Fred Weasley Incorrect quote:
Fred Pretending to faint:
You: Fred! Fred! Are you okay?
Fred, whispering: You gotta kiss him to wake him up.
You: What? I'm not gonna kiss you.
Fred: Fred can't hear you, he's not awake. Only a kiss will wake him up.
You: Oh, I better call Dumbledore.
Fred, suddenly waking up: Oh, oh! Where am I? Wha-
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Draco: I'd walk through fire for my friends
Y/n: Aw, that's so swe-
Draco: Well, not fire because it's dangerous, but a super humid room
Y/n:
Draco: But not too humid, my hair
Y/n: *shaking her head* what am i going to do with you?
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Fred Dating a Ravenclaw!Reader
(Y/N): Fred, I have such an immense infatuation with you, it surmounts the most embellished wonders of our nature. I can undoubtedly proclaim that I have an unequivocal, inexorable amorous fondness for you.
Fred: ...
Fred: ...what?
(Y/N) *sigh*: I love you to the moon and back.
Fred: Aww, babe, I love you to the moon and back, too.
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Slytherin: Hufflepuff, iiiiiiiii have a question.
Hufflepuff: Ask Ravenclaw leaves
Slytherin: This is specifically to you.
Hufflepuff: OH! comes back
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*James, bringing Regulus home to meet his parents*
Regulus, seeing Monty and realizing James will always be hot no matter his age: thank the lord
Effie, seeing the same look she had when she met Monty’s parents for the first time: amen
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Barty: You slept with Potter?
Regulus: I didn’t know what else to do! He had those big, sad eyes. I couldn’t help it!
Evan: ���sure, sounds like you had no other choice
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Falling asleep in the dorms…
“Sirius?”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t think I like Evans anymore.”
“Shit mate, took you long enough.”
“Heh. Yeah.”
…
“Sirius?”
“Yeah, Prongs?”
“I might like boys. Also. Like as well as girls.”
“Join the club, Prongs. Just stay the fuck away from Moony.”
“Noted.”
…
“Sirius?”
“Yeah, mate?”
“What if I like a particular bloke?”
“…it’s not me, is it? Because Moony would probably kill you.”
“No.”
….
“Sirius?”
“Yes, Prongs?”
“It’s your brother.”
“I know.”
“You know?”
“Yeah, I was just fucking with you before.”
“Right.”
…
“Sirius?”
“Yes Prongs?”
“That’s…it’s okay?”
“Yes, James. I’d rather it be you than anyone else, to be honest.”
“Alright.”
…
“Sirius?”
“Go the fuck to sleep, Prongs. We’ll come up with a plan to woo him tomorrow.”
“Alright.”
….
“James?”
“What’s up, Padfoot?”
“Take care of him, alright?”
“…..yeah. Yeah, of course.”
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walburga: you’re not good enough for my son
remus: you’re not good enough for your son
walburga: excuse me?
remus: you heard me.
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*The Balck brothers speaking French*
James: *Literally melts on the spot and finds it extremely hot*
Remus: Shut the fuck up, I don't speak croissant.
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Marauders raising Harry:
Lily: I have put a charm on my house and James and regulus’ house so that you won’t be able to swear in front of Harry anymore
Sirius: this is tyranny
Remus: we have rights
James: all we are asking is that you don’t swear in front of our 4 year old
Sirius: I would never-
Regulus: that’s a bold-faced lie
Sirius: how do we know this charm is real
James: try it
Sirius: Fork- god ham it
Remus: here let me try
Remus: #%#*%#*%#
Sirius: HA
Lily: *groans*
Regulus: HOW DO YOU KNOW MORE SWEARS THAN MAGIC ITSELF
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Me: *gets periods* *sighs*
Also me: *searches x reader period fics on Tumblr/ao3*
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Dumbledore: I hope you two have an explanation for this
Sirius: We have three, actually
Y/n: Pick your favorite
Requests are open!
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Y/N: I have a crush on Fred.
George: *gasp*
George: Why am I gasping? I knew that already.
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James: We need to talk about your mental health.
Regulus, trying to change the subject: Actually, what I need is to be dicked down right now.
James:
Regulus:
James, removing his tie: You know, one of these days that isn't going to work-
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James: and so I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Reg-
Evan: I'm sorry?
James: Well hes-
Evan: No I'm just sorry.
Barty: yeah mate praying for you
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Remus: Right hand blue
James: This Twister game is so fun!
Regulus: Not that fun. Are you sure this is right, Remus? Potter is practically on top of me
Remus: Of course it is!
Sirius, whispers: Is it?
Remus: I haven’t used the spinner in half an hour
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