#gonna have to shut down my blog cause they one upped me so bad

[rinneverse]

࿐ ♡ ˚ . 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚! — 𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒓𝒊 𝒚𝒖𝒖𝒋𝒊. ˒ ⊹

me and my roommate get drunk one night and end up fucking!!!! oh my god, this is so awkward…

୨ৎ syn. it’s your final year of uni—after midterms come to a close, you decide to celebrate by getting absolutely SMASHED with your roommate, itadori yuuji. much to your chagrin, this decision comes with a boatload of consequences. how do you navigate the awkward morning after with your golden retriever of a roommate!? (4.8k)

୨ৎ pairing. itadori yuuji x f!reader

୨ৎ cw. modern au, fem!reader, both yuuji and reader are in their final year of uni and are implied to be 21+, alcohol mentions, drunk sex, dubious consent (read prev warning), pet names used (baby, pretty, angel), oral (f!receiving), fingering, vaginal sex, creampie, dealing w/ the repercussions of fucking your roommate the morning after (but it ended up alot more fluffier and romantic than i intended because i love him), minors + ageless blogs dni! 18+ content under the cut!!

୨ৎ love, oak! oh christ almighty. i like itadori yuuji a normal amount. i just really really think he'd make the perfect boyfriend ever. first time writing for him so hoping and praying he isn’t incredibly ooc but regardless,, hope u guys like this i wrote it with my entire clit :3 crossposted to ao3 here!

[ main m.list! ┊coming soon... ]

“Yuu~ji!”

Your lilting voice carries through the shared living space of your apartment. Shuffling in through the entryway, the door clicks shut behind you as you peer around the corner of the entrance hallway.

“You there? Yu?”

You hear a muted groan come from the couch in response.

Toeing off your shoes with a giggle and setting them onto the shoe-rack (the same shoe-rack you constantly have to pester Yuuji about—”Yu, don’t just leave your shoes on the floor! The rack is right there!”—every other day), you peek over the back of the fluffy couch in the living area and find Yuuji sprawled on his stomach over it, face shoved in a pillow.

“How are you feeling?” you ask.

“Like I’m dying,” comes his muffled reply.

You reach a hand down to tousle his already messy bubblegum pink hair. He weakly bats a hand at you.

“Surely you can live a little longer for a night out with your favorite roommate?”

With a grunt, Yuuji flips over, lying on his back. He blinks once, twice. Then he grins; that familiar, radiant grin that makes your heart speed up a little in your chest. You can feel your own smile widen in response.

“I think I can do that,” he says, propping himself up on his elbows. He tilts his head at you. “You’re not gonna pass out on me again though, are you?”

Your eyes narrow slightly in challenge. Bringing your face closer to his by leaning over the couch, you reply snarkily, “and you’re not gonna force me to shoulder you the whole way home again, are you?”

Yuuji’s eyes widen at the new proximity, a faint rosiness rising to his cheeks that makes you giddy. His throat bobs before he replies, “No, promise I won’t.”

You think you see his eyes flick down momentarily—towards the swell of your chest, exposed by the low-cut top you had chosen to wear today—causing a smug sense of satisfaction to pool in your tummy. You lean further, the urge to be a tease winning out over your usual sense: over the notion that you shouldn’t be flirting with the guy you live with. It's entirely a bad idea (and yet here you are, doing it anyways).

Yuuji’s lips part slightly; when he meets your gaze again, there’s hunger shining in his big brown eyes, hazy and diluted by conflict. You can see the inner strife going on in his head already: he shouldn’t be feeling this way about his roommate. He shouldn’t be a perv.

You shouldn’t be feeling this way about him either, but you just can’t help yourself. Something about the way he’s looking at you fills you with a streak of confidence that throws all common sense out of the window.

“Good. Be ready at 7?” Your tone has noticeably lowered, nearly a purr even as you smile innocently down at him.

Yuuji swallows again, still looking like a deer caught in the headlights. “Sure—okay. Sounds good!” He babbles nervously.

It’s cute. He’s cute.

“Cool. ‘m gonna get a nap in then.”

He nods his head slowly. The tension hovers in the air between you, so palpable you could cut it with a knife. Slowly, ever so slowly, you straighten, watching as his eyes never leave your form. You bite your lip and offer Yuuji a softer smile before you turn on your heel and make your way to your bedroom.

You can feel the way his eyes bore holes into your back as you walk away, skirt swishing with every step. You purposefully sway your hips a little more despite yourself and you think you hear him choke slightly, a sound that makes you feel much more smug than it realistically should.

As you close the door to your bedroom, the only thing on your mind isn’t how tired you are from dealing with midterms—it’s how Yuuji looked at you just moments ago, eyes gleaming with raw want, like you were a five star meal served on a silver platter. You clutch your chest as you flop onto your bed.

There’s always been an underlying tension between you and Yuuji. It used to be easier to ignore, something left tucked away in the corners of your mind, leaving you to instead settle for an easy friendship. Something that doesn’t complicate things, especially since you live together. There’s no avoiding any awkward encounters should either of you decide to take that step.

But lately, things have been coming to a boiling point. You’re not sure if it’s the stress of your final year of uni dawning upon you or if its just years of tension finally being pulled taut enough to snap—whatever it is, it has muddled your senses enough to find flirting with Yuuji fun instead of something forbidden. It has you pushing boundaries you never thought you would push with him before.

Oh, well. If there was any time for things to make some bad decisions and get a little complicated with your incredibly handsome roommate, your last year of uni might just be perfect. Screw the consequences.

“Yuu,” you moan, drunkenly stumbling into a wall of muscle.

Thankfully, that wall of muscle happens to be Itadori Yuuji. He wraps a strong arm around your waist, a hiccup bubbling from his lips as he grins down at you.

“Hey there,” Yuuji laughs. “You okay?”

“Yeeeeaaahhh,” you slur. “Are we home yet?”

“Almost there. Hang on a little bit more for me, okay?”

The night air is crisp and cooling against your balmy skin, a welcome relief after spending hours in a bar packed with sweaty bodies and bass thrumming through your veins. It’s breezy, fallen leaves rustling across the ground as the wind scatters them along the sidewalk. A particularly stronger gust has you pressing closer to Yuuji, your little top and skirt doing little to protect you against the autumnal weather.

Yuuji pauses, making sure you’re steady before he shrugs off his jacket.

“Here, put this on,” he says, gently maneuvering your arms into the warm sleeves. His cologne wraps around you in its embrace, warm and musky and tinged just a little bit with alcohol. You smile.

Megumi and Nobara have already made their separate ways home, the former grabbing an uber while Nobara hitched a ride home with Maki. You can’t help the way you giggle and stumble as Yuuji ushers you forward again. “Nobaraaa’s gonna geeet iiiiit,” you snicker, latching onto the hard muscle of Yuuji’s bicep to steady yourself. “Did you see the way Maki w’s lookin’ at her? I wish someone looked at me that way.”

Yuuji is probably about equally as blasted as you are (you went shot for shot, after all), but he manages to carry himself in a more sober manner than you. He lets you latch onto him like a koala as he guides you through the doors of your apartment building.

He’s quiet. Uncharacteristically so—he’s usually a chatterbox when drunk.

“Yuuji? Did’ya even hear me?” you push.

“I heard ya,” Yuuji hums, pulling you into the elevator with him. As the machinery moves up to your floor, it makes your stomach lurch—forcing you to grab onto Yuuji tighter and bury your face in his shoulder.

“Are we there yet?” You grumble into his arm, clutching him tight.

“Almost,” he replies softly. You think you feel a gentle kiss being pressed to the crown of your head, but with the way everything is spinning, you can’t be entirely sure.

Between some time and the next, you’re finally ambling into your apartment, clutching Yuuji’s jacket tight around you. As the door clicks shut, you spin to face him—

—and end up nearly face planting, if not for the way Yuuji surges forward to catch you in his arms. “Woah there,” he mumbles. “Steady. Don’t move too fast, or you’ll fall.”

Despite his words, he has to lean against the now shut door to keep himself upright, you can feel that much. You grasp the fabric of his shirt in balled fists, pressed against the sturdy surface of his chest. You can feel the way his muscles flex and roll as he shifts with the way you’re pressed up against him.

When you look up at him, doe-eyes wide, you’re met with brown eyes glimmering with want. Lust.

“Yuu… ji?” Your lips part slightly as you suck in a breath. He inhales in sync, his hands dropping to curl around your waist. He holds you gently, like a porcelain teacup on the verge of breaking.

It's quiet. There's a dazed look in his eyes as he stares at you.

“Can I kiss you?” The question falls from his lips softly—but with the silence of the apartment, so quiet you could hear a pin drop, it’s earth shattering. His eyes drop down to your glossy lips, his tongue darting out to wet his own.

You’re not in your right mind. This is a bad idea. You know this.

You don’t care.

Pulling at the collar of his shirt, you tug him down to you, lips meeting in a clash of teeth and tongue. It’s electrifying, everything you’ve ever wanted and needed in this one moment, warmth exploding in your chest like a dying star.

Fuck. You were kissing Itadori Yuuji—and it’s everything you dreamt it would be.

He pants your name amidst kisses but it’s hard to hear with your heart roaring in your ears, a drum beating an unsteady rhythm that throws you off balance in your very core. You stumble into the shoe-rack trying to hastily drag him over to the couch. Shoes clatter to the floor as you tumble into him, a moan falling from your lips as he paws at you while your hands tangle in his hair.

“I was lookin’ at you like that, you know?” Yuuji groans as the two of you fall back onto the couch. He holds you on top of him, letting you get comfy as you straddle his lap before he continues. “You haven’t noticed?”

His voice is heavy, dragging drunkenly as you stare down at him. In this position, with Yuuji laid back on the couch, you feel like you’re towering over him—giving you some semblance of control, even though you know perfectly well that Yuuji can flip you over and take you just like that. You dip your hands under his shirt, nails gently scratching against the velvet wrapped steel planes of his abs. Pushing the fabric up, you reveal the faint happy trail that begins at his navel, disappearing teasingly under the waistband of his jeans. You bite your lip.

“Hey,”—your name falls from his lips in the form of a plea, desperate and sweet—”Look at me.”

Big hands squeezing your hips force your attention back to him. You finally listen and meet his gaze, finding that his eyes are heavily eclipsed by dilated pupils, leaving a faint ring of hazel in its wake. It’s like a dark sun, or perhaps a black hole threatening to pull you into him, consumed by everything that is Itadori Yuuji.

You think you wouldn’t mind that one bit.

“Are you sure this is okay?” He’s worried, something that makes your heart warm fondly, giving you a moment of clarity amidst the fog of lust that addles your brain. The guys you typically went home with sometimes never found it in themselves to care too much about you. But Yuuji… he’s different. He does care. Yuuji continues, a touch softer, “We’re both drunk… what if we regret it in the morning?”

You slowly reach down to cradle his face in your hands. When you speak, it’s with a bold certainty that Yuuji cannot argue with: “I know I won’t regret it.”

Yuuji nods his head. With that anxiety out of the way, he surges up to kiss you with renewed vigor, tugging his jacket off of you and pulling the hem of your top over your chest to reveal your tits. When he pulls back, his eyes widen slightly as he takes in the pretty lace bra you had opted to wear out tonight.

“You’re beautiful,” Yuuji says softly. A groan catches in his throat as you roll your hips down against his, delicious friction against his erection that has you mewling for more.

“Yu,” you sigh out as he unhooks your bra with clumsy fingers, pulling your shirt off as well in one go. The garments flutter to the floor, forgotten.

“I mean it—you really are.” His voice has noticeably deepened, taking on a huskier tone that makes your toes curl. “I couldn’t take my eyes off of you. I never can.”

He presses another kiss to your lips, quick and chaste, drawing a path down your jaw, the slope of your neck. He removes a hand from your waist to palm at your sensitive breast, drawing a whimper from you that has his cock twitching in his pants. “I can’t believe you’ve never noticed. Our friends tease me all the time for it, you know?” He sighs, nearly a whine, words slurring together in a lust-drunk haze as he presses a kiss to your collar. “I could never take another girl home with me because I only want you.”

Yuuji’s drunken confession sends you reeling, thighs tightening together around him as you tilt his chin up towards you. Love and adoration glimmers in your eyes as you respond gently, “I only want you, too.”

He smiles at you then, scooping you up in his arms as he rises. “Don’t wanna ruin the couch,” he murmurs, strong hands grasping at the fat of your ass as he carries you with ease. “Your room or mine?”

“Yu—” you gasp, clutching onto him for dear life, “mine, please.”

Even drunk, he moves with you with a practiced ease—as if you’ve done this your entire lives. As he lays you on your bed, he curls over you, lips pressing together messily as his hands fiddle with the hem of your skirt. There’s a brief moment where he pants, “Can I take them off, pretty? Can I?,” as he nips at your lower lip. You nod your head; immediately he’s sliding them off, leaving you in your lacy undergarments and feeling unfairly naked compared to him. You cross your arms over your chest shyly.

Yuuji smiles sweetly as he kneels, pressing a kiss to your navel.

“Don’t hide from me, baby. I wanna see you..” He trails off as he hooks his fingers under the band of your panties, eyes flicking up to yours in silent question. You can only manage to nod your head—words have entirely escaped you at this point. If you spoke, you weren’t sure what, exactly, would come out.

The way he pulls the fabric off of you is almost reverent, his eyes never leaving your body as he sets your panties to the side. His breath is hot against your skin as he presses a kiss to your inner thigh.

“Baby,” Yuuji starts, the pet name falling from his lips with ease, like something familiar, “tell me if you want me to stop, okay?”

Calloused fingertips press into the sensitive flesh of your thighs as he pushes your legs open, even going as far as hooking a leg over his shoulder as he settles between them. His breath is hot and heavy as he grows closer to your core. It’s embarrassing, and you want to press your legs together, but Yuuji doesn’t allow this. He’s firm in his place, holding your legs wide open, baring you to him.

He starts gentle. A kiss to the apex of your thighs, a gentle finger running along your sensitive, weeping slit. A shiver runs down your spine as he parts you open, eyes raptly on you.

“Don’t stare,” you whine. “It’s embarrassing.”

He murmurs a soft apology, taking one more second for himself before he dives right in: tongue lapping at you voraciously, pulling the sweetest of moans from your lips as he eats you out like a man starved. You try to press your thighs together once more but he holds you open, unyielding in his grip as his tongue dips in your slit, then draws upwards, making circles around your clit.

He’s messy in the way he eats you out. He doesn’t hold back, either: he laps at you like he’s a dehydrated man at last finding an oasis, drinking in your juices like it’s the finest of nectars. Slick covers his chin as he raises his head to look at you, half-lidded eyes meeting yours as he eases a finger into you. It slips in with ease, aided by how wet you’ve gotten on just his tongue alone.

Your back arches as he pumps his finger into you. You need more. “Yuuji,” you plead in a broken moan. “Need more—want your cock inside me, I can take it.”

His eyes widen slightly, but he’s nodding his head like an eager puppy, withdrawing his hand and rising to pull his clothes off. You whine, a soft plea of, “hurry, need you now,” that has Yuuji clumsily fumbling at the button of his jeans. He doesn’t even pull them off fully, letting the fabric pool at his ankles as he takes his dick in his hands and presses his hips to yours. His shaft presses against your messy slit, pulsing and needy.

“Fuck,” he curses, a soft whine sounding deep in his throat as his hips cant against yours. Your eyes are wide and unblinking as you take in the sight: Yuuji, desperate, grasping your legs and nearly folding you in half as his cock rests on your pelvis, your navel. He’s big. The thought of someone his size fucking into you should be scary, but you know Yuuji will take care of you—or perhaps that’s the liquor in your brain telling you that you can take it, that you need him inside of you now.

“You’re gonna feel me so deep, baby,” he mumbles, entranced by the sight. You buck your hips slightly, barely moving thanks to the hold he has on you.

“I can take it,” you repeat, your breathing growing heavier with every passing second. “I need it. Give it to me, Yuuji.” Your hands grasp at the sheets beneath you as finally, finally, he slides the tip against your slit, catching a few times against your clit (”Yuuji, stop teasing me!”) before he finally eases into you, his fat tip breaching your weeping cunt. The stretch burns, but the sensation is not an unwelcome one.

Your mouth drops open in a silent moan as Yuuji hunches over you, pressing further into your pussy. It feels like it should almost be fucking impossible how deep he reaches inside you like this.

“Baby, baby,” Yuuji whines against the shell of your ear, breath hot and wet. You can feel his chest heave against yours as he struggles to regain his bearings. “You’re so tight—don’t think I can pull out, you feel s’good…”

As he bottoms out, you think you might die like this. His cock fills you so perfectly, pulsing and twitching inside you as he forces himself to still—to give you time to adjust.

You don’t want time, though. You really will fucking die if he doesn’t move soon.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pull him down to you to messily slot your lips against his, moaning into his mouth as his hips buck into yours. “Yuuji,” you breathe out against his lips. “Fuck me.”

“Okay, baby.” He nods, pressing his sweat slick forehead to yours as he moves his hips. He starts slower, long strokes that force you to feel all of him, deep and all-consuming and overwhelming your senses with him, strong arms caging you against the bed as he fucks into you again and again and again.

Yuuji’s pace picks up, your moans a sweet melody in his ears that spurs him on, making him lose all ration in his brain—it’s evident, in the way he growls almost animalistically, hips starting to rut into yours with reckless abandon. His balls slap against your ass, accompanied by a lewd squelch with every thrust into your messy cunt.

“Yu, fuck—please,” you sob with every thrust. He angles his hips a little differently until he finds the perfect spot—that sensitive little part of your cunt that has stars exploding behind your eyelids. Once he finds it, he narrows his focus on it, bullying his cock relentlessly into your pussy until you’re sobbing.

Your nails scratch along his back, leaving angry red marks in their wake. Yuuji groans and buries his face into the crook of your neck, mouthing and biting at the sensitive flesh as his hips pound into you.

“G’nna cum, don’t stop, ohhhh god,” you gasp out as Yuuji nips at the flesh of your collar. You claw at his back, toes curling in the air when you feel him slide a hand between your slick bodies to thumb at your clit, adding to the orchestra of sensations that are driving you mad with pleasure.

“Cum for me, angel,” Yuuji urges you breathlessly, fucking you with a renewed fervor. His hips are starting to stutter, and his large hands are grasping your thighs in a bruising grip as you convulse around him. His voice alone is enough to tip you over the edge; you’re falling into him, into oblivion, orgasming so hard your vision goes dark for a moment.

A long moan of his name falling from your lips is enough to push him over with you, white hot ropes of his cum coating your pulsing heat. You feel utterly breathless, boneless, as Yuuji slowly eases your legs down. The ache is pleasant.

“Baby,” Yuuji pants softly, breaking the pleasant silence as he brushes his fingers across your forehead. “I’m still… can I..?”

Oh, god. He is still rock hard inside of you. Your pussy is still fluttering with the world-shattering orgasm he had just given you—you’re not sure if you can take more.

But Yuuji looks at you with pleading eyes, your name falling from his lips with such desperation that you’re nodding your head, opening your arms for him. He smiles down at you, and as he leans down to press a gentle kiss to your lips, his hips slowly start to rut into yours again.

You’re not sure how many rounds you go with Yuuji—the rest of the night is a blur of moans and groans, of him making you cum again and again and again, as many times as you can possibly take.

You wake up with a pounding headache and a foreign weight slung over your chest.

“Oh, fuck,” you hiss quietly to yourself, voice raspy with remnants of sleep. “How much did I drink last night?”

Blinking open bleary eyes, you squint against the light that filters into the room—your room, which doesn’t make any sense because you never bring home your one night stands. Your hand brushes against the strong arm slung over you, and that’s when you hear an all-too-familiar snore.

“Oh, fuck.” You repeat, dread creeping into your groggy voice.

That was Itadori Yuuji in bed with you. That was your fucking roommate, naked in bed with you. You’re wearing his overly large t-shirt, and there’s an ache between your thighs that explains exactly what had transpired when you returned home with him last night.

You don’t remember too much, typical of nights where you have a little too much to drink. What you can grasp—mere wisps in the back of your mind—are fleeting moments of mind-numbing pleasure, or of sweet-nothings being whispered into your ear. Whatever scraps of memory you do have are enough to make you want to scream into a pillow out of sheer embarrassment.

You feel the arm around you tighten as Yuuji pulls you into his chest and you squeak.

Oh, that’s just fucking mortifying.

“Mmh… huh?” Yuuji mumbles sleepily. He slowly blinks, eyes focusing on you after a few moments. “What are you doing in my bed..?”

Your eyes widen as you scramble to sit up, grasping at the sheets to keep your lower body covered as you do so. Your mouth opens and closes as you look for the right words to say.

Yuuji’s eyebrows furrow. He seems to have come to a realization without you having to say it out loud.

“Oh. This isn’t...” Yuuji frowns. He’s calm in a way that confuses you—why isn’t he freaking out like you are? “We got really hammered last night, huh?”

You slowly nod your head in agreement. “Do you… remember anything?”

Your attention is drawn to his lips when he bites his lower one in thought, then drifts downards when you catch the blooming hickeys on his neck in your peripherals. Oh, god, did you leave those? What were you thinking?

All too slowly, Yuuji’s eyes meet yours. The way he looks at you is almost unbearable. There’s a sinking sensation in your chest: you think he might apologize, or tell you that last night was a mistake. That he won’t let it happen again. Quickly, you blurt, “You don’t have to say it. I get it.”

Yuuji tilts his head, his train of thought forgotten. “Say what?”

“I get that you regret it.” The words start tumbling out of your mouth and there’s little you can do to stop it. “It’s okay, you won’t hurt my feelings. I know you’re too kind to just say it outright like that—“

Yuuji opens his mouth to say something, but you barrel onwards, looking down at your lap. You’re too mortified to look at him directly.

“—And I understand if you maybe want to avoid me for awhile? I know things will be awkward, so seriously, take whatever time you need—“

Your onslaught of words is cut off by Yuuji cupping your face in his hands as he leans forward to kiss you. It’s gentle, and while it only lasts for a heartbeat, to you it feels like it lasts a lifetime.

Stunned, you lift a hand to your lips, ghosting your fingers over them as you stare at him. You’re absolutely dumbfounded.

“Sorry,” Yuuji starts softly, his thumb brushing your cheek gently. “I didn’t know how else to stop you.”

You blink at him, making a noise in the back of your throat. It’s an exhale of breath, of one you didn’t even know you were holding until just now.

“I don’t regret it. And I really hope you don’t, too.” Yuuji sighs gently. When his eyes meet yours, he looks unsure, but he continues, “I meant everything I said last night. You’re beautiful, and you’re all I’ve ever wanted. Have been, for awhile now.”

“Oh,” is all you can manage. You think your heart might explode in your chest. It beats an uneven rhythm, pulsing against your ribcage as if it’s bound to break out any moment now.

“I just didn’t want to ruin our friendship, yanno? But now that, uh...” He clears his throat. “Last night happened… I might as well come out with it.”

You nod your head as his words sink in. Yuuji visibly gets more distressed with every second that passes in tense silence, so you say, “Okay. I see.”

He swallows—you know what he wants to ask: ‘Do you like me like that, too?’ but he doesn’t voice it out loud. It hangs in the air, heavy and oppressive. You carefully deliberate your next words.

“Will you take me on a date, Yuuji?” you ask bluntly.

“What?”

“I said—”

“No, no, I heard what you said.” His eyes widen slightly, stark relief visible in his irises. “Are you sure? I mean—I’d love to. Yes. I’ll take you wherever you want to go, angel. You name it.”

You smile fondly at Yuuji—you think if he had a tail, it would be wagging ferociously right about now. “First, you can get me a glass of water and some ibuprofen. Then we’ll talk about date plans, ‘kay?”

Yuuji nods his head fervently. He rises out of bed—and quickly realizes that he’s still naked. “Oh—shit, don’t look,” he stammers, lunging for his boxers that were conveniently laid out on the floor as he blushes. Once he’s got those pulled on, he turns towards you. You’ve politely averted your eyes.

“I’ll be back in a sec,” he murmurs, grabbing your attention by gently grasping your hand, pressing a kiss to your palm. “Anything else I should grab ya?”

You feel your face warm up at the affection as you shake your head. With a smile, Yuuji shuffles out of your room to go fetch your requested items.

As you sit in the quiet of your bedroom, listening to Yuuji rustle through the bathroom, you think that maybe fucking your roommate wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

please don't repost on other platforms. rbs and comments are super appreciated ♡ !!

#☆ oakie writes #jjk smut #jjk x reader #itadori yuuji x reader #itadori yuji x reader #yuji itadori x reader #yuuji itadori x reader #itadori yuji smut #yuji itadori smut #yuuji itadori smut #itadori yuuji smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #cw alcohol #dividers by cafekitsune

[lotusmi]

SUCCESS STORY!!🤎🧸

tw//mental problems, abusive family, bullying, suicide attempt, manifest/void obsession

first of all i want to thank lotus because it helped me even when i was thinking about suicide❤️‍🩹

it's been years since I learned loa and I was having problems with the manifest. althought I have known loa for 2-3 years, i constantly reacted to 3D and for such reasons I could not manifest anything for 2-3 years. and when i first learned loa i was obsessed with void. I was hurting myself to enter void. like if you don't enter void today I will kill you. i was crazy because of void. at the same time, I was staying in the family environment that dragged me to death, and I was bullied at school . i was hated by people even though i did nothing. i tried to commit suicide many times, my family wouldn't let me go to the therapist. also, no one said anything to the bullying I saw. thats why I bullied myself for years in the same way. if I told anyone I was being bullied and asked for help, they would say it was probably my problem to my face💀💀 and towards the end of 2022, i seriously couldn't stand it anymore. i was constantly reading blogs [i think there is no blog i haven't read, lmao] and the last time i couldn't stand it, i tried suicide again, but i failed. later i wrote to lotus and she gave me a lot of advice (baby ily😩❤️) and i cried more than i have ever cried that night. the problem is that while people were already ruining me, the real problem was that i was ruining myself too. after that day, in the first week, i had so many problems in my manifest journey. but until 2023, i said to myself, "i don't want to live like this anymore. i deserve the life I want.” i made a promise. and every time I felt like quitting, i remembered my promise to myself. and now i have revised my whole life, i live in dubai🤭. if you're going to ask how i did this, i started to listen to my inner voice, i almost stopped entering tumblr. i stopped affirming and wrote down the things that i was gonna revise one by one, and added them to the notes app on my phone. i made a note at the bottom that I already have these in my life. when “what if I can't manifest the life I want?” if such thoughts came to my mind, i told myself that the creation was already finished. in this process, i focused only on myself and was developing my self concept. before I went to bed at night, i was constantly imagining the life I wanted and I was staying in that state and saying I already had the life I wanted, I didn't affirm anything extra. and even those who made life difficult for me started to apologize to me. (i manifested their karma life lol) anyway I don't want to talk more about those bitches but I want to mention this. please take a break. relax. stay away from things like void, loa for a few days. I noticed that some of you are obsessed with void on this blog. but i must say void is just a method. if i manifested the life i wanted when i was only 12-13 years old, you can do it too. take a break and do what feels good to you. love yourself. loa blogs can help you up to a point. they can't spare all their days for you. start taking responsibility. find manifest methods that work well for you. love yourself. meditate. i’ve talked a lot but I would like to add that, if someone tells you that you are the cause of the circumstances you are experiencing right now, that you created the conditions in which you live, please tell them to shut their fucking mouths. no such thing. i was blaming myself again, thinking what a disgusting monster i am just because this “you create ur reality” thingy. but the truth is that creation is already over. good luck!

MY FAV SUCCESS STORY TO EXIST!!!! 😭

I literally cried when this girl texted me saying she is living her dream life, I was so pround, I am pround 💗

Backstory, she first texted me 12/15/2022

She told me everything about her circumstances, they were really bad ones, and she was 12 at time and this made my heart so broken (she revised her age) since her parents were really toxic and disgusting ( I am not going to say much about her old story).

So I told her all about the toxic home I lived and how I manifested it away too (my success, my failures).

So, time passed and 01/feb I got this text!

I literally cried because I was so happy for herrrr 💗😭😭

"How she did it?"

She focused in her inner Self being the only reality and ignored all circumstances!

"and i would love to you to add those youtubers and blogs" insta: - kriston jackson youtube: - lana blakely tumblr: - @becomingthatgirl111 — other sources abt loa: - joe dispenza, edward art"

I literally cried so much and I am so happy for you my angel, look how you did it! You were 12 and revised your whole life! 💗💗💗

And that are people out there who don't believe that it is possible to manifest things. Look at this girl 💓

You did it amazing love, I am so pround of you. You are deserving of all the best things in the world. I wish you all the fun in life. Thank you sm for sending me this, I feel so appreciated that I had helped you, but who did all of this was YOU! 💗💗💗

✉️You all, everything is possible!

#neville goddard #law of assumption #loa tumblr #loa advice #loa blog #manifesting #success story #living in the end #loatumblr #Lotuses success

[talaok]

Good afternoon honey, I was wondering if you could write dark! Joel x plus size reader where the reader is suffering with body image and that night you go out to a club and meet Joel but smut? love the blog🥰

Pairing:Joel Miller x plus size!reader

Warnings: body image problems, negative talk of reader's body and self, smut| dub-con, unprotected p in v sex, a bit of degrading, and dark! Joel

A/n: ok ok ok I've never written a plus-size reader so if this is bad just tell me, honestly, I'll delete it, it's fine (yes I'm really nervous about this, I'm scared it's disrespectful) thank you so much for the ask tho babe💗

The dress looked absolutely horrendous on you. It was too tight and too loose in all the wrong places.

Your curves looked like they were stretching the fabric so much it was gonna tear the moment you took a step, and the makeup on your face now just looked like a pathetic attempt at driving people's attention away from it.

This was a mistake, you sighed, looking at the loser staring back at you from the other side of the mirror.

I should have never agreed to this, It's so fucking stupid.

You mumbled to yourself as you unsuccessfully tried fixing the dress in any way that wouldn't make it look so incredibly ridiculous.

Maybe I can pretend I'm sick or something, 

Maybe I got a really bad headache all the sudden,

Maybe I got fucking infected, I don't know, that would be believable. I can just start making some weird ass noises and I doubt she'd still want to go out with me.

"Hey, you ready?" Kora opened the door, causing all your plans to fall apart with one single action.

"yep" you forced a smile "all ready"

"Great, let's go!"

fuck my life man.

__ __ __

"Are you serious?" you asked, actually kind of mad

"I know, I know, I'm sorry"

"you've just met him" you pointed out, frustration and annoyance lacing your tone.

"I know" she repeated "but-" she sighed, glancing back at the man "he's so hot y/n, I mean-"

you rolled your eyes "Whatever, go have fun, I'm just gonna go home"

"no don't go home, you can have fun without me," she said "Maybe with someone else..." she raised her brows suggestively and you felt one breath away from punching her.

You shot her a look.

Yeah, like anyone would want to "have fun" with me

"what?" she asked, clueless

you stared at her, the same expression in your eyes.

"you know what"

"oh my god," she moaned "again with this thing? Y/n you're hot as fuck, anyone with half a brain cell can see that"

You remained silent.

You hated the pity party of having everyone constantly lie to you about how you looked.

Just tell me the truth. I look like shit.

It's fine, I know it, you know it, the whole world fucking knows it so stop talking to me like I'm a fucking baby and tell me the truth.

I can take it. Trust me, I've been telling it to myself since I was born.

"in fact..." A small smirk tugged at her lips as her eyes focused somewhere behind you " I think somebody definitely noticed" she grinned like an idiot as she stared at someone behind you.

"shut up" you stopped her "You know he's not," you said "He's probably looking at you"

"Oh no" she shook her head, that stupid smile still tugging at her lips "No he's definitely looking at you" She waved at him and you immediately grabbed her hand, forcing it down

"stop! what are you doing!?"

"I'm helping you out" she smirked "You'll thank me later," she said with a wink, turning to walk away but not before chuckling a taunting"Have fun"

Goddamnit

You could feel the heat rushing to your cheeks as you sneakily tried to catch a glimpse of whatever Kora was talking about.

She was probably bluffing, you thought as you slowly turned, but just then, you had to think again.

A man was looking at you, no, not looking, staring.

His eyes were pointed at you like a viewfinder in a gun. 

He was sat at a table alone, an empty beer bottle clutched in one hand, and the other one relaxed on his leg.

He looked focused, like a tiger watching a gazelle.

His salt and pepper beard suggested he was older, and so did the lines across his forehead.

But most of all... his eyes were the tell.

His deep brown eyes staring back at yo-

shit

You turned away.

Fuck

I was staring at him,

You clutched your purse to leave, but a voice stopped you in your tracks.

"hi sweetheart"

He sounded exactly how you'd imagined.

You turned to him, your eyes glimmering with shame

"hi" you breathed "Sorry if I bothered you"

He chuckled "A pretty thing like you could never bother me"

he sat down "Besides," he said "I was staring at you first"

You forced a chuckle as an awkward silence fell between you.

"I saw your friend left," he said, sitting down on the stool next to you,

"yeah" You nodded "She does that a lot"

"that's too bad" he cooed "well maybe not entirely" he considered, something switching in his tone.

"What's your name sweetheart?"

"I-I'm y/n"

"y/n" he let your name roll out his mouth with ease "pretty name for a pretty lady" he commented, "I'm Joel"

"nice to meet you" you mumbled, stumbling over your own words.

Was he coming onto you? 

"the pleasure's all mine darling"

He definitely was

But, like... why?

"I'm sorry-do you- do you know my friend?"

He grinned, his white teeth showing "no,"

"she didn't like, tell you to come here or anything?"

A small laugh fled his throat "no sweetheart"

"oh" you breathed "so you came here 'cause..." you trailed off, 

" 'cause you caught my eye from the moment you entered, and when I saw your friend leave you here all alone, I couldn't not offer a bit of company"

You felt a shy smile spill from your lips

" 'got a pretty smile angel" he smirked 

"t-thank you" 

He chuckled again "Why are you so nervous sweetheart?" he asked, his hand traveling to your thigh and stopping all oxygen from getting to your lungs "Is it me? Am I so scary?" his voice got lower as he inched closer "I don't bite y'know?" he joked "not unless you want me to"

A small gasp fled your throat, making him chuckle.

"what is it, angel?"

"I-I'm sorry I'm just not- used to this"

"Now I don't believe that" he murmured "A sweet thing like you?"

"I just-"

"What?"

"nevermind"

"If you want we could go back to my place, and you can tell me all about it with a little more privacy" he suggested, "what do you say?"

Your cheeks were as red as the fire burning in his eyes.

"I-" you stuttered

"I can show you a good time angel"

"I'm sorry" you breathed, leaning away "I'm-I'm sorry I have to go to the bathroom" You stumbled over your own words, clutching your purse and rushing off the stool and through the groups of people in the club.

You didn't even realize you were bumping and hitting every person in your trajectory as all you were focused on was that damn door right in the corner.

Oh my god, what felt like the first actual breath you'd taken in ten full minutes, finally left your mouth as you entered the bathroom.

"oh my god," you mumbled to yourself, walking to the sink to look at your reflection in the mirror.

"what the fuck was that?" you sighed 

Am I dreaming? Is that it?

If that's it this is not funny brain.

I'm so confused,

This is... I mean this is just-

What the fuck is this?

He's hot. Like hot hot and I'm... You looked at yourself, and I'm me.

You took a deep breath, looking around you.

The green stalls were empty, and the music was still blaring from the other side of the door.

You could still picture him, feel him. He was so close to you, and you could feel every molecule of your being dancing as his hand remained on your leg.

God, what the fuck

I don't even know how old he is.

And just then, the door opened.

You turned the faucet on to pretend to be washing your hands, but a voice startled you.

"there you are"

Your eyes snapped open

"T-This is the women's bathroom"

Joel smirked, "you thought you could get away from me that easily?" he asked, taking a step towards you.

"I-" you took a step back, but he followed.

"I was being nice there," he said "complimented you and shit" 

Your back was to a stall and he was right before you.

"and what did you do?" he asked "you ran"

"I didn't mean to, I was j-"

"what, angel?" he mocked "You got shy?"

"well don't you worry" His hand went to your chin, tilting it up "I'll fix that right up" He took another step, imprisoning you "I'll help you out sweetheart, mh?"

Your mouth gaped open to say something, but before you could, his lips were on yours, and his hands on your back were forcing you flush against him.

His tongue moved into your mouth as he quite literally shoved you into the stall behind you, pressing you against the closed door.

"thought you could get away from me?" he growled, kissing your neck as his hands roamed on your body, one of them roughly grabbing your ass "Thought I was just gonna let you go?" he asked, now looking at you.

"oh no angel" he kissed your mouth "I have to have you" he murmured "And I will" He kissed you again, and this time, you found yourself reciprocating.

This was wrong and scary and weird, and still... countless butterflies filled your belly.

"there you go" he praised you "That's a good girl" He moved some hair out of your face " 'knew you wanted this too," he said "knew you'd be good, angel" He smirked before you felt his hands go to your waist.

"turn around for me"

With a little push from him, you did, finding your cheek flush against the door.

"god baby" his hands took in every inch of you, adoration clear in his tone "Wanted to fuck this body of yours since I first saw you" he explained, as he slowly rolled your dress up to your waist until only your panties were left to cover you.

"it's what you wanted too, isn't it," he asked, suddenly grabbing your arms to force them together behind your back "You wanted to be fucked like a little slut didn't you?" he continued as his hand pulled your panties down, the cold hitting your core "didn't you angel?" he urged, his grip tightening as he kissed your neck again.

"I-" You didn't know what to say. you were feeling too many things at once.

"Tell me you want this" he breathed, and you heard his zipper being undone.

"tell me you want this angel," he asked again, his hot breath on the skin of your neck "C'mon, I know you do"

" I do" you admitted, and you felt him smirk.

"that's right" He nodded, positioning himself at your entrance "and you're gonna get it" he promised, pushing himself into you hard.

"fuck" Your moan resembled more of a scream as you tightened your fists on your back

"What angel, can't take it?" he taunted, speeding up " 's too big for you little slut?"

"y-yes" you begged, making him chuckle "I can't take it"

"yes you can" he groaned "You're gonna take it all in this little tight pussy and you're not gonna complain about it, understand?"

"understand?" he asked again, his threatening voice spilling in your ear.

"y-yes I'm sorry"

"good girl" he praised, resuming his violent pace, as a cry fled your mouth and tears filled your eyes.

He smacked your ass and you gasped, but before you could let out a moan, his hand covered your mouth.

The door had opened, and two women had walked in.

"we gotta be quiet, angel" he whispered to your ear

"can you be quiet for me?"

"can you be a good little girl and keep that pretty mouth shut for me?

"mh-mh" you nodded, your breathing made difficult by his hand on your mouth

"atta girl," he said, still fucking you, but much slower, and to your dismay, much deeper.

He was hitting undiscovered spots inside of you, and the mix of the pain from his cock stretching you with the pleasure of each thrust was making it really hard not to moan.

"fuck" he groaned softly in your ear "You've got the tightest little pussy angel," he said "Squeezing me so good" he breathed " like it's made for me"

You whined

"Like you were made to be my little slut" he whispered "and have this little cunt abused by my cock"

Your eyes were wide shut, your orgasm approaching as he kept hitting you so fucking well.

"you coming angel?" he asked and you nodded "We're gonna come together" he purred "I'm gonna fill you up real good" his breathing was ragged "and then you're gonna get out there and dance with my come leaking down your thighs"

"you understand?"

You nodded 

"no cleaning up," he said "I want everyone to know how much of a slut you are" 

The women's voices resumed. Or maybe they never stopped. You had no idea of what was happening beside your impending orgasm.

"fuck" he groaned "Such a good fucking slut" he whispered, his head falling in the crook of your neck, as the door opened again and the women finally got out.

His hand left your mouth

"you coming angel?"

"y-yes"

"then let it all out baby"

#I hate how this turned out #also #I swear to god I get ONE comment complaining this is “rapey” I'm not gonna be responsible for my actions. IT'S IN THE WARNINGS #READ THE FUCKING WARNINGS. #plus size reader #plus sized reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller angst #dark!joel miller #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x you #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x plus size reader #joel miller x plus sized reader #joel miller tlou #joel miller the last of us #the last of us #tlou #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #dark!joel

[thottybrucewayne]

A LIST OF PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO HELL: 2024 EDITION

Every zionist, duh, but esp yall who screenshot perfectly reasonable posts and go "Um, the look at this idiot who thinks genocide is wrong" yall make my ass itch and nobody takes you seriously, MOVE. 2. The entire U.S. government but esp Joe Biden that old ass man gettin spit roasted in hell (AND NOT THE FUN KIND!) 3. DIDDY AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT PROTECTED AND DEFENDED HIM. 4. Tory Lanez whole family, his mama, his daddy, his dog? All them. 5. The nonblack people who run those Rap House Tv type blogs that are clearly trying to be shade room clones. 6. People who get all their news from the Shade Room and Whatsapp, sorry auntie, I'm sick of you tellin' me COVID can be cured by sticking cloves of garlic up my nose :/ 7. Every single one of you dirtbag leftist ass people, yall do nothing for nobody except you thousands of adoring "former nazi" fans that need to be told it's okay that they still say the n word in private. 8. N.O.R.E and every single hiphop "journalist" 9. Charlemagne Tha God and Dj Envy, they know why. 10. Everyone who made Ike and Tina jokes after Tina past away. Grow up. 11. You fanfic girlies. So many of y'all are seeing the lake of fire, But esp if you donate to ao3 or own ao3 merch. Like, that is just embarrassing. 12. It's 2024, If I see you coming up here saying shit like "Miku wroke harry potter!" or " Hello Kitty wrote Ofmed, actually" I'm sending you to hell myself. 13. Booktokers? This is yall the second year on this list, tighten the fuck up and stop being weird about strange men on the internet, now. 14. People who do LITERALLY NOTHING yet try to tell other people how to be activists. You contribute nothing to any conversation you're a part of, suck my dick from the back. 15. People who stopped masking because other people were making them feel bad. Fuck your mama not being able to see your smile, PEOPLE ARE DYING???? 16. Lana Del Ray and Taylor Swift. They know exactly what they did. 17. Every white girl on twt who tried to jump me cause I said the Barbie movie is white feminism at its finest. 18. Elon, you raggedy bitch. 19. Every single man who hit on me this year who isn't one of my friends. 20. People who don't know what transmisogyny means and make that everyone else's problem. I need yall to start reading so bad it's not even funny. 21. You "goth is a feeling" people. You gonna be "feeling" that hell fire nippin' at your ass, NEXT 22. You 35 defending fanservice of high schoolers in anime/manga all day every day...yeah, just get on down there, big fella. They waiting on you. 23. Cishet Black men on tiktok and twt who make it their life's mission to make an ass of themselves for minor ducats. You are a one-man modern-day minstrel show and you will be dealt with. 24. White Tyler The Creator fans. Y'all know what you do.

Dishonorable mentions: Shojo fans who never talk about the fucked up shit in the manga they recc you because "At least its not as misogynistic as shounen!" (yes, yes it is) Fashion tiktokkers I hate so many of you its not even funny Every person who put the image of T.D. Jakes getting his doonies beat down at a Diddy party in my mind. Like I literally never needed to think about that. My dad <3 and all my friends' dads. Patricide NOW!!!!! People who are still whining about having to boycott shut upppppp god damn. People who stare at me in public. You got a fuckin problem?????

That's a wrap! Here are the lists from last year and the year before feel free to add more in the tags <3

#thotty speaks #thotty's going to hell list 2024 #thotty rants #tw abuse mention #ask to tag

[the-himawari]

A3! Outing Event Translation - You're my first and last love. (6/11)

*Please read disclaimer on blog

---

Azami: It sure is hard to pin one down…

Misumi: Planning is hard.

Hisoka: We’re going to run out of time if we don’t decide soon.

Sakyo: If we don’t have time to prepare, then we have limited options for what we can do.

Sakuya: If it’s going to take a lot of time and effort, then that’s even more reason to decide quickly…

Masumi: …

Sakyo: Usui. Are not plannin’ on contributing today either?

Masumi: …

Sakyo: Hey.

Masumi: …Anything’s fine.

Sakyo: You opened your mouth and that’s it? Oi, do you even wanna do this?

Masumi: …

Sakyo: You didn’t say anythin’ at our meeting yesterday either. Do you really not have any ideas?

Masumi: SHUT UP! I said I don't have any, alright!

Sakuya: M-Masumi-kun!?

Misumi: Masumi, what’s wrong?

Masumi: It doesn’t matter. I’m done. …I don’t care about anything.

Sakyo: …S’cuse me? Don’t tell me that you’re sulkin’ cause we’re not going with your plan from before? So if you can’t do something for Director, then you don’t care anymore?

Masumi: —.

Azami: Hey, stop. Sakyo's makin' the mood worse.

Sakyo: …Usui.

Masumi: …

*runs out and slams the door*

Sakuya: Ah, Masumi-kun…!

Misumi: Masumi!

Sakyo: Leave him be. It’ll be better if he cools his head a bit.

Azami: You’re the one sayin’ that?

Hisoka: …You were also kind of at fault just now.

Sakyo: …

Sakuya: U-Um, well… I’ll come up with a plan for Masumi-kun in his stead…!

Azami: Don’t force yourself, Sakuya-san. No matter how I think about it, it’s impossible to continue our meeting today.

Sakuya: I-I guess so…

Hisoka: We should take a break.

Sakuya: But Masumi-kun…

Azami: Did somethin’ happen?

Sakuya: Masumi-kun hasn’t been acting like himself since this morning.

Misumi: Sakuya, let’s go look for Masumi then!

Sakuya: …Okay! Let’s search together!

Azami: *Sigh*… are we really gonna be okay?

Hisoka: …Hard to say.

Sakyo: …

-pause-

Misumi: Sakuya, was Masumi over there?

Sakuya: No. He wasn’t in his room either… I asked Tsuzuru-kun, but I heard he didn’t go back there.

Misumi: I see… Where in the world did Masumi run off to?

Sakuya: Masumi-kun…

Misumi: Here, Sakuya. I’ll give you a pretty triangle! So cheer up, okay?

Sakuya: Wow, it’s a pretty acrylic flower. Thank you, Misumi-san.

Misumi: It’s a rose petal! …Sakuya, do you have any idea what’s going on with Masumi?

Sakuya: …Actually, he looked sleepy when I went to fetch him from his room this morning. I thought he must've not gotten much sleep.

Misumi: I see…

Sakuya: I’m worried that he might have something eating away at him…

Misumi: Ah! Watch out, Sakuya!

Sakuya: Huh? Woahh! Oh… Hisoka-san!?

Hisoka: Zzz… Hm?

Misumi: Were you taking a nap since our meeting was adjourned?

Hisoka: Yeah. The mood was bad in the rehearsal hall.

Sakuya: You might catch a cold sleeping out here though. I almost accidentally stepped on you too.

Hisoka: Have you found Masumi?

Sakuya: No, not yet…

Misumi: Maybe he left the dorm?

Hisoka: … …I might have an idea where he is.

Sakuya: Wait! Really?

Hisoka: Yeah. Lend me your ear for a second.

Sakuya: Sure… huh?

Hisoka: —.

Sakuya: …I got it!

Hisoka: Talk to you again later then.

Misumi: What did Hisoka say?

Sakuya: So, you see—.

---

previous | next

#a3! #a3! translation #usui masumi #act! addict! actors! #you're my first and last love

[crescent-lockhart97]

Random First Class Trio + Zack Headcanons #3: Crack Version

Angeal:

His favorite workout song is "YMCA" by Village People.

He's definitely knocked out Wutai soldiers like this:

Somebody once mistook him as Zack's father due to similarities in their features. He didn't even try to correct them.

His sneeze is louder than the Krakatoa explosion.

Rickrolled everyone by singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley at a company gala while he was drunk. (Sephiroth and Genesis didn't speak to him for a month. 💀💀)

Makes terrible dad jokes that even Zack cannot stomach. (He's definitely done that "Hi, hungry! I'm dad!" shit with Zack. 😂😂)

Genesis:

He is a big Fergie fan and knows her songs by heart. He can also rap that part in "Fergalicious."

He did an iconic dance number to "Umbrella" with Andrea Rhodea at the Honeybee Inn like this:

He also likes Lady Gaga and blasts "Bad Romance" every time he and Sephiroth spar with each other.

He hates horror movies. He's the loudest out of the trio when watching them (he's either screaming at the characters or at the monsters/ghosts).

Aside from LOVELESS, he also quotes "Mean Girls" on the regular. (Guess who he quotes the most... 😉😉)

Totally has a blog for Shinra blinds just because (basically who's dating or fucking who, juicy stuff on important Shinra officials and staff, etc.). He once published a blind on Rufus defacing one of President Shinra's statues with a drawing of a dick. No matter how many times Shinra has gotten it shut down, Genesis somehow manages to keep on reviving it. Recently, Kunsel and some members of Red Leather have joined his team.

Sephiroth:

Can't stand spicy food. He avoids it as much as he can. Eating spicy foods will cause his eyes to water and his nose to redden like this:

(Genesis managed to snap an unfortunate photo of him dying from the spiciness of the curry and sent it to the Silver Elite fanclub with the caption, "IS THIS YOUR KING???" 🤭🤭)

Somehow, he has the most wins in UNO and Monopoly.

Catwoman is his favorite DC character; Black Cat is his favorite Marvel character. (Gee, I wonder why... 🤔🤔)

Whenever he goes outside, a horde of cats just mysteriously flock to him. Genesis and Angeal find it both amusing and creepy. (My aunt is actually like this. Wherever she goes, cats mysteriously gather around her, it's so freaky! 😭😭😭)

He can actually do the lazy eye trick, and loves to freak Genesis out with it.

He once dressed as Sadako/Samara Morgan from "The Ring" for the Halloween costume contest... and WON.

Zack:

Has sung "Jenny" by The Click Five using a shortened version of Genesis's name to annoy him. ("I'm standing still, Genny!" "Be quiet, you overgrown mutt!" "You got me on my knees, Genny!")

(This ends up with Genesis summoning Ifrit on Zack's ass 😂😂)

He and Kunsel quote Vines all the time, usually around any of the First Class Trio or Lazard just so they could revel in their confused faces.

Zack and Kunsel: *to Angeal* You are my daaaaad! You're my dad! Boogie woogie woogie!!!

Angeal:

Once, after getting drunk during the SOLDIER game night, he and the lower-class SOLDIERs thought it was a good idea to go sledding down the building stairs, so they brought mattresses from their dorms to use as makeshift sleds. Needless to say, the infirmary reached full capacity that night.

On April Fools' Day, he somehow managed to hijack Shinra's PA system and started playing "Careless Whisper" on full blast.

He's a massive Pokémon fanboy and knows the Pokémon Theme Song by heart. In fact, he has his contacts named after Pokémon: Angeal is Machamp, Sephiroth is Mewtwo, Genesis is Charizard, Tseng is Umbreon, Aerith is Jigglypuff, Cloud is Pikachu, etc.

Threw an apple at Hojo and left a shitload of Legos all over his lab for subjecting Sephiroth to a particularly painful physical test.

#angeal hewley #genesis rhapsodos #sephiroth #sephiroth crescent #ffvii #ff7 #final fantasy 7 #final fantasy vii #final fantasy 7 remake #final fantasy vii remake #ff7 remake #ffvii remake #ffviir #ff7r #crisis core #crisis core reunion #shitposting #final fantasy shitposting #final fantasy #headcanons #ff7 headcanons #ffvii headcanons #final fantasy headcanons #zack fair #kunsel #lazard deusericus #aerith gainsborough #cloud strife #tseng

[adelaidedrubman]

NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL MUSIC MONDAY 

tagged by absolutely no one and requested by fewer still, but in the spirit of kicking off the summer of hook, line, and sinker i am also taking the liberty of starting wip music monday whether anyone likes it or not. afflicting @v0idbuggy @poetikat @henbased @florbelles @unholymilf @socially-awkward-skeleton @direwombat @strangefable @derelictheretic @corvosattano @shallow-gravy @nuclearstorms @cassietrn @confidentandgood @afarcryfrommymain @vampireninjabunnies-blog @nightbloodbix @voidika @firstaidspray @megraen @roofgeese @trench-rot @strafethesesinners @blissfulalchemist @inafieldofdaisies @clicheantagonist, please feel free to drop a wip and a tune that vibes with it!

naturally i am sharing another hl&s playlist banger. pov you’re jestiny and this is what you desperately wish your ex-girlfriends’ internal monologue to be as they watch your current partner fail to bait a hook, but unfortunately probably only the last part applies:

i heard you had to drive him home after two umbrella drinks / i heard he’s got a prius ’cause he’s into being green / my buddy said he saw y’all eating that sushi stuff / baby that don’t sound like you, that don’t sound like love / sounds like it sucks he can’t even bait a hook / he can’t even skin a buck / he don’t know who jack daniels is / ain’t ever drove a truck / knows how to throw out a line / but not the kind in a field and stream book / no darling i ain’t even worried you’ll come running back / he can’t even bait a hook ... [outro] nah you’re the one that’s gonna be sorry when you’re headin’ to get tofu and he has a flat tire in his foreign car and don’t know how to change it and you’ll get your new gucci shoes wet and you’re mad and irritated, i’ve seen you irritated, i’m telling you, better him than me actually

epic blunder, this is how they actually see you and your new man. wip excerpt from hl&s c.3, tentatively titled “throw out a line” (warnings for jessie typical emotional regulation and references to stalking behavior, played for laughs but called for what it is in text):

“Ms. Woodhouse,” John held out a hand towards the brunette that was met with nothing but a scowl in return. 

He made an apologetic ‘ah’ noise and wiped the hand on his shirt, but Jessie knew it was not the fish guts Sherri was repulsed by.  “My apologies.” He bowed. “I haven’t yet had the privilege of patronizing your little store.” Jessie smiled. Patronizing was right. And Sherri deserved it. “It’s so difficult when I have my own boat ramp right in the backyard to remember to get out there to support the small business owners in the community.”  “Support?” Skylar cut in, scowling even harder than Sherri did. “When have you ever supported any business around here? You call trying to shut everyone down and take their property from ’em support?”  Huh. That’s weird  — Skylar seemed to have history with this guy. And it was bad enough he was a lawyer at all, did she fuck up and start pretending to date a fucking foreclosure attorney or something?  John waved the accusation off. “Please, I hate discussing business matters during my recreation time.” He reached into his back pocket to take out his wallet, pulling another hundred dollar bill from it. “I would love to support Can of Worms now.”  John turned to Sherri, gauchely waving the bill in front of her. “I’m afraid my lovely date and I have fished through all of our bait. But it seems you have plenty left. He nodded towards the unopened can at Sherri’s feet. “I’d like to purchase it.”  Sherri met him with a dead-eyed stare. “Store’s closed.”  John turned, looking across the water at the Can of Worms storefront. “Your hours say open until 9.”  “Well, I’m not on the clock.”  “Oh, don’t be unreasonable. I’m paying well above market rate for something I could just waste time going over and buying from you, for much cheaper, in the store.”  “No, you couldn’t,” Skylar said. “Store’s closed.”  He pointed behind him. “I see it open.”  “Store’s always closed to you.” Jestiny gave up on pretending not to notice the conversation, setting aside her beer to slam her hands down on the side of the boat. “Well, sell it to fuckin’ me, then!”  “God, Jessie,” Sherri groaned, leaning down to hold her head in her hands. “Can’t you just fucking leave us alone? Following us, harassing us while we’re trying to fish? We broke up with you. We don’t want you around.”  “Shit’s sad,” Skylar agreed. “Just stop. Don’t make us get a fuckin’ restraining order or something.”  Jestiny kicked the side of the boat, hard. “They’re called Orders of Protection, in fucking Montana!”  “You learn that from your slimebag lawyer boyfriend?” Skylar asked. Jessie frowned. That was hitting below the belt, she thought. “And did he learn it from law school, or ’cause half the fucking County wants to take one out on his creepy ass?” Sherri brought a hand over her mouth to stifle her laugh at Skylar’s joke. “They really are perfect for each other, huh?” she giggled against Skylar’s shoulder, setting her chin atop it and looking up at her adoringly.  Jessie felt flames crawl up in her belly. Of all the infuriating insults.  “Yeah, we fucking are! I finally have someone who can keep up with me behind the rod and on an intellectual fuckin’ level!” she forced herself to flash an adoring smile of her own at the man she shouted over. “And he’s got an actual sense of humor! Just look at his outfit.”  John turned to shoot Jessie a glare.  “Yeah,” Skylar laughed, turning to nudge the flyaway hairs clinging to Sherri’s dewy brown skin away with the sun speckled tip of her nose so that she could finally whisper her teasing directly into the brunette’s ear. “Looks like you and me were the only ones that didn’t think to come dressed for the circus.” 

“I fucking heard that!” 

#wip #asked to be removed/added from tag list btw #it's the summer of hl&s i'm going to go insane #Spotify

[uselesssomebody]

𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕥 - bucky barnes x reader

complete masterlist | mcu masterlist | bucky barnes masterlist

words || 𝟝𝕜

summary || in which nat and sam goad bucky and the reader into making a bet

a/n || hey guys, it’s been too long and i’m sorry about that. it’s exam season, so it’s been hard for me to focus on writing.  ➵ thank you to everyone who’s been interacting and following the blog. as much as i appreciate likes, i’d love it if you guys could reblog any works you enjoy, as it really helps with traction towards for my work.  ➵ i’m so excited to finally be writing the bet trope - full courtesy of brooklyn 99 - and i hope i did it justice ➵ finally, i hope you enjoy!

warnings || fluff

when clint passed y/n on the way to the kitchen, he was pretty sure she hissed at him. 

similarly, when sam smiled at her, muttering a good morning as he handed her a cup of coffee, he’d heard a guttural, almost-demonic groan emit from her. he’d scrambled out of the room quickly, not hoping to be on the bad side of whatever that was.

subsequently, natasha, tony, and wanda all had similar experiences with her. even rhodey, coming in between meetings with the secretary of state and the vice president, had managed to receive a non-verbal but almost more understandable show of discontent from her. though, he reasoned she was still infinitely better than secretary ross.

so, when steve walked into the kitchen - passing by her - everyone stayed nearby, watching with bated breath to see the captain’s reaction to it all. 

“hey, y/n.” in response to his greeting, she grunts. he looks at her sympathetically as he makes himself breakfast, “guess the date didn’t go well?” 

“it went horrible!” suddenly, the dots started connecting in everyone’s heads.

natasha recalled yesterday night, everyone wishing y/n luck as she exited the tower - all done up for a date. she’d been gushing about the guy for a few days beforehand, though nat remembered feeling that it was all a bit ingenuine. obviously, her concerns must have been right, she thought, as she emerged from her hiding place, ready to comfort y/n.

“who - what happened, oh, are you okay?” contrary to her cold-hearted demeanor and reputation, was the image of her now, cradling her friend’s head as she tried to console her. y/n grumbles.

“yeah, nat, i’m fine. i am, however, going to need your help with a murder.” nat sighs, pulling her hair up. 

“‘lright, what was the bastard’s name? mike? mark?”

“no! what? no, not him. and his name was marty.”

sam audibly winced from behind her.

“you went on a date with a marty?”

“shut up, sam. wait, so if it wasn’t the date why are you upset?” the loud voices from the kitchen must have carried across floors as, before y/n could answer, a voice rung out from behind them.

“what the hell’s going on here?” a very sleep-deprived looking bucky stumbled in, causing y/n to inhale sharply.

“you fucking-” she picked up the first thing that she could grab - a newspaper, unfortunately for her - and launched it in his direction, “whore!” a series of exclamations broke out through the room - poor steve looked like he was gonna have a panic attack at the language used - while bucky deflected the projectile with his metal arm. as y/n rummaged for things to continue hitting him with, and everyone else kept hiding any possible weapons, sam turned to bucky, laughing.

“you had to bust out the metal arm to defend yourself against a - a fucking newspaper!”

“shut up, man-” distracted by conversation, bucky didn’t realize that y/n had advanced on him. she would’ve pounced too, had steve not grabbed her by the waist and held her back. 

“barnes, i will - steve, let me go - i will fuck you up, barnes!” she kicked in his grip - rather pathetically. 

“okay - no, y/n, calm down, calm down,” with a hand still tentatively holding her back, he tried to calm her down as she slowly relaxed, “would one of you tell me what is going on?”

“why don’t you ask your friend, rogers?”

“yeah, rogers!” tony piped up from behind her, ready to take any opportunity to fuck with steve. the latter rolled his eyes, turning to his best friend.

“alright, then, buck, what’s going on?” bucky shrugged his shoulders.

“nothing, i swear! look, it was just a crazy coincidence - i was on a date at a restaurant, and, lo and behold - she’s there, too!” a shout of indignance from in front of him causes steve to wince.

“oh - you goddamn - that’s absolutely not what happened! i’m trying to go on this fucking date, and then he shows up with the guy’s ex!” the revelation causes gasps to ring out.

“i didn’t know!”

“bullshit!” bucky shrugged again, unsure of how else to defend himself.

“wait, sure that’s awkward, but it’s not the end of the world.” wanda speaks from behind steve, causing y/n to roll her eyes.

“it is if my date ends up leaving with his ex.” 

“oh my god.” sam’s pissing himself laughing in the corner, making a mental note to talk to rhodey about whether the compound could get a reality tv-show. y/n finally shrugs out of steve’s grasp and, once again advances on bucky. everyone waits with bated breath to see if her promise held true but, instead, she walked past him.

“i know you did it on purpose, james,” she sighs, “now if you’ll excuse me, i’m gonna go back to bed.”

the day went on as usual, but her absence weighed on everyone’s minds. she hadn’t come out for a while, and steve just knew she was taking it heavy. although he trusted his best friend, he knew that y/n wasn’t delusional. unable to take it anymore, he finds bucky in his room.

“steve? can i help you?” bucky’s organizing - at least that’s what it looks like - when steve walks in. the latter clears his throat.

“hey, buck. i - look, i gotta ask. did ya know that y/n was gonna be at that restaurant?” bucky’s shoulders slump.

“yeah, yeah i did.” steve looks at him with a half-baked shock, as he’d honestly known what his answer would be.

“alright. and did you know that girl you were taking was his ex?” bucky doesn’t answer, “buck?”

“fuck, yeah - yes. i did.”

“oh my god, buck - that’s terrible! why-”

“look, i did it for her, okay?” steve stops berating him, and bucky sighs, before continuing. “i had friday do a little digging after she mentioned the guy’s name. he’s - well, one look at his social media shows he’s obviously still in love with his ex. i was saving y/n the hassle of finding out a few months from now and being even more upset about it.” steve bit his tongue, a little embarrassed at his misguided outburst. there was a heavy silence.

“buck - you… was that the only reason why?” bucky furrows his eyebrows.

“what do you mean?”

“i mean - well, you have a record of ruining her dates.” steve was right: on many of the sparse dates that y/n had gone out with, bucky would concoct an elaborate plan to stop her from going home with them.

“it’s not my fault she online dates - that fucking ‘kindling’-”

“tinder.” steve interrupts - natasha had tried time and time again to make him set up a profile.

“- yeah, whatever. it’s not my fault she always manages to find the worst guys.” steve ponders for a second.

“oh, come on. it can’t be that bad-”

“she’s been on dates with a racist, 3 cheaters, one guy who’s profile made it seem like he was in the black market organ trade and 2 convicted criminals. 2, steve, i get you fuck up once - but she did it twice!” steve holds his hand up in surrender.

“okay, okay! i get it, alright? i’m sorry for assuming - i’ll leave you be. good night, bucky.” 

“yeah, yeah, see you steve.”

bucky knew he only did what he did because he didn’t want to see his friend get hurt. him and y/n were friends, as much as she didn’t like believing it, and he did want to make sure she was alright. well - that and her priceless reactions. he smiled at the memories of the morning, before remembering her sudden departure. he gulped, a guilt slowly creeping up on him. as he started going to bed, he made a mental note of apologizing to her the next morning.

as his head lay on his pillow, he pondered steve’s question. “was that the only reason why”? he reasoned with himself that - of course - it was the only reason he did it. though, as he closed his eyes, a nagging voice, that sounded an awful lot like sam, chided him for being a coward. for using this backward, awkward method to get her attention. it reminded him that he really did hate when she was overtly excited to go on these dates, always wondering what it’d be like if he was the one picking her up and taking her out. he could guarantee that he could make the experience a thousand times better than any of the others could.

it also helped that he wasn’t an criminal. but aren’t you? okay, that was just sam’s voice mocking him in his head. he groaned deeply, reluctantly pushing her out of his mind - as he tried to fall into a fitful sleep.

although bucky did apologize the next morning, he didn’t explain his reasoning for his actions. he always knew that - should he - their relationship might just be that much different - maybe even better. but he couldn’t. cause you’re a coward. dammit, there was the nag again.

and, thus, the natural order returned to the universe. y/n, for all the bravado of her anger, had become just as amicable as usual - to everyone. sure, bucky pissed her off, but every time he did, he’d also apologize, and they’d go back to a strange pseudo-frienship.

sam always wanted to comment on the nature of this friendship, but never actually did. he’d always be insanely confused, as the two of them could go from being at each others’ throats to very domestically enjoying sitcoms together. and he always thought that surely he couldn’t be the only person to notice the resounding sexual tension between the two of them in those moments. in fact, he was pretty sure it amplified whenever the two argued. and they weren’t subtle either - sam swore bucky would flirt with her any chance he got.

sam was, in fact, not alone in these findings, as the ever-observant natasha carried a similar sentiment whenever she noticed y/n’s lingering gazes towards the same man that nat would have to hear hours of complaints about. nat reasoned that the only way  someone could talk about a person for that long would be if they truly loved or hated them. and while y/n would swear she hated bucky, nat could tell it was actually probably the former.

and that’s probably what led to today: natasha and sam being the only two witnesses to the slow progression of an argument between bucky and y/n. it had been over something stupid - really stupid, actually. an argument about which of their favorite characters from some police sitcom - that nat didn’t care too much for - was better.

“you don’t understand, rosa’s a fucking badass!”

“yeah, but jake’s so much funnier!”

“he’s also a baby!”

“oh my god-” 

natasha had, in all honestly, zoned out. at least, until she’d muttered come from sam.

“jesus christ. honestly, just fuck already.” he hadn’t said it loudly - as the last time he’d made the proposition to bucky, he’d had to dodge a punch - but it was loud enough for nat to hear.

“tell me about it, right? it’s honestly vulgar - them just standing here and arguing.” sam chuckled, eyeing y/n as she rolled her eyes at the small, teasing smile on bucky’s face. 

“should we, you know - should we help them?” nat stilled for a moment, thoughtfully rapping her fingers across her thigh.

“i mean, i’d love to, but how should we?” sam’s smile grew, knowing exactly what his plan was.

he waited for that night. it was a rare moment where almost everyone had stayed back at the compound for dinner. although tony made it clear thay all had rooms to enjoy there, many left most weeks to stay back at their own apartments. sam was pretty sure everyone was staying because wanda and clint were cooking, and no one could neglect an offer like that. 

as they all settled down, nat and sam both made sure to let bucky and y/n sit together. had y/n noticed the small smile on nat’s face and the reason for it, she would have berated her for resorting such childish, middle school tactics. midway through, nat nodded to sam, figuring this was as good a time as any to proceed with their plan.

“hey, buck, y/n. i forgot to mention, good job on that mission in turkey.” as soon as he saw bucky’s low exhale and y/n roll her eyes, he and nat both knew they’d won.

“god, don’t even remind me.” sam was really struggling to hide his smile at y/n’s disgust.

“what are you talking about, y’all did great!” he was having far too much fun with this. 

“well, i did great. and, y’know, she did something.” the gasp of indignance from y/n left steve and tony both placing their heads in their hands. wanda and clint were both wincing, while rhodey and - surprisingly - vision looked mildly amused.

“how dare you - hey, you wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for me.”

“oh, come on, you know i had that guy under control.”

“if you consider him knocking your teeth out as ‘under control’!” before bucky could retort, steve spoke up.

“c’mon you guys, again? it was funny the first few times, but this is getting exhausting.”

“yeah, guys, steve’s right.” natasha spoke with a fake nonchalance that steve was just eating up, “you guys seriously need to learn to stop arguing.”

“how am i supposed to when it’s him!” nat smiled symapathetically at her best friend - so innocent, so naive.

“well - alright, well, let’s say the stakes are higher, then.” y/n, bucky and steve all looked confused at natasha’s statement. tony, however looked intrigued.

“stakes, eh? what’s on your mind, romanoff?”

“simple: a bet.” y/n spluttered at the answer, while bucky laughed.

“a bet? what is this, middle school?” y/n scolded, upon recovering from a cough.

“what, scared you’ll lose?” y/n wanted to now be the one to punch bucky in his perfect teeth. before they could escalate, nat continued.

“no arguments. neither of you is allowed to continue an argument.”

“continue?”

“well, we all do love the one-time, quick-witted, snide remarks. you’ll just not be able to retort - therefore continuing the argument.” y/n gritted her teeth: this sounded like a terrible idea. nat realizes she’s gotta do a bit more convincing.

“c’mon, y/n. there’s gotta be something you want from him.” the entire table looks at y/n expectantly, as she sighs.

“fine, yeah. uh, if i win, you have to stop getting involved in my dates.” bucky shrugs, maintaining his innocence from before without an affirmation of the accusation.

“and barnes?” bucky pretends to think about it, but he knows exactly what he wants. everyone else on the table knows it too. and, honestly, his intermittent flirting with her should have tipped her off, but y/n was still oblivious.

“if i win… you let me take you out.” y/n’s eyes widen.

“you wanna kill me?” the table erupts into laughs at her confusion.

“what? no! i meant on a date - jesus, y/n.” she still looked confused.

“why would you want to take me out?”

“duh, so that i can keep getting involved in your dates. can’t complain when i am the date.” y/n narrowed her eyes at bucky’s joking answer. did she want to go on a date with bucky? well, as much as she’d imagined it, she also knew that the purpose of it, knowing bucky, would be to embarrass her in some way.

“i.. i don’t-” y/n paused, before looking at the encouraging face of nat. sighing, she nodded, “alright, fuck it, sure.” everyone cheered at the affirmation, as they all excitedly thought about the fact that the compound would be that much less negative over the next few days.

it had lasted over a month. everyone had started frothing for another argument between the two - even steve missed playing the part of a disappointed father at y/n and bucky’s antics. but there were no antics to chastise. to everyone else, the pair had been borderline civil for the entire month.

but bucky and y/n were both just one bad day away from throwing the entirety of their hard work during this stupid bet away.

y/n had one too many cases of a subtle, snide remark from bucky, ones that she was so ready to retort to, but then the judging glance of either nat or sam would pop up, and the insult on her lips would switch to one of endearment.

bucky’d been very shocked the first time she’d said she loved him. sure, he knew she didn’t mean it, but it didn’t stop his heart from stilling for a half-second. he’d sent another of those remarks in her direction - asserting that his favorite movie far surpassed hers - and she made this face, one that told him she was about to tell him how incredibly, stupidly wrong he was. that was when nat had let out an inconspicuous cough, and the beratement had changed:

“i swear to god i-” she glanced at nat, sighing, before turning back to bucky - a pained smile on her face, “i love ya, barnes.” she’d left before she could’ve seen his reaction. lucky for him, as he couldn’t hide it - yet nat was still there to notice it.

but everytime he insulted her, y/n worried about what would happen on this date he wanted to take her on. so she bit her tongue - and even kept her eye-rolling to a minimum.

similarly, as much as y/n had made a career out of poking and prodding at him the past few weeks, bucky also learned to take the hits without any retorts. he thought about actually taking her out on a date that she loved - if not for the sake of the bet, then to see the look of shock on her face when she realized just how well she could really be treated. and everytime he was close to breaking, he remembered why he wanted this so badly.

the other day, he had heard music coming from the kitchen. it was faint - and he could tell he was really only picking it up because of his enhanced senses. regardless, as he walked closer, he could make out the song - an oh, so, familiar sinatra. in fact, he was pretty sure it was his favorite song.

he was ready to walk in and greet steve, but stopped in his tracks when he realized that it was, instead, y/n, making herself some breakfast. upon noticing him, she popped an earbud out. the sound increased a bit and, upon seeing bucky focus on it, she smiles.

“can you hear it?” bucky, knowing himself to be caught, shrugged.

“yeah, i - i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to-” as he rambled out an apology - the words felt funny coming out of his mouth - he’s interrupted by her tossing the earbud to him. 

he takes it, a quizzical look on his face.

“you can listen too - it’s your type of music, right?” 

she didn’t say it as an insult, and they both reverted to silence after he popped the ear bud in. she shuffled around the stove, carefully crafting her scrambled eggs, while he tampered with the coffee machine. vision had recently taught him to use it and, regardless of his initial confusion over the ai-turned-robot, he’d graciously accepted the help.

y/n swore that it was steve who got her into older music, but, somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew it was actually bucky. in fact, he’d spent an entire week blaring 40s music whenever he was with her. his initial excuses were that he was too technologically inept to figure out how to use ear buds, but he figured it out pretty quickly after y/n gave him a taste of his own medicine by blaring top 100s and her own playlists. it worked out, somehow, for the both of them - with bucky and y/n both incorporating the others’ tastes into their own.

bucky admired the wholly domestic nature of the scene he was in, before it was interrupted when she had asked for it - her earbud - back, retreating to her room with her breakfast. 

but now, regardless of just how much both of them wanted to win, they were both at their breaking points. the team, seeing all the gritted teeth and forced smiles, knew this was the calm before the storm. and, god, was that storm brewing.

it all culminated on a friday night on the fringe between autumn and winter. the power to y/n’s room had somehow gone out, leaving her without light, heat or friday on a dark, cold, and lonely night. she had found some solace swaddled in blankets on the couch in the living room.

she was on the phone with natasha, who was currently in belarus with steve - and was unwinding for a mission in the morning. as she was bemoaning her situation, bucky entered stage left. 

“damn, what’s with the cocoon?” he gestured to the heaps of blankets on her, and y/n tried so hard not to pay any attention, “no, seriously, did christmas come early? do i have to help steve bring in the tree again-?”

“barnes, shut the fuck up or i swear to god i’ll shove a christmas tree up your ass-!” a shocked gasp from natasha cut y/n off, but the damage was already done. she looked at bucky with wide, devastated eyes at her own loss, as he started laughing.

it soon turned into a guffaw, as y/n struggled to escape both her cocoon and her predicament.

“y/n?” nat’s voice rings out from behind them, “how did- you lost the bet?” finally being able to stand up, y/n brandishes her phone in her hand.

“well, that was fun, everyone!” y/n’s sarcasm was off the charts, and she could hear nat calling out for steve in the background, “i’m going into my room and - i don’t know, crying, probably?” bucky was wheezing at her reaction, and she began her trek of shame back to her room.

a week had passed since the loss, and y/n had gotten her fair share of teasing. it was also found out that others had placed their own bets on who would win. in a shocking turn of events, a true ‘et tu, brutus’ moment, steve had been one of those who had bet against bucky winning.

bucky’d told her to be ready by 4 the following saturday. he’d kept absolutely everything about the venue and activities a secret, leaving y/n to really experiment on the evening of.

after a little wanted advice from nat, and some unwanted advice from sam, she settled on a semi-casual outfit. he was waiting by the compound exit - surprisingly punctual, in an outfit that looked… serious? like he was being serious about everything. y/n narrowed her eyes as she approached him, ready for an impromptu surprise to spring out at her. instead, she was met with bucky smiling warmly, greeting her as he slowly came up to hug her.

it was the first time they’d touched so intimately but, as much as she wanted to sink into it, she knew it was probably a way to lull her into a false sense of security. nevertheless, she reciprocated. 

“alright, buck. where’re we going?” her curiosity got the better of her as they parted, having over-thought far too much about where he’d be taking her.

“s’a surprise. you’ll just have to wait and see.” his tone was playful, instead of teasing, “shall we?” bucky held his arm out to her and she, tentatively, took it.

“i’m not gonna lie to you, though, i think you’re far too well-dressed for the occasion.” she looked down at herself, confused, as her outfit was relatively casual.

“where on earth are you taking me?” before answering, he glanced around, looking at the street names.

“ah, fuck it. we’re nearly there anyways, so…” y/n waited expectantly, “y’know how you’re always gushing to the team about steve’s dog? and how you nearly got distracted in moscow a couple months ago because of a dog?” y/n did absolutely remember, as bucky’d looked ready to smack her upside the head for getting distracted during a mission, “well, nat told me that you were worried you were too busy to get your own. so…” he gestured to a building in front of them, and y/n gasped.

it was a animal rescue shelter, and y/n was ready to faint.

“are we getting a dog - ‘cause you’ve gotta be careful, barnes. that’s like the equivalence of a proposal to me.” bucky smiled, before holding his hands out.

“damn, you got me. y/n, i’ve been meaning to ask you this for a long time coming-” as he spoke he started sinking down, and y/n’s heart dropped. upon seeing her reaction, one of abject horror he laughed, straightening himself back out, “nah, i’m just fucking with you.” y/n let out a sigh of relief, before swatting at his arm.

“god, you’re such an ass!” instead of responding, he points to a sign on the window of the shelter.

“anyways, no - we’re not getting a dog. i found this place a while back, and thought you might like it. they let you interact with any dog for as long as you want - take them on walks, play with them, whatever. it encourages adoptions, and it increases donations too, i think. you said you can’t own one, so i figured this was the next best thing.” when y/n looked at bucky, she found him a bit sheepish. wrongfully so, as this was the best proposition anyone’d ever given her.

“i - i’m in love with this - oh my god.” she was a bit speechless, more giddy than anything, but her sentence left bucky much more relieved.

“really - oh, thank god, i was worried you wouldn’t like it-”

“i love it. so much.” of her own volition, she reached down to squeeze his hand, the feeling of his palm against hers oddly perfect. he smirked, and suppressed a tease when noticing the look of wonder on her face, before they decided to walk in.

“oh, and the one with the black and brown spots?”

“uno?”

“yes - god, he was so cute!” y/n had been non-stop gushing as they made their way back to the compound. most people were out so, as they walked in, they found themselves alone and reminiscent in the kitchen.

bucky’d poured the both of them a drink, smiling to himself at her adorable ramblings.

“so, i’m assuming you enjoyed it?” when he turned around to hand her glass to her, she hid the width of her smile behind it.

“yeah, it was cool.” her nonchalance was immediately called out by an eyebrow raise from bucky, so she scoffed light-heartedly, “okay, fine. it was definitely one of the best dates i’ve ever been on.” expecting him to have a smug smile on his face, she was surprised to see one of genuine relief. she took a sip, before wiping her lips as she put the glass down, “i do hate you, though.”

“what, why?”

“because now my wish to adopt a dog has grown exponentially,” bucky smiled, thanking god there was no actual problem.

“hey, there’s date number two’s planning done.” they both laughed, before the atmosphere became a it more serious.

“buck?”

“hmm?”

“i - okay, i’m gonna say something, and i’m gonna sound like a bitch, but i’m gonna say it.” bucky nodded, waiting expectantly, “when you first mentioned taking me out as your prize for winning the bet, i thought you were only gonna take me out to… i don’t know, embarrass me?” his mouth hung open at her admittance, and she placed her head in her hands, “god, that’s such a terrible thing to say, i know-” before she can continue, she’s cut off by bucky’s fingers tentatively grazing her chin. she removes her hands to see him, and immediately registers a reclusive sadness in his eyes.

“can i admit something?” she nods, confused as to what he’ll say, “i’ve wanted to take you out on a date for months. i always figured you wouldn’t be interested in it, but realized that this stupid bet would be a way for me to show you how much i do care about you - and just how i think you should be treated. i hate myself for ruining all those dates for you, but i knew that none of them cared about you - or knew how to treat you right.” he took a deep breath, “you should hate me. i’ve bothered you time and time again because i didn’t know how to talk to you properly.” there’s a rather heavy silence, as he retracts from her. she pulls him back, faced with closed, ashamed eyes.

“bucky?” he doesn’t respond, so she continues, “i would like nothing more than to go on a second date with you.” he opens his eyes in shock, and sees a small, playful smile on her face. he mirrors her.

“even after-”

“even after everything, buck. why’d you think i went on the worst dates ever - i never put too much thought into it. everytime i’d get dressed up for some other guy, i’d be distracted thinking about you.” they both laugh, before bucky’s face grows serious again.

“well, we got a lot out of this date, right?”

“tell me about it.”

“it’s also nice to know how you’re gonna react to the proposal,” he contorted his face to mimic and mock the look of horror on her own earlier that evening.

“oh, come on, you know that’s not what i meant.” 

bucky smiled at her, a little giddy at the thought of how he’d finally taken the step that made their relationship that much better.

#mcu imagine #marvel #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes oneshot #james bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes x reader #mcu #the winter soldier #sebastian stan #the bet #brooklyn nine nine

[strawberryamanita]

Alright, it was a bad idea to go into the neurosparkly tag. People are chill in the neurospicy tag, but it's just hatepost after hatepost after hatepost in the neurosparkly tag.

I was gonna keep my mouth shut, but now I'm pissed. Y'all really know how to make a person's skin crawl.

Rant below.

Listen, this reeks of one person pulling "neurosparkly" and "neurospicy" out of a very obscure conversation and going "hmm, this gives me the willies, so it looks like an acceptable target to me!", and I'm already sick of it. This gives me the exact same vibes as that one famous post about transmeds vs transtrenders -- this idea of pinning one form of self-expression against another, in the name of dunking on fellow marginalized people that are giving your demographic "a bad name". To that end, I'd like to remind y'all that the original artist of that post admitted they weren't acting right about trans people that aren't like them, and so I'm hoping we get over this and get over it soon.

Because we cannot keep doing this.

Every. Summer. Every fucking Summer, this website has to put a spotlight on a new group to punch down on. First it was just about every LGBTQIA+ group outside of cis gay men you could imagine -- lesbians, bis/pans, trans people, ace people, non-binary people, people who identify as queer (we're literally all queer, but that's another convo all together), you name it. It literally never stops, you people have to be taught over and over again that, no, this one group isn't okay to target either, that's your family too, you're not better than them for being a different flavor of weird.

Now we're doing this to neurodivergent people? Neurodivergent people. The overwhelming majority of this website. You're gonna try and clown on other neurodivergent people for, what is it, being cringe? After we just agreed that embracing cringe is a huge step towards self-acceptance and self-love? tumblr is THE cringe website. We don't do optics here, we don't clean our metaphorical rooms when guests are over.

Like what, we have to take every moment of our neurodivergent lives seriously? It's ridiculous enough that we have a "normal" model for how a brain should be, compared to all the different ways a person can develop. Are we such tragic figures that we can't take the smallest delight in calling ourself a fun little nickname? It's not self-censoring, it's not like "handicapable vs disabled", let's not treat this thing like a gust of wind on the house of cards that is our (quite necessary) camaraderie.

Are we gonna start zeroing in on specific neurodivergent conditions next? How long are we gonna play this stupid game of Who Is It Okay To Bully on this website? If you wanna look like a mature and poised and respectable lot, you can't be doing something so petty, whether it's for fun or "for the cause".

Y'know what? I support neurosparkly. I support neurospicy. My neurotype is glow-in-the-dark. It's glittery, it's color-changing, it's metallic and covered in rhinestones and smells like artificial fruits. My neurotype is crayon drawings and old kids' meal toys and bubble machines and getting bleary-eyed over Muppet songs. My brain is covered in holographic stickers and playing 8bit videogame music on loop. I am Cringemeister General. You could only wish to be as cringe as me.

Now cringe. Cringe and cope and seethe and mald. Dig up everything you can about me to attempt to punish me for disagreeing with you, and let your confirmation bias run wild. Post me on r/cringe, make a YouTube or TikTok video about me, pick me apart on a livestream, make me the poster-boy of your disgust, print out a screenshot of my blog and throw darts at it. Dance the dance of self-hatred, and then wait in the wings until you get to dance it again.

Eugh.

I'm gonna close this rant using every argument that I've seen effectively shut down these yearly attempts at putting eachother in the pillories, because I don't know if I can take another Summer of this:

If you start picking on people for using "neurosparkly" or "neurospicy", I'm assuming you're a fed. Infighting only helps the oppressors, and if we spend our energy trying to police eachother we're not going to get anything done. Kill the cringe cop in your head. There's as many ways for a person to live as are, have been, and will be people on this planet; there's a good chance you're gonna hear about some people who give you the ick, but you're gonna have to swallow that ick and respect them anyhow.

Every ounce of energy you spend rolling your eyes at people you consider beneath you can be spent chipping away at a person in power. Every minute you choose to spend tsking or turning up your nose at "weird" kids can be spent advocating for that weirdness and normalizing being fucking nice to people. You punch down or punch across because it gives you quicker, more visible results; if we're all punching up, they'll have no other option than to listen to us.

There is enough room for everybody. Even the neurospicies, even the neurosparklies.

PS: Any attempts to make fun of me or the people I talked about in this post are just straight-up gonna be ignored. I don't see why you'd want to convince me to think less of others, so trying to sway me is gonna be difficult on your part. I'm not debating anyone's rights, and I'm not gonna conserve spoons to argue with a stranger. I have Anons turned off already, so if you wanna get up in my virtual face you won't have a disguise to protect you.

Thank you for your time.

#neurospicy #neurosparkly #actually autistic #actually neurodivergent #neurodiversity #long post

[pjisskullourful]

🆄🆂🅴 🅼🅴

🎵 Ethan × reader

part 3/? [series masterpost]

NSFW🔥 literally unsafe& balls to the wall nastiness

° Ethan Torchio/female reader insert

° “I would love it if you did push me, if you pushed me into a wall or down onto the bed, or anything like how you always act when you get home from tour.” You said. “You were telling me all this shit you were gonna do to me ‘cause you missed me so bad. But I guess that was just talk. I guess I’m more excited to see you...”    [based december 2022]

wordcount:    6,348

° commissioned by certified bad bitch kat(@mistressofthecats-blog )💋 thank you for letting me get filthy with this one& finally bringing an old request to life in the most spectacularly dirty way!  [commissions get priority, there is currently 1 fic in cue, secure your own spot in my priority list here]

🎧USE ME playlist🎧

— FOUR MONTHS LATER —

For the first time in a month, you could hear sounds coming from inside your apartment as you put your key into the lock. And it made you smile - taking your good day to great.

Ethan was home.

You had been impatiently waiting for your boyfriend to get home from touring. Calling and messaging one another wasn’t good enough. The people that you spent time with in his absence (including Tatianna, who had just accompanied you to Sephora) couldn’t compare to how he made you feel.

Now the two of you would be able to do the things you had been typing back-and-forth. Potentially even more.

You could hear voices coming from the television as you got the door open. These didn’t stop, even as the door noisily swung shut behind you. You were quickly putting your shopping bags down, not paying attention to where they landed. The makeup that had gotten you so excited had lost all of its significance to you.

“Babe?” You called, heading for the lounge room.

You had been expecting to see him within seconds. You had been expecting a reunion as lustful as those you had shared in the past.

But you were on your own. You found him sitting in front of the television and you wasted no time in joining him on the sofa. You didn’t look at the screen, you only cared about having him back, so thrilled to just get to sit with him again.

It stung when this didn’t appear to be immediately reciprocated. He glanced at you for less than a second, making no moves for an embrace.

“Give me five minutes, this episode is almost over.” He said.

You could feel the physical shift of mood inside of you as you settled more into this dislike of how he was treating you. You had been having a really good day (as part of a streak, which had seen you avoiding any downward spirals since moving in with him), your energy was up, having nothing but fun with Tatianna. You had your suspicions that you were on the cusp of a hypomanic episode. The inspiration that you had gotten from so many different items in Sephora had been a little overwhelming, even as it had given you a giddy rush.

You had spent more than a week’s pay on products, something that you had never done before. You had gotten too caught up to properly notice how much time was passing. You had received, and swiftly responded to, his message telling you that they had landed safely in Rome. But you had gotten distracted by different night creams, and before you knew it, hours had slipped by.

Was that why he wasn’t giving you any kind of warm greeting? You hadn’t been there for him to arrive home and now he was sour with you? You hoped that you were reading the situation wrong.

But this wasn’t how you were expecting to feel when he got back, and you knew how negative emotions could snowball.

You shot a somewhat resentful glance at the TV, seeing an unfamiliar scene playing out in a very drab-looking world. “What are you watching?”

He kept watching the screen. “That Jeffrey Dahmer show.”

You scrunched your nose up in distaste. “Ew, why?”

“‘Cause I wanted to watch more of it.” He said. “And you being out of the house seemed like the perfect time to give it a chance. Now babe, please, just let me finish this episode, it’s at a really interesting part.”

You got up from the couch because it was obvious that you weren’t about to get the kisses you had been craving. And you didn’t want to give any of your time to that crime drama show - you had barely made it through the first episode. The pacing had left you bored, prompting you to pull the plug on what should have been a fun binge-watching session for you and your boyfriend.

You walked away from the dialogue-heavy scene, unable to understand why this TV show was more worthy of Ethan’s attention than you were right now. There was a strange twisting sensation in your stomach and a pressure on your forehead as you went back to the front door. You started to gather up the paper bags that contained your new cosmetics.

You carried the Sephora bags back into the lounge room, irritated to see the show was still going. You didn’t sit next to him this time, instead taking up the unoccupied armchair. The bags crinkled noisily as you shifted them around, trying to recall which product had gone to each bag.

“How was your flight?” You asked.

“Fine.” He said and you saw him lift the remote, increasing the television’s volume a little.

“That’s all I get?” You asked, looking at him with your eyes narrowed as one annoyed thought followed the next. You were watching for something that would justify the crankiness that was swelling up inside of you.

He turned the volume up some more before answering. “There isn’t much else to say, baby. It’s a flight, it didn’t crash and I got all of my luggage, end of story.”

“So, you just don’t want to talk to me, then?”

“Of course I wanna talk with you, but can you please let me finish watching this episode?” He asked and you looked at the television - two policemen were having a conversation in a stationary vehicle. “Please, there are literally seconds left of it.”

“Whatever.” You said with a sigh.

The shopping bag made even more noise as you reached in with both hands, pulling out the many new lipsticks you had bought. Each tube was packaged in an individual box and you got to work opening them all, pulling out the Fenty Beauty branded components.

You discarded these small boxes onto the coffee table that took up the space between Ethan and the TV. One-by-one, you tossed them, getting to see him flinch and clench his jaw in response.

Was this the only acknowledgement you were going to get from him? The television was now showing lines of white text on a black screen. Meanwhile, you were flashing through the catalogue of exciting ways the two of you had celebrated him getting home from work trips in the past.

There had been moments of powerful passion. Regardless of how much time you had spent apart, you would come back together with wild abandon, letting all of those pent-up desires spill over.

This had caused you to rearrange some of the furniture in the apartment. An expensive end-table had to be repaired after the glass top had been shattered by the two of you bumping into it with such force, as you dragged him into the apartment, sharing feverish kisses with him. The damage hadn’t halted your sex drive, but it had inspired you to relocate the table, moving it out of the entryway.

A coat stand hadn’t lasted long in this position beside the front door. It was routinely bumped into, with you and your boyfriend too horny to be aware of your surroundings. After too many times of being accidentally knocked to the ground, the flimsy stand had broken. Potted plants had been taken out of ‘risky’ zones and other things moved before they could get damaged in the carnage of your lust.

How had you been ripped from that recklessly fun routine - instead finding yourself in a scene of stillness, wherein you were waiting to be touched.

When the episode ended, he turned the television off. But he didn’t come over to you, he didn’t take advantage of the available space on your chair. He appeared tired when you looked at him, but all that you wanted to see was a man who was happy and pleased to see you. Your insecurities rushed in to fill the space left by his apparent lack of desire.

He picked up one of the empty boxes and threw it back at you. “Can I offer you a trash bag?”

“No thanks, I’d rather have a boyfriend that talks to me.” You said, you tossed the box back onto the table and quickly added another to the collection.

“I’m talking to you right now.”

“Oh wow, and how did I ever get this lucky?” You exclaimed, your words practically dripping with sarcasm. “Now I’m worthy of your attention, really? Are you sure, Ethan?”

“Please lower your voice.” He said, his tone even, while you were only finding yourself getting more heated. He wasn’t saying what you needed to hear, he wasn’t shifting the two of you into a more recognisable scenario.

“Why?” You spat out, purposefully getting louder. “Am I interrupting you from watching another dumb show that absolutely everybody stopped talking about three fucking months ago?”

His nostrils flared and you saw his shoulders stiffen as his energy clearly began to change. “There’s no need to yell.” You rolled your eyes and threw the next empty box with extra force - but cardboard didn’t lend itself to your frustrated energy. “I was just watching the last five minutes, I didn’t realise that it would annoy you so much, but I was interested and I wanted to see the ending. And, in my defence, I wouldn’t have put the show on if you had been here. But when I got home- you weren’t here. So what was I supposed to do, sit here in silence ‘til you got back?”

“Well now I am back.” You said, throwing your hands into the air. “And you haven’t touched me, kissed me, complimented me, asked me how I am.”

“I don’t know how many times that I can say it was the last five minutes, but- look, I just got off a long flight and I would really love it if you didn’t push me right now.” He said.

“Well I would love it if you did push me, if you pushed me into a wall or down onto the bed, or anything like how you always act when you get home from tour.” You said. “You were telling me all this shit you were gonna do to me ‘cause you missed me so bad. But I guess that was just talk. I guess I’m more excited to see you ‘cause it’s been longer without sex for me…”

He watched you, eyes narrowed as you got up from your seat. “What is that supposed to mean?”

Now that all of your lipsticks were unwrapped, you started to collect the boxes into your hands. “You always jump my bones the first chance you get. I’m just saying that’s not the case this time ‘cause you’ve been getting pussy while you’ve been on the road.”

“You cannot be serious right now.” He said. “And that’s why you’re in this weird mood? Because of something you’ve made up in your head? I’m gonna need you to drop this-”

“You aren’t denying it.” You loudly interrupted him.

He raised his voice a little. “There is nothing to deny. The fact that you’re accusing me of cheating on you is gonna offend me if you keep this bullshit up.”

“It’s not bullshit.” You said, giving the coffee table a shove with your foot before walking out of the room. You went into the kitchen and opened the trash can.

He wasn’t done with expressing his annoyances, coming into the room less than a second later. “You’re gonna take back what you said, right fucking now.”

You turned to face him, not getting intimidated by the truly stormy expression he currently wore. “I’m not gonna take it back, not just because you tell me to, because it seems like a pretty accurate reading of this situation.”

“Accurate to what you’ve already made up in your head.” He said, taking a step closer to you. You kept your arms folded over your chest, your biceps flexing as your irritation continued to rise along with his. “You’re forcing it to make sense, to fit the theory you’ve invented out of nothing.”

“It’s not nothing.” You said, still holding onto your conviction.

“Do you have any idea how-... you sound so fucking-... have you completely lost your mind?” He asked, his words coming out quickly, without the consideration you had grown accustomed to from him.

“Yes.” You yelled as loudly as possible. “I am crazy.” He deflated somewhat at that, his jaw unclenching and his shoulders lowering. But his softening wasn’t mutual and you were still stewing in all of your frustrations. “I thought that you knew what you signed up for.”

His voice was much quieter when he spoke next. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” He extended his hands out toward you, as he usually would when initiating a hug. “That was a really shitty thing to say, and I didn’t mean to say it-”

You shoved his arms away from you. “But you did say it.”

“I know.” He said, gently laying a hand down on your arm. “But it’s just that- I wouldn’t cheat on you, not ever.” When you didn’t immediately push him away, he took this as an invitation to ease in closer, slowly placing his arms around your shaking body. “I’m all-in on this relationship.”

You pushed your closed fist against his chest, it was a warning. “You don’t get to play Prince Charming this time around. How do I know that you haven’t cheated on me?”

His arms were loose around you, but he refused to stop holding you. “I’m telling you that I haven’t.”

You knocked both fists into his chest, your teeth bared. “I don’t believe you.”

He was rising up to meet your anger, just as he had gotten very skilled at rising up to meet and then challenge your sadness. Your emotions didn’t always make sense to him, but every time he would approach you with compassion and give you his best try. He was the lighthouse in the mad swirl of your feelings, even when the shore felt too far for you to get to.

“I didn’t cheat on you.” He said, his tone composed.

Meanwhile, you were struggling with the hurt still inside of you. It still felt very real to you, making it difficult to see him. Instead your vision was getting clouded by your insecurities - the negative thoughts swarming in faster than he could speak.

“And I’m not gonna cheat on you.” He said.

“So you’re saying that you haven’t been fucking any other bitches?” You demanded to know.

“Yes. You are the only one. I mean, fuck- you’re literally the only person I’ve been thinking about.” He said, looking into your eyes. “Even when I was jerking off, it was either when we were having phone sex or I’d be thinking about you on my own. I wasn’t watching porn for inspiration, or whatever. I was just thinking about you, about this incredible body and how fucking desperate I was to get back to you.”

You were yet to lower your voice. “I don’t know how I’m expected to believe any of that.” You saw his nostrils flare. “It’s all talk and it doesn’t prove anything to me, Ethan. ‘Cause that isn’t how you’re acting. You can say that it’s all in my head, but I’m fuckin’ sane enough to see a change that’s right in front of me.”

“So, you want me to prove it?” He asked, the look in his eyes changing slightly.

“Yes.” You exclaimed. “I would love for you to prove it. How can I know there’s desperation if I’m-”

You were cut off as he quickly and roughly grabbed you by the face, bringing you in for a kiss. Before your brain had time to properly figure out what was going on, you were feeling his tongue in your mouth. 

Immediately, as if a mental lightswitch had been flipped - you decided that you were on the same page as him. No analysing had to be done once you agreed with his course for conflict resolution. You went with him, one passionate kiss following another as you grabbed for his body.

Without breaking contact with your lips, he guided you into backing up. His momentum took you over to the closest wall, your body slamming into the surface with enough force to rattle a framed art print from its hook. The frame fell to the ground beside your feet, but the sound of the glass shattering was entirely insignificant to you as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders securely.

You launched yourself up, lifting your feet from the floor. In one swift movement, you had your legs wrapped around his waist. His hands went to your back, steadying your body on his.

He travelled away from the wall, with you clinging to him, until you were placed onto the table in the dining room. Once your ass was on the table, he cradled your face in his hands as he tilted his head, seeking a deeper kiss. As his tongue massaged the roof of your mouth, you raised your hands up to push at the hem of his black sweater.

As you moved it out of your way, your hands curled into fists around the soft material. When he started to suck on your lip, you flexed the muscles in your arms, feeling the resistance in the material at first. Then you heard it rip apart, you moaned as the garment tore. Immediately you got your hands under the ruined sweater, fingers rediscovering the gloriously defined ridges of his muscles.

His payback came straight away - his hands going to the top of your button-up shirt. You reciprocated his heated kisses, not letting the feeling of that first button literally flying off distract you from his lips. He gathered the material up in his hands, pulling roughly and tugging it apart. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pushing your tongue into his open mouth to the unique music of your plastic buttons freely hitting the table, then the floor.

With one hand, he continued to tug down, separating the front of your shirt thoroughly. His other hand went to your throat as he pulled away from you, gasping to get more air into his lungs. Your heart was fluttering as his dark eyes moved down to your torso, checking how much of your tartan-print shirt remained in his way. He continued to hold his hand at your throat as he pushed the ripped top off of your shoulders, exposing more of your flesh to him. You got to work lengthening the tear in his sweater, getting it up to the collar.

Each of you lost your shirts, eyes meeting in this rush of intensity. You were comfortable with his strong hand on your throat, licking your lips.

He yanked you in closer and you let your eyes flutter shut, anticipating a kiss from him. Instead you were feeling his hot breath at your ear as he half-whispered, half-growled something to you. “I’ll fuckin’ prove it.”

“Good.” You said as the surge of adrenaline brought a smile to your face.

This smile remained, even as he pushed you away. He pushed you down, until your back was flat on the table. The side of your head collided with a black candelabra, knocking it from its typical spot in the middle of the table. Some of the dark purple candles tumbled out of their holders and the decorative strands of crystals were shaken loose, joining the existing rubble, the other broken things that surrounded you.

But he wasn’t treating your body as if it were broken too. There had been times during your relationship when his actions had made you feel like there was a fragile: handle with care sticker plastered across your forehead.

This moment existed independent from that, charged with an energy that took you away from any prior experiences with your boyfriend. You were ecstatic to give all of yourself to this.

His hands went to the waistband of your jeans. You tilted your pelvis as you raised your legs, wrapping them around him again. You watched him, the ache between your thighs keeping any thoughts from coming into your mind.

You weren’t sure how he did it, you had never seen it happen before - the button at the top of your fly was yanked free of the denim. You gasped, your eyes momentarily following the metal button’s trajectory away from you.

He didn’t find this so interesting, instantly progressing to tugging the zipper down. Getting these pants off of your legs wasn’t as effortless as it had been during the start of your relationship. Clothes tended to fit you better nowadays.

But he worked the black jeans off of you, tossing them aside. Then his hands were on your thighs, squeezing at the muscle definition that hadn’t existed four months ago. Utilising the gym in his apartment complex had given him more to admire on your body.

You sat up, grabbing for his belt, quickly undoing it, and then his faded black jeans. He helped you to push them down, taking a step back from you as he lowered the denim off his knees. He got one leg free, stepping back with this foot and unintentionally bumping into one of the chairs. He tried to recover and move away, attempting to reclaim his balance.

“Fuck.” He hissed as he failed, landing upon the tiled floor, his ass hitting the ground.

You didn’t hesitate from launching yourself off of the dining table to join him on the ground. He had gotten his jeans the rest of the way off, now dressed in only his red underwear. You made a grab for these, pulling them down as you got closer to him.

You placed yourself in his lap and the two of you became a tangle of limbs. You shared some heated kisses as you both got rid of the last remaining things on your bodies.

Chest-to-chest, you savoured the feeling of getting to refamiliarise yourself with his body after the longest month of your life. There was no more need to question him, his intentions or integrity. Because looking into his eyes, you could see that your feelings were mutual - there was nothing to hide between one another. He looked at you like you were the only one he wanted and it was making you forget that a world beyond this connection existed.

“I don’t have a…” He said apologetically. “Not within arms’ reach…”

You refused to get out of his lap, instead rocking your body weight into him. You kept your arms tightly wrapped around him. “I don’t give a fuck, get inside of me.”

He didn’t need any further convincing to forget about putting a condom on, letting you kiss him. His hands went to your back as you pressed your hips into his.

You could feel an eager fire building in your gut as you rubbed your wet slit against the length of his dick. You moved your hips back-and-forth, with him holding you closer. You enjoyed it all - from the wet sounds, to the way you felt his dick twitch in response. You had drained the battery life of your toys numerous times in his absence, never quite getting the result you desired. Because nothing could compare to this and the electric-like rush he could inspire into you.

“You can come inside.” You said, brushing your nose against his. “But you just better hope you don’t get me pregnant ‘cause a baby from a hate-fuck will definitely grow up to be a psychopath.”

“This is a hate-fuck?”

“We aren’t about to make love.” You clarified.

He didn’t disagree with this, nor did it turn him off. He changed how he was holding you, gripping your thigh as he securely wrapped an arm around you. He held you closer to him as he lifted his butt from the ground.

You were swung around, removed from your spot on top of his lap. He swiftly placed you down, your back flat on the tiled ground. He kneeled before you, looking at your body as if he couldn’t decide where he wanted to start with you. You kept your thighs separated, tempted to share some of your ideas with him.

But he took control of the situation, returning his hand to your throat. You felt your cunt throb, the excitement bubbling up as he held your throat with a firmer grip than before. It wasn’t enough to impede your breathing, but it was enough to successfully send you a message that he wasn’t simply resting his hand here. There was tension in his fingers, he wanted you to feel his power.

It was thrilling, and romantic in its very unique fashion, to feel his fingers perfectly contoured to your neck. He was pressing hard enough that you could feel the calluses on his hands from a lifetime of drumming.

You adored to feel this different kind of intimacy from him, because it hinted that he wasn’t going to hold back. He wasn’t going to treat you as some kind of weakling because he wasn’t seeing your disorder when he looked at you. He was seeing something he could use to get his desires out and you were keen to be this for him.

His other hand went to your hip as he leaned in closer. He pressed his hips to yours and your breathing hitched. You arched your back as his dick began to stretch your pussy open.

As he slid deeper inside, he laid on top of you and you wrapped your arms around him. He kept his hand on your neck as you began kissing him. Your kisses came in fast, they were open-mouthed and hungry as you were desperate to indulge in what you had spent too long being deprived of.

His hips snapped into you at an increasing tempo and you began to suck on his bottom lip. You couldn’t help but graze this area lightly with your teeth, which earned you harder thrusts from him, pinning you to the ground. His moans were delivered directly into your mouth as your inner-walls clenched around him.

You took each of your legs and wrapped them around his waist again, making it easier for you to push back against his thrusts. Each pump was timed perfectly, allowing you to become overwhelmed by that connection that was better sealed this way, as opposed to trying to find the right words.

You were squeezing him so tight that it was difficult to determine where you ended and he began. Your bodies worked together, picking up more speed until he had to break the kiss, needing oxygen. He rested his head in the curve of your neck, gasping for air and cursing as your hungry rhythm continued.

You lifted your body up, forcefully pushing yourself into him, with no intention of swinging back. You started to roll onto your side, manoeuvring him to go with you, until you had enough leverage that you could shove him off the top. You kept this momentum going, getting him pushed onto the floor.

As your whole body vibrated with deep need, you sat up and swung one of your legs over him. You straddled his hips and he silently watched you lean down closer. You guided his bare dick inside of you and braced yourself by planting both hands on the ground by his head.

You could set the tempo now, soon going fast enough that you were drawing more swearing out of him. He writhed beneath you, adding to the friction between your bodies. He was biting on his own lip, clearly getting lost in the ecstasy.

You sat up, your body weight going back, allowing you to sink down further on his shaft. He moaned as you rocked yourself down, finding that you could get him to your sweet spot.

The clenching of your pussy walls only intensified as the pressure inside of your body grew. You worked yourself up-and-down his shaft in consistent rocks that allowed you to put this powerful rush of adrenaline to good use. You could feel the sensitive tingles increasing, ready to carry you away from anything but this primal pleasure.

“Fuck…” He moaned, his hips unexpectedly stuttering up and interrupting your tempo as more of his body reacted to these stimulations.

He grabbed for your hips, holding you here with a firm grasp as he coaxed you into moving again. Together, you found the ideal rhythm, dedicating all of your energy to this motion because the collisions felt too good to quit.

He guided you down harder-and-harder, knocking the air out of your lungs. Your attention got caught on his arms, forgetting yourself as you admired the way those thick veins stood out beneath his tan skin. You bit into your lip, stifling a whine as you were struck with awe, until all that you could think of was your lips meeting those veins, to intimately feel the blood as it pumped through. You ran your tongue along your teeth, favouring the idea of leaving a mark.

But this impulse was overridden by the sharp increase of pressure inside of you. As he repeatedly jolted into your g-spot, you felt the earth shaking.

Your sensitive body had gotten to the point of no return and there was no holding back your cries any longer. Because you couldn’t hold anything back, squeezing your eyes shut as you surrendered to the powerful surge of pleasure.

“Oh, oh fuck…” You croaked.

“Yes.” His hands continued to grasp your hips, that unrelenting pace still being served. “Give me that squirt, baby. I want it. I need it.” His loud gasps for air accompanied his every buck. “I missed it. I need it…”

You came undone, the release sweeping through you in a moment of perfection. Your jaw fell slack, your toes curling as your cum spilled out.

“God, feels so good.” He gasped, writhing under your shaking body. “I’ve missed this so fucking much. Get me drenched, babe.”

Your nerves were ruined, but he was still working his hips, your sensitive walls spasming in response to his persistent pumps. You braced yourself by putting your hands on his shoulders, all of your energy going into trying to keep up with him.

He chased his climax with such power that you feared being bucked off. Even as you were actively being crippled by your aftershocks, you knew that stopping now was not an option. You remained at your dizzying height, the pointed tips of your manicured nails digging into his flesh as you squeezed his shoulders tighter, with more desperation. As he kept going, your cum leaked out, dripping onto his swollen balls.

“Do you have more for me?” He asked, his words coming between his ragged breaths.

“Yes.” You whimpered, going with the feeling that you were getting fucked into oblivion.

“Good. Because I’m not done with you.” He growled.

You could feel him beginning to spill inside of you, painting your sensitive pussy as his own. His last powerful jolts had you feeling so full, bringing louder moans from you.

It was all too much and you started to shatter as well. Your boyfriend had succeeded in rattling you down to the very core of your being, rewarded with his own release.

All of your energy was gone and you let your body go limp.

It was as if a demon had been exorcised out of you - clearing your vision. You sank back, moving off of him as the adrenaline fled from your body. But you weren’t feeling empty, it wasn’t an absence inside of you.

You were content. Exhausted, but you felt entirely better, now you could enjoy the sight of him. This was the relief that you had been hoping for.

You recovered slightly faster than him, sitting up and taking a look at your surroundings, while he remained laid out, with an arm resting across to cover his eyes. In the stillness of this moment, you could properly take notice of the broken and displaced items. The two of you had unintentionally created a lot of destruction. But there was more than just this physical rubble that you needed to sort through.

Gradually, you moved closer to where he was lying. You admired him anew, finding details on his body to easily distract you from sweeping up broken glass. You placed your hands down on him, enjoying the warmth of his skin without disturbing him from this recovery.

He didn’t have any response to what you were doing, until your tongue met his balls. This contact prompted a full-body twitch from him as you guided your tongue over his wet skin. He relaxed back with a sleepy sigh, letting you continue to clean him. You lapped up the combination of yours and his cum that had covered his ball-sack - this was a mess you could easily take care of. You worked slowly, taking your time to be thorough as he ran his fingers through your hair.

“No lipstick prints from any other bitches down there, hm?” He asked.

You paused, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand as you sat up. You met his eye, even though you could tell there was no malice in what he was saying, you still felt some bitter shame. “I’m sorry. It was totally uncalled for, for me to accuse you of cheating. You were right that it was shit I had just made up and I didn’t even really mean it, but it was like once I got started, I couldn’t stop myself-”

You cut yourself off, shaking your head. At the first feeling of tears building in the corners of your eyes, you stopped looking at him, instead looking at your fingernails. You studied the designs that had been there for the past three weeks as your throat began to clench.

“It was mean and stupid.” You said. “But I just got scared because I can’t lose you because I love you. I wouldn’t really blame you for leaving my crazy ass, but I-”

Suddenly, he had sat up, grabbing your arms. “What did you just say?”

You furrowed your brow. “That my ass is crazy. Obviously it’s not exclusive to just my ass, but…”

“You said that you love me. You’ve never said that before.”

“Oh. Well, yeah, I do.” You said, shifting how you were sitting because it had just hit you how uncomfortable this tiled floor was. “Even though you’re a massive creep.”

He ignored your teasing (he was used to it by now), putting his hands to your cheeks. Now you were forced to look at him, seeing the very serious look in his eyes.

“I love you too.” He said, your tears leaving you as you marvelled at how good it felt to hear that for the very first time. The seriousness of what saying that meant felt far less scary as he kissed you.

“I’ve been wanting to say that to you for ages.” He said.

“What? Why didn’t you just say it?” You snapped.

“Because you had to say it first, I was waiting for you. It was your turn because I’m the one who said we should be more than friends with benefits.”

You rolled your eyes, muttering under your breath. “My turn…”

“Hey…” There was a smile on his face as he leaned in closer. “I love you.”

You dropped your cranky-façade, throwing your arms around his shoulders. “I love you too.”

You kissed him again. His arms encircled your body as you followed him into this slow and sweet rhythm. You felt butterflies swarm your stomach as he gently sucked on your bottom lip.

Even as he pulled away, you were smiling.

“We should shower. Not ‘cause I think you fuckin’ stink, or-”

“No, you’re totally right, hun.” You quickly agreed.

You were still feeling that wonderful rush, even as the soap and water took the two of you further away from that session. This afterglow was continuing, keeping you smiling. It was the best that you had felt in a month - possibly longer.

“You’ve never fucked me like that before.” You observed.

He glanced up at you, pausing from lathering his legs with body wash. “You mean raw?”

“Aside from that. You totally lost your patience, I don’t think you’ve ever done that before. And it was fucking sexy as Hell.”

“I was kind of rough with you.” He said.

“And I was rough, too. In fact…” You moved in closer, looking at the state of his shoulders. “I might have left some marks.”

“Oh, with those talons of yours?” He asked. “I gotta say that I’m surprised you would go with the Christmas theme, you’ve said how much you hate that holiday, and-”

You interrupted him by shoving your manicurist's creations into his field of vision, inches from his face. “Excuse me, do you not see the blood splatter?” The splashes of red, glittery varnish had been applied freehand over the expertly created red and green stripes. “It’s clearly Freddy Krueger, allowing me to be anti-Christmas.”

“Oh, okay. They made his sweater red and green ‘cause there’s this whole thing, backed up by science and everything- that those two colours side-by-side are the most difficult for the human eye to perceive correctly.” He said. “So his striped sweater was literally designed to be uncomfortable to look at.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, Wes Craven is remembered as the master of horror for a reason.” He said. “I like these, they’re very sexy and very you. And I would love for you to mark me up with them.”

You grinned. “Is that so? What else do you love?”

He put his arms around you, bringing you closer. “You, I love you.”

“I love you too.” You said before your mouths met, kissing until you forgot about the running water. Kissing until you forgot about everything else.

to be continued...

»»————-　♡　————-««

If you like my writing, feel free to tip me. I am open to both commissions & requests, commissions get priority & the most input. join my taglist to keep up to date with all my debauchery

🍑  taglist: @bethanysnow -  @thegeminisgirl - @ha-la-ansia -  @icarodamiano - @paralianeyes​ - @itsmaneskinbitch   @gr8rainbowpunk -  @idyllicbutterfly -  @maneslut -   @slavicgoddess13 - @elvirabelle - @saschenkaaa - @maneskindiva  - @maneskintifoso -  @butkutee - @ursulalurks -  @crwnnjules -

#ethan torchio fic #ethan x reader #ethan torchio x reader #ethan torchio x you #maneskin x reader #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin smut #maneskin fic #manesmut #did i mention BALLS?!

[sonic-spirit]

Okay, let's fuckin gooooo!!!

I'm seeing if I can do a blog post every day to try and get myself through more of that wall of awful brain garbage that's been gumming things up inside me. I have a lot of topics I've been wanting to talk about, and stories I've been wanting to record, and, yanno. The only way out is through.

It was my first day off I haven't shared with one of my mates in awhile, so that ended up shaping how I approached the day. I started a bit of a decluttering project, since we do have a lot of stuff with no homes right now. I'm not willing to mess with my mates' stuff, but in the two years since moving all the way out here my hyper pared-down stuff has grown, and I was definitely due for some re-organizing and looking it all over for stuff I don't want or need anymore. A big part of the project today was breaking down the variety of little caches I'd developed in a few spots in the apartment and keeping like things together, especially toys and art supplies. I have some big traditional media projects I've been gearing up for, and the more ready things are to get started, the more convenient I make my setups to hit the ground running, the more likely I am to actually do them.

Talking about that stuff was supposed to help me ease into writing about one of the more emotionally charged things I've been meaning to write about, ^_^;; but if I segue into talking about Otherkin stuff from decluttering, the post's kinda gonna feel uneven to me. So, okay, let's talk about, as I have it in my notes:

The Time I Drove Across the Country 3 Times to Save My Life

I feel guilty about looking at it as anything but a tragedy, millions of people died, and who knows how many more were permanently disabled, and so many could have been okay if the people in power hadn't been so eager to throw them to the mercies of an uncaring disease. But, selfishly, COVID saved my life.

My mental health still isn't great. There are always ups and downs, and I've been under a lot of financial stress that's been causing me to spiral in a lot of other ways again. But before COVID it was so, so much worse. I wasn't still living with my abusive parents at the time, but I was working for them, and still beholden to them socially and financially. And I was...loosing resiliency. Going to cons and spending time with my friends wasn't...well, if wasn't enough to offset how the rest of it was wearing on me, dealing with my abusers, doing a job I hated and where I constantly felt like I was failing, and I was losing ground. I'd been suicidal for years and years, and I didn't think I had much fight left in me. I'd also been trying to escape, with interruptions to triage myself to keep functioning, for even longer. I was tired, and I was getting desperate.

COVID bought me more time.

Everything going into shutdown was bad. And let me be perfectly clear, shutting down was the right thing to happen, there were so, so many people who should not have died. But for the first time in ten years, I got some distance from my abusive parents. I didn't have to go into a job and see them all the time, I didn't have to go over to their house and play nice and cow-tow to them every week.

For the first time in so, so long, I got a reprieve.

It was still hard, I missed my friends, and the stress of living under the threat of a pandemic was huge. But I finally started to be able to put myself back together again. Just a little bit. And that made all the difference in the world.

And then, in the heart of all this uncertainty, one of my really, really good friends who I'd fallen out of contact with a few years prior reached out, and we reconnected. We talked, and talked, and one thing led to another, and eventually we started dating.

My parents had eroded most of the COVID protections at my job by this time, having us back working in the office, opening the office to the public, and things were quickly becoming untenable for me again. My friends, in person and long distance, did their best to help. As much as I would let them see how deeply I was struggling.

Then came the Thanksgiving trip.

I'd been very resistant to flying to Florida with my family in the Thanksgiving of a pandemic. But my mom had bartered with me. If I went on this trip, they wouldn't force me into going on the Christmas trip. -_- And how could I say no to a deal like that. Look, I didn't have many options, and again, I was beholden to them. I could only fight so hard. So, I went. And it was worse than I had even expected.

Never masking in a state with abysmal infection numbers, never taking advantage of outside seating at restaurants, eating out for every meal was bad enough. The endless refrain of Fox News and fascistic dogwhistles put me over the edge. I knew they wanted who I really was dead. But...living inside it...I was done. I needed to escape, by any means necessary. My friends were alarmed and rightly so. I redoubled my efforts to find another job as means of escape, and determined I would not do this ever again. I would give myself a deadline to get out.

When my relationship started with my mate, I changed my focus to jobs in the San Jose area. And in February, I finally had an opportunity. Two jobs wanted me to come in and interview, and I'd already blocked out a long weekend for that year's virtual FurSquared con. Instead, I loaded myself and my 16-year-old kidney diseased kitty, and everything I though I couldn't do without in case I decided to simply never come back, and drove the 3,000 miles from Illinois to California in 3 days.

It was ROUGH. I didn't give myself a very reasonable timeline to get there, and driving 10-hour or more days, going from cat-friendly hotel to cat-friendly hotel was A Lot. Giving Zi her subcutaneous fluids in hotel rooms was a wild experience. But eventually, we made it. I met up with my mate, changed clothes and ran out for an interview...^_^;; which I actually missed because I'd taken too long to get there. But spending the night with my mate and their partner, feeling safe with them...they offered to let me stay, and I tearfully admitted that I didn't want to leave.

I almost just stayed. I wanted to, badly. But I still had a house to get out from under, and I needed to go back and sell it. I went to the second interview, where neither of us impressed one another, and drove Zi and myself back, escape plan in gear.

My house was a horrifically cluttered mess when I called the realtor who'd helped me buy it and asked him to help me sell, but he was still generous when he came by to talk with me. The market was good, he told me, and places were getting sold even before they were properly listed. I signed the papers, and started getting to work on paring everything down and packing.

It quickly became clear that storage or moving things or Uhauls would be prohibitively expensive for me, easily over $1,000 for the cheapest options. Since I would be moving without a job set up, and without any form of income when I left, the only reasonable option was to only bring what I could fit in my car, and donate or sell the rest. It was hard, emotional work, and I had to make a lot of hard decisions (and a lot of use of Facebook Marketplace for the first time), but I made it happen, and by mid April, I finally left.

I had a celebratory going away party the night before leaving, where we drank and had fun, and enjoyed one another's company. And then my friends came and helped me with the last of the junk I hadn't managed to get through the next morning. They held me while I had a panic attack over telling my parents I was leaving, and helped me to be able to go.

In the end, the people who really knew me, who really loved me, saved me.

Finally, I headed out with Zi, deciding to drive...less stupid hours this time. I limited myself to 8 hour driving days, and just did a few more days. Memorably, one morning when I was trying to get us out the door and checked out, I couldn't find Zi. I searched that hotel room for my kitty for a good half hour before I finally found her--she'd somehow managed to open a drawer, climb inside, and shut herself in!

I'd expected to feel freed, relieved. I'd expected to feel a weight off myself immediately. But mostly, what I'd felt at first was numb grief. I was so tired. I was glad to be going, excited to be with people I loved. But I still felt bad. Everything they would have thought of the situation echoed in my mind, and it hurt. I knew I was right to go. I knew there was no way they'd ever stop hurting me. I knew I needed to get away. But their words, of how selfish I was, echoed inside me.

It's still hard sometimes. Abuse echoes still. But I'm so, so fucking relieved to be out. And so, so fucking grateful to be with my partners.

#sonic says #sonic sez #tw mental illness #mental health #tw suicidality #tw suicide mention #tw suicide

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

Your atheistic fedora-tipping rant is pathetic. Everyone's allowed to believe what they want - it's quite personal. It's not for some bigot with a blog to decide what's believable or what is not. Besides, all the data and knowledge suggests that there are higher forces of the universe and such. How are you different from those other bigots who preach religion, then?

LOL.

It’s notable that you didn’t bother to argue that I got anything wrong - you didn’t identify or even give any hints about which of my many posts you took issue with - just that you were bothered that I had the gall to say it out loud. This seems to be the latest tactic religionists have had to resort to. Arguing truth is a (very short) dead-end street - more like a driveway -  so instead it comes down to “shh, not so loud or the kids will hear.”

You can believe whatever nonsense you want in the privacy of your own head, but when you say it out loud, and that it's true, I get to evaluate it and show your errors. It's not my fault when it falls apart and there's no reason for me to believe you. Nobody's forcing you to read my blog, but if believers get to say what they think, so do I; to insist otherwise would make you an outright hypocrite.

What you claim is nonsensical. There is plenty we don't understand about the universe, such as the origin of how gravity and time formed, literally none of which indicates a higher being. Much less your own specific magical imaginary friend, whichever one that might be. You don't get to insert stupid fan fiction into the gaps of human knowledge just because you prefer a wrong answer now to a correct answer when we find it. Lightning, rain, disease, earthquakes... all have natural causes. Thus far, "god" as an "explanation" has a 100% losing track record. And explains nothing anyway. With all this consistent failure in mind, to bet on the same losing (dead) horse is kind of... brave. What’s the saying about insanity? Doing the same thing and expecting different results?

So, sure, I’m gonna put my bet on “natural cause: TBD” and feel no stress about doing so, and be intellectually justified in doing so.

Nice that you close with saying how bad religion is. I don't have one, though.

Notice how you don’t see “fedora-wearing” aBigfootists. Because nobody has to actually say “I don’t believe in Bigfoot” and nobody has to defend the existence and nature of the universe from lunatics who insist either that “all the data and knowledge suggests” Bigfoot is responsible (whether through ignorance or dishonesty), or that if no other explanation can be provided, Bigfoot wins by default. My vocality is directly a result of people doing exactly this with their imaginary friends, and then crying foul when challenged.

If religionists shut up about their imaginary gods, they won’t have to hear from me any more that I don’t believe them.

[ As an aside, I’ve never met a single fedora-wearing atheist, and yet so many superstitionists invoke this bizarre and completely meaningless meme. Hats? Really? The unavoidable conclusion seems to be that none of them know any more about atheism or atheists than they do about their own scripture. ]

#ask #god claims #stupidity #religion #god existence claims #god existence #religion is a mental illness

[menalez]

ur so quick to fight any radfem around here but when men are being awful. crickets.

you've got txttletale whos a guy living in the uk,claiming to speak for woc and palestinians. with the most racist and misogynist takes rn cause he equals hamas to arabs and says the rapes are made up. no callout post? no harrassing him?

you've got lesbophobic TRA creeps like white guy animentality who will reblog literally anything with the largest number of notes,just so he can promote his book. the worst trash who uses people's real suffering to virtue signal and make money. no callout,no harrassment.

i'm not a zionist. israel is far worse and has been committing horrifying war crimes for decades. i think the focus should NOT be on what hamas did 5 days ago but on the bombing of gaza and all the people being killed there NOW.

but u know,literally can't reblog any palestine support post because they are all made by these misogynistic losers.

i expected at least the radfems who are qualified to speak for palestine,like u,would try to expose these men and shut them down.

but no,i guess you only stick to harrassing other women for no reason,like you did with ms gay frogs not long ago. that went on for so long and you had so many receips. and i realized I NEVER SEEN you fighting any MAN like this. i can't take you seriously any more.

the first blog u mentioned is a blog i have blocked (who also has me blocked), the second blog u mentioned i’ve literally never heard of in my life.

i literally do not associate with men. i tend not to even bother wasting my time having discussions with them. i follow like 1 gay guy and that’s it. my blog has little to do with men beyond discussions of male violence and their misogyny and things of the sort. i’m not sure why you’re expecting me to go out of my way to *look* for men on tumblr to criticise, it’s not like my blog praises any of them. i already expect them to be awful and beyond helping.

i do associate with women and so if i see something questionable from women i practically associate with, i criticise it. i’ve criticised the “TEHMs” on here before for being misogynistic, and i’ve talked about the annoying men that orbit this side of tumblr but im not gonna go out of my way looking for random people on other sides of tumblr either. i already know the men over there are awful.

also the thing about ms frogs is such a lie lol. i criticised her politely in like 3 posts, it was one incident on one day, and that was it. it’s interesting u want me to look for random lesbophobic men outside of radblr to criticise but to overlook lesbophobia within radblr if it’s perpetuated by women (bc if i don’t overlook it, it’s actually harassment). is lesbophobia only bad if the person is someone i wouldn’t agree with overall?

#anyways feel free to check out the tag tra lesbophobia #or tra racism or tra nonsense.

[gemstone-roses]

breathe

otto octavius x reader

summary: at the moment you can't bare to be alone with your thoughts

Warnings: Hurt/comfort, mentions of intrusive thoughts, anxiety, nightmares, exhaustion, fluff.

AN: this is an 18+ blog as is all my work including this one. likes/comments/reblogs appreciated🥺

"You look exhausted", a mug of tea appears in front of you.

"Thanks very much" you said sarcastically, you are in fact, exhausted, you were just hoping he'd be to polite to point it out.

"Are you okay" he asks with a small smile and with such kindness you feel bad for being so mean.

You take a deep breath "thankyou for the tea doctor"

"Please, call me otto". He chuckles, he gives your shoulder a squeeze before settling back into his lab work.

You sigh, leaning back into your chair and rubbing your forehead, taking a sip of the tea you immediately spit it back out

"I take it your not a fan of chamomile then" you hear otto tease

"It is soap powder in a cup and no I won't explain why I know what that tastes like" you huff.

"Sorry" you smile, really though that was kind of you to bring me tea, even if it was awful tea.

"You should go home and get some rest, take the rest of the day o-

"No!" You say a little too quickly. "I just, I gotta finish these reports or Norman's gonna have my head, or my job, probably just my job definitely my job because you know how he gets and -

Otto chuckles at your words.

"Mr Osborn is on vacation"

"So?"

"He has been for 3 weeks, and he didn't leave any instruction about your reports"

"Fuck" you huffed

"really though, are you alright?" The concern in his voice almost almost made you waver.

"I'm fine, thanks otto". He gave you a smile before returning to his work.

"Your still here?". The Concern etched into ottos voice bought you out of your daydream.

"Mm" you looked up to notice everyone else had gone home, except for you.

You rubbed your head in frustration

"Come on, why don't we go sit on something more comfortable"

"You know for a man with so much money you'd think Norman would get half decent furniture" you complained.

Otto chuckled at you again

"What?"

"Oh, nothing, you make me laugh thats all" he said.

"Sit" he said, pouring out some coffee and indicating to the couch.

He sits himself next to you and hands you a mug.

" thankyou" you smile.

"So, are you going to tell me the real reason your still here at almost midnight?"

"Im just trying to get ahead with my work" mumbled looking down, you fiddled with your sleeve

Otto grabbed your hand and gave it a squeeze, causing you to look up.

"Y/n" he sighed

You gulped

"I, uhm, fuck, I just can't stop my mind from, well thinking, and i cant sleep because my stupid brain wont shut off and when i finally think im done with all these stupid thoughts im reminded of something that starts it all over again and it's just one thing after another, I keep having graphic nightmares all night long and my normal distraction methods are doing shit". You almost yelled.

You looked away from him,tears threatening to fall from your eyes.

"look at me" he tilted your head to face him.

"It's okay" he said, his eyes were so kind

The tears threatening to fall, fell and otto opened his arms for you.

You felt so safe in his arms, the kind doctor who would do anything for the people he cared about.

He held you for a while, tight, while your sobs eventually turned into sniffles

"Your coming home with me tonight"

"I am?" You sniffed

"You are" he smiled, getting up first he offers you his hand.

"Thankyou, otto". You smiled at him. Otto grabbed his coat and draped it round your shoulders.

#otto octavius x reader #doc ock x reader #spider man nwh imagine #doc ock imagine #marvel imagine #marvel hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort

[nooks-cranny-mogai]

Im trying to be more chatty on my mogai account without going overboard (cause I know it can be abit irritating if your following someone who says they are a coining blog but then it's 10 to 20 chat posts to every one coining) but I just really wanna talk about one of my experiences as someone who has "severe" autism and is high needs to the point of needing a caretaker in relation to people with more mild/moderate forms and not as high needs and their allism towards us. And this isn't " internalized allism" that's when your allistic towards yourself, being allistic towards other autistic people is just normal fucking allism.

Me, my partner and my bff( he's not on this site so I'm not vaguing any other people) and his bf all took this online test that would essentially label how high your needs were. It was based on a study of over 15,000 people, including some allistic people, so it's not official but it's pretty damn good. The numbers ranged from 0 to 230, 0 being completely allistic and 230 being severe intellectual disability. My gf scored the lowest, makes sense, she's not autistic. Then my bff's bf and then him. My gf barely cracked 70 which is pretty low to no autistic traits, my bff and his bf both ranged around 130-150, mild to moderate autism which checked out. I was 214. Exactly 16 points short of the max which was very very very surprising to me. I knew it was "bad" but not that "bad".

All in this shock, my bff took that opportunity to announce how happy he was that his numbers were low and he wasn't " too far gone". All in a group chat. Infront of me. Someone who wasn't low, had high needs, feels like a burden and an idiot for my brain fog and studdering and nonverbal episodes and loss of common knowledge and having to count on my fingers because sometimes basic math iilludes me. Me who cant maintain eye contacts and rocks on the floor during a meltdown and lost jobs because I look like a brick wall and people not taking my emotions or pain seriously, especially the fact of my chronic dibilating pain. Me, whose been called a r*tard and an " it" and "slow" and is so scared of my own strength or hurting people's feelings if I'm not clear enough or scared people will think I'm not genuine because of my tone or my volume or the fact I don't cry or grieve like they do or empathize. Me who cant live alone and get stereotyped as the scary quiet " special" coworker who you regret befriending because once I find you safe and share my interests, I don't shut up because finally someone saw the humanity in me. Someone whose surrounded on all sides as an example of badness by antivaxxers and pro-autism speaks and anti-trans and so on, whose been told Im too "messed up" to be allowed to have kids, whose been told I'm infected with demons and if I stopped being trans or bi or polyam or started being a Christian, my autism would magically go away.

He might as well told me that I'm too far gone. That I'm an idiot. Because the sad reality is that many autistic people who arnt high needs or "don't have it as bad" or don't have it to the point of tangible consistent intellectual disability look down on people like me. They think that we aren't capable of thoughts or emotions, at least to their capacity. They think that we empty shells of people and our "real" personality was scooped out by our autism. They think we can't talk to them or confront them. They think we cant speak for ourselves. I've seen it. I know it.

There are always gonna be more people with less needs than those like me and they often think they are helping us but you are no better than autism mommies. You think your one of the good low needs autistic people because your not only speaking for yourself and the community as a whole but for those of us who cant speak out. If i see someone whose publicly autistic but not intellectually disabled, my first thought is not " oh, you have an autism pin too! Fren!" It's " let's see if they're gonna talk to me like an adult or like I'm a three year old". It's " are they gonna think I'm embarrassing them if I stim Infront of others near them". It's " are they gonna say some blatantly allistic shit or call me a slur or insult me then punch me in the arm and laugh and say it's ok cause they're autistic too". It's " will they roll their eyes when I studder or lose a word or misspell a basic word or forget things I've told them ".

Cause the reality is, alot of these low needs autistic people are still autistic but you don't see those with higher needs, especially those with MUCH higher needs, as equal people. As people like you who can write a paragraph, who can recite poetry, who can contribute to society and create art and cultural change. You see us as pityable, a charity case, a burden on our caregivers and society. That's if any of you acknowledge us at all. There's nothing wrong with a quiet thank you to your god(s) for not experiencing a severe disability to the extent of others because no one wants more human suffering and we don't want you to experience our disability... Just maybe Don't say it Infront of others who arnt so lucky because I garentee, that severely autistic person can hear you, understand you and resents you for saying that and treating them as less than human.

Ok to reblog but if your not high needs and have an intellectual disability, don't clown. Or do and I'll point and laugh at you.

#clover speaks #this isnt to say low needs to moderate needs autistic people dont suffer #but im sorry #you do not have it as bad as those of us where it is a tride and true intellectual disability #and i really need yall to understand that #theres so much ableism in the nd community towards people they dont deem as capable of complex thought and emotion #i see how some of you look at people with down syndrome or cerebral palesy #you would look at me the same #and that can not be acceptable any longer

[kazewhara]

Retyping this since tumblr apparently went down when i was trying to send the ask 😭😭 but bc your cats pawing at the screen for kazuha are adorable and bc i finished an exam, have some hcs of kazuha playing w your kittens (oh and pls do tell me to shut up if im annoying bc im such a chatterbox sometimes)

So imagine the kittens leaping into the couch when kazuha is sleeping on it. His warm presence and soft snores catching the kittens’ attention. They are curious, so they start pawing at his clothes and hair, which causes kazuha to stirr up from his sleep. Upon seeing them observing him with curious gazes he greets them w a “hello there, little ones” and one of his soft smiles. The kittens interpret this as him opening his arms and welcoming them so they leap into him. One of them decides to curl up in kazuha’s lap, while the other, an intrepid one, jumps into your boyfriend’s arms and looks up at kazuha w wide eyes. Apparently fascinated by his presence, the cat starts pawing at kazuha’s cheeks, which causes him to start letting out soft giggles bc it tickles. And when you see this scene, you can’t help but melt at what a tender being your boyfriend is. So, you tell him “they seem to like you better than me, huh” and bc for once you want to be the one to fluster him, you add “they are smart” kissing his nose and taking the cat resting in his arms, joining a now flushed red kazuha and the little ones in the comfort of the couch.

I was doing one of those genshin quests where you have to go and look for neko’s escaped cats and imagined taking in a stray kitten w kazuha and writing something, but since your cat loves kazuha i’ll send this instead bc i wouldnt feel good writing it for my blog hehe as always, take care! 💕🤗

i will never tell you to shut up, i have tears in my eyes rn cause i just imagined matcha (one of the kittens that was pawing at the screen) doing that and???!,#&×*×,,#, IM GONNA DIE???

i tend to run around with kazuha and the quest where you have to find the missing kitten makes me smile bc paimon's like "oh it jumped into your arms" and the mental image of that kitten leaping right into kazuha's arms is making me sick (/pos) i love him so bad 😭💞💕💞💕💞 you take care as well!

#z box #z hcs #the kittens are actually playing rn #jumping around n all that #and i just. what if kazuha were to be here . #gonna die