#got my maths exam tomorrow and i need a 6 to pass

[11queensupreme11]

My day absolutely sucked today! Firstly my hair looked like ass than NONE of my friends in my class were there so I was a loner is my classes than I had this dutch test (I'm Dutch) but we only had 30 minutes and I really needed to do good because on my last Dutch test i had a 4,8/10. Than I had pysichs (don't know how to spell it) and that felled like 5 hours (thank god for my AirPods. I also goth two grades back both 5,5/10 for the pre exams thing I told you about. BUT my mother is really strict in my school so everything under a 6/10 she sees as failed so I was really scared to tell her about it and also the other two subject I really failed.

Than like a hour ago my mom finds out about my my grades and she got really mad (like you always got good grades when you were younger!) and than my dad also got mad so I cried (in my room hell no I'm gonna cry in front of people) and tomorrow I have another test and I'm scared to fail that one.

And the thing that gets me mad about that is that I'm almost always top of my class but they don't care about that no they only care when I do one bad thing so now if I get a bad grade myself I don't even care about it I just get scared how they will react. And than they tell because I'm so "privileged" they will take away things like my phone and tv.

Sorry for the vent I just wanted to tell all this to people I don't really know and stuff you don't have to post this I don't really care but if you do post it please tell me if I'm overreacting on the last part

you definitely were NOT overreacting in the last part. it honestly seems like ur being pressured by your parents tbh, im so sorry

also, i HATE IT when parents pull the "you always got good grades when you were a younger" bs ughhhhh

there is a VERY big difference between coursework when you were a lil kid and coursework when ur in high school or college (im assuming ur in high school?)

OF COURSE the stuff you're learning is gonna get harder as you move up a grade, OF COURSE, ur grades aren't gonna be the same as it was when you were a lil kid, WE WERE DOING BASIC MATH AND HAD LIKE, FOUR FUCKING SUBJECTS TO FOCUS ON unlike now where our math now has letters and we got 6+ subjects to study and do assignments for (on top of working or other extracurriculars we got).

it irks me so much when they start comparing your school performance from when you were a kid, cuz like duh?? ofc things are gonna change, use ur brain dumbo!!!

i am so sorry that ur stressing out over ur exams and the fact that ur parents aren't making things easier.... i hope this week passes smoothly for you and you can take a break from everything soon 💖

#👸🏻| asks

[plasticsandwich]

babygirl i know numbers you've never even heard of

#got my maths exam tomorrow and i need a 6 to pass #wish me luck dmmd #i say tomorrow but its in less than 5 hours #diary

[2manyfandoms2count]

I love you (not) - Chapter 9

Tackling two prompts of @marichatmay again ('take a break' and 'cuddles'), it's probably not going to help much with catching up on the schedule but it's okay.

We are now a little over a third into the story, and... Are those real feelings that are emerging in the fake relationship? Perhaps... Still quite a bit of oblivious dumbassery to go, though, else it wouldn't be fun :D Hope you enjoy!

First | Previous | AO3 | Next

---

Chapter 9: In which Marinette gets mixed up in her checklist

"I'm sure I'm missing something…" Marinette mumbled as she read through her extensive to-do list of the day, tapping her pencil against her chin.

School

HomeworkFrench: Dissertation Maths: exercises 5,9,12 p.132 Science: Lab report English: Act III, scene 1 Hamlet History: revision test Extra last minute?

ALYA’S BIRTHDAY PREP: coordinate surprise party + finish gift

Kitty section: costume prototype for single 2

Art project: finish dress

Picnic Alya, Nino, Adrien

“I swear there was a seventh thing I needed to do today.” She squinted, scanning her surroundings in the hopes that it would jog her memory. There was so much going on these days that things kept piling up, but today she was determined to catch up with everything. She didn’t have much of a choice, anyway; most of the items on her list had a set deadline, and it was coming at her faster than she liked. She preferred not to get hit by the truck head on.

Her eyes landed on Chat Noir’s blanket, which she’d draped over the back of her chaise after he’d left on the night of his birthday, over a week before.

“Right! Chat Noir - Ask Chat Noir to take a break, ” she mumbled, scribbling down the last point, before setting the list down next to her computer keyboard. She'd abandoned the idea of full on breaking up with him given how their relationship was dragging on; a break seemed softer to ask for first, and it could easily be followed up by a breakup.

It was going to be a long day, but with a bit of rigour, and thanks to her early start, it would all work out.

“Don’t you think that’s a bit much for one day, Marinette?” Tikki peeked over her shoulder, letting out a small yawn.

“Well, maybe for a normal girl, but not for Ladybug.” She yawned reflexively, and her kwami shot her a pointed look. “I know, I know. I have to power through, though - it’s not my fault I got sidetracked so much these past few days. I honestly wonder what Hawkmoth does as a living, the man has too much time on his hands.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to get a tiny bit more sleep? To help with your productivity?” Her Kwami asked, looking slightly worriedly at the bags beneath her eyes.

“It’s 6am, Tikki, not the crack of dawn. I’ll have to be up by the time I fall back asleep again.” She waved her concern away. “I’ll just let the stress adrenaline work its magic. It’s going to be fine, don’t worry.” Tikki pouted doubtfully. “Now, would you mind reading me the Hamlet scene while I finish sewing up my project?”

---

This is a disaster , Marinette thought as the formulae she read on the page danced in front of her eyes. It didn’t matter how many times she went through them, they just didn’t compute.

She looked at the time: 6:45pm. She had fifteen minutes before her picnic, and she had to finish her maths homework, her dissertation, her History revision, the Kitty section prototype, and send out individual messages to remind everybody of their tasks for Alya’s birthday so it wasn’t too short notice for the weekend.

She tried to ignore the palpitations of her heart; maybe she’d overdone it on the coffee during the day. It wasn’t like she had a choice, anyway.

She’d discovered as she'd walked into class that she had a class president meeting with Mr. Damocles over her lunch break, which had been when she’d planned to squeeze in some of her work.

Then, while she’d been packing her bag at the end of her classes, ready to leave, an Akuma had emerged. It had been a tricky one, too; Chat and her had spent about an hour chasing it around Paris before finally catching it.

Adding to that the fact that her 6am rising had left her exhausted by the second period of the day, she really hadn’t been the most efficient anyway.

“I think you know what you need to do, Marinette,” Tikki said apologetically, as if reading her mind, floating up to her with her phone in her flippers. Alya’s number was already dialled on the screen.

Marinette sighed and took the phone from her, pressing the green button before lodging it between her shoulder and her ear.

“Hey girl!” Alya’s excited voice sounded on the other end of the line. “Nearly ready to go? We really picked the right night for a picnic; the weather’s super nice.”

“About that…” Marinette winced. “I’m so sorry, I won’t be able to make it.”

“You’re kidding, right? You ’re passing up on an opportunity to have a picnic with Adrien? Are you ill?” Alya said after a small beat.

“Trust me, I surprised myself.” Marinette pinched the bridge of her nose. “I just feel like I have a bit too much on my plate right now, and I wouldn’t be great company if I came. I hope we can find another time to go out again, but I think studying and going to bed early is what’s best.”

“It’s true that you’ve seemed kind of out of it lately,” Alya said compassionately. “Don’t worry about us, take care of yourself! I promise I’ll take loads of pictures, it’ll be like you were here. And I’ll bully Mr Agreste with you after our exams to get Adrien out again if needed.”

“Thanks for understanding Alya.” Marinette smiled.

“That’s what best friends are for!” She could almost see her wink. “Now, get back to work and then go to bed! We’ll see you tomorrow.”

There was a bit of chatter on the line before Alya hung up, as she met up with Adrien and Nino.

“Wait, Marinette isn’t coming?” Adrien’s almost disappointed voice was the last thing Marinette heard before the communication ceased.

She found herself quite immune to it. She decided not to dwell on it.

---

Adrien enjoyed the picnic very much, as he did any opportunity to hang out with his friends, but his eyes kept drifting to the empty space next to him, where Marinette would undoubtedly have been sitting, were she with them. He hoped she was alright; Alya had told him that the reason why she wasn’t coming was because she was studying, which was fair considering the amount of homework they’d been given in the past few weeks, but he did feel like she was overworking herself a bit.

He didn’t doubt her ability to take on all of her projects, but he wished she’d slow down a little, for the sake of her health. What would he do if his everyday Ladybug burned out?

He wondered what Alya’s curious gaze meant when he voiced his thoughts about the situation. He panicked a little when she said that maybe a boyfriend could help get her mind off of work - firstly, because Marinette technically had a boyfriend, which he was surprised Alya of all people didn’t know. He thought the two girls told each other everything. Was Marinette keeping their relationship a secret on purpose? Was she confused about their status, which, he had to admit, he wasn't sure was himself? Was she (the thought scared him) ashamed of him?

Secondly, he found his heart squeeze peculiarly at the thought of Marinette having a boyfriend other than him . He decided not to dwell on it.

He couldn’t help but take the long way home, passing at the bottom of her building, after the picnic, though. And, seeing that there was still light in her room at past 11pm, he decided that he should probably do something; for her well being, not as an excuse to see her, of course.

He transformed in a back alley, then extended his baton so he could peek through the window closest to her desk. Maybe she was already asleep, but had forgotten to turn her lights off.

The sight of her bent over a sheet of paper, hands buried in her hair as if ready to tear it out of her scalp made him knock.

Marinette jumped at the unexpected sound, and looked up, looking quite haggard. Her features softened when her eyes met his.

There was a hint of a smile on her lips as she opened the window. “Hey Chat, what are you doing here?” She yawned.

“Bedtime patrol, just making sure that citizens are going to bed at a reasonable time,” he smiled, stifling his own yawn.

“That’s nice of you. But, does that mean that I’m in trouble?” she drawled out, leaning forward to boop him on the nose. Her exhaustion was clouding her better judgement.

“Depends, are you nearly done with your studying?”

“When will I ever be nearly done,” she snorted, turning around to take a look at her checklist.

Her feet caught in the straps of her backpack and she wobbled forward, but Chat pounced inside in time to catch her before she could tumble down.

“Woah there, little lady… Your spatial awareness is worse than ever,” he said fondly as she clutched his arms. “Sorry, but I’m not letting you get back to work.”

“But I need to finish something…” Marinette protested.

“What you really need is to take a break.”

Marinette paused to think about it. Taking a break with Chat Noir… she seemed to recall that was on the list.

“Okay.” She shrugged.

“Good. Come here, then.” Chat Noir sighed in relief at her lack of resistance and started to lead her towards her bed, but before he’d let out his whole breath, Marinette was already trying to make her way back to her desk.

“Wait, I actually still have so much to do…” She reached for her flashcards, which tumbled at their feet.

“Okay, tell you what.” He kept hold of one of her hands as he picked the flashcards up to avoid her escaping. “Why don’t you take a small nap, and I’ll stay here and keep an eye on the time. I’ll wake you up in an hour, and when I leave I’ll turn a blind eye on your choice between going to bed and getting back to work.” She looked at her doubtfully, and glanced at the cards in his hands. He took a closer look at them; their content was that of the test they had the next day. “I can read you these while you fall asleep so it’s not too much of a waste of time, if you want.” He waved them in front of her face, hoping she’d say yes. He really needed the revision, too.

Marinette nodded and he led her to her chaise, helping her lie down on it. He started draping his blanket over her and was about to go and sit in her desk chair when she grabbed his free hand and pulled on it, a lot more strongly than he would have expected from her, especially in her exhausted state.

“Take a break with me.” She shifted to her left and patted the newly formed space. “Please?”

Her pleading bluebell eyes were difficult to deny.

“Okay,” he said as he sat next to her. Marinette snuggled up against him and sighed contently.

Chat’s heart skipped a beat. He wrapped a tentative arm around her and cleared his throat before starting to read. “The Hundred Years’ war actually lasted one hundred and sixteen years, from 1337 to 1453…”

His own tiredness hit him like a truck after a couple of pages, when he heard her soothing, gentle snoring. He lowered the flashcards to watch her sleep. She looked so tranquil, a peaceful smile drawn on her lips as her body slowly followed her breathing.

He felt his eyes close, and soon the both of them were breathing in sync, holding on to each other.

Needless to say, Chat left a little later than anticipated the next morning, woken up by the rising sun. Neither of them complained, though; both had had one of the most restful nights in a while, and both aced their History test.

Each wondered if they weren’t onto something in terms of revision technique.

Adrien almost gloated to Alya about how maybe Marinette didn’t have a boyfriend who took her mind off of work, but she had one who took care of her while she studied. Almost.

#marichatmay2021 #marichatmay #miraculous ladybug #the miraculous tales of ladybug and cat noir #ml #miraculous fanfiction #miraculous fanfic #ml ship month #marichat #marinette dupain-cheng #chat noir #day 11: take a break #day 12: cuddles #elle writes #love you (not)

[simpsiren]

sticky notes: the story

mark lee x reader

introduction 

main masterlist

description. you use sticky notes to get into contact with your soulmate.

genre. soulmate au, high school au, strangers to lovers au

warnings. nonee

a/n. so some people requested for a full story of this so here it is! i really liked making this because the concept is just so cute cudndn oh and i did include the same idea as what i did in my previous post but i had to change it a little so that it would fit the plot. this is a really really long ff since its a slow burn typa thing so please try to stick with me on this one HAHA anyways enjoyy! :D

“you actually believe that?”

you lift your head up from your notes to look at soyoung. she nods her head and hum eagerly. you rub your temples from seeing her respond. “i do believe soulmates exist. but sticky notes to talk to them? what’s social media for then? and how is it even scientifically possible?” you question soyoung, bringing your eyes down as you continue to do your homework.

“that’s the beauty of soulmates, ray!” soyoung whines. you shake your head. “you’re dumb to believe it without confirming the information with other relevant sources.” you mutter out bluntly. you hear soyoung letting out a ‘tsk’. “here you go again being a history student. i swear im glad i never took it.” you scoff and slam your pen on the table gently.

“excuse me, woman! at least i dont have to memorise the whole textbook and only having 5 pages of content coming out in the exam.” you stick your tongue out playfully to tease soyoung. “i cant get over the fact that valcanos didn’t come out eventhough i memorised so much for it.”

the both of you laugh, knowing that the two of you can never stop debating on whether history or geography is the better subject.

“ray complete your homework at home. we cant stay in the classroom for long you know?” soyoung stands up to get to her seat, which is 2 rows down yours since you were sitting right at the back. you liked sitting at the back. it allowed you to always be able to use your phone in case you get bored in class. you still cant believe that your teachers think you’re a good and obedient student. you figured they only assumed that due to your high grades.

you sigh “that’s true.” you turn around to grab your back that was hanging in your chair and start packing your materials. once you were done, you grab the class key and walk over to soyoung’s seat, waiting for her to finish packing. you notice soyoung has finish packing and went to switch off the lights. you allow soyoung to step out first before you close the door behind you and lock the classroom door.

you and soyoung walked down the hallway silently, you were looking out the window to watch the sunset while soyoung had her eyes on her feet. only your footsteps could be heard as almost everyone has left the school grounds except for some teachers who were working late. the school normally closes at 7pm and you’re walking out at 6:50. to break the silence, soyoung opens her mouth to start a conversation.

“okay if you dont believe me why dont you try it yourself? like write a simple introduction to your soulmate.” you raise an eyebrow as you shove your hands into the front pockets of your mom jeans. “why dont you do it?” you fought back as you huff. soyoung bites the inside of her cheek as a moment of silence passes for her to think of an answer.

“because i believe it. and you do not. so you should try it.” you smacked soyoung’s arm, making her flinch back and shouting a loud ‘ouch’. you roll your eyes, knowing you didn’t hit her hard and she was just overreacting. “brilliant excuse,so. but if its going to make you stop talking about it, i might as well.” soyoung face lit up as she jumps happily and starts skipping ahead of you. you laugh and pull the handle at back of her bag to keep her explosion of excitement to the minimum.

“you owe me brown sugar milk tea. large.” you taunted. soyoung waves her hand lazily. “i’ll buy you one after school tomorrow. but you better update me during math.”

you wanted to say how you could just text soyoung to update her, but you remembered the fact that soyoung’s mother took away her phone since she didn’t do well for this year’s midterms. although to you, soyoung’s grades were decent. unfortunately for her, soyoung has to live up to her asian mom’s high expectations. the thought of this made you want to frown, but you showed a bright smile regardless as the two of you finally made it to the school gate, waving to each other and bidding farewell before walking down opposite paths.

once you arrived at home, you took out your phone from your back pocket. you saw a notification from your mother saying that your parents would be home late. you shrug your shoulders as you walk to your room. “as always.” you breathed out.

you did your normal routine of showering and eating leftover dinner that you needed to heat up at the couch while you completed one episode of the anime series you were so hooked on. you continue watching but with the amount of homework you have, you might finish them all by midnight if you dont slack.

you turned off the tv and washed your plate before heading into your room. as you close the door behind you, your eyes immediately went to your desk, which was pretty messed up since you had a test to study for yesterday that you completely weren’t prepared for and had to squeeze in as much information as you can. hence, the scattering of notes and textbooks.

you stroll over to your desk and sat down. you take out your homework from your back which was beside the desk. looking at the stack of homework, you groan in despair as shove it to the back of the desk till it hit the wall. “ah fuck it! im just going to ask kun for help.” you admitted your defeat depsite thinking you would be able to gain some energy from your dinner. you also thought about how you’ve done your homework in the morning plenty of time so i shouldnt be a problem unless kun doesn’t offer his help.

you jump to your bed and lay down, bringing your phone out and immediately start scrolling through instagram. as you swiped your finger up to look at the posts of the people you follow, you stop at one. a picture of a couple who met through the sticky note theory. or so they claim. your thumbs hover over the screen as your eyes look up to the ceiling, starting to remember what soyoung asked to do to get your bubble tea.

yoy tap your index finger on the side of your phone as you constantly started to think whether you should do it or not. you’ve heard the rumours. but are they even true? the more you thought about it, the more intriguing the idea got. but at the same time, you also thought of how stupid it sounded and was probably made to fool people.

after contemplating and having in a debate in your head that felt like forever, you finally place your phone down beside you and take a deep breath. “ill do it.” you groan to yourself, letting curiosity take over your other feelings.

you gather up your strength to stand up from your bed and walk over to your desk. you push all the papers and textbooks aside, grabbing a yellow sticky notepad from your stationery organiser. you had other colours too like pink and purple, but you figured that you should go with the classic.

pulling out a random pen that was laying in between the pages of one of your textbooks, you tilt your head to the side as you start thinking of what to write, unconsciously biting the end of your pen in the process.

you bite the side of your cheek and shrug, deciding to go with the plan of writing whatever that comes to your mind.

um hi? i dont even know if you’re going to see this. its funny, really. i heard a rumour that you can communicate with your soulmate through sticky notes. it’s probably just fake news and im writing to a nobody. that would honestly be embarrassing but it’ll be like love letters.. to myself(?) or my soulmate. write back? haha

you read over what you wrote an endless amount of times, thinking if you should make changes. you groan and immediately stick the sticky note onto your wall, giving up on giving second thoughts about what you call this ridiculousness.

you went about your night, forgetting you have left the sticky note on the wall. as you were on you bed scrolling through tumblr at 2 in the morning, you hear something. it sounded like a piece of paper had fallen from your desk.

unable to see in complete darkness, you turn on the flashlight from your phone and walk around your room, trying to find whatever it is that fell. it didn’t take you long to find a small yellow sticky note that you accidentally stepped on.

you pick it up, remembering that you wrote on the sticky note and thought that it was yours. however, once you were able to get a closer look, you noticed that the words on the sticky note have changed. so has the handwriting.

holy shit. i dont know what is this. but apparently a sticky note appeared on my wall saying i have a soulmate. my friends told me i should write back because of some rumour. so here i am trying. hi im mark. i dont know your name, but hope you’ll tell me once you recieve this. you’re in luck because apparently the rumour is true. im just as crepped out as you are.

you froze in your spot. your fingers shaking as you read the note again. you scratch your head. being too tired and unable to think straight at 2 in the morning, you place the sticky note on your desk and went back to bed to play with your phone. you soon forget about the fact that your soulmate has replied to your message that you have written on your sticky note.

as you got ready for the next period which was math, soyoung immediately runs over to you, dragging the chair from the desk beside you and taking a seat. you flinch a little when you suddenly see her close to you. 

“so did you try it?!” soyoung asks, her voice filled with enthusiasm . you brushed a few pieces of hair behind your ear, nodding your head as you take out your textbook from under the desk. “did you get a reply then?” 

your mind started to take you back to the mysterious encounter that you had last night. “mhm.” you reply simply. “though the only thing i remember because it seems to be the only relevant information is that the person’s name is mark.” soyoung gasped loudly, making you crease your forehead as you watch her overreacting again. 

“your soulmate’s name is mark then.” soyoung concludes, folding her arms confidently as if she made a great discovery. you laugh, rolling your eyes sarcastically. “isnt it obvious?” soyoung frowns fakely. 

your mouth gapes open as you hit soyoung’s arm lightly. “buy me my milk tea!” you demanded with a wide smile. soyoung places her notebook on your table and nods constantly. “i will you addict.” she groans. you happily say thank you as your teacher comes into the classroom and class began. 

“what are you going to do about it now though?” as you recieved the question from soyoung, you kept silent for a moment, giving time to think of an answer.

 “ill write something back? i dont know.. ill have to read the letter again when i get back home.” you whispe to soyoung. she nods in reply as the two of you payed your attention to the front again. it surprised you that soyoung was paying attention but you only assumed that she wanted to do better in class and shrug your shouders, writing down the notes youve missed while talking to soyoung.

as for you, your concentration in class dipped slightly because now, the thing that is occupying your head the most is the thought that the sticky notes theory might actually be real and you cant say its not possible anymore, making you even more shocked than you did last night.

lucky for you, today is the only day of the week where your class ends the earliest, along with two other lower ranked classes. you and soyoung quickly pack up to go to the mall to get your reward. after soyoung buys you your drink, you and soyoung went your separate ways.

after about 30 minutes of taking the bus and walking, you finally arrived at home. you place your drink on the living room table and proceed to place your bag in the room and head for the showers.

once you were done showering, you walk out of the bathroom to head to your room while drying your hair with a small towel. opening the door, you enter and went straight to your clothing rack. just when you were about to grab a shirt from the hanger, you heard the same noise last night. another piece of paper has fallen on the floor.

you turn your head and look down. this time, you found another sticky note right in front of your feet. the colour of the sticky note changed from yellow to a light blue. you tilt your head as you pick up the stick note from the floor, finding it odd as you wonder how the colour of the sticky note changed.

you take a deep breath before reading it, noticing that the handwriting was similar to the one you read last night. a little messier, but still readable.

hi again.. im not sure if you’ll recieve this since its the afternoon and i know people are busy with work or school. i skipped school today so haha. um i just wanted to write to you, despite me not knowing a single thing about you. its odd really. its like i feel the need to write something to an unknown identity that people assume to be my soulmate. i still dont know your name, so i hope youll reply soon. take your time and take care :)

- mark

“skip school? what is he, a bad boy?” you scoff to yourself. you try to take in whatever’s on the note, but another thought comes to mind. you walk over to your desk and saw that the yellow sticky note with mark’s reply was still there. you find everything about this weird and just odd in general. a lot of questions sprouted, but you didn’t want to think of it since you were afraid you would complicate your thoughts and just throw yourself into a stress hole.

you continue to dry your hair with one hand while the other held onto the light blue sticky note. you bit your lip and gulp. after letting out a long sigh, you place the sticky note next to the other one and changed into your clothes, as well as bringing your drink from the living room table to your room, placing it on the desk as you sat down.

you take out your pencilcase from your bag and brought out your fresh new black pen that you just bought at the school’s stationery store. the previous pen you had was full of ink till soyoung was dumb enough to drop it, spoiling the pen and was unable to be used again.

peeling off another yellow stick note from the stack at the edge of your desk, you were about to put your pen on paper when you realise you dont even know what to write. what do you say to this person you barely know about? you continuously tap the edge of the pen against your desk as you take a sip of your drink. you look over to the two sticky notes with the messages that the person has left. its funny how you have to think so hard just to write a short message.

hey again. i actually ended school early today. my name’s raven. but my friends call me ray. i honestly don’t know what to say to you. im still dumbfounded over the fact that you’re my soulmate and we’re here communicating over sticky notes. the world really does work in a strange way. if you dont mind, i guess i want to know how old you are and you’re education status?

you held out the sticky note in front of you and sigh in satisfaction. why? it’s because of your neat handwriting. it was always a trait of yours that you deeply appreciate. you place the sticky note on the wall and advert your attention to the other sticky notes, placing them on the wall beside the new one you have just written.

“will this drive me insane? i might end up with a whole wall of this.” you say to yourself, rubbing your face with your palm before going to your bed and laying down, wanting to have your evening nap.

“this is awesome!”

“no its scary.”

mark and his group of friends stared at the sticky note that has a message written with beautiful handwriting. mark flinched when he felt an arm on his shoulder, turning around to notice it was chenle’s. “when did you write your previous sticky note?” renjun suddenly asked. mark tilts his head as he tried to find an answer.

“less than an hour before you guys came i guess?” mark shrugs, standing up from his desk and taking a seat at the edge of the bed beside jaemin and haechan. “this raven girl is your soulmate then.” chenle walks towards mark and stands in front of him. mark nods slowly. the room grew silent again with everyone having the similar thoughts.

“you know what would be funny?” haechan smacks mark’s thigh, the sound making everyone turn their attention to mark and haechan. “what?” mark asked with a sigh, running a hand through his hair.

“why dont we prank her and say you’re a sugar daddy and live in a mansion?!” everyone gave yuta weird looks, making haechan laugh hysterically. “are you crazy? do you think i want to chase my soulmate away?” mark scolded haechan, smacking him hard on the chest, resulting in haechan’s back falling onto the bed.

“you’re always asking for a beating i swear.” renjun comments, walking towards haechan and balling his hand into a fist and acting as if he was about to attack. jaemin laughs to try and calm them down. “kids let’s not fight.” jaemin announced, looking over to jeno only to find him standing there watching quietly.

“go ahead, mark. you should write something. we cant keep her waiting.” jeno finally spoke up, grabbing the sticky notepad and a random pen from mark’s table and passing it over to him.

mark stared at the blank paper while the others were talking about what to have for dinner. it didn’t take him long to decide what to write. when mark starts writing and began to be in full concentration, everyone crowds around him to see what he’s writing.

sup raven! i wont call you ray since we aren’t friends yet. im still shocked. like the possibility of things like this being possible is just another possibility that can possibly happen. but anyways, to answer you question, im a high schooler from dream high. im in my third year. its kind of awkward for me while im writing this since my friends are reading every word im taking down. i guess i should ask you the same question back then. hope to hear from you soon.

“will you guys stop being nosy?” mark groans, standing up and pasting the sticky note on his wall, along with the other sticky notes he received from you. “you didn’t have to say that we’re here.” haechan retorts. mark rolls his eyes. “jesus..” mark mutters under his breathe. “anyways, yall are paying for dinner since you guys bribed me to write back.” mark sticks his tongue out playfully and runs out to the living room. everyone follows suit.. except for jeno.

jeno slowly walks towards the wall and leans forward to get a closer look of the sticky notes, specifically the two others beside the new one that mark just wrote. “raven? why does that sound so familiar? the handwriting...” jeno brings his finger up and lightly hovers them over the uniquely written words. it looked like calligraphy, and retro looking. jeno felt as though he had seen it before somewhere, or knew someone who wrote like that.

jeno snapped out of his deep thoughts when jaemin called out to him, making him walk towards the door and glancing at the sticky notes once more before joining the others in the living room.

you were currently video calling your friends when you heard the crackling of a piece of paper. of course you knew what that meant. you peered down the the floor from your bed and reached your hand out to pick up the sticky note. “ray?” doyoung called out to you when he noticed your face wasnt on screen. you lay back down on the floor and brought your phone up to show your face.

“what was that sound earlier?” lucas asked, currently sounding hyper. “the mysterious mark sent me another sticky note.” you reply sarcastically, waving the sticky note to the camera to let everyone look at it. everyone nodded their heads at the some time, some letting out a long ‘ah’ as well. “read it out loud!” yuta shouted.

“the fuck no!” you shouted back. you stared at the sticky note, but didn’t bother to read it. you thought of doing that once you’re done video calling them.

“how was today for you guys?” you asked, wanting to know how they’re doing.

“its tiring! we had dance practice, then we have to do recordings for our new albums. we barely get any sleep.” ten whines, his tone filled with stress. you laugh loudly. it made everyone frown and pout. you sigh. “pursuing your NCT world domination is never easy.” you commented, highlighting the word ‘world domination’ with a change of tone.

everyone lets out a long sigh and started to complain one by one, making the whole video call chaotic for almost 10 minutes. you could only smile and shake your head.

after about an hour or so of talking about basically everything and catching up with each other, everyone decided that they should end the call here since it was beginning to get dark and they needed to start practice soon. you bid your goodbye to them once more and ended the call.

you now adverted your attention to the sticky note. reading the letter, you raise both eyebrows. “dream high? that’s not far from here..” you mumbled to yourself. you started to think about everything you know about dream high. you know it’s was about an hour’s journey from where you live. it wasnt really well known either. the overall vibe of the school was mediocre.

however, you felt like you were missing something. something about that school is somehow related to you. you just couldn’t think of an answer despite squeezing all thoughts that you have in your brain. you groan and stood up from your bed and to your desk, proceeding to wanting to write a reply to mark.

hey. sorry if you get this quite late. i was busy video calling my friends. to answer your question, im a third year as well from jookin high. i would ask for your number so we dont have to do this all the time but my friend would scold me saying “but you’re removing the fun out of it.” but anyways, mark aka my soulmate, tell me about yourself, to start off.

you stick the note onto the wall, looking at the row of messages you’ve had recieved so far. you found it weird how the first time you’ve sent the note and got a reply back, it was on the same sticky note, just different handwriting. but you had to write on a new sticky note to send a new message only to get the same sticky note with a different message in return.

you only see his answers lined up on your wall. you started to wonder how this mark guy looked like. is he good looking? what are his hobbies? his attitude towards school? you really wished you could just text him through instagram and not have to go through all this trouble. but that option would earn you a large smack on the back by soyoung and your really didn’t want that.

“do we really need to be here now? like now?!”soyoung whined, while pushing the cart and following behind you while you tossed some packets of frozen bacon. you stopped walking and turn around, nodding your head intensely. soyoung groans and took out her phone, proceeding to use it while still pushing the cart.

you walk around the supermarket, trying to find the ingredients listed on your notes in your phone. it was the weekends and you’re parents were going to be away for a business trip for a week so you thought of inviting soyoung over and making home cooked meals as a bonding session for you two.

after about 30 minutes of gathering the ingredients and having soyoung constantly screaming and fangirling over tiktok edits of jaehyun from NCT. one note: she has yet to know that you know them and that they’re your friends. you figured that it would be best to not let anyone know so as to avoid any situation that would put your friends in a tight spot, since well they’re idols, you were looking for one last item that you had trouble finding.

“soyoung help me! stop watching tiktoks!” you groan, snatching soyoung’s phone away and shoving it in her back pocket. soyoung rolls her eyes lazily and the two of you proceeded to scan the different isles and shelves, looking over every item.

while you were too concentrated looking at the bottom shelves, you felt that you have bumped into someone. you squat down, letting out a soft ‘ouch’ before standing up and looking to see who you bumped into.

“wait. jaemin?” you furrow your eyebrows as you tilt your head, pointing your finger at the guy in front of you. “raven!” you noticed that it was jaemin after all, and both your faces lit up and the same time, grinning widely at each other.

“uhhh..” soyoung says out loud, you and jaemin turn your heads to face soyoung who was behind you. “oh! this is jaemin. we used to be neighbourhood friends before he moved out 4 years ago.” you introduced jaemin to soyoung. jaemin nodded and gave her a bright smile. soyoung only shrugged her shoulders and took out her phone. you turn your attention back to jaemin.

“why are you even here? dont you live quite far?” you ask, your fingers interlocked behind your back. jaemin nods, running a hand through his hair.

“well yes. but we came here to find something that only this supermarket sells.” jaemin replied back, his warm smile never leaving his lips. you smile, reached your hand out to ruffle his hair, laughing softly afterwards. “we? who’re you with?” you stared at jaemin with eyes of suspicion. jaemin started pinching your cheeks, making you whine and begging him to let go.

“with my friend, ray chill. im still single.” jaemin pulled away and folded his arms, pouting. “im sure you’ll find one soon.” you reached out to ruffle his hair and give off a wide smile.

while you and jaemin were catching up and being in your own world, soyoung got too bored of watching the two of you and decided to walk around the supermarket, leaving the cart behind you.

just as she was looking at the drinks isle to get her favourite sweet drink, she sees someone picking up a bunch of bottles one by one and placing them back on the shelve. out of kindness, she decided to help, picking up a bottle and placing it on fhe shelve before looking up to face the guy, who had a straight face while looking at her.

“i was just trying to help. im soyoung.” soyoung smiled, reaching her hand out and waiting for thr guy to greet back. he looked at her but doesn’t respond, proceeding to pick up the last bottle that was seen on the floor. “im jeno.” jeno stands up and nods his head to greet soyoung. soyoung nods back, walking down the isle to grab her drink from the shelve. “have a nice day.” soyoung says before leaving the isle and disappearing out of jeno’s sight. he only shrugged in response and went to do his own thing.

“you met who?!” haechan asks as he takes a sip of his ice cold water. everyone had their heads turned to jaemin, who raised an eyebrow at everyone’s weird expression. “i met my old friend raven. what’s so shocking?” jaemin asks back casually, picking up a few pieces of fries and dipping it into the sauce before shoving it in his mouth.

“dude that’s the name of mark’s soulmate!” haechan screams, making everyone flinch due to the loud noise. “i highly doubt it. there’s plenty of girls in the world with the name raven.” jaemin protests with his mouth full and chugging down gulps of coca cola.

“i mean that’s true. jeno you were with jaemin, right? dont you suspect anything?” renjun starts to question jeno, who was silently playing with his phone. looking up at the others, he gulps.

“i didn’t know he met his friend. i was picking out drinks. i just met a girl named soyoung.” jeno shrugs, taking a bite of his burger. mark scratches the back of his head, now starting to think of the fact that jaemin might have met his soulmate. though he also thought about how that could not be totally possible.

“nah i dont think its her. like really ‘raven’ could be anyone.” mark says, siding with jaemin. haechan tilts his head in awe. “jaemin do you know what school she’s going to?” jaemin only shakes his head.

“i lost all contact with her when i left her neighbourhood. plus we were young. i barely knew her honestly.” the living room falls silent, everyone trying to think of a conclusion to this.

chenle groans, standing up from his seat and slamming his hands on the table, gathering everyone’s attention as their heads shot up. “instead of pondering as if yall are solving some crime, why dont mark just ask her through the sticky note god dammit?” chenle pinches the bridge of his nose.

everyone’s mouths gape open as the room was suddenly filled with ‘ah’s all over. chenle shakes his head. everyone was now looking intensively at mark. mark furrows his eyebrows. “okay guys hold up ill grab the stick note.” mark stands up and takes one bite of his burger before going into his room for awhile and coming out with a sticky note and a pen.

jaemin noticed jeno being silent the whole way. and althought thats normal since its jeno’s nature and personality to not be so outspoken like the others, jaemin could sense that jeno was off and seem to be in deep thoughts.

and jaemin was right. jeno couldnt stop thinking about jaemin’s encounter with ‘raven’. the name sounded so familiar. he tried to recall every girl he has came into contact with during his life. why did he feel like the name was tied to the handwriting he saw on the sticky notes?

“jeno.” jaemin nudged him in the shoulder. jeno mumbled a soft ‘oh’ before turning his attention to mark just like the others. “she didn’t send me a reply after my last one though.” mark says, looking up.

“its fine. she probably didn’t see it. just write already.” chenle says in anticipation. mark shakes his head. “calm the heck down its not like we can get an answer immediately.” mark rolls his eyes and began to write.

hey raven. um i know this may sound weird. but have you gone to a supermarket and met a guy names jaemin? im not a stalker i swear. its just that he’s my friend and apparently you know him. though i dont think that such a coincidence and come by just like that. hope you hear from you soon.

jeno stared at the sticky note that mark proceeded to place at a random wall of the living room while everyone continued to eat and chat. his thoughts finally linked and a imaginary lightbulb appeared on above his head when he finally realises why he was so drawn to mark’s soulmate.

you were focused on wanting to solve a math question when the sticky note above your desk’s wall had fallen in front of you, revealing a new message. you place your pen down and let out a sigh, remembering that you hsve forgotten to write a reply and that mark probably sent you another one.

you tied your hair in a messy low bun before picking up the sticky note to get a closer view. you blink your eyes rapidly as your eyes furrow in awe. what the note said really shocked you and made you freeze in your spot. jaemin is friends with your soulmate? there’s no way.

you sat there for awhile as you constantly read over the words, still in shock with your moutb hanging open. you just couldn’t believe it. was it really what it seemed to be? another thought came to your mind as well. the thought of just who is this friend of jaemin’s? could it be mark? was your soulmate literally in the same place as you yet you never knew?

you grab a fresh new piece of sticky note and proceeded to write a reply after staring at it for so long and thought that it was finally time that you do something.

okay what you wrote really was weird. jaemin’s my old neighbourhood friend. its such a coincidence how you know him. i guess the connections are there. so haha yeah. damn. im very mind blown right now.

you take a look at your handwriting again, smiling to yourself. “i really do love my handwriting.” you mumble under your breath. you stuck the sticky note on the wall and resumed doing your homework, hoping that mark would reply soon.

while the boys were immersed in the horror movie they were watching on friday night, everyone turned their heads to each other when they heard the noise of a piece of paper falling onto the floor. in unison, everyone turned their head to where the noise came from and seeing the sticky note that fell.

jisung grabs the controller and pauses the movie. “we’re watching a scary movie and creepy stuff like that happens?!” jisung asks, stuttering out of complete fear.

mark decided to be the brave one after seeing everyone’s terrified face and stands up to pick up the sticky note, going back to take his seat on the couch soon after. “d-does that always happen?” mark shrugs. “well duh. that’s how i know she sent a reply. it wouldn’t be this scary if we weren’t watching a horror movie.”

everyone’s heads once again gather around mark as he read the note out loud. everyone gapes their mouth open, some covered their mouths while jeno could only stare at it in disbelief. “i guess we’ve confirmed its her.” mark breathes out, placing the sticky note on the table.

jeno reaches out to grab the sticky note to have a look. the unique handwriting that he suspected would belong to you really was yours. out of anger, he tears the sticky notes into two. everyone had their eyes widened at jeno’s sudden shocking action. mark snatches the now torn note back, looking down at them before facing jeno.

“what the heck was that for?!”

“dont talk to her anymore. she’s trouble.”

everyone lets out a sigh in unison except for mark, looking at everyone’s weird reaction. “what do you mean trouble? and why does it look like you all know something except me?” mark furrows his eyes as everyone exchanged glances continuously for a moment.

“she’s just not someone you should be with. that’s all.” jeno stands up and walks to his room, slamming the door shut and produring a piercing noise. the room was silent for awhile until mark speaks up.

“what am i missing here you guys?”

no one replies.

“we’ve been friends for a year and you guys are all keeping secrets for me?” mark scoffs in disbelief, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“we arent in the position to tell you. its jeno.” jaemin murmurs under his breath, looking down on the ground just like the others.

marks keeps silent and stands up from the couch, the palm the torn note was in is balled into a fist as he goes into his room as well.

haechan sighs. “jeno has to tell the truth. he’s been holding onto that grudge almost forever now.”

everyone nods their heads in agreement. “if not, he’s going to live in despair now that he knows she’s his best friend’s soulmate..” jisung adds on. 

everyone could only silently hope that things could go well. 

after that day you’ve sent a reply, you havent heard from mark since. you dont know why. due to your lack of information on him, it felt as if he disappeared into thin air. although only a week has past by, you felt concerned and somewhat worried for him. did something happen to him? what made him cut off his connection with you? its not like you did anything wrong. 

out of pure desperation, you decided to skip school today. youve never skipped school before, and you felt so rebellious and bad. why did you do this? so you could go to dream high and meet mark in person. youve had enough of the sticky notes. you just wanted to see how he was like in real life, not having to think about it through notes. 

with a little help from jaemin by texting him on instagram, you knew that mark’s class should be ending by 4pm, and you were there at 3:50 in the canteen where jaemin told you to wait. funny how the security guard lets a student from another school come in with a pass or anything.

you slowly start seeing groups of students going down the flight of stairs that lead to the canteen which had a path leading to the front gates. some eyes glanced at you as they notice someone who doesnt belong at their school, you couldnt care less though. your thoughts were only filled with mark. how he looked like, how he would carry himself. your anticipation was the only thing you felt.

you wore your headphones yet you could suddenly hear a lot of squealing and shouting. you look up, turning you attention to the stairs. a large group of girls crowding around another group of people, who you assumed to be guys. you scoffed, thinking about how there’s always that one group of good looking guys all girls seem to go crazy for. you watch as the group of guys push through the large crowd.

once you got a closer look, you tilt your head to the side. you slowly bring your headphone down from your ears and let them rest on your neck, getting intrigued by how the girls were getting so crazy, even more crazy than the ones from your school.

“its mark! he’s so cute!” 

you widen your eyes as you heard the word ‘mark’. you stood up from your seat, peering your head up to find which one is the girl referring to. you only see two guys walking. one smiling sheepishly while the other kept a straight and cold face. just which one is mark?

suddenly, you felt an arm grabbing yours and pulling you back. you jump out of fear and turn around noticing it was jaemin. you calmed your breathing as you look at jaemin. 

“meet mark under the block nearby. its too hectic here for you to talk to him.”

jaemin dragged you out of the school grounds and to a secluded block where only a few students where walking past and left you there. you were lost in confusion but decided to trust whatever jaemin was doing, sitting down at a random bench.

“jaemin told us to meet him here where is-” 

“raven.”

“what?”

you immediately stood in front of the two guys you saw at the canteen as you notice a familiar face. you werent able to get a clear look at them before, but now you realise that you knew one of them. “jeno..” you look at a different direction a you tried avoiding his gaze, though you knew you couldnt, forcing yourself to meet his eyes.

mark looks at the both of you, utterly confused as his attention shifts from you to jeno constantly. “this raven?” mark points at you, tilting his head. you nod slowly as your turn your head to face mark. you observed his body up and down. he was good looking, just like jeno.. yet his aura told you that he was way more outgoing and open than jeno. 

“you look...”

everyone was silent.

you gulp in nervousness. “im busy. bye mark.” before jeno could go, mark pulled on his arm to bring him back to stand beside him, earning a glare from jeno. the one you could never forget. “stay. i know something happened. you were always quiet whenever we talked about this girl. and i also know you all kept something from me.”

you slowly turned to jeno. you could he was annoyed whenever he looked at you. you felt it through his eyes, and it was terrifying. jeno took a deep breath in, folding his arms and placing his weight on one leg. 

“if you remember clearly, chenle told you that before we became friends with you, we had a fight and didnt talk to each other for a long time. we didnt tell you this, but it was her who caused it. she brought chaos into our group. everyone forgotten about it clearly, but i cant. after what she did.. i cant forgive her.”

you opened your mouth, wanting to reply but your words were somehow stuck in your throat. you didnt exactly know what to say or do in this awkward situation.

“it.. it was a long time ago jeno, please. my feelings for you were real, even if we werent meant to be. i dont know how many times you need me to say sorry.” you pleaded, biting your lip as you waited for jeno’s reaction.

jeno sighs and runs a hand through his hair as he lets out a huff of rustration. “then why did you leave? you left me stranded, and because of you, i almost left my friends becaused i lived in agony since i missed you so much. i almost pushed everyone away.” you shivered as jeno’s voice started to raise. 

 you also glanced at mark, who still kept his confused expression on his face. through his gaze never left you as you felt his eyes scanning you body up and down. 

“you two used date?” mark asks. you nod in reply.

“we were kids. we didnt know about all this soulmate stuff. but now..” 

“you know what? be together. im not going to leave my friends just because of my pent up grudge and feelings. i cant control fate either.” 

years had now past since you met mark. it really was fate. the two of you became close in no time and now.. you were fianally married. you couldnt be more happy to be with mark. who you were destined to be really was made for you, and you only. and to think this all escalated due to a note you sent out in pure curiosity.

you still remember what happened with jeno after that day, despite the lack of interaction between you two, jeno was open enough to accept you as his friend again. you are now living a happy life with mark, and always being able to hang out with his group of friends. today was no different. 

“haechan get the chilli sauce!” you hear mark shout as you smile widely, feeling his arm snaking around your waist to pull you close. having a barbeque was a great idea to celebrate jisung’s birthday. 

you soon see haechan with the bottle of chilli sause, placing it on the table where everyone gathered around the table which had jisung’s birthday cake. “before we do anything with the cake, let me announce my wish.” jisung announces proudly. you raise an eyebrow. “you cant say you birthday wish out loud!” you scolded jisung, but everyone laughs.

“his wish is something we all know.” jeno says, winking playfully at you. you tilt your head in confusion when you suddenly feel mark’s arm leaving you waist. you look over to mark who was shoving his hand into his pocket as if to find something.

you were completely clueless when mark nods towards jisung, to show some kind of signal. “i wish for mark and raven to get married!” jisung shouts. 

you gaped your mouth open in shock when mark pulls out a small box, opening it in front of you to show a ring. you cover your mouth in disbelief. “did you guys really-”

“please marry me, raven. my sticky note soulmate.” you hear everyone clapping s a tear of happiness drips from your cheek. you quickly wipe it away as you heard the nickname that mark gave you. “we wouldnt normally do this but it was jeno that suggested this.”

you look over to jeno who had a soft smile on his face as he nod his head. looking back at mark, you grin widely as more tears started flowing out. “of course ill marry you, you dork.”

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[juvian]

A turn of events - Chapter 6

Header cr.

Summary : Korimi Lockser always been one of the best students, but one day when her crush decide to come visit his friends more often, including her sister. She decide do to the dumbest thing she’s done in her life… fake being stupid to get is attention.

Disclaimer : Fairy tail belong to Hiro Mashima !

Characters : Korimi Lockser (Oc), Rogue Cheney, Sting Eucliffe, Juvia Lockser, Lyon Vastia.

Shipping(s) : Oc X Lyon Vastia.

Genre : High school au, modern au, romance and humour.

Words : 1779

Chapters : Masterlist // Chapter 5 // Chapter 7

Chapter 6

I think studying with the boys together is the worst thing.

Me, having to explain everything to Sting,  because he is stupid. While he’s whining about the fact that Rogue didn’t want us to stop and take a break until he understand the fucking thing.

Yeah studying with them is great…

“I need a break please. “Sting whined, again. “Not only because I still don’t understand, but I really have to pee guys.

“Arg... Go! But after that you are not sleeping until you understand the damn thing!” 

Sting thanked me and ran to the bathroom, leaving me alone with his brother. I started to read the next math problem we are trying to learn, when I felt my phone vibrate. I took it and saw that an unknown number had sent me a text.

“« It’s Lyon, your sister gave me your number, I was at your home today, but you weren’t there. She said you must be with friends, we should text each other so we know when the other is gonna be busy hahaha :). »”

Oh. My. God… He was really home! And I missed him. I wanted to cry… I could have been studying with him and not with the idiot and Rogue! Sorry Rogue… Oh I should answer!

“« I am so sorry Lyon, I didn’t think you would come again, I feel bad :/ I am actually studying with friends… Tell me when you want to come again, I’ll be there!”

“« it’s okay, don’t feel bad you didn’t know :) I’ll come tomorrow»”

I probably look stupid right now, with this big stupid ass smile plastered on my face right. At least only Rogue is here with me.

“It’s Lyon?” He said, coldly, which surprised me. 

“Umm… Yeah, Ju gave him my number, he came home and I wasn’t there so he said to text him if I am going somewhere so he doesn't come over for nothing.”

“So he is saying that you’re wasting his time.”

“He didn’t say that, he is really kind for giving me his time! But if I am not there it’s useless he can do something else instead, he is super busy with university too.”

“Ummm… So… Are you going to ask him to come with you to prom?”

“Ummm… I don’t think so, why would he come with me to prom?” I said, my cheeks turning red.

I mean why would he come with a kid like me to prom and how could I ask him. I would probably froze and say some stupid shit.

“Ok.”

“Why are you asking?”

“I always thought we would go together, like everybody.”

Ah shit… Do I really have to deal with this… I don’t want to make him sad.

“Well, if you want us to go together, I don’t care, it’s just prom, I’ll have  other occasions to be with him, you are more important to be honest and it’s your prom too.”

“You should try, I don’t wanna get between you and the love of your life.”

I didn’t know what to answer so I just shut my mouth. It was silent for some minutes until Sting opened the door and joined us on the floor where we were seated.

“Did you miss me?”

“No.”  Rogue said, not looking up from his notebook.

God I love him.

“Actually, I couldn’t wait for you to come back.”

Sting looked at me with the most confused face ever and Rogue was probably wondering why the fuck I was saying that.

“Ah yeah?” I could see the scared look on his face.

“Yeah, Lyon texted me, he was home today. SO I have to kill you because it was your idea that I come here.”

“What wait!”

Before he said something else I jumped on him and started to hit him while Rogue watched us desperately.

***

“Juvia, I’m back from school!” I yelled, as I put my bad on the floor.

“Kori-Chan!”  My sister yelled, as I saw her get up from the couch and she came to hug me. “How was school?”

“It was great, I had my grade for my history exam and I had 96%”

“That’s amazing Kori-Chan! You are so intelligent Juvia is so proud of you.”

“Thanks Ju.” I said, laughing.

“That’s why you should explain to me why you need Lyon’s help in math?”  She asked, with a knowing look.

“Please don’t judge me! You are not one to Judge Juvia Lockser.”

“Juvia is not judging you! She would never dare to do it! Juvia is just wondering why you’re using the bad grade card and not your natural charm.”

“I don’t know, it’s the first thing that came to my mind, I am so much younger than him so I don't know how to act around him and make him see that I am not just your little sister.”

“Juvia is not the best example for having a guy's attention, but she thinks Kori-Chan should only be herself, he’s not that much older and you’re mature for your age.”

“If you said so…” I said, not convinced, what I was doing now was far from mature. “He said he’ll come, he is not here?”

I put my bag in the hallway and checked my phone to see if he sent a  text, but no, it means he’ll come no? I must be late, that's it. I was going to sit on the couch when someone rang the bell. It must be him!!! 

“Lyon! How are you?”

“Good and you? Sorry I am a little late, I had to do something.”

“I am doing great thank you and it’s okay Kori-Chan arrived only 5 minutes ago.

My sister let him enter and I ran to the door before he could see me and greet him. Subtle much Korimi.

“Hi Lyon!”

“Hi Kori, are you ready for today?”

“Always! I mean… I am a studious girl already so if I can finally understand the only thing that messes with my grade then I am ready for it!”

“I understood you don’t have to explain yourself.” He laughed and my heart melted.

“You should work in the kitchen.” My sister said. “You must not have enough places on the living room table.”

“You are right it was a little bit cramped.” He laughed, again.

Stop laughing, don’t do this please my heart, it won’t take it. 

***

“So your exams are next week right?” Lyon asked, while we were taking our first little break of the day.

“Yes and after  I am finally done with high school!”

“You can wait?” He asked and I nod. “You don’t like school?”

“Ah no, I like school, I like learning things, school as students and teachers though… sometimes it gets really annoying.”

“I see.” He laughed. “I was like that too, I mean I was one of the best students and pretty much everyone was jealous of me, my face didn’t help this. So I didn’t really care about the other students and the teachers, except my friends.

Okay he is beautiful and really intelligent and I love him, but modesty is not his thing at all.

“Do you think a week is enough for you to understand everything?” He continued.

“Umm, yeah.” I said. “I mean, I actually don’t have a bad grade? I understand so much more, you help a lot thank you, but I still need you a lot too.” I laughed, trying to sound as believable as possible. 

“I”ll help you as long as you want me to.” He smiled and I almost cried, he is beautiful when he smile god. “And if I am not here you probably have someone to help you a little.”

“Yes, but no one is as good as you.” I said, winking.

“I like you.” He said, laughing and I died. “We should continue now.”

We continued to look at the textbook he brought from his home and work on some examples. I was starting to put more details and the right explanations to show some amelioration in my math, but still wrote some mistakes in them. Sometimes when it was an easier question I gave the right answer and if you saw the smile and the proud look on his face, I was melting. But that smile also made me a little guilty, I was lying to him to have his attention. It was not right, I was starting to think he may hate me if I tell him later.

“What’s with the sad face Kori? Is something wrong?” He asked worryingly and the guilt grew even more.

“No it’s okay, just thinking about the end of my high school year, it still makes me sad and a little nervous, the exam, prom and some of my friends going their own ways, which means I’m probably going to see them less and less.

“It’s okay, you’ll always find a way to see them. I see my best friend once a year, but we are still really good friends like the first time we saw her.” He said, passing an arm on my shoulder and hugging me lightly, it was really hard not to pass out on the spot. “Sherry even got married! It’s life we can’t do anything about it but we can make it work, promise you.” 

“Yeah, I know.” I said, smiling.

“So prom? When is it? You have a date?” He asked, taking off his arm from my shoulder. No come back ! 

“Umm… last day of school, well we don’t have exams on this day, but yeah. No I don’t… Well yes I have a date, Rogue and I always do everything together and everyone’s sure we will go together so nobody will dare to ask me.” I said, laughing awkwardly.

“He didn’t ask you? He should ask you anyway, doing it the proper way.” He smiled. “If he doesn't I’ll do it, he said, probably joking but OH MY GOD MY HEART!

“What?” I asked, surprised, trying to not show my heart was read to get out of my chest at any second.

“I am joking, I am not going to a high school prom, It'll be weird don’t you think?” He said, laughing.

“Hahaha yeah.” I said, trying to laugh but it ended up sounding fake. I hope he didn’t notice.

I can forget asking him and anyway I can’t do this to Rogue. He wants us to go together, so we'll go together! I don’t care about Lyon and I can’t let down my best friend like this!

“Well we should finish this chapter before dinner.” He smiled and I agreed. 

Korimi now concentrate!

#I may have to repost the other chapter cause the links seemed broken but here's chapter 6 for now !!!! #please reblog and leave a nice comment if you like it ! #alex's stories #📖 : atoe #fairy tail #mine #original date : March 11th 2018 #oc x lyon vastia #👤 : Korimi #rogue cheney #sting eucliffe #Juvia Lockser #lyon vastia #fanfiction #fanfic #ft fanfic #fairy tail fanfiction #fairy tail fanfic #ft fanfiction #romance #humour #ft modern au #fairy tail modern au #ft high school au #fairy tail high #my stories #my fanfiction #my fanfic #my ocs

[alounuitte]

cactus blossoms

(or, some can only bloom with water from a desert sky)

Adam needs some support while he recovers from a surgery, and Shiro volunteers to be his best friend's roommate for the summer after their first year in the Garrison. Somehow, it turns out he's not the only one Adam gets a chance to get closer to, and an operation isn't the only thing he's recovering from. (pre-relationship, but no romance will be in this.)

Couple minor warnings for this chapter: some brief medical discussion and (external) description of anxiety/sensory overload.

Chapter 6. 

-

Everyone else must be just as hungry as Matt, because there’s a solid five minutes where they’re all too busy eating to speak. Shiro finally puts down his fork long enough to say, “This is really good, thanks for making it.” 

“Yeah, thanks a ton, Mrs Holt,” Adam agrees. “You didn’t have to go to this much trouble.” 

“It’s not trouble to celebrate moving with the two of you,” Colleen says, laughing. “That’s what community is for.” She takes a sip of her juice and then adds, as an afterthought, “Speaking of which, if you’re still looking for a congregation here, you should attend service at ours sometime and see if you like it.” 

“Oh,” Adam says, ducking his head. “Thanks. I already go to Bet Shalom Yisrael, though.”

Colleen frowns slightly, but all she says is, “Oh, I see.”

“Well, I’m glad you’ve found a place you’re happy,” Sam says cheerfully. “But Etz Chayim always welcomes visitors, if you ever want to stop by!” 

“I’ll keep it in mind,” Adam says, with a faint smile. 

“So, Shiro, what classes are you taking this summer?” Sam asks, pushing his glasses up his nose. “I saw you’re on the roster for my tech development class.”

“I’m also doing applied aviation physics in the afternoons,” Shiro says, grinning. 

“Oh, I’m taking that, too,” Adam says, lighting up. “Awesome.” 

“Oh, I didn’t know you were taking classes,” Sam says, surprised. “Thought you were having a procedure done?”

Adam shrugs. “I’m exempted from training and drills,” he says, “but I don’t want to waste the whole summer when I should be cleared to take classes once they start.”

“What are you getting done, anyways?” Matt asks with his mouth full. 

Next to him Shiro feels Adam go tense. 

“Is it your eyes?” Matt continues, oblivious, and points to his own wire-rimmed glasses. “That’s the first thing I’m gonna do when I join the Garrison! I won’t ever have to wear these again.” 

Shiro laughs at that, and across the table Colleen puts a hand on Matt’s shoulder. “Sounds like you’re both going to be busy,” she says. “But those should be interesting classes, right?”

Adam relaxes a little, laughing shakily. “I hope so,” he says. Under the table Shiro can see his hand pressed into his leg, fingers restlessly curling and uncurling. His throat feels tight. 

Matt must have already forgotten his original question, though, because the next thing he says when he stops eating to talk is, “You guys must be, like, really good at math and stuff to learn all that! You’ve gotta take a bunch of tests to get into the Garrison, right? Were they super hard?”

“They’re pretty intense,” Shiro agrees. “You’re gonna have to study way more than we are right now to pass them.”

Matt’s eyes go wide behind his glasses. “For real?” he asks. 

The hint of a smile creeps onto Adam’s face again as he leans forward. “They’re the hardest exams you’ll ever have to take in your life,” he says seriously. “I hope your dad helps you more than my parents did; you can’t just fall back on family legacy.” 

“Don’t terrorize the poor boy!” Montgomery says, shaking her head. “The entrance exams are tough, but nothing a dedicated student can’t handle. If you’ve got your dad’s smarts, you’ll be fine, kiddo.”

“He’s got better than that,” Sam says, chuckling. “He’s got his mother’s.”

“Maybe so,” Colleen says with a wry smile, “but he’s got your curiosity.” 

“Guuuuuyyyyyys,” Matt whines, pouting. “You’re so embarrassing.” He turns to Sam and adds, wide-eyed, “You’re gonna help me study, right? So I can get in?”

“Only if you keep your grades up in school,” Sam says, ruffling his hair. “Don’t worry, though, you’ve got another three years before you need to worry about that.”

“Yeah,” Matt says, “but I gotta start thinking about it now so I’m ready!”

Shiro laughs, but Adam is quiet, his smile forced and his dark eyes darting from one person to another. From a foot away Shiro can feel the tension in his shoulders, humming like a live wire. He wants to help comfort him, somehow, but can’t think of how, at least not without drawing more attention onto him, and from the way Adam’s drawn his shoulders in on himself he thinks more attention is the last thing he needs.

As everyone is finishing the last of their food, Colleen takes advantage of the quiet to say, “You boys must be getting tired. You did a lot of work today, too, and you’ve got an early morning tomorrow.”

“Great point, sweetheart,” Sam says, getting up from the floor. “We’ll help you clean up before we go, no need for you to get up.”

“Thanks, Sam,” Shiro says with a rueful grin, as how exhausted he is suddenly seems to sink in. 

“I really appreciate all the help,” Adam says, managing a faint smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. “I don’t think we could’ve done all this without you, sir.” 

“No need to be so formal, son,” Sam says, laughing. “You can feel free to let me know if there’s anything else we can help with.”

“And do the same for me,” Montgomery adds as she climbs to her feet. “I’m here to help support you both if there’s anything you need.”

She and the Holts move over to the kitchen to tidy up, and Shiro leans back against the couch, stretching his legs out under the table. “You okay?” he asks Adam under his breath. 

Adam nods, trying his best to smile again. “Just tired,” he whispers back. 

“Kind of a lot of people, huh,” Shiro says sympathetically. 

He hunches his shoulders, looking away, and doesn’t reply. 

“Best of luck on your exams tomorrow, kids,” Sam says, beaming at them, as he heads towards the door. “You’re both gonna do great.” 

“Thanks, Sam,” Shiro says, waving. “See you later.” 

“Bye!” Matt calls over his shoulder as Colleen ushers him into the hall. Montgomery flashes them both a smile and waves with one hand before disappearing into the hall, and the door slides closed behind her, leaving the apartment in silence. 

“Sorry,” Adam mumbles after a moment, drawing his legs up to his chest to lean his head against his knees.

“What?” Shiro asks, frowning. “No, why would you be—? I get it, seriously.” 

Adam glances up at him, biting his lower lip. “You like people, though.” 

“I already know the Holts,” he replies. “It’s different with strangers.” More quietly, he adds, “And to be honest, I’m a little overwhelmed, too.” 

That gets Adam to laugh a little, and he takes off his glasses to scrub at his eyes with the heel of one hand. “You handle it better,” he says. 

Shiro shrugs. “I dunno about that. I think you’re probably just more tired than I am.” 

“I guess,” Adam says, and swallows hard. 

“We should probably both get to bed, anyways,” Shiro points out with a wry smile. “Colleen’s right, we need the rest for tomorrow.” 

“Yeah,” he agrees, and gets to his feet, grabbing his duffel off the couch as he heads towards his side of the room. Shiro follows, slinging his own bag over his shoulder, but as he reaches the edge of the partition, he stops as Adam says, suddenly, quietly, “Hey, Shiro?” 

“Yeah?” he asks, turning to look at him. He’s staring at the floor, hands clasped together in front of him and twisting around each other anxiously, and it’s a second before he speaks.

“Thanks,” he says finally. “For understanding.” 

“Yeah, of course,” Shiro says. When Adam still doesn’t move, he takes a couple steps closer, reaching for his shoulder without touching him, waiting for him to respond. 

Adam looks up, giving him a crooked smile, before he steps forward to hug him, and Shiro finds himself grinning as he hugs back. 

#voltron adam #voltron shiro #voltron #voltron legendary defender #takashi shirogane #adam voltron #adam weismann #sam holt #matt holt #colleen holt #professor montgomery tag #willwrites #vld #vldfic #belong to the sky verse

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

A Family of Five- Part 7: Secret Holder

Calum and Harlowe’s marriage hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been filled with love. This is a collaborative experience with In Sorrow and In Joy. Dad!Calum. Black OC.

CW: Over the course of this series, there are mentions of pregnancy, therapy, and postpartum depression. There is also 18+ Content (Smut)

Enjoy my masterlist | Series Masterlist

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No one has my permission to repost my work of fiction. This includes translations as well. 

______________________________

Te Koha wipes his brow, the dry heat wafting in through the open door of the garage. He needs the draft though, when there was the occasional breeze that manage to keep him cool. He is determined to finish. Nikau has been dying for a jukebox style dresser. It does not go with the soccer paraphernalia plastered across his room, but Koha’s not one to try and make sense of his brother’s decor sense. Though both his parents tried to talk the little boy out of it, Nikau stuck to his guns. 

Calum and Harlowe tried to find one online, nothing too expensive, since who knew when the boy would grow tired of it. But nothing was coming up. So Koha offered to make him one. He liked working with his hands, he said it’d be a birthday gift, if Calum and Harlowe were okay with going in for half on the supplies. Calum did a step better and paid for it. Koha had money from his gig at the cinema. But he wasn’t going to argue with his father on that. Calum did it because he knew the amount of time it would take Koha to do it and he was touched that Te Koha would work this out. 

Koha turns the sander off, setting it aside to look over the final piece before he can prime and paint. Running a hand over the wood, it’s smooth. He slips the dust mask down right as a knock sounds. 

“How’s it going?”

Koha looks up to see Nikau standing in the opening of the garage that faces the driveway. “Good.” He waves his brother over. “Come here. You can put the last piece in place, yeah?”

“Really?” Nikau asks, eyes growing in excitement. 

“Really really. Now, c’mon.” 

Nikau speeds into the room, steps carefully the cables. “We gotta make sure this fits.” Nikau pulls over the stepstool and carefully grabs the wood as it’s put over his head. “Have you put the dowels in?” 

“Not yet.” Koha watches as the wood sits perfectly. Then he grins down to Nik. “Fits like a dream. “You can help me put them in, if you want?”

The little boy nods, the back of his head tapping lightly against Koha’s chest. The pair work twisting in dowels, unaware of their father’s presence. Calum leans against the garage door that leads into the house, arms folded across his chest. “So how are we going to paint it?” Nikau asks. 

“Esha said she had some designs. We’ll ask her after dinner, I guess.”

“I want it neon! Yeah! That’ll be cool, right, Koha?”

The older boy nods. “Yeah, super cool.”

It goes silent. Koha playfully ruffles Nik’s hair, earning him a huff from the young boy. Nikau gives his loose curls a shake to undo Koha’s mess of his hair. “Alright, boys. Dinner time,” Calum says. His boys turn around and nod at their father. Nikau climbs into the house first, gently bumping against Calum’s hip. Calum falls into the wall, huffing a little in an over exaggeration. “Watch it. I’m fragile!”

Nikau chuckles at the antic.  Calum does it every time. “You can take a hip. It’s not your fingers or voice.” He skips out the way of Calum’s reach, before he can be tickled. “Gotta clean up!” he beams.  Te Koha cleans his hands off, before putting the garage door down and closing the second door that leads outside. 

“It’s coming along nicely,” Calum notes, walking further into the garage. He looks at the wooden frame. He knows once it’s prime and painted it’s gonna be amazing. 

“Neon lights would make it pop,” Koha mutters. “Just don’t have the time.” 

Calum looks to his eldest, much like him. Maybe too much like him, Calum thinks. Always hyper critical of himself, always thinking of something better, a way to improve. As if right now is not enough. “Next time. Besides, this is amazing. You’re making an actual dresser. From scratch. That’s pretty incredible.”

“Thanks Dad.”

“Te Koha David Hood,” Harlowe bellows before her head pops around the corner of the door molding. “You’re a rock star,” she shouts. Then her voice lowers to normal,  “And it’s time to eat. For all your hard work, I made peach cobbler.”

“Thank, Mom.”

“Of course. Don’t be too long, boys.” 

“Good thing she doesn’t yell too often right?” Calum teases. Koha lets his laughter escape him. He honestly is too accustomed to the shouts of his mother. The house feels a little emptier when she’s gone for conferences. Though Esha for sure picks up the slack. Dinner goes as every other dinner does. Nikau and Esha talk to the most, animated while recreating their days at school or out with friends. Te Koha goes last. His days go about the same, or at least they appear to to his parents. 

“Today was fine.” Sometimes he’ll se good if something exciting happened. But most days are just fine. “I passed that maths exam. Didn’t do stellar, but I passed. Teacher will let me work over those problems I got wrong for half points to add back to the score.”

Harlowe nods. She knows the trig and Te Koha aren’t the best of friends. He does well in all his subjects, but this year has been a little tricky for him. “Well that’s good. You staying after tomorrow then?”

He nods. “I’ll stay until Esha’s done with her rehearsals and bring us both back home.” 

“Are we painting my dresser this weekend?” Nikau asks, reaching for another spoonful of green beans. One of his favorite veggies. Getting him to try new foods is still a struggle so they stick to the knowns for him though they slowly introduce new things. 

“Of course we are!” Esha cheers, reaching across like she’s going for some extra helping of potatoes. In reality she’s going in for the roll off Koha’s plate when her mother’s gaze is turned away. Te Koha doesn’t care for them but instead of fussing when Harlowe puts one on his plate, he just smiles. Esha takes it for him and splits it with Nikau, next to her. 

Calum knows. He always knows and tries to keep Harlowe’s attention until the theft is complete. Thankfully he doesn’t have to work to hard because Jack walks over, and sets himself down at her feet, creating the perfect distraction. Harlowe reaches down to scratch the top of her head. Calum knows that she knows about Te Koha and Esha’s deal. But rather than break the cycle, she places the roll and lets Esha take it without saying anything. 

At the dawn of the weekend, Calum wakes all too early in the morning, Harlowe still sleeping next to him on her back. He presses a kiss to her cheek and slips out of the bed. She’ll wake soon, feeling the shift of the mattress. But she will lay in bed for just a few more minutes. It’s about 6 but he can hear shuffling from across the hall. Then the stairs creak. Too heavy for Nikau. And it’s too early for Esha to even consider waking. Finishing up in the restroom, Calum waits at the door, listening to the alarm disarm itself. The front door opens, the alarm beeps twice to signal it. His first thought is that something is wrong. Though Te Koha can be an early riser, he’s never up before Calum. But rather than panicking, Calum slides into some basketball shorts, changes into a sweat resistant t-shirt and remembers that his running sneakers are downstairs. 

He slides into his sneakers and notices Te Koha in the backyard with the dogs, head tilted up to the sun. Te Koha can sense his father’s presence but doesn’t move. Much like his dad and Nana Jay, Te Koha and Calum share a silent language, a gut understanding of the other. “Wanna go for a run? We can take the dogs with us.”

“Sissy would not be down.”

“Sissy can keep up. But once Mum’s out of bed, we’ll take Pepper and Jack.”

“How is she? Like for real,” Koha asks, turning to face Calum. He remembers the years of watching her curl up into the sheets. He remembers the whole reason for the move. He overheard Harlowe’s breakdown in that bathtub. He was supposed to be asleep, but the sob woke him. Calum ran to the bedroom and Te Koha watched from the crack in his door. He waited a minute or two and then carefully walked into his parents bedroom, pressing his tiny ear to the bathroom door. The sound of his mother’s crying never ceased to break his heart. 

Calum drops his head for a moment. He can’t lie to his son. “She stopped taking her meds for a couple weeks there. She’s back on track, but it’s tough sometimes.”

“Why does she do it? She knows those meds work.”

“It’s-she thinks she can go without. And she knows she shouldn’t. She minored in Psychology in undergrad, you know that?” Te Koha shakes his head. “Yeah. She took enough classes though that she should’ve declared a second major. But didn’t turn in the paperwork in time.She knows good and well she because she takes meds and goes to therapy that her chance of relapse is greater. But the brain’s a powerful organ. It fools us all sometimes.”

It’s understood that Te Koha shouldn’t say anything about this. And normally he wouldn’t. He would press this information deep into himself and keep his lips closed. He would instead push her pill bottle closer to her in the mornings. He’ll count the number of pills when she’s gone. He’d ask Calum about the number of refills. He would ask about therapy. But he’s tired. He’s tired of holding secrets, of keeping his mouth shut. A tap sounds from the glass of the backdoor. Harlowe waves, signaling to both of them that’s she’s out of bed before turning and disappearing further into the house. 

This is it, the time of silence is over. Te Koha steps up onto the deck, walking right past the questioning stare of his father. This isn’t about Calum. This is about his mother. He steps into the house, words barreling over his tongue. “Do you know that I don’t like rolls and let Esha takes them?” he asks to his mother’s back. That’s an easy confession. 

Her hair scarf is still on, but she’s in a sweatshirt and lounge pants. “I know,” she says, still walking into the kitchen. “Would you like me to stop?”

“Do you know that Dad tells me when you stop taking your meds? Do you know that all of us can tell? Nikau, Esha, Pepper, Jack, Sissy--all of us.”

She pulls the fridge open, stepping back with the brita filter in her grasps. “I know.” Her voice is quiet. She puts the filter down on the counter and turns around. “I know because you look at me different when I do. You look at me like you did when you were 5 and thought my depression was your fault. You walked into our old garage and cried, apologizing and saying you would do better. What happened wasn’t your fault and never has been.”

“I know it’s not my fault. I know that now.” Te Koha walks closer to her, pausing a couple steps from her. She looks up to him, eyes watering. He may favor her physically, but his soul is all Calum. She takes his hand, pulling him into a hug. She wishes she could undo all the fear put in him from her own demons. She swore to herself that she would do her best to protect all of her children. But she was the one to hurt him. Not intentionally, not maliciously, but she had done it nonetheless. Te Koha folds into her embrace, feeling the slight tremor to her hands. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I keep hurting you after I promised I wouldn’t.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Ma. You don’t have to hide either. You told me how you got pregnant with me before marrying Dad. You told me that Dad and you nearly didn’t make it. You tell me so much and yet, you hide this. Something that you can’t control.”

“I’m your mother. It’s my job to worry about you. You aren’t to worry about me.”

“Of course I worry about you, Ma.”

“Momma’s just hardheaded, huh?”

“Just a little.” They embrace for a moment longer. “I love you,” he whispers to her. He wants no one but her to hear. Not even an ant, not the dogs, not his dad, not even the chill in the air. It is for Harlowe’s ears only. 

He reply is just as quiet in return. “I love you. With every ounce of me.” 

Te Koha slowly pulls back from his mother’s hold, wiping her tears from her cheeks. “You gotta take care of yourself. Who’s gonna nag me or shout in the house even though we’re not supposed to shout in the house? Who’s gonna give those bear hugs that make you feel like you chest will implode? Who’s gonna just put hair oil in my bathroom with little notes on what they’re good for? Who’s gonna do all that if you don’t take care of yourself?”

“Esha,” she says with a wobbly smile. “Well, she’ll definitely shout into the house.” Harlowe nods, sniffling hard. “I’ll take care of myself. I know I shouldn’t stop taking them. I know. I’m just human. Parents are human too. And you shouldn’t be so worried about me. You should be a kid, staying out late, getting drunk, stumbling home shambly.”

Te Koha laughs. He’s not shy about a pint here or there thanks to his Dad. He has friends. He is a still a kid. But he’s a kid that needs his mom. He’d be so lost without her. After things started getting good again, she’d pull him and Esha into her lap, playing with their hair. Their favorite movies on the TV screen. He remembers when they renewed their vows and he watched her dance. That propelled him to relearn the Haka. Thanks to Calum too and his encouraging words. Every birthday she made him cupcakes because he wasn’t a fan of cake. His was the biggest one, lemon with lemon icing.

When his crush in year 7 rejected him, she held him throughout the night, let him cry it out. She never tried to tell him she was too good looking, never tried to tell him that they were wrong. She held him, told him that his person was out there. She told him that it was okay that this hurt. Pain was not to be pushed down, but felt and dealt with it. He needs his mom. It’s as simple as that. “Funny you mention that,” Koha starts. “Ken and Davon and I might be going out tonight. So I wouldn’t wait up for me.”

Harlowe laughs. “But I surely will try to.”

“I know you will.”

After one last hug, Te Koha slides into his sneakers, grabbing the leash for Pepper and following behind Calum and Jack. They stretch for a few minutes, silent between them. The pavement in unforgiving beneath their sneakers, sending jolts up Te Koha’s bones. The air is crisp, warm, but not unforgiving. Pepper keeps pace next to Te Koha’s strides. He pushes past Calum without even realizing. “Keep up, old man,” he teases between pants. 

Calum grins at the taunt. “I’m old, not Superman. Let me be.”

As his feet slap the pavement, Te Koha considers telling his parents. He’s been seeing Davon for a few weeks now. But there’s something fun about having his own secrets. He holds so many others. But this one doesn’t hold him down. This one makes him feel alive, remember the way his lips feel against Koha’s. It’s only technically true that Ken, Davon and him are going out. It’s a double date, Davon and him with Ken and some girl. Koha’s yet to actually meet her. He’s seen in her passing around school, but they’ve never interacted much. She seems nice. But everyone seems nice. Ken’s track record isn’t the best. 

As they look back around to the last stretch of the block, Calum notes the way Te Koha’s head is not on his shoulders. It’s physically still attached, but he’s clearly mentally elsewhere. And not the bad kind either. The release is the best medicine, the unburdening of all the stuff inside is how people break free. The dogs are let inside for water and Koha heads to the detached shed. They converted that into a home gym. Calum follows behind him. He’s tired for sure, but he’s going to try and see if he can get to the bottom of this new good mood. 

“Pull up challenge?” Calum offers. 

Koha nods. “You will lose.”

“I’ve hoisted three babies for many years. I think I got this. But if you’re so confident,” Calum steps aside, waving his hand for Te Koha, “be my guest.”

Koha reaches for the bar, hops just a little to grab the bar. Koha pulls up for one, swings for the second. He gets through the seventh one before dropping from the bar. His face a little red and huffy. Calum’s got some weight on Koha. It’s bound to happen over the years, but he does his best to keep his weight down. He’s slowed on the beers. There’s not much liquor in the house because of Harlowe. Calum exhales deeply before taking more air in and then grabbing the bar. 

He pulls up, chin resting over the bar. He’s a push up guy but knows Koha’s been working to improve his pull-up strength. So here is his huffing to get past the sixth pull up. He gets up the seventh time and keeps pushing. Eight. Nine. Ten. He let’s go, feet planting to the ground. He’s still got it. Te Koha huffs, a smile lifting half his face. “Show off”

“Just mad you’re old man still got it.” Calum reaches out and squeezes Te Koha’s bicep. “You’re getting there though.”

“I mean you’re right. You’ve got some years on me. But I still think in the end, I’m going to have you beat.” Te Koha flexes. 

“I’m not sure about that,” Calum grins, flexing in return. 

“I’m polling this on Instagram.”

Calum laughs, rolling up the sleeve to his shirt. “It won’t be a fair fight. I’ve still got it with the ladies.” Calum pulls his phone from his pocket. They pose in front of the mirror, Te Koha in front of him slightly. Both flexing to show off their biceps. Calum puts a poll on the picture. Who’s got the better gains. Pops or son? 

When they enter the rest of the house, Harlowe’s sitting at the counter, pen in hand, reading over papers. Koha kisses her cheek, eying her last slice of cinnamon toast. “I made too much. Take the last one,” she hums not looking up from the page. 

“Thanks, Ma,” he grins chomping down on the slightly cold piece of bread. “Dad and I have a poll on instagram about who has the best biceps.’

Harlowe points the tip of her pen to Koha and he beams at his father. “She’s gotta say that,” Calum retorts with a smile. 

“I picked in a random direction, I swear,” she grins, finally looking up. She knows she didn’t. She picked Te Koha on purpose. “Love you Cal,” she calls out as he ascends the stairs. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he huffs. She can hear the grin in his voice. 

Once everyone is awake, Calum fixes a quick breakfast, pancakes, eggs and bacon. Nikau begs to start painting the dresser so Esha throws on an old shirt she took from Calum’s drawer many years ago and Harlowe sacrifices an old shirt of hers from when they painted the new house to put on Nikau, knowing for a fact he’ll ruin his own clothes. Esha takes charge once they’re settled into the garage. She outlines what sections needs to be painted what color. She lets Nikau paint the sides of the dresser. It requires less precision, the perfect job for a seven year old. 

“I’m going to miss you when you go,” Esha says to Te Koha. He leaves for uni soon. He won’t be too far away. Just far enough. “Who can I collude with to bring alcohol into the house?”

“You heard nothing, Nik,” Koha says with a wink. He winks back, understanding not to say a word. “I can come home on the weekends.”

“It’s just not the same, ya know. Your room will be empty,” she whispers, cleaning her brush before going back to detailing to make the top look like the song selections. 

“I know. I’ll be there for every show and every football game too. I love you guys.”

Esha holds the back of her hand to forehead. “My stars!” Koha marks her arm with the green paint on her arms. She retaliates with the white. 

“Paint the wood, not each other!” Nikau laughs. Both Esha and Te Koha eye each other before putting a mark on each of his arms. He scoffs and then swipes at Te Koha first before just barely getting Esha as she jumps out of the way. 

Calum and Harlowe can hear their laughter echoing from the garage. She sneaks to the garage door from the inside of the house. Cracking open the door, she can see her babies, covered in painting, smiles on their faces. Calum peeks over the top of her head and watches the scene too. They get about halfway done painting before calling it a day. Harlowe fixes dinner that day, lunch was a free all except Nikau who eats dinosaur nuggets and broccoli. 

Te Koha shouts at his departure that evening, hoping to avoid his mother’s spill. She shuffles down the hallway. “Don’t drink and drive, eat something, text you when I’m on my way back.”

She smiles and nods. “Is that Ken or Davon outside?”

“Davon. He’s got a meet tomorrow, so he’s not drinking.”

He waits for the hug, the kiss on the cheek. But she just smiles, arms folded against her chest. Her smile is different, a little shier than usual, as if holding something back. Te Koha’s heart hammers in his chest. She finally steps into him, kissing his cheek. “Tell Davon I said hi and next time, he can come inside.”

Te Koha nods, stepping through the door. He blinks rapidly, hands a little shaky. She must know. But he was sure he had been careful. As she settles back onto the couch into Calum’s side, he kisses the top of her head. “Think we should tell him we saw him last week with Davon at the gas station?”

Harlowe shakes her head. “No.” He knows she knows. He knows they’re okay with it; they love him all the same. But if he’s not ready to spil that secret, she will let him hold onto it. She will let him keep the secrets a teenager is supposed too. “Let him have that.”

Te Koha settles into the passenger seat of Davon’s car. He registers the kiss to his cheek but he’s still in shock. “Everything okay?” Davon asks, holding onto Koha’s hand for a moment. 

His parents know. But they won’t bring it up. They will let him have this. This is how he’ll still be a kid to them. His parents still love him; they want him to stay young. Tears are blurring his vision. “Yeah,” he sniffs. “I’m fine.”

“You’re crying baby. You sure?”

Te Koha’s laughter is inevitable. He’s sure. He’s more than sure. He’s so glad to have his mother, even in all her craziness. There’s no one else quite like her.

#calum hood #calum hood fanfic #calum hood fic #calum hood imagine #calum hood blurb #calum hood series #dad!cal #dad!cal series #5sos #5sos fanfic #5sos fic #5sos imagine #5 seconds of summer fanfic #5 seconds of summer fic #5 seconds of summer imagine #calum hood x black oc #h writes

[purplesurveys]

732

1. What is the reason you last got a new cell phone? The battery on my old 5S was getting frustratingly shitty and would die at 90%, and it would also take forever to boot up. It also reached a point where it was almost always hot to the touch. I always had to have a power bank with me and when that broke as well, it almost felt like I didn’t have a phone anymore because it would just be dead all the time.

2. Do you enjoy Math? I was always on extremes with it. Either I was making really excellent marks or I was failing badly, and I think it’s because performance in math depends on how well you understand and can apply the lessons. If you know the formulas it’s easy to pass the whole exam but if your memory is spotty, then that’s just a domino effect right there.

3. Are you more masculine or feminine? I’d say the lines are very blurred these days and I think it’s a very good thing, but I guess stereotypically I’m more feminine.

4. Has anyone ever told you that you’re their favourite? Sure, by best friends and close friends.

5. How many albums do you have by the band/artist you’re listening to? I don’t really pay close attention to the lo-fi scene and if their artists release albums at all, heh.

6. What are you doing tomorrow? Same old. Do a survey or two, maybe play the Switch, take a nap, have a coffee, maybe get a snack, practice Spanish.

7. Which name have you kissed the most people with? Have only kissed a Gabie.

8. Closest fast food place to your house? There’s a McDonald’s, Chowking, and Shakey’s right beside our village. If you’re willing to drive a little and take a u-turn there’s also a Burger King on the other side of the highway.

9. Does your city/town have a Taco Bell in it? No. I think only QC has Taco Bell, a shame.

10. Do you enjoy All You Can Eat buffets? Love them. Buffets make me so excited and happy.

11. Post a picture of yourself from about two years and three months ago: I was gonna say no to this but then I figured I used to post my photos all the time on my ancient Tumblr days, so whatever. This one was taken at my high school’s school fair and it’s the only photo I have of myself from January 2018. Blurred Gab out, for the curious.

12. Have you ever seen the band/artist you’re listening to live? I’ve never seen a lo-fi show, or know if those even exist.

13. Who was your best friend three years ago? The same ones I have three years later.

14. Do you enjoy hard drugs? Nope, not even interested in them.

15. Do you have any “e-buddies”? That means internet friends, right? I don’t have any < If this is what this means, I have Aliyah. Rafie and I don’t talk anymore but I still consider him a dear friend because of the time he gave me a free ticket to a WWE show when the roster came here in 2016.

16. Have you done anything productive today? It’s 1:19 AM, so no.

17. Do you enjoy sucking dick? I’ve never done that sksksksksksk. Don’t really have plans to.

18. Reason you last pulled an all-nighter? I just felt like doing it.

19. What design is on the last cup you used? It’s white but it has a black design of the wi-fi logo on it. If the beverage inside is hot the logo will turn bright blue to let you know it’s hot, but it gradually fades to black as it cools down.

20. Did you watch Garfield as a child? No.

21. Did you watch What-a-Mess? No, never heard of that one < Same. I only know Whataburger hahahahaha

22. Do you have a charm on your phone? No but I probs did on my old phones from childhood.

23. Last thing you bought over fifty dollars? Gabie’s Christmas gifts in total were over $50 (₱2500) but I don’t know if I’ve ever spent that amount on a single thing.

24. What colour is the last lighter you used? I don’t remember but it was either a neon green or pink.

25. Last thing you printed off a computer? A business article I needed to turn in for a journalism class.

26. Last thing you threw in the garbage? A sachet for 3-in-1 coffee.

27. Do you know anyone not related to you with your last name? Yeah I used to ride the bus with her. She’s like 6 years younger though so I never got to be friends with her.

28. How many band shirts do you have, and which ones? Just one, Paramore. I bought it with the emergency money my mom gave me for my first Paramore gig (like for food and drinks) so you can imagine how angry she was when I pissed it all away for a shirt.

29. What are you happiest about this year so far? I got to have a wild party with my friends literally a week before the lockdown. I’m glad I got to have such an experience with them, cause it’s something I never got to do throughout college.

30. Last black person you hugged? I’ve never hugged any black people, come to think of it.

31. Last cut/injury you received? I have a weird cut on my right ring finger that I have no clue from where it came. It’s not bothersome but it will sometimes sting if it’s hit with water.

32. Do you shave your leg all at once, or do you do it in halves? I don’t know what shaving legs in half is supposed to mean lmao but when I shave, I shave the whole leg?

33. Is life hard? Well it’s definitely not supposed to be easy.

34. Who does the song you’re listening to remind you of? These days lo-fi reminds me of taking surveys because... well, it’s what I listen to when I take surveys.

35. Last message you received? Kaye very randomly asked me just now if pro wrestling was truly staged and after I explained it to her I asked her why she was thinking of that at this hour, and the last message I got was her explanation.

36. Do you eat your vegetables? I looooove them.

37. Is Nutella amazing? It’s not groundbreaking on its own but I’d drop money on a Nutella-flavored snack, you know what I mean? I find it too sweet if I eat it by itself so I need other elements to balance it out.

38. Have you ever had anything pierced that isn’t anymore? No. My ear piercings are still open even after not hanging earrings from them anymore in a decade.

39. Would you consider yourself “tough”? In a sense that I had to grow up earlier than most kids due to the shitty stuff I saw in childhood and in a sense that I can handle most traumatic or triggering situations with ease, sure.

40. Headphones or earbuds? Earbuds.

[09yards]

6 - Colouring Outside the Lines (days gone by - nct)

Days Gone By masterlist | main masterlist

The remainder of August passed like nothing ever happened, school started up again far too quickly and maybe, just maybe, Mark would get his fresh start and life could go back to ‘normal’. But really, what is normal anymore? Between Renjun and Jaemin figuring out where they stand with one another, Hyuck pretending like everything’s okay and the brother Mark feels like he barely knows anymore, Mark feels too busy to get a second chance to think about anything other than his exams. Autumn always brings about change, for some its for the better – for others, not so much.

They say time slips away when you’re having fun, that’s why you said let’s change our life to a dull one Don’t wanna blink one day and this will all be over, if only time could stop so we’d never grow older

Yet in the same breath I look forward to the day when our skin has aged, I’ll love you just the same Our canvas will have endless hues and shades because of all the vivid colours that we made

Mark always liked Autumn the most out of the seasons, the softer weather, no longer having to deal with the obnoxious sun, trees turning from electric greens to an array of dusky oranges. The air was crisper, a little harsher and with it came the rain but Mark never minded rain, perhaps it was the memories of walking Jisung home from middle school with Johnny, running and laughing as the rain poured over them – having forgotten their umbrellas that morning. Their mum always berating them for being so careless, complaining and nagging that they could make themselves sick. Collapsing through the door, out of breath, changing out of their now soaked through uniforms and curling up with hot chocolates in an attempt to increase their body temperature. They didn’t get to do that anymore. Johnny was at university, although only an hour away, but far enough that technically he didn’t live here anymore, at least not from September until June, Jisung went to the same school as Mark now and refused to drive in with him, still taking the bus – arguing he liked his ‘quiet time’. Mark remembers the bus, the bus is not in any way, shape or form, quiet. Jisung was fiercely independent, everyone knew this, he kept to himself as much as possible bar the three friends Mark knew he’d had since pre-school, Beomgyu, Samuel and Linlin, who even with their ten-year friendship, Mark knew very little about each of them. Frankly, he didn’t know much about his younger brother, not as much as he’d like to at least. Sure, Mark could tell you he has an extremely varied music taste, currently enjoying BTS and Black Pink but also the likes of panic! At the disco and Vinyl Theatre, he seems to be obsessed with HONNE at the minute if the constant playing of crying over you or location unknown was anything to go by, Mark could tell you that he prefers grey or muted tones rather than colour, knew that Jisung hates tomatoes but doesn’t mind tomato flavoured things, but Mark didn’t learn these things because he was told them, they were just things he’d picked up on. They didn’t talk anymore. Mark didn’t know what TV show he was currently binging, or what his favourite film at the minute is. Mark didn’t know the youngers opinions on his soulmate mark, he couldn’t remember the last time he heard Jisung ranting about Johnny and Ten and the damage they do to his innocence.

Jisung felt like a stranger to Mark these days, not someone he once couldn’t be separated from. Maybe that was a bit of a stretch but they were close, just how you’d imagine siblings to be. Sure, they fought and squabbled over who really won at Mario Kart but for a long time they really were each other’s best friend.

It was sad really. Beginning to feel like you lived alongside a stranger, passing each other in the hallway or across the landing but no time for anything more than a quick ‘hello’ or a mumbled, half-arsed ‘good morning’ from either of the brothers. It would also be much better if Mark wasn’t thinking about all of this at four am when he had a chemistry test at nine and while half of his brain is making him feel guilty about how he’s been a shitty brother and too preoccupied with his exams, the other half of his brain is running through Born-Haber cycles and it only made him feel worse. Marks realising that even though its barely October, he’s become exactly who he didn’t want to be, he drowns himself in work and when he’s not studying thermodynamics or the freaking nitrogen cycle he’s attempting to get some sleep or sometimes , just sometimes, he’s actually active in the group chat and is able to somewhat keep up with Renjun and Jaemin’s developing relationship but most importantly he’s gotten used to Donghyuck pretending like not a thing had happened back in August. Donghyuck left that morning, within two days he was back to messaging the group chat (also known as ‘Beyoncé’s bad bitches’ - yes, it was named by Jaemin, Renjun is still mad he wasn’t allowed to call it ‘a guide to crackheads, volume 101’ and Hyuck wanted to call it ‘hoes mad’. Mark did not agree to any of these names and continues to hide his phone whenever his mum is around - he has never flipped it over so fast than when his mum walks into the room, his friends have a habit of setting their own contact names to inappropriate phrases, i.e. Jaemin’s (again) current contact name is ‘your guide to getting that dick 101’, is there not a limit on the number of characters?) like everything was fine, starting out with his fist message about why on earth did he have homework over the summer, the summer. Weren’t you supposed to relax and ‘blow off some steam’?

Mark’s brain was in a state of overflow, uni application due here, maths test next week, chemistry exam today , start spending more time with your brother before you get even busier and he needs someone right now without Johnny around and deal with stupid feelings for Donghyuck knowing full well that they are unrequited tomorrow.

“Hey Mark? Can you come pick me up?”

“Sure, what time?”

“Now?” Panic, panic, panic.

“Yeah sure. Is everything okay? You sound kinda wobbly?”

“I’m fine. I’m down the backroad behind the park, I’m waiting at the end of the road.”

“Okay, I’m grabbing my keys and I’ll be on my way.”

Mark’s guide on how not to panic was a short one, it consisted of ‘breathe and don’t freak other people out’. He only had a ten-minute car journey to figure out how to calm down. Jisung was in trouble . There is no way he would’ve called otherwise and considering he could’ve walked home and it would only take an extra five minutes, something was clearly wrong. Hence, Mark’s brain has gone into instant panic mode. He wasn’t good at dealing with people or emotions, especially when he had no idea why his brother was down this road – none of his friends lived here, at least not as far as he could recall. Mark definitely broke the speed limit more than once (or four) times, his baby brother wasn’t okay.

Jisung looked glum. His eyes were read and puffy, visible even though Mark was a few metres away from him, his posture was sluggish and he looked broken . Jisung’s face didn’t light up upon seeing Mark, although he did look a little less panicked, instead he practically dragged his body into the car, slouching in his seat and saying “Just go,” before turning up the Twice song currently playing (what is love? Mark’s brain supplied).

“Are we going to sit in silence and pretend like everything’s fine or is this the point where instead of Twice we listen to The Neighbourhood, Chase Atlantic and The 1975 and you tell me what’s going on so I don’t have to call Johnny or mum ?” Yeah, Mark was not good at the whole authority figure thing but he did remember all the things Johnny did for him. Mark remembers his first crush, the boy was not gay and Mark, stupidly, told this boy, Daniel, that he was. Daniel was one of the first people Mark came out to and well, he didn’t take it well. Accused him of ‘tainting’ him, trying to make him gay. So, Mark, teary-eyed and heartbroken, rang Johnny who came to pick him up. Johnny sat with him in the car at the lookout, blasting Mr Brightside by The Killers until Mark was ready to talk. That was when Johnny taught Mark about how there are some really, really great people who will run around waving pride flags for you and do everything they can to make you comfortable (like Lucas) and there are some people who are stupid and are not-so-great, some people don’t like it and that’s okay, they’re entitled to their opinion, Johnny had said, they’re just wrong. Mark was thirteen at the time and quickly learnt that some problems (aka stupid crushes on boys that are tall, have fluffy hair and chocolate-coloured eyes) can be solved with a tub of Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream and some crying while listening to Taylor Swift, not that Mark would ever admit his secret love for her.

“There’s a boy,” Jisung mumbled, “I think I like him? I don’t know. I ran out of his house after he hugged me and I panicked.” Oh. My. God. This was happening, okay Mark, you can do this.

“Does he make you happy?”

“So happy. He smiles at me and I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. We get along really well, he doesn’t find my playlists weird and he already knew every Twice member and most of the artists I was listening to and he thinks I’m cute and he pinches my cheeks and I don’t hate it.”

“You hate when anyone touches you without permission, usually?”

“I usually do. But, not him. I want to pinch his cheeks too. He has a gummy smile, it’s so cute. He has purple hair too! I really want to try purple, he said I’d look good with pink though so now I really want to try pink hair because he likes it. What is happening to me Mark?”

“You’ve got a crush Sungie.”

“Like you and Hyuck?”

“Yeah, like me and Hyuck. You feel the room brighten a little when he walks in and he makes you a little breathless when he gets too close, right?”

“Right! I’m gay aren’t I. This is the moment I realise I’m gay, huh, though it’d be a bit more exciting.”

“You’ve got plenty of time to explore what you want to, or not, label yourself as Sungie. But you do have a crush on a boy . It’s not the end of the world and no, he won’t hate you.”

“But I don’t know if he’s gay? I’d feel bad if he wasn’t and I tried to confess.”

“I honestly have no idea who we’re talking about so I couldn’t tell you if I had an inkling or not but you’ll figure it out. Talk to him, that’s the only way to get through these things. You can panic and run away all you like but you can’t avoid him forever, trust me, I’ve tried one too many times.”

“Okay. Thank you. Do you think this means Ten’s going to drag me to pride now?”

Mark let out a sigh, “We both know everyone was going whether they wanted to or not. Come on, let’s get ice cream and watch a movie. If you’ve got any questions you can always come to me, unless its sex stuff – I’m not ready for that, go to Johnny, you’re a baby so there better be no sex stuff for a long, long time.”

“Oh my god Mark,” Jisung groaned, “you do not have to worry about that stuff. Please just drive, I want cookie dough. And, we’re playing Mario Kart! Dibs on Yoshi.” With one last chuckle, Mark turned back to look at the younger, his own smile widening upon seeing a veryembarrassed but grinning Jisung. They would figure this out, together.

- - -

“You like me and my cold hands,” Jaemin whined, “maybe, you could warm them up for me. Don’t look at me like that, you loveee me.”

“Har-har, have I mentioned how funny you are lately? No? Wonder why that is. Come here you idiot.” Jaemin wrapped his arms around the smaller, allowing Renjun to bury his head into his chest, one of the only places the younger emitted warmth.

“See, told you that you love me.” I do, not that I’d tell you that.

“Renjun? Hey, you’re going to get a sore back if we don’t move.”

“I don’t want to.”

“What did you say? Renjun you can’t speak into me; I can’t hear you.”

“I said, I don’t want to go. I like it here, you’re warm.”

“Not even ten minutes ago you were whining that I’m cold.”

“I said your hands; your hands are always cold but you seem to radiate heat from everywhere else. Wait, aside from your feet too, they’re always cold, whenever they touch me in bed, I feel like an icicle.”

“You’re just always cold, you wear hoodies in August .” Now, as much as Renjun likes to dispute most comments made about him, he couldn’t argue against this. It may be October now and the cold weather has well and truly set in but, Renjun was always cold – four layers even when the current temperature was reading eighteen degrees, almost hot for an Autumn day. It worked as the perfect excuse to curl up into people (Jaemin) in search of warmth.

“There is nothing wrong with that,” Renjun huffed, “I’m just naturally colder than like, everyone.”

“I like that you’re cold, it gives me the excuse to cuddle you into oblivion and it makes you squirm when I do this-“

“AAH! STOP!” Icy hands were tickling at Renjun’s sides, making their way under his shirt, Renjun squirming and giggling, breathlessly panting for Jaemin to stop.

“Speak clearly Injun, I can’t hear you.” The grin on Jaemin’s face would make your cheeks hurt, wide with pure joy and his eyes filled with love as he flipped their positions, hovering over Renjun as he continued to tickle him to no end. “What was that? Did you say you wanted me to stop?”

“Jaeminnie please,” his voice was wheezy, trying to catch his breath whenever Jaemin’s hands paused their movement.

“Okay, okay. I have a better idea anyway,” and with that, his voice dropped an octave, away from his usual singsong tone to darker and husky. He dropped his head into the crook of Renjun’s neck, leaving light, feathery kisses where he could before moving under his ear and up his jaw, planting kiss after kiss on the expanse of Renjun’s face. God, Jaemin gave the best forehead kisses.

“Yep,” another sigh left Renjun’s lips, “definitely a better idea.” Jaemin finally connected their lips, breath tangling with one another’s, lips chasing each other whenever they parted for breath. It was needy but soft, like they were treasuring every moment of it, holding onto it.

A short while later Jaemin, having left Renjun with lips slightly swollen, much pinker than they were before and his neck littered with reddening marks, pulled away.

“We need to talk.” Renjun wasn’t a fan of this tone of voice, it wasn’t singsong and melodic like normal, nor was it huskier and darker than when he was breathless. This tone was rigid, void of emotion.

“S-sure?” It made Renjun feel small, like he was vulnerable, almost like whenever he got in trouble with his parents as a child.

Jaemin moved from hovering over him, instead opting to sit next to him. He let out a sigh, running his hand over his face, “I can’t keep doing this,” his voice was wobblier now, “we can’t keep going around like this not knowing if we’re soulmates or not. We could be hurting people. I have a soulmate mark and you don’t, maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be – you’re my soulmate but, I am not yours.” Jaemin continued to rant on like this, saying that it wasn’t fair, that he didn’t want to live like this.

“Jesus Jaemin, will you let me speak for one second, please?”

“Oh, right, uhm. Yeah, sorry, go ahead.” The way Jaemin could turn from dominant and flirtatious, arrogant and stern to a complete utter mess never ceased to amaze Renjun.

“You’re an idiot, a complete and utter idiot.”

“Now, I don’t think that’s fair- “

“No, it is,” Renjun leant down to tug his sock off, his soulmate mark out of hiding, “look at me, stop burying your face in your hands and look at me.”

“I’m embarrassed Renjun, I think I have every right to not want to look at you.”

“Oh my god, I would not put up with you if you weren’t my soulmate.”

“What?” Jaemin’s head snapped up at that, glassy eyes meeting Renjun’s before darting down to where Renjun’s leg was crossed over into his lap, revealing his soulmate mark in all its super tiny glory. Angel written in a minimalistic print along his ankle. “You’re kidding, h-how could you not tell me?” A lone tear escaped the corner of his eye and god, Renjun was so damn in love with this boy.

“I didn’t know how to tell you, Hyuck said you cried for three hours about how I didn’t have a soulmate mark. I couldn’t exactly turn around and be like ‘hey Jaemin, I know we’ve been making out at least three times a week since prom night and we’re not together officially or anything but you are actually my soulmate , you’re just a dumbass who didn’t take my socks off and I’m madly in love with you’. Do you see my issue there?”

“Nope, you definitely should’ve done that. I could’ve been kissing you every day of the week. I liked you before, regardless of whether or not we were soulmates, sure I knew since I met you because wow, you’re you and then I just- “

“Shut up and kiss me already.”

“This means we’re boyfriends, right?”

“Not if you don’t kiss me in the next three seconds.”

“Jesus, so bossy!”

“You love it.”

“That I do.”

“I love you too.”

#markhyuck #markhyuck fic #nct fic #nct #nct fanfic #nct fluff #nct donghyuck #nct haechan #nct mark #nct dream #nct 127 #nct u #johnten #renmin #chensung #dojae #luqi #nct blurb #nct timestamps #ten nct #nct johnny #nct qian kun #nct jaehyun #nct doyoung #nct jisung #nct chenle #nct jungwoo #nct lucas #nct yuta #nct winwin

[ajeevan]

10/19/19

9:53 AM

On my way to work. 5.5h.

I'm working like 51h this month. Had holidays so that's why I could work so much but from now on I should have like 15h a week.

I did some math this morning and if I work like 8h for 6 days a week for like 2 months after I finish school and combine that with the work I'll be doing till then I should have enough money for the first year of school. For the student accommodation and stuff. Still need a loan for the school.

But none of this matters if I can't start next September.

Gotta pass the CAE and have my grades accepted and then do well in the workshop.

Work is going to fuck me up. 8h a day. Standing and dealing with shit. Gotta make sure I get enough sleep and also try to make the most of the hours I have left for stuff I like.

I paid attention in math yesterday and actually understood some of the shit. That's how it always goes. I pay attention right after the exam and then dgaf afterwards. I usually get the first half of stuff we talk about and nothing of the 2nd half.

But I got a good bad grade in the last one. Was expecting worse.

Gotta prepare this fucking art presentation. Got another art presentation along with a German book presentation in 2 weeks. I finished the book. First time. Read the shit. I gotta see how much I'll work on the art presentation tonight. Might not be much. Will get back around 6. So maybe spend 1h writing down everything I want to say so I can then use that to make the PowerPoint presentation and the handout.

Got 3h of Work tomorrow. So trying to get this shit done by tomorrow 5 PM. Don't want to spend the entire night on it tomorrow.

#work #school #cae #Cambridge #vfx #grades #hustle #Workshop #ucas application #rent #grind #hard work

[capriciouswriter207]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I've, I've been away from this place for so long. I haven't had the time to even try and catch up for so long. Now I may got Easter holidays but I've no idea how much time I'll have free to read stuff. The thought of trying to catch up with things by back reading is a bit scary ngl.

The last few weeks I've been studying a LOT for Latin and after the Latin exam like half of both saturday and day day I studied for math and wrote it today. I actually got a feel that this Latin exam won't be a 6(worst grade) but maybe a 5+ (the translation which I didn't focus on in studying because harder to catch up on weights more than the grammar and cultural part sadly) and the math exam won't be a 5 but instead something around 3, unless I made myself to a clown and just thought I understand the tasks xD.

Other than that I will need to still draw a portrait in my style of someone for Easter gift, gonna try to at least partly use ink and I'm a bit nervous because I never used my ink drawing set before. So that means I'll have to practice a bit with that too. I might do the practice stuff in combination with the request for drawings stuff in my story that I'm planning on doing.

Anyway tomorrow am gonna go to get glasses, we'll get them made practically. I was supposed to go to a doctor for exact stuff but yeah, Corona.

I hope you and all the anons have been well, other than not having enough time for a lot of stuff I've been quite well personally.

-Star

Hi, good to see you again!

Don't feel pressured to catch up, it's... a lot, I know. I post a lot. Maybe a little too much sometimes. You can catch up in your own time, whenever that is. I'll assume 5 or lower are passing grades and I hope you passed those exams.

And now you've brought it up, I absolutely hated Latin teachers who made the translation (discussed in class) weigh more than grammar or culture. I don't know, it's always bugged me; you can easily just try to memorize a translation with some key words from the Latin text to reproduce it perfectly. It doesn't really say much about your skills in translation or how good you are with Latin, just about how well you could memorize it. Which is why I hated my 11th grade Latin teacher, he expected us to perfectly reproduce the translations on tests and exams and deducted points even for changing up sentence structure or not using the exact same verb as we used in class (i.e. using "replied" instead of "responded"). Decent teacher, just a pain when it came to grading that part.

Anyway, rant aside, I'm glad you're doing well. Enjoy the Easter break and good luck with drawing.

#message board #didn't mean to rant a little about that teacher #but it happened

[0ompa-loompa]

Assignments, final projects, try-outs, mock weeks, finals, college applications, these are what senior year is made of. Naturally, it’s the period of time when you most feel the urge to jump off a cliff. From the first week of school, I could already see the differences senior year brought to my school mates. People were starting to realize that they had to receive great marks, they had to get accepted into good colleges, they had to do this and that as ways to an accomplished future.

Over the years of being a high school student, every time there was a free period, or just any studying-free moment at school, we would watch movies, gossip, or simply be on our phones for hours. Now in every free periods, my classmates would take out these heavy-ass books that can be used comfortably as pillows and actually study. Or re-write their notes. Or revise a subject for next week’s quiz. Anything to keep them working (just curious, do these symptoms apply to all senior year students around the world?).

Since junior year were pretty traumatizing for me (thanks to student government), I had been planning all holiday to give my 110% for senior year. Long story short, I hit it off since day 1 and came out alive six months later. Although it resulted in me spending 3 days sleeping in after end-of-term exams were over, I’m really happy for having been very productive this entire term. I know there’s still 6 months left and the worst parts are yet to come, so I decided to share a few tips exclusively coming from someone *glares at myself* who did remarkably awful the previous year and somehow found a way to crawl back from death

1.       Know Where You’re Going

Getting to the very last year of high school, this is the MOST important part of surviving. Without having your long-term goal, it would be like taking down hundreds of obstacles without having a destination in mind. You don’t know where you’re going, but more monsters keep showing up on your path. Trust me, you’ll eventually get tired and stop trying midway. Losing motivation when you’re in the most vital part of your study can’t be a good thing.

Do research on the degrees you’re interested in taking, from their passing grades to job prospects. Make sure you actually enjoy the subjects needed for those degrees. For example, if you can’t stand Biology, better if you don’t consider attending medical school, and the same goes to other subjects as well.

2.       Maintain Productivity

The amount of school work you’re getting can be overwhelming, that is why you have to do them as soon as possible to prevent them from piling up. You don’t have to finish them all in one day, it’s impossible and careless. At least try to do them bits by bits until the night before due when you can go over what you’ve done and fix a few imperfections or cross-check your answers. Try doing this to multiple assignments instead of focusing on one or two assignments the entire week.

I usually bring unfinished assignments to school so I can get to work when I have free time, usually before after-school extras, or while waiting for an extra course. This way instead of going on Tumblr for hours, I’ll be figuring out math problems and (hopefully) have the homework done by ½ when the course starts.

3.       Gather Motivation

Take a look at that magnificent building, I will build tens of those once I become an architect. Have you seen the latest VSxBalmain collection? I’ll someday be working alongside Olivier Rousting .

It’s very important to keep being productive and use every free time wisely. While you’re at it, make sure to keep your motivate-o-meter at high level. Motivation and inspiration can come from anyone, anywhere and it doesn’t even have to come from anything relevant to your life goals. I usually get a boost of motivation after watching a couple videos of my favorite Youtubers (which has no correlation whatsoever to being an engineer), and I recently  got a huge inspo from reading Crazy Rich Asians. It seriously motivated me to work my ass off and be rich.

4.       Don’t Stop ‘til You’re Proud

Catch up on things you don’t fully understand. If you had a problem with certain subjects or materials, find the answers right away, don’t wait until the day before quizzes or mock tests when you will desperately need answers. Ask teachers, your friends, or our most trusty friend the internet. You can also download several applications to help you study, like Khan Academy and other similar apps. Once you put one problem out of sight, it will become easier for you to put more aside . This is what happened to me last year, I had problems understanding Chem but I refused to actually figure them out, thinking I would learn the materials later. 10 laters later, I got a 7 for end-of-semester test while my classmates received 9s and 8s.

So you have studied for this particular test and still got a bad mark. Shit happens honey, tough it up. Even while I’m writing this, I fully understand that the theory of ‘picking-yourself-up’ is much easier said than done. Give yourself some time to breathe, and start with “okay, where did I go wrong?”. Figure out the errors to make sure you’re not doing them the second time. Consider it this way: the subject has betrayed you and you’re getting a revenge. I planted this idea the very first day of senior year, the thought has driven me to never quit trying. It’s almost like Elle Woods to Warner, but instead it’s me and Physics.

5.       Get A Rest.

Senior year doesn’t mean you lose all hope of going on shopping sprees, watching the latest movies, or taking care of your Tumblr blog. If anything, I’ve watched more movies with my friends this year than I did previous years, simply because we have little time to relax so we made the most of one when we had the chance to. As long as you keep track on your to-do-list, stay discipline on your schedule, a little catch up on KUWTK won’t hurt.

Don’t push yourself to the point of falling down. Read books, paint, dance, even play games (Mobile Legend is the hype these days it’s getting annoying), anything to keep you sane and motivated. Never let the pressure of GPAs and prestigious colleges take positivity away from you.

6.       Don’t Over-Rest.

Yes, hun, I was just telling you to enjoy your senior year and now I’m telling you to not over-relax your way. Maintain a schedule, make agreements with yourself and stick to it. “At 8pm I will start on Math homework, and the rest is for tomorrow”. “I will work my butts off from 8 to 10 am then I can go on Tumblr”. “I will start on my History papers and take a rest after 2 pages”.

I’m not telling you to work 24/7 because that’s not healthy, I’m ALSO not telling you to spend all your weekend in bed and procrastinate because it would defeat the whole purpose of learning to be productive. Once you let yourself procrastinate, It’ll be easier for you to do it for the second, third, and fourth time.  Sometimes you just need to gather your will, get up and face those text books.

Well, there you go. These are all the things I have been doing to not only survive, but to do well in high school. I have been doing all these tips religiously for the past 6 months, it’s almost impossible not to feel tired or even want to just cut it off. But studying routinely makes me feel in control of what’s happening currently, what’s going to happen next, what I want to be doing in the future. So get up and let’s kick asses together.

#eintstetic #focusign #heysareena #acadmia #studyign #studyblr #blog #eintsein #athenastudying #studyquill #academiix #heyscholarly #creatingnotes #intellectys #lycheestudy #intellctuals

[simbagos]

I haven't really been active this week because ✨first week of classes✨

Everyday i start at 8 in the morning -so i leave my house at about 7- and i finish at 17 -i arrive at about 18:15. Which is honestly just depressing lol. But i like i'm learning how to drive i've been arriving home later than usual while still having to do homework. Not even a week has passed and i've already got a grade (19/20 😏 i'm such a killer machine lol/jk). Anyways, if you've seen something you know i'll like don't hesitate to tag me. I've only been active like 5 mins twice this week, in the bus.

Would you like a small description of what i've done? no? you'll get one anyway

On monday i only did 2 hours because the first day they just tell us our class and give us our timetable. I had a bomb outfit, like seriously, i looked stunning. My class is virtually the samee as last year -which is good because i already know all of them and i am on good terms with my classmates.

Tuesday-Friday: nothing frightfully interesting happened. I met my teachers. They give us the same boring discourse like every year "you will have to work, you are adults now, there is no time to waste because we need to prepare the exams for march, you will have to pick where to study next year, you have got the bac, etc...". Results, we haven't done much except in science omg. We have literally finished a chapter this week! 🤯 And maths!

What is worth mentionning is that i started philosophy this year and i think it will be interesting with our vampire-like professor, very elitist, very mush somebody with favourites. Lucky for me it seems to be myself! Mainly because on friday i went to the school library and he (the teacher) was sitting having tea with my greek teacher and the librarian. I said hi to them, and both the librarian and the greek teacher said hi to me by name (i spend a huge amount of time there and i have know the greek teacher for like 6 years now).So he took a special interest in me the fours of us had a small conversation. Nothing essential, just telling you what happened lol.

I don't really know where i was going with this, i forgot. I'm exhausted. Ah! i just remembered.

For the last two weeks i have been training for a concert with the orquestra. Today we practised for 8 hours! My back is absolutely dead,but the music sounds great and i can;t wait for the concert tomorrow at noon! Wish me good luck! :)

Anyways, i hope all of you had a good week and that you will have a good week next week lol

#simbagos irl #school #lol this looks more like my diary than a tumblr post

[drybonesawaken]

A group of people wanted to share a journal together. So this week, I've been journaling (almost) every day, and tomorrow I'm gonna be passing it onto the next person.

It was kinda fun. Bit scary to put my thoughts out there - but not that bad tbh. I figured since I am not gonna keep the journal I should transcribe my thoughts somewhere, so here they are.

Yes, the math bits were included in the journal when I wrote. Just something fun I did. You can try to figure out if it means anything if you want :)

-

Maple 3.27.21

I don't like journaling .-. mah handwriting sucks, and pen ink takes too long to dry. Apologies If any of this page is smudged as a result ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ And no, Maple does not use anything but pen. When mistakes are made, and trust they will definitely be made, you see a lot of bleh <- that. I also missed like three words in the previous sentence, but it's messy to try to go back and put them in :( this is the consequence of writing when brain is running at negative mph... This may be two paragraphs of nothing, but honestly that's how my day goes, usually. Right now I'm listening to this audiobook to fill up my brain and stop it from thinking. It's quite interesting. I read the book back in middle school, and it's taking me on a trip down memory lane. I was listening to this earlier while playing tetris, too. I'm joining a tetris tournament tomorrow, so I've been grinding this week. Hopefully it goes well! It's funny how I spend so much time playing this game which means so little - but somehow, I find fulfillment in the emptiness that it brings me. Breaking personal records is such a meaningless ordeal, but somehow it's something I strive so hard to do. These days, PBs come once every couple of months. It's not worth it.

-

Maple 3.28.21

Today felt like I did everything and nothing all at the same time. I found out I don't like tetris tournaments. I hung out with some friends. I ate a big dinner. I made some choices I highkey regretted, yet couldn't stop myself from making in the moment. I spent some time sulking over said mistakes by cuddling with roommate. Very thankful for him - I definitely make him so uncomfortable LOL but he puts up with it because he knows touch is my love language. I was debating for awhile today over what I should eat for dinner (or breakfast or lunch or whatever you want to call it :') ) and I realized what I wanted to eat most was my own cooking. Unfortunately, I wasn't feeling like cooking, so I had to settle for something else, but this was kind of a wake up call: when's the last time I cooked for myself? hmmm... It's also at the same time pretty cool because less than a year ago, I was still at a place where I strongly disliked my cooking and only ate it because I had to. Crazy how things can change in just a year - my culinary skills must have improved a lot over last summer... I really need to get my car tires fixed tomorrow. I have time tomorrow. I had better go. If I don't, my car is gonna break.

How does one stop beating themselves up for their mistakes? I don't struggle with forgiveness, but oh how I struggle with forgiving myself...

1 + 2 = 4 = 2

-

Maple 3.30.21

Yesterday, we had to record something for Easter that took forever. It was not fun. I kept messing up. And my perfectionist self kept blabbering about wanting to redo certain things. Everyone was tired - it went so long - some people had exams; I can only imagine how annoying it must have been to hear me complaining about doing things again, and yet - and I hate myself for this - I couldn't help but keep bringing it up. Of course, being unsatisfied with the way I played, I volunteered to patch things up in post production. *sigh*, what a mistake that ended up being. Afterwards, I was tired and wanted to go home. Yet, because someone asked, and I guess I was a bit hungry, I decided to go get food with Junshik and Bryan. My ulterior motive was to talk to Bryan about buying cars, so I guess that worked out. But yikes, I only got 7 hours of sleep last night. - Today sucked. I'm realizing more and more that part of depression is the complete dependence on sleep. When I get not enough sleep, I'm not just fatigued: my life is just hell. I straight up no-showed to a meeting and apologized for it 8 hours after the fact (my excuse was that I feel asleep. Wow, something so embarrassing most people would find an excuse for it has now become my go to excuse. Rip). Went to a meetup because I didn't want to cancel - again - so that was fun (sorry if you're reading this. I lied when I said that I was ok :/). Life group was great I wanted to die but I was leading worship so I couldn't just leave. And oh yeah I just spent the last 4 hours after life group mixing that audio clip because stupid ol' me volunteered to do it asap yesterday. Tomorrow will be fun. I have 7 meetings/meetups from 9am to 8pm. I wonder how many I'll cancel last minute, or straight up skip...? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I hate ______.

-

Maple 3.31.21

9am to 8pm today was rough. It's kinda crazy - when I wake up, I knew it wasn't gonna be a good day...but I really needed it to be at least an okay day. And I think I somehow willed that into existence :O I need to try this again sometime. Didn't cancel or skip a single thing today! (Praise God!!!) After my meetings all ended, I had to tutor for another 3 hours until 11:30, too. That was draining. I also pranked a friend today - told her I was dating right after midnight. Oh I love April Fools. She's the only one I can consistently troll year after year. I also spent a considerable amount of time after midnight trying to figure out how to script Audacity in Python. Useless, sure, but it could save us sound people a couple of minutes every Sunday if I figure it out. This is what my degree is for :') Sleep is going to feel so good tonight.

5 + 4 - 7 = 2 + 1 11 + 1 + 1 - 1 = 6 4 + 2 = 3 5 = 2 + 2 - 3 5 = 4 - 1 - 2

-

Maple 4.2.21

I think my handwriting is getting better with this almost-daily practice =) This whole week has been busy-ness from when I wake up to when I go to bed. Hung out with people yesterday for the first time this week, and it was pretty tiring. I can't say I regret it though; I had a lot of fun and learned a lot about certain people. Recently, I've been noticing that people can tell when I'm tired a lot more obviously - someone on worship team who I only interact with on Sundays literally called me out for it. I'm finding that it just sort of slips onto my face, in such a way that I don't notice and can't even recognize it: I'm shocked every time it happens. Maybe it's because I've lost the will to live, so the lack of will to hide it came alongside as well. I accidentally let it slip that I've been brain empty to worship team today, and now there are even more people worried for me, some of whom I barely know. I'm such a burden :( Brain empty is honestly such a mood though. I have too many problems and not enough will to confront them. Better to just avoid. Yeah yeah yeah this is not healthy I know. I'll save doing things the healthy way for tomorrow :')

1 + 1 = 4 + 3 + 2 + 1 8 = 7 6 - 5 = 10 + 1 1 + 2 = 1 - 1

-

Maple 4.3.21

Today was supposed to be a more chill day, but it really wasn't... Forced myself to get out of bed for a meetup rather than cancel it. I think if I had cancelled it, everything else I had to do today would have followed suit shortly after.... It ended up being a 2-hour meetup, straight into 2.5 hours of tutoring. As much as they might have been pretty ok tbh, I can't say I enjoyed it. I was so dead afterwards. I wanted to cancel my dinner meetup so bad. But I had already gone shopping earlier today (during the first meetup) so that I could cook for him. And I knew if I cancelled it'd be another week before I'd have a chance. The food would have gone bad. So following 2 tilt-inducing matches of tetris which were supposed to be stress relieving (they were not), commenced 2 hours of cooking, followed by a 3.5 hr meetup. It was... haha... Did I enjoy it? Yup. Did I have a hella-thick mask on the whole time? Also yup. I'm so ready for a long hot shower and an early bedtime. Tomorrow is Easter. I'm not feeling very victorious...

1 + 2 = 4 - 1 1 + 1 - 1 + 1 = 1 1 + 2 + 3 - 4 = 4 - 1 - 2 + 1

[intextcitationmlaspeech383]

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[lzaergstudies]

Monday 13 July 2020 

Hey! It’s been over two months since I last posted. Things have been absolutely awful, to be honest (in short, my exams went pretty bad and now I feel really stupid). But today, all at once, a bunch of great things happened--this has been the best day I’ve had the past two months! First, I got my results for the last two exams I’ve taken: I scored an 8.5 for Electric and Magnetic Fields (so I can do physics after all!) and a 5.6 for Classical Mechanics A. A 5.6 is just barely a passing grade, but after a semester like this, I’ll take any passing grade honestly. That means I’ve only failed one course this semester and thereby this year (ugh, “only”): Optics. Next year, we have a different professor fortunately (the same one I have for E&M), but that’s still adding to the workload. Anyways! I also took care of loaaads of emails today (I cleared ALL email tasks for the time being!), texted with a few friends, and got invited to a kind of reunion with some classmates from secondary school!

Okay, okay, this post is already a mess and I haven’t even gotten to the reason I’m writing this. Sooo... I’m doing myhoneststudyblr‘s Summer Studying Challenge! And this time I am gonna finish it! Without further a do, today’s prompt: 

What are your plans for this summer?

Everything I’ve picked up along the way this year and haven’t had the time to do! And jesus there’s so much haha I mean like, game development, algebra, the supermarket problem, reading, Japanese, world building, writing, programming... Do I need to keep going? I think my struggles are clear--but I have to prioritise nevertheless. Therefore, I’ve set a shortlist of goals for 1 September: 

Release a video game out into the wild. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it is something people can play from beginning to end! As I understand it, one of the most important steps in creative disciplines is to actually finish something, no matter what it is! In the beginning it’s easy to pour your soul into a project, but after this honeymoon phase, the real challenge begins. My goal is to overcome this challenge, to prove to myself that I can actually create a finished product! Part of this is also going to be improving my Unity skills; I’m halfway through a course for making RPGs, so that’s one thing I want to finish as well. 

Finish writing a plot. I have a couple of creative writing projects I’m planning to turn into games at some point. I’ve written quite a bit already, but I’ve caught myself spending all that creativity on world building. Of course, that’s important too, but now that I have a solid idea of the world and characters I’m playing with, I want to actually get to the meat of the writing process: the plot. Something to tie all the independent scenes I have floating in my head together into a satisfying whole. 

Write the article about graph theory. All the way back in November, I got in touch with the editor of a maths magazine for secondary school students, and volunteered to write for them. However, since then I’ve done little more than write a single paragraph. I really want to get into science communication as something on the side, so I plan to shift my focus more towards that. 

Move back in with my mother. I’ll definitely overshare if I go into this. I might tell some things here and there though, so maybe it’s better for me to change my url, just to be completely sure. For the record: at the time of writing it’s zaereistudies.  

There’s much more I’ve got planned, like taking a diagnostic test about Japanese language so I might be able to skip a course or two next semester. But that’d just bloat the list with stuff I’m doing anyway. 

I’ll leave the prompt at that. I’m not entirely done with course work yet; I have two more assignments to hand in this week! Tomorrow’s the deadline for Programming Techniques: a super-complicated mess of classes, pointers and obscure C++ I haven’t even heard about from my friend with 6 years of experience with the language. (holy shit??? now that I say it, six years is a hell of a lot!) I’m not even fully participating in the course, I’m just in it for that juicy ~✨K N O W L E D G E✨~ (honestly, it has helped a lot with my code architecture in Unity)  Other than that, I also have an assignment about the Hubble-Lemaître law for Practical Astronomy due next Monday. I hope to get it done as soon as possible though, so I can start the really cool projects! (Don’t get me wrong, this is still a really fun assignment! I’m just more pumped about writing and game dev at the moment)

So that’s it! I’m so sorry if you read this entire mess of a post--I promise to be more concise tomorrow! While you’re still here, I’d like to recommend a movie to you: Koe no Katachi (the shape of voice). I rewatched it for like the third time last night, and it’s my absolute favourite movie. It somehow gave me this vague hope that things would get better. It felt like it kind of wanted to prove to me that I didn’t have to be the next Gauss or Hawking--that it really is all about having fun. It’s still difficult to convince myself about that, even though deep down I know it to be true. But still the thought makes me happy sometimes. 

I hope you have a great evening. See you tomorrow :)

#summer studying challenge #i hope to tell more stories like that last bit in these posts. there's some cool stuff i've experienced despite feeling generally sad :)