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#harper row
incorrectbatfam · 1 day
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I saw Ur post on how Steph would eat up foodtok (pun intended) but why stop at Steph?
What would Damian post? Why animal abusers should be locked up? Dick would upload a low quality video of himself doing an insane parkour trick and get 14m views meanwhile Jason's in the corner raging cuz he posted his workout routine and he doesn't get half as many as Dick did
Tim would post videos on how to subdue annoying younger siblings and Bruce and Alfred would be in the background looking concerned
Cass gives ASL tuts and Barbara likes every video
POV scrolling through your FYP as a Gothamite
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dctable · 2 days
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Batfam 5th Dimension names?
Bruce: Brss Dick: Dyx Jason: Jsn Kathy: Kty Alfred: Lfrd Tim: Tym Barbara Gordon: Brrbrhgwrdyn Harper Row: Rprrw Bertinelli: Brrtynlly Jean-Paul Valley: Jynpwlvlly Luke Fox: Lywkfwx Duke Thomas: Dywkthwmst Cassandra: Ksndrh Stephanie Brown: Stphnybrwn
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Reblog this one too or you hate women☝🏼💜🖤💙
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vodrae · 5 months
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Rich pregnant socialite: So we went to this clinic and let them manipulate our genes so we're 100% sure our child won't have any disease, he will have my hair and his father eyes and so much things we did for him! And you Bruce ?
Brucie: Found em in the trash. Except Tim, he found me in the trash.
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yesiknowimshort · 1 year
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to keep up appearances, bruce asked the batkids to find reasons to excuse their various bumps and bruises:
dick was easy. gymnastics and acrobatics run deep within his veins and it’s always his “party trick”, so they just let the public come up with an answer themselves.
jason, mysterious as he is, never addressed his bumps and bruises. the public have settled on underground cage fighting.
tim’s was skateboarding and being “himself”. tim knows how he appears to the public, and as much as it pains his ego for people to see him in such a way, clumsiness fit his charming, dorky, public persona.
damian needs no excuse as he is a ‘rambunctious little ankle biter’, so bruce just lets damian straight up tell people shit like “i was engaged in battle with a duel wielding madman” and then says “kids and their wild imaginations, amiright?”.
steph insisted on fencing even though bruce argued that she would not realistically get many black eyes from fencing. she just tells people she’s very bad at it.
cass’ are from ballet duets.
duke just says “there was a spider” with no further context.
harper’s go to line is “you should see the other guy”.
and bruce is basically barbie so he comes up with a new sport each time he’s asked. and people believe it every goddamn time without question; because what else would a billionaire do with their time other than unicycle hockey and chess boxing?
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monnashi · 10 months
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Protectors and knight
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reineydraws · 1 year
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🌇 dinner atop a skyscraper 🌆
(bruce and luke both spotted the drone babs sent up to take a photo of them haha)
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thedevilundercover · 3 months
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the bat kids should have a very fucked up trivia game that they’ve made up but it’s just photos of various wounds and they have to guess what caused it
Someone started it as a way to learn all the types of wounds that happen bc of each weapon with some Flash Cards From Hell but since then they’ve made an actual game
they play it every game night and Tim is very smug about his streak of three fucking years and everyone else thinks that he’s either a psychopath or just very into weapons. Jason wants to beat him up either way
every time they start playing Bruce starts shaking his head tiredly bc of the bat kids’ bullshit. (He’s a fucking hypocrite, he’s done shit just as fucked up. Karma’s a bitch, Bruce)
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waterfire1848 · 1 year
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[ The Batfamily out at a stand up comedy event in Metropolis. ]
Comedian: Where are you all from?
Bruce: Gotham.
Comedian: I’m sorry.
Bruce, a little louder: Gotham.
Comedian: No, I heard. I’m just sorry.
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incorrectbatfam · 27 days
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How small must the world be for both Bruce and Tim to witness John and Mary Grayson's deaths
Or for 10-year-old Duke to crack the Riddler's puzzle before Batman swoops in and saves the day, long before his powers came into play
Or for Sheila Haywood to leave her son only to end up assisting his killer a decade and a half later
Not to mention the popular fanon concept of Jason knowing baby Damian in the League of Assassins
Now imagine how many other invisible strings could've tied them together
Like what if Tim and Jason went to the same school when Jason was Robin but all they shared was the occasional bump and "excuse me" in the busy halls
Or what if Babs was a tutor and helped an elementary-aged Steph finally understand her homework only for the Browns to cancel after a couple sessions because they couldn't afford it
What if the first person to buy Cass a hot meal was Kate on one of her travels
What if Alfred witnessed young Selina shoplifting groceries but chose to turn a blind eye
What if Jason lived on the same streets as the Row siblings and gave little Harper tips on how to use tools and defend her brother
What if Steph and Duke shared the same school bus, only he sat in the front while she was toward the back
What if the first person to teach Tim how to tie his shoes was Bruce at a gala because Jack and Janet were busy talking to someone important
What if Bette did a DNA test for fun and found a connection in Nanda Parbat but just assumed the results was faulty because she knew her whole family, right?
What if 8-year-old Dick, the day before his parents died, stayed at a cheap hotel near Crime Alley and found 4-year-old Jason wandering alone and said, "I'll be your big brother for tonight"
What if the universe knew they were made for each other and wouldn't rest until they realized it too
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graypark214 · 1 year
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antygabo14 · 1 year
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Batfamily portrait
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What if This, but like, Batfam?
Bruce runs a free non profit charity truck stop to feed the hungry and homeless and then all of a sudden there are these kids who are looking to help the community and want to make the world better despite having nothing and shit. Guess he’s a father now.
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celaenaeiln · 7 months
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headcanon
The batfamily - Dick, Bruce, Jason, Tim, Damian, Steph, Duke, Cass, and Harper - knee deep in mud all tired, filthy, sweaty, and super mad, digging up the front yard because Jason buried the body of a mob lord in front of wayne manor years ago to piss off bruce but forgot where he buried it and now the city wants to pipeline maintenance work there.
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vodrae · 6 days
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I love the running joke of the Batkids getting a new sibling everytime they're out of town.
But imagine Damian or Duke, you are an only child and suddendly your closest circle goes from 1 or 2 people to ELEVEN (according to wikis)
Baby Damian, fed stories about his batdad all his life, you know he lives with his butler and that kid in bight colors.
AND THEN
"Everyone, this is my and Talia's son, you know we were married. Damian, this is Dick, Barbara, Helena,Jason, Tim, Stephanie, Cassandra, she's mute, Harper, my cousin Kate, and you already met Alfred."
First of all, you're pretty sure you have already met the biggest with the red hoodie, and second, WTF ?
In addition, their SO are dying to meet you and then Bruce has the audacity to die and leaves you with the gymnast. Time to adopt a turkey.
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yuriinadress · 11 months
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DC Pride 2023 #1 pin-up by Brandt & Stein - "Youth Center"
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