#gives you some more nuance

[afewproblems]

Season Two Halloween AU Part Ten (Final Part)

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine

Synopsis: What if Eddie had been at Tina's Halloween Party in Season Two? Featuring Steve!Whump, Stancy Breakup, and Eddie just trying to keep up with all these new revelations about who King-Steve actually is...

Thank you to Jess @strangersteddierthings for your encouragement and kind words, and to all of you that have been following along with this story. Thank you for your patience, I hope you enjoy the final installment!

***

It doesn't take much to get Dustin on board, especially given the little shits ego.

Nancy and Eddie manage to catch him outside during lunch period the following day, next to the bike racks. With Hawkins Middle just a block away from the highschool, it's easy to make their way over.

"Called it, I totally called it," Dustin preens with a wide grin, Eddie holds back the urge to roll his eyes.

Nancy levels Dustin with an unimpressed glare as she crosses her arms.

"It's not too late, we could make this work without him," Nancy says dryly, and Eddie has to bite his cheek to keep from laughing at the way Dustin's mouth drops open as he looks between Nancy and Eddie with a stricken expression.

"No, wait!" Dustin says, his voice pitched high with panic, "I want to help!" 

"Steve is a good guy, he helped my mom with the groceries last week because she had to work late," the kid continues, his voice softer now.

"I can tell he's sad, when he thinks you aren't looking at him, mom had the same thing after my dad left". 

Dustin looks up at Eddie now, a wary suspicion in his eyes, "he's been like that since the last time I covered for you," he throws long exaggerated finger quotes around the word, 'covered' as he openly glares at Eddie.

"What did you say to him before the tunnels?" Dustin demands fiercely, and even Nancy turns to look at Eddie with a questioning tilt to her head.

Frustration courses through his chest now, hot and bubbling, he has to take a deep breath to keep from yelling. 

As if Eddie hasn't been asking himself that very question, as if he hasn't been turning that moment over and over in his mind, trying to find the moment, the words, responsible for Steve's distance.

"Dustin," Nancy says sharply, "this is not the time--"

"What are you talking about," Dustin turns to Nancy, gesturing at Eddie who bristles, "we're making a plan and that should include what not to say this time."

"This was a stupid idea," Eddie bites out, turning on his heel, his ears are warm under his hair and he can feel the angry flush slowly make its way down his neck, he takes three steps before a hand catches his elbow, halting his path.

"Okay Dustin knock it off," Nancy says quietly, her head on a swivel, watching for any lunchtime stragglers lingering around them or teachers on supervision. 

Satisfied that no one seems to be watching their conversation, she turns back to Eddie and squeezes his elbow one last time before letting her hand drop away, "and you, calm down, we're all here because we want the same thing".

"Well, some of us more than others," Dustin pipes up, wiggling his eyebrows at Eddie who wants to sink into the concrete. 

"Dustin," Nancy bites out between her teeth, "Mike said the Snowball is in two days, think you could get Steve to take you?"

Dustin scrunches his nose as he looks at Nancy, "are you kidding," he scoffs, "all I have to do is tell my mom Steve offered to take me and she'll call him to thank him, he'll have no choice but to agree like it was his idea". 

Nancy blinks once at Dustin and Eddie can't help but stare at the little monster's face as he grins up at the two of them. It's honestly a good plan given what Eddie knows of Steve, and even Nancy begins to nod slowly.

"Okay, then your job," Nancy turns to Eddie now, "is to surprise him here when he arrives at the dance, Dustin's right".

Nancy doesn't look at the little twerp as she says it but nearly rolls her eyes at the triumphant laugh that bursts forth from the kid.

"An ambush is probably the best way to catch him, and Eddie," Nancy turns to fully face him and reaches out to squeeze his arm with small hands, "just…be gentle with Steve, as much as you can".

"Are we all clear on the plan then?" She asks, taking a step back towards the sidewalk path leading back to the school. 

"Yes mom," Eddie huffs, shooting Dustin a matching grin as Nancy sighs loudly.

"Just be here for seven," she says tightly before turning in her heel and stalking off towards the highschool.

"She's pretty intense hey?" Eddie says, turning back to the kid, he trails off at the scowl Dustin gives him in response.

"Nance is cool and has a gun, I wouldn't mess with her and I wouldn't mess with Steve if I were you," Dustin scoffs, taking a step closer.

Eddie swallows roughly at the sudden proximity, looking around the school yard for any stragglers making their way back to class. 

"Keep your voice down you little shit," he hisses, reaching out to pull Dustin farther away from the bike rack and the double front doors. He tries not to let the news of Nancy's weapon cache fluster him but Dustin must see something in Eddie's expression if the sudden smug grin is anything to go by.

"I'm just saying, you're new to the party and we protect each other, so if you're just looking to mess with him--"

"Jesus Christ," Eddie hisses, bringing his hands up to his eyes. He presses his fingers in until his vision explodes in a kaleidoscope of stars and counts to five, breathing deeply through his nose.

"I'm only going to say this one more time, so tell your little party because I ain't doing another shovel talk from someone whose voice hasn't even dropped".

Eddie ignores the squawk Dustin makes as he lowers his hands, "I just want to talk to Steve and see where this goes, I am not getting my hopes up that this is all gonna be 'Happily Ever After' or some shit, and you shouldn't either".

Eddie watches as Dustin frowns skeptically and has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from rolling his eyes.

"But I swear, I'm not messing with him, okay?" 

Dustin stares at Eddie for what feels like an age, saying nothing. His gaze is anything but warm, it feels like he's being analyzed and he wishes that Nancy were still here to absorb some of the strange attention the kid has focused on him.

Eddie is about to tell him to forget it, to storm off back to the highschool when Dustin finally utters a simple, "okay". 

It throws Eddie off for a moment, he stands in the patchy November worn grass, shivering in the harsh wind, mouth opening and closing in surprise.

"That's it?" He asks faintly, watching as Dustin swings his backpack off his shoulder and unzips it. He reaches in and pulls out a bright yellow walkie talkie and holds it out to Eddie expectantly.

"The party frequency is 467.5625," Dustin says as Eddie takes the device. 

He looks from the walkie in his hands to Dustin and scoffs, "you expect me to remem--"

"Channel eight then, Jesus," the kid huffs out, "don't make me take it back, this is a big deal Munson, you're one of us now". 

Eddie holds back a smile but it's a near thing. 

It feels strange, the warmth in his chest at the words. It shouldn’t feel as big as it does, but the heavy walkie in his hands feels like acceptance, something Eddie has always insisted that he never needed. He had Wayne, he had Hellfire, and Corroded Coffin, what did it matter if the other teens gave him a wide berth in the halls, or if teachers assumed the worst of him without evidence. 

But as Eddie taps the walkie onto the palm of his left hand, that feeling of warmth grows until it travels up his throat into a sudden lump that chokes his words. 

Fuck. 

Eddie blinks away the burning sting in his eyes once, twice, before lowering himself into a bow to hide the moisture he knows is just a split second from becoming a very evident problem. 

Dustin steps back in surprise as Eddie coughs to hide the waver in his voice.

"I uh, humbly accept your invitation and will endeavor to assist with all future quests, even upon pain of death or dismemberment oh noble bard".

Eddie lets a small laugh loose as he stands back up to his full height, grinning at the delighted giggle Dustin makes, even as the kid loudly insists that he's actually an Artificer, duh.

"Could've fooled me with that inspired speech dude," Eddie shakes his head and begins making his way back towards the highschool, letting gravity take him down the small hill towards the trees with heavy steps. He feels lighter now than he has in a while.

Absolutely nothing could go wrong.

"Wait!"

The sound of quick steps and crunching dead leaves announces Dustin before Eddie can even turn to face Hawkins Middle.

He skids to a stop at the bottom of the hill, breathing heavily with a wild grin on his small face.

"I know we have a plan already, but I think I have an even better idea," he breathes out, nearly vibrating in excitement.

"Better than Wheelers?" Eddie says, raising his eyebrow and slowly crossing his arms over his chest, careful not to drop the walkie in the grass.

"It's genius," Dustin insists, "trust me".

***

It was not genius.

It is in fact the stupidest thing that Eddie has ever done.

Including the time he skipped school to climb the tallest tree in Mirkwood on a dare and ended up breaking his collarbone after falling ten feet.

But, Eddie supposes, this is exactly what happens when one listens to a thirteen year old.

Maybe this was how all urban legends started, as unsolicited advice from snarky little pre-teens with more confidence than common sense.

All of a sudden, you end up stowed away in the back of a car trying your damnedest to keep quiet so as not to tip off the driver.

Who you happen to be eavesdropping on. Again.

Fourth time's the charm after all.

Eddie tries to stay as still as he can, crouched down in the back of Steve's Beemer. How the hell did those Urban Legend serial killers make this seem so easy, Eddie thinks as they manage to hit yet another pothole, jostling his position behind Dustin's seat. Eddie's heart beat feels incredibly loud in his ears as he holds his breath between his teeth.

He wonders belatedly just what Hopper would do if he drove past them now and tries to swallow the sudden anxiety that clings to his throat.

"Remember," Steve interrupts Eddie's thoughts with his insistent tone, "you don't care, you're as cool as a cucumber, you let everything roll off your back," Steve says as the sound of the turn signal begins, the rhythmic tick tock keeping pace with his words.

"Like a duck?" Dustin asks from the passenger seat and Eddie has to fight to keep the snort that threatens to break free from his nose.

"Uh, I guess, just, look," Steve sighs as they slow down for a light if the red glow is any indication, "you don't want to come on too strong, what happens when you come on too strong?"

"It blows up in your face," Dustin says quietly as Steve speaks in unison with him, slapping the steering wheel once with the flat of his palm, making Eddie flinch in the back. 

God. Is that what Steve thinks he did?

"Exactly, Henderson, you got it! So what are you?"

"Cool as a cucumber," Dustin repeats, this time with more conviction in his voice and Eddie hopes the kid is a better actor than he thought because that is not the lesson he wants him taking away from this evening.

"Because you don't care," Steve says again, tapping the steering wheel with each word for emphasis and Eddie can hear the grin in his voice as he shifts in the driver's seat. 

"I don't care," Dustin repeats again, though in a much colder voice than before, and suddenly Eddie knows if Dustin could see him now, he'd be staring daggers at him.

Eddie rolls his eyes, he's not going to take the blame for every single word and feeling coming out of Steve's mouth and it isn't fair of Dustin to heap all of it on Eddie.

"You look like a million bucks, go get em tiger," Steve says gently as the car comes to a gentle halt. There's a fondness in his voice that Eddie hasn't heard before. 

He's never had a sibling either, but Eddie imagines that this is exactly how it would feel, witnessing their firsts, cheering them on as they head into the unknown. Being their protector from the things that go bump in the night, even if that thing was as small as a first heartbreak. 

God. King Steve just had to be a secret sweetheart didn't he?

Not that it was really much of a secret, Eddie thinks as Dustin opens the passenger door and hops out of the car--

Oh shit. 

Oh shit.

He had been so engrossed in the conversation he'd been eavesdropping on, yet again, that Eddie had forgotten to sneak out.

He had even kept the back passenger door open, ever so slightly, to avoid the sound of it alerting Steve when he made his escape at the same time as Dustin. Then all they had to do was line up their doors closing at the exact same time and Steve would be none the wiser.

Oh God, he really did it, Eddie really listened to a thirteen year old and expected the plan to work.

And what's worse, he's the one that had fucked it up and now, he's trapped.

Eddie takes a deep breath through his nose and releases it as slowly as he can through his mouth. It feels as though an elephant is seated on his chest and his lungs can't quite keep up with the weight as his ribcage slowly begins to cave in. 

He has to get out, he has to run, he has to get out, he can't be caught in here, he can't ruin this again.

He starts at a sudden tapping on the window and holds his breath as Steve leans over from the driver's side towards his passenger door.

"Dustin?" Steve huffs as he moves back into place, his arm stops to rest on the passenger door just above Eddie's legs hidden in the darkness of the back seat.

"Steve! I, uh, forgot something, in the back," Dustin's voice is slightly strangled as he stumbles through the explanation for his sudden reappearance, "uh, my backpack!"s in days with their plan in place.

"Okay," Steve says slowly, drawing out the second syllable as he drops his hand from the passenger seat, "let me look--"

"No!" Dustin barks out, leaning further into the vehicle, from the new angle Eddie can see the panic on his young face. 

"Dustin? What--" Steve huffs as the kid climbs back into the front seat, grabbing Steve's arms and forcing him to continue facing forward.

And perhaps it's the absolute ridiculousness of the situation that makes Eddie laugh, the look on Dustin's face, or the confusion in Steve's voice, but he can't help but contain the loud snort that bursts forth from the back seat. 

Shit.

Eddie's heart drops into the floor of the vehicle beneath him as Steve and Dustin both freeze. 

It's like time stands still for an eternity, though snow begins to slowly fall outside the Beemer and the far off buzzing of music and laughter continues to emanate from the school gymnasium. 

Eddie moves first, lifting his hands to cover his face as he slowly sits up. He presses his fingers harshly into his eyes until a kaleidoscope of stars and fireworks appear in the darkness, before lifting them slightly to move into his hair and pulling at the roots. Eddie keeps his eyes closed as he hears a sharp intake of breath and movement from the driver's seat. 

"Eds? Dustin, what is going on, what are you doing here?" Steve says, his voice growing louder with each word until Eddie opens his eyes. 

Steve is staring at him, his large hazel eyes are wide and his brows have pinched in the middle, cutting creases across his forehead. He looks at Dustin before turning back to Eddie again, the frown on his face slowly morphing into a sneer. 

"Figures," Steve breathes out before turning to Dustin once more, "you two planned this?"

Dustin has the decency to at least wince at the accusation, "it's not like that--"

"Just," Steve cuts the kid off, the word harsh, almost a snarl before Steve deflates, sinking back into the driver's seat and letting his head drop back onto the headrest. 

He breathes out long and slow through his nose before continuing in a much softer, tired voice, "go to the dance Henderson". 

Dustin opens his mouth to rail against the dismissal, to stop whatever train of thought has run through Steve's mind, but Eddie beats him to it.

"Dustin," Eddie sighs, dropping his hands away from his hair to his lap, "let me take my lumps man, go".

Dustin makes a noise that seems to be a cross between a curse and a growl, his expression venomous, before he steps back and closes the passenger door with a loud metalic bang.

Eddie vaguely remembers Dustin and Nancy's threat and the guns she supposedly owns and suppresses a shudder. 

One problem at a time.

Eddie hauls himself into the back seat and groans at the rush of pins and needles dotting along his arms as he moves into a normal position once more. He rubs his hands along his arms and legs, wincing at how loud he is in the absolute silence of the car.

Steve isn't looking at him, his face pressed in between his hands at 11 and 1 on the steering wheel. 

"So," Steve mutters after a beat, startling Eddie as he sits back up from the wheel, "you were listening to me. Spying. Again." 

"Steve," Eddie starts, only for the other man to continue on as though he hasn't heard him.

"The only thing I can't figure out is why?"

Steve turns in his seat to look at Eddie, his face carefully blank now but for the slight downward pull at the left corner of his mouth. The bruises from Billy's recent beatings have faded to a sallow yellow and even the collection of cuts from the shattered ashtray have begun to scab over. 

The sight makes Eddie ache.

"Did Tommy put you up to this?" Steve interrupts Eddie's thoughts, his stare unwavering.

"What?" Eddie whispers, horrified, "what are you talking about?"

"You, you keep," Steve's voice rises slightly, a hysterical edge begins to creep in as his breathing quickens, "inserting yourself into my shit, you--I told you that I," Steve swallows heavily and blinks, his hazel eyes shine in the glow of the streetlight.

"Tommy is the only one who knows about me, so--so whatever he's got you doing," Steve sucks in another short breath, it's wet at the edges and Eddie feels his chest tighten as Steve's voice wavers.

"Steve--"

"You know what," Steve hisses as he reaches down to tug the keys out of the ignition, his breathing still slightly erratic, "just don't".

Eddie watches, frozen, as Steve wrenches the driver's door open and throws himself out of the vehicle, slamming the door shut behind him.

Eddie sits in silent shock for a moment, as though his limbs have filled up with sand, holding him in place, before he manages to scramble towards his own door.

"Steve!" He shouts, wincing as he slams the car door behind him, prompting several kids and parents walking into the middle school behind them to look in curiosity.

He catches a glimpse of a maroon sweater darting into the trees. 

Gotcha. 

Eddie hurries after him, cursing Dustin's insistence that, 'with this plan you won't need a coat, there's no waiting outside at all!'

He tamps down the hot feeling of irritation creeping up his chest and into his throat. It's a ridiculous night, first spent crouched into the back of a car and now traipsing through the woods to what? 

Chase after someone who clearly wants nothing to do with him? Who has been purposefully avoiding him since that night in the tunnels. 

Nancy and Dustin had it wrong, this was stupid. 

What was he thinking going along with their batshit plan --not that Nancy deserved credit for the car thing, that was all Henderson. 

Eddie pushes a branch out of his path and steps over a snow covered log, cursing the fact that he can feel the chill creeping into his toes through the thin canvas of his converse sneakers. The shoes also have little traction in the fresh snow that seems to be coming down even harder now as the night goes on.

As if to prove a point Eddie slips on a wet patch of leaves and swears at the sudden pain in his back as he struggles to keep upright.

He's breathing hard, puffs of frozen breath billow out and away from him in the cool night air

'Be gentle with him,' Nancy had said, as if she knew this would happen. As if she knew Steve would run the first chance he could and Eddie would follow.

He shakes his head and takes a deep breath, letting it in and out, allowing the frustration and anger from the last few days flow out with each breath.

"Steve," Eddie shouts as he finally catches a glimpse of maroon and tawny hair through the thicket, "just stop, man!"

Steve halts, halfway over a fallen log, but doesn't turn around.

Eddie ducks under another branch and into the small break in the trees that Steve is in. He can see the way the other man's shoulders rise and fall rapidly in the meager moonlight but whether from panic or exertion, Eddie can't tell.

"Steve," Eddie says as he takes another wary step forward, as though approaching a wild animal.

"You promised we'd talk," Eddie tries to swallow around the sudden lump in his throat, "was that a lie?" 

Steve says nothing still, though he turns his face just enough that Eddie can make out his profile in the low light.

Eddie sighs heavily, sliding a shaking hand through his hair, "what would Tommy want with the town freak anyway, he'd be more likely to put sugar in my gas tank than talk to me about anything, Steve".

"So," Eddie breathes out slowly, feeling his heart rate begin to climb as he prepares to take the leap, "rewind a bit, and catch me up on just what is going on in that head of yours sweetheart".

He sees the moment the words register in the way Steve stiffens, the way he slowly turns towards Eddie, his face pale and his eyes wide.

"You…you've called me that before, in the car," Steve says slowly, in fits and starts, "I thought it was a dream". 

Eddie takes another step closer, watches as Steve traces his movement with wary eyes.

"I think that was the most scared I have ever been in my life Steve, I thought you were dead, and it made me realize something," he swallows heavily, it feels like glass all the way down. 

"I was an idiot," Eddie whispers, his breath floats away in the cold November air as he shivers, "and didn't understand what you were trying to tell me at the Byers".

Steve winces slightly and nods, he opens his mouth to say something but Eddie beats him to it.

"IthinkyourNonnawasontosomethingSteve," the words tumble out in a long nearly unintelligible string, "I want to be in your life, whatever that means, however you'll have me," his lungs stutter slightly as Eddie takes a deep steadying breath.

Steve's head tilts slightly to the left as he regards Eddie with a infuriating black expression, his eyes searching Eddie's own.

"As friends?" Steve says slowly. There's a leading note to his voice that Eddie tries not to wince at.

He can't quite help the way his shoulders drop at the words though. Of course, of course he'd been right the first time. Steve was straight and, despite his better judgment, Eddie had gone ahead and gotten his hopes up for nothing.

"If that's what you want," Eddie agrees, forcing a wane smile that doesn't meet his eyes.

Steve's expression betrays nothing still as he moves through the thicket in two steps, his gaze never wavering from Eddie's own as he crosses his arms over his chest, still guarded despite how close they are.

"And if I wanted something else?" Steve speaks softly now, the words travel in between them through gentle puffs of frozen breath.

They're nearly the same height, Eddie might be a half inch taller or so, but from this close it doesn't matter. 

Eddie can see the flecks of green in his eyes, the collection of freckles and moles across his nose and cheeks; if Steve is an Autumnal King in a sunset, he's absolutely otherworldly in the moonlight. The pale snow falling around them almost makes it seem like he's glowing.

"Glowing huh?" 

Fuck.

Steve's face splits into a soft smile, his eyes crinkle at the corners, pulling at the yellow bruised skin. He breathes out something resembling a laugh through his nose as he says, "well, you're not so bad yourself Munson".

Eddie takes another step closer, his heart racing at a mile a minute, "s'that right?" he asks, lifting his hands to grip at Steve's arms.

He lets his ungloved hands run up and down, reveling at how soft and warm the sweater Steve's wearing is before settling at his elbow.

Steve's eyes slowly trace over Eddie's face, before his expression morphs into the determined one that Eddie recognizes from that horrible night in the tunnels.

"I'm sorry," Steve swallows roughly before clearing his throat. He takes a deep breath and shakes his head as Eddie opens his mouth to speak, "please, just let me explain first, and then you can," he bites at the inside of his cheek as his hazel eyes move beyond Eddie's gaze into the trees. 

"You can, make your decision or whatever".

Eddie hesitates for just a moment, squeezing Steve's arms once more before he lets go. 

Steve gives Eddie a tight smile, before closing his eyes, "I've known Tommy since we were like six, sandbox kids right?"

"Our dads were friends, they worked together, so it just made sense, and we were close, we did everything together," Steve opens his eyes but doesn’t look at Eddie, "Tommy knows a lot about me, stuff I've never told anyone, not even Nance".

Steve sighs, kicking roughly at a cluster of leaves and snow on the ground, "not that she hasn't figured a bunch of it out, she's smart like that". 

"I remember talking about girls for the first time when we were Dustin's age, Tommy had a crush on Linda Holloway, he liked her red hair," Steve smiles faintly, but it quickly disappears as he finally meets Eddie's eyes once more, "and I didn't think anything of it at the time, I just thought we were sharing who we thought was cute so I--"

He stops speaking, his breath stutters for a moment as he shakes his head once and curls his arms even more tightly around himself.

"Steve--" Eddie tries, reaching out once again with one hand before he curls his fingers away as though afraid to touch him. 

Eddie wants to tell Steve that he doesn't need to continue, that he understands, but Steve has regained his voice, soft and unwavering.

"I told him about Mary McKinney, she let me borrow her pencil whenever I needed it and always wore her hair in braids," Steve licks his lips, his eyes flitting between Eddie now and the ground, "and, about Brian Donovan, he was on our little league team and he had the best dimples I'd ever seen".

Steve's lips twist into a shy smile this time as he looks at Eddie, "maybe second best now".

Heat rises in Eddie's cheeks, his heart thrums in his chest and he can't stop the pleased grin from taking over his face at the words. 

God, he's so fucked.

Steve continues on, if he notices Eddie's blush in the low twilight he doesn't mention it.

"Tommy said that was weird to think of boys like that, the same way I thought about Mary, and not to talk about it again. That didn't stop him from bringing it up after that," Steve sighs heavily now, "I couldn't so much as make eye contact with another guy at school without Tommy telling me off". 

Anger ignites in Eddie's chest, spreading up his throat and curling around his hands which suddenly long to meet Tommy Hagans stupid face. 

He'd never cared for the guy. Too far up his own ass over the years with a mean streak a mile wide. Add to that a penchant for making other kids' lives absolutely miserable and you have a recipe for a douchebag that Eddie based nearly half of the Munson Doctrine on. 

The other half, well, that had also been influenced by Steve, but if Eddie was being honest, he had no clue who the real Steve Harrington was. 

No one did. 

Hopefully, in time, Eddie could change that. 

"I'm sorry for not trusting you," Steve whispers, his face tipped down to the ground, "I think I've had his voice in my head for so long that I couldn't stop myself from listening to it".

"You want to know the worst part?" Steve asks quietly, he scoffs, not bothering to wait for Eddie to reply, "he acted like he was doing me a fucking favour, like he was protecting me". 

He shakes his head, lifting a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose as his voice wavers suddenly, "maybe he was, in his own way--"

"Nope," Eddie barks out, startling them both with the sudden volume filling the trees, "that rat was trying to save his own skin by trying to control you, you owe Tommy nothing". 

Steve looks at Eddie with wide shocked eyes. He's standing so still that Eddie wonders if he's stopped breathing.

"Maybe he thought he was doing you a favour," Eddie laughs, it's a cold bitter thing that hangs low amongst the tree roots and plant litter, "and in public sure, I get it, but honestly if he could only be friends with this version of you, then he wasn't really ever your friend, Steve". 

"If someone doesn't like you just as you are, then they aren't worth it".

Steve is still staring, he hasn't blinked the entire time that Eddie has been speaking…it's a little unnerving.

"So," Steve asks, hesitantly, halting Eddie's train of thought, "what about you?" 

He's even closer now and, when the hell did that happen.

"Me?" Eddie says faintly, his eyes drop once to Steve's lips, they're slightly chapped but have never looked so God Damn kissable.

Eddie takes a deep breath, and smiles softly as he lifts his hands to grip Steve's elbows once again, squeezing gently before sliding them down to take his hands. 

They're large and warm in his own, callused along the palms from where the nail bat had sat in his hands. Eddie lets his thumbs run along his knuckles, lingering on the healing scabs from his fight with Billy.

"You weren't what I was expecting," Eddie says, watching as Steve's head tilts again at the nonsequiteur, "especially after the party when I tried to give you back your sunglasses".

"You care, about the kids --even when they are being self destructive little shits, about Nancy even though she broke your heart," he traces his thumbs over the tops of Steves hands when his fingers twitch, "and you care about me, enough to put yourself out there even though you had no idea if I felt the same". 

"You are brave, crazy brave to the point where I'm a little worried about why you're so quick to just throw yourself in front of danger, but," Eddie shakes his head as Steve bristles this time, ducking his face away from Eddie's watchful eyes, "we'll unpack that another day". 

He takes a deep breath and slowly lets go of one of Steve's hands, shaking as he reaches up to cup Steve's jaw, tipping his face up until his eyes are level with Eddie's once more.

Steve's hazel eyes trace over Eddie's face, wide and glassy in the moonlight. They are close enough that Eddie can feel the shallow puffs of air against his lips as Steve's breathing quickens.

"Did the doctor say anything about your face," Eddie asks, gesturing at his own with his one free hand, "recovery time?"

Steve shakes his head with a confused frown.

"Good," Eddie takes a deep breath, allowing a wide lecherous grin to bloom, "because I like you, Steve Harrington, exactly as you are, and I'm going to kiss you," he lifts his other hand now to cup the other side of Steve's face, "but I only make it hurt if you want me to, big boy".

Eddie freezes as the words he just said register. 

Oh Fuck.

Who pulls out Big Boy like five seconds after confessing their feelings? 

Eddie groans lowly and shuts his eyes for a beat, only opening them at the tentative sound of Steve's voice.

"Eds," Steve laughs, his face flushed a deep scarlet, giving Eddie a sly smile of his own, "that was really bad, like really bad".

Eddie sighs, embarrassment beginning to curl, hot and heavy, in his chest as he removes his hands from Steve's face, "I know…"

He startles at the feeling of warm fingers wrapping around his own, drawing his hands back to where they had been on Steve's face, "it's a good thing I like you, so you can get more practice".

"Yeah?" Eddie whispers, his voice hoarse as though he can scarcely breathe. He watches as Steve smiles, counting the crinkles at the edges of his eyes and the way his scarlet flush has faded to a soft pink.

He wants to freeze this moment, burn it into his memory so he'll never forget the soft happiness in Steve's eyes.

"Yeah, Eds," Steve breathes against his lips as their noses brush, "exactly as you are".

Eddie's not sure which of them moves first, it's only the faint brush of chapped lips against his own that sets off an unhinged chorus of, 'Kisskissingkisswhatthefuckyou'rekissingSteveHarrington'.

Eddie's fingers tighten against Steve's face before his hands begin to move on their own, one along his jaw until it has wrapped around the back of his head, burying his fingers in thick soft hair. His other hand shifts slightly lower, his thumb presses into Steve's jaw until his head tips back. 

The noise Steve makes against his lips as Eddie moves him sends a thrill down his spine. He feels two hands slide up his chest, over his shoulders, and around his neck as Steve presses himself even closer. Eddie's fingers tighten in Steve's hair, almost involuntarily, as the pulse under his thumb climbs even higher. Eddie hums contentedly and smiles into the kiss.

It's…God.

Kissing Steve is everything he's ever wanted. He tastes like peppermint, like the candy canes Dustin had brought Steve as a thank you for the ride to the dance, and Eddie can't help but wonder if the little shit had done so with this in mind? 

No, nope. Definitely not thinking about that right now.

He tugs his mind away from the thought and opens his lips more to brush against Steve's with purpose, pulling a sweet moan from the other as he nips at his bottom lip.

He pulls back begrudgingly after another moment, relishing the heat, the softness of Steve pressed against him. They're still standing in the middle of the ravine just a few steps from the middle school and it would probably be best to continue this sort of thing in private. 

Eddie shifts away just enough to run the tip of his nose down Steve's own, his heart fit to burst at the soft sigh Steve releases at the touch. His eyes are closed, but from the new blush that has spread from Steve's cheeks, to his ears and all the way down his neck, as well as the soft grin that pulls at his lips, Eddie can tell the feeling is mutual.

Eddie wonders just how many different shades of pink he could make Steve turn? 

A thought for another day, Eddie thinks with a mischievous smirk, brushing his thumb along the crest of Steve's cheek. 

"We should probably get back sweetheart," Eddie murmurs as he reluctantly removes his hands from Steve's face, "I can think of somewhere warmer we can go to talk". 

Steve nods with a snort, knocking his shoulder into Eddie, "talk huh?" 

"Is that not what the kids call it these days?"

Eddie drapes his arm around Steve's neck, tugging the other man closer. He comes all too willingly with a pleased grin stretched across his face.

"Besides," Eddie hums as they begin to make their way back the way they came, "my Uncle Wayne's been asking about when he can meet you --well after he weaseled it out of me, what was making me mope so much these last few weeks, he's already making Thanksgiving plans--"

They jerk to a halt, half slipping in the leaves and snow, he turns to Steve to meet his wide fearful eyes.

"You--your uncle knows, about me, about you?" Steve asks, the words stopping and starting as he speaks. 

Eddie reaches out only for Steve to take a step back into the trees, "why would you tell him--"

"He doesn't know about you specifically, Steve, I would never do that," Eddie insists, he keeps his voice level now with how close they are to the school again, he can hear the sounds of teens yelling and laughing in the short distance.

"Okay, but he, he doesn't care about…"

Steve trails off, his teeth closing down on his bottom lip and though chewing on what he wants to ask.

Your uncle doesn't care about you being gay, being different?

Eddie sighs, resisting the urge to lift his hands and press his fingers into his eyes, "Uncle Wayne took me in a few years ago when my parents kicked me out for that so, no, it's pretty safe to say he doesn't".

"Oh," Steve says faintly. His arms come up around his chest as he begins to hunch in on himself yet again.

Well shit. 

Now, Eddie isn't a hundred percent certain, but based on things that Steve has said, the warning that Nancy gave him, and what happened at the hospital, he knows that the Harrington house hasn't been the happy home he had assumed it to be.

And now, given the stricken look on Steve's face and the pinch in his gut, the doubts are fading even further away. 

Eddie takes a deep breath, stepping onto the tightrope between them, he'll have to be careful about how he plays this, or Steve could bolt again. He's seen Steve run track at school, he knows the other man could easily outrun him.

Best not to give him a reason to.

"You know, not all parents, um, deserve to be parents sweetheart," Eddie says slowly, carefully, watching Steve's face as he speaks, "especially if they're never around".

He feels the rope between them wobble as he takes a step closer, holding out his hand.

"Especially if they don't love us for who we are Stevie," Eddie whispers, watching as Steve looks away sharply, his shoulders tense.

Eddie takes another deep breath before taking the leap, hoping that his feet will meet the ground beneath them.

"Wayne isn't like that, he's safe, and he wants to meet the person I've been mooning over for weeks now, if you're up for it". 

Steve swallows once, twice, his jaw moves as though grinding what he wants to say between his teeth, his nose begins to redden as his eyes grow damp at the edges.

"Yeah," he manages to choke out, his voice cracks down the center as he draws one hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, "maybe not, right, right now but --fuck, I'm sorry, I don't know why this keeps happening".

Eddie takes the last step and pulls Steve into his arms again; he stiffens at first before finally relaxing, almost boneless, against Eddie's chest. He feels Steve release a long hitching breath and squeezes him gently, rubbing his cheek against the slight stubble on Steve's own.

"Probably because it's been a really hard couple of weeks sweetheart," Eddie pulls back enough to look into Steve's eyes, they're red rimmed now and his lashes have begun to clump together, but even like this Steve still looks beautiful.

"Yeah," Steve says, he sniffs, wincing at the sound of his stuffy nose, "I think I could use a proper…talk, and a rest, if you're still up for it?"

Eddie feels a smile pulling at his lips as incandescent happiness glows in his chest. He pulls Steve closer once more, relishing the feeling of being able to hold Steve again, without the scent of blood and terror in the air. 

"Lead the way then sweetheart," Eddie says softly, knowing he'll follow Steve wherever he goes. There's a lot more for them to talk about, but for now, he'll be there for Steve as his person, for as long as he can. 

Forever if he can swing it. 

Tag List:

@eriquin @luvinthefreaks @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @ellietheasexylibrarian @bambibiest @sadboislovebeans @howincrediblysapphicofyou @coleys-a-nerd @whycantiuseunderscore @airconditioning123 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @corrodedbisexual @starman-jpg @ilovecupcakesandtea @yoriposts @clumsiluni @pelinelin @phantomcat94 @lololol-1234 @anaibis @steveshairspray @hellfireone @eddielives1986 @sunswathe  @tentativeghost @robin-not-batman @estrellami-1 @manda-panda-monium @tinyplanet95 @perseus-notjackson @queenie-ofthe-void @rainbowsaw @sp0o0kylights @littlebluejane @hi-im-eff  @phantypurple @just-ladyme @thoroughlycollected @justrandomfandomstm @swimmingbirdrunningrock @finntheehumaneater @dynamic-powerm@nightmareglitter @genderless-spoon @zaddipax @thebiblesays @pyrohonk @emly03 @geekymagicalpotato @sidebarre @lemon-astra @cipounette @discreetapple @starlitlakes @saphhicwitchbitch @marvel-ous-m @lingeringmirth @honorarybrit81 @bookbinderbitch @finntheehumaneater  @lololol-1234 @eddie-munsons-missing-nipple @monsterloverforhire @gaydrieeen @starlight-archer @homosexual-having-tea @devondespresso @rennnnon @my-hyperfixations-hell-blog @carlprocastinator1000 @0o-queendean-o0 @emly03 @paintsplatteredandimperfect @louismeds @fruitmix

@lizzicleromance @fairy-princette @eddiethehunted

And a few people I think may be intersted!

@steddierthings @steddie-there @stevesbipanic @henderdads @bramble-berries @flowercrowngods

#season two halloween au #stranger things #stranger things season 2 au #steve harrington #eddie munson #the party #steve and nancy breakup #eddie is having all sorts of complicated feelings about steve here #i will never get tired of halloween party aus #you can pry them from my cold dead fingers #afewproblems writes #pining Eddie #nancy and eddie need to hang out more #I tried to give nancy some nuance here because I do love her character and I almost never write her #she was a fun challenge #nance scheming with eddie to get her ex a boyfriend #its messy but in the best way #Nancy Dustin and Eddie are their own group now the Scheme Squad #Steve needs a hug and gets one at last #this have everything #its got whump and pining and love confessions and kisses #happy endings at last

[lord-squiggletits]

The reason this fandom hates IDW Optimus isn't because he's a cop (plenty of people are fine with Prowl) or because he's a bastard (most characters in IDW are) but because he commits the crime of being an actual person who's messy, flawed, and makes a shitload of high stakes mistakes fitting for the intense situations and pressure he's put under constantly.

But we can't have Optimus actually react to his situations by lashing out or being unpleasant, no, he has to have the personality of a cardboard cutout of G1 whose only defining personality traits are "dad, funny, nice," and if he ever vents negative emotions it can only ever be #relatable depression or him being sad on his own without ever letting it show during the important parts of the story. If Optimus dares do things like be angry or frustrated or bitter it's just a sign that he's a bastard and LITERALLY the worst Optimus ever. If Optimus ever makes mistakes or does wrong things in the heat of anger/frustration/stress it's because he's just an evil bastard with no redeeming traits.

God forbid Optimus go through an unending gauntlet of war, politics, atrocities, near-complete loneliness, and a seemingly endless cycle of violence for his entire life and come out of it kind of bitter, angry, and tired of dealing with people's shit. He's not allowed to be a realistic person, context doesn't matter, sympathy doesnt matter. IDW Optimus doesn't fulfill the fandom's fantasies of Father Figure or Perfect Cultural Icon or Twinky Fucktoy and since that's the only reason most people care about Optimus in general, the fandom collectively trashes on IDW OP.

All because he can't fit into the overly simplified and childlike double standard the fandom has where if any other character is messy and flawed, that's good writing and interesting and compelling, but if OPTIMUS is messy and flawed, he's Literally The Worst and he's an asshole for no other reason than He Sucks, context be damned

#squiggposting #ive been here too long and seen the same shit too many times #i'm tired of going 'maybe it's just a difference in taste' nope #the issue is literally just double standards and people not reading the text or taking things out of context #and the worst part is if this were just something OP haters did i would get it #after all if you just dont like OP then of course you arent gonna find anything interesting or compelling #but i see this shit from literally other MOP fans who supposedly love M and OP #but their OP takes are shit and i can count the no. of people who write IDW OP on one hand #i kind of thought that at least among other OP fans there would be deeper readings but if anything it's worse #fandom OP content is 50% haha funny dad jokes g1 knockoff OP and 50% yaoi uke twink sad baby OP #so unimaginative. so fucking boring. so immature #to style yourselves some sort of mature TF fans and then viciously reject the One OP who #dared to be written a little darker and more flawed than any others #it's literally just people refusing to give a chance to any nuanced take on OP #they just want him to be There and Nice and for his biggest flaw to be Being Annoying About Equality or something #might delete later might not

[noisytenant]

Being reminded once again that a lot of people have fucking sleeper cell agent triggers that make them instantly fail to see the human being in front of them, regardless of any personal history they have or any rapport. instantly, that person is an Enemy that cannot be reasoned with. Permanent fight or flight.

And that instead of this being seen as, you know, a rather maladaptive attitude to bring to your relationships that will permanently strip you of the capacity to experience full love and companionship, there is a dominant strain of thinking that this is a reasonable, righteous, moral good.

That a "boundary" looks like building an impenetrable wall that nobody can see but you; That conversation, negotiation, and collaboration aren't just avoided--They're treated with contempt. The very notion of trying to understand why another human being that you care about may suddenly act in an unpleasant or even monstrous way is spat upon and trampled underfoot. Complete abandonment is considered a first line of defense rather than a last resort.

I think we all need to do our best to get over this kind of thinking. And I don't mean that we should be push-overs; In actuality, moving away from this kind of rigid "boundary" often means advocating for yourself and fighting for what you think is right. I think we all deserve friends and allies who can compassionately challenge us when we adopt ways of thinking and behaving that hurt others without immediately assuming the worst.

#indexed post #Nothing happened to me specifically just pissed due to events in the orbit #The only qualifier I'll include here is that we have limited energy and this is specifically geared toward people you have a relationship w/ #I think random strangers also deserve respect and compassionbut I'm not taking the time to give it to em. That's another person's problem #Also don't give me any 'yeah except for x' shit. I do think if we were able to perfectly know the heart of a person #and see that they are causing or wish to cause harm and refuse to change course at all #Then yeah sure we can say that there's a hard line #But I think very often peoples' convictions are more complicated and contradictory than they may seem #And we cannot rewrite someone's entire experience and nuance with one data point we arbitrarily decide is 'too far' #Anyways this is just a rant it's not the best thesis or anything but hope it resonates or stirs some thought

[makotonaegiunderstander]

something I’ve been thinking abt is how many people think Makoto is immune to despair. I don’t think he is. I think becoming the ultimate Hope was BECAUSE he felt despair. He wouldn’t have fully reached that point without Junko. Makoto becoming such a beacon was his last attempt to avoid completely falling and it wasn’t because he didn’t feel despair, it was because he was too damn stubborn to allow everything to go to waste and he refused to sacrifice his beliefs for someone else’s. His inner monologue tells me he DID experience the same new low the other suvivors did in the final trial, but at the point where he had the choice to give up and die, he looked at the others and he looked at Junko and he couldn’t allow it to happen, not out of self preservation, but because the idea that Junko would have control over their lives made him FURIOUS. and that utter refusal to die kicked in, wether luck or otherwise, and he made the concious effort for one last push while something in him was breaking. He had to be broken in order for the Ultimate Hope to come through so aggressively, bc it could only exist in the face of the Ultimate Despair. He snapped the same way she did, but in the other direction. In what could have been his final moments he chose to embody everything Junko wasn’t, and every single optimistic and luck fueled ideal in him suddenly charged forward and pushed him. It was a combination of the final straw and a choice. Makoto isn’t immune to feeling despair, he’s just too stubborn to fall into it of his own volition. I think that’s why I like that scene in DR3 so much. People were SO SHOCKED Makoto actually fell for the tape, that he actually became despair for a moment. I saw people getting mad or disappointed, saying it was pathetic and Makoto seemed to fall from some sort of pedestal for them. Honestly part of me wonders if that sort of mentality, which clearly people had in universe, affected Makoto a bit. Like he started to see himself as less of a person, subconsciously. Prompting him to take more risks, less self preservation, act way more bold. It seems he has to be reminded a lot not to put himself in danger by his friends, to not do something too reckless. All over the place I would see in regards to that scene either this frivolous ‘oh this was just angst drama with no meaning behind it’ or ‘he can do better than that. he’s so weak’ or ‘come on, there’s no way he’d fall into despair, he’s the Ultimate Hope!’ This kind of mentality, which was kind of ironic considering Ryota was there the entire time saying the same thing and treating Makoto the same way. Like Makoto was superhuman. Like Makoto didn’t feel despair the same way ‘normal people’ did. In a way that was also how Munakata saw Makoto. Makoto stopped being a PERSON to the world when he became Ultimate Hope, he became a concept, a belief system, much the same way Junko ascended beyond herself. But the difference is that treating Makoto that way is the opposite of the reason Makoto became such a representative for hope. He wasn’t doing something no one else could. He was doing something everyone had the chance to, he just… was a little more optimistic, a little more stubborn, a little more ‘gung-ho’ about things. He just took the lead where no one else did, where no one else knew they even COULD in the face of Junko’s unstoppable force. She had overcome the biggest threats and obstacles in the world, what could one person do? And the answer Makoto found was, anything. Everything. It doesn’t all rest on Makoto, he’s just the one that was inspired to try to do what seemed like the impossible. But as evidenced by the change in his friends after that trial, it’s clearly not something only Makoto is capable of. The others pulled out of despair thanks to Makoto, but it was their choice to do so.

“But… this world is so huge, and we’re so small. What can we do…? No, we can probably do anything. Yeah! We can do anything!”

#makoto naegi #Danganronpa character analysis #Danganronpa #danganronpa thh #danganronpa future arc #I fucking love Makoto Naegi man. #I think there’s a fine line of nuance to Makoto that’s easy to miss bc he doesn’t really make it known #he’s not a pushover and he’s not overpowered. he’s a people pleaser but he will say what needs to be said #he’s an immovable object and the exact opposite of Junko but he’s also just a normal guy who’s optimistic and (un)lucky #he isn’t invincible but he has immense power to his words the same way Junko did #if anything his superpower is being kind above all else. he’s compassionate to some of the worst people in the world. #he was even conpassionatr to an extent to Junko. he didnt want her to kill herself despite everything she’s done #and he still acknowledges that for years she was a classmate and friend. #I do think the more he learned abt what she did the more he’s come to actually hate her though #post the first game he always refers to her without a suffix to her name which is one of the most subtle rude things you can do #it means you have zero respect for the person you’re referring to #and he speaks about her with some venom he doesn’t use for anyone else in the future arc #he’s not incapable of feeling negative emotions #I really liked the future arc scene bc it showed that Makoto DID experience enough despair to have overcome him if he didn’t refuse #and that it still affects him deeply. people treat him like he’s either this perfect ideal Chad or this baby chick who’s so delicate #and no one really focuses on how makoto shoulders so much and yet is still vulnerable. #honestly that guy was DUE for a mental breakdown even without the tape. it would have happened eventually #I actually wrote one based on him finally hitting a breaking point after giving so much of himself away and keeping nothing for himself #that his issues that he shoves down constantly finally can’t be held down anymore. Hajime helps him bc he knows how that feels #it was a LONG time ago that I wrote that but honestly if I can remember where i was going w it I might finish it #it was initially an rp but I could make it a fic #anyway. the point is Makoto is SO much more complex than people give him credit for #the most fundamental thing about him is that he’s normal and that’s ok! that’s what helps him rise!

[ganondoodle]

got visually spoiled on the literally last thing i was still actively missing and working towards in totk but i dont think im gonna like it anyway ...

if it is what i think it is, and what it looks like to be, its just yet another nail in the coffin (or however you say that) as to why the lore sucks in this game even tho it had such good setup and so much potential

#ganondoodles talks #totk spoilers #tagging it as such bc im gonna say my current thoguhts about it here #again its just visually and i havent seen the text to it yet #so please dont say anythign about it #but #im 100% certain its the reward for all shrines which i dont have yet #and first of all it looks dumb as shit #and second of all its supposed to be the ancient hero in the tapestry isnt it #the zonau got their grimy hands on that too dont they #the thing that was such a cool mystery all this time got solved just like that isnt it #nintendo saw us theorizing about gan being the ancient hero and thought oh gods now we cant give him nuance quickly invent some zonau excus #however that makes sense since they were supposedly long gone by the time the first calamity happened #which still happened even with the time fuckery going on since the tapestry still exists and the last guardian remains #tho it doesnt look quite like a zonau but more like some creepy ass unholy mix of a lizard and gerudo #im gonna wait with my final judgement since i havent read the text yet #but it for sure isnt motivating me more to get all the last 50 or so shrines #i regret finishing the underground first so much man #all you get is a you did it sticker #literally #should have done the shrines first so at least i couldnt get spoiled on that still #im guessing its funney reference or whatever #some mysteries are better left unsolved #didnt want to rush and get all shrines in a hurry and isntead explore it on my own since the exploring part and world is what i love #aside from the music #but i guess i gotta do that now #actual shrine hutning stream incoming i guess #:/

[angelsdean]

im just saying things this morning but i really do love an insane queerbait over canon-right-out-the-gate “representation” characters with labels slapped on them and playing into the most outrageous stereotypes on purpose with the blandest storylines and boring perfect non-problematique lukewarm love interests. like WHERE is the tension WHERE is the 12 yr slow burn WHERE is the complex layering of Issues and Disorders resulting in the most nuanced bisexual man on television precisely because they never intended him to be queer in the first place but accidentally turned the dial up on their sexist funnyguy ladies man too far that it looped over into overcompensation and their 2005 lol gay jokes kept going on beyond funny and the actorman playing him made Choices like looking flustered, uncomfortable at being called out for being too butch and looking aroused and interested in every man place in front of him but especially thee gay angel to the point where said actor somehow made his EYES DILATE and then they told us WE were insane for seeing all of that and oh they started writing it as a romance anyway but were thwarted by the network and others over and over and well anyways, it’s just so delicious and fun but maybe that’s just bc i love theories and puzzles and figuring stuff out and putting things together and connecting dots and also my headcanons and opinions are more important than anything canon could say so idc if i get queerbaited for 50 yrs i’m on another level of existence, living gloriously in the subtext and knowing the Truth. anyways there will never be another ship like destiel 

#like if you give me two characters right off the bat as say they're Gay and Bi and push them together right away #without building their chemistry without building their relationship and you tell me THESE TWO are TOGETHER #well. im just gonna start shipping two other characters that are more interesting complex and have looked at each other longingly #the beauty of characters starting off unlabeled and seemingly 'straight' is they get richer inner worlds they get richer characterization #and THEN. they fall in love with someone of the same gender and THEN. they get labels if they want them #im not saying there shouldn't be canon queer characters off the bat either but. we need some nuance and also variety #like you can have those characters (and make them interesting and give them complex relationships w actual chemistry !!) #and we can also have the deans of the world. characters that the general audience don't see as anything but straight #but is queercoded so other queer ppl SEE there's more going on under the surface #and then some many seasons later it's like oh. oh this man likes men !!!!! #and ideally a canon coming out / reciprocated love confession *cough cough* #like they tried !!!! they considered it !!!! thee market research !!!! #anyways. insane morning i'm having idk thinking abt too much #vic.txt

[thelaurenshippen]

Can you tell me if Bridgewater is a struck show? Or could we ask Misha about it at a convention? I’ve had two people tell me different things so I’m unsure.

hey!! as far as I understand the SAG strike rules (as a SAG actor myself) I don't think Bridgewater counts as a struck show.

I've seen a lot of confusion/misinformation on tumblr about this, so I'm gonna take this opportunity to quickly explain the rules as they've been communicated to me as both a SAG actor and a producer of SAG podcasts.

the current SAG strike is for the TV/film contract, which means that struck work includes all television and film, whether on-camera or voice acting. there have been interim agreements issued to certain studios that allow actors to work and promote their work, but in general, actors are not allowed to do any TV or film work, including promotion!

however, this strike does not apply to other contracts that aren't TV/film. these contracts include: podcasts, video games, commercials, audiobooks, and others (though SAG is voting on striking video games at the end of this month). any work done under those contracts can be promoted!

SAG has great infographics on all of that here. now, there is a gray area that comes up when we consider struck companies. this is a term I've seen a lot in conversations around the WGA strike, where we use it to refer to companies like disney, netflix, paramount, etc. etc. - companies that we're striking against entirely, regardless of medium. that has been the spirit of solidarity in the wga audio alliance - even though fiction podcasts can be worked on during the strike, we're not working with companies that are being struck against, which includes even meeting with those people. though there hasn't been specific discussion around this from the union directly, I have personally extended this to the SAG strike - for instance, I made a show for netflix a few years back and have a tumblr ask sitting in my inbox about it and won't answer until the strike is over!

so, my logic: Bridgewater is under a SAG podcast contract and is a production of Grim & Mild and iHeart, neither of which are struck companies for either SAG or the WGA (unless I'm seriously out of the loop on something). I can't speak to what Misha will feel about it, but I'm certainly happy and comfortable to talk about Bridgewater.

I hope that answers (perhaps over answers!) your question! if you go to a convention, say hi to Misha for me!

#bridgewater #sag strike #hollywood strikes #union stuff #sag actor #answered #there's more nuance and complication around some of this in audio specifically #like if we need to strike against audible (bc they're owned by amazon) #and there's not a consensus on that! #so please give grace and patience to any actors you see promoting stuff not tv/film #don't automatically assume they're crossing a picket line! #this stuff is NOT as clear as it might seem from the outside

[potatochip-oc-dump]

what if we were both lonely

#oc #marolyne castelle #princess mom #moonlight #moonmary #can i. make up canon ship names for my ocs. can i do it for fun. please #what if we were both lonely and i was a woman and you were an infinetly expanding shadowy mass; an eldritch being #i cant believe theyre a thing but theu are. in some sense. not only because its incredibly fun concept but also because #it also works really well for the story. and it just hapoened to work out thag way #im giving mary a lot more love in these new plot ideas im having ... #shes more nuanced. less “evil queen neglectful parent” #ill talk about my new ideas sometime when i get the chance #ive been rewriting gidget too... ive realized i think her character was going in a direction i dodmt want it to #ill tell you all about it sometimes #*sometime

[rawliverandgoronspice]

You know what I would have loved in an alternate TotK with a more nuanced story and a more nuanced Ganondorf, though? For him to still transform into a dragon, but only after his last boss phase. And then, *as the lore of the game stipulates like three times over* (and then constantly contradicts and ignores even though it was the only thing that had lasting consequences ANYWAY), he actually does lose himself.

Like he's just gonna be an immortal dragon now, letting go of his consciousness and goals but still refusing to be erased. And so you'd have a postgame Hyrule where he's just, chilling in the air alongside Dinraal, Farosh and Naydra, and nobody can do shit about that.

It's just where he is now!

Anyway, I have finished Tears of the Kingdom.

#totk #totk spoilers #ganondorf #like he doesn't even attack you he just gives you passive gloom damage if you get too close #but like wouldn't that be the most passive agressive shit #and by extension the most ganondorf thing to do in that situation #maybe he gets back into bossfight mode during blood moons as a postgame boss fight treat or something #but I don't know I think it could have been both very funny and a little tragic #I think I'll whip out a more nuanced review at some point where I actually talk about what I liked too #but ughhhHHH the narrative part is so frustrating and so hard to ignore

[welcometoteyvat]

jing yuan and yanqing are giving zhongli and xiao if the latter’s canon relationship was Actually fanon’s made up father figure/adopted child dynamic

#idkkkkkkkkkkkkk who looks at zx and is like 'you know what. this is a healthy parent child relationship' #like girl by fitting them into father son boxes you are actively making their relationship imbalance Worse #if you do that and dont shy away from it i respect that but if you say dad/son makes their relationship more wholesome or whatever like WHY #now i wont deny shippers might do that too but i see the dad son version so much i think im just averse to it by default #also because i think father son makes people actively Try to make their relationship something that its not and it erases a bunch of subtlet #subtleties in it. it's the nuanced r/ship -> entirely unproblematic and flavorless r/ship that i hate #also the number of people who'll block if you ship zx. like damn thats crazy you guys really think theyre father son (fake)??? #at their peak they're like. 4000 year old guys who have too much history and repression and some weird entanglement of 'nah im bothering him #too much' and 'gotta protect him w my life' complexes. and then this devolves into theyre never gonna kiss until 3000 more years have passed #listen they just Contain Multitudes idc if you dont ship it just dont make it into dad and son and we will be so gucci #jing.yuan and yanqing are like different i think mostly bc yanqing is actually like a minor and jing yuan is also a normal ish person #plus the light cone and the abouts?? yeah this is an actual like adopted parent/child thing #also good or bad news i caved and am now playing hsr. the plan is to pull yanqing and then go on infinite hiatus in the game 👍 #JWKFLJWEK i dont think theres really any draws for me besides him. personally neutral on turn based combat and the open world isn't giving #the only saving grace i have rn is 1) ive gotten to the part where bron.seele is real and man theyre gay 2) trailblazer trio 3) tall female #mc 4) everyone has way better emoting abilities than genshin 5) su.shang's really cute <3 #the story doesnt really interest me though its like cool but not mindgrippingly interesting #tbf i think genshin is the same way storyline wise (at the beginning) but the difference is that turn based combat isnt really my thing LMAO #ramblings! #zhongxiao #if you want to filter it out ??

[afewproblems]

Season Two Halloween AU Part Nine

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six Part Seven Part Eight

Synopsis: What if Eddie had been at Tina's Halloween Party in Season Two? Featuring Steve!Whump, Stancy Breakup, and Eddie just trying to keep up with all these new revelations about who King-Steve actually is...

As always, thank you thank you to the lovely Jess @strangersteddierthings for cheering me on, letting me send spoilers, and Steddie screaming with me!

***

Eddie moves, trying to find a comfortable position in the firm plastic hospital chair, letting his legs stretch out into the bulk of the hallway and sliding down the chair. 

He won't be able to stay like this for much longer either, but it's worth it for the irritated looks he can feel from the nurses station.

Eddie hadn't been allowed in the room with Steve while he was being assessed, forcing him to wait outside in the hallway.

He can hear them talking, not bothering to be quiet at four in the morning.

"There's no answer, who isn't home at this time of night?"

"Did you try the secondary number?"

"Yes, it's for a business though and all I get is the answering machine for a Richard Harrington". 

Eddie frowns, silently agreeing with the first nurse, why the hell aren't they here?

That's when he remembers something Steve had mentioned, so casually, Eddie realizes, feeling a little sick, that his parents wouldn't be home until Thanksgiving this year. 

Which is just shy of a month away still, give or take a week.

Just how long have they been gone, he wonders, feeling an anxious pit begin to form in his stomach, and what would that mean for him now?

He's saved from this train of thought for the moment by Hopper appearing at the end of the hall, his heavy step and squeaky boots announcing themselves well before he steps into view. 

He looks exhausted, and a little worse for wear, and Eddie has never been happier to see a cop.

He walks past Eddie, though he does spare him a single nod, and makes his way to the nurses station. 

"Morning," Hopper says gruffly, his voice crackles as though it's either been used too much or too little recently.

"'M'here about the Harrington kid, we have a few questions for him and his injuries and then I'll be taking him home after his statement".

"Sir, that's not--" one of the Nurses tries, only for Hopper to flash his badge and knock his knuckles once on the top of the desk.

"Which room?" He at least has the decency to ask this time, throwing a thumb over his shoulder. 

Eddie hears a long sigh as the other Nurse mutters, '206'; Hopper doesn't even wait for her to finish the word before he's turning on his heel, his boots making a horrible squeak against the linoleum tiles as moves. 

He slows to a stop in front of Eddie, finally looking at him, it's always been nerve wracking having the chiefs full attention on him, though there's a rather big difference between now and the last time, down at the station.

"They check you out?" He grumbles to Eddie, his fingers tap a nervous rhythm on his leg.

Eddie shakes his head, "Steve took the brunt of everything tonight". 

Hopper nods, his gruff face pinched with something close to worry, but it's gone in an instant.

He looks down the hall at something over Eddie's shoulder and lifts his hand in a muted wave before turning back to Eddie.

"You should head home Munson, I took the liberty of getting you a ride".

Eddie frowns at the words and startles slightly as another person sits down beside him, he hadn't even noticed until Wayne was all of a sudden right there.

Eddie blinks, exhaustion and emotion all encompassing; he feels as though he might sink into the floor or tip forward and fall away from the world right then and there, but Wayne reaches out, clasping his shoulder with his firm warm hand. Like he always does.

"Wayne," Eddie says in a tremulous voice, the weight of the night finally crashes over him, the dogs, Billy, the tunnels, it's too much. The image of Steve crumpling to the floor, shards of ceramic in his hair, plays over and over again.

Eddie's face is wet as Wayne pulls him into his arms, he ignores the way the hospital chair digs into his ribs as he moves.

"S'okay Ed," Wayne whispers, letting his hand rub soothing circles on his back, up and down.

Wayne says something above Eddie's head, most likely to Hopper, but he doesn't care, not now. He focuses on the grounding feeling of being held, the warm comfort of knowing that when he needed it, his uncle was there. 

He tries not to think about the fact that it's Hopper in Steve's room rather than his parents. 

***

They don’t talk after. 

It shouldn’t have been surprising really. After the whirlwind in the tunnels, learning that Dustin really had managed to bond with one of the creatures over a mediocre chocolate bar, and finally, finally, getting Steve to the hospital, it was like everything else was put on the back burner. 

The government gives them all NDAs to sign, including Wayne now --how was he not going to tell his uncle after the hospital? The government officials had given Eddie a bit of trouble about it during the debrief about their cover story, until Wayne and Hopper had argued his defense. 

The worst part though, about everything, is the pretending. 

Pretending that everything is normal, like there aren't monsters from an alternate dimension running around Hawkins, like the government didn't know about the real reason so many people, like Mr.Newby, had died. Pretending that small petty things like his late homework assignments, or who was dating who in the wilds of Hawkins High really mattered. 

With that being said, the news that Nancy Wheeler and Jonathan Byers were officially dating now, surged through the school. 

Pretending that that news doesn't make Eddie feel relieved was also difficult.

Well, maybe relieved isn't the right word, but after Eddie's half-assed confession before the tunnels, and the stay in the hospital, Steve has been avoiding him. 

And if it wasn’t because of Nancy….

Well, Eddie tries not to dwell too much on it.

Two weeks after their trip into the Dismal Caverns, Eddie spots, speak of the devil, Nancy Wheeler leaning on his locker.

The last bell has long past so it's only the stragglers now wandering halls, those waiting for Band Practice to start, those just getting out of detention. 

Three guesses which one he's here for. 

Eddie hasn't seen or spoken to Nancy since their government meeting, not that either had been particularly chatty that night, but she had at least sent a grateful smile Eddie's way as one of the officials went through the whole story of that night.

So to see her now sets his teeth on edge and his stomach plummeting into his shoes.

Is it back, did something happen to Will, did another Demodog surface?

Is Steve okay? 

As if Nancy can see the terrified questions swirling around his head, she raises the hand not holding her books to her chest and says lowly, "everyone's fine". 

Eddie lets out the breath he's holding, trying to lower his heart rate, "haven't seen you around these parts Wheeler, don't tell me you need a pick me up?"

He tries for a swarthy smile but it falls flat as the adrenalin from his earlier panic is still running rampant, he runs a sweaty hand through his hair, trying to hide the slight shake.

Nancy rolls her eyes and pushes herself off the locker by her shoulder, tipping her head towards the far back door to the building. 

She says nothing as she leads him out of the school and towards his usual picnic table in the trees.

Eddie tugs his leather jacket around his torso as a harsh November breeze kicks up dead leaves and dust around the school building in small whirls. He wishes in this moment he had found a zip up closure rather than one with button snaps.

Eddie laughs nervously as they enter the treeline, "uh huh, you sure you didn't want something?"

Nancy turns to sit on top of the table, her face impassive, "Mrs. Click was still there, in her room, I don't need to have any meetings with her and my parents because they think I'm being corrupted," she lifts her hands and makes exaggerated quotations with her fingers before rolling her eyes again. 

"We can talk here," she says primly, setting her books down on the table beside her. 

Eddie grins, "you're probably setting yourself up for a meeting with the counselor tomorrow anyway, walking out of the school with me".

He kicks at a bottle cap in the grass and watches as it tumbles a few feet away. When he looks back up, Nancy is staring at him with a pinched brow.

"I'll bite, what's going on?" 

Nancy nods and it's like a switch flips, her spine straightens slightly and her shoulders square before a determined expression smoothes out her face, it's eerie how similar it is to Steve's.

"What is he to you?" Nancy asks, 

"Who?" Eddie stumbles over the word, already knowing exactly who Nancy is asking about.

She looks around now, prompting Eddie to do the same, just in case.

"I know it isn't," she hesitates for a beat as though searching for the word, "safe to talk about it, but," she blinks once, twice, "that's part of why I'm here, asking". 

"I won't see Steve get hurt, not again". 

"So," Nancy stands now, gracefully rising to her feet and stepping off the table, she takes a step closer towards Eddie, "what is he to you?"

He has a good five or six inches on her at least but the fire in her blue eyes makes him feel so much smaller in this moment. 

Eddie feels a snarl build in his chest, the words tumbling out before he can get a chance to really think about them.

"That's fucking rich coming from you, as though you didn't rip his heart out at that stupid Halloween party". 

Nancy's face pales slightly, but there's blood in the water now.

He never really had the heart to ask Steve this question, and he probably never would have been able to actually answer it. 

But Nancy can. 

"Steve is brave, fucking reckless but he's brave, and selfless, and he cares so much --about everything,"

Eddie forces himself to stay where he is, to not move, but his voice climbs in volume, carrying through the trees. 

"You had that and you threw it away Wheeler, and you come in here asking what he is to me?"

He watches as Nancy looks around them frantically watching for people, but Eddie doesn't care, he keeps going.

"He's more than some bullshit you toss in the trash".

There are twin spots of red on the high points of her cheekbones, matching the flush painting her ears, Nancy pins him with a frosty glare as she breathes out slowly through her nose.

"Well, you certainly care, don't you, that's a question answered at least".

She clears her throat and blinks again, and to Eddie's horror, her eyes shine with tears in the afternoon sun. 

"You don't know what it was like after everything last year, how hard it was".

She wipes roughly at one of the tears that rolls down her cheek, cutting it off.

"I wanted to talk about it, I wanted to tell Barb's parents what happened to their daughter, my--"

Nancy swallows roughly, her nostrils flaring, "my best friend, was dead". 

"And Steve wanted to pretend that everything was fine, that it was normal," she clears her throat and wipes at her eyes again, "and I can't do that, I don't have it in me to let it go yet". 

Eddie nods, he gets it.

He didn't understand how everyone was able to just go on like everything in the last week didn't happen, or if he will ever forget the sounds those things made as they screamed in the darkness, that people had died that night. 

He can't pretend either and it's a relief to know he isn't the only one.

Eddie opens his mouth to apologize but Nancy keeps going, her words softer this time.

"I don't really believe that Steve has been able to let it go either if I'm being honest," Nancy says, her eyes searching Eddie's face as she speaks, "he sleeps with the hall lights on, did he tell you? He can't stand the dark anymore". 

"Yeah," Eddie breathes out, "he's said it before, I didn't know about the hall, but.."

He lets the thought trail off, it makes sense. It's not as though he's been sleeping well since everything ended either. Wayne had woken him up that first night to stop his screaming and calm him down, he ended up crawling in with Wayne for the rest of the night, something he hadn't done since he was eight.

Eddie startles slightly at the sudden small hand touching his arm. Nancy pulls back almost immediately at his flinch, regret painting her face.

"Steve needs something that I can't give him,"   and I need more than he can give me, it wasn't meant to last". 

"I didn't mean to hurt him, but that doesn't mean I'm good with Steve getting hurt again and again, he has enough of that with his parents".

Eddie nods again, "have they always been like that?"

Nancy's face darkens for just a moment before smoothing out again.

"In the year we were together, I met them once," she wraps her arms around herself and shivers as another breeze rips through the clearing, "he always made excuses for why they were gone or when they would be back".

She looks up at Eddie now, her wide blue eyes still red rimmed from earlier, "he told me about you, that night". 

Oh. 

Suddenly the weighted looks Nancy had been giving him make more sense. The small conspiratorial smile.

"Yeah well, he's been avoiding me," Eddie admits softly, lifting his hand to snag a lock of hair, "so I wouldn't hold your breath".

Nancy nods and shivers against a rough gust of wind that shifts the trees and swirls the leaves around the table. She looks into the distance suddenly, her eyes catching something behind Eddie as they widen before darting back to his face.

He turns his head to look behind him, only to see Hawkins Middle through the trees.

"Steve's good at pretending, but he doesn't have the same kind of friends around him that would just accept that version of him now, he's got us --well," Nancy stutters momentarily, "he's got you, and the kids, I'm pretty sure Dustin thinks Steve's an action here now".

Eddie snorts, prompting a smile out of Nancy. He takes a small step forward before offering his elbow. Nancy looks from his arm to Eddie's face once before reaching out to curl her hands around it.

"Alright Wheeler," he says with a grin, "how do we do this? I know you've got a plan rolling around that brain of yours and I'm cold as shit so let's move this to the van".

Nancy smiles again, tilting her head towards the Middle School once more, "How do you feel about Dances?"

Tag List: Please Note the List is Officially Closed

@eriquin @luvinthefreaks @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @goodolefashionedloverboi @ellietheasexylibrarian @bambibiest @sadboislovebeans @howincrediblysapphicofyou @coleys-a-nerd @whycantiuseunderscore @airconditioning123 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @corrodedbisexual @starman-jpg @ilovecupcakesandtea @yoriposts @clumsiluni @pelinelin @phantomcat94 @lololol-1234 @anaibis @steveshairspray @hellfireone @eddielives1986 @sunswathe  @tentativeghost @robin-not-batman @estrellami-1 @manda-panda-monium @tinyplanet95 @perseus-notjackson @queenie-ofthe-void @rainbowsaw @sp0o0kylights @littlebluejane @hi-im-eff  @phantypurple @just-ladyme @thoroughlycollected @justrandomfandomstm @swimmingbirdrunningrock @finntheehumaneater @dynamic-powerm@nightmareglitter @genderless-spoon @zaddipax @thebiblesays @pyrohonk @emly03 @geekymagicalpotato @sidebarre @lemon-astra @cipounette @discreetapple @starlitlakes @saphhicwitchbitch @marvel-ous-m @lingeringmirth @honorarybrit81 @bookbinderbitch @finntheehumaneater  @lololol-1234 @eddie-munsons-missing-nipple @monsterloverforhire @gaydrieeen @starlight-archer @homosexual-having-tea @devondespresso @rennnnon @my-hyperfixations-hell-blog @carlprocastinator1000 @0o-queendean-o0 @emly03 @paintsplatteredandimperfect @louismeds @fruitmix

@lizzicleromance @fairy-princette @eddiethehunted

And a few people I think may be intersted!

@steddierthings @steddie-there @stevesbipanic @henderdads @spooky-brakers

Part Ten Now Up (Final Part)

#season two halloween au #stranger things #stranger things season 2 au #steve harrington #eddie munson #the party #steve and nancy breakup #eddie is having all sorts of complicated feelings about steve here #i will never get tired of halloween party aus #you can pry them from my cold dead fingers #afewproblems writes #pining Eddie #uh oh more problems #poor eddie #poor steve #where is robin when you need her #nancy and eddie need to hang out more #I tried to give nancy some nuance here because I do love her character and I almost never write her #she was a fun challenge #nance scheming with eddie to get her ex a boyfriend #its messy but in the best way

[ultimateplaylistmaker]

BASED. Finally someone actually acknowledging Tenko`s sexism and making her overcome it instead of unfunny jokes or ignoring it.

Making unfunny jokes? Lame

Ignoring it? BORING

Having Tenko run a primarily woman's shelter during the literal apocalypse which forces her to see actual genuine families that she in her heart cannot bare to turn away when she has resources to help, forcing her to interact with guys more then she had before and getting to observe them be good people trying to help their mothers and sisters. When clearly troubled by how this is changing her world views a nice older trans lady sees this young teenager trying to help everyone but clearly having gender essentialist views correctly blames her guardian for her teaching her those views then goes over to help/adopt her, slowly working through it and kindly correcting her when she messes up or says something bigoted and while Tenko's progress is slow and she still makes mistakes, a lot of them, its clear she's trying and she's growing and she'll get there one day and you just cant help but be proud of her while Tenko learns to be more then just what her master wanted for her and learns who she is outside this role she was molded into causing her to question herself in ways she never was allowed to before? BASED AS HELL

#my tenko has a very long journey that ends with a very poignant moment where she switches her label from lesbian to sapphic #giving her a sense of nuance and fluidity she felt lacked before in her old label that felt more assigned to her then naturally picked #this is of course not demonizing people who do identify as lesbians kirumi is right there being gay as hell there are several lesbians here #but for TENKO SPECIFICALLY the change is a sign of fluidity and growth learning that things arent always black and white and unbending #i think its really boring to insist tenko has to be a gold star lesbian #i think shes more interesting if she gets a chance to explore her attraction at her own pace even if that means actually giving boys a shot #and if she comes away still unattracted but now more solid that her attraction is just who she is and not who she is made to be thats good #and if she comes away thinking maybe she could theoretically like boys thats fine too! she deserves the chance to find out on her own terms #not her masters terms of isolating her and only exposing her to the worst for some god forsaken reason she deserves to explore herself #gender and sexuality is so much more fun in fanon when you realize its like water to splash around in #ever changing and very stimmy! #ndrv3 #uh oh this got long #anon chaos #my dr lore #tenko chabashira

[gearboxsys]

what happened with eurovision half my non american mutuals r losing their minds please help m

Okay so a little bit of context for anybody unaware - the way Eurovision votes work is that you have the jury vote and the public vote. The jury vote is where Professional Music Experts from all the countries involved give points to the competitor that they want to win, while the public vote is where they average out votes from the audience and give points from that. The jury vote is historically kinda shit and people almost always disagree with it, and often it seems to be politically motivated to some extent as well (if you've seen people talking about "voting for their neighbours", it's because sometimes countries will continuously give points to a neighboring country, it's a whole thing), the public vote is usually a game changer unless there's some massive gaps between competitors from the jury vote.

By far the most popular entry this year was Finland's. You might've seen him around, he's the guy with the lime green puffer jacket that's just the sleeves. Personally his song isn't really my thing but I 100% get the appeal and it definitely deserves the hype. Sweden, on the other hand, had a more contentious entry. Personally I did really like it, but it's not like, a favourite - top 10 but not top 5, y'know? But I've seen a lot of people thinking it was kinda mid too.

The jury gave a lot of points to Sweden. By the time the jury segment was finished, Sweden was in first place by 340 points, a whole 163 points ahead of the second place contestant, while Finland was back in 4th place with 150 points. The public votes came in, and Finland did get a LOT from the public vote, bringing them up to 526 points, but Sweden ultimately won with 583 points, even though they got like 100 less points from the public vote than Finland did. So now people are rioting and are going to explode the jury

#also there has been some Discourse about Israel doing so well (coming in third place) because of all the politics around it #personally I think the issue is a bit more nuanced than people are giving it credit for (folks tend to forget that a country's government- #-is not the same as it's citizens and that the citizens don't exactly have control over what wars and genocides the government decides to- #-commit) but I do see where they're coming from and I don't necessarily disagree #this kinda discourse has been going on for years though you should've seen the most recent year that Israel won (2018 I think? maybe 2019?) #TLDR fan favourite lost to not fan favourite because the jury system is kinda stupid #eurovision #esc 2023

[shrimpmandan]

Ngl I always find it interesting to talk to non-LGBT/non-discourse involved people about LGBT discourse and inter-community politics because there’s very much a noticeable dissonance of “well, this thing doesn’t affect me, so why does it affect you? Why are you bothered by this?” while simultaneously acknowledging that they aren’t involved in the community, and/or community politics.

It’s very easy (and arguably fairly rational) to say people should be able to identify however they want, but it often comes at the cost of ignoring science or incidentally bigoted history. Autistic people being scapegoated by an allistic to “justify” the existence of MOGAI, pansexuality existing as a “replacement” label for bisexuality since either the 1920s or 1930s, the very definition and criteria of gender dysphoria being willfully ignored or changed when the term is already highly inclusive of a variety of different trans experiences, how “gender is all fake bullshit!” can help one trans person and harm another, all of the varying and complex opinions people have on various slurs being reclaimed, I could honestly go on. LGBT people are highly variable in the opinions they can hold and this has been a universal constant truth. The age of the internet has definitely made these politics and discourse more accessible-- as well as opening the door for a whole host of misinformation-- but to act as if community in-fighting and discourse is a recent invention would just be absurd. The issue will always come down to when community politics and discourse distracts from fighting for our actual, tangible rights. If you prioritize identity politics and label discourse over actual people being killed or our rights being under direct threat, then you genuinely need to re-evaluate those priorities. It should also go without saying that other people are not mandated to engage with you and staying in your lane and being reasonably amicable towards things you don’t understand or simply fundamentally disagree with is the mature option in the vast majority of cases.

I have VERY strong opinions about biphobia and bi history, the ableist history of MOGAI, misinformation about gender dysphoria, and the scientific/neurological basis of gender in general. All that can be discussed WITHOUT going out of your way to attack random internet users hoping that they’ll engage you in a discussion you aren’t entitled to. You’re allowed to be frustrated with other members of your own community, but that frustration should never take priority over the rage you should feel towards the bigots in positions of power, nor your ability to evaluate if arguing with a random teen on the internet over their identity is worth it. Trust me LGBT discourse and politics would be so much more fucking productive if it wasn’t a dick measuring contest over who the “real” bigots of the LGBT community are and instigating random strangers, as opposed to, oh I dunno. Posting actual sources pertaining to community history and being open to other perspectives as opposed to being rude and accusatory towards each other? Just a thought.

#lgbt discourse #rambly #neither incluses or excluses are some ontologically evil force can you guys be fucking normal for 5 seconds #nothing in particular really prompted this im just tired and cranky #ngl I think most lgbt topics have more nuance than people give them credit for so I've leaned away from a lot of strictly pro/anti labels #but outright community separatism is killing a LOT of that nuance

[sleepy-stitches]

the everlasting desire to create a gauntlet of a quiz about my interests and then sit my friends down to take it vs the fact i know they would all hate that

#i just think it would be funny. google form with ten different sections of questions #i dont think i would even want it to be multiple choice either. maybe some of them. but i think multiple choice cuts out so much nuance #like is it not infinitely more fun to be able to put in wild guesses. is it not wildly more fun for me to be able to go #ehhhhh close enough ill give you that. sure #the answer is fun for me but i think everyone would hate it #alas #original post placeholder tag

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

Here's an analysis on gonta that I really like

https://www.tumblr.com/unweavinglies/624144216037244928/gonta-gokuhara-character-analysis-when-a-genius?source=share

YES I've seen this analysis around before it's very good. Although I don't necessarily agree with all of it, I really appreciate the depth OP went into with it, its really well written and thought out!

#pluto answers #I kinda disagree about himiko babying gonta in trial 4.. i always interpreted that part as her saying that to herself #that gonta happened to hear (next to her) and got confused that way #Also I feel like ch2 kokichi gonta dynamic is a teensy bit more nuanced than “gonta was completely going along with kokichi” #because yes he was aware and all for kokichi's plan to trade motives #but he did not realize that was happening at the insect meet n greet... and kokichi still said some pretty cruel things about him #to the others there #Its important to me that Gonta is still naive and very implicitly trusting of others which causes him to get fucked over sometimes #And that youre not “stupid” if you dont immediately understand things because youve had no exposure to normal society for 10 years #but they're right that gonta is MUCH smarter than a lot of people give him credit for #so overall. good post