Slow progress is still progress. Everyone has their own pace, you don't have to be fast at achieving your goals. Just because you aren't going at the same pace as your peers, it doesn't make you any less successful. You will do great things in your own time, and I'm proud of what you've already accomplished.
the art of goal setting and achieving them™
alternatively, how to NOT be lost in life.
first of all, if you are someone who is treating this period as a season of rest, please go ahead and do it. you can always come back to setting goals and having changes in your life later.
this post is based on my personal experience and the few self improvement books that i have read. and this is from a person who was mentally unhealthy since as long as she can remember (slowly improving), so i get it, setting goals and achieving them are hard.
i understand, you feel like changing the whole life around on jan 1st, i know i know. i know it's always all or nothing mindset, there's lack of patience, there's guilt for the things you promised yourself you'll do but never did, there's grief over lost potential. i know. and i know that a lot of you lot are tired, lose motivation after the first day, have a couple bad days or weeks or months and feel like a failure.
i know it's hard to get out of bed sometimes or most of the times. i am listing everything at the beginning to let you know that it's okay. it's okay, you are not a failure. i promise
you can do this too! this may seem like looking at a void, but i promise you, life can be better and these are some strategies i am applying this year to get ahead of life.
how to set goal(s)?
if you are someone who already has one, i want you break it down to the smallest thing possible. your goal is to be healthy? startby saying: drinking two glasses of water daily is my goal. as simple as that. you want to get that good grade? start by making a moodboard on pinterest with those aesthetic pictures and a playlist of lofi music. something fun and slow.
if you are someone who doesn't have a dream, feeling lost and confused, i want you to look at what makes you happy. stuffed animals makes you happy? how can you take that one step higher? maybe start with learning how to make them, or designing them. your happiness comes from a band? what if you elevate your fashion, seeking inspiration from a band member? find a goal, which will bring you more happiness, write it down, break it down as above.
if nothing seems to make you happy right now (i get it love), look at what makes you comfortable. a vanilla candle, a hot cup of coffee, or a new mattress? make a goal to save up for that candle or that highly priced coffee or that mattress. there. you have a goal/dream/desire now.
how to achieve the goal
okay you are not going to like this but, slowly is the fastest way to achieve your goals.
when the present is unpleasant, we'll often only look forward to the future, yearning. but i want you to cherish the present, be grateful for anything (you are here, breathing, alive, and your life is changing for the better as we say it)
remember, anything on the upside from the present is good. it's better than the misery you are facing rn.
now if you perhaps have a list of goals, pick one from it. prioritise, choose randomly, ask a friend—do anything and fixate on one goal.
you got that? now make the simplest action plan. even for buying that vanilla candle. if you can buy asap, well congrats! you just achieved a goal! but if not, do some math and figure out how much to save each day/week/month to afford one.
reflect on your progress!!! it's really important to keep track of your consistent days. use a habit tracker, daily journal page method, recording/vlogging your journey, anything to make this more fun and indulging.
remember that achieving goals should be like a muscle. you need progressive overload. once you feel like you've mastered the first step in your action plan, move on to the next.
and once you have completed/achieved that goal, move on to the next goal! (or make one)
do NOT try to juggle multiple goals at the same time (it can be highly energy draining)
HAVE REST DAYS, IT'S MANDATORY. as much as the whole action thing is important, rest is important too! treat yourself, take rest. this was a major thing i had to learn the hard way throughout the journey :(
if you can, find friends with similar interests, habits, journey as you. online or offline. and share your stories in that safe space. it's always reassuring to know that you are not alone!
feel free to add more tips if you have!! or omit/modify any of the existing information in the article if you have better alternatives!! i just want to remind you once again that you are a beautiful soul and deserve the best things in life!!
2022 Goal Crushing Challenge
Now that I’m swinging back in action with free challenges, workout plans, goal plans and such.... Why don’t we start off on the right foot. It’s time to crush your goals and this challenge will force you to get on track whether you like it or not.
Pick Three Yearly Goals
The Most Important
Once you’ve picked out those three goals, on a sheet of paper write them down along with a list of tasks that need to be completed to reach them.
Example: If your goal is to reach B1 level in Korean ; You may need to finish all levels of TTMIK, Watch 10 KDramas, and Read 20 books !
Be specific, write down the small details of each goal. For example, if I were to have korean for a goal and i needed to read 20 books, have ALL 20 books listed out. And every level of TTMIk would be listed (not the lessons in this case but in many you will)
Once you’re done this is the order you’ll be doing things in for the next month. This is not going to be easy, in any way shape or form, but you will make progress on your goals.
This challenge is laid out in days 1 - 7 and will be applicable throughout the rest of the challenge.
Complete four tasks from your hardest goal
Complete one task from your quickest goal
Complete three tasks your most important goal
Complete one task from your hardest goal
Complete five tasks from your quickest goal
Complete two tasks from your most important goal
Set a timer for 2 hours and get as many tasks for your most important goal as you can done (30 minutes on, 5 minute break)
Complete five tasks for your hardest goal
Complete one task for your quickest goal
Complete one task for your most important goal
Set a 2 hour timer, finish one task from each goal, repeat (30 minutes on, 5 minute break)
Complete 5 tasks for your quickest goal
Complete one task for your most important goal
Set a 1 hour timer for each goal, in those three hours, complete as much as you can
Enjoy <3 - Queen
How To Begin Again [Yes, Even For The 500th Time]!
So, how are those resolutions coming? Yeah, me either. But that’s okay! I’m going to share with you guys how I get myself back on track and back to business as usual.
It’s normal to mess up, slip up, or even quit when beginning something new because well - ITS NEW.
It isn’t anything to feel bad about - let’s talk about how to start fresh.
D I S C O V E R.
This is the very first thing to do. Sometimes, when we don’t stick to a plan or a goal - it is because somewhere deep down we either don’t ACTUALLY want that specific goal OR we don’t have the tools we need to complete it.
Take 30 minutes today with a piece of paper and write down what you think happened. Take your time.
Here are some questions to get you started:
• How does this goal make me feel in my body?
• When did this goal pop into my mind? What influenced it?
• Why do I want this goal? What will I truly gain?
• What kept me from making this goal (& others) a daily habit in my life?
• What would I need to succeed this time and how can I get it?
• What are my fears surrounding this goal? Why?
P R E P A R E.
The next thing you’ll want to do is prepare yourself for success by looking at the answer to your questions above. Let them guide you in your preparation and make a list of everything you’ll need to succeed.
So if your goal is to wake up earlier, maybe you’ll need to put your phone in a separate area away from your bedroom the night before so that you can rest.
You’d pick a place to leave your phone.
Then you’d decide what time you’re going to bed.
T R A N S F O R M.
Thirdly, you’re going to TRANSFORM your spaces to reflect what your goals are. I don’t believe in faking it until you make it because faking it is for people who can’t but YOU can. We aren’t faking it - we’re BEING it.
If your goal is to be more studious - your desk should reflect that. Place your books, pencils, notebooks etc on your desk in a way that peaks your interest. If you want to be a lawyer later in life - try putting a few law knickknacks on your desk!
You are the future you! Become them.
C H E C K - I N
As you begin executing to accomplish your goals. I want you to take a day or two each week to RELAX and to STOP your routine. This is very important. Flexibility in life is necessary for our health.
You need to know that you can RELY on yourself to pick yourself back up again should things be thrown off. The shame around goal setting only exists because we shamed ourselves when we messed up instead of understanding that NOBODY is perfect.
During your days off - reflect on how you’re doing and what’s not working or what you no longer have an interest in.
R E W A R D.
You HAVE to pat yourself on the back for doing well. A lot of us struggle with this because it didn’t happen for us growing up but I’m telling you to celebrate every tiny victory you have.
We work best when we are LOVED so love yourself and applaud yourself often. Sticking to one of your goals really well? Reward yourself with something you like and tell yourself ALOUD that you’re really proud of you.
You’ll be surprised at how much more fun and simple it is to tackle your goals from a place of love rather than from a place of guilt or “falling behind”
S U M M A R Y.
+ question yourself on why it is you want your goals to begin with
+ use your answers to prepare you for success by listing what you’ll need to accomplish them
+ reflect your goals in your spaces with items, pictures, etc that remind you of your goals
+ check in with yourself often: two days of the week let your routine go completely. trust yourself that you can begin again!
+ reward yourself for every little victory.
I’ve been getting more questions on Instagram and Tumblr about my coaching and workshops. The free membership is back open, where you get one new lesson every week for a year. Also, my Level Up Blueprint & Confidence MasterClass is now available. If you don’t want to listen to me talk for an hour, here are some of the main slides.
I did my best to create a visual way of portraying how I go about my level up journey. In a nutshell, in 2016 I locked myself in my room for a summer and decided that I would not allow myself to move back to California or date any men until I had done the work to figure out what I wanted in life, who I wanted to be and how I was going to make it happen. That was where my Signature Self (alter ego) idea came into fruition.
For each phase, I simply went through each of these categories and defined what would be ideal for me, established my goals and created visual guides (vision boards, mood boards, etc). I rewrote my script for what my life would look life if I combined all of these and decided to actually start living.
Then, for each of my goals, I established milestone/steps (as a way to provide accountability and clarity), I created rituals (based on what I could do consistently to get what I wanted in life), I established a reminders/triggers/rewards system for when I lose motivation and need to get myself back on track. It is not shown here, but I also created a list of things that I enjoy doing as a “when I think there’s nothing to do” list so if I am bored, lack motivation or just want to get out of my head. This was I limit my zero days, and can still feel productive in my own way.
Let me know if you have any questions about this! 💗 I provided an example from myself (for language learning), and one from a client).
Here you can apply for my Savage Resilience Society Membership
you gotta do something different if you want to see change
I am here to tell you that you absolutely positively CAN.
Your dreams are realities that will blossom from your strong belief.
Made myself a new lock screen. Shout out￼￼ @iwaves for the quote 🖤
Another day, another study session. Reminding myself to drink tea or water every 30 minutes.
●New Moon Rituals●
•Practice positive self-talk.
•Write a letter to your future self.
•Write 5 things that you want to be known for at the end of your life journey.
•Practice a guided meditation.
•Be kind to yourself.
Remember, you're practice is valid. You define your magic, your space, your path.
Check out my shop.❤
May Theme : Unfuck My Life
As we move into May, I am going to focus on doing small, but meanful actions to unfuck my life. Here are my goals.
Do it now - if I have sometihng I need to do and it will take 10 min or less, do it now.
Get back into daily planning
Spend 15 min 2x a day doing things that will help future me.
At work, if a meeting get's cancled or I am presented with some unexpected free time, use it to work on one of my bigger goals.
Train Mapping Backup
Book Travel for June
Book Travel for July
Set up Sprinklers
Get this Pain / tooth issue behind me
Finish Atomic Habits
Get back into weekly finace review
I will probably add to this as the month goes on but I wanted to capture this as it is right now.
What are your goals for May?
Day 1/30: coding challenge
Also happy October, hoping this will be a good month 🌷.
A piece of advice for you:
Do not allow anyone to walk over the empire you built's ashes. Even if it burned down, you and how hard you worked should be celebrated and respected.
The Goal is to Change!
The biggest compliment is when people begin to say "you've changed". Take it as a compliment and keep elevating. The chatter may be annoying but the good thing is your growth and progress is visible. The goal is to change, No one should want to stay the same!
Setting effective (language learning) goals:
First off: why set goals?
Because statistically you are setting yourself up for success if you do.
Set a goal and write it down.
Writing it down lodges it in your long-term memory, helps you physically view and recall that goal, and helps clarify it.
Check out the link for the sources, but so many studies have proven that writing goals down helps you achieve them.
You’re 1.4 times more likely to succeed in achieving a goal when you write it down vs. someone who just thinks about it.
Writing it down and having an accountability partner gives you an 76% success rate on average ! !
K so now: how do you set good goals?
Im sure you’ve already heard this, but it’s worth repeating constantly. Set S.M.A.R.T goals!!
S = Specific. Make the goal that is specific in what you want to achieve. Don’t be vague or general, but really focus on something specific!
M = Measurable. Don’t say you just want to read „more“. How much more? Do you want to read 5 books in 2022 or 2 books per month? You can’t measure success or progress if it’s too abstract.
A = Achievable. I’m sure this goes without saying, but don’t set yourself up for failure. If it’s unreasonable and you can never succeed, don’t make it your goal. Set reasonable goals you have a chance of achieving!
R = Relevant. Does the goal line up with your life plan? Does working on this goal put you closer to your 5-year, 10-year, etc life plan? Or do you see yourself doing these things when you envision your idea life? Try to do only things that are relevant to the life path you want to be on.
T = Time-bound. If you leave a goal open-ended, chances are you’ll procrastinate forever. Give yourself and your goal a deadline. Put a little bit of pressure on you (just enough!).
What’s a good language goal?
I’ll tell you what it’s not. It’s not „become fluent in Korean“.
First: what is fluency? It’s such an abstract idea. It can’t be measured in exact terms.
A better goal would be something like „I will finish Talk to Me in Korean Level 1 by April 30th and I will do this by studying two lessons per week“.
That goal is specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound!
Make sure to make meaty goals with lots of information like this.
Making sub-goals (like watching one YT video about the TTMIK topic every Monday and Friday) or complimentary goals (like doing one italki lesson in Korean every Tuesday and Thursday of February) is also extremely beneficial!!
Others tips and tricks:
Motivate yourself often. Though note that dedication is far more valuable than motivation. Motivation will fade and only dedication will remain.
Watch TedTalks, inspiring YouTubers (check the link for another link to a master post of 400+ YouTube channels related to languages!), create a Pinterest board for motivation, etc.
Find an accountability partner! Tumblr is awesome for this. Find another person learning something (anything!) and offer to update each other about your progress regularly. This keeps you on track and helps you avoid long-term slumps!
Use goal journals and read self-help books about goal setting and achieving! Links to my favorites can be found on the link below :)
Good luck!!! 💜
My Digital Diet
~ rules i've set for myself to stay in the present
1. No phone for two hours after I wake up
this is a common one and it makes a big difference to my well-being. if the first thing you're seeing is news, emails from work, and notifications from socials you're throwing yourself into a bunch of unneeded tiny stressors before you're even out of bed. I like to stay unfazed and in that dreamy state for as long as I can.
2. Set it and forget it
If I'm doing a chore or task my phone goes in my room until everything is done. If I want music or a podcast on while I do it, I have wireless headphones and speakers around my house so I can set up the music then forget about my phone and get to work.
3. Maximum one hour of screentime per day
I love utilizing the digital wellness setting and making sure I keep up with my goals. I set locks on socials so after a set amount of time I can't access the app again that day and my phone automatically goes into Do Not Disturb in the evening.
4. No phone while with company
This is an obvious one that's seriously overlooked. The last thing I want while visiting with someone is having to take their attention away from their phones so I set the tone by putting my phone away whenever I'm chatting with someone. I want them to know I'm present with them and care about what they're saying.
5. Weekly digital detox
Once a week, usually on the weekend when I don't need my phone for work, I turn off all my tech and spend the day indulging myself in hobbies and activities that don't involve screens. Puzzles, crosswords, books, training my dog, food prep, cleaning, drawing, journalling, you name it. A day to disconnect and turn inwards. Mmm.
These are the more basic of rules i've set up to remind myself to stay grounded in the now. no distractions, no unnecessary noise, just me soaking in the present moment for all it's got. Thanks for reading. 🤍
2022 Language Goals
I'm going to queue this post to reblog at the beginning of every month, that should help me to remember the goals exist!
Achieve an A overall in my AS exam
Complete the Duolingo tree to at least level 1
Develop my taste in French music
Learn B2 grammar and pass a test on it
Be able to read intermediate articles with relative ease -> install browser extension that allows you to translate words and adds them to flashcards?
Complete Memrise Most Common 5000 Words course
Write a diary entry/short piece of writing at least once a week
Complete the Duolingo tree to Level 6 in all skills
Compile notes from online Irish courses and BBC Bitesize
Complete GCSE Foundation level papers to at least a C (record and self evaluate speaking)
Be able to hold a conversation to Silver Fáinne standard (record and self evaluate)
PLEASE FINISH GERMAN IN 3 MONTHS
Learn the 1000 most common words
Pass an A1 test online
Complete the Duolingo course to at least Level 1
Work through a few chapters of Russian course book
Learn the 1000 most common words
Pass an A1 test online
And of course I want to have fun and not be afraid to take language breaks, change these goals, do the bare minimum and dabble in other languages when I feel like it :D
(I know the type of goals I've chosen aren't for everybody but they're the type I work with best!)
How to Manage Your Life Effectively
The more you cram on your plate, the more you’ll stress.
“Getting your life together” - if this thought excites you, you may overplan and fail; if it burdens you, you may procrastinate and never start.
So how do you start?
How do you get your life together without feeling like every day is like clockwork?
In short, these are the kind of things that would help you achieve your goals:
1. Making a list of “big” goals (career move; applying for colleges; moving out, etc.)
2. Making a list of “small” goals (eating healthy; working out; meditating)
3. Writing down a timeline for the same (“by the end of the year I will have finished the applications for college; by the end of the month I will have meditated for at least 5 minutes everyday).
4. Keeping a diary to mark the progress. (“I achieved my small goals in September; I’m halfway through my college applications/ big goals as planned.)
5. Accounting for mistakes. Of course you’ll go off track. Always keep a buffer period of a week or two, just so that it doesn’t stress you out.
6. Accomplishing your small tasks weekly. Rather than setting a daily goal, set a weekly goal. (“This week, I’ll workout 5 days out of 7 days. This gives me 2 days of a rest in case I get tired earlier than expected.”)
7. Talk to your friends and family as you achieve every weekly goal. It’s nice for your circle to know that you’re working hard to trying to do good.
8. Take a break every now and then. Go for a pottery class. Go paint for a while. Take a walk in the park. At least once a week, rejuvenate yourself.
9. If you’re someone who needs to be pushed, do this with a friend or family member!
10. Remember to enjoy the process, even if you don’t like it. Don’t let yourself think that you hate this or it’s too hard. Tell yourself you’re doing a good job and that you’ll get there soon. Having a positive mindset changes a lot.