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#fueled by thc
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dont do drugs kids
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royalcannabissupply · 2 years
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arsonicversed · 2 years
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Tayuya headcanon - Music
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The nature of Tayuya’s genjutsu is based in sound. While she can orchestrate her demons through the movements of her fingers similar to puppets her jutsu is performed mostly through sound.
The louder the sound is the more intense, powerful, and long lasting it can be.
The flute she has is sentimental, given to her to train with and is by far the easiest instrument to easily carry around while still being loud enough to be effective.
She can still do her jutsu through smaller sounds, namely whistling but it is not nearly as powerful or dangerous.
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brewed-pangolin · 1 month
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Soap MacTavish has a sweet tooth.
He once mistakenly ate an entire plate of freshly made brownies in one sitting while you were out purchasing a quick grocery list, thinking it was your usual recipe.
As you entered your home, your eyes immediately went to the empty metal tray that sat on your counter as you took in the sight of the crested Scotsman splayed out over your couch.
Quietly, with only the slightest aggravated smirk, you stepped towards him as his glazed eyes mindlessly followed the images of SpongeBob flashing on the expansive TV screen.
"John," you said with a hushed tone. Patrick's voice echoing behind your shoulder as Soap's eyes lazily moved to meet your questioning stare.
"How ya feelin', babe?"
He answered simply with a smile. Unable to speak as the effects of copious amounts of THC coursed through his veins and clouded his mind as you gazed upon him, lovingly rolling your eyes at his mind-numbing state.
"Yeah. That ain't nothing yet."
You sat by his side for the next 10 hours as he rode out the high he had so inadvertently thrown upon himself. Only moving when he muttered 'got'a pee, lass', which was a feat upon itself as you shouldered the inebriated Scotsman ever so carefully down the hall to the bathroom (yes, you helped him because you love him and he's too embarrassed and high to ask)
You vowed never to leave a tray of special brownies unattended if you knew he were to be home alone. The man could not be trusted, especially since he had no discipline around your expert baking.
And you'd hide the newly made gummy bears in an inconspicuous container. Margarine, perhaps. Anything to keep his greedy hands from embarking on yet another cannabis fueled adventure.
Although you'd be lying if you didn't love the dopey smile he gave you as you rode him on the couch. Limp body with a throbbing dick. Accompanied by a dilated stare that melted your heart as you pulled the most delicious moan of your name from between his permanently kissable lips.
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budandtender · 8 months
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Cannabis: A Multifaceted Plant for a Multitude of Uses
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Introduction
Cannabis, a plant that has been a part of human history for thousands of years, is experiencing a resurgence in popularity as its myriad of uses become increasingly recognised. From its strong fibres used in textiles and paper to its nutritional and medicinal properties, cannabis has proven itself to be a truly multipurpose plant. This article will delve into the various aspects of this versatile plant and explore how it has been utilised throughout history and across cultures.
The History of Hemp: A Material with Unmatched Strength
One of the most well-known uses of cannabis is in the production of hemp, a material derived from the plant's strong fibres. These fibres have been used for millennia to create durable cloth, rope, and paper. The Vikings, known for their seafaring prowess, utilised hemp to construct sails for their ships, enabling them to voyage from Scandinavia to Nova Scotia. In the United States, Betsy Ross sewed the first flag from hempen cloth, and the Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper. Even the now obsolete German currency, Deutsche Mark, were once printed on hemp paper.
The use of hemp extended beyond these applications, as seen in the Netherlands, where windmills were built specifically to crush hemp stalks. This demonstrates the importance of hemp in various industries and highlights the plant's incredible versatility.
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Cannabis as a Nutritional Powerhouse
While the strength of its fibres may have initially attracted humans to the cannabis plant, its potential as a food source likely played a significant role in its widespread cultivation. Cannabis seeds, or hempseeds, are packed with essential nutrients such as polyunsaturated fats, essential fatty acids, and proteins. These qualities qualify hempseed as a functional food, meaning it provides health benefits beyond basic nutrition.
For over three thousand years, Asian cultures have utilised hempseed as both a food and a medicine. Despite the prohibition of cannabis products in the United States, hempseed has been allowed for use in food over the last two decades. This highlights the recognition of its nutritional value and potential health benefits.
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Cannabis Resin: A Source of Medicinal and Psychoactive Compounds
The resin produced by the cannabis plant is another aspect that has garnered significant attention due to its medicinal and psychoactive properties. The compounds found in cannabis resin, such as THC (tetrahydrocannabinol) and CBD (cannabidiol), have been the focus of breeding efforts to increase their production. These efforts have led to the development of various cannabis drug chemotypes around the world, with some cultivars producing only THC, others producing both THC and CBD, and a few expressing propyl THCV (tetrahydrocannabivarin) and/or CBDV (cannabidivarin).
The medicinal uses of cannabis resin have been widely researched, with evidence suggesting its effectiveness in treating conditions such as chronic pain, epilepsy, multiple sclerosis, and more. The psychoactive effects of THC have also led to the recreational use of cannabis, which has sparked debates surrounding its legalisation and regulation.
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Environmental Benefits of Cannabis Cultivation
In addition to its myriad uses, cannabis cultivation offers several environmental benefits. Hemp plants are known to absorb large amounts of carbon dioxide, making them an effective tool in combating climate change. Furthermore, hemp requires fewer pesticides and herbicides than many other crops, reducing the environmental impact of agriculture.
Cannabis can also be used as a source of biofuel, offering a renewable and eco-friendly alternative to fossil fuels. Additionally, the fast growth rate and low water requirements of hemp make it a sustainable crop, capable of providing resources without causing significant strain on natural resources.
Conclusion
Cannabis is a truly remarkable plant, with applications ranging from textiles and paper to nutrition and medicine. As society continues to recognise its numerous benefits, it is likely that the cultivation and use of cannabis will only continue to grow. By embracing this versatile plant, we can harness its potential to improve our health, industries, and environment for generations to come.
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queercoshon · 2 years
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You hadn't quite meant for the night to end this way, but you did nothing to stop it either.
You were invited to a friend's house for movies, food, and weed. You stocked up on snacks and your favourite strain and headed over, hoping you had enough food. You'd been smoking a lot more, and the munchies were what was making all your clothes tight.
Your friend was already stoned when you arrived, so you huff down a blunt as fast as possible. As soon as the dumb comedy movie goes on, you break open your snacks.
You don't stop eating the entire movie, alternating between salty and sweet, and of course copious amounts of soda. By the end of it you've eaten 2 family bags of chips, a sharable bag of candy, a whole package of cookies, and nearly 2 litres of soda. You look rounded out, and can feel the tautness in your gut, but the munchies cling tight.
Your friend wants another blunt and a food order before the next movie. You probably should have put in the order before smoking up, but you scroll through the app adding whatever your stoned little heart desires, which is a lot.
Now you're so high you feel like your floating, and the weed has convinced you the pain in your gut is extreme hunger, and not from being crammed full of junk food.
Your friend is just as afflicted, and has gotten each of you another bag of chips. You finish the 2L and hope the delivery shows up soon; dry mouth is a killer.
You're 15 minutes into the next movie when the food arrives. You both shuffle to the door, knowing one person can't carry everything.
The spread on the coffee table is a feast for hogs. Double dash has enabled your thc-fueled desires, so food from the chain pizza place and from McDonald's blanket the coffee table. Large cheese pizza, garlic breadsticks, wings, dessert pizza, fries from both locations, burgers, nuggets, milkshakes, pies, soda. Your stomach gurgles as you lean forward to dig in.
The next hour and 30 minutes are a haze of gorging. By the end of the movie, both of you have undone your pants and your guts are hanging out of your shirts. There's still food left, but leaning forward is far too much movement for your overtaxed middle.
You feel heavy. Heavy from the blanket of the high, and absolutely massive from the thousands of calories you just scarfed down. Your belly groans, and you can't stop burping. You rub your belly, moaning a little, the sensation of high belly rubs over a stuffed gut sending you to euphoric bliss.
As the credits roll, your friend manages to heave themself to their feet, a string of belches getting dislodged in the process. They hand you yet another blunt and waddle off to the bathroom. Too stoned to think about it, you light up and puff away, melting into the couch, becoming dumb, happy, and oh so suggestable.
You're just about done the roach when your buddy comes back. They move the food onto the couch beside you, and you feel like you could eat again, despite the fact you're struggling to breathe around your belly.
They put on another stupid movie and pull you to lean against them. You do so happily, their warmth lulling you to a comfortable bliss.
They start rubbing your gut, making you burp. Soon they're holding the leftover breadsticks to your mouth, and you're mindlessly chewing away. You're so far gone you can't register what's happening. The food never stops coming, and you never turn away, not even when it feels like you have to fight to swallow and keep it down.
By the end of the 3rd movie, you're listless. All you can do is moan and burp, your ability to talk zapped by weed and food coma. Your usually flabby gut is a rock solid dome with a good layer of pudge. You couldn't move if your life depended on it.
Your friend rubs your belly, working out the gas bubbles and lulling you to sleep. They prop you up just a little and pull a blanket over you.
As you drift off, gut gurgling up a storm, you think about how fun it'll be to do this all again next week, this time at your place.
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hellbound-n-heartless · 2 months
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Have you had water today?
I, like every other self respecting engineer, am fueled solely by caffeine and hatred. Calmed by ibuprofen and THC.
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potsmart · 4 months
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What’s the Deal with Kush? The Origin of a Classic Strain
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Before we get into the article about what the deal with Kush is, here is an actual deal on Kush, delivered to your door in Canada. Rad.
Everyone knows Kush means quality. There’s a built in expectation that the weed should slap if it bears the classic name. It’s also a well known parent to many classic varietals. Before the names O.G. Kush, Chem Dog, and Cookies became household among growers worldwide, there existed a time when the Kush strain remained relatively obscure. Let’s look into the intriguing history of the Kush strain and its transformation into one of the most renowned medical marijuana varieties globally.
Just like any other modern cannabis seed strain, landraces played a pivotal role in establishing the fundamental genetic foundations of everything we smoke today with the Kush name on it. Numerous countries harbour a diverse array of marijuana landraces, thriving particularly in regions characterized by hot climates and mountainous terrain. In these areas, expansive fields of landrace cannabis plants flourish organically. Owing to the cannabis plant’s inherent robustness, these fields have been subject to countless generations of natural backcrossing over the span of hundreds, if not thousands of years.
Among the most well-known Kush varieties today are Hindu Kush, Master Kush, and Afghan Kush, all originating from these locations as original landraces. Through meticulous backcrossing efforts, breeders sought to unearth the quintessential phenotype for cannabis cultivation. Since its introduction in Amsterdam nearly three decades ago, numerous seed banks now offer a broad spectrum of landraces and hybrids, with many of the original landrace strains still available to enthusiasts.
The Kush cannabis strain found its way to Amsterdam during the late 1970s or early 1980s, carried by intrepid cannabis enthusiasts who ventured through the rugged landscapes of the Himalayas, spanning Pakistan, India, and Afghanistan. They returned with seeds sourced from the Hindu Kush mountain range, nestled between northern Pakistan and Afghanistan. The name “Kush” derives from this region and intriguingly translates to “killer” in ancient Persian.
The aromatic profile, taste, and effects of Kush strains are the key attributes that make them highly sought after both in the context of a coffee shop’s offerings and for growers. The scent of this medical marijuana variety is unmistakable, often likened to the odour of jet fuel and characterized by a pungent, dank, and lemony quality. The potency of the Kush aroma is such that even the tiniest dried bud can fill a room with its distinctive fragrance. When it comes to taste, a well-cultivated Kush strain mirrors its aroma but adds a lingering jet fuel undertone that lingers with every puff, creating a truly unique and memorable experience. Typical of other heavy Indicas, real kush plants stay short with tight internodal spacing, creating dense foliage and buds. The plants finish quickly and produce well, making them a favourite for more modern growers all over the world for decades.
A joint of OG Kush, like I posted above, will transform the surrounding air, saturating it with a dense, rich, and almost viscous quality. A few puffs of this potent strain with its unmistakable jet fuel aroma will promptly initiate a profound shift in your state of mind and body. The initial effects manifest as heavy eyelids and an almost immediate sense of being pleasantly stoned. Energy levels plummet, and motivation wanes, ultimately leading to a state of complete relaxation and tranquility. Notably, the THC content in Kush varieties has consistently been subjected to testing, with results often exceeding the 20% threshold.
Kush strains are renowned for their robust pain-relief properties. Whether smoked or incorporated into edibles, the medicinal impact of Kush is often likened to a nearly narcotic experience. It proves highly effective in addressing a range of conditions, including insomnia, appetite loss, and anxiety. Patients grappling with pain stemming from bone, nerve, or muscle issues also find considerable relief through Kush usage. For those coping with conditions like Multiple Sclerosis, Parkinson’s, and a multitude of other illnesses, medicating with Kush and similar indica strains has proven to be indispensable.
Cancer patients, in particular, derive substantial benefits from Kush, often experiencing relief that surpasses the effectiveness of pharmaceutical resources. Many report improved appetite, better sleep, and the restoration of regular bowel function when incorporating this cannabis strain into their treatment plans.
While sativa strains are typically favoured by patients seeking heightened energy levels and motivation, Kush continues to hold appeal for many due to its potent anti-inflammatory and pain-relieving effects. Recognizing this, numerous breeders, including Spliff Seeds, are now focusing on developing Kush hybrids that aim to preserve its distinctive medicinal potency while mitigating its pronounced couch-locking effect. One such example is Spliff Blue Medi Kush, a strain developed in collaboration with medical marijuana users, tailored to serve precisely this purpose.
If you’re looking for a classic you can’t miss with a well grown Kush strain.
By Meso Potamia, Ganja Guy, for Potsmart
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sunwarmed-ash · 6 months
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🌻😉
oh fuck me, what was the sunflower again?? lemme go check the archives
Oh yeah! i'll tell ya whatever the fuck I want!
well alright, right now i'm in the midst of this eden club update wishing I could just ff through Hank and Con's talk and just get to the make up sex. because an emotional three way with gavin and hank is just what connor needs to heal.
probs what they all need! I know i also need it
also, im listening to Hot Mulligan alot lately and I think if I was a Z'er *Equip Sunglasses* would have been my emo inception song.
For me it was teenagers by MCR. I saw it on MTV and I was like, that, that's it exactly. that's who i am, who i want to be, what i want to look like, and ugh being an emo helped me understand my lil baby queer self better than most things 😂
thanks for listening to my caffeine thc and adhd fueled rambles babe
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dankdeliverydc · 8 months
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Strain Information: 3.5 gram gift per donation
Indica Dominant Hybrid - 70% Indica / 30% Sativa THC: 16%
Ice Cream Man is a rare indica dominant hybrid strain created through crossing the powerful Jet Fuel Gelato X Legend Orange Apricot strains. Known for its deliciously creamy flavor, Ice Cream Man packs a punch of effects that will have you feeling lifted and pretty aroused in no time at all. Each inhale brings on tastes of sweet berries and fruits alongside sharp citrus and peppery fuel.
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rin-and-jade · 11 months
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Hi hi,
I’m curious if you have any information about how weed or THC interact with DID? Also how antipsychotics (specifically abilify) interact with DID?
Context: I had edibles for the first time w friends the other night and they warned me that thc could make me unmask my autistic traits (it did) and that eventually caused a huge panic attack. After a while though I started age regressing, rapid switching, and arguing with myself. My friends are convinced it was real, that I was talking to alters and that I have DID. Theyre so sure too because I was using those words (I have a special interest in abnormal psych so I’m familiar with DID and OSDD). But I don’t know what to do next. Would it even be safe to try another edible and hope I can confirm or deny that this was all real? I also started an antipsychotic on the same day, so could it be that? Would antipsychotics make alters come out if they hadn’t been out before? I’m pretty sure it’s always just been me, but is that even possible? /genq
Im just very confused and scared and I don’t know what to do next. Any advice or information would be oh so greatly appreciated. I’m trying to stay logical and educated before I jump into anything. /gen
Thankyou for asking this genuine question because this seems like a serious issue for you, and for the opening of my explanation,, you should NEVER take another edible, you did the right thing waiting for me to answer it since i have some info of how certain drugs affect people neurologically. And yes, it can cause things like switching and age regression because the chemicals are out of balance, the chances of an alter coming out due to antispychotics is depending on dosage, and how effective the meds are so i can't answer this.
Moving on to main point.
So, the fact that you're taking antipsychotics, and then you take some THC, these two are enemies, the effects are 180 degrees the opposite, and unlike how acid and alkaline can neutralize itself (well this is for context, because these two are also enemies) medications do not most of the time, and not only that, it will make a jumble of mess. because weed is what "accelerates" your brain while antispychotics acts as a "sedative", and there's no other sure answer other than these two combination, will causes adverse effects depending on which alter (yeah they all have different resistance and severity in terms of taking in medications) takes it, but in general, it's still not a beautiful sight and it'll have similar outcomes.
In conclusion, when i said never, that means never ever, because the chances of you taking antipsychotics means you experience some psychotic symptoms and it needs to be treated, and if you have psychotic symptoms, psychoactive drugs (like THC before) should be banned from your life since it adds fire to the fuel.
My advice on what you can do next is educate yourself, and you should consult healthcare providers before doing something or atleast learn from goverment/lab papers to make sure whatever you're going to do won't end up horribly. I hope this answer satisfies you.
- j
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toxoplasmewsis · 1 year
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i encourage men to smoke weed because i read an article about how the thc leads to higher chances of testicular cancer and idk if it's true or not, but it's like... hey now.... you're an all-star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older But the meteor man beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin The water's getting warm so you might as well swim My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored
Hey, now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold
Go for the moon Go for the moon Go for the moon Go for the moon
Hey, now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars
Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas I need to get myself away from this place I said yep, what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running Didn't make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do, so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go You'll never shine if you don't glow
Hey, now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold
And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold
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Your medical implant or food wrapper could someday be made of CBD
With the legalization of hemp cultivation, products containing cannabidiol (CBD) have become popular. Many of these oils and creams claim to alleviate pain and other conditions, and now, new research reported in ACS Applied Materials & Interfaces suggests that CBD could have another function: as a bioplastic. The research team created a CBD-based bioplastic material that could one day be used in medical implants, food wrappers and more.
Cannabis (Cannabis sativa) is well known for the euphoric "high" it gives users, caused by a chemical called tetrahydrocannabinol (THC). Another component, CBD, is responsible for feelings of relaxation and calmness, but unlike THC, it doesn't produce a high. In hemp plants bred to contain little-to-no THC, CBD can make up to 20% of the plant's weight. Because it's now federally legal in the U.S. to grow hemp, the price of CBD has dropped dramatically, opening up the possibility of using CBD in other applications.
In recent years, the bioplastic called poly(lactic acid), or PLA, has become a popular option for sustainable plastics because it's made from corn and sugarcane instead of fossil fuels, and can be industrially composted. Many single-use consumer goods, such as utensils and soda bottles, as well as medical devices, such as facial fillers and implants, now contain PLA. Just as lactic acid is a good building block for PLA, CBD's chemical structure also has the right stuff to be repeated as a polymer. So, Gregory Sotzing, Lakshmi Nair and colleagues wanted to see whether CBD could be used to make a new bioplastic.
Read more.
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arsonicversed · 2 years
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Finally finished Tayuya’s muse/about section. Under the cut are my 2 canon-divergent verses of what I’ve written for her still being alive during/after the war. Ofc you’re also able to interact with her before she canonically dies as well, but my default verse will be during the blank period, post war, in the divergence unless otherwise specified.
DIVERGANCE 1: FLEEING THE SOUND (DEFAULT)
Playing dead, she used her summons to help lessen the brunt of the tree falling on her buse used her intelligence to fool the opponent into thinking she had been crushed. Thankfully neither of them seemed to keen on taking her body back for proof of her defeat and death and as such she was able to escape. Not able to go back to Orochimaru after such a defeat she retreats to an unmarked nation and traveling around she does what she can to survive and earn money. Most of the time playing music or trapping people in a genjutsu in order to steal from them. There was no intention to ever go back to Orochimaru or deal with any of the hidden villages again.
That was until the war. Approached by Kabuto she is given a second chance to get revenge on the people who had almost killed her especially the Nara. With the resurrected bodies of her former teammates she works with them to exact their revenge. Further bad luck would be on her side as they would be defeated once more but not killed. Her teammates sealed away so their bodies are no longer reanimated, Tayuya would be captured and brought back to Konoha to face justice. Residing now within the walls of the village she waits to know what they will do with her.
DIVERGANCE 2: KONOHA'S REHABILITATION
Hit by the trees and falling debris of the forest Tayuya is knocked unconscious with severe wounds. Still alive she tries to make an escape only for Temari to see she is still moving and attempt to end it. It's mercy from Shikamaru that stops Temari and reasons Tayuya would be useful to Konoha alive to interrogate and obtain information from. Temari in this would drag both a heavily wounded Tayuya and Shikamaru back to Konoha. Tayuya while in custody would refuse to answer any questions, being stubborn as always she would be rude to any person speaking to her, bite, scratch, and attack anyone she could get her hands on. Attempts to escape did not go well as even with her flute and other items taken she still tried to use her musical based Genjutsu abilities to break out. One such attempt almost succeeded but since then took precautions to wear items to block sound when dealing with her. Of course it made interrogation difficult but that was what reading lips was for.
Eventually she would see no point in continuing her tirade. Negotiating with Konoha she agrees to give them information in return for protection form Orochimaru and any retaliation he may take on her. Living within the village she is still forced into a sort-of probation within the village. Given a very basic home she is to continue giving information about Orochimaru, the sound, and her curse mark for as long as she resides and must check in with members of the police force every other day. Such freedoms will be retracted if she breaks any of their laws or causes too much trouble.
For most of the time in the village she is barred from continuation of training her curse mark or other abilities. Only is she allowed to train if she has a member of Chuinin rank or higher oversee it. They are to take any measure to ensure she does not try to escape during her training up to and including killing her.
During the subsequent events Tayuya keeps a low profile as many villages tend to keep their distance due to her past affiliation and very rude and abrasive attitude. During Pein's assault she is, just as others, killed in the attack and brought back. The experience of death terrifying her to no end and as such keeps to herself even more. As the 4th great shinobi war starts to count down she continues to stay out of it until she is approached by Kabuto who is able to manipulate her into helping him.
Becoming a traitor once more, she does not do this to help Kabuto, but to quell the rage she had stored for years of being a prisoner within Konoha's walls. Although her plan for revenge doesn't end well and ends in her defeat once more, and just as before she is dragged back to the village once more.
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poisonouswritings · 2 years
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Sage and MC living on Earth and taking Sage to therapy cuz babyboy my kitten man my joy❤️ you need it :3
I like how this implies that there's no therapists on Astraea
GN!Reader, I've thought about this a lot actually, not me with my stoner agenda, pretty vague drug/alcohol addiction mention, depression symptoms/depictions, mental health stuff in general ig, i had to add a readmore because i have many thoughts, I think Sage internalized the effects of his trauma a lot in the final few chapters of the story but once he actually has time to breathe and feel safe with you the months and years of it all build up and explode on him
Okay so like,, *pats Sage's head* this bad boy can fit so much trauma in him
This is post-game so it's the first time in months that Sage has had the chance to just breathe. And once he's adjusted to Earth (which takes a little bit. Initially he's afraid of basically everything because it's all so unfamiliar and he's been in fight-mode for half a year) some of the anxieties start to settle. But some of them don't. Like you thought he'd stop following you around everywhere once he realizes that No Just Because A Car Honks Doesn't Mean It's Gonna Eat You but apparently not.
No I make jokes but he thought Gramme killed you before and then you nearly died during the fight with LoS so like he is terrified of losing you again. And I think he always kinda followed you around before anyways (because he's an attention whore of a cat and just really loves being around you) but now he gets legitimately anxious if you're out of his sight for too long. His cat instincts don't help. Like you have to leave for work once and you're gone for six hours or so and you come back and the apartment is completely trashed (anxious zoomies) and he's huddled in the corner having a massive panic attack.
That's what finally gets him to agree to therapy.
You gotta like,, because you're on Earth so you have to translate all the Astraean stuff into Earth stuff. The stuff about Sage growing up on the street and taking care of Tulsi and being in a gang and whatever, change a few little details here and there and it's fine. But when it comes to the magic stuff,, 'corruption' becomes 'drug use' (and I think that's decently suitable because it's a weird substance (the potions) that makes you have a severe emotional and physical reaction that's usually destructive and Sage has admitted to feeling addicted to the feeling before and wanting to give in to it. also just,, with his background in general drug addiction would be kinda expected so it's easy to get the therapist to roll with it so), your six-month disappearance became a six-month coma caused by Gramme (I think Gramme was kind of a father figure to all the Starsworn and honestly no matter which theory you believe (Gramme was always LoS from the very beginning vs Gramme really did die in the battle and LoS basically just stole his body/appearance) it's gonna fuck Sage up a lil) and that at the same time Sage was incapacitated and disfigured and he couldn't do anything to protect you, and the LoS fight a drug-fueled confrontation where Gramme nearly killed you again. Lucan and Balsam both OD'ed and tried to kill Sage/you (respectively) and Sage had to kill them as a result. Etc etc.
He just has,, such a laundry list of trauma and unhealthy coping mechanisms,,,, this is gonna take a while. Honestly the therapist wants to refer him to a psychiatrist because he desperately needs some form of anxiety medication but like,, Sage doesn't have medical records,,,, so she just suggests weed. And I say this with some authority because my sister's therapist just flat-out told her to take some THC when the anxiety got too bad, so. You have to make sure he doesn't overdo it but I think as long as he (meaning you) are responsible he should be just fine.
You have to sit in the first couple of sessions. Gradually the therapist asks you to sit outside a little bit at a time. The first time Sage only makes it seven minutes before coming out to check on you (it doesn't help the therapist was asking him about the first fight with Gramme (what you know was the sewers) to see how he responded and the answer was Not Well). As time goes by he's able to gradually increase that until he can get through a full session of discussing traumatic things without you in sight. He's always a little weak afterwards though, but you're there to support him and that means everything to him.
He also gets better at spending time alone and being okay with you being alone. It's not his favorite thing in the world but he no longer destroys property so it's progress
There are a lot of days where he backslides. Especially in the beginning. He can't get out of bed, he can't speak, he can't even let you use the bathroom by yourself because he's that afraid. You do your best to take care of him but it's hard. There's no denying that. And the day after he's always so hard on himself. Frustrated for feeling weak, upset that he worried you, just really overwhelmed.
It's the first time in the last half-a-year that he hasn't been fighting for his life so he just,, sleeps,,, constantly in the beginning. He'll spend all day in bed if you don't wake him up and coax him into taking care of himself. I also think that he doesn't eat a lot for the same reason and you have to gently remind him about that too. And showering. Everything just drains him. And then he gets angry at himself for being so helpless and weak and it all just cycles.
But you're there for it all. And so he just focuses on you. Tells himself that he has to get better for your sake because you've already put up with so much from him that he cant take anything else from you. And eventually he'll understand and truly believe that he genuinely deserves self-love and to feel okay - daresay good - about himself.
Over time it happens less often. He learns to drink a lot of water. Does a bit of exercise (mostly walking in the parks with you and stuff. If you can't walk much then he'll carry you or push you in a wheel chair or whatever you need. He just likes spending time with you so he'll do whatever he can to accommodate you) and eats a vegetable once in a while.
I'm going to assume Sage still has some way to see Tulsi (side note I'm pre-emptively annoyed because I'm assuming the finale (if we ever get it) is gonna have either you stay on Astraea or Sage going with you to Earth because I do not think he could handle losing you to Earth and I also do not think he can or should have to lose Tulsi again because they already didn't talk for five years don't fucking do it again) and when she starts to notice the change in him,, and she's the first one to see it (aside from you but definitely before Sage does),,, she's so happy. She teases him here and there but when he's in the kitchen cooking you guys lunch or something she's crying into your shoulder because she's so proud of him
The first time he notices it is when someone shoves you in public and he's able to keep himself calm enough to carefully remove the both of you without escalating anything and it's like ten minutes later and he's like 'Holy Shit I Didn't Even Threaten That Person Babe Babe Look I Handled Myself :3' and he's so proud and happy for the rest of the day
Sage just,, finally beginning to learn that it's okay to feel safe and loved and vulnerable
Ough I love him so much I just want to punt him directly into a therapists office
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calibudornobudsociety · 5 months
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Cali Donatello Shatter
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Cali Donatello Shatter
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