Whatever fuck you Metalocalypse s/i concept sketch
She's the manager for @hotrodharts and @1980ssunflower respectively! Not too much developed about her yet, she's very open with her clients but still gets things DONE by any means necessary for them to succeed. She's become acquainted with Dethklok and has a particular soft spot for Toki, she just thinks he's the guy of all time 💖🫶💖
And nothing else certainly no OTHER manager she has some sort of weird sexual tension with
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The other thing I didn't expect and didn't realize for a while is that even things I like doing take spoons. It's not like I have ten spoons to do the dishes, go to work, and take a shower, I have ten spoons to do that OR check my tumblr, talk to my gramma on the phone, and write a few hundred words. And since I also have pretty severe executive dysfunction issues, I very quickly end up using my spoons only for the things that give me dopamine and showering once a week. Which is less than ideal trust me I fuckin know, but I'm stuck.
There are things I HAVE to give spoons to: working, driving to and from work which yes does take energy!! Grocery shopping to take lunch because eating out isn't really an option, just eating by itself takes SO MUCH energy, getting dressed, doing laundry. When it gets down to the things that I don't have to do in order to live, like folding the laundry, putting my clothes away at the end of the day, mating my socks, washing my lunch dishes, vacuuming my rug, sweeping the doggy dust bunnies off the stairs, wiping down the bathroom counter, I can't make myself do it. I don't HAVE to, even if it might make some other tasks a little easier (like getting dressed in the morning ffs), so I just don't, because otherwise I'll miss my friends and never get to play my viddy game or write down those ideas I had. I'm so TIRED. Physically and mentally and emotionally I'm just exhausted. Not in a "omg I need help right now!!" Kind of way, but like. I'm treading water just fine, not gonna drown, but fuck am I ready to get out of the pool and take a nap.
Y'know what else? Unrelated to anything above but I'm so fucking cold all the time man, I'm sick of that too. That's taking precious energy away from me because I'll literally start shivering at work and I actually cannot wear enough clothing to prevent it. I've been wearing sweatpants underneath my slacks the last few days and i still get cold. How am I supposed to fix that? I can't wear a fuckin parka to sell jewelry.
And btw, yes I did write this post from underneath a mountain of blankets on my bed with two baskets of unfolded laundry nearby, my grandmother uncalled, my jewelry bench untouched, etc etc etc etc. yeah I did this instead of any of the hundreds of other things I should do because I'm so tired I can barely keep my eyes open and I'm tired of being tired
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Y'know i think one of the reasons i find the hat so endearing is cause usually sports paraphernalia is so logo emblazoned and blunt, like to the point of being almost obnoxious. But this hat is just like here's a little cute penguin, a little friendly guy, named 'SID'. And if you get it, you get it. And if you don't its still like awww look at that little friendly penguin named sid. There's just something so charming and quirky about it ^_^ anyway i edited this old photo just for an excuse to repost it lol
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Do you ever get that weird feeling of like…. experiencing the way you interact with people from an outside perspective? And realizing how unlikable you are? And how cold and pretentious and superficial and stupid you must seem to others? And then you realize that you don’t know how to fix it, you don’t know how to act like a *normal likable person* and so you promise yourself that the next time you talk to someone, literally anyone, that you’ll think about what you’re saying and say things that make sense, that a normal human person would say? That would make people like you and want to be around you? And then you talk to your friends and you say something stupid and you realize that you forgot your promise?
And then you wonder how the hell anyone puts up with you?
Or is that just a me thing?
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deleted a bunch of the posts from yesterday because the paranoia finally caught up with me 🙃 but anyway we can't taste properly, we're constantly shaky and wheezy and dizzy, and the cough we've got has gotten significantly worse, and I called our GP to ask about paxlovid or similar treatment and got dismissed before I could even speak to a doctor and I really, really just want to go scream at someone but that would be a shitty thing to do.
I fucking hate that people keep going out while ill and not taking even basic precautions to avoid infecting others. I hate that we're basically at the mercy of everyone else because no matter how hard we try people still infect us and doctors just end up dismissing us. this is... what, like the 6th time we've had covid and we don't even fucking go outside.
I just want a break. I just want to be able to get on with life and get my shit together without being constantly screwed over by other people's reckless decisions and a frankly ridiculous amount of bad luck
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