#gassy dragons

[grossgeck]

That one “knight saves the princess from the giant dragon” trope except the knight won’t stop fubking FARTING

#eproctophilia #gassy #farting #eprocto #gross ramblings from a geck #and the dragon can fart too #as a treat 👁👁

[stinkfacestories]

The Bear and the Bull

I didn't think anyone would take Iron Bull's place in my fantasies, and while he has not been dethroned, I have been having some wonderful ideas about Daddy Bear Halsin from Baldur's Gate III. Not only do I bet he smells like a beast, He no doubt is the gassy dad of the camp

#Iron Bull #Halsin #Dragon Age #baldur's gate 3 #stinkface #big gassy guys #gassy hunks #face farting #farting

[gothgator]

And here's the gassy/fart alt of the last one.

#fatfur #fat furry #fat fur #furry #weight gain #bhm #ssbhm #fat blob #gothgator #eastern dragon #fart #slob #gassy

[dragonsjuicebox]

cringe is freedom

#i know its 4 am dont ask about it #i ate a lot of garlic #regrets? no #gassy? yes #thinking of: dragons

[ironclark]

To see even more Keyblades, check out @KeybladeForge and the discord! https://discord.gg/JV6NFtTA4c

SWAMP GAS -

A Keyblade modeled after the world of DreamWork's Shrek! This keyblade makes your Fire spells a higher tear! The handle and hilt of the Keyblade is designed after Shrek's swamp home, with it's green aesthetic. The shaft of the blade is designed after Fiona's tower where she was held, with the very top having the top of Duloc's castle. The teeth of the blade is formed by Dragon. The token is the iconic Shrek "S".

The World Logo is designed after Shrek's home, his favorite place in the world. The name comes from the plot centering around Shrek's swamp, as well as his gassy nature. 

QUANTONIUM-

This Keyblade is designed after the sci-fi nature of DreamWorks' Monsters vs Aliens. This keyblade is designed to increase the damage of combo finishers! The hilt guard of this blade is designed after the containment cells of the government facility housing the monsters. The shaft and teeth of the Keyblade is designed after the meteor contianing the Quantonium flying through space, with a bit of the comet tail forming Insectosaurous' wing. The keychain is designed after BOB, with the token being Insectosaurous. 

The World Logo is that of Susan's home town of Modesto. The name comes from the energy that provides Susan her giant form. 

FURY OF THE NIGHT-

A Keyblade designed after the viking style of DreamWorks' How to Train Your Dragon. This Keyblade is designed to give protection against any lightning and fire attacks. The entire Keyblade is inspired by a Vikings' ship with Toothless designs. The top of the Keyblade has the helmet given to Hiccup from his father. The teeth of the Keyblade is designed after Toothless' tail fin. The token is the symbol of that of the Vikings of Berk. 

The World logo is the central isles of Berk. The name comes from Toothless' species name: Nightfury. 

COLD CENTER-

A simple keyblade designed afte the dreams and iciness of DreamWorks' Rise of the Guardians. This keyblade is designed to have high blizzard damage. The shaft and handle of the Keyblade is designed after Jack Frost's staff. The hilt and keychain is designed after Sandman's magical sand. The teeth of the blade is designed after Jack's ice abilities. The token is that of Baby Tooth. 

The world logo is that of Burgess, where Jack Frost is from. The name comes from North urging Jack to find his center, as well as Jack being a spirit of Winter. 

PANDA WARRIOR-

A Keyblade designed after the Jade Palace of DreamWorks' Kung Fu Panda. This keyblade is designed to have high combos and greater effects from food. The hiltguard of the blade is designed after the Jade Palace, with the handle being inspired by Oogway's staff. The shaft of the blade is designed to have the Furious Five designs through it. The teeth is a stylized version of a panda fist. The token is that of a dumpling, Po's motivation. 

The World Logo is that of where the Furious Five train and call home. The name is a combination of Dragon Warrior and Po being a Panda.

BLACK MAMBA-

A Keyblade designed after the mechanical mind of DreamWorks' Megamind! This keyblade is designed to have high thunder damage. The bottom half of the hilt and teeth of the blade is designed after Megamind's Brainbots, his self-made minions. The top half of the hilt is designed after Megamind's Black Mamba's suit. The shaft is designed after the robot suit of the Black Mamba. The token is that of Megamind's logo.

The World Logo is that of Metro City (or Metrocity), the central city of the movie. The name comes from the special suit that Minion had designed. 

#Kingdom Hearts #Keyblades #Crossovers #Shrek #Monsters vs Aliens #HTTYD #Rise of the Guardians #Kung Fu Panda #Megamind

[lesbianoms]

Thinking about a princess with a bellyful of dragon ❤️🐉

This specific dragon is a bit smaller than dragons are normally thought to be— about the size of a fox or a big dog— but she’s managed to swallow it whole and and keep it curled up in her tummy.

Imagine how round and full her stomach would be. So swollen— almost like she’s swallowed a beach ball— as it gurgles and squirms around while her meal waits to settle. Imprints of scaly claws are seen from the inside as the dragon tries to push its way out. But there’s no escape from the princess’s hungry belly, it seems~

Little clicks and growls can be heard from the beast within, muffled by her active gut. Her royal feast shifting around, trying to get comfortable in its new slimy cave, which of course causes the princess to react. Little gasps at the flutters from within that orb, poking out on her middle.

Digestion takes about a week or two, I imagine. The princess burps as her powerful gut works away on the dragon, as the sounds from within get lower… bubblier… her burps begin to startle the royal court. They sound something fierce, especially coming from such a dainty girl like herself. Each deep belch siphons more of her prey’s energy in one powerful, gassy roar.

As the days go by, her belly loses its tighter shape, becoming all doughy and soft… whining as it further processes her meal. She hiccups and pats her gut, hands slapping against its squish and giving slightly as she lets loose another belch. The princess tastes fire on her lips, sighs, and leans back onto her bed with an audible SLORSH from her belly as she gets ready to sleep off her big meal.

That’s certainly one way to slay a dragon~

#v.ore #v0re #soft vore #vore talk #nom’s thoughts #vore scenario #vore writing #fatal vore #female pred #digestion #dragon vore #monster prey #vore kink #minors dni #got really into detail with the belly here #I love it when pred tummies get super soft!

[thevideogameartarchive]

Gassy Dragon 'Dragon Quest III' Famicom

#Dragon Quest III #Famicom

[winniemaywebber]

It's Been A Long, Long Time

(sage said "imagine this guy meeting his baby son for the first time and I couldn't get it out of my head)

(@sagesolsticewrites @liebgottsjumpwings @trashbag-baby666 @ginabaker1666 @precious-little-scoundrel)

You survey yourself in the mirror for what feels like the one thousandth time, nerves bubbling up from your stomach and reaching your throat, threatening to spill out like fire from a dragon's mouth. You smooth your dress with your hands, a soft rose pink color that compliments your dark hair perfectly. You smile at yourself, the memory of trying it on in front of your husband comes back to you, when he was home on leave all those months ago, and the way his soft brown eyes had lit up the second he'd seen you in it.

“Oh, darling,” he had murmured in your ear as he held you close. “I think this is my new favorite,” his pretty hands suddenly all over your body and his lips upon yours, the touch you'd been craving for years.

You come back to yourself, your knees weak at the memory of that wonderful time, finding your hand clutched to your chest to slow your heartbeat. Tiptoeing quietly about the bedroom, you make it to your dressing table, adding a silver necklace and bracelet set that Harry had gifted you on your wedding day - you'd given him a pair of cufflinks, your initials engraved upon them, him smiling sweetly at you as he'd opened the black box in which they were wrapped. Grinning, you stab an earring into your ear, dropping the back of it as you attempt to move your hair out the way.

“Oh, bother,” you whisper, bending down to retrieve it from where it has dramatically rolled underneath the table. You bend with all your might to grab it, scrambling on the long pile carpet, when suddenly you lose balance, grabbing on to the table to try save yourself. The table slams against the wall, and you brace yourself, lips clamped together, silently hoping that the baby could sleep through it.

A loud, long cry from across the room makes it obvious that the sudden sound was too much, and your son in the crib next to your bed is wailing so hard that his little face is turning beetroot red. You pick him up and attempt to soothe him back to sleep. “Shhh, little man. It's okay,” you coo, kissing his warm face and wiping his tears away. “I'm so sorry. Mama is just a clutz!” You laugh, an attempt to diffuse the tension that's crawling through your body. Seeing the signs that your baby may be gassy, you carefully hold him upright, his body on your chest and his head over your shoulder.

“Come on, sweetheart. Let's get this burp out.” You pat his back 1-2-3, 1-2-3, maintaining a steady rhythm, all while bobbing up and down. A large burp ripples through your infant, shocking him so much that his sweet little head bobs back a little. As if in slow motion, you hear another airy burp leave him - followed by a stream of warm spit up dripping down your shoulder and ruining your dress. You hold the baby out at arms length, inspecting his clothes. He's clean, of course he is. It's just you, the pink material of your dress now spattered with white mottled liquid.

“Darn it!” you whimper, placing the now much happier baby back in his crib, his eyes heavy again from all the excitement. “Little guy,” you say mostly to yourself. “You know this is papa's favorite. Couldn't you have saved all that for the hideous yellow one I wear to church?” You giggle as you catch sight of it, the yellow so bright that it makes you slightly nauseous, not just the smell of your current self causing your nose to wrinkle. With a sigh, you pull off the pretty pink material and unceremoniously try and throw it in the laundry basket. You miss. Of course you do.

Pulling a cornflower blue number over your head and hoping your son keeps the milk to himself this time, you eventually get back to pushing your delicate diamond earrings through your earlobes, taking a deep breath and basking in the success that your outfit is finally complete. Adjusting to being a new mom is hard by itself, but going through the whole experience alone with just letters from your husband was excruciating. The morning sickness with nobody to soothe you and hold you, nobody to place a cool washcloth on your head after you'd been hugging the cold porcelain, your knees red raw and bruised from kneeling over the bowl for what felt like hours. No strong hands being able to rub your tummy, placing one there gently to feel his baby kick. You'd imagined it, though, his doe eyes wide as saucers as he'd stifle his emotion, trying to stop the tears. “Wow,” he'd say, looking at you in amazement. “This is incredible.” You think he'd kiss your growing bump, then kiss you, before placing his head on your chest, his hand remaining on your stomach. The thought of all this lost time is enough for a sob to catch in your throat and cause hot tears to stream down your face. Wiping them away as fast as they come so as not to ruin your makeup, you try and get it together and catch a glimpse at the clock on the wall: 11am.

You run downstairs, hoping for just a few minutes of peace before the baby inevitably wakes up to eat and have a clean diaper again. You want to sit down with a book, but you can't seem to focus, the words all blending together on the page and making your head swim. Trying to shake the nerves, you begin to pace your living room, taking deep breaths every time you reach each end of the room.

You don't know how long you stay like that, basically catatonic as you go back and forth. Feeling like it could be hours, you jump when you hear a loud rap at the door. Rushing toward it, trying your best to smooth every wrinkle from your outfit, you try and compose yourself before opening the door to see your husband for the first time in almost a year. He's in his uniform, the hat slightly bent out of shape at the top. He looks extremely handsome, his pretty mouth spread in a grin at the sight of you. You run towards him, leaping into his arms and wrapping your arms around his neck. His arms wrap around your back, pulling you in as close as he possibly can.

“Darling,” he whispers in your ear. You feel his whole body relax under your hands as you hold him, your hands going up to stroke the back of his neck, your face buried in him to breathe in his delicious scent that you'd missed so terribly. “You look–wow, Jean. So so beautiful,” his eyes softening when he takes you in, just like you knew they would. He leans forward and plants a soft kiss on your lips, his hand cupping your cheek.

“Hi, honey,” you say, as you wipe your tears. “Welcome home. There's someone upstairs you should meet.” The realization dawns on him, and his mouth drops open, nervous. You take his hand and pull him inside, smiling at him all the while. He pauses, gripping your hand a little tighter.

“W-wait, Jean,” he stutters, his eyes downcast and his teeth clamped nervously to his bottom lip. He breathes out, his shoulders sagging slightly. “What if…what if he doesn't like me?”

“Oh, my darling. Don't think like that. He loves you already.” You walk back toward your husband, wrapping him in your arms. “I've shared so many stories with him already, Bing. How we met, how wonderful you always are. Where you've been all this time. The fun times you shared with his Uncle Bubbles…and the newer good times with Uncle Rosie, too,” you pause, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, your hand remaining on his cheek. “And, every time I tell him a story about his Papa, he listens so intently. His eyes are as sweet and pretty as yours, my love, and I see how focused he is on me when I talk of you. He coos whenever anyone says his Papa's name. He looks just like you, Harry.” You pause, surveying the emotion etched on his face. “Please, come and meet your son. He's been kept waiting long enough, darling.” You both giggle at one another, him leaning over and kissing you gently on the cheek.

You lead him from the hallway to the bedroom, the baby cooing, for once wide awake and not crying. You feel your husband take a deep breath, the exhale quivering as he catches sight of the tiny bundle in the crib next to your side of the bed. He walks towards him, instantly scooping him up into his arms.

“Hi, buddy,” he whispers, his lips clamped together to try and stop the tears from pouring out of him. He is, however, unsuccessful, a sob escaping from his mouth as he takes in every feature of his son. “He's so small, honey,” he whimpers, looking between the two of you. You walk over to join them, relieved that your family is now finally together. You hold your husband as he keeps looking at the baby, trying to memorize every part of him. His hand reaches out and strokes the baby's face, the little guy relaxing under his father's touch instantly and his eyes closing, the baby falling asleep without needing extra help for the first time ever.

“Wow,” you blink in amazement. “That usually takes me about an hour. You're magical, my love.” He smiles, planting a kiss on your forehead.

“I'm so happy to be home, Jean. So darn happy to be with you, and our son. Now, let me change and I'll make sure you get some rest. You've been doing this all alone, honey. It's my turn now.”

Soon enough, you're all in your most comfortable clothes and laying on the bed together. Harry had only put the baby down for a moment to change, before scooping him back up in his strong arms, once again cooing at him, already telling him stories of B-17s, airsickness and England. You lay on your pillow, watching your husband with his son and savoring the beautiful moment. You drift off to the sound of his voice, the comfort you've craved for months.

“Wow, buddy,” he exhales, his words shaking slightly. “We sure do have a lot to catch up on! But first, let me start with telling you about your uncle, Bubbles Payne…”

#masters of the air #mota #masters of the air fic #harry crosby #harry crosby fic #croz and jean

[chaotic-minds-think-alike]

“ok so dragon lizards probably going to be renamed to something else because there will be 2 types

these guys are the failure dudes and Eight kinda was just "bye" and dumped them into the world (also Eight wants to make his own ecosystem but mf this is not how you do that!!!)

they were made as apart of the maintenance roster but he screwed up somewhere and they were too dumb to follow orders and started destroying where they were deployed aoaoughg

he does NOT like them but think its funny to fuck around with them because of how stupid they are

so now they kinda just roam around in the wild

ok so now their abilities

they're probably blue liz size because they were meant to "fly" but cant for obvious reasons and actually glide (and leap far) instead

they're also slow like greens and can climb poles because their wicked claws but aren't that active and prefer to stay on high vantage points

now for the metal bits on their head is a kind of regulator because in the experimental phase mfs would choke on their own excessive exhaust and die so this stuff is just a filter (and so exhaust shoots out the back of their head like a vulture's)

they still can breathe normally and so if too many are in a small area breathing fire they'll stun eachother (losers)

also yeah they're just really loserish gassy guys and so they breathe fire by creating a spark which means every time they open their jaws their specialized teeth ignite the excess gas

also as you might be able to expect they're not that good at firebreathing and can only do so in short bursts”

(Me info dumping just copy and pasted)

#myart #concept #design #rainworld #rainworld iterator #iterator #rain world lizard #lizard #rainworldbuilding

[slashingdisneypasta]

OK EVER SINCE YOU ANSWERED THE SAD SMARTY-POP EXCERPT, I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT DRAGON!TOON PATROL (and princess Poppy *cough*). Now that asks are open, I need to vent these thoughts.

I'm not entirely sure how they'd work in this AU. But all five of these dragons somehow found each other, and have decided its best to stay together. I can't decide if they hang around an abandoned, dilapidated castle or they've got a big cave in the mountains (maybe they could be the reason the castle was abandoned? 👀)

Smartass is the smallest dragon, but that only gives him more incentive to be as tough and viscious possible. It's how he can be the leader of these insane overgrown lizards.

Greasy is a sort of secondary leader, when for whatever reason Smartass isn't available to keep everyone in check. And even has been the mastermind behind some of their raids. One thing is for certain though; His tastes in the fairer sex go beyond scales (ladies? 👀)

Wheezy is the silent, scary one of the group with the best fire breather of them all. Dirty, kind of torn up, and smoke billowing from his mouth all times, this dragon's favorite places to terrorize/raid are tobacco farms (no cigarettes, but he can chew the stuff)

Psycho is the one who gets the most kicks out of striking fear in humans the most. While the others may be busy finding whatever goods that interest them in a village, Psycho can easily be found chasing the villagers.

Stupid, although the strongest and biggest, is the most easily swayed dragon out of them all. You could offer this big lug food, and he'll gladly take the bribe.

To keep with the gang theme, maybe these guys keep a few villages in line? If the people give them what they want, they'll be mostly left alone. (I'm not quite sure. I haven't though of much lore behind this AU 😅)

I'm not sure how Doom could come into play here. Maybe he could be a corrupt king that pays them to do his dirty work like in the Fairytale AU?

I don't have tid-bits for all the dragon boys, but here's one for Wheezy. I imagine that he can do some pretty neat tricks with his fire. Like blowing out certain shapes, or knowing how to control it where it won't burn you, but just leave a very hot tickle. Imagine him showing them off to you 👀

Alright, I wasn't sure if I should have included Poppy in this, but I feel obligated to share my thoughts XD Poppy is a princess who got married off to a prince who treats her coldly (Ben). When the dragons attacked her home, by some circumstance or another, she got taken (I'm not quite sure how yet. Maybe she was trying to be diplomatic and it all went wrong. Maybe it was Smartass just being cruel to the royals. Or maybe it was Greasy's idea because- you know why 🙄 or Psycho felt enamored with her). Either this can go in a classic Beauty and the Beast style, or a angsty/darker route.

Anyways, those are my thoughts! I hope dragon weasels bring you as much joy as they've been bringing me lately XD

DRAGONS!!

Sorry for the late reply, I am finished with Placement but I still have assignments to finish and get before... well, the end of today 😅 Its okay though, I only have 2 left. I am very very excited to hear about dragons!!

First of all- YES to the idea of them causing a castle to be abandoned!! I can only imagine the chaos, but its glorious. These 5 terrifying, mean dragons deciding this place is their new place, and they have some fun with the humans there for a while (By which i mean Psycho and Greasy had fun with them... ) ... but when they escaped, that was fine, now they have the place to themselves! XD

Ahhhh! I love them!! || Smartass being kind of feral?? Like, I bet he's bigger then a human but he's smaller then the other dragons so he's so vicious-- that would be terrifying. I love that! || Greasy... Greasy lemme just quickly remind you I am a Certified monster fucker- || WHEEZY! Okay he is definitely my favourite. I'm imagining gassy, fumy smoke just slipping and rolling uncontrollably outta the corners of his mouth at all times, so he looks monstrous and gross. And just, the fact that you mentioned he'll chew the tobacco!! (Cowboy!!) and also the tricks! XD Yesssss, that's so cool XDD || OF COURSE you are the gremlin dragon, Psycho, of course XD I love this, its so perfect for him. I kindof imagine him to be a more lithe, lizard-like dragon. Creepy to be around, freaky to look at. Genuinely makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up. || Awwww Stupid!! He is my next favourite after Wheezy XDD I wanna feed him so bad!! I wanna make him my huge terrifying dragon friend XD I will take a leaf out of Mrs Bickermans book XD Not Sadie's... though- maybe if I could get Ben- XD

And yes!! Always include Poppy! When in doubt, include her ^^ You knowwww she's canon to me XD And ahhhh! I love all those ideas, I honestly dunno which I like more <3

#thank you for sending these!!

[multiversal-pig-outing]

one piece idea. Robin is captured gets turn into a fat and gassy celestial dragon.

[pjplayground]

Tragic Mystery

There's a familial mystery afoot, I can smell it.

Bio: Paperjam is an aspiring thespian in their prime. They spend most of their free time working on stuff for their school's current play. They accentuate this eccentric interest with an eccentric wardrobe to match. Recently, his family moved into an old mansion that's apparently been in the family for generations, and his life is about to get dramatic - how fitting for a theater kid.

Basic Info Full Name: Paperjam Bonrad McFadden Age: 17 Height: 6' Gender Identity: Genderfluid (he/they preferred) Sexual Orientation: Pansexual (preference for masculine people) Medical Issues: Anxiety, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (PoTS) Can't Leave the House Without: Gum, jacket, beanie, salt shaker key chain, phone, earbuds

Relationships Ink - Father, fairly good Irene - Mother, have conflicting views Undyne - Friend, teases him on the daily Alphys - Friend, they info dump together Burgerpants - Friend, background set buddies Napstablook - New friend, totally does not have a huge crush on them

Miscellaneous Little Facts - The little pins on his hat are little references taken from various spooky/horror movies, can you identity them all? - His favorite flavor of gum to chew is honeydew. - PJ LIVES for salt and vinegar flavored things - especially chips. - They wear a large, old t-shirt for pajamas, and nothing else besides boxers. - When he was a kid, he would take the wax out of candles and mold them into little wax sculptures. He was a weird kid. - The story of Tragic Mystery was inspired by a horror movie called "The Ritual", as well as shows like Gravity Falls as said by Crispy Koala. - PJ's anxiety gives him what he calls an "anxious tummy", making him extremely gassy and his bowels very irritable. Meaning it's not uncommon for him to fart when he's anxious or nervous. - They refuse to eat at any restaurant that doesn't serve some form of chicken tenders and french fries. As they should, honestly. - He has three little pet Cotton Puff Bats named Lock, Shock, and Barrel. - Lock, Shock, and Barrel are fed all sorts of treats by PJ, their favorite being white dragon fruit. - PJ has a mini salt shaker key chain that he carries around on his backpack or belt loop for food emergencies, because he loves salty stuff. - In his closet, he has a pile of old busted up notebooks filled with years of stage play ideas. - He likes listening to music that fits within the umbrella aesthetics of Liminal Spaces and Weird/Dreamcore. - On top of the pins on his hat, he also has a variety of pins that he's collected which he adorns all over his backpack. - PJ plays on an old gaming system - the Cloud Jumper 94 - that his father used to own. He has newer gaming systems but he prefers to play on the old console. - He had a really, really embarrassing goth phase when he was between the ages of 13 and 15. - Due to the severity of his condition on some off days, PJ is a part time wheelchair user. - His mother Irene is a lawyer who believes PJ should work towards a more "sustainable" career. You can imagine how well they get along. - PJ loves horror movies, and doesn't scare easily. - The reason PJ always has gum in his possession is because he concentrates better when doing a minor motor action. - PJ and his friends were all dubbed the weird kids by their peers, so they stuck together. - PJ tries to keep a very collected and aloof demeanor around his friends and everyone else, but that all gets thrown out the window when Napstablook is within ten feet of his sight. - He's very passionate about all forms of art, including painting. But theater is his specialty within the arts. - From PJ's point of view, Blook seems oblivious to his crush on him. Which may or may not be the case... - He stumbled upon his family's potentially dark history by accident while snooping around the new house.

Tragic Mystery was a story created by my friend @thecrispykoala, and may have more content dedicated to it in the near future.

#studentsechoes #reference sheet #tragic mystery #tm pj

[kattythingz]

Just For You

(Inspired by an ask which I instigated, and written for the following peeps whose excitement guided me through the process: @datdangernoodle @evilwriter37 @autumndragon. I hope it was worth the year-long wait for y’all ;w;)

Summary: a what-if story told through 4 (5?) varying perspectives of people who love Hiccup Haddock, +1 of the person learning to love Hiccup Haddock.

959 / 7475

The Thorston Sheep Rocketing Games were no fun when the mind was already preoccupied. Ruffnut had spent the entire day demolishing Tuffnut with her dragon’s magnificently explosive firepower, sending sheep flailing at heights her muttonhead brother couldn’t even dream of achieving with his dragon, but eventually, it just became too freaking much even for her to handle.

“Hey, what do you think’s got Hiccup’s leg twisted today?” she asked after Tuffnut predictably missed and sent the sheep straight onto hard, unforgiving rock.

“Oh, sure, soften the horrible blow of defeat, why don’t ya?” Tuffnut griped. “It’s not like you’re trying to distract me or anything, you horrible, cheating woman.” He shot her a single-eyed glare, which still did nothing to intimidate her, no matter what lies his dented little skull kept telling him. “Yeah, that’s right. I know what you’re doing. I saw you feeding Barf those fishes that make him all gassy the other day! Don’t think I haven’t noticed your scheming ways.”

Ruffnut rolled her eyes. “Okay, first of all, you don’t have any evidence to prove that; you’re just mad ‘cause you’re the big stinking yak again. And second—”

She yanked the retrieved sheep from his arms, tossing it over her shoulder.

“—this is serious,” she finished. “As in, I think there’s something seriously wrong with Hiccup. You saw him when he got back from that ship; don’t you think he was being a little too honest about the whole thing?”

Tuffnut frowned, those rusty gears-for-brains abruptly tuning to Ruffnut’s. “Now that you mention it, he was being weirdly TMI.” He rubbed his chin in thought. “Maybe the shock of seeing thirteen corpses killed by the Scourge was just too much for his brilliant little brain to handle. Shock can really mess you up, you know.”

“Yeah, maybe…” She paused. “But it’s still weird, isn’t it? I mean, usually when something horrible like that happens to him and we don’t need to know about it, he just keeps all the details to himself. He wouldn’t just tell us he found thirteen corpses; he’d just, I don’t know, say it was ‘a lot’ and focus on the important part!”

“Unless…” 

Tuffnut’s eyes grew somber as he trailed off, a new, different understanding smoothing his frown into a straight line.

Ruffnut braced herself.

“Unless?” she said.

“Unless,” he said, “the Scourge wasn’t the important part.”

On another day, it would’ve been funny how packed those six paltry words came out to where even Barf and Belch tilted up their heads in attention (you know, because they couldn’t understand Norse). But Ruffnut wasn’t laughing right now, and neither was Tuffnut, for that matter.

“Then what is the important part?” she asked, the first tremors of dread breaking her mask.

Tuffnut turned nervously flitting eyes onto her, but before he could properly put words to his own concern, Barf and Belch let out simultaneous growls.

“Barf?”

“Belch?”

Barf and Belch angled their heads left as though reaching for a distant noise, and, for a moment, Ruffnut almost wrote it off as maybe one of the boars unnoticeably escaping from the Boar Pit. But then they were looking right, then left, then right, and then—

Belch’s pupils narrowed into slits.

“Seriously, boy—boys? Boys,” Ruffnut said, “seriously. What’s—?”

She was eating sky before she could even finish.

She wasn’t sure whose scream pitched uncomfortably close to Snotlout’s in surprise—the sound itself shifted into gleeful cackling pretty quickly, and it could’ve been either one of them, really—but the once distant blur sharpening into view the closer Barf and Belch got to it was unmistakable.

“Hey, isn’t that Hiccup’s hut?” Tuffnut asked uncertainly. “Why’s Barf and Belch taking us to Hiccup’s hut?”

Ruffnut swallowed. “I don’t know, but it can’t be good.” She patted Barf’s neck in silent request for him to pick up the pace, and Tuffnut let out another shout as the wind suddenly blasted in their faces.

When her vision cleared, they were landing near Hiccup’s blacksmith stall.

And Hiccup was nowhere to be seen.

“Hey, Hiccup, you here?” Ruffnut called.

“This isn’t funny, H!” Tuffnut said when the words simply echoed back at them. “Seriously. Nobody’s laughing, and that’s saying something, considering it’s us!”

Silence.

Barf and Belch clearly didn’t appreciate said silence as they roared into the tiny but open space. It bounced around the air for a second, before, finally, a louder, shriller roar sounded in response.

Ruffnut didn’t wait for Barf and Belch to react this time. She hopped down and sprinted for the source of the familiar cry. Tuffnut and Barf and Belch followed behind her, sending tremors through the planks.

“Hiccup, you better answer me right this second, or else I swear to Loki—”

She cut off as a mass of black slammed into her, sending her stumbling back into Barf and Belch.

“Woah, T! Chill! It’s just us; we’re your friends, remember?” Tuffnut said. “And speaking of friends, you wouldn’t happen to know where ol’ H is, do you?”

It didn’t seem like Toothless heard him, as he instead looked up at Barf and Belch and growled something to them in low, whining tones. Barf and Belch wheezed back their own agitation, and Toothless whined again.

“Hey, Toothless, calm down, buddy,” Ruffnut told the frantic dragon soothingly. The last word lingered on her tongue like ash, and it reminded her, suddenly and with all the force of a bludgeon, just why Barf and Belch had dragged them here.

Toothless made another distressed noise.

“Where’s Hiccup, Toothless?” she asked after a fearful beat.

Toothless turned big, terrified eyes on her and, without another sound, darted further into the enclosed room. 

Her heart in her throat, Ruffnut made chase.

read full fic here!

#HTTYD #Race to the Edge #Hiccup Haddock #Ruffnut Thorston #Tuffnut Thorston #Fishlegs Ingerman #Snotlout Jorgenson #Astrid Hofferson #Viggo Grimborn #Hiccstrid #Vigcup #500+ #preview #fluff and angst #fanfiction

[sweetbubblies]

gassy half dragon femboy being the size of a full dragon, being cute but intimidating once he shifts to turn around, his massive tail lifting up... any adventurers trying to steal his hoard get blasted by the full force of a dragon's ass

Ooooh! Yes yes yes!

Puny adventures rooting around in the gold trying shove anything in their bags before the dragon shows up. Suddenly the floor rumbles and a loud growling is heard. The doomed party looks up in awe at the titanic half dragon, arms folding and clearly irritated. As the party begs for mercy the dragon simply turns around, bending over slightly and lifting up his tail showing a chubby butt fattened by hundred of cows. There’s small grunt before..

“Mmmnngh..!”

*BBBBBBRRRRRRREAAAPPPPPP!!* *PPPPPPPPOOOORRRPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRTTTT!!*

unleashing two massive searing hot farts that stink of burnt flesh.

Hmmm…I think I’ll name this cutie Garnet ♦️

#gassy oc #eproctophilia #farting #hyper fart

[plumptactician]

Seems Ivy has taken it upon herself to wake the Divine one... for the 6th day in a row. Such diligence, and such a feast she's brought for them too. If one didn't know better they might say the Elusian beauty was behind Alear's rapid gain and decline in mobility.

"All this movement is really get tiring.." she only moved a couple of inches along the floor but was already worn down, letting a deep, brassy burp from her lips while she waited for her next 'meal' with Ivy.. if you could even call it a meal.. there was always so much food, yet somehow the Divine Dragon was able to consume it all quite easily.. her gluttony was blatant and so to was her gassiness... but it was fine, she was relying on her best partner to help with everything.. especially.. bringing Alear her meals.. it was a nice break when the two dined together.. and made a mess of the place.

@outrealm-gates

[x-tracuddlycactus]

I actually love your list! Would you give reasoning to some of them (especially those who are high on the list)? Like wriothesley, zhongli etc.

Aww ty!

(My reasoning kind of goes all over the place here)

Soo my main reason for B.aizhu being at the top is mainly because I just love him that much. I don't really see him being a very gassy man, but when he burps, it always has a level of bass to it that he can feel rumbling in his chest. I can also totally see him using his burps to tease his s/o if he knows they like it, but he'd do it in the most polite way possible if that makes sense? Gonna have to make a tiny drabble about that idk hehehehehehe. He's purely there for personal preferences lol

I.tto actually shares first place with B.aizhu! It's because not only is he one of my top favorites, he actually is probably the best burper out of everyone on the list. Want to hear him belch out the alphabet? Done. Want to see him rattle the table from how loud he can get? Easy peasy! On top of all of that, he is absolutely shameless and cocky (which are traits I adore). He really has it going for me to say the least.

As for N.euvillette, I put him in third (technically 2nd) because he has the potential to be an even better belcher. It's just that his personality keeps him from achieving that. He's a very refined dragon, but that doesn't mean he can't burp. His main diet canonically consists of water, so he's bound to have these wet, bubbly, and guttural burps that really sound out and can make heads turn. The thing is, aside from knowing how to repress them, he doesn't really have much control over them, so he falls short on the talent end.

I put W.rio a tier below N.euvi, mainly out of personal preference, and because I think he would have these sort of lazy burps that last for a craaaaazy amount of time. I kind of want him to be more shameless tbh, cause he will definitely try to hold back around people he knows. Strangers, not so much. If he didn't hold back, he would definitely have much louder, more thunderous belches that would echo in his office. I think he would also try to practice learning how to burp on command if he had the time.

Z.hongli is another character that is up there for personal preferences. I think he has the same range as N.euvi when it comes to burping. The thing is, while N.euvi holds back to keep his reputation, Z.hongli holds back because he wants to be polite. However, if he finds out someone he dislikes is annoyed by his eructations, he'll casually let loose some airy burps into his fist just to fuck with them, all while playing dumb and saying he's an old man with heartburn lol. Idk ig since Z.hongli has the choice to care about his manners or not, and N.euvi has no choice but to be mindful. It hits differently?

(TW For alcohol mention.)

Last but not least, we have K.aveh! I put him in last place on the top tier because, honestly, I feel like this guy has some top-tier burps. The thing is, he doesn't eat as often as he should, so he can't produce them as deep and grand as I'd like him to. He does burp pretty often since he's probably stressed all the time, and all that tension just puts pressure on his stomach. Plus, he is prone to hunger burps. However, these ones are short, quiet, and sound more like a hiccup than anything else.

The problem is, I would prefer someone to burp because they're relaxed, full, or even feeling mischievous. In fact, I was debating on putting G.aming in his place instead, and writing this out is making me think that again. Hmm...

#cactus asks #cactus tiers #sorry this is a long one #this really made me think tbh lol #i might swap g.aming and k.aveh's places #idk my personal preferences for the characters get in the way of my judgement