#god i just. it's a whole ass movie poster.

[transxfiles]

JUST WATCHED NEW OWL HOUSE . FUCK!

#DAMN THAT WAS. OKAY THAT WAS A WIN BUT ALSO WE LOST. WE WON BUT WE LOST. WE WON!! #BUT WE LOST. OH MY FUCKING. OH!! #I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE GOD WHEN OWL CLUB NET HAD A FUCKING. A WHOLE ASS MOVIE POSTER #INSTEAD OF JUST A SCREENSHOT FROM THE EP AS THE COVER IMAGE BUT !!!!!!! #HOLY SHIT BRO #AAAA #cricket.chatterbox

[thenewausten]

Nerd!Quackity x popular!Y/N AU [Part 2]

Part 1: here!

Today was the party you and your friends organised. The week was very nice, you and Alex saw each other everyday to study and talk, and to be honest, you were having a crush on him more and more. He's different, he's respectful and has patience to teach you, never judging you for not understanding something. Probably the best guy you ever talked to, and if he didn't feel anything for you, it's okay. At least you'd be friends.

But of course Alex felt something for you, you were so nice with him, before you even ask for his help, the boy would admire you from distance. He's so shocked with your beauty and the crush he felt for you only grew with you being so unique, cool and a little weird just like him. You were always laughing with him and you'd always talk to him in the hallway or wherever you were at school. <3

He says to you he's at the party and you open the door of the house for him."Hey." He says with a smile on his face and you hug him."Hi, 'Lex. Thanks for coming!" You say to him."It's okay, I'm leaving in thirty minutes." He says and you laugh."Stopp, let's drink something!" You grab his hand, taking him to the kitchen."I don't drink so much alcohol, so..." He starts."You really brought the nerd for the party, Y/N! Unbelievable." You hear a voice behind you two, you turn around to see one of your colleagues, he's a soccer and for some reason, he thinks he's better than everyone."He's my friend, dude." You say as you intertwine Alex's hand with yours."Yeah, whatever." He laughs and grabs a beer, leaving the kitchen."God, I hate him. Ignore him, okay?" He nods. "Relax, I'm used to it." He says and you give him a beer."It's the price you pay to kick their asses in every damn thing you do." You say and he laughs."Almost everything, I'm terrible at soccer." You laugh."I bet it's the only thing you're terrible at." He smiles to you, his cheeks burning in red with your compliment."Thanks." You drink your beer and grabs his hand."Let me show you my friends. I promise you they're nice." He nods and you start to guide him out of the kitchen.

Your friends were very nice to Alex, they really thought he was a nice person and thank God they didn't make any stupid joke with him. Thirty minutes later, the boy wanted to leave."Alex, please!" You ask him."Stayyy!" You hug him as the boy smiles and hugs you back."I want to sleep." He whispers and you groan against his neck."Please, 'Lex. Only this night and I promise you won't regret it."

"Okay, I can stay for more thirty minutes." He says and you celebrate with a little dance. The boy laughs and you grab his hand."Can I show you my bedroom?!" You ask him and he nods."Sure." You take him upstairs and open your bedroom door, as soon as you do it, Alex smiles. "Wow, it's so you." He says and you laugh."Right?! My whole personality is on those walls." Your bedroom is full of posters of your favourite bands, movies and artists, there's some draws and some photos in polaroid format near the mirror, and, of course, lots of plush animals on your double bed. He admires the photos near the mirror."Hey, let's take a picture!" You say as you grab your polaroid camera."Are you serious?" He asks to you as you sit on your bed."Of course, Alex! C'mon here!" He approaches you and sits on your bed, next to you. You point the camera for the both of you and take a picture.

"Here! Let's take one more." You point the camera again and take another picture."Which one do you want?" You ask him, showing him the photos."This one." He grabs the first one and you nod."It's yours. This one I'm putting on my wall." You smile to him and get up to put the photo on your wall. "Aw, it's cute."

"It's." He says with a smile on his lips, you sit next to him again and turn around so you can face him."Alex, can I kiss you?" You ask and he seems to be a little bit shocked."Do you want to kiss me?" He asks, confused."Uhum." You approach him."Can I?" The boy nods."Have you ever kissed someone before? It's not a problem if..."

"I'm not that nerdy." He cuts you and you laugh, Alex grabs your waist as you connect your lips with his. You put your both hands on his neck as soon as you deepen the kiss, you don't even fight for dominance, it's already yours and the boy doesn't seem to care about it, his fingers caresses your skin inside your shirt and you shiver, at the same time your body starts to warm up with his touches. You move away a little as you break the kiss so you both can breathe, Alex smiles to you and you smile back."You're so beautiful, Y/N." He whispers to you and you give him a peck on the lips, your hands on his neck as you approach him."And you're so handsome, 'Lex." You whisper and his cheeks gain a little colour, you kiss them aswell and then kiss his lips again, Alex's hands squeezing your skin as the kiss becomes more intense by every second. The boy pulls you closer and you decide to get onto his lap, moving your hips against his, making him groan between the kiss. You gently push him to lie down on the bed, smiling to him as you're now sitting on top of him. His hands roams through your body and you lean in to kiss his neck, making Alex whimper with the feeling of your lips on his sensitive skin."I guess I found your weakness." You whisper into his ear as your lips trace kisses on his soft skin, the boy underneath you squeezes your waist and closes his eyes as you suck on his neck, you smile as you hear a whine from him."Can't control yourself, 'Lex?" You whisper in his ear as you kiss his lobe."I'm sorry, I..." He starts and you smile to him."It's okay, I'm kidding, love." You whisper."Can you spend the night?" You ask him with puppy eyes."Do you want me to be part of your sleepover with your girl friends?" He asks, confused."Oh, no... I, I can send them away." You answer and give lots of kisses in his face."Can you?" He nods."Thank youuu." You kiss his lips and the boy holds your face, smiling.

"Hey, Y/N, everyone's..." Your best friend says as she opens the door of your bedroom, seeing you and Alex."Shit, I'm sorry." She closes the door again."Wait here, 'Lex." You say to the boy as you left your bedroom."You and the nerd, uh?" Your friend smiles to you as soon as she sees you and you smile back."So, everyone's leaving, where are we going to sleep?!" She asks you."Uh, can y'all leave? I mean, Alex's going to spend the night and..."

"Really? Already exchanging us for the nerd, Y/N?!" She cuts you and you roll your eyes."You exchanged me for that stupid soccer guy in the last summer!" You say and she shrugs."Fine, then." She leaves and you roll your eyes with her drama.

"Sorry, I had to say goodbye to everyone and clean some creepy vomit." You say as you open the door of your bedroom."Do you need any help to clean other shit?" He asks you and you deny."It's okay, let's keep doing what we were doing, what do you think?" You ask as you approach him, he nods with a smile on his face and gently puts you onto his lap again.

"I missed you, 'Lex." You whisper against his lips and he smiles."I missed you too, Y/N." You kiss the boy, holding his face as you feel his lips so so softly against yours. <3

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy the writing! :)

Requests are open!

#quackity #qsmp #qsmp brazil #quackity imagines #quackity x reader #alex quackity #qsmp brasil #quackity imagine #quackity x y/n #quackity x you #quackityhq #quackity headcannons #quackity fluff #quackity fanfic #quackity scenario

[salemontrial]

My (probably unfinished) official list of everything I love about the trailer💫

- "How's it going :))-" SWERVED. ALEXANDER CLAREMONT-DIAZ GOT FUCKING S W E R V E D-

- Nora looks like she's going to stab Alex with her high heel. Also she's so pretty. Xjakcjd

- "you've done some pretty stupid things in your life, but this-" "Takes the cake? :DD-"

- The way Henry looks at them when they're lying on the floor covered in cake. It's like he's restraining himself from strangling Alex with his own suit jacket for the sole purpose of not worsening the scandal.

- "HENRY. SHOVED. ME.😡🥺" "An urge I currently share."

- Ellen in her pantsuit.. hey Ellen👉👈

- Alex is looking for ways to escape the room when she says the words "damage control" he fucking knows-

- THEY. GOT. LIL NAS X. ON THE FUCKING SOUND TRACK. Oh I p r a y they got the rights to Get Low I p r a y.

- ALEX'S FACE WHILE ZAHRA IS BRIEFING HIM HES SO DRAMATIC

- Im sorry guys henry is so fine alexander isnt going to be the only one thirsting over henry for the entire 2 hours/jjj

- That FUCKING handshake in the park. I can see the veins in their hands they are g r i p p i n g-

- these faces this is a point.

- "My NDA is bigger than yours, I want you to know that." "You're wearing Lifts. I know that too, sweetheart." -H e a d t u r n--- HES SO FLOORED FJSNF-

- HENRY'S LITTLE MOUTH QUIRK AFTER HE SAYS THAT

- I CAN SEE THE KEY NECKLACE. I CAN S E E IT BLESS THE COSTUME DEPARTMENT SHOVING HIM IN A LOWCUT SHIRT-

- "You better act like the sun shines out of his ass and you have a vitamin D deficiency" ZAHRA HAS THE BEST LINES AND ITS WHAT SHE DESERVES.

- Alex faffing about with his hair via his phone camera before the interview thats my b O Y-

- Henry slides over the box of cornettos so hard like thats the only hostile act hes allowed to parttake in

- To the person who theorized in the comments of one of my posts that Alex was going to do a little shoulder punch in the interview scene i am going to draw you a little firstprince fanart-/hj

- Because that was so funny and so fucking cute henrys fucking face through that whole interaction was just. He looks like he's actively trying to dissociate from the situation fjsjfj-

- The cancer ward🥺🥺

- Alex's u g l y ass suit at the new years gala... its such a gross jacket guys Im sorry this is what happens when you dont have jUNE TO MICROMANAGE HIS WARDROBE-

- Alex putting his arm around Henry and Henry smiling to himself because he's probably got the most insane case of butterflies

- I'm marrying the lighting director of this movie.

- GUYS GUYS SHUT UP ITS THE KISS.

- HENRY'S FACE BEFORE HE GIVES THE "Christ, you are as thick as it gets" LINE IS SO FUNNY. QUESTIONING WHY HE EVER WENT AND FELL IN LOVE WITH A DUMBASS

- THEY D O N T KISS LIKE THEYD RATHER GO DOWN A RAZOR WATERSLIDE🎉🎉🎉🎉💫💞💞🏳️‍🌈/GEN

- He does Henry's "Oh shit" face so w e l l-

- ALEX'S STETSON EVERYONE GET AWAY FROM ME

- KARAOKE SCENE KARAOKE SCENE I SEE HENRY AT THE MICROPHONE

- Guys hes g o i n g to do the thing he does with the bottle I just know it oh my god

- "Get O V E R yourself your majesty -p i l l o w-" "It's your royal HIGHNESS -p i l l o w-" "OHoho-"

- The polo match sjsjf. Same alwx-/J

- The little new voters goal thingy poster thats so cute actually-

- The pride flag in the back of the campaign office

- Henry texting while he's getting the royal preening sjcj

- never thought id cry just hearing henry say he misses alex out loud-

- THEYRE NOT SANITIZING IT TO MAKE IT PALATABLE/POS

- HENRY IN THE CLOSET I AM GOING TO SCREAM-

- "If anyone sees you leave this hotel I will brexit your head from your body....... Your royal highness." I LOVE HERRRRRR

- IF YOU FEEL FOREVER ABOUT HIM. AND THE AND THE PANNING TO THEM IN BED WITH THE SOFT LAMP LIGHT. AND THEYRE SO SOFT. AND AND AND AND. UEUE

- "Do you love him?" "What difference would it make if I did?"

- Bea's voice is so pretty sobs..

- It's always the blond autistic boys in the blue hoodies I swear to god/lh

- Theyre just chilling in their robes🥺🥺🥺

- DAVID!!!!!!!😭😭😭💞

- "Prince Henry belongs to Britain" and what if i sobbed.

- THEM HOLDING HANDS SOMEBODY SEDATE ME.

- NO SHUT UP NO GO AWAY HENRY CRYING... I TRUST HIM WITH HENRY'S HEAVIER SCENES NOW

- THEYRE AT THE LAKEHOUSE😭😭😭

- "It's like there's a rope attached to my chest and it keeps pulling me towards you"

- THE ASS GRAB. ALEXANDER GABRIEL CLAREMONT-DIAZ

- "The night is young, ma✨" <- said as if he isn't currently groping the prince of England's ass

- She sees right fucking through him sjcjsj

CONCLUSION: I will eat my hat. The movie looks really really really fucking good, it looks spectacular and I am so excited for it. I trust them. I'm only SLIGHTLY mad they barely had Nora in it and I'm only SLIGHTLY bitter at cutting June and Luna. But I am an optimist and I will focus on the good which is that they're doing the characters incredible justice, and if I see one person try to deny their chemistry I will A Clockwork Orange their ass to this trailer for days. Because That Is Alex and Henry. That's them in front of my eyes and I think they're in very good hands and this is the most coherent thing I can write I'm still crying-/srs

#rwrb #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue movie #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #red white and royal blue trailer #rwrb trailer #🇬🇧🇺🇸 rwrb posting

[bookshelf-dust]

you are not a monster.

eddie munson x gn!reader

word count: 3,875

warnings: swearing, smoking, the events of vol. 2, eddie’s self-doubt and personal issues, trauma, mentions of blood, of death, sorta a fix-it-fic? the boy who lived has in fact not come to die

a/n: i’ve got, like, 240 followers now, and i am very appreciative. i don’t think i’ve ever had that many on any platform in my whole media-usage-world. i am quite the loser, so it is wild that you guys are—at least slightly—entertained by what i write. i love you ughh. this has been in my drafts for a long ass time seeing as i couldn’t seem to finish it, and i’m worried maybe it’s kinda shitty? i do like it for the most part, though. and it got long. oops. but i hope you enjoy it! <333

————

“Ugh, you know I don’t do double VHS.” Steve waved off Robin’s Saturday morning movie suggestion.

“But it’s about doomed love,” Robin tried again, clutching the video tape to her chest.

“Oh, well, that’s relatable.” Steve grabbed a cart full of movies to be restocked, swerving around a rampaging Robin.

“Precisely.”

You flipped around a movie in the new releases section that someone had fumbled with at some point or another, adjusting it so the poster was facing outwards, half-paying attention to the conversation going on between your two friends/coworkers.

“Also, Julie Christie is b-b-bonkers hot in this.” You snorted at Robin’s comment, and she tossed a sly grin your way before continuing on her rant about the most gorgeous creature she’d ever seen.

“We’re in Forest Hills trailer park in east Roane County.” Your neck cracked with the speed at which you turned your head towards the television Robin had just turned on, seeing both her and Steve staring up at the reporter.

“We don’t have a lot of details right now, but we can confirm that the body of a Hawkins High student was discovered early this morning. Police have not yet issued the victims name…”

“Holy shit,” Steve said.

You swore you could’ve fainted at that very moment. You felt dizzy, started to sweat, felt your hands shake—so much that you tossed the videos you were holding onto the counter, catching Steve and Robin’s attention.

“Hey, are you okay?” Steve asked, glancing at you and clocking how frazzled you looked.

“Th-that’s where Eddie lives. Forest Hills trailer park.” You hopped up the step to behind the counter, trying to see behind the reporter.

“No. Shit. That’s his trailer. Oh my god, that’s his trailer.”

“Hey, woah, woah, woah, calm down. How can you be sure—”

“Because Steve! I practically live there half the fucking time! I think I know what my boyfriend’s home looks like.” You felt like throwing up. Seriously, you needed some air.

"Okay, well when did you see him last?" Robin started, trying to console you before you erupted into full-blown mass panic mode. She set her hands on your shoulders.

"Last night. I went by the drama room to wish him good luck—you know, because of the campaign—" Robin nodded her head, urging you on. "It was normal, I don't know, I-love-you-see-you-later shit, but then I left to go watch Lucas! I didn't see him after that because he said he had a deal, that he had to go home and get something else f-for—"

"For what? For who?" Robin couldn't handle the suspense.

"For Chrissy Cunningham."

"Chrissy does drugs? Huh, that's interesting." Steve cocked his head, slipped his hand under his chin, contemplating the actions of the cheerleader you spoke of.

"Steve! That is not the focus right now. Besides, everyone has their moments," Robin berated her once jock-worthy friend.

"Right. No, you're right."

You separated yourself from Robin’s clutches, moving out from behind the counter. “I need to check on Wayne.”

“Wayne?” Steve questioned, looking at Robin who watched you disappear around the corner.

“Eddie’s uncle, Harrington. Keep up.” Robin clapped her hands. “She’s been with the boy for, like, ever.” Her focused shifted though, as Dustin and Max appeared, the former hurling himself over the countertop.

You collected your things from the staff room, ignoring the bickering from the other side of the door. Wayne was home, obviously, it was day time, but if the cops were there, no way was he gonna answer the phone. Maybe you should’ve gone to hunt for your boyfriend right away, but you couldn’t bear to not check on the boy’s uncle, who was probably just in the dark as you were—if not more.

It took you a little longer to get going, hands shaking so much that you dropped your keys, and then remembered to clock out. You scribbled an excuse on a sticky note in case Keith questioned your early departure on the schedule when he came in on Monday.

Pushing the green painted wood open, you slammed into Steve, who’d just finished helping a young woman, and put his hands out to steady you.

You turned your head, taking in Max, Dustin and Robin chatting wildly on three separate phones, all pacing equally. “What are they doing?” You asked, straightening Steve’s vest where you’d messed it up.

He mumbled something about Eddie’s friends when Max waved to get your attention, slamming the receiver down. “Do you know a ‘Reefer Rick’?”

The question was so odd, coming from her, that you shook your head before answering. “Yeah, Eddie’s supplier. Why?”

“Do you know where he lives? We’re trying to find Eddie.”

“Uh,” you rubbed your forehead, recalling the couple times Eddie had needed to stock up and you’d been with him. “Out by Lovers Lake.”

Dustin slammed his phone down at this new information, the group now frantic with chatter about your boyfriend’s whereabouts. You started toward the door, stressed and suddenly sweaty, when Dustin flew out from behind the counter, stopping you.

“Where are you going? Don’t you want to come look for your significant other?”

“Of course I do, Dustin. But I’m going to check on Eddie’s uncle. I don’t like the idea of him being left in the dark during all this. It isn’t fair.”

Dustin lifted his hat from his head, readjusting it and then setting it right back down.

“Okay.” He let out a breath that sounded like he’d been holding it in for a while. “Well what if he’s there? At Rick’s? Can you meet us there after your excursion? I don’t feel right looking for him without you.”

“Yeah, Dustin.” He gave you a hopeful high five, your palm stinging as you pushed your way out of the door.

————

Pulling into Forest Hills, your hands started to shake. What if they wouldn’t let you in?

You stopped beside the cop monitoring the entrance, rolling down your window.

“I’m sorry, miss. I can’t let you in. We’ve got an active crime scene on our hands.” Shit.

You took a deep breath, trying to keep yourself from stumbling over your words. “I apologize, officer. It’s just that I have a family member that lives here, and I’d really like to check on him. Just for a moment. I’m worried sick.”

The officer straightened from where he’d been level with your window, placing his hands on his hips. He looked around, looked back at you, looked up again. His resolve was slipping.

“Okay. I understand. But you have to be quick, okay? There’s a lot going on that I don’t want you getting caught up in.”

“Thank you officer, really.”

You cranked the handle, rolling up the glass panel and pulled off, trying to find somewhere to stop considering your boyfriend’s home was the crime scene. Eyes scanning for Wayne, you found purchase.

He was sat up against the geometric dome that was meant to be the designated play ground area. Except all the kids in the park had grown up at this point, so now everyone sat there to sulk or smoke.

The slam of your car door caught his attention, and he stood on seeing you, moving in your direction. He met you halfway, holding his arms out. That’s how you knew he was tired. Scared. Confused.

Wayne Munson was no cuddle-bug, but he had no aversion to hugs if he really knew you. But letting you see this much emotion right off the bat, letting you in, that’s how you knew he was hurting. This was his boy they were talking about. Where was his boy?

He was warm from being outside, and smelled of cigarettes. You pretended not to see the tear tracks left in the thin layer of dust on his cheeks. He didn’t let go for a long time.

“Have you seen him? Heard from him?”

You sniffled. “No. Not since last night. I saw him before Hellfire, but that’s all.”

Wayne wiped a hand down his face. “Did he seem alright?”

“More than. You know they were supposed to finish th—”

“The campaign. Yeah. How could I not know?” He smiled, and you could tell he was seeing Eddie hunched over the kitchen counter, pencil in his mouth.

He briefly filled you in. “They’re saying he did this. Killed that girl. But I know Eddie. He’s my boy and he didn’t do it. He couldn’t.”

“I know he didn’t. I’m sorry you had to find her. I’m going to look for him, okay? I probably shouldn’t tell you that, but I figured you needed to know. If I get to him, I’ll come tell you, okay? I’m so sorry, Wayne.”

Another hug. More reassurance on your part, on his, telling you that you couldn’t have known. You asked if he needed anything, but he said the cops were supposed to figure out where to put him soon. And that was it. You left him there, and sobbed in the car knowing how sick he was over his boy. Knowing what’d he’d seen, how frightened he was.

————

“Eddie! It’s me! It’s Dustin!”

The young boy tried so hard to get his older friend to hear him, to calm down. But that was kind of impossible given the situation. He tried to understand.

“You won’t believe me.” Eddie’s voice was broken, his eyes glassy, his fingers going numb from his grip on the broken bottle.

“Try us.” Max knew what it felt like to be that confused. To be that uneasy. But he spilled his guts, and now the group of unlikely friends sat with him.

The slam of a car door made Eddie jump, made Dustin shoot up from his spot on the floor. Dustin peeked over the window sill, spying you looking a little lost at where they might be, so he hurried outside, much to the dismay of everyone else, scaring the shit out of you, but making you hopeful nonetheless.

“Any luck?” You whispered, not quite grasping his sudden appearance from the boathouse.

“Yeah! Yeah. He’s in there. And he’s scared shitless, but he’s okay.”

“Really?” Your eyes were glazing over and there was nothing you could do about it. He was alright.

“Really.” And he took your hand, leading you back and gently pushing the door the rest of the way open. He let you in first, lingering behind.

You moved in, eyes scanning for him, first roving over Steve, Max, Robin. But there he was. Up against the wall, hands in his hair. He looked up at you, and visibly softened, but sunk in on himself nonetheless.

“Baby.”

“Eddie.” You dropped your bag, not giving him time to stand, moving to meet him on the floor.

Your knees met chilly concrete, and you went to reach out for him, but you stopped yourself, noticing how broken he looked. “Eddie? Is this okay? If I touch you?”

“Y-yeah.” He nodded as he said it, eyes moving quickly back and forth between yours. To Eddie, even though there were four other people in the room, it felt like everything else faded away the second you walked in. You came for him. You’d believe him. He knew you would.

You opened your arms, and he fell into them, arms going around your back, head falling to your chest. He buried his face against you, squeezed you so hard it hurt, but fuck if you were going to tell him to let up.

You ran your hand soothingly over his head, gently untangling curls without the intention of doing so. Glancing up, you met Dustin’s eyes, and he gave you a small smile. “Thank you,” he mouthed. Dustin wanted to thank you for putting up with him, for letting him steal your boyfriend, for being so kind, for calming Eddie down. For everything.

“I went to see Wayne, Eddie,” you told him, moving your hand to rub his back. The boy perked up at that, looking at you with fear all over his face considering what he’d done.

“I-is he…is he m-mad at me?” He looked so young, so fragile.

“No, he’s not mad at you, sweetheart. He’s just worried. Scared. Wants his boy safe.”

Eddie winced, but pulled away from you anyhow. You brushed his bangs away from his eyes, straightened his vest, buttoned a chest pocket. “Do you think you could tell me what happened, maybe? You don’t have to now, really you don’t. But whatever it is, I believe you, okay?”

He hummed in reply, and relayed the story again for you, even if it hurt, and the rest of them tried to catch you up on their theory.

What you didn’t see was Robin turning to Steve, eyes softening at the way you and Eddie interacted with one another. How that scared look in your eye that had been there at the store was gone, just from seeing him. How Eddie’s hands had stopped shaking at your presence. How he wasn’t afraid to be vulnerable with you, and how much you cared for him.

But he made it so easy for you.

————

“Shit! Shit!” You stumbled over your own feet, hopping over ever root and vine you met in your path, trying not to make your presence known.

You’d been with Steve, Robin, and Nancy. The four of you were meant to go to Creel House while Eddie and Dustin distracted those fucking bats.

But you had this feeling. This sick, sick feeling.

It was eating you alive. It was something Eddie sad at Skull Rock. Something about running. And then right before you parted ways. When he’d kissed your head and muttered in Steve’s direction, “Trust me. We are no heroes.”

And standing there with your friends, trying to save the world, you ran. Ran for Eddie’s sake. Because he was going to do something. You just knew it. Some sacrificial lamb shit.

And it hurts, the running. Your legs are burning. It’s the kind of running you haven’t done since you were a kid. The desperate kind. But this time it’s not in order to beat a friend to the finish line, to win a competition. It’s to get to your boyfriend. Because you’re afraid he’s going to die.

And you can hear them. The bats. Their horrid screams, the leathery and wet rasp of wings, of tails thrashing in their rage, their determination to get to the source of that noise. The noise that had just quit.

You’d just caught the end of Eddie’s playing, and barely had time to think about how he’d finished it. He’d been determined to finish that fucking song and it’d been two weeks.

But none of that mattered.

Because you could see the trailer now, and it hadn’t occurred to you that maybe you wouldn’t be able to get in. That was the point of their reinforcements, anyways.

You stumbled up the concrete stairs, reaching for the door handle, trying to ignore the ever increasing sound of the bats, the sounds of them closing in. You didn’t dare glance over your shoulder, knowing they’d be right there.

Wrenching open the door, metal screeching, you almost smacked into Eddie. He’d been holding onto the sheets, but he had that look in his eye. The decisive one. And then he heard you clattering in and he practically tumbled free from his hold on the fabric.

“What the hell are you doing here?” You looked up seeing Dustin, who looked equally as frightened and desperate for Eddie to get to the other side.

“Whatever it is that you’re thinking, stop it. Go. Now. Climb.”

Eddie looked at you. Really looked at you. A look that said I need to do this. I need it. “You first.” He backed away, beckoning you forward.

“No.”

“No?”

“You go. Now.”

“Baby, please go. I’m begging you. If I go now, I can buy more time. I know it.”

Eddie looked desperate. He needed this. Needed to know he was good for something. He’d been such a failure. And he could do this. He could be good.

“No! Fucking go, Eddie! Now!”

He blinked at you, not expecting the change he found in your voice. He’d never heard you sound like that before. So angry. So angry at him.

So he let up, reaching and pulling himself towards Dustin. Towards home.

You felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. And then you tried to get yourself up, calming considering in the time that you’d stood there, the noise had stopped—the bats had stopped. Your friends had done their job.

You pulled and it hurt, but you did it anyways.

————

It had been three days since Eddie almost sacrificed himself and you’d been avoiding him ever since. He knew why you hadn’t come to see him, and he was upset at himself for hurting you, for not realizing you could read him so well. But it felt like that was the only way to prove himself.

And now he was living in a fucking tent in the Wheeler’s basement, supposedly like some girl with superpowers had.

The boy was flipping through one of Mike’s old X-Men comics when the sheet providing him refuge was torn back. Dustin appeared, making Eddie jump. “Jesus Christ!”

“Here.” Dustin threw a hand radio at him and then vanished again. It took him a minute before he realized you had one too.

A few guesses later on what channel he needed, he found you.

“Hey, I know you can hear me, baby. I know you’re mad.”

You reached for radio where it resided under your bed, stretching so that you didn’t have to actually get up, the chill of hardwoods meeting your fingers.

As much as you wanted to pretend you couldn’t hear shit, you wanted to talk to him. Something was really wrong if he thought he’d needed to do that. And maybe it was wrong of you to be upset, but you loved him. He didn’t need to complete some grand act of service to be redeemed, he was already your hero.

“Afternoon, Munson.”

Eddie slumped down inside his tent, smacking his head on the wall. He really was too lanky to be living in there.

“Son of a bitch!” He rubbed his hand, skull throbbing from the impact. “Hey, honey, please come see me. I wanna talk to you. Please.”

“Yeah. Yeah, fine. Unlock the basement door, okay?”

————

You sat against the support beam at the bottom of the stairs, watching Eddie tie up the sheet so it’d quit falling down and he could see you properly.

Your lower back started to ache and he noticed, passing you a smushed pillow. Silence filled the hair until you decided to breach the surface. “What were you gonna do, Eddie?”

He scrubbed his hands over his face, fingers bare of their usual silver, as the rings sat in a pile of his other shit, metal accoutrements proving incredibly uncomfortable to sleep in when living on the floor.

“Buy more time. I thought that if I could get the bats to back off, that they would’ve had the chance to kill Vecna. That Dustin could get home okay. I don’t know. And don’t give me that look.”

“I didn’t want anyone else to get hurt. I could’ve done it. I swear. I just wanted to be good for something for once in my fucking life. Prove that I’m not this—this thing. This nuisance. This monster.”

“I guess I thought I could be the hero for once.”

You moved towards him, sitting on your knees and taking his hands into yours. He wouldn’t look at you, eyes darting around the basement walls, the old furniture indented from years of bodies molding the cushions.

“I understand. But I wish you didn’t feel that way. I wish I could fix it. I’m sorry I didn’t come to see you sooner. I was just upset because I had this feeling, Eddie. I thought you were going to die.”

“But, Edward Munson, you are not a monster. You aren’t a nuisance. Anyone that’s ever thought that is a piece of shit and you know that”

You put your hand on his cheek and he blinked. Hard.

“Eddie, look at me, please.”

The boy turned to you, looking just as young and fragile as he had in the boathouse. He looked disappointed in himself.

“You’re my hero.”

Eddie bit the inside of his lip so hard he tasted blood, forcing himself not to cry.

“Your Gareth’s hero. Mike and Lucas’ hero. Eddie, your Dustin’s hero. But, sweetheart, you didn’t have to save the world to prove yourself. You’re everything to me. To your friends. To Wayne.”

That was the tipping point. Uncle Wayne. And the tears slipped out, silent and calmly, easily sliding down his finally clean cheeks.

“R-really? I’m your hero?” Eddie’s hands were shaking.

“Yeah! Of course you’re my hero, Eddie. You’re such a badass, you know.” A grin pulled at the corners of his mouth. “You are not a monster. I’ll spend every day for the rest of my life telling you that if you’d like. I’d do anything for you.”

“You didn’t need to save the world by fighting off demo-bats, Ed. You’ve saved it by being you. By shepherding those little sheepies. Shit, you’re so good, Eddie. You’re golden.”

Eddie Munson had been waiting his whole life for those words. For someone to reassure him that he wasn’t this sick creature. This freak. And he was your hero. That was better than anything in the whole world to him.

————

Wayne rested against the cool brick that constructed Hawkins High School. His current place of refuge post-earthquake. Pulling his flannel closer his chest to keep out the wind, he reached in his pockets for a lighter and a pack of Marlboros.

He didn’t look up at the sound of gravel crunching around him, used to the noise of other people fluttering around him.

“Any chance you’d lend me one of those?”

Wayne’s hands froze from where they’d been peeling the plastic wrap off of the new cardboard box. He knew that voice. But he thought it was a trick. He looked up anyways.

And there, standing in this alleyway, somewhere he definitely shouldn’t be, was his boy. Eddie’s hands were in his pockets, a bandana over his forehead.

He smiled that award-winning smile, the one he’d used on Wayne as a kid when he wanted pancakes or temporary tattoos from the coin machine at the grocery store.

Eddie made his way over to his uncle, to—let’s face it—his dad. Wayne enveloped the boy in his arms, squeezing way too tight, but Eddie wasn’t going to complain. “My boy.”

Eddie rested his head on his uncle’s shoulder, breathing in that familiar scent that never seemed to go away, of cigarettes and the came cologne he’d been wearing since Eddie was a toddler. That smell he’d welcome after a rough day at school, after he’d done well on a science project.

“I never gave up. I never stopped looking. I knew you didn’t do it. Not my boy.”

“Thanks, uncle Wayne. For everything. I love you.”

“I love you too, kiddo.”

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

#eddie munson #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson x gn!reader #stranger things fic #wayne munson #dustin henderson #robin buckley #eddie munson x you #steve harrington #eddie munson comfort #eddie munson angst #max mayfield #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x gender neutral reader #eddie munson fix it fic #savannah’s fics

[booktomoviebrawl]

We are not judging how bad the movie is, we are judging which adapted the book the worst. There are good movies that are bad adaptions.

Propaganda below the cut (spoilers may apply)

Mortal Engines:

GIVE HESTER A DEFORMING SCAR YOU COWARDS. But in all seriousness, there was a lot wrong with the adaptation. The book was very cinematic to begin with, with lots of grandeur and intrigue as Tom starts to unpack all the brainwashing he's grown up with. Then the movie turned Hester into a generic girl boss, wiped out all of Tom's character growth to make him a useless sidekick, and took out a lot of the cool world building and political intrigue. Oh, and heaven forbid Hester, who had her face run into with a sword, be in anyway disfigured. Even though Hester being "ugly" was what made me love her so much as an insecure teen girl.

Joyless. Unwilling to actually give the female lead a decent facial scar which is just embarrasing. Shoved in a chosen one narrative where there didn't need to be. Changed the entire ending from tragic to saves the day style shit. Worst of all it's a really niche property and seeing it suck ass is all that most people are ever gonna see of it but the books are So Good. CGI does slap tho

The cool, severely scarred female character is replaced by a girl with a teensy little cut on her face. The robot ethics are removed and the humor is stupid

Stormbreaker:

GOD it sucks the og book series deals with the whole fact that if a 14 y/o schoolboy became a spy he’d have TRAUMA and MISERY and HATE IT AND THE GOVERNMENT TOO but then the movie is like. la de da this is so fun tee hee i love being a spy :))) i hate it. i hate it with the power of 1000 suns why are you trying to make this shit GLAMOROUS. especially i hate the us release poster what IS that

Gonna be honest I watched this years ago so I don't remember exactly what was different but it was different enough that I didn't like it and I LOVED the book series

The absolute slap stickery of a mess that movie made of the supposedly cool spy boy and his descent into darkness due to adults who only use him for their own means , ptsd symptoms rising be damned

#tournament poll #mortal engines #alex rider #stormbreaker

[sowoozoo-7]

Love, Lust & Litigation | Ch 1

Pairing: Jungkook x Fem Reader x Namjoon

Genre: lawyer!AU, coworkers to lovers, slow burn, eventual smut

Rating: M (18+) whole fic, this chapter PG-13 (for language lol)

Warnings: some swearing in this chapter, nothing explicit

Word Count: 4k

Summary: Unfortunately, you have developed a massive crush on your new boss. Even more unfortunately, your equally attractive coworker is also harboring massive crush on your boss. AKA Jungkook and reader both pine for big, sexy brain Namjoon. 

A/N: Phew! Here she is! The first chapter of my first fic. This has been slowly chewing away at my brain for the last few months, and I finally decided to say fuck it and write it. I don't know anything about law or lawyers other than what I've seen from movies and read in books so I'm sure I've gotten something wrong, but whatever, it's my own alternate made up universe.

Anyway, I’m new to all this — longtime reader, first-time poster — so I’d love feedback if you have any! Hope you like it ~

mlist | ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5 | interlude | ch 6

Two hours into your new job at Bang and Associates, and you’ve already made a fool of yourself.

The first couple of hours went smoothly. Check-in with HR was all standard forms, waivers, and NDAs, and the view from your new office is killer. 

Though your new boss and the other associate on the litigation team are at court for the morning, you get to meet two of the paralegals on your team, Jimin Park and Hoseok Jung. They look like they just stepped out of a menswear ad, in their fitted suits and slicked back hair. You'd normally be wary of office workers who look a little too put together, but you get the sense that they’re going to be good coworkers from the few minutes you spend talking to them, both good-natured and quick to share a laugh. 

It’s when they’re giving you a tour of the office that your heel slips on a set of marble stairs and you find yourself briefly experiencing flight. You decide flying is overrated when you land on your ass and bounce down several steps. One of your shoes takes its own trip and lands a few yards away. You sit on the steps, frozen for a minute, with your bare foot just out there for the world to see. 

“Oh my god,” says Hoseok as he rushes down to the step where you landed. “Are you alright?” 

You’re quiet for a moment while you deliberate whether or not you’re going to cry. It’s inevitable that you’ll cry in front of your coworkers one day, but looking around, you see everyone else in the atrium glancing over at the absolute idiot who fell down the stairs on her first day. 

Not the day to cry, you decide. First impressions and all that. At least you wore a pantsuit today and not a dress.

“I think I’m okay,” you say with a rueful smile. “Just a bruised ego.”

Jimin retrieves your shoe and hands it to you with a sparkle of laughter in his eyes. “Another one bites the dust." It’s not malicious, you don’t think.

“He means that you’re not the first to slip down the stairs,” says Hoseok. “We think the janitors are polishing them extra to get back at all the asshole lawyers.” 

You limp for the rest of the office tour. 

***

You get sent to the courthouse after finishing the brief admin in the office to shadow your new boss, the firm’s superstar. 

Namjoon Kim is mesmerizing.

You have heard of his reputation — how could you not? Top of his class with a winning streak unmatched in the industry — but you have yet to see him in action. 

He lives up to his reputation. 

You sit at the back of the courtroom, trying not to put too much weight on your bruised ass, watching as he delivers his closing statement.

His voice is deep and measured, drawing everyone to the edge of their seat to hear every twist to the argument he’s crafting. You pity the opposition. They went first with their closing statement and now they’re squirming in their seats as Namjoon takes down every argument, point by point. The jury hangs on to his every world. 

Maybe it’s the way he carries himself, with a quiet confidence and authority, maybe it’s that he’s built like a tree and looks like a dream in his pinstripe suit. Whatever it is, you get the feeling that working under a beautiful genius is going to be some kind of Dantean torture. 

“Thank you, Your Honor.” 

You blink, realizing it’s over, and you watch as he goes to sit. Silence hangs in the court room in the brief second it takes the courtroom to snap out of their Namjoon-induced daze. The room shuffles as everyone shifts back in their seats. The closing formalities continue, with the judge sending the jury to deliberations. 

“Court is adjourned.” 

The room rumbles with a flurry of activity as everyone goes to exit. You hurry to catch Namjoon — you want to introduce yourself to your new boss as soon as possible — but you get lost in the shuffle of people filing out. By the time you catch up to him outside, he’s giving a press interview on the steps of the courthouse. 

You wait on the outskirts of the small crowd that’s gathered. Deja-vu hits as you watch the reporters lean in to hang on to his every word. He takes the questions with grace, and even a little humor, and smiles at a joke one of the reporters makes. 

Dear lord. He has dimples.

“Spectacular, isn’t he?” 

A young man stands next to you, smirking as if he knows how much you’re fangirling over your new boss. You recognize him as the second attorney at the defendant’s counsel table. The remaining member of the litigation team. 

If you weren’t so preoccupied with Namjoon, you’d be mooning over this man instead. His just-messy-enough-to-show-he-doesn’t-care hair frames his face in waves. An eyebrow piercing and a lip piercing glint in the late morning sun. Tattoos decorate the back of one of his hands. He would look like a punk kid up to no good, but you can the tell the suit he’s wearing costs more than your monthly rent. Jesus. Is everyone in the office just a walking GQ campaign?

“Excuse me?” 

“Namjoon,” he says with a smile that changes his expression entirely, from a little rakish to boyish in its delight. “I call it the Namjoon Effect. No one’s immune. I think it’s the dimples.” He puts out his hand to shake yours. “Jungkook Jeon. I’m th—“

“The other associate on the litigation team. I know.” You shake his hand and introduce yourself. “Looking forward to working with you.” 

“Ah, I thought it was you. Jimin texted me to look out for you today.” 

The impromptu press conference breaks up and Namjoon ushers his client down the stairs. 

“Come on, I’ll introduce you,” says Jungkook, flying down the steps. You follow at a slower pace, the twinge in your hip reminding you of your fall earlier that day. Still, you try to strike a confident stride in your heels. First impressions and all. 

Namjoon pats the roof of the private car he has bundled his client into and straightens as Jungkook claps him on the shoulder. 

“I thought we weren’t going to talk about any type of evidence to the press.” 

Namjoon raises an eyebrow. “The PR team said that. I didn’t agree to anything. Besides, it’s the same evidence we presented at the trial, just in a different light. Even if we have a less-than-favorable verdict, we’ll still have the public on our side.” 

Jungkook rolls his eyes. “Why do you even bring me with you?” He sees you and gestures you over. “Namjoon, may I present your latest lackey.” 

“I resent that,” you say, mock-frowning and pointing a finger at Jungkook. “But you’re not wrong.”

You introduce yourself to Namjoon and shake his hand. It’s warm and firm. You hope yours isn’t cold and clammy. “Pleasure to be working with you.” 

“Pleasure’s all mine. I’ve heard great things from your former boss,” he says with a smile. There go the dimples again. He glances at his watch. “Shall we discuss our caseload over lunch?” 

You feel a little thrill at being included in the “our.” Bang and Associates have a reputation for working on some of the most high-profile cases in the city and you’re ready to dig your greedy little fingers into the cases. 

“Cat’s Pajamas?” asks Jungkook. He doesn’t wait for an answer. “I’ll drive.”

Namjoon sighs as Jungkook turns to walk towards the garage. “He always weasels his way into lunches. I swear he’s a never-ending pit,” he says with a note of fondness for the younger man. 

Cat’s Pajamas is an airy bistro just a few blocks away from the offices. There’s a sizable lunchtime crowd, filled with self-important business people taking their clients out to lunch. Jimin and Hoseok meet your group at the restaurant. 

You wince at you sit down, rubbing at the side of your hip. The bruise you expected from the fall is developing faster than you thought. 

“Are you okay?” Namjoon asks. 

He and Jungkook look at you with concern.

You wave them off. “Just a bruise.” 

Jimin shakes his head. “The marble stairs have claimed their newest victim.” 

“Ah,” says Jungkook with a knowing nod. “I almost broke my wrist when I fell down those stairs a couple months ago. It’s practically a rite of passage at Bang and Associates at this point.”

“Looks like you’re already part of the team,” says Namjoon, lifting his water glass in a toast.

***

The rest of the day passes quickly.

You return to your office to find a stack of documents already on your desk, with a sticky note from Hoseok on top. Welcome to the team!!!! it says, with a big looping smiley face next to it.

You slip out of your heels and bring your legs up under you as you settle into your desk, a routine study position that has followed you from college through to your professional life. There’s nothing you like more than finding your way in the maze of paperwork and laying out your trail in court. You lose yourself in the legalese, getting familiar with an ongoing case that Namjoon mentioned over lunch. 

Jungkook pulls you into his office when you’re returning from the bathroom to strategize about the case. His office is exactly the same as yours, with enough space for two guest chairs, a large desk and a set of bookshelves crammed with leather-bound law books. And, your inner petty competitor is pleased to see, the view is also almost exactly the same. Of course, he has a slight advantage because he’s worked here longer, but you have the same job title, the same office. You’re almost on even footing. You’ve noticed a competitive streak in him, and you’re excited to play against it. It’s only going to make you a better lawyer. 

The “quick chat” turns into an hour-long discussion and you decide by the time you leave his office that you’ll head home at normal close of business hours. You’ll be staying late anyway as your caseload grows. 

You’re surprised to find a brown paper bag on your desk, one of the simple gift bags you can find at the drug store. Inside, you find a get well soon card with a cartoon of a man on a hospital bed in a full-body cast with a thermometer coming out of his mouth and an ice pack on his head. Inside, it reads: 

Even though your welcome to Bang and Associates was a painful one, I’m very happy to have you on the team and I look forward to working with you. Now you know to avoid the stairs :) 

-Namjoon

Inside the bag you find a bruise balm and a travel size pack of ibuprofen. Warmth spreads through you, pleased at the gift. There’s another layer to that warmth, a feeling that you don’t want to examine too closely, because he’s your boss, and you suspect (no, you know) it's inappropriate to feel that towards your boss. 

Later that night, though, as you’re applying the balm to the colorful bruise on your hip, you can’t help but think of his dimpled smile.

***

“You’re babying me.” 

You’ve won your first case for Bang and Associates. Your client, a rich young widow who married an older man for love, was the sole inheritor to his massive fortune. His children, some older than the widow, were upset that they got nothing in the will. As you worked with the client, you got the sense that she was genuinely sad about her late husband’s passing. Not that it made any difference. She was a paying client, and you had to represent her regardless, but it made rooting for her easier.

“I thought it was for sure a trick case and that there would be something to trip me up in the prenup, but it was so straightforward.” You’re in the elevator with Namjoon heading up to the office. He was present at the trial, to keep an eye on you to make sure you lived up to the promise of your initial interview.

He shrugs. “It’s nice to start off with a win. You’d be surprised with how many people don’t prepare or get wrapped up in how things should be and completely flounder.” He pats your shoulder as the elevator dings open. “You did good today. Good prep, good execution.” 

He nods a goodbye and heads to his office without looking back. You head to yours at a slower clip, your shoulder burning where he touched you. You feel warm overall anyway, knowing you did a good job, but the praise still feels good. A little too good, maybe. 

Over the next month, the cases get harder and harder, and you have to pull out the most obscure references from your time in law school. You start spending more and more time at the office, racking up insane amounts of billable hours. You have a permanent cup of coffee at your desk and you change into your fuzzy slippers you brought from home to give your feet a break from heels whenever a new case file lands on your desk for review. 

At least you’re not the only one pulling crazy hours. The rest of the litigation team often stays late. You fall in quickly with the guys, cracking jokes over the Nespresso machine you all hover around. They were wary of you at first, an unknown entity coming into the equation, but you proved worth after the second night you stayed late and cracked the key piece of a case buried in ancient tax laws. They treated you to drinks at the local watering hole afterward. The biggest reward though, was getting a small dimpled smile and a thumbs up from Namjoon before he called it a night.

It helps that your boss stays late with the rest of the team. Every time you come to him with a tricky case, without fail, he gives brilliant insight or a nudge in the right direction, giving you advice on where to look for the answer.  And when he goes to his fancy client dinners, he’ll always bring something back to the office when he inevitably stops by the office on his way home. You can’t say no to a good takeaway creme brûlée. 

One Friday afternoon, Namjoon pulls everyone into a meeting a half hour before close of business. “It’s been a tough few weeks. You’re all going home at five today.” He holds up a hand when the team starts to protest. “I’m going to be at Silver Spoon for happy hour. Drinks are on me. You don’t have to come, but you can’t stay here.” 

“I have too much work to do,” Jimin says with a pout. 

“I’m firing you if you don’t leave at five on the dot.” The good-natured threat falls easily from Namjoon’s lips. “That goes for all of you. Wrap up what you need to.” 

You spend the rest of the time cataloguing what you need to finish Monday morning. Usually you’d work Saturdays too, but with the promise of an early weekend, you decide everything can wait until open of business Monday. Well. Maybe you’ll work on that memo from home over the weekend, but everything else on your to-do list can wait. 

You join Jungkook and Hoseok at the elevator bank three minutes before the hour. 

“Think he’s gonna make it?” asks Hoseok with a laugh.

You check your watch. “Two minutes left. He’ll make it right at five.” 

“He’ll be two minutes over,” says Jungkook.

“I think five over,” says Hoseok. 

“Loser buys the nachos,” you say. They both shake on it.

Jimin runs into the elevator bank just as the clock ticks over to five. You pump your fist in victory while the other two groan. 

Jimin leans over to catch his breath. “I thought I wasn’t going to make it.” 

He straightens just as Namjoon rounds the corner from his office.

“Glad I’m not losing any of the team today.”

“And I get two sets of nachos,” you say, getting into the elevator behind the rest and pressing the button for the ground floor.

“Hobi gets the nachos. I’ll get the wings,” says Jungkook.

Jimin looks back and forth between you two, a confused pout on his face. “What did I miss?”

***

Silver Spoon is all leather and dark wood. Namjoon leads the way to a large booth in the back, waving to the bartender behind the gleaming wooden bar. 

“You know everyone,” comments Jungkook as you all pile into the booth. It ends up with Namjoon in the middle, you and Jungkook flanking him, Hoseok next to you, and Jimin next to Jungkook. 

“I’ve been working in this area a long time. It pays to get to know the people working at your favorite haunts.” 

Namjoon drinks whiskey, neat. Junkook orders a pint of the house craft beer. Hoseok has a glass of red wine, and Jimin has a double straight vodka. You get an elderflower spritz, light and refreshing in the unusually hot fall afternoon. 

The conversation deteriorates to work talk, as it usually does among coworkers. The nachos and wings follow the drinks, and everyone digs in. They’re good, just the right amount of elevated to make the price worth it, but not so fancy that the bar food is unrecognizable. 

Silver Spoon fills up as the finance bros and hedge fund managers who work in the area trickle in. You recognize a few former coworkers, and you raise your glass to them in a toast when they wave hello, but you don’t attempt to engage further. You don’t care to reconnect with them. The cutthroat, backstabbing environment at your last firm is what made you leave in the first place. Bang and Associates hires ambitious lawyers, but fosters a workplace that manages to keep the ones that are ambitions without the cattiness, encouraging a collaborative work environment over individual hotshot lawyers. You're settling into your new workplace just fine, thank you.

Namjoon gets a call shortly after the third round of drinks, and Jungkook and Jimin shimmy out of the booth to let him out so he can take the call in private. 

Hoseok picks up where the conversation left off, brainstorming where to start to research a tricky case. Jimin interrupts him before he can get a full sentence out.

“Uuuugh,” he says, dragging his hands down his cheeks. “Can we talk about anything but work?” 

“Please,” you say. 

Jimin looks at you with a mischievous grin and pops his chin onto his hand. He calls your name in a singsongy voice. “Are you seeing anyone?” 

You snort into your drink. “Do I look like I have time for a relationship?” 

“It’s amazing what you can get up to in our limited free time if you have some determination,” mutters Hoseok with a sidelong glance at Jimin. 

“Jimin is slowly working his way through the office,” explains Jungkook.

Jimin crosses his heart with his finger and holds a hand up. “All above-board with HR, of course.” 

“Doesn’t mean you haven’t left behind a trail of broken hearts,” says Hoseok. 

“They all knew what they were getting into when they consented to the relationship.” 

“Or lack thereof,” says Jungkook with a snort. 

Jimin turns to look at him, eyebrow raised. “Speaking of lack of relationships, still hung up on Namjoon?” 

Jungkook turns an impressive shade of red. “Stop, I’m not—“

“Ever since he broke up with his ex-girlfriend, he’s had this massive crush on Namjoon,” Jimin tells you.

“Shut up!” 

“We all see how you look at him,” says Hoseok, not unkindly. “Stars in your eyes when you think he’s not looking.”

So you hadn’t been imagining that. 

Jungkook’s only response is to chug the rest of his pint. 

“I don’t blame you,” you say, then freeze as three heads whip around to look at you. “What?” you ask, voice squeaky.

“Not you too,” groans Jimin. 

“What?” You hope the heat creeping up your face isn’t noticeable in the low bar lighting. “I have eyes. He’s attractive. You can’t deny that.” 

“And smart,” says Jungkook morosely. 

“And kind and he’s a good leader. I’m surprised you guys aren’t also harboring secret crushes,” you say, as if they’re the idiots for not having a massive crush on their boss. In reality, it’s terrifying to say these things out loud, everything you’ve been thinking over the past month you’ve been working at Bang and Associates. 

“Unfortunately, I’m straight,” says Hoseok. 

“And disgustingly in love with his fiancée,” sneers Jimin. “It’s actually sickening to see them together. She’s super pretty and an amazing dancer — you’ll see at the holiday party— and you really want to hate her but she’s also really nice on top of all that.” He takes the rest of his drink in one shot without a wince. You’d think he was sober if you hadn’t seen him down his vodka doubles like they were water. “And I’m not straight, but I know a lost cause when I see one. Namjoon’s practically married to his work. There are other men and women still waiting to be added to my bedpost.” He waggles his eyebrows in an exaggerated imitation of a leery cartoon character. 

“You’re disgusting, you know that?” 

“Thought I don’t know about Namjoon.” Jimin continues like he didn’t hear Jungkook’s comment. “I don’t think he’s married, because I’ve never seen a ring, and I’ve never seen him flirting or taking anyone home after drinks. No dates to company parties.” 

“Maybe he’s asexual,” says Hoseok. 

“That would be a shame because I bet he’s got a big d—“

Jungkook interrupts Jimin with an elbow to his side. He sits up straight, and you follow his line of sight to see Namjoon coming back to the table. They move out of the booth to give him his spot back in the middle. 

“Sorry about that. What are we talking about?” asks Namjoon as he settles in, just an inch closer than he had been sitting before. The intoxicating spicy smell of sandalwood that you’ve come to associate with Namjoon fills your nose and you suppress the urge to take a deep breath. 

You and Jungkook exchange guilty glances over the table. Jimin heaves a dramatic sigh, thankfully drawing Namjoon’s attention away from you two. 

“We were just bemoaning our single status. Not Hoseok, of course.”

“I’d be surprised if you all have time to date, what with the hours we’ve been pulling.” 

“How do you balance it all? Work, a social life, dating?” The question falls from your lips and you wish you could shove it back in your mouth. Jungkook kicks you from the other side of the table, and Jimin looks impressed that you actually asked the question. 

Namjoon lets out a hollow laugh. “I’m the wrong person to ask.” 

You exchange glances with Jungkook again. Does this mean he’s single? 

Before anyone can ask a follow-up question, a group of lawyers from the (mostly) friendly competition approach the table to make small talk. You want to shoo them away like pigeons so you can continue the conversation, but you busy yourself with your drink instead. 

Your coworkers disperse soon after, with Hoseok slipping away to go home first, red-faced and quiet. Namjoon talks to a group of his law school classmates by the bar. 

As the evening progresses, it’s painfully obvious to you now that Jungkook is mooning over Namjoon. You’d had your suspicions before, but after the conversation from earlier, the not-so-subtle glances make you cringe a little. You hope you’re not that obvious too. 

Not that Namjoon’s presence stops him from chatting up sone of the women who join your table. They work in the advertising firm a few floors below you, and you’ve gotten friendly with them over the past few weeks. The petite woman with the swishy blonde hair touches him a little more than necessary. 

You and Jimin exchange looks when you both clock her hand on Jungkook’s bicep for the third time in as many minutes. 

Jungkook and the blonde head out together not too long after. Good for him, you think, not getting so hung up on Nmajoon that he can’t focus on a different pretty face for the night.

When it’s just you and Jimin left at the booth, he leans in a little close. “What do you say you and me head out?” 

You laugh in his face. “I’m not going to sleep with you, Jimin.” 

He takes it in stride, and stands with a wink. “If you ever change your mind, you know where to find me.” 

He blows you a kiss before zeroing in on one of the finance bros who’s been looking over at your table for the past hour. He won’t know what hit him once Jimin is done with him. 

You don’t bother trying to pull someone at the bar, choosing instead to slip away without any fanfare. Though you’re no stranger to one-night stands, you’re looking forward to sleeping in and you can’t be bothered with the logistics of a hookup. Tonight, you have a date with your bed, and your bed only. 

The air has a bite to it as you step out of the bar, and you pull your coat around you as you hurry to the curb to your Uber. You settle into the back of the car as the driver pulls out into traffic. 

You can’t help but feel kinship with Jungkook, what with both of you lusting after the same ill-advised man. The city lights blur by and you let your eyes unfocus.

You wonder what would happen if you were the last three people left in the world. Would he go for you or Jungkook? In your buzzed state of mind, you think you really wouldn't mind sharing.

©sowoozoo-7 2023

Please do not copy or repost. I do not crosspost anywhere else.

#jungkook x you #namjoon x you #jungkook x reader #namjoon x reader #bts fic #bts smut #junkook fanfic #namjoon fanfic #jeon junkook smut #kim namjoon smut #fic: love lust & litigation

[soapiemomorphine]

His Firsts

When he first came to

Leonardo startles. There’s a commotion but nothing registers besides white noise.

He’s dead. He knows this deep in his soul. His heart no longer beats and the floor feeling like an afterthought, as if the earth it’s self was a fleeting memory.

The afterlife is colorful. And loud.

He gets up, only for his eyes to be bombarded with green light.

His instincts tell him to assess the situation.

He appears to be in a collapsing building; there are only two people in it. And neither of them pay any attention to him despite being in there direct line of sight, only confirming his beliefs.

He is indeed dead, but his apparition is among the living.

He just wants to see his father already.

The two people are yelling at each other. They both tower a staggering six feet.

Leonardo takes a deep breath. Not that he needs the oxygen, but he needs to calm himself. He needs to get out of the fighting for your life headspace.

He needs to not think about he’s a failure. He can’t think about his brothers, oh god his brothers-

Pieces of rubble phase through his spirit. The guy with horns and goat legs runs toward the exit, while the rat looking man is furiously dodging the falling bits of the ceiling.

Leonardo squints at the rat man. He seems to be holding something, and his distress makes the hero in Leo want to help him.

Then he sees what he has in his arms.

Four turtles.

Then it clicks.

He won’t be able to move on to the afterlife, because he’s not in his dimension. He’s witnessing the origin story of another Hamato clan.

He doesn't know what compels him to follow this Spliter.

That's a lie. He wants to see his family again.

The first difference

This Splinter is different.

If you forget the fact that Leo’s hands tremble whenever this one speaks, Leo feels sorry for him.

(This first time he heard his voice, he had a breakdown. Not that anyone could see.)

They are camped in an alleyway, his arsenal of stolen clothes swaddling both him and his turtles.

Babies are hard enough on there own, but four of them? While homeless?

The babies weren’t the only ones constantly crying. This Splinter’s hair is already going grey and Leo is pretty sure it hasn’t even been a month yet.

His rat features are becoming more obvious.

Leo has the suspicion that this Splinter used to be a movie star.

Leo has seen posters and DVD covers in the trash, starring a man that shares a striking resemblance to this Splinter. Sans the ears and tail of course. Not to mention for the first couple weeks, the only outfit he had was the one this ‘Lou Jitsu’ wore.

Leo can see the headline on the newspapers that he uses as a makeshift shelter, news of a missing action star, beloved by all.

His suspicions were confirmed in one of this Splinter’s breakdowns.

Usually, the turtles are pretty compliant, but babies can only cry, and when one cries, the rest follow suit.

“ I can’t do this.” The mutant rat grips his hair in frustration at the wails of the children, “ I can’t fucking do this,”

Leo can’t do nothing but watch as both parties meltdown.

“I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS!” Tears cascade down his cheeks, mirroring his young, “ FUCKING BIG MAMA, FUCKING YOKAI, FUCK, FUCK,FUCK, FUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKKK!!!!”

His babies wail even louder. Leo just stands there useless.

The ratman freezes at the sound of a window opening, and rushes to scoop up the turtles.

Leo stays close behind.

They move to a different alleyway.

“Shush, shush, I’m sorry I’m sorry,” Splinter holds his sons close in a desperate effort to quiet their cries.

“I didn’t mean to yell, I-“ His voice breaks in his apology, “ I don’t know how to handle kids, fuck, I don’t know how to handle myself.”

“This whole time I’ve been running toward the limelight, but it always bites my in the ass, huh?” He starts to hum a Japanese lullaby.

Leonardo watches as the babies slowly fall silent.

“Guess Im a father now, huh?” Splinter let out a wet chuckle.

Leo gets the closest he’s ever gotten to this Splinter and takes a seat against the wall right next to him.

Despite his voice, and despite Leonardo’s own heavy heart at this similar yet so different image of his family, he smiles.

It’s not like anyone can see.

His first name

It’s been a month or two and he may have been wrong. About the whole no one being able to see.

The turtles, unlike him and his family are all different species.

They do not have names however, with Splinter calling them all “Little One”, or “My son,” and either addresses the one he’s holding or all of them as a whole.

But they are all different.

One is much bigger than the others, with spikes all up and down his body. He often bites the blankets and on some rare occasions, Splinters finger. The big one hardily makes a fuss though.

The same cannot be said for the smallest one. He is covered in warm colored speckles, and is half the size of his brothers. Yet he is somehow the loudest. He is constantly clinging on to someone, whether it be his brothers or Splinter.

Another one if the turtles has a softshell. Leonardo was flabbergasted at this, none of any other dimensions had a softshell turtle. He’s never even seen a wild one, let alone one as a mutant. Both Leonardo and Splinter worry the most about him.

Then there is the one who has red stripes. The one that Leonardo is almost certain can see him. He is often climbing over his brother and causes mischief, and pushes his brothers over. He’s often smiling and enjoys pulling on Splinters fur.

But what scares him is the way the red striped turtle looks at him. Not through him. At him. He looks him is the eyes, looks him up and down, and the scariest thing of all is that he reaches for him.

Leonardo doesn’t know what to do. So he keeps his distance.

He’s gotten used to the whole ghost thing, where no one could see him.

It was lonely but he was used to it after a while.

But now one of the turtles can see him.

He now looks to him when he cries, when he’s climbing on the big ones back, he smiles at him from Splinter’s lap.

It’s all very terrifying.

Especially when, he pushed one of his brother and listened when Leonardo on reflex said no.

So that’s Leo’s life now, following Splinter as he raises four nameless turtles.

That may have something to do with Splinters terrible eyesight.

Leo has the suspicion that Splinter has near-sightedness.

He can only read the news with his eyes nearly closed and millimeters away from his face. He doesn’t see the profanities on the alley walls, that make Leonardo worry, will the children learn that language?

He also is only able to tell the turtles apart once they are in his face or in his hands, “Ah!, you’re the big one!” He has to feel the turtles to differentiate them, and when they’re together he addresses them as a whole.

His suspicions are confirmed when Splinter finally loses it one July, “You’re all growing old now, how am I going to be able to tell you apart?” He grumbles and grabs his hair in frustration.

Leonardo is worried. What will Splinter do when they can walk? If only one is doing something dangerous how will be able to tell that specific turtle to stop? Leonardo feels a heavy weight in his gut at the possibilities.

He’s snapped out of it with a lound ripping sound.

In an act that is most certainly considered illegal, and probably come off as a hate crime, Splinter rips a rainbow pride flag hanging from a store front.

“HEY!” An angry voice emerges from in inside the store.

Splinter scrambles for his children as he scurries away.

Only the red-eyes child can see Leonardo following.

When the chase is seemingly over, Splinter find a different alleyway and takes a seat.

Leonardo doesn’t know what to think. Why would he steal a pride flag?

He is given the answer with Splinter ripping each stripe apart.

He accidentally makes a rip right through the yellow and green stripe and he tsks.

“Didn’t need all seven anyway,” Splinter grumbles under his breath.

He then pulls all of the turtles out of their cardboard box, awaking them from their slumber.

Leonardo takes a seat as he watches the turtles each stir and whimper. The softshell seems particularly upset and is trying to go back in the box, but to no avail.

The small one then starts whimpering as he is taken off the biggest brother.

Splinter take the red stripe and ties it like a ribbon around the big one’s neck.

“Red,” he then places him in the cardboard box.

He then grabs the smallest turtle and shushes his whimpers. He gently ties the orange stripe around his neck.

“Orange,” he places him right on top of his brother.

The red-striped one realizes the fastest way in the box is through Splinter, and he reaches for him.

“Blue,” the turtle practically scrambles to be a part of the turtle party in the box.

A loud cry comes the softshell, still going at the wall of the box, watching all his brothers go in but unable to.

“Shush, shush” Splinter gently picks him up. The turtle is awake enough to squirm when he ties the last color.

Splinter, despite cutting an indigo stripe forgoes it completely as he tied the purple stripe around his son.

“Purple” He whispers and puts his child in the box with the rest.

Leonardo feels his heart beat heavily in his chest, despite not having one. Of course.

Splinter smiles and points to each of his children, “Red, Orange, Purple, Blue,”

Raphael, Michelangelo, Donatello, Leonardo. He realizes.

The same colors.

It may not be the same but nothing here is.

He swallows the lump in his throat as Blue smiles at him.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #rottmnt two souls #rotmnt mikey #rotmnt raph #rotmnt leo #rotmnt donnie #tmnt fandom #fanfic #my fic post #tmnt leo 2012 #rotmnt splinter

[seeingivy]

after seeing catoru, I like to hc that Satoru played the Grinch (that man seems too comfy in that cat suit to not have prior suit experience🤨 slayed the house down with this role no doubt it won him an Oscar). Suguru was Martha May Who (basically their jjk roles reversed but if Suguru had come back to love his man😔🙄)

oh I LOVE THIS HC. actor!gojo is genuinely so unserious because first of all. he is like obviously a very phenomenal actor - this man is not a triple threat for no reason like he can do it all. but because he can he LOVES oddball movies like this where he just gets to play a fucking weird ass character. some examples:

the grinch, like you said

mrs. doubtfire. he plays mrs. doubtfire.

I already added to my canon that sukuna gets to play the prince in cinderella BUT gojo is playing the king but he makes the role SOOOOOOOO UNSERIOUS GOD

elf. he is the elf in elf. stupid ass fucking movie has his name written all over it

also like even tho he's an A lister he keeps ending up in hallmark movies, not cuz he can't get roles, but he just loves the plot. like oh he's a businessman going to a small town and falling in love with a baker yup

listen. i've thoguht about this long and hard. TWILIGHT in the method acting verse. here are my castings:

annie is bella. she eats that whole no emotion thing up so easily

yuuta is edward. he got that sickly pale thing going on too good. (jean hates his life when he doesn't get cast)

reiner is jacob 😭 he puts his whole reinussy into bella where the hell have you been loca

that being said. GETO IS LITERALLY CARLISLE SORRY LIKE THE WHOLE SEXY DOCTOR DADDY THING HE EATS IT UP SO FAST

levi is charlie. he got that whole angry daddy thing going on without even acting

that being said, who is satoru you may ask?

aro. that motherfucker from the volturi who just stays giggling for no reason. like that litearlly is him sorry I don't make the rules.

and the worst part? actor!gojo will do all this unserious stuff but once in a while do like a poster ad for calvin klein or like a shirtless vogue cover and everyone is foaming at the mouth. because at the end iof the day, he is just sexy.

#asks! #method acting

[kavehnanginto]

encounter

06: meet me at midnight

Sober and sleep-deprived you free yourself from the confines of home and on to your local library. Perhaps after your bowl cut friend's mental breakdown and rituals maybe, just maybe, Alhaitham was actually just like any college boy suffering to get a a degree.

According to Faruzan, even Miss Lisa had inner conflict with her hot ass self as to why Alhaitham accepted her offer. Listen you just fucked someone and they happen to be smart why are people acting like its the last thing in the world.

You also did that with some blond chick a year ago and nobody cared.

Okay maybe it was because you lost to a dare to Scaramouche but that's just a minor detail. He's a minor detail anyway.

Nights are boring when you're not high, it looks pretty but whatever. You've seen it once, you've seen it a hundred times, it's just night. This is why you are not a very good english major. But at the bright side you are enrolled in the Akademiya, when you first got the news you shared it all over social media like the clout chaser you are.

Humming nostalgic lullabies you fasten your pace into the nearby library. It's always the goddamn library can't take a fucking break. Here you are going to see your tutor at the middle of the night, just like that one time.

BUT THAT DIDN’T END WELL, DID IT?

If people knew this they’ll think that’s what you did to him to become your tutor, your whole reputation will be ruined but hey you fucking the hot guy nobody likes will create good jokes for a school reunion in twenty years time. Even if people will call you a pretentious whore. That’s not a very good argument and neither is your thesis.

“Why is it closed, I just spent two minutes to walk here my feet are sore.” You complained when you saw the library gates closed. “Does he have some VIP entrance, I bet that nerd has.”

Quickly taking your phone to talk and then a flash of light hit your face.

“Oh God you actually came…” nonchalant voice, with a hint of sarcasm ringed your ear. Does he take sleepovers in the library every day or something? “Did you just spontaneously went here because you had nothing better to do?”

“Yeah…?”

“Oh God.”

Even with murmuring complaints he dragged by your shirt inside. Is he gonna take it off? Just kidding, this is scary. And then after entering you see stacks of books in the floor, scented candles, a poster of the movie cover of Pride and Prejudice and a picture of his friends on the side.

Wow he didn't suit you for the sentimental type.

“What?” He eyed you like you were the craziest person in the room and then with a book containing the summary he sat peacefully and even offered you to study quietly with him.

Maybe Scarabitch was right, he was a clown.

encounter: prev. masterlist. next.

alhaitham x reader smau

synopsis: after alhaitham accepted to tutor his token dumb classmate, the whole school started rumors and gossip to the unknown reason as to why while you were stuck dealing with him after that embarrassing encounter.

taglist: @annathea-annoona @aixaingela @mimimimiaphwsgi @no3hg3nshin @winterpein @crowbird @aloversoath @liminalimmortal @mochicurls21

note: i may or may not spontaneously change a lot of plot points so this can become more serious because thats what i did so ugh yeah but don't worry the intro is just purely fluff and comedy and no one will become a different person in the next couple chapters its just that i will take this smau seriously( because i never did this was like supposed to be some funny meme for me)

#alhaitham #alhaitham x reader #alhaitham x gender neutral reader #alhaitham x you #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin fluff #alhaitham smau #alhaitham x y/n #genshin alhaitham #genshin angst #genshin x gender neutral reader #genshin smau #encounter smau

[cookinguptales]

god, rn I'm remembering what it was to be like 11-13 years old at the height of the lotr movie craze and how everyone would ask you whether you were into Aragorn or Legolas. and all my friends had Legolas posters on their walls and occasionally you'd meet some other middle-school-ass girl who was like "well, I like Aragorn because I'm an adult who can appreciate a real man" which is a wild thing for a child to say but like

I remember feeling so Above It All because I couldn't care less about Aragorn or Legolas. I'm here for the story! the drama! the adventure! ladies kicking ass! ladies stealing the show! ladies being kind of preternaturally beautiful with their swords out like that and uh yeah I don't care at all about hot people, I'm here for the substance. like, y'know, Arwen on a horse!

anyway, things made a lot more sense a couple years later. lmao

(and yes, this whole cycle just repeated when PotC came out and all my friends were arguing about Will vs. Jack when Elizabeth was right there.)

#you know we don't have hot women with swords enough in movies anymore #I would like more fantasy movies with practical effects and adult women with swords #like I'm glad that YA fantasy exists for kids now but I would like grown-ass hot women to stare at while they hit things with swords #I have so much more disposable cash now that I'm a grown-ass lesbian I wanna go see your movie in a theater like 5x

[undiscovered-horizon]

Dating TASM!Peter Parker

We all love the nerdy and cute wall-crawler

When it comes to dating, he's winging like 90% of it

Makes me think of "2 poor kids" by Ruth B

I will gladly elaborate:

He doesn't have the confidence to casually come up to you and ask you out, so he waits for a good opportunity to arise

And it's just his luck that the gods of love and romance are on his side

For science class, the teacher paired you up with Peter for some project because the two of you wrote essays on similar topics

So now not only does he have an opportunity to get closer to you, he is kind of obliged to

You get some take out and go to his house to get some work done

Aunt May gives him a thumbs up when you're not looking, agreeing with his choice because you're cute af

He's sweating buckets, not gonna lie. His objective is to come off suave but Peter's basically screaming inside his head

You point out his Star Wars posters and, to his surprise, start a conversation about the franchise with him

Peter is in his geeky element and gets visibly more comfortable immediately

Guys, you were supposed to be doing a science project not discussing the movies and video games from the recent decade

You've done barely any school work and it's already evening, Peter offers to walk you home

And the conversation just doesn't stop

Just like his heart palpitations because he's crushing hard on you

You're not only beautiful but a generally cool person??? His heart might give out

The two of you quickly become inseparable and everyone already assumes you're dating and the two of you, being the idiots in love that you are, pretend that you're oblivious to the rumors and curious whispers

Your first kiss is like a chick-flick tbh

You're working on the science project, sitting at the desk in his bedroom, so basically you're smashed against each other because there isn't much space

Peter and you quietly discuss something until you realize there are maybe a few inches between your faces

The two of you just timidly lean it and softly peck each other’s lips. Then again. And again. Until the timidnes is gone and you’re tugging at each other’s hair

Exchanging comic books

Making playlists/mixtapes for each other that you listen to together

Like riding the bus, sharing earphones and playing songs that remind you of each other or that you both like

Listening to podcasts about science and/or unsolved mysteries

He's definitely secretly watching romcoms as "research" because he wants to be that boyfriend, you know?

Sharing your lunches

Making out in the library

Inside jokes that are basically you quoting nerdy shit at each other (very cute)

"Hello there"

"General Parker"

You wear his hoodies and jackets a lot

His "photography practice" is basically making whole photo albums of you

You learn about his wall-crawling alter ego when he knocks on your window one night, face bloodied and bruised, not really knowing who else to ask for help

He's apologizing profusely while you're trying to take care of his injuries which is hard because he gestures a lot explaining things to you

Peter thinks you're gonna drop him but instead you admit that he's the coolest person you know

And that's how you have become his accomplice

Covering for Peter when someone questions his sudden, prolonged disappearance or bruises

If you had a habit of killing the odd spiders that appear in your room, now you feel a little weird about it and just try to push yourself through catching the arachnid and letting it out of the window

"study dates" but you end up falling asleep on him while he's reading academic textbooks

Which proves difficult because you look so adorable and the domestic affection is making his heart perform olympics-grade gymnastics

Sometimes you can tell he's trying really hard to be the rom-com dream boyfriend and although it melts your heart that he cares so much, you remind him that he's the perfect boyfriend just as he is

One of you always has a weird-ass question ready for the other and no matter how ridiculous, you have an actual discussion about it

Movie nights but really yall just want to cuddle

You exchange a lot of random soft pecks

Cute quiet moments when one of you is laying in the other's lap and you either just stare lovingly at each other or have dismembered conversations because you're more focused on each other than the talking

He's always there to help you study but you are distracting tbh

Dates on rooftops or other high places where it's just the two of you and the beautiful landscape of New York

Eating pizza on top of Chrysler Building

Making out on rooftops of skyscrapers? Yes please

Feeding each other snacks

Peter throws you over his shoulder just for shits and giggles

If you even suggest you might be tired, he's giving you a piggyback ride

You’re Spider-Man’s number 1 fan

And Peter loses it one day when you show up in a Spider-Man hoodie and ask him if he likes it

His arm is always around your shoulders or waist

Holding hands while you’re doing homework or reading something for class

Sometimes he brings you flowers which might or might not be a little crumpled because he had them in his backpack while swinging through New York

Stay-in dates when you eat junk food and play video games

Either cheating or cuddling, depends on the game

Calling each other "babe" or "love"

Sharing dessert

Aunt May sometimes spies on the two of you sharing ice cream or a piece of cake in the kitchen and she’s fangirling because yall cute

Serious discussions about cake flavours

Speaking of aunt May, she’s grown used to the fact that Peter’s either not at home or he’s home with you

Sometimes you sleep over and those are the mornings that it’s you and Peter making aunt May breakfast instead of the other way around

Unless it’s a weekend and you two sleep in till noon

You’re worried about Peter when he’s out saving the city and so he texts you he’s alright when he comes back home

#fanfiction #fanfic #imagine #scenario #marvel #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #marvel imagine #marvel scenario #spider-man #marvel spiderman #spiderman #the amazing spiderman #spider man imagine #spider man scenario #spider man x reader #the amazing spider man #amazing spiderman #tasm!peter parker imagine #tasm!peter parker x reader #tasm!peter fluff #tasm!peter parker #tasm!peter x you #tasm!peter x y/n #tasm!peter imagine #tasm!peter x reader #andrew!peter imagine #andrew!spiderman #andrew!peter x you #andrew!peter fanfiction

[shirtlesssammy]

The Winchesters 1x01: Pilot

*Quick disclaimer: We’re writing this recap in October of 2022. From all that we’re seen and read online, Carlos uses he/him pronouns, though the actor who plays him is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns. If things change for the character, we’ll adjust accordingly. Just wanted to note this for future readers!*

Then:

Dean died, Cas died, Sam got a bad wig. 

Now: 

Even More Then:

New Orleans

March 1972

Indiana Jones Samuel Campbell finds the secret entrance to the catacombs through the mausoleum entrance adorned with the Men of Letters symbol.

He performs the blood ritual to open the door to doom, unleashing a creature that sends him running back through the cemetery like he’s being chased by a giant stone boulder. He trips, his flashlight skittering across the broken walkway, and the monster attacks. 

Welcome to Lawrence, everyone! Our intrepid hero John Winchester misses the sign for home because he’s busy having war flashbacks on the bus. (we’renotgoingtohavesympathyforthisman, we’renotgoingtohavesympathyforthisman, we’renotgoingtohavesympathyforthisman) He takes a few deep breaths to calm himself and then pulls out an envelope with his name on it AND the Men of Letters symbol! 

Ten Years After’s “I’d Love to Change the World” starts playing, and ALL our Jackles longcon spidey-senses kick into overdrive. 

“March 23rd, 1972, the day Dad came home from the war.” 

SCReamIng, FAinTing, DyING. DEAN IS BACK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

Well, in voiceover for now. We watch John walk through Lawrence while Dean tells us he’s going to tell us his parents’ story in a way “that just might surprise [us].” The camera shows us Mary staring quite intently at a movie poster for THX 1138 (“The Future is Here”) before walking away and bumping into John. He’s smitten the moment they meet (So she knocks him flat on his metaphorical ass, I guess.) They talk about candy (GOD, future John, do you care SO little for Dean that you can’t even tell your candy loving son about the most important part of the meeting –THE CANDY?)

They have cute banter and Mary calls him Soldier Boy, which is a delightful wink to the world outside this one.

John walks to Winchester’s Garage, and has a heartfelt reunion with his mother. John grabs himself a beer. (“What? I’m legal now.”) Oh John, this is a path you don’t want to go down. They address the whole John wasn’t old enough to join the Marines situation. (He forged his long lost father’s signature.) And they clarify that he enlisted chasing after said long lost father. (Sidenote: Drake Rodger really has the Sam puppy face down cold!) 

That night, John takes the note and an accompanying key to a mysterious address. 

***DEMON alert!***

Well, John doesn’t know that yet, but once the eyes flash black and he gets picked up by his neck, he knows the guy isn’t Mr. Rogers. 

With a sweep of the leg and a swish of the hair, Mary Campbell saves the day!

Or, she would if John wouldn’t keep getting in the way. He is truly the worst. She eventually dropkicks the demon into a vat of holy water so she can interrogate it in regards to the whereabouts of her father. The demon taunts her over a “Maggie” before Mary exorcises the smoke. I felt a pang of nostalgia hearing those words again. 

“Hey, what was that? No, no, no. His eyes were black and then smoke –smoke just came out of his mouth.” Guys, John is NOT DEALING. 

Mary and John play a game of “what are you doing here?” chicken, and Mary wins (because she’s already a badass). John fills Mary in on his mysterious Biff Tannen encounter. (WHO IS MESSING WITH THE TIMELINE??) This note was the first he’s heard from his father in 15 years (Spoiler John: He’s in the future, and dead.)

Mary leads John to a building labeled with another Men of Letters symbol and guarded with a devil’s trap. Mary needs John to use his key to open the door so she can keep searching for her father. Once inside, they head down a flight of winding stairs. Mary tells John she’s been a hunter of demons (and monsters) since she was a kid. John asks if she knew of Henry Winchester. “No, sorry.” “Maybe he was one of these paranormal freemasons.” “There’s no such thing.” The flirty, combative vibe is strong with these two. This whole episode is a rollercoaster of reconciling past emotions with current ones. 

They stop flirting long enough to look around and see that they’re in a long abandoned room (a bunker, if you will). They start rooting around and John finds Henry’s locker. It’s been preserved in time. John tells the VERY DEPRESSING story about how when he was a kid, he thought there was a monster under his bed, and Henry told him not to worry, he knew how to trap it. (I AM NOT curled up in a ball crying over Sam’s own monster in the closet story. *crying noise**crying noise*) John grabs a bunch of Henry’s things and Mary miraculously finds the file she needs on her first try. Magic.

John keeps pestering Mary about what all of this means. They’re outside the movie theater again, and he asks for her name. She tells him that “you don’t want any part of this life.” She starts walking away and he tells her his name. She tells her soldier boy to go home, the camera panning up to show Slaughterhouse 5 on the marquee. 

Lubbock, Texas

Ada Monroe, Samuel Campbell’s mysterious contact, looks over a document in her rare bookstore. The lights flicker. She grabs her anti-possession charm and runs, but trips and doesn’t have enough time to grab the charm again before she’s possessed! Sam and Dean getting tattoos was the smartest thing they ever did. 

The next morning, John has a case! He wants to find Ada, the only woman who might have a lead on both their dads.

***Library Alert***

Mary takes John to their local library for research. “I need some iron and buckshot,” she tells the library worker behind the desk. They appear to know each other since Mary easily slides behind the desk. Latika meets John and we meet Latika (Lata to her friends.) Mary catches Lata up on Samuel’s recent shenanigans. 

She tells her they’re heading to Lubbock to find out more. Lata wants to come but Mary vetoes her interest. She suggests having another hunter join –Carlos. Mary is VERY against that (Tupelo, and all.)  

On the road, Mary’s driving and John has more war flashbacks. He remembers a moment when he tried saving his friend Murph’s life. Murph steps on a landmine anyway. John sees Murph sitting in the backseat of the car. Mary breaks up his PTSD attack and asks about it. He thinks he’s haunted, but she reassures him, with her EMF reader, that he is just suffering some good old fashioned serious war fatigue. Mary tells him she still sees all the people she couldn’t save. BONDING. 

John and Mary make it to the bookshop, papers and the smell of sulfur everywhere, but no Ada. They hear someone call for Mary and they run outside to find a demon waiting. 

Hello, Carlos! He hits the demon with his van and enters the scene like a boss.

Mary reluctantly introduces John to Carlos while Carlos grabs John for some serious hunter work. He shoots the demon with a water gun filled with holy water, sprinkles salt around the incapacitated demon, and tells John to recited the description of one delicious sandwich, oh wait, the exorcism script. 

“Jimmi, Janice, Jim Morrison, Amen.” And with that, John(athon) performed his first exorcism. 

They head back inside where John and Mary exchange not-quite-longing-stares. Ooh, la, la. (Ugh, I can’t, they’re really cute but the future weighs so heavy on them.) Mary is confused over how long her dad has been hunting alone. 

Lata and Carlos look for clues and talk about Lata’s relative newness to hunting. We establish that Carlos is a free-wheeling bisexual man who shares Mary’s taste in men. (Eyeballs emoji) Lata finds a book open to a VERY IMPORTANT page. It illustrates the box Samuel was after and shows exactly how it works. So convenient!

The box is a ghostbusters backpack monster trap that sucks monsters in and kills them.

Carlos finds a slip of paper tucked into the book. Mary quickly realizes that her father scrawled coordinates that direct them to New Orleans. Mary demands the keys to Carlos’ van - and I feel emotions about John Winchester’s later first choice of vehicle being a minibus. 

Lata pages through the book in the van, and explains how it works to Mary. She also establishes that Mary is protective about her friends. Lata is determined to search for Samuel out of a sense of obligation - Samuel saved her life. Mary wants Lata to just walk away and save herself. The ghost of Mary’s dead cousin rises between them (metaphorically).

In the back of the van, Carlos and John bond. Carlos quickly peels back his carefree exterior by revealing that his whole family was killed by ghouls - thus, his introduction into hunting. 

For I’m in Love with Him Your Honor Science:

John bats his great big innocent eyes and asks if all hunters start out in tragedy. “The only thing worse than how it starts for a hunter is how it ends,” Carlos tells him. Fucking TRUTH, man. 

The denizens of the Mystery Machine survey the cemetery.

Lata tries to soothe John’s (her) nerves. First hunts go GREAT. Being an amateur is the most effective armor you can find! John comforts her, and they bond while Mary looks on and tries to repress her emotions (#relatable). 

John reveals that this is his second cemetery visit of the week. I question why he isn’t going to a cemetery EVERY day because cemeteries are cool. Er, anyway. We learn the story of Maggie - she was Mary’s cousin and a vampire killed her just as her life was starting. Mary didn’t sign up for the war hunt, but John sure did. (Natasha: I know that people are concerned about sweet little innocent baby John becoming beloved by audiences despite his later blatant child abuse and neglect. To them I say, the seeds of John’s destructive obsession have already been planted in this first episode, and we can love him and hurt for him and also very much hate him because the story exists real-time across all these timelines we’ve watched.)

Mary finds traces of her dad by a strange well cap, marked by Men of Letters symbology. They haul it open and drop a flaming torch down, down, down. “Is no one else weirded out by the fact that there’s a giant hole in the ground of an above ground cemetery?” Lata asks. I’d personally like to know about the MoL magical hydrology.

John and Mary hurl themselves down the pit. They definitely seem matched in recklessness! John picks up the torch from the wet stone floor, astoundingly still lit, and they try to pinpoint the alarming growl that echoes through the caverns. 

Upstairs, Carlos reads symbols on the side of the well and then disappears on Lata. Er, oops.

John and Mary discover the mystical monster-eating box in the extremely elaborately crafted caverns. A monster - a loup garou - greets them with snarly drooly fangs. While John and Mary flee from it, Mary drops a little bit of “silver blade” lore - that’s how to kill it. John whips out a knife (NOT a silver blade) and cuts his friend’s necklace fragment from his skin while Mary looks on in astonishment, horror, etc.

John’s going to buy Mary time. He races off with his little bit of silver necklace, and Mary tears away for the mouth of the well. 

Lata gets confronted by a demon-possessed Ada, but Carlos shows up just in time to squirt her with his never-fail water gun. Unfortunately, his water gun doesn’t fully de-mojo the demon and he gets magically chucked across the room. Mary hauls herself up the well, having passed her gym class rope course with flying colors.

John’s facing his end in front of the loup garou when Mary throws the knife down into a puddle of water down in the pit. Mary gets Lata to open the box. John finds the silver blade. And both baddies are quickly disposed of. John slices off the head of the loup garou without hesitation. Meanwhile, the demon gets magically sucked into the box. Yum yum!

Back at the garage, John’s mom goes through Henry’s things. John’s accusatory - he’s mad that his mom kept Henry’s secrets from her. She defends herself - she was just trying to build a good home for herself and her family. “I knew I would do anything to keep you safe,” she says. “Maybe one day when you have kids you’ll understand.” OUCH. ouch. John thinks his dad was trying to keep him safe, and clearly leans towards Henry’s mission. John hands his mom Henry’s letter and apologizes for not showing her HER HUSBAND’S last missive sooner. Yeah, that seems like some pretty typical John Winchester secrets shit.

John loves the mission - good versus evil. “Saving people, hunting things. I was born to do this.”

John’s all in on the hunting gig, and he joins Mary’s merry band. Lata and Carlos show up. Mary commends their work on the recent hunt. Mary Campbell hands out coffees to each of them like final roses. (She’s prepared their coffee in the way each of them likes it because she’s a magical sunflower.)

They meet with Ada, who tells them that Henry last visited her to find something to kill the Akrida. The Akrida are from another dimension (tentacle joke) and want to destroy everything in the world and take it for themselves. Samuel intended to use the box to stop the Akrida’s invasion. Mary takes the box, and her new group of hunters, and heads out across the country to fulfill her father’s mission. 

Cut to Dean’s narration (third rewatch and I still get chills) telling us that the Akrida are a threat to all of existence. Dean’s investigating, taking notes, and being a VERY GOOD BEAN WHO I LOVE VERY MUCH. “There’s gonna be some surprises. Hell, I’m still trying to find all the puzzle pieces myself. But I’ll explain everything. And until then, I’ll keep picking the music.”

For I’ve Got Him, He’s Right Here Science:

(Boris: He's my best friend, he's my pal, he's my homeboy, my rotten soldier, my sweet cheese, my good time boy.)

Everybody, thank Dean Winchester for picking the music as we get played out of this episode by “I’d love to change the world,” by Ten Years After. YES. GOOD.

__

I’d Love to Quote the World:

I know this story might sound familiar. But I’m gonna put the pieces together in a way that just might surprise you. And in order to do that, I have to start all the way at the beginning.

Is it too late to ask for my licorice back? 

Biiiiig freemason vibes

When I was a kid I thought there was a monster under my bed. My dad used to say, “Don’t worry, son. I know how to trap it.”

There’s no secrets in our family

She’s really a lot meaner when you get to know her

The only thing worse than how it starts for a hunter is how it ends

Is no one else weirded out by the fact that there’s a giant hole in the ground of an above ground cemetery? 

Saving people, hunting things. I was born to do this

__

 Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!

#spnwin #the winchesters #spnwin recap #spnwin spoilers #spn #spnwin 1x01 #mary campbell #john winchester #carlos cervantez #latika desai #dean winchester #millie winchester #the winchesters season 1

[stillhavetodothat]

Replaying Nancy Drew without Cheating - Part 9: Secret of Shadow Ranch

Loving this game is sooo diametrically opposed to who I am to my core (i.e. anti-horse girl), but I just CANNOT help myself. It’s so good. As a former Arizona gal myself, I am enamored with the setting, swept away by the romantic story of Frances Humber and Dirk Valentine’s forbidden love, and love staring a little too long at Dave’s sculpted ass at the chicken coop. I feel like this game is near perfect and I have very few complaints, despite the fact that I actually despise Shorty Thurmond with every fiber of my being. I haven’t hated a character this much since the days of yore, when Louis Chandler’s punchable face and droning voice haunted my nightmares. I have new nightmare fodder now - but I am very appreciative that at least it harkens back to The Shining, which is one of my favorite horror movies of all time.

God, my skin is crawling even just looking at that photo.

Okay, the real question here: was I tempted to cheat playing this game? The answer is no. I am thinking that between DDI, which I recently finished, and SHA, because I have not felt the need to look up any hints, probably just indicates that these are games that I have re-played most often. There was not any moment where I wasn’t sure what I needed to do next; in fact, I’ve come to realize that not playing along with a walkthrough (which I frequently have done) really does you an injustice as a player. It removes the element of immersion, so now, I was actually able to follow the storyline and really appreciate how well-fleshed out the game is. It just FEELS like they put some time into this one, if that makes any sense. It is enough to make me overlook the fact that I am terrified of horses and would never be caught dead riding one solo through the desert in real life.

Here are my thoughts:

1. This was THE FIRST game with this new interface, and it brings a whole new feel to Nancy Drew. The screen is larger, you feel more like you ARE Nancy. With that, of course, came some issues that would eventually be worked out, such as needing to deliberately close your bag every single time you pulled something out of it...made it feel a bit clunky. However, the changes’ good definitely outweighs their bad, and it was fun to feel like I was part of the next generation of HerInteractive.

2. Anyone else wondering how there are so many sticks just laying around, considering the fact that there are no trees on the ranch, and hardly any trees in that desert at all? I’ve never thought of this before, but I think these people would probably be buying firewood in town irl, not just finding it hanging around the yard.

3. Dave is obviously hot, and I have thought this since my childhood, but TEX is a smokeshow. Damn, those deep, rugged voices get me every time (lest we forget my concerning childhood crush on Dexter Egan). Mary Yazzie is a lucky lady, especially since I am inferring from this poster that Tex is very well-endowed. Girth is definitely rife with sexual innuendo. Remember, I know nothing about horses, and some people are reading this and palming their faces, but this is head cannon for me now.

4. Shorty is probably the dumbest culprit ever. I knew it was him back in the day as soon as I saw his stupid maps. The constant beration over his underripe vegetables and the elusive chicken eggs only further drove my hatred for him (without hints in this playthrough - I got thrown out of the house THREE times for picking the wrong vegetables. THREE!!). Shorty’s refusal to do his own job, his gross bald head, the fact that I for some reason have to rely on him every single day for water, him and/or his bank robber friends leaving the key for Nancy to escape from the jail cell within 3 minutes of coming to...I could go on. He is as dumb as a stump.

5. The look on Dave’s and Tex’s faces in this scene is hilarious. We can all relate. Even though lamb ragout sounds really good and I would take it over a burger any day, I have a hard time agreeing when he says that Dave and Tex’s taste buds are as sophisticated as a sand flea’s. This man made me bake a cake myself while he stood at the stove, stiff as a taxidermied bear, stirring at nothing in a pot for 12 hours a day, so I have my doubts as to his talent in the kitchen. “I must confess the man has NO TALENT.”

6. LOVED Dry Creek. It was so creepy that I really did feel nervous whenever I had to go out there, as if the sense of isolation of that town was seeping into me through the screen. Very cool spot. Getting locked in that jail cell was super exciting gameplay too. I give Shorty shit for leaving that key on the hook there, but in this playthrough I definitely knocked the key off the wall and into the floor hole about 4 times before I finally remembered about lassoing the chair. Who’s the dumb one now??

7. This magnet puzzle made me want to kill myself. Ultimately, I just randomly put each piece in each spot until they locked in, since I never did see the pamphlet in Mary’s shop. I thought there would be a better explanation out there as to why the wood pieces are there the first 10ish times you open it, and disappear on the 11thish. Has any game ever just inexplicably taken pity on you like this before? I am trying to think about whether or not I have ever realized that the game does this, or if this is the first time, since every other time I would have solved it the first time I opened it by following a very explicit walkthrough. I do like finding these weird little quirks, which I would never have found if not for this initiative.

8. The WORST puzzle though, not because it was hard but because it was so fucking annoying, was the game inside of Cappy’s after you put in Frances’s cousin’s ring. I had 2 tokens going in, both of which I had gotten playing the original game making a series bad guys with the token from the roadrunner game, and they were quickly gone as I lost twice in a row. I then proceeded to have to go back and play that roadrunner game SEVEN MORE TIMES!! in order to get more tokens to win a game that was purely luck. OMFG. I now have all 3 levels of that roadrunner game memorized. I will likely never forget them. And honestly, cheating wouldn’t have even made this easier.

9. And finally, Dave’s shit-eating grin in this photo at the end of the game, as he watches a mysterious Nancy cloaked in a physically impossible shadow. 

Excellent game. Maybe my favorite so far. Who’s ready to follow along with me as I shit myself in fear as Ethel lurks in the shadows of Blackmoor Manor?

#nancy drew #nancy drew games #nancy drew pc games #secret of shadow ranch #herinteractive

[cassatine]

hello hello beautiful internet people here i be again… to stay, hopefully, but who knows. got kinda overwhelmed by life, feat., among other things:

the neverending spring cleaning of death (i did not see my floor for like a month, it was like a very intense game of the floor is lava but the lava was mostly books)

the fair season of hell (working every weekend for peanuts is deeply uncool, for the record, especially since turns out i am a magnet for every insane conspirationist and "science proves god exists" type, idk what the fuck is up this year but every time i'm reading during the lull hours, be it Bensaïd, Bullough, Guérin, Graeber, or who the fuck ever, some dude or another just has to start reccing full-on wackos and also mansplaining politics and finances and society and vaccines. i'm thinking about swearing off reading nonfiction in public)

me fucking up my wrist and my knee fucking me up (i'm still wearing a brace and also i have to do reeducation; at least it isn't two braces anymore)

me dealing with the post-smoking weight gain (dealing badly, we don't talk about it)

the job agency coming for my ass with a vengeance (i am now incorporated! technically it's in progress, whatever. i had to fill papers. so much paperwork. i guess i am now an entrepeneur, a word that gives me rashes)

Lady Justice coming for our asses with a vengeance (the pigs played great escape in the neighbour's fields one too many time, let us say)

the local crafters' shop coming for my ass with an offer (okay that's excellent but for the timing)

also feat. two anniversaries, that of my reaching Jesus' age, and that of my reaching one whole ass year without smoking or drugs. my present was an extremely late showing of gotg3. i asked for it and thus prompted a month or so of jokes about my going to see a marvel movie, har har har. by being extremely not online for the last month+, i managed to avoid any and all spoilers, which was good excepted for the part where i was not emotionally ready, like, at all.

also new: i put up a huge poster of Louise Michel, atop barricades, with a red flag that says "vive la Commune," on one of my walls, which isn't exactly worth reporting about but is very cool nonetheless. of such small things is joy made etc etc.

#personal #tbd probably

[skulltopcomputer]

I Have So Much To Say About Transmasc Jake English

Disclaimer: This is my opinion- I definitely don’t think you have to interpret Jake this way, both gender and character-wise. Also, this is just for fun (I swear). Although I am interested in working in the confines of canon for as much as possible, I'm not trying to "prove" Jake is transmasc, I'm sure Hussie wrote him as a cis man. Content warnings under read more.

Content warning for discussions of transphobia and misogyny (if I need to add anything else let me know).

Just for context, I believe Jake realized he was a boy very early in his childhood. Thematically, it would be most appropriate shortly after Grandma English dies, so basically, as long as he's been old enough to understand the concept of "gender", he has known he is a boy. (I have a lot of ways that I think transmasc Jake would interact with the text of Homestuck, but that's all you really need to know for this post).

Also I’m going to talk about “the narrative” a lot here, which I'm mostly using to mean the perceived author of Homestuck, that is, the person who writes the narration, controls who to focus on and how the plot plays out, etc. I say "the narrative" instead of "Hussie" because 1. Hussie is a literal character within the comic and I'm not referring to them there and 2. I don't think they intended everything I'm going to say "the narrative" pushes here, even if their vitriol towards Jake was very much deliberate. It's important to have a term for this as Hussie's background as the specific type of Internet Poster they were greatly impacts how Homestuck is written- in Jake's case, how the reader is made to perceive his character.

OK onto the actual analysis.

(One of) the whole point(s) of Jake is that he conceptualizes himself in certain ways that aren't reflected in the reality of his actions. Specifically, he thinks of himself as some grandiose, charismatic action hero, even though in reality he’s just kind of a nerdy teen who watches movies all day. There are many reasons he views himself that way, but most relevantly to this post he’s raised solely on media to influence his worldview, and therefore both consciously and unconsciously assimilates the roles of movie character archetypes onto how he thinks of real people. This is easily mapped onto Jake’s perception of himself as a “man”, as (most of) the men he knows are the rough-and-tumble, kick ass adventure type. He thinks that since these are traits of men, and since he is a man, he must inherently be that way as well- even though in actuality, he's done very little to show it.

By the narrative’s standards, Jake makes a lot of mistakes as someone who wants to be considered a “man”. He idolizes female heroes alongside male ones (most likely influenced by Grandma English’s being his first model of what a hero should be), even going so far as to dress like them. He’s not ashamed of his attraction to men. In fact, he's open about his attraction to what the narrative considers to be abnormal (I know in the real world, an attraction to "blue women" would be regarded as incredibly tame, but considering what Homestuck considers a furry it's safe to say the standard of deviance is rather low. I think the emphasis on Neytiri is meant to accentuate Jake's affinity towards blue woman as "weird", especially as the narration highlights her nonhuman anatomy and she's repeatedly described as "furry"). The narrative punishes him for these traits, often in ironic ways. He is given a skimpy, uncomfortable, god tier outfit meant to objectify him (reminiscent of how women are objectified in the movies he likes), he messes up his relationship with Dirk so bad he convinces himself he's not attracted to anyone*, and he is embarrassingly awkward with the real-life blue alien girl he meets. Sincerity, especially among male characters, is often unforgivable to Homestuck.

*To clarify, what I think is happening when Jake says he's not "capable" of romantic attraction is that he's trying to convince himself he can't feel attraction, because he doesn't want to have a relationship where he hurts people/other people hurt him that bad ever again. I don't think it's "wrong" to interpret him as aromantic, and I especially don't think aromanticism should be treated as a "punishment". I just don't think of him as such.

Jake’s whole SBURB adventure is the narrative repeatedly, humiliatingly tearing down Jake’s perception of himself by placing him into situations wherein he is shown to fail to uphold it, both internally to the characters and externally to the reader. The “charismatic” part of his persona is all but demolished in his conversations with Aranea, as well as his relationships with the Alpha kids in the void session. In the Game Over timeline while Gamzee is fighting Terezi, all Jake can bring himself to do is politely ask him to stop. His most damning blow comes in his confrontation with Crockertier Jane, as he fails twofold at what a “man” would do in his place- he doesn’t want to fight her, and he doesn’t want to have sex with her. His admission of “not wanting to be a man and not wanting to punch her in the face” at BGD’s pestering is the narrative finally succeeding at pressuring him into admitting he’s too weak for the standards of masculinity imposed on him, or put another way, that he’s not a "man” at all. (Relevantly, BGD functions as both a Dirk [a character praised for his adherence to masculinity] analogue and Jake’s internal monologue, proving Jake is aware and ashamed of himself in the moment and that he thinks his friends would most likely judge him too). Once the narrative has proven Jake has failed at the standards of masculinity, it forces him into what he, and the reader, would understand as positions typically held by female characters in media (objectifying him, assaulting him, etc.).

Jake is often treated as “silly” and “stupid”, both outright and insidiously. He's the kid who grew up on an island, isolated from society, and therefore doesn't understand how the world "really" operates. He also shares Caliborn's unspecified "learning disorder", which in the narrative's terms, is just another reason he's out of touch. The more characters who think of him as stupid or ignorant, the more Jake's autonomy is diminished- how can he claim to know anything about his identity when he so disconnected from reality? Jake's continual crying falls into this too, as large displays of emotions are often conflated with stupidity, or at the very least irrationality.

All of this is so resonant for me as a transmasc person, especially since Homestuck is so influenced by internet culture. I was never a forum goer but I did a lot of digital self harm on Reddit and the sentiment that transmasc people are stupid, fanciful, confused teen girls that only want to be men because they want to imitate characters in media is (was? I try not to go on Reddit anymore) very common in those types of spaces. (This is amplified if you read Jake as autistic [as I do] as the “confused autistic teen girl” is unfortunately a very prevalent transphobic stereotype). Anyone who did not live up to a very specific caliber of toxic masculinity (wearing only masculine clothes, being attracted exclusively to women, repressing grand acts of emotions, etc.) was labeled as faking, and often subject to misogynistic harassment. I hope by now you can see how this connects to Jake.

(One of the reasons) why John's conversation with Jake in Act 6 Act 6 is so important to resolving his character is that John shows Jake that there's more than one way to be a man. John introduces a new type of masculinity to Jake, that of a "side kick", evidently referencing Robin, as he contrasts this archetype with "bat man". He recontextualizes his outfit meant to objectify him as something this character would wear. Robin- and therefore this role of the "side kick"- is still very much a male character who is allowed to be male even though he's goofy instead of a chiseled, emotionally repressed paradigm of masculinity. Jake shows a lot of joy at inhabiting this idea.

In summary, transmasc Jake is an extrapolation of the themes of how the narrative punishes Jake for not meeting the expectations of masculinity put upon him. There are other reasons why I view Jake as transmasc, but this is the most important one to me, as it's the most poignant. There are few stories that portray the experience of growing up on the internet, fewer specifically with a transmasculine lens, and even fewer that discuss the hardships of doing so in both cases. Ironically, the narrative's contempt towards Jake made for a more realistic, and therefore more evocative, experience for me.

Of course, not all transmasc people are going to view it that way, so please don't generalize. I like seeing negative experiences reflected in media, but not all people do. Also, I don't want to give Hussie credit for all of this- some (probably most) of what I talked about was legitimately intended to be bigoted, or at least rooted in bigoted assumptions. Homestuck is a text you should read critically, as it is embedded in its author's history, for the better and for the worse.

This isn’t even the tip of the iceberg concerning both transmasc Jake and especially Jake analysis in general so hopefully more posts to come. Also, despite the fact I didn’t go into them much as characters in this post, know I am a staunch Jane and Dirk defender (crockertier Jane is not really representative of Jane and BGD is not really representative of Dirk. I also don't think Jake is perfect or anything). They are also both transmasc but that's a post for a different day.

#jake english #homestuck #transmasc jake english #shuttle's writing

[thebookowal]

I think I should just throw it out. There is a random information.

because Ivy cursed the person who made this movie to burn in hell because he have created such a terrifying plan whoever wants to be a killer

well, I mean, if your sergeant and you are a psycho, then probably you would think of it as a very good plan to keep in mind

The human centipede

three movies of that shit exist

and you guys think “oh! it’s just really scary movie it’s really realistic and have a good quality!” well, actually, no

there’s a lot of things wrong about this movie and basically the name is one of them

(it has warnings it will actually might cause fear of centipedes Chilopodophobia and it can cause depression, anxiety, and it can cause many many things shit this movie I think it have more than one poster that have more than one warning hafe the poster is a warning God dammit)

what , more terrifying and will get you absolutely terrifying and I’ll be able to sleep at night

Which I’m not proud to be the cause of it

that it can be possible

no, not I mean in your dream is Orion your nightmares are in your head no, I mean it’s actually can be possible

The Director talked with actual surgeons and ask them. “How can we able to make a human centipede” and they just told him “it’s easy it’s just buy a couple steps and *chef kiss *voilà”

(that’s not really how it went, but he did actually ask them how to make it come to life)

0_0

so we’re in danger

every single time I-

end and I can’t actually just avoid thinking about it or avoid seeing it, but there’s something completely wrong with me and my imagination I could just imagine pain that doesn’t actually exist in my body

like at some point, I thought that was something crawling on my hand, and when I looked, there was nothing and I keep scratching it but the crawling thingy didn’t stop !!!

so imagine just getting tied up in both sides both end of your body

I actually just imagine being a part of it at some point through this fear, and I still do and I felt weird thing around my mouth and on my booty

and I cannot sleep at all. I think about this literally every night of my life and I get always terrified and I would imagine I’m just looking at me and tell me that I will join them. What the fuck

why is this happening to me? I literally try to keep my head away from it but it’s always keeps going and going and it doesn’t stop

at some point I thought OK this is probably because it’s my favorite I said there’s no way because before I write this post I just decided to you know see if it was really my favorite if I can handle the poster and I couldn’t I actually do feel like throwing up

and God dammit did the movie just let me learn wanna listen

well, two but one of them we already know “do not talk to strangers do not get inside stranger house is even if they offered “

but the one that I learned from, do not hold your poop do not hold your need of waste disposal

even it was pee or poo. Do not

i’m not even going to tag the stupid ass movie because of the nightmare that I managed to have

God, dammit I was fucking middle of a fucking heard a whole fucking line of people just being a fucking centipede this is a fucking NIGHTMARE!!!

#Stupid ass rumbles #I hate that movie so much #Even saying #its name makes me gag