#funny one-liners

[newbloggycat]

Joke of the day - Dogtoral

I have a dogtorate in baking. http://www.Pinterest.com

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#baking #clean jokes #doctoral #doctorate #funny jokes #funny one-liners #good jokes #humor #jokes #puns #quotes

[daydreamerwonderkid]

More Damian being hilarious moments because his sense of humor speaks to me, pt. 2

pt. 1

#damian wayne #damian al ghul #robin #robin v #ok yes i found dc vs vampires damian very funny #supersons is also a treasure trove #of funny damian moments and one liners #tumblr's limit may be 10 images #but that won't stop me from keep making as many posts as i possibly can #dc comics

[apaethy]

#no context iwtv

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE | S01E02

#interview with the vampire #iwtvedit #iwtv amc #iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #lestat de lioncourt #daniel malloy #tvgifs #tvedit #iwtv spoilers #usertelevision #my gifs #post priesticide TOOK ME OUT #if ep 1 was gothic romance this ep was a dark comedy #honestly the scenes between daniel and louis are honestly very funny #and not just daniel's one liners #louis also has jokes!

[isolophilian]

Leah is putting EVERYTHING into her Annabeth and i love her for it. her little expressions, her demeanor, even her stance. she's playing 4D chess and she's already predicted the outcome. she's lived a 100 years in a 12 year old body. her effortless banter with Percy, her single raised eyebrow. her taking the lead, her vocal intonation implying her knowledge. "game on." "im sorry to hear it." "so we're gonna need a new plan." she was made for this role

#ALSO THE SCENE IN THE GAS STATION (?) WHERE SHE'S BUYING A BUNCH OF CANDY WAS SO FUNNY AND FOR WHAT #HER ONE LINERS ARE SO WELL DELIVERED #HER EXPRESSION WHEN GROVER FLEW AWAY KILLS ME #annabeth chase #leah sava jeffries #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo tv show #pjo tv spoilers #isoceratops

[queenofshilla]

DUMB AND DUMBER (1994) quotes

#Dumb and Dumber #Jim Carrey #Jeff Daniels #giffedbyme #junkfooddaily #cinemapix #dailyflicks #filmedit #filmgifs #This is so funny to me :)) #I think I might start a series with this movie? #There are so many funny one-liners

[thekernblabskys]

Funny One-Liners That Will Get You Laughing

For the biggest laughs from the fewest phrases, take a look at out those funny one-liners. 

1. Did you pay attention they arrested the satan? Yeah, they got him on ownership. 

2. What did one dna say to the alternative dna? “do these genes make me appearance fats?”

3. My iq take a look at outcomes got here lower back. They had been negative. 

4. What do you get while you pass a polar bear with a seal? A polar undergo. Five. Why can’t you accept as true with an atom? Due to the fact they make up literally the whole lot. 

6. Why became six terrified of seven? Because seven eight nine. 

7. What do you call a hippie’s spouse? Mississippi. 

8. What’s the difference among an outlaw and an in-law? Outlaws are wanted. 

9. Scientists have lately found a food that greatly reduces sex pressure. It’s known as wedding ceremony cake. 

10. Before you marry someone, you need to first lead them to use a computer with a slow net connection to peer who they certainly are. 

11. I in no way knew what happiness became until i were given married—after which it changed into too late. 

12. A few men say they don’t wear their wedding band because it cuts off circulate. Properly, that’s the point, isn’t it? 

13. Advice to husbands: strive praising your wife now after which, even though it does startle her before everything. 

14. Did you hear about the shepherd who drove his sheep via town? He was given a price tag for creating a ewe flip. 

15. What happens to an illegally parked frog? It receives toad away. 

16. How does the person in the moon get his hair reduce? Eclipse it. 

17. What do you call a blonde with 1/2 a brain? Proficient. 

18. Why are such a lot of blonde jokes one-liners? So brunettes can take into account them. 

19. Our child has a fantastic deal of self-discipline—and even greater gained’t strength. 

20. Among the things which can be so simple even a infant can operate them are dad and mom.

#Funny One-Liners

[gryffindorxravenclaw]

Best Man Speech One-Liners in Favor of the Bride

A witty one-liner will assist the first-rate guy set the celebratory temper for any wedding ceremony. But, most one-liners tend to make the bride a bit apprehensive and on occasion, if carried too a ways, make her displeased. Right here are some humorous one liners certain to please the bride but now not in the least, to offend the groom.

1. The exceptional way to get most husbands to do some thing is to suggest that possibly they may be too old to do it.

2. A husband is case in point that a spouse can take a joke.

3. An ideal spouse is one who facilitates the husband with the dishes.

4. How do you hold your husband from reading your email? Rename the mail folder to “practise manuals”

5. What number of men does it take to put the toilet seat down? Nobody is aware of. It’s by no means happened.

6. What must you provide a person who has everything? A female to reveal him a way to paintings it.

7. Why do girls pay extra attention to their appearance than enhancing their brains? Because most guys are silly, but few are blind.

8. A bride is - a girl with a fine prospect of happiness in the back of her.

9. A spouse is - a person who will stand by using you through all the hassle you would not have had if you’d stayed unmarried inside the first area.

10. Each girl ought to marry. In any case, happiness isn’t the entirety in life!

Permit the bride take center level and feel satisfied on the most special day of her lifestyles.

Encompass those one-liners and modify them with real names and conditions to make your speech greater exciting.

#funny One-Liners

[delta-nu]

Funny One-liners Which Are Positive To Raise Your Spirits

Nothing gets a terrific giggle higher than a properly-positioned one-liner—and we could all use a little laughter throughout attempting instances. Enter those humorous one-liners. Those clever jokes will carry your spirits, brighten your temper and get you giggling right away.

From witty one-liners that require some humor to true one-liners to percentage with children, those hilarious jokes will make any verbal exchange greater active. So whether you experience texting humorous one-liners in your quality pal or can’t wait to check these out in public, here are the one zero one satisfactory one-liners.

Funny One-Liners

1. My spouse instructed me to forestall impersonating a flamingo. I needed to placed my foot down.

2. I went to shop for a few camo pants however couldn’t locate any.

3. I failed math so frequently at school, i’m able to’t even count.

4. I used to have a take care of on existence, but then it broke.

5. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting larger and bigger, however then it hit me.

6. I heard there were a bunch of wreck-ins over at the car park. That is incorrect on so many degrees.

7. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather… not screaming and yelling just like the passengers in his automobile.

8. When life offers you melons, you might be dyslexic. Nine. Don’t you hate it whilst someone answers their personal questions? I do.

10. It takes plenty of balls to golf the manner I do.

11. I advised him to be himself; that became pretty mean, i bet.

12. I understand they are saying that money talks, but all mine says is ‘good-bye.’

13. My father has schizophrenia, however he’s appropriate human beings.

14. The trouble with kleptomaniacs is that they usually take matters actually.

15. I’m able to’t consider i were given fired from the calendar manufacturing facility. All i did become take a time off.

16. The general public are greatly surprised once they find out how awful i’m as an electrician.

17. In no way agree with atoms; they make up the whole thing.

18. My wife just found out i replaced our bed with a trampoline. She hit the ceiling!

19. I was hooked on the hokey pokey, however then i turned myself round.

20. I used to assume i used to be indecisive. But now i’m now not so sure.

#Funny One-liners

[laz-kay]

"Is everyone else's bed the size of our kitchen?" "What? No. These beds are small. Did you say yours is big?" "Uhh no! Goodnight!"

Bob's Burgers, The Nightmare 2 Days Before Christmas (S14: E10)

#tina's one liners in this episode got me good #she's so unintentionally funny #also the kid's nicknames are so freaking cute i love this family sm #it's no plight before christmas #but this was heartwarming af i loved it #the nightmare 2 days before christmas #bobs burgers #bobs burgers spoilers #bobs burgers gif #bobs burgers season 14 #linda belcher #bob belcher #tina belcher #gene belcher #louise belcher

[useragarfield]

#one tree hill 4.15 is a comedy actually

#othedit #userlix #useryusi #usercallie #userelliee #tusercarolina #tuseranna #tusermichi #tusersandra #tuserandrea #useroli #userjulianna #tuserchar #cinematv #oth #tuserannabelle #tv #myedit #one tree hill #this is a joke because some dark shit happens obvi #with the br*yton fight and the end with psycho derek #but the one liners were so funny and i didn't even get all of them

[newbloggycat]

Joke of the day - Pothole

Damn! Stucked in the pothole again. But I shell overcome! http://www.newbloggycat.com

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#clean jokes #funny jokes #funny one-liners #good jokes #humor #jokes #pothole #puns #short jokes #tortoise

[all-i-do-is-live-in-daydreams]

Three of my favorite moments of Infinite Darkness

of course leon would call a bazooka sexy

"Sooo..." Leon, if I was her I would have dropped that "young man" for you so fast.

And this scene where a swarm of mutated infected rats are charging Leon and the first thing he does before defending himself or even running is just stopping and saying, "Wish I had some cheese."

#leon kennedy you are the loml #he's so funny #he needs his silly one liners back #GIVE LEON HIS SASSINESS BACK #leon scott kennedy #leon resident evil #resident evil leon #re4 leon #re2 leon #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy #leon re4r #re2r leon #re2 remake #re4 remake #resident evil infinite darkness #infinite darkness #the last 2 screenshots are so bad but i hadn't taken any while watching #i took some quick ones from a youtube video

[ask-funnybunnydoll]

So…who’s the most horny?

P: I can't believe you both looked at me

J: It's kind of obvious, clown

R: (insert funny one liner here)

#J: you cant just say insert funny one liner here and think thats humorous. #R: Shhhh... #amazing digital circus #bunnydoll #funnybunny #funnybunnydoll #jax x pomni #jax x pomni x ragatha #jax x ragatha #pomni x ragatha #tadc fanart #tadc ragatha #tadc jax #tadc pomni #tadc #art #fanart #ask #ask blog

[captsharonstark]

Negan's Sass in The Walking Dead (1/??)

#the walking dead #negan #jeffrey dean morgan #negan smith #neganedit #jdmedit #rick grimes #maggie greene #he is so funny #i had to do this series i couldn't resist #his one liners are my favorite and there are so many #twd #my stuff #my gifs

[every-kakashi]

#hatake kakashi #kakashi hatake #manga screencap #ch.012 #& zabuza #another thing they love doing is saying each others cool one liners. #its really funny to me.

[rebo-chan]

Sorry y'all this one's gonna be a long one lol fun analysis/theorizing/headcanoning whatever the fuck this is under the cut :)

So, lately I've been really thinking about Lambo and Tsuna's relationship, Lambo's connection to Vongola, and Lambo's spot as the Lightning Guardian. I know as a fandom, we tend to disregard Lambo because he has like.. two fights in the whole series or wish that someone else was made the Lightning Guardian because that boy is Literally Five. And I won't act like it wouldn't have been cool to see another character as Lightning Guardian (My Haru Guardian fans rise up where are you) but I think what Amanos done here is really fun too from an analysis perspective.

To start with, Tsuna's family is not really a..traditional Mafia family or even a traditional Vongola family either. Let's look at this here, he's got his Two Best Friends(TM), his crush's big brother, the leader of the Disciplinary Committee at his school, a criminal, a half dead girl, and the aforementioned five year old as his guardians. This is FAR from what's likely expected out of the Vongola family, even when you date it back to Primo AT LEAST PRIMO HAD PRINCES, PRIESTS, SAMURAIS as his guardians. (Though he gets away with having One Best Friend (TM) as his guardian.) Yet somehow, their family makes it work!! They survive the Mafia world, multiple times throughout the series and when it's not working they get stronger as a unit and they fight for each other and make it out together. And I think that's the beauty of their specific family.

So then you have Lambo, who Tsuna would do anything for just to avoid Lambo having to experience a fraction of the shit they go through. And Tsuna actually SUCCEEDS at this, he doesn't normally succeed when it comes to being avoidant of Mafia stuff but this was something throughout the series that he was so genuinely adamant against. He only let Lambo fight when he truly had to and even then he very minimally let the Mafia world wrap its greedy paws around Lambo. Kokuyo arc, Tsuna didn't even sort of kind of a little bit consider taking Lambo with them (which would later help keep Kyoko and Haru safe), Varia arc, knowing that this would disqualify him, Tsuna decided he could not allow Lambo to keep fighting.

Future Arc, Tsuna kept Lambo out of the fight as much as he could, allowing the non-fighters to take care of him and I-pin. Shimon Arc, Tsuna felt real regret at the prospect that he allowed Lambo to come.

(And Arco arc where Lambo was hardly present at either, which I'd like to imagine that if Lambo was involved in Arco arc then Tsuna may have just absolutely fucking died)

Tsuna to Lambo is not his guardian (Frankly, he doesn't view any of his guardians as such, they are his friends, his pride, his comrades, and those he has traded blows with and knows they can be trusted.) Lambo to Tsuna is his little brother. This five year old was sent on an assassination attempt that was absolutely in no circumstance meant to actually succeed and the Bovinos know that. To send Lambo to assassinate the strongest hitman was a death mission. So, Tsuna took this child in (or rather this child stuck around bc his Mom makes banger meals) and immediately Tsuna assumes the role of his brother. Lambo and Tsuna are the closest out of all the kids. (Ofc Tsuna loves I-pin and fuuta too, but I think it's safe to say Lambo is his dumb little brother)

Now, I don't think that Tsuna is ever going to see Lambo as anything but his little brother. I actually theorize that the way TYL Lambo is the way he is because Tsuna never really got out of the habit of babying him. He's calmed down since he was a kid and developed a more nonchalant personality with the occasional tantrum because you can't tell me Tsuna DOESNT STILL view TYL Lambo as a non-combatant. When Tsunas 15, he looks at 5 year old Lambo and goes no thanks that boy is never touching a weapon in his life. When Tsunas is 25, he sees 15 year Lambo and goes that is STILL a child he is never touching a weapon in his life. And yes he's completely unaware of the hypocrisy in my head.

This is a spoiled little brother no one can tell me otherwise.

So we know Tsuna just sees him as his kid brother and not a real guardian. But then you have Lambo's feelings about the whole matter. We know that Lambo doesn't really consider Tsuna a boss but as his big brother, but I don't think that changes a lot for Lambo. While fighting is scary for Lambo, he still desires to follow alongside Tsuna and his friends. He doesn't want to be left behind and makes Tsuna promise him he'll take him wherever he goes. He sees Tsuna freaking out about him being a child in a battlefield and he goes, "No you don't understand, I want to be there."

And that? That right there is what fucks me up after everything. Lambo as a concept for a Lightning Guardian feels really unique because of this. He's the youngest one. He's always going to chase after the others, trying to keep up with them, to walk alongside them. One day, he wants to catch up and be considered a rightful Guardian like the others. And that is so... Tsuna and him would be batting heads over this because I cannot see Tsuna relenting on Lambo staying out of the battle. I cannot see Tsuna ever feeling like Lambo's ready. Not because he thinks Lambo is weak, but because Lambo's his baby brother and Tsuna needs him more away from the battle or else he can't focus.

While Tsuna doesn't react outwardly in this frame, I do think it's not a coincidence that he could focus on fighting the battle and not be "impatient" as Reborn put it, the moment he saw Gokudera and Hibari on the battlefield. He could focus easier knowing his friends were running around saving Lambo and co.

Okay, so you have the Big brother who wants to protect his little brother from seeing the same stuff he does, from fighting the same battles he does, and wants him to grow up as a regular kid (a right which he had been robbed off the moment a certain hitman showed up at his door). Then you have the little brother who wants wholeheartedly to be there, desires to catch up to his big brother and know the world that his big brother knows.

How does this difference in value get addressed? well it doesn't because Lambo is still 5 and Shounen jump are cowards for ending Amanos series when they did <3 B U T we have this.

We all know this scene for when we rewatched Reborn for the first and went "..wait.." because that was some actually sweet foreshadowing from Amano. Okay, so. We have a Lambo who finally did it. Finally is someone worthy of being called the Vongola Lightning Guardian. And Tsuna and co are implied to have just been... Gone. All of Tsuna's efforts to raise this kid in a regular life are ripped away because something happens to HIM, not Lambo. And from Lambo's perspective, he's caught up finally but the person he was following isn't around anymore. He didn't think he'd see him again. I think it's safe to assume that this scene either implies that something happens to Tsuna in his 30s (since we know he wasn't actually dead TYL) OR 20yl Lambo is from a parallel world where Byakuran had actually won and actually took Tsunas life.

And I think that's some real meat to bite into for these characters. A little brother who will lose his big brother if he doesn't do something, get stronger in time. A big brother who won't let him join the battle because he's afraid of losing HIS little brother. A Vongola Lightning Guardian who wants to be a shield for his Boss, and a Boss won't let him be a shield.

And that? That's a good concept for a Vongola Lightning Guardian.

Thank you for reading this far if you did :] this is a bit of a ramble but I was thinking about it and I felt it nice to share. I hope maybe I shared some of my brain worms with you <3

#katekyo hitman reborn #khr #sawada tsunayoshi #lambo bovino #ough this was a long one #why cant i make regular haha funny one liners #whys everything gotta be a thesis paper i s2g