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absolutebl · 2 months

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These Weeks in BL - This Is Very Late, Or Right on Time depending on where you sit on the temporal debate team

Sorry I got distracted by work. In my defense: I was paid.

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

March 2024 Wk 1 & 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube grey) ep 12 fin - Unfortunately, there was singing. But what can we do?

A soft charming warm hug of a show about crushes and mind reading and self worth, with no-fuss execution from a consummate team and an OG lead pair proving why they remain eternal and deserve to grow up. Look, here’s the thing, Cherry Magic is a great Thai BL in its own right not comparing it to any other iteration. But even when I do compare (and I've seen all the Cherries and read the manga) it still stands. This is a great show, a solid adaptation, and a pleasing take on the original yaoi. I personally like it better than the Japanese live action, but I think that’s because I just really like Thai BL and I LOVE TayNew. I doubted them for this and I shouldn’t have. They did a great job, as did the sides. I will say all the kissing was both present and better than any other iteration. As it should be. Definitely one for the rewatch rotation. 9/10

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 1 of 8 (10?) - Damn it, I love it. And I don't want to. It’s more classic BL than I thought it would be, and far less Only Friends or Playboyy. (Thank fuck.) We got a big cast and a lot of tropes going down out the gate, including SMITTEN popular hot guy versus nerd with secret identity. (Incidentally, Khem did drop into rude / informal when arguing with his Aunt and defending his ma. Bratty boy.) The leads have good chemistry (First always does), and everyone is very pretty. The main boy reminds me of J-Min's role (and look) in Love Class 2. I am entertained. (And faintly wonder why this isn't a MosBank vehicle.)

To Be Continued (Thai C3 Thailand grey) eps 1-3 of 8- High school sweethearts who had a bad break up reunite a decade later when both of them have full time jobs (celebrity & doctor). Dr Ji is a familiar face (hi Dream it's been a LONG time) and everyone is way too old for high school, but I guess I prefer this to child actors?

I'm enjoying it, actually, the cast may be older but they're solid as a result and the chemistry is on point for a pulp. Whether our celebrity is on the DL or cheating or something else remains to be seen but he sure is smitten. The way he LOOKS at Ji = hawt.

Frankly? Celebrity/doctor is a good pairing and this is a solid Thai BL. I hope we have a nice angsty reason for the break-up and we're not in another Promise situation. I like the sides too. Carry on, little show, I'm disposed to be pleased with you.

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) eps 5-6 of 12 - I am enjoying it, actually. It’s incredibly silly. But I don’t really mind. STOP SINGING.

1000 Years Old eps 3-4 of 12 - I love that these kids basically adopted a vampire pet. And one of them accidentally got a vampire boyfriend. This suddenly turned from a PNR into a family drama about domestic gays opening a food stall and I'm not mad about it. Nothing makes sense and I don't care because... rainbow umbrella!

A Secretly Love (Thai WeTV grey) eps 1 of 10 - I don’t love it. I make no bones about the fact that a pining uke rarely works for me, especially if he’s younger (cute supportive besties not withstanding), the power dynamic isn’t good. I always like Kimmon, he’s a stiff actor but v pretty. (I shallow af.) Still it’s time he started acting his age… literally. Having to watch ads again as well… for this? Ooof. I'm not sure I'm strong enough.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Perfect Propose (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 6 fin - It was very cute. I liked that there was uke instigated kisses. However I have some reservations on this one, much as I enjoyed it.

Adapted from Mayo Tsurakame’s manga, production team included Tadaaki Horai (My Love Mix-Up!) and Takeshi Miyamoto (Old Fashion Cupcake). Essentially Perfect Propose was about finding hope in a person when all other hope is gone. This show focuses on apathy, and perforce is somewhat apathetic and un-engaging especially as the pacing was off (and with only 6 episodes? now) However, this is countered by great visuals, good archetypes, and a clean story of childhood sweethearts reuniting after loosing their way in life. I landed on 8/10 mostly for a demanding younger seme and some great kisses.

Unknown (Taiwan Tues Youku YouTube) eps 2-3 of 11 - Oh it’s great. I love it. I’m still worried by how gritty and "Taiwanese short-esk" it feels, but wow does this hit all my favorite taboo tropes and buttons. I also adore the little found fam, they the cutest gay older bros ever. The younger one who wants so bad to grow up and take care of the older one and pushes himself because into self sacrifice that’s the only model of love he has. ARGH. BOYS. Why so much pain, just smooch already! Sheesh. It's on YouTube for some of us, here's the schedule.

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) eps 6-7 of 10 - They remain questionably cute, and that is probably going to be my ultimate review of this show. Awe cameo! (Hi babies, hope the ghosts are leaving you alone.) The irony does not escape me that the person in the relationship with the most emotional acumen is, in fact, the robot and not the human. I'm sure that's meant to be deep.

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 6 - A tortured second chance romance featuring a reported and a successful celebrity(?) academic. The kid actors look nothing like their adult counterparts, but they do look much younger. So, okay. Ah the utter embarrassment of first love. Oh I like it a lot, so very messy Japanese emo. Sigh. Here we go again.

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) eps 8-9 of 10 - They are a cute couple. They both trying so hard and so confused and awkward and polite in trying to understand each other but TERRIBLE at communication.

My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) eps 3-4 of 8 - I don’t know how I feel about this. But I do know it’s not my thing because it’s not BL. I’ll finish it because it’s short but… meh.

It's done, ready to binge, but I have no time

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master (Vietnam YouTube) - I will try when I have a window of time.

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - A Burmese BL? @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will watch eventually.

It's airing but...

Dead Friend Forever (Thai iQIYI) - finished it's run and I won't be watching it. It's horror with BL elements and the ending, well, let's just say that's a "no thank you" from me.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… no. I'm not watching this. I dislike this franchise.

Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - dropped it at ep 4.

Takumi-kun (2023) movie version AKA Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari no Hajimari no Asa released on FOD 3/5/2024. The original project was a 6 ep series. Having seen all the previous iterations and read the (terrible) yaoi I admit to being intrigued. If anyone finds eng subbed please let me know with a link in comments or in a DM? For those intersted in this show, probably the world's first true BL franchise I chat all about it here.

Gossip

James Supamongkon has withdrawn from the series Love Upon A Time and the NetJames pair is no more. Net Siraphop will continue with the historical BL project alongside a new partner. Can I interest you in Tod Techit... almost as pretty, legs for days...

The Complete Chronology of the Assault Case Against GMMTV Actor Win Pawin

I'm merely directing your attention to these articles, I do not wish for discussion of this content on this blog. Please don't ask for further info, I don't know the answer, follow the link that's why it's there.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Still Coming

3/21 Two Worlds (Thai IQIYI) 10 eps - announced here. One of those "he's dead Jim so time travel" thingames staring MaxNat. I'm over them but Asia flipping loves this trope and I do adore MaxNat. Phupha (Gun) and Khram (Nat) love each other but Phupha is murdered. Then Khram is pulled to a parallel world where, 12 years ago, Khram and Tai (Max) were in love. However, Khram was killed by Thai’s dad. Now Tai finds alter-Khram apparently alive. But then there is ALSO an alter-Phupha (played by Gun Thanawat who is Khom the repressed butler bodyguard from Unforgotten Night).

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

How flipping adorable is this vampire with his big gay umbrella? SUCH A DORK and we got more vampire dorks coming.

Thailand has found its vampire line and it's awkward and geeky and quite cheerful. 'Bout what we expected, to be fair. It's a good look for them.

And vampires.

In other news...

That's your random moment of thirst, Lim Jimin shirtless AKA my Just B bias (I mean, I could talk about how good his extensions are and how I love a husky voice in Kpop but really, just LOOK at him). I'm very very very shallow, remember? Full vid is here.

Why am I mentioning Lim Jimin (aside from the obvious)? If Just B doesn't break soon, I could some of them transitioning to BL. Jimin in particular would be a win for us, obvs.

Also, can we talk about Bain (my bias wrecker) KILLING it on Build Up? I had no idea he was that good. Anygay, this has been your Kpop end note.

Seriously tho, is ANYONE else watching Build-Up?

(Last week - well, 2 weeks ago)

Streaming services are listed how I'm (usually watching) which is with a USA based IP

The tag bragade: @doorajar

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will. Easy peesy.

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mostlysignssomeportents · 6 months

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Podcasting "Microincentives and Enshittification"

Tomorrow (Oct 25) at 10hPT/18hUK, I'm livestreaming an event called "Seizing the Means of Computation" for the Edinburgh Futures Institute.

This week on my podcast, I read my recent Medium column, "Microincentives and Enshittification," about the way that monopoly drives mediocrity, with Google's declining quality as Exhibit A:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/28/microincentives-and-enshittification/

It's not your imagination: Google used to be better – in every way. Search used to be better, sure, but Google used to be better as a company. It treated its workers better (for example, not laying off 12,000 workers months after a stock buyback that would have paid their salaries for the next 27 years). It had its users' backs in policy fights – standing up for Net Neutrality and the right to use encryption to keep your private data private. Even when the company made ghastly mistakes, it repented of them and reversed them, like the time it pulled out of China after it learned that Chinese state hackers had broken into Gmail in order to discover which dissidents to round up and imprison.

None of this is to say that Google used to be perfect, or even, most of the time, good. Just that things got worse. To understand why, we have to think about how decisions get made in large organizations, or, more to the point, how arguments get resolved in these organizations.

We give Google a lot of shit for its "Don't Be Evil" motto, but it's worth thinking through what that meant for the organization's outcomes over the years. Through most of Google's history, the tech labor market was incredibly tight, and skilled engineers and other technical people had a lot of choice as to where they worked. "Don't Be Evil" motivated some – many – of those workers to take a job at Google, rather than one of its rivals.

Within Google, that meant that decisions that could colorably be accused of being "evil" would face some internal pushback. Imagine a product design meeting where one faction proposes something that is bad for users, but good for the company's bottom line. Think of another faction that says, "But if we do that, we'll be 'evil.'"

I think it's safe to assume that in any high-stakes version of this argument, the profit side will prevail over the don't be evil side. Money talks and bullshit walks. But what if there were also monetary costs to being evil? Like, what if Google has to worry about users or business customers defecting to a rival? Or what if there's a credible reason to worry that a regulator will fine Google, or Congress will slap around some executives at a televised hearing?

That lets the no-evil side field a more robust counterargument: "Doing that would be evil, and we'll lose money, or face a whopping fine, or suffer reputational harms." Even if these downsides are potentially smaller than the upsides, they still help the no-evil side win the argument. That's doubly true if the downsides could depress the company's share-price, because Googlers themselves are disproportionately likely to hold Google stock, since tech companies are able to get a discount on their wage-bills by paying employees in abundant stock they print for free, rather than the scarce dollars that only come through hard graft.

When the share-price is on the line, the counterargument goes, "That would be evil, we will lose money, and you will personally be much poorer as a result." Again, this isn't dispositive – it won't win every argument – but it is influential. A counterargument that braids together ideology, institutional imperatives, and personal material consequences is pretty robust.

Which is where monopoly comes in. When companies grow to dominate their industries, they are less subject to all forms of discipline. Monopolists don't have to worry about losing disgusted employees, because they exert so much gravity on the labor market that they find it easy to replace them.

They don't have to worry about losing customers, because they have eliminated credible alternatives. They don't have to worry about losing users, because rivals steer clear of their core business out of fear of being bigfooted through exclusive distribution deals, predatory pricing, etc. Investors have a name for the parts of the industry dominated by Big Tech: they call it "the kill zone" and they won't back companies seeking to enter it.

When companies dominate their industries, they find it easier to capture their regulators and outspend public prosecutors who hope to hold them to account. When they lose regulatory fights, they can fund endless appeals. If they lose those appeals, they can still afford the fines, especially if they can use an army of lawyers to make sure that the fine is less than the profit realized through the bad conduct. A fine is a price.

In other words, the more dominant a company is, the harder it is for the good people within the company to win arguments about unethical and harmful proposals, and the worse the company gets. The internal culture of the company changes, and its products and services decline, but meaningful alternatives remain scarce or nonexistent.

Back to Google. Google owns more than 90% of the search market. Google can't grow by adding more Search users. The 10% of non-Google searchers are extremely familiar with Google's actions. To switch to a rival search engine, they have had to take many affirmative, technically complex steps to override the defaults in their devices and tools. It's not like an ad extolling the virtues of Google Search will bring in new customers.

Having saturated the search market, Google can only increase its Search revenues by shifting value from searchers or web publishers to itself – that is, the only path to Search growth is enshittification. They have to make things worse for end users or business customers in order to make things better for themselves:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/21/potemkin-ai/#hey-guys

This means that each executive in the Search division is forever seeking out ways to shift value to Google and away from searchers and/or publishers. When they propose a enshittificatory tactic, Google's market dominance makes it easy for them to win arguments with their teammates: "this may make you feel ashamed for making our product worse, but it will not make me poorer, it will not make the company poorer, and it won't chase off business customers or end users, therefore, we're gonna do it. Fuck your feelings."

After all, each microenshittification represents only a single Jenga block removed from the gigantic tower that is Google Search. No big deal. Some Google exec made the call to make it easier for merchants to buy space overtop searches for their rivals. That's not necessarily a bad thing: "Thinking of taking a vacation in Florida? Why not try Puerto Rico – it's a US-based Caribbean vacation without the transphobia and racism!"

But this kind of advertising also opens up lots of avenues for fraud. Scammers clone local restaurants' websites, jack up their prices by 15%, take your order, and transmit it to the real restaurant, pocketing the 15%. They get clicks by using some of that rake to buy an ad based on searches for the restaurant's name, so they show up overtop of it and rip off inattentive users:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/24/passive-income/#swiss-cheese-security

This is something Google could head off; they already verify local merchants by mailing them postcards with unique passwords that they key into a web-form. They could ban ads for websites that clone existing known merchants, but that would incur costs (engineer time) and reduce profits, both from scammers and from legit websites that trip a false positive.

The decision to sell this kind of ad, configured this way, is a direct shift of value from business customers (restaurants) and end-users (searchers) to Google. Not only that, but it's negative sum. The money Google gets from this tradeoff is less than the cost to both the restaurant (loss of goodwill from regulars who are affronted because of a sudden price rise) and searchers (who lose 15% on their dinner orders). This trade-off makes everyone except Google worse off, and it's only possible when Google is the only game in town.

It's also small potatoes. Last summer, scammers figured out how to switch out the toll-free numbers that Google displayed for every airline, redirecting people to boiler-rooms where con-artists collected their credit-card numbers and sensitive personal information (passports, etc):

https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/phone-numbers-airlines-listed-google-directed-scammers-rcna94766

Here again, we see a series of small compromises that lead to a massive harm. Google decided to show users 800 numbers rather than links to the airlines' websites, but failed to fortify the process for assigning phone numbers to prevent this absolutely foreseeable type of fraud. It's not that Google wanted to enable fraud – it's that they created the conditions for the fraud to occur and failed to devote the resources necessary to defend against it.

Each of these compromises indicates a belief among Google decision-makers that the consequences for making their product worse will be outweighed by the value the company will generate by exposing us to harm. One reason for this belief is on display in the DOJ's antitrust case against Google:

https://www.justice.gov/opa/press-release/file/1328941/download

The case accuses Google of spending tens of billions of dollars to buy out the default search position on every platform where an internet user might conceivably perform a search. The company is lighting multiple Twitters worth of dollars on fire to keep you from ever trying another search engine.

Spraying all those dollars around doesn't just keep you from discovering a better search engine – it also prevents investors from funding that search engine in the first place. Why fund a startup in the kill-zone if no one will ever discover that it exists?

https://www.theverge.com/23802382/search-engine-google-neeva-android

Of course, Google doesn't have to grow Search to grow its revenue. Hypothetically, Google could pursue new lines of business and grow that way. This is a tried-and-true strategy for tech giants: Apple figured out how to outsource its manufacturing to the Pacific Rim; Amazon created a cloud service, Microsoft figured out how to transform itself into a cloud business.

Look hard at these success stories and you discover another reason that Google – and other large companies – struggle to grow by moving into adjacent lines of business. In each case – Apple, Microsoft, Amazon – the exec who led the charge into the new line of business became the company's next CEO.

In other words: if you are an exec at a large firm and one of your rivals successfully expands the business into a new line, they become the CEO – and you don't. That ripples out within the whole org-chart: every VP who becomes an SVP, every SVP who becomes an EVP, and every EVP who becomes a president occupies a scarce spot that it worth millions of dollars to the people who lost it.

The one thing that execs reliably collaborate on is knifing their ambitious rivals in the back. They may not agree on much, but they all agree that that guy shouldn't be in charge of this lucrative new line of business.

This "curse of bigness" is why major shifts in big companies are often attended by the return of the founder – think of Gates going back to Microsoft or Brin returning to Google to oversee their AI projects. They are the only execs that other execs can't knife in the back.

This is the real "innovator's dilemma." The internal politics of large companies make Machiavelli look like an optimist.

When your company attains a certain scale, any exec's most important rival isn't the company's competitor – it's other execs at the same company. Their success is your failure, and vice-versa.

This makes the business of removing Jenga blocks from products like Search even more fraught. These quality-degrading, profit-goosing tactics aren't coordinated among the business's princelings. When you're eating your seed-corn, you do so in private. This secrecy means that it's hard for different product-degradation strategists to realize that they are removing safeguards that someone else is relying on, or that they're adding stress to a safety measure that someone else just doubled the load on.

It's not just Google, either. All of tech is undergoing a Great Enshittening, and that's due to how intertwined all these tech companies. Think of how Google shifts value from app makers to itself, with a 30% rake on every dollar spent in an app. Google is half of the mobile duopoly, with the other half owned by Apple. But they're not competitors – they're co-managers of a cartel. The single largest deal that Google or Apple does every year is the bribe Google pays Apple to be the default search for iOS and Safari – $15-20b, every year.

If Apple and Google were mobile competitors, you'd expect them to differentiate their products, but instead, they've converged – both Apple and Google charge sky-high 30% payment processing fees to app makers.

Same goes for Google/Facebook, the adtech duopoly: not only do both companies charge advertisers and publishers sky-high commissions, clawing 51 cents out of every ad dollar, but they also illegally colluded to rig the market and pay themselves more, at advertisers' and publishers' expense:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jedi_Blue

It's not just tech, either – every sector from athletic shoes to international sea-freight is concentrated into anti-competitive, value-annihilating cartels and monopolies:

https://www.openmarketsinstitute.org/learn/monopoly-by-the-numbers

As our friends on the right are forever reminding us: "incentives matter." When a company runs out of lands to conquer, the incentives all run one direction: downhill, into a pit of enshittification. Google got worse, not because the people in it are worse (or better) than they were before – but because the constraints that discipline the company and contain its worst impulses got weaker as the company got bigger.

Here's the podcast episode:

https://craphound.com/news/2023/10/23/microincentives-and-enshittification/

And here's a direct link to the MP3 (hosting courtesy of the Internet Archive; they'll host your stuff for free, forever):

https://archive.org/download/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_452/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_452_-_Microincentives_and_Enshittification.mp3

And here's my podcast's RSS feed:

http://feeds.feedburner.com/doctorow_podcast

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/28/microincentives-and-enshittification/

#pluralistic #podcasts #enshittification #google #microincentives #monopoly #incentives matter #trustbusting #the curse of bigness

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creedslove · 11 months

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DESERVE IT - PART FOUR

Javier Peña x f!reader

Summary: after the traumatic night you were doing your best to keep things to yourself, but when a co-worker begins to bother you, you make a decision that brings consequences no one imagine and now it's Javier's turn to take your side, despite the bad situation involving the two of you

Warnings: angst, hurt, mentions of smut, kind of unrequited love, sexual harassment, violence, verbal abuse like a lot of verbal abuse, physical abuse, protective Javier, this one is heavy sorry

A/N: Idk I was so invested in this chapter because reader is me (us) and I love the drama

• PART ONE

• PART TWO

• PART THREE

3.6k words

The reflection that stared back at Javier in the mirror disgusted him to no end.

He hated every single detail about it, its looks, its attitude, its job, its shitty choices.

Javier Peña hated himself.

He was a low life, he knew that and never actually hid it, but to know you now, not only knew for a fact he was one, but told him to his face made it everything worse.

He wasn't a hypocrite, he knew you were right, he was never going to try to convince you otherwise, there was no mistake, no misinterpretation in the world that could somehow lessen what he'd done to you.

He'd ghosted you, ignored you, been cold, rude, he'd complained about how well you treated him, even if that was the only good thing he had in his life. The kindness he received from you without expecting anything in return was something he should've refused but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

And he knew he should've kept to himself the moment you refused his flirting. That was what he did to the very few women who refused him, but he just couldn't resist.

The way you laughed softly and bit your lips, an adorable pink spreading on your beautiful face as you leaned closer and watched him up and down.

"If it weren't for the heartbreak I still got, I'd be under you right now" you chuckled "and then I'd be on top of you and if you really played your cards right, I'd be on my hands and knees" you burst out laughing, sipping the drink he'd paid you and looking down in embarrassment.

That was your first ever interaction outside the office and after you were bluntly honest with him, he wasn't able to let you go.

You were too good, too pretty, too funny and too damn sexy.

After that, he promised himself he wouldn't let you get hurt, but he couldn't stay away. Each time your face lit up when he said something about your nails, or how you smiled when he called you a pet name and the next thing Javier leaving small gifts on your desk.

It was stupid, he felt so dumb when you arrived at work and saw the small chocolates, or the flowers, but the moment you smiled at him and rushed to his desk to thank him, it made it all worth it.

Then you began hanging out on the weekends too, at first it was a shy restaurant recommendation, that quickly turned into a ride to the restaurant and that evolved into lunch or dinner together.

During the week, the smell of food coming from your apartment was tempting, and though Javi salivated just to picture how good it would be to have some homemade food again, he was too embarrassed to knock on your door and ask for a plate.

As if you'd read his mind you knocked on his door, offering some and that became a habit.

You were right when you rubbed on his face he enjoyed being treated like your boyfriend, he really did. That way he could be near you and daydream about how things could be if he were a different man.

He never meant to hurt you, but he began hurting you by letting you in, by not pushing you away when he had the opportunity to do so. He knew you, he knew you were past the relationship feelings a long time ago, maybe you didn't tell yourself that, but he could tell you liked him in a way it was fair to you, because he liked you just as much, though it took him some time to bring himself to admit it himself he was in love.

But nothing good ever came from that.

Even the times Javier was actually in love, it faded as quick as it started. He was a guy that had passions, but they never lasted. So he couldn't do that to you. He couldn't let you think you two could be together knowing some day he would probably wake up and see his feelings for you had changed, while you were stuck in love with someone who didn't deserve you.

He couldn't be like your ex, he hated that motherfucker with passion. Since the first time you mentioned your heartbreak, under all the amusement he felt at your words, he also felt a hint of anger. He didn't understand how a man could hurt a woman like you.

You'd never told him exactly what had happened, and he never asked. It was pretty simple to him: if you wanted Javier to know, you'd tell him eventually.

Of course he couldn't help wondering what he'd done to you. Several times Javi lay on his bed thinking of your past relationship. He assumed the guy had cheated, that was a real good reason for someone to become brokenhearted but he had a feeling that it could be more than that. Maybe he'd got someone else pregnant? It was one of the theories Javi came up with.

When Steve had one drink after the other after work the day he actually got his shit back together after crying over Connie for weeks, he got tipsy and talkative, and he blabbered everything you'd confided in him.

You'd been left at the altar by your fiance.

You'd been left in front of everybody, family, friends, co-workers, while wearing a beautiful wedding dress that you picked so carefully, in order to make that day perfect in every way.

Your fiance had publicly humiliated you just like Javier did with fiancee a decade prior.

Javier hated your ex with passion for what he did to you, and he hated himself even more to know that in a way, he was also that guy.

He had to try and stop you from getting even more hurt by being around him, but just like everything in life, he screwed things up.

When you woke up the morning after that horrible night, you wanted to disappear. You groaned as a pounding headache reminded you constantly of your very poor choices the night before and you closed your eyes wishing as hard as you could that what had happened would be just an awful nightmare and nothing more.

But you needed to face reality.

But reality could wait a little, so you spent the weekend locked in your apartment, literally playing dead, not wanting to see anyone as you thought about everything you were doing in life, you were so tired of that situation, tired of Javier, tired of your feelings for him. You were also tired of what was about to come, you just wished your heart would stop aching like it did.

When Monday came, you ignored everyone and did your job. You went out for lunch on your own and returned for another shift of not making visual contact with anyone and praying that lump in your throat that suffocated you would go away.

Javier and Murphy kept their voices low, so you didn't distinguish what they talked about, eventually you felt their gaze on you, which you also ignored.

Steve looked around nervously at Javier who just looked away, avoiding you as much as you did him, but continued walking towards your desk, stopping right in front of it and rubbing the back of his neck.

"Um… Y/N?" Murphy smiled nervously "Javi and I left some reports with you last week because you were helping us with it and Messina wants them… where are they?"

You bit your lips at the urgent need of bursting out laughing at his face.

After everything they'd done, Steve had blabbered about your personal life and Javier… well, you didn't even like to remember it, they still wanted you to do their job?

You thought of many ways you could snap in front of them, make a scandal and have the entire office's attention on them, but you quickly gave up, instead, you raised your head with a sweet smile

"Oh sorry Steve, I forgot them at home, but they'll be here first thing in the morning" you assured them.

When both Javier and Murphy got to work the next day they found a huge pile of unfinished documents to fill. They looked at each other in confusion but what you'd done quickly sank in. For one second, they were both naive to the point of actually believing you would help them do their job after what happened.

•••

Three weeks had passed since the Javier incident and you'd never been more isolated from everyone. As Javi used to be your favorite person to hang out, you still talked to Steve and Connie, and some other people from the office, but you ended up distancing yourself and they didn't seem to be too eager to get your company, so it was not like they missed you.

Steve was still single, going to bars almost every night but also managing to be a functional drunk by day and work as a cop.

As for Javier you didn't know and you didn't care, sometimes you could smell coffee coming from his apartment, or cooking oil, which meant he was probably making himself some french fries. He loved them just like the man child he was.

You also didn't hear any commotion from his place, which meant whoever he was fucking was being silent.

You missed him on a daily basis, everything reminded you of Javi and sometimes it even took you some time to process you weren't friends anymore when you saw something nice or funny and wanted to show him.

But at the same time, you also felt proud of yourself for working on your emotional detachment from him. The first few days you thought it was impossible to be away from him, but you were getting by.

On the other hand, one consequence of Javi's distance from you was the fact that Carlos took it as an invitation to hit on you.

He started small, discret, but consistent. At first he just left small chocolates around your desk because he was so pathetic he had to imitate Javier, not being able to come up with an idea on his own.

You always got rid of them by placing them on Steve's desk when he wasn't around which led him to think they were a gift from Colleen. You chuckled to yourself when you heard his theory. You knew the fire was about to spread in that department but you simply didn't care. You wanted them all to fuck off.

Then Carlos left you post its with several messages. They started humble and innocent, calling you pet names and other stuff, but after a while they started to become spicy, until he left you full, explicit words of what he would like to do with you in that ugly, sloppy handwriting of his.

You kept them all in your drawer, you knew when the time was right you'd be able to use them in your favor.

The morning you decided to wear a pencil skirt to work was when everything began going to shit. First, Javier's jaw dropped; he couldn't even pretend he didn't acknowledge your existence anymore. Instead, he just followed you with his eyes all around the office, like an animal and he didn't even care.

His jeans got tighter and he would let Pablo Escobar produce all the cocaine in the world if he could only know if you were wearing panties along that skirt or not.

The mere idea of you bare under that teasing outfit in your workplace was enough to send shivers down his spine. It was enough to take all his focus away and the only picture in Javier's mind was to have you sitting on his desk, legs spread wide while he had his face buried between your folds. At that moment, he wanted to be nothing but your fuck boy, to make it up to you by fucking you like no other.

"We gotta go, perv" Murphy interrupted his wet daydreams and reminded him they'd have to go to the streets.

Carlos took their departure as an invitation to come closer, and as you grabbed yourself a cup of water he slapped your ass.

"Ay que culo sabroso princesa" he whispered into your ear, without warning and making you spill some of your water. He laughed softly "leaving a wet path for me already?"

Your blood boiled, if you had access to a gun you knew you would probably shoot that pig in the face, you wanted to scream at the top of your lungs until someone actually put you out of your misery.

You were so fed up, so tired, so angry with men taking everything from you. Your fiance, Javier, Murphy, Carlos… you felt you couldn't even live your life without having one of them ruining some aspect of it somehow. It stirred something in you and an idea popped into your head. You took a deep breath and controlled yourself again, you were going to make him pay, because if one of them got punished, the others would learn from the lesson.

You turned to him and smirked.

"You're all talk and no action. You've been dropping little dirty notes on my desk like a horny teen and made no moves… are you even interested in me?" You batted your eyes at him.

Carlos frowned softly and chuckled.

"I thought you hated me, you went pretty feral when I talked about Peña a while ago, didn't ya?"

"I did, but Peña is no longer in the picture and I heard hate fucks can be even better than love ones… I haven't tried these yet, but maybe you could help me with that?" You smirked and took his hand writing down the address to a shady hostel known by the cops who investigated downtown.

"Eight PM. Bring a bottle of wine and a bottle of lube, ya que te gusta mi culo" you whispered and saw the color drain from his ugly, pathetic face. "Nobody will suspect a cop and an assistant carrying out an investigation there, right?" You winked at him and walked away.

Carlos believed you so easily for a second you though he was the one messing with you, but turns out he was just simply and straight up stupid.

The next step was easy.

You excused yourself to mail some documents and on your way back you also mailed the collection of obscene post-its to Carlos' house, where his wife received them. The last one had the time and the address she should go to.

And the rest was history.

When morning came, gossip spread through the office like wildfire, thanks to Colleen who heard it from a cop, who heard it from another and by 9AM everyone knew agent Carlos Galindo had been caught red-handed by his wife who immediately pulled out a huge scene dragging attention from the whole block.

There was crying, screaming, slapping, scratching and accusations, and according to Colleen, Mrs.Galindo had kicked him out of home and forbade him from seeing the kids.

Apparently a mysterious woman had set the whole thing up, and no one knew her identity.

Though Murphy had a pretty good idea, he shot you a smirk "don't you think it's a whole lotta coincidence Carlos got into this shit now that he'd been harrassing you?"

ou shrugged and smiled big, it was the first time Javier had seen you smile for real in almost a month and he cursed himself to see his heart skipped a beat.

"Well, I know some men think they can get away with everything, but they gotta learn they can't just play with women as if we were nothing" you accidentally glanced at Javier and he caught your eyes. Shit.

You cleared your throat and hoped you weren't blushed "anyway, whoever did this knew he deserved it" you winked at Steve and went back to work.

You were finishing another report, going over the spelling again to make sure there were no mistakes when a commotion dragged your attention.

You could hear some muffled voices which became loud as someone approached the room. You looked at Javier and Murphy, the three of you confused at what the heck was going on.

Colleen's voice wasn't much more than a nervous squeak, telling whoever the person that was coming wasn't a good idea.

And then you saw him.

Carlos was standing there, fuming, with red blood eyes, looking like he hadn't seen a shower in ages, still with his work uniform and staring at you with a death glare.

Anyone could see he was clearly out of his mind, but everyone seemed to look at him in a mix of awe and curiosity.

You thought it was so amusing to see him in that shitty state, but your smile immediately died when you saw him taking some steps towards you. He had a bottle of wine in hands and his lips twitched in an attempt of a smile which turned into a sinister face.

"Buenos días puta" he said "I waited for you last night, but you never showed up, whore. My wife did though and she wasn't happy about it, and I bet my heavy balls you were the cum dumpster slut who called her" he said getting near your desk at the same time Javier stood up, calling Carlos' name in order to draw attention to himself, but he was ignored.

"I'm such a gentleman I even brought you your bottle of wine, I hope you enjoy it, puta" he said angrily before shattering the bottle against the edge of your desk and spilling wine all over the floor. Carlos' hand immediately yanked a handful of your hair and pulled you against his body, pointing the sharp glass towards your neck.

Murphy and Javier began trying to talk to him, in order to distract the man and get you safely out of his hands.

The grip on your hair was painful and though you didn't think Carlos would do it, you couldn't help but being scared.

"You're nothing but a bitch, a cum dumpster for the guys in the office, you are worthless Y/N, you destroyed my marriage and now you'll pay, you'll s-"

Carlos was interrupted mid sentence when Javier elbowed his ribs as hard as he could, ignoring completely his police training that was clear when it said the agents should keep calm in a dangerous situation, he just went to action. He didn't give a shit if Murphy wanted to follow the protocol, he wouldn't stand there and watch that motherfucker talk to you like that, let alone try to hurt you.

Carlos dropped the sharp bottleneck and gasped for air, as you ran away from his grip and didn't know what to do.

He immediately turned to Javier, all his anger focused on the man, as they began a real dog fight, Carlos threw a few punches at Javier, but he stepped over the spilled wine and fell onto the floor. Peña didn't think twice before kicking him, not caring if he was already down. Carlos managed to stand up even though he struggled and laughed softly as found you pressed against the wall, watching the scene with horror in your eyes.

"You're scared now? Don't be, malparida. Save your scared look for when I'm fucking all of your tight pretty holes until you are crying and bleeding and whimpering for your manwhore prince charming to save you" he said darkly "I'll do you worse than any Escobar men would"

Everybody went silent when you heard the click of a gun's safety. Carlos went dead quiet when he felt the cold metal against his neck.

You could barely believe the scene of Javier standing there, pointing a gun at a fellow cop just to defend you. Murphy also tried to calm the both of them down, but at that moment you felt as if you'd gone deaf. All you could hear was Javier's words.

"Turn around, Carlos. Turn around nice and slowly" he commanded in a surprisingly calm voice and the disgusting man who had just been making horrible threats looked like a scared stray dog, obeying Javier, he meet his angry eyes.

"Now you listen to me… you will never get near Y/N again, got it? Never!!! You will never step into the same room she's in, you will never call her those things, got it? She's not a puta, she's not a whore, she's not a cum dumpster… You deserved what happened to you and if you make Y/N slightly uncomfortable I'll shoot you in the face" Javi lowered his aim a little, now his gun pointed right between Carlos' eyes.

"I'll do you worse than Escobar men would"

The man went completely silent as he remained at Javier's gunpoint.

No matter how many times Murphy and other people that arrived just in time to watch the grotesque scene asked Peña to calm down. He would still hold his gun against Carlos, the waves of rage flowing through his body as he thought of every second of what that animal had done to you.

His heart was racing with adrenaline and he felt an urge to pull the trigger.

He just came back to his senses when he felt a soft, warm hand on his arm, looking at it and recognizing the pretty nails done just like he loved observing.

"Javi… put the gun down please"

Your voice calling his name after so long of being ignored. He wasn't Peña, he wasn't Javier. He was Javi. He was your Javi again, at least that was what he hoped for.

He looked at you and saw your scared eyes, finally putting his gun down just like you'd asked for and nodded at you.

"It's okay, it's over now, cariño, I'm here to protect you"

_____

A/N: did you guys go soft for Javi now?

642 notes · View notes

royalsweetteaa · 2 years

Text

Capital of needs

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x housemaid!reader

WARNING - the following contains: nothing crazy - fluff, soft!Ransom (kinda), Ransom being needy, touch starved Ransom, affectionate gestures (hugs, kisses, cuddles), insomniac Ransom, light angst, sickness (fever), sex is briefly mentioned/suggested but no smut.

Summary: You’re Ransom’s housemaid and you get to learn more about the trust fund manchild from a different perspective as you earn a place in his heart.

Working for Harlan’s grandson, Hugh Ransom Drysdale wasn’t easy. The money paid well and was worth the extra trouble caused by him, but recently he was becoming all the more demanding. Not for the reasons you would have expected though.

You were offered to be Ransom’s housemaid as his parents’ concern grew from how little their son maintained his own house. He was always out doing something, and would rarely clean up after himself when he came back home late at night.

Your first week of cleaning Ransom’s house was rough to say the least. There were alcohol bottles everywhere, and the house reeked of cigarettes.

You bought supplies sponsored by his mother to freshen up the house. There was one scented candle in each room with the smell of a different flower. The smell of roses, lavender, jasmine and gardenia was heaven to your nostrils while you continued to clean up. You remember seeing Ransom’s face when he walked in and he cringed from the smell, saying it smelled like Poison Ivy herself had a laboratory experiment in the place. You rolled your eyes at his dramatic reaction.

Ransom would all but change his habits of cleaning up after himself after the many weeks of being a housemaid. You did however notice how he would more often stay at home and entertain himself by being on his computer or watching TV. Probably watching porn, you would think. It made you giggle to imagine despite how childish it was.

Ransom would start calling after you to do the simplest tasks too, which displayed his arrogance to the fullest.

“Turn on the TV.” He would call out while you were in the kitchen working on dinner. He was only a few feet from the TV.

“Find me something to wear!” He would shout while he stood by his closet. You were in the bathroom, cleaning the floor.

“I want some snacks. Now.” He would demand as he sat on the kitchen island while you were washing the windows.

It took some time for you to pick up he was doing it for your attention as he would just stare at you while you completed his tasks of demands. Like he had nothing better to do. He would also throw in a few condescending comments as you did his tasks, as he was so high and mighty.

“Look at you. Doing all the work like the good maid you are paid to be.”

You ignored him as much as possible, occasionally rolling your eyes at his playful demeanor.

What would change your relationship was when Ransom came home late from his parents with clear rage. You had just cooked dinner for him, and yet he had to pull a tantrum by insulting you. He was basically taking out his anger on you by saying rude things, such as;

“You’re useless!”

“You’re only here because of my family’s money!”

“You could put effort in how you look when you’re working here.”

You knew what he was doing. He was trying to get a reaction from you, and you were going to give him just that, except not in the way he wanted to.

“Now, now. There’s no need to be mad at me just because you had a bad day. There’s little stopping me from quitting if you’re going to treat me like that.” You stated firmly.

He immediately shut his mouth but soon after followed it with a scoff. “Yeah, right. You’re earning bank by working for me. You wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh, you wanna test that theory? Fine then. I’ll leave in the count of five and if you don’t apologize, I’ll see myself out.”

He gritted his teeth as reality hit him of how serious you were. “One….” You counted. “…two….three…” His body language was indicating distress as you got closer to the last number. “Four….fi-!”

“Alright, alright! I-I’m sorry! There, are you happy?” He raised his hands in surrender.

You sighed and nodded. “Good. Now, I know you have some…family issues and I’m sure some of it justifies you being upset. But it’ll never help to take those negative emotions over others in the process. I’m not suggesting to be your therapist or for you to share your issues, but just know if you feel like talking about something, I am here. Communicate with me rather than taking out your frustration on me.” You advised as you stepped closer to him.

He looked to the side, nodding hesitantly before mumbling an ‘okay’ under his breath. You giggled at his usual stubbornness.

“Come here. Let me give you a bear hug.” You said, and approached him with open arms. He froze as you wrapped your arms around him, giving his back slow strokes of comfort. You were evaluating on wether or not it was the best idea to do that, but soon enough Ransom relaxed into you and wrapped his arms around your waist as his head dipped to relax on your shoulder. You stayed like that for what seemed like forever before you laid together on the sofa and cuddled.

It wasn’t supposed to happen, but it was late and Ransom didn’t want to let go of you. You woke up super early in the morning the day after to go home as it was your free day of the week.

When you returned the day after that, Ransom was still at home, and again came in the requests of simple tasks he could have done by himself. This time he would add ‘please’ to his requests as you had expressed your dislike to his demanding commands.

He was like a grumpy cat who had finally learned to appreciate being petted and given attention by its owner. That was how you liked to describe it - to yourself anyway.

When Ransom was in a very good mood, he would flirt with you and brush past you, just to have the excuse of touching you.

When that didn’t seem to phase you, Ransom became more needy by the day, becoming blunt enough to request physical intimacy. That was when you thought it was important to remind him of your position as it seems he has forgotten it.

“Ransom, I’m your housemaid. I’m supposed to clean, cook and work, not hang around on the sofa curled up with you. It was only a one time thing.” You huffed.

Ransom rolled his eyes. “Yeah, you work for me so when I want to be held, you should listen. I want your hugs. Now.” Ransom demanded once again.

You shook your head, more to yourself and continued filling the dishwasher with used utensils.

Ransom groaned and walked towards you lazily.

“Y/N….” Ransom whined your name. “Stop ignoring meeee.”

“Listen, I have a lot to do! Maybe if you helped out a bit, I could have time for you, but I don’t, so….”

You didn’t know why you suggested that last part, but surprisingly it appealed to him.

“Really? Is that a promise?” Ransom asked smugly.

“…Maybe? Though I doubt the Hugh Ransom Drysdale would possibly be willing to help someone so low class as his housemaid.” You challenged.

“Tch, don’t insult me. You should know by now that I’m only willing when I get something good in return. It’s not like I’m the one being paid to do stuff.” He reminded.

“And did you hear me complain? I only said I don’t have time for you when you make me have so much to do. That’s all.” You simply defended.

Ransom fell quiet at that. He sighed and walked over to you and decided to help out taking in the used plates and cups. His face scrunched as he took the plate that still had a few rests from what Ransom had eaten earlier, his classical breakfast - egg and bacon with toast.

“You know you used that plate, right? It’s just crumbs of your leftovers.” You pointed out.

“It’s still…gross.” He complained.

You shook your head and laughed with a smile. Together you put the last bowls in the dishwasher and pressed ‘start’ for it to begin doing its magic.

“There. We done now?” Ransom asked with a monotone voice.

“Well, I still have to take out your clothes for drying, and there was also some dust upstairs I need to vacuumclean -“

“Fuck that.” He blurted out with impatience. “You’re done for the day. You could use a break anyways. C’mere.”

He grabbed your hand and led you to the couch before pulling you in his arms for you to be nuzzled against him. He lifted his feet up on the sofa to make himself comfortable, and you simply laid your head on his chest and let his arms drape around you. There was a thud you couldn’t quite point your finger on, but ignored it.

“I haven’t slept well since that first night of being like this…I’ve missed it.” Ransom confessed, which made your ears perk up in interest.

Ransom would rarely confess anything personal, and to know you had helped him fall asleep so easily was something to brag about in itself.

“Awww, has the mean, grumpy Ransom grown into a softie?” You teased. You looked up at him to be met by his annoyed gaze.

“Shut the fuck up. You just have the perfect form to have you lay on me and not have it feel like my back is about to break. Plus - your body temperature feels good against me. It makes me fall asleep easily.” There’s a slight pause before he adds; “You’re basically a human heating pad to me.”

Of course he had to say that. He was way too embarrassed to admit he just really liked to be curled up with you when he could get just about any girl to be like this. But you guessed for whatever real reason there was behind it, he needed this a lot.

You sneaked out after 3 hours, not wanting to repeat the mistake of sleeping over the whole night. You needed to set a few ground rules, and what better time than to do just that while Ransom was sleeping?

The following day, you got a fever, and you called in sick from showing up for work at Ransom’s house. After getting confirmation from Linda, you left your phone on the nightstand and fell in deep slumber.

Your eyes blinked open as you heard the sound of someone banging your door and spamming the doorbell. You rose up from the bed slowly, making careful steps over to the front door and opening it.

“Ransom..?” You muttered, scanning his body and recognizing the brown coat. It wasn’t fully registering in your head that the guy stood before you, not to mention that he looked furious.

“So we’re playing this game now, sweetheart? Gonna pretend you’re sick so you can avoid me? That’s rude. I go vulnerable twice and you’re already done?” Ransom asked with arms crossed.

You groaned tiredly. “…I really don’t need this right now, Ransom…I’m sick with a fever…leave before I cough on your face and make you sick too.”

“Well too bad, I need you at my house before things become a mess again.” He argued.

You didn’t reply as you turned to go back to your bedroom. You collapsed onto the bed and let out a few coughs before trying to cover yourself with blankets. Ransom followed suit, almost offended that you ignored him.

“So you weren’t lying. It still doesn’t explain why you had to leave. You could have stayed at my house and be sick there.”

You nuzzled your face onto the pillow, not wanting to hear more of Ransom’s nonsense. He obviously was only here to argue, and you were in no shape of doing so. You heard him sigh when you returned no response, and he stepped out of your room, locking the door behind him.

You thought he would go home and leave you for the rest of the day, but Ransom was unpredictable.

He returned with a bag with a logo of your local pharmacy and threw it onto the bed beside you.

“Here. These should help you get better.”

You blinked up at him, bewildered that he had returned. “How did you…get in again?”

“I took your house key…it was literally on the counter beside the door.”

“Right…” you muttered, before shuffling through the bought items Ransom had brought for you. “Thanks, Ransom…I’ll pay you back when I get my paycheck.”

Ransom scoffed. “Psh, don’t think about it. It barely cost anything.”

“Not for me it doesn’t. Besides, you didn’t have to do this for me, but yet you did. Why?” You asked, curiously looking up at him.

He bit the inside of his cheek, looking rather unsure on how to respond. “I just….I just need you to get well quicker so that you can get back to work. There’s already trash everywhere and it needs to be taken care of as soon as possible.”

You nodded while having the palm of your hand on your forehead. You were so warm, it was almost unbearable. “Mhm. Alright, I’ll try to get better by the end of the week. I’ll contact you before I make my return.”

He hummed in response, and made his way out, muttering a ‘get well’ before closing the door behind him.

Your fever had toned down with the help of the medicine Ransom had brought you the day prior. Despite that, you still felt very drowsy and not fit for work, so you decided to call it another sick day. You read a book and relaxed with closed eyes as you patiently waited for your body to fight the sickness.

This day wouldn’t either end Ransom-free as you thought - no, expected it to be.

You knew who it was by the door based on how impatiently the door bell rang again. A groan slipped out of your mouth as you opened the door, being met by an annoyed Ransom. Nothing unusual.

“What.” You deadpanned.

“Still sick? Your immune system must suck ass.”

“I guess so.” You shrugged, not sure if he was trying to be funny.

“Have you used the medicine I bought you?”

“No, I threw it out.” You said sarcastically. “Of course I used it.”

“So, you’re not coming to my house today?” He had the nerve to ask when it was past 06:00 PM.

“It’s late in the evening, Ransom. So no. I’m not coming to your house. As you concluded yourself, I’m not in any shape or form able to work today.” You replied, trying your best to sound unbothered.

He huffed, assumingely out of annoyance but you didn’t care. You left him by the door again and stepped back to your room. “Well, if that is all, I’ll be leaving you. Good night, Ransom.”

You shuffled back to your bedroom and weren’t surprised to not hear a reply. Soon after you heard the door close. That was the end of that, you thought.

You were yet again disproven when you heard steps coming towards your room, and it was Ransom with his shoes, scarf and coat taken off. You were already under the bed sheets, staring at him as he made his way closer to you.

“What are you doing?”

He shrugged and stood by the bed, gesturing you to scoot over and make room on your bed.

You frowned, but did as he said.

Surely he wasn’t going to…

With that, Ransom had joined you in bed, having his arms around you tightly as the two of you tried your best to find comfort with the small space of your bed. Ransom was a big man, and you started to worry if the bed would break when added his weight, but you heard no questionable sounds from the bed suggesting it. There was a brief silence as you laid there together, until you couldn’t contain your curiosity.

“Ransom, what are we doing?” You had to ask, still ever so confused as to what was going through this man’s mind.

“Taking a nap, darling.” He responded casually. The nickname took you by absolute surprise.

“You can do that at home.” You argued.

“No. Not without you.“ He sighed, indicating he wasn’t going to further explain himself. You were restless enough to ask the daring question to further know his intentions.

“Why?”

Ransom rolled his eyes, and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Because I’ve already told you. I can’t sleep well without holding you. I have been dealing with insomnia for so long, and you seem to be my best and healthiest recourse.” He explained. “You have no idea how fucking embarrassing it is to admit it, but it’s nothing but the truth. It’s not like I have any better excuse or a way to lie out of it - not one that would prevent me from being kicked out by you. I need this.”

A cackle erupted from your mouth. “What makes you so sure I wouldn’t kick you out regardless? Besides, couldn’t any of your lady friends help you out? Surely you could even hire someone to be in my position right now all the time.” You suggested.

“I have tried. I have let some of my….escorts stay longer in my bed after we first were like this. I thought it would solve my issue regardless of who the woman was but…for some strange reason, it only seems to work for you.”

“That’s pretty odd…” you muttered. “Also, ew. I swear if you haven’t taken a shower since you last were with a woman-!”

“Relax, I’m not that lazy not to care about hygiene. Not having a shower after intense, hot sex is gross for anyone who has decency.” Ransom defended himself.

Your face scrunched at Ransom’s descriptive sharing, but you quickly shrugged it off. “Well, because I’m so nice, I’ll let you stay. But don’t be mad if you get a fever. We are close enough as it is to guarantee you’ll get sick too.” You warned him.

“I’m fine with that. That just means you’ll have to take care of me.” Ransom said with a mischievous grin.

“Need I remind you I’m your housemaid? Not a nurse.”

“I’ll tell my mom to double your paycheck if you take on both jobs.” He offered with no hesitation.

“Deal.”

For the rest of the evening, you would relax in each others embrace while occasionally asking about each other. Ransom was the one who especially seemed interested in getting to know you better with his questions, everything from as simple as asking what your favorite colour was - to what your relationship with your family was like.

You had to admit you found this side of Ransom to be incredibly nice. While you talked, he would sometimes grab your hand and play with it, studying your nails which made you feel a little nervous, but he didn’t comment anything snarky.

At one point when he seemed to be more sleepy, he folded his fingertips together with yours, earning your stomach a fluttering feeling. It was so unreal you almost had paused from talking for too long. You pretended you didn’t notice his affectionate gesture and continued with your story.

Eventually he fell asleep, his light snoring confirming he wasn’t listening to your talk anymore. You turned off your light from the night stand and snuggled into his chest. It was certain you would wake up all healthy and well tomorrow. You were sure of it.

Waking up in the morning was a pleasant experience to you now that you had cleared nostrils and throat. You had finally beat the fever and were ready to get back to work. Ransom had left early the same morning, so all you had to do was eat, get dressed and head towards his house.

When you arrived, you were all but shocked at the mess you were met with after only being away for two days. There were empty whiskey bottles standing tall on the floor and by the kitchen counter. There were also stacked up plates and utensils by the kitchen sink, and used towels gathered on the armchair.

“This is going to be a long day,” you muttered under your breath.

Ransom came from the bathroom only in boxers and put a used towel on the armchair, along with the many other stacked towels. He turned to you and grinned when he saw your eyes were wandering.

“Hey sweetheart. You’re just in time. I’m hungry and could eat something that isn’t take out. Fix something up for me, will you? I stocked the fridge with plenty of things.” He informed. “Oh, and make something for yourself. We should eat lunch together this time.”

You were stunned at his expressiveness. He didn’t shout nor sound demanding. He must be in a really good mood, you thought.

Ransom turned to you once again and noticed you were still just standing there. “Well? Get a move on. The eggs don’t get fried by themselves.”

Ah, there it was.

You immediately got to work and pulled out the ingredients, heating up the oven and preparing plates at the table. At the same time, you put the used ones in the dishwasher, and brushed up dust and crumbs from the counters and floor. Multitasking at its finest.

When Ransom came back fully dressed, he was greeted by a completed set of breakfast. He eagerly rushed to the table and helped himself, just about to take the first bite, but he stopped when he noticed you weren’t there.

He shouted your name and sighed when he heard you calling back from upstairs. Quickly, he ran up and saw you were working on his laundry.

“You can do that later. I want you to join me.”

“Ransom, I have already eaten. I’m only here to work. Go ahead and enjoy yourself.” You encouraged while you separated his colored laundry with white.

“Well I’m not going to eat anything if you don’t come. How unfortunate that we have to waste so much food…”

That had you ultimately defeated. It made you groan internally that you had to oblige to this man’s childish ways of getting things his way. Though, it was also somewhat sweet that he was this desperate to have you join him.

“Fine. I’ll come, you manchild.” You finally evaluated.

“I’m not a manchild!” He defended himself, sounding quite offended.

“That’s exactly what a manchild would say.”

Neither of you talked much as you ate your portions of lunch. You would sometimes catch him looking at you, a smirk perking up his lips. You returned a simple smile, and he seemed to be pleased by it.

He munched the last piece of his sandwich and slugged against his seat, satisfied. “This was delicious. Thank you, Y/N.”

His polite expression, which he rarely used made you feel content. You had barely eaten anything, but it seemed what was most important to him was for you to be present.

He helped you clean up and put the dishes in, making the job all the more easier. You thanked him, and then you resumed your work around the house.

As usual, he lingered around the spaces you were in. To your understanding, Ransom hadn’t been out with people for a long time since the beginning of your work at his house. He would always be out for parties and come home drunk, sleeping out the hangover for the rest of the night.

For weeks he hasn’t upheld this routine. It was almost as though he had lost appeal for what he once called a lifestyle. Maybe he was looking for self approvement, you thought.

Dinner was like lunch. You made it and he asked (more like nagged) for you to join him.

After dinner, you were about to pack your bag and get yourself ready to leave when all of a sudden, Ransom approached you walking in a rather strange manner.

“Y/N….I’m feeling awfully hot right now. I need you to take me to my room.” He said as he let out heavy breaths, almost stumbling when he walked over to you.

Concern washed over you and you immediately came to his aid, having his arm around your shoulder as you led him upstairs to his bedroom.

When he laid down on the bed, you reached your hand to his forehead, almost gasping at how hot he was. “Ransom…I think you’re sick.”

“No shit.” Ransom said nonchalantly.

“Well, It’s only 07:00 PM. The pharmacy should still be open. I’ll go and buy some stuff so you can-!“

“No, that won’t be necessary.” He shrugged off. “It’s just a fever. I could need some help though because I tend to be more helpless when my mind is all dazed out.”

“Okay, well I’ll come much early in the morning then-!” You were about to suggest.

“No, wait!” He hastily interrupted again. “You could just stay here instead.”

“Ransom….”

“I…I’ll pay you to stay overtime. I really need assistance. Don’t leave me. Please…” he plastered a fake pout on his face. How could you resist him when he was pleading this much?

“Okay…just this once. But I’ll be sleeping in the guest room.” You said, slightly narrowing your eyebrow in suspicion of his reply. He reluctantly agreed and the both of you settled yourselves for sleep.

You weren’t mentally prepared for the constant literal ‘wake up calls’ from Ransom for each half hour that passed during the night.

He would come up to the guest room you were using and tell you to do things for him because he was apparently too helpless to do it himself.

“I need tea to help my sore throat.”

“I could really eat some soup right now.”

“Could you assist me taking a cold shower?”

The last one threw you off as you knew he was just being a smug bastard. His face told you as much.

You found it hard to believe a fever couldn’t put an insomniac to sleep. Then again, you knew little about the implications of insomnia, and so you didn’t question his management to stay awake.

At 03:00 AM, you heard his steps closing in to your door once again, and you immediately rose up, wanting to be done with whatever Ransom wanted you to handle.

He almost took it by surprise when he made it there and saw you standing almost half asleep. He chuckled, knowing he had dragged you through this long enough.

“You know, if you really want me to stop bothering you, you know what to do.” He said as he leaned onto the door frame.

It took you a few moments to figure out what he meant because you were so tired, but it quickly came back to mind of what he had said was the only thing that removed his insomnia. “You really are the neediest man in the whole world.” You concluded.

By the time you closed your eyes in Ransom’s embrace, you were completely knocked out. You were so tired after a long day of working, you could barely stay awake for a little. Ransom’s beating heart fell into deaf ears as your mind went in full shut down mode for the night, and you were fast asleep for the next 10 hours.

You had to agree that being in this man’s arms was incredibly comfortable. His chest while well defined with muscle was pleasantly nice to rest your head on, especially with the added layer of his soft sweater.

It was 01:00 PM when you opened your eyes for the first time since early in the morning. You almost jolted awake when you laid your eyes on the clock, not understanding how you had slept for this long. Ransom’s side of the bed was empty, which left you confused as to why he hadn’t woken you up.

You should have been working a long time ago by now. Why hadn’t he tried to shake you awake?

You walked down to the kitchen where you heard a ruckus going on from the floor of Ransom’s bedroom and when you appeared in the kitchen, you were met by absolute chaos. On the table was what looked like several failed attempts of making fried eggs with some being burned and others being undercooked. Ransom stood by the oven, having a frustrating expression on his face as he tried his best to perfect the sixth egg.

“Fuck! Why is this so hard?!” He groaned loudly to himself. You let out a giggle when you were witnessing the helpless, needy man attempting to make breakfast.

His attention turned to your form, taken aback by the fact that you were already down here.

“Give me like 5 minutes. I’m making breakfast for the two of us, but as you can see, I’m fucking struggling.” He said, and pointed to the burnt toasts on a plate beside the toaster.

You quickly rushed over to give assistance and noticed he had turned on the temperature of each kitchen asset to maximum heat, which explained why he had a hard time making fried eggs and not having the outer part completely burned by the second.

“Ransom, you should be in your room and rest. Your fever will last for at least another day before you get well.” You said as you turned off the oven and stove before you grabbed his arm to lead him back to bed.

Ransom only laughed and halted you from taking him anywhere, leaving you with a confused frown. “Am I sick though?” He asked, as if it was a trick question.

It then hit you at once. He had no major symptoms other than a hot forehead and dazed facade. “You faked it? This whole time?? But how? I literally measured your temperature and everything!”

“I have some tricks up my sleeve. Used a hot towel on my forehead before you measured my temp.” He explained.

That left you absolutely baffled how an old primary school trick had convinced you he wasn’t tricking you. “That is so cruel! Why would you even do that?” You whined, feeling embarrassed that you had put so much effort for his comfort for no good reason at all.

“Had to convince you somehow to stay with me. Wanted to treat you for breakfast in the morning but as you can see…I fucked up.” He sighed, looking back at the mess he had created at his many attempts.

“Oh…well, that’s kind of you but you really didn’t have to lie about being sick for you to make me breakfast and-!”

“I like you.” He interrupted, while he closed the large gap between the two of you.

Your mouth fell shut with his confession, desperately looking for any hint of it being a casual joke but there was none. He looked dead serious into your eyes as he let those words leave his mouth.

“W-What? This has to be a joke. I work for you, Ransom..”

He shook his head, knowing he had countless of times said a lot of awful things to you in the past because you were only ‘the help’, but he knew different now. “That doesn’t matter. I want you to give me a chance by letting me take you out for dinner. Go out with me. Please.” He plead.

You scoffed as assumptions clouded your mind with what kind of intentions he might have behind asking you out. “What, you’re that desperate to keep me within your grasp just so you can sleep better? Because that isn’t how relationships work, Ransom.”

He frowned. “Is that how you see it? You didn’t take notice of the countless times my heart would beat faster the closer you got to me? Because let me tell you, I never get anxious to any women, darling. It’s only you. The fact that I’m standing here, telling you all of this should mean something, no? You really think I’d tell anyone anything remotely close to what I’m confessing right now? How when you gave that hug the night I was being an asshole, I was on the verge of crying because I have never had anyone show as much care as you did? How every time I hold you, it’s the only time I have peace in my miserable mind?” He questioned rhetorically, not expecting an actual answer but wanting to make you understand how he feels. “I have never felt anything like this in my whole life. Your presence alone when you come to my house makes my whole day. The times I’ve spent getting to know you has been the happiest moments of my life because guess what? You actually have a place in my cold ass heart. I just - I really fucking like you.”

Your mouth was left agape at the heavy load of confessions being revealed to you. You forgot how to breathe till he reached the end of his admission, finally letting a shuttering gasp slip out as your face reddened from ear to cheeks.

Ransom didn’t blink once while he waited for your response, but of course, Ransom wasn’t one to wait for long. He pulled your shoulders forward against him and connected his lips to yours. You squealed at his sudden affectionate gesture, but gave in easily as it was too hard to resist his soft, plump lips. He hummed into the kiss as his one hand stroked your back, careful not to slip further down. He wanted to prove he was worthy of you, even though he always had a mentality of expecting others to prove worthy of him. But you were different.

He pulled away eventually and put his forehead onto yours, a smile growing on his lips. It was too genuine to be fake, you concluded in your thoughts. You swallowed and reached a hand to his cheek which he seemed to melt into.

“Why do you have to be this sweet despite being an annoying nag otherwise?”

“I’ll take that instead of ‘asshole’ and ‘trust fund prick’ any time.” He chuckled. “How about you make us breakfast and I’ll treat you to a nice dinner in the evening?”

You pondered playfully, tapping your index finger on your chin as you pretended to think. “Hmmm, I don’t know. Am I really more than just a housemaid if I’m still doing the usual stuff of making you food?”

His signature smirk reappeared on his face as he said: “Still not convinced? Because I think I can find a thing or two to do in the bedroom to show you how much I like you.”

You giggled and lightly placed your hand on his chest. He was right. It was hammering.

“How about we take it slow and keep it at cuddles and kisses for now?”

“Of course. That sounds perfect.”

Note from author: felt like going for just pure fluff this time because I needed it. Need an occasional break from the filth. Soft!Ransom is my biggest comfort ngl. Also I’ve just made it canon in my head that Ransom is a playboy who parties a lot (mostly to fill the void of loneliness).

Hearts & Reblogs are appreciated! <3

#ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale x you #ransom drysdale x y/n #ransom drysdale #chris evans #chris evans x reader #cevans characters #chris evans character fanfiction

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captainkirkk · 8 months

Text

✩ WEEKLY FIC ROUND-UP ✩

All the fics I’ve read and really enjoyed in the past week-ish. Reminder: This list features any and all ratings and themes. Please look at tags and warnings on ao3 before reading.

DC (Batfamily)

Birdwatch11 by smilebackwards

Tim hadn’t actually meant to start a popular Batwatch blog.

He hadn’t meant to start a blog at all honestly but by the time he turned eleven he’d accumulated hundreds of pictures of Batman and Robin on his Nikon DSLR and it had just seemed inefficient to go through the trouble of printing them and storing them in a box under his bed when BlogSphere had a perfectly adequate platform.

lost treasure by adelfie

"Dad, I don’t want to do this.”

“It doesn’t matter what you want. This is why we brought you here,” Jack hisses. “So we can get paid.”

Or: When a cozy night out with his parents turns into a night of captivity and torture, Tim is forced to seek protection from his worst nightmare - the Red Hood.

Hey There Demons by hitthedeck

Treating magical threats lightly is never an option, especially when that threat tears holes in realities. To combat this danger, a good hero must remain vigilant and in peak physical condition at all times.

Too bad Red Robin never got that message.

Or, in which even demons can't comprehend why Tim Drake is Like That.

Stranger Things

Tell Me "Don't", So I Can Crawl Back In by KiaraMGrey

When Steve finds himself alone and without friends, following his breakup with Nancy, he decides what he needs is a distraction. Maybe some new friends who don't remind him of the bullshit life he gave up. When he literally runs into Eddie Munson, school drug dealer and self proclaimed freak, an idea begins to form. Who better to show him what life outside popularity can be like, than someone who doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks?

And Eddie? Well, Eddie is just bracing for impact.

Everybody's Friend by AmethystUnarmed

"Hey Harrington,” Eddie calls, as Steve books it to the Beamer.

Steve stops, and is only the slightest bit nervous when he says, “Yeah?”

It almost makes Eddie feel bad.

Almost.

“How’s the character creation going?”

The absolute dread on Steve’s face confirms Eddie's worst fears.

“I... I'm not going to be able to play Thursday.”

God. Dammit.

~~~

Steve's budding friendship with the Hellfire Club hits a few snags and Eddie wonders if all of this was even worth it.

Clone Wars

Standards of Professionality by Trixree

"Are we going to pretend I didn’t just find you fucking your General, vod?” Rex hisses over private-comm.

Cody doesn’t even turn his head to look at him. Rex can hear the smile in Cody’s voice when he replies, “No, because I am not fucking my General, Rex’ika. I am fucking Obi-Wan. We are professionals.”

5 times Cody and Obi-Wan struggled to maintain plausible deniability regarding their affections for one another + 1 time they decidedly Did Not

Shadowhunters

prosper matrimonium by smilebackwards

"Gorgeous, sweet, community-oriented,” Magnus ticks off the positive attributes on his fingers. And he’s sure he’ll find plenty more to like about Alexander Lightwood. “I imagine suitors are beating down his door. Please tell me he’s not actually dating Lorenzo.”

Cat hesitates. “Well, if you’re really interested in Alec, you have interesting timing to say the least.”

“How do you mean?” Magnus asks.

“Alec just put his name in for the prosper matrimonium.”

Or: The disaster with the Circle swings the Clave a little more progressive. And if Magnus wants Alec’s heart, he’s going to have to compete for it

The Umbrella Academy

To Be Where You Are (So Very Far) by bobee

He'd thought he'd seen it all.

Forty-Five years in a wasteland and two weeks saving the world, only to be taken for a year by a man guided by his own self-interest. He'd seen the horrors of what this life has to offer. It's all he's ever seen.

He just hadn't known that there was one out there meant for him.

(or, Number Five, the end of the end of the world, and the start of a new one.)

On My Terms by CivilBores

"I did what you asked,” he tells her. “Now, the briefcase.”

Her eyebrows raise in mock-surprise, red lips curling up her face in a sadistic smile.

“You didn’t think that was all, did you?” she asks.

AU: The Handler gives Five a slightly different deal.

#happy wednesday everyone #weekly fic round up #my posts #fic recs #dc recs #stranger things recs #tua recs #sw recs #shadowhunter recs

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digenerate-trash · 5 months

Note

I ADORE Avery and personally love the “trapped songbird” idea for him being a yandere!

He gets you a phone, but it’s controlled by him, he’s got a tracker on it, and everything. Sometimes he checks the tracker during work and just watches you scamper around school. He expects one good morning text and one good night text, and a call every day! If you forget he’s racing over to “check on you” and make sure you’re “okay”. Really he just fucks you in the back if his car, and tells you to not worry him like that!

He all but destroyés your entire wardrobe so HE can buy you those clothes! You’re only allowed to use things that he’s bought. Big weird provider complex, make up? He paid for. Bus pass? He got it for you. Soap? He’s got the best ones just for you! Probably pays some guys to rough you up so he can be your knight in shining armor and just “happens” to be passing by and saves you!

He probably starts paying Bailey to let you stay at Avery’s penthouse! He chains your leg to the bed, you can reach the bathroom, by yourself, but you need Avery to bring you to the kitchen or living room, where he just rechains you again. If you misbehave, he locks EVERYTHING! Including the bathroom! He watches you like a hawk, not even letting you use the toilet without him staring down his nose at you. Good luck gaining his trust back!

Obviously the parties are still a thing, but he never lets you out of his sight, his hand is on you at all times, pinching and squeezing if you misbehave. Probably starts getting interested in the more underground parties, and eventually Briar gets Avery to bring you on stage where Avery can fuck you for everyone to see him lay his claim.

dude the gold gilded cage is one of my favorite tropes and Avery fits it so well!!!

I know that you have already laid it out so well but I want to add to this so bad!!!

avery has a shock collar that secures it to your thigh before parties so it's a "hidden" security measure to keep you in line and make sure you don't tell anyone about your situation. If necessary he can also turn it up to dangerous levels if you decide to use this party as an escape. not that he takes his hands off you often.

Avery is always putting out subtle threats to you and he not only brings you to brairs to show you off but he has brair tell you about the underground brothel. Avery makes sure he goes into sickening detail. because if you are ungrateful for Avery's company he’ll threaten to send you to brair. (it's not like he really would be much too attached for that but the threat is vivid and worrying)

the more you misbehave the more nessessities he takes from you. first, it's clothes. he likes it when he gets the privilege of punishing you like this. it's like a fun game at this level. taking away your room privileges is still fun. he loves it when you have to beg for things. like moving from one room to the next just because you have to use the bathroom or shower or get food. you have to beg Avery for those things. when it gets to the point where Avery has to take away your food though he's not as excited. he doesn't want to punish you like this but you keep nothing off. or attacking him. he just needs to break you a bit. just give in. Any punishments further than that you're getting bones broken. and Harper is getting a hefty bribe to come to Avery's home and fix you up. Avery doesn't have a light hand and the bruises and breaks hurt for weeks. he always says sorry afterward and kisses your wounds. but you know if you resist him he's willing to break more of you.

He's paying Bailey almost double what Brair would for you and he keeps you at his home he even tells you how much you're worth he rubs your face in it. you have a price on you. a price that he can afford. and you should thank him every chance you get because if Avery didn't have you where would you be?

#ask #avery the businessperson #yan dol #yandere #tw yandere #yandere tropes #x reader #gn reader

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kbandtrash · 6 months

Text

I Don't Dance (I Know You Can) (Hoshi x Reader)

~Rachel~

Masterlist

You're hopeless as a dance trainee, and dance teacher Hoshi isn't sure that teaching you will be worth it for either of you in the long run.

Content: dance teachers!Hoshi and Minghao, enemies to ?lovers?, Hoshi yells at you and apologizes, a general feeling of hopelessness about life, fluff

Word Count: 3.8k

“No. I’m done. I can’t stand her,” Hoshi huffed. “She makes no improvement and she can’t see what she’s doing wrong. I’m done, Minghao. If you want to keep her on, then you take her.”

Minghao smiled wryly. “If you can’t teach her, then no one can.”

“I don’t need to waste my time on a student that’s going nowhere.”

“But I do?”

“That’s why I’m saying we need to drop her!”

“Oh that’s very growth mindset of you,” Minghao drawled sarcastically. “I thought we believed in the potential of every student.”

“I did. I really did.” Hoshi sighed. “But there is something wrong with her.”

“I don’t know, when I sat in today, I noticed she’s actually pretty good at keeping with the beat. Her limbs are like tree branches in the wind, but they’re always in time.”

Hoshi cocked his head. “That is true,” he admitted.

“And her hands are very graceful.”

“Yes,” Hoshi agreed.

“Her facial expressions are pretty natural, too.”

“Yeah, she got that from vocal training.”

“She just got a late start,” Minghao said with a shrug. “If you keep working with her, she’ll be a pro in no time.”

“Yes!” Hoshi exclaimed, pounding his fist into his hand. “It’s not that she’s bad, she’s just inexperienced.”

It was that easy every week. However, the truth remained: you hadn’t a dancing bone in your body. Minghao just liked to watch from the sidelines, and if you ended up getting dropped, he wasn’t sure when he would find his next favorite source of entertainment.

—

“My favorite student!” Hoshi welcomed you warmly to your private lesson.

You glanced at Minghao in the back, who gave you a wink and an okay sign. “My favorite teacher?” you returned uncertainly.

“Did you review the steps we learned last week?”

You nodded energetically. “I made sure to practice every day in front of a mirror like you said.”

“Good, good!” He clapped his hands together. “Let’s start with our warm up moves.”

You moved almost like a mannequin, no fluidity in your joints. Hoshi kept his temper in check, and offered you some suggestions.

“Like this?” you asked, repeating the same clunky motion.

Hoshi smiled only because he had no other expressions left. He modeled the move. “Do it with me slowly.”

It was incredible how intently you watched him and how poorly you managed to perform on your own. If you did get it right once, it was usually pure luck. You apologized over and over, to which he responded through his teeth with a fake cheerfulness.

When it came time for you to leave again, Hoshi managed to keep his cool, even told you that you did well today! You both knew that was a lie, but you also both knew you were giving this your all. There was just nothing to show for it week after week. For you, it was disheartening, but for him, it was infuriating.

“You did well today,” Minghao complimented Hoshi. “You didn’t even raise your voice once.”

“I can’t do this anymore,” Hoshi whispered dangerously. “I’m going to snap.”

Minghao smiled and prepared his next lecture on positivity.

—

“Get out.”

“Hoshi, I told you—”

“I don’t want to hear it,” he said, looking you directly in the eyes. “You’ve wasted my time for too long.”

“I’m trying so hard!” you begged. “I promise I’ve been practicing every day and I felt like I had made improvement!”

“You’re just as miserable as the day you walked in here. We need to reconsider the future of your lessons with us.”

“Hoshi,” Minghao interjected. “I didn’t want to bring this up again, but we’re getting paid twice our usual rate from her company.”

“It’s not worth it anymore,” Hoshi said with a shake of his head. “I don’t know why you bothered trying to learn if you had no talent to back it up.”

“I don’t know either!” you fired back. “I just wanted to sing and play my instrument, but the president said I wasn’t worth anything if I couldn’t dance. Guess he was right.”

You stormed out of the room and grabbed your bag on your way out. Minghao could have sworn he heard you choke back a sob as the door closed.

Hoshi immediately felt hollow inside. He had never messed up like this, and there was no way to take back his words. It wasn’t that he really believed you weren’t worth the time, but he had never had a student learning this slowly, or this late in life, or…

…It was all excuses in the end. No matter how frustrated he got, he shouldn’t have snapped in your face.

He squatted on the floor with his head in his arms. “Why did I do that…?” he mumbled. “I’ve never…never talked to anyone like that before.”

“I don’t know, but you need to apologize immediately,” Minghao said, standing up and pointing at the door. “Go and find her now.”

Hoshi looked up at Minghao through his arms. “And what am I going to say, that what I said wasn’t true? I’m not going to keep lying to her about any potential she has.”

“Are you stupid?” Minghao said exasperatedly. “She thinks she’s worthless because she can’t dance. She can’t dance, that much is obvious, but she’s not worthless. You get your butt out that door and tell her that.”

Hoshi stood up again and started pacing. “If you know what to say, then why can’t you go and say it?”

“I’m not the one that just told her she wasn’t worth my time.”

Smashing his head into the floor seemed like it would be a better option. Hoshi felt terribly guilty, but apologizing to your face felt like lying to you. Agreeing to keep you on also felt like lying to you. He felt more guilty about lying to you about your dance potential than about hurting your feelings.

He still stomped out the door to try and follow you anyway. His head swirled with words that he was supposed to say, but still felt like lies meant to satisfy you temporarily. Wouldn’t it be best for you in the long run if you quit?

You really hadn’t gone far—you hadn’t even left the building. He should have known that you would have to wait for one of the trainee managers to come pick you up, and the lesson wasn’t supposed to be done for another ten minutes. You were sat on the floor in a hallway to the side of the main route to the entrance.

The light of your phone screen, too close to your face, gave you away. He could see you were staring at a message you hadn’t quite sent yet, and he could also see the drying tear tracks down your cheeks.

“You’re not worthless,” he said, and you flinched as he sat down next to you. He noticed you quickly lock your phone and hide it away from him. “I’m the worthless one if I say something like that to one of my students.”

“No, I’m just deluding myself,” you said dejectedly. “I’m not sure why I thought I could make it in this industry if I couldn’t dance.”

Hoshi scrunched his mouth as he tried to think of something to say that both made you feel better and didn’t make him feel dishonest. He kind of agreed with what you said, but he couldn’t say that. “Dancing isn’t everything,” he shrugged. “Half the trainees these days only know how to dance, and they can’t hardly hold a pitch.”

“At least they can learn to rap. There’s no replacement for dancing.”

You needed to stop saying things that were true, or Hoshi was going to have to leave you in your misery. He gulped. “You have your visual going for you, at least, right?” he tried.

That was a weird thing to say, apparently. You looked at him like he had said that summer wasn’t hot enough. “I’m not supposed to be a visual.”

He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Could have fooled me,” he said as nonchalantly as he could.

That was weird. He definitely thought you were supposed to be a visual, maybe even above vocals. Now that he tried to remember why he thought that, he realized no one had told him—he’d just assumed. It wasn’t personal bias, was it?

“Maybe you should just switch companies,” he suggested. “But you shouldn’t give up on your dream.”

“No one’s going to debut a girl band,” you said. “Or a soloist who can’t dance.”

“So why are you trying if you don’t think anyone will debut you?”

You looked away from him, in the direction he thought your phone might be. “That’s what I’m asking myself, too.” He didn’t say anything, and you waited long enough to feel awkward if you didn’t keep talking. “Why can’t I just give up and move on?”

—

“It’s too tragic, Minghao,” Hoshi lamented from the floor of the studio. “Who ever said you had to dance to be a good musician?”

“Public opinion,” Minghao answered succinctly, scrolling through his phone from the chair in the corner.

“And that’s the only thing that matters?”

“Uh, yeah.” Minghao blew a stray hair out of his face, not looking up from his phone. “That’s kind of the whole point of the entertainment industry.”

Hoshi turned onto his back, now spread-eagle. “That’s dumb.”

“And? What are you going to do about it?”

What was Hoshi going to do about it? He couldn’t do anything about public opinion, he couldn’t do anything about your dancing skill, and he probably couldn’t do anything about your company’s opinion, either. There wasn’t really anything he could do.

Hoshi took too long to answer, so Minghao finally glanced up from his phone to see him staring at the ceiling thoughtfully. “Are we dropping her? Are we keeping her on? Are we going to try and convince her people to let her go in a different direction?”

“Have you ever thought about teaching a ballroom dance class?”

Minghao actually set his phone down out of sheer confusion. He blinked and shook his head, sure he hadn’t just heard what he thought he’d heard. “Excuse me?”

“I mean, it’s not like it’s going to actually help, but it might be a fun way to pass the time until she makes her decision.” He paused. “Or the company makes it for her.”

“I’m still stuck on the last thing you said—ballroom?” Minghao asked incredulously, sitting forward. “You’re not actually thinking about ballroom.”

Hoshi shrugged and looked at Minghao from the floor, upside-down. “It’s more fun than trying not to pop a blood vessel every week.”

“We’re a K-pop dance studio,” Minghao said. “What is her company going to say when they find out you’ve been teaching her ballroom?”

“At least it’s something,” Hoshi replied, flipping back onto his stomach. “And at least I can lead.”

—

You were used to Hoshi touching you to correct your position, but not like this. It wasn’t even that he was too close because there was actually a considerable amount of space between the two of you and he had probably been closer before. This just felt so…intimate.

His hand was on your waist, your hand was on his shoulder, and your other hand was held in the air by his. You had only seen this stuff in western period dramas and cartoons. Only when you did it, you didn’t really feel like high society in your sweatpants.

“Feet together,” he instructed, modeling for you. “I’m going to teach you a box step.”

You put your feet together, tapping the rubber sides of your shoes together. “Like a jazz square?”

“No. Well, maybe. Yes, but not really.” He let go of your hand momentarily to fix his hair. “Don’t worry about it. First, you’re going to step back when I step forward.”

He picked your hand back up from where you let it drop to your side. He moved his left foot forward, so you moved your left foot backward.

“Nope, try again. Like a mirror,” he said. “My left foot, your right foot.

You reset to try again. He stepped forward with his left foot, and you moved your right foot back. He froze, so you didn’t make another move.

“Good! Next, move your left foot down so it’s level with your right foot, but shoulder-width apart.”

“Huh?”

He swept his right foot up in an arc to its next place. “Like that, but back. Make your feet mirror mine.”

You tried to follow his fancy arc, but you must have curved it the wrong way. It felt awkward, even though your feet ended up in the right place. “That can’t be right,” you worried.

“Hmm, not quite,” he agreed. He let go of your hand and your waist, so you took your hand off his shoulder. He stood next to you, his hands still up as if you were across from him. “Copy me.” He stepped his right foot back. “One.”

You left your arms down and stepped your right foot back. “One.”

“No, no, keep your arms up. One,” he said, demonstrating the first step again.

Fighting back a sigh, you held your arms up as instructed and took another step back. “One.”

“Good, now two,” he said, sweeping his left foot back and across.

This time, the curve of the path felt much more natural. “Two.”

“See? Not so hard,” he encouraged. He picked up his right foot and placed it down next to his left foot. “Three.”

You copied him once more. “Three.”

“Okay, great! That was the first half,” he explained. “The second half is the same, but forward.”

You scrunched your eyebrows, watching both your feet and his. “Right foot forward?”

“Mirrored and forward,” he corrected himself. “It’s called a box step because we make a box with our steps. Left foot forward—one.”

“One,” you repeated, setting your left foot in front of you heavily.

“Keep your arms up,” he reminded you, pushing your elbow back up.

“What’s the point if you’re not even there?”

“To keep proper form. Now right foot up and shoulder length apart for two.”

You stomped your right foot up. “Two.”

“Stay light on your feet; it’ll help you move. Then feet together again for three.”

Much lighter, you brought your left foot back over. “Three.”

“And that’s the other half. Easy, right?” He looked at you expectantly.

You returned his smile with a grimace. “Simple and easy are different.”

To your surprise, he laughed at that. As in, it seemed genuine and not forced. “Alright, touché. Let’s try it a couple more times side by side and then we can try it together?” he suggested.

It was hard not to accept with his enthusiasm back up like the first few times he had taught you. Maybe he was like this because he had to care much less about your performance and more about making sure you had fun.

You mirrored him a few more times through the steps, with less separation between the steps every time. Just when you felt like you had it, he decided it was time for you to dance together again. You could already feel the six steps shuffling their order in your mind.

Once again, his right hand was on your waist, your left hand was on his shoulder, and your other hands were intertwined. There was a respectable distance between the two of you, still, but it felt like this was the closest you had ever been. Your heart was pounding in your ears, and you sure hoped he couldn’t hear it.

“Go ahead and watch your feet if you have to, but just for now,” he warned you. “You’re going to have to look up sooner or later.”

You snapped your head up faster than you could think. “At what?”

“At me.”

The actual distance between you might not have changed, but boy, oh boy, did it feel like it shrank to almost nothing.

He must have felt it, too, by the way his ears started to flush pink. “I mean, traditionally, you look at your partner in ballroom dance,” he clarified unconvincingly.

You nodded, deciding to believe him rather than make this any worse than it was for you.

“Ready?” he asked. You nodded again. “Okay, I start forward with my left foot, and you…” He picked up his left foot and froze, waiting for your move.

If he was going to step forward, you would have to move if you didn’t want him to step on your toes. “I step back with my right foot.” You took the step, and he followed through with his.

“Next?”

“I move my left foot to the other corner?” You weren’t guessing, but you still marked uncertainty in your tone.

“Good—let’s try it.” His foot followed yours up to the next point. “Excellent. And then?”

“Feet together.” You didn’t wait for him to confirm this time, but he still moved in time with you. “And then…left foot forward.” It was like his foot moving backward pulled yours forward into place. “Right foot up…and feet together again.”

“That’s it! Keep going.”

You could start to see what he meant by leading and following. You were moving at the same time, but it was a bit like your feet were attached with strings and dowel rods. As you stopped narrating each step, he began to count softly and bounce into each step.

“One, two, three, one, two, three—see how you can shift your weight and make it smoother?” he interrupted himself. “Try to keep the weight on the balls of your feet.”

You were taken aback at how simple the change was, but how much more elegant it made you feel. He kept counting softly, and it felt natural when he started leading you to turn a bit with each step.

He did stop you after a few more rounds, but for once, it wasn’t to point out a mistake in frustration. It was instead to congratulate you on your success.

“Shall we try with some music?”

“Is it going to be fast?”

“Not much faster than we’ve already been doing,” he reassured you. “It’s not a hard dance to speed up, though.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” you snickered. “You literally dance for a living.”

“No, I teach dance for a living. Big difference,” he emphasized jokingly. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and a few moments later, some music came over the speakers. “Which means that I know you won’t have a hard time with this. Ready?”

Tuning into the music, you started to count in your head. Hoshi was right—it wasn’t that much faster than you had already practiced. It might have even been a little slower.

“For once, I think I might be.” You straightened your back, but you kept your eyes on your feet.

“Excellent! I’ll count us off. Which foot first?” he quizzed you.

“Um…” You went over it in your head. “My right, your left.”

“And you didn’t even phrase it as a question this time,” he said, genuinely praising you. “Ready? One, two, three, ready, set, go!”

It felt like magic. Really, it did. For the first time in your life, you were moving in rhythm with the music, and combined with the music, you were understanding how the two worked together for the first time, too. Eyes on your feet, it really almost felt effortless.

It felt even more like a period drama now, and you felt a little more like you belonged.

“It’s fun, isn’t it?” Hoshi commented.

“I can’t believe I’m actually doing it,” you agreed.

“What if you try to look up now?”

You hesitated. “I don’t know. I think the only reason this is working is because I can see my feet.”

“Just try,” he encouraged you. “Trust your feet for a second.”

You glanced up and back down, and then raised your head. Earlier he said you were supposed to look up at him, right? You could try.

So you looked up and found his face right in front of yours.

Funnily enough, he was right in telling you to trust your feet; they kept moving in the correct pattern even though your brain was totally short-circuiting. You felt close enough to count all his eyelashes, which was easier with his eyes widened like that.

He was surprised, too—he wasn’t expecting your proximity to shrink like that. However, he kept moving just as you did, too stunned to break eye contact or try to widen the gap.

Minghao dropped something on the floor in his corner, snapping you out of your trance. Hoshi glanced over your shoulder to see what was up, but his eyes were back on you in record time.

You cleared your throat as your senses were returned to you. “I’ll just…look at the wall or something,” you mumbled, trying to look like you were absentmindedly staring over his shoulder rather than fixating your gaze purposefully away from him.

“No, you don’t have to do that,” he tried to brush you off casually. “That was my fault. I promise it’s not as awkward if we’re talking.”

So he was admitting that just happened, and it was awkward. Cool.

Your eyes flickered back over to meet his, which were now much more relaxed, but you ultimately stayed looking away from him. “Are you sure?”

He nodded in one fluid, dramatic motion. “Promise.”

Once again, he was right. He didn’t make you look at him right away, but once he started talking to you, asking about your instrument, what you liked about making music, how your grades were in high school, the makeup products you used, even the color of your toothbrush (what?), it was natural to look at him. The distance didn’t grow back, really, but it became comfortable.

After a while, and probably more than a couple songs worth of talking, he stopped you. “One more thing we’ll practice today,” he introduced.

“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” you asked suspiciously.

Minghao snorted from the corner. “Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” he asked himself in a voice that he only meant for himself to hear.

“No more bad feelings!” Hoshi demanded. “You already learned to waltz, so let’s just add a little trick. I’ll teach you how to spin.”

Minghao narrowed his eyes at the two of you. He glanced at the clock and decided that while, sure, there was enough time to teach you this, it wasn’t part of the original lesson plan. He was right about the bad feeling. Hoshi didn’t look at just anyone like that.

#headcanon (i say as it's my story that i wrote) but i like to think she debuts as a soloist with a specialty in ballroom-style choreography #or hoshi starts a social media something and has a series called teaching my girlfriend how to dance and they just giggle the whole time #seventeen #hoshi #svt #hoshi x reader #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #kwon soonyoung #svt hoshi #seventeen hoshi #hoshi seventeen #hoshi svt #svt soonyoung #soonyoung x reader

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daemour · 10 months

Text

Answer (1/2)

Pairing: ghost!Seonghwa x Reader ft. future San

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Ghost AU, Mystery, Supernatural elements, vaguely horror

Warnings: Religious content, toxic possessiveness, slight yandere, mentions of death, death

Word count (part specific): 1228

Summary: For as long as Seonghwa had been roaming the world as a ghost, he hadn’t remembered much of his life when he was... well... living. But one thing he does remember is you. His childhood friend whom he hadn’t seen since he moved in primary school. So naturally, he seeks you out.

To his surprise, you can see him. He immediately decides to hold onto you for as long as he can. After all, you’re the only tie he has to the living world. He doesn’t want anything to get in the way of what could be a normal life.

Not even your potential partners.

im sorry this took so long T-T it's for @flurrys-creativity's 666 Milestone Collab but I totally lost all motivation and didn't even know how to finish this. The second part comes out next week (6/23)!

Part 1 - Part 2

“So….you’re like…dead?” You look so confused and Seonghwa honestly finds it adorable.

“(Y/N), dear, when you first saw me I was floating a foot in the air. I am currently transparent. What more could you ask?” You roll your eyes and attempt to smack Seonghwa, but again, he is a ghost and your hand just passes through him. “See, even more evidence!” He can’t help but tease you. The look on your face is worth it.

“You are so not funny, Seonghwa,” you hiss, frowning at him. “I haven’t seen you since we were in primary, and now you’re just dead?”

“Sorry, sorry,” there’s still a laugh in Seonghwa’s voice, but he stops teasing you. “I died, yes. I don’t really remember how, but all I knew were fragmented memories…and your face was in most of them. So I decided to find you, and lo and behold! You can see me.”

Your eyebrows furrow and for a moment Seonghwa worries that he might make you cry. “That’s so sad. I’m sorry,” you frown at Seonghwa and he waves his hand as if trying to brush away your pity.

“Don’t worry about it. I get to see you again anyways, so it’s not too bad,” he jokes to lighten the atmosphere. “How is it, being an adult? You’re getting so old.”

His attempt works for the most part, although you’ve still got sadness in your eyes. “Shut up, you’re only a couple years older than me.” You attempt to shove him again, and this time Seonghwa lets himself materialise just a bit more so that you can make contact, and he falls onto his side with a giggle.

“That wasn’t very nice, (Y/N)! I am just trying to inquire about your life.” Seonghwa pouts and you roll your eyes at the sight.

“Life is good, I guess. My parents don’t live here anymore, but they let me stay since they paid off the mortgage and it’s closer to my university. I just pay the utilities myself,” you hum. “What else, what else. I’m going to community college to get my gen-eds done…and I think that’s about all.”

“Oh, where are your parents now?” Seonghwa asks. “They were always so nice to me. At least no one will think you’re crazy for talking to ghost me.” He nudges you a little and you slap his elbow away.

“Oh, shut up, I probably am a little crazy if I can see you,” you say lightheartedly, and Seonghwa can’t lie—those words stung. “But they moved in with my maternal grand-aunt. She’s been having health issues. And my mom loves it there. She practically grew up there so it’s a second home to her.”

You trail off as your phone rings, and you smile at the sight of the caller id. “Oh, I have to take this call, sorry, Hwa. It’s my partner for this project I’m doing.”

And just like that, you were out of your room and down the hall. Seonghwa watches you leave with a soft smile on his face. He missed you. And now he gets to see you again and be with you forever.

“How was school today?” When you get home from college, Seonghwa is lying on your couch. Or rather, floating above your couch because maintaining a physical form for that long is tiring. He’s the epitome of relaxed, although a little bored since he can’t leave the house for too long without you since he’s tied his spirit down.

“It was good,” you reply, setting your bookbag on the coffee table to take off your shoes. “A little boring today since all I had were an English class and a long Chem lab. How was watching YouTube?”

“Exhilarating,” Seonghwa teases, finally straightening up to float towards you and greeting you with a hug. “Snuck a little bit of Netflix in there too.”

You hum, moving into the kitchen with Seonghwa following close behind. “Sounds like a fun day. Sorry that you have to be inside a lot though…I’d take you to class but I might get distracted and look like a fool talking to you.”

Seonghwa laughs shortly, hands moving to wrap around your stomach as he peeks over your shoulder at the bowl of cold pudding you’re eating. “Is that all you’re going to eat?” is all he says in response.

“Mmh, yeah. I just came back to grab a snack but then I’ll be going to the library and will grab lunch somewhere.” You pause, turning your head to take a glance at the ghost leaning on your shoulder. “You can come along this time if you’d like? I can get a study room at the library and so we can chat or you could read.”

Seonghwa’s eyes widen. He can feel his heart lurch like it's been stabbed—it’s only now he realises how different his routine has become now that he’s died. He stays at home 90 percent of the time so he always forgets how much you have to accommodate for him to accompany you.

“I’d like to,” he mumbles out, and as if you can tell how he’s feeling, you lean into his touch as a slight comfort.

“Yeah! You’ll have to tell me all about the YouTube and the Netflix,” you joke, a smile on your lips that Seonghwa can see out of the corner of his eye. God, he’s glad he finally found you.

“Where were you?” Seonghwa asks when you come back as the sun is setting, a far cry from when you usually arrive at two in the afternoon. “I got worried.”

"Oh no, I'm so sorry Hwa!" You exclaim after a quick glance at your watch. "I totally forgot that there's no way to contact you and lost track of time. I had gotten a partner project assigned to me so we went to the library to start to plan it out. I'm sorry."

Seonghwa purses his lips but relaxes. "That's okay. I just thought you got kidnapped or hurt or something. It seems like much longer when you're just here by yourself."

You hum in understanding, offering him a small smile. "Yeah, I get that. How about we order dinner since I worried you? It'll be a treat. And we gotta figure something out about the communication."

Seonghwa sighs affectionately. "That's more like a treat for you since I technically don't need to eat, but hey, I can still taste it so I'll take it."

You roll your eyes, poking him in the side. "Don't think I didn't notice you stealing all of my pudding, Seonghwa. Don't try to play cool with me."

Seonghwa laughs, batting your hand away. "Hey, you eat too many of those anyway. I'm actually doing you a favour by keeping you from getting sick.”

You scoff. "I take great offense to that—I haven't gotten sick yet."

"Just wait." Seonghwa rolls his eyes. "And I'll laugh when that happens."

Instead of being a mature adult who will accept when you're wrong, you just start ignoring him, looking through the menus you have pinned up on a billboard. "What do you want to eat?"

"Dude, nice way to dodge that. And I really could care less. Pizza?"

"Only if we can get stuffed crust," you offer and Seonghwa laughs.

"As if I would eat it any other way."

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elementary-my-dear-daddy · 3 months

Text

Earning Your Keep

Analogical (Virgil & Logan)

This story will be a series for the sugar daddy idea i've had running around in my head for some time now lmao. I really hope you guys like it since I enjoy writing it :)

Read it on AO3!

Virgil likes to take care of those he holds close, and maybe also a stranger that offered him a ride home.

Virgil was never rich. His family was big and his parents couldn’t make very many ends meet for most of his life, leading him to work his way through school. Once he graduated with a bachelors in psychology, he picked up two jobs to start paying off his loans, one in retail which drove his mental health into the ground, and the other as a behavioral health tech at a rehab center, which only had night-shift positions open and kept him up all night. He was paid and treated like shit, and on the cusp of breaking down when he got extremely lucky. For his 27th birthday he got the usual card with a cheesy message from his grandparents, but instead of the typical twenty bucks or a gift card, he found a lottery ticket sitting neatly inside. He didn’t think much of it, handing it over to the convenience store clerk when he was picking up an energy drink before his next shift.

“I don’t think this is worth anything, but if it has anything on it can I just use it to pay for this?” Virgil put his drink on the counter while the clerk scanned the ticket.

“Woah, woah. Oh my god.”

“What?”

“Dude, you just won.”

“Huh?” Virgil knit his brow in confusion. He glanced over at the cashier’s screen, noticing the rather large number it displayed.

“Yeah, you won the jackpot! It’s over like 200 million! Holy shit! Here, sign it and take it to a lawyer!” The person handed him back the slip of paper and a pen. Virgil’s brain had short-circuited, causing him to just follow instructions. He didn’t really understand what was happening, so he just took the ticket back and walked out and back to his car, driving straight home and immediately typing ‘what to do if you win the lottery’ into his computer.

A bunch of results came up saying a bunch of stuff- tax experts, lawyers, and a bunch of steps that caused Virgil to lay down on his bed and rock back and forth for a little while. He didn’t believe this was happening to him. Maybe it wasn’t real? This was just a nightmare right? A really good bad nightmare.

All the things he saw online said not to tell anyone, but he couldn’t just sit there not making a decision. He picked up the phone and dialed the only person he knew who could possibly help him out.

~~~~~~~~~~

“You what ?” Janus’ voice hissed through the speakers on Virgil's phone, “Is this some weird joke, because it isn’t landing well.”

“No, no, I promise it's real, I-I checked and the numbers match up and I verified it at the gas station and, and-”

“Virgil, breathe. Calm down. I’m coming over so we can talk. I’ll help you get this figured out, and make sure you aren’t having delusions of grandeur.” Janus sighed, “I’ll be there in 10.”

Janus was over shortly, Virgil working with him to figure out the next course of action. Everything was going so fast. The next day Janus helped him set up meetings and accounts, and get lawyers and a budget going. The week flew by in between the contracts and calls. Even the next few months seemed to go by in a blur of bureaucratic processes.

The first thing he did was set his parents up with a decent place to live and help them with their debts and medical bills. He did the same for himself, getting his student loans paid off finally and allowing himself to move into a spacey yet cozy penthouse. He quit both his jobs, but tried to end on a good note with his boss at the clinic in case he did ever want to go back. He was, probably for the first time in his life, comfortable.

~~~~~~~~~~

Time kept passing and Virgil had to now figure out what he wanted to spend his time on. He’d picked up his passion for music again now that he could afford nice equipment, but never had the intent to go anywhere with it. He looked into some online classes he could take, just for fun and to keep his mind stimulated. He even worked with Janus and some of his lawyers to start a charity for helping disabled students with loans that didn’t have the luck that he had. That was as close to a job as he had, once they had an office set up he made a regular schedule to help sort things out with it.

The routine he made helped him adjust to his new life. Getting up, going to the office, processing applications, working on his classes and playing music. He didn’t really spend his money anymore beyond his needs. Nothing fancy brought him much happiness. He didn’t host parties or have many friends that hung out with him before he became well off. He’d tried to go on a few dates, but the people he’d seen either knew him from the news when he originally won or they’d act disinterested until he brought up his money. The one time he actually thought he’d found someone he was interested in, the guy had thrown a fit that he wanted to end their 3rd date early to not have a panic attack.

They went to a planetarium, which for the most part Virgil enjoyed, but the segment about how small of a spec the earth was in the grand scheme of the universe triggered the existentialist anxiety of dying alone and not mattering. He had to run out and go calm down, but that proved difficult with his date shouting.

“Do you know how fucking rude it is to just run out on your date? I had to pay for these tickets, you know, and they aren’t cheap!”

“I-I know, i’m sorry, I can, um, here I’ll pay you back-” Virgil started to reach for his wallet.

“Whatever, it’s fine, let’s just see if they’ll let us back in, cmon.” The guy tugged at Virgil’s arm.

“Um…Actually I was wondering if…s-sorry uh, could- could we just go home?”

“What, are you not having a nice night? You could at least not waste my time, you know.”

“I know, I'm really sorry, we should- maybe, uh… you can go and I’ll just head home and call an uber-”

“Ugh are you serious?” His date frowned, “You know what? Just go, I don’t wanna deal with this anymore. Don’t call me again, we’re done.”

He watched his date head back into the planetarium and sighed, resigning himself to a bench outside to shake off the rejection. He shivered as a spike of anxiety hit him. He had to count his breaths, but it wasn’t working. He was gonna end up alone and live a completely inconsequential life that had no impact whatsoever and-

“Are you alright?”

Virgil looked over at a man a few feet away from him. He stood tall, sporting glasses and a polo with the logo of the planetarium. Virgil didn’t couldn’t quite make out the name on the man’s name tag through his watery eyes. Oh shit, was he crying? No no no this couldn’t happen in public, he was a grown man crying in public-

“Oh, apologies, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just thought I should intervene.” The man looked at Virgil with concern, “May I sit?”

Virgil nodded, easing slightly as he did. He took a shaky breath and wiped away his tears, “I-I’m so-sor-ry. I could-n’t stay in there. S-sorry.”

“There’s no need to apologize, take as much time as you need to gather yourself.” He spoke calmly. His tone comforted Virgil enough to steady his breathing and collect his thoughts.

“I’m…I’m good. Sorry.” Virgil sighed, “Just had a shitty date.”

The man frowned, “I see. Was he your ride home?”

Virgil nodded, “Figured I’d just get a cab or something.”

“Don’t waste your money, my shift just ended. If you’re comfortable with it I’d be happy to offer you a way home.”

“No no I can’t, I mean- It’s fine it’s not like money’s the issue I just don’t wanna leave him here alone.”

“After he just left you?”

Virgil looked towards the doors of the planetarium. He slumped his shoulders in resignation, “I guess you’re right.”

“I don’t mean to intrude on your personal affairs, but he is not worth your time if he does not respect your boundaries, and I don’t feel comfortable leaving you in a potentially unsafe environment. I would feel much more assured if I knew you returned home unharmed.”

“Fuck it, ok.” Virgil sighed. He looked over at the man and was able to see him a little more clearly. His name tag attached to a Dr. Who lanyard read Logan in bold font. He looked rather lanky and had bags under his eyes comparable to Virgil’s own.

“Would you like another minute to calm down or would you like to walk with me to my car now? I don’t mind waiting.”

“Uh, no, we can go now. Th-thank you, um, Logan.” Virgil offered a half smile.

“Of course, uh…”

“Virgil.”

“Virgil.” The man- Logan, stood up and motioned for the other to follow him.

Virgil stood and accompanied him to the car. It wasn’t the fanciest thing in the world, far from it. It looked like one of the windows had been punched out and was covered with cardboard and duct tape. It looked like an older car, and when they got in Logan had to start the engine a few times before it actually got running.

“Please excuse the state of my car,” Logan said pulling his seatbelt on, “I’d fix the window on my own if I could but I’ve been too busy to do so. Here, do you mind putting your address in so I can get directions?”

Logan handed Virgil his phone, the other quickly inputting the info and handing it back. Virgil fastened his own seatbelt as they drove out of the parking lot.

“So, you work at the planetarium?”

“My shirt indicates so.”

“Right.” Virgil nodded, “What started that?”

“I needed a part-time job to work during nights while I attended college. I studied astronomy and a professor recommended applying for the position. The job just stuck after I graduated.”

“That sounds pretty cool. You get to go to all those shows, right?”

“No, I get to sit in the ticket booth.”

“Oh.” Virgil looked out the window as they drove, “I didn’t realize.”

“It's alright,” Logan said, shrugging, “I’ve seen them all anyway, when I had more free time.”

“You can’t take a day off?”

Logan’s lips pursed, “Not really. I work two other jobs.”

They both spent the rest of the ride in silence until the car approached the area where Virgil lived.

“You…live over here?” Logan questioned, looking around at the tall, well-kept buildings of the city.

“Um, yeah. I guess.” Virgil sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, “I moved here a few months ago. Doesn’t feel like it though.”

Logan hummed in acknowledgement, still looking around at how different this place seemed compared to where he lived. He pulled up to a decorative building with too many stories to count from his view. He parked the car and turned to Virgil.

“Thank you for allowing me to take you home. I’m sorry you had a rough night but hopefully you’ll find someone else that will accommodate your needs appropriately.” Logan offered a smile.

Virgil returned it, before clumsily reaching to take off his seatbelt and pull out his wallet, “Uh, here.”

He offered a wad of cash to Logan, who in return pushed it back, “No, please don’t worry about covering gas. It isn’t far from my-”

“Take it. Get your window fixed too. And if you need anything else just, um, give me a call or something. Thanks again, Logan.” Virgil said, getting out of the car and shutting the door.

Logan watched him greet the doorman (his building had a doorman?) and head to his apartment, before staring down at the cash. It added up to about $350, plus Virgil's business card. He blinked and debated trying to go after him, but decided he wouldn’t be able to find him since he didn’t know which apartment was his. He pulled out his own wallet and stuffed the cash inside. The card Virgil had given him had his name and number, along with the name of a charity Logan heard the name of a few times from the news. This was too much to process, so Logan just put the card in with the cash and drove home. That was a problem for someone much more well rested.

~~~~~~~~~~

Virgil flopped down on his bed as soon as he got home. He pulled out his phone and immediately blocked his date’s number, writing him off as just another insensitive asshole trying to take advantage of him. He let his mind relax in the safety of his home and tried to just forget about tonight. Except Logan. He couldn’t get him out of his mind.

Working two jobs had Virgil on the verge of a panic attack almost every night, he couldn’t imagine working three like Logan had. And how long had he been driving that car? Wasn’t it dangerous to drive when your engine doesn’t turn over and you don’t have a window? Those bags under his eyes, was he not sleeping well? Was the money he gave him enough to cover everything?

Virgil exhaled through his nose and flipped onto his back. These were morning problems. Or at least wake up at 3 am and worry about life problems. He glanced at his clock- 10:30. Definitely something to deal with tomorrow.

#jamming out #not safe for sanders #fics #nsfs analogical

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tomorrowusa · 5 months

Text

Nikki Haley intentionally contorts her positions in order to keep voters from knowing where she really stands.

Nobel economics laureate Paul Krugman in the New York Times had a good column about Haley this week.

So it seems worth looking at what Haley stands for. From a political point of view, one answer might be: nothing. A recent Times profile described her as having “an ability to calibrate her message to the moment.” A less euphemistic way to put this is that she seems willing to say whatever might work to her political advantage. “Flip-flopping” doesn’t really convey the sheer cynicism with which she has shifted her rhetoric and changed her positions on everything from abortion rights to immigration to whether it’s OK to try overturning a national election. And anyone hoping that she would govern as a moderate if she should somehow make it to the White House is surely delusional. Haley has never really shown a willingness to stand up to Republican extremists — and at this point the whole G.O.P. has been taken over by extremists.

We pointed out about 10 days ago that Haley is just as anti-abortion as the other GOP candidates. As president, she would appoint justices to the US Supreme Court just like the Republican justices who struck down Roe v. Wade.

She is consistently with the radical right when it comes to economics and income equality.

Haley has shown some consistency on issues of economic and fiscal policy. And what you should know is that her positions on these issues are pretty far to the right. In particular, she seems exceptionally explicit, even among would-be Republican nominees, in calling for an increase in the age at which Americans become eligible for Social Security — a bad idea that seems to be experiencing a revival.

Do you wish to end up having to support your parents because President Haley got a Republican Congress to raise the retirement age to 70?

Republicans say there's a funding gap when it comes to Social Security. But instead of raising the disproportionately low taxes paid by their billionaire donors, they want to slash benefits.

[T]he system would need additional revenue to continue paying scheduled benefits in full. But the extra revenue required would be smaller than you probably think. The most recent long-term projections from the Congressional Budget Office show Social Security outlays rising to 6.2 percent of gross domestic product in 2053 from 5.1 percent this year, not exactly an earth-shattering increase. [ ... ] Anyone who says, as Haley does, that the retirement age should rise in line with increasing life expectancy is being oblivious, perhaps willfully, to the grim inequality of modern America. Until Covid struck, average life expectancy at 65, the relevant number, was indeed rising. But these gains were concentrated among Americans with relatively high incomes. Less affluent Americans — those who depend most on Social Security — have seen little rise in life expectancy, and in some cases actual declines.

Not only would Haley not raise taxes on her billionaire buddies, she would cut them even further.

Haley, of course, wants to cut income taxes. My guess is that none of this will be relevant, that Trump will be the nominee. But if he stumbles, I would beg political reporters not to focus on Haley’s personal affect, which can seem moderate, but rather on her policies. On social issues and the fate of democracy, she appears to be a pure weather vane, turning with the political winds. On fiscal and economic policy, she’s a hard-right advocate of tax cuts for the rich and benefit cuts for the working class.

The libertarian extremist Koch network has endorsed Nikki Haley. That's further proof that she's no moderate.

Koch family-backed PAC endorses Nikki Haley for president

Nikki Haley, a onetime member of the Trump administration, is little more than a more socially acceptable version of Trump. That does not make her moderate. She is to the right of George W. Bush who appointed Samuel Alito, the architect of the Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization decision which killed Roe v. Wade, to the Supreme Court.

youtube

As Tara Setmayer indicated in that video, just saying that somebody is better than Trump is a very low bar. A snake could walk over that bar.

Don't confuse what Paul Krugman calls Nikki Haley's "personal effect" with her actual far right views. We're voting for a President, not Ms. Personality.

#nikki haley #nikki haley is no moderate #tax breaks for the filthy rich #social security #income inequality #the koch network #libertarian extremists #donald trump #nikki haley helped normalize donald trump #roe v. wade #reproductive freedom #abortion #tara setmayer #paul krugman #katie phang #gop presidential nomination #election 2024

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levyscripts · 1 month

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Happy Nine Years to Critical Role!

I unfortunately didn’t start then. I have only been here for two years. I did watch Bells Hells first episode when it aired but I struggled on watching it on my small laptop. I was given the go ahead a week before their 7th anniversary that I could have the tv weekly.

I had watched Vox Machina season 1 by then and was hooked. By March 2022 I was writing fic. It brought me joy to write Vax and Gilmote fics (yes I know what happens) i spoiled myself so I could prepare myself emotionally.

Because I fell in love with these characters, the players, and Matt. Most of them are voices of my childhood. Who remembers staying up late in 2002 to watch Naruto on Toonami or 2004 to watch Full Metal Alchemist? Remember watching Yu-Gi-Oh! Saturday mornings? Watching Recess?

Not only that but characters I loved. Gaara, Roy Mustang, Lust, Tristan (first 20 episodes), and Gretchen. Matt has been practically so much I have watched or played. So yes, I loved Nerdy Voice Actors.

I’m currently watching campaign 1 slowly. Knowing my heart is going to be ripped out in the end. Yes, Vax is my fav. This past February I got a D20 tat with two small feathers, one black outline (Vax) and the other black outline filled in with blue (Vex). I am a dice goblin even before this but seeing Laura with her dice hoard. She is the dice queen.

I was lucky last September to meet some of them at RCCC. It was such a stressful day. It was my second con ever. I have adhd and anxiety. Crowds is a big problem for me and I can’t go alone. My mom was nice enough to go with me but it only afforded me one day. She was kind enough to take a day off work.

I was stressed, nervous, and scared Because 3 out of 4 were on my dream list to meet since childhood. I was able to meet Taliesin, Liam, Laura, and Travis. My four favs!!!

Taliesin was first and he was so kind. I gave him some of the d20 stickers I designed. I don’t know if he used them but it was nice of him to tell me he just got a new bottle and had to decorate it. It made me feel good even with how scared/nervous I was to talk.

Liam I was tongue tied. I was only able to say Vax is my favorite and gave him the stickers. He thanked me but he was kind.

Laura was a sweetheart l. I was also getting a signature for my friend. He paid for it and I got it while there. She was so kind. She talked to me even though I didn’t say much. The thanked me for my stickers.

Finally I got to my final autograph, Travis. I did end up getting a selfie and I regret not doing the others because that day seems like a blur because of my stress. But travis was so kind. I told him I had been a fan since FMA 2003. He told me I was an OG fan and shook my hand in thanks. I gave him my sticker pack for him.

They all were smiles and they made my stress worth it. Because when I’m having bad days I think of CR, read fic, go look at fan art or watch episodes. Because they have created these stories and characters that inspire many of is. They give us an escape in this crazy, difficult world.

So thank you to Critical Role. You have done so much for my mental health. I hope to meet all of you again! I know there is not enough words to fully say to say how thankful I am. I just wish i got into it since the beginning.

Thank you!!!!

#critical role

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moonlit-tulip · 1 year

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Wholeheartedness, Part 2: Flinch-Elimination

Long ago, being in the presence of wasps made me very nervous. What if they stung me? The swelling would be uncomfortable, and the pain would be inconveniently distracting! This would be a bad outcome; I wanted to avoid it. Thus I would, whenever I noticed a wasp near me, stand still until it went away.

This habit caused me more inconvenience than the two wasp stings I'd received in my life up to that point ever did.

Once I noticed this, I decided: fine. Let's just go get stung by more wasps, then, until I'm inured to it and no longer freeze up when wasps are near.

And thus, having resolved this, I no longer had any need to fear the attacks of wasps. If I were to walk at full speed near one, and it were to respond by stinging me, this would be a step forward along the path to inurement, which would be an acceptable thing to gain in return for the cost in discomfort and inconvenience.

It's an old story. (One I've told before, even.) But the relevant principles don't end with wasp stings.

Currently, I do my web searches via a paid subscription service, rather than free via Google; the results are better, and with how much web-searching I do and how much money I have to spare it's a pretty solidly worthwhile deal. But they offer only a limited number of searches per month complementary with the subscription; if one exceeds that number of searches in a month—200, at my current subscription tier—one will need to either stop searching for the rest of the month or start paying 1.5 cents per search. And when I first subscribed I got very flinchy about trying not to search too much, out of fear of that extra charge. Because 1.5 cents is a cost, and surely I'd rather avoid paying that cost on any given search if I don't have to, right?

But, of course, making substantially less use of web search would be a much larger cost than an extra few dollars a month. (I am, after all, paying them money specifically for the sake of getting more out of my web-searching; searching less would run actively counter to the reasons I subscribe at all.) So I did the natural thing: I decided to deliberately search profligately until I broke the 200-search ceiling and started paying additional marginal money per search, for a couple months, until inured to that experience. It's been going great so far: I haven't yet hit the ceiling, but I sure am no longer flinching away from the searches I want to make.

Or, for a third example, this time one where I actually succeeded in exposing myself to more of the flinch-inducing thing: water bills. I used to flinch away from drinking water, because I knew it'd add on the margins to my house's water bills. This was doing me more harm than good. So I took a few extra baths, compared with what I'd otherwise have taken—together summing up to an amount of water-use that my drinking rates would have taken weeks or months to sum up to, since a bathtub's worth of water is in fact A Lot—and I observed that no great financial disaster ensued as a result, and that was the end of my flinching-from-drinking-water.

Backing off and generalizing, now: sometimes, there are inconveniences whose possibility I flinch from, where the flinches cost far more than the cost of just enduring the inconveniences occasionally. And, under those circumstances, it can often be useful to deliberately overcompensate against the flinch response. To try, not just to suppress the flinch response in each individual instance (which tends to be an attention-demanding and difficult process), but to actively toss myself at the flinch-inducing thing until I'm so thoroughly inured to it that it ceases to produce flinch-responses-in-need-of-suppression in the first place. As long as I'm tossing myself in that direction, the tossing overrides the flinch response. Once I've succeeded sufficiently in the tossing, inurement will override the flinch response. And thus the mental overhead of needing to suppress the response will be eliminated, to my benefit as long as I was correct in my choice of what flinch response to get rid of in the first place.

Because intuitively-appealing steps to avoiding inconveniences can be more inconvenient than the inconveniences being avoided, sometimes. And it's valuable, when that happens, to be able to just stop avoiding them.

#Archive #Self-Improvement #Wholeheartedness #of course this is really a continuum rather than a binary #i no longer avoid stings from individual wasps but i still wouldn't want to get stung by dozens in quick succession #because unlike single stings i expect that that would be more inconvenient than avoiding it is!#so there's an element of careful targeting in exactly which experiences one throws oneself at for inurement-acquisition purposes #(of course as per the prior post there are only finite costs it's worth paying to get one's targeting right)#(as long as one can aim *well enough* even if some of one's moves are wrong it's still better to move more rather than less)

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rozyteaa · 11 months

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Robin and Eden

𓂃 𓈒𓏸𑁍 Psssssst! Got a click on this two! I really love the idea of them kinda meeting together and also as an alternative to meet Robin!

𓂃 𓈒𓏸𑁍 And and and! This came up when I was practicing how to... *sobs* draw Eden (so many failed attemps— *sobs*) and was thinking about scars... and then about Robin having scar on their face after the dock event. The other source of inspiration is that fanart of Robin rescuing PC who already got Stockholm Syndrome from Eden. I'm trying to find it but I can'tAAAAAAAAA— pls tag or send me a link of it because I want to credit the author! If I remember well their PC is also a bunny...?

₊❀̥୭❛ Thank you in advance and let's get started!

PC have different soft bad-endings and most of them are being kidnapped then secluded in an area.

One is from the underground farm, one by being kidnapped by Kylar, one in asylum... and the one of many is being sold to Eden.

How Robin knew: they heard it from an orphan. Not too farfetched since the forest starts from Danube Street and one of common places that they frequent is the Soup Kitchen in Wolf Street so chances is they saw Bailey and PC!

First, if you haven't met Robin yet...

their motivation to search for you would be because you're their only friend left. To be specific, they've known you for so long and whether you two are close or not Robin cares about you.

They would think that you managed to go somewhere else and live your new life... just like the others. But that wasn't the case until they heard from an orphan that you got taken deep in the forest. This kicked their worry and started their search.

If you saved them from the dock...

They thought it isn't strange that it's not strange that you'll go disappearing to day to night and even for days. They want to believe that you will come back soon... but deep down this one in particular didn't sit right to them

Especially when the subtle air in the orphanage with whispers and glances that won't meet their eyes

Days turns to week and you're still missing. When they spotted Bailey, fear of realization dawned upon them

The caretaker would be at this point and started to put missing flyers. They may seem not care for the orphans but they do and that care stems from them money they can profit.

Robin just stood there for a while before pacing without purpose but to make their brain stimulate and think. When they spotted a couple of orphan, they approached them with so much force that it seems tackling the poor guy they first got the hand on.

With desperate voice they asked where are you, if they've seen you.

The orphan tried to separate them from the guy and with hushed voice they gave him the information: Bailey took you deep in the forest. That's all they know.

Regard of trauma or confidence %

Robin isn't a stranger by the forest. They sometimes take a stroll or have a picnic there. Being sorrounded by silence and nothing to worry about is comforting.

So trauma and confidence just changes Robin's attitude at the whole ordeal.

If trauma is still present or low confidence, Robin would try to search for you because they think they don't worth much at this point and with you in mind at their last moment would be worth it

Low or high you can say they developed an attachment to you...

No, wait. That's Kylar. Scratch that. Robin did it because they're a good person deep down and that's what they think the right thing to do so trauma and confidence were thrown out of the window and all they think is you.

Ofcourse, it also up to you, in the end, if to go back with them or not.

Probably won't take you at the orphanage first because of Bailey but another shelter so you can still move freely.

Risk is being caught being caught by Eden or Bailey. Don't think that the hunter won't break the orphans door if you disappeared. Chances are Bailey shrugging it off because... it's not their problem. They got paid and that's all that matters... Probably would use you as a hostage and demand a higher price. In most case I can see Eden is on their own

Little quick note:

You being in the refuge puts a lot of comfort to Robin that it higher their confidence. Idk. This made me think a bit of a Yandere!Robin, ahah. But let's keep them the precious bebe that they are who drink #respect juice every morning!

Anyways

If you don't go with Robin or fail at escaping...

...obviously, they'd be caught by Eden.

As soon as the hunter caugh their scent, big soundless steps made their way behind the orphan and their hand quickly grabbed for the neck and lifted them up.

Robin didn't go without a struggle and puts a bravado.

Both asserting dominance. Eden knows what they are doing and their power.

On the other side, Robin is on their desperation. It's either getting you back or going like that.

Kinda like a parallelism between Robin and Eden... If we'll add more detail to Robin's appearance after the dock, they'd probably have scars on their face. Not much but still visible.

Meanwhile Eden have many of them after years of survival in the wild. And their body differences. So it's basically a giant compared to an average person 😭

Eden, expert that they are, recognize Robin's will. They mostly see Robin like an animal protecting their family.

So, frustated and perhaps seeing a bit of themselves to Robin 🥺 , the hunter threw the orphan on the ground.

Looking down and casting shadow, they met eyes to eyes that still have grit on them

The hunter pointed at them with firmness. Then back at the forest. "Go."

Eden simply said before walking toward you, lifting you up and taking you back at the cabin.

Either Robin tries another futile fight or stay there watching you disappearing, there's can feel a strange safeness.

You were, somehow, safe with the hunter...

Doesn't mean that they've given up.

I can see Eden kinda having respect of Robin for that and Robin having bit of comfort toward Eden even though the hunter intimidate them. Both also lived like a hermit. Eden in the forest, and Robin in their room. Only goes out when they need to.

Meanwhile my headcanon of Eden's opinion to other Kylar their only see desperation and instability that won't be able to keep you safe. Sydney, despite the willingness, still lack of backbone. And Whitney, who can be possessive of their own, they simply don't like them. if Eden finds Whitney selling you off you're back in the cabin. Plus Eden doesn't like Whitney's town-vibes. The other they are chill is Alex but also finds them kinda soft, somewhere near Sydney Ú_Ù. And we don't talk about Avery.

#.rozy diary #.rozy shelf #degrees of lewdity #robin the orphan #eden the hunter

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apomaro-mellow · 3 months

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alright, i'm going to go ahead and made a rant post about this car situation just so i can get it out and put it to bed. I don't mind if yall wanna comment or whatever but after this I'm just done.

So we need to go back almost a year. My car at the time seemed to be on its last legs. There was a repair it needed that was going to cost like $1200 and I had already paid close to that amount just a few months prior for another repair. I didn't want to pay that again but was willing to save up until it was suggested that I start looking for another car.

I will give my dad props for this one and only thing. He held my hand during this process bc it was my first time. Every other car I had, had been gifted by my grandparents. This was my first time shopping for one. Now it gets interesting bc instead of just getting rid of my old car, my grandparents were going to foot the $1200 bill anyway so that my brother could get it.

I felt iffy about that situation but figured it was for the best since I'd be getting a vehicle with no problems. The problem came about when he decided to drive it around and rack up tickets while MY name was still on the title (this cause my insurance premium to shoot thru the roof but thankfully i got it fixed). I literally had to escort my brother to the DMV to sort out all the paperwork and even THEN he took forever to actually change the plates so I was STILL getting tickets on my record and I had to be the one to go and take what were still my license plates off the car.

This could have potentially been an asshole move, bc I had no idea where his new plates were, but that's not my responsibility. Lucky for him, the new plates were where? In the car, bc he never did anything with them after our DMV appointment. This all occurred in summer/fall 2023.

Then in December, he starts having problems with that car. It even stops on him a couple of times. There is talks of him getting another one. Just like me, all of his (many) previous cars were gifts from our grandparents. I should have probably said earlier but these are all USED cars. We're not getting brand new ones, but still, good condition that we've never had to pay a cent for.

It's also worth mentioning that in the like....six months my brother has had my old car he got hundreds of dollars worth of tickets. Not a single one he paid on his own. Either I took care of it bc they were in my name and he's literally gone to court for not paying, or my dad has paid. But I feel like I'm digressing.

About last week, he curses out my mom because she asks him to *checks notes* receive his infant child when his baby mama drops her off. Apparently that was disagreeable and he cursed her out on the phone, then later to her face when she got home. The part that stuck out in his rant to me was that no one in our family had ever done anything for him. I think just from what I've stated above, it's pretty obvious to see that's false.

So whyyyyyyy

Why why why

After that breakdown, my dad and grandparents thought "Let's just give him another car"?

It is exhausting to see the same thing happen again and again. But this time kind of burned me bad because he got the exact same car that I have. The one I had to shop for. The one I had to visit sellers for. The one I am currently on the hook for a $10,000 loan with like 15% interest. My mother told me this was the case but I didn't actually see the car until this morning.

Here's where I give my dad the benefit of the doubt a single time: It's a common car, dealers have a ton of them, it's probably still an attractive price range. And that's the end of it.

But what I see, is that I can do everything I was told to do: do well in school, get a degree, get a job, start building my career. And it gets me virtually the same as if I did none of those things and on top of it disrespected my parents to their faces.

Like really, why am I working so hard? If doing what I do gets me the same as a foul mouthed, lazy ass, ungrateful son who's shackin up with the most frustrating baby mama in the world then what the hell is this all for anyway?

#personal #home life #it's quite a bit #fun fact!#the baby mama is a bitch #who has gotten into a fist fight with both me and my mom :)#and my brother had the audacity to get mad #i need #to get out #of this house #just in case we're keeping score #im on my 3rd car the first 2 were three #my brother has probably had at least 2x and many and has never paid for any of them

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prose-for-hire · 2 years

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Stake your bets

Pairing: Faith x reader; Buffy x platonic!reader

Request: hi, would it be okay to request a story or maybe hc's if you prefer about dating faith and being buffy's best friend and trying to make them get along? I love your work, I hope you're not overwhelmed by all the requests you're getting

Requested by: Anon

A/N: I think we can safely say I probably was overwhelmed by my requests lol !! Sorry for the wait, love, hope this one’s okay! 💖

You and Buffy had been best friends pretty much since her first day at high school. She had sat next to you in English class and you had to borrow a pencil when yours flew across the classroom. She was the best friend you had ever had, you told each other everything and nothing was ever too much information to share between you. I mean, you had saved the world together.

You shared so many amazing memories, some good and some bad. Some absolutely terrifying.

You were so close that you could barely find one of you without the other. You basically lived at each other’s houses. Attached at the hip. You just got on, you couldn’t explain it. Even when you argued, you never feared losing her as a friend. You knew there would be nothing worth losing your friendship over. So, when you started dating Faith, you knew it would be hard for her. But you hoped that she would be happy for you at least to begin with.

You had met Faith in the same way as everyone else when she had ran in and borrowed Buffy’s stake to dust a vamp before introducing herself at the Bronze. You didn’t know what to think of her to begin with, she was obviously very attractive (and she knew about it too). She kept to herself a lot after that, she didn’t really give much away other than that she liked to party and slay.

Her I-don’t-care persona intrigued you and after a while, you found yourself becoming more and more drawn to her. It was slowly at first, you paid more attention to the little things.

How she near always avoided talking about herself seriously. How she got a kick out of helping people but hated to let it show. And the cigarette she would always treat herself to after a really good slay. Even the gum she always bought and chewed on long patrols for something to do. By this point, it had made you wonder if this habit made her lips taste of ‘Very berry’…

You had it bad. You had grown close although she always appeared to be keeping you at a distance. Until one evening, you had asked if you could come on patrol with her. To her, it appeared out of the blue, but you had been trying and failing to ask all week. By Friday, you had worked up enough courage to ask and she shrugged to show that she didn’t mind, and you tried to hide your elation as you walked beside her into the night.

You spoke about anything and everything on that patrol, savouring every time you made her laugh. Real, genuine laughter from Faith was a divine sound. Though, you would never tell her that or risk getting teased within an inch of your life. At the end of the night, you rounded a corner and without saying anything, she slid her hand into yours. She was bold, much bolder than you. You would have waited at least a year to do something as scandalous and intimate as holding her hand.

But not her. Usually, she would have pressed you against a wall and kissed you without even a second thought, but that came a little later. There was something about you that, for once in her life, made her want to take things slow. It meant something. With you. And there was no chance she was letting you go once she realised that she had you.

Your relationship turned into a very well-kept secret. Not only because Faith thought pda and being as soft as she could be with you in public would make her look weak to humans and demons alike. But mostly because by this point, Buffy was starting to get jealous. Not because she wanted to date you, not at all. But because she thought she had been replaced by Faith as your very best friend.

You had tried to balance your time between them equally, honest you had. But there was only so much time in a day and your relationship was new and you found yourself aching for Faith every moment you spent apart.

One day, you woke up by Faith’s side pressed against the soft skin of her back and you knew it was the day you wanted everyone to know about your relationship. You couldn’t describe why or what had made this day so special, it was like any other. You woke up by her side in the mid-morning glow and pressed soft kisses against her exposed shoulder to wake her up. She turned and sleepily reached for you, sighing contently in a way she never had before she started to share her bed with you.

Later that day, when you had reluctantly left your girlfriend’s side, you met up with Buffy for your usual catch up at the Espresso Pump. She told you all of the latest gossip and she passed you an unusual looking rock she had picked up on patrol (you always collected weird looking rocks and trinkets when you went out patrolling with your best friend because sometimes it could get really boring).

You eventually managed to broach the subject that had been making you nervous the entire time you had spent at the coffee shop. You knew that Buffy would never end your friendship over anything like this, but her approval and support really mattered to you. And you just wanted her and Faith to get on.

“I need to tell you something…”

“If you’re gonna tell me you’re a secret vampire I might give you a 30 second head start before I start slaying” Buffy said, a hint of a smile in her voice although she could tell you were a little uneasy. Buffy had firmly decided that she didn’t like Faith. They were too different, they never seemed to agree on anything. Especially not slaying. So you didn’t want to cause yet another argument by admitting that you were dating.

But you couldn’t keep it from your best friend. You had kept exactly three secrets from her before this one and all led to a near-death experience (on your part). So you had learned the hard way to trust her with even your darkest secrets.

“No, it’s, well… me and Faith. We’re together. I think I might love her, actually” You said softly. She had never seen you like this, you had relationships in the past. Good ones, even. But never one like this. Where you had fallen so deeply and so willingly for someone. For your Faith.

“You’ve got to be kidding, the Emo slayer? She-who-must-not-be-tamed?”

“Please, just, hear me out before you start the name calling. What are you, seven?”

“One word: why?”

After a long conversation, that went off on several tangents and consisted of one shared cry and a long hug, you and Buffy were on good terms. You didn’t like keeping things from her and she admitted her own secrets she had been withholding too. Things went back to normal between you and Buffy and were even better between you and Faith. It told your lover that she mattered to you, that you wanted everyone to know that you were with her.

“I told her”

“Yeah? You actually want people to know about us then, huh?” she said this as if she assumed you might be embarrassed to love someone like her. But that could never be true.

“Faith, I love you. I would announce it to the world if I could” you insisted, taking her hand in yours and pressing a delicate kiss to the back of her hand. You swore you saw her blush as she pulled you into her, her lips meeting yours in a way that it never had. It was her way of telling you that she loved you back. She wasn’t quite able to say the words yet, but you knew instantly from the sensitive graze of her lips against yours that she had never felt anything more.

However, it took a good, long while to get Buffy and Faith back in the same room without them both exchanging some kind of snide comment. They were both intensely jealous people, though neither would admit it. But they both cared for you even more so and eventually, came around to trying to get on. For you.

Luckily, you were a person with a plan. In fact, you had made a list. Ten pages long (front and back) of ways you were going to convince them that they should both get along. Some of the most ridiculous ideas included hiring a paid vampire to try and attack them whilst also helping them bond as well as telling them that there was an ancient prophecy that the slayers had to like each other or the world could end.

You chose game night as your first activity. Which, in hindsight was probably not your best idea on the list as it brought with it a big element of competition. Something you could have done without. You had chosen Monopoly at first but there had been a creative interpretation of the rules by both of the slayers and so you had to call the end and pretend it was a draw to save each of them from ripping the other’s head off.

When you settled on poker, after Faith took out some matches to use after Buffy said she didn’t want to use real money. You had been on a losing streak for most of the night and you had been teased twice that it was a good job you weren’t playing strip poker. Something Faith quickly added she wouldn’t want to do with Buffy even if she paid her.

But suddenly, you started to win. Just a few games at first but you got better as the night went on. As did the mood between Buffy and Faith. They were civil, at least, and that was all you could really ask for.

Eventually, you realised that they were letting you win. Not only that, but they had silently agreed on this while you weren’t paying attention. They didn’t like that little droopy look you did when you realised you lost. They did a good job of letting you lose just enough times that you really could have been winning by your own skill. But you had seen glances of their cards every now and again and saw they weren’t playing their best hands.

You never called them out though, you didn’t let on that you knew because they had found a way to work together. To get on even if they weren’t as close with each other as you were with them both. Perhaps they never would be, but what made you glow was that they were at least making an effort. For you.

You ended up having regular game nights to unwind whenever there was no heavy slayer patrol needed, you leaned against Faith, lacing your hands with hers. She accused you of looking at her cards but never moved from the comfort of your touch. Buffy pretended to gag at the proximity you shared but you could see the way the corners of her mouth twitched into a slight smile. She had never seen you so happy and it was truly all she wanted for you. To be your happiest.

It actually went well for a while, you could be yourself around these women and you loved them both dearly, in different ways. You spent most of your time with your best friend and your girlfriend and found yourself having fun.

That was, of course, until Buffy found out about Faith and the Mayor…

#Faith x reader #Faith lehane x reader #Faith x you #Faith lehane x you #btvs #btvs imagine #btvs x you #Buffy The Vampire Slayer #buffy the vampire slayer imagines #btvs x reader #Buffy summers #Buffy summers x reader #fluff #faith lehane imagine #faith imagine #x reader #gender neutral #gn reader #buffy

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horrorlove14 · 1 year

Text

She Changes The Weather - Tokyo Revengers

Pairing: Timeskip! Kokonoi Haijime x Wife! Reader

She takes my time,

She grows the flowers in my mind,

She makes it shine in my mood.

Hajime vividly remembered the very first day when he met his beloved wife, Y/N at a Chinese restaurant he frequently goes to with his friends and fellow gang members where she was a hostess dressed in a beautiful qipao as her work uniform.

He fell in love with her at first sight after being greeted by her which left him bewitched by her soft beauty, kindness and professionalism at her job.

Once he was done with his meal and paid his bill, he went up to her to give her his business card telling her to give him a call sometime later as he looked forward to meeting with her again.

She makes me trip,

The words just fall out of my lips,

And I forgot how to lie.

They started to talk to each other frequently outside of work through phone calls, text messages and video calls.

He fell in love more and more with her as they were getting to know each other as time goes on.

One day, he decided to ask her out on a date to a fancy restaurant that she accepted which made him happy, knowing that he was going to spoil her on this date.

A song reminds me

As I track my life

It's easy as 369, 369

On this date, Hajime was dressed up in his most expensive designer suit and Y/N was dressed in her only nicest cocktail dress that she got as a birthday present from her family long ago.

Hajime was smitten by her appearance and acted like a true gentleman throughout the whole date when he let her order anything she wants from the menu, paid for their bill and took her home in his fancy car.

Once they reached her home, she thanked him for the wonderful date and bids farewell but she could leave, Hajime grabbed her wrist and turned her around to face him before leaning forward to kiss her on the lips which caught her by surprise but kissed him back.

He declared his feelings towards her with sincerity that made her blush uncontrollably because she never had anyone confess to her in such a bold manner.

Long story short, she accepted his confession and they became a couple as a result.

Seen it all, but I've seen nothing yet,

Cause I forget

Do I know or do I think I know?

It's so weird,

It's so clear

Throughout the whole relationship, Hajime spoiled Y/N with everything her heart desired, even though she appreciated it but she does have to tell him on occasion to let her pay for her things at times as she didn't want to be seen as a gold-digger who's after his money.

They end up living together at his luxury penthouse in Tokyo where she can commute to work more easily than her previous home which was an apartment.

He contemplates his future with Y/N because he feels blessed every single day to have her in his life because she's like the sun who could brighten up a bad day wherever she goes.

She takes my time, but I don't mind

She makes me feel like

Like I can see for miles.

He decided that he was going to propose to her because he couldn't see his life without her since he sees her as a priceless treasure worth more than precious jewels or designer goods in the world.

He gets an engagement ring with their initials engraved on it along with a beautiful diamond.

He proposed to Y/N during a vacation when they both got time off from their jobs to spend a week together because they had been very busy with work.

She changes the weather in my world,

Seems like it's never getting cold.

Their wedding took place at a luxury hotel where Hajime had Inui as his best man and his fellow friends/ gang members as his groomsmen.

He cried his eyes out from sheer happiness after seeing his beloved Y/N walking down the aisle with his father-in-law in a stunning wedding dress.

After the wedding, the newlyweds went on their honeymoon overseas where they spent every moment together basking in the fact that they're officially husband and wife for the rest of their lives.

It's okay,

It's not obvious,

Cause what you say will make my day

Rid of consequence

It's so weird

But it's so clear

After the honeymoon, life was back to normal for a couple of months until Y/N discover that she is pregnant after experiencing morning sickness and taking a pregnancy test in the bathroom.

She takes a selfie with the positive pregnancy test and sends it to Haijime on her phone with a cute message, expressing excitement about them becoming parents with a brand new family member joining them in 9 months.

Of course, he's over the moon about it and started looking up baby essentials and clothing because he couldn't contain himself over the news of becoming a father and starting a family with his wife by his side.

She takes my time, but I don't mind

She makes me feel like

Like I can see for miles.

She changes the weather in my world,

Seems like we're never getting old.

Throughout the whole pregnancy, Hajime would attend every doctor's appointment with Y/N regardless of his work schedule because he wants to be there to see the growth of their unborn child.

They discovered that they will be having a boy, and they would write a list of names for their son and find out by feeling a kick from him in the womb once they'd suggested the name, Ichiro.

Y/N is thankful to her husband for being so attentive, sweet and caring towards her and their unborn son, Ichiro because she feels so lucky to have him by her side.

She takes my time, but I don't mind

She makes me feel like

Like I can see for miles.

She changes the weather in my world,

Seems like it's never getting cold.

Baby Ichiro was finally born after Y/N went into labour for about 25 hours after her water broke on a weekday when she was out doing some shopping with her friends who managed to call an ambulance and Hajime.

He was there to witness the birth and got his hand crushed by it being held so tightly but didn't say anything because her well-being was much more important than his hand.

The new parents are ecstatic over the arrival of their son, Ichiro and couldn't wait to bring him home where everything is all set up for him to get settled.

Their friends and family are excited to meet the baby during their visit and they took turns holding him in their arms and taking photos to brag about his cuteness.

Hajime and Y/N look forward to creating memories with Ichiro and considering the idea of giving him a new brother or sister around a couple of years or so in the future.

----------------------------------------------------

End of song fic. Likes and reblogs are very much appreciated.

First fanfiction of the year so please enjoy. More fanfiction is coming this way for this year.

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