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#geo dialogue.txt
geordon · 3 years
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I think there's a pretty big difference between lashing out when scared/stressed and being an angry person.
Between having an amount if anger in you that comes out when things get bad and being the one that makes thing bad
Between violence in reaction to something and actively wanting to cause harm
And I think some people could really do better in understanding that difference
#geo dialogue.txt#idk ive just been thinking about how the vrai fandom characterizes gordon#and how some people apparently watched a wat different series than i did based on the fanfics ive either read or looked at the tag of#and some people try to skirt the line in a really weird way of oh no he literally attacked ben but then snapped out of it#which could maybe work in Specific Circumstances but. the one im thinking of was literally just. the kitchware was all on the counters#bc ben didnt know that that isnt how it should work. its such a disproportionate response#but the rest of the fic treats it like this isnt a major thing. like. i Inderstand that people respond to trauma in wild ways#i get that. but if you attack someone over something that small then maybe you should tell them it would be best if they hung back for a bi#then you should go directly to therapy and get that sorted bc thats messed up and you cant pretend everything is fine bc you cried abt it#and you know what? the entire rest of the plot of that specific fic wouldnt have happened. which id be fine with#bc it involved gordon deciding to play with bens feelings to find out what those feelings were#which would suck and be awful even if it wasnt involving someone who spend a good chunk of time as a science experiment#if youre going to characterize gordon as someone with barely controlled anger issued whod do that then dont chicken out#if youre going to make him do these things then dont continue on to talk about how hes still a good person#maybe i only have strong feelings abt this bc im someone who lashes out when cornered & also with a sibling with really bad anger issues#but it really bothers me when people completely ignore that pre rescas gordon greeted everyone cheerily#and that post rescas gordon genuinely wanted to try to save as many peopld as possible#and acab stream gordon actively wanted civillians gone before the shooted started#that doesnt read to me as someone who'd attack someone who was trying to help but didnt know how#anyway hi i have a lot of feelings about things and got reminded of this in particular#not tagging the fandom stuff but if yoy wanna reblog or add onto this feel free
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geordon · 3 years
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So I've been actually playing half life recently
I've died so many times but a lot of them were "whuh oh missed a jump" which was very fun for my friends watching.
Really useful for the thing I've been half working on mut might never post anything about outside of like 2 discord servers and 1 Twitter thread
Also really useful for just getting my hyperfixation kicked back in
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geordon · 3 years
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Tumblr let me add tags to posts that are already posted or in the queue
Please please I Will destroy this entire website /hj
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geordon · 3 years
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HLVRAI but its 3 team paintball that got too serious
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geordon · 3 years
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Hlvrai gordon freeman thoughts
This man has adhd
- special interest in science. No he can't tell you how the science works or give you a step by step of how he solved a problem, he just knows this is the answer shut up
Gets Loud when stressed, but doesnt actually get angry easily
- sometimes you feel like you gotta yell for people to actually hear what you're saying! And yes, he did get violent between rescas and getting out, but also. No one else really took any of this seriously and that affected him Very Badly
Trans. Because I said so.
Bi but also the most oblivious man you will ever meet.
Selectively mute
- probably goes fully nonverbal for a bit after getting home postcanon bc do you know how much of a relief it is to not have to talk for a while? And how easy it is for your voice to just. Stop working if you're quiet for too long?
- taught himself sign language from every resource he had access to
Chronic pain
- specifically migraines & joint pain
Likes cooking
- also, likes singing along to music while cooking, maybe dance a bit while waiting for water to boil or the oven to preheat
Exclusively plays more chill games for a While postcanon
- would you want to play an fps after nearly dying a whole bunch while being actively pursued by aliens and the military? No. Go play some farming simulators and listen to the nice calm music
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geordon · 3 years
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Man, that bit where I had some pikmin posts causes me to lose a follower & for someone who was scrolling through, hitting like on every post, to stop
Can't believe people are mean to the little plant friends
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geordon · 3 years
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I think its really fun and cool of me to have posted a vrai fic and only link to it on my Twitter (which has like. 2 followers that aren't friends who know nothing abt the series)
And completely forgot to here
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geordon · 3 years
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Bbbbbbb a friend started pikmin posting on discord and I am being very gently carried back into the hyperfixation by an army of little whistling friends
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geordon · 3 years
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When will tumblr mobile show my icon changed without me having to actively click on it
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geordon · 3 years
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I've been having some thoughts about stuff and I think I've pinpointed the reason I feel the way I do about fr33m4nc3
So hi I am a 25 year old. One of my coworkers has a 9 year old daughter who, despite not actively working with this coworker a lot, I've heard so many stories about. From what books series she's reading to stories about how she was potty trained
Ive seen this kid maybe twice in person, briefly, and didn't do more than maybe just say hi
I can't imagine her as an adult. Same as the kid I used to babysit who was maybe 8 years younger than me. Every time I think of my neighbor's grandkid Mia, I think of the 4 year old who kept trying to tell stories that started with "when I was 5, ". She'd be a senior in high school this year but I cant think of her as anything other than a little kid.
I have a cousin who's 4 years younger than me and I felt emotional whiplash when I heard she was graduation high school because I only think of her as the kid I briefly had to share a bed with (or else sleep on the floor) after a hurricane. The kid who'd throw tantrums and cry and yell because she wanted something else for breakfast
So imagine you hear about your coworkers kid, a toddler, maybe you get shown some pictures, maybe you meet her a few times, maybe babysit, who knows. But you know her as this little kid. And then your workplace explodes and you barely survive and you wake up 20 years later and that little kid? That toddler? Is now nearly your age. Is now an adult who's built a giant robot and has actively killed maybe-people and aliens for a few years at least.
How would you feel? When everything you knew about this person was based on her being so small and probably unable to get dressed properly without parental help.
I feel like it'd take a long time to get used to the conflicting thoughts. The instant connect to that kid when you hear her name rather than who she is now. But pretty much everything I see about the ship is mid-canon or just post-canon and it rubs me completely the wrong way.
And thats not even taking the other side of things into account. The "hey this guy who worked with my parents & was the same-ish age as this guy who's nearly twice my age now, this guy ive been hearing stories about my whole life (stories of him as an adult), this guy has reappeared and looks about my age and people think we'd make a nice couple (despite the fact that he at least knew of my when I was barely old enough to hold full conversations and not even in school yet)"
Maybe I'm overthinking things or just overly sensitive to things that take an adult and a kid who knew (or knew of) each other, add time, and then say its fine to put them in a relationship. It just feels really . Bad to me.
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geordon · 3 years
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Every time I add my funny character tags to a thing, I briefly worry that op will see it and think anything other than "oh thats just a character tag"
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geordon · 3 years
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Every day I see a character design that makes me go :/
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geordon · 3 years
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Every day I have gay emotions about barney calhoun
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geordon · 3 years
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Removed reblogs from a blog run by someone who does Bad Shipping Stuff on another blog
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geordon · 3 years
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What if I went through this blog and started actually tagging fandoms and characters and stuff
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