if I jumped out onto the highway.’

My fingers twitch.

‘The. Fucking. Music.’

Oh I hope someday I’ll make it out of here. Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

‘Fuck’

“YOU’RE ALLWAYS OVER THERE FUCKING SMIRKING- I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO YOUR MAMA WHEN SHE TOLD ME ABOUT YOU, WHEN THEY ALL TOLD ME—”

‘liar liar liar liarLIARLIARLIAR—’

“LIAR!”

Fuck, I didn’t mean to say it out loud fuck fuck fuc-

My head is to the side. My earbuds are on my lap. The trees are going by too fast.

‘Did….did she just…?’

My cheek hurts and I feel something warm running down it. Slowly, I turn back to face her. She looks proud. Her wedding ring is dripping blood. My blood.

The next instant, I’m dead.

*******

Hades is sitting in front of me, his wife by his side.

“Oh, such a shame for someone like you to die so young.”

The words strike a chord in me.

“S-someone like me?”

‘Shut up you idiot! He’s a god, oh gods bow you fuckhead!!!!’

“There’s no need to bow you know.”

Slowly I look up and meet the Queens eyes. She’s just as beautiful as I imagined.

‘Wait, no, gay thoughts B E G O N E’

She glides towards me as I stare, until she’s standing right in front of me.

“And to answer your question. We meant someone as bright as you. You could have gone on to do incredible things.”

I shake my head. There’s no way I could have done anything good with my life.

“It’s true.”

I shift my eyes over to god.

“Remember all those talks you had with your grandfather? Funding a hospital so if someone needed help, you would pay for it. Buying a mansion and turning it into an orphanage. Even you just wistfully thinking that if you became famous, you would visit schools and such, just to bring a smile to someone’s face. Any of that ringing a bell?”

My chest tightens. All my wistful thinking, planning, dreams…. I could have done that? Suddenly, a wave of hate washes over me.

“If. If I had lived, I wouldn’t have ended like her, right?”

‘I promised myself.’

I didn’t notice my fist were clinched until I felt the pain of my finger nails cutting into my palms and Persephone lifting them up. The blood rolled down my arms in rivets.

“No.” she says quietly, as if lulling a child to sleep, “You were better.”

And for the first time, in a long time, I let myself feel.

I didn’t bother to stop the tears.

*******

It’s not too long before I calm myself, and Persephone heads off to attend to her duties.

Hades and I sit in silence, him, on his throne, and myself at the foot of it. The silence is comforting, in its own way.

“I heard you.” I look up.

He’s looking down at me, a certain kind of softness in his eyes that begin to fill the gaping hole in my heart.

He takes my silence as an invitation to continue.

“Those times you spoke of the afterlife… and your wishes to be reborn as my daughter.”

I flush but don’t say anything.

“You know, not many wishes to be acquainted to me in anyway, let alone in a familiar.”

I mutter under my breath, knowing how the story goes.

“What was that?”

I freeze, then repeat what I said louder.

“Humanity fears what it doesn’t understand, hating the uncertainty. Death and what comes after is the most unknown certainty that we understand.”

He hums and goes silent. I wait a moment before zoning out again.

But nothin' is better sometimes/ Once we've both said our goodbyes/ Let's just let it go/ Let me let you go

‘Hmmm, zone back in zone back fucking in!’

“What would you say, if I said I could send you to any world you wish with your memories intact?”

If I could raise a single eyebrow, I would. However, I can’t, so I settle for answering the question.

“At what cost?”

He looks amused in a sad sort of way.

“The number 3 is a sacred number to the Greeks. The Big Three, the three fates, so on and so forth. So, to have one life, you are to have two others after it before you are free the pass or be reborn like any other soul.”

I look down.

“Any other soul, huh? So why me?”

I can practically hear the smirk in his voice.

“Why not?”

‘Yeah. Why not.’

*******

I open my eyes to knocking on the door. I look over at the garish clock, seeing it read 7:00 am in large red numbers.

I lay in bed as a process what ever the living fuck my life is. Was. Going to be.

‘I’m alive. I died. I’m a guy. I’m all alone again. Persephone’s a pan girl’s guy’s dream. Hades is an ass.’

I pause for a moment, trying to remember my actual last point.

The knocking comes again, this time more insistent than before.

“Izuku, sweetie, you need to get up now. I need to head out soon for work.”

Oh yeah.

‘I’m Midoriya fucking Izuku.’

#mha #bnha #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha fic #mha fic #self insert #bnha self insert #mha self insert #greek mythology #midoriya izuku #inko midoriya #fanfic #fanfiction #my writing