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Some Pretty Batshit Things That Have Been Said on The Great British Baking Show
“I think your sister tastes lovely.”
“Who wants to eat some carpet?”
“Leave your balls alone!”
“The six sides represent the six wives of Henry the Eighth...”
“If you’re gonna serve a cake, serve it phallic.”
“I had to rush the unicorn eyelashes.”
“This is the gayest challenge of all time.”
“More cats should be married.”
“That’s the one thing I know about children- don’t drop them.”
*drinks an entire cup of egg whites* “Reminds me of Rocky.”
“Please don’t cry in the chocolate.”
“Wow, that’s a terrible way to kill a nun.”
“Your wife’s gonna think that you’re having an affair with a mango.”
“One word to describe yourself.” “Depressing.”
“I didn’t realize that dairy is not only a cow. There’s like goat, sheep, buffalo…horse?”
“You’d eat it if you were given it.” “As a prisoner, maybe.”
“Wasn’t one of the children in ‘The Sound of Music’ called streusel?”
“Welcome to the least laddy lads’ club. We’re discussing the setting temperature of gelatin.” “A very masculine conversation, actually.”
“At the moment I feel sort of like Jesus did on Maundy Thursday.”
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froggybagels · 18 days ago
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i followed paul hollywood on twitter, saw this tweet:
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and immediately unfollowed. it’s too much i’m sorry
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adeladekane · 20 days ago
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I love how Paul Hollywood is slightly thicc yet classically handsome. Best of all worlds.
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bettercallcas · 25 days ago
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paul you know this was unnecessary
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peterstarkss · a month ago
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Thank you Great Pottery Throwdown for filling the GBBO shaped hole in my heart
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milfmaul · a month ago
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This is so awkward why is this so awkward
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itmocca · a month ago
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The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 5
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 5: Anneka Rice, John Bishop, Nadine Coyle and Ade Adepitan tackle decorative choux buns and financiers before making a showstopping cake that represents something from their bucket list. #gbbo
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 5: Matt Lucas welcomes TV presenter Anneka Rice, comedian John Bishop, pop star Nadine Coyle and wheelchair basketball player-turned-presenter Ade Adepitan into the tent. Under the watchful eye of judges Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith, the celebrity bakers attempt decorative choux buns in the signature and tackle financiers in the technical before…
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dakatmew · a month ago
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i’ve been rewatching the great british bake off and honestly they’re running into a problem. they already have a couple but they’re not acknowledging them (paul having more weight than prue when it comes to judging, paul’s advice/criticism being shown first ALWAYS or close to always, etc) but one is that they’re just plain not thinking about escalation.
like, if you look at the first few seasons, they had very basic bakes that were just exceptional, like the gingerbread coliseum, which, while impressive, is definitely something people could make at home if they were determined enough. my beef with the show is that they’re escalating it to new heights and pretending that they’re still average, everyday bakers.
like, you cannot tell me that the average baker has tempered chocolate. no. no way. who make a chocolate sphere for the sole purpose of melting it away for presentation points? that’s not an average baker level anymore, that’s insane. that’s chef level, to the point that i look at the shit they do and i feel sort of like i’m watching cake boss but with more variety than just cakes.
they have a problem with escalation because they’re presenting everyone on that show as an average baker when they have to keep escalating the challenges, not because of the bakers themselves, but because the audience wants to see something they can’t do. it is no longer, and hasn’t been for a while, the “average baker” who wins it. i’m not saying they’re not good, they’re just. unbelievable that they’re people who are average at baking.
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itmocca · a month ago
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The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 3
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 3: Dizzee Rascal, Nick Grimshaw, Philippa Perry and Reece Shearsmith tackle vegetable slices, a royal technical and a 'selfie' made entirely from biscuit. #gbbo #SU2C
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 3: Dizzee Rascal, Nick Grimshaw, Philippa Perry and Reece Shearsmith tackle vegetable slices, a royal technical and a ‘selfie’ made entirely from biscuit.     MC Dizzee Rascal, radio DJ Nick Grimshaw, psychologist Philippa Perry and actor-writer Reece Shearsmith brave the baking tent in the name of charity. All that stands between them and the title…
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secret-medium-mario · a month ago
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Paul Hollywood voice: These are some finely chopped
NÜTS
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wondersmith-and-sons · a month ago
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taskmaster is the chaotic evil to gbbo’s lawful good. sometimes you wanna watch people fret next to the oven and be nice to each other. sometimes you want to watch comedians go apeshit
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itmocca · a month ago
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The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 2
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 2: James McAvoy, Anne-Marie, David Baddiel and Dame Kelly Holmes make signature decorative tarts and a savoury technical, and render their spirit animals in cake form in the showstopper. #gbbo #bakeoff
The Great Celebrity Bake Off for SU2C episode 2: James McAvoy, Anne-Marie, David Baddiel and Dame Kelly Holmes make signature decorative tarts and a savoury technical, and render their spirit animals in cake form in the showstopper.     Celebrities join Matt Lucas in the tent aiming to impress judges Paul and Prue as they bake for Stand Up To Cancer in this Great British Bake Off spin off.   The…
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koschei-taylor · 2 months ago
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What is inside Paul Hollywood’s pockets, James?
Why his massive fucking ego of course...
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weh8paulhollywood · 2 months ago
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paul hollywood: overbaked. underproven. this is the worst thing i've ever eaten. you whore. you fool. i'd rather eat dog food than this, you bastard buffoon.
paul hollywood, immediately after: thank you very much :)
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mangolesbian · 2 months ago
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i’m absolutely losing it over this youtube comment
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streetsolo · 2 months ago
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“Most people say that "The Last Jedi" is full of s--t, and the last Jedi herself, Daisy Ridley, might agree.”
“Ridley, 28, seemed to flush her chances of winning down the toilet. Literally.”
“Celebrity judge Paul Hollywood was a bit put off by the chunks in her toilet, but compared to the chunks one usually finds in a toilet, these were fortunately made from underbaked flour.”
THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER!! 
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picniconabroom · 2 months ago
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After years and years of watching GBBO I finally had a go at baking (and eating) a victoria sponge and it was de-li-cious. It's such a simple and comforting cake, color me impressed!
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