"5 Tips for Dating a Werewolf" by TJ Klune
1. If a werewolf has locked onto your scent, it is best to let them get as much of it as they can. If they are in shifted form, it might mean a wet nose to your face or a tongue in your hair. Fear not! They are, in a way, like a large dog, if a large dog were capable of human wants and whims. If you find yourself in such a position, do not move! Let the werewolf finish its scent-marking. It could take anywhere from five minutes to six days, so get comfortable!
2. Should you find yourself in possession of a dead animal left upon your doorstep, don’t scream and/or vomit! Chances are, it is from the same werewolf who sniffed you, wanting to make sure you are provided for. This is how a lycanthrope expresses interest. Be careful not to offend the wolf, as they might be watching from behind a tree or a bush. If you are averse to blood and gore, pretend someone dropped a cherry pie filled with bones on your porch.
(On the off chance that the dead animal was left by a cult and not a werewolf, please be prepared in case you are marked for a ritual sacrifice.)
3. Going on a date with a werewolf can be a fun event! Given that you might be in public, it would be best not to ask your werewolf suitor to “shift in the middle of an Applebee’s just to see if it scares the server into giving free appetizers.” While many people enjoy mozzarella sticks (especially when given under threat of fangs), using your werewolf in such a way to get fried cheese is considered bad form. Your werewolf has feelings, and no one likes to be used.
(If your werewolf does shift to get you cheese, reward them by telling them you think they are the greatest creature in existence. Positive reinforcement goes a long way!)
4. Uh oh. Your werewolf has driven you home, arches a single, devastating eyebrow, and says, “Are you going to invite me inside?”
Remember, werewolves aren’t vampires, meaning they do not need permission to enter your residence. However, good wolves always wait for permission before entering a dwelling that is not their own.
In this case, given the arched eyebrow, the werewolf is hoping to be invited inside for “adult activities.” This might include rolling on the carpet or having sex in the kitchen and/or up against a wall. If you choose to do this, you might see the werewolf’s eyes flashing. Good news! This means the wolf is having a wonderful time.
5. Your wolf stayed the night! How lucky are you? If you wake up the next morning with the shifter lying on top of you, it is very important that you do not move until they have decided to move on their own. Waking up a sleeping wolf can sometimes be difficult work, but if you keep a squeaky ball next to your bed, now is the time to put it to good use. Squeeze it near the wolf’s ear and ask, “Who’s a good boy? Who wants to play with the ball? Is it you? Is it you?” Your wolf will most likely glower at you and threaten your life, but if you squeeze the ball three times, the wolf will be distracted. Throw it to the floor, and as the wolf chases after it, consider making waffles! Werewolves love waffles.
(God help you if you make pancakes. You have been warned.)
If you have survived these first five steps, you are to be commended! That means you most likely will have a werewolf for the rest of your life. A werewolf is a commitment. Adopt, don’t shop!
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i can finally show the artwork i did for @editions_bookmark, featured in the interior of the french special edition of brothersong by tj klune 🐺💜 i've kept this private since 2022, i'm glad it's out in the world now!
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Okay so I’m looking through Green Creek fan art and why do all of you people think these men are all fuckin twinks????
I refuse to believe homosexual werewolves who like smelling each other are all these hairless lil twinks bffr I know too much about hairy gay men to let yall just lie to yourselves
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This advertisement is for Wolfsong by TJ Klune, a gay werewolf romance novel for adults. The featured artwork is by Mavilez Art and depicts Joe & Ox, two characters from the book.
WHAT WOLFSONG IS ABOUT
When Ox is a kid, his father teaches him a lesson: He’s worthless and no one will ever understand him. Then his father leaves.
When Ox is a teen, the Bennett family moves in next door, and their secret changes Ox’s life forever: The Bennetts transform into wolves at will. Their loyalty and enduring friendship draw Ox to them, but their magic is so far from the quiet life he has known. Then he finds an ally in Joe, the youngest of the Bennetts.
When Ox is a young adult, murder tears a hole in his heart. Violence flares and splits the pack, causing Joe to leave town, and Ox.
Three years later, the boy is back, but a man—charming, handsome, and haunted. Ox can no longer ignore the song that howls between them.
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The Green Creek series really has the best relationships. Just peak angst and yearning. We got:
I loved you, but you left me.
I loved you, but you gave up on us.
I loved you but you can't remember who I am.
Still in the midst of reading Heartsong but god I cannot wait to see what unique Pain Brothersong has in store for me.
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yeah? would a depressed person do THIS?
*reads the entire greek creek tetralogy in a week while working 9-5*
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