Murder Stairs AU
SO! I saw these and Brainy said “haha, imma make shit”.
DP AU where Jack and Maddie built Witches Stairs on the house (for the upper floor and the lab).
In this Au, I’m considering that Danny and Vlad both became halfas in canon by absorbing ectoplasm while on death’s door. Except that the Fenton parents managed to turn on the portal on the first try, so all that excess ectoplasm that Danny would’ve absorbed but didn’t (which the filter couldn’t take care off, since it was such a huge amount) turns into ambient ectoplasm. Basically, Danny was going to show Tucker and Sam the newly opened portal and tripped down the murder stairs and falls at the bottom of the ectoplasm-filled lab. He survives by absorbing the ambient ectoplasm.
I’m also using the argument that some people have about how, in canon, Danny’s powers are stronger than Vlad’s because he was exposed to more ectoplasm (and Vlad is only ‘stronger’ because his powers are 20 years more developed than Danny’s, if Danny had the same time, his powers would be stronger). In this universe, the relative amount of power they have is equal/Danny’s is slightly smaller -- I’m also taking into account the fact that Danny has been exposed to ectoplasm his whole life and his powers are developing while he has direct contact with ectoplasm, as well as a steady source of ectoplasm (while Vlad’s powers developed while he was in the hospital, far away from any significant amounts of ectoplasm).
Also, Danny’s powers take a little longer to develop, and he gets tired from using it very easily. The Wail? Instant sleep upon 20 secs of usage! And he’d end up working a lot more with his most basic abilities (invisibility, intangibility, and flight) ‘cause they’re shown to be abilities that come very naturally to him (he literally slips into invisility/intangibility by accident when nervous on various occasions).
Danny is also very dependent on ectoplasm to stay healthy, which isn’t a problem usually ‘cause, well, portal. But, like, if he uses too much at once and isn’t close to the portal, he’ll get tired and more prone to illness. Road trips? they’re hell. When they go to Wisconsin, Danny’s already working up a fever by the time they get to Vlad’s. Reality Trip? Boy already has pneumonia by the time he gets the gauntlet. Ectoplasm contamination isn’t an issue for him, he has ectoplasm deficiency.
I imagined Danny taking Valerie to the lab after she finds out that he's Phantom and she stops at the top of the stairs. Stares at them. Thinks 'murder stairs'. Looks at Danny. And Says, "Danny, IK u said asking a ghost about their death is a no. But how did you die?" Danny stares at her silently. "You fell down the stairs didn't you?".
(Also, Wes at some point argues that “look at him, he’s so sick he’s practically decaying!”, which Danny kinda resents, but decides to answer with “it’s a health condition!” because... it’s the truth, but also memes.)
Big shoutout to @floralflowerpower who helped me brainstorm this idea!
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Am I a Ghost? Fear Me
Valerie, hoping to improve her skills and learn more about anti-ghost tech, interns at Fenton Works for @kinglazrus
word count: 1069
yo hi laz
“Hi there, Valerie!”
Seconds after knocking on the door, Valerie was greeted by a very energetic Jack Fenton who looked like he was trying very hard to contain his excitement.
“Hi, Mr. Fenton.” She said, smiling up at him.
“Come in, come in.” He stepped out of the way. “Maddie’s upstairs but she should be down shortly. I can’t wait to get started! We’ve never had an intern before!”
Valerie smiled and bit her tongue. She knew why no one wanted to intern here. Everyone was getting more and more interested in learning about ghosts but no one wanted to listen to the Fenton’s ramble on about them everyday. But Valerie needed to learn more about ghosts to help with her ghost hunting and the Fenton Works internship was paid anyways. It was a good option all around.
“I can’t wait to see what you guys all do downstairs. I’ve been down there a handful of times but I don’t think you guys were ever actually working when I was there.”
Jack laughed. “Amazing stuff we do in the lab. We engineer stuff, study ectoplasmic samples, research the behavior of ghosts. All sorts of neat things that we’ll get into soon!”
Valerie nodded and was about to respond when she was interrupted.
“Hi Valerie!” Maddie said from the top of the stairs. “You’re here! I think it’s about time we head down to the lab and get started for today.”
“You betcha, come on Valerie!” Jack ran out of the living room and into the kitchen, already disappearing by the time Maddie and Valerie made it into the kitchen.
“Okay.” Maddie said as they walked down the stairs into the basement. “The first thing we’re going to do today is get your measurements so we can make you a jumpsuit. It’s very important to wear it when in the lab for safety, no matter what our children and their friends think. Do you have any particular colors you’d like your suit to be in?”
Valerie pondered it for a few moments. “What about red and black?”
“Excellent. Now just stand here while I take a few measurements.”
Valerie stood still and moved as Maddie directed while she took note of Valerie’s measurements. Jack was on the other side of the lab listing off the name of each invention that he picked up and telling her what each one did.
“And this one is the ghost gabber! It translates the wails of the ghost language into something we can understand! It also still registers when a ghost is speaking in a human language which is good for confirming if someone is a ghost or not.” Jack turned on the invention.
“Wow, that’s cool. I didn’t know that ghosts had their own language.”
“Wow, that’s cool. I didn’t know that ghosts had their own language. Fear me.”
Valerie frowned at the invention and her gaze flicked back up to Jack’s face when he laughed.
“We finally got this thing to stop picking up on Danny and now it’s registering you too! I guess we never actually fixed it.” Jack said, turning it over in his hands.
Her brows furrowed. “Danny?”
“Ever since our portal started working all of our inventions started picking Danny up and trying to tell us he was a ghost.” Maddie said as she laughed. “Which is ludicrous because we know our son and we know he’s not a ghost.”
“But why does he set off the inventions?”
Maddie paused for a moment. “He was involved in an accident with the ghost portal, the day it started working, which is why lab safety is so important.”
Jack nodded. “Ever since Vlad had his accident in college, we upped our safety protocol as high as we could but that doesn’t really stop stubborn teenagers.”
Valerie’s blood ran cold. “Vlad? As in Vlad Masters?”
“Oh yeah, he was our buddy back in college. It was the three of us against the world!” Jack stared off into space longingly. “But he was hospitalized for a long time after his accident and he never wanted to see us.”
Valerie’s brain was starting to turn as Mr. Fenton kept talking.
She knew half ghosts existed and that both Vlad and Dani were halfas but-
Oh god she was so dumb. She knew about Dani and Phantom’s relationship to one another, but she never stopped to consider how much she looked like Danny when she found her in her human form. Or stopped to think what Dani being both human and ghost meant for Phantom, especially after seeing Vlad transform.
But what did that mean for her?
She showed up on the ghost gabber just like Danny did, but she never had a lab accident where ectoplasm or ghosts were involved. The only thing-
She could feel her suit tingling just under her skin, available to her with the command of a simple thought. She didn’t have to store it anywhere on her anymore, not like how her old one was in her backpack. This one was just there all the time. She never stopped to actually consider the implications of that ghost melding her suit with her beyond having easy access to her equipment that her dad couldn’t take away.
Was she a half ghost too? Was she just severely ecto-contaminated? Was-
“Alright, I’m all done, Valerie!”
She started as Maddie cheerily announced the end of her measurement gathering. The woman had stood back and moved to a cabinet and was looking at different pieces of fabric.
“The earliest I can get this done by will be two days from now, but for today we’ll just continue going over what each of our inventions do and seeing if there are any others that we need to tweak like we did for Danny!” Jack said.
“Okay, yeah. What does that one do?” Valerie pointed at one that she didn’t recognize.
“That’s the Fenton Ghost Weasel! It…”
Jack’s voice slowly faded from Valerie’s hearing as the implication that all of these weapons could hurt her arose in her mind. If she set off the ghost gabber, who knew what could happen with the other ones.
“I caught Phantom with this bad boy once! Had him trapped inside here real good! Until he, uh, escaped! Yeah.”
The more Valerie learned, the more and more it really did seem like a good option all around.
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“I don’t want to be in charge of the clan,” Elliott wailed. “Please be a vampire and lead us, Jace! Please!”
“I used to walk in here and have to fight for my life as the place fell down around me,” Jace mused. “Now it’s all velvet cushions and insistent offers of immortal beauty.”
“It’s just one tiny bite,” Elliott coaxed him. “You’ll like it.”
“Nobody likes getting all their blood sucked out, Elliott,” Alec said severely.
Both the vampires in the room smiled because he was telling them off, then looked upset because of what he was saying.
“You only think that because Simon did it wrong,” Lily argued. “I’ve pointed out to him many times that he messed up everything for all of us.”
“Simon did fine,” Jace muttered.
“I didn’t like it,” said Alec. “I won’t talk about this again. Let’s get going.”
“Ah yes.” Lily brightened. “I’m very curious to see how the hottest Shadowhunter in the world is doing.”
“I’m great,” said Jace.
Lily tapped her foot. “Nobody’s talking about you, Jason. Have you heard the phrase ‘tall, dark, and handsome’?”
“Sounds like an old-fashioned saying,” said Jace. “Sounds like something people used to say before I was born.”
He grinned at Lily, who grinned back at him. Jace didn’t just pull the pigtails of people he had crushes on. He pulled the pigtails of everyone in the world he liked. This was something Simon still had not figured out over the years.
“There are a lot of hot Shadowhunters,” said Elliott. “That’s the point of them, isn’t it?”
“No,” said Alec. “We fight demons.”
“Oh,” said Elliott. “Right.”
“I don’t mean to brag. I’m just saying that if they made a book of hot Shadowhunters, my illustration would be on every page,” Jace said serenely.
“Nope,” said Lily. “It would be filled with pictures of the Carstairs family.”
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