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#had the idea of this computer virus who falls in love with every computer or machine it gets itself into
kazaanaxtaijiya · 4 months
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Inuyasha AU Concept
I've had this concept in my head for a while/ever since I finished the game and watched the show sooo I figured I'd throw it out there as an idea or inspiration if anyone is interested — Cyberpunk 2077 AU with the Inuyasha gang 🌃 Hear me out...
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The gang are a bunch of mercenaries that work for various clients through a network of fixers to do any kind of job that calls for their specific set of skills, each of them with their own agenda.
Inuyasha is the Leader, of course.
He grew up as a Nomad and worked towards becoming a professional boxer. When the love of his life, Kikyo, is killed, he's framed for her murder and forced into hiding, desperately trying to hunt down her killer.
He eventually finds love again after meeting a med tech, Kagome, who becomes the first recruit of his newly formed merc crew.
His cyberware includes the Sandevistan for super speed and Gorilla arms, allowing him an advantage in hand-to-hand combat. A sword would be great in order to stay true to his character, BUT imo a machine gun seems like it would be a better weapon of choice for him in this universe.
Kagome is the Med Tech of the group, often assisting with the crew's injuries and cyberware issues after a job is complete.
She meets Inuyasha after finding him brutally beaten and treats his wounds, off the record. She later realizes he is the man accused of killing her cousin, Kikyo, and attempts to call the police, only for him to escape.
The next day, Kagome finds herself in danger, a local gang cornering her into a dark alley. To her surprise, Inuyasha shows up and saves her, unable to forget her after she saved him. She has been loyal to him every since, working with him and her Grandmother (see bonus content) to find out who really killed Kikyo. She eventually falls in love with him.
Her cyberware includes the Monowire for long-range attacks (closest thing I could think of compared to her bow & arrow that's part of the Cyberpunk universe). Maybe a cross-bow?
Miroku is the Netrunner of the group, able to hack into any high-tech computer system due to his intelligence and vast amount of knowledge.
As a Street Kid, he grew up to be a con man, running various schemes to support himself. During a particular con, he ends up crossing paths with Inuyasha. They butt heads at first as they both go after the same prize, with Miroku successfully outwitting him during their first of many encounters. But the more they run into each other, the more they grow to understand each other, and he joins Inuyasha's crew.
Due to a mishap while netrunning prior to the crew, Miroku has become more susceptible to Cyberpsychosis due to a virus that is slowly killing him. Despite his best efforts, he is unable to remove the virus or reverse its effects. He has accepted his fate and just tries to make the best of it. However, he soon finds a reason to keep living when he meets the love of his life, Sango.
His cyberware includes the Sandevistan (gives him the speed to keep up with Inuyasha), and he has the Projectile Launch System installed on his right arm, which launches an explosive projectile from the palm of his hand (a nod to the wind tunnel of course).
Sango is the Soldier of the group, being highly trained in combat and probably the most lethal of the team.
She grew up in the Corpo life as a soldier-turned-bodyguard for some of the most dangerous government officials. However, after her family is threatened by the exact people she was sworn to protect, she leaves the life and becomes a solo mercenary in order to find her only living family left – Kohaku.
She is initially hired to kill Inuyasha and his crew, but after realizing they have a common enemy, she decides to join them– eventually falling for her womanizing comrade, Miroku, whom she becomes determined to find a cure for due to his impending death.
Her cyberware includes Mantis blades (a callback to the hidden blades she has), but she mostly relies on her trusty Katana passed down by her father.
Shippo is more of an honorary(?) member of the crew rather than a truly active member – don't panic!
Upon becoming an orphan, he relies on his wit, tricks, and pickpocket-ing skills to survive Night City. On one of his outings, he attempts to pickpocket Inuyasha, who quickly discovers him and threatens to hurt him.
Luckily, Kagome takes sympathy on the little boy and convinces Inuyasha that they should take him in. Despite their disagreements, him and Inuyasha eventually form a brother-like bond – the rest of the crew becoming family as well.
And although he usually doesn't join in on their hired jobs, his pickpocket skills do tend to come in handy sometimes.
BONUS CONTENT:
Kaede is a Fixer who sets up the various contracts that Inuyasha's crew handles (pretty much Wakako Okada from Cyberpunk). Being Kikyo and Kagome's grandmother while also believing Inuyasha is innocent, she heads the search for Kikyo's killer and helps the crew find answers where she can.
Koga is the Leader of the infamous gang Wolf (Tyger) Claws, known for their ruthless and territorial nature. Despite his hatred towards Inuyasha, Koga has a sweet spot for Kagome and often proves to be a resourceful and well-connected ally... when he wants to be.
Kohaku falls victim to Cyberpsychosis and is being controlled by a corrupt corporation. Sango strives to save her little brother and bring down the corporation responsible.
Hachi is Miroku's longtime friend and former con artist partner who will sometimes assist with jobs as the getaway driver when needed.
Naraku is (you guessed it) the CEO of the corrupt corporation that is controlling Kohaku, the man who is responsible for Miroku's virus that's killing him, and the man who murdered Kikyo in a fit of jealousy and rage when she did not love him back.
Parallel to Episode 132: During a job, Sango's cyberware is hacked into, causing her to start attacking her friends. Luckily, due to his Netrunning skills, Miroku is able to save her just as she's about to kill him.
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benevadeca · 2 years
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OK so strange journey thoughts I'm confused about the womb of grief and empyrean ascent.
Like it's established the womb of grief is where mem aleph imprisons the people who are against her (so Law gods mainly, but also Amon* who IG is a chaos demon who's just not in her specific camp)
(*Amon is interesting bc he's the only boss you don't fight, he's the one Alex fights. And like oof do I have words abt Alex as a character but it's like entirely not her fault she's so badly written, like she basically exists to be "every future you chooses sucks" but with noooo nuance. But anyway love that Amon's wikia states "He procures love and reconciles controversies between friends and foes" I think it is a fun tidbit Alex just attracts guys who she tried to kill who like her despite this fact.)
OK so I get why the player had to fight all the Boss demons each level to get the cosmic fruit fragments bc both video game logic IG and also IG that they needed to be in the hands of someone safely in their law camp/a human who is easy to manipulate but that demons can't get to easy, but if they're the demons who controlled who can pass through each level then like why such a big deal truly.
the concept being that the wise men's power was sealed away and split apart and "put under protection" (words of Lucifer in Chaos redux route), but the people who were guarding them were all the Boss Law prisoners and Demeter was like explicitly on good terms with them even as they were like. killed by the protag
Also if the 3 wise men were theoretically imprisoned how did they get to their weird blank board room in Sector Eridanus, like they escaped prison but were weakened? Or?? But then why is their empyrean descent, basically their Law Domain(TM) at the heart of the womb of grief. either it's been a while since I played and I just didn't pick up on all the lore and I'm missing something or it for realsies doesn't make sense.
The wardens of the womb that you fight are all #girl chaos demons, so very explicitly in Mem Aleph's camp and fits with the mom feminine divine thing. Maria being the last boss i'm still kinda confused on but like at least thematically IG it works or something. Also the 3 wise men merging into Shekhinah is very #gender, same like how Mem's empty form is a fetus with like a classical greek old guy head. Like most things in smt i don't get it but I am looking and it compels me somehow.
And TBH on just a larger level trying to understand the themes of each of the sectors...like sections A-D are representing human vices i guess, while E is sort of the utopian illusory ideal of what earth could be without human pollution (following the wikia), so kind of an alice in wonderland mirror parallel world.
It also being where the Vanishing Point, Oroborus, Yggdrasil, and 3 wise men have their base all serving to embellish this area as like the central plot where we go from extended exposition to Shit Picks Up difficulty jump representing both that you're no longer ignorance of the stakes but also a turning point is coming in where you're going to fall on this cosmic war. Also personal comment but the wormhole they can escape back to earth to being called the Vanishing Point is just something so fun I think. Something something perception perspective parallel lines working to create the illusion of depth in a 2 dimensional space.
Sector F is rly interesting in that it's so. Meta, both on a gamer level but also with the whole Great Will thing, and the idea that (according to the wikia) it "Represents the Schwarzwelt in its original state. It resembles a massive computer, collecting massive amounts of data." So the idea of like. technology mimicing biological processes (following the theme of humans as a virus in that specifically eco-fascist way strange journey has going for it) which in term loop back to technology. I think it's interesting! It being where i think tiamat refers to it as like, a garden or something? where seeds are planted and reborn and it being where the old bosses come back and are shown in what is like closer to their "true" more pure form.
That it's the Schwarzwelt in it's original state but it's sector H that's like true origin of Earth, I think the implication of the Schwarzwelt as not as natural a phenomena as claimed by the supernatural parties but something manufactured as part of this ongoing cosmic war is also again pretty fun I think. Or i could just be completely reaching and pulling this out of my ass, never know!
Sector G I genuinely don't get like...we never see the true face of it it's just kind of uh previous sectors remixed! The illusions thing I guess being metaphor for this where you make your alignment choice and secure what ending your on, so all about perception and there being no true "reality" because all judgements are based on the limited information available in a given moment. Or alternatively with sayyy, the Law and Chaos factions making their bases literally on alternate subdimensions right on top of one another, that very confrontation of self and the other identity formation lacanian boundary transgression kind of thing. But who knows!! Not me!!!!
I had more to say on shekhinah and mem aleph but this post is long lol I'm making a new one
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crimsonblackrose · 2 years
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I originally started Eureka when I was in high school and I don’t think I ever finished it. But I’m not fully certain because I remember the ending, though I remember it earlier in the series and I remember it differently. I mostly remember the earlier seasons but not enough to remember much of the plot other than being unhappy that Stark died. Mostly because he and Carter had a fun rivalry to friendship and it upset me that as soon as he was like growing as a person and becoming kind and caring and getting his second shot he died. But I didn’t remember any of season 4 or 5 which felt like they dragged on. There were so many loose ends and bad choices that made a rewatch frustrating. Beyond like the big one that I feel like every where I looked there were complaints on, so I’m not going to bother with the big issue. Instead I just need to vent about Kim Anderson. Kim Anderson is amazing. She’s a lost love of Henry’s and she’s introduce when her and her s/o come into town and things start getting weird. Specifically they learn her s/o is messing with time and people’s minds so that he can go back and steal the credit for every single time they solve something and be a hero. But possibly the worst part of it is that he’s been doing it to Kim for almost her entire life. Every time she makes a scientific break through he goes back and takes it as his own as if it’d been his idea, finishing whatever project she was working on. Not only that he also went back and it’s insinuated, kept redoing their relationship every time she got upset and tried to leave or when she tried to be with Henry. Like the two of them can’t remember why they broke up or how they broke up or anything and it’s because this creep messed with their minds.
Super super messed up. And they don’t....really do anything trauma recover from it. Instead as the series progresses more time related trauma just keeps getting heaped onto this character. And they spread it out so you kind of forget. So the next time you really see her is at the start of an episode where she’s dealing with the artifact (something that jump into an alternate time line later never to talk about again after they kill Stark off) and then there’s an accident but suddenly we’re in the future and everything is all happy and glow-y. Except things are falling apart. Because it’s Eureka and things are always falling apart. And it turns out she died in that accident and Henry went back in time to save her. Which is super sweet. But essentially the only way to save the universe is to let her die. But like during the episode she’s trying to solve what happened to this dead body that showed up and it’s her. And like this poor woman shouldn’t have to realize that another guy lied to her and messed with her timeline and life, even if this time it was to save her. Just like I don’t know, don’t let her do an autopsy on herself? Come up with an excuse because that’s messed up. So her death becomes like this motivator for this kind of dark Henry time line that they never ever deal with. Henry erases Carters memory and vows to never forget that Carter didn’t let him save Kim and then just suddenly there’s hints that Carter remembers and never really says anything but they just don’t move forward with it. So you’d think okay, that all really sucks but at least Kim’s no longer having the worst time of her life. Nah. They bring her back just to kill her again. I wish I was joking. So when Kim and Henry worked together before they sent a computer program into space to explore further than ever before and to like keep learning and it comes back but it caught a virus so the only way to save itself was to create an organic computer and the only DNA on board was Kim’s. So Kim returns as a intergalactic computer who remembers Henry and Kim and we just watch Henry re-lose Kim again because there’s no way to get all the data off of her without like liquefying her. It’s messed up. It was very messed up. And then they do the thing I hate that they did before which is never speak of her again. This big traumatic romantic person who came back and died twice in Henry’s life and nah he goes to another time comes back and the timeline is altered and he’s married and he never talks about Kim again, even though there are times where they could’ve thrown in a throwaway line about how he couldn’t handle losing his wife the way he lost Kim but whatever. The thing that bothers me the most about it is they went the alternate reality route which means they could’ve brought her back and they could’ve brought Stark back. Like maybe the actors didn’t want to come back but it’d have been nice to know what happened, or to occasionally remember them. They did bring Stark back for one wonderful episode where the only person who can see him is Carter and he just sort of spends the whole episode heckles him. And I realized what the show had lost in all of it’s dramatic time jumping and alternative timelines and going to space and brain take overs was the comedy. Because it’s like a comedy drama but then for a while it was just a drama with suspense. I mean there’s still parts I enjoyed, like when Carter got to do more comedy bits, or the running gag of his Jeep getting destroyed in almost every episode. Or heck the Cobra Kai creed that pops up in the galaxy camp episode where a bunch of kids shout “Thrust first, thrust hard, no mercy sir” which is embarrassingly hilarious. And really that’s what, if I could gif things and knew how to, I’d gif a collection of Carter’s cars getting destroyed and the cobra kai creed, and then I’d maybe make myself sad by collecting all of Tamlyn Tomita’s scenes as Kim Anderson because while the character arguably was the most traumatized and hurt out of all of the Eureka characters Tomita’s acting was flawless. And I’m just going to be over here mad that I had to watch her die countless times because they kept going revisiting her death for a few episodes over and over again trying to figure out what had gone wrong only to later never talk about it again. I can however screenshot things. So enjoy the weirdness of this script writing choice for a karate kid parody (The galaxy camp is competing over the best rocket thrusters) and the realization that someone on the team was a fan of the karate kid and didn’t make any references when they had Tamlyn Tomita on the show. (Though maybe I missed it but it feels like a massive missed opportunity)
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the-moon-pal · 3 years
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IM GONNA RAMBLE about ocs in this post because i enjoy doing that
#Damien talks#ok welcome to the tags. assume im talking to you like in a pillow fort and im telling u about ocs because for some reason ur interested#ok so. you know Jason? my ghost oc? i made it tragic. like. Jason's death is a tragic thing. i was like working on the fact that Scott#was being a bitch™ and just killed one of his closer human friends. but instead i decided to make him have feelings for once and that was#regret for killing a friend of his. i promise its more dramatic but im just downplaying this because uhh im just sort of rambling about it#DHDHJDNFFMFM#uhm. OH YEAH ALSO OC IDEA i had this idea while i was out like. weeeks ago#had the idea of this computer virus who falls in love with every computer or machine it gets itself into#but the poor virus doesn't know they're the ones destroying the machine. so they're sad but they keep looking for more computers#they're very in love 🥰 but y'know.. not like /permanent/ they're just a program.. a very obsessed program.. HSHDBDBDN#im replacing the lovecore oc for this one because!! i like the idea. also because the lovecore oc is hard to work on JDJDNDNDND#what else uhhhh pfffff#Rickey is... vibing uwu. i gave him funny little details in his backstory#also he can make himself into mist. for the dramatic effect because he's such a show off. i love his ass#also he's aro gay. i never stated that but yeah#i think that's all for me i think#i could ramble more but naaah im pretty sure u want to stop reading#alrighty ❤️ good day to u
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buckyownsmylife · 3 years
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You and I - Henry Cavill smut
The one where Henry comes over to fix your computer
Warnings: reader is a henry fan, pandemic theme, lockdown and quarentine-ing, little bit of second-hand embarrassment?, heatwave, henry is feeling deprived in this one, oral sex (f), masturbation (f), dirty talk, brief hairpulling, the name of God in vain, Henry’s monster dick,  laughing and teasing while fucking, hand over throat but no actual choking, orgasm control, p in v, unprotected sex
Word count: over 3k, ‘cause I got no chill
A/N: this was inspired by a tik tok someone requested me to write a fic about it. Obviously I took it in a different direction because can I ever follow guidelines? No. I do love this fic, though. Thank you to @lokiscollar​ for giving this a read for me!
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Y/N’s P.O.V
Driving to a secluded location to spend lockdown in felt like a wonderful idea. There was a working wi-fi connection, so I could work remotely from the seashore cabin without any problem whatsoever, and the view was obviously to die for.
I did not expect someone else to have the same idea as me. The cabin next door had been occupied on the same day that I arrived, and much to my surprise, I recognized my new neighbor as someone I never expected I’d come to meet in my entire life: an actor. An actor I actually had a crush on.
Thankfully, the situation didn’t exactly call for mingling. I ran off to hide inside my cottage as soon as I realized who he was, occupying myself with fixing everything for the next day instead of daydreaming about the man next-door.
There would be time for that later, once I got in bed. But weirdly enough, that was the only time I really thought about him during those first weeks of quarantine. Every once in a while I’d get the random wave of curiosity about what he was doing - what did Henry Cavill get up to while spending lockdown by himself? But that was pretty much it.
I woke up every day, had breakfast, worked and then went to bed. Sometimes I’d sit by the balcony and watch the birds fly, taking in the scenery and breathing in the salty water. Even as a kid, I’d always loved the sea. It was comforting, so it made sense for me to turn to it in such a stressful time.
Sometimes I’d hear a bark or two, reminding me of the man who was staying in the other cabin, and it made me smile. I always did like his dog, whenever I saw pictures of him.
I hoped they were alright and that the absence of any human contact wasn’t getting to them, even though it was getting to me. I could feel my own social abilities - which weren’t exactly stellar before - slowly becoming decrepit, and I was scared to think of what my first human interaction would be like once lockdown was over.
I just hadn’t anticipated it would be come so soon.
The morning began as it usually would. I took my shower, I had my breakfast, and I sat in front of the computer with my coffee in hands, ready to start working for the day.
Only the computer wasn’t ready for it, too.
“What?” I talked to myself - something that had become more usual the longer lockdown went on. “Oh, no, no, no…” The situation was looking drearier the longer I stared at my lifeless screen.
Looking up at the clock, I considered my options. Even supposing I could get someone to come to this middle of nowhere to fix it, there was no way I’d be able to get it done before work started.
Sighing, I pushed away from my designated desk to call my boss. Thankfully, he understood and I was left to repair the damn thing and come up with a solution for the next day.
My heart ached at the prospect of having to abandon my refuge because of an electronic malfunction. And that is, if there even was anyone willing to fix the damn thing, considering the pandemic and the rules of social distancing. That’s when suddenly, an idea popped up.
I remembered all the fuss a few months back over a video of Henry assembling a computer all by himself. There was no way someone with that much hardware prowess couldn’t at least know enough to fix this simple laptop.
With that thought in mind, I gathered all of my courage to leave my little shack and make my way to the neighboring cabin. I took a deep breath before knocking on the door, and after a few seconds of silence - he was probably surprised and certainly not expecting anyone - a voice sounded from within.
“Who is it?” Now, I had thought this through. If this man came as far as I had come to this damn forgotten town, it was because 1) he wanted peace and quiet and 2) he was as terrified of the virus as I was. So I knew what I needed to say - what I would like to hear if the roles were reversed.
“It’s your neighbor. My name’s Y/N. I’m so sorry to disturb, but my computer broke and I need it to work and you’re the only person I’m 100% sure has been socially distancing for long enough not to put my life in risk.” After all, I would have seen if someone had come to visit him. I didn’t need to say this because both of us knew it. “Would you pretty pretty please come and check it out?”
Silence followed my question and I sighed, rubbing my sweaty forehead as I knew this was a long-shot. “I understand if you’re unable or uncomfortable doing so, I just figured I’d ask. Thanks anyway!”
I had already turned my back to his front door when I heard it swinging open, the pitter patter of paws following close behind. My eyes took in the man in front of me for only a second before looking down at the dog at his feet, head tilted in interest as he analyzed me.
Immediately, my eyes lit up. “Kal!” I exclaimed, kneeling down to let the animal sniff me so I could pet it. My heart stopped working for a second when I realized what I’d done, though.
“Sorry!” I looked up at him from my kneeling position, trying to ignore how awkward it was, considering what I was close to. “I-I do know who you are, I’m not gonna lie about that.”
I straightened up as he kept looking at me in a way I couldn’t quite define. Neither could I determine how it made me feel, just that it made me avert my gaze so I’d stare at my feet.
“So… Are you gonna help me?” He chuckled at my question, closing the door behind him and taking a step in my direction, making me fumble as I instinctively stepped back.
“Sure.” It was the first thing he spoke to me, but we walked back to my own place in silence. He had his hands in his pockets as Kal followed us closely, his tongue hanging outside his mouth as he happily explored the outside for this little while. “Come on in.”
The way the cottage was set up left little space for him to wonder where he should be helping me. The desk in which I had prepared my set-up stood right by the wall to our left, and there he went without me having to point it out.
I watched a drop of sweat roll down the nape of his neck and fall under his tank top, distracting me as I licked my lips at the sight of it. Then his head turned to look at me and I realized that he was waiting for an answer to a question I hadn’t heard.
“Yeah, huh?” He chuckled again, making my face feel warm - an not (only) because of the overwhelming heat.
“Is it okay if I disconnect the wi-fi?” I wave my hand dismissively, shrugging.
“As long as you’re able to fix this, you can do whatever the hell you want.” I got the impression that I amused him, but he didn’t say anything else as he got to work on my (seemingly) dead computer.
Minutes went by of complete silence, safe from the sounds of typing and metal as Henry worked on the machine and I tried not to bite my nails. Finally, he pulled away from the screen and put his hands on his hips as if assuming some sort of decided stance - but if it was a good or bad thing, I couldn’t tell.
“Tell me, doctor.” I asked, pushing myself away from the sofa to approach him. The smell of a man’s sweat really had no right to be this arousing. “Is it life or death?” Henry turned to stare at me with a quirked eyebrow, and in the seconds it took for him to answer, I was once again distracted by just how hot he was.
“Sorry, what?” I asked when he became silent and I realized he’d asked me something I hadn’t heard once more. His smile said he was annoyed and entertained at the same time. “Sorry, you’re hot, it’s hot, and I can’t think straight,” I sighed, brushing the hair away from my eyes as I pressed my palms against them, trying to pull myself together.
“I swear to God, I’m not crazy.” I tried to look him directly as I said that, but was surprised at what I saw when our gazes met. There was a peculiar sense of yearning that he exuded, something I couldn’t quite place but that took my breath away all the same, especially when he took my silence as an invitation to invade my personal space.
“If you want me so badly, all you have to do is ask.” Silence fell heavily and I was out of breath just from his words - not a good sign. My throat felt dry, too dry, so I swiped my tongue over my bottom lip as I struggled to say something.
“W-why, though?” He tilted his head to the side, eyes inscrutable while he judged my question, trying to understand where it came from just like I was trying to understand his interest in me, when he suddenly smiled.
“I figured it’s a nice way for you to pay me back.” It took me a second to understand what he was referring to, and then my eyes darted from the computer to him, my mouth falling open in offense until he started chuckling. “I’m joking!” But even so, the question remained…
“Sweetheart…” He spoke, voice low and velvety as two strong hands suddenly enveloped my hips. “You’re seriously underestimating how hot you are.” I didn’t know what to say, so I had to make sure I’d hear him right.
“M-me?” A predatory smirk took over his face, slowly. I gulped under its intensity, feeling much like prey as he started to back me against the couch. I fell on top of it with a gasp, and another one escaped me when he used my ankles to pull me closer.
“I wanna eat you out.” It was all I got as an answer, but I can’t say that I minded it. As he dropped to his knees before me, pulling down my underwear before spreading my legs for his eyes to take in, it felt like I got a response from the gesture in itself.
“Do you know how long it’s been since I ate pussy?” The unexpected question made me choke on my own saliva, as he chuckled darkly in amusement at my bashfulness. I could only breathe through my mouth when he leaned down to run his tongue on the edge of my lips, slowly acquainting himself with my taste, making me moan softly.
“I-I definitely and decidedly don’t.” He seemed to like this answer, understand that it delimited exactly the type of fan that I was: the kind that knew what he was and what he liked - his dog, his computer - but not someone who was obsessed with his entire dating history, eager to know his every secret.
The longer Henry ate me out, the clearer it became just how long it’d been since he’d done this. It was obviously something he liked - the way he buried his face against my cunt and engulfed it entirely with his open mouth showed so. And the fact that he licked me and sucked me like he was a starved man? This was a man denied of a pleasure he genuinely enjoyed, that much I was certain of.
“Do you like this?” He asked once he inserted one of his thick fingers inside of me, already stretching me beyond what I could do with my own hand.
“How could I not?” I managed to moan a response, making him chuckle.
“Show me how to find it,” he instructed, eyes sparkling with determination. “I want to find your sweet spot.” I’d never had someone I was with so interested in giving me pleasure before.
Hypnotized, my fingers circled his wrist as best as I could, slowly moving him to run his digits over the top of my channel. He knew when he found it because I cried out for him, closing my eyes momentarily.
“Cum for me,” he ordered, and how could I deny him that, especially when he was looking at me with those darkened eyes? He milked my orgasm until my pussy had stopped clenching around him, but the second that it was done, he growled, getting up to his knees. “Gonna fuck you now.”
He pulled me by my hair, making me moan out loud as he slowly inserted his monster cock inside of me. “Oh, God!” His groan had me panting, cunt clenching around his thickness. I couldn’t understand how I was able to take it, but I was glad that was the case. “So… tight…”
Through his grip on my hair, he pulled me to deposit quick kisses down my jaw. “You take me so well, darling.” It was a compliment I was proud to receive, even though I wasn’t too sure how I managed to earn it in the first place.
“I honestly don’t know how,” I admitted, gasping when he slowly dragged his cock out to slam it in me, but I instinctively pulled my hips away, earning an amused chuckle from him.
“Come back here,” he ordered, already pulling me back to spear me with his painfully hard length. I’d have to be inhuman not to cry out at the feeling of his bulbous head bumping against my cervix. “Are you scared?” He joked as I bit on my bottom lip not to give in and laugh. “You think I’m too big?”
“You’re more than enough, I’ll tell you that.” Now, that had his own laugh escaping his chest, making my body tremble underneath his, inadvertently getting some friction between the both of us. It earned me a moaned out, “Yes…” that got his attention back to where I hoped it would be, and as his eyes settled on me, I briefly wondered if I was prepared for what was to come.
“But now that you got all of me inside of you, do you really want to go?” The whispered question made me shiver. I never expected him to be the type to talk dirty, but then again, I never expected I’d be fucked by him, either.
“No.” It was all the permission he needed.
“Then let me fuck you hard.” And hard he did fuck me. He was hard inside of me, it probably would have been painful for him if he wasn’t so desperately trying to alleviate it by frantically fucking me against the couch.
It was the most deliciously torturous experience I’d ever gone through. I had to bite my lip while I held onto his shoulders for dear life, trying to stop my moans from escaping because I was sure that for once, I’d become a screamer.
Unfortunately, it seemed like Henry didn’t appreciate my efforts to keep his ears from deafening. “What’s wrong?” He questioned, fingers tightening on my hips. “I thought you wanted this.”
Confused, all I could think to say was, “I-I do.”
“Then let me hear you,” he insisted. “You know you can scream all you want. We’re all alone up here on the coast.” Well, he wasn’t wrong. And with that reassurance, I allowed my head to fall back and my mouth to fall open, my moans flowing freely from my body as Henry kept fucking me.
“This is so much better than touching myself in search of a release,” he mumbled at some point, like he was talking to himself. “I was so damn lonely and you have such a tight little pussy.”
Being fucked by him felt like a religious experience. Henry somehow knew the map to my pleasure, easily bringing me to the brink of bliss before I had even managed to wrap my head around this turn of events.
My moans grew louder as I climbed higher and higher, but before I could fully tip over his hand curled around my throat, not constricting any air, just calling my attention.
“Ask for permission, baby.” Just the order had me clenching around him, prompting him to release a moan of his own. All the while, I was groaning in frustration, trying to control myself or say what he wanted me to say, but all that came out of me was, “Goddamn! You can’t say stuff like that.” Henry’s laughter flowed freely once more, making my heart skip a beat. “Why not?”
“Because you’re a fucking movie star and I am not up to fall in love with you.” That had his eyebrows raising in surprise, the smile disappearing from his face before it came back as a teasing smirk.
“Oh, so this is a one-time thing.” The taunting manner in which he said it surprised me in turn, so I hesitated before nodding. I mean, of course it was, right? He didn’t even know me. This was strictly sexual and physical, I would not be fooled by my own hormones. “My cock is not enough for you to want to get to know me some is that it?” … Was he testing me?
“Yes.” His smirk only grew at the word. “This is a one-time thing.”
“We’ll see about that.” His fingers ran down my body to graze over my clit. I sucked in a breath, trying to keep it in, knowing I was going to lose. Eventually, as my thighs began to tremble, I gave in altogether.
“Please, let me cum, please.” His eyes softened at my broken and desperate plea, hand gripping my cheeks as he finally nodded.
“Keep staring at me as you cum,” he commanded, still just as bossy. “Show me how pretty you look when you cream all over my dick.” That was all I needed to succumb to the pleasure he was subjecting me to.
I felt his cock, still hard as it pumped rope after rope of cum inside of me, and by the time I was able to open my eyes again, he was panting over me, sweat dripping from his forehead onto my face.
I didn’t have the time to think about what I should do - push him away, try to pretend this didn’t happen - because the second I began to adjust on the couch, he pulled me to rest against his chest.
“Let’s stay here for a little while,” he quietly asked me. “Then we’ll figure out if there’s enough room for me to take you in your bed.”
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parkersbliss · 3 years
Text
Daisies | Newt
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pairing: newt x female reader
wc; 1.6K
warnings: swearing, angst
synopsis: newt knows it’s his fault wicked has you, which is why he has to be the one to save you, to tell you how sorry he is... for everything
a/n: no I’m not sorry for this :D
Masterlist | Taglist | Prompt List
Newt knew you were strong.
If he were being honest, you were probably strongest out of all of them.
But that didn’t mean he wasn’t scared for you.
He was so scared, he had no idea what they were doing to you but he knew what they were capable of.
That’s what he was scared of.
What happens if by the time he gets there it’s too late?
Then it’s his fault. He’d have to live every day of his life (not that there was much left) knowing that he wasn’t strong enough to save you.
He didn’t want to live like that, no one did. But he had to prepare himself for the worse, he had to be strong for you, but he was already weak. He could feel the virus itching at him, slowly making its way through his body.
But Newt was determined to see you again, he only needed one more time.
One last time to hold you in his arms, one last time to tell you how much he loved you.
That’s all he needed, that was the only thing that was keeping him going as he leaned against the wall and listened to Thomas try and shoot off the guards. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t think this might be the end.
“Shit,” Thomas said, shaking his gun, “I’m almost out.”
Newt purses his lips, trying to think of a way out or anything that would buy them some time.
Thomas pokes his head around the corner, continuing to fire his last few rounds at the guards. Newt can hear the gun begin to jam, signaling the loss of ammo.
Newt lunges forward and grabs something from the guard's pocket. It looks like a grenade of some sort, but there’s no time to really figure it out before he grabs Thomas by the shoulder, “Get back!” He orders, tossing the device and praying it does some kind of damage.
For a brief second, nothing happens and Newt begins to panic, but then it explodes, successfully electrocuting all the guards who fall to the ground in a heap.
Thomas turns toward Newt, patting him, “Nice.”
He nods his head, rounding the corner, they pause waiting for someone to pop out and start firing at any second, but it never comes.
“You go that way, I’ll go this way,” Thomas said, nodding over to the opposite end of the hallway.
Newt nods his head, quietly heading down the hallway. He doesn’t have a weapon anymore so he’s more cautious, heightening his hearing for footsteps.
Or maybe even you.
Or Thomas in case he does something stupid, which was likely knowing him.
But it’s quiet, he can’t hear anything besides his own footprints and his frantic breathing. Newt rounds another corner and now he can hear voices.
They’re distant and he can’t make out anything they’re saying, but knowing WICKED it wasn’t anything good.
Then there’s a loud crash and screaming.
“Let go of me!”
“It’s been six months, just give in.”
“I said let go of me!”
Newt freezes on the spot, he knows that voice.
It’s you.
He’s between being impressed and concerned, he knows you wouldn’t have ever given up fighting but in a place like this, he can only imagine what happens when you fight back. Newt peeks his head around the corner, trying to see a way in, a way to save you.
But there are too many people for just him and no weapons.
He has to go and get Thomas, which means leaving you alone.
That’s the last thing Newt wants to do, but he has to remind himself that you’ve been alone for the past six months, five more minutes won’t kill you.
Hopefully.
He doesn’t take any longer thinking about it and takes off toward the other end of the corridor, his feet pound against the metal of the hallway and he’s grateful there isn’t anyone else around, otherwise, he’d surely be shot down.
“Thomas?” He shouts, hearing his voice echo around. “Thomas?”
The said boy comes running around the corner, hair disheveled as he pants, “are you trying to get us killed?” He hissed.
Newt looks him up and down, ignoring his question, “What happened to you?”
Thomas rolls his eyes, tossing Newt a gun, “I found us some weapons, that’s what happened. What about you?”
“I found (Y/N),” He said, tucking the gun into his belt.
Thomas’s eyes widen, “and did you get her?”
Newt rolls his eyes, “Don’t you think she’d be here if that was the case?”
Thomas mumbles something under his breath but Newt isn’t really listening to him, “I didn’t have anything to take the guards down with so I came to get you.”
Thomas nods, loading his gun, “well let’s go get her back.”
The determination in Thomas’s voice makes Newt feel a bit better, despite the feeling of his lungs closing in on him.
It was getting harder to breathe, and incredibly hot, but Thomas didn’t seem to be sweating.
Newt leads Thomas back down the hallway, taking a left to where he last saw you, but no one’s there.
He’s about to turn away when he hears it, screaming.
Both boys flinch at the sound, Newt so much as going to cover his ears. It breaks him from the inside out because he knows it's you and it’s his fault for not saving you that day.
He blames himself every day for what happened, he knows he deserves whatever this virus does to him.
He just needed to tell you how sorry he was, and then, he could finally rest in peace.
Thomas turns his head around the corner, counting the people in the room and trying to strategize.
He comes up empty-handed, pursuing his lips together as he weighs the risk of just barging in there and shooting everyone. He looks down the hallway to make sure no one else is coming and runs forward, crouching under the glass pane blocking him from you. Thomas gestures for Newt to do the same and the blonde follows, scurrying under the opposite window.
“They’re not looking at us so on the count of three we start firing.”
Newt nods, holding his gun to his chest as Thomas starts counting. He tries to block out your screams, hoping he can forget them and that he doesn't die with that ringing in his ears.
“Three!”
Newt spins around, pointing his gun at someone through the glass and firing. The glass shatters, pieces cutting at his skin but most of it bouncing off his suit as he continues aiming at the people in the room.
They seem to all be doctors as none of them are carrying any weapons of sorts and are all dead in a few minutes.
The two boys wait for thirty-seconds before jumping into action and sweeping off the broken glass and entering the room.
Thomas is quick to start messing with buttons on the computer as Newt grabs your shoulders.
“(Y/N)?”
“I really hope none of these are instant kill buttons,” Thomas mumbled as he pushes the big red one.
The machine goes dark and he begins slowly pulling off all the wires attached to you as Newt slowly wakes you up.
Thomas makes no comment to go faster, though he should.
“Newt?” You asked softly, adjusting to your surroundings.
“Oh thank god,” He exhales.
Your eyes are dark as they scan over the room, Newt gently takes you in his arms but you’re quick to push him away, scrambling out of his grasp.
This was WICKED, it had to be.
It was like all the others, where Newt would save you, only to turn into a crank and drag you away.
“Stay back!” You shout, putting as much distance between you and him as possible.
“(Y/N)?” Thomas said, grabbing your attention.
Was he real?
Thomas was never in any of your nightmares, but that didn’t mean WICKED didn’t add him for some extra effect.
“It’s us,” Newt said, “You remember us, right?”
“You’re lying,” You scoff, “I know it’s you WICKED.”
Newt’s heart sinks in his chest in realization, this is what they’d done to you?
“It’s us,” Thomas pleads, trying to think of some way to convince you. If WICKED had gotten in your head, how do they bring you back?
You wanted to believe them, you really did, but you’d grown so used to the games and tricks and it was never worth the pain.
“Prove it,” you said, looking to both of them.
Newt’s first to speak up, “Daisies!” He blurted, “you always said if we ever made it out of the maze you want to start a flower garden at that the first flower would be a daisy.”
He’s choking on his words as he sees denial still flash in your eyes, “You also said you wanted to name our future daughter Daisy.”
It’s hard to say those words knowing it would never happen, Newt knows he doesn’t have enough time left. He knows he’ll never give you that, and for that, he’s sorry. He’s more sorry than you’ll ever know.
“Daises,” You whisper under your breath. Your shoulders drop when you realize that it isn’t some trick anymore.
“You’re real,” You said, running forward and hugging Newt.
Relief washes over him as he grabs the back of your head and pulls you as close as possible. “I’m so sorry,” he said, the words falling from his lips faster than he can process them, “I’m so sorry for letting them take you that day, for everything, I should’ve been stronger.”
You don’t say anything just hug him tighter.
“I love you,” He said, pulling back to gently cup your face. "I love you so much."
You’re not sure why, but Newt looks paler, his eyes duller… almost sickly.
“I love you too,” You said, not questioning the sincerity and the pain in his voice.
Newt blinks, tears running down his pale cheeks, “I’m so so sorry.”
If only you knew the other half of what he was apologizing for.
— END —
🏷 Newt Taglist: @lozzypoz321 @emeliii1 @tylers-ankles-beebos-forehead @remusflirts @sonnydoesrandomshit
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prettywordsyouleft · 3 years
Text
To Be Continued - Part 1
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Summary: As an author, you had created Brian Kang for your current trilogy series to represent the ultimate man that everyone would love, along with Charli Evers - your female protagonist. What you hadn’t expected was for him to find a way out of the story and begin shaping up your world instead
Pairing: Brian Kang x female writer (ft. Park Sungjin)
Genre: writer au / romance / fantasy
Warnings: fictional characters coming to life / a bit of angst here and there / Sungjin as a cop (or does that only affect me?) >_>
A/N: this story idea was created from receiving two prompts for Brian in the YouxIdol drabble game I was completing this year. In this part, you can find prompt #186, “You don’t have to answer right away. I’d wait an eternity for you.”
Word count: 2252
Preview | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Epilogue
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Brian cupped her cheek tenderly with one hand, smoothing out any worried lines across her forehead with the other. He smiled encouragingly, tears threatening to spill from his eyes with his heightened emotions. “You don’t have to answer right away.”
“I don’t?” Charli breathed back, knowing that her response to his question was already formed. Yet it wasn’t the right time for any love confessions right now. Despite this, her answer rushed to the back of her throat, where she tried to swallow it back down repeatedly.
Brian already knew and nodded softly to let her know of this. “I’d wait an eternity for you.”
“Isn’t that a bit too cringe-worthy?” you wondered, pausing to read the words upon the screen with a frown. It wasn’t out of character for Brian Kang and Charli Evers. And it certainly wasn’t the first cheesy line you’d thrown into Captivated either. Still, you mulled over the scene a little longer, deciding whether or not it should be removed.
“What would Charli do in response?” you asked out loud to no one in particular, a flurry of action from your fingers taking place immediately. You followed the scene until completion before taking a break, switching out of the word document and over to your Discord server.
Smiling as you scrolled through the new comments about the upcoming sequel you were in the later stages of writing for Brian and Charli, you let out a rattle of a cough from your chest, groaning at your illness dampening your mood.
“I’m trying to finish this final chapter tonight,” you spoke out into the universe, casting your eyes to the heavens for effect. “I’ve battled through this cold for a week now. It won’t take me down just yet!”
Reaching forward for more cold and flu medicine, you swallowed the capsules down with a painful gulp of water and then felt your forehead. It was hotter than before, though you waved it off as you answered a couple of messages and returned to the final part of the story.
Captivated was the second story in your new trilogy series since your last series Destined had become an overnight sensation. When you sat down to pen the soulmate idea into something more than thoughts in your head, you hadn’t expected the tale to touch so many people over the world. Nor had you believed you would follow it up with To Love You, Forever, And Always either.
You originally felt that Destined was the reason why Brian and Charli’s first story Encounter was easily shared around. The protagonists had their own charms though and you could tell the fan base for this series was different from the last. They were just as eager, however, to find out when the pair would shake free from the star-crossed lovers’ trope and finally give in to the evident love they had for one another.
“Part three it’ll be,” you surmised proudly and somewhat exhaustedly after typing The End onto the electronic manuscript. Leaning back in your chair, you finally allowed yourself to succumb to the illness plaguing you. In a moment of disillusion, your mind conjured up Brian standing before you with concern etched in his eyes. You let the novel scene play out in your head, wishing he was actually here to help you out of your writing office, down to your bedroom and tuck you into bed.
Swinging gently from side to side in your desk chair, you hummed with delight. Brian Kang was your biggest self-indulgence character. You had created Park Jinyoung in Destined to infuriate your main protagonist, but Brian was the ultimate fictional guy. He was playful and kind, caring and thoughtful. He knew when Charli needed him to stand up in her weak moments, and he fought for what he felt was right even when all odds were against him. He also allowed Charli to see his vulnerability and his honesty, gaining him many fans around the world. And if all that wasn’t enough, Brian Kang was incredibly attractive.
You had really created the holy grail of a dream man.
Laughing to yourself in your sick-induced state, you smiled lazily. “Dream men are just that, Y/N. Brian Kang would never exist in this world.”
You nodded to yourself, agreeing with the proclamation, feeling more single in the moment as you did so. It was funny really, you were a successful author of Young Adult romance novels and yet you hadn’t experienced the touch of a man, let alone any ardent confessions since your university days.
“Right, it’s time for bed,” you decided before your mood plummeted further into despair. However, your limbs felt too heavy to move and so you simply closed your eyes once more, hoping a little nap would help you regain some energy to head off to bed later on.
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When you opened your eyes next, you found yourself in your darkened bedroom, smiling gently at bringing yourself to bed sometime during the night that you couldn’t remember. Sitting up slowly, you allowed your gaze to adjust to the dim morning light filtering through the small gap in the curtain, before reaching onto your nightstand for your phone.
You blinked. Instead of finding the device, you saw a kitchen bowl and face cloth resting over the edge of it.
Did you bring that with you in the middle of the night? Surely if you had been attempting to bring down your own fever, the face cloth would have been strewn somewhere in among your bedding after falling asleep with it, not neatly placed back upon the side of the bowl. Looking beyond that, you found a bottle of water with a third of the liquid missing. You did vaguely remember sipping on some water overnight, and that eased your mind from your initial confusion.
Shaking your head, and swinging your legs over the side of your bed, you placed your feet in your slippers before padding back into the office in search of your phone. Maybe you had help overnight after all, and you wanted to check if your mother had come over at your request. She had done that one year when you caught a nasty virus and couldn’t cope on your own anymore. Motherly love was definitely needed, and now that you had completed your obligations with Captivated and sent it off to your editor Lily, you would have no restrictions on who entered your creative space.
“Huh,” you said when you saw your laptop screen still open. You had a habit of closing the screen every night after turning the device off and approached it now with some confusion, trying to recollect what you last did the night before. Nothing rose to the surface immediately and you reached for your phone, blindly hitting speed dial on your mother’s number. And when her greeting rang down the receiver, you were more than perplexed.
“Hey, did you come by last night?”
“No, why?” she answered and then gasped. “Y/N, you sound awful! Did you keep working even though you were sick?!”
“You didn’t come here?” you repeated, fingertips reaching for the sticky note upon the computer screen. “Maybe it was Lily.”
“Lily is out of the country isn’t she?” your Mum reminded and you blinked several times before focusing enough to read the note you held.
 You shouldn’t have worked so hard to complete it! Your health is important too. How will I cope if you get any worse? Make sure you rest up well and drink a lot of fluids. I need my best writer in tip top shape to see where my world continues.
I made you breakfast. It’s not much, but make sure you eat before you sit down at this desk, hm?
- B.
 Dropping the note, along with letting your mouth fall ajar momentarily, you stuttered out a hasty farewell to your mum before hanging up the phone and looking to the doorway. Cautiously, you walked through your house to the kitchen where you stopped in your tracks at seeing a tea towel covering something on the bench. Gingerly peeling it back when you finally approached it, you gasped when you found several dishes underneath, along with instructions on how to heat it up.
For a split second, your mind conjured Brian up again, imagining him in your kitchen preparing all this. It would totally be just like him to make sure Charli was well fed to regain her energy from any illness.
But, you weren’t Charli Evers.
In fact, you hadn’t even based her off your personality at all, rather, a close online friend of yours who you admired a lot. So, whilst Brian would definitely go to all this trouble for Charli, you sure were clutching at straws thinking of yourself in the same situation.
Who came into your home then?
Distractedly, you heated the porridge and brewed up the tea the mystery person had prepared as well. You carried the tray of food over to your dining table when it was done and sat down before taking your first mouthful.
And then you mulled over who could possibly step into your house that had the initial B.
Maybe it wasn’t a B, you concluded when you realised no one had access to your house with that letter, even as a surname. Climbing back to your feet, you rushed to your office where you had discarded the first note and held it up to inspect the handwriting.
“It could be an R,” you mentioned out loud, then shook your head immediately. Even if the handwriting was looser than most that you knew of, it couldn’t be anything other than a B.
After examining it for a few minutes, you sat down with a huff. You’d never seen the handwriting before.
You didn’t know whether or not to be alarmed.
Had there been an intruder overnight?
Jumping back up, you persevered through the dizziness that plagued you from moving so fast, heading down the hallway to the front door. The chain was still latched and there was no sign of forced entry. Again, making your way to the back door, everything was in order.
As was every possession you owned – minus the kitchen where the food had been prepared. But even then, the dishes that had been used were rinsed and stacked by the sink.
You jumped when you heard a sudden mewl at your feet and clutched at your heart, before stooping down to pick up your cat Binks. The black cat nuzzled into you affectionately before meowing again. “I guess you want to be fed, huh?”
Walking around the counter, you stopped when you found his bowl with some food remaining. You knew Binks wouldn’t leave food overnight. Glancing at the cat, you frowned. “Who did this, Binks?”
The feline merely yawned and settled down to nap in your arms. It certainly brought the saying, cat’s got your tongue, to mind and you rolled your eyes at the infuriating situation.
Sitting down on your couch, you stared at the wall ahead of you as you tried to find an answer to all the evidence. Stroking the purring animal in your arms, you nodded determinedly.
“The only answer is that I did it in a sleep-induced state,” you announced and Binks opened his eyes to look up at you before rolling around to start licking at his back leg. You sighed. “Right, Binks?”
You were certain your cat thought you were insane. However, it was all you could find to be the answer.
“I got up and I took myself to the kitchen and prepared the ice water to cool down the fever. And went to bed. Then maybe I got up again, which is when I placed the cloth on the bowl and prepared the food. I washed my dishes, including the ones I had piling up from being too busy with work and-”
Binks leapt from your lap then, sauntering down the hallway from your side. Getting up to follow him, you ended up back in your home office, where he pounced up onto your desk, standing on the keys to your laptop. “Hey! Get off!”
Swatting the cat away from the device, you noticed that it hadn’t been turned off overnight. That was not like you at all. Logging into your account, you sat down in your desk chair and shifted back suddenly when you found a new document open.
 I bet you’re in disbelief about now, right? I guess I would be too. It wasn’t you who looked after you all night long, and did your dishes. Wow, you get behind in things when you’re focused on writing.
Don’t worry. I didn’t look around - much.
Your fever went down over a couple of hours whilst I moved back and forth helping you out. It’s the least I can do after you’ve spent so much time with me. Well, we’ve yet to officially meet.
One day.
- B (your biggest fan)
PS. I fed Binks. He really does have quite the personality.
 “Okay!” you sounded in an octave higher, laughing a little to yourself at the same time. “Someone was definitely here. Who is B and how does this person know so much personal information?!”
You were too preoccupied to realise the document to Captivated was still open behind the other one.
And instead of saying The End as it once had, it had been deleted and replaced with To Be Continued.
_________________
Part 2
All rights reserved © prettywordsyouleft
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4dtk · 4 years
Text
stuck with you
pairing: enemy!journalist!haechan x journalist!reader
genre: angst, fluff, humour, enemies to lovers (hope i did the trope justice tbh TT)
warnings: cursing, f words lmao, i mention stranger things a lot in this??? mainly bc i just finished watching it w a friend. i also only use ‘haechan’ when narrating the story so i don’t get confused! the timeline for this is Very Weird as well bc like i didn’t consider how long a pandemic would last…… so Uhm. pls just excuse the weird ass time sequence. also referenced yangyang’s bastard child behaviour from dream plan where he packs his things messily and kun had to mf intervene and yangyang had the audacity to go like “see, this is how u get ppl to pack for you, now i don’t have to do anything” 💀
word count: 8k (a headache to proofread...)
A/N: first time trying an e2l trope and im not sure if it was done ok??? i didn't want it to feel too rushed so i tried to spread out the days as much as i could!! i also included small snippets of their life w the other so it won’t seem like the fic is just focusing on the e2l concept! was inspired tons by the lyrics of stuck with u by ariana grande and jb, so that song is definitely something you can listen to if you read this! hope you enjoy ^^
[day 1]
"you're insufferable," you groan, reluctantly handing over the remote control for the hotel's television after some unsuccessful scrolling.
hotels never exactly had much range anyway. 
you were very much already dreading the time ahead with the male, sadly having been stuck in quarantine not even half a day with haechan. 
offering to go to a neighbouring country to report on the rising covid-19 situation, you didn't expect your rival to tag along, no doubt seeking to craft up a better story than you would.
and so, you were now nudging the remote control into his waiting palm with a roll of your eyes. you hoped it emphasised your annoyance with him even a little, standing up to prepare a cup of tea before bed. 
"are you going to keep watching television while i sleep?" you ask a genuine question, peeking at him through the mirror of the vanity that sat outside the bathroom.
he just shrugs with a tired sigh, turning his attention back to the cartoon playing in front of him. 
"okay, well, keep to your side of the bed and i'll stay in mine. we need to be social distancing, anyway."
there's a hint of "okay, loser" mumbled under his breath, but you pay it no thought as you finish your tea and brush your teeth before you skillfully set up a fortress made out of pillows.
"ow! what the hell?" 
"your leg was in the way, jeez! move it, and i'll stop annoying you," you said, putting up the last of your requested pillows beside where haechan currently sat. 
taking one last glance at haechan, you wondered when the lockdown in your country would last before they start letting people fly in. for now, you were trapped with the nightmare himself in a sad hotel room, with only a bed to share.
"goodnight," he tells you, but the sardonic way he says it irks you to the point where you settle for silence instead. the only thing that drones on are the voices of the cartoon, soon fading as you feel into a dreamless sleep.
[day 4]
"this virus thing is probably driving me insane by day, and you, lee haechan, are adding on to it!"
"no headlines, no idea what style to write in, minimal pictures-" the doorbell to the hotel room interrupts your current rant, prompting you to storm off to answer the call with an annoyed look. 
"what now?" taken aback by your quick response, the housekeeping girl retracts with downturned eyebrows and a voice hesitant to speak. your roommate comes to the rescue almost immediately when he's heard the commotion.
you watch as he sends her a smile and a wink, deflating when he's let her in to clean up the room. you're not sure why you can't keep your eyes off the both of them as they converse, blaming it mostly on your hatred for the male.
with the last of her duties fulfilled, you offer to help her with the cleaning supplies as an apology, but she cuts you off almost immediately. there's a linger in her step, however, as she walks the short hallway to the door, evident in wanting haechan to send her off as he received her.
turning back to call him, he holds up a hand as he types down his opening lines to an article, prompting you to shoot the housekeeper girl another apologetic look.
"sorry again," you mumble, letting out a sigh at how this was all playing out. day four and you were already making enemies with the hotel crew.
"maybe day forty-one is where i fall in love with lee haechan," you scoffed, perhaps listing down all the unfortunate things that could happen while you were in quarantine.
one of them was catching feelings for your rival.
rolling your eyes, you settled on the bed to catch a few Zs as he continued to work on his article, though you weren't exactly sure about the weight your words held.
[day 9]
"haechan, what is this?" you ask with an eyebrow raised, his dirty boxers barely hanging off your finger. 
haechan only groans at that, knowing you were relentless in the laundry. even in a pandemic, he was sure you'd prioritise your clothes first.
"jesus! don't go picking up my underwear just like that!" he snatches it from you, folding it neatly and placing it next to where his luggage sat. unfortunately, yours was right beside his. 
"you think just because you're doing the laundry you're able to look through a man's prized possessions-!"
your jaw drops, "it was near the sink, haechan! i don't want to look at the checkered pattern on your boxers when i brush my teeth. i don't want it near my face either." 
haechan groans yet again, running a hand through his hair in frustration before turning back to the computer, a blank document opened up in front of him.
despite gathering findings, interviewing healthcare workers and serving the public alongside frontline staff, he had deleted every attempt at writing.
there's a rumble from the bathroom, perhaps from your upset stomach or the choked pipe, but sometimes they sounded too similar he couldn't tell it apart. haechan stifles a laugh when there's a "fuck!" echoing behind the door, though unsure if he should help you or not.
when haechan hears another crash, he comes running without hesitation with a face morphed into furrowed eyebrows and a tilt of the head.
"don't just stand there, you moron!" 
haechan snaps out of his daze to assist you off the floor, swiftly helping you even more off the floor as he carries you to the bed with a stiff one arm. you notice his other hand hanging awkwardly, probably not knowing what to do with it before you feel the soft sheets under your butt.
he gets to work within a minute, fishing for an ointment and some bandages his mother forced him to bring. he remembers it as he always has: a caring mother looking out for her son, maybe a little too much sometimes. 
haechan is thankful for his mother, now, for the stray bandages laying around in his pouch.
you watch in silence as he cleans the cut with alcohol, wincing when his hand hadn't even touched your skin.
"my hand isn't even on your skin yet! jeez, calm down." 
you shake your head, holding onto his bicep to halt his arm, "just use water, please."
exhaling in exasperation, you wonder if you've pissed him off tenfold when he leaves for the bathroom with a side-eyed glance, though not hostile.
"problematic," haechan whispers, dabbing a wet cloth over the wound carefully before applying the ointment and securing the bandages. 
"your words contradict your actions so much, haechan. i never know what you're thinking." sighing, you pull your leg away from his hold after he's done with the bandages, making your way to the bathroom and leaving him in his thoughts.
"why do you want to know?"
haechan gets silence; the lock of the bathroom audibly turns to signal another wall put up between the two of you. with another frustrated groan, the boy plops down on the chair to work on his article with the right words forming in his mind.
even if he was the one who asked, he wasn't sure if he was ready to tell you.
[day 13]
"stranger things is freaking me the fuck out, man!" haechan whispered, ignoring your pleads and groans to continue writing. 
"haechan! give me the damn laptop! i don't even know why you brought an HDMI cable when it doesn't work with the television system here!"
"well, we got one that matches it, didn't we?" he said, eyes peeled to the screen that showed the young boy, will, in the upside-down.
"you mean you did!" you shoved him, ready to disconnect the devices before haechan held you back, clearly entranced by the next sequence of eleven being able to see will in a pool of salt. 
"ugh, god, i don't even know why people watch the show!" you spill with sourness, knowing the show was praised for its excellent acting and writing.
haechan raises an eyebrow, turning to you with a strangely slow speed. 
"stranger things have received multiple awards, and you didn't give any other reason. are you scared?"
when you struggle to find words, haechan laughs at his revelation, hiding his pearly whites behind his hand as he continues to make fun of you.
"yeah yeah, i'm scared! so what?" 
"'oh haechan! oh no~ i'm terrified, would you care to provide some comfort?' jeez, don't worry, man, i'll protect you." there's a cheeky glimmer in his eyes and a cocky smirk on his face which you very much want to wipe off with the disinfectant in the toilet.
"it's not all that bad, c'mon! give it a-" turning back to the tv, the sudden attack of the demogorgon lashing out at the camera has the male screaming, hiding behind your body in fear.
"you were saying, mr superman?" you deadpan, unlatching his arms around your waist as you sink deeper into the sheets with your phone in hand.
[day 17]
haechan thrashes in his sleep, almost knocking the wine glass you had in your hands when he crosses over the pillow barrier you made. 
"what in the hell-" you winced, keeping an eye on the male should he have any more outbursts that would ruin both wine night and the stuff you were working on for the article. 
with tipsy hands, your keyboard keys unconsciously write out a letter of disdain and confusion regarding haechan, the boy sleeping next to you with a cute drooling face and curly hair.
with beautiful tan skin like that, you wondered why he didn't model instead. with a voice as impressive as his, you wondered why he didn't sign a contract. with natural hosting capabilities, you wondered why didn't fucking get the place of a talk show host. 
because man, he can get pretty bothersome sometimes.
[day 20]
the next few days pass by with a breeze.
despite not knowing how the current pandemic will turn out, you find haechan more bearable, his habits being dumped in the past with a wave of a hand.
petty arguments occur, of course, until one of you brushes off the matter like nothing.
today was one of the days you won't back down.
there's worry evident on your face, eyes scanning through every last document on the stupid laptop. fingers travel fast over the keyboard as the realisation slowly dawns on you. 
with slumped shoulders, you take a deep breath before turning to the male.
"what do you mean you accidentally deleted my article? i know we're sharing the damn laptop, but we established that you stay on your files and i stay on mine."
the other waved his hand, "i did not touch any of your files, (y/n), i'm not sure what happened."
"how could you not know? what the hell? i had good content on it, but now i have to spend more hours reorganising the news and interview answers and everything else in my notes. thanks, lee haechan."
"maybe if you weren't so caught up in me trying to sabotage your place in the publication team, then you would've believed me." he shrugged, taking a seat on the one bed like nothing.
you scoffed, arms crossing across your body. "funny how you mention sabotage because a villain never reveals their motive. that's why you came with me, didn't you?"
haechan stuck his tongue out to the side of his mouth, eyes blinking and rolling like an 8-ball that it sickened you to the core.
"villain? i'm the villain?"
"was i not clear?" you hiss, stepping closer to the male.
"no, make it more precise, please. i wanna hear it word for word. spit it out, coward."
with every word, you plunged your finger into his chest, looking deep into his eyes. "you're set out to take my place for department editor, where you know i'm best at."
"and that department would be...?" he crossed his arms, looking down at you with scorn you wished you could slap off his face.
"the..." you gulp with his face all up in yours, eyes boring as he awaits your answer, no doubt losing confidence at your realisation.
"the world depart...ment? you love to travel, right?" you trail off, biting your lip in anxiety when you remember how he was on the plane. you don't exactly remember whether he was more excited or scared.
"wrong! try again."
"politics?" you propose.
haechan's face contorts into disbelief, with his mouth twisted with perplex and eyebrows furrowed. "me? politics?"
your mouth runs dry at the roadblock you've faced, and as that annoying, stupid smirk grows, your hatred for him increases by the charts.
"naming departments i'd rather die than join, running your mouth, accusing me of deleting your files..." haechan shakes his head dramatically, rolling his eyes and letting out a fat sigh.
"you think i wanna be stuck here with your infuriating ass? god, you're so entitled, aren't you? aren't you?!"
"talking like you own the place, talking like you're the only one in this world, talking like- mhfh-"
within three angry steps, you were across the room.
within three booming steps, your hands were on his face.
within three significant steps, you were kissing lee haechan.
"you never learn to shu..." with horror, you're brought back from the trance with widened eyes.
"oh, god, sorry. what. what the hell. what the fuck?" you whisper, pushing the boy away with both hands in a panic, trying to highlight your scorn for him by wiping your lips on your sleeve.
had you liked it?
the other scurried to the balcony in a frenzy while you collected yourself in the bathroom, although no amount of water could calm your nerves. 
with shaky words in bed, you both agreed to never talk about it again.
[day 25]
"hey, i can see your damn annotations on my article, (y/n). will you stop it?" haechan whines, making you second guess if he was joking or not.
for the nth time that day, you roll your eyes and proceed to sip from your cup of gin tonic that haechan desperately wanted you to try. it was... a refreshing taste, but hell, you wouldn't drink this even if it was the last beverage on earth.
"i'm just giving my feedback, be thankful i didn't bring up that stupid kiss five days ago. bleugh." 
haechan falls quiet at that, fingers lingering over the keyboard as he typed out some note with the speed of a sloth's. 
"hey, call me donghyuck. that's my actual name," he mumbles, glancing at you through his bangs while he awaits your reply.
"donghyuck? is haechan an alias?"
the boy shrugs, "i don't know, maybe. my friends gave it to me when i was younger, and i just stuck with it."
"full sun? your friend gave it to you, sure." you grin with a gesture of your hand, almost spilling the gin in the clear glass before breaking into small laughter with the other.
[day 28]
"hey! hey, what the hell?" you whisper, feeling the boy huddle up to you in lightning speed. 
"what is wrong with you?" you whisper-shout, nudging him off your body as his phone screen remains as the only thing illuminating his face.
"sorry, i- i was watching stranger things while i was shitting and after i cleaned up... i heard something and bolted out of there."
"so now you're butt naked? hyuck, ew!" you groan, thankful for the sheets that were covering your body and his junk. his reluctance to get off you didn't seem to bother you as much as earlier, but you still wished he wasn't literally naked against you.
"go put on your underwear, you big baby. i'll be here when you come out. no demogorgon is going to come out, for real."
"no no, i was watching season two and it was that big shadow thingy that freaked me out. can't you feel this poor boy shivering?" haechan sighed, eyes never leaving the corridor that led to the bathroom.
"i can, and i also can feel your dick. please get dressed, or you're sleeping on the floor," you mumble, pulling the sheets to cover your freezing body.
[day 31] 
your face hits something soft, cuddling into it even further because of its warmth before you realise there was only one other thing that would be warm in the room.
haechan.
your breath shakes, and your eyes widen as you pull yourself away from his embrace. your subtle movement leaves him thrashing around, though, and his arms tighten around your figure slowly and endearingly.
gulping, you will your hands to stay in their place, opting to freeze to death although there are hints of heat crawling onto your face.
when you wake up, you find that his hand's in yours and maybe you were searching for one wrong thing. an anomaly, an exception. it fit in yours perfectly, however, his tanned skin glowing lightly under the rays of sun filtering through the curtains.
you hoped he didn't realise the small shift of your fingers as they enclosed around his hand.
[day 32]
"what are you doing out here?" haechan asked quietly, peeking around the sliding door before joining you on the chilly balcony. it wasn't much, but it was still different and refreshing from the old, stagnant aircon air that was blowing in the hotel room.
"can't sleep," you whisper. you had your arms around your figure cautiously, as if it could protect you from all the bad, evil and terror in the world. at this point, you weren't sure what was it that you were feeling, but it sure didn't involve entertaining haechan's teasing. 
luckily, he bit his tongue from making the usual snarky remarks.
"it's two in the morning, what's up?" 
you shake your head in reply, watching the empty streets as the last light in the apartment across you switches off. sure, at two in the morning, pavements were dusty clean, and the birds were sleeping, but there would always be younger boys smoking along the road, or a drunken group of friends laughing about a past memory. 
now that the pandemic forced everyone into their homes, everything was pretty much dead. there wasn't that excitement you felt when you saw a late-night kiss shared between two lovers or the snug hug of a child to his father who was working overtime that day.
"nothing's up, hyuck, it's fine. you can get back to sleep if you want."
maybe today you two were the one causing the ruckus this time, though. haechan may have let his words slipped, and at that moment, you knew you regretted that bloom in your chest when his lips met yours.
"you're so hard to read, (y/n). i want you to be able to trust me, tell me what's going on."
"why do you wanna know anyway? so you can expose me of my bad habits and weak points?" you whisper, eyes trained on the flickering lamppost a few yards away.
"there you go again! again with the sabotage?" haechan scoffed, exiting the small space and stepping back into the room of mixed emotions.
"is this just about your feelings for me?" 
haechan laughed, "my feelings? might i remind you that you were the one who kissed me full on the lips twelve days ago? what was that all about? i wanna talk about it, even though we said we wouldn't! i wanna talk about why you hate me so much. i wanna talk about why your emotions are so contradictive!" 
your mouth hangs open as you sputter out a heated reply, but instead gets interrupted with a knock on the door. 
"keep quiet, you damn teenagers! i don't need your petty fights at two in the morning!" with padded feet, the guest returns to his room and slams the door to emphasise his complaint. swallowing, your mind goes blank as it focuses only on one question.
"why do you want to know so much lee haechan? what are you gaining out of this? if it's not sabotaging, then what is it?!" you whisper, standing your ground as with the first argument. 
your throat is clenched up, and your fists are balled up tightly with nails digging into your palm. your heartbeat races like a fast car and your breathing's laboured in the cold room. there's no movement for a second, though they feel like minutes on end as haechan struggles to answer your question.
"what is it, lee donghyuck?" you cry out again, the sparkle in your eyes shining brightly from the tears of your never-ending dispute. he wished it was from the moonlight, instead. he wished the two of you were laughing over the rim of wine glasses and sharing the mischievous glimmer of the moon in your eyes.
"it's nothing. don't mind it." the other turns to catch up on sleep, leaving you to bite your lip.
"now you're doing it, now you're the one doing it. just tell me, you dumbass!" you mumble, pulling on his pyjama sleeve and tugging you to him.
"i like you, okay! it's out there now, i like you a lot, but you make it feel like a crime to do it," haechan whispers, "whatever. fuck this."
"no- what- no, we'll talk this out." you propose, adjusting your grip on his wrist with the curl of your fingers.
the male shakes his head and snatches his arm back, "no, forget it, and i'd prefer if you left me alone, (y/n)."
even with the warmth of his body next to yours, your body felt frozen and stiff. even with the thick duvet cover over you, you felt out of place in the stale hotel room, with colour becoming black and white, they merge into grey as the moonlight shone without a care for your problems.
there's action on the balcony when your eyes flutter open in the morning, noticing the quiet way haechan observes those rushing to work as well as social distancing officers making their rounds.
his eyes look hopeful and youthful, different from the tired ones the night before, or rather, this morning. you hadn't forgotten the angry neighbour banging on the door, and you definitely hadn't forgotten about how much you've wounded haechan this morning.
with a soft knock, you let him know of your presence and you just miss the way his eyes soften at your bed hair and messy appearance. his gaze turns hard in a second as he turns back to the apartment across yours, the balcony door showing your reflection of how hesitant you were.
haechan wished he could take your hands in his and accept your apology in a heartbeat, but he stayed seated and waited for whatever you wanted to say.
"don't run off, please." there's a shameful hand on his shoulders, and he's dying to get up when he sees your downcast eyes in the reflection across the street.
"i was too caught up in getting department head that i... didn't consider other possibilities. even the possibility of you uhm... liking me. it's still a weird concept to me, especially with how much we bicker."
"i'm sorry i didn't stay to hear out your feelings and rather, i just talked over you instead. i'm not sure if you want to accept this or not, but i want to open up—about this, about your feelings and... i don't know how much i've masked my emotions, i just know that we need to communicate."
the doorbell interrupts your apology, but you internally thank the housekeeping for bringing breakfast for the two of you.
with silence over breakfast, you weren't sure how the other felt as he scoffed down the croissant and almost burned his tongue with the coffee he ordered.
[day 33] 
the boy barely watches the television and instead, reads over the article you were working on. seeing as it was already there when he logged on, he skimmed through it out of curiosity, finding that you were rephrasing the messy typos and sentences frantically on your notes.
haechan never forgot the way you were typing away on the laptop, eyes reading and rereading the sentences to make sure they made sense, to make sure they were clear to the reader. 
the argument had taken a toll on you, too. he sees it in the way your eyes sink when your words turn out choppy and lacking, he sees it in the way you lug your body to the bathroom after a late night, he sees it in the way you struggle to hold your smile while attending an interview. 
'haechan. you confuse me. i'm not...' the note below it trails off, piquing his curiosity at what it had in store.
'haechan.' big and bold letters it wrote, with a few dozen question marks below it. your writing skills shine through even in an informal note about your self-proclaimed rival, each line prompting the other to read more.
'you confuse me. i'm not sure what you're at but, it doesn't seem natural for you to tag along with someone you hate, right? that's what i was thinking too.'
'jeez, i remember hating when suyeon told me you were coming along. i didn't believe her one bit until she showed me your plane ticket and the hotel rooms next to each other. god, and when i came here, it was a day of interviewing before the damn government decided to close flights and force us into a room together.'
'i heard that other people had to be separated. i didn't know why we were the unlucky two that had to be put in a room together. i wished we didn't, almost. of course, you annoyed me when we first moved in. hogging the tv to no end, leaving your dirty underwear everywhere, running your mouth just like at our workplace.'
'i couldn't take it, maybe. sure, my brother has similar antics, but there was just something about you that just set me off, you know? i wouldn't have thought it was the opposite, or at least, i think so.'
'i'm counting the days. day 17 and i'm not sure why i feel this bubbling feeling inside me. of course, there's anger—i'm sure it's there, but there's also this other thing i get whenever i look at you.'
'my heart clenches up, and my hands become clammy, but it couldn't be a crush, right? i would've wasted my breath shouting, and my strength whacking your shoulder.' that makes haechan chuckle and look over at you where the soft light dances over your face.
'and then i started imagining. how would your arms wrap around me? how would your infuriating laughter, which somehow turned out to be so contagious, feel in the crook of my neck? yikes, that was cheesy.'
'what would it feel like if we fell in love for one night? where would you bring me and what would we eat? would we make out in your car like unruly teenagers?' 
'what would it be like to love you? it's dumb, isn't it? i don't know. i've liked this bickering thing we had going on, and it's amusing to see you one-up me. i'm not sure if i want that to change and i'm not sure if you want us to, either.'
'maybe i'm wrong, and i'm the only one in this thing. this is so stupid, writing while he's sitting next to me. i'll regret this, maybe. goodnight.'
haechan sighs, closing the device in thought, confused at the words he wasn't exactly supposed to read. had you done this on purpose? he was sharing the laptop with you...
the boy brushed it off, placing the laptop on the vanity before adjusting your side of the duvet, hoping he could find the right words. with hesitant steps, he keeps to his side of the bed, thinking, thinking, thinking. 
when he couldn't no more, haechan fell into the spell of slumber in the comfortable hotel room.
[day 34]
"tea?" he asks from the bathroom as the door clicks behind you, returning from the short hotel walk with a new keychain hanging from your sling bag.
"yeah sure, thanks." 
the water runs as he fills up the kettle as the constant whir of the aircon and the conversation on the television keeps you company in the vast quietness of the room. 
you weren't sure if you should say anything, but when you saw the dishevelled appearance of your roommate, you knew you had to bring up the argument and apology.
"haechan, about our... feelings. do you want to talk about them?" you whispered, a reply reaching your ears in the form of his spoon against the porcelain mug.
haechan hands you the drink wordlessly, sitting on the chair at the vanity before sipping cautiously at the tea. there are unexchanged glances between the two of you before he sighs at your expectant hand tapping the sheets.
"i think it's about time we did," he mumbled, dragging the laptop off the wooden table with anxiety. the other opened it without saying anything, catching you by surprise when the mouse hovers over your note.
"hae- donghyuck! no! what the hell?"
he holds up a hand and clicks on it anyway, making your heart drop to your stomach as he turned the device towards you.
"read the bottom." haechan whispers as you pull the laptop closer to you, settling it on your lap as he observed your expressions carefully.
'i read it, i'm sorry.' you look at him and lift up a hand to prepare to whack him, a defeated sigh escaping you before you carried on.
'was it wrong to read it? of course, and i cannot apologise more for doing shit like that when we still have unsolved tension between us in this small ass room. it was incorrect, but.'
'do you feel the same as me? is bickering all we have to do? why can't we work anything out? they're the questions i keep asking myself after i read your letter.'
'i guess i was too caught up in the fight and not wanting to be the loser that i... can't deny that i've never thought about wanting to get to know you, even if you were that sought out to be my destined enemy.'
'when we fought earlier, you kissed me. i know we said not to mention it, but, uhm, it was good. i liked it. i'm not sure if the reason why you did it was because of the reason you mentioned in the note, but at the time, i assumed it was to shut me up. i thought something would happen after, though you pushed me away and apologised right away.'
'it was a far off dream that i had, but i think it was after i bandaged your foot. you said that you didn't know what was going on in my mind, and i told you.'
'it was like, i was granted an insight into an alternate world, another universe where you didn't feel the strain, where you legitimately assumed i was going for your position.'
'you scoffed when i confessed, right then and there, on day 9. i was counting, too, and it was a scary, confusing dream. i think that's why i held it off as long as i could until your words puzzled and angered me further because you just didn't get it.'
'you scoffed and told me to get lost, pushing on my shoulders where we fought on the balcony for everyone to see. you never spoke to me, you never mentioned my article nor the interviews. we never joked over wine, and we always kept to our side of the bed.'
'i was convinced that heaven wanted me to stay away from you and your heart. maybe it was broken too many times, and you had someone up there looking out for you.'
'i feel like i'm copying off the textbook of some greek mythology starter pack, but i'm for real! no kidding.' you smiled, looking at him with nervous eyes at the small joke he put in.
'i guess whoever put that dream in my sleep really wanted us not to be together because i think i would've told you i liked you on the spot itself. i let my conscious get the best of me.'
'i know this is a lazy way of conveying my feelings, and i wished i could do it with words, but i feel like you wouldn't believe me otherwise. i rushed it this morning when you went on your morning walk around the hotel and when you let me know of your stroll in a soft voice, i wanted nothing more than to get you in my arms as we wake up to the housekeeping service.'
'i didn't want any more tension between us, and i didn't want to be interrupted by your alarm while we avoid each other more. it hurts seeing you escape the room in haste. you said it was weird for me to tag along with someone i hate, too, and that someone was you. i guess you found out why.'
looking up, you found him right in front of you, mouth dry from his reply to your letter. with a gulp, you leaned forward to meet his lips halfway.
"i'm sorry to whoever's up there," he whispers, prompting a grin and a laugh out of you.
the laptop is forgotten on the bed as haechan situates himself over you, clutching your shoulder gently while his lips move quickly, fast to make up for lost time. 
"wait wait, wait, you're not playing me, are you?" you mumble in return, reluctantly pulling away while witnessing the way his eyes soften at your guard still up. haechan shakes his head forlornly, tongue pressing up against the side of his mouth nervously.
"no, i'm not, (y/n)," he says quietly with as much sincerity he can muster, removing his hand from your shoulder with a forced smile. 
"okay." there's a shakiness to your voice, but when you bring his lips back to yours, it gives you a rush of confidence. your skin is burning up, and your hands can't stop wandering as his lips capture yours, repeatedly moving against yours like a trance.
you grant haechan access to your mouth with a whimper, melting into his embrace as his arms wrap tighter around your figure. his eagerness lingers when he pushes forward, straddling your lap as his leg nudges the laptop.
"wait, hyuck, wait, the laptop!" you joke, placing the device on the floor before getting back into the kiss with just as much fervour. within a minute or so, the other breaks away to say the words you so hated to hear:
"we... we need to talk. we can't just kiss the fight off, although i very much like to," haechan murmurs the last part, making you stifle a smile. 
you nod quickly, repeating the word "okay" like a robot. your hands naturally travel from his arms down to his fingers, and you clutch them like your life depended on it.
"we have... established, that i like you, correct?" haechan whispers, scooting closer as his tea-ridden breath surrounds you. from here, you could even smell the buttered croissant he ate this morning.
it made you smile, something simple as that.
"why- why are you laughing (y/n)?" he asks anxiously, eyes darting to find the reason why you found this so funny.
"no. no no no, i'm thinking of... the croissant you ate just now, and," you sigh, resting your head on his broad shoulder. 
"i'm thinking of the way your eyes light up when you show me the articles you idolise so much, and i'm thinking of the way you cuddle up to me whenever we watch stranger things." 
"i'm thinking of the way you thought i wouldn't give you a chance, even though i've been pondering on the same thing as you. i'm thinking of the things that make up lee haechan, lee donghyuck. yes, you like me, and yes i like you, but i guess i haven't told you the reason."
"i hated you, i really did. i found every reason to convince my mind to hate you. gaining trust, signing up for events you didn't know shit about, sucking up to the seniors, stealing my friends when they didn't know your personality. the personality i didn't even want to know because i was too busy in my little bubble."
"assuming you'd want to get department head was the cherry on top, because why else would you want to tag along? that was the factor that convinced me and confirmed my suspicions from day one."
you grunt in opposition, clearly not liking the truth that was spilling from your lips. haechan deserved to know, however. you kept your eyes trained on his lap where his hands were holding yours in support, crumbling from the blindness that caused your hatred. 
"so from then, the plane ride, immigration, the cab to the interview place, the cab back, the hotel room, my hatred for you boiled over." you listed, voice breaking as you looked haechan in the eye. 
"it was stupid of me to assume, to assume the worst of you when i didn't even know you. i wasn't even sure why i felt so bitter looking at you, but the way you acted, the way you whined, worked me up so much that i figured that was how you were."
"now when i'm sitting here with the curtains drawn, i can see why you're so attractable and easy to talk to and easy-going and bright that my friends keep talking to you."
"i can see why the seniors turn to you because you're reliable and hardworking without uttering a single word."
"i can see why you wanted to hop on this flight with me because you're always curious about the world and how you can expand your skill set."
and as you said word after word, haechan observes you with a soothing hand against your forearms. his eyes shine for a different reason, for the lost time he could've had if the two of you didn't have this massive barrier. a massive barrier that's been up for the longest time. 
brick by brick, the wall is being torn down. as you hold haechan's face in the stillness of the room, you feel closer to him than you've ever felt and his tears match your frustrated ones. 
choking on sobs, delayed apologies were all you could whisper.
"i'm sorry, i'm sorry, really. we fought so bad that day, and i was so goddamn insensitive..." you sigh, swallowing a lump when his hand reached up to wipe the tears. with a blocked nose, you breathe shakily as housekeeping interrupts the moment. 
you nod towards the door as he stood up slowly to reveal the same housekeeping girl. she cleaned up the bathroom and wardrobe quietly as the two of you stood awkwardly in the small space. she had left the sheets since everyone was practically stuck in, anyway.
haechan nudges you toward the door with a shove, shooting the same housekeeping girl a small smile and a bow as an apology to the previous run-in.
"he confessed his feelings?" she inquired softly, noticing the tear marks on your face.
you bit your lip, "yeah."
"that's good, he's finally not a coward." she laughs, folding the used towels and placing them with her.
you leaned against the door, asking for an explanation with your puzzled look.
"he was someone i liked, before. we had classes back in high school. it was just a dumb crush, honestly." the housekeeping girl shrugs, resting her head on her fist in thought.
"i think he liked me, and i did too, but we didn't do much except for exchange looks and flirt because both of us were just too scared." she shakes her head and adjusts the disinfectant spray bottle, fidgeting with the nozzle.
"i'm glad he had enough courage to admit his feelings." 
nodding along to her statement, she bids you farewell as her figure fades with each step, leaving you with a sense of calmness to the end of this situation.
[day 38]
"is... is this okay?" haechan asks, arm hovering over your body while waiting for your confirmation. you smile and nod, sinking into his side as you venture in the third season of stranger things together. 
"don't you think we should be working on our articles?" you whisper, looking up at him from where you were with raised eyebrows.
the boy opens and closes his mouth in thought, gesturing to the television with an exaggerated expression. 
"stranger things, ma'am."
you click your tongue and sigh with a smile, turning back to the show as you try to relax for an online interview in a few hours.
[day 39]
"what do you say about my set-up?" haechan nudges you, proud of the hangout area he prepared on the balcony. although small, he had no trouble making it look comfortable. 
with a smile, you pop open the wine to celebrate the last scheduled interview for the trip, clinking glasses with haechan in the setting sun.
the country you were supposed to return to was slowly opening up flights for those stranded overseas and as refreshing as a different environment was, you missed home and the warmness of it.
you missed the office and your desk. hell, you even missed the mediocre coffee from the pantry.
with the last of the wine finishing, haechan pours half into your glass and the other into his, clinking one last time before you one-shot the beverage.
the high of the alcohol is gradually brought down by the mellow atmosphere and colours of twilight. as pink and orange cross over on the horizon, haechan mumbles a low "c'mere" to you in the darkness.
you hum in response and get up from your seat, bringing a pillow with you as haechan shifts to make space. sinking naturally into his arms, you sigh while you try to contain a smile full of content.
"this is nice," you admit, the corners of your lips disobeying your command, prompting you to shoot him a smile. haechan nods against your hair, a comfortable arm around your waist while you trace the tan skin of his arm.
the other taps your waist repeatedly, turning in response as he whispers out a question that makes your heart melt.
"can i kiss you?" you grin, slipping a hand around his neck and pulling him in right away. haechan's caught by surprise, laughing into your lips and striving to savour the moment as much as he could. 
a shout from across the hotel distracts you from the kiss. looking up, you realise it was the apartment resident opposite you shooting you a 'rock on' gesture.
"you guys are not fighting anymore! congrats!" you both stifle a snort as you wave back to the resident, sighing in relief when their balcony door slides shut.
"should we go inside, m'lady?" haechan giggles, replying in the form of a nod, cleaning up the area while you head in.
[day 41]
"i didn't think they'd be letting flights in so early," you mumble, folding your clothes neatly as your vision shifts to haechan... shoving his fair share of apparel into his luggage.
"donghyuck... what the hell?" you roll your eyes, shoving the boy softly as you took over the task at hand. switching personalities almost immediately, haechan fakes an interview segment with exaggerated tones.
"see, everyone, this is how you convince someone to do the work for you," the boy lays on the bed with a satisfied expression, "now i don't have to do anyth- ow!"
"if we ever live together, maybe i should punish you by doing the laundry and then folding it," you grunt, working at the speed faster than you expected while you fold shirt after shirt.
"are you proposing we move in together?" haechan peeks through an open eye, curiosity dripping from his tone. he tried to feign nonchalance but awaiting your answer felt like a weight on his heart.
your next words lifted that weight, a seemingly invisible force bringing his upper body off the bed as he stares at you in shock.
"maybe, not now but... in the future, maybe," you mumble the last part, focusing on the clothes to prevent the male from seeing the fluster on your face.
"for real?" haechan sits up, biting his lip to contain his excitement as your confirmation. 
"we'll be all stupidly domestic and shit, and i'll say i love you five years from now before you go off for work if you want that and stuff," your voice goes lower and quieter, especially towards the end, biting off way more than you could chew.
"aw! i love you too!" haechan gushes, bringing you into an embrace as your hands go limp, scrambling to explain your emphasis on the 'future'.
"d-donghyuck, i meant the future, not now..." you manage to spit out, hoping you need not answer his queries any more. your mind blanks out at the current situation, wishing you hadn't said those dumb things.
he grins into your neck, "i know, i'm just answering for future me."
you groan and escape the hug with a roll of your eyes, "yuck, too cheesy!" the boy just lets out a laugh, watching the way you fold his clothes despite your initial annoyance.
[day 42]
suyeon switches between the two of you in disbelief, finger crooked at the ambiguity of "we like each other".
"wha-" suyeon doesn't get the chance to finish the sentence before you shoot her a thumbs up, grabbing haechan by the arm and your stuff with the other.
you were happy to leave the office after a quick debrief since you two had reported to the office right after arriving at the airport, relieved when you heard he'd spare a few more days for your articles to be cleaned up.
"so, (y/n), what would you like to do now?" haechan looks at you through the reflective material of the elevator, observing the nervous wringing of your fingers.
you're glad for the material protecting your face because there's a smile that you struggle to keep as his soft, gentle voice carries through the quiet space.
the anxiety ends when the lift sounds, prompting your eyes to trail down his arm. your hand moves on its own accord, grabbing his last finger with yours as you proceed into the lift sheepishly, not missing the way haechan's eyes show his bright smile behind the mask.
"maybe i'll get to know you more, lee donghyuck."
haechan lets out a gasp, "have you not learned about me enough? scandalous." 
you feign a punch in his direction, the luggage beside you tripping over its wheels due to your swift movement. the only response you get is a giggle from the other as he tightens his pinky around yours, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek right above your face mask just as the elevator doors open.
"man, i really do want to punch you now," you mutter as you let haechan lead you, wanting nothing more than to rest in the arms of your enemy-turned-friend? enemy-turned-someoneyoulike?
you weren’t exactly sure.
he doesn't answer during the walk to the main road, nor the ride back to your home, the only constant thing being the way he admires your profile in the taxi, shrugging when you counter with a playful "what?". 
"nothing," haechan grins.
[there are more days to come]
sure, day forty-one may not have been the day you fell in love with haechan, nor the day where he outwardly claims you as his lover.
but, taking it slow never hurt anyone, either.
you know it in the way he tells you he can't go in unless he's invited and you see it in the way he asks if he can switch the television on while you prepare some drinks.
like the hotel, you know it in the way he asks if he can kiss you and the way he deepens his kisses with caution.
you appreciate it in the way he quickly apologises for a personal question, while visibly relaxing as you brush it off with a smile.
with hours pass, day forty-two becomes day forty-three, and haechan remains as chivalrous as always.
days pass, and you submit your articles. weeks pass, and you get to know the boy more and more. months pass, and you feel his love in the way he plays with your fingers in the dark and pulls you close under the sheets.
even if you hadn't acknowledged the love between the two of you, that note you wrote half-drunk matched the way you felt now—with how your heart clenches up and with how your grin never leaves your face with haechan around.
there are more days to come with lee haechan, lee donghyuck, even if it meant getting stuck together in a hotel room with unsaid words.
358 notes · View notes
steve0discusses · 3 years
Text
S5 Ep6: Joey Wheeler is on Fire, Yet Again
Came down with a little sickness-not the biggie, just a little sly guy. But I took some meds, I’m a little floaty, I’ve only been listening to baroque music all morning for some reason? And I hate baroque music usually? But I’ll leave it to bro to tell me if this is fluid enough.
Just so you know, these caps were kind of a hot mess for a while and some of them read like that Garfield in of hot eat the food comic until...today. So pls don’t judge me, Judge my damn DMV where no one was following Covid regulations because I’m pretty sure that’s where I got this damn cold.
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We start off with Roland getting more attention than he ever has in his entire life. Like honestly, I don’t know what Roland’s job really is...but he’s got a very diverse set of very useless skills. One of which, is knowing how to announce sports games that aren’t really a sport, while those games he’s announcing slowly fall into chaos.
Anyway, Roland’s taking so long cherishing his sweet time before everything goes to hell, that he’s boring Joey, who’s kinda turned into a ball of stress in the waiting room.
A lot of this episode is us watching them watching Joey having a break down moment by moment, TBH.
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(read more under the cut)
Yugi telling Joey to study his cards and straight up--what?
Like at this point they know what’s on the cards, right? Like there comes a point where even Yugioh cards have a finite amount of words and I’m just going to assume that like...Joey probably knows them all in his own deck, right?
(bro note: they have no limit on what they will put on a card)
Then again, maybe Yugi doesn’t know what “study” means?
Also, appreciate how some artist crosshatched the hell on Joey’s nose there and I zoomed out and ruined it.
Now for some reason every duelist is hanging out in the duel lodge, including our current arch-villain guy who’s brought a book. I want to know what book this guy even reads so no one could suspect he’s actually a hacker who uses computers. He’s reading romance, right? And I don’t think he’d even be into Twilight, I think he’s straight up into hard core Mom romance like a lame ass Nicholas Sparks over there reading “Dear John” for the millionth time because he is completely un-phased by anything else happening in this room.
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Joey, our hero, just out there being an asshole for no reason.
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After Tea is pushed into a locker or something screaming about her need for female friends (which she screamed in earshot of Rebecca again, who I figured was on friends terms with her after last episode...but I guess not) Leon hops up to remind us that we should be caring about the fact that his character exists.
And like, I love Leon’s hair color--that’s a good choice, and legit that is the color I tried to dye my hair at the beginning of the epidemic (it didn’t work PS, my hair cannot take dye for the life of it) but also like...he just kinda feels like a weak Rebecca as far as characters go. He’s young, he’s good at cards...I think he goes to a private school? That’s all I can think of about Leon.
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He mostly just reminds us that the big prize of this tourney is to duel Yugi, who anyone could have dueled at any point even without the tournament.
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On the way out of the...duel room? lounge? Area? Joey decides to like...make peace with Zigfried, and I gotta tell you, I kinda have to side with Zigfried, because Joey spent the last ten minutes being a freak in the dressing room/lounge/bathroom and at one point looked like he was going to hold the entire locker room in a stranglehold.
I would also want some space from Joey Wheeler, is what I’m saying.
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After insulting Joey’s style (which honestly, Joey...has a style? He pops his collar, that’s his entire style.) Zigfried assures us that Joey’s gonna lose and like...
...probably, right? Just looking at the plausible direction this season will go.
Anyway, Joey is such a mess (which is the theme of the episode, that Joey needs to learn to chill in order to win at card games) that Rebecca is like “I understand if all of you leave me to go help our poor baby Joey.” And no one felt bad for her.
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Mokuba comes over to tell everyone all of the Kaiba family secrets because Mokuba has no filter.
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Seto has devoted himself to staring at a computer screen for the rest of this episode. I guess he’ll put their names into Google, realize that social media hasn’t been invented yet, and then just lie his head down on the desk and take a power nap until the tournament is over. Much like I did after taking Dayquil this afternoon.
I like how Seto dressed for success and then locked himself in the server room for most of this arc so far. Maybe he’s just...really tired, I dunno. I don’t really blame the guy, he’s had a hard time.
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And then Yugi was like “DAMN IT MOKUBA, JUST ONCE CAN YOU NOT INVITE THE ILLUMINATI???”
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And we had a weird scene where Yugi just started talking to the ghost and it was while he was talking to everyone else, and the show didn’t treat it like that’s a weird thing to do...but it was a weird thing to do.
This show does that sometimes, where I guess they imply that Yugi’s Pharaoh conversations are split second conversations but...they’re not, right?
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Also this chick ain’t gone yet, and Mokuba is just failing at his entire job for not zeroing in on vibes coming off this chick like stinky cheeseman.
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So listen.
Did the Kaibas make like 3 types of Blue Eyes Caboose to one up Noah? Because Noah made one choo choo dragon, and then Mokuba and Seto were like “how dare” and then made sure that everyone ride every single version of the blue eyes caboose just to see how proud of them they were.
How many months of troubleshooting was the train? Like how long in development did Seto and Mokuba spend on these? A lot right? Like most of the time?
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I did not check the subs to see if Roland said Jumping or Champion but I like to believe that Roland thought it was a cool new name he gave him.
Then these guys all showed up.
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Hey so...can we talk seating arrangements?
Tea decided not to sit next to Yugi after complaining about not spending time with him for like how many episodes? Or was it too awkward to sit on top of what was probably Pharaoh?
Or did Mokuba go like “please, Tea, I cannot sit next to the others because I’m pretty sure one is a mole that is about to go cray” and was Tea like “Good, I need female friends, these ones are driving me crazy!” and then was Mokuba like peering desperately over the edge of his self made dragon train prison realizing he has to listen to Tea complain about boys for the rest of his ride across molten lava?
Headcanons abound about this weird seating arrangement that the animators drew for the reasons they did...but reasons I cannot fully understand. That and the Dayquil is making me overfixate on random stuff.
And also, Tea is kind of the Kaiba’s security’s understudy. Just there to always protect Mokuba with her ass because she’s the strongest woman alive.
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PS I missed the tumblr wars because at the time I was trying to like...run a proper business on blogger. When Blogger died and I jumped over here it was like a weird ruin where everyone was like “tumblr is the most toxic place alive” and...I’ve had a really nice time here, actually. Completely missed that civil war period and I have no regrets.
Now I was there for the Petz wars (warz, I guess) where people were very militant about Petz abuse (abuze?) where apparently people were using the spray bottle on their catz too much and people were very, very upset about it to the point that they were like campaigning about it on their angelfire websites with the most bizarre grassroots campaigns that I still recall, to this day because they were like...well they looked like this:
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PLAPA. Not only am I 100% positive that only this one guy ever called this movement PLAPA, but I’m 100% positive that not only are Catz not real people, but also this wasn’t actually happening and we never had any proof that it was. Either way, if people knew or suspected that you hadn’t deleted the spray bottle from your game (which at the time I had no idea how to do because I was a wee child) they would basically assume you were on a one way road to being a mass murderer in real life.
In real life we were 7 years old so like...thanks?
But that’s the closest I got to toxicity and at the time I was too young to make an email account and actually converse with these people. I was just there to download their Petz hexes, and I already made a post about how wonderful and incredible Petz Hexing was.
And y’all, I heard, just now after a little deep dive into the Petz Abuse debacle (which yes, is on the wiki), that apparently, like gardening, Petz Hexing came back in a big way during the epidemic--and I have found an active Petz forum in this the year 2021. The only problem is that I no longer remember how to use old timey forums...and I think I’m locked out of seeing most of these threads (and like this forum is so old I think I have to send them a letter in the physical mail to apply). But, I’m pretty sure they’re hosting a picture contest for who’s dogz poses the best. And I’m pretty sure someone created a hexxed Pickle Rick. Or it’s a photoshop that was made to look like a hexxed Pickle Rick.
Dammit why did it have to be Pickle Rick? That’s not worth re-installing Petz and getting it to run on Windows 10...
Guys is this the Dayquil? Is this really happening? I feel like I’m losing my mind for so many reasons...
Anyway, speaking about useless hexing it’s about time that our villain did something that was actually dangerous, so Zigfried decided to install a new virus that does more than turn off the lights. (it still turns off lights)
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the Spreadsheet Virus!
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Confounded by the spreadsheet software, it...um...it does this:
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Straight up how does Excel make a volcano erupt? Is that why I have to pay for Microsoft office now?
All this because Joey made fun of Zigfried’s naturally pink hair? Which is the most normal hair on this series outside of like...Tristan?
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Hey guys...Joey’s fine, right? Like how many times has Joey been on fire? And once in an iron cage next to like...a Fire Golem?
Joey’s fine.
MAN I miss Fire Golem. He had a good mug.
And then we just kinda watch chaos go across the park, chaos that includes: Too many ghosts in the haunted mansion (which honestly--you’ll get your money’s worth, sounds great!), the Ferris wheel goes kinda fast and thus might accidentally be fun, the lights turn off at some concert stage that only had 2 people on it (so it might just be motion detector lights and not even a virus), and um...literal fire and magma are going to set Joey Wheeler on fire.
Just...one of these events does not seem like the others. In fact most of these things sound like good improvements to the park and they should just hire Zigfried at this point.
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Roland puts down his microphone and jogs across the stage, about a mile through the audience bleachers, and into the staff lounge, to go and bother Seto Kaiba, who is in a room that has a hi-def classical painting copy-pasted on the wall and I can’t look away from it.
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I almost did a Google search on this painting but then thought better about it. There’s like...a billion classical paintings that look exactly like this, and they wouldn’t use like a Monet, they would have to do something that’s harder to catch to avoid copyright issues (because yes, even old ass paintings have copyright issues, but no one tell NFT’s which are going to be so freakin screwed and was such a bad idea, that I can’t even start).
Anyway, I have no idea who it is and it is legitimately driving me up a wall, but I’m on too much meds to do the effort of putting it in a reverse google image search.
Plus, a reverse google image search would only pull up Seto Kaiba.
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So Kaiba takes us on a little flashback to his weird ass past, a weird ass past that just...doesn’t follow any of the established timelines, but I assume was shortly after adoption but before Seto got into a phase where he wore his school outfit everywhere and tried to shove his MMO off onto his Dad as a business model.
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Seto is like 8 for some reason. I don’t know why, they kinda drew him younger this season anyway, like maybe they got a lot of fan mail and realized “Hey I think we made the 16 yo boy too sexy?” And they just toned Seto the hell down. That, and it’s a different animation team, and maybe they looked at Seto’s character design and were like “we don’t get paid enough to draw this well.” So...since Seto actually looks like a teen again, I guess his 12 year old self has to look like he’s in Elementary school.
Also, I only recognized this, because at some point in S3 as I was roasting Noah Kaiba’s weird fashion:
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I remember distinctly roasting that little bow tie. I don’t remember when I wrote it, I think there was a version of this outfit that was in color...but I don’t remember where.
Anyway, it’s not the same jacket...but man that’s kind of awkward, ya? Like the maid who dressed Mokuba deffo got fired?
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He um.
Turned the lights off a little bit.
Guys this villain is like...
...why does he think lights are scary? Like look at little Seto here. The boy is already bored. Seto duels on the edges of cliffs...he doesn’t care about the freakin dark.
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We had a guy who killed everyone on the planet last season, and this season we have a little fashion gremlin standing in the corner and flicking the light switch going  “wooooo you never catch me!” and it’s like...
...I’m starting to think this guy isn’t a witch.
Like we’re at Episode 6, there’s still time for this guy to be a witch...but I really am starting to think this guy is just...straight up not a witch. It’s everything Seto wanted, a rival who isn’t a freakin magic person...and sets Joey only fake on fire instead literally on fire like last time...
and Seto is just completely unhinged by it.
Anyway, I’m off to go drink a bowl of soup and pass out. If you’re new here, this is a link to read these in chrono order.
https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono
38 notes · View notes
bedtimebrain · 3 years
Text
EXO Baekhyun: Cry for Love Part 2
Just here to give a warning on the ending before you get started!! (ref to a/n in part 1!)
Part 1
Let’s go!!!
Characters: Baek x you
Baekhyun finds himself falling for you, but feels he cannot be so selfish to put the burdens of dating an idol upon you. In an attempt to control his feelings, he tries to stay away from you
That night they got to go home early. Reaching home close to 11, Baekhyun decided there was time for some computer games before sleeping.
After taking a shower, he quickly turned on his desktop, setting all his gaming gears ready. Realising his phone wasn’t with him, he went out to the living room to search for it.
‘Ah, found you!’
As he was about to head to his room after picking his phone up from the sofa, he caught sight of your gift that was sitting on the coffee table. 
He can’t help but feel really conflicted, taking a long look at it.
After a good while, he forcefully shook off those feelings and went back in to get started on his game instead.
‘ARGH! what a bad form today’ he took off his headphones and threw it on the table. Ruffling through his hair, he was so frustrated at himself. No matter how he tried, he just couldn’t keep you out of his mind.
Not having the mood to play anymore, he switched off his computer and crashed into bed.
--
In an attempt to push you out of his mind, he busied himself with work every single day for the next few weeks. Every free time he had, he decided to fill it up with more practice, more work instead.
But he had worked so hard (just to forget you) that his immune system gave up on him. He was eventually excused from work so he doesn’t spread the virus to the members.
And the worst thing of it all? It gave him ample time to think about you.
He thought about the way you smile, the way you listened to him when he shared about anything, the way you looked, so attractively, when you made your coffees. Did you think about him? Did another oppa come by?
Sighing, he got up from bed and decided finally to open the gift you gave him from a month back.
The following day, he woke up feeling much better.  But for the whole morning, he felt this annoying nudging inside of him to go see you. No matter what he did, that feeling just wouldn’t budge.
Did y/n put a spell in the tea she gave me or something. 
He was almost going mad from thinking about you. 
Giving up , he told himself 
Just once, I’m going to drive by and look at how she’s doing. That’s all. Then when I see her being all the same, I’ll finally forget all about this, and convince myself I’m just another customer in her daily life.
The journey to your cafe seemed faster than usual today. His heart was beating so rapidly but he kept telling himself over and over 
just once, doesn’t mean anything
and my heart’s just beating fast because im not completely recovered. Yep, sick people get exhausted easily. 
When he had reached , he park his car where he could get a good view of you. 
He was tempted to get out of his car but his mind was in chaos.
they say coffee helps with headache. Maybe I should get one in case I get a headache at home later right?
Then again, his logical self told him
Ya, Byun Baekhyun stop making up lame reasons. Just stay here.
As he was being wishy washy with himself in the car, a customer had arrived at the cafe. Dashing his hopes of having a private time with you.
Perhaps it was fate that he should admire you from his car today instead.
After getting a satisfactory treatment for his love sick heart, he drove away feeling like a small boy being fed with ice cream.
After that visit, it only got harder and harder to stay away. He returned again and again.
But he wasn’t the only one. 
There too was another man who kept returning to your cafe, and today was the fifth time he had seen the man, which really annoyed him.
But what position was he to do anything?
I’m telling myself that I cannot have her as my girlfriend but on the other hand im getting irritated she might become someone else’s girlfriend?
He thought of a crude but relatable phrase he heard from somewhere:
I’m really just wanting to ‘hog the toilet bowl without pooping’
His train of thoughts came to an end as he arrived at the company. After getting his car parked , he went to the meeting room where they were supposed to gather.
When all the members had arrived, the staff who was in charge of the album preparation started running through the day’s agenda.
‘Okay guys, we will be doing an additional MV for one of the side tracks. It would be an autumn special MV.
Since it’s an autumn concept, we will be mainly be doing outdoor shoots. There’s only 1 indoor shoot which will be at a cafe. Anyone has any questions ? If not we will start briefing on the storyboard’
Baekhyun wasn’t able to focus on the meeting. What was he supposed to you when he’s so drawn to you but yet wasn’t sacrificial enough either to be okay with seeing you happy with another guy. In fact, it made him scared to lose you when he never had you in the first place.
Baekhyun ah, let her go. It’s good for you and her. Stop visiting her, it only breaks your heart and at the same time make you desire her more. It’s impossible between the both of you..
By the time he was a little more settled with himself, the meeting had already ended.
‘Okay, that’s all we have today. It’s Thursday today... Alright, We will start shooting on Monday since this is quite a spontaneous idea, we might be a bit back on time. We will start with the cafe shoot on Monday at 10am, only Baekhyun and kyungsoo is involved for this as the cafe is too small. We will update the rest on the schedule later.’ --
4 days passed and now he is standing in front of the cafe for his shoot. Reading the signboard ‘Wendy Cafe’.
For the dramatic effect, he even blinked his eyes again to make sure his eyes weren’t playing tricks on him. What in the world was this sorcery called fate... It felt abit weird for him to be here for work when he was normally here for his romantic pursuit. It got him into a little of a panic and shock when they alighted from the van.  He wasn’t expecting to see you, since they normally made sure the set was cleared completely for set up before the members even arrive. Though his heart felt it would really be nice to see you, he also heaved a sigh of relief that he doesn’t have to think about what to say to you since you wouldn’t be here.
Entering the cafe, kyungsoo and baekhyun greeted everyone politely and got ready for the set with the help of their make up artists. 
‘Annyeonghasayo Baekhyun ssi, Kyungsoo ssi. I am the director for the MV, Lee Taemin’
Quickly getting up, they bowed politely and returned the greetings.
‘Could I just explain the set to the both you right now?
So basically in today’s set one of you would be a barista, and one would just be a customer….’
The director trailed on with the briefing,
But there was something bugging Baekhyun. Baekhyun could swear there was something really familiar about this man; like he had seen him somewhere before. But he just couldn’t recall exactly right now.
‘Ok, We will have kyungsoo ssi as the barista and Baekhyun ssi the latter. A real barista will be coming in later to help you out kyungsoo ssi, don’t worry’
Finishing his brief, the director turned to leave. Then it finally clicked in Baekhyun’s mind.
Oh gawd, he’s the guy that keeps visiting y/n
Thinking it through, it now absolutely make sense.
When he arrived, he was thinking how were they even able to find this cafe for use?
He thought to himself, surely you and Director Taemin must be really close if you were willing to let your shop to him for use. 
ah, but im sure y/n would let me use it too if i had asked.
He can’t help but feel a little salty instinctively. 
Suddenly across the room, the director exclaimed
‘Y/N you’re here!’
At the sound of Director Taemin calling your name, his heart skipped a beat and he immediately turned his head around to find you walking through the door. And was absolutely taken away
You were not in your pony tail or your white button down shirt with a black apron. You were not in the plain make up you normally put on either.
You came through the door wearing a mid length denim skirt and a white v neck with a green khaki coat that ended at the bottom of your skirt. Your long hair sat nicely at the front of your coat.
Though he had seen a fair share of cute, pretty and sexy girls in the entertainment industry, you somehow still took his breath away. 
As you moved across the room with Taemin, his eyes unconsciously followed where you went. Till when Kyungsoo shook him, was he finally able to tear his eyes away from you.
‘Baekhyun ah, I was talking to you , were you listening?’
‘Ye Ye, what did you say?’
They went on discussing about some of the other schedules they were to be having, until a familiar voice caused him to freeze.
‘Hello, I’m y/n, I’m the owner of this shop. I heard Kyungsoo ssi would be the barista actor? I’ll be the one teaching you later’
Kyungsoo looked up and greeted you politely while Baekhyun was still in a daze.
Seeing how he didn’t respond, you greeted him with a bright smile
‘Hello Baekhyun ssi’
Without waiting for Baekhyun to respond, you asked Kyungsoo to follow you to behind the kitchen now as there wasn’t much time to learn.
Watching you and kyungsoo walked away together, he mentally hit himself in the head. 
oh shucks she must think im a real jerk now. Making friends with her, then not coming here for months and the next time we meet i didn’t even greet her. 
Argh kyungsoo, give me my time with Y/N.
Though he was feeling a little lousy about the situation, he knew there was nothing he could do about it. He sat at corner table inside the shop while waiting for his scene set up to be completed.
Looking at you and kyungsoo, he had a monologue with himself 
though i really like her, i should probably let her go. the smile on her face, though i am confident i will be able to give it to her, but what if i bring more sadness than happiness?
The both of you having fun made him so jealous. He started imagining you with another guy, you with Taemin? He hated that feeling so much, but he had to accept this. He told himself, he must.
About 2 hours later , he was done with his shoot and all could break for lunch. Over lunch time, you and kyungsoo stuck together as time was tight. Kyungsoo couldnt practice using the coffee machine earlier when baekhyun was filming. 
Not once did you look over at him or even seem to think about talking with him. It was as if you guys were strangers.
Ah, great, this is how it should be like. She’s better than me at this. While i’m over here suffering about how to forget about her, she seem to be getting along just fine. She’s completely acting like she doesn’t know me.
Not being able to stand being around you anymore, he annoyed his manager hyung to drive him back to the SM building first. Coming up with some crap excuses that were questionable. But his manager hyung still sent him back since there was still time to spare before kyungsoo was done.
On his ride back, he set his resolve to let you go but he told himself 
no matter what, we were once friends that could count on each other. i don’t want to end up hurting her, and making her lose more hope in friendships. 
I’ll go back tonight to find her.
--
At about 5.30 pm, kyungsoo sent a text message in their group chat that the filming has ended. Receiving that intel, he got ready to head off to your café. The production crew would need at least another half an hour to pack up anyway. He had ample time to get there.
As perfect as he had planned, when he arrived, the café was already cleared of the production team, but the lights were still on. He knew you would still be cleaning up after everyone left.
Out of courtesy, he knocked on the glass door, causing you to jump in surprise instead. Smiling at him, you beckoned him in.
‘Why are you back here?’ You asked while sweeping the floor.
‘It’s been a long time, isn’t it nice to see each other again?’ He asked casually, but he could feel his palms sweating already
You looked up at him and smiled without replying as you continued cleaning up.
‘So how are you? I’m sorry I haven’t been here for really long, EXO’s comeback is coming soon we are really busy ….’
Before he could even complete his sentence, you cut him off
‘Yes I know. It’s all on twitter and I watch your group’s vlive too. I know you guys have a lot to prepare and are really busy. Don’t have to apologise’
Though he knew you truly meant what you say, it broke his heart a little. He wasn’t really sure what to say anymore. But he wanted to ask this since the start
‘Why did you rent your place to be an MV set? Did you know it was for EXO?’
‘It’s just a favour I’m returning to Taemin ssi. He only told me it was for EXO when he asked for my help last week. But anyway, it’s really nice to see you being serious at work. Now I know why you have so many fangirls~’
‘Are you my fangirl now then?’ Baekhyun asked and waited expectantly.
‘Why? Are you going to give me your autograph if I said yes?’ You put aside the cleaning cloth and washed your hands while replying him jokingly.
‘Anyway, I’m done, shall we go?’
You grabbed your bag as you asked. As you walked right passed him, he reached out to grab your arm without even thinking.
Hesitantly, he started
‘Hey actually, I came today because I have something to tell you’
Staring right into his eyes, you replied
‘I kinda knew it already. Why would you suddenly come back here after not being here for so long. And the fact that you’re here at this hour… You’re definitely not coming here as a customer right?’
Looking at him with a hard expression, Baekhyun was surprised to see something other than ‘manners’ or indifference on your face after all this while.
‘I’m really sorry. I don’t even know how or where to start. I really liked your company, the friendship we had meant a lot to me. But as we got more comfortable, I don’t even know when... but....to be honest..
I started falling for you. I didn’t know what to do, can you understand this?’
He loosened his grip, letting your arm slowly slip out of his hands.
‘Remember the day you gave me the gift? I went home feeling so conflicted. I want us to be together so bad, but I know I can’t even promise you a regular and peaceful life, much less a stable relationship now. The weight of dating an idol, how could I put that upon you? ‘
‘You’re right, I could never carry that weight’ you reply came through like a stab to his heart.
He broke his eyes away from you momentarily. But you continued,
‘All this while, I thought I had done something wrong when I gave you the gift. I wondered why you didn’t come back, I thought we were friends, that’s why I even mustered up courage to get a present for you. But you never came back after that. I thought could it be that Baekhyun ssi started finding me weird like all my bullies last time? Was I over doing it? I asked myself that every now and then, worried that my desire to want to be friends with you may turn you off instead.
Sometimes when you tell funny stories, inside I thought how cute this guy is. When you were serious, I thought even though you’re so cheeky on the outside, you’re a man inside having to carry so many burdens. I wanted to say more, do something for you all this time, but I was worried about so many things.
Eventually when you stopped coming back for a while, I felt heart broken. 
But I used the time to think it all through. What did I want with you? A friendship? Something more? And I decided it’s best to not desire anything at all. I could never handle it if one day I want something more that neither of us could give each other’ 
Though you tried so hard to control, tears rolled down your cheeks. It hurts him to know he was the reason for your tears. 
He reached out to wipe your tears away, and you let him. 
‘Baekhyun ssi, I… I’m sorry too’ 
Overwhelmed with emotions at all the confession and looking at your beautiful face that leaned against his hand, he couldn’t hold back anymore, He closed the gap between both of you and gave you a kiss on the lips. A kiss so light it barely lasted a few seconds.
Heart beating fast, he pulled away slightly, his face still so close to yours. ‘I’m sorry for being selfish right now. But I want you to know this is how I feel.’
Before he knew it, your lips pressed against him once again. Briefly, then pulling away, you pushed him away, putting some distance between the both of you.
‘Me too. But Baekhyun-ssi...
Sometimes love isn’t about possessing, but giving
So I’ve told myself it’s okay for me as long as I can see you and support you in my own way. Be it your albums, shows, or whatever it may be.
My café doors will always be open for you as long as you need a listening ear or even just coffee....
Don’t be sorry. I understand, I just want to be the safe space you can still go to, rather than your burden.. If we were together.’
He could tell you were trying hard to manage a smile just so he could feel better. He moved closer and pulled you into a hug. 
‘I know you said not to be sorry, but I’m sorry ... And thank you’, his voice akin to a whisper
After a long pause, you returned his hug, and at your touch, he was at the brink of tears. You were possibly his once in a lifetime, but here you both were, giving up on each other, for each other.  He tried so hard to hold back his tears, but they streamed down eventually 
He rarely ever cried, but for you… If he couldn’t have you, at least he should be allowed to cry for you. 
He tightened the hug and could only wish for the night to never end. 
——-
Was hella hard to write this, sorry for this really tragic ending.
But partly writing it this way because I guess as fangirls one of the best things we can give our favs is a safe space to be real with us. Love isn’t about possession. So let’s love them right ok☺️
On a side note, was shook at his fan sign convos. Especially the one he said though he said it’s ok if we leave him for a while because it’s difficult to wait, he didn’t actually mean it.
What a sweetheart!! All the more makes me feel like he might really respond this way if he is faced with this kind of situation (as in this fanfic)?!
Anw hope you guys enjoyed this !
Tag(s): @wooya1224
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one-boring-person · 3 years
Note
Hii long time no see!
Could you possibly write me an one-shot where the reader is having a anxiety attack because of quarantine (online school) and the boys help her trough it, and finish her schoolwork for her?
Hey! Thank you for requesting! I'm not the most knowledgeable on anxiety attacks, but I have first-hand experience of the stress of online education, so I've done my best!😊💛
Take A Break.
The Lost Boys x reader
Warnings: none
Masterlist
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It takes all I have not to throw my calculator into the wall as it shows me the same result it has been for the past half hour. The wrong result. 
My head has long since started pounding, my frustration rising as my brain brings up all the tasks I have yet to complete to the forefront of my mind, my heart wrenching at the thought of the amount of work still to do. A dull ache has set into my lower back, the pain being the result of hours of sitting in the same place, my eyes definitely strained from overuse, the constant staring at a screen having had significant impacts on me these past few weeks. The writing on the page swirls and blurs into a mess of symbols and letters, the diagrams too complicated for my tired mind to properly compute. 
Groaning in helpless frustration, I throw down my pen and drop the calculator to the floor, my head falling to rest on my arms as I bend over the desk, my eyes squeezed shut as I try not to think about the workload. It doesn't help, and my stress levels only climb steeply with each attempt at trying to get past the seemingly impossible wall of hopelessness. Normally, I'd be on top of all my work, I'd have free time and I'd feel a whole lot more relaxed. But that was before I spent all my days listening to my teachers drone on behind a screen, my eyelids drooping closed every five minutes, my focus diverted by some tiny distraction, eventually finding myself incapable of recalling the last ten minutes of classwork. Having terrible network problems don't help, either; most of the teachers are incredibly incompetent in regards to technology, and find the concept of using their computers for teaching unfeasible,�� allowing for hours and hours of disjointed lessons. 
With this in mind, the same teachers then set tonnes of homework, requiring it for the next day, creating truckloads of work for me, who already has enough on my plate as it is. I haven't even finished one piece of tonight's assignments, and there's four of them still to be done.
Tears form at the corners of my eyes at the reminder, my stress boiling over as I come to realise just how hopeless it really is for me to get this done in time. Ragged breaths leave me as I try to fight off the uncomfortable tightening in my chest, my head starting to spin, my hands clenching painfully on the table, the pen in my hand snapping from the force of my grip. Ignoring it, I simply keep my head in my arms as I prepare myself to continue.
The sudden weight of a hand on my shoulder jerks me from the safespace between my head and the desk, my body snapping around to face the newcomer. A sigh of relief escapes me as I catch sight of the four vampires arranged around my room, each of them watching me with concern. David stands over me, his gloved hand on my shoulder, blue eyes narrowed down at me.
"(Y/n)? What's wrong?" He questions quietly, rubbing his thumb over my skin gently.
"Nothing." I respond, collecting myself unsuccessfully, only realising there are wet streaks on my cheeks when the platinum blonde carefully catches a tear on the tip of his finger.
"This doesn't look like nothing. What happened?" He tries again, the boys each coming to stand around me, Paul latching himself onto my back somehow.
I regard them for a moment before replying.
"I'm just stressed. School is really taking its toll on me. I have a tonne of homework due for tomorrow, and if I don't get it done, I'll get marked down, and I still have to figure out how I'm gonna manage to sit an exam next week even though I can't do it in school. And I'm really struggling with content, too. I never understand what's going on because I get so distracted, and the lessons always break up anyway because the teachers don't know what they're doing. And I haven't left the house in days because of this stupid virus." I take a breath, stopping myself before I can ramble on, "I'm sorry, it just got a bit much."
The boys say nothing at first, exchanging a look before David is pulling me over to the bed, settling himself down on it with me lying between his legs, my back lying against his chest. Confused I go to get up again, only for Marko to plonk himself down on my legs, resting his head on my stomach, a cheeky grin on his angelic face.
"What are you doing? I have to get this work done!" I protest, wriggling until David wraps his arms around me, trapping my arms against me with a chuckle.
"Take a break, (Y/n). God knows you've earned it." He purrs to me as he gently kisses my neck, the action reassuring rather than intimate in this moment.
"But-"
"Hey, no "buts"." Paul smirks, dropping onto the bed with us, taking up one of my hands and starting to carefully run his fingers over it. Each movement is soothing, the sensation of his cold skin against mine serving to calm my racing nerves.
"You should get some sleep, (Y/n). School can wait for once." Dwayne chips in, joining the rest of us and copying Paul in his actions, rubbing his fingers over the bone structure of my hand.
Still unsure, I let myself relax a little, enjoying the comforting touches of the four doting vampires, glad to have a group of loving boyfriends ready to reassure me. Under their ministrations, I feel my eyelids start to droop, the tension slowly flowing from my body with each caress, my lethargic mind desperately needing the reprieve the boys are offering me. Gladly, I fall limp in David's arms, quickly allowing myself to drift off to sleep after days and days of receiving next to none.
Upon waking the next morning, I feel appropriately rested for once, my energy at a seemingly high level, the headache gone. Somewhat content, I slowly climb out of the bed and go to the desk, noticing its tidied state, as well as the neatly written note resting on my laptop.
"Why do all the work for yourself when there's four other people you could share with?"
Smiling, I then look to the side, where I notice all the homework from the night before sat, completed, the papers all piled neatly in one place. 
"They did it for me?" I mutter to myself, flicking through the sheaf of work, gratitude flooding me at the idea of being on top of all my work for once. I'd get more tonguth, but at least I wouldn't have to worry about the stuff from the night before.
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yuta-nakamots · 4 years
Text
Candle Light - l.hc ; Part 2 of 2 (End)
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Pairing - College!Haechan x Ghost!Reader
Genre - Fluff but mostly angst at the end
Warnings - Character death, supernatural activity (you are literally a ghost)
Summary - As the resident ghost that haunts your old apartment, you take pride in scaring away those who dare move in, not wanting them to ruin your memories. Though your mission changes after a group of boys arrive. These are the four boys you allow into your space and your heart. One of them is the candle that supports you, and you are the fire that burns atop it, his beacon of light.
Word Count - 6.2k
A/N - as always, credit goes to @soleilhyuck​ for coming up with the idea for this fic. thank you for patiently waiting and giving lots of love to this series and please look forward to frat boy!yuta next month as well <3
Tag List - @sunflowerhae @eunsangelical @soleilhyuck @neoyoungho @carefreebubble @sly-merlin @jisungismymom @jimelonji @lyraaacle @peachy-yabbay @yomanitsgonnabehee​
January 2020
News about the new virus was quickly spreading, as was the disease itself, unironically. You sat next to Renjun as he watched the news on TV and played a game on his phone while Jeno was lying on the floor in front of the coffee table as he typed out an essay on his laptop.
You watched as the newscaster stood in front of a graph showing the number of cases spiking up as he said “all local colleges will be migrating to an online schooling system for the second half of this year” to which Jeno let out a loud groan at.
“How the fuck am I supposed to do all my labs then?” he muttered under his breath, angrily hitting the carpeted floor. You laughed at his childish action, Jeno’s head whipping around as he looked in your general direction with his pupils shaking as he tried to find a face to match the voice he had just heard.
“Hey y/n, I think Jeno can hear you,” Renjun said nonchalantly as he continued watching the news station on TV, “okay, Jeno wait I think you should pay attention to the screen.”
He informed the other boy just in time as the anchor said “certain schools have disclosed that some students may still be required to return to campus for activities such as labs or other assessment events.”
Jeno rolled onto his back, letting out another groan that was almost actually a growl. “I don’t know which is worse. Having to go to school during a pandemic, or having to learn from my computer 24/7.”
February 2020
As more plans for the second semester were announced, Jeno did end up having to still visit the campus for his labs so he was occasionally out along with Jaemin who was volunteering at a hospital nearby, the same one your body was taken to after the incident, not that you’d ever tell them that though.
Jaemin had convinced Renjun to come along saying “we need extra help and it’s not like you’re doing anything anyways now that class is online” as he quite literally dragged Renjun out the front door.
This left you with Haechan, who was only able to see you in certain instances because he was still not totally sure if you really existed or not. He still used the scented candles in his room, much to your distaste, since you found yourself having to put out the flame nearly every night due to his forgetfulness.
He’d spend almost every waking moment on his computer playing Overwatch and whatever other games he was into, only stopping when we had to attend his mandatory online lectures. Even then, he’d still have the game up on his screen, barely even caring about the lecture.
Eventually, this irritated you enough, having been quite a good student yourself, to the point where you just lost it when you saw him pull up his school account and you peered over his shoulder and realizing how bad his grades really were.
“You shouldn’t do that, you know.” You spoke to him, hovering behind him as you read through the contents of his student profile.
Haechan froze for a second, surprised by your voice though he didn’t make an effort to turn around. “Well, you shouldn’t just scare people like that.” He retorted at you.
“Then don’t take your college life for granted,” you remark, not missing the high amount of absences he had even though all his courses were online, “I would’ve loved to have completed mine, but that just didn’t seem to be in my life plan now, was it?” You asked rhetorically, your voice laced with sarcasm to match his.
“What are you gonna do about it, huh?” He spat out at you. “You can’t force me to study.”
You rolled your eyes at him even if he couldn’t see you as you scoffed, “yes I can.” Quite literally, you moved through his desk and unplugged his computer from its power socket. A satisfactory grin fell upon your face as you heard his monitor die out and you look at him. His mouth was slightly agape as he finally saw you up close, your previously translucent figure becoming clearer and clearer to him with every second that passed.
From then on, Haechan consciously made an effort to cut back on his gaming and dedicate more time to his schoolwork, as he hated not knowing when you’d decide to pop into his room again and he didn’t want to risk more damage to his precious computer.
Sometimes he’d spend so much time studying that he’d even fall asleep at his desk, to which you could only sigh at as you fanned out the flames of his stupid scented candles that he continued to use before grabbing his blanket from his bed and placing it atop his shoulders.
March 2020
You found that you actually quite enjoyed spending time with Haechan as he was more entertaining and witty than Renjun. Though on a particularly slow afternoon, you watched Haechan as he went about making a sandwich in the kitchen, making yourself known to him by a light tug on his shirt before he asked “so why exactly do you haunt this apartment?”
You were leaning against the kitchen island behind him, not even having bothered to materialize in your semi-human form since you let him pick and choose when he wanted to see you or not. “If I’m being honest, I really don’t know. All I’m sure about is that this unit is my unit. It always has been and it always will be.”
“Well, what are your ties to this place? What does it mean to you?” He pressed on as he grabbed a slice of bologna from the refrigerator.
After pausing for a second as you recall your past, you told him “this is where I grew up, my parents moved here when I started elementary school and I’ve lived here for almost twenty years until I died and ever since then, I’ve just been here.”
“I’m sorry,” he interjected, looking at you and making eye contact to let you know he was being sincere, “I really am. You had so much to live for, your whole life ahead of you.” He shook his head in pity as he unwrapped a piece of cheese.
“Things don’t always go according to your plan, as you can see,” you stated before continuing on with your story, “anyways, my family moved out shortly after my incident because my sister would always cry whenever she had to pass the spot I was last alive at and eventually my parents couldn’t take it anymore so they just up and left.”
Haechan was unscrewing the lid of the jar of mayonnaise when he asked “why didn’t you stop them? Or did you try but they just weren’t able to see you?”
“They couldn’t see or hear me. I tried calling out to them, telling them I was still here, I was still alive, but nothing worked...and so they left me behind.” Your voice trailing off at the end as you felt a familiar pain in your chest at the memory of your family.
Haechan hummed in acknowledgment, spreading pieces of lettuce over the top of his sandwich, going silent before speaking again. “I think you need closure. Do you know where your family went to? I’m pretty sure we could--”
“No, I’d rather not talk to them.” You interrupted, not wanting to witness your family in pain again after having to watch them mourn your death in this very apartment. To them, you were a thing of the past and you wished to stay that way.
“You can’t just be cursed to wander around this unit for the rest of your life, or lack thereof. That’s a bit…” he paused as he wracked his brain for a word, turning up blank, “sad, for lack of a better word.”
You watched as he placed a slice of bread on top and pressed it down before biting into his creation. “It’s not like it was my choice in the first place, you know,” you strongly articulated, “if you really wanted to help me then you’d leave this place and let me wander in peace now that you know my story.”
“We both know damn well that you’re not gonna be happy if we leave you on your own.” And the most surprising part of his statement was that he was right.
April 2020
After your previous conversation with Haechan, the two of you started avoiding each other and you ended up spending more time with Jeno when he eventually came around to being able to see you. He was more of an easygoing presence and he didn’t mind it when you stayed in his room, he just asked that you “don’t mess with my stuff like when you stacked all my books up and turned my clothes inside out” the memory of it still makes you laugh to yourself.
You felt bad for Jeno, seeing him come home already exhausted from his labs and lectures, letting out a loud sigh whenever he entered through the front door as he was finally able to take off his face mask and allow himself to take a deep breath of air.
You’d often find him dozing off at his desk, his face resting either on his arm or on whatever page he had been going over. Sometimes, if you knew the assignment was important or if the deadline was near, you’d try to keep him awake by doing this like clicking his book or dropping a book on the floor. But if he was really knocked out, all you could do was just plug in his electronics to let them charge before bookmarking his page and clearing his desk for him.
On the night of his 20th birthday, the boys decided to have their own mini-party, which you excused yourself from. You didn’t want to get in the way of their celebration since you didn’t know for sure where you stood with Haechan and that’s on top of the fact that Jaemin still didn’t believe in your existence.
You stayed in Jeno’s room, softly plucking at the strings of his guitar which he had kindly left out for you. He had previously voiced his worries about you getting bored from always staying in the unit, which you found quite cute of him.
He came back to his room around midnight and you watched as he drunkenly made his way to the bathroom, stumbling in and nearly tripping over his own feet. You heard him throwing up into the toilet but you stayed put, knowing that you wouldn’t be of much help anyway. You recognized the sound of Haechan’s voice as he entered from his own side and tried to clean Jeno up.
Moments later, Haechan came into the room carrying a near unconscious Jeno to the bed you were currently sitting on. All Haechan had to do was merely glance at you before you were already materializing in human form to put Jeno’s guitar back on its stand and help Haechan get the birthday boy into bed.
Once Jeno was tucked in and snoring, you looked up at Haechan and he nodded his head in the direction of his room, inviting you to come over with him, which you did without much hesitation. You sat on the edge of his bed as he started up his computer as he asked you “don’t you ever get tired of just staying in the apartment all the time?”
You watched as he typed in his login information as you responded, “kind of, I guess. It’s all I know so it’s not like I really have anywhere else to go.”
“Have you ever tried leaving the building, or this unit at all?” He inquired while pulling up a page on google.
You thought for a moment before answering him. “No, I’ve never really wanted to leave because I’m comfortable here.”
Haechan simply nodded and stated “fair enough” as he switched tabs before turning to you. “I found this article the other day and I think this is relevant to you.” He informed, beckoning you over to him. You moved closer and read it from over his shoulder.
Certain spirits roam the earth as ghosts due to their souls holding onto the regret they had while they were still living. It is common for these types of ghosts to stay in a place that they have special emotional ties to. They often try to scare away people who enter their sacred place as they are trying to preserve it as it is in their memory, resisting change. There have been successful cases of exorcism for these types of ghosts, though oftentimes, it serves to only anger them further, which is why exorcism is not recommended. Edit: It has been found that the spirits often pass on to the true afterlife once they let go of the regrets they are holding and free themselves from the baggage that is tying them to their sacred place.
“Haechan, I already told you, I’m not leaving.”
“But think about it, you can’t just continue existing with one foot in the afterlife, one foot in the during-life,” causing you to laugh at his wording, “aren’t there other dead people you’d like to meet? You know, like Michael Jackson or something?”
“Of course, but how would you know if there really is an afterlife where I could meet them?”
“I don’t, but aren’t you getting tired of just watching people come and go? Aren’t you curious about the existence of an afterlife? You’ve been here for what, two years?”
“Three years.” You corrected, though he was correct about your boredom and curiosity even if it really was just in the slightest form.
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You weren’t looking forward to when the boys moved out as it meant you’d be left on your own again. You had grown used to the four of them since you had at least one of them home at nearly all times. You didn’t want them to leave and you had even though about asking them to stay, but you knew it would be unfair to them as they had previously talked about their future educational plans.
Renjun already was in the process of transferring to a school or arts to further hone his skills as he was nearing the completion of his traditional core credits. Jeno wanted to study abroad and experience different cultures while Jaemin simply would follow along, having promised both of their parents that he would look out for Jeno and make sure he didn’t overwork himself though oftentimes it was the other way around.
As finals came around again, you witnessed the boys and their ways of dealing with the stress of their exams. Renjun simply painted aggressively while Jeno started stretching and working out more often and Jaemin, who still wasn’t able to hear or see you, resorted to cooking. You couldn’t believe Haechan broke out those godforsaken candles yet again, even after you had voiced your hatred for them, having to put out their flames and clean up the dripping wax as to not cause a fire hazard.
One day, Jaemin was finally able to see a faint outline of your silhouette when you managed to catch the knife he had accidentally pushed off the counter while preparing dinner for the guys. He really didn’t believe them when they spoke of your existence, he simply thought it was some kind of odd prank they were all in on, but when he saw his knife floating mere centimeters above his foot, he realized they weren’t lying at all.
Ever since then, you’ve enjoyed hanging around with all four of the boys. They each introduced you to their hobbies and did their best at including you in as many activities as possible. Renjun was overjoyed when he saw you lift a brush from his case and when you asked if you could join him. He was painting a simple sunset and was more than happy to have your company. Renju let you paint any way you wished, only helping here and there to blend in your strokes and fix some of the color gradients.
After it dried, you stood back as he hung the canvas up in the living room with a broad smile on his face. He turned around and you watched as his expression morphed into one of confusion when he didn’t see you behind him and he called out your name. You felt a sense of anxiety creep up on you, reminiscent of the feeling of when your own family were not about to see you.
You knew Renjun had it easiest when it came to seeing and hearing you so why was he having a hard time now? “Oh, there you are.” He said, when you came into his view again, seemingly lightheartedly but it was hard for both of you to feel at ease after what just occurred.
It happened again when you were with Jeno as he was teaching you how to play a few chords on his guitar, something you had always wanted to do in your active lifetime. The two of you had been going at it for about an hour now and things were going pretty smoothly aside from Jeno having to help press the strings down when your own fingers weren’t enough.
You were able to learn a few simple chords separately but right before you were able to string them all together, the guitar suddenly fell through your hold into Jeno’s hands that were helping you apply pressure to the strings. He let out a noise of surprise as he too could no longer see your form.
He blinked rapidly, thinking it was his own eyes playing tricks on him until you saw him relax as both of you witnessed your own body flicker back into existence. This time, there was definitely no denying what just happened.
Later that night you went to Haechan and told him both accounts of what was going on and you broke down in tears, telling him how you didn’t want to leave them just yet. He rubbed your back as you clung on to his shirt, your tears would’ve been soaking it if you weren’t a ghost.
As much as you wanted to stay in his embrace, he told you that he had to study for an upcoming final so you instead settled for lying on his bed and staring up at the ceiling as you let your mind wander through all the what-ifs going through your head.
You’re not sure how much time passed before Haechan finally climbed into his bed, throwing an arm over your waist. No sooner than before he lifted his head to speak to you, his arm dropped through your body and fell onto his bed. The shock was evident on his face as he watched you fade out from his view.
Haechan frantically reached out, trying to grasp onto something, anything to tell him that you were still there as he called out your name. You did the same to him, but your cries fell on deaf ears until one of your hands managed to grab ahold of his and he found your eyes, the fear in his mirroring your own.
You laid with Haechan as he slept that night, scared that you’d cease to exist if he weren’t by your side to validate your presence every so often.
May 2, 2020
One night, as all of you were in the living room watching a show on Netflix, as per Renjun’s recommendation, you mentioned these repeated occurrences to them causing a thick silence to fall over everyone as they processed what this possibly meant for you.
Again, you sought out Haechan’s comfort that night and stayed by his side as he slept because being with him made you feel the slightest bit more real, even when his arm dropped from your waist again.
Now that finals week was over, the boys were home more often, though Jaemin still continued to work and volunteer at the hospital with Renjun, leaving you with Jeno and Haechan. Not much changed as you still continued to stick to Haechan like glue.
May 14, 2020
About two weeks after you had first brought up the topic of your frequency disappearances, you were lying next to Haechan in his bed as you both watched videos on his phone. He abruptly turned it off and turned to face you. “Have you ever been in a relationship before?”
You shook your head, “no, I was always too bust for one.”
“Did you want to be in one? Do you want to be in one?” You froze as you looked at him, not sure if he meant what you’re thinking he means. “On a scale from one to ten, how mad would you be right now if I told you I might have feelings for you?”
You thought for a moment before responding. “Depends on if you’re being serious or not.”
“I’m dead serious. Okay, maybe not dead, but you know what I mean.” He said, poking fun at his word choice.
“Do you really like me?” You asked, unsure if you were thinking clearly.
“Yes,” he paused, “but only if you like me back.”
“Is this just a spur of the moment thing or have you actually had feelings for me before this?” You could feel your cheeks heating up and you were suddenly grateful that he couldn’t see you as if you were a normal human.
“For a while now.” He stated, shrugging his shoulders as if it were nothing.
Your eyes grew wide in shock. “I...Haechan, as much as I’m flattered, we both know it’s not going to work out,” your voice getting caught in your throat, “you’re human, you’re still alive. There’s someone out there for you--”
“Okay and?”
“There’s someone who you can hold, someone you can kiss and make love to, someone you can have a family with--”
“And what if that someone is you?” He interrupted again. “What if you’re the someone I want to hold, to kiss, to spend time with?”
“Haechan...I don’t know…” Your voice coming out as more of a whisper.
His eyes searched yours as he spoke. “Just let me kiss you...please.”
You let out a small “okay” as your eyes fluttered shut and you felt his lips meet yours. He showed you the warmth you didn’t know you could even feel as you allowed yourself to melt into his kiss. Had it not been for your body disintegrating again and causing Haechan to fall forward, you probably would’ve stayed kissing him until he was begging for air.
“I guess that’s the universe telling me to give you a break for a bit.” He chuckled while he grabbed his phone and unpaused the video he was playing earlier as he waited for you to appear again. You didn’t have to look at him to know there was a smile plastered on his face as you wrapped your arms around him and nuzzled your face into his chest the very second you could.
If you were considered to be clingy with Haechan, now you were practically inseparable.
May 17, 2020
It was a rare occurrence for all four of them to be home together during the day so Jaemin took it as an opportunity to gather everyone for lunch. He didn’t even knock as he opened the door to Haechan’s room, sticking his head in to say “lunch is ready. I made kimchi stew. Oh, hey y/n, haven’t seen you in a while.”
You whined in embarrassment due to the fact that you were currently seated in Haechan’s lap as he practically held you like a baby, cooing at you and littering kisses across your face.
Once Jaemin was gone, Haechan pressed a kiss to your forehead. “You’re cute when you’re embarrassed. You know that?” He said, ruffling your hair out of affection.
May 19, 2020
You watch with great interest as Haechan lugs a box into his bedroom and cuts it open, revealing an electronic keyboard. He had told you previously that he wanted to get back into playing piano, having played it when he was younger. You didn’t think he was actually serious enough about it to buy a whole keyboard which, from the looks of it, seemed pretty expensive.
You sat in his gaming chair as you watched him assemble the stand, handing him scissors when he asked and holding things in place when his own two hands weren’t enough. You didn’t trust yourself to do much else in case you randomly disappeared again. Your lips curved upwards as he plugged the keyboard into the socket on the wall and played a few chords, his own smile matching yours.
May 20, 2020
Sighing, you floating your way into Haechan’s room as you notice his sleeping figure hunched over his desk, a little string of drool landing on the lined paper he was writing on. Given that school was already over, you figured it was song lyrics that he was writing.
Haechan, along with getting back into playing piano, had also picked up song composition and lyric writing as well though he refused to show you any of the lyrics he wrote and claimed he’d be embarrassed if you saw them to which you rolled your eyes at. Haechan? Embarrassed? Now that was a rarity given that he was one of the most confident people you’ve ever met, not even bothering to cover himself up the few times you accidentally came in while he was changing his clothes.
But as confident as he was, he had yet to channel that into his lyric writing as he kept falling asleep after hours of trying to get them perfect. You fan out the candle he had been using and run your finger across his lip, gathering his drool, in order to prevent his from further wetting his paper.
You tried to slowly pull the paper out from under his head, doing your best to not wake him up, though your efforts were in vain as his eyes shot open the second you tugged a little too hard. It took Haechan only a second or two to figure out what you were doing before he snatched the paper from you while whining “I told you not to read them” as he puts it in a folder filled with other papers which you assume are also lyrics.
“I was only moving it so you wouldn’t drool on it like a baby.” You scoffed at him.
Haechan imitated your scoff back at you, “don’t lie,” he quipped, “I know you were going to read it as soon as you got your hands on it.”
“You know, you better quit it or else you’re sleeping alone tonight.” You threatened, knowing that your boyfriend of sorts has gotten used to your presence in his bed while he slept.
“No!” He exclaimed, his eyes growing wide in panic before he dove for his bed and gave you puppy eyes, begging you not to leave him.
May 25, 2020
At this point, your disappearances had become more frequent and lasted for longer durations, leaving the boys constantly guessing as to where you were. You could barely muster up the force to show yourself in your human form and physically move objects so you were glad when you realized they could all see you in your regular blue-tinted ghost state.
You considered yourself lucky when they told you they could still feel the gusts of wind you created while moving around, even when you became invisible. It may look stupid to you when you were rapidly moving your arms back in forth to let them know where you are, but it’s not like you cared when you knew they couldn’t see you anyways.
On this day, you were watching a show on TV with Renjun, though he could only vaguely sense your presence. When you heard the sink in the kitchen turn on, you left your seat and floated through the wall to see if it was Jaemin cooking again. Much to your surprise, it was Haechan who was actually doing the dishes for once.
You moved around behind him, alerting him of your presence. “Hey babe, came to do the dishes with me?” You rolled your eyes and rapidly fanned his neck, something you knew he hated because he was ticklish in that area. “Okay, okay, I get it.” He giggled while scrunching his neck.
“Is y/n with you in the kitchen?” Renjun called out from the living room. Haechan shouted back a short ‘yes’ to which you heard Renjun respond back with a slight laugh in his voice, “I thought she was still with me so I was talking about the show but I guess I was just talking to myself this whole time.”
May 29, 2020
No matter how much energy you concentrated, you just couldn’t seem to show yourself in your human form at all. You weren’t completely invisible to the boys yet, just fading in and out of your normal ghost forme every so often, though if you really tried hard  enough, you could force yourself to become visible again, even if it were only for a few seconds. You saved your energy for more important moments like when Haechan shot up from his place next to you in bed, sweating from the nightmare he was having.
For the past half hour or so, you watched him as he writhed in his sleep and you felt your heart wrench knowing there was nothing you could do to rouse him from his sleep, unable to do your normal actions of slamming windows or dropping books so you felt a sense of relief when he jolted awake and looked over to where he knew you’d be, his eyes searching for the outline of your body to give him some comfort.
You forced yourself to show up, glowing faintly in the darkened room as Haechan was able to catch your silhouette before it disappeared again. His eyes bore straight into yours, even if you knew that to him, he was simply staring at a wall so you didn’t move, not wanting to leave his gaze as he spoke to you.
“Y/n, I hope you know that every moment I spend with you is precious to you. Whether I can see you or not, I know when you’re with me.” He confessed, his eyes starting to tear up. “I can only hope that I am making your last moments precious for you as well.”
You hoped so desperately to have enough strength to show yourself again to let him know that you heard him and felt the same way, but you were unable to. Your own wet eyes mirrored his as you reached out a hand to cup his face, a tear slipping out of your eyes as you watch your hand merely fall through his cheek.
June 2, 2020
You’ve come to terms with the fact that your time on earth is running out when you can only seem to manage to materialize once or twice a day, lasting for only about a second each time. You were upset that you didn’t get to say a true goodbye to the other three boys, wanting to thank them for taking such good care of you. Maybe you just so hoped that this regret would keep you with them longer, if only for a few more days.
June 4, 2020
When Haechan returns to his room after eating breakfast with the rest of the guys, you watch as he sits down in front of his keyboard before turning around to face his bed, where he’s guessing you were as he spoke. “Y/n, I wrote this song for you. I don’t know how much longer I have left with you so I rushed the ending of it, but I wanted to show you now before it’s too late.”
With that, he turned back around and began playing a melody you had heard from him before though it was different this time around now that he was singing the lyrics he wrote for you.
Like Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Moments with you are always special. I’m thankful for all the days we spend together, At times like this I get shy, but it means I love you. When I see you brightly smiling and dazzling, My wish of us being together forever seems like it’ll come true. I know the future isn’t clear and the past might be sad, But don’t worry anymore. Just keep adding days like this. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, I only have plans filled with you, I think it’s perfect. In my heart, my dreams were possible through you, I want to fulfill them all with you. I’m not alone, I’m with you, When I needed someone, you came to me. Even in the ordinary, I celebrate your preciousness, Please always stay by my side.
I want to give you gift-like days, you and me, me and you baby. Without leaving behind a single day, it’s only us. Like candlelight that never goes out, My wish of us being together forever seems like it’ll come true.
June 5, 2020
If you’re being completely honest with yourself, you’ve practically given up trying to make your whereabouts known to the boys, though they continued to speak to you as they estimated your location and if you were even present in the same room or not.
You wanted to tell Haechan how much you loved the song he wrote, but you were unable to. You wanted to do something for his birthday but you barely had enough strength to walk yourself from the balcony back into his room.
For the first time within the last four years of your existence, you felt tired. You had forgotten this feeling, what it was like to be tired and suddenly you remembered when all you wanted to do was lie down and sleep.
It was late already, the digital clock on Haechan’s desk reading 11:48pm as he stepped out from the bathroom, freshly showered. You eyed him, wanting to get up and kiss him all over, to give him the same love he gave to you, and you felt so helpless when you knew you wouldn’t be able to.
He lay down in his bed with his hair still slightly wet. “Can you believe it’s already been a whole year since we first moved in?” He turned his head, guessing at where your face was but returning his gaze to the ceiling to not make you feel bad before continuing on. “I never would’ve believed in ghosts if I hadn’t met you but now I’m always gonna think all ghosts are as sweet as you and that’s not good,” he said as he let out a laugh at the end, “I’m going to get myself killed if I try talking to a ghost that isn’t as kind and loving as you.”
Haechan went silent for a bit before continuing on. “But you would never let that happen right? You’ll be my angel watching down on me from above,” he paused as a sly smile appeared on his face, “or you’ll be my little demon waiting for me in hell.” He snicked to himself at his joke. “Ah, you’re probably trying to hit me right now. Don’t worry, I’ll do it myself.” And with that, he slapped his own cheek before telling you “I really love you and I hope you know that.”
June 6, 2020
As soon as the clock’s display changed to 12:00am, Haechan’s door burst open, revealing the other three boys with party hats atop their heads as they carried in a small cake with two candles on it, showing his new age of twenty. They began singing happy birthday and you even sang along with them, clapping your hands to the beat, even if they couldn’t hear you.
“Make a wish!” Renjun exclaimed once the song was over.
Haechan clasped his hands together as he closed his eyes for a few seconds. “Y/n, I know you’re still here. Before you go, please do this one last time for me.” He reopened his eyes and looked over at where he assumed you were and gestured towards the cake. You felt your heart swell with love as you took a final glance at him before using all your remaining energy to blow out the candle.
When the flame of the candle went out, so did your view of the world. Everything faded to black as your fire was extinguished, letting you rest in peace as Haechan’s candlelight.
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A/N - as always, credit goes to @soleilhyuck​ for coming up with the idea for this fic. thank you for patiently waiting and giving lots of love to this series and please look forward to frat boy!yuta next month as well <3
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Dark Snow {Maria Hill x Reader Oneshot}
Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 2919 Summary: You’ve been acting really weird after getting back from an undercover mission at HYDRA. Notes: Takes place during The Winter Soldier; Character Death
Maria loved to go through your wardrobe. While in hers hung her SHIELD uniforms, neatly and organized of course, and one or two cocktail dresses for when she needs to be undercover, yours was a little more chaotic. You were an agent as well, but kept your dresser full of comfortable clothing, which is what you preferred to spend your time in. Over-sized sweaters, sweatpants, baggy jeans, vintage band t-shirts, you hadn’t changed your style much since you were a teenager. And there was the added bonus that everything smelt like the bodywash that you used on yourself each night when you showered. She’s been wearing your clothes a lot more lately, since you’ve been away on a mission. She hadn’t heard a word from you in over a month. Only Nick Fury’s word that you were reported as still alive was all she had for comfort.
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As she curled up, watching something on Netflix that was going in one ear and out the other, she sniffed the sleeve of the sweater that she was wearing. It was yours from University, and had the name of it sprawled across the chest. She never thought she would wear this sweater, given that your schools were nemesis’s. In fact, it was at a school football game that you two had noticed one another. Sitting right across from one another, with the field between. You were wearing this very sweatshirt, rooting for your school’s team, being loud and proud about it. She had been dragged by a friend and wasn’t interested in what was going on at all. You caught eyes a couple of times throughout the game, and even ran into each other at the chip wagon when you both went to buy snacks. That was how everything started - over a cardboard container filled with fries.
You both ended up transferring to the Academy, which had been her idea at first. It had taken some convincing for you to apply, but you got in as soon as you did. She wasn’t ready to give you up. And a decade and a half later, she had no regrets about herself going to the Academy. But when you were off on a dangerous mission without being able to talk to anyone, she regretted getting you involved. She wouldn’t trade the years with you for anything, but she was greatly looking forward to when the both of you retired so she wouldn’t feel this worry anymore.
She was nearly falling asleep on the couch when there was a sound coming from the door of the apartment. With a smooth motion, Maria had the gun that she kept under the coffee table, holstered to the under side in case of emergencies. She clicked off the safety, and held it to her side. The door swung open, and she ducked down beside the couch, her head just poking over the top so she could see who it was that was approaching.
Once she saw that it was you, she put the safety back on and threw the gun onto the couch so she could run towards you with arms wide open. Her cheeks were flush with excitement, and before you could even brace yourself, she had embraced you in a tight hug. “I was so worried about you,” She said into your ear, breathing in, trying to get the familiar smell of you back on her. But you smelt different. Your body wash was still standing on the shower shelf, where it had been for the last month. You smelt like ... like nothing.
Even the hug that you returned, after getting your footing back, was lackluster. In vain, Maria tried to bring you in for a kiss, but you moved your head out of the way, avoiding her lips. “Give me a chance to put my bags down, at least,” You muttered. She slowly let go and you walked further into your residence, looking around. Maria hadn’t changed anything since you were last here, so she was a little confused at what you were looking at.
“I know you can’t tell me the details,” She said, using your rejection as an excuse to retreat into her work-like self. Straight and narrow. No room for emotions. You didn’t want to show her any affection, she would act like she had none left inside of her. “But can you at least tell me that you are okay? And if it was a success?”
“I’m fine, and it was a success,” You echoed. Maria clearly was not convinced, but said nothing more about it. You set your bags down next to the couch, and without another word, went into the bathroom, closing the door behind you. The sound of the shower starting up was heard over the sound effects from the movie that was still playing on the television.
Feeling dejected, Maria took off the sweatshirt that she was wearing, and tossed it into the laundry basket. She hoped that this was just you adjusting to being back home after being deeply undercover for Hydra for so long. But for now, she was very irritated and wanted nothing to do with your stupid sweater.
-
The next morning, nothing had changed. Nor did the next week. Or even the next few months. You still lived together, and you were pleasant enough, but there was no affection. You stayed up after Maria went to bed, and you were up and out by the time that she woke up. Only the rustled sheets gave any indication that you had come to the bed at all. She didn’t suspect an affair, which was the reason why most people stopped giving affection. Rather, she thought that something traumatizing had happened on your mission. You never spoke of it. Whenever she pestered you about it, you just told her that it was classified information, and she should know better than to go digging. After a little while, she gave up on asking you.
She attempted to get into the records, but they were sealed, which was very odd because she should have all of the clearance in the world given her position. But it locked her out when she tried. It even implemented a virus on the computer that she was using, and Stark had to be called in to help fix it. It felt shameful to even call him in, but at least you weren’t in the headquarters to notice.
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She soon grew distracted, as it became obvious that Hydra had infiltrated SHIELD. There had been an attack on Nick. She had to lie to everyone that he was dead. She even had to lie to you, which was a very hard thing to do. It was something she vowed that she would never do, but she found herself doing it anyway. Something in the back of her mind was telling her not to trust you with such sensitive information. She hoped it was just because it would put a target on your back if you knew, not because she thought you might use the information in a bad way.
You were spending more time out of the house as all of this was going on. As there was a war against Captain America. As someone called The Winter Soldier had come out of nowhere and tried to attack him. It kept Maria extremely busy, but even she was home more than you were.
And she was terrified.
Alexander Pierce was not working with her, having named Nick Fury a fugitive. But Pierce had kept you on, and you were spending a lot of time with him lately. Every time that she saw you, you were by his side or leaving one of his meetings. Something was going on. Something that you weren’t telling her.
She lost her faith in you, slowly but surely, and you weren’t even around for her to confront you about it. It went beyond the relationship, now. It was about loyalties. It was about life and death. She had sworn her life to SHIELD. She would die defending it, if needed. She no longer knew where your loyalties lied.
-
Project Insight was taking off. Romanoff and Fury were against Pierce. Rogers and Wilson were replacing the chips in the Hellicarriers, but it wasn’t coming along quickly due to the Winter Soldier’s involvement. Maria was in the safehouse, ready to take control and force the vessels to turn against one another. She was waiting on just one more, the last of the carriers. Her fingers were at the ready, prepared to program.
A click shocked her out of it. She immediately reached for the gun in her holster, and pointed it at the sound. Standing behind her, with a gun aimed at her, was you. “What are you doing. Y/N?”
“I’m afraid that I have to stop you from interfering further, Maria,” You said, completely calm despite the circumstances. Maria thought that she was going nuts. She knew you were growing distant, but she never thought you would turn against SHIELD.
“Answer my question. What are you doing?” She repeated, her hands trembling.
“What’s best for the world,” You said, with no emotion showing in your face. “Hail Hydra.”
Somehow, you missed. You were excellent with a gun, Maria knew that much from going to target practice together. The bullet whizzed past her shoulder and embedded itself in the wall. She managed to duck away from it, but it wasn’t hard for her to do so, since it would have passed by her anyway. Though it was close enough that she could smell the metal of it.
“That was a warning,” You said, blinking a few times at her, but didn’t shoot again. She aimed her gun at your chest. “I don’t want to have to kill you, Maria.”
“You -” She breathed, hair hanging her face. “- you joined Hydra? When? Why?”
“Those aren’t the important questions that you should be asking,” You said, taking a step towards the computer. She blocked you, still holding the gun in front of her. “What you should be asking is, what will SHIELD have to offer you now? And the answer is nothing. Because there is no more SHIELD. But there is, and always will be, Hydra.”
“You need to leave,” Maria said, her face hardening. She had to remember that this was part of her mission. Whatever they said to get you on board with Hydra must have been good, but she would not fall for it. She knew the dangers of the underground organization, and would fight them until her last breath. “Because I will complete this mission, and I will kill you if that is what it means.”
“I don’t think that you have it in you,” You said with a smirk. “I’m offering you a new life, Maria. With me - things can go back to the way that they were. But we won’t be on opposite sides anymore. We can be united together, under Hydra. The winning side.”
She let out a shaky breath, but did not move the aim of her weapon. She started to shake her head vigorously.
“Maybe it isn’t too late for us,” Maria pleaded. It felt like you weren’t even looking at her, but through her. Like you were so focused on the computer, that it didn’t actually matter whether you two got together or not. She had never known you to be so singularly-minded, especially with her around. “Come back with me. Pierce might be bringing the headquarters down, but SHIELD will always prevail. We can rebuild it from the ground up. Whatever you had a problem with-”
“I’m done with talking. You’re either with me, or you’re against me, Maria. What’s it going to be?” You questioned, gazing still at the computer. She let out a sigh this time, feeling her heart breaking in two.
“Against,” She said, startling you with a high kick that nearly knocked the gun out of your hand. You fumbled with it, but by the time you got it under control in your palm, she had fired off two shots. One had grazed the side of your head, while the second had gone straight to your hand.
Grimacing, you held your bad hand to your head where blood was starting to spurt. Only once you realized that you weren’t actually touching the wound did you realize that three of your fingers, your index, middle and ring - the same one that had your wedding band on it, still attached to a stub, were gone. You brought your hand down in shock and the ring slid off, bouncing off the ground with a metallic ringing.
“Now!” Steve shouted, and Maria turned back to the computer and input the code that would turn the hellicarrier against itself and finally be destroyed. The mission was complete, but at a cost.
A sharp pain went through Maria’s hip as she started to turn to face you. Never turn your back on an enemy, that was SHIELD 101. But the main mission had been important enough for her to do so, and she was paying for it now with a bullet embedded in her bone. It still didn’t clue into her mind that it was you who had shot her, and she went straight into defensive mode. As she started to fall to the ground in pain, she let off another shot, this one going into your chest. You fell back onto the hard ground, and you didn’t get back up again.
Weary, Maria fell onto the floor, landing on her ass harshly. She leaned her head back against the desk that the computer systems were on, and pressed a hand to where you had shot her, putting pressure on the wound. Nick would be back soon, she had to tell herself.
She shuffled over to where you were lying. Your chest was still rising and falling, proving that you were alive, but the puddle of blood beneath your body didn’t look good. It was thick, and dark, nearly black rather than red.
“Why, y/n? Why would you turn against us?” Maria asked, looking at your hand. The discarded fingers lay a couple of feet away, shot clean off. If you survived this, you wouldn’t be able to shoot again. At least, not without a fancy prosthetic, and since you have been labeled a traitor, it seemed unlikely you would get one.
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You coughed, blood coming out of your mouth. It wasn’t merely a shoulder shot. She had hit an artery. Despite the pain, you managed a smile, which made her heart started to beat faster.
“I’m so, so sorry,” You said, turning your head to try to look at her better. “I - Bucky -”
Maria’s fingers went to her mouth as you said the name. Bucky. Steve’s friend. The Winter Soldier. The name Dark Snow had come up as well in the records, before the virus was put in that locked Maria out. Everything was coming together.
“It wasn’t you, I know,” Maria said, moving some of the blood saturated hair out of your face. It was in large clumps due to the shot that had nicked your head, causing quite a bit of trauma to the skull. You were going to die, and Maria was half responsible. Hydra had the other half of the blame.
Taking some of the best soldiers and brainwashing them. It was brilliant. Horrific, but brilliant.
“I love you-” You said, snapping Maria back into the moment. She kept her hand on your cheek, comforting you as you passed from this world into the next. It was only a minute later that all of that light that she had loved so much disappeared from your sight, and you only had a blank stare left for the world.
-
When Steve, Sam, Natasha and Nick returned to the safe house, Maria was still in the same position. She was next to you, hand on your cooling cheek. She explained to them how she had come to the realization that you had been brain washed, like the Winter Soldier. Nick opened up about the mission that you had been on, though he himself only knew of a few details about it. Operation Dark Snow.
You were buried in a cemetery not too far from the football field where you two had met. Maria had you cremated, then your ashes interred into the ground, but not before she took a small amount of them, and had it wrapped in resin, which was then attached to a ring. She wore that ring every day, no matter if she was on a break, or if she was on a mission.
Knowing what HYDRA was capable of, and how they integrated themselves into high society like a parasite, did not bring fear into her heart. Instead, it bought anger. As long as she was working, she was pushing to make sure that no one else lost their love the way that she did.
She kept wearing your sweaters, curling up in them every night, feeling like they were a warm hug against the cold nights. Even the sweater of the opposing University.
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tisfan · 4 years
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Copied from Facebook; verified by a friend
From Joe Morice, daughters in 8th & 10th grade in Fairfax County Public Schools' Centreville Pyramid:
To our fellow FCPS families—this is it gang: 5 days until the 2 days in school vs. 100% virtual decision. Let’s talk it out, in my traditional mammoth TL/DR form.
Like all of you, I’ve seen my feed become a flood of anxiety and faux expertise. You’ll get no presumption of expertise here. This is how I am looking at and considering this issue and the positions people have taken in my feed and in the hundred or so FCPS discussion groups that have popped up. The lead comments in quotes are taken directly from my feed and those boards. Sometimes I try to rationalize them. Sometimes I’m just punching back at the void.
Full disclosure, we initially chose the 2 days option and are now having serious reservations. As I consider the positions and arguments I see in my feed, these are where my mind goes. Of note, when I started working on this piece at 12:19 PM today the COVID death tally in the United States stood at 133,420.
“My kids want to go back to school.”
I challenge that position. I believe what the kids desire is more abstract. I believe what they want is a return to normalcy. They want their idea of yesterday. And yesterday isn’t on the menu.
“I want my child in school so they can socialize.”
This was the principle reason for our 2 days decision. As I think more on it though, what do we think ‘social’ will look like? There aren’t going to be any lunch table groups, any lockers, any recess games, any study halls, any sitting next to friends, any talking to people in the hallway, any dances. All of that is off the menu. So, when we say that we want the kids to benefit from the social experience, what are we deluding ourselves into thinking in-building socialization will actually look like in the Fall?
“My kid is going to be left behind.”
Left behind who? The entire country is grappling with the same issue, leaving all children in the same quagmire. Who exactly would they be behind? I believe the rhetorical answer to that is “They’ll be behind where they should be,” to which I’ll counter that “where they should be” is a fictional goal post that we as a society have taken as gospel because it maps to standardized tests which are used to grade schools and counties as they chase funding.
“Classrooms are safe.”
At the current distancing guidelines from FCPS middle and high schools would have no more than 12 people (teachers + students) in a classroom (I acknowledge this number may change as FCPS considers the Commonwealth’s 3 ft with a mask vs. 6 ft position, noting that FCPS is all mask regardless of the distance). For the purpose of this discussion we’ll say classes run 45 minutes.
I posed the following question to 40 people today, representing professional and management roles in corporations, government agencies, and military commands: “Would your company or command have a 12 person, 45 minute meeting in a conference room?”
100% of them said no, they would not. These are some of their answers:
“No. Until further notice we are on Zoom.”
“(Our company) doesn’t allow us in (company space).”
“Oh hell no.”
“No absolutely not.”
“Is there a percentage lower than zero?”
“Something of that size would be virtual.”
We do not even consider putting our office employees into the same situation we are contemplating putting our children into. And let’s drive this point home: there are instances here when commanding officers will not put soldiers, ACTUAL SOLDIERS, into the kind of indoor environment we’re contemplating for our children. For me this is as close to a ‘kill shot’ argument as there is in this entire debate. How do we work from home because buildings with recycled air are not safe, because we don’t trust other people to not spread the virus, and then with the same breath send our children into buildings?
“Children only die .0016 of the time.”
First, conceding we’re an increasingly morally bankrupt society, but when did we start talking about children’s lives, or anyone’s lives, like this? This how the villain in movies talks about mortality, usually 10-15 minutes before the good guy kills him.
If you’re in this camp, and I acknowledge that many, many people are, I’m asking you to consider that number from a slightly different angle.
FCPS has 189,000 children. .0016 of that is 302. 302 dead children are the Calvary Hill you’re erecting your argument on. So, let’s agree to do this: stop presenting this as a data point. If this is your argument, I challenge you to have courage equal to your conviction. Go ahead, plant a flag on the internet and say, “Only 302 children will die.” No one will. That’s the kind action on social media that gets you fired from your job. And I trust our social media enclave isn’t so careless and irresponsible with life that it would even, for even a millisecond, enter any of your minds to make such an argument.
Considered another way: You’re presented with a bag with 189,000 $1 bills. You’re told that in the bag are 302 random bills, they look and feel just like all the others, but each one of those bills will kill you. Do you take the money out of the bag?
Same argument, applied to the 12,487 teachers in FCPS (per Wikipedia), using the ‘children’s multiplier’ of .0016 (all of us understanding the adult mortality rate is higher). That’s 20 teachers. That’s the number you’re talking about. It’s very easy to sit behind a keyboard and diminish and dismiss the risk you’re advocating other people assume. Take a breath and think about that.
If you want to advocate for 2 days a week, look, I’m looking for someone to convince me. But please, for the love of God, drop things like this from your argument. Because the people I know who’ve said things like this, I know they’re better people than this. They’re good people under incredible stress who let things slip out as their frustration boils over. So, please do the right thing and move on from this, because one potential outcome is that one day, you’re going to have to stand in front of St. Peter and answer for this, and that’s not going to be conversation you enjoy.
“Hardly any kids get COVID.”
(Deep sigh) Yes, that is statistically true as of this writing. But it is a cherry-picked argument because you’re leaving out an important piece.
One can reasonably argue that, due to the school closures in March, children have had the least EXPOSURE to COVID. In other words, closing schools was the one pandemic mitigation action we took that worked. There can be no discussion of the rate of diagnosis within children without also acknowledging they were among our fastest and most quarantined people. Put another way, you cannot cite the effect without acknowledging the cause.
“The flu kills more people every year.”
(Deep sigh). First of all, no, it doesn’t. Per the CDC, United States flu deaths average 20,000 annually. COVID, when I start writing here today, has killed 133,420 in six months.
And when you mention the flu, do you mean the disease that, if you’re suspected of having it, everyone, literally everyone in the country tells you stay the f- away from other people? You mean the one where parents are pretty sure their kids have it but send them to school anyway because they have a meeting that day, the one that every year causes massive f-ing outbreaks in schools because schools are petri dishes and it causes kids to miss weeks of school and leaves them out of sports and band for a month? That one? Because you’re right - the flu kills people every year. It does, but you’re ignoring the why. It’s because there are people who are a--holes who don’t care about infecting other people. In that regard it’s a perfect comparison to COVID.
“Almost everyone recovers.”
You’re confusing “release from the hospital” and “no longer infected” with “recovered.” I’m fortunate to only know two people who have had COVID. One my age and one my dad’s age. The one my age described it as “absolute hell” and although no longer infected cannot breathe right. The one my dad’s age was in the hospital for 13 weeks, had to have a trach ring put in because she could no longer be on a ventilator, and upon finally getting home and being faced with incalculable time in rehab told my mother, “I wish I had died.”
While I’m making every effort to reach objectivity, on this particular point, you don’t know what the f- you’re talking about.
“If people get sick, they get sick.”
First, you mistyped. What you intended to say was “If OTHER people get sick, they get sick.” And shame on you.
“I’m not going to live my life in fear.”
You already live your life in fear. For your health, your family’s health, your job, your retirement, terrorists, extremists, one political party or the other being in power, the new neighbors, an unexpected home repair, the next sunrise. What you meant to say was, “I’m not prepared to add ANOTHER fear,” and I’ve got news for you: that ship has sailed. It’s too late. There are two kinds of people, and only two: those that admit they’re afraid, and those that are lying to themselves about it.
As to the fear argument, fear is the reason you wait up when your kids stay out late, it’s the reason you tell your kids not to dive in the shallow water, to look both ways before crossing the road. Fear is the respect for the wide world that we teach our children. Except in this instance, for reasons no one has been able to explain to me yet.
“FCPS leadership sucks.”
I will summarize my view of the School Board thusly: if the 12 of you aren’t getting into a room together because it represents a risk, don’t tell me it’s OK for our kids. I understand your arguments, that we need the 2 days option for parents who can’t work from home, kids who don’t have internet or computer access, kids who needs meals from the school system, kids who need extra support to learn, and most tragically for kids who are at greater risk of abuse by being home. All very serious, all very real issues, all heartbreaking. No argument.
But you must first lead by example. Because you’re failing when it comes to optics. All your meetings are online. What our children see is all of you on a Zoom telling them it’s OK for them to be exactly where you aren’t. I understand you’re not PR people, but you really should think about hiring some.
“I talked it over with my kids.”
Let’s put aside for a moment the concept of adults effectively deferring this decision to children, the same children who will continue to stuff things into a full trash can rather than change it out. Yes, those hygienic children.
Listen, my 15 year old daughter wants a sport car, which she’s not getting next year because it would be dangerous to her and to others. Those kinds of decisions are our job. We step in and decide as parents, we don’t let them expose themselves to risks because their still developing and screen addicted brains narrow their understanding of cause and effect.
We as parents and adults serve to make difficult decisions. Sometimes those are in the form of lessons, where we try to steer kids towards the right answer and are willing to let them make a mistake in the hopes of teaching better decision making the next time around. This is not one of those moments. The stakes are too high for that. This is a “the adults are talking” moment. Kids are not mature enough for this moment. That is not an attack on your child. It is a broad statement about all children. It is true of your children and it was true when we were children. We need to be doing that thinking here, and “Johnny wants to see Bobby at school” cannot be the prevailing element in the equation.
“The teachers need to do their job.”
How is it that the same society which abruptly shifted to virtual students only three months ago, and offered glowing endorsements of teachers stating, “we finally understand how difficult your job is,” has now shifted to “screw you, do your job.” There are myriad problems with that position but for the purposes of this piece let’s simply go with, “You’re not looking for a teacher, you’re looking for the babysitter you feel your property tax payment entitles you to.”
“Teachers have a greater chance to being killed by a car than they do of dying from COVID.”
(Eye roll) Per the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (IIHS), the U.S. see approximately 36,000 auto fatalities a year. Again, there have been 133,420 COVID deaths in the United States through 12:09 July 10, 2020. So no, they do not have a great chance of being killed in a car accident.
And, if you want to take the actual environment into consideration, the odds of a teacher being killed in a car accident in their classroom, you know, the environment we’re actually talking about, that’s right around 0%.
“If the grocery store workers can be onsite what are the teachers afraid of?”
(Deep breath) A grocery store worker, who absolutely risks exposure, has either six feet of space or a plexiglass shield between them and individual adult customers who can grasp their own mortality whose transactions can be completed in moments, in a 40,000 SF space.
A teacher is with 11 ‘customers’ who have not an inkling what mortality is, for 45 minutes, in a 675 SF space, six times a day.
Just stop.
“Teachers are choosing remote because they don’t want to work.”
(Deep breaths) Many teachers are opting to be remote. That is not a vacation. They’re requesting to do their job at a safer site. Just like many, many people who work in buildings with recycled air have done. And likely the building you’re not going into has a newer and better serviced air system than our schools.
Of greater interest to me is the number of teachers choosing the 100% virtual option for their children. The people who spend the most time in the buildings are the same ones electing not to send their children into those buildings. That’s something I pay attention to.
“I wasn’t prepared to be a parent 24/7” and “I just need a break.”
I truly, deeply respect that honesty. Truth be told, both arguments have crossed my mind. Pre COVID, I routinely worked from home 1 – 2 days a week. The solace was nice. When I was in the office, I had an actual office, a room with a door I could close, where I could focus. During the quarantine that hasn’t always been the case. I’ve been frustrated, I’ve been short, I’ve gone to just take a drive and get the hell away for a moment and been disgusted when one of the kids sees me and asks me to come for a ride, robbing me of those minutes of silence. You want to hear silence. I get it. I really, really do.
Here’s another version of that, admittedly extreme. What if one of our kids becomes one of the 302? What’s that silence going to sound like? What if you have one of those matted frames where you add the kid’s school picture every year? What if you don’t get to finish the pictures?
“What does your gut tell you to do?”
Shawn and I have talked ad infinitum about all of these and other points. Two days ago, at mid-discussion I said, “Stop, right now, gut answer, what is it,” and we both said, “virtual.”
A lot of the arguments I hear people making for the 2 days sound like we’re trying to talk ourselves into ignoring our instincts, they are almost exclusively, “We’re doing 2 days, but…”. There’s a fantastic book by Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear, which I’ll minimize for you thusly: your gut instinct is a hardwired part of your brain and you should listen to it. In the introduction he talks about elevators, and how, of all living things, humans are the only ones that would voluntarily get into a soundproof steel box with a potential predator just so they could skip a flight of stairs.
I keep thinking that the 2 days option is the soundproof steel box. I welcome, damn, beg, anyone to convince me otherwise.
At the time I started writing at 12:09 PM, 133,420 Americans had died from COVID. Upon completing this draft at 7:04 PM, that number rose to 133,940.
520 Americans died of COVID while I was working on this. In seven hours.
The length of a school day.
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coyotestarcraft · 3 years
Text
TMNT - 2016 - Loss - Donnie x Loona(OC)
A/N: This is like a comfort thing I guess. Loona’s pronouns are he/him/his. My actual grandfather passed away on April 18, I used to call him papaw. The stuff like throwing up and having a panic attack I never actually did but I wanted to make this a bit dramatic because that’s just who I am, a dramatic person. Also Raph, Mikey, Leo, Splinter, April, Casey and Vern met my parents along with my grandfather.
Summary: Loona’s grandfather passed away a little over a month ago and is still getting over his death. Having no where to turn he goes to the lair to seek Donnie for comfort.
______________
Loona’s POV
I had gotten the most painful phone call from my mother in Florida, I heard my papaw had gotten the stupid covid virus and wasn’t going to survive.
“He passed away just a few minutes ago.” My mother cried on the other end.
“I-okay.” And hung up.
I collapsed to my knees and hunched over, my body was shaking with every sob that left my throat.
*Later That Night*
I sat in the same spot since the call, I hadn’t moved at all and my body was letting me know by all the aches in my joints from sitting in the same position for hours.
After another 5 minutes I decided to go see Donnie. I grabbed my jacket and a backpack with overnight clothes since I was gonna spend the night. I grabbed my phone and charger and headed out to find a manhole.
Once I found one, I looked around then lifted it up and climbed down.
I knew my way to the lair by heart so I didn’t take long to find. I walked in a saw Mikey and Raph watching tv.
“Hey dude! Glad you could join us this time a night!” Mikey smiles pulling me into a hug. It took everything in me not to break down. “Is Donnie in his lab? I need to talk with him.”
“Yeah, says he was coming to hang with you later but your already here so..” Mikey pointed to Don’s lab with his thumb.
“Thanks.” I mutter and walk over to the lab and open the door to see Donnie hard at work.
“Hey dove, I was about to head to your apartment but I got a little caught up in my work, sorry.”
“It’s fine.” I sigh and set my bag down.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Donnie sets down his tools, he looks at me with a concerning look.
“You remember my papaw?”
“Yeah, he was surpriseingly smart for his age. I think me and him had formed a good bond, I would love to see him again.” Donnie smiled.
That comment is was broke me, I broke down in tears and collapsed to my knees sobbing.
“He passed away today, around 2:30.” I cried.
I looked up to see Donnies eyes fill with tears, he let out a sob before coming to hug me.
“I’m so sorry baby, I had no idea. Did he pass away from old age or..?”
“The fucking covid virus.” I angrily cried. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye! You never got to say goodbye! I just want him back!” I yelled.
“I know baby, shh, shh, breathe.” Donnie cooed.
But I couldn’t and sent me into a panic attack. “P-panic, a-attack!” I heaved, Donnie quickly grabbed an empty bucked and put in underneath my mouth, I threw up, coughing and gasping for air.
“Shh, shh, I’m here sweetheart, take it easy.” Donnie rubber my back.
A few minutes pass and I’m in Donnies arms silently crying. I hadn’t even noticed Don’s brothers, including Splinter, April, and Casey all standing at the door for the whole duration of my panic attack. They were all worried and it showed, even Raph looked upset.
“Is everything alright my son?” Splinter asks Donnie.
“No, Loo, you have to tell them.” Donnie whispers to me.
I sit up in Donnies arms but don’t leave. “M-my papaw passed away this afternoon around 2:30 from covid.” I look up to see April in tears hugging Casey, Leo was silently letting tears fall down his cheeks along with Raph, and Mikey was sobbing in his hands.
“So that’s why you were yelling.” Leo said.
“Yeah.” I mutter.
The turtle brothers along with Splinter, April and Casey had grown to like my grandfather for the short duration he visited New York with my parents. And now them all hearing that he passed was devastating.
They all knew I was devastated the most.
*Timeskip*
I was in Donnies lap dozing off as he worked on his computer. “Sweetness?”
“Hmm?” I hummed.
“Are you hungry?”
“No.” I shake my head.
“Are you thirsty?” He asked.
“Yes.” I nod.
“Luckily I have a waterbottle, that has been unopened, ready for you.” He says as he carefully leans over to grab it as to not squish me against him.
“Thank you.” I whisper.
“Your welcome love, I’m here for you no matter what.” He softly kisses my head.
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
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fandom-necromancer · 3 years
Text
1737. I love you! No time to explain – gotta go.
This was prompted by the lovely @anxiousmessofaperson! I hope you enjoy!
Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900
‘Okay, so… For the fifth time today, let’s see what we got in terms of evidence…’, Gavin sighed, letting the compartments the five bodies were kept in slide open. ‘Five deviants ripped out vital components of themselves and were found dead in their home. Cause of death their missing component or fatal thirium loss before the missing component could cause it. Evidently ripped out by themselves.’ He saw the android next to him open his mouth and quickly added: ‘Although we can’t rule out that there is a group of five murderers of the same model took out the component, yes, I know.’ The android closed his mouth again. Nines’ face was completely emotionless, as always, but Gavin could swear he was pleased with himself. ‘We also know they had been sent a media file on their personal computers that destroyed itself and the device beyond recognition. Saved chips and uncovered data rule out a virus to have caused the behaviour as the network adapter was fried first upon receiving the file.’ Again, Nines was about to speak, but Gavin simply continued, knowing exactly what his partner would remind him of. This wasn’t the first time he spoke their gathered data out loud today hoping to find some clue that he missed. ‘Although a virus likely was the cause for the devices to be destroyed and we can’t rule out that the deviants interfaced with it.’ Nines nodded.
‘On top of that, none of the androids knew each other, they are different models, have no correlating hobbies, friends or family. Some are married, some are engaged or live together, some have been alone all their life. Android and human partners where there are partners. They work in different places with different income and live in completely different districts. No connection at all.’ He looked up to the faces of the five bodies. ‘How the hell are we supposed to solve this case?’
‘Two of them enjoyed visiting the same café’, Nines commented. ‘They serve thirium drinks there.’ ‘Not helping, Nines’, Gavin sighed, flipping through a few pictures from the crime-scene. ‘With how long it takes Detroit to adapt to its new citizen’s needs, I guess every android was to that café once.’ ‘It is most likely coincidence, I have to agree.’ ‘Urgh, unless we stumble upon the missing parts, I think this will be one of these cases that are never solved’, Gavin concluded with tired voice. ‘We can only hope no more androids have to die to this.’
‘We can do more’, Nines noted. ‘The missing parts vanish. If this was something personal, the murderer wouldn’t have cared to take them with them.’ ‘Unless they take trophies’, Gavin shrugged. ‘Thought about that too. But many human serial killers do stuff like this. Keep hearts in jars like some phcked up decoration or steal their stuff.’ ‘While that is a possibility, android parts can serve a better purpose. There is a market for spares.’ Gavin stopped swiping through pictures that wouldn’t tell him anything anyways. Instead he looked up at his partner. ‘And how should we find these five parts? If the murderer took them to sell them, then likely on the black market, not in official businesses. And I would guess they scratched the serial number from them, so we can’t ever tell whether or not it is from one of our dead androids.’
‘I would agree, but the AT100 here is an old model already. Before the revolution even started, they weren’t sold anymore. Spares are already scarce, but this specific part, biocomponent #1737y is designed to last a lifetime. There isn’t much stress on it as it is a system to extract any contamination from the thirium regulator filtering system. Normally it automatically cleans the filter and accumulates the contamination in a sealed chamber that breaks down its content. Realistically spoken it can’t break. But if taken out, the filter clogs and thirium flow stops. I found only three spare components available online from shady businesses and have already purchased one with police funds. The other two I will buy at set times next week and next month.’ Gavin stared at the android as if he had just plucked the moon from the sky to gift him. Nines of course continued: ‘Once we got everything we can try to find more clues on them.’ ‘And if we don’t find any, you got the sellers by the balls and we can interrogate them!’ Gavin grinned at the android excitedly. ‘God, that’s genius! We finally got this case going! I… I have to tell Tina! She had a similar case about a month back, maybe this will help her too. Oh, Nines, I love you!’ His partner frowned at him, but Gavin had already logged out and was on his way up. ‘No time to explain- gotta go!’
-
Nines detected a huge software instability as he stood in the evidence room and stared at the now empty stairs. What had this human just said? There surely had to be a misunderstanding. How did the Detective fall in love with him? He locked away their evidence and made his way up to the bullpen. He had to ask him about that. He let his eyes wander from person to person, but Gavin wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He had said he had something to talk about with Tina, but she was just sitting at her desk, reading something from her screen. Nines accessed the police network and blinked in confusion as he saw the man had already logged out for the day. There had only been half an hour to his shift, but Nines wouldn’t have thought him to just leave like that. Not after saying something like this.
His software instability rose further as he decided to leave the building and call an automated Taxi to the address Gavin had listed on his police file. He received a few warnings of unnecessary mission delays and actions taken that weren’t helping his mission, but he chalked it up as building up a better working relationship with his partner and an opportunity for more discussion as technically, Nines was still on the clock.
He rang the doorbell and was soon after met with a confused looking Gavin. ‘Toaster, what are you doing here?’ ‘Gavin, how did you fall in love with me? Why? I want answers.’ ‘Ah, shit, that’s why I left work early, I kinda-‘ ‘You didn’t mean it. You just blurted it out because of the excitement. I understand. Sorry for disturbing your evening, I will-‘ ‘Idiot, of course I mean it!’
Nines stared at the human, who was blushing a bright red by now. ‘Phck it, come in, can’t have this conversation on my damn porch.’ The android nodded and followed the invitation. Gavin closed the door and led him to a sofa nearby. ‘Okay, listen Nines, I did blurt it out because of the excitement and I sure as hell didn’t mean to say it, but I do mean it. I… We’ve worked together for months now and… Hell, I never planned it, but you really are someone I admire greatly. And I do… love you.’ ‘But I’m an android. A machine’, Nines reminded him confused by the human’s words. ‘Do you think I care about that?’, Gavin asked. ‘I did once, but you don’t need to be human to be a person. And you are- I never got to know someone who had more personality.’ Nines thought hard about it. ‘Gavin, I don’t have a personality. I am programmed.’ ‘Like hell you are! I have to admit, to really see it you have to understand a whole new set of hints, but once someone knows your language, they would be blind not to see who you are. I can’t say I completely deciphered yours, but you sure as hell deciphered mine. The only other person who put in the effort to do that was Tina.’ ‘Gavin. I… I don’t even emote.’ ‘Oh, you do. Whenever someone is talking bullshit and you try hard to contain yourself before correcting them you look away. Past the person you are talking to but not far enough away to be outright rude. You hate it when people interrupt you, only exception when they already caught your point and don’t want you to explain every little detail. You work hard and diligently. You look out for others. You would rather choose action than words. You care deeply for those around you.’
‘I’m still not deviant’, Nines whispered, realising there was no way he could make Gavin understand these were just personality assets installed in him. ‘Maybe not’, Gavin said. ‘But who in this world is really free? Very little people. As long as I know you want it too and agree on your own will, then I am content with it.’ ‘I can’t want anything. I’m not allowed to.’ ‘If I give you a choice - Yes or no – could you choose one?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Alright, then do you love me?’ Nines stayed silent for a while. ‘I would have to think about it. I like you a lot. Much more than anyone else. But I don’t know it it’s love.’ ‘Are you comfortable with me being in love with you?’ ‘Depending on what that entails’, Nines answered. ‘Pffff, I don’t know. Holding hands? Spending time together? Maybe going on dates? Kissing? If you want to of course. We can see how it goes from there.’ ‘Yes. Then I am comfortable with the idea.’ Gavin smiled at him. ‘Okay. You don’t have to be sure about every term just yet, there was a reason I wanted to wait for a bit…’
‘And you really don’t rather want a human?’, Nines asked. Gavin chuckled and answered: ‘Only if there was one exactly like you and I don’t think that’s possible.’ ‘That’s indeed highly improbable…’, the android muttered and looked down on Gavin’s hand on the cushions. Holding hands, spending time, dates, kissing, maybe more intimate acts in the future… He hesitantly reached out for Gavin’s fingers and gently took his hand in his. His software instability spiked, as the man squeezed him back.
‘I think according to this definition, I love you.’
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