#happy happy happy happy happy 20 Senne

[if-you-built-yourself-a-myth]

Check Ignition: Part III

That Sobbe fake-dating Hogwarts AU that one person asked for and I dove into headfirst

Part I // Part II // Part III // Part IV

Requests are open if you have any ideas of what I should write next

After the second night of Sander and Robbe’s arrangement, Robbe couldn’t eat dinner in the Great Hall for a week. A whole fucking week. He had Jens and Aaron sneaking sandwiches into the dormitory at dusk using cloaking and levitation spells. Lunch would have been an issue, too, if he hadn’t been spending those with Sander. Unfortunately, one meal a day together was the minimum for a convincing fake relationship.

“I can’t eat alone, can I?” Sander had asked when they met in the Great Hall after classes. “Boyfriends eat together.”

Robbe could do nothing but give in. They tried for dinner at first, and the following dissolved into lunch. Sander sat on the edge of the Hufflepuff bench, as if he were not welcome there, and held Robbe’s hand on top of the table while he ate whatever finger food he could and engaged in pleasant small-talk with Jens. He normally spent his evenings roaming the grounds.

Of course, that left Robbe and his friends at the table come dinnertime, watching Noor stare daggers at them. And that wasn’t cool. Britt’s ice-cold mannerisms at prefect meetings didn’t help, either, and only Senne could balance her out.

This month was going to feel a lot longer than Robbe imagined. If Sander didn’t find someone better.

Robbe was relieved when the weekend rolled around, because it brought with it Hufflepuff’s first game of the Quidditch season, against Ravenclaw. Jens made Robbe and Aaron run drills until one AM the night before. Peak physical condition was more important than sleep anyway.

Now, Robbe flew out over the pitch, one hand poised over his eyes to shade them from the sun. It took only a moment to spot the green and silver scarf in Hufflepuff’s black and yellow section, and Robbe knew that he didn’t really miss getting Great Hall dinners. So what if it was fake? There was Sander, in all his bleach-blond glory, sitting next to Senne in the stands and waving a black and yellow flag.

Sander locked eyes with Robbe and started screaming something incoherent over the wind. It was probably more about what people in the stands heard than what Robbe himself did, so Robbe soaked up the precious minute of Sander’s bright and happy face instead of paying attention to the message.

“Alright,” said Jens, gathering the other players closer for a pep talk. Robbe flew up a little higher to be level with the rest of the team. “Ravenclaw’s good. Great, even. But we’re better. Keep the Quaffle away from Zoë—she’s too fast and we’ll never see it again. Robbe, stop looking at your boyfriend.”

He wasn’t looking at Sander. He just so happened to be gazing the direction of the Hufflepuff stands.

The other team members muffled their laughter.

“Obviously, Yasmina,” Jens continued, unperturbed, “you are smarter and more capable than all of us. Please fix our mistakes.”

Yasmina played keeper. No one could protect a post like her, and the Ravenclaws knew it. There would be some faceoffs today. “Good pep talk,” she said.

“I try. Alright, I think that’s it. Let’s have an amazing match, no life-threatening injuries, no deaths. Go Hufflepuff!”

With that, the team shot apart to their differing positions on the pitch. Jens and the other chasers crowded the half line, Aaron and his fellow beater stayed back a little bit with bats poised, and Yasmina lounged sideways in front of the goal. Robbe decided to circle the game from above for a better perspective. The view reminded him of that from the astronomy tower. As play began, it was difficult to differentiate between teams swarming the pitch—a hurricane of bludgers and broomsticks. Robbe waited for the glare of the sun to highlight the golden snitch.

“Hello up there!” Yasmina called up to him, around five minutes in. Hufflepuff had pretty steady possession of the Quaffle. “See anything?”

“Not yet,” he shouted back. Ravenclaw’s seeker tarried by their set of goalposts. She hadn’t seen anything either.

“Is Sander really your boyfriend?” There was no judgement in her tone, yet somehow, Robbe felt it anyway. He curled into the defensive.

“Yes, and what of it?”

“Nothing. Just, Jana said so.”

“He’s gorgeous,” said Robbe, dropping twenty feet to do so.

“I didn’t know you were gay.”

“I’m not—”

The Quaffle almost made it through the smallest of Yasmina’s hoops, but she batted it away before it could cost a point. Jens grabbed her rebound and sped away down the side, passing back and forth with a fourth-year chaser they called Macs. Another minute, and a gong-like noise signaled a Hufflepuff score. They were leading thirty to zero.

“It’s great, really,” said Yasmina. “I’m happy for you.”

Robbe didn’t know what else to say, so he mumbled, “Thanks.”

From the corner of his eye, he saw Sander’s unmistakable bleach blond move around. He whirled to the action. Sander was talking with someone, a brunette girl, with animated hand gestures. For some reason, it made his head buzz.

Yasmina followed his line of vision. “Who’s she?”

No one Sander wasn’t allowed to talk to.

“A friend,” Robbe said smoothly. “Watch the game.”

Sander could chat with anyone he wanted. It didn’t mean anything more than Robbe’s fake relationship with him did. Yasmina had the good sense not to push it.

The game passed at an alarming speed, no time to perseverate on anything going on in the stands, no time for any more casual conversation. Jens was a blur with the Quaffle, dodging bludgers and ducking under other players. Zoë was never far behind. The teams would have been locked into a helpless tie if it were not for Yasmina’s stellar guard of the goal. By the halfway point, Hufflepuff was ahead ninety to thirty, and not one sign of the snitch. Robbe busied himself by weaving in and out of the towers around the pitch, because he enjoyed the way the Ravenclaw seeker followed him around like a lost child.

He hadn’t seen a thing, and look at her go! Maybe he would nosedive to watch her streak beside him, or launch into the atmosphere with her along for the ride.

A bludger knocked into the side of his broom. “Shit, sorry!” yelled Aaron from his spot beside Macs.

By some bizarre luck Robbe kept his hold, but the impact swiveled him back to face the Hufflepuff section of the stands, and he’d been avoiding that particular sight. He didn’t have time to turn away again. Sander stood out like a sore thumb. No, better comparison—Sander stood out like a sunflower in a field of poison ivy.

Cool it with the similes, Robbe. Focus.

The girl was still around. Sander was allowed to talk to girls as much as anyone else in the world. Robbe was upset, though, because it messed with the believability of their dating life. That was the reason.

He swooped directly over their heads, hand outstretched, as if they were all too blind to see the snitch a few feet in front of him. Where the gesture came from, who could say? Ravenclaw’s seeker didn’t hesitate to join.

“The skinny bloke over there is Robbe Ijzermans, finally doing something purposeful this match,” Luca’s voice boomed from the announcer’s box. Robbe didn’t know her that well; Aaron had a thing for her friend, Amber. “He’s spotted the snitch. Or he looks like he has. Toss-up. Oh, and lovely Zoë has the Quaffle again. Give them hell, girl—”

What the hell. Robbe was supposed to be dating Sander. Sander was crammed into the Hufflepuff section for him. Really, it would be suspicious if he didn’t do anything about this.

He angled his broom to spin back around and make a second pass over the Hufflepuff stands. This time, he got so close to Sander that he could ruffle Sander’s hair before zipping away. Let Luca talk about what that meant. The girl scooted away from Sander on the bench. She stared at the wooden slats beneath her feet, while Sander put his hands to his mouth and called something that Robbe couldn’t quite make out over the rush of blood in his ears.

Then, a glint!

By the announcer’s box, there it was! He could see its golden wings fluttering about. Normally, he tried to tune out Luca’s long-winded description of the game, but it was a little difficult when her microphone boomed in his ears as he shot out for the snitch.

“Looks like our Robbe has spotted it now. Wonder what that bullshit was earlier, then. Sorry, sorry I’ll stop cursing. Oh, fucking hell—”

Ravenclaw’s seeker came in close on Robbe’s side. She seemed to be following his movements; she couldn’t see the snitch about fifty feet away from her face. Robbe did have 20/20 vision. Maybe he was just better. It danced around in the air and across the stands, forcing them both to flip over in order to keep the pursuit.

“Macarthy with the Quaffle, he’s headed toward Ravenclaw goal. If I’m allowed to mention this, I don’t think Ingrid’s actually caught the snitch ever—right, sorry.”

The snitch closed its wings and dropped from the air until it was barely above the ground, where it reopened them to cut a trail across the worn grass. And here was Robbe, pretty close to the other Hufflepuffs, still.

This was a risky move, riskier than the hair ruffle. But it was pragmatic, Robbe reasoned, and it got him to the ground as quick as anything else. If he ever wanted to convince other people that his thing with Sander was something, it had to be more than sneaky kisses that didn’t really count for much. Plus, Ingrid didn’t actually see the snitch. So no harm done if he just—

Robbe let go.

The freefall was shorter than expected; he kept one hand wrapped around his broom as if he were on the monkey bars at the park back home. His feet met the wood of the stands with a bit of a bounce. Right next to Sander. Thank goodness, because there wouldn’t be time to move over if he landed by the wrong person. He conjured the memory from last week, when Sander kissed him for the first time, and did the same, but briefer and with less tongue. Tongue would be a little too much for a game. The crowd roared. He could see the snitch spinning in wide circles just above the ground. Ingrid halted overhead, confused, and darted toward the Slytherin tower.

“Another point for Ravenclaw over here and—what the fuck, Robbe?”

Robbe broke away before the kiss could take too long, and Sander leaned inward after him, as if he did not want it to end. Spectacular acting. Noor stood up from her seat three rows down, their eyes meeting for the shortest of seconds.

Before he could regret the whole thing, Robbe gathered up his last bit of courage and bounded down the stands on his feet instead of flying, making quite the jump at the end. He barely got his broom underneath him in time to evade a broken ankle on the pitch underneath the stands. Macs swerved to avoid him as his feet grazed the grass.

He coasted the rest of the chase on the adrenaline pumping through his veins and the absolute shock on Noor’s face. In no way did Sander’s cutting smile make him weak, no way.

“Guys and gals, take notes,” Luca declared. “Oh, and he’s got it, that son of a— Robbe has the snitch! Hufflepuff wins!”

***

Jens was on Robbe before he’d even dismounted his broom. “The fuck is with the grandstanding, huh?” he demanded. “You could have hurt somebody. You could have lost us the game. What the fuck?”

“Sorry, I was—” Robbe tore his gaze away at the sound of Sander’s voice coming down from the stands.

Sander caught him in a hug and brushed his lips along the edge of his ear, whispering, “How dramatic do you want this to be?” Skin peeled from his chapped lips and beads of sweat caught the light on his forehead. He was still a Greek god.

“I don’t know,” said Robbe, barely keeping his composure. “You can—”

He cut off as Sander scooped him up and spun him around in a circle. At its end, Sander lowered Robbe enough to draw him into a long, deep kiss. If Robbe could do wordless magic, every tree within a fifty-mile radius would have caught fire and burned to ash in a second.

He had to stop indulging thoughts like that. Noor stood by the entrance to the stands, and this was all for her. Just Sander helping him out.

“Gross,” said Aaron, patting Robbe on the back. “Get a room.”

“Gladly,” Sander said. “How long before Jens tries to get back to the dorms?”

“Oi!” Jens wasn’t done being angry with Robbe yet. “You’re not having sex on my bed!”

“Somebody has to, and you certainly aren’t.”

“Wow, okay. You’re not even—” Jens cut off. They’d promised to play along. “You’re new here, shut up.”

Sander accepted gracefully.

The other fans swarmed the players like flies and followed them on the way back to the dormitories, where Hufflepuff common room would likely host a killer party to celebrate the win. Robbe lost Sander in the fray almost immediately, even though their hands had been intertwined. He should let the group carry him along; he knew as much. Now that the game was over, though, there wasn’t any energy left for something like that. Robbe sat down on the pitch and leaned against the wooden supports of Hufflepuff’s box.

He wasn’t gay. He didn’t like Sander, not like that.

There must be loads of straight guys who felt good when they kissed other guys.

It didn’t mean anything. The whole relationship was fake.

Why wouldn’t his heart stop racing?

He breathed in until his lungs burned, held it for eight seconds, and exhaled until there was nothing left in his lungs. When that was done, things were calmer. More rational. His lips stung from the kisses.

This was not the time for a sexuality crisis. Tomorrow morning, maybe, or Tuesday afternoon.

The crowd’s cheers and banter faded off into the distance. The last straggling fans stumbled their way to the castle. It would be dusk soon, and the sunlight painted everything a delicious shade of gold. Robbe couldn’t help but fantasize: Sander in the sun like this, Sander’s eyes in the sun like this, Sander’s long eyelashes in the sun like this. He hated himself a little bit.

“Hey.”

Robbe looked up. Noor stood a few feet away, wearing a Hufflepuff sweater and a pair of sweatpants. The late November temperatures were no joke.

“Hello,” he replied.

“I thought you’d be upstairs.”

I thought you’d leave me alone, he thought. He said, “Catching my breath.”

“It’s a good night tonight. Lots of stars.”

“They’re around every night.”

“I guess.” She shifted awkwardly from foot to foot. “You haven’t been at dinner.”

“I’ve been studying,” said Robbe. “Exams in three weeks, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Robbe opened his mouth to tell her to spit it out, whatever she had to say. He was tired of talking to her. He needed her to disappear, even if it hurt, and fuck, he was a bad person after all.

“He’s going to get tired of you,” she said. It wasn’t harsh. It wasn’t even that sad. She said it like a fact. “He’s… he’s not right. He’s going to get bored and leave you.”

That caught him off-guard. “What?”

“Sander.” Noor bit her lip. “He and Britt are going to get back together. They always do.”

Robbe scoffed. “I don’t really care about Britt’s take on this, no offense.”

“It’s not hers. It’s mine. Sander’s going to get bored of you, and when he does, he’s going right back to her.”

The whole thing was fake. Sander wasn’t even with Robbe. How could Sander leave if they weren’t together? Nothing Noor said had any bearing on Robbe’s situation at all.

He repeated that to himself.

“Is that all you came out here to say?” he asked. Hopefully that sounded confident. Robbe was still a little out of breath from the game.

Noor nodded. “I just thought you should know. Don’t get too attached. Sander’s—”

“It’s not really your business,” said Jens. Oh thank goodness, there he was, behind Noor. He must have turned around when he realized Robbe wasn’t with him. Sander was at his shoulder. “C’mon, Robbe,” he said. “We’ve gotta get back. I think they’re popping champagne.”

Robbe pushed himself up using the wall as support. He wanted to hear the end of that last sentence, even if he never wanted to hear Noor speak again.

What he knew:

He didn’t consider himself to be a particularly interesting person, never had, and today was the most brazen he’d been in his entire life.

The arrangement was made to be thrown away as soon as someone better stepped onto to scene.

Sander already knew that he was boring—Robbe was a prefect, for fuck’s sake.

Noor hadn’t said anything that wasn’t aware of already.

For some reason, it still stung. They started off down the worn grass that led out of the stadium and in the direction of Hogwarts’ main building, and, very purposefully, Robbe slid his hand into Sander’s. Because he could.

“Sorry!” Noor called as they headed away. She really did sound it.

“What was that about?” came Sander’s whisper in Robbe’s ear. It sent shivers down his spine.

“Nothing,” he hissed back. “Don’t worry about it.”

He wouldn’t worry about it either.

#sobbe #sobbe fanfic #robbe ijzermans #sander driesen #hogwarts au #requested fic #fake dating #my writing #wtfock

[hopetofantasy]

Culture, parallels & meta - S3 E1

Previous season Prologue: Vlogs (1) - Vlogs (2)

°

Zaterdag 21:43

The time lapse already showing us a string of places that will be important later, like the dark alley, the Meir with Noor’s workplace, the university neighborhood, the Scheldt river where the boys hang out, ...

Perfect parallel: 

The second season starts Zoë’s POV with a (washing machine) door, whilst the third opens with a door to a party that Robbe attends.

Robbe glances back at Noor passing through the shot this episode, an action he repeats when he spots Sander in the second episode. - A very subtle hint to where his love life may lead.

The first one starts with two unknown LGBT+ girls kissing at a party, the last episode shows two known LGBT+ boys (Sobbe) kissing at their own party.

The aerial shot through the floor to introduce us to Robbe’s POV here and the aerial shot through the roof to say goodbye to him in the last episode.

Moyo saying “No one would do you” to Aaron in this episode, Aaron realizing “No one here wants to do me!” in the last.

Where’s Wally? Noor greeting Marie, accompanied by Jana and Britt. Max dancing with Keisha in the crowd.

How ‘meta’ of you: Newsflash, yes you are!

Nod to the OG: 

The deliberate messy POV: following everyone that we know already and then slowly settling on the Isak version in a tub.

Robbe saying Noor looks like ‘Natalie Portman’, which is what people said to the OG Emma when they flirted with her. Everyone, except Isak, that is.

Oop, there it is, the homophobia / heteronormativity: Moyo keeps pressuring Robbe into explaining what type of girl he likes. The boys laugh it off when he answers that ‘he doesn’t have a type’.

Lost in translation: Moyo mocks Noor’s Dutch accent, making his ‘g’ and ‘st’ sound harsher, while also adding ‘hoor’ at the end - a typical word used by the Dutch to emphasize a point.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Jens is playing with the weed bag. Keisha is one of the girls that Moyo mentions as Jens’ ex-girlfriend or ex-fling. Not only did Noor nót flush the toilet, but she didn’t used any toilet paper either!

°

Zaterdag 22:44

C is for culture: 

Noor rescuing Robbe on her scooter - In Belgium, you’re allowed to drive a moped or scooter once you’ve reached the age of 16. Nothing is needed if the vehicle doesn’t go above 25 km/h. If it stays between the range of 25-45 km/h and max. 50 cc, you need to pass a theoretical exam, 4 hours of driver’s ed and a practical exam to get the license. Anything other than that, has a whole new set of restrictions, types of driver’s licenses and minimum ages.  Noor and Robbe are, however, still breaking the law. As long as you’re not 18, you’re not allowed to have an extra passenger with you. Especially if they’re not wearing a helmet. (Plus they ignored a red light. Those rebels!)

“You do know that you always have to have it with you?” - The Belgian law states that everyone above age twelve, has to get an ID to identify themselves. Some might have had a Kids-ID already - for travel purposes - but that’s not mandatory. However, once you're fifteen years old, you’re obligated to carry your ID with you at all times.

Perfect parallel:

Luca being all jealous whilst staring at Noor and Robbe making out in S3, her glaring at Maud and Robbe every chance she got in the last season.

Robbe and Noor having fun on the scooter while screaming and Robbe filming their adventure in this episode. Robbe and Sander doing a similar thing, but on their bikes in a later episode.

Wink to other remakes: Robbe sporting a brown jacket. (Eliott, anyone?)

Surprise bitch, guess who: It’s Willem Chanterie, the on-set costume designer and social media production assistant!

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Noor has a ‘Fuck Trump’ sticker on her helmet. Robbe says “Hey, it’s red” in a very clear Antwerp accent. 

°

Zaterdag 23:11

Hello from the outside: The garbage truck they sprayed, still drove around the city regularly. The art piece itself is named ‘#Genoeg mama' (= ‘#Enough mommy’). It blames the consumer society as toxic, making young people its victim.

Oopsie: Inside the graffiti den, Noor suddenly sports a tote bag with supplies, even though we never saw her wearing that in the previous shots.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Noor has black combat boots. The photographer is obviously Sander, in case you have missed that subtle clue.

°

Zondag 13:41

Lost in translation/Oop, there it is, the homophobia / heteronormativity: 

“Check die pekie’s”. The word ‘pekie’ is actually Amsterdam slang for ‘beautiful girl, girlfriend’. In recent years, more and more Dutch slang are making their way into the Flemish dialect, because of the Dutch rap songs gaining popularity with the youngsters.

“Vamos, flikkers”. The word ‘flikkers’ can mean ‘wussie’ as well as a derogatory term for ‘homosexual’. Again establishing the fact that the boys use a lot of homophobic or toxic words for each other.

Robbe’s clumsiness meter: +1, him tossing the bag behind Jens instead of into his hands.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: There is a football right next to the skateboards.

°

Maandag 16:04

C is for culture: “The whole art school was talking about it” - 

Secondary school is divided in four sections: general, technical, art and vocational. Which section you choose can have effect on further education. In one of these sections, you pick what you want to study from your first to last year (‘directions’). That means that you have some courses purely focused on the direction and others that are obligated for everyone, regardless.

Art high schoolers can choose to go to work or study a specialization afterwards. Their coursework isn’t solely art based, there are general required courses too. That’s why some foreigners - including the Dutch - come to Belgium, since they’ll get a more rounded and higher level of art education than in their countries. ‘de!KUNSTHUMANIORA’ is the high school in Antwerp Noor goes to and is known for having students with unique styles.

Perfect parallel: 

Noor waiting outside the school for Robbe and him reacting somewhat confused here, Sander doing the same and having an instantly happy Robbe in a later episode.

Robbe having no problem kissing a girl ‘as a straight guy’ in front of the gates in this episode and scared for what might happen if he kissed a boy ‘as a gay guy’ later on. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: The insta caption underneath the art work says ‘An inspirational message on a Sunday! Just discovered this in Antwerp city today. Artist unknown... Can you remember when you last called on your mother?’ (That last sentence, oooofff, the symbolism!)

°

Dinsdag 14:57

C is for culture: 

“Yes, mini enterprises are so chill.” - Mini enterprises are often used as a tool for Economics in the fifth/sixth year. The goal of these is to ‘learn whilst doing it’. Like the name specifies, mini enterprises are actual miniature companies set up by a group of students. During the school year, they’ll try to work together on commercializing a product. All aspects of entrepreneurship are at play here: writing a business plan, holding meetings, doing bookkeeping, marketing the product, produce and sell it, ... If the enterprise idea is good or well executed, it might even win a national prize by the company making this education formula.

“What if he contacts child protection services” - Actually, those services doesn’t really exist in Belgium. There are, however, other youth organizations for these types of things, like JAC - Youth Advice Centre, CLB - Centre for Student Guidance and the Centre for Mental Healthcare.

Perfect parallel: The boys hyping Aaron up to walk over to Amber and talk to her - yet he fails in this episode, them doing the same and he succeeds (after some fails) in the last episode. 

Oop, there it is, the homophobia / heteronormativity: Jens saying “Damn, seems like someone is on his fucking period”, after Robbe snaps at him due to the difficult telephone call with his dad.

Lost in translation: Jens saying “Mijn kop staat er niet naar” (= “My head’s not standing there”) can actually mean different things: I’m not in the mood, it’s not the right time, I don't want to do it, my head’s all over the place, ... It depends on the context, on which interpretation would suit the situation the best. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: The girls are all fawning all over Britt’s cellphone, so there is a good chance that they’re discussing (pictures of) her boyfriend, Sander. Also, Jana’s braces are gone! 

°

Donderdag 17:13

Perfect parallel: Robbe stating that he can’t talk to his dad or he’ll fight and Zoë getting that, as she said a similar thing to an understanding Senne about her parents in S2. 

How ‘meta’ of you: Ah, yes, fandom ship names in SKAM. We applaud!

Oopsie: If you look really hard, you see that the body type and hair of Robbe’s dad, doesn’t correspond with the version waiting at the restaurant later on.

Wink to other remakes: This shot reminding you of a certain S3 trailer?  👀

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: The numerous references to Zoënne’s relationship in their room (relationship pics, Senne’s guitar). The paper Milan gifts to Robbe is the written permission by his parent to live with them, as is obligated by law.

°

Vrijdag 20:04

Perfect parallel: 

Senne pulling Zoë up after a kiss here, just like with their first kiss in S2.

Robbe pushing Milan away after thinking he wanted to kiss him at the party in S2, them hugging it out in after talking about it in S3.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Zoë and Milan making some healthy party snacks like cauliflower and cocktail sauce, cheese with tomatoes and salami squares. She pulls back the bottle of gin that Milan wants to steal. Senne also bought paprika and tortilla chips from Colruyt (a discount store).

°

Vrijdag 20:54

C is for culture: “Noor, Robbe’s girlfriend” - (Teen) dating culture is different in Belgium. Usually, if you have kissed, hung out, texted or just said/did something to show your mutual interest, you’d pretty much consider yourself in a relationship. It can go from 0 to 100 very quick. Unless there is, of course, an agreement that what you’re doing is no such thing. Also, nobody really ask you to be their gf/bf. It just implied or stated to their family or friends. 

Perfect parallel: 

A reluctant Robbe pushing himself to do stuff to Noor (playful dancing, kissing, riling her up) as far as putting his hands on her bra here. A totally different, excited Robbe not even thinking twice about doing these things to Sander, even licking his nipple during their reunion.

Noor pushing Robbe on the bed and climbing over him, whilst Robbe looks all sad in this episode. Him pushing Sander on the bed and being happy as Sander crawls over him during their reunion.

Oop, there it is, the homophobia / heteronormativity: Robbe tries to convince himself into liking heterosexual sex with Noor and fake laughs with his friends about having it.

Where’s Wally? Keisha laughing with Amber and later dancing with Marie.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Jens is talking to Senne. The decorations behind Milan saying ‘Welkom Robbe’ (= ‘Welcome Robbe’). Noor has a beautiful tattoo of a pin-up girl covered with butterflies on her lower arm.

#wtfock #wtfam #skam #skam belgium #cpm rewatch

[indimlights]

I like to think that in this moment Robbe and Sander are still sleeping tucked in each others arms not giving a damn about the fact it's already 11:15 because they have each others arms and that's all they'll ever need to be cozy and warm in this cold fall morning.

Robbe is slowly opening his sleepy eyes because of the soft mumbling and laughter that is coming from the kitchen where all the others are having breakfast that Zoë prepared for them. The ambient is cheerfull like there are no worries in the world. Everyone is having the time of their lifes and getting ready for a new day.

Robbe slowly turns to his left, gently so he doesn't wake up the only person that he cares for at that moment. He stops when hes face to face to the most beautiful boy he ever saw in his life. Sanders face while sleeping is the greatest thing Robbe laid his eyes on. It was a previlege to be able to witness it often and Robbe knows how lucky he is.

He could stare at Sander sleeping all day but the noise from the kitchen is ingraving in his mind as a "get up" warning. Before he does it he just takes another quick look at Sander, whose arms are wrapped around him. He just smiles when he sees him like this, vulnerable, fragile in hes sleep but still incredibly beautiful. Sander was always beautiful to Robbe, whatever it is he was doing.

He decides to get up so he starts to carefully remove Sanders arms from his chest. The only thing he cares for is to not wake him up, even if he takes 20 minutes to get up. After he gets up he checks if his boyfriend is still sleeping, he is. As hes walking towards the door he is interrupted by a low raspy voice that echoes through the silent room.

"Are you going to leave me behind?" Sander is awake, eyes slowly opening while the words leaves his lips. As soon as he sees Robbe he just smiles, like he just saw the biggest ray of sunshine in a cold morning. That was his reaction everytime he saw Robbe. He was a ray of sunshine, his ray of sunshine.

"No, not in this universe" Robbe smiled as he said it. They had shared those words before but in a different context. The previous time Sander was insecure, afraid to be alone and Robbe was reassuring him he was there but now...now it was clear Sander was saying it with a smile on his face, as if he was just commenting on Robbes idea to go to the kitchen alone and let him sleep. That showed how much they had evolved as a couple, now knowing they would be there for each other for everything, every happy moment and every hard moment the world brings against them

"So...you coming?" Robbe adds as he gently smiles to Sander

Sander smiles back, sleepy puffy eyes that make him even more beautiful to Robbe. He gets up and starts walking to his boyfriend, getting close enough to press a quick kiss on his lips, smiling as wide as Robbe was when he saw him sleep. He sofly nodds his head answering to Robbes question and grabbing his hand slowly kissing it.

They leave the room, hand in hand, confident enough to know they will always be there for each other and that's the only thing that matters for them. For both of them.

"Hey guys you are awake, come join us." Zoës voice is now what echoes through the hallway and room, a now empty room where the heat of two hearts in love fought all the cold from that cold morning. Laughs are heard in the distance, now not only Zoë, Senne, Aaron, Amber, Moyo, Jens and Luca but also Robbe and Sander who joined them. Together. As they always will be.

#wtfock #my writing attempts #cause why not #my wtfock fictional moments

[corkcitylibraries]

Murder and forbidden love: The Price of Salt and the life of Patricia Highsmith

by Deirdre Swain

2021 marks the hundredth anniversary of the birth of Patricia Highsmith, a fascinating lesbian author. She is the author of The Talented Mr. Ripley and is best known as a mystery and crime novelist. Her second novel The Price of Salt was groundbreaking and unique at the time of its publication in 1952. It is considered to be the first lesbian novel with a happy ending where neither female protagonists end up having a nervous breakdown, dying tragically, facing a hopeless future, committing suicide or settling for a relationship with a man. Earlier lesbian novels, examples of which include The Well of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall and Spring Fire by Marijane Meaker, were required to end in tragedy so that the authorities would not censor them for being obscene.

Patricia Highsmith had an unhappy childhood. She was born in Fort Worth in Texas on 19 January 1921, but she moved around a lot between Texas and New York as a child. She hated her stepfather, Stanley, and by the age of eight, she regularly fantasised about killing him. When she started spending time with her father, Jay Bernard Plangman at the age of 17, she seemed to have a rather incestuous relationship with him. Highsmith describes 1933-34 as the saddest year of her life. This was when her mother told the young Highsmith she was going to divorce Stanley, and both daughter and mother moved from New York back to Texas. However, her mother then left her in Texas with her grandparents and returned to Stanley in New York, leaving Patricia broken-hearted. As a teenager, she felt rejected by her mother who wanted her to “be like other people” and would not accept her as a lesbian. Between the ages of 15 and 19, she suffered from anorexia.

Highsmith was very intelligent and excelled in school. At just age 9 or 10, she started reading psychology books and was fascinated by Dr. Karl Menninger’s The Human Mind. This was when her interest in abnormal psychology was piqued. Her enthusiasm for this subject, as well as the fact that as a child, she felt a great sense of guilt for some unknown reason, had a considerable influence on her writing. She created characters who were driven by the absence or presence of guilt.

As an adult, Highsmith’s sexual relationships were predominantly with women, although she was briefly engaged to a man, Marc Brandel, whom she never married.

Highsmith’s second novel The Price of Salt was published in 1952. After her first novel Strangers on a Train was published, she had been labelled a mystery writer, and she did not want to be known as a lesbian novelist. The decision was therefore taken to publish The Price of Salt under the pseudonym Claire Morgan. The first edition of The Price of Salt was a Bantam Books paperback edition, and the gaudy novel cover was in the style of a “lesbian pulp fiction” novel. Lesbian pulp book covers often presented lesbian relationships as dangerous and questioned whether lesbians could be seen as women. The blurb on the front cover describes Highsmith’s story as “the novel of a love society forbids”, and the New York Times endorses it, stating that it “[handles] explosive material… with sincerity and good taste”.

Highsmith had initially written an unhappy, tragic ending to the novel, but after seeing an alternative, more positive ending that Highsmith had written, her agent persuaded her to use the more optimistic version. Carol is essentially a love story between two women from very different worlds and social classes. It concerns 19-year-old Therese Belivet, a vulnerable and lonely aspiring set designer who is unsure of herself and the direction of her life. She is dating a man named Richard, whom she neither loves nor enjoys being with. Therese has a temporary Christmas job in the toy section of a large department store, which she finds uninspiring and dull. Her life is transformed one day when a customer, an older and alluring woman named Carol Aird, catches her attention. Carol is a sophisticated, wealthy woman in her thirties who is going through a difficult divorce. She buys a toy from Therese for her daughter. Mesmerised by this revelatory encounter, Therese cannot forget Carol, and, having received her address for the purchase, she sends her a department store Christmas card. On receiving the card, Carol arranges to meet Therese. What begins as an unlikely and tentative friendship becomes a forbidden love affair between the two. Carol has been in relationships with women before, but it is Therese’s first time being in one and experiencing the passion of a fulfilling relationship. Unfortunately, this type of romance is by its very definition dangerous. Same-sex couples are viewed as indecent and abhorrent by society. The novel explores the impossibility of a relationship which is both prohibited by society and utterly irresistible.

Patricia Highsmith took inspiration from a real-life event in her own life for this story. In December 1948, she herself was working in the toy department of Bloomingdale’s when an elegant blonde-haired woman wearing a mink coat walked into the shop and bought a doll from Highsmith. Although the chance meeting only lasted a couple of minutes, it was a very significant encounter for the author. When she went home that night, she wrote the plot of the book, The Price of Salt. A few days after coming across the striking woman who had made such an impression on her, Highsmith became ill with chickenpox. She presumed one of the children in the toy department had transmitted the disease to her, but she did not see it as a negative thing. She asserted that the child had passed to her “the germ of a book too: fever is stimulating to the imagination”. However, the story does not end there. Highsmith was in possession of the customer’s address for the purchase delivery. She could not forget this fascinating and intriguing woman, whose name was Kathleen Senn. In the summer of 1950, Highsmith took a train from Pennsylvania Station to New Jersey to the road where Senn lived. She wanted to find Senn and spy on her. As she got closer to Senn’s house, she felt guilty and almost turned back. She saw her in a car passing by. Her description of her feelings in her journal that day are rather disturbing. She describes how “murder is a kind of making love”, and that while she daydreamed about kissing Senn, she also fantasised about strangling her. Highsmith never actually spoke to Senn after seeing her in the department store, but her experience of meeting her and the intensity of the feelings the encounter evoked in her became the basis for the novel, The Price of Salt.

The Bantam 25-cent paperback first edition of The Price of Salt sold over one million copies. There was a huge response to the novel from lesbians around America, and it transformed many people’s lives. She received between 10 and 15 letters twice a week for months after the book’s publication. One letter which particularly touched her was from a woman in a small town who, until she read The Price of Salt, believed she was the only woman in the world who was attracted to other women. The novel was republished as Carol under Highsmith’s real name in 1990.

Patricia Highsmith died on 4 February 1995, 20 years before her book Carol was released as a film, changing people’s lives even still. She only wrote one lesbian novel, and it was an extremely brave undertaking at the time of its publication. The Price of Salt, or Carol, is a classic of lesbian literature.

References

-Highsmith, Patricia (2010). Carol. London: Bloomsbury.

-Wilson, Andrew (2010). Beautiful Shadow: A life of Patricia Highsmith. London: Bloomsbury.

#corkcitylibraries #LoveReading #sharetherainbow #LGBTIAwarenessWeek

[hopelessromanticvirgo]

Ground Control To Us

Sobbe social media au 3.8

Chapter 3.7

When Senne walked upstairs to their apartment, he was a little surprised to find it locked since Sander never locks it when he's waiting for Senne, just because he gets too lazy to get up and open it, and he knows Sander must be at home.

If he isn't, that means they are going to have problems.

Senne takes his keys out of his gym bag's pocket and opens it. He walks in slowly and quietly, puts his bag down on the floor and goes to the kitchen to drink water and wash his hands. (The bathroom is close to their bedrooms and he doesn't want to let Sander know he's at home before he goes in his room, but the boy probably already knows.)

After a few minutes, he gathers up his courage, gets ready to see his friend in the situation he is in which won't be the first or last time for Senne. He has been there to help Sander out a lot of times and no matter how many times Sander tells him he's fine by himself and how he hates to be a burden for Senne, he always makes him shut up and does whatever he can to help, and sometimes all he can do is to just be there with him, and wait, so he does exactly that. He walked to Sander's bedroom slowly and knocked but no answer came which made him sigh and cracked it open just to see a lump of a body wrapped in blankets in a burning August, looking like a stone, on the bed, not moving. "Hey." He started softly, walking up to him. He didn't dare to sit down beside him yet, he know he had to get an "approval" for that. "Your mom called me. She's worried about you. It would be good if you answered your phone, just for a few minutes. And if it gets too overwhelming you can shut it off again, alright?" The silence was very loud in the room, with Senne standing over him, looking hopeless and upset and Sander staying still, having no reaction to the things Senne was saying to him. But he know the boy was listening, so he waited and when Sander moved a little bit to make a room for Senne on the edge of a bed, the brunet smiled and sat down.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Such a cheesy thing to say and Senne knew it was a right one. He always has to chose his words carefully while his friend is like this, he needs to be joking and be playful, needs to make the air around them a little lighter.

Again, no answer came so Senne added : "Will you tell me what you're thinking?"

It was such a small movement that if Senne hasn't been staring at half of Sander's face which was visible from the blanket, he'd miss it, the way he nodded his head up and down.

It made Senne happy.

"Okay then. Start when you're ready."

Senne was getting too flustered by looking at the blankets, it was extremely hot to even wear clothes and he was wrapped in them, pretty tightly too.

When he lost his hope for getting an answer Sander started mumbling.

"I messed up."

What a great start.

"Don't you want to give me more information? Is this about the boy you like?"

Senne knows, of course he does. It's pretty obvious the way Sander just dropped after staring at his phone screen for 20 minutes before he said something about "I can't take it anymore. I have to read them."

Senne didn't ask any questions, he respected when Sander said that it wasn't his job to say anything, but now, looking at him in this place, like this, he didn't care whatever and whoever's privacy he was breaking.

When still not a single word was said, he realized that it would be harder to get the boy open up, than he thought.

"Hey buddy. You know I don't have all day. I'm a busy guy." He joked and that must have done the trick because for the first time since he walked in, Sander looked up to him and finally put the blanket down from his nose and mouth.

"I did something, I shouldn't have." His voice was already breaking from the emotions he was feeling. A few wrong sentence and he'd be having a breakdown.

"What did you do?" Senne tried to ask this as calmly as he could, so the boy wouldn't get an impression that his friend was mad or upset with him.

He could see how the boy was hesitant but after a while he gave up his fight in his head, which was telling him to stay silent and deal with this all by his self and told him everything that happened, from the beginning, every little detail.

He didn't include all the things he read but said enough for Senne to understand what a mess he created and got his self into.

The brunet was quiet. When he suggested a video idea, he'd never thought that they would be having this conversation but the life has a weird way of working so he shouldn't be even surprised.

"Should I dare and ask if you have anything planned out, how you want this to continue?"

The face Sander made was a clear clue that he had no idea what he was going to do.

His usual plan wad always "ignore the problem until it goes away," but both of them knew that doing this right now was impossible.

"Can I ask you questions?"

Senne asked as softly as he could and when Sander nodded his head again weakly, he started.

"He doesn't know its you he's talking to, right?"

"No." Just one word, holding so much meaning and pain in itself.

"Are you going to tell him?"

He tried not to think about what his friend must be feeling right now and tried to get his whole mind and attention on finding some kind of solution from this situation.

"I can't." Senne could see Sander, staring at the blank spot on the wall, his eyes getting wet and he looked away as fast as he could. He needed to think without his heart now for both of their sake.

"Why? Don't you think it will be more faithful for him to know?"

Whatever Sander'd decide, it was obvious that one day he had to tell him and the later it would happen, more hurtful it would be.

"If I tell him, he's gonna hate me." A painful whisper empowered everything Senne was going to say but then he rolled his eyes and wanted to make the boy see, how wrong he was but he tried to control his self.

"Sander, from the things you've told me, I'm pretty positive that you can't do anything to make him hate you."

The way that boy was talking about Sander, like he was his only hope in humanity, his only friend and solace was something people don't just say if they don't mean it. Sander was too upset to see that. It seems a little scary and creepy at first too, Senne can't seem to ignore that fact but after you think about it, it's not that weird. And he already knows if their relationship somehow continues, they will be both such a good influence on each other and Sander deserved somebody who loved him that deeply, who tried to understand his every move and word, who'd do anything to make him proud and happy, who would be his biggest support and passionate about what he does for a living and for fun. If there was a person in this whole fucked up world, who deserved love more than ever, it was Sander. "No. He will. I can feel it." Senne shook his head but of course, Sander couldn't see it, he was too gone and his eyes were too dazed to fully realize that was happening but at least he was talking. "He worships the ground you walk on. I don't think this will make him change his mind. Yeah, maybe he will be kind of upset about it but - " "He won't talk to me again. He will think that I was just messing around with him, that I used him and made him say all of this for my ego, and when those weren't enough I stalked his account to read his deepest and darkest secrets that he couldn't even admit to his self. And even if he forgave me, I'd never live up to his expectations of me. He likes me now because he doesn't know me. I'll just break him and Senne, he's already so broken. I can't bring any more harm to him. He doesn't deserve this."

He doesn't deserve me, Sander wanted to say but stoped his self when he realized how wrong it sounded. It was Sander who didn't deserve Robbe. Robbe deserves so much more than what Sander could offer. Robbe didn't deserve Sander's problems. He'd only hurt him more no matter how much he'd try to do the opposite. He already hurt him and he hasn't even meet him, imagine what he can do to him if they will continue their whatever relationship they have, Sander would damage the boy and he can't bring his self to do that for his own happiness, no matter how much he wants nothing more that coming out clean and being with him.

This true and raw confession caught Senne off guard and made him shut his lips but after he processed all of this in his mind, he found a loop hole and wanted to use it immediately.

"So, it seems to me that you've already giving up, before even anything started and you are making this choice for both of you, and let me tell you, that's not fair. You don't have any power to decide things for him. And even if you are right about everything you said, which you aren't, what would you do now? So you're just gonna forget him?

Don't you want to know him better, or was all this searching for him for absolutely no reason. Are you going to move on without telling him anything like nothing happened? Wouldn't that hurt him as well? And the most importantly, do you want to do that, Sander?"

Before this, Sander only had to disagree with a sad and broken voice but hearing this, he quickly sat up and his voice got stronger and higher with the each word he spoke up.

"Why can't you understand. There is nothing I can do. If I tell him it's me, he's gonna hate me forever and if I don't tell him, that means I'm gonna keep lying to him and honestly I don't know which option hurts me more."

He did have a point but their conversation was getting nowhere.

"Okay, let's try this another way. Why did you see the messages in the first place?"

Sander got a little bit confused by his question and shrugged his shoulders while answering, one of his eyebrow was pulled higher.

"Because he sent them to me?"

"No. I mean yes. He did but you knew they weren't meant to be read."

"No. That's bullshit. He was hoping that one day, somehow I'd read them."

And bingo!

"Aha. Exactly! He wanted you to know. So why are you feeling guilty about it? Yes, it didn't happen the way it should have but there is nothing you can do about it now. Beating yourself up for this is useless. You already read them, there is no going back. And you read them because you wanted to feel closer to this person, wrong or right?" Senne started talking fully with his hands to express his self and dedication more.

"Right."

"Why?" This was going exactly the way he wanted.

"Why what?" Senne wanted to facepalm his self, sometimes this boy can be so dumb, he thought.

"Why did you want to feel closer to him? Because you just like him? Or is there any other reason?"

The question cut him like a knife.

There was another reason.

Talking to him, talking to Robbe, felt like a heaven. It felt normal, like everything was fine and he didn't want to admit but it felt like he became a different person all of a sudden.

He had this "mask" he had to wear, mask of somebody who is just a normal person, who doesn't have that many troubles, whose life isn't out there for every living soul to judge, who can finally do everything he wants and it felt liberating. Like the void and the cage he had his self trapped in, finally managed to break and open and he could come out and fly. And taking to somebody, without stressing that he would say something to hurt his image or reputation felt amazing.

Felt perfect. And he craved it.

Like a drug, he couldn't get enough and he didn't saw the red warning lights blinding his eyesight, telling him that it was time to go back to his own shitty reality.

Maybe he saw, but ignored it.

He was telling his guts "one more day" each night and it kept delaying and delaying until he realized that he was in too deep, and when Robbe threw the bomb at him, without knowing, he crashed down hard.

What he'd give to meet him in the normal circumstances, where he wasn't faking his identity, where he wasn't lying to him, where he wasn't a toxic lunatic, breaking everything he touched.

Maybe, in the other universe, as Robbe would say, they met at the party, or coffee shop, or even at the theaters. Maybe even at the streets.

Maybe it wouldn't be this complicated then.

"Earth to Sander?"

"Hm?"

"Did you hear anything I said?"

"No. Sorry."

Senne sighed. "It's okay. Do you have any solution?"

"No. All I know is that I don't want to forget him." Such a powerful statement to say out loud.

"Then don't."

"It's not that easy."

Anything is easy if you want it to be, Senne wanted to add but decided against it. It's too much and too deep thinking for now.

"Hey, what if you just relax for a while? At least until you feel better and then we will figure something out. How does that sound?"

"It sounds stressful."

At that, Senne laughed and Sander smiled too.

"Okay, then what about you call you mom first and then we're gonna continue talking and discuss what you're going to do. What are you thinking about this option?"

Sander looked him up and down, checked if he was telling the truth, if he was promising that he'd be there with him and when he got a warming little smile in return, he knew, he definitely wasn't alone and no matter what, two head was better than one, specially when one of them couldn't think straight.

"That's chill."

Chapter 3.9

#im so sorry about the spaces between pharagraphs #i tried to fix it but tumblr isnt letting me #i reread it so many times and also tumblr kept deleting sentences when i wanted to make soacw between them so i just hope it makes sense #wtfock #wtfam #sobbe #robbe ijzermans #robbe x sander #sander driesen #social media au #i feel like i should have written more to explain sanders emotions #lowkey disapointed in myself but i just wanted to upload it as fast as possible #i hope you guys saw what is going on with him

[ravenbrenna09]

Jij Verliest - Chapter Five: Clip 2

master list previous

...

Zondag 18:53

With hurried goodbyes to the people spamming ‘bye!’ in the chat, Robbe ended his surprise Sunday afternoon stream and immediately slumped against his desk.

During the semester, Robbe didn’t stream on Sundays. He preferred to spend the time studying with Yasmina or simply doing homework. His plan was to keep the same schedule for the summer, simply to keep things consistent, and save his Sundays for skating with his friends or hanging out with Sander. But the beach house trip was going to prevent him from streaming for three days. Once he got back, Robbe knew that he would need to get back on a consistent schedule.

Today’s stream was unplanned and a surprise, but it had been one of the best streams that he had in weeks. 

Normally, Robbe would’ve only streamed for three hours. It was what his body was used to and Robbe was rigorous about keeping his streams uniform. Occasionally, he would extend the stream or shorten it in thirty minute intervals. But, normally, he couldn’t extend the stream by more than an hour. Until today. He had just ended the stream a few minutes shy of five hours.

As soon as he started the stream, Robbe had felt rejuvenated. His good mood was helped by Sander’s “good luck <3” text when Robbe informed him that he would be disappearing for a few hours. But, in the midst of studying for exams and his stressed-out streams, he had missed doing this. He had missed streaming simply because he could and hanging out with his viewers, who he saw as his friends. It was fun and exhilarating and he had missed it all. 

Plus, the fact that Sander was probably watching him sent a thrill up his spine. It made him more excited than he would ever admit to any of his friends. But the extended time in his chair had stiffened his legs and his joints. Even though Robbe had taken multiple five-minute breaks, he was still tense. 

As Robbe stood, stretching his body as far as he could, his phone buzzed on the desk and drew his attention.

Sander: Amazing stream, Mr. Streamer. Even if I don’t know a thing about Fortnite. Feeling stiff? 

Robbe chuckled, picking up his phone as he moved out of his room.

Robbe: Yeah, I’m walking around the apartment. Might not sit down for another 30 min. Did you get any drawings done?

It didn’t take long to respond. 

Sander: Of course, I’m still working on your concentrated face though. Wanna see?

As Robbe sent him the affirmative, he headed out of his bedroom. Across the hall, Zoë’s bedroom door was slightly open and he glanced inside to find her sleeping. Zoë was curled up on her bed, wrapped in her gray blanket, with her hair tied back. Her laptop was perched on the edge of the bed, playing a show. 

As Robbe closed his bedroom door behind him, his stomach gave an angry growl, reminding him he had waited too long. Robbe quickly moved in the direction of the kitchen, where he could hear voices. Rounding the corner, he spotted Milan at the kitchen table with Senne. Both of them were drinking what looked like a cup of hot cocoa. As Robbe stepped inside, Milan cut Senne off mid-sentence to ask, “How was your stream?”

Robbe blinked, confused. “It was fine.” Senne turned to him, smiling nervously, as Robbe headed to the fridge to pull out the leftovers from earlier. “I’m just getting some food. It should only take a few minutes. Then, the two of you can go back to your top-secret talk that I’m not supposed to hear.”

“Oooooo,” Milan said, grinning wickedly. “Is someone jealous that other people go to me with top-secret information?” 

Robbe rolled his eyes and flipped Milan off for good measure. 

“No, no, it’s not that,” Senne said, letting out a sigh. Robbe grabbed one of the plates from the cabinets as he looked over at Senne. Despite being so sure of himself, Senne looked unbelievably nervous—like he was about to jump out of his skin. In all honesty, Robbe wasn’t prepared to see it. “We were just talking about the fact that I’m going to meet your mama on Thursday.” Robbe nodded as he piled the cold spaghetti onto his plate. “Do you have any advice?”

Robbe nodded again, placing the plate into the microwave. Once he started it, Robbe turned back to Senne and Milan, who were waiting on him. “There’s absolutely nothing you need to worry about, Senne,” Robbe said. “Mama is physically incapable of hating anyone. Even my dad and Thomas. As long as you love and take care of Zoë—which you do—she’s going to love you.” 

“There’s always a first,” Senne said. 

“If there was a first time, it would’ve been Thomas,” Robbe deadpanned. 

“Agreed,” Milan said. He reached across the table to take Senne’s hand in his own. “She’s going to love you, Senne. How can she not?” The microwave let out a beep. Robbe moved to pull his steaming pasta out. He blew away the steam as he crossed the kitchen, taking up one of the spare chairs. Robbe extended his legs out beneath the table, stretching them until they popped. “You love her daughter and that’s all any mother would want. Especially Marie.”

Robbe nodded. “Nothing to worry about.” 

“Okay,” Senne said, turning to him. “I’m trusting you.” Robbe chuckled, taking a bite of his pasta. “How did your exams go?” Senne asked. Robbe glanced over at Senne, who had turned in his chair. “I didn’t see you at the party Friday night.”

“Are you still going to college parties?” Robbe asked. 

“Only when my girlfriend is.”

“Oh, did someone spend the night with his mystery man that we don’t know anything about?” Milan asked, raising his mug to his mouth. Robbe rolled his eyes as Milan suggestively waved his eyebrows. Beside him, Senne took a sip of his hot cocoa. He tried his best to seem indifferent, but Robbe could still spot the suggestive look on Senne’s features. “Come on, Robbe. It’s a safe space. If we talk about it, I’m sure Senne won’t mind.”

Robbe was certain he couldn’t roll his eyes harder. “Sometimes, I wonder why you’re so interested in everyone’s love life,” Robbe said. Senne snorted. Thankfully, he wasn’t holding his cocoa anymore. Senne covered his face with his hand as Milan sent him an accusatory stare. “But yes, I did stay with him. We went to his apartment, he cooked, and we stayed in his bedroom all night, playing video games.” 

“Good,” Milan said, grinning. “You seem happy with him.” 

“I am,” Robbe said, nodding. He took another bite of spaghetti before letting out a sigh. Milan raised an eyebrow and Senne glanced over at him. Despite the growling in his stomach, Robbe dropped his fork on his plate and leaned back. “I just wish Thomas would leave me alone.”

“Thomas?” Milan asked, raising his eyebrows. 

Senne glanced at Robbe, asking, “Your ex?” 

“Yeah, that’s the one,” Robbe said. “After my exam on Friday, as I headed out to meet ‘my mystery man,’ Thomas came up to me.” Robbe shook his head, letting out a sigh. “He gave me the watch back and told me that he wanted to get back together with me.” Milan’s eyes widened. “I was so angry that I couldn’t respond to him, but—uhh… the guy I’m seeing interrupted him and Thomas left soon after that.”

“Do you want to get back together with him? With Thomas?” Senne asked.

Before Senne finished the question, Robbe was shaking his head. “No,” Robbe said. “I don’t.”  

“If you don’t want to get back together with him, you need to tell that to Thomas face-to-face, Robbe,” Senne said. He crossed his arms over his chest as Milan took a sip of his cocoa. “He deserves to hear it from you in person. If he can’t understand, that’s on him.” 

“I know,” Robbe said, slumping back in his chair. “I’m just worried that he’s going to try and talk me into getting back together with him. Again.”

“Do you want me to come with you?” Senne asked, standing up from his chair. “I don’t mind.” He moved to the coffee maker. As the machine whirred to life, he moved around, starting to make another cup of hot cocoa. Once the machine started brewing, Senne added, “I’ve always been pretty good at scaring people away. Plus my parents will pay for pretty good lawyers.”

Robbe chuckled, shaking his head. “No, but I’ll keep that in mind. I’ll probably end up asking Jens or Moyo to come with me. I just don’t want to be worried about my ex showing up at the apartment for the third or fourth time.” As Robbe picked up his fork, his phone dinged in his pocket. 

“You could always go to the police,” Senne said. 

Milan nodded. “He’s right, Robbe.”

“Yeah,” Robbe said, pulling his phone from his pocket. “I just don’t want to have to deal with it. But if it gets too much and he keeps showing up, I promise that I will report him to the police.” Milan nodded and, from his spot at the coffee machine, Senne made an affirmative noise. 

“It’ll be okay, Robbe,” Milan said.  

Robbe nodded his head, turning his attention back to his phone. 

Sander: Sorry for the delay. Noor came into my room asking about dinner. Here are all my sketches.

Below his texts, a picture loaded in of a sheet of paper—or rather many sheets of paper—and Robbe had to stop himself from literally dropping his mouth open. If these were simply “sketches,” Robbe couldn’t help but wonder what Sander’s masterpieces would look like. In the middle of the page, his own profile was etched in with headphones over his ears. There were a handful of figures that looked like they could’ve been Pokémon, but Robbe didn’t recognize them. 

Robbe was so focused on absorbing each and every detail that he didn’t notice Senne walk up behind him. He peered over Robbe’s shoulder, holding tightly to the cup of cocoa with one hand. His presence behind Robbe had startled him, but Senne’s gaze was simply on his phone. As Robbe glanced up at him, Senne smiled down at the phone and gave him a knowing look. 

If Senne recognized Sander’s sketches, he didn’t say anything. In fact, Senne just returned to the table and struck up a conversation with Milan about work.

...

Zondag 20:34

#wtfock #wtfam #sander driesen #sobbe #robbe ijzermans #rosander #brenna writes #jij verliest fic #wtfock fanfiction #wtfock fanfic #wtf fanfic #twitch streamer robbe #twitch streamer!robbe #tattoo artist!sander #tattoo artist sander

[ghosttotheparty]

say my name and say it twice (cotton candy skies)

20. also on AO3 chapter nineteen

Lucas’s face falls as he rereads the words on his screen. 

Call ended.

He lets himself deflate, his shoulders dropping as he sighs, closing his eyes. He puts his elbows on his desk in front of him, holding his face in his hands as he squeezes his eyes shut, tensing his face and shoulders before collapsing, dropping so his head rests on his forearms, crossing on the cold surface of his desk. He feels it against his skin, the sleeves of his worn sweater rolled up past his elbows, and he embraces it, focuses on it, lets it consume him, until he lifts his head, pulling his sleeves down over his hands, tugging them past his fingers and gripping them in his fists, the material twisted around his fingers. He lifts his hands and rubs the material on his face, letting it scratch gently, his eyes still closed.

He lets himself be alone.

The flat is empty, Zoë and Senne off somewhere, Milan on a lunch date, and it’s silent, except for the hum of his heater and the quiet sounds of the flat settling, creaks in the wood floor and doors. His hands drift from his face, crossing over his chest to cradle his shoulders, which are slightly shrugged up, uncomfortable and stiff. 

He doesn’t notice his feet tapping the ground anxiously, hitting against the wood of the floor and of the leg of his char, doesn’t notice his teeth tugging at his bottom lip, biting the skin, doesn’t notice how it hurts. He doesn’t hear anything. 

So he jumps when he hears his computer chime loudly, after who knows how long, and he looks up when it continues, the screen glowing, letting him know that Ralph is calling him. 

He lets go of himself, pushing his shoulders down and rubbing his face quickly, taking a deep breath before he answers, forcing a smile. 

“Hey.”

“Hello, my love!” Ralph is grinning, his arms crossed on the table in front of him, a table Lucas doesn’t recognise. He doesn’t recognise the room behind Ralph either, the wall that sunlight is streaming across, or the fixture hanging from the ceiling. “Are you okay?” 

Lucas looks from the fixture to Ralph and sees that his smile has dropped slightly, his brows furrowed. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” he lies. “Uhm, where are you?” 

“I’m in Norway, visiting a friend.” Ralph looks over his computer screen and waves a hand. 

Another man joins him, tossing an arm around Ralph’s shoulders. He has short strawberry blonde hair. He looks kind of like a fairy. 

“Hi, I’m Eskild,” he says in English, and Lucas smiles, waving. 

“Hey,” Lucas says, pointing at him, suddenly recognising him. “You were at that party in Utrecht, right?” 

Eskild nods, grinning. 

“I’m Lucas.”

“Ralph has told me all about you, he loves you.” 

“Aw.” Lucas grins as Ralph shoves at Eskild. (There’s a “Shut up!” that Lucas almost misses.) 

“You said you had to tell me something?” Ralph asks when Eskild lets go of him, stepping to the side. 

“Yeah, so—”

“Is it okay that I’m here?” Eskild interrupts, holding his hands up. “I can leave if you want.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine. Actually you’ll probably be happy too, you guys seem to be kindred spirits.” 

Eskild coos excitedly, pulling a chair up next to Ralph’s and Ralph moves over. Lucas waits as they get situated. 

“Okay, tell us,” Ralph says, and they both look up at him. 

“So…” Lucas takes a deep breath. He pauses, hearing a creak in the floor, and waits for a few seconds, listening, and continues when he doesn’t hear anything else. “I have a boyfriend.” 

“You have a what?” Ralph practically yells and Eskild exclaims and claps. Lucas giggles, covering his face. “Wait, say that again, I wanna hear it again.”

“I have a boyfriend.” 

“Oh my god.” Ralph takes a heavy breath and looks away before looking back. “Do you remember when you told me—” “Ralph, sto-o-op.” 

“—that you didn’t think you’d ever find someone?” 

Eskild watches them, his jaw dropped, his hands still clasped in front of him. 

Lucas sighs, smiling, and looks away, exasperated. 

“I think I was…” 

“What?” Eskild prompts when he trails off, and Lucas pauses before finishing his thought. 

“I think I was waiting for him.” 

They both squeal loudly, grabbing at each other, and Lucas laughs. 

“That’s so fucking cute, oh my god,” Ralph says, shoving Eskild’s shoulder.

“I know.”

“What’s his name?” Ralph asks, leaning over, his elbows in the table.

“Jens.” Lucas can feel his face burning, can feel his cheeks flushing bright, and it only makes his smile more. 

“Jens,” Ralph sighs. “Tell us about him, is he pretty?” 

“Yes.” 

They both snicker. 

“How did you meet?” Eskild asks. 

“Uhm… So I just kind of wander the city a lot, and one day I happened to be outside his dance studio when he was finishing practise.” 

“Wait, his what studio?” Ralph asks, his jaw dropped and his eyes wide. 

“Dance? He’s a ballerina.” 

They both start yelling, grabbing at each other again, a mess of  “Oh my go-o-o-od!” and “Ballerina!”, and Lucas laughs again, pressing his sweater-covered hands over his mouth. 

“Lucas, you are… living my dream,” Eskild says when they manage to calm down, and Lucas laughs harder, not knowing what to say. 

“How long have you guys been together?” Ralph asks. 

“Uhm, a few weeks? I don’t really know what actually like, was the start of the relationship, if that makes sense.”

“Explain, please.” 

“Like…” Lucas sighs. “When we first started hanging out, we were already kind of… flirty?” They both are smiling at him, and he keeps talking, trying to ignore it. “Like teasing and stuff, and then holding hands and playing with each other’s hair. And we went on a few dates.” “Where to?” Ralph asks. 

“A cafe, skateparks. Honestly, just us hanging out outside his studio felt like dates.” 

“That’s precious,” Eskild says. 

“Who made the first move?” Ralph asks, setting his chin on his palm. 

“Uhm,” Lucas pauses, thinking. “I asked to hang out first. And then I kissed him, but we didn’t talk about it at all. And then I told him to kiss me because he was taking too long.”

“Ooo, Lucas is bold.” 

He shrugs, smiling bashfully. 

“Wait, have you guys…” Ralph doesn’t finish the question, lowering his chin and raising his eyebrows as Eskild punches his shoulder.

“Ralph…” Lucas looks away, feeling like he just shoved his face into a pool of lava, suppressing a smile. 

“I can’t tell if that’s a yes or a no.” 

“No, we haven’t.” 

“Okay,” Ralph says, holding his hands up like he’s surrendering. “Not a problem.” 

“Do you want to?” Eskild asks, curiosity clearly getting the best of him.

“I mean…” Lucas sighs. “I guess, yeah. But if he doesn’t want to, like if it doesn’t happen, I won’t be upset, you know?” 

“You’re an angel, Lucas van der Heijden,” Ralph says, and Lucas’s smile grows again. 

He doesn’t feel as sad anymore.

Ralph seems to remember at the same time as him. 

“Hey, did something happen before I called? You seemed… off.”

“I, uhm…” He pauses, contemplating whether or not to tell them. “I’d been talking to Jayden.”

“Jayden, skater Jayden?” 

Lucas chuckles at this, the way Ralph has managed to remember his friends that he doesn’t know well. Skater Jayden, Skater Kes, Liv’s Noah, Liv’s Isa, etc.

“That’s the one.”

“Who’s Jayden?” Eskild asks, looking confused. 

“One of Luc’s friends in Utrecht.” 

Eskild nods, looking back to Lucas. 

“Tell us,” Ralph says, and Lucas almost laughs at the seriousness of it all, at how they’re both looking at him like they’re his dads.

“I don’t know, I haven’t really been keeping up with him or Kes. Or anyone, really, except you and Noah. And we just happened to be online at the same time so he asked if I wanted to call and I said yeah, so…” He pauses, rubbing his face, feeling them both looking at him. “It was awkward at first, just because we haven’t been talking, and then it was fine, and then—” He cuts himself off, huffing and tossing his hands, suddenly frustrated. Pissed. 

“What happened?” Eskild presses softy. 

“I don’t know, he just… He started acting weird and then he kind of made a comment that like… that I’ve changed. And I tried to just shrug it off and I made a joke about moving countries, and he acted like… Like it was weird.” 

“What the hell?” Ralph drops his hand and makes a face. “Did he say anything?” 

“He said ‘You’ve changed,’ and then ‘Why are you acting like this?’ but when I asked what he meant he just changed the subject. And when we hung up it was just really uncomfortable and weird, and I just…” 

“What the hell?” Ralph repeats.  

“He seemed upset,” Lucas adds, his voice small, and for a second he thinks they couldn’t hear him. 

“He can’t be upset about that,” Eskild says suddenly, looking at Ralph and then Lucas on the screen. “That’s what people do.” 

“Yeah, exactly,” Ralph says, pointing at him. “That’s basically the meaning of life. The whole point of existence is change and growth.” Lucas listens intently. “And he may not know it but the way that you’ve changed has been growth. Every time we’ve talked since you moved to Antwerp, you seem more and more at ease with yourself, and you seem happier and happier.” 

Lucas smiles. 

“He can’t be mad that you’re changing,” Ralph continues, looking angry. “If you walk into a forest and find a sprig, you can’t be mad when you go back five years later and find a tree. That’s not—” He huffs and Eskild places a hand on his forearm. 

“He has no reason to be upset,” Eskild continues for him. “It’s not like he hasn’t changed at all, right?” 

“His hair is longer,” Lucas contributes. “And he has a new earring.”

“There you go, are you mad about it?” 

Lucas laughs. 

“No.” 

“Exactly. Jayden’s a dummy.” 

Lucas and Ralph laugh again, shaking their heads at Eskild. 

“And why haven’t you been talking to them, was it just, like…” Ralph asks. 

“I don’t know, when I first moved we talked a lot and kept up, but eventually it felt like I was the only one actually trying. Like, all their texts felt dry, and I just felt like they didn’t want to talk to me.” They nod. “Which could just be anxiety, but I stopped texting first as much and it just dwindled.” 

“So none of them really talk to you?” Ralph says, looking surprised, and Lucas shakes his head. 

“Not really.” 

“You can’t give a hundred percent in a relationship with someone who won’t even give fifty,” Eskild says, and Ralph nods, pointing at him. 

“Yeah,” Lucas sighs. “I’m kind of  over it, I’m not that mad.”

They both look at him, looking sympathetic, their eyes soft. 

“I mean, it hurt at first. But I’ve got Jens. And you guys, and Noah. And some friends here. It’ll be fine.”

Ralph smiles sadly. 

“That’s true. You’ll always have people.” 

“I’ll always have people.” 

There’s a moment of silence and then Lucas snickers quietly. 

“You guys are good… what’s the word I’m looking for, mentors? Confidants?”

“Gurus,” they say simultaneously, and then exclaim and point at each other excitedly as Lucas says, “That’s  it!” 

Ralph and Eskild laugh hysterically, and Lucas can’t help but laugh with them. 

He gets Eskild’s phone number and Instagram before they hang up. 

#TRIPLE CROSS OVER #also yes i am aware that jens would be a ballerino #actually he rly wouldnt bc hes a student but #whatever #van der stoffels #vds #lucas van der heijden #jens stoffels #jens x lucas #wtfock #wtfock fic #skam nl #skam nl fic #say my name and say it twice #cotton candy skies #cotton candy skies always look better in person

[chappedandfadedvds]

Nov 7th, Saturday 14:20

„Happy birthday!!“

„Thank you so much, can I be celebrated for days now every year? I really enjoy this.“ Jens joked as he stepped into the livingroom following Senne who had let him and Lotte in.

They even had put up a glittery banner and had a couple of colourful balloons grazing the floor. There was a set table and a cake filled with candles to the brim. Probably exactly 18 and Jens was pretty sure he would not be able to blow them all out at once. They all wore these tiny party hat cones on their heads, Lotte loving hers the minute it was put on when they entered.

„Next year were aren’t celebrating at all to equal it out, so you better make the most of it today.“ Sander declared getting up from his shared sofa with robbe, moving over to pull  him into a tight hug. Robbe directly taking over, congratulating Jens once more as the two of them swayed from one foot onto the other in their embrace. He loved this boy so much.

„I can’t believe that you are eighteen. You are becoming a boring adult.“ He heard Robbe whisper giggling as they both pulled back far enough to look at each other grinning, not having let go yet.

„You’ll be eighteen soon too, so you better watch your words, young man.“ Jens joked as he saw his sister being picked up and swung around by Sander. He supposed this and the cake were her only two reasons for coming with.

„At least we have our university years left to fuck it all up, I guess.“ Robbe said happily as Jens kept smiling brightly, while his heart though tightened almost painfully at that thought. He didn’t want to think about it. Not now. Not with people around. Not with Lotte close by to see him.  He swallowed it down and for some sort of miracle did Zoe appeared next to them.

„You can keep cuddling all day, if you want, but I wann hug Jens too.“ She complained quite amused as Robbe stepped away, his eyes immidiately searching for Sander to find him pouring Lotte some tea.

„What do you wanna drink?“ Jens heard the boy asking, as he joined the others by the table.

„Coffee would be great if possible.“

„Coming right up.“ Robbe replied, as Zoë and him hugged, her hand brushing through his hair, cautiously enough to not rip the birthday hat off.

„Happy birthday.“ She said, pecking a kiss to his cheek: „Let’s get some cake. Milan spend at least four hours in the kitchen, so even if it is horrible, smile.“

He snorted at her shaking his head. He was pretty sure the cake was amazing. Milan had found his absolute passion in baking since the first lockdown in march began. And though his cooking really left a large room for improvment, his baking skills was great by now. At least that’s what Robbe had told him and the last couple of weekends really proved him right.

„My turn finally.“ Milan said and another hug ensued as he was taking into the arms of the older boy and pressed tight against his chest. As with Zoë he was pecked a kiss on his cheek and welcomed with a bright smile and best wishes. Milan’s hand took holf of his and thus they both went to join the group a couple meteres away.

Robbe had joined Sander in the meantime, Lotte placed happily chatting away on the older boys lap, gesturing wildly about, as the other two listened intently. A child really suited them, Jens thought. And if fate was on their side and they pulled through all the mental health bullshit, he was conviced that they should have one. At least Sander appeared to enjoy that role.

Milan sat on the second sofa with Zoë and Senne, the later one busy lightening all the candles on the cake. That leaving Jens to take his seat on the armchair across of them.

„Alright. Make a wish.“ Senne set presenting his accomplished work, as Robbe took out his phone to either film or take a picture with. „And hurry, we want cake.“

It took him three tries to blow every single candle out as the other laughed and cheered him on.

He only whished for his mom to stay a little longer, like the little child he felt he still was.

„What the hell is this?“ Jens asked, his eyes wide open as he regarded the big package that Sander had pulled from his and Robbe’s room. It was a paper brown rectangle and decorated with a comically large red bow, like it belonged into a cartoon. 

Zoë and Senne had gifted him a new year playstation plus membership, that he was very greatful for. And Milan had bought him a quite expensive book on music production, that Jens had wanted and was pretty sure Robbe had told him. 

It was nothing compared to the present he was starring at currently infront of him on the floor, as he, followed by everyone else, had gotten up to inspect it.

„Open it!“ Lotte urged excited to his left, pulling his hand forward.

So he did just that. The bow was off in no time and the packet wasn’t that hard to open either.

He was staring in disbelief directly onto a skate board with a photograoh attached to it by tape, that punched the air out of his lungs. 

It wasn’t just a skate board, it was his skate board, or at least a version of it. Because he had a pretty big accident with it, when he was eleven and the board broke and with it his heart, as it had been his very first one. He had cried the whole way home, more over the board than his broken arm and scratched knees. It took him weeks to get over it.

The photo was showing Robbe and him on his eights’s birthday, smiling at the camera, with said board in his little arms.

„Robbe, you didn’t..“ He heard his own voice saying, just barely keeping from trembling. His hand searching blindly for the boy behind him, who got the hint and kneeled next tim him to take it.

„Well it obviously isn’t the same one, but I found all these photographs of us and our boards last year, going through all my mothers stuff, before she was admitted and I knew immidiately that I needed to keep them. I planned back then to get you a board resembling it for your eighteen’s, but fate has it, that I fell for an artist. So while I told him what to do, and what was acurate, Sander drew and painted everything.“ Robbe explained, leaving Jens to continue starring at it, cautiously picking it up to turn it over and back.

He couldn’t believe it. It looked exactly the same, all the weird scribbles and sketches and amateurish tags were plastered across it. Jens felt the need to place it on a pedestal and conserve it, never touching it. This was too good to be true.

„Dude...“ He managed to say, putting the board back down, before his arms slung around his best friend burying his head in his neck, while the other laughed and stroke his back.

„And you too.“ Jens gestured towards Sander to come down as well, so he could hug both of them. 

„I told you he would love it.“ Robbe was told by his boyfriend, before Lotte tackled them.

„I want to be hugged as well.“ She declared pouting, as they let her into their circle, while Jens was still processing his present. 

The next hours Robbe and him spent reminising in old stories, they told the others about. A lot of emberessing ones, Jens thought, but he didn’t really mind. They really had been through a lot together. Robbe was definitely family and Jens couldn’t be more grateful to have him around. He just really hoped that they would all stay in Antwerp.

While Sander still had two years left at the academy, he had voiced interest to move somewhere else for a couple of years to see more of the world. And Jens was pretty sure that Robbe would stick with him, whereever his boyfriend would plan to take them. Jens really didn’t want to loose Robbe as well.

„You good?“ Robbe’s voice pulled him out of it, as Jens noted that the others had went back to the table, finishing of their second round of cake and tea and other sweets that have managed to appear on the table.

Jens nodded lightly at Robbe next to him on the sofa, as they had watched Senne and Sander help his little sister to stand on the used skate board of Robbe. She tried really hard to keep her balance as the two older boys pshed her back and forth across the living room. 

„You know that if you want to talk, that you can always come to me, yea?“ His best friend said smikring as he winked, a clear reminder of last year, were the roles had been reversed and Jens had tried to have Robbe open up.

„I will.“

„You will what?“ Zoë inquired curiously as she looked up from her phone again, having texted Jana and the girls group some pictures of todays little birthday party, as she had explained earlier.

„Let you know, that even though it was Jens’s big day, we spent two hours on Lucas yesterday on zoom. Because you girls and my boyfriend can’t get enough of him.“ Robbe joked, taking Zoë’s phone to read through the last couple of messages.

„See.“ Robbe said as he showed Jens the screen, a conversation about Lucas being the prime subject: „Tsk, tsk, tsk.“

Jens was pretty close to tell Robbe that he really didn’t mind that at all, and that he probably could happily chat about the boy himself for days on end. And one day he would have to let Robbe know as well. He just couldn’t bring himself to do it yet. It was all too new.

„I’ve heard Lucas?“ Milan chimed in and Jens could only laugh at Robbe’s whine: “Not you as well.“

„Topic change!“ He threfore declared loudly, clapping his hands, to help his best friend out and made everyone look at him instead expectantly.

„What’s happening now with your exhibition? We all were so excited to behave in the dumbest way possible on thursday. Even Noor was in on it.“ Sander smirked at him, a fuck you on his lips, as he mouthed it silently at Jens.

„It’s all gonna be virtuell, like a tour through the exhibition pieces, so I guess maybe we could organise a litte zoom party again to go through it together?“ It is the best I can come up with now, if you are actually interested in seeing it, as you won’t have a possibilty to embarrass me infront of my professors.“

„Uh that sounds still fun. And Jana could join too! Let me just post the group.“ Zoë said excited as she took her phone back from Robbe, who turned his eyes a last time towards Jens. All serious as he patted Jens’s hand on the sofa between them.

„I mean it. I’m here to listen.“ He said smiling slightly and then getting up to help Senne make space on the table. They had ordered a big round of Pizza that should arrive soon for dinner.

Jens loved his best friend. He really did.

„We should add Lucas to the group as well.“ Milan proposed, being met with an unanimous approval of everyone else.

Jens shrugged at Robbe smirking back at him. He had tried at least. He took out his phone himself now, looking at their group that let everyone know about a new number been added. He needed to remind himself to text the poor boy later.

Zoë 17:56: Welcome to the best group in Antwerp!

Amber 17:57: Hello, Lucas!!! Glad to have you here 🥰

Noor 17:57: You still have time to run and block this. Once you are in, they will never let you out. Trust me. 😭

Moyo 17:59: Bring weed pls

#week 3 #wtfock #skam #vds #jens stoffels #lucas van der heijden #chapped and faded #flatshare time #bff time

[everyone-has-their-story]

Season 3 episode 5 commentary with my sister:

Remember when I said I knew what was going to happen? LOL to me and my emotions

No, dude go visit your mom!

You and Zoe both need better excuses than “I’m sick”

Sidenote...I am really loving this new location

No Jens, everything is not chill thanks for asking though

Robbe you don’t need weed! You need to talk

No one cares about the broerrrs right now

Noor and him fighting are the least of his problems

Thanks for finally being interested in his life Jens

I mean yeah she wants to have sex, but not really on his list of problems 

Sex is overrated? Is that because you have toothpaste? 

Please stop talking about this with him

Jens’ advice in a nutshell: Have sex, don’t have sex, its “eh”, but c’est la vie 

Incorrect, Jens. She likes him and he likes Sander. Thanks for playing though.

Fucking hell….you’re telling the wrong person you miss them! I don’t have time for this Robbe

Yeah thanks for your shitty advice, but I’m glad you’re being a friend

Oh no no no no!! I don’t like the looks of this at all

Also, what happened to firefighter Robbe from the vlogs? All these candles are a fire hazard

Actually this whole fucking situation is a hazard

Robbe stop! Abort!

*face palms*

I want to feel bad for her but I’m too focused on feeling bad for him

That is not the face of a guy who is enjoying this (robbe takes off her bra)

Wait...did it happen or not?

His face is making me feels level of sad I didn’t know existed

Thank fucking christ that didn’t happen

Oh she is so sweet, I feel bad for her

There will be no next time

Pause it! I know I joke a lot but the fact that he even felt the need to try this is making me so fucking sad…like he tries so hard to be who he isn’t and i hate that for him. And whoever this actor is, is playing the hell out of this character. Bravo my dude….okay play *sighs*

Sweet lord we are only 7 minutes in??

Milan, I know there are weird ass windows on the door but feel free to knock

Read the room, Milan! He is in turmoil, we don’t have time for your shirts!

Yes! Talk to him..thank you!

Hahahhaha Milan you might need more than 15 minutes

You can do it, Robbe. You need to get this out

Repeat after me..”I think I’m gay”  you can do it!

Robbe, my love, that kiss suggests that you are in fact into him

Milan is me, I am Milan, we are one

Why must people always mention Noor when he is trying to open up, can we just focus on Robbe?

Milan, give me your number I am looking for a therapist

This is everything Robbe needed to hear

You are normal! You’re just a little confused and sad right now

Scratch that, you aren’t just normal you are fucking phenomenal 

When Milan speaks, we all listen

*whispers* this scene is so good

Milan for President! Our president is garbage so the job is all yours

He IS looking better! Thanks for noticing, Jens. Look at you with your 20/20 vision

LOOOOL matchmaker? I hope no one is paying you because you suck at it

HE IS GOING TO TELL HIM! YESSSSS

Hey now ,“shitty” is a bit of an exaggeration

he’s going to do it!

NOOOOO don’t say “her”!!

His face..

Oh wtf!! He was trying to talk...AGAIN! Ughhhh

Robbe needs some sunscreen

Noor is back...cool?

Hopefully you ain’t gonna be “with him” much longer

This is an odd song choice for this atmosphere

Robbe out here making confetti while having an existential crisis and Noor is ordering soup 

You looked it up? Did it happen to say “possibly gay” under the list of causes?

Time for yourself? So no Sander?

Yeah this is definitely an odd song choice

Sorry, Noor...you’re sweet but he’s gotta go

Robbe pick up your damn trash!

She will in fact NOT be enjoying that (the soup😂)

I respect him for actually ending it

Wait where are we?

He doesn’t know his own school?

AHHH! Sander!

Omg I’m fucking dumb..it’s Sander’s school...I hate me

Me and Robbe have the same smile when we see Sander

Okay now is not the time for a bathroom break Robbe

Don’t worry about your hair, you look great as always

If looks could kill..

Okay I’m rooting for you Robbe, but I don’t blame him, you fucked up

Cool...that was fun...love seeing Robbe unhappy...my fave

*gasps* he’s back!!

5 minutes? Okay you got this

He’s got a point…

Don’t we all? Get in line (Says he loves him)

You damn right you fucked up

The kiss was mind blowing for everyone, trust me

Is that a small smile I see??

Yes, one more chance, I’m down with that

Ah!! Yeah fuck it (chernobyl)

Oh sweet baby Jesus thank god!!

This whole scene is just amazing, Robbe doing this out in the open? Love that for him

Robbe ain’t letting him go nowhere

No...forget the phon--- oh hell no! Not her!

She fucking better be in the past

Yes, future! Eternity, all of it

No don’t go, stay!

The smiles! My smile! Everyone gets a smile!

Pause it! I have never seen someone so relieved and happy. I feel like he is really starting to figure himself out, you know? I just love that that scene wasn’t over the top, it was simple but amazing. Are you listening to me? (yes) I have so many thoughts right now, please hold *rewatches the scene* okay you can proceed…

Chernobyl? Is this going to become their thing instead of universes? I’m down with that

HAPPY ROBBE FOR 2 SCENES!

Secrets, secrets are no fun..unless they are Robbe’s, then back off

Sooo whatcha get?? (Zoe’s letter)

Oh no, nvm don’t wanna know anymore...make it go away

The preppy psycho is back...fucking hell

AHHH! Sander is back!

The difference between him kissing Sander and him kissing Noor is like night and day

Y’all are fucking adorable

He drew that?? Remember when I liked Even’s drawings?...Sander said nah bitch here you go

I have a wall in my room if you want to paint it there, I’m down

Feeding Robbe? Sure. Feeding Britt? He said SIKE!

Romeo and Juliet..okay I see you wtfock

PAUSE! Omgggggg was he the photographer in like the first episode??? Well fuck me, I’m still dumb.*presses play*

I know I said I wanted happy Robbe, but I feel so overwhelmed right now

His voice is so soothing

Ooop okay so they are still doing the universe thing

Robbe can’t stop touching his hair and honestly...same

You Marvel loving gays

If my bf ever said this shit to me I’d smack him, but coming from them...I love every second of it

Great, sad Sander...why can’t we have nice things

Why are they so fucking great together??

Robbe, I love this new you (straddles Sander)

We ALL fell for you, Robbe

You’re damn right he is the one...lucky bastard

He WAS there!!! I love how I connect shit like 4 episodes later

Robbe initiating every kiss makes me so happy

Forget the text! 

Did he just kiss his shoulder?

SON OF A BITCH! Can this girl go away? jfc

Jealousy level 100

Kinda sus…

He loves jealous Robbe

My dude we are ALL happy you’re in this dimension, lets send Britt to a different one shall we?

Pause it! *rewinds to watch scene again*

He disappeared into the night…

How’d he know he was awake? He got a nanny-cam in that room?

You smooth little bitch Sander

He didn’t deny the bf comment, I’m so proud

Remember when I said I was proud of you? I take that back right now..

I hate it. Stop talking Robbe.

I stand by my statement: Milan for President

Cool….that was great….I’ve always wanted an upset Milan….

Robbe just got knocked down about 5 pegs and he deserved it

Senne..not the time my friend

Wait what?? Are they on a date??

Y’all are dorks..i fucking love it

There is so much to focus on right now..

If anyone wants to know what love looks like, I got a scene to show you

Okay Sander I see you...

*singing selena gomez song* can’t keep my hands to myself...I want you all to myself*

Seeing Robbe like this after the previous scene makes me torn 

Robbe like needs to be attached to Sander huh?

This is the best scene ever and I’m aware I’ve said that for about 100 other scenes

Robbe you’re adorable and confident, i love it

OH FUCK YOU!! Why do they do this to me?!

Buy me a ticket to Belgium, I gotta have a chat with some dickheads

Forget the bikes! Just leave!

WHY?! I can’t watch…

Is it over?

*big sigh* I honestly have no words…

This is going to have one of them pull away from the other isn’t it? Don’t answer that..I know it will...

I would just like to state that Robbe the king of internalized homophobia just made out with his boyfriend out in the open for everyone to see not once but twice

...I’ll be ready to process in like 15 minutes, I’m going to get more comfort food...

#wtfock #kennedy watches wtfock

[voldemorthatesnose96]

belle âme

It got yeeted so I reposted it again. Sorry everyone

Robbe is a kindergarten teacher where Sander’s brother named Noah is a new student there

If you can find the easter egg, please comment!😂

For most people, children is such a nuisance. Their never-end chattering, yelling, screaming, breaking things, crying unnecessarily, throwing tantrums—well, you all know the rest. Being a parent to children is one thing, but being their teacher is a whole new level of stress. Especially when you’re working at the kindergarten school.

Almost all teachers here are complaining about the same thing every single day, and to be honest, for Robbe IJzermans; the first youngest teacher since this school was opened in 2001, feel like their useless talking is way more annoying than the child’s tantrum.

As usual, he’s the first person coming at school and minding his own business while eating sandwiches when not long after, a couple of another teachers are entering the room and groaning in unison about what kind of disaster they’ll get today. Robbe only give them a reluctant smile when he’s being asked about how annoying some students are.

Why don’t you just quit then?, he swears internally.

Robbe quickly sigh in relief when the clock strike at 7.25 AM, which means that the class is going to start in 5 minutes. After saying goodbye to other teachers, he swiftly making his way to the class.

Robbe is always have doubts in his mind, but one thing for sure and also something that he’ll always be proud of, is the fact that his students love and respect him. Robbe doesn’t know how it happens and never in his life, he ever think that these students will get along him like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Not gonna lie, he always cries when his one of his student gives him a simple note after the class’s end—a very innocent note like “thankssss yuuuuu for todayyyy mr IJzermanzzz! We lovvvessss yuuu SO MUCH!” with a doodle underneath it. So far, the notes he’s getting is more than 20 now and they’re all safe inside his desk at home.

Robbe IJzermans love children and will always be. It might be weird for some people, but it’s true. Every word of it.

“Good morning, everyone!” Robbe greet them with a smile as bright as the sun.

“Good morning, mr IJzermans!” The students greets back in unison, way louder than it should be but Robbe never mind it.

Robbe puts down the textbooks on his desk and says, “we have a great news today! Anyone can guess?”

In an instant, this class is filled with students’ noise. Robbe has to calm them down for a while before they can actually answer.

“New game?” Moyo Makadi raise his hand and jumping excitedly.

“Tour?” Zoe Loockx’s eyes widen at this thought but try hard not to get too ahead of herself.

“Story-telling?” Aaron Jacobs suggest. His curly hair is looking even more curly for these past days; Wonder why.

The other boy who sits beside him rolls his eyes. Senne de Smet is always be the brain in the class and also the most composed, “you is very dumb.”

“Senne, you can’t say that.” Robbe gently remind him. “Say sorry, please?”

“Sorry.” Senne immediately obey.

“And what should we say, then?” Robbe asks the whole class.

“IT IS OKAY, SENNE!”

Robbe grins widely, feeling proud, “good job, everyone!” then he pulls out a piece of paper from his files. “Because none of you guess it right, I will reveal the answer. Drum rolls, please!”

Robbe and his students are tapping the desks together for few seconds before Robbe’s voice stop them.

“We are going to have a new friend!” He announces happily.

When his students are just looking at him in bewilderment, Robbe can’t help but feel confuse and also have this weird urge to laugh because of the faces they’re making right now; it’s like he just said something peculiar and shocking.

“What’s wrong?”

There’s only one student who’s brave enough to raise their hand.

“Yes, Jens?”

“Mr IJzermans, are you going to like this new friend more than us?”

This is WHY Robbe love children so much. Besides their tantrums and everything, but their innocence is the one that not so many people can appreciate.

Robbe examine every single face of his students and they all showing the same concern. So he says, “I will like him as much as I like you all. This is a promise. Please, don’t worry anymore. Okay, class?”

The effect of his words is gradually seen from the children’s expression.

“OKAY, MR IJZERMANS!”

“Please stay calm while I’m gone to meet him. Thank you!”

Robbe thought the new student (Robbe remembers his name is Noah Driesen) will be waiting in front of the office like other kid usually do but no; Noah is already waiting beside his classroom, looking frightened until his grips on his backpack strap is too tight.

Robbe kneeling in front of him until his height is almost the same like Noah’s, looking at his nervous green eyes and says, “you must be Noah Driesen, right?”

The little kid doesn’t answer, still too scared to say anything.

Robbe offers his hand, “hello, Noah. My name is Robbe IJzermans, your new teacher.”

But Noah still not giving any reaction.

This isn’t the first time since Robbe has been working as a teacher, dealing with something like this. So as a gentle yet careful approach, he places his hand on top of Noah’s handgrip.

“Okay, you don’t need to shake my hand but can I ask you few questions? You just need to nod or shake your head, okay?”

Even though Noah is clearly worried but he give Robbe’s request a nod. Robbe see this as a chance.

“Very good,” he smiles kindly. “The first question is, if I ask you to look at me, would you do it?”

Noah take a few second to think about it, then ever so slowly, he lifts his eyes to looks at Robbe’s warm chocolate eyes.

“It’s easy, isn’t it?” Noah smile nervously, while Robbe is trying to loosen the grip without him noticing. “The second question is, would you be my friend, Noah?”

Once again, the little kid nods but more confident this time. This make Robbe feel genuinely happy and content.

“Last question is, are you still afraid? Now that I’m your friend?”

For the first time ever, Noah finally speak, “no, mr IJzermans.”

Robbe ruffle Noah’s brunette hair, get up from the kneeling position (his legs are a bit numb) and offer his hand again.

“Shall we go to class now?”

Noah take his hand and hold it tightly, “yes, please!”

What an adorable kid, Robbe thought with awe.

It’s a huge relief that the whole class seems to be welcoming and warming up to Noah immediately. Jens even offering the seat beside him once Noah’s done introducing himself.

The class is officially starting at 8.30 AM and most of them are pleading to draw instead of doing basic mathematic. Of course, Robbe can’t refuse. Rules be damned.

“Alright, take out your crayons and drawing book, make everything that you want! Have fun!”

“YAAAAAAY!”

Suddenly Noah raise his hand, “mr IJzermans, I don’t bring anything to draw.”

A curly-haired girl wearing glasses named Luca is walking towards him immediately while bringing her crayons and colored pencils with her.

“Here! We can share!”

Robbe also give Noah his new drawing book. He always bring one or two in case one of his student is forget to bring it here.

“For you. Use it well.”

“THANK YOU, LUCA!” Noah beams. “THANK YOU, MR IJZERMANS!”

After few shouting from the students and flying crayons in the air later, they’re all finally finished with their drawings. Noah is the last kid to hand his work. But before he leaves, he asks Robbe to kneel again.

“Yes?”

“Mr IJzermans, can Noah marry you?”

This isn’t the first time Robbe is being asked for something like this from the other girl students before, but considering it comes from a boy he just teached today, Robbe can’t help but feel a bit surprised, but also happy. The determination on Noah’s face is incredible; it makes Robbe want to pinch his cheeks.

“You don’t mind that I’m also a boy?”

Noah shakes his head strongly, “no. Noah do not mind!”

Robbe place his hand on Noah’s head and softly says, “then, I’ll gladly marry you.”

“Really?!”

“Really really!”

Noah hold his yelp then plead, “can I tell my big brother too, mr IJzermans? Will you meet him later?”

How could Robbe said no that face? Or any children’s face, in general? Naaaah...

“I’d love to.”

“YAY!”

And without saying another word, Noah skipping happily to his seat while Robbe watching him in awe. Why does kids are super adorable? It hurts sometimes.

The rest of today’s lesson is going well. Even though, there’s one student named Britt Ingelbrecht, who cry because Jana Ackerman accidentally hit her head with a ruler before the class end. Robbe has to calm them both for nearly twenty minutes and being grateful that they’re finally okay.

After saying goodbye to each of the students by doing a high-five on their way out, Noah is now offering his hand, pouting slightly—perhaps thinking that Robbe is forgetting that he’s supposed to mee his older brother after school.

Robbe is grinning widely as he take Noah’s little hand and walking side by side.

“Mr IJzermans will looooove big brother as much as Noah do!”

“Is that so?” Robbe replies calmly.

Noah is skipping now, “YES!”

But then when they’re about to exit the building, Noah is pointing his finger at a boy around Robbe’s age with hair as white as freshly fallen snow, wearing black everything; making him as a living depiction of Yin and Yang itself because of the contrast between his hair and the clothes he’s wearing. The first thought that comes to Robbe’s mind about this boy is ‘alluring’, and Robbe can’t look away from him.

“That’s Noah’s big brother, mr IJzermans.”

“Oh...okay...”

Robbe stutters as Noah pull his hand to walk towards his brother, who’s now smiling brightly of seeing Noah before his eyes lands on Robbe. The same green eyes like Noah’s, but a bit darker and probably hide many deep emotions there. Robbe gulp at the thought.

“Noah, who is this?” The boy asks.

“Big brother, this is Noah’s new teacher, Mr IJzermans! He helped Noah today with drawing and ma... mathmmmatical...”

“Mathematics.” Robbe corrects little Noah slowly.

“Yes yes, numbers. Noah do not like.”

His older brother doesn’t say anything but he gives Robbe a smirk, and his heart beats fast in the matter of seconds.

“Guess what... guess what, big brother! Come on! Guess!”

“What is it, little brother?”

“Mr IJzermans agreed to marry Noah!!!!”

Noah’s brother instantly pierce his stare at Robbe again. Though, it looks like he’s more curious and somewhat amused rather than feeling weird about it.

“Is that true?”

Feel like Robbe’s tongue is tied in a knot, so he just nods once. Sincerely hoping his cheeks and his neck aren’t turning red right now.

“Noah?”

“Yes, big brother?”

“What if I marry your teacher first?”

How dare this stranger asks such question in front of his own little brother?! And most importantly, his tone is as light as a feather and very devil-may-cry like; as if this question is something he’s been asking a lot of times before?

But why why why does Robbe’s feel butterflies in his stomach?! Is this normal for everybody?!

“Sir, you can’t...”

“Sander,” he cuts Robbe quickly. “Don’t call me sir. I feel old.”

Robbe’s taking a deep breath and mildly scolding Sander, “okay, Sander, you can’t say something like that in front of a child.”

“What was your name again?”

“Robbe IJzermans.”

“Okay, Robbe,” Sander mimic Robbe’s tone earlier, also his smirk is still clearly visible. “My brother is way mature than he looks. Don’t worry too much. Right, little brother?”

Noah nods excitedly, “Noah do not mind if you marry mr IJzermans too.”

This need to stop, Robbe thought.

“Just messing around with you,” Sander assures him. “You seemed tense earlier.”

Before Robbe can make a comment, Sander speak again.

“Well, we gotta go now. The traffic’s crazy,” he takes Noah’s hand in his. “Say goodbye to your teacher, Noah.”

Little Noah let go of his brother’s hand and hug Robbe’s waist before wave his hand and say, “See you tomorrow, mr IJzermans!”

“See you tomorrow.”

Much to Robbe’s surprise, Sander suddenly asks his brother to say goodbye to his other friends, which Noah happily obey. Now, there’s just the two of them talking, face to face.

“thanks for taking care of my brother,” the bleached hair guy say so very gently. “It means a lot to me.”

“Don’t be. I’m his teacher after all,” Robbe smiles reassuringly. “He’s very good at drawing. Just so you know.”

Sander looks like he’s contemplating. But when he opens his mouth to say something, he immediately closes it again, and instead, gives Robbe a thankful smile and says, “thanks nonetheless. I’ll see you around, then? Maybe?”

Robbe nods, “sure, Sander.”

Sander

Instead of turning his body to walk towards the building, Robbe’s feet somehow glued to where he’s standing, watching these brothers genuinely care for each other really warm his heart. Though one thing for sure, the bleached hair boy, Sander Driesen, will fill up Robbe’s mind for the rest of the day.

And he doesn’t mind it. At all.

#wtfock #wtfam #fanfic #IT GOT YEETED

[willimannarai-new]

Avatar tours#1-3: Zurich-Tokyo

«Am nächsten Tag ging die Sonne auf »

Helmhaus Museum, Zurich/CH

4. December 2020 - 24. January 2021.  20. December 2020 -  2. March 2021 - 5. April 2021 

With: Ali Al-Fatlawi, The Bad Conscience (Veru Loremipsum & LS Grave), Seraina Dür & Jonas Gillmann (in collaboration with the Theater Neumarkt Zürich), Philip Matesic, Teresa Pereira, Silvia Popp – Insel Institut, Alicia Velázquez, Guido Vorburger, Wassili Widmer, Willimann/Arai, Mirjam Wirz, Druckatelier Thomi Wolfensberger – curated by Nadja Baldini, Vreni Spieser, Simon Maurer and Daniel Morgenthaler

https://www.stadt-zuerich.ch/kultur/de/index/institutionen/helmhaus/Presse/Presse_am_naechsten_tag.html

Next Day The Sun Came Up – that could be the opening sentence of a novel. The exhibition at Helmhaus is all about breaking out and starting afresh – with the rising sun. It is about the capacity for resistance and regeneration – having overcome sheer exhaustion. It is about the possibilities of renewal. A dozen or so collectives and individuals, idiosyncratic, unconventional and compelling artists from Zurich, are putting themselves and their work out there at Helmhaus.

We actually came up with this title Next Day The Sun Came Up back in 2019. With its interwoven allusions to past, present and future, it could easily be the title of a novel or even of a rom-com. Today, we are all aware that the whole world is like some penny-dreadful. There is no guarantee of a happy ending. The only thing we know for sure is that the sun will come up next day. No matter what happened last night. The relentlessness of time, passing as it does, even over masses of dead bodies, under radiant blue skies, is both a blessing and a curse. Time goes on. That is the only certainty there is. Not for everyone, but for those who remain. Its unpredictable, inexorable advance right across the entire world defines the present. No algorithm can fully help us to prepare for the future, through growth and depression, whether economic or healthwise. And so we stumble along, lightheaded and breathless. What we suppress comes back to haunt us.

Even before the virus began to circulate, we had already chosen circulation as our theme for 2020 and the participating artists had already been exploring concepts of circulation in their art. The participating artists keep on going, producing, creating, heading reflectively into each day. They take the light with them and make something of it. No matter what may come – next day. They weave a web of threads between continents and cultures, between past and present, between day and night, banality and dream. They exchange viewpoints, address their counterparts and opponents. They speak with pigeons.

Four examples: Next day the sun came up – but what was Zurich like the day before? Artist Philip Matesic always develops his works in collaboration with exhibition visitors and passers-by. In this instance, he wants to find out, as part of a collective, whether a city such as Zurich has a memory. In doing so, he uses techniques inspired by American author Joe Brainard’s I Remember, unleashing a veritable stream of memory that inexorably sweeps us along, churning memories of our own to the surface. Zurich? Now, that somehow reminds me…

Mayumi Arai is always eight hours ahead of us and far away, while Nina Willimann explores the area around the Helmhaus: time, space and body overlap on encountering the avatar willimannarai. A flesh-and-blood creature speaks to us, here in Zurich. And yet there is a nagging uncertainty about whether or not we are maybe talking to Tokyo after all. Visitors have the opportunity of accompanying the avatar live on walks through the Old Town, through Altstetten, and even through Tokyo’s Ueno district, near the main station, in Zurich.

Mirjam Wirz’s sound system reaches all the way to the ceiling of the exhibition space. The loudspeakers stacked one on top of another blare out fragments of music and voices from Mexico City, which is where the artist began her research project Sonidero City. Following the traces of cumbia music, Mirjam Wirz brings together people’s stories, music, everyday life, the world around us and the knowledge within us, and combines them to form a mosaic of image and text. Her work bears the title Ojos Suaves (Soft Eyes) and her gaze is correspondingly open, seeking some undefined moment in which everything seems possible. Making things possible is also the key to a project involving twenty Zurich artists. During the first wave of the coronavirus, Martin Senn got ten artists to produce a portfolio of ten lithographs in collaboration with Zurich printmaker Thomi Wolfensberger. We liked the idea so much that we would like to continue the project during the second wave with prints by another ten Zurich artists. Lithography is a new medium for all of them. But why not take advantage of these exceptional times by starting something new?

Events (for dates and details, see the enclosed invitation card, and for updates see www.helmhaus.org) Even the sun has a corona. And so, for Next Day The Sun Came Up, our focus is not so much on big events, but more along the lines of direct – and safe – encounters between visitors and artists. Almost all the artists are present from time to time during opening hours. Teresa Pereira will be continuously working on her wall sculpture to create a radiant body, while Ali Al-Fatlawi will be lending form to the memories of visitors. Alicia Velázquez will be reflecting their dreams in drawings and writings, merged with her own dreams, to create a collective dream. The pigeons are always there for Seraina Dür & Jonas Gillmann and the duo will join them now and again, perhaps singing or dancing. Islands expert Silvia Popp produces chairs in her workshop and reflects on transformation, Wassili Widmer lends rhythm to all these spaces – and all sorts of stuff can happen besides – while Guido Vorburger quietly works on his next painting in his studio.

Discussions will continue at the Helmhaus – we hope – beyond the turn of the year. Speakers will be there as ever, with masks of course, to engage with visitors in reflecting on what has been seen, heard or felt. And, as ever, we’ll be announcing three events that will take place at the Helmhaus sooner or later. The book launch relating to the Neu-Oerlikon Performance Series presents a new publication covering a decade of performances in the public space. Edited by Maricruz Peñaloza and published by Amsel-Verlag Zurich, the book not only documents the contributions made by 150 performers from all over the world, but also addresses wider social, political and cultural issues (Thursday, 10 December 2020). How Swiss museums handle Diversity is the question for our panel discussion on Thursday, 14 January 2021. Based on a research project at the Hochschule der Künste Bern, and moderated by cultural scientist Anke Hoffmann, this is an opportunity for the guest panellists and the public to discuss representation, dependency/dependencies and quality with regard to the topic of diversity. Finally, we welcome a guest who has seen the sun come up for nigh on a century: Fritz Senn, Director of the James Joyce Foundation in Zurich and internationally renowned authority on Joyce, will be speaking with Daniel Morgenthaler in our 5 O’Clock Theses series, this time under the Beckettian title The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new (Wednesday, 16 December 2020). And besides: we can all look forward to the curiosity in the eyes of children, and adults too, putting the everyday behind them for an hour or so at the Helmhaus, thanks to the expertly led and thought-provoking Guided Tours – as well as Studio Tables for children.

For further information and visual material, please contact Nathalie Killias, tel. [phone], email: [email protected] Information on the exhibition and visual materials are available for download on our website: helmhaus.org.

[frantasticps]

maandag 20:02

sooo i wrote a fic of how i could have seen the maandag 20:02 clip go; robbe and zoe’s stories getting tied up. you can read it below the read more button, or here at ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21563455

Robbe hadn't been hanging out with Zoë when all that shit with Viktor went down. He heard a little about it here and there, but had never heard a clear story of what had happened. And when he moved in with Zoë, he hadn't asked her about it.

But he had been there when she had gotten the letter to testify. He had been there when Senne found out about that letter and got angry at her, when Zoë had told him that her choice was to not testify. He had been right outside the house when Viktor had come to their door, with no luck of getting in.

Now he is here, with Viktor in their house. Robbe is still standing close to the door as Viktor is talking to Senne and Zoë. And damn, Senne looks terrifying when he is angry and has a knife in his hand.

The situation diffuses pretty fast, but the heavy tension in the air doesn't leave when Viktor does. If Robbe can feel it, he doesn't even doubt that Senne and Zoë are feeling it too. Probably worse than he does. It becomes visible that they do when Zoë tries to kiss Senne and Senne just turns away, storming off towards their room and slamming the door closed.

Robbe doesn't wait long before turning to Zoë and giving her a hug. They may not always appear very close, but Robbe has come to care deeply about Zoë. About everyone living in the flatshare when he comes to think about it. He can almost confidentially say that they feel the same about him too.

After a while Robbe pulls out of the hug and looks at Zoë. "You want to chill in my room? I can make tea, grab some cookies?"

Zoë nods. "Koffiekoeken?"

"You know it."

As Zoë goes into his room, Robbe sighs and walks towards the kitchen. He sees that there are still some dirty dishes left in the sink, but he decides to leave it there for now. He puts on a kettle and goes to the shared cabinet, pulling out a few cookies and putting them on a plate. The water is finished cooking after a few minutes and Robbe pours it into two mugs that he knows are Zoë's favorites. He grabs a few different kinds of tea's, throws everything on a tray and heads to his room.

Zoë is sitting on his bed. She is staring at her hands and fumbling with her thumbs. When she notices Robbe coming in, she stands up and opens the door a bit further so that Robbe can easily get in. He puts the tray on the ground in front of the bed and hands Zoë a mug.

"What tea would you like?" Robbe asks and Zoë points at one with cherries on the satchel. He hands it to her and grabs a forest fruit tea satchel for himself.

They sit together in silence. And while the silence isn't uncomfortable, the need to talk about something hangs in the air between them. Lately, Robbe hasn't been in the mood to fake his happiness, act like everything is okay when it is not. He thinks that Zoë feels the same. But he does want to say something that might help her.

So he does what he never thought that he would do.

"You remember when you saw me in the bathroom, with those bruises?" Robbe starts, getting a lump in his throat. He waits for Zoë to nod before he continues. "Yeah, okay. I told you that it were some guys from college. But uh- it wasn't."

He pauses, giving himself some time to gather his story. He sees Zoë look at him with confusion in her eyes, but she keeps quiet. This is what Robbe likes about Zoë. Even when she is curious, she is patient. She never pushes him, but knows other ways to help him. Like lovingly threatening to drag him to her psychologist.

"I was on a date. With a boy. And after a while we decided to leave, to go to one of our places and-" The lump in his throat feels like it is growing bigger. "-on the way to our bikes, we were kissing. Out of nowhere this group of people showed up and started calling us names. We got to our bikes, but when we tried to cycle away, one of them grabbed my jacket and pulled me to the ground. The guy I was on a date with tried to help me but they got him too. They beat us up in an alley, and left us there afterwards."

Robbe notices that he has his eyes closed when he finishes talking. He can't bring himself to open them, scared to see Zoë's reaction. He isn't sure what he is afraid to see, but he just is.

It's quiet now. Neither of them move or say anything. It feels like forever, but it really can't be more than a minute.

"Have you gone to the police about this?"

Robbe now opens his eyes and shakes his head. "But Viktor coming here, after what he has done to you- him thinking that it is okay to come to your house? It makes me realize that I can't let them get away with this. I think that I should go to the police."

Zoë hums. "You should."

"I also think that you should testify."

He can see the panic grow on Zoë's face as he says that and honestly - Robbe understands.

Robbe doesn't backtrack, but does give her an out. "But you don't have to, if you don't want. No matter your reasons. And I know you didn't ask for my opinion about it, but I did want to let you know what I think about it."

"I will testify," Zoë says, her voice shaking slightly. "If you go the police."

Robbe nods, a small smile forming on his face. "Will you come with me?"

"Only if you also come with me."

#wtfock #robbe ijzermans #zoe loockx #senne de smet #trigger warning mentioned assault #trigger warning assault #trigger warning assault scene #viktor is also mentioned and very hated #enjoy

[hopetofantasy]

Culture, parallels & meta - S2 E1

Previous season Prologue

°

Maandag 20:25

The ambiguity of this clip, showing us Zoë’s POV as well as Robbe’s, was intentional. Unfortunately, wtFOCK decided to queer bait us at that time. Their banner on their website even portrayed Robbe as S2 main, before the release of the second clip. 

C is for culture: 

"I collected your favorite easter eggs" - During Easter, it’s a tradition for children to search for chocolate eggs hidden 'by the Easter Bunny’ or ‘the Roman Easter Clocks who flew over’ in the gardens of (grand)parents. This is usually followed by a brunch with the family. During the weeks before, friends/colleagues might gift others mini flavored chocolate eggs, with praliné, pistachio, marzipan, mokka, ... 

"I’m looking forward to it" - It’s back to school time in this episode. They just had two weeks of Easter break, which is situated somewhere in April - depending on the date of that religious day. They also have this Monday off, since it’s Easter Monday.

They just came out of the ‘Wasbar’ (= laundromat bar). Still a relatively new concept, but slowly gaining more and more popularity in the cities. These types of bars are perfect for students, tourists or locals, who love to eat or drink something, while waiting for their laundry. At some locations, they even organize concerts and events. 

Hello from the outside: Right before the release of this clip, a Belgian influencer filmed Jana and Zoë in 'De Wasbar', at ‘the same time as he was there’. He acted all excited and tagged the characters insta’s.

Where’s Wally: We kinda forgot about Robbe’s first girlfriend, Maud. Whoops!

Oop, there it is, the homophobia / heteronormativity: Robbe immediately stopping his girlfriend from going further than just making-out and deflecting the question about going to his house. 

Nod to the OG: Robbe saying "Hell and damnation" about his mother being angry. This is a subtle hint towards the religion obsession of Isak’s mom, a storyline wtFOCK never truly explored in S3.

Perfect parallels: Robbe’s "Can’t we go to your house?" with Maud’s "Or to yours?" in S2 and Sander saying "At my place or yours?" in S3.

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Jana has the same phone case from S1 (the birdies!).

°

Dinsdag 08:25

C is for culture: 

"No, just porno" - More than half of Belgian teens don’t watch porn. Those who do, are mainly men, but a surprising 2 out of 5 female teens also like to explore. Though, this development has a huge impact on the average age to start sex: teens are waiting longer and longer to have their first time, due to insecurities formed by these types of images.

"Bedankt für die blumen" - A phrase the Pope uses every year during Easter in the ‘Urbi et orbi’ to thank the Dutch flower suppliers. This is used as a joke a lot by Dutch and Belgian people, because of the way the former Pope pronounced the phrase so weirdly. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Robbe was wearing his oriental vibe t-shirt from S3. Yasmina pulls off her hijab at the entrance, due to the school’s policy.

°

Dinsdag 12:52

C is for culture: "Vijgen na Pasen" (= figs after Easter) - This expression for ‘a solution that's too late to have purpose’, comes from the former fasting ritual before Easter. Back then the only sweet thing people were allowed to eat were figs. But the import didn’t always run smoothly. So they sometimes arrived after Easter, which was too late, thus defeating the whole purpose. 

Perfect parallel: An annoyed Zoë asking Senne “What’s your plan?” in S2, a happy Sander asking Robbe the same in S3. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Luca is throwing very annoyed glares towards the two lovebirds, Robbe and Maud. According to the FreeFest poll, ‘Beam Team’ is at nr. 1, ‘Blonde Ambition’ (Britt’s group) is at nr. 2 and their team - called ‘GRL PWR’ - is at three. 

°

Woensdag 18:21

Perfect parallel / Funny coincidence: Milan having sexual acts in the same room as Sobbe's reunion later on, both accompanied by a song of a LGBT+ singer. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Each shelf has a name label and they’re all filled with products by 'Colruyt' (a discount store). Milan’s one is almost empty, due to his money issues and Lisa’s has a gluten-free product with a post-it ‘mine’ on it.

°

Woensdag 19:42

C is for culture: The girls and Jens are going to a concert of ‘blackwave.’ - an Antwerp hiphop duo, who’ve gotten more attention due to their hit single ‘Elusive’ ft. David Ngyah. Their style is rather funky with oldschool influences. 

Hello from the outside: The hiphop duo (mentioned above) actually did have a real concert on that exact Wednesday 24th of April 2019 in ‘De Roma’ Antwerp. The actors went to this, put videos on their characters’ insta and made some pictures with fans who spotted them in real life. 

Perfect parallel: Amber sending a topless pic to Senne and him screenshotting it in S1, the beat girl doing the same and Jana encouraging Jens to screenshot in S2. Also, Zoë stating they don’t have permission to see this, foreshadowing Viktor taking nude pics of her without permission. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it: Look at these adorable pics with girlssquad and Robbe! 

°

Donderdag 12:53

Perfect parallel: Amber thanking the girls “You were there for me” in S1, her saying “All four of us are there for you” to Zoë in S2.

Nod to the OG:

°

Vrijdag 20:42

Perfect parallel: Jana saying to Amber that if someone spills a drink, her dress will be ruined in S2, Aaron actually spilling and ruining her dress in S3. 

Blink-and-y’ll-miss-it / Oopsie: The candle letters behind Zoë says ‘Hapyp Days’ instead of ‘Happy Days’.

#wtfock #wtfam #cpm rewatch #skam belgium #skam

[originalmajestic]

Honestly hadn’t sat down to do real critical listening with the echobox traveler IEMs until now and like, yeah they still don’t suit my preferences in terms of frequency response/balance bc I really fell hard for the midrangey Senn sound, but I’m pretty convinced people were happy with these at the $90 original price point and I paid closer to $20 for them so that was an absolute steal.

[lena-haloways]

Couple tag game

Thanks again to @skameverything for the tag! 

Rules: answer this 20 questions and then tag as many other people as you want

Couple: Zoenne

1. When did you start to ship them? I shipped them from s1, especially since the “seppe” scene and now after s2 they own my heart

2. How much do you ship them 1-10? 100000000..

3. Why do you ship them? They’re just so cute and hot at the same time, the way they love each other, they would literally do everything for one another, and both of them are amazing characters, senne is one of my faves ever, the way he is with zoë is incredible ahh babies 💕

4. My opinion: I don’t like them / they’re meh / they’re okay / I like them / I love them / I’m obssesed / they own my heart / they’re my otp

5. Favorite scene? I love EVERY SCENE of them, choosing is so hard, but I have to say morning after the panic attack scene. Like that is the cutest thing ever, pure love and a perfection

6. Favorite quote? “Zoë, I fully support you.” ugh senne owns my heart

7. Favorite social media post? Their first posts of each other, we didn't expect to be blessed like that and they are the first noorhelm to go official that early and I appreciate wtfock because of that sm

8. An underrated moment of them? I never know if anything is underrated hahah but I just remembered the car scene where they say ‘I love you’ for the first time and that scene is actually so nice, I love how caring is senne there offering to revise formulas again, wishing her luck, saying that he loves and even that cute little interaction later in the school hallway

9. The most hartbreaking moment? Senne finding out. I remember how they turned hell week into two weeks and I just wanted it to happen already thinking I would be ready and I wasn’t. It broke my heart for both senne and zoë and hearing her cry at the end of the scene was just too much for me to handle

10. Funniest moment? Probably s1 extra original scene in ep12 when zoë offends him and senne turns that into a flirt ohh forever grateful for that scene

11. The song that reminds you the most of them? Nightcall, like they own that song since it was used twice, for their first kiss and the reunion 

12. Favorite change they made from the og? Making senne escorting zoë to the police station and encourage her to report him like that! scene! is! so! important! Also, senne moving in with zoë instead of london!

13. A change from the og you didn’t like? I’m forever bitter we didn’t get a singing scene, I wanted that sm :(

14. Something you wish to see from them? More domestic moments!! Living together!! Moving in day!!

15. Favorite moment in s1? Ep12 scene in the school hallway

16. Favorite moment in s2? Honestly all of them but I'll write some. Them laying in the grass being all in love, senne opening up to zoë, saying he can't be without her anymore and then tickling her is just a perfection. Zoë giving senne the key of her apartment is the cutest ever, they were finally so happy. Him finding his blanket in her room and her saying 'busted' I loved that moment sm

17. What do you love the most about them? Their patience and support and just in general their love and chemistry

18. What do you miss the most about them? Everything, I literally miss everything about them

19. Any headcanons? Sooo many ugh but right now I just want that singing scene!!

20. Random thought about them? Where can I find a Senne?

I tag @exo-neukdae-minyeo @wtfocklvr @lemonnougat​ @lalleloockx @miasmoak 

#zoenne #wtfock #tag game #tagged

[wtfocklvr]

Thank u @hugunderthestars <3

Rules: answer these 20 questions and then tag as many other people as you want

Naturally I’m going to do Zoenne <3<3

1. When did you start to ship them? Since wtFOCK first started because I fall in love with every Noorhelm!

2. How much do you ship them 1-10? A Million

3. Why do you ship them? They're so in love and I love it. Senne is literally a little puppy dog in front of Zoë and it’s adorable. They have insane chemistry and they were both there for each other when they were vulnerable.

4. My opinion: OTP ENDGAME LOVES OF MY LIFE OWN MY HEART FOREVER AND EVER

5. Favourite scene? My favourite scene is when Zoë receives the “nothing happened” text from Viktor and runs to Senne.

6. Favorite quote? Iconic: “Zeker als die al vol zit met jou” shbdjwbehjwbshnas I LOVE THAT SOOOOO MUCH

7. Favorite social media post? “Smoelentrekker” and “My Happy Place” because they were so happy that day!

8. An underrated moment of them? I don’t know if it’s underrated but like can we talk about the passion and emotion in my favourite scene. Likeeee the running to him and dragging him into a classroom.

9. The most heartbreaking moment? Senne confronting Zoë, obviously...

10. Funniest moment? When Senne finds his blanket, that Zoë took, on her bed.

11. The song that reminds you the most of them? ahhhhhhh there’s so many so: Someone to Stay - Vancouver Sleep Clinic, Always - Gavin James, Nightcall - London Grammar, You’re Mine - Oscar and the Wolf, Big Jet Plane - Angus & Julia Stone

12. Favourite change they made from the og? Okay obviously Senne taking Zoë to the police station but I also liked the way they did Zoë’s interaction with Gill.

13. A change from the og you didn’t like? Would’ve loved an “I know what you’re playing other than girls” line from Zoë

14. Something you wish to see from them? Honestly anything! They’re adorable.

15. Favourite moment in s1? Zoë confronting Senne after he’s rude to Amber

16. Favourite moment in s2? Haaaaaaa I keep going back to this but their reunion at school. Also, the last scene and, of course, their reunion when Senne’s going to leave

17. What do you love the most about them? They’re both just generally morally right people and I love how they’ve both supported each other.

18. What do you miss the most about them? THEM. JUST THEM. So basically EVERYTHING :) Honestly barely coping without them.

19. Any headcanons? Idk just anything where they’re being cute

20. Random thought about them? CAN I HAVE A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THEIRS ONE DAY? and also can a Senne come into my life right now? But actually though my random thought is that Zoë, Jana, Robbe, Amber etc are all the same age as me! Like we’re in the same school year and it’s so strange because they seem so much older. I can’t imagine having such a serious relationship right now.

@emptytattooss @itsallaskam @edonori @gendryaisendgame @lackofadrenaline

#wtfock #zoenne