#haaahhhhhh

[regretisstoredintheme]

Could I have a yandere rise! turtles with a fem (or GN) s/o who sleeps a lot, like A LOT, but reader would wake up when what the yandere turtles wanted or something serious or etc. Wants some affection? granted. Listening donnie's blabbering about the invention he made? all ears. Movie marathon? lead the way sir. something like that, what would the yan! turtles react?

DO YOU REMEMBAH!! THE 21ST NIGHT OF S— HAAAHHHHHH??????

What’s this??

*snatches paper*

A Request?? 

“Anonymous asked: Could I have a yandere rise! turtles with a fem (or GN) s/o who sleeps a lot, like A LOT, but reader would wake up when what the yandere turtles wanted or something serious or etc. Wants some affection? granted. Listening donnie's blabbering about the invention he made? all ears. Movie marathon? lead the way sir. something like that, what would the yan! turtles react?”

A/N: Ooo… I like where your head’s at, it’ll be my first time writing the yan boyos, so this will be very interesting. Some of this is inspired by @pianocat939 ‘s adaptation, but lets be honnessttt when is it nottttt 

—Yandere!Turtles x reader with hypersomnic tendencies —

Disclaimer: I’m not saying reader has it, just a few symptoms. I don’t condone anything these Yanderes do, this is pure fiction, and should stay that way. 

—

Raph

It worries him, a lot.

He had asked Donnie to do a full checkup the moment you slept over 11 hours in one setting. 

Once he found out there was nothing necessarily wrong, he settles down a little, but he still gets nervous whenever you sleep too much. 

He finds himself shaking you awake more often than not, making sure you still had a pulse. At this point, the only way you can get uninterrupted sleep is by quite literally snuggling him into compliance. 

You wrap a lazy arm around his neck, and he all but short circuits, all his rebuttals melting away as he nuzzled into your grasp. 

He appreciates that this means he can go on missions without worrying that you’re scared without him, cuz’ you’re dozing away in his room, keeping his stuffed animals company ♡ 

His trust isn’t broken too easily, he tends to make your excuses for you, however, if you’re consistently trying to escape, it’s trouble. After the third attempt, he’ll start locking the door when he leaves on patrol, unintentionally guilt tripping you everytime he has to leave. But you wouldn’t do that, so there’s no worry, just because you’re too sweet ☺️ 

Speaking of when he has to leave!! He’ll always notify you— you won’t just wake up cold and alone, he’ll gently shake you awake to let you know he’s heading out. Sure he wanted you to sleep through it so his poor little darling wasn’t terrified, but if he knows he’ll be a while, he wants you to know. 

Sometimes he’ll just leave a note. but either way, if he leaves? you’ll know. 

On occasion, he’ll knit while you cuddle up to him, it just helps melt all his anxieties away, and if he gives you a sweater then you’ll definitely wear it, right? 

It’s possible he tries to get you moving on occasion, suggesting you train with him or even go on a walk with him (not outside, literally just around the lair.) 

If he does watch movies with you, they’re high action so you both don’t fall asleep. He’s more focused on you, honestly, he wants to know so much about you it’s honestly a little unsettling. Because you’re asleep all the time, he feels like he hasn’t gotten to know you as much as he wants to— so he’s practically memorizing your personality. He’s stuck in the middle, like he knows so much about you and yet nothing at all. 

Sicky-Sweet. whenever you start yawning or acting sleepy, he’ll start babying you— asking if you want him to rock you or if you want a snack. He coos over you nonstop, caressing your face with his hands and leaning in to place a sweet kiss on your forehead. 

“Regret!! Why is he so double sided? One moment he’s scared the next he’s sweet??” Exactly. Raph’s never been level headed. he tries to be!! Ohhh he tries to be. but you trip. him. up.

He has no idea how much of a loose canon he is, and it ends up hurting the people around him. He gets fidgety when someone so much as mentions how much you sleep, and he’s trying to suppress the sudden urge to punch their lights out as well as desperately explain why there was nothing wrong with you. 

Leo

He doesn’t mind. Not one bit. 

Out of everyone, he’s probably the one that likes watching you sleep the most other than Mikey. (Creepy ass hoes)

You will never wake up without him either right next to you- playing with your hair and holding you close in his arms, OR CROUCHING OVER YOU WITH THE CREEPIEST F-KING SMILE ON HIS FACE. 

“Did you need something?” You ask groggily, eyes focusing in on him.  “Nope.” He responds, not even bothering to shake his head. “So I can go back to sleep?” You raise a brow,  “Yeah yeah! goaheadbemyguest. :)” he waves his hand to brush off the question, still grinning as his bloodshot eyes bore into you. 

If he ever goes on missions while your asleep, he locks the door from the outside— Yknow, just in case you get any ideas ♡. That way, If you need anything, you can just text him!! 

and he’ll come running~

“What’s that Raph?” He taunts his eldest brother, smirking as he opens a portal, “Sorry I can’t hear you~ (y/n) needs me!!” 

“ Leo do NOT portal away— GHHAH.” If the red-clad turtle had hair, he’d be pulling it out. “we have a foot clan situation here!!” 

Leo doesn’t care in the slightest. he never really did. He considers the missions a responsibility he can easily neglect in favor of you. He doesn’t even want to be on the missions, really. He wants to be with you. Your text telling him how horribly dehydrated you are, or starving, or sluggish.. it brings him pure glee. Please have a need he can cater to.

He adores it, your look of helplessness without him— he loves the feeling of making that all go away, and sure it hurts staying away from you for an entire day, but the sound of you calling him, asking him to come home is like wedding bells music to his ears. 

Out of everyone, he’s the most likely to pull you out of bed. He adores your sleeping face, but how can he help you if you’re sleeping? So he shakes your shoulder, insisting you just had to see this new movie he picked out.

Hyperactive. He’s not always snuggling up to you, sometimes he’s bouncing off the walls, and the only thing that will calm him down is you. You’re his antidepressant, his stimulant, and his pain relief all in one. He leans forward in his chair when you speak, his eyes dilating in a lovesick manner at the sound of your voice. He’s pretty sure he’s addicted to you— he could listen to you talk all day. 

If you sleepily fall over, he is definitely the type to make a “did you just fall for me?” joke. Both canon and Yandere. Don’t tell me I’m wrong. 

He considers your sleepiness as a weight off his shoulder, providing for you was so much easier than he thought!! Almost— too easy..! Heheh…

Too easy…

Hey… you weren’t— avoiding him, were you? No.. you couldn’t be! Not after all he’s done for you, right?

..

Right?

Donnie

He acts like he doesn’t mind it

After all, from all the cameras he kept in your room, he knew of your tendencies even before you had picked up on them. 

Cool Temper. To me, he seems like a very patient Yandere, after all— in his family, he always had to bargain for things that he wanted: uranium, attention, his father’s love— even since childhood! he’s used to it. Honestly, he seems like the type to kidnap you for your anniversary— leaving a love note on your bedside table, lined with a muted, absorbent toxin that would put you to sleep the moment you finished reading. He knew you were susceptible to it, his plan was foolproof, after all, you slept all the time. 

In any case, he makes it his number one priority that you’re comfortable while sleeping.

He modified his desk and chair so you could sleep beside him, and snuggle if you so desire. Its become more of a lengthy couch than a chair, but— anything for you. 

He treats you like a cat in only one retrospect: if you’re clinging to him- suddenly he can’t go on missions. “Sorry, brothers of mine, I can’t move, I got a ‘cat’ on my lap.” 

He tries not to wake you, he feels absolute bliss when you snuggle up to him, addicted to the overwhelming sensation of your touch.

If he ever does feel the need to talk to you, he’s gently brushing his cool hand against your face, analyzing the way your eyes fluttered when you regained consciousness. 

He smiles gently, “There’s something I would like to tell you.” 

You sit up, leaning against his shoulder to gaze at his monitor. 

He had altered it to use an old type of projection, GameCube-style. yknow, the ones that you had to hold up to a lamp because they hardly projected any light? Yeah. 

He made it a little easier to view, of course, he still needs to use it, but he knows that looking at a bright screen when you’re tired is the worst. In fact, you actually indirectly improve his sight because of this. 

If you start to doze off during his speeches, he feels a little offended, but then his delusional mad scientist brain reasons that it’s because his voice is so soothing. 

He can’t help his slight hint of annoyance, though. He was really enjoying talking at to you! 

If he really gets in his head, it’s possible he might start thinking you’re sleeping to avoid him. He would ask you about it, trying to seem nonchalant to mask his desperation. 

You’re gonna have to reassure him, tell him what you love about him, and the like, because if you are avoiding him, you’re in for a world of hurt.

He’s not above making a ‘cure’ to your sleepiness, and he’s not above giving you his cure without your consent. If this is to spite him, he will take away your one refuge. He should be your safe space! Sure he kidnapped you, but you’re not still mad about that, right? It didn’t matter, because you’d be singing his tune once you lost three days of sleep, someone who sleeps all the time can only handle so much loss of energy. 

Mikey

Delusional. 

He reasons that the reason you’re so sleepy is because you’re tired from your trials in a mortal body!! His goddess is completely perfect, and there’s no way they could ever get sick!! and if they did, he would literally curse the gods until he were struck by lightning. 

Makes you whatever meal you want in bed. His lovely darling shouldn’t have to exert themself!! Not when they’ve already done so much by simply breathing in his direction (not like they had a choice—)

If you’re a still sleeper, he draws you. Taking pictures simply isn’t his style, a mere camera lens could never capture your grace, nor how much adrenaline you gave him. Only his dedicated hand can capture every single detail in your relaxed form. 

He’s the one who likes watching you sleep. When he’s not sketching your face, hands, pose, etc— he’s looming over you, unable to keep his hands to himself. How can he? When his goddess is right there and laying so perfectly. You’re practically begging to be in his arms!! and he is nothing but devoted to your happiness, right? 

If you’re a restless sleeper, tossing and turning - he spends a lot of time in the kitchen, whipping up an incredible breakfast for when you inevitably complain about a nightmare you had. He’ll always be there for your nightmares ♡ what kind of devotee would he be otherwise? 

Wakes you up with hymns he wrote himself, and he’s an excellent lyricist. His obsession shows no bounds, and he gives you a sweet kiss to your forehead as your eyes flutter open— letting him stare in those beautiful eyes. 

Maladaptive. When he lays next to you, he feels like he’s in a coffin (in a good way?? Strangely??) it reminds him of the fact that death itself could not tear you two apart. Nothing could hold him back from his dear, and he would fight that so-called god bear handed if they dare lay a finger on his darling. 

and how blissful you’ll both be, buried side by side beneath the grass and dirt, roses encompassing your tomb. How happy he’ll be settled into your side just like this, white and orange flowers laid amongst the beauty of him and his divine. 

You were a work of art, your death would be just as beautiful as your life. He only wished to be by your side, six feet below the earth didn’t matter in the long run. 

He would wake you only for necessities and movies. He loves laying by you, but it’s hard to know everything about his goddess when they were asleep all the time. 

When you’re awake, he’s consistently peppering you with sweet praise, the words sticking to your ears like honey as he holds you close. 

He laughs at every comment you make towards the film, smooshing his cheek to yours and adding on if he sees fit. He thinks everything you say is like music, the melody putting him at complete ease. 

There was no way you weren’t a goddess.

—

A/N: JESUS CHRIST WRITERS BLOCK HAS BEEN KICKING MY ASS— I’m so glad I finally got this finished 😭😭 I hope you enjoy!! I know it gets a little wonky near the ends, but I hope that’s okay. ♡ 

—

#ROTTMNT x reader #tmnt x reader #Leo x reader #donnie x reader #Raph x reader #Mikey x reader #regrettable writing #yandere turtles #yandere leonardo #yandere donatello #yandere raphael #yandere mikey

[the-milk-anon]

Dabi couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun. Watching you squirm and pant and beg was something he would never get tired of. He was kneeling behind you, with you flat on your stomach and your ass hiked up in the air, with his hands hot and firm on your ass. He could hear every sound, every little breath, that you took as he licked a strip straight up from your pretty pink cunt to your taint.

“Awww what a good girl you’re bein’ for me. Haha can’t even keep yourself still can you?~” he mocked you softly and sweetly before he brought his hand down sharply on your ass and he laughed softly as you cried out and jerked against him. He grinned and nipped at your ass, enjoying the way you squirmed and panted like a bitch in heat, before he promptly buried his face against you. Dabi moaned lewdly against you and his pierced tongue rubbed against all the right places as he sucked on you like you were the best treat he’d ever had.

He pulled back only when your legs were quivering and you were shouting as you squirted all over him. “Fuck babydoll ya made such a fuckin mess…. C’mon and climb on my lap huh?” He mocked you again with a smile even as he flipped around until he was on his back and you were straddling his waist. He wasn’t gentle, however, as he took you by the hips and yanked you straight down on his cock.

The moans were simultaneous even as he planted his feet in the bed and grinned wickedly up at you. His hands were burning on you but he said nothing as he slammed his hips up. He watched your head fall back as you bounced and rut his hips like a fucking animal. “Ah fuckkkkkkk doll ya look so good like that- haaahhhhhh fuck-“ he was almost whining as your cunt squeezed around him.

Dabi would deny the way his eyes softened as he watched you lose yourself to the pleasure only he could give you. And when you squirted around him again he would deny the way he moaned your name so softly, so sweetly, as he filled you to the brim until his own spunk was spilling out around his cock and you were collapsing on top of him in an exhausted heap.

*puts on glasses*

ye ok i- mhm. yes.

- 🥛

#fucking hell bean #what a thing to wake up to #dabi x milk #hot milk #dabi smut #beanie 🪻 #dabislittlebeaniebaby #moot moots 💕 #🥦.mha #🥛.mail

[jackalspine]

CHEWEING MY GUCKING HANDS OFF WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME THAT THEY WERE DOING A LIVE MUSICAL CONSERT FUCIJGJFKFN OF THE DEATH NOTE MUSICAL???? HAAAHHHHHH?? SjebebebdkAAAAAAAAASAS IM GOING TO EAT MY SHIRT TEARING MY SNDNDNDMDB DBDND RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

#THE DEATH NOTE MUSICAL HAS BEEN MY MOST LISTENED TO ALBUM FOR LIKE 3 yeARS STRIGHT ACCORDING TO YOUTUBE MUSIc

[corviderii]

i don't want this dramatic life

#i think about doppo a lot. his stress and exhaustion doesn't manifest in some cute easy to wave off way narratively #but as a fear of expressing himself that is only broken by short and intense outbursts of anger and desperation #that then throw him back into the quiet cycle of loneliness and polite silence #haaahhhhhh #hypnosis mic #ヒプノシスマイク #kannonzaka doppo #doppo kannonzaka #25.11.21

[calehenituseappreciation]

Turns out all i needed to get out of family activities was a 

from my mom 

#i mean i wanted to be azula as a kid #ig it worked #haaahhhhhh #i love azula #so much #she deserves better #is this my backstory

[sun-in-eyes]

To Jake or not to Jake

Not expecting them to have Jake Lockley in the series. Jake has always been complicated. Steven was the high life good life guy that handled all the blood money that Marc brought in. He was charming but more or less useless aside from pleasing his lady. Jake was the street guy meant to hang with the under crowd for information and informants. Jake was rough, hot tempered, and often violent. Jake was closest to Marc in personality, but that also meant that they fought a lot. Both hated Steven and viewed him as useless and soft. 

Since the MCU has taken Steven and made him a poor sad boy who is just living his life and nothing special, why have Jake? Marc is highly active and there’s no need to have that third go between. 

That being said, from what I’ve seen, Marc seems to take care of Steven, protecting him from Marc’s bloody life. Which is kinda a sweet twist that I approve of. 

But if Jake does show up, I might loose my mind. I want this show to do well. I want Moon Knight to be done right. A lot of the comics have done him real dirty and I want new fans to go to the comics and be able to pick up the good runs and enjoy them as much as they enjoyed the show. If they pop Jake in there and do him right with the other two, I will foam at the mouth like the super fanboy from ATLA.  Side note: Mr. Knight and his outfit in the comics was knees meltingly good and if it looks just as good on the screen haaahhhhhh....

#Moon Knight #Moon Knight rant #Marc Spector #Jake Lockley #Steven Grant

[paradisewithinpain]

You Pull An All Nighter

Bakugo

first of all

you're stupid if you think this boy is gonna let you stay up too late

but for the sake of the headcanon, you somehow get away with it

you had stayed up all night switching between assignments and scrolling through your phone

you were knee deep into tik tok when your alarm went off

'ah shit'

you got ready fairly quickly and made it down to the cafeteria

you greeted Izuku who to no surprise was coming back from an early morning training with all might

the two of you conversed for a but but the second you heard your blasty boyfriend from down the hall, Deku booked it

the bakusquad greeted you with excitement and joy, with holding you from greeting your boyfriend

but a quick glare towards Kaminari and Mina quickly sent the rest of them towards the tables

you greeted your boyfriend with a smile and sent him off to breakfast, telling him you'd meet him in class since you had spent most of the night snacking as well

when you got to class you sat in your seat and waited for others to arrive since you were the first one there aside from Iida

surprisingly your blasty boyfriend was one of the first ones to arrive

his eyes narrowed at the bags under your eyes and your slightly sluggish demeanor

but he made no comment

he's bad at confronting his worries, alright?

your class ended up doing a rescue simulator and that meant a lot of focus

which was something you were clearly lacking

but thankfully you passed

it didnt go unnoticed by you how bakugou would keep staring at you

he's not subtle at all

once the exercise was over and class was dismissed you felt yourself being dragged away from everyone else

you didnt bother trying to fight it

you were too tired and you recognized the slightly moist i hate that word grip

blasty mcblasty had dragged you out to the side of the school

"the fuck do you think you're doing dumbass?"

"is there something i'm supposed to be doing?"

"yeah, sleeping."

you rolled your eyes and smiled at your boyfriend's convey of concern

"i'm fine 'suki."

"oh yeah? how much sleep did you get last night?"

you didnt really want a lecture so you lied

"a couple of hours."

"bullshit."

"how would you know?"

"your story dumbass."

your eyes widened as you remembered you had posted some stuff on your story throughout the night

you looked up at your boyfriend and sighed

"alright alright, i've been caught."

"tch. thought so."

he grabbed your hand and lead you back to the dorms and to his room

"you're sticking with me for the rest of the day."

and with that the two of you fell into a comfortable silence, both of you working on assignments

but only after a few hours, your eyelids got heavy and you could feel your mind blanking

you tried to keep going but sshortly after you felt you pencil snatched out of your hand

"what the hell?"

"you're tired. sleep."

"but-."

"HAAAHHHHHH???? ARE YOU TRYING TO ARGUE WITH ME????"

you rolled your eyes and shook your head

crawling into his lap you wrapped your arms around his waist

no matter how many times you did this bakugou still got flustered

nustling your head into his shoulder you closed you eyes and started to drift off

"love you 'suki."

you felt his heart speed up slightly

"tch. go to sleep."

smiling you allowed your body and mind to finally rest

but not before you felt a small kiss your temple

"love you too, dumbass."

#boku no hero headcanons #boku no hero imagines #boku no academia #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bakusquad #bakugou headcanons #bakugou x you #mha bakugou #bakugou imagine #bakugo x reader #gender neutral s/o #gender neutral reader #bakugo fluff #headcannons #kriswrites

[spookiiwookii]

i’m graduating today haaahhhhhh

[lebensmoode]

There are two types of what-friends-are-for, at least from my glasses.

First, people who think that their friend's problem is also theirs. So they tend to give suggestion, to help, even to take action for it. It is good for some reasons because it may show that they really care about their friends so they feel like they need to help as best as they can.

Second, people who think that their friends' problem has nothing to do with them....UNLESS that friend asks them for a help. This is not to show that they are ignorant but simply, because they think that friend has been grown-up enough to deal with the problem. They're afraid that their intervention will just make it worse. It also means they trust their friends that they'll go through it well.

And in my case, i breathe for the second one.

You know, my ex, was the first type. Dia pernah cerita masalah temennya yg berkaitan dengan keluarga. And you know what? He was trying to solve it by coming to his friend's house and talking to the family!

Waw.

Kalo misal itu emang temennya yang mau dan minta bantuan, ya it's okay. He did a very honorable job. Yeah. Bravo. Beut........ if his friend didn't ask for it, then it was definitely considered rude. He crossed the line, man, seriously.

But later that friend thanked him for having done so cause it worked. Ya i guess that cingu really asked for help.

And when it was my turn to tell about my type of friendship, which was the second one, HE'S GONE MAD :)

"Itu bukan temen lah namanya. Temen itu harusnya giniginigini. Kalo ngebiarin aja gak bantu apa fungsinya jadi kawan? Ngapain bekawan deket? Apa bedanya dengan kawan biasa? Harusnya tu dikasih tau, abcdefghzzz....."

Haaahhhhhh how could i survive for almost a year with a person like that....

Honestly, it really hurt me. I was weeping but he didn't know since we talked on the phone. HOW CAME HE SAID AND JUDGED ALL THAT SYID WHEN HE KNEW NOTHING ABOUT MY FRIENDS AT ALL???!!! WHAT, WAS HIS FRIENDSHIP THE RIGHTEST ONE SO I HAD TO FOLLOW HIS WAY??? UPIL BADAK LAH!

Sumpa ya kalo diinget inget lagi emang keterlaluan banget sih. Gilak. How relieved i am to having broken up with you pil.

Trus gajadi ngomongin mantan hawe ~~

So ya, the second type is how i can live my lyfe. Hamdalah dari SMA dulu dapetnya temen temen yang emang punya tipe pertemanan yang sama. Yang gak pernah mencampuri urusan masing masing kecuali kitanya yg minta saran atau bantuan. Trus apa gunanya temenan? Hah. Bodat you ex. Ya untuk hepi hepi lah. Udah tau banyak masalah, ya kita sama sama cari distraksi dan pelampiasan. Karaoke, ke timezone, makan bareng, memotoran, poto poto. Ada waktunya kita saling cerita cuma untuk ngurangin beban aja biar lega. Tapi trus yaudah, gak ada campur tangan apapun. Kasih saran sekedarnya, itupun yg sama sekali gak mendikte dan menggurui. Apalagi merasa benar. Semua diakhiri dengan "pilihan ada di tangan elu." Dan sampe sekarang usia pertemanan langgeng. Udah lebih dari 10 tahun dan masih suka vidcall-an.

Dulu memaknai persahabatan itu ialah adanya the sense of belonging. Ternyata, as time goes by, friendship is all about the sense of appreciating. Apapun; menghargai privasinya, karyanya, usahanya, waktunya, bahkan keputusannya.

This is, for me, the real what-friends-are-for.

Trus pas di Medan dipertemukan lagi dengan lingkungan pertemanan seperti itu.

.

.

Have you ever felt thankful for some people's existence? Cause i have. And it strangely makes me want to continue living.

#tulisan #friendship

[robinsnest2111]

(thinks about the new gorillaz album)

JUST FUCK ME UP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#personal #i just have this intense love and adoration for this band ugh and it'll all coming back full force #their music has been with me through some good and lots of really rough times #the band members and the music and just the entire story/universe mean so much to me #can't contain all these feelings tbh #maybe it's time to re-read the biography and see again how it all started ♥ #gorillaz have come so far and have grown so much and i'm just really emotional right now haaahhhhhh

[awkwardxmon]

SLEEPYTIMES

Ngh gotta head off and get ready for bed, got work early in the morning sobs

I HAD FUN THO THANKS GUYS I love my Ver bby he’s such an awkward cookie gosh thank u for dealing with him tonight! Feel free to drop things in my askbox or throw me a starter if you’d like gosh knows I love that <3

#ooc #haaahhhhhh i can't wait for the easter break to start #just a week and a half left #you'd think the students would be looking forward to it most but actually it's us teachers who's dying for a break lololol

[deadhaven]

haaahhhhhh it’s been a while since i’ve had to deal with the “everything i touch makes me want to self immolate” sensory bullshit 

i really did not miss it tbh

#why do i have to occupy a corporeal form #suicide m #not really but i might as well tag it

[emotionallyoffline]

haaahhhhhh god i already feel behind in all of my classes and i havent even finished the first week yet rippppp

#I!!! LOVE!! COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!!111!! #my schedules still screwed up too i need to fix that before i A) screw myself over by taking a terrible class with a terribly-rated prof #or B) screw myself over by accidentally messing up my financial aid #adulting!!! is!!! the best!!!!!!! im not stressed at all!!!!! :) :) : ) :) : ): )) )) ) #if u never see me again know that school ate me alive

[gretehart]

Stream Freebies 4-5-19

WHEW SO MANY THIS TIME AROUND Last time I did this many was some time last year when I had more energy haaahhhhhh--

But regardless, these were fun to do ~

Click Here for Individual Sketches!

#digital art #greteh #gretehart #april 2019 #sketches #freebie stream #freebie friday #freebie sketches #original characters #fan art

[whore4batfam]

why im not a bad brother and why damian owes me a trix yogurt and why bruce also owes me a yogurt for keeping a secret from alfred and why alfred owes me a yogurt bc i had to deal with this mess and JEAN SHRIMPTON  WANNABE CAN GET ME A SPOON

by Timmy D (and Kon stop labeling everything in the fridge as bird food it doesn’t stop Bart he literally ate dog food once because Cassie said it was high in nutrients which is true but also wth why would she say that in front of him when she KNOWS–)

RIGHT OKAY SO don’t ever let my family say i don’t do stuff for them BECAUSE I FRICKIN’ DO i not only gave up my last reeses cup for cass but i also sacrificed MY LIFE 

i repeat, my  L I F E 

for the gremlin

okay so anyways it was my turn to patrol alone because hur dur dur mr. robin redbreast head was off being a bobbsey triplet and mr nightass was off world and cass and steph ANDF WHTEVER THE POINT IS that i was off to be a single man of wonder for the night which is. like. total win. 

#1 right here

so im breaking up fights and skulking around like sherlock holmes / edgar allan bro because i say “CRIME BE NEVERMORE” 

caw caw motherfucker red robin is here

so look the thing is penguin is a shit but a classy shit he wanna a lamborghini sip martinis and look hot in bikinis

SO HE WORK BITCH

(im sorry steph was studying for midterms and she marathoned britney from 1990 to present and she played that one like 8 times because her film 300 paper on Christoper Nolan (pffft) was due and we may ahve taken jello shots not sure) 

back to the aquarium That I Have Not Mentioned Until This Point But I Was There. so Gotham aquarium is on drugs because they’re like “oh how nice a moray eel exhibit how could this go wrong?”

HOW COULD THIS GO WRONG IN THE MOST DANGEROUS CITY IN THE U.S. OF A  

and moray eels are like expensive as fuck to transport and marine fish are becoming more and more protected by the Law so penguin was like “bitch i’ll just import it from my backyard”

and because im #1 i knew this thing that he would do because I’m a detective and i know things

look i’m not going to explain what happened but i did end up in the tank with the moray eels and here’s a science lesson kids:

moray eels live in tropical and subtropical seas and have a wide jaw with sharp teeth. this jaw enables them to grab onto their prey. Romans kept them in seaside pools bc Extra af and bravissimo taste 

(so now we know why penguin wanted them yum yum social status)

moray eels generally do not attack humans unless provoked and 

#1 man of wonder got a date with that beauty only the thing on the menu was ME 

so i ditched bc im not steve irwin tho i wish i was 

i nearly drown, break the lock but also coincidentally my hand, escape the tank, and save the day! WHOO! 

#1 DOES IT AGAIN CAW CAW 

cue approx 28 minutes later im at the manor after texting steph to patrol with a screenshot of britney’s “work bitch” music video bc my hand is shot like its p much shattered which haaahhhhhh not the plan but im cold and hungry and what i reallY REALLY want is a trix yogurt 

sidenote: trix yogurt is the 90s in a cup

but i only have disgusting european goat yogurt at the apartment because 1) I’M AN IDIOT 2) i was trying to eat healthy and be an adult but we all know that’s not going to happen because instead you end up walking down to the freezing garage at midnight with a broken hand staring into the renegade emptiness and struggling to open the lid of the trix yogurt AND IT TASTES SALTY BC OF UR TEARS 

anyways i don’t have a spoon so im doing it the old fashioned way and scooping the yogurt with my tongue when a car (the C4 Chevrolet Corvette which was bruce’s dad’s car so i can deduce they’re coming from somewhere nice but not too nice maybe like a science thing) comes in at steady pace and im like cool cool just licking up my yogurt. and then the car stops. 

and the gremlin JUMPS OUT like the evil goblin child he is 

[sort of like that part in sleeping beauty when prince philip is all tied up like a sex slave but totally not and maleficient’s evil minions are hopping over the bonfire which im sure is like imagery of SOME Milton thing but i digress]

and then B gets out all slow and calm which means he’s pissed and trying to be a Dad about it but idk why he even tries that bc Dames always pushes it too far and everything ends up like scrambled eggs only NOT as delicious and Dick is like “hey im the peacemaker this is my role in the family im so glad im no longer an only child thanks bruce good fucking call” 

so i sequester myself into the corner just trying to eat my yogurt because I CAN because Alfred left for 3 days to visit Julia, which he never gets to do but everyone worked out patrol and civilian identities and he eventually agreed. so im nervously licking my yogurt not even enjoying myself any more bc 1) family drama ruins everything and 2) im not at the hospital when i should be bc i have a shattered hand and B would be pissed at me for stopping for a trix yogurt break

not that he would understand becauuuse TRIX IS FOR KIDS

i am aware that i am an adult but tbh i’m still seventeen and wow it feels like i’ve been seventeen for a while but

perks

so demon brat is screaming about something and Bruce is Ignoring him but his jaw is getting tighter so im assuming at this point that this has something to do with 

Amélie de Parnasse

who Dames thinks is the devil, which is a coincidence because I think he’s the devil but y’know personal taste and all that. Amélie de Parnasse sort of looks like jean shrimpton but with grandpa glasses and Dames is CONVINCED that B has the hots for her or something but he INSISTS that she’s evil and B keeps saying he is not dating Amélie but we’ve all heard that one before but from what i can gather gremlin sabotaged Amélie’s presentation and also took B’s credit card to do so by hiring ninjas 

which, suffice to say, B was not happy about and went “that’s not who we are, don’t do crazy things, yadda yadda yadda WAIT YOU DRUGGED THE REPORTERS no patrol” 

but dames is like “ur not the boss of me boss-man” and bruce is like “um ?? who else is called boss-man around here? its me go to ur room” but Damian WON’T and is like “you’re being STUPID and DUMB and I’M JUST TRYING TO PROTECT YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE DUMB AND STUPID”

Bruce finally is like “go inside i don’t want to discuss this further ho hum i am an adult watch me not get upset with a ten year old child”

well that disappeared real quick bc gremlin point blank REFUSES and says “NO I SHAN’T I SHALL STAY HERE FOREVER BECAUSE YOU CAN’T GO ON PATROL WITHOUT ME BECAUSE YOU ARE A FOOLISH KUMQUAT” or something like that bc the kid’s voice hasn’t cracked yet and tbh all i can ever hear is shrieking idk how Bruce or Dick understand him bc it all sounds like koala screams to me

here’s a reference (listen to it all the way through for the demon growls its spot on)

Well Bruce legit shrugs and says “that works for me” and goes FUCK IT and flat out SCOOPS DAMIAN UP AND GOES MARCHING TOWARDS THE DOOR and im like well good shot little buddy next time you’ll stick it to the man 

but ol’ lucifer baby was not down for the count yet, nope. 

instead, Damian sticks out his arms and catches the convertible car door with his evil possum hands.

no problem for Bruce, he just disregards the kid’s shoulder sockets, no sweat, and tugs

this goes on for several minutes and its just weirdly silent tugging and im STILL licking my trix yogurt bc this cup is WAY deeper than i realized and my tongue span in comparison to the cup volume is getting its tongue-ass kicked and i’m watching this play out silently because it’s waaaay too late to announce myself now and B will just be all blustery “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHINGGOTOTHEHOSPITALNODONTWHERESALFREDWHYARECHILDRENHARDWHYCANTIFUNCTIONINTHEDAYLIGHTBLAH” and im in a delicate state tonight so no thank you please 

so i’m licking the yogurt and Damian is like, perpendicular in the air right now and it starts to look like an figure skating routine of stubbornness (because this family is nothing if not stubborn) when. 

RIIIIIIIIIIIIP.

(okay it didn’t sound like that it was more like WHUMPH but)

the car door was literally ripped off its hinges. 

now, old poppa Thomas Wayne’s convertible opened up real fancy 80s, like this:

so looking at that now it’s not totally implausible that this would happen but. still. 

So Bruce is staring at the decapitated arm and Damian is staring at it and I’m staring at them staring at it because I just witnessed 1) an example of brute-like strength and 2) the most embarrassing family spat since Jason and Dick’s egg and spit battle (gross and what even??) and they STILL don’t know I’m in the corner eating trix yogurt with a broken hand and a bleeding tongue because PLASTIC CORNERS ARE TRAITORS

right so two things are either going to happen here. 1) Bruce is going to like, laugh or something weird and mention some weird article from 1997 that he found outside a doctor’s office in a parenting magazine or like walk away like it was nothing and this will turn into a footnote on an excel doc or 2) Dames is going to receive the most unholy spanking of his life 

i start panicking because they are rising from their stupor and Bruce’s eyes are like electric blue fire and it rapidly starts looking like it’s going to be the latter so I, a moron, step forward because yeah I can seriously dislike him but I’m Edgar Allan Bro and you don’t leave a little brother hanging like that

SO CAW CAW MOTHERFUCKER

“I BROKE MY HAND” I bellow and it echoes in the garage like we’re in Pincocchio whale’s belly 

Bruce twists to look at me and Damian goes BOOKING it upstairs and yeah goodluck gremlin i’ll pray for u when i’m not cursing you for getting us into this mess 

Well, Bruce does his typical  “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHINGGOTOTHEHOSPITALNODONTWHERESALFREDWHYARECHILDRENHARDWHYCANTIFUNCTIONINTHEDAYLIGHTBLAAAAAAH” and it develops exactly how i DIDN’T want it to go, so yeah everything sucked and I was like “are you mad” and Bruce like “why would you think i am mad” with a Mad Face™ and I’m like lol? no reason -.-

anyways idk what happened to gremlin or B but he DID extract a promise from me not to tell Alfred what happened because apparently yanking hard enough at your kid until your dad’s old corvette door snaps off is not considered a good idea and Bruce was like “I can handle it Alfred go visit Julia don’t worry I am an Adult™” which like. no. 

i DID get a stilted thank you from the demon brat which was uncomfortable but kind of nice too because it’s nice to be appreciated for putting your life on the line. or like. your yogurt because B took it away from me when he was fixing my hand and i never got it back. 

and that was the really painful part in all of this. 

because trix yogurt is my life and my life was taken away from me and i sacrificed my LIFE SO I HOPE YOU ALL LIKE THAT.

but yeah. that was tuesday night.

#1 right here

EDIT: turns out  Amélie de Parnasse actually was the devil or at least a witch and NOT Glinda the Good kind and may have been using the moray exhibit as a distraction for her presentation of hypnosis and possession.  

which…yeah…

yikes. 

Thanks for reading! ^.^ 

#my fic #Tim Drake #holy fuck this was so fun to write #batfam #batfamily #tell me you laughed pls

[lookitasari]

kak oki, ku kangen sm pacarku. Tapi saat ini kami kami sedang bertengkar. Yah emg kesalahan aku kak, soalnya aku maunya di dengerin tanpa dengerin dia. aku udh minta maaf kak, tp dia cm read chat aku aja. kmrn aku dua kali nolak ajakan dia jalan kak.

HAAAHHHHHH…. maunya apa sih kamu teh? :))) ati-ati dia pergi beneran, *kompor* 

#ask