#go on safe mode
slanbitch 2 months ago
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A dumb little comic about zoro's 110 cm of badonkers
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neutralin 2 months ago
Communication 101. How to deal with being ignored
Choosing people with similar communication patterns is a key to long lasting relationship. But we often deal with those who don't reply to our texts or prioritize others over us. Or we occasionally do this to someone.
How to know if I'm not overreacting?
The best piece of advice I can give is trust your gut. If you feel something is off it probably is.
馃毄 If someone intentionally and repeatedly does not reply to your texts or ignore you in real life after an argument, to show how you upset them then you are being given a silence treatment and you are not overreacting if it bothers you. They are practically saying you don't exist to them if you did something they don't like More on topic + when the silent treatment is right to approach
馃毄They prioritize other people over you and only give you excuses
馃毄 They don't show you any signs of affection
馃毄 You don't feel seen and/or hear when you are around them More on topic
馃毄 You constantly feel pushed-pulled by them More on topic
Those are red flags of avoidant behaviour and they shouldn't be ignored no matter if it has been done intentionally or not. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to erase this person from your life ofc
How to know if someone's communication pattern is compatible with yours?
This actually varies from person to person but I listed some things I guess are green flags in most of relationships. Feel free to add your points ofc
-> You don't feel needy when you communicate with them -> You can share a lot without being judged -> They take responsibility for their actions and admit their mistakes -> You feel comfortable around them -> They understand the meaning of the word "NO" and don't pressure you in any way
Anyway, getting back to the core topic of this post.
TRY NOT TO LEAVE PEOPLE ON SEEN. I mean really. it hurts.
(unless they are being mean and disrespectful towards you or people/things you care about. Or if they are acting suspicious. In that case it's totally valid. Ignore and move on. Block or/and report if needed. Save your time and mental health)
-> in other cases someone put the effort and time to contact you, even if they just send some tiktok or post that reminded them of something you like
-> even if you don't like what you texted (only if it's not something offensive, triggering etc ofc) you better say so than leave the person guessing it by themselves
-> ignored messages are triggering for many people and even if they try to heal from their trauma that's basically something no one will like
-> normalize replying with one of these scripts instead of leaving messages on read. I will be glad to see your suggestions!!
"sorry I don't want to answer this question" "I'm really tired rn let's talk about this later" "I'm afraid I can't help you with this matter" "I'll reply when I finish my work" "I need some space. I'll write you when I feel better" "I am not okay with you behaving certain way but I'm not ready to discuss it at the moment"
-> set buffer time. Set boundaries with your friends and colleagues (probably separate the time gaps) so you can function better if too much messages at the same time overwhelm you.
Q: what if I don't want to interact with someone but they keep contacting me?
A: Say so! If you have already decided that you don't want this person in your life then you can either ghost them or explain your point of view and improve your communicating skills while saving someone's time and mental stability (unless they act really weird and cross your boundaries. In that case do whatever you think is suitable to protect yourself from their unhealthy behaviour).
It's okay to realize that you don't want to be someone's friend even if you have been friends for years now. It's okay to cut ties with toxic family members as well. It's about your comfort and mental stability.
Q: What if I don't feel like replying at all?
A: It is important to remember that you don't owe anyone a reply. If you genuinely don't feel like texting back don't force yourself to do so. It's good to let another person know why you don't want to reply to a certain text or interract with them but if you have a bad feeling about it and they were mean to you before maybe it will be best to just let it go as it is and cut off all ties. You should be equally comfortable during any sort of communication with any person so if it takes too much from you at the moment or in general it's your right to deal with it this way.
-> try to ground yourself. Stop assuming the worst and concentrate on the present. Acknowledge the fact that they could forget to reply, have a hard time or suddenly something urgent appeared and required their immediate attention. Don't immediately jump into assumption that it has something to do with you
-> text them explaining how you feel without blaming them. Make them realize that it's hard for you to see your messages being read/seen without any reply or an one-word replies, emoji replies etc or that you want to communicate in more significant way.
-> make an agreement. It they don't value your attempts to communicate with them then making some sort of agreement can possibly change something in their behavior if they really mean to adjust to your needs.
Q: what if they don't want to change their behaviour?
A: acknowledge their style of communicating and move on. They don't like to chat/communicate in your manner? You usually feel as if your needs are not met? Maybe they are not meant for you, really. And yes, it might hurt but it will most likely benefit you in the future by saving your time and mental stability.
Q: what if I feel as if I'm annoying?
A: did you really mean to offense them in any way? Were you really this annoying? Or did you genuinely want to text them and make something clear? Maybe you really want to know how they are doing. Maybe you are the one who cares, not the one who annoys. If you feel as if you are too needy around a certain person maybe they are the one to play cool and push you away. If you feel that way quite often then there can be a lot of causes to that including trauma (especially emotional neglect). Don't be so hard on yourself and slowly start working towards more stable and independent self-esteem. Analyze your circle of friends. Maybe you've surrounded yourself with emotionally distant people and they can't meet your needs.
Q: what if I know they aren't ignoring me on purpose but I can't stop loosing my mind over it?
A: There are people with a strong rejection sensitivity (about it). It's common among neurodivergent people or can be a result of trauma. Learn more about it since it can be the case. Also, learning about cognitive distortions such as black and white thinking, catastrophizing, mind-reading etc can be useful. There are strategies to work with them and you can find plenty of information even here on tumblr. Communication is always the key so talking things out and making the matters clear will certainly calm down your anxiety. Working with a professional such as psychotherapist if you have access to that kind of service will make a huge difference as well.
Hope this helps! Take care! 馃挅馃實
#self care
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mindofmeraki 9 months ago
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- Princess Mononoke (1997)
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ihryss 4 months ago
A gente se esfregando uma na outra, gemidos, beijos atrapalhados com gemidos, prazer... Eu a chupando e a sentindo se tremer, me apertar, excita莽茫o....
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conclush a month ago
Promise part.ii
pairing . 执 嗉 藮 士 执侄指 讋 Thena x GN!Reader
summary . 执 嗉 藮 士 执侄指 讋 After not seeing each other for many years, You've seen each other eternals but they were shocked to find out what have been happened to you.
warning . 执 嗉 藮 士 执侄指 讋 angst/fluff/violence
an: I really can't believe that everyone is starting to like my writings like wow I'm happy.
promise part.i
Main Masterlist | Information | Rules And Guidelines 鉁 路 .
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The one and only woman that you loved is now standing Infront of you. You could feel your legs jelly and your breath gets sharp and fast.
She still looked dazzling her eyes is still the same from the last time you saw her, but you felt uncomfortable.her blonde hair blew from the wind and shined through the sun.
鈥 hey, are you ok?鈥 you've felt Sersi's hand brush your wrist and just nodded.
鈥 I've missed you so much.鈥 thena gave you a lovely smile and gave you a tight hug but You didn鈥檛 squeeze her back like the way you used to, didn鈥檛 circle your arms around her waist, didn鈥檛 rub her back in reassurance safe for a few awkward pats.
You just hummed in response she expected to you hugged her tight then kissing her cheeks but it doesn't seem you feel the same way about it.
鈥 Thena wanted to come to, she was very excited to see you so we had no choice.鈥 Sersi giggles while thena rolled her eyes while you just pushed a laugh.
It's rare to see thena having a effect on the others eternals except you and gilgamesh.
The two eternals noticed your quiet behavior that's why Sersi broke the awkward silence then moving on to your conversation.
You can felt a heat burning stare at your back but you just seem to avoid it and continue talking to the mute eternal.
鈥 she keeps looking at you.鈥 Makkari signed then raising an eyebrow her smiley lips turn into smirking.You just shrugged it of.
After Sersi inform everyone what had happened and her being The new prime leader of the eternals has made everyone into complete chaos.
Phastos created a Uni-Mind that made everyone bother the title but that didn't bother you at all well actually you didn't care at all.
Sprite and Kingo were on Ikaris side and wanted for him to be leader because he is the powerful amongst them.
You and thena were quiet, the blonde woman stealing glances at you then when you've caught her she would just looked away like she was doing something busy.
After the fight and Kingo left, all of you were quiet until you broke the silence
鈥 I'm going home.鈥 you took your jacket and purse. Everyone pop their head and looked up to you.
鈥 woah woah woah, excuse me where do you think your doing?鈥 Phastos pointed a finger on you while you look at him with a deadpanned look.
鈥 didn't you just heard what I said? It's getting dark I have more work to do.鈥 you felt a slendery hand in your wrist you raised an eyebrow.
鈥 seriously at this situation right now? You're going to leave?鈥 Makkari signed and looked at you with wide eyes which made you chuckled.
鈥 yeah I am.鈥 you stormed off you could hear footsteps to your back.
鈥 y/n!鈥 you let a shaky breath before you turned around to your back you could feel your stomach ache.
鈥 what has gotten into you?鈥 you groaned
鈥瀢hat now?鈥 her pupils flared to you she stepped back alittle.
鈥 ar-are you...really y/n,鈥 you tilted your head she grabbed your shirt collar 鈥 no, are you really still y/n?鈥 you stared at her for awhile when she let tears fall down to her cheeks.
鈥 who are you, what happened to you!?鈥 her eyes turned to gold shining eyes, you wide your eyes.
Mahd W'yry
She swayed her golden spear to you, until you falled to the ground with a thud, you whispered to call her name but she didn't stop there.
鈥 you lied to me, you broke our promised.鈥 she pulled her golden spear but it was stopped but Sersi.
鈥 thena no!鈥 Sersi yelled as she stopped the spear from attacking you.
an: I ('m sorry for the rush) lmao I thought I already posted it I'm such a forgetfulness, so yeah there will be no part iii sorry :(.
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waltertatim 18 days ago
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princesscherry a month ago
Not me choking on my own spit , how sad can I possibly be ? You must be joking
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porcelain-babe 4 months ago
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鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹喑嬦儲 馃尯 醿︵硧鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹
My safe mood...
鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹喑嬦儲 馃尯 醿︵硧鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹鈹
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charnazolam 7 months ago
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epitelyumyoma 22 days ago
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honeybear69 a month ago
Winter fashion cold looking | concept video | HoneyBear #shorts
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neutralin 6 months ago
So, here is the thing about fears
Kind of a disclaimer -> I'm not a psychologist of any kind but due to unfortunate circumstances, I developed many strong phobias in my early childhood which I try to overcome now as an adult. So I'm sharing my progress and experience since I successfully overcame many of my fears (i.e. doctors/dentists/injections)
"One way to unlearn unreasonable fear is to strategically and repeatedly confront the thing you are afraid of"
-> source
And even if it is in fact the only way to get over your fear it does not mean you should immediately face what you are afraid of without any preparation (this kind of stress can seriously harm your mental health) So here are some steps you can take to get yourself closer to your goal
1/ mental preparation
Understand your fear and take your time to get familiar with the idea of confronting it. Let your anxiety calm down as you do not have to act immediately. Do not plan any specific actions against your phobia until you get rid of other stressful factors since you will need all of your strength to face it. If you are burned out, have mental or physical health problems, deal with an unfortunate life situation then trying to battle your fear can lead to a huge mental breakdown and seriously harm your health.
2/ make a research
Fear feeds from uncertainty. Information is an uncertainty killer. Learn about your fear - statistics, other people's experiences, etc. Most of the time our fears are based on "what if something bad happens?" so you can specifically look for cases you are most afraid of.
3/ realize the roots of your fear
If you are afraid of doctors then why? For me, it's because I'm afraid of pain since I have low pain tolerance. We tend to have specific things we are afraid of and knowing them will help with managing the phobia.
4/ get more familiar with your fear
If you are afraid of dogs start with observing their behavior from a safe distance. Watch shows about dogs. Speak to dog owners. Repeat these actions regularly because it takes a long time to break a cycle that was built years ago and you can quickly lose your progress.
5/ calming affirmations
Since I use my fear of doctors as a reference for this post here is what I repeat to myself before my appointments
"Doctors want me to be well"
"They mean no harm"
"They will stop if I ask them to"
Adjust affirmations to what you are afraid of and repeat them constantly. The key is to use words that you actually believe in so they will ease your anxiety. Another trick is repeating - this action helps with self-regulating in stressful situations. At least that's what works for me.
6/ learn how to make yourself more comfortable
Learn about your specific coping mechanisms and use them. They will help you in the short term to ease your anxiety. Ask your close ones to help or accompany you as well. If you are afraid of airplanes learn how to feel better before/during the flight, the same goes for those who are afraid of doctors. Another thing that helps me is to plan to do something I enjoy after my doctor's appointment e.g. read the book, order something tasty or go somewhere. This will shift your focus a little but will work only if your anxiety is not too intense.
7/ seek professional help
If even one thought about something you are afraid of makes you extremely anxious you probably need professional help from a psychologist who will navigate you through the process and will give you more tools to maintain your mental stability. It is always a good idea to go to a professional if your fear seriously affects your daily life or catches you by surprise. (i.e. you are afraid of doctors but you got sick). There is specific exposure therapy for those who want to get over their fear.
8/ break the cycle and make it a habit
Unfortunately, if your fear was developed years ago it would take more than one attempt to fully overcome it. And every step back for you is a few steps forward for your fear. Every time you avoid a triggering situation your fear grows stronger and roots deeper in your mind. So make it a habit to think of facing it first instead of avoiding it. Fear is just a feeling, it's mostly our imagination even if there are some risks we can risk even more if we let fear control our actions (i.e. if I don't go to doctors I risk developing a chronic illness). There is a difference between avoiding risky situations which can lead to potential harm and avoiding situations due to unreasonable fear. The good news is that you can make it! Sometimes it takes a few tries but that's okay!
So, seems like another long read... Also, guess what? The topic of this post was included in the list of banned tags... So I had to manually copy-paste and adjust everything to new guidelines
Anyway, hope it was worth it! Take care!
#self care
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mindofmeraki 11 months ago
Im so glad we only live once cause I cant do this shit again.
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emily301999 a month ago
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Im specialized in all-kinds of interesting kinks such as: Ball busting, anal play,cum control, Orgasm denial, pussy eating, face sitting, pegging, wax,CBt, spanking , whipping , humiliations, chasity, sissification, feminization , foot fetish,piss play, cuckolding and so many on.
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theblackgirlthatcries a month ago
crippling loneliness
every waking moment is on survival mode. I desire for deep interpersonal connections and ive been searching for awhile. everyone is nothing but a pathetic disappointment in my life but maybe thats how God wired people to work. to be inherently flawed. and so I desire a friend who understands, who I can touch, who I can cry with and maybe even die with
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holkanavine 6 months ago
Sometimes you think that you want to disappear but all you really want is to be found.
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rascarcare 3 months ago
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Mobile auto detailing services
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sssoullessportrait 11 months ago
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My vacuum stopped working... Another one bites the dust
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al-fondo-de-la-botella 4 months ago
Yo no conoc铆 que era el amor hasta que te tuve en mi vida, me sent铆 amada y ame de verdad.
Ahora no se como continuar sin ti.
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epitelyumyoma 4 months ago
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