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she-lovesmovies · 11 months

Text

Sodo × fem!reader

She/her reader

Words count: 2 486

Summary: You have a fight with Sodo and he gives you the silent treatment after that.

Warnings: hurt/comfort, angst/fluff. She throws up at some point but it's short and not details. She also eat less for a short time so TW for ED.

Notes: English is not my first language so some lines may be grammatically incorrect, + typos, sorry.

(Pic coming from Pinterest)

"Mountain I don't know what to do. I feel like he doesn't want to talk to me. At first I understood: he's angry, l'm not gonna talk to him, l'm gonna wait. But it's been hours and I really feel like we need to talk about it... "

"Honestly, I personally don't think what you did was that bad. He's just annoyed by anything and everything. You should try to talk to him."

"Ok..? You sighted.

Rain was looking at you, shaking his head no.

But what could you do, really?

You had walked on his guitar and broke two of the buttons. Not just broke in the he could put them back on way, but you had crushed them.

You couldn't even remember how it happened.

But you remembered how Sodo had looked at you.

How the atmosphere of the room had instantly changed. For the long time you had been with Sodo, or hang out with him, you had never felt that.

It was your fault, clearly. You knew your boyfriend was always leaving his things on the floor so you should have been careful.

After your initial shock, you had fall to your knees and tried to put the pieces back. But he had harshly told you to leave the room. You had quickly complied. And he hadn't talk to you since the incident.

You hadn't even had the chance to apologize...

You trusted Rain. But you had to talk to Sodo.

————————————————

So here you were, in front of his door.

"Sodo ?"

You knocked on the door and opened it. Discreetly walking inside.

He was sitting on the floor, his back to you. His ears and head twitching at the sound of your movements.

His tail was moving violently.

He looked like an animal.

"Sodo ? It's me….. Ijust wanted to say l'm sorry."

"Get out." He growled.

Ok.

So it was gonna be a hard one.

"Sodo, I'm really sorry, can we talk about this ?"

"What about ? You broke my guitar. I won't be able to play it. That's it. Get out.?

"I'm not getting out until you're looking at me. You're clearly not well and I'm not leaving you like this."

He angrily turned around and looked at you dead in the eyes.

He wasn't wearing his mask so you could see his eyes. And now you knew why they were ghouls. Why people thought of them as demons.

"And why would I want you being the one to help me?"

"Because I'm your girlfriend…..?" You answer quietly, forced to look at the floor under his cold scary gaze.

He laughed sadistically and you knew it had been the wrong thing to say and you were both gonna get hurt now.

" You're just a girl I fuck and hang out with. I could do it with any other siblings or sisters. Do you think you have anything special? Because right now apart from breaking my guitar, you didn't do much around here."

He doesn't mean it.

You knew he didn't mean it.

He is just angry.

He loves you.

You knew he did.

After everything you went through together.

But it still hurt.

"You don't mean it. You're just angry.."

"Just angry? Just angry? I could fucking kill you right now! don't know why i'm not doing it. Probably because my brothers would murder me after that. But trust me I would fucking rip you apart if I could. You're fucking useless in the clergy. Copia is being nice to you because that's who he is. He doesn't care about you. I don't care about it."

"No, you don't mean it..." your lips started shaking.

"I- mean- every-words- I- said." He articulated.

At this point your whole body was trembling.

"Stop fucking trembling. It's pissing me off!" He harshly said before turning back to his broken guitar.

"Sorry." you muttered.

He doesn’t mean it.

He doesn't mean it.

Both of you didn't say anything for the next two minutes.

It can't end on this.

This conversation can't end like that.

How can I arrange it ?

How can I fix his guitar?

"Sodo, tell me what should I do...?"

You could hear the tears in your own voice.

You knew his guitar was the thing he loved the most in this whole world.

He always had play with this guitar since he stopped being a bassist.

"Fucking leave me alone and don't talk to me again. I don't want to see your face."

You couldn't just stop talking to him.

Or hang out with him.

Did that mean you both were nothing now.

"Are you breaking up with me ?" You ask with a quiet voice.

He didn't answer.

You were in the wrong.

He had every right to not talk. He had asked you to leave him be and you were in the wrong.

So you turned around, defeated, and walked out of the door.

You were in the wrong.

He didn't answer...

——————————————-

4 days had passed since your fight with Sodo.

You both hadn't talk to each other.

You were trying to reach him but he just kept avoiding and ignoring you.

You had heard from Aether that he was in the studio, talking with Copia.

So you ran to them, knowing he couldn't avoid you if he was talking with Copia.

You entered the studio.

Copia glanced at you but Sodo kept talking not acknowledging you or the sound you made.

He probably heard or smell you coming.

"Sodo...”

The ghoul kept on going on.

Copia looked at you, then Sodo.

"Sodo. Please can we talk ?"

No answer.

“Sodo answer me !” You yelled.

Copia looked at you and opened his mouth to say something to Sodo but the ghoul was faster.

"We can keep this conversation elsewhere if you're distracted Papa."

Copia looked like he didn't know what to do.

The silence grounded itself in the room.

“Please talk to me." You whispered, your voice shaking.

Silence again.

Then Sodo started talking with Copia again, who clearly wasn't listening but just looking at you with pity, extending his hand toward you to reach you.

“My dear maybe if...”

Tears rolled down your face and you whimpered just before running out of the room.

You were embarrassed.

Being treated like that in front of Papa.

Being treated like you were nothing.

Like you were useless and didn't exist.

You arrived to your bedroom and locked yourself into your bedroom.

You ran to your bathroom and toilet.

You started throwing up.

Your mouth and throat were sour because of the vomit.

But the way Sodo treated you had triggered some background traumas you had.

You've been through similar things in middle school.

You had to endure those type of behaviors from people you loved.

And it had leave the child you were, traumatized by some specific things.

You couldn't help the way your body was reacting.

And for the next 3 weeks, you had been throwing up every night.

After your duties. After all the pressure was gone. Your body was letting it all go.

But it hurt you.

Your stomach, your throat, your head was hurting you.

Your whole body was exhausted by throwing up for hours. So after the first week you started eating less to vomit a little less food.

Your body kept trying to vomit something and it hurt, but it wasn't as painful as when you were eating.

You also had sleeping problems because of that. It was not often that you were throwing up in the middle of the night and apart from thinking too hard about everything that was going on, you frequently were woke up by nightmares.

You had learned from Rain that Sodo's guitar had been fixed a week ago. You were glad. But the silent treatment kept going on. And honestly it was almost like you had accept it, it pained you everytime you saw him, but you were getting use to it. It didn't mean you were more happy. Getting use to it didn't arrange anything. You still felt miserable. Wandering in the corridors, doing your tasks like a ghost, you still felt useless.

Right now, you were trying to eat your breakfast. The only meal you had everyday.

Thinking about what you could do today.

You knew how it was gonna go: you were gonna go to your bedroom, lay in your bed, start thinking about Sodo, about your relationship, about everything you did, about how you did the same as when you were young, about your last relationships, about how in the wrong you were. About how apart from the guitar you were just a pain in the ass and uninteresting.

About how you knew Sodo was stubborn but if he really loved you he couldn't avoid you for that long.

About how he had always been right: he was saying the truth and didn't want you.

And you would throw up, and cry. And wish someone was there, but at the same time wished no one would see you like that, and wished to only disappear and die.

"Y/n. I know you want and need some time alone, but we're really worried about you.."

You didn't dare to look at Mountain while eating your cereals.

"Hm."

"He's right, you don't look good." Agreed Swiss.

"So that's why you all decided to sit with me this morning? Then that's really kind of you, for once, to sit with me. But don't worry I'II be able to achieve my duties. So you can tell Copia to stop sending his ghouls because whatever my mood and state I'll do my job. I don't want to get thrown out of the clergy."

You stood up from your chair and took your bowl.

But before you had the chance to walk away, Mountain's tail grabbed your forearm.

"Y/n, you need to talk to him.” Mountain muttered.

You started laughing hysterically.

"He's been giving me the silent treatment for 5 weeks. At this point he just doesn't want me in his life. Plus, last time you told me talk to him and look how greatly it went. It's okay. I fucked up. It was stupid of me to think he cared and loved me. You all don't have to pretend. I’ll just stop annoying everyone."

Cumulus tried to speak:

"Y/n it's not what we-“

You didn't let her finished as you took your forearm back and quickly walked out of the cafeteria.

"We need to do something. Sodo is fucking up all the rehearsals and she clearly is not doing well?”

"I don't care about the fucking rehearsals Aether. She's gonna kill herself if she keeps going on like this." Said Mountain.

"We need to talk some fucking sense in Sodo's ego and brain." Agreed Cirrus.

——————————————-

You were in your room.

In your bed.

Under your white sheets.

Your head below your pillow.

Your head was hurting you so bad.

You didn't know if the pillow was suppose to take the pain away, to cut yourself from the outside world, or just suffocate yourself to die instantly.

The tinnitus in your ears was so loud you didn't hear your door opening.

"Y/n.."

You groaned. Still deaf from the person entering.

"Y/n, it's me, Sodo."

You were on the verge of passing out.

The bucket for throwing up next to your bed was almost full.

You didn't know why tonight was that bad.

"Talk to me, please?

Sodo thought it was only fair that you were giving him the silent treatment back, after what he did to you. But he couldn't stop himself from getting worried at the sounds leavingg your body.

He rushed to your bed when he clearly heard cries.

He pulled the sheets and you shriek.

You curled on yourself even more than before, as if trying to protect you.

Sodo took in the sigh of you.

You were pale.

Really pale.

It looked like you hadn't eat for days.

He kneeled next to the bed, where your face was now resting and caressed it.

"Y/n open your eyes."

You shook your head and he stood up, just to sit on your bed and tried to pull you up so you were sitting.

You were just limbs and as you sat up, your head fell past his shoulder. Your chin resting on it as your chest was laying on his.

"Sodo." you finally whimpered.

You had recognized him.

"Yeah, it's me darling."

"You're talking to me." She sobs.

And Sodo’s heart couldn’t hold it anymore.

It broke on itself and tears started to well up in his eyes.

And a sudden wave of immense sadness and pain washed over him.

He was overwhelmed by sorrow.

It took him a second to realize it was your pain he was feeling.

His arms encircled you and he hugged you like he had never hug anyone.

"I'm so sorry. l'm so sorry. I was being immature. It was never your fault. For anything. I let my guitar lay around. I was an asshole to get angry at something so stupid. It was just buttons. I didn't mean anything I say. Please believe me. I love you. I love you so much. Please."

You closed your eyes from relief.

Your head was still hurting you like hell therefore the need to vomit was starting to vanish.

But then your mind reminded you of those past 3 weeks.

"Why? Why did you do that to me? For 3 weeks. You're lying. You don't love me.."

You tried to get out of his embrace but you were just too weak.

"I'm sorry. I was angry at myself. And then I thought you would never forgive me. That you were just better without someone so immature. I'm so sorry. I don't want our relationship to get toxic. l'll never do that to you again. I'm so sorry. l've never been more miserable. Please come back."

You cried even harder as you heard Sodo's own cries.

"I don't know. I don't know. I'm so tired Sodo. I love you so much. But right now I'm too tired to think."

"Okay, okay don't worry darling. I brought you some biscuits so you can eat and then we'll just lay down and talk about all this tomorrow. Do you want me to go ?”

"Please. Stay. I need you to hold me."

Sodo nodded. He didn't loose his grip on you as you both laid down on the bed.

He hugged you from behind.

"I love you so much. I'm so sorry. So sorry." He sobs quietly.

"I know Sodo." whispered as your mind drifted into unconsciousness.

The ringing in your ears had stopped.

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