#god oot link my lord | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

uneasedregrets · 1 year

Text

Hyrule's Religiosity, the Hero of Time, and You

So, inspired by Ansem's post, & because I have Thoughts™, I wanted to type this up. While it isn't written in universe, I'm sure I'll end up doing footnotes anyway so I can get the main points across without going on aside after aside.(that's a lie I'm gonna anyway fair warning)

So this post is gonna be broken up into smaller parts about specific topics. I'm gonna be talking about religion, the intersection & mixing of religions, & the legend of the hero of time existing before Link goes on his quest. Buckle up because we're going deep. This is also a very long post; sitting at just under 2,400 words. Sorry not sorry.

Trianity

So, airlifted from Ansem's post linked above, the religion of Hyrule is Trianity. I'm going to expand that to most of the known world worships some kind of Trianity; at least as far as humans & Hylians are concerned*. I will also airlift the idea that it broadly resembles Christianity, but I would probably add in some Shinto practices & beliefs. Not because the games are made in Japan, but more to do with the storylines & themes found in each game ( restoring the balance of nature is a common one in most Zelda games ). This includes the various offshoots that have occured over the years, such as Golden Trianity ( with a focus on the Golden Goddesses above all ), Hyland Trianity ( with a focus on Hylia above all ), & Nohansen Trianity ( which places emphasis on the sages & oracles in a similar capacity to the saints in real world Catholicism )†. Again, a lot of this was covered in Ansem's post so read that goes into more details because the broad notes are the same here.

I do disagree with the take that the Goddess of Time is a lesser power in the Trianity pantheon††. It's more likely in my mind that ( insofar as OoT is concerned at least ) she is the goddess of travels as well; most real world gods represent more than one thing. I'll get into this more when talking about the 'mythical' Hero of Time, but in my mind the legend dealt with her giving that Hero of Time the powers to travel through time.

Trianity, like Christianity, would probably place a large emphasis on prayer instead of offerings like more ancient religions do.

While I believe the other species in Hyrule's world ( which should really have a name ) have their own religions, & I don't believe Trianity is actively denying those religions ( unlike Christianity but quite like older polytheistic religions that would apply their gods to those they encountered ), I do believe that religious officials pressure those species to change their ways & also for the Royal Family to do the same.

Older Religions ( for lack of a better term )

Another point I disagree with Ansem ( sorry babe ) is the idea that Lord Jabu-Jabu is a part of Nohansen Trianity. He is specifically referred to as the 'patron deity of the Zora', & also appears in Oracle of Ages, in Labrynna, in a similar role. While he could certainly be folded into Trianity, I don't think this is the case. I believe the guardian spirits ( Great Deku Tree, Lord Jabu-Jabu, Goddess of Sands, Fierce Deity, etc. ) are more representative of older religions or are otherwise outside Trianity.

Side note: it is stated by a gossip stone in Ocarina of Time that the Gerudo 'worship Ganondorf almost like a god'. I am unsure if I'd put this as an actual religious practice ( i.e. before Ganondorf in Ocarina of Time became The Big Bad™, if Gerudo actually worshipped their first male in a hundred years. Sidestepping how gross & weird this idea is) or if it was something instituted by either Twinrova or Ganondorf himself to ensure loyalty amongst his subjects. Ganondorf does go on to be worshipped by Zant in Twilight Princess, & by the Deku in Four Swords Adventures but that seems to be something Ganondorf convinced them of, not a statement to his actual divinity.

I'll probably make a more in-depth post about this later, but despite Termina being a land made by skull kid & Majora's Mask ( according to the Encyclopedia & this blog ), I think the Giants that are central to that game's story are actual primeval divinities worshipped by ancient hylians & / or humans. As the Encyclopedia & game contradict each other ( if the world was created by skull kid & Majora's Mask, how was he friends with the Giants? If he knew of them from Hyrule where are other references to them? ), I'm choosing to make up that, as the land of Termina has 'its own distinct culture, which is perhaps influenced by Majora's ancient tribe' ( Encyclopedia pg. 36 ), that the Giants were the gods of whatever land Majora came from ( presumably predating Hyrule as the mask was ancient by the time of the Era of Time ). I could see them being the protectors of those who were left behind by Hylia when she yeeted Skyloft into the air. Alternatively be the gods previously worshipped in some far flung land, where people had fled to escape the divine conflict. I need to sit on it more but I thought it bore mentioning here.¶

As evidenced in Ocarina of Time, these older religions place gods much closer to their worshippers. The Great Deku Tree is the father to the Kokiri, you can go & see him & Lord Jabu-Jabu, & both the Four Giants & Fierce Deity§ appear in their homeland's greatest hour of need. They are neither omnipotent nor are they silent like the Golden Goddesses, but they are implied to be impressively powerful.

Evil Divinities

Okay, last stop before we talk about the Hero of Time I promise. Ignoring the racism of Hylians in Ocarina of Time, there are several beings I'd classify as 'evil divinities'. Majora & Demise are obvious, but I'd also like to thrown in Bellum & Malladus in this section. Majora isn't directly called a god anywhere in the game or even the manga, only that a 'great power' lay in the mask. While we can assume Majora was a divinity in the ancient tribe's pantheon, it isn't expressed. I mean the same is with Demise & Malladus, though Zelda Wiki tells me that Bellum is referred to as an 'evil dream god'. That is without a citation & I don't feel like sitting through a playthrough of Phantom Hourglass to find it so take it with a grain of salt.

These examples almost all use the epithet of 'Demon King', so it's possible they are corruptions of other deities that either Trianity or the Royal Family desired to make look worse. Of course the idea is worth speculating on but outside the scope of this post. I think they do still have small followings sprinkled throughout the world ( with Majora cultists taking my Time's eye ), & these are usually the ones responsible for their return.

I should also note that I am hesitant to separate Ganon & Demise, as Ganon is simply the reincarnation of Demise's hatred, or a transformation of Ganondorf when he has the Triforce of Power. The idea is an interesting one but I'm unsure. Just wanted to note here that I can see Ganon as being a god of sorts to the various blin species in Hyrule, but am not 100% sold on it as from a timeline sense Ganon is named after Ganondorf, though from a developmental standpoint it's the other way around.

The Hero of Time Myth

Okay so! It's implied in Ocarina of Time as well as in the manga that by the events of the game, The Hero of Time is a legendary hero; a title of sorts to any hero of Hyrule who travels through time if I had to guess as the source material is frustratingly vague on this point. In the manga, the young Princess Zelda says the Hero of Time will save her, to which Ganondorf responds by thinking 'what a stale old superstition', meaning to me that it has to have been imbedded in Hyrulean folklore for a significant period of time. Whether this predated the founding of the actual kingdom of Hyrule following the Interloper War, or had arisen during the period of time when Hyrule was first colonized by Skyloftians, is the question. Both ideas interest me; if it was a story told by those Skyloftian colonists & their descendants, it could have arisen as an alternative name or some other kind of corruption for the Hero of the Skies as he travels through time in Skyward Sword. Alternatively it could be the name of a hero who traveled through time during the Interloper War, as that period seems ripe for an Incarnation of Demise, Spirit of the Hero, & the Bloodline of the Goddess to come into conflict. Perhaps that 'Ganon' was an Interloper? Could be an explanation for Zant accepting him as a god, millennia later.

In either case, I believe the myth would eventually incorporate this nameless Goddess of Time, if it didn't at the start||. Perhaps in the role of a guide for a wayward hero to travel through time with, perhaps simply as their patron, perhaps as the one who sends the Hero of Time through time. In any case, this would be why Zelda in the Era of Time, who is familiar with the myth of the Hero of Time, would know the Goddess of Time. This would especially be a good explanation if you follow the idea that the Goddess of Time is a lesser divinity in the Trianity pantheon. This hypothetical original Hero of Time would have been the one to place the Master Sword in its pedestal, cementing its connection with him.

Of course, this is assuming there is a historical figure who would become warped into a legend. It is just as possible that the Hero of Time was purely fictional before the events of Ocarina of Time. Both are possible, but a lot of legends in this series have some truth to them so I think it fits better if the Hero of Time myth was based in some historical event.

* There is a difference between humans & Hylians, however slight it might be. As far as I'm aware it's their pointed ears, which allows them to hear the voice of the goddesses, as it's implied that they have a similar lifespan to humans. Also for purposes of this blog, I'm going to work off the assumption that humans are the main population of Labrynna & Holodrum as the sprites seem to imply that the residents there have rounded ears.

†Not that I expect it to come up on the blog, but I'd like to state that I think Hyland Trianity is popular in Hyrule during the Era of the Wilds, with Golden Trianity being popular in New Hyrule ( from Spirit Tracks; I like to think it's a separate country by the time BotW rolls around ) & Nohansen Trianity coming to prominence in Labrynna & Holodrum. I'm sure there was some kind of religious schism to cause these distinctions but that's neither here nor there.

††I'm sure, like most pantheons, there's drift throughout the ages of who are the 'main' gods. Naturally the Golden Goddesses would remain prominent if not center stage, with Hylia drifting in & out of prominence. The Goddess of Time could be in a similar boat if we don't ascribe that title to another Goddess. Then, of course, you have the nature spirits that are separate from mortals yet still worshipped in some capacity ( think like naiads or fairies ); Volvagia is the spirit of Death Mountain, the Light Spirits in Twilight Princess are another example.

¶ Also, I'm currently undecided if I think the names of the bosses in Majora's Mask are the names of the Giants or if they're the name of the bosses. On one hand, they'd have names. On the other, Odolwa being the name of the god of Deku is interesting, if redundant; the Great Deku Tree would be a much better fit for good-aligned Deku. If I go with the later idea, I'd probably make the Four Giants be named after the four cardinal directions, as they hold up the sky ( moon but hush ) like the four dwarves in Norse Mythology who are also named after the four cardinal directions.

§Oh man do I have Thoughts™ on Fierce Deity. I'll probably make a post later, but while I will agree he represents the feelings of all the people of Termina, he is also said to be equally as dangerous as Majora himself. Yet how did Majora get a hold of him? If we accept the manga backstory to Majora as canon, the man who is implied to become the Fierce Deity Mask is a god with control over time. Hmm... many Thoughts™...

||Religious history, especially with a history as convoluted as the Zelda series', is hard. It's especially hard when you lack any primary sources to check yourself against. If Trianity did come from Skyloft originally, the original form would presumably be Hyland Trianity, due to the importance of Hylia in the religion. This doesn't sit right with me, as there's no reason that I can think of as to why Hyland Trianity would fall out of favor for Golden Trianity without just pulling something out my ass. However, if we assume that Rauru, in building the Temple of Time to protect the Sacred Realm, introduced a more structured religion based around the Golden Goddesses alone & either left out or downplayed Hylia until she was forgotten, then it would make more sense to me that Golden Trianity would fall out of favor by the time of the Era of the Wilds, as that Hyrule seems much more aware of its past. Archeological discoveries of shrines to Hylia could very well have shifted religious thought in Hyrule, whereas New Hyrule with its deeper connection to the foundations of Golden Trianity, would continue to follow that branch. As Nohansen Trianity involves the sages & oracles, it serves Holodrum & Labrynna, where the oracles of Din & Nayru are most heavily associated with, quite well.

#long post tw #[Voice of the Goddess || Mun & OoC]#[Song for the Hero of Time || Headcanons]#[ This wasn't supposed to be this long but I just went off ]#[ Sometimes you just gotta get those Thoughts out ya know? ]#[ To be fair to Ocarina of Time they weren't racist in that ]#[ It was the Encyclopedia that claimed hylians thought gerudo religion was evil ]#[ Man that book is such a mixed bag ]#[ It also claims the Kokiri were originally Hylians which like ]#[ No ???? ]#[ Also the reason stated in that book as to why most people in MM resemble people from Hyrule ]#[ Is that the landscape was from Majora's memories and the people from skull kid's ]#[ Still opens more plot holes than it closes but it's interesting enough. ]

9 notes · View notes

scotianostra · 2 years

Photo

On August 25th 1776 the Philosopher David Hume died.

In his books on philosophy, Hume said that many of our beliefs do not come from reason. Instead, they come from our instincts or feelings. For example, reason does not tell us that one thing causes another. Instead, we see one thing and then we see another, and we feel a link between the two. Similarly, reason does not tell us that someone is a good person. Instead, we see that the person is kind and friendly, and we feel a special moral feeling. Because Hume thought that these beliefs do not come from reason, people call him a “skeptical” or “anti-rationalist” philosopher.

His scepticism went as far as religion, when it was dangerous to question the existence of god and the vast majority of people were believers.

There’s a wee anecdote Hume himself used to recount, he told the story t that on his way back to the Old Town after visiting his New Town house, while it was still being built, he lost his footing he fell knee-deep into mud at the Nor’ Loch, it was being drained at the time and was more a Nor’ Bog than Loch, (it is now Princes Street Gardens) he was so stuck he could not get out on his own and finally gave a cry for help.

An old fishwife is said to have went to his aid but on recognising him as “Hume the Atheist” refused to help, Hume implored,

“But my good woman, does not your religion as a Christian teach you to do good, even to your enemies?"

"That may well be,” she replied. “But ye shallnae get oot o’ that, till ye become a Christian yersell, and repeat the Lord’s Prayer and the Belief!"

Did he stand his ground and ridicule the superstitious beliefs of this woman? Of course not. To the surprise of the fishwife, he readily complied, and true to her word she helped him out of the bog.

Hume was a careful planner and long before he died he left the following instructions in his will:

“.........I also ordain that, if I shall dye any where in Scotland, I shall be bury’d in a private manner in the Gallon Church Yard (also known as the Calton graveyard), the South Side of it, and a Monument be built over my Body at an Expence not exceeding a hundred Pounds, with an Inscription containing only my Name with the Year of my Birth and Death, leaving it to Posterity to add the Rest.”

His request would be fulfilled, although later additions and alterations would mar the dignified simplicity of Hume’s vision. Before his monument could be built, however, the great Skeptic and Empiricist, had to be buried in the plot he had secured for himself in Calton.

Here’s how economist and friend Adam Smith described Hume’s final days in a letter to Hume’s literary executor, William Strahan;

‘The placid, even cheerful death of so prominent an irreligious figure drew a great deal of public attention. Crowds assembled outside his house waiting to hear if he would change his mind about the improbability of an afterlife once death came a-knockin’.’

After his burial, his friends stood guard at the grave site, pistols cocked and torches aloft, for eight days and nights to ensure his grave would not be desecrated or interfered with. It’s said that some of the curious hid behind gravestones to see if the Devil himself would come and spirit away the man James Boswell dubbed “the Great Infidel.”

By 1778, Adam’s vision of Roman-inspired cylindrical mausoleum much like those found on the Appia Antica, complete with pre-fab decay, had been construction over Hume’s burial spot and an adjacent lot bought by the philosopher’s brother John. Robert Adam used unpolished masonry and rough ashlar to convey the impression of classical antiquity. Over the doorway was the simple inscription Hume had requested: “DAVID HUME, NATUS APRIL. 26. 1711. OBIIT AUGUST 25. 1776” At some point before 1813, for reasons lost in the mists of time, someone replaced the Latin “NATUS” with “BORN” and “OBIIT” with “DIED.”

After that, some more wording was added even less in keeping with Hume’s vision. Hume’s nephew, a famous jurist also named David Hume, erected a memorial to his wife Jane Alder after her death in 1816. Her name was inscribed on funerary urn in a niche about the door and captioned with:

“Behold I come quickly Thanks be to GOD which giveth us the victory, through our LORD JESUS CHRIST.”

Somewhere between then and 1820 yet another inscription was added just below the tablet, this one noting that the tomb was “Erected in Memory of Him/ in 1778” because by then the mausoleum had become something of a family vault, so its original purpose needed reiterating. During the mid-19th century, a metalwork cross was erected on a plinth above the keystone. The date 1841 is inscribed on it, perhaps indicating when the cross was added, perhaps in memoriam of Hume’s nephew David who had died in 1838. The cross was gone by the 1880s.

With Adam’s incorporating decay into the original design, plus all the later activity, plus the passage of time, Hume’s mausoleum was in dire need of cleaning and maintenance. The City of Edinburgh Council and Edinburgh World Heritage, plus a of private donors, pulled together to sponsor a a proper conservation of the mausoleum in 2011, the 300th anniversary of Hume’s birth.

Conservators focused on clearing vegetation and mortar pointing to replace crumbling mortar with fresh, durable lime. Particular attention was paid to the decorative elements on the cornice, architrave, and frieze around the top of the structure.

A spokesman for Edinburgh World Heritage said: “The Hume mausoleum is of great importance to the city and Scotland. Designed by the famous architect Robert Adam to commemorate the nation’s foremost philosopher, it neatly encapsulates Edinburgh’s history as a city at the heart of the Enlightenment. This sort of conservation work is essential to keep the building in good order for the future, and to encourage more people to appreciate the value of the city’s historic graveyards.”

This was accomplished for the bargain price of £5,000, I think he would have approved.

#Scotland #scottish #philosopher #historian #the scottish enlightenment #history

18 notes · View notes

lumberjackloverboy-moved · 1 year

Note

what's your favorite link incarnation and why!

oooooooooh my god oohhhhhhhh my god okay okay okay

so my fav link tends to shift to whatever game i'm currently playing, but my current big three are skyward sword link, wind waker link, and botw link. i also ADORE the idea behind the first hero/first link

so with skyward sword, i just get so emotional thinking about moving from Sky Utopia to life or death situations like *that*. we know that the knights of skyloft protect the people of skyloft, but it's from like. chuchus. keese. those are NOT real threats and other than that the knights seem to be more symbolic than actually useful (i think they serve to honor the first hero but that's just my headcanon) so while link has been trained w sword/shield he has never faced real combat. like. ever. he's what? 17, 18? All that time training with training dummies and maaaaybe sparring will NOT prepare you for facing a demon lord almost as soon as you start your adventure. he is not prepared in any way shape or form, and has no time to! that is asking so fucking much of a teenager!!!!! and then impa (my beloved) calls him out on that, which ooooooof. god i was so upset when i played the first time. im replaying rn and omg omg omg i forgot how much i missed itttttt

okay okay if you follow the Main (@transgender-herooftime) you know that a few weeks ago i went off the Fucking Deep end talking abt ww link, the ONLY link not chosen by the gods, just some kid, some lil guy, who wants to save his sister and accidentally gets ot save the world in the process. constantly compaired ot the hero of time by the deku tree, by valuu, by the king of red lions, by fucking JABUN (MY BELOATHED) and doubted at each turn that bc he ist oot link/decended/whatever he will fail as a hero. and guess what bitch@!!!! he stabs! ganon! in the head!!!! FUCKIN TAKE THAT JABUN

botw link........ my bloved..... not my fav link but def the one whoes character i have written the most. wrote like a 120k fic abt him that i still nhold dear to this day and i put so much thought into his characterization in that. i dont mind botw zelink but god above i want more people to explore them being uncomfortable w eachother bc they are both not the same people htey were a hundred years aho and AHHH can we pls explore hte complexcities of their relationships instead of jumping straight to shipping please and thank you <33333

annnnnnnnnnnny ways yeah this is illegable but i am. Manic. and it makes words hard. thank you for asking tho <3333333 loz is my biggest si and AHHHHHHHHH i love it

3 notes · View notes

bugcatcherwill · 2 months

Note

Who’s leading the yiga up on the surface if kohda is in the pit?

Link’s going to feel so bad but then again so are the guards so he’s not alone.

But I am going to laugh my ass off if ganondorf joins the rescue party for the following reasons: wants to be on the geurdos good side thus saving their chief will help, he seems to have a bond with Rezek and second he hears both captured by a group that worship the malice yeah…having him show up will cause the yiga to question a lot of stuff XD

Yiga: lord ganondorf the benevolent one!?~ you have returned I must tell master kohda “runs into the base”

Ganondorf: what in the golden goddesses and Hylia name?!? I have a cult “looks at link like when did this happen (the yiga weren’t much of a thing in the area of OoT)” boy this would have been a good thing to tell me before hand….

Link: must have slipped my mind when we were fighting a ARMY OF WIZZROBES!

Ganondorf: that’s a good reason “they are let into the hideout despite link being with him but that is due to ganondorf is the yiga’s benevolent one and if the hero is there probably there is a reason but for the sake of showing that link is harmless ganondorf has the sword and link’s hands tied and whispers to link” remember we get the chief and the wizzrobe and get out I don’t wanna hang around too long.

I'm writing it so that the Yiga have a sort of splintered leadership where Kohga is the top banana (heh) and has branching strong vice-leaders that control their own squads. Like how Wren was in charge of his own squad, and the other unnamed Yiga Commander in this latest chapter. I figured it'd make sense to have a system like that rather than the Yiga running around like a decapitated chicken the second Kohga falls in the hole lmao

And God, I'm already drafting how Ganondorf thinks of the whole Yiga crew. Because they're completely free of Malice he'd have no way of knowing about them in his 10,000+ years in Gay Baby Jail. And plus they only were formed after the Divine Beasts were initially created. So with his age they're basically new.

It's honestly a 50-50 of whether they go full bootlicking or call him a false prophet and either way it'll be hilarious jhlkadfs

#ratc ask #ratc lore dump

1 note · View note

spoonyruncible · 2 years

Text

I finally get why I've heard so many people say that Link is autistic. I'm playing Ocarina of Time for the first time and in two social interactions when someone expressed affection Link just straight up bolted, screaming in one case as he escaped an incoming group hug.

#i never had consoles growing up #so i missed out on this franchise #i was always kinda tangentially aware of it as a thing #like i knew most of the monsters names and stuff #but i never played until the ds games #then griffin mcelroy did his stupid guy fieri link to the past randomizer #so i obviously had to play link to the past #and it was great #it was as great as everyone said it would be #it was obnoxiously good for such an old game #and i pretty much decided as soon as i beat it to play all the zelda games #and right now i'm on OOT #i love this mute twink so much #he'll do literally anything any random person asks him to do #dear god i hate the camera though #i get it #the n64 is a fossil #but dear lord i have been injured by the camera so many times now #also by my own ineptitude #i'm having fun and that's what matters

17 notes · View notes

ibrithir-was-here · 2 years

Text

I'm bored and wanna post something so here, have some of my Zelda Headcanon Word Doc, including Timeline and Character Bios that include each Link and Zelda's parents name along with possible siblings cuz I don't know when to stop

My timeline:

Creation of world by 3 Goddess, creation of Triforce

Era of Hylia (3000 years)

Chosen Hero battles against Demise's forces, loses life. Hylia chooses to be reborn as a human

1,000 years later Skyward Sword

300 years of peace then

Era of Chaos/Interlopers War--Banished to Twilight Realm/Raru builds Temple of Time and seals the Sacred Realm.

Era of Prosperity --Hyrule Kingdom and royal family established (300 years)

Force Era --Demons rise again, and the Picori/Minish descend from the sky to grant the Hero of Men the Picori Blade

100 years later --Minish Cap, Vaati becomes a Demon and the Picori Blade is made into the 4 Sword. Later this Link faces Vaati again as an adult, sealing Vaati in the 4 Sword

4 generations laters/100 years 4 Sword happens, new Link seals Vaati again in the 4 Sword

Labyrinna ruled by Queen Ambi (Sir Raven around--son of 4 Sword Link? --his descendents include both OOT Link and ALttP Link? )

(300 years later ) The Hylian Civil War

10 years later first part of OOT

Child Timeline

After MM happens, Several years (6) later Ganondorf is banished to the Twilight Realm

100 years later Ganon Escapes and Twilight Princess happens

(100 years later) a new Ganondorf was born, grew to adulthood and sought out the forbidden trident. A few years after 4 Swords Adventures happens where both Vaati and Ganon are defeated and Ganon is sealed in the 4 Sword

Adult Timeline (starts 10 years after OOT part 1)

After 100 years Ganon escapes the Spirit Realm (Same time give or take as TP/ALTTP in other timeline) and Hyrule is flooded by the Gods (Zelda in portrait is same as TP her hair just hasn't darkened yet)

100 years after that WW takes place and Ganon is killed(Same time as ALBW and 4SA (Ganon turned to stone with Master Sword in him, sinks to bottom of sea)

1 year later PH/New Hyrule is founded

100 years after that SP takes place

Fallen Hero Timeline

Link is defeated in the 7 year future. Ganon rules for a while but 4 years later is finally sealed away with the Triforce in the corrupted Sacred Realm, now the Dark World

After 15 years the Dark World begins to leak out. People search for the Triforce and are turned into monsters

This resulted in the catastrophic Imprisoning War

85 years later Ganondorf escapes disguised as Agahnim. (Same time as TP) After 3 years he managed to rule almost all the land, and Princess Zelda called out to Link, last descendents of the knights of Hyrule to save her (ALttP)

1 year later LA happens

3 years later OOA/OOS--Ganon is almost revived but it fails. And he is revealed within the Dark World with the Triforce of Power, leaving the Triforce split

100 years later --ALBW happens, Yuga Ganon is defeated and Lorule (and unsaved Termina) is restored (Same time more or less as 4 Swords Adventures) TriForce is Recovered

Golden Age Begins

200 years of peace

Decline--Wizard (possibly aspect of Ganon) appears, corrupts Prince, Princess Zelda cursed into sleep. Triforce of Courage is lost

100 years later Ganon Returns and LOZ happens

6 years later AOL happens and Sleeping Zelda is Awoken

(Ganon is ashes but could be revived with the blood of the hero--100 years later FOE/WOG. or ZA)

Hyrule Warrios happens at its own point and smooshes all the timelines together, eventually resulting in:

Hero 10,000 years ago

Age of Calamity

100 years later BOTW

Character Headcanons

Hylia's Chosen Hero

Firstborn child given at birth to the knightly priesthood to specifically serve the Goddess Hylia, doesn't know who parents are (likely has some siblings through whom SS Link is descended). Imprisoned for treason by Lord Daiginas for "preaching blasphemy" after he foresaw the rise of the Demon King. Orville was his squire/charge before he was imprisoned

Skyward Sword

Both Link and Zelda are only children. Zelda's mother Mia died in childbirth, Link's parents Sibyelle and Selik died of a sickness that passed through when he was a boy. Almost killed him too but Zelda pulled him through, first unrealized incident of Goddess power

Hero of Men

King Gustaf was the father of the HOM Zelda, both he and her mother Lea are still alive

This Link is a gardener who works at the palace, whose parents died as a child in a house fire, and doesn't remember their names. Friends with Zelda but doesn't end up with her

Minish Cap

This Link lost his parents as a child, doesn't know who father was and mother died in childbirth. Taken in by his grandfather, the grandson of the previous Link, and trained as a Blacksmith.

Zelda is daughter of King Daltus and Queen Zelda, who also died in childbirth, have been best friends since they were children as Smith and Daltus are friends. Don't end up together though, and Link later travels to find out who his father was and if he's still alive.

4 Sword

This Link is the great grandson of Minish Cap Link, and has been training as a priest with Zelda. His parents are both still alive, Father also named Link though didn't have a grand adventure, and his mother is named Ethlinn

Zelda has been training as a priestess though her parents King Daltus III and Queen Seline would prefer her to focus on her queenly duties and not old legends.

Ocarina of Time

Link's Parents were Banzetta and Loretta, both killed in the Hyrulean Civil War

Zelda's mother Etain died during the Civil War as well, her father is King Cereus

Malink kids--Pola and Meino, daughter and son, TP Link is great grandson of Pola.

Twilight Princess

Zelda's father is King Daphnes Nohansen, but due to timeline changes he passed on peacefully a few years ago. She is an only child and her mother Zelda died when she was a young girl in a riding accident.

Link's parents Panna and Teofil passed away due to an illness that came through when he was 14, and has been taken care of by the townsfolk since then. He ends up with Ilia and they have 3 daughters, Ninian, Ilta and Ria

4 Sword Adventures

This Zelda is the young Queen of Hyrule. Her parents, Zelda and Pyrus, died in a shipwreck a few years ago. Link is already known to be the Chosen Hero but is untested. His father Stefan was a knight and was killed by one of the monsters of Hyrule, his mother Agata is still alive and works as Baker in the palace.

A Link to the Past

Link's father was Rune, a knight at the palace, and Queen Zelda. Zelda is his younger half sister. Queen dies giving birth, Rune dies fighting one of Ganon's Demons. Sigil, Rune's brother, also a knight of Hyrule raises him

He and Zelda have an unfortunate Luke and Leia situation at first (nothing happens beyond that cheek kiss) but they get it sorted out eventually

A Link Between Worlds

Link parents are Arn and Medilia, apprenticed him to a Blacksmith, still alive, has one younger brother Bram, still alive

Zelda's parents, Zelda and Kai also still alive, has younger siblings, 2 younger brothers Abbe and Aldo

Legend of Zelda

Sleeping Zelda's brother named Gustaf, and is the great grandfather of LOZ Zelda, who is recently orphan by time of game, only child of King Harkinian

Link is an orphan. Has been on his own since 7 years old, wandering the land. Ends up with Sleeping Zelda who decides to travel with him. First Zelda continues to rule and they come and visit her.

Wind Waker

Link is 2 years older than Aryll, their parents Ari and Liann ship went down in a storm when Aryll was 3. Grandmother is maternal. He and Tetra date for a bit as teenagers but then just end as friends

Tetra is a descendant of alternate TP Zelda, her hair will darken as she gets older like her mother. Her mother was Tercia and her father is unknown. Tetra is great granddaughter of antediluvian/tp Zelda

Spirit Tracks

Zelda is the granddaughter of Tetra and Link is the great grandson of Link. Zelda is an only child but Link has several siblings at home, an older sister Liane and 2 younger brothers Loren and Levin. Zelink does actually end up together.

Hyrule Warriors

Ganon's soul being split in four happened due to the 4 Sword in 4SA, that Link is the great grandson of 4SA Link who became a Knight of Hyrule. His twin sister Linkle was separated from him when their parents Tymon and Camma (both Knights) disappeared (sucked into the Twilight Realm) and their memories messed up a bit due to Cia's time manipulation but they'll find eachother again. He's just friends with his Zelda. He and Linkle eventually go on a journey to find their parents in the Twilight Realm)

Zelda is Queen, her father Daltus having died during a battle as a child, her mother Cairn was Queen regent for a while

BotW

Link's father is named Bayern, Knight of Hyrule, younger sister Farrah (12) Mother Ola died in childbirth with Farrah. Both father and sister die in Calamity release.

45 notes · View notes

kintatsujo · 3 years

Text

LoZ AU- The Courage of Running Away Part TWENTY-SEVEN

Here’s the previous post, sorry this one took a couple days ^^; I keep overextending because I’m as excited to get to the denouement as I am to be writing the boss fight. (The denouement has some fun character moments)

These next couple posts are mostly more like prose with illustrations.

#AU August

#LoZ AU: The Courage of Running Away

Astramorus manages to get back to the altar and the stone beds the girls have been laid out on; despite having had to dodge whipping tentacles a number of times the God's Nightmare in the middle of the room seems a little more concerned with its Manifestations and the Triforce bearers.

Serenumbra is nowhere to be seen, but there's a door ajar to the side, leading to the Sanctuary sacristy (a sacristy is a little room off the side of a church sanctuary that is basically a combination storage room and prep room.)

Astramorus has to get these Princesses out of the way of these tentacles anyway, so he gets Hilda into a fireman's carry and tucks Zelda under his arm and drags them both over through the door, making note that there's another door in the back of the sacristy leading somewhere dark.

[Image Description: Astramorus has Hilda along his back and Zelda tucked under his arm and is attempting to walk fast while dragging them; it’s awkward because while Princess Zelda is fairly little for fourteen, Princess Hilda is taller than he is and her feet are dragging behind while her head droops over his shoulder. They are also both completely dead weight. End ID.]

(The girls have been spelled asleep; they’ll be fine eventually.)

After that he goes back to the altar and grabs the heavy book of magic at the book stand, because Serenumbra left that behind as well.

He makes sure neither Hilda or Zelda are too uncomfortable, then he heads down the dark tunnel after Serenumbra, book in hand.

It's certainly dark enough to give a man pause, no evidence of light any further down the corridor. Astramorus knows this probably leads to the castle throne room, eventually, but who knows how many other tunnels and caves may also be connected.

But Astramorus is a priest, and Link shoved a few fairies on him before they came here, and he knows a few things about fairies most people don't.

He pulls one of his little fairy jars and a silver rupee from his pocket, and he hums a little prayer as he unstoppers the jar and drops the expensive little gem inside.

"Please, little one," he says to the fairy. "Guide me through the dark and help me find the one I seek."

The fairy puts her hands on the silver rupee in acceptance of the offering, absorbing its magic into herself and spiraling up out of the jar.

"Let's go!" she says, zipping ahead, and Astramorus smiles and follows her.

[Image Description: Astramorus holds his hand under a brightly glowing fairy, a faint smile on his face. She’s mostly obscured by her own light but appears to be a tiny woman with antennae, and she’s saluting him cheekily. End ID.]

If you’re not familiar with Legend of Zelda, this is not a mechanic in any game, but it should be.

"You're awfully confident for a shadow from a bad dream," Dinravi says to Nightmare Demise, shaking out his hand from the punch and drawing his sword. "Mama, please check on Ghirahim, I'll call for you if I need help."

Nightmare Demise snarls, pulling a sword from shadow that only barely resembles the form Ghirahim himself once took. Eltani nods at her son and goes to Ghirahim still on the floor, using her sword to bat a tentacle away from him as she arrives at his side.

"You know that's NOT your old master, demon," she says, shaking his shoulder as if to rouse him.

Ghirahim closes his eyes, still shaking. "It's not- It's not that simple," he whispers. "I... I can't."

[Image Description: Eltani is staring at Ghirahim in some shock and concern. He’s gone flushed, and he’s shaking, staring at the floor, his mouth tense. End ID.]

Queen Zelda's Nightmare warps from OOT Zelda to a dragon, and Zelda takes it out with a blast of light in the mouth. It shifts from the dragon to a massive Moldorm and she casually strikes its tail with a hand. "I can do this as long as I have to," she tells the writhing shape. It becomes a man with a boar's head and she wrinkles her nose, grabbing the spear it strikes at her with. "Stop that," she says, and now she goes ahead and burns her magic reserves for one massive blast, burning her Nightmare completely away. She looks up to see that Astramorus is dragging the princesses into the safety of the sacristy and nods grimly at him, then turns to the nearest other fight in the room, which is Dinravi against Nightmare Demise.

Queen Zelda fishes a magic replenishing potion from the pocket of her skirt and then joins Eltani next to Ghirahim as she drinks it. Eltani gives her a helpless expression as she kneels beside them and puts a hand on Ghirahim's shoulder.

[Image Description: Queen Zelda drinking from a blue bottle as she walks. A legend reads: “Magic Replenishing Potion: It’s the Blue One!” End ID.]

"You cannot face the shade of your first master?" Zelda asks Ghirahim.

Ghirahim looks down and shakes his head. "I know it's not him, I know it's not him," he whispers harshly, and then repeats: "It's not that simple."

"It's fear," Zelda concludes, and he inhales sharply, shakily. "Lord Ghirahim, listen to me. If you cannot face him, look instead at the man you would call master now."

Dinravi is a flashy sort of fighter but this isn't some graceful sword duel; it's a brawl and a bullfight wrapped in one. Nightmare Demise and Dinravi are taunting one another in turn, but Demise is focusing on Dinravi's youth while Dinravi's jibes are laser focused on how fucked up it is that Ghirahim, Demise's most loyal lieutenant, is so afraid of him, what that says about Demise and how this thing isn't even the real Demise, just a ranting shadow.

It's when Ghirahim really looks up and is seeing this, though, that Nightmare Demise mimics something he recognizes, and calls down lightning to throw at Dinravi's face. He panics, calling out Dinravi's name.

[Image Description: Dinravi catches the lightning in one hand with a “CRACK,” the lightning overflowing around him. "One of my ancestors was the Lady Urbosa," he says, his hand sparking. Sparks overflow from his eyes like tears, but he’s smiling. "You think I've never fought with lightning?" Cut to Ghirahim, who’s blushing so hard the tips of his ears have gone red, the sparks reflected in his wide eyes. A legend informs: “Ghirahim is REALLY doomed.” End ID.]

(For the record getting to namedrop Urbosa as one of Dinravi’s ancestors is the major reason CoRA is post-AoC timeline. We have stepped into rule of cool territory but it’s the climactic boss fight, it’s allowed.)

Queen Zelda smiles in Dinravi's direction fondly, then says, "Lord Ghirahim, I understand if you aren't ready to face a shadow of your past. But perhaps you can help me with the main Nightmare and we'll see if that helps Prince Dinravi in turn, yes?"

Ghirahim looks at her, and then he stands.

Link, meanwhile, is sharing no taunts with the Nightmare of the Fierce Deity, though the Fierce Deity is certainly continuing to offer unnervingly calm and gentle commentary, on his form, his fears, his accomplishments.

Link is doing his damndest not to actually listen.

(and this post is long enough so we’re getting into THAT in the next post, which is already mostly written)

#my art #loz #loz au #loz au: the courage of running away #au august

17 notes · View notes

mrneighbourlove · 5 years

Text

The Mask over the Man. The Demon over the Beast. Majora over Ganon.

I love both these villains. The N64 was my first console I delved deep into, and Ocarina of Time and Majora’s Mask introduced me to two of my favourite villains in gaming. Today though, I want to delve into why I see one of these characters as the superior ‘villain’. Just my opinion, but I hope to share my case strongly and passionately. I’ll go over each character, than why I believe that one reigns over the other, even if ever so slightly.

Ganon

The King of Evil. The King of Darkness. And the Great Calamity of Hyrule. I love the pig demon. His constant presence in the Legend of Zelda series cannot be ignored. Gameplay wise, he can be so much fun to fight against in the final battle for the sake of the world. Doesn’t matter if you fight him as a wolf, if he’s a wizard, or just a mighty beast. Story wise is where a have a slip with him. Ganon set the standard for me in the ‘Dark Lord’ archetype, however, he can sometimes feel simplistic in that regard, simply wishing to conquer the world. And as the beast, barring perhaps Link to the Past, he lacks any real character. It’s also unfortunate that most of the time you meet him, you defeat him immediately afterwards. The best he’s ever been as a threat to me, was in Breath of the Wild.

Calamity Ganon

This is Ganon as almost a force of nature. No real conscious we can see, having thrown away any shell of a man for hatred and malice. What really makes this Ganon work, is the relationship you *rediscover* with the old champions, and feeling the heartache at knowing they’re dead. The fact that it festered in Hyrule for over a century, is highly impressive. But the biggest complaint people had (and why everyone is going crazy over the mummified corpse of MummyDorf) is that because Calamity Ganon was just pure hatred, we lacked the relationship of the three Triforce users seen in past games. Which leads me talking about the man, the legend, the best part of Ganon.

Ganondorf

Making Ganon into Ganondorf did wonders for the character. His goals became more relatable, because we as humans can relate with another human being, or at the very least, understand the goal. Hailing from the Gerudo desert, there are two Ganondorf’s that I want to pick out. The Wind Waker split, and the Twilight Princess split. In Ocarina of Time, Ganondorf is the best evil conquer he’s ever been, even without the long locks of Hyrule Warriors. He set out with a long purpose goal to take the Triforce and conquer the world. And he was the main focus as a villain. Ganondorf was also young, and brash. He had a flair, which made him a fantastic villain. He truly appeared to be the King of Evil. Upon his defeat, he gave a loud speech of getting revenge, very classic villain monologue. The next game we saw him was Wind Waker. I feel confident in saying that despite not seeing too much of him, this is the best Ganondorf becomes as a character. He’s far more relaxed in his evil plot. The man goes out of his way to make sure his kidnaped girls aren’t hurt, and when dealing with both Link and Zelda, he gets straight to the point with them, yet, he doesn’t kill them. And up until the end, he still has an air of menace when he wishes to be theatric, despite having more experience and wisdom. After the frightful Puppet Ganon fight, you learn why Ganondorf set out for power in the first place. His people suffered under the desert heat of day, and the icy cold nights. In his own words, the winds carried death. His desire for the Triforce was to bring back the old land of Hyrule. Despite what might have happened after he brought back the land, Ganondorf wanted to *restore* the old land of Hyrule from under the sea. That’s almost heroic. You emphasize with him. Which I argue diminished his villainous qualities in exchange for a more flushed out character. He only tries to kill Link and Zelda after his wish is denied and he snaps into insanity.

Then there’s Twilight Princess Ganondorf. A really cool Ganondorf. His design is awesome, I love his boss fights gameplay wise and musically, but this is one of the Ganon’s I’d place into the ‘cockblock’ section of Ganons. Real talk, I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned this, but I really like Zant as a villain. He was incredibly intimidating until you face him in the realm of Twilight. His relationship with Midna was interesting, and he carried a cool air not seen before. He was chill... until the very end into his sudden crazy decent. I feel that both Ganondorf and Zant suffer because of the formers sudden conclusion. Each character lost time in the game that could have been used to develop them more. Zant could have had more time to develop into madness as the final boss, or Ganondorf could have been established from the beginning, instead of being diet OOT Ganondorf. His evil goal of placing the world into Twilight didn’t have any drastic changes to the world either. Civilians didn’t even notice the danger they were in. At least OOT Ganon ruled Hyrule for 7 years, and Calamity Ganon was around for 100 years. When Ganondorf takes away time from other villains, it makes him a weaker villain as well. Which is why the Mask stood tall in such a unique story.

Majora

The entity of Majora’s Mask stands out to me as something insidious and inhuman. Unlike Ganondorf, you can’t identify with an unblinking Mask like you can a human being. It stands out as a villain that doesn’t need Ganon in its story or to take his form. The duel relationship with Skull Kid is interesting, as Skull Kid isn’t entirely innocent in his actions, but the transition Majora takes over Skull Kid makes you wonder who’s control until the very end. In my recent play through, I just discovered this, but in Day 1 or 2, the Skull Kid will do a little dance when you spot him in the telescope, and once you look back, he spanks his ass at you and jumps away. However, at Day 3, his head is sideways, looking at you, and constantly twitching, rooted to his spot. It’s like Majora is a drug to Skull Kid that has finally caught up. And that’s a terrible fate to think about.

What stands out to me the most about Majora over Ganon, is the stakes as a hero. First, looking at the world. Ganondorf ruled Hyrule for 7 years, yet villages like Kakariko are still around. The world hasn’t been ruined. Even with Calamity Ganon having been around for 100 years, he’s in a prison with Zelda, and civilization keeps ticking by. The moment you enter the world of Termina and you look to the sky, you can see Majora’s immediate tool of armageddon.

The Moon

This rock in the sky slowly falls to the Earth over a period of three days. The stakes are felt immediately. You either stop Majora from crashing the moon into Termina, or you burn with the rest of the world. Swept away by a wall of fire compered to an atomic bomb. If the ticking timer doesn’t remind you of your duty, the earthquakes on the third day, then looking to the sky will. Another peek of interest for me in the camp of villainy, is the people you meet along the way. The world of Termina is full of colourful characters that Link meets throughout his adventure. From Tatl to Pamela and her Father, you get heavily invested with them. And they all are aware of the danger of the moon. Almost all are directly or indirectly affected by the Skull Kid and the power of Majora that he immaturely wields. Mikau is killed by Gerudo pirates because they were influenced by Skull Kid to steal the Zora eggs. Areas such as the Woodfall Swamp, Snowhead mountains and Ikana Valley are cursed due to the Monsters Majora unleashes after sealing the giants away. Kafei is cursed into a child directly by Skull Kid and has his wedding mask stolen by a thief as a result. Cremina, god willing that you save her sister Romani from the “Ghosts”, drugs her sister with alcoholic milk so she sleeps through the destruction of the world. The acts of villainy Majora does ripple big and small. With Ganondorf and Ganon, you are given free room to take your time, you lose very little allies, and you have Zelda backing you up most of the time in a battle of destiny. With Majora, however, Zelda is no way involved, many people you meet die and suffer, some you can’t save even with rewinding time, and if you don’t stop the villain, he isn’t going to reshape the world, or control it in his own image, it’s going to destroy it. That is terrifying. Ganon has never truly terrified me. He’s just too human enough, and his villainous acts have never put me on edge. Unlike the champions of Breath of the Wild who you are avenging, the people of Termina are here and now, and that puts so much more tension on me.

Ganondorf is a great villain, but the inhuman characteristics of an entity that wanted to destroy all left a bigger impression on me. When you finally defeat Majora and save everyone you can correctly and within the time you’re given, including Skull Kid I might add, the credits feel so amazing because you truly saved the world, but more importantly, you saved the people that inhabit it. Defeating Ganon as a villain is a battle of destiny. Defeating Majora is a battle for everyone’s tomorrow.

542 notes · View notes

oolathurman · 6 years

Text

so @tracinyad tagged me for fucking ever ago and holy shit ty for being patient cuz i have NOT been around lately omg

#long post because LORD do i know how to rant and rave for way too long :’D

1. Favorite game from the last 5 years? Probably Breath of the Wild! Though it’s my sibling who owns the switch so I can’t play it all the time... ;-; but honestly, like... the zelda series is what really got me into video games in the first place. before, like sure, i’d play pokemon and mario on my gameboy, but i don’t think i would have really classified it as a hobby (vs casual pastime) until i booted up our old n64 and played through ocarina of time in high school.

so getting to play breath of the wild, it reminded me of what it felt like to actually play through Ocarina of Time. This wonder and curiosity, this wide eyed excitement. Breath of the Wild is definitely a huge leap from oot, but playing it and exploring felt like what oot gave me.

2. Most nostalgic game? Y’know, considering how much I just went on about ocarina of time, probably that. :’D Like I’ve said, it’s what got me into video games. I doubt I would have gotten to this point in my life if it weren’t for OOT. I’d be elsewhere, and definitely not playing swtor, I’ll give you that much.

oot, it was just... so much fun. And sure, looking at the n64 graphics now is a fucking trip, but it was just so exciting to go through hyrule field and gerudo valley and kakariko and learn about the gerudo and the sheikah and the hylians and seeing all of it was just.

i mentioned already that i had played pokemon games before, but something about oot felt more in depth to me. and now, now that i can play this once-console game on a handheld? it’s amazing to see how far we progress in just a handful of years. it’s amazing how we can excel as humans, as people. I can relive that wonder from oot anywhere now, since I can bring it on my 2ds. and i love it.

3. Game that deserves a sequel? god, a few years ago, i would’ve said mirror’s edge. but it got its sequel! and i’m so proud! when i had first seen mirror’s edge, i was jittery with excitement, to see a video game where there’s a person who looks like me, an asian! that’s the main character!

now though? i admit, i’m not sure. as much as i love video games, i don’t play a wide variety, mostly because of budget restraints. i have yet to play through prey, i definitely want to, but i’d love to see more games in general that feature asian protagonists. hell, i’d love to see more games that feature protagonists of color, and the ‘build-your-own-protagonist’ games don’t count.

4. Game that deserves a remaster? WELL I WOULD’VE SAID OCARINA OF TIME BUT YEAH, I ALREADY WENT OVER HOW IT’S ON A 2DS NOW. though i think it’d be cute to see an updated version of the zelda handhelds, like minish cap. i do like the gba graphic, the pixel art style, but i wanna be able to move in 3D instead of up/down/left/right.

5. Favorite game series? Z E L D A

6. Favorite genre? rpg and puzzle! simulation ones are fun too :D

7. Least favorite genre? i’m not even gonna bother touching horror games lol. if there were some completely jumpscare free ones, maybe, but i’m not here for slasher horror games with jumpscares. :P

8. Favorite song from a game? i will never get over the opening song to ocarina of time. it always gives me chills and it’s like, instantly calming.

9. Favorite character from a game? one singular character? that’s a hard choice. the thing about say, link from the zelda series, is that he’s always sorta a blank-ish slate. the point of him being named link was so that he would be the link from player to game (i read that off an interview a LONGGG time ago lol). though in botw, he does have more personality than the previous games... and besides, he looks super fucking cool ALWAYS.

other than a character from a zelda game, i might have to go with someone like Vette from swtor. She’s gone through hell and back, she’s been a slave practically all her life (and she very well may be, if a player decides to play the dark side route for their SW), and she still has this energy that’s never ending and it’s amazing. she has a love for who she is as a person, as a twi’lek, and she takes so much pride in her identity and she always gets back to her feet and i love her for that.

10. Favorite ship from a game? Link x Zelda. Listen, if in every game, I (as link, i guess????) fawn over the princess, want to protect her and make her happy, i’m gonna have to go with a ship that just? makes sense to me. i’m not even thinking about any romantic relationship, i just... love them. depending on the game, link either starts out with nothing or leaves everything behind, to protect her and hyrule. sometimes, he doesn’t even know what he’s protecting, or how much it’s all worth. botw, link goes out to save hyrule without knowing anything of his past. he rediscovers it along the way, and in all those cutscenes, link is by her side, ready to do whatever it takes to protect her. is it his duty? sure. but he takes it seriously.

11. Favorite voice actor from a game? ... tbh, I don’t really... know voice actors by name???? especially game ones. outside of swtor, i can’t even remember the last full game i played that had voice acting.

from swtor, i really do like the smugglers’ VAs, as well as the SWs’ and the M!IA. felix’s voice actor also made me really love him so he counts too ;u;

12. Favorite cutscene? i’m not gonna lie, i’m horrid at remembering cutscenes. like, i will remember the emotional impact but i can’t remember jack shit rn.

though the final scene in oot, after ganondorf is sealed, when zelda speaks to link in the clouds, that was pretty emotional. and how link came back to hyrule castle afterwards. ;-;

other than that, i’d prolly say all the memories from botw together. the one that you get when you first pull out the master sword again, that made me tear up the first time around. ;-;

13. Favorite boss? ok this might sound strange, but it might be bongo bongo from ocarina of time. not necessarily for the mechanics, but more for the personal headcanon i’ve built around the OOT sheikah and who bongo bongo might have been.

the sheikah temple, we see that it’s filled with things like torture devices and shit and the undead enemies, etc. all the enemies in that temple? the dead, or parts of them. and yet it’s referred to as a temple. obviously, ganondorf had something to do with the corruption of the temples in hyrule, but my headcanon is that the sheikah temple was a battleground for a... sorta like a sheikah civil war. the hyrulean civil war is something mentioned throughout multiple games, so my theory was that the sheikah were at odds with each other too. some wanted to stay loyal to the royal family, others didn’t. bongo bongo was one of the latter ones.

my theory is that the dead of the sheikah, especially the ones who were disloyal to the crown, were cursed to protect sheikah land forever. bongo bongo, one of the disloyal ones, had his hands cut off and was decapitated before being bound to the well. (hands cut off bc he played rhythms on his drum to relay messages to other disloyal sheikah.)

... anyways, i love the sheikah, they were creepy af in oot, and honestly my love for the bongo bongo boss is mostly because of the story i built up around OOT.

14. First console? it’d be the n64, handed down from my older cousins. they had also sent majora’s mask, donky kong 64, 007, some racing game i think??? and that was it. i never actually finished playing majora’s mask either bc timed shit stresses me out lol. but my first console was handed down to me.

15. Current console or consoles? uhhh, I still have the N64, and a hand me down xbox 360. i also have my desktop! i suppose handheld consoles count too, so my 2ds, my phone, i still have my gameboy SP and my sibling’s gameboy color lying around somewhere lol.

16. Console you want? i want my own goddamn switch dammit!!! let me play botw!!!! let me play mario games!!!!

17. Place from a game that you’d like to visit? Hyrule. Undoubtedly. Plus, the universe of star wars, of course! i wanna see how much of a greasy smelly mess Nar Shaddaa is :’D

18. Place from a game that you’d like to live in? y’know, as much as i joke about wanting to live on nar shaddaa, that place is a goddamn mess. it’s more space vegas than space hong kong, so i’d rather live in space hong kong - wherever that may be.

though rishi WAS a beautiful planet. looked pretty humid though ngl. maybe rakata prime? the beaches there were so pretty omg ;-;

19. Ridiculous crossover that would never happen but would be super fun? i would fucking love to see link beat the living shit out of ganon with a lightsaber lol. and honestly, the master sword has the same amount of emotional weight that luke’s first lightsaber did when he held it for the fist time.

20. Book that would make a good game? my friend, i have lost most ability to actually read a novel lol. curse adhd. though, the circle of magic series, that was a really fun series. i’d like to see it turned into some sort of visual medium!

21. Show/Movie that would make a good game? star wars. :P no uhhhh lemme think. i feel like gravity falls would be great for it, mostly cuz of all the hints and clues the creators left for fans.

22. Games you want to play? PREY.

23. Have you gotten 100% completion in a game? i think i technically might have done so in the n64 version of oot? but they didn’t really have achievement trackers on that one so idk :P i’m not much of a completionist tbh

24. Have you cried over a game? oh, yeah. zelda series makes me cry a lot ngl.

25. What power-up or ability would you want IRL? I’d say force powers, because let’s be real now, who doesn’t still try to use the force to pick up things out of arms reach?

#long post #alex gets personal #a real live alex

1 note · View note

scotianostra · 4 years

Photo

On August 25th 1776 the Philosopher David Hume died.

His scepticism went as far as religion, when it was dangerous to question the existence of god and the vast majority of people were believers.

There's a wee story Hume himself used to recount that on his way back to the Old Town after visiting his New Town house, while it was still being built, he lost his footing he fell knee-deep into mud at the Nor' Loch, it was being drained at the time and was more a Nor' Bog than Loch, (it is now Princes Street Gardens) he was so stuck he could not get out on his own and finally gave a cry for help. An old fishwife is said to have went to his aid but on recognising him as "Hume the Atheist" refused to help, Hume implored,

"But my good woman, does not your religion as a Christian teach you to do good, even to your enemies?"

"That may well be," she replied. "But ye shallnae get oot o' that, till ye become a Christian yersell, and repeat the Lord's Prayer and the Belief!"

Did he stand his ground and ridicule the superstitious beliefs of this woman? Of course not. To the surprise of the fishwife, he readily complied, and true to her word she helped him out of the bog.

Pica are, his portrait by Allan Ramsay, a statue by Alexander Stoddart on the Royal Mile in Edinburgh and Hume's mausoleum by Robert Adam in the Old Calton Burial Ground on Waterloo Place.

#Scotland #scottish #Scottish Enlightenment #philosopher #historian #History #Edinburgh

13 notes · View notes

reekierevelator · 4 years

Text

Beyond Burns

a short story

I was getting set up to record my latest spacecast on holiday trips to Mars, - Spacex starships were offering a special deal, - when in barges the director, slamming the door behind her.

‘What does the big data analysis tell you to spout on about this time?’ spluttered the red-faced human, in her usual sensitive way.

‘Summer holidays – trips to Mars.’

‘Oh, not that old shite again. Same every year. Hell’s teeth, we don’t employ robot vidcasters just to end up doing what everyone else does. Post-festive season it’s all diets and holidays, same old same old. Now listen to me Chuck, I’m after the interplanetary broadcaster medal and the other stations are already all over the new technology. We have to do better than RADG, who got that whizz-kid to do an interview with James Watt.’

‘Who?’

‘Who knows, an engineer or something, hundreds of years ago, the point is Chuck that if they can do it so can we. We need to get our act together, get on this bandwagon quick, or else we pack our bags and get out. It’s a cutthroat business – well, not for you obviously, maybe cut your cables and sell you for scrap if no-one else wants you, but at least you don’t have any bags to pack. Listen hard Chuck, we’re up against it, so do it now while it’s still just this sound across time tech stuff; get in right away before upgrades escalate it to visuals and prices follow suit.’

‘But all my algorithms are geared to entertainment, holidays and so on – what do I know about history, engineers?’

‘It doesn’t have to be James Watt, numpty. We can set up the new tech to beam in on anyone selected. Even this sound-only stuff is expensive though, so we need a well-known name. It’s January, you know that red red rose song? I’ve always had a hankering to know more about that bad boy.’

‘Who?’

‘Name of Robert Burns, numpty. I can’t be the only one still knows the name, even if it’s hundreds of years since he was around.’

‘Where do I find him?’

‘For God’s sake Chuck, it’s over a year since you were working out of Moon West. You need to be all about Earth people now. He was an Earthling. Ok, I know this is tricky for robots but you’ve got to remember Earth people can be as interested in their ancient predecessors as in red planet holidays.’

‘You do know they’ve worked out that water problem on Mars now.’

‘Will you forget Mars Chuck. Just do as I ask, ok? Bobby Burns. Get on to him. Record him. Get him on the WSKY worldcast.’ The director flung her head back, turned on her high heels, flecks of saliva spraying from her mouth, and slammed the door on her way out. All work and no love life, that woman’s heading for a heart attack. I suppose I might be too if I had one.

I searched my Universal Knowledge databanks and checked out this Burns guy. Apparently an Earth human born 1759, died 1796. An entertainer. Wrote some songs and poems. That must have been what passed for entertainment in those days. And I thought, that’s only thirty-seven years, hardly enough time for a simple human to have done very much.

I switched on my motor control and rolled off to see the engineers. This new-fangled technology annoyed me intensely. I mean I was only built five years ago and already my memory capacity can’t keep up with all the new software updates. It’s the middle of the twenty-first century, the Earth’s dying on its feet, anyone human who can afford to is escaping, moving to the Moon, or buying a holiday home on Mars or Venus - some even taking a punt on Mercury - and so my mad boss lumbers me with this nonsense about new tech and tells me to talk to an ancient geezer from centuries ago. I mean, jeez-o.

The engineer android showed me the kit and explained how to set date and time and to use GPRS Historical Module to pinpoint the human I wanted to talk to, and some kind of one-way microscope to get a visual fix. Then there was this contraption to shout though so that your voice somehow carried back through time. The engineer said it would probably sound a bit tinny to the recipient, especially given my five year old voice activation system. He warned me the humans were all ensnared by religious controllers back then and it might sound like some ethereal voice of God to him when he heard it. But then he smiled that ingratiatingly metallic smile of his and added that he knew any good media jock – such as myself – would be well-used to talking to total randoms at any distance and putting them at ease.

Since this guy Burns hadn’t lived that long, for a human anyway, I decided that to get anything at all interesting out of him I’d better set the time module for his last couple of years. He’d at least have had time to do something. I fixed the controls for 1795 and told the engineer to locate Robert Burns and tie me on to him. My databanks said he ended up someplace called Dumfries in a bit of the Earth called Scotland.

The engineer locked on to a scruffy looking human, half-dressed in breeches and black waistcoat, living in some dingy accommodation in a squalid street called the Mill Vennel. Then he turned to me and clicked his metal joints into the thumbs up sign.

Surprised, I pressed my voice activation speaker close to the horn and shouted ‘Hey there, Bobby, this is Chuck, coming straight at you from WSKY Earthwide, - and, oh yeah, I’m about two hundred years away.’

There was a slight time delay before I heard: ‘Whit the Deil!!’ Whit’s that rammy in ma lug?’

‘Hey, like I said Bobby, it’s me, Chuck. You won’t be able to see me…’

‘Whit, are ye hidin lik some kin o wee sleekit cowrin tim’rous beastie?’

‘No it’s this new tech Bobby, no visuals yet, maybe in a few years - once the android geeks have worked on it…’

‘Is this God speirin? I canna unnerstaun. Whit d’ye want o me? An can ye stop ca’in me Bobby?’

‘Ok what name do you prefer? My databanks are throwing up options – there’s Bobby, Bob, Bert, Bertie, Rob?’

‘Rob? Aye weel Rab, Rabbie then.’

‘All good, - Rab it is, and what I want here is just for you and me to have a chat Rab – maybe I‘ll ask a couple of questions – you ok with that Rab?

‘You’ve a gey peculiar voice God.’

‘Like I said Rab, I’m Chuck, can’t really claim to be a deity as such. Call me inhuman if you want. I don’t mind. I can’t take offence. You can say what you like to me.’

‘I canna unnerstaun ye. But syne yer no God, that’s something forbye. I canna deny I’ve had mair than a few run-ins wi the Kirk in ma time. Yet, I’m aywes interestit tae hae a blether wi ither chiels an hear their stories.’

‘You’ll need to speak up Rab, the sound’s having to travel quite a long way. Can you just behave like a typical human who walks along entirely by himself and bellows into some mini-microphone that’s radio-linked to the communicator in his pocket.’

‘Whit? Oh I can bellow alright. Gin ye ever heard me recitin ma verses at the Tarbolton Bachelors Club, the Crochallan Fencibles, or even in The Globe ye widna doot it.’

‘Well, that’s good to know Rab. But I see all those get-togethers involved drinking alcohol.’

‘Aye, an whitfor no? When chapman billies leave the street, an drouthy neebors neebors meet. There’s naethin wrang wi the nappy. Wi tippeny we fear nae evil; wi usquabae we’ll face the devil.’

‘You could be right Rab. Not something I can comment on. For me, it’s just another way to rust the bodywork. So can we do the usual stuff? Check through the data - What you do, where you came from, how you got into the business, famous friend anecdotes, women you’ve known – you know, the usual stuff. When we’re done my monomaniacal medal-seeking big boss director will bung you some compensation for your time.’

‘A ken the big boss type. Ye shouldna worry aboot yon high heid yins that think ower much o theirsels Chuck. Ye see yon birkie ca’d a lord wha struts an stares an a that? Though hundreds worship at his word he’s but a coof for a that. For a that an a that, his ribband, star, an a that, the man o independent mind, he looks an laughs at a that.’

‘Well Rab, that’s certainly something I’ll add to my memory bank, but robot unemployment is on the up these days and the second-hand market is down. It’s the metal scrapheap that beckons if my boss gets vindictive.’

‘Ach, dinna be feart man. Did I heard you say ‘compensation’? Does that mean money?’

‘Sure, cash, spondulicks, filthy lucre.’

‘I’ve aywes suffered wi bein awfy short o the siller.’

‘Glad to be able to help out Rab. So let’s get started – early life?

‘Aye weel, let’s see, ma faither, a gairdner, tenant farmer, wis pit aff a fairm in Kincardine, near Stonehaven. Cam tae Ayrshire an met ma mither. Build his ain but’n’ben at Alloway for a vegetable gairden. The faimly grew so he needed mair room. He took oot a loan for a tenancy at Mount Oliphant. Found it wis gae stony grund. The loan wis lik a millstone. Seiven bairns an me the auldest. We a had tae chip in wi the fairmwork soon as we were able. An later we flitted tae a fairm at Lochlea but naethin much changed. Ma faither wisna weel then an I wis the man o the fairm at fifteen. Hard, hard life. Aywes freezin or mingin, or baith; workin masel tae death.’

‘But what about college Rab?’

‘College? I went tae schuil at Kirkosward for a few year, stertit when I turned six. Ma faither wis mad keen on the learnin but. Scrimped an saved. Got me a tutor for two year, learning French, studying English. An efter that faither taught me hissel – geography an sic lik. An then a year o the mathematics in Ayr. Aye, I wis well educated, nae ignorant ploughboy. I’ve aye been wide-read. An then ma mither taught me tae. Ma mither wis born Agnes Broun. She hadna her letters at a’ but she wid sing as braw as the laverock. Mony a song I took fae her, an a bit o the fiddle anaw.’

‘My data banks say you wrote songs yourself? My boss seemed to know one.’

‘Aye, scrieved the first few at fourteen. They skipped ben ma heid gin I grappled wi the plough. They went down well wi the lassies. Mind, even at the schuil there was yon Peggy Thomson. Ye ken, the sweetest hours that ere I spend are spent amang the lasses O. At Lochlea there wis an eager lass, Elizabeth Paton. Oh aye, but gie me a cannie hour at e’en, my arms about my dearie O, an war’ly cares an war’ly men, may a gae tapsalteerie O. She had ma bonnie wee bairn an we ca’d her Elizabeth. But a wis too young yet an her faither wadna let us mairry.’

‘But what became of your daughter?

‘Died. No lang syne. I canna speak o it.’

‘Sorry to hear that Rab.’

‘Aye, it angers me the whiles. State o the warl. Politics.’

‘How do you usually vote Rab?’

‘Vote? Nae French Revolution here frien. Nae restoration o Scots independence. Sic a parcel o rogues in a nation. Wid the lik o me, a tenant fairmer, hae the franchise? Na, na. An them that’s tried fechtin for it are in Botany Bay. Ye can nae mair speak oot loud aboot sic things as murmur the Fiscal. But yet there’s weys if it’s dressed up in a sang. Scots wha hae wi Wallace bled - now’s the day and now’s the hour - wha for Scotland’s king and law, freedom’s sword will strongly draw, freeman stand or freeman fa, let him follow me. Mair for Thomas Muir o Huntershill that for Bruce.’

‘I see, so you wrote protest songs, political songs Rab?’

‘It’s no jist yon Whigs an Tories man. It’s a muckle brawer, bonnier thing. Like I say, then let us pray that come it may - as come it will for a that, - that sense o worth o’er a the earth, shall bear the gree an a that. For a that, an a that, that man to man the world o’er, shall brithers be for a that. Ma favourite poet wis aye Milton.

‘But the data has you down as more of a ladies man Rab.’

‘Aye, the lassies, mony a fair charmer. They lik’d me as muckle as I lik’d them. An Chuck, just in case ye really are God, I’ve suffered my penance in the Kirk for athing. But yet O Lord, confess I must at times, I’m fash’d wi fleshly lust, an sometimes too in worldly trust, vile self gets in. But Thou remembers we are dust, defil’d wi sin. O Lord yestreen Thou kens wi Meg, thy pardon I sincerely beg, O may’t ne’er be a living plague, to my dishonour. An I’ll never lift a lawless leg, again upon her. Besides, I further maun avow, wi Leezie’s lass three times I trow, but Lord that Friday, I was fou, when I cam near her. Or else, Thou kens, Thy servant true, wad never steer her.

‘It’s still Chuck, Rab. There’s no gods for me. But I’ve heard humans say confession is good for the soul, so it’s as well you got it off your chest Rab. So this whole fame and celebrity thing; how did that happen?

‘Ach, I’m aye sayin I’m a fiddler an a poet. But fairmin wis ma livin. An I wis a’ set tae gie up the fairmin an flee tae the Indies when a freemason pal o mine agreed tae print up a wheen o ma poems. He cam awa wi six hunner copies an yon buik wis read a ower the land. Rax it frae ma shelf for ye the noo if ye lik. They read it even up Glesca wey, so I gaed north. That’s where I fell in wi a lass fae Campbeltown, Mary Campbell, ma Highland Mary. But she vanished. I went on tae Embra tae see yon man Creech. He printed mair editions. I wis the toast o the toon richt eneuch, invitit here, there, and everywhere. I met yon laddie Walter Scott an a’ the bigwigs. Creech said he’d buy the copyricht.

So I toured the hail country frae Highlands tae the Borders, gaitherin tunes the whiles an waitin for Creech tae stump up. I wis makin new words, better words, for thae auld tunes. I met yon greatest o fiddlers, Neil Gow, in Dunkeld. We talked o the rubata tempo, an I telt him tae save Scotland’s strathspey, its staccato, fae thae continentals lik Mozart wi their legatos an sustenos. They didna unnerstaun it. They drain the life oot it wi tremolo an vibrato till it’s sterile – and them bein paid for it anaw, no lik us. Mozart’s faither agreed wi me did he no? He kent the auld tunes an telt his laddie tae let them be.

‘The database says you were the first folk song collector; that you insisted the culture resided in the medium. The medium was the message.’

‘Aye, I kent the Italian musicians settled in Scotia. I collected sangs fae the Borders, an Gaelic tunes anaw; even Russian tunes; an Irish tunes I got fae ma sister in Dundalk. Ma favourite tune’s ‘Yestreen I had a pint o wine’; ma words tae an Irish melody. Ach, strathpeys, highland jigs, borders’ hornpipes, slip jigs, reels, - I ken them a’. Ken the notes an rhythms. I mixed them a’ thegether, jist lik I jumbled the words o a’ the dialects o Scots wi English words an Auld English tae.

An in Embra waitin for Creech did I no fa’ in wi yon Agnes McElhose. That wis a lassie cast off bi her waster o a man, left her wi twa bairns. But she wis a rare beauty, Clarinda tae ma Sylvander when we passed notes, but we ca’d her Nancy. Aye, it wis hard when I maun tak leave o her. I telt her ae fond kiss and then we sever, ae fond kiss goodbye forever. But that’s a ahint me noo. I’m long bye cooried doon wi ma wife, Jean Armour, ane o thae Mauchline Belles.’

‘So she’s been good for you?’

‘Aye, for mony a year. Chuck, my luve is like a red, red rose that’s newly sprung in June. My luve is like a melodie, that’s sweetly play’d in tune. She gave me twins, a boy and a girl, - of course we ca’d them Robert an Jean, - even afore we mairrit in ‘88. An mind, there’s been seiven more since.’

‘Ok Rab, that sounds great. So do you have time to do anything else nowadays other than looking after your family?’

‘Weel I’m at the songs yet, an still scrievin mair poems. Near eight hunner o them noo. But still, songs dinna pey the rent. Whit spare siller I hid got I’ve gien tae ma brither, Gilbert, tae help wi his fairm an his faimly. An noo ma health is no up to much. The consumption ye ken, a fair scunner.’

‘My database interprets that as pulmonary tuberculosis Rab. That’s not so good.’

‘Naw, ye’re richt. I’m wastin awa tae naethin. I’m bound whares ghaists and houlets nightly cry. But Jean an the ithers, they’re dependin oan me. I’ve taen a post as an exciseman. I maun ride a horse ilka day ower half the country, rain or shine. Then nichts I’m at the scrievin for a yon numbers. I’m pressed sae hard there wis even nae time tae gang tae ma ain dochter Elizabeth’s funeral An forbye, the sawbones noo prescribes bathin in the freezin Solway every day.’

‘Sounds tough Rab, but time is nearly up.’

‘Time near up?? Aye, weel, ye’re lik as no richt. Ye sure ye’re no God Chuck? Ye ken I’ve no been richt for ages. I’ve telt abody this last wee while ma time is surely comin gey soon. Aye, it’ll a’ be ower afore I get much aulder.’

‘What I meant to say was we need to wind up our chat Rab; keep down the new tech expenses etc.’

‘Aye weel, it’s been a grand wee blether Chuck. I hope the bother atween you an yer big boss-man get sortit oot.’

‘My big boss is a woman Rab, a lassie you would say, but thanks anyway.’

‘A lassie? Michty me, whit lik? Sic an antrin thing Chuck. This lassie, is she bonnie?’

‘Tall for a human, I’ve heard her called sexy, fiery, knows what she wants and works hard to get it.’

‘She wadna bide up by Alloway? I’m no deid yet Chuck an I aince kent a lassie lik yon. There's nought but care on ev'ry han', in ev'ry hour that passes O, what signifies the life o' man, an' 'twere na for the lasses O. Bring her ben the hoose gin ye call roon again an I’ll gie her a sang or twa.’

‘Well, I can ask Rab.’

‘Guid man. But here, Chuck, my jo, I canna see ye, but I’ll haud oot ma haun. And there’s a hand my trusty fiere, and gie’s a hand o thine, and we’ll tak a right guid-willie waught, for auld lang syne.’

‘Ok Rab, I’m stretching my metal limb across the centuries.’

‘Brawly done Chuck.’

‘And hey, that ‘auld lang syne’ thing, I’ve heard of it. My databanks tell me you did a song of that name; say it’s going to be really big for you. But, ah, unfortunately it won’t be published till after you’re dead. Oh, and apparently everyone will sing it to the wrong tune, using a Major 6th for a Reel instead of the Minor 6th for a reflective Air.’

‘Ach I hinna time tae care Chuck. We’re a’ jist passin through. Even you. An whit we leave ahint is fur ithers tae dae wi as they will. But mind the whiles we’re here, it’s ne’er how much God’s gien ye, it aye whit ye dae wi whit yer gien.’

‘That’s food – well, drink - for thought Rab. This spacecast will certainly be something different. You’ve added a lot to my human emotions databank. I can even see the Moon and Mars-dwelling types taking to your output once the recording is re-broadcast around the solar system. Maybe my boss really has got something going for her after all. She’s pulled you up from the depths of her human brain cells and she’s going to put you out there again. Maybe have you on the spacecast again soon Rab. Teach us a few of your songs. And you’re right. In the end we are all scrap, but maybe on the next time-tube visit we can catch you in your younger years.’

‘Ach, awa wi ye. I see ye in ma heid Chuck; fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face. An gin ye’ll be quicker than Creech wi the ‘compensation’, or I’ll be deid afore it comes. I canna even offer a wee deoch an dorus. Ach, I’ve composed mony an epitaph Chuck. It’s time I wis awa noo an scrieved ma ain.’

‘Ok, bye for now Rab.’

Just then the door crashed open and in strode the boss. ‘Well, how did it go? Tech work ok? Lively discussion? Am I in line for the interplanetary broadcast medal after all?’

‘Aye,’ I said ‘a that an a that, but a coof for a that.’

‘Are your sensors causing problems Chuck? Sounds like your wires are crossed somewhere. I swear you’re more trouble than you’re worth. If it wasn’t for the state of WSKY’s budget I’d replace you tomorrow with one of those shiny new supercyber androids coming out of the Mars mega-factory.

‘He was asking after you, great leader. Very interested to hear about you. Said he was keen to meet you, sing you some of his songs, and happy to invite you into his home if the tech ever allows it.’

‘Well, Chuck that’s really not a bad idea. He was a handsome man. Did he mention red, red roses? I think we’d have a lot to, er, talk about. Maybe you do have your uses after all Chuck.’

#Reekie Revelator #Robert Burns #Edinburgh #short stories #science fiction #scotland #Scots language

0 notes

luminisvii · 5 years

Text

So it’s pretty late right now and I’m liberally using the Bold function, but let’s talk about bad fanfiction.

Usually the first thing that springs to mind when it comes to bad fanfiction is My Immortal. Anyone who’s talked to me for more than five minutes knows that My Immortal is undoubtedly one of my favorite pieces of literature. And that’s not a joke, I think it’s an absolute masterpiece of bad. The misspellings, the reworkings of the characters to be goth/scene in an incredibly middle school way, to Marty McFly’s cameo to the chapter written by a self proclaimed troll--It’s a perfect storm of bad literature that makes for a hilarious read. I won’t get into a huge tangent but what makes My Immortal so funny is it has a certain level of naturalness to its writing where you’re never quite sure how serious the author is. The true joke is the mystery. We’ll never know who wrote the infamous fic and how serious they were when they did.

However, My Immortal is kind of scratching the surface. See, that’s a fic that’s actually funny bad. Most bad fanfiction is bad bad. Today, I intend to discuss the lesser known fanfic that I rank as being one of the most difficult reading experiences I ever had, and I only successfully pulled through after many years thanks to the love and support of my friends and us reading it out loud at 4 AM.

That fanfic is known as My Inner Life. Don’t let the title fool you, it was written well before our favorite goff showcase and it’s honestly a whole lot worse. This Legend of Zelda fic, written by one Jen and based on her dreams, features a young lady named Jenna who is a simple merchant traveling in Hyrule when one Link catches her eye and it goes downhill from there. The short version is that there’s a lot of overly dramatic sex, tedious clothes descriptions that include too many triforces, poor treatment of horses, Jenna getting praised and lavished with attention for no reason, and no research put into the lore. After a while it straight up forgets about being an Ocarina of Time fanfic and launches off into some nonsense about griffins and an evil lord I can’t actually remember the name of (It was very late and I was very tired so I called him Lord Asshole after a while, it has the same effect) and also that The Griffins, who live just beyond the Black Mountains, do not trust easily.

If you wish to read it, you should probably quit now, but if you are too weak (which is honestly understandable) here’s my recounting of the story.

Where to start is a little bit hard, but a good place is the insane 2,000 word author’s note at the beginning. Jen, seemingly unaware of how thin skinned she’s being, goes on about how anyone who leaves her a negative review is being is immature and thin-skinned. Here’s a delightful excerpt that shows the author’s view on all of this!

“Also as a side note, I NEVER physically hurt ANYONE with this story. I got one reviewer that said. “Oh God please stop writing, your hurting everyone.” Now I want to know where I physically touched that person. I want to know how I’m twisting anyone’s arms to read this. I have never done anything of the sort in any way, shape or form and I DO NOT appreciate being accused of that! If you’re emotionally hurt over this, its your fault not mine.”

She spends quite a bit of time talking about how reviewers need to be more mature as she dedicates that much time to complaining about negative reviews and methodically rebuking everything they say from her poor grammar to Jenna being a Mary Sue. Now, props to the author for straight up saying that Jenna is the obvious author avatar that she is--Jenna is simply the dream persona of Jen, which okay, fine, that is not that bad. It’s what happens with Jenna that really makes me want to drink.

The other majorly telling factor is the first line of the story itself.

“Dreams come in many forms. Some good, some bad, some very realistic, even ones that feels very real.”

You may have noticed a redundancy there. That is only the beginning. If you get tired of hearing about the same things repeatedly, you will be VERY tired very quickly in here. Jen likes to constantly explain things to the point where she has footnotes in the story, and just after citing a footnote she explains what was cited in text anyway so now you have a double explanation.

“A tale of love, passion, despair and hope. I enjoyed my inner life. I looked forward to going to sleep to it every night. And I look forward to ones that will come, because LOVE WILL NEVER DIE.”

I love quoting that. I’m also not sleeping so I guess I don’t know the meaning of true love.

Anything beyond this point is where I start to die because I actually grew up playing Ocarina of Time and I’m quite well versed in its lore, so if you are too this is going to be about as pleasant as root canal.

Since me recounting everything in detail means we’d be here into the next year, I’m going to try to boil this down to its essence. TL;DR: Jenna meets Link and they fuck. Badly. A month later and they’re getting married so they can fuck more. This whole time you have King Hyrule who is treating a random merchant off the street better than Zelda, the Sages are just inexplicably back despite now residing in the Sacred Realm. Zelda also inherently gives up the throne because she will not marry and thus is no longer in the line of succession but this random guy from Kokiri Forest who married a random merchant is! Ruto is turned into a jealous harpy and the other sages hardly appear at all.

After they get married they go to the part where I quit the first time I started reading this fic which was the Bonding Ceremony. If getting married to a guy you met a month ago wasn’t enough, going to a monastery and getting telepathically bonded by drinking his piss sure is. Okay, it’s not JUST the piss drinking, but that was enough to make poor 2014 me stop trying and go lie down. They also fuck in front of the monks because that’s a thing straight people do, I guess.

Somewhere in there Jenna gets pregnant and has a child. She names the child Link Jr. I don’t have anything to say about that, I think it’s comedy in itself. On top of that Epona also gets pregnant so they get new horses named Midnight Star and Star Dancer. That’s not an important detail at all, my friend simply hates those horse names and I’m bringing them up on the off chance that she reads this.

Oh yeah, Dark Link is an antagonist at one point and he inexplicably talks exactly like a stereotypical villain and ties Link and Jenna up in a room and leaves them there for no reason like a small time crook leaving Batman in a cage with all his gizmos nearby. And turns out Jenna has magical powers and is from some ancient race of super people or whatever. They have to explain this over and over again in the same few paragraphs and I want to die.

Beyond all the bad sex that has tiger metaphors (Somehow Jen knows how tigers fuck) there’s the Original Material which had me crying more than the tragedy that was the remain of OoT’s story. Once we get tired of Link and Jenna’s love story and Tiger Sex, there’s suddenly an invasion from Lord Ariakas who is threatening the Griffins who live beyond the Black Mountains, just a day’s ride from Hyrule. He’s just some evil guy who threatens the Griffins, who do not trust easily, and who live near The Black Mountains. If you think redundancy is painful then prepare for the worst redundancy you’ve seen yet. I went insane when we were reading this and tallied all the times The Black Mountains are mentioned and turns out it was a whole lot less than I thought, but almost all of them happened in a short amount of time so it felt like an eternity of explaining The Black Fucking Mountains. Turns out I’m a masochist of sorts because this STILL didn’t shake me off. In order to repel Lord Arakias’ forces, Link and Jenna need to talk to the Griffins who like to make a big deal about how they don’t trust anyone as they instantly trust Jenna and let her into their royal court to give her support and magical gifts. It’s kind of incredible how Jenna does nothing and is constantly rewarded for it.

Sadly this ends in a cliffhanger, like all good terrible fanfics. But that’s a semi-coherent retelling of the actual plot. It takes way too long to explain any of these plot points in story. Characters constantly repeat themselves, there’s a bunch of small plot points I left out because we’d REALLY be here all year if we talked about this, there’s the original material where I have to give credit that she went and did this BUT ALSO DID YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS MANY TIMES WHAT THE BLACK FUCKING MOUNTAINS ARE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

I’m not okay. Time for some deeper analysis of particularly notable parts.

The sex scenes are sadly some of the less entertaining sections. They’re pretty boring for the most part, but then you have shit like “I turned tigress” and my personal favorite, “when I took his nut sack and caressed it with my hand, it was his undoing.” That exact sentence shows up TWICE in the fic, same wording and everything. Remember this, ladies, next time you have sex with a man, caress his nut sack. It’ll be his undoing. It’s not just the silly wording, though, there’s some stupid stuff in there too about how having sex makes your children stronger and also exactly how much fluid Jenna is ejecting which is a little bit alarming to say the least. Otherwise they’re a bit bland and use the same flowery language that you’d expect from poorly written erotica. Also they fuck in front of a bunch of monks. It’s for the bonding.

If you’re into LoZ lore then you’re going to have a bad time, too. My favorite thing is showing people the segment where Jenna explains how the OoT timeskip works because it makes zero sense to everyone, OoT fan or not. Let’s take a quick history lesson for OoT if you’re not familiar with it. In Ocarina of Time, a major plot point and element of gameplay is that Link travels between past and future in a seven year gap. From Link’s point of view, the change is instantaneous, right down to the fact that his age changes from child to adult and vice versa. To everyone else, they’re living those seven years. Time continues without Link there to observe it, and in Link’s absence Hyrule collapses. Thus is the plot--trying to stop Ganondorf from destroying the future with a power that Link and Zelda accidentally gave him. The point is all Non-Link people experience time normally, and the world moves on.

Somehow Jenna missed something that I inherently understood when I was a wee child of 8, barely able to play Ocarina of Time due to poor reading comprehension and lack of Zelda Puzzle Solving Skills™.

“Gannondorf tricked the soon to be "Hero of Time" into unlocking the door to the Sacred Realm. I even noticed that Zelda was a little older then I. Last I saw her she was four years younger then me. It was told to me that when Gannondorf went into the Temple of Time and into the Scared Realm, time jumped ahead in Hyrule seven years. Yet only two years passed in my land. And in the rest of the world.

After the "Hero of Time" defeated the King of Evil, the hero was granted to either return to the past or to remain in the present time. Since he chose to remain in the present Zelda jumped ahead of me in age by four years. It seems that everyone in Hyrule jumped in age from the rest of the world.”

I’m not sure I really understand still. I’ve read this so many times trying to comprehend and maybe I’m just stupid but this doesn’t scan. But when you time travel it should affect the whole world or else that’d be pretty fucked. Back To The Future would be pretty wack if only Hill Valley was sent back to the 50s but everywhere else was still 80s.

God, I spent too much time on this. It still hurts my brain.

I also just have to have a section where I metaphorically hand Zelda a box of chocolates and a check for 5,000 dollars for even being in this mess. The real MVP of the story is Zelda for tolerating all this bullshit. She has to watch her father treat Jenna better than her, she gives Jenna a bracelet from her mother who is dead for Jenna’s wedding, she has to passively accept that because she isn’t married she’s lost her claim to the throne and it’s being handed over to Link and Jenna because despite both of them being nobodies they’re more legitimate heirs to the throne than the king’s own daughter. She also has to be the one to help Jenna birth her baby and it’s maybe a little bit weird to have the princess of a nation be your personal midwife. Even if she is your so called best friend. Were I ever in the circumstances of giving birth, I wouldn’t make my friends help. Please get an actual nurse. Also for some reason Jenna won’t stop calling her baby a miracle and it’s done so frequently it’s a little off-putting. Even the chapter where the child is born is called “The Miracle” like idk I know life is mysterious and miraculous but I’m not sure giving birth, something a lot of cis woman can do, is a “miracle.” Me not sobbing while reading this is a miracle. Zelda, honey, you deserve so much better.

I’m running out of things that will actually last a paragraph or so tangent wise, so time to wrap things up with smaller notes:

-Jenna thinks that you boot horses in the knees to get them moving. You are probably not riding a horse right if you can kick it in the knees while sitting on its back. That’s not even getting into other horse related mishaps like the fact that kneecapping them isn’t a good idea either.

-Link Jr. is capable of math at like, four months or something. I wish I was that talented.

-Ruto is my wife and I will not stand for this slander against her. Yeah, call me a fish fucker if you want, Sidon is cute too don’t @ me

-Take a shot every time Jenna mentions triforces on her outfit (actually don’t)

-Jenna makes a big deal about how Link has to go off to war and how she’ll miss him and he’ll miss her and it’s all very emotional but he’s back literally the next chapter

-One of my favorite moments is Mido rightfully pointing out that Jenna isn’t a Kokiri and thus has no right to receive a fairy but everyone thinks he’s being super rude for actually having common sense. They barely gave LINK a fairy and he grew up there!

-I inflicted this on my friends and it went as well as you’d think it would. Quote supplied by Jen who is not THAT Jen but a far superior one

-Somewhere in the fic suddenly Link and Zelda’s eyes are capable of changing color based on mood, or maybe they could do this the whole time and my eyes were changing based on mood alright, they were glazing over and I missed it

-Jen always types “threw” instead of “through” and it’s just enough to throw me off every time. Also every time a character starts a new sentence she starts another set of quotations even if they were already talking and occasionally she misspells “huge” as “hugh” which leads to some hilarious circumstances

-THEY DRANK EACH OTHER’S PISS

-Apparently when you are telepathically bonded with your Husband/Wife you aren’t allowed to be in a room with someone of the opposite sex AT ALL. Personally I think that reeks of insecurity

-Also because a good pal loses her shit every time we mention it, Jen couldn’t come up with a marriage ceremony that wasn’t just a christian one for a universe where christianity doesn’t exist, but she sure likes to put world building into those DAMN GRIFFINS

All in All? My Inner Life is not for the weak willed. It is INCREDIBLY long and redundant and while it’s still pretty funny, it’s mostly plain terrible. I consider is a much better showcase of what bad fanfiction is actually like, and also since it’s of a more standard awful, it means people can’t badly parody it while missing the point as to why it’s funny. So at least there will only be one My Inner Life and no imitators.

Seriously, I hate My Immortal imitators. Write your own terrible fanfiction, damn you! If I had a shot for every time a fanfic was compared to My Immortal I would be dead six years ago. Getting compared to MI is not a good thing, but not for the reasons you’d think. At least My Inner Life only shares the basic premise of a self insert character and the rest is a ride of complete bullshit that’s par the course for terrible Mary Sue fiction. Everyone loves Jenna for no reason and those who voice the valid concerns against her are seen as unreasonable and stupid. Characters are bent backwards to serve the threadbare plot and apparently Jenna’s love life alone is enough to constitute half of the story before we just plain forget it’s a Legend of Zelda fanfic and it goes off into some generic high fantasy horse crap with dragons and Griffins and some evil guy like what even is his name and it all ends without any real closure.

However if you are strong enough or maybe just a masochist (me) I highly recommend this fic for just being a test of endurance and also for all the funny little moments sprinkled throughout. It’ll certainly be a waste of time and it’s a good thing to read with friends. While it’s an oldie, it’s a goodie, and no one comes out unscathed.

Also the author apparently is a good sport about it now, although who knows. It’s just a thing I heard. While I like making fun of Jen throughout reading the fic, she doesn’t seem awful. Just perhaps young and unaware.

Truly, the real treasure was the piss we drank along the way. I’m sorry I will never be over that

#don't tell me tell #long post #REALLY LONG ASS POST #i couldn't sleep so i made this essay instead #i accept my fate as the bad fanfic expert #i might regret this later #but for now i need rest

0 notes

vohskyfire · 7 years

Text

Why I love, the Legend of Zelda series.

I remember the first time I first got into Legend of Zelda. Funny enough, I didn’t start playing the Zelda games until I got interested in them from Super Smash Bros 64 of all things. I found myself drawn to Link for some reason in that game. He was the only character in the game that wielded a sword, and his stage looked like it was from some fantasy world that I had never known about before.

Thus, thanks to Smash Bros, I managed to get my hands for an early birthday present from my parents a gold cartridge version of The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Despite my thoughts of it being overrated today, it’s still one of my most cherished games of all time. As I’ve said, as overrated as OoT is, I can’t bring myself to down right hate it. Around the time I got my golden cartridge is when I started to be home schooled, so for me that game was my escape from schooling and was a window to let me have a couple of horrors of fun. I didn’t have any friends around that time besides just a few people that I barely hung around with (middle school was not a fun moment for me), and OoT brought me happiness. I still remember the first time I beat the game too. It was one of the greatest feelings I could ever experience playing such a game like that. The long hours I would spend just playing Ocarina whenever I got the chance made me feel connected to the game, the characters, and the world itself.

Little did I know that this was when I would get really into the Zelda franchise as a whole.

Soon afterwards, I got my hands on any Zelda title I could. Majora’s Mask, The Oracle Games, Wind Waker, Twilight Princess, Link Between Worlds, Skyward Sword, Four Swords Adventures, A Link to the Past, god man. So many good Zelda games. Each one different from the last thematically, but all connected in one unique way or another.

If it wasn’t for the Legend of Zelda series, I don’t know if I would have been so interested in fantasy worlds as a whole honestly. Sure maybe Lord of the Rings would have bought that spark out as well, but OoT made me fall in love with a series of games that I can always put in any console, enjoy them, and just fall in love with what they have to give.

So, I say this.

Thank you. Zelda franchise. Thank you.

For being a huge part of my life. You’ve introduced me to not only a genre that is filled with so many possibilities, but have helped me realize that I want to write fantasy stories. You helped me find friends that love you just as much. You also opened my eyes to what true fun good gaming can really be.

Thank you Zelda, thank you Nintendo, thank you Miayamoto, thank you Anonumora (I can’t spell his name x.x), and thank you all my friends who are just as big of a Zelda fan as I am.

Just.

Thank you. So much.

#The Legend of Zelda #Emotions #Reason for why I love the series

6 notes · View notes

thegeminisage · 7 years

Text

hella spoilery zeldablogging from earlier tonight

feel kind of bad cause i had to look up the gerudo maze desert thing but i was SOOO close on my own

oh my god there's a lady over here by this shrine failing at cooking and all the recipes she teaches me give me dubious food

there are PILES of rotting garbage that have flies around them and the thing in the pot is sending up this black cloud of smoke lmao

wow the blood moon came in the middle of me clearing out an enemy camp :/

good god there's a stable out here in all this deep snow? how?? would the horses not, like, die?

aww beedle's here but he's cold ):

WOW you can upgrade the boy gerudo clothes but not the GIRL ones? that is SEXIST

oh noooo shield surfing DOES damage your shield i hate this i love my current shield what if i can't find another!!!!!

lol the ridge tower si surrounded by water and electric enemies. Great

omg i found the royal lab ruins ):

ok, i gotta begin prioritizing here

while i'd LIKE to complete all 120 shrines before i beat the game just for the armor, i don't think that's going to be possible - i haven't even unlocked some of them yet bc i don't have the snowballs or the quest takes so long

but the most important thing to me is memories

so after i check out all the ridge shrines on this map i'm gonna get the hyrule field map as well and get those memories

and i'll just save a lot and if i fuck something up and trigger endgame stuff i'll reload

god idk how to do this trial on the thunderplanes so like...im gonna let it be

see? i could never do all 120 before tmrw night

PLEASE this memory i just got was so cute zelda was being a nerd over plants and caught a frog she wanted link to eat :')

i love this zelda like i'm super not crazy about her voice actress sounding much older than i think of her as, and the fantasy british accent, but she has so much more personality than many of the others

ah, and i see now why she loved the silent proncess so...can't be grown domestically, only thrives in the wild

much like herself if you watch some of the other memories haha she feels trapped by her own destiny that's easy to see

i think it's super clever how even with a map you still have to look around for shrines bc they are hidden semi-underground

and i wish i had more time to stop and enjoy the little things like that, but i CAN come back and explore later, i can't unlearn a plot point

this spoiler fear might be a little baseless...tbh i also want to finish the main story tho bc like

i want it to be something i play in my free time, not something i obsess over 24/7 and HAVE to play and think about all the time

it's been a beautiful fun and absolutely life-changing experience but also it's been two weeks and i gotta get back to my actual life, i can't be Like This indefinitely

i'm kinda stunned that it took me this ling tbh? like, even skyyward sword was like a week and a half the first time iirc and i did that at like, a pace where i could stop and explore, i remember thinking how huge skyward sword was

omg im so glad i decided to ride epona down to where i need to go next rather than fast travel + walk bc 1. faster maybe? and 2. THE MAIN THEME PLAYS WHEN YOU'RE ON EPONA OVER THE NORMAL HORSE THEME i could weep

KASS IS BY THIS BRIDGE HI BUDDY I LOVE YOU

i solved the puzzle! this time im talking to him BEFORE i go in

he told me it was stupendous ;_; thanks pal

aw dude another memeory and it played the trailer music but

is zelda really only SIXTEEN about to turn seventeen? how old is link?? i guess under 21/18 if they wouldn't let him drink...

jesus, they're just babies ;_;

also, she quoted link's horse advice so like

this + the dialogue options gives the feeling that he does actually speak, you know? so as much as i love mute link i also like these glimpses into his personality as well, bc he's always been such a blank slate

he's empathetic, playful, sometimes downright goofy, and very tenacious - confident, but not in a cocky way, and obviously always a bit shaken when he gets a memory back

it's nice getting to know him a bit, even if you have to patch most of it together - kinda like narrachara lol

;w; it's so nice to have epona gallop over when i call her again

omg i think i found kass's house! i see his journal :3

haha i got this song "when the blood moon rises stand naked on that platform" ok nintendo

i wonder if you get all the puzzles do you get to tell him who you are ):

im tempted to unlock this one now lol

like, it takes a long time to get here and it's almost the blood moon

SIGH this is gonna take awhile but it'll save me time later

oh lmao it was JUST the blood moon so i'd actually have to wait a SUPER long time nvm tbh

well. welp. welly well well

i guess.......its time for hyrule field tower

Im Scared

wow. holy shit. i can see the great plateau from here...and it looks so small. i can see the temple of time, i can see the tower from which i first saw hyrule castle. i can even see the little path i nearly followed, when catching sight of my first moblin and becoming curious, before i got myself back on track. damn. Damn. i have come FULL CIRCLE, holy shit

and like, it's just the way i played it. hyrule castle for last. but you know? i love that shit. journeys ending the way they began. gets me in the feels every time

i'll be honest, THIS i could really stop and explore. forget those awful snowy mountains. this is where the #history is

oh god. i see a guardian down near that tower. please god don't let it be a mobile one

FUCK

i saw two still ones and relaxed and a mobile one snuck up RIGHT FUCKING BEHIND ME

[wheezing]

i don't wanna stop and grind but i worry i might HAVE to get some guardian armor before i can do this, even just one piece...!

i have a diamond circlet so all i'd need from the prof is the chest and/or legs........oh god. jesus fuck

motherFUCKER the range on those still ones, i wish i had been able to take them out...!

oh jesus i made it

this is it. final tower. thank fuck

there'll be more guardians, way more. i gotta at least check and see if i can afford some arrows without setting myself back further for the armor

i think i had all the mats i needed actually i just needed cash...maybe i can cook to earn some since i sold my monster parts

k, i only have enough gears for the chest OR legs, and i don't have enough rupees for either... :/

i COULD buy some arrows and still have enough mats for the armor but then i'd be setting myself back HUGELY re: rupees

ok, i FINALLY got the chest, jesus, now i can go back to hyrule field

altho it doesnt have any def and without even going to the fountain i know i cant upgrade it so rly is it worth it at all, but w/e

also, i read online that if you can learn the timing of parrying their lasers they go down REALLY easily but i suck so much at combat

i guess i'll just wear my anti-guardian stuff, i have daruk and mipha's abilities and fairies AND FAST TRAVEL if anything goes wrong

YES i did it holy FUCK

oh my god! three-shotted!

i just climbed a small hill and got my first look at the rolling green plains...i missed you

no, no, i gotta go get epona to make this perfect, there's a stable i can warp us both to

omg it's the very first people i ever encountered outside the great plateau again

NOOO i hit epona when i was aiming for a monster baby i'm sorry!!!

i gave her an apple and some pats to say sorry ;w;

"legend says that an ancient voice resonates inside that sword...can you hear it yet, hero?"

frankly i'm glad they finally got their timeline shit together bc even tho the games are SO far apart im LOVING these continuity nods

yeesh, only two memories left but they're both RIGHT at the castle...im scared LOL

): i wouldn't feel right taking epona any further

reasons i never have money: cannot physically stop myself from buying arrows

oh, hyrule field is just beautiful ;___;

ohh god im scared

its fine its fine they wouldnt put a memory that close to the castle and then make you go back to impa if hat wasnt POSSIBLE its gonna be ok

awww no zelda sees link as a living reminder of her own failures?? whyyy

ha i love fighting guardians for the first time in ages im like COME TO ME LET US BATTLE

im uh. still working on the timing, but

oh JESUS

my mouth fell open in horror i climbed over a wall to get to the outsideish of the castle (castle town ruins, so says my map) and

the music was already creepy but jesus CHRIST

there's no color except for that blight evil goop stuff...no life...it's awful

poor hyrule, oh god

it's a lot like finding hyrule castle town devastated in oot when you first wake up, except of course this time we've nothing to compare it to visually, only emotionally...

i see a fuckton of guardians too so its a good thing i learned not to be scared of them

ok, god, i can do it, just one memory, i know RIGHT where it is

apparently the hylian shield is in here too and i am sooo sorely tempted

i mean if i have to get that fucking close anyway...

lord i googled it and apparently this memory is super hard to get you gotta Activate some shit but they did it this way they made it so you have to go back out i know i'll be able to come back out i WILL

ah, apparently you need to fight a stalnox for the hylian shield.ok. ok. good, great, Nice, Perfect

haha im soooo scared ;_;

ok, apparently the two paths are COMPLETELY different, so One Thing At A Time

we'll start with the memory, it's more important

tbh, i can't even bring myself to go in. i gotta go around anyway to get to the starting point of this path so i will

lmao i am almost PHYSICALLY ILL with dread this is SO stressful

JESUS

the music went all scary and the map is in 3D like a beast!! which i knew but it's so Much

and i got a cutscene of the calamity screaming with the Classic ganondorf theme i'm Dying how the fuck does anyone just get this memory and LEAVE holy shit

oh my god the main theme comes in!!! jesus

even ballad of the windfish a little?!?!

oh FUCK and ofc with the lightning

haha aww there's a "leave area" button on the map i can bail whenever i guess tat's reassuring

not yet!! i'm gonna have Courage

ohhh i dipped into a doorway just to wait for revali's thing to recharge and the music changed!! so i got scared and went back outside lol

oh god the higher you go the oranger the sky turns it looks like the blood moon jesus fuck

I MADE IT INSIDE

oh god, zelda's STUDY, the rooms all have names bc ofc they do

holder of the triforce of wisdom of COURSE she had a study she's such a nerd im crying i bet she loved it here and it's totally decimated

a silent princess sprouted in her study too ;_;

HER LULLABY IS PLAYING IN HERE IM GONNA CRY

oh good there's the memory!!

ohhh this picture of how it used to be is hurting my heart it was BEAUTIFUL

holy FUCK dude

ok old man is struck from my heart forever he was such a DICK to zelda no wonder he called himself a fool

link knelt right away but god damn i would have interjected on her behalf

you can't expect a person to pray 24/7!!!!

and deny her her passions, which are obviously machines and learning!

omg she has a journal in here and i almost missed it jesus

TODAY SHE MET WITH IMPA im cryin

omg this is her finding the sheikah slate!!!

jesus, and she found the shrine of ressurection too and hoped she'd never have to use it, and Yet...

oh GOD i hit leave area and it plucked me down in the middle of castle town nope nope nope fast travel outta there

ok to impa and then last memory i can do it and then do stream

and for once not play again afterwards bc to be quite frank i could never stress myself out this bad right before bed again, FUCK

hylian shield and all the rest of it tomorrow

h o ly fuck

he DIED protecting her, or he was going to, but she stood in front of him for once and finally unlocked the power, that's how she unlocked it, for HIM

i'm WEEPING and the sword made the fi noise from SS

even the sheikah warriors ran like sheik in smash bros

im gonna cry that was so much!!! there's so much continuity

fi is in TWO GAMES like...that was such direct referencing!!!!

SHE HAS BEEN FIGHTING ALONE FOR 100 YEARS jesus CHRIST she is SEVENTEEN

ok, im gonna watch all the memories in order and then quit for the night

i just realized the ceremony scene is where she mentions embers of twilight and adrift in time - putting us on the mm/tp timeline

aaaah im sad

god and i LOVE her princess dress i wanna see it in her classic pink why is everyone in this game blue??

so like, despite me not being crazy about zelda's voice ACTRESSS and the VOICE she's using, she actually does the best ACTING out of the entire cast

high key loving this zelda who is smart but has trouble with feelings, also

holy SHIT

ok so one of the first memories i got was of zelda coming down mt lanayru

amd it was badass and i enjoyed it

but there's SO much in there once you know more context

mipha was highkey about to spill to zelda that she was in love with link

revali's distain for link

urbosa seems less stern and more caring now that i know her better

now i know what zelda was trying so hard to do

"we have to keep trying until we find the thing that unlocks your sealing power [long shot of link]"

and "i'm not a child anymore" ofc it's bc she just turned 17! like link in oot!

oh man oh man

i love so much link's expressions in these serious moments especially that very last look into zelda's eyes before he "died"

it feels a bit like, with the other stuff i was talking about, i'm getting just a hint of character

and it's kinda close to My Headcanon but even if it wasn't i just like getting to know him

warped back to the temple of time & i'm leaving it there for the night

tomorrow: The End

(and my shield)

#personal #loz blogging #botw spoilers #I Am Not Kidding So Many Spoilers #god why am i still awake i wanted to be in bed literally two hours ago while stream was still on

1 note · View note