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#harley keener

Peter: Do you think lava would taste spicy?
Tony: Please do not eat lava. 
Harley: Actually, since lava is really just molten earth, it probably tastes bland and dusty. 
Peter: You are the only one here who understands me. 
Tony: *facepalms*

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Us, The Martians
Chapter One

Read on AO3.

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

“So can you tell me what you’ve got inside?
Well is it all those fears that you hide?
‘Cause it’s all messed up now in my mind

Tell me how you think you’d find
Your uninhabited piece of mind

You always gotta pray for the pessimist
And these days seem the strangest existence
Now make way and obey all the best of us
Before they just eat you alive…”

~Eat You Alive - Sum 41

- ~ - ~ - ~ - ~

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me? writing a daemon au that no one asked for? it’s more likely than you think 

“You know what May always says,” Cyrene, silent up until now, says from her place on his knee. “Best to rip the band-aid off.”

“I’m Spider-Man.”

“You’re what.”

Peter chances a glance up and both Harley and Samir are staring at him, ice-blue and burning fire, piercing in equally different ways.

He can hear the wince in Cyrene’s voice. “Peter, maybe not like that.”

“You just said—”

“I know, but—”

Cyrene,” comes Samir’s darker river-like cadence, but Peter can’t look away from Harley, his face pale and face closed off.  There’s a flash of something across his bright eyes that has Peter scrambling across the couch, dislodging Cyrene off his knee abruptly and throwing his arms around Harley’s shoulders.

Keep reading

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Stephen: I wrote down all the plans we shouldn’t try again.
Christine: *reading* ‘Tony tries to seduce someone then starts crying on command’.
Stephen: It works like a charm, but makes everyone uncomfortable.
Christine: ‘Peter improvises a breakdancing number’, ‘Pepper pretends to be a school counselor’.
Christine: ‘Tony jumping down a building, again’, underlined. ‘Pineapple’.
Christine: This just reads ‘Throw Harley at enemies like a cat’.
Stephen: Oh no, that one works every time. Put it in the ‘to do’ pile.
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Alpha! Harley Keener x reader head canon.

Before we begin, this is a alpha! Harley Keener head canon and both, Harley and reader are adults. It has a bit about sex and about being insecure and abandonment issues. The reader is gender neutral and also, the a/b/o dynamic is not mentioned, so everyone can enjoy it. Also, there’s no claiming or bonding bite in this AU head canon.

  • Harley will most probably be a-not-so aggressive or dominating Alpha.
  • He will be protective of you and at times, a little possessive.
  • He has abandonment issues so you always comfort him when he is upset.
  • He will be insecure from time to time and will think that he is not the right mate for you. But you always reassure him that you only want him.
  • He loves cuddling.
  • If he wants to cuddle with you then there’s no way you can deny his request.
  • His favorite position would most definitely be where he’s right on top of you and his face is by your neck. Close to your scent glands.
  • Will kiss your neck before falling asleep as a way to say ‘I love you ’ and/or 'good night ’.
  • He will always scent you before you go to work or anywhere without him so that everyone knows that you are his.
  • He will do this by hugging you or by kissing your scent glands.
  • Will get upset even if he faintly smells someone else’s scent on you.
  • Harley also happens to be the kind of guy who is not ashamed of being jealous.
  • He is always holding or touching you in a protective way. You don’t mind it at all.
  • Growls at anyone who is eyeing you but doesn’t get aggressive.
  • During ruts, he tends to get aggressive easily and very possessive. It’s not like he can help it.
  • You help him during ruts and his helps you during your ruts/heats.
  • He tries to be as gentle as possible with you during sex.
  • Lots of kisses and cuddles after that.
  • The kisses are usually slow and soft.

That’s all I could think of. I hope you all enjoyed it!

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Day 28:  “what are you gonna do, huh? curse me again? i’ve spent the last three centuries with you, there’s nothing left for you to threaten me with.”


Curses and Spells

For: Parkour

Ao3 Link:


Harley Keener was letting Peter Parker stay with him as the man helped around his house. It was a nice place in New York. Harley had a crush on the boy. Something that was dangerous. Harley had made it through the witch trials in Salem, he ended up fleeing to New York where he meets the young man. Peter was clumsy at best. Harley figured he could keep him around a few years and replace him but he was now in love with the boy. Peter was walking around the room complaining to Harley’s newest visitor about how he and Harley wouldn’t clean up his mess when he tripped and knocked over a priceless vase. Peter looked at Harley nervous. 

“It was an accident, Sir Keener,” the boy said. Harley debated on what to do as he shooed the visitor away. He dragged Peter into a room and tied up the boy as he looked for the spell that he used back all those five hundred years ago. 

“There it is,” Harley said with a grin before he faced the boy. “Et ut hoc illum virum iuvenale, nunquam germinare senior in diem animam suam.” The red glow covered the boy as he looked at the other one surprised. Harley smiled as Peter looked at him scared of Harley all of a sudden. When the glow went away, Harley put the book away. 

“What did you do to me?” Peter asked.

“You will always be mine now,” Harley said with a grin. Peter gulped as Harley went for another book and grinned. “Sic capiuntur Iungo animas saecula saeculorum.” A blue glow came around the boy as he looked nervously at Harley. Harley just smiled.

“What did that do?” Peter asked. Harley just looked at Peter with a smile.

“That keeps you connected to me for life. You will be my servant for eternity,” Harley said as he smiled. “If you try to have me killed you will die as well. So don’t try anything stupid, pretty boy.” Peter turned pale as he nodded. A servant to a witch was the price for breaking a priceless vase. He should have known. Harley loosened the ropes around Peter before he pulled the boy out of the room and told him to clean up the vase. Peter did what he was told. He rather not be cursed again. 

Keep reading

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“Raspberries are better, duh!”

Harley glanced at the clock and then back at the little Alpha sitting on his knee, finger painting a picture of a red and blue flower. “Benny, did your daddy say that he was gonna be late?”

“Nope!” the pup chirped, then looked up at him with a furrowed brow. “But he did say we were gonna get ice cream with Peepaw Tony after school, so I really don’t want him to be any later or else it’ll be too late, and daddy won’t let me get two scoops, only one- cause he says it’ll ruin my appetite if I eat two scoops past six cause after six comes seven and seven is dinner time!”

“Seven is dinner time?” Harley asked, fondness creeping into his voice. Benny was probably the pup in his class that was most prone to rambling, and every time he did the Omega’s heart melted slightly. It made him wanna call his mom and ask her how she didn’t spontaneously combust when he and Abbie were younger and chattered on and on for hours. “Do you get ice cream after dinner too?”

Benny shook his head, eyes wide. “No! That’s not ice cream time cause I get to hy-hyper, but my dad will let me have some fruits and whipped cream. I love strawberries a lot- like so so much- but my favorite are peaches! Daddy’s favorites are blackberries but I think blackberries are yucky, Mr. Harley, they’ve just got so many seeds! I think they’d be a lot less yucky if they were just the sweet parts.”

“You’re completely right Benny, blackberries are yucky with the seeds.” Harley tapped his chin in a thinking motion. “But I bet you like raspberries.”

“I love raspberries so much!”

“And what’s the difference between raspberries and blackberries?”

Read the Rest of Late Afternoons here! 

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Harley: Aren’t you a little young to drink?

Stephen: What??? How old do you think I am???

Harley: Idk -27

Stephen: No guessing negative numbers

Harley: 98^0

Peter: √(−1)?


Peter: a^2+b^2=c^2

Harley: π

Peter: φ

Harley: sin(θ)


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Tony: So you guys have anything interesting to say
Harley: Kids fundraisers are basically baby's first pyramid scheme
Stephen: .....
Tony: Harley did you get scammed?
Harley: Yes all throughout middle school! I sold 400 chocolate bars and never got my limo ride >:'/
Peter: Dude I sold 12 chocolate bars and I didn't even get my laser pointer keychain
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I really can’t get this out of my head.


Vision: Tony, are you my Grandpa?

Tony: *looks offended* I’m too young to have a grandson who look as old as you.

Vision: I know I’m a child of JARVIS.

Tony: *confused* huh?

Vision: JARVIS have a disastrous one night stand and died giving birth to me. You, DR Banner & DR Cho help birthed me.

Tony: *face-palming* That… That is true but without context. Who gives you that idea?

Vision: Harley & Peter.

Tony: *resigned* of course it’s them.


I keep thinking that Tony would just be resigned that at the age 40(?) He already have a grandson due to Harley & Peter’s (sons in all that matters) antics. Vision also like that idea since he knows that all of Tony’s creations are his children.

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Starks and Stars  @stenaliburtenli

:thinking emoji: :thinking emoji: :thinking emoji: well well well where has @/hpotato gone? Seems he’s disappeared from social media after stealing the attention of our Peter. :thinking emoji: :thinking emoji: :thinking emoji:  Peter Stark fans, find out more for us please.

2.3k retweets and comments    4k likes


[A very blurry image of a hospital room, where Harley Keener is laying in a hospital bed. No one can see his face, but it’s clearly the same boy that’s been appearing in Peter, Ned, and Harry’s photos and live streams.  Doctors are swarming him, but the photo is too blurry to make out why.]

Peter Stark Notice Me @P.StarkSuperFan

Ding dong,,,, the witch is dead,,,,

5.3k retweets and comments   6k likes


Sage the Sage @chocomoruki

holy fuck this is so fucked up, what the fuck is WRONG with you?!

2.3k retweets and comments   6k likes

When Harley was younger- back when he’d gotten first diagnosed- he’d always been confused when he woke up in a hospital bed. His mom would always be holding his hand, clutching it tightly, and occasionally whispering a prayer, and his aunt Peggy would be comforting them both softly. She was always good like that. As he got a little older, and waking up in a hospital bed became the norm for him, that confusion never went away. Instead, he could always tell when he was in a hospital bed because his mom or his aunt Peg would be clutching at his hand hard enough to break it.

Waking up this time was absolutely no different.

He woke up like he always did, slightly groggy, his throat dry. The good thing was that he clearly hadn’t been out for more than a week because he didn’t have a breathing tube down his throat this time. The bad thing was that he had a killer headache that made him wince at even the thought of opening his eyes. He knew he needed to, though. It never ever got better unless he voiced that he was awake and alive and could he please get some water. From there, he could work out what had happened and what he had to look forward to.

Opening his eyes, Harley winced at the lights, and realized that those lights weren’t the ceiling lights, but rather the window of his unit. He struggled to breathe for a second as he got his barings, shifting his head to the side without Peggy, only to find that he was wrong.

Next to the window, Peggy, Steve, and Bucky all rested against each other, eyes closed, slumped in that order. Peggy was leaning on Steve and for- well not the first time, but one of the rare times- in Harley’s life, she looked less than perfect. Her hair was frizzed and uncurled, instead coming down in her natural waves that looked tangled and unbrushed. Tear tracks still stained her cheeks, and she was just wearing a sweatshirt- he would’ve done a double take if he thought his head could handle it, because he was ninety eight percent sure it was Steve’s sweatshirt- and sweatpants. Steve was leaning on her and looked just about the same. Bucky was slumped onto Steve, bags under his eyes and a five o’clock shadow beginning to sprout.

Huh. If Peggy was over there, then the person holding his hand must be…

Peter had pressed himself as physically close to the bed as possible, clutching at his hand like it was a life line.

Read chapter Eight Here!

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Apologizes for any messes up in advance. 

Finding Yourself

Peter was unsure at first about their gender. He/Him didn’t work but neither did she/her. It took a talk with Betty to figure out that they preferred they/them. Actually, it took a few talks with Betty, but they were awesome about helping Peter figure out that Peter preferred they/them. They didn’t know how to tell their boyfriends though. Like they loved them but Peter didn’t know how to explain to them that Peter was now nonbinary. They didn’t want to just spring it on them worried they might leave Peter. Peter loved them too much to lose them but Peter figured it was either tell them the truth or live with the wrong pronouns. Peter knew what they had to do. They were ready to move on with letting Johnny, Harley, and Harry know the truth about them. Besides, their boyfriends loved them. If they couldn’t accept Peter then the relationship was not going to work. 


They were sitting around at dinner goofing off when Peter figured they should bring it up to them. Peter went to say something when Harley asked them if they liked their food.

“It was okay,” Peter said.

“Just okay?” Johnny asked worriedly.

“Pete, is something up?” Harry asked. Peter panicked. How was they supposed to tell their boyfriends about this without them leaving Peter?

“I-” Peter tried to say before freezing up again. Harley, Harry, and Johnny were concerned now. 

“You can tell us anything?” Harry said. Peter looked down. They might as well tell the three boys.

“I’m nonbinary,” Peter said. The other three looked at them smiling.

“I’m glad that you could tell us this,” Harley said. “So what do we need to know?”

“You aren’t going to leave me?” Peter asked. The three boys looked taken back. 

“Leave you?” Johnny asked, concerned. “Why would we leave you, Petey Pie?” 

“I’m not the same person you agreed to date,” Peter said.

“Yes, you are. You just changed one thing but you have always been the same person,” Harry said. Peter looked at them all surprised by their reactions.

“Can I hug you?” Harley asked. Peter nodded and before they knew it the other two were hugging them as well. Peter felt safe in their boyfriends arms knowing that they were loved. 

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