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#hate music last time delete
magpiefrankie · 9 months
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How is RUIN still as glitchy as the first game like come on guys 😭😭
The functionality of this game really isn't helped by the fact that it just crashes every few times I get jumpscared
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0sbrain · 10 months
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here's a list of mozilla add-ons for all of you tumblrinas out there to have a better internet experience
also, if you like my post, please reblog it. Tumblr hates links but i had to put them so you adhd bitches actually download them <3 i know because i am also adhd bitches
BASIC STUFF:
AdGuard AdBlocker / uBlock Origin : adguard is a basic adblock and with origin you can also block any other element you want. for example i got rid of the shop menu on tumblr
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Privacy Badger : this add on will block trackers. if an element contains a tracker it will give you the option to use it or not
Shinigami Eyes: this will highlight transphobic and trans friendly users and sites using different colors by using a moderated database. perfect to avoid terfs on any social media. i will explain how to use this and other add-ons on android as well under the read more cut
THINGS YOU TUMBLINAS WANT:
Xkit: the best tumblr related add on. with many customizable options, xkit not only enhances your experience from a visual standpoint, but provides some much needed accessibility tools
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bonus: if you are into tf2 and wanna be a cool cat, you can also get the old version to add cool reblog icons
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AO3 enhancer: some basic enhancements including reading time and the ability to block authors and tags
YOUTUBE
Return of the YouTube Dislike : pretty self explanatory
Youtube non-stop: gets rid of the annoying "Video paused. Continue watching?" popup when you have a video in the background
SponsorBlock: gives you options to skip either automatically or manually sponsors, videoclip non music sectors and discloses other type of sponsorships/paid partnerships
Enhancer for YouTube: adds some useful options such as custom play speed, let's you play videos in a window and most important of all, it allows you to make the youtube interface as ugly as your heart desires. I can't show a full image of what it looks like because i've been told its eye strainy and i want this post to be accessible but look at this <3
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PocketTube: allows you to organize your subscriptions into groups
YouTube Comment Search: what it says
FINDING STUFF
WayBack Machine: you probably know about this site and definitely should get the add on. this allows you to save pages and access older versions with the click of a button. while you can search wayback using web archives, please get this one as well as it allows you to easily save pages and contribute to the archive.
Web Archives: it allows you to search through multiple archives and search engines including WayBack Machine, Google, Yandex and more.
Search by Image: allows you to reverse image search using multiple search engines (in my experience yandex tends to yield the best results)
Image Search Options: similar to the last one
this next section is pretty niche but... STEAM AND STEAM TRADING
SteamDB: adds some interesting and useful statistics
Augmented Steam: useful info specially for browsing and buying games
TF2 Trade Helper: an absolute godsend, lets you add items in bundles, keeps track of your keys and metal and your recent trades, displays links to the backpack tf page next to users profiles and more. look it tells me how much moneys i have and adds metal to trades without clicking one by one oh may god
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IN CONCLUSION: oooooh you want to change to firefox so badly, you want to delete chrome and all the chrome clones that are actually just spyware and use firefox
HOW TO USE MOZILLA ADD-ONS ON YOUR PHONE
if you already use firefox on android, you'll know there are certain add-ons compatible with the app, some of them even being made just for the mobile version such as Video Background Play FIx. while most of them are pretty useful, some more specific ones aren't available on this version of the browser, but there's a way of getting some of them to work
you need to download the firefox nightly app, which is basically the same as the regular firefox browser but with the ability of activating developer mode. you can find how to do that here. once you've enabled it, you need to create a collection with all the add ons you want. i wouldn't recommend adding extensions if the creators haven't talked about phone compatibility, but XKit and Shinigami Eyes should work
also, don't tell the government this secret skater move, but you can try using both the regular firefox browser and nightly so you can have youtube videos in a floating box while you browse social media.
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see? i can block this terf while Rick Rolling the people following this tutorial. isn't that tubular?
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hazelsmirrorball · 3 months
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Roses | Oscar Piastri
SUMMARY: After Rumors go around that Oscar was a ghost boyfriend he decides to show up for his ex girlfriend most important night FACE CLAIM: Lola Tung pairings: Actress! Reader x Oscar Piastri
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via twitter!
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yn via insta stories! oscarpiastri via insta stories
posted five minutes ago deleted five minutes ago
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yn via instagram
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liked by ybffs_instagram, olivia.rodrigo, landonorris and 1,230,340 others
yourusername Life recently ever since I decided to be happy
tagged: ybffs_instagram, davidiancono
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user101 the shade? mother leaves for six months and comes back in her reputation era. Love that for her.
user10 I feel that lando liking this post means so much more than just a like
user151 Y/n doesn't follow Oscar anymore. Help.
davidiancono TEAM CAM CAMERON
ybffs_instagram girl finally ur back
olivia.rodrigo I missed you so so much.
user590 I'm sorry but this being post not even after an hour of Oscar deleted story makes me go insane.
user191 they are not broken up! Talk to the hand
y/nandoscarupdates via instagram.
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liked by by ybffs_instagram,user178 and 1,000 more.
y/nandoscarupdates a close source to the couple informed us that Oscar Piastri and Y/n L/n have called it quits. They've been broken up for around two months now. Sources say that Oscar and Y/n couldn't make time to see each other due to their busy schedules.
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user10 is the close source y/bff/n? because I think she just e3xposed herself by liking this post
user15 im sorry but didn't y-n go to every single race Oscar had last season? I never once saw Oscar showing up to her things.
user192 I think you guys are siding with Oscar because my girl was always alone in premiers while Oscar always had her by his side.
y/nupdates just posted
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liked by user101, user15, oscarpiastri and 178,000 others.
y/nupdates what we are not going to do is hate on this poor girl. I'm sorry but I don't think that updates account is correct. Y/n was noting but supportive in the relationship, I truly believe she went to everything she could. Oscar on the other hand....when did we see him in one of her events? Im sorry but the support wasn't mutual.
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user13 touch some grass. you are acting as if you were also in the relationship.
user16 Oscar liked? what does this even mean?
user98 what does this add to their lore
yn via instagram
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liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 1,345, 569 others
yourusername Opening night for Hadestown! Forever grateful of giving Eurydice life.
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user134 Oscar liking this? guys I need peace
user126 omg! im so so proud of you
user928 our girl is taking broadway by storm
oscarpiastri as they say in theater break a leg
landonorris what is Oscar doing here?
user119 lando wants to start drama
...
Y/n paced back and forth in her dressing room, her nerves taking up her complete body. It was her first show in broadway. She knew they were going to be critics watching her every move. It was different from anything she had ever done before. Yes, she had acted and she did musical theater when she was in highschool but this was something completely different. This wasn’t a school production, this was an actual professional thing that could affect her career. She stopped in front of her dressing room mirror forcing a smile. It was her opening night and sadly none of her close friends were able to show up, different countries or schedules made it hard for them to show up, which she completely understood. But maybe a familiar face in the crowd could ease her nerves. A soft knock on the door stopped her train of thought. She quickly turned her head toward the door watching the assistant manager peak her head through. 
“Hi Y/n! Sorry for interrupting, You have a visitor that wanted to see you before the show started. Since you didn’t specifically put anyone in your visitor list, I wanted to see if it was okay.” She said quickly, knowing her duties she had a lot of things on her plate and the thing she least needed to worry about was about her visitors. Y/n quickly shook her head, not even asking who the “surprise visitor" was to cut their conversation short. She quickly left and a few seconds later a familiar face smiled shyly your way. Your eyes wandered over his body failing on the red flowers he was gripping tightly. 
“Oscar, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be in Australia?” She asked furrowing her eyebrows confused as she didn’t want to get closer to him afraid that he was an act of her imagination. 
“I couldn’t miss your special day, Y/n. I know we aren’t together anymore but you were always by my side in my important days. Even my less important ones. I wanted to support you, I know how important this is for you. So I wanted to see you on your first ever broadway show but if you want, I can leave.” Oscar replied while extending the flowers as you pulled him closely into a bone crushing hug.
yn via insta stories! oscarpiastri via insta stories
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cal-flakes · 9 months
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okay but imagine reader posting new swimsuit on her story but rafe makes her take it down 🤑🤑
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╰┈➤ “delete it”
warnings: mean!rafe, toxic relationship, swearing.
summary: y/n knows exactly how to get rafe’s attention.
she sighed, scrolling mindlessly through her phone as she lay on her stomach, legs crossed behind her. it had been an hour, and she hasn’t heard from him yet, and that wasn’t like him, what was he doing?
swiping out of instagram, she checked her messages once again. delivered, the small text said below her last message. so he’s definitely got it, but he hasn’t opened it. petty, she thought.
rolling her eyes, she diverted her attention to the numerous shopping bags scattered around her bedroom floor, quickly jumping up with an idea. if he’s too stubborn to reply, this’ll surely get his attention.
pushing yesterdays argument with rafe out of her mind, she grabbed the smallest shopping bag, reaching in to retrieve one of the many bikini sets she’d purchased earlier that day.
she unraveled the white strings delicately, laying it out in her bed with a smirk on her face. oh, how he’ll hate this.
she hummed along to the quiet music sounding around her room as she tied the bikini strap around her neck, huffing as she positioned herself awkwardly to do so.
once all the strings were tied and adjusted to compliment her curves perfectly, she played around with the light dimmer before grabbing her phone.
opening instagram, her thumb pressed down on add to story, and situated herself seductively in front of the large expensive mirror. snapping a quick photo, and adjusting the contrast, she sighed in delete as she typed in a basic caption and posted it to her story. now we wait, she thought.
thirty minutes- or so, passed while she lounged around her room, having replaced the bikini with a comfortable pair of shorts, and one of his oversized graphic tee’s. by this time, she’d forgotten all about the post, focusing on her skincare routine as she pinned her hair back in preparation.
a quite shriek escaped her lips as the first hard bang landed on the door of her apartment, her frame jolting in fright.
gathering herself, she smirked slightly as she tip-toed to the door, listening for the usual torrent of abuse to fall from his mouth.
“open the fucking door y/n, i know you’re home!” his stern voice called, full of anger. she rested her back against the wall near the door, sure to keep her footsteps quiet. she knew what she was doing, and she knew it was wrong, but she missed him- and if this was her only way to see him, then so be it.
“i swear to god y/n i’ll put this fucking door through if you don’t let me in, now!” he yelled again, followed by three more loud raps, which echoed through her small home.
giving in, she pushed back off the wall, deciding she’d had her fun. “okay-okay! chill the fuck out dude!” she shouted, hastily padding over to the door and unlocking it.
she smiled sweetly at him as he stalked through the doorway, almost squaring up. “dude?- did you just call me dude?” he seethed, nostrils flaring as he towered above her.
“yeah? what’s the big deal?” she chuckled, nonchalant closing the door behind him before making her way past, launching herself onto the couch.
following suit, his heavy footsteps taunted hee as he rounded the couch, stopping between her legs to look down on her. “delete it” he spat, fists balled up either side of him. “delete what?” she cooed, twirling her hair as she looked up at him through her lashes. “you know what y/n, don’t play fucking dumb, it won’t work this time” he snapped.
“ugh, you’re no fun” she scoffed, rolling her eyes as she picked up her phone to unlock it. “no fun? you think being a little whore for the world to see is fun?”
gasping, she feigned offence as she held a hand up to her chest, mouth agape. “woah- that was rude, very uncalled for rafe..” she teased, smirking as she felt his eyes watching her while her fingers tapped away at the screen.
“see? all gone? you happy?” she laughed, tossing her phone back to its original spot on the couch. “oh, so you just do this shit to piss me off huh?” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.
“well- see, i missed you, and you were being all stubborn and rafe-like because of yesterday, so what else was i supposed to do..” she muttered, delicately taking ahold of his hands to pull him onto the couch.
deflating, he allowed himself to fall into the spot next to her, his hands moving to her waist instinctively as she straddled him. “you drive me fucking insane y/n, i don’t even want to know what other stupid shit goes on in that little head of yours..” he groaned, throwing his head back as she cuddled into him.
“yeah, but you love me” she stated confidently, pressing soft kisses to his exposed neck. “mhm..” he hummed, pushing some stray hairs behind her ear.
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wrongplacerighttime · 3 months
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agent!harry x agent!fmc
the one where grace and harry are working a late night at the office. he follows her into the supply closet and things get…interesting…and grace realizes just how much she doesn’t hate him // a blurb for little bunny
part one here // part two here // little bunny masterlist
wc: 3.5k
tw: this basically just filthy, dirty smut. MDNI!! 18+. sir kink, breeding kink, little bit of degradation. not sure what else. lemme know if i missed anything. :)
yes, sir.
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It was late, and the last thing Grace wanted to be doing was typing reports. She had her headphones on, working double duty playing music and holding her hair back out of her face. Her fingers were moving rapidly over the keyboard trying to make the work go as quickly as possible. She had more involvement in the most recent case, which meant there was more paperwork on her part that she needed to make sure got filed properly. She reminded herself this is why she liked to sit back and watch more than she liked to be in the field. Grace also had been consulting on a string of murders around LA county and she was waiting for an email back from the chief of police before she left, and the time zone difference meant she would be here for a while longer. She glanced at the clock, the seconds hand ticking and dancing over the numbers, almost taunting her in a way. Her molars clench together in the back of her mouth stifling a yawn growing from her lungs. It really wasn’t that late, but it was December and the darkness crept into the sky earlier and earlier as the days passed and they were in the thick of the season, winter solstice just around the corner, making 8:00pm feel like 10:00pm, and she was ready for bed.
It didn’t help that Harry was sitting across the room at his desk, working on his own reports and throwing the occasional ball of wadded up paper Grace’s way to get under her skin. She had put the headphones on hours ago to drown out his incessant pen clicking and finger drumming that had caused her to lose focus more times than she could count. She had asked him to stop once but he made it a point to do it more obnoxiously and after she had put on her music to drown it out, he resorted to the paper throwing to continue to get on her nerves. A paper landed right on her keyboard and that was her final straw.
“God damnit Harry! Can you just leave me alone for once?” She rips her headphones from her ears and slams them down on her desk…or rather her keyboard and whatever combination of keys being pressed results in her entire file disappearing, whooshing away into inconceivable nothingness. Her eyes ignite with anger and she launches the paper ball back in his direction, hitting him in the face. She should've thrown something heavier, like her headphones.
His eyes narrow at her before a smirk grows on his face. “I don’t like your attitude, Grace.” He teases in a sing-song voice, heckling her.
“Fuck you. I’m trying to work and you’re distracting me.” She crosses her arms over her chest and leans back in her chair, tipping her head back and looking at the ceiling. “And you just made me delete this whole file so now I have to start over.”
“I didn’t make you do shit, you should have been more careful instead of throwing a fit like a toddler.” He says matter-of-factly with a shrug and she scoffs, rolling her eyes before opening an empty document and deciding it was better to just ignore him. They’re quiet for another moment, Grace trying to calm her breaths while attempting to recall everything that was on her document as Harry’s fingers clicked over his keyboard, humming a familiar tune under his breath. His actions were maddening, but it didn’t stop her eyes wandering over his slightly unbuttoned shirt exposing his skin...didn’t stop her gaze trailing over the tendons in his forearms flexing and relaxing as he typed. She felt the fire traveling down the wire of her spine, settling right in her belly. She pulls her lower lip between her teeth and turns back to her computer and sighs.
“What case are you even working on?” She asks, and he glances over at her quickly before looking back to his blank screen. The truth is, he hadn’t really been working on anything at all. They’d been so busy recently, and he had stayed behind during their last case. It had been weeks since they last fucked. He just missed her. He wanted to just be in her proximity, alone, for a little while before he left…but a little bit turned into three hours. He’s been here, with her, daydreaming about taking her into the supply closet and bending her over a shelf.
“Consulting on a suspected LDSK in Denver.” He lies through his teeth and her nose crinkles at his answer.
“I don’t remember seeing that on the list Aaron sent out?” Her statement sounds more like a question, and he scrambles to come up with an excuse.
“Uh, he just put it on my desk this morning. I’m waiting for an email back from the police department.” His jaw ticks once and she knows he’s lying…that’s his tell.
“You’re lying but whatever.” She mutters and he presses his lips in a flat line. She opens the drawer of her desk, looking for a manila folder but instead sees that she’s run out. She stands, walking past his desk on the way to the door. He spins in his chair to follow her with his gaze.
“Where are you going?” He asks, throwing a stress ball in the air before catching it again, repeating the motion but she doesn’t stop walking.
“Supply closet. Does it matter? Wanna come hold my hand so I don’t get lost?” She feigns in a whiny voice and pushes the glass door open, striding down the empty hallway while shaking her head, the atmosphere almost eerie when no one else is here. The hallway is dimly lit from the flood lights, her eyes adjusting to the difference as she rounds the corner and pushes the supply closet door open. She flips the switch on the wall and the door clicks shut. The supply closet was actually an empty office, so “closet” wasn’t the proper label for it. She weaves her way through shelves of office provisions and she hears the door open and shut again. Her heart races, knowing she’s not alone. Realistically, she knows it’s just Harry coming to bother her. They were the only two here. That didn’t make it any less unsettling…something about being in a small, dimly lit space with him making her pulse skyrocket.
“Go away.” She tries to make her words stern, but they come out shaky. She sees his figure standing in the shadows of the room, and she swallows meekly as she turns back to the shelf where the folders are. “You don’t scare me, Styles. If that’s what you’re trying to do.” She feels his presence moving closer to her and her hands shake as she grips the box in her hands.
“Wasn’t. Just miss you.” His voice is low in her ear and he presses his chest against her back, warmth radiating through the thin material of his shirt. He cages her between his arms, his mouth dropping to the crook of her neck and his teeth graze her skin. He bites lightly causing her to wince, then soothes the pain by lapping his tongue over and kissing.
“Miss me?” She twists around to face him. His breath fans over her lips at their close proximity and before she can say anything else, his lips crash to hers and she groans into his mouth. He smiles into the kiss…at the reaction he always seems to be able to pull from her. Their lips move in synchrony, his tongue darting into her mouth the second she parts her lips. Her hands run up his broad chest before going around his shoulders and she tugs the curls at the nape of his neck. She pushes her hips against him, a primal reaction she can never control, her mind forcing her body as close as she can get to him. His strong arms wrap around her waist, covering the expanse of her back and holding her to him as he walks her away from the shelf and backs her into a wall.
“Need me so bad don’t you, bunny? Can't get enough?” He drops his lips to her collarbone as she mewls, her thighs squeezing together trying to relieve the pressure growing between them. And she hates to admit that he was right. She couldn’t get enough. No one compares to him. Nobody ever would…and she can’t help that she craves him. Craves way he stretches her open, craves the way he talks her through it every time…even craves the way he uses the pet name for her because he knows it makes her tummy twist with desire. He ruts his hips into her and she can feel his hardness pressing into her, catching her shirt and exposing her skin to the frigid air in the closet. His fingers dance over her waistband before dipping underneath. He trails a digit between her folds, collecting her arousal before pressing against her sensitive bundle of nerves and her head falls back against the wall, bucking her hips into his hand desperate for more friction. The gates inside her mind were fighting to be let open, and she's holding the mindset she had been so desperate to fall into at bay. She didn’t want to be vulnerable around him, but something about him just had her feeling so hazy, it was intoxicating just being near him.
“Please, sir. Need you.” The words tumbled from her lips before she realized they even came out. She was desperate, her mind slipping quickly into submissiveness, something she’d tried to hide from him for too long. He pulls back to look at her, the title something he’s not used to hearing from her, and he notices the way her eyes are glazed over and her pupils are blown wide inside her irises, her bottom lip jutting out slightly swollen from their kiss. He knows that look anywhere. Maybe not on her…but god did he love it, his own switch flipping inside him and changing his train of thought
“Oh, my sweet girl. There she is.” He hooks a finger under her chin and thumbs over her lips. Grace opens and wraps them around his thumb and sucks lightly, flattening her tongue against the skin. His eyes flutter and he leans his forehead against hers. She watches him through her lashes, doe-eyed and drunk on him. She swirls her tongue around the tip of his thumb and a groan of pleasure escapes from his throat. He feels his cock twitching against the zipper of his pants and when his eyes open, she sees the darkness in his expression and she feels the heat swirl in her belly, one that she’s grown all too accustomed to around him.
“Knees. Now.” He demands and she complies without a second thought. He’s been wanting to feel her pretty lips wrapped around him since the day they met, when she wore the most perfect shade of pink over them. She quickly brings her hands up to undo his belt and he watches from above, his fingers tracing delicately over her jawline.
“Look at you, so desperate to get me in your mouth, like a good little slut.” She whimpers at his words and quickly makes work at the button, popping it open and sliding the zipper down its track. In one swift move she’s greedily pulling at his waistband, yanking the fabric away as his cock springs free and her mouth waters at the sight.
“‘Cause that’s all you are right?” She looks up at him through her lashes and a devilish grin plays on his lips at the sight of her cheeks flustered and he waits for her answer. Her eyes flick down once to his hard dick against his torso, and she nods in confirmation. Her eyes meet his again, pleading for his permission and needing to feel the weight of him in her mouth more than she needs the air she breathes. But before he gives in to her, he wants to hear her say it.
“Words. Wanna hear you say it baby.” He croons and she squeezes her thighs together with a small whine.
“Y-yes, sir. I’m just a slut. Only for you.” She adds and she sees the look in his eyes go a shade darker.
“That’s right, only for me, bunny. Go on. Suck it.” He demands, grinning at her words and this…this is what he’s been waiting for, this scene with her on her knees in front of him…maybe the supply closet where they work wasn’t the best place, but seeing her like this just for him makes up for it. She parts her lips and wraps them around his tip, sucking and kissing, grazing lightly and teasing him just a little. His fingers intertwine through the strands of her hair, gripping at the root and pushing her forward. She opens further for him, tears pricking her lash line as he nudges the back of her throat. She breathes through her nose, and his chin drops to his chest taking in the sight below him. A sight that fills his fantasies, the image he conjured up in his head to help him get himself off on many lonely nights, and it’s better than he could’ve ever imagined.
“Fuck, Grace. Just like that baby. So good. Look so pretty like this.” His words encourage her, wanting nothing more than to please him. Steadying herself, she grips her hands on his thighs, dimpling the muscle under his skin as she pushes herself further, taking as much of him as she could down her throat and swallowing around him. His free hand darts up to the wall to hold himself up, the sensation of her throat squeezing around him making his knees weak. A string of expletives fall from his lips as his eyes flutter closed, rolling back into his head. He pulls away momentarily and she breathes in, before he’s slowly thrusting back in and making her gag around his cock again and again.
“Fucking hell. Look at you…taking it all down that pretty throat. Knew you could, knew you’d do so good for me.” He speaks between gritted teeth. His encouragement sends her mind into a frenzy and she flattens her tongue against him as she pulls her head away, leaving just the tip and she swirls her tongue around it before sliding him down her throat again, repeating the motions. He tightens his grip around the strands of her hair, pulling at the root and she hums, sending vibrations through his length. With a curse under his breath, he pulls her off before she has him cumming down her throat. She breathes deeply, the deprivation of air stinging her lungs as it filters back in through her nose. Her chest heaves with heavy breaths and her lips are swollen, tears stained with mascara streaming down her cheeks from his intrusion. He can’t help but think she looks ethereal like this, all drunk and dumb just from his cock down her throat. “Up, baby.” He commands and she stands, he takes her cheeks between his hands and brings his lips to hers, melding them together and her eyes squeeze shut, still searching for the breaths she lost.
“Please fuck me.” She begs, her voice raspy as she breaks the kiss and he wastes no time as he spins her around, her chest pressing against the wall. He yanks her jeans and underwear down all in one go, running his hands over her now exposed skin as he’s eye level with her dripping hole.
“So pretty.” He mumbles, running his thumb over her and watches as she clenched around nothing. He taps her ass lightly once before he stands and she grins. He guides himself to her, sliding through her arousal and bumping against her clit. Grace looks down, watching the way he slides between her folds and his tip glistening with a mixture of the both of them in the dim lighting. He pulls back and slowly, finally, pushes himself into her and her eyes flutter closed, a garbled groan coming from the depths of her throat at the stretch, feeling every ridge…every vein. He stills once he’s fully sheathed inside of her, grabbing her wrists and forcing them behind her at the base of her spine. He holds them there as he pulls out, cursing under his breath at the way she grips him. He snaps his hips, pushing through her walls without warning and she feels the tears well in her eyes once more, the pain mixing with the pleasure sending sparks down her spine straight to her clit. He drives into her again and again, sweat forming on his hairline and cries and moans falling from her lips.
“Gonna fill your pretty little pussy up, get you all full of my cum.” He leans over her and speaks against the shell of her ear. A pathetic whine leaves her throat at the image of him dripping from between her legs and down her thighs. And she loves it, every single time she can’t get enough, feels like it gets her high. He feels her clench around him at his words and he smirks. “Yeah? Y’like that? Like the thought of me claiming you, branding you with my cum?”
“Yes — god yes..” She groans, the thought of walking around with him all warm inside her making her feel floaty. His grip on her wrists tightens and she bites her lip, the pressure inside her growing and coming to a head.
���Sweet bunny, bet you’d like it if I got you pregnant too, huh — fuck — wanna see that cute little belly swollen, let everyone know who you belong to.” He growls, his teeth brushing the cartilage of her ear, and her head is spinning at the image he’s painting inside her head with his filthy words. His ring-clad hand reaches around her hip and he presses his fingers against her clit, her head falling back against his shoulder. She pants, feeling his broad chest against her back, the friction of their bodies making her skin hot. He pinches the pearl of nerves between his fingers and her mouth falls open.
“Oh fuck Har-Harry I’m gonna —”
“I know, bunny. Squeezing me so tight, cum for me.” He rubs his fingers over her clit and then she’s seeing stars, eyes squeezing shut and his name falling from her lips like a prayer as she pulses around him, pulling him over the edge with her. He grunts and groans against her shoulder, praising her and riding through his own orgasm while holding her up. Her legs feel like jello and when she feels him twitching inside her she hums in contentment. His hips still, and he leaves open mouth kisses against her neck, his teeth grazing her skin and leaving goosebumps.
After another moment catching his breath, he pulls out of her and tucks himself back into his pants. He bends down, pulling her pants up for her and spinning her around to button them. She looks up at him through her dopey eyes and he knows she isn’t quite back down to earth yet.
“Gonna hold all of me in there til you get home, m’kay sweet girl?” He brings his forehead to hers as she nods aimlessly. He pecks her in the tip of her nose once. Then her lips and she lets out a whimper into his mouth. “Got it?”
“Yes, sir.” She mewls and he smirks, grabbing her hand and leading her out of the supply room. He walks them back to their desks, gathering her laptop and papers into her bag as she watches him, her conscience coming back to reality slowly but surely. He doesn’t say anything, offering his hand to her again wordlessly and she reluctantly takes it. They ride the elevator down to the lower level in silence, his foot tapping on the floor. When the doors open, she keeps her head low and quickly exits, making her way out the front door of the building to her car parked across the street. He follows behind her, parked in the same lot. He turns to her before opening his door. She bites her lip, fighting the grin that wants to emerge.
“See you tomorrow, bunny.” He says just loud enough for her to hear, the streetlight casting a warm light over his features making her heart swell. She nods.
“Tomorrow.” They both slide into the drivers seats of their cars. She watches as he drives off, a pang in her chest almost wishing she was going with him. She shakes the thought away, starting her car and driving home on autopilot as her mind wanders, her thoughts full of him…his voice…his eyes…the ink scarred into his skin. She pulls up to her apartment building, sighing and cursing herself.
She thinks she’s falling for him. Grace walks inside, her mind racing around in circles.
She couldn’t be in love with him, because they weren’t supposed to let their feelings get in the way of their job…and whatever else they had going on between them. It was just sex. She runs her hands through her tangled hair as she unlocks her door, pushing herself inside and dropping her bags on the floor. She completes her night routine in record time and climbs between the covers sheets on her bed, her head hitting the pillow signifying her favorite time of the day. Her mind is a little hazy still, and sleep pulls her under into dreamland.
They were filled with him, and she was fucked.
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strawberryspence · 1 year
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Because I am obsessed with the famous trope here’s another one that kept me up all night.
Steve and Eddie dated right after Vecna in ‘86 and it’s perfect. They date each other and it’s like two puzzles clicking together. But they’re young, foolish and they both have mountains of trauma. And sometimes, the passion and love, just isn’t enough to keep a relationship going.
They have a messy break up that has Eddie packing all his stuff up in ‘88. Eddie goes to LA or New York, either way that’s where he gets discovered. He then goes on to write some very angsty and angry rock/metal music about the break-up that gets him up on the map.
Steve hates it. He hates it with every fibre of his soul because it’s one thing when you and you ex still have the same friends and have to be civil with each other, but it’s a whole other thing when you open the radio and this man you dated, this man you loved and cared for and failed is just out here singing it for the whole world to hear.
And yeah listen, it’s petty and dumb. But Steve writes his own fucking songs, it’s not the direct response to Eddie’s song but it’s close. By that time it’s already ‘90 and Eddie’s made a whole name and career out of their relationship. Steve writes the songs, he sings, and he sends the damn demo to almost fifty different companies. And he gets picked up by one company.
Steve takes the pop star route, and with his looks and his somehow amazing vocals, by ‘94 Steve’s on the charts with Whitney and Mariah. The whole Party has solemnly promised to not get involved with their petty songwriting fighting anymore. They also haven’t spoken in person in almost six years, and the only way they communicate now is through the freaking songs.
There’s not a lot of overlap with the rock and pop community, and no one notices it until ‘05. It’s one fan that makes this one blog post talking about this weird freaky coincidence in Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson’s songs. It becomes a whole thing, like someone from Hawkins pulls out the yearbooks and finds out that they could’ve known each other. Their faces are splashed together into every magazine and celebrity entertainment shows.
They don’t say anything about it. No one comments about it for a few years and it infuriates the public even more. The next time Steve comes out with a song, Eddie comes out with another song a few months after and it’s once again a literal conversation about their relationship.
The whole thing continues until ‘11 and by then there’s blog dedicated for all the clues. It’s now a long running thread, and it gets updated when there’s another clue to this massive confusing puzzle. There’s a whole subsection with names of every Party member and how they connect the two artists together. There’s freaking flow charts and pictures and family trees.
It only ends when Eddie finally posts two pictures on Twitter. The first one is taken backstage. All you can see is Steve’s back, but you will know it’s him because of his hair. He’s standing at the side of the stage, and on the stage is Eddie Munson singing. The second one is a picture of Eddie sitting in a couch as Steve looms over him, hands crossed on his chest. Eddie’s signing his own album with a smirk, while Steve glares at him. If you zoom, you can see the sign on the album saying, “To Steve. This album is for you.”
The caption says: “Me and my biggest fan. Circa 2004.”
Steve replies to the original post saying: “You’re sleeping on the couch tonight.”
Eddie deletes the post and reposts it with: “Me and my wonderful, gorgeous, talented husband. I can’t believe I am married to THE Steve Harrington.”
It’s the first time the term “break the internet” is ever used.
Turns out, they were just writing the songs to spite each other and to add fuel to the fandom fire. (In an interview, Eddie says, “It’s our foreplay.” and Steve doesn’t talk to him for a solid 30 minutes for running his mouth. It only lasts for 30 minutes because Eddie made it up to him by using his mouth for something else.)
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teasteeper · 20 days
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ohh i like this…. i got carried away T_T (sorry anon, i had to delete the original ask bc tumblr deleted half of this when i first posted it. i hope u see this <3)
suggestive 18+ mdni
before you started working for them hendery couldn't care less about getting his makeup done, seeing it as a time to scroll through his phone, his eyes burning after waking up only thirty minutes prior. he's truly a man in that he doesn't get makeup, barely noticing a difference between his bare face and his face after sitting in the chair for an hour. he hates those tiny angled brushes near his eyes, the feeling of foundation suffocating. he honestly prefers the days when he's running late, getting pushed into the chair while all the makeup artists band together to make him look flawless in under ten minutes. the less time he has to spend getting his makeup done, the better.
that's until the day you started, brushing glitter onto yangyang's eyelids as hendery stumbled through the door forty five minutes late, a baggy hoodie draped over his shoulders and his hair sticking up in all directions. did he even wake up?, he thinks, frozen awkwardly in place as he deciphers whether his tired eyes were actually staring at the prettiest girl he's ever seen or if he was still dreaming.
the artist hunched over kun subtly rolls her eyes at the sight of hendery, tapping your shoulder and pointing to him with her foundation cushion, "i'll finish yangyang's makeup. you can start on him"
hendery sits in the makeup chair, heart racing as you pick up your bag of supplies and move towards him. it's too early for this, he thinks, the soft smile you give him and your sweet vanilla scent, your fingers gently clipping his hair away from his face. it all goes straight to his dick, his mind still half asleep and morning wood not yet fully soft. yeah, it's too early for this.
from then on he sets his alarms extra early, fixing his hair and putting on a decent outfit before getting to set on time, aiming to make getting his makeup done last as long as possible. the members couldn't care less, just happy that he hasn't been late for weeks. but you notice, looking forward to the early mornings you spend talking and laughing together. there's no use denying your big dumb crush on him, butterflies in your tummy when you tell him to look up at you, instantly following your command and showing you his big pretty eyes so you can do his eyeliner.
he actually starts to take an interest in makeup, purely because it's your job, and he swells with pride when you start to take an interest in wayv, listening to their music on the regular and getting fully invested in the team. to hendery it feels like you're his biggest fan, waiting off stage between performances so you can touch up his makeup and fix his hair.
this week finally comes around, and everyone's on edge, what with kcon and countless other performances wayv's scheduled to do. hendery's happy to see you loading your luggage into one of the black suvs parked outside the company building to take you all to the airport. you're there after every performance, his eyes scanning through the crowd of staff members for you. he gives you a tired lopsided smile as he steps forward, spreading his feet apart to make himself shorter. then you feel his hands on your hips, and you're left staring wide eyed at his closed eyes, waiting for you to powder his face. it feels like you're standing like that for hours, the soft weight of his hands on your hips, his abs tensing with his heavy breaths. who the fuck chose this outfit? his jacket mostly unzipped with no shirt underneath, the elastic of his briefs on full display. the worst part is he knows he looks good, flashing you his smile before running back to the stage for their next song.
you think this might be the best job ever as you pack up your makeup bag, watching the last song of their performance on the monitor backstage. hendery finds you again as soon as they're backstage, "follow me" he whispers, placing a hand on your lower back and looking over his shoulder as he ushers you toward the artists' entrance and through the door outside.
"hendery wh-" you're backed against one of the black suvs parked outside, hendery's hands on your hips like before. they tremble with adrenaline, sweat dripping down his temple with heavy breaths passing through his lips. "can i kiss you?"
you can barely finish your whimpered consent before he's dipping his head down, lips crashing to yours in a heated kiss. he's surprisingly gentle, grounding himself by pressing his fingers into your hips. muscles flex in his jaw and his cheeks hollow, swallowing your dreamy sighs. you're fully pinned to the car behind you, your tshirt riding up and his belt buckle cold as it presses against your tummy.
your hips are pressing up against his, whimpering into his mouth, and his restraint snaps. his arm circles your waist and pulls you into him so he can open the door to the backseat, "get in, baby" he's relieved it isn't locked, watching your shirt ride up your back as you crawl in.
he wastes no time pulling your leg over his hips so you're straddling him, tipping his head back to kiss you. he has to be back inside in a few minutes, hands roaming your body to feel as much of you as possible. his lips trail down your jaw, softly sucking marks onto your neck. he leans back every few seconds to check his work, addicted to the way your skin blotches and shines with his spit.
and you're even better than he dreamed you'd be, impatiently jerking your hips against his, your chest pressed to his and your arms clung around his neck. with the way you just melt in his hands, he figures you'd let him fuck you right here in the back of the luxury car. he nearly considers getting his cock out and making you sit on it, but the bubble around you two bursts, two loud knocks striking the car window. hendery's manager shuffles awkwardly outside, his back turned to you as if he hadn't just seen you two drooling into each others' mouths.
hendery turns back to you with an exasperated expression and feign panic in his voice, "does my makeup look okay?"
"i'll fix it" you smile, wiping your lip gloss from his mouth.
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neroushalvaus · 5 months
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Tumblr in the 60s – Part 2
Part 1 / Deleted Scenes
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💁🏼‍♀️brigittebardots Follow
anyone want to get fake married so i can get the pill to slut around
💋 marrymetwiggy Follow
Just say you have painful monthlies, I heard it works if you have a nice doctor!
💫 treatmetendermaureen Follow
Remember you still should use the sheet whenever possible. Stay safe ♡
1087 notes
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♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow
i think there's something wrong with me, i'm just so sleepy all the time, it's not fair
👭 marvelettesofficial Follow
That's because you spend all your nights listening to radio luxembourg
♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow
i heard nothing last night so i built an antenna out of poultry net, iron wire and bits of tin. i cut my fingers and our family chickens ran away
☁️ ankin-vaimo Follow
A small price to pay for some music.
♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow
the antenna fell apart before the german guy stopped talking
34 notes
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🗣 ilovejohnlennon-deactivated19660729
me: chilling
my brain: if you were shot and weren't sure whether you'd live or die should you call the cops to make sure your murderer gets caught or call the ambulance to increase your chance of survival
me: what
🗣 elviskneesofficial-deactivated19631119
There should be a number that'd reach both of those
🕺 elvisherselvis Follow
That number already exists. It's been used in my city for like a two decades.
🏆 petebest-or-bust Follow
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🕺 elvisherselvis Follow
Fuck you I'm British.
🪛 patrickwhoghton Follow
Oh my G, this post from -62 sounds so prophetic now that they're trying to make the 911 thing catch on, where's that jagger meme
🖖 spock-in-tardis Follow
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🕺 elvisherselvis Follow
This is literally not gift of prophecy. I told you back when this post was first made that this number has already existed in UK for years. It was obviously going to spread elsewhere, even US was bound to catch on at some point.
🏆 petebest-or-bust Follow
you are still here?? keeping an eye on this post??
💋 marrymetwiggy Follow
you're so grumpy @elvisherselvis maybe you should phone the emergency number and get a wahhh-mbulance
98,9 t. notes
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📼 bisexualbarbaradane Follow
my date: Oh I listen to folk as well!
me: That's so cool! Who are your favourites?
my date: I'm sooo into Bob Dylan.
me:
my date: Is everything okay?
me, stuffing jelly babies into my purse: I have to go, like, right now, immediately, sorry
#it's okay if you liked dylan before he became the judas he is #but you can't call yourself a folk fan if you still support him #ugghh i hate him #electric guitar using lil bitch #sigh #jelly baby meme #bob dylan critical // #anti bob dylan // #bob dylan hate //
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🛸 premisendgame Follow
Cock and balls, I'm watching this previously banned american film where an american man is trying to fuck a soviet spy (played by famously very russian Greta Garbo) by offering her champagne and he is like "have you never had champagne?" and Greta is like "never 🥺 only goat's milk and a ration of vodka in the army" and the tv screen freezed and was like "ERROR!! CHAMPAGNE HAS BEEN SERVED IN SOVIET UNION SINCE 1936" I'm 😂😂😂
🪐 stalincredible Follow
You Americans will say anything to make Soviet stuff look silly
🛸 premisendgame Follow
Where do you think I am watching soviet tv from?? Or did I miss the memo where americans have the monopoly on joking about their own damn country??
322 notes
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🥁 ringoforpresident Follow
"In future there will be telephones you can take with you anywhere" I can't even fucking listen to Radio Luxembourg without building a goddamn satellite, sending it to space, reciting spells and prayers, and sticking the radio out of the window at 2am EET. And even then it needs to be snowing for it to work because the radio wave fairies like snow or some shit
♒ let-the-sunshine-in Follow
preach
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lains-reality · 10 months
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some ideas if you want to test how far you can go
obviously you are limitless, but you need to see how far you can go yourself, lester had the motto of 'i only know that which i can do' and asked 'what can i do?' since why not go all the way? not out of obligation or fear, but to see how much you can maximise your peace and joy! do it for the truth!
almost all of these require mindfulness as you need to be able to catch yourself in the moment of the mind's chatter - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now). infact your whole life will be based on the present moment, and not being in it makes it infinitely harder so please read the book.
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whoever i expected something from: give to myself 
before you do this: go here! (getting to a state of neutrality first might make this easier)
this one is to think back on a person that you don't like, now think abt whether you expected something from them. did you want them to act a certain way? now, whatever peace, love, security that you think they were meant to give you, feel that yourself
and even if it was someone that is meant to give you those things, you will need to release your hatred of them and give them up. you don't need to forgive them right now, but you will soon when you won't care much of their impact on your life and when you see that everybody is acting off insane levels of fear. i released my hatred of someone who is literally meant to take care of me and now i don't care abt them, i used to hate having any contact with them but now i can talk to them and not have my mind run 50 miles an hour. also! they called me to say that they're working on themself & will repair what they did
just keep doing that and going back to other people until you feel no more obligation to care abt what they did! this is (one way to) how you become free of attachment to people, and less anger
astral projection
pretty self explanatory, just try ap, it'll make you see you're not your body
for this i'd definitely see how far i could travel and for how long
‘No matter what happens, I will create no more pain for myself.  I will create no more problems.’
this one is to affirm this at the start of your day and surrender all trouble and control, just this one day (or longer) you'll let yourself have no problems
throughout the day you can remind yourself, when you are getting wound up, that today you've given up troubles and problems
this requires mindfulness - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now)
‘Am i willing to live (in a world) with no problems?’
this is just a question to be used for self-inquiry, meditation, an affirmation, whatever
‘What would i do if there were no others?’
same as the last question
no input
no music, no books, no overconsumption, no anything
just like a dopamine detox?
this one might be hard too (and maybe a bit useless, but try it?)
‘From here on, i have everything i need as i need it’
this one is to affirm this at the start of your day and surrender all trouble and control, just this one day (or longer) you'll let yourself have everything you need
throughout the day you can remind yourself, when you are getting wound up, that today you've given up worrying, anticpation of the worst and projecting into the future
this requires mindfulness - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now)
remove time - stop living through memory and anticipation
"Time and mind are inseparable. Remove time from the mind and it stops - unless you choose to use it. To be identified with your mind is to be trapped in time: the compulsion to live almost exclusively through memory and anticipation." - eckhart tolle, practising the power of now, pg. 31
self explanatory again, just remove time lol
idk you gonna have to figure this one out yourself
good challenge tbh
deleting or revising something everybody knows
not just some memory only you and 2 people remember, something like changing the name of earth itself
or historical events, or the order a song came out from your favourite artist
go crazy! keep in mind that there's no big or small, its all the same concept in awareness, even if i do imply it
just thinking abt when you go to search the thing you revised in google and it doesn't come up lol
live as if theres no past
this one is something that you should definitely try
i think this becomes the norm when you are present in the now (which is why its so important!)
the point is when you go bed, wipe out your past, through whatever way you like. then in the morning make a declaration that the past is no longer relevent! no longer will you go back to it as a source of identity, breaking the habit of it!
inspired by this quote by osho
i think this one will yield interesting results
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in the end, the goal is not especially to get results, but to release fear and limitations. you also get to practise being in the present moment!
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star-girl69 · 7 months
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Miscellaneous Masterlist
-for standalone series or oneshots, small fandoms not enough to warrant their own masterlist-
—-
Percy Jackson and the Olympians (TV Show)
Clarisse La Rue-
all asks i’ve answered under #clarisse thoughts
side character lore found: here!!
Incorrect Quotes (@ace-spades-1)
series:
“The Last Time” Saga
Part One - The Last Time
Part Two - Cowboy Like Me
Part Three - Tomorrow Never Came (coming soon!)
Part Four - Living Legend (coming soon!)
Part Five - Pretty When You Cry (coming soon!)
“Tolerate It” Trilogy (coming soon!)
Part One - Tolerate It
Part Two - You’re Losing Me
Part Three - Exile
“Perfect Family” Stories
Part One - Cherry Blossom
Part Two - Broken Spears and Bruised Shins
Part Three - Ivy Has an Affinity for Violence
Part Four - Ivy Has an Affinity for Violence Again
Part Five - Ivy and Clarisse: Dynamic Roblox Duo
Part Six - Danny is Adopted
Part Seven - Mother Y/N and Feral Attack Dog Ivy
oneshots:
In A Good Way
New Romantics
So It Goes…
I Can See You
Fade Into You
Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby
Better Than Revenge
Music To Watch Girls To
Let Me Love You Like A Woman
Your Girl
Don’t Delete The Kisses
Let The Light In
Apocalypse
I Did Something Bad
Sad Girl
She Calls Me Baby
Because Of You
American Teenager
Brooklyn Baby (coming soon!)
Groupie Love (coming soon!)
Haunted (coming soon!)
The Hills (coming soon!)
Black Beauty (coming soon!)
Shades of Cool (coming soon!) (title might change)
Put Me Back In It (coming soon!)
headcanons:
Love Song
I Hate Everyone But You
Friends to Lovers
Capture the Flag Injuries
Princess/AphroditeCabin!Reader
Daughter of Hypnos!Reader
Y/N in a Petty Argument
—-
Are You Afraid of the Dark? (TV Show)
Summer Dacosta-
series:
none yet!
oneshots:
Dark Paradise (coming soon!)
headcanons:
none yet!
—-
Ashoka (TV Show)
Shin Hati-
series:
Cruel World (incomplete + on hiatus)
oneshots:
none yet!
headcanons:
none yet!
—-
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controlmyfeet · 8 months
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i still feel everything when you are near - matty healy
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matty healy x ex!reader
angst
warnings: exes, alcohol consumption, insecurities, jealousy (kinda?), pining, kissing, crying (lmk if there’s more i need to add!)
a/n: not sure about this. i think the last time i tried to write fanfiction i was 13, so feedback is appreciated but pls be nice lol. also, english is not my first language!
3570 words
it still hurts. 
i didn't think it would hurt as much after 6 months, but seeing him in the flesh makes me realize it does. i thought i was already used to it, thought i was actually doing a good job moving on, if we ignore my slump in the first 3 weeks after the breakup, where i would just leave the house for work and groceries (that i would overbuy because i forgot i'd just cook for myself), i think i was doing pretty okay.
i should've guessed he would be in the city. he can't stay in one place for too long; if he has a few days free in between shows, he's going to look for a studio to work in. usually in london, los angeles, or here. most of the time, he ends up here.
but i never know where he is anymore.
i deleted twitter from my phone after 2 months. maybe because of the questions, perhaps because i didn't care, or maybe i was tired of reading all the tabloids and fearing they were true. maybe i care too much. whatever, right? it just means i haven't seen him in a while, even in pictures.
i'm sitting by the dark wooden bar counter when i first spot him. he's standing with charli and george in the vip section near the dj booth, surrounded by people as always. my friends noticed that he's here too, but they haven't said anything, which i'm grateful for. i'd rather pretend it doesn't affect me.
he looks different, though. his arms are bigger, and his hair is longer; soft curls fall over big brown eyes that crinkle whenever george says something funny. he still has that boyish smile.
lulu and bea went dancing and i said i'd join them in a minute. we go to this club every time we're in the city, but tonight it is more crowded than usual. my secluded spot at the bar being the only place i won't be pushed around. still, i feel bad. it's my best friend's birthday, and we came to new york together to celebrate, but instead, i'm drowning my sorrows with cosmos. 
"you won't even say hi now?" i hear matty's voice from behind me and turn around, startled. he stands tall and confident as always, but his eyes no longer hold the same energy. here, up close, i can see that his eyebags look more prominent, and his stubble has grown slightly. he looks tired. i don't think i look any better.
"hi," i say, looking into his brown orbs, phlegmatic, as if the butterflies in my stomach aren't going batshit crazy right now "i didn't see you, sorry."
he grins cheekily, "it's alright, darling."
i don't really know what to say. he should hate me, honestly. it wouldn't be surprising considering how we left things, with all the yelling, name calling. with all the broken picture frames. it started with another rumor while he was on tour, another leaked picture. he was so dismissive and vague about it that i just couldn't find it in myself to trust him, and he could only complain about how childish all of it was.
i guess he doesn't, though. they have free drinks inside the vip section. i remember it from when we came here together. he doesn't need to come all the way to the bar for a drink.
"it-it's good to see you," i stutter, apprehensive now. fearing that maybe he really does hate me, and just walked over to tell me how much so. i mean, i would hate him, too, if i could. but no matter how hard i try, i can't. and believe me, i've tried.
matty is standing so close that the loud music sounds muffled now, and the warm, dim light of the bar reflecting on his silky skin makes me want to melt into his arms. so i try to keep my eyes focused on my feet.
he seems to notice that i'm struggling as i fidget with my empty glass.
"can i get you another one?" he asks amicably. my eyes shift from my feet to the glass in my hands and back to his eyes.
"sure," i reply shyly.
he asks a bartender polishing wine glasses next to us for another cosmopolitan. behind the man, shelves from the same material as the counter hold a collection of glass bottles of different colors with labels sporting french and italian names. matty sits on the barstool beside mine. "so…what are you doing here in new york? i thought you hated the city this time of the year." 
and it's true, i hate new york during the summer. the concrete buildings seem to make the temperature much higher, and tourists crowd every corner. it feels claustrophobic. the subway also smells extra bad during these months. but i loved being here with him, no matter the season. i loved being anywhere with him.
"well, yeah. but it's lulu's birthday, and she wanted to celebrate it here, so here we are. the three of us." 
"bea is here too?"
"she is, yeah."
him talking about my friends is familiar. many sunday evenings were spent on his couch sharing a bottle of red with my newest candle burning on the side. at the same time, i'd tell him about the most recent gossip in my friend group, and he would listen.
the barman places the new drink before me and takes the empty glass. i thank him and take a sip of the pink liquid. it's sweet and sour, and the vodka calms my nerves a little bit. he's staring at my lips. so i lick them clean.
he shifts, and suddenly, i feel his calloused fingertips brush against my elbow resting comfortably over the counter. much more tender than last time; my skin burns where he touches it.
"how's your writing going?" he asks, looking into my eyes now.
i tell him i'm still at the magazine, it's going alright. not a lot has changed since we broke up. but it's less exciting, more monotonous. i leave that part out. and he asks me about my own stuff, poems and essays hidden in my drafts.
it's just awkward small talk. so awkward. like we're just acquaintances. friends of friends being left alone, being civil to each other.
it's also a conversation we've had before. documents on my computer that weren't fitting enough for the editors or that i just wrote on a whim. he used to tell me to publish them either way, to leave the magazine and find people who actually appreciate my work, or to start my own thing. but it would be useless; they're not good enough.
"well, i don't know, it's been a while since i've written anything out of work." i take another sip, just to calm down a little. "haven't felt very inspired lately." 
oh my god, shut up– i can't say this to my ex. it's embarrassing, pitiful.
"it happens." he takes my hand and brushes his thumb over my knuckles. i still shiver "you're really talented, love. you should be proud of yourself. i am."
even his praise hurts now; i miss hearing it daily. it's a stab in my chest, salt on the wound. so i just bite my lip and nod. afraid that if i say something, a choked sob will come out. 
there's longing in his eyes, and he gets a look like he wants to say more. but his gaze flickers behind me for a moment, and he drops my hand and gives my left shoulder a squeeze, showing me a soft smile. 
"i'll leave you be, then. it was nice seeing you, love."
there's a voice in the back of my head begging me to make him stay, but i know i can't do that, not when i recall why it ended the way it did. still, i want to reach for his hand and pull him back to me, just for a few minutes at least. but someone grips my shoulders.
"there you are!" lulu says excitedly, already a few drinks ahead of me. her dark blonde hair messy and her skin glimmering with sweat from all the dancing. bea follows right behind her. "c'mon, let's do some shots, you need to power up for all the dancing you owe me."
"alright." i force a giggle and down my drink as bea asks the bartender for three tequila shots.
a few minutes and many shots later, the three of us are on the dance floor, swaying wildly to the loud, thumping bass of whatever music the dj's playing. just being around my girls makes me feel less anxious, and the flashing lights, plus all the alcohol already flowing through my body are making my mind a bit hazy, which helps me let loose a little. 
as i move, i can feel the beat of the music inside my chest, sweaty bodies pushing against me without a care. i even forget about matty for a minute. i don't think about how his hands used to feel on me when we danced together, not at all.
we dance for maybe 30 minutes. until lulu finds one of her many ex-flings, and, as they catch up, bea asks me to go to the bathroom with her. taking my hand, she leads me out of the crowded area and towards the door labeled "ladies' room". 
the contrast from the mostly dark club to the bathroom's white walls makes my eyes squint. it's colder in here, quieter. i can hear the stifled bass from the music and high heels clicking against the floor tiles.
as i wait for bea, i brace myself on the sink in front of me and look into the mirror. everything is happening too fast. talking to matty, downing shots, and being dragged to the dance floor immediately. my head is pounding. i didn't have the time to process what is going on tonight. 
my ears are ringing, and it feels like all the alcohol has suddenly lost all its effect. instantly sobering up, i grab a paper towel and dab it on my arms and face to try to get rid of the sweat. turning on the sink, i wet my hands and place them on the back of my neck to cool down and try to help with the dizziness. i hear the toilet flush, and bea comes out of the cubicle, running her hands through her wavy black hair. i reach into my purse and pull out my lipgloss, coating my lips evenly while looking at myself in the mirror.
"i'm going to the back for a bit," i tell bea as she approaches the sink next to me.
"you okay? do you need water?" she asks, concerned
"yea- yes, i just need to breathe a little."
"okay, text me if you need anything." i just nod and leave the bathroom. she knows me, knows i need to be alone.
pushing through crowded bodies, i head to the club's back door, leading to a narrow alleyway where the employees usually store extra liquor bottles. it also doubles as a smoking area, so i shouldn't be surprised when i see him as soon as i open the door. tattooed arms flexing as he lights a cigarette, probably not his first one of the night, and i turn back to try to leave before he sees me.
"leaving so soon?" i turn around again and already feel my cheeks heating up. embarrassed, like a kid caught eating dessert before dinner. "you can stay."
"it's okay, i'll go somewhere else," i wave him off mindlessly. he came here to enjoy his cig on his own, right? he doesn't need his ex-girlfriend plaguing his chill alone time "i don't want to bother you, i just need some air."
"please stay." it's not the first time he says this, but this time i do. 
with pink-tinged cheeks and heels clicking loudly, i slowly walk down the three small steps in front of the door and move to stand across him with my back resting against the club's brick wall. the warm summer air hits my skin, and i can hear the rustle of the traffic. "you could never bother me." i pretend i didn't hear him.
"i thought you were quitting," i motion to the burning cigarette between his fingers. the moonlight illuminated the alleyway, making the smoke around him look like some kind of silver aura. he smiles at me.
"i'm trying," he says, taking a drag and blowing it out by the side of his mouth, and i laugh.
"it sure looks like it," i reply, still smiling. i'm not as nervous as i expected i would be in this situation; maybe the alcohol hasn't worn off as much as i thought.
he shrugs, running a hand through his hair. "well, you know me".
my eyes follow his every movement, long, calloused fingers holding the rolled paper limply and bringing it up to his red, pouty lips. i start to fidget with the end of my skirt, trying to distract myself by looking at how my fingers twist the fabric. busying myself, so i don't remember how those same lips used to feel against my own or on the curve between my neck and shoulder. 
i look up again when i hear matty step on his cigarette– putting it out– and he starts to walk in my direction. my breath hitches. we are face to face now, noses almost touching. closer than we were at the bar. i can see every freckle on his face when he's this close. i can see the chapped corner of his mouth and the grey that's starting to show up on his now tousled hair.
"why did you leave?" he's straight to the point. his voice comes out low, almost a whisper. at our position, there's no need to be louder than that. there's no hatred in his tone; still, he's not smiling. a flash of hurt appears on his face for a moment. "didn't i make you happy?"
"of course you did, matty." i build the courage to look into his eyes, honey pouring out of them. "we've already talked about this."
he lifts his right hand to rest it on the wall beside my head while letting out a scoff. "but i don't get it," his tone is a little bit louder now. he's not aggressive, but he's not whispering anymore. "what happened?"
"it was for the best." i've stopped whispering too. i place my hands on my forehead. as if to avert the impending headache that will follow this conversation. i don't really know what happened either or when it started happening. i feel sweat droplets running down my hairline, not sure if it's from the summer heat, our closeness, or my disquietude. 
"for the best of who?" he questions, lifting an eyebrow, "i don't feel any better!"
"we were fighting all the time, you know this!" there's a lump in my throat, and i can already feel the pressure between my eyes, working hard so the tears don't fall. i lower my voice again. "it was only a matter of time until one of us left, i just left first."
his gaze softens– probably after seeing my flooding waterline– and it's a while before he talks again, as if he's gathering his thoughts. thinking before he speaks for once, "i could never leave you" it's a low, gravely whisper, and i probably wouldn't have heard it if we weren't this close. "i wish you'd stayed." 
it's a blow to my chest. like a gunshot, blood running down my ribcage. and for a second, i don't think i can breathe.
"i wish you'd done a lot of things, matty." my vision is blurry now, and i feel a single tear roll down my right cheek. i wish he would answer my calls when he stayed late at the studio. i wish he would listen to me when i said i felt neglected. i wish he would give me more security when i felt jealous of the girls partying with him and the boys while i was on the other side of the pond. i wish i stayed. when i can't sleep because i suddenly realize that my bed is too cold, too empty. when i wake up, and there are no kisses on my bare shoulder. when i have to climb over my kitchen counter to reach the can of pasta sauce on the top shelf. when i'm so anxious, and there's no one to hold me… "sometimes i wish i stayed too." 
slowly, his hands cup my jaw. long fingers run lightly across my skin and wipe the lonely tear on my face. the hairs on my neck straighten up, and my heart stirs, beating a little faster. he carefully traces his right thumb over my lower lip, giving me time to reject and push him away. and then, his soft lips lock on mine. no warning. i feel his stubble rub against my chin and let out a sigh. there's a flutter on my lower stomach, burning. i should have pushed him away. instead, my fingers trail up his neck, nails brushing against his skin, and finally into his hair as he coaxes his hot tongue into my mouth. he tastes like cigarettes, of course. i can also taste the rum and lime from the mojito he had earlier. one of his hands travels down and he pulls me by the waist, bodies touching fully now. matty groans into my liquored mouth and i preen; it's good to know i still have that effect on him. that i can still make him let out those pretty sounds with just a kiss. it might be selfish, but we both are. because i bet he's proud too, that every touch of his still sends shivers down my spine. i pull out for air first, lungs already starting to burn. my fingers are still buried in his curls as he rests his forehead on mine, both breathing heavily.
"i need you, love," he whispers against my kiss-swollen lips, voice cracking. there's a smudge of lipgloss on the side of his mouth. it was no use reapplying it.
"matty, i can't," my voice comes out weak, just like how i feel.
"why not? you got somebody?" matty frowns, starting to sound a bit agitated.
i shake my head lightly "i don't."
"what is it?"  
"i already told you" it's my turn to cup his face now, scuff prickling against my palms. "we already had this fight before, you get annoyed because i can't trust you, and i start yelling because you don't take me seriously!"
"of course i take you seriously!" he defends, already becoming increasingly exasperated. i just shake my head; there's no use going through this all over again. it hurt enough the first time. however, i still close my eyes, knowing that if i keep looking at him, the chances of me believing him are higher.
"i'm not built for this, matty," for being away from him, for time zones and phone calls, for pretty girls throwing themselves all over him "i'm not strong enough."
"look at me, baby." his hands moved from my waist up to cup my face again, thumb brushing lightly over my cheekbones. "please," i open my eyes.
"do you love me?" he asks. i realize his eyes are glossed over now "because i love you. so fucking much."
it will be easier if i say no, break his heart all at once. give him a reason to give up. it takes me a while, but i nod.
"yeah?" there's a glimmer of hope on his wet iris.
"i do, but-"
"then we'll figure it out" it's not that simple; just figuring it out is not enough. we hurt each other.
"we'll just end up in the same place, matty," i explain firmly. at this point, tears stream both of our faces. his chest heaves, and i try to contain another sob. he turns his face slightly to press his lips to my palm, just for a second. 
"stay with me, please." our noses touch, and i can no longer distinguish his tears from mine. "i'll do better, i swear."
"it's not going to work."
"just for tonight at least, please," it comes out ragged, and he grazes his lips on mine, leaving a gentle but salty peck. "just for a little bit."
this shouldn't be happening. it's a mess, all of it. no matter how hard or how many times we try, even if we start all over again, we'll just end up in the same place. i know how i am and how he is. our love is tainted, a ticking bomb. so no matter how much i love him, how much i want him, i know we'll just go back to those screaming matches and broken pictures.
but if we keep doing this again and again, maybe then we won't have to say goodbye. at least i won't have to spend an entire lifetime missing him. so maybe just one night won't hurt, right? i've done it a million times. staying for just a little bit won't hurt…i think.
okay, just for a little bit.
289 notes · View notes
getosprettyboy · 11 days
Text
Let Me Into Your Heart
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Pairing : Remus Lupin x reader
Tags : nothing but fluff, drunk guy tries to get handsy.
Summary : Remus has been ignoring you for a while and you are going to find out why.
A/N : Sorry I deleted this, it didn't feel cute enough.
Dividers by cafekitsune.
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It’s been 3 weeks and Remus has been ignoring you with all his might. It is extremely frustrating for you to deal with him like this.
First, it started with him not replying to you back a greeting you sent towards him. Then he would sit far away from you in the great hall and now whenever he sees you he runs towards the other direction. When you try to confront him he comes up with an excuse of how he is late for a class or something.
So you started sending him letters, and he replied to none of them. It was infuriating.
You almost gave up on him but then you remembered the memorable and fun times with him and how much you loved those moments together.
Like that one time in the common room…
It was just the two of you in the common room with a vinyl record player playing some David Bowie songs to which you would occasionally bob your head while tracing the scars on his arms.
Suddenly you looked at Remus. The way his face would shine from the fire and how beautiful his scars looked on him. He isn’t fond of his scars and hates them but you think his scars form a beautiful pattern like constellations.
Remus saw you looking at him and spoke, careful not to break the peaceful atmosphere.
“What?”
“You have a pretty face Lupin.”
Remus flushed at your compliment and tried hiding his blush by deflecting the compliment.
“There is nothing really special about it.”
“There is. You have scars which I could trace to form constellations on and eyes as deep as the ocean and I fear if I look too deep into your eyes I might drown in them and might never be able to come back for air and that will be fine because I would rather die in those pools of water then never see your face again.
Remus just looked at you lovingly and asked, “Why do you like my scars so much?”
“Because they are a part of you and I love each and every single part of you Remus, even the ones you would call ugly. I will love them forever and always.”
“You’re acting like you’re in love with me,” Remus said half-jokingly.
“Maybe I am.”
Remus choked on the air with wide eyes.
“I’m joking silly,” You said as you lightly shoved him.
Remus nervously chuckled. It’s not like he is in love with you.
“Are you in love with me?” You asked with mischief glinting in your eyes.
“Who would fall in love with you?” Remus retorted.
“Oh my gosh, Remus, Shut up!” You said as you punched him in the arm.
“Ow.”
“It was well deserved.”
“Indeed.”
You both laughed at each other's antics when suddenly you stood up.
“Oh my gosh! Remus, Starman!!!”
Remus listened to the music carefully and you were right Starman by David Bowie was playing on the vinyl player.
You increased the volume and started singing the lyrics.
There’s a Starman
waiting in the sky
He’d like to come and meet us but he thinks he’d blow our minds
There’s a Starman
waiting in the sky
He’s told us not to blow it cus he knows it’s all worthwhile he told me
Let the children lose it
Let the children use it
Let all the children boogie
You stretched out your hand towards him and asked, “Remus John Lupin, may I please have this dance with you?”
“No.”
“Oh, come on now,” You whined.
“I don’t dance.”
“Oh yes, you do!”
You pulled him up and held both of his hands and swayed to the music.
Don't tell your poppa or he’ll get us locked up in fright
There’s a Starman
waiting in the sky
He’d like to come and meet us but he thinks he’d blow our minds
There’s a Starman
waiting in the sky
He’s told us not to blow it cus he knows it’s all worthwhile he told me
You both screamed the song at the top of your lungs. You both had never felt more alive.
That was your favourite memory with him, unfortunately, that was the last conversation you had with him because, from the next day forwards, he ignored you and didn’t even give you a reason for it.
You have been trying to talk to him but he wouldn’t listen to you.
A few days later your birthday arrived and you were a pretty popular person because of your good looks and good grades. You were also very nice so people liked you and knew you. So it was no surprise when more than the people you invited came to your birthday party. Even Remus came. You did give him an invite through James but you didn’t think he would actually show up.
You were greeting your multitude of guests when you saw Remus approaching you.
“Happy birthday Y/N,” Remus said handing you your gift.
“Thank you, Remus, how are you?” You asked.
“I’m good, you?”
“I’m great."
"Are you sure because you haven’t been talking to-”
“I think I heard Sirius calling me, I gotta go bye.” He quickly said running away from you.
You saw him rushing into the crowd of people to get away from you and it hurt to know that he didn’t want to be in our company.
“Enjoy the party.” You murmured with a frown.
Remus pushed towards the crowd of people and saw Sirius flirting with a girl with long brown hair but suddenly a girl came out of nowhere and started shouting at them. The angry asked Sirius something to which Sirius with wide eyes shook his head and she took the other girl’s arm and dragged her off somewhere.
Remus then approached Sirius.
“What was that all about?” Remus asked.
“The angry girl was the girl’s girlfriend,” Sirius replied.
“You really are a homewrecker.”
“I didn’t know!!! What about you?!”
“What about me?”
“Did you tell Y/N how you feel about her?”
“What are you talking about.”
“Moony, I see how you look at her, in fact, we all do.”
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
“Oh my- Just take this.” He hands Remus a shot of fire whiskey. “And don’t come back until you confess to her.”
Remus looked at him dully.
“Come on, Moony you can do it.”
“Fine.” Remus drank the shot and walked to where he last saw you.
He wasn’t actually going to confess to you, he was going back to his room and was going to read a nice book and go to sleep. If he wanted to confess to you he would’ve probably done it at the beginning of the semester but the fear of rejection took over. That’s why he has been ignoring you. He thinks if he stays away from you for a while he will lose feeling for you, which is unfortunately not working.
As he was heading to the boy's dormitory he saw a guy leaning on you a little too close while you were looking uncomfortable. His hand was slowly snaking around your waist as he got closer. You put a hand between your faces and said no but the guy wouldn't budge and kept getting close to you.
Remus saw red. He walked long paces towards you both and as you saw him relief washed over you.
“Hey, hands off her,” Remus said as he pushed the guy extra hard just so he could come to his senses. He looked very drunk and could barely stand up.
“Move. I and the pretty lady were having a conversation over here.” He slurred his words together.
“I don’t think so. So I’ll ask you politely, kindly fuck off."
Remus took your arm and led you to a more secluded place with the music echoing through the walls.
You sat down on the floor with your hands hugging your knees with later Remus following you and sitting beside you.
“Are you ok?” Remus asked.
���Why do you suddenly care?” You asked back.
“I've always cared for you Y/N,” Remus replied.
“Then why have you been ignoring me?” You retorted.
“I have my reasons.”
“What are they?’
“I can't tell you that.”
“Remus please tell me I want to know if you still even want to be my friend!”
“I do want to be your friend, I really do.”
“Then what is it? you won't talk to me, you won't reply to my letters what is it just tell me!”
“I-”
“Just spit it out!!”
“Because I like you. I really really like you.”
Silence.
He shouldn’t have said it. Remus really shouldn’t have said it. It was all Sirius’ fault for giving him the liquid courage and making him confess to you. Oh how he hated himself right now, now all he did was wait for you to laugh and make fun of him.
“Are you kidding me?! Are you stupid or something? why didn't you tell me?”
“So I wouldn't get rejected,” Remus replied quietly.
“Are you dense or something you fucking idiot?!”
“If you do not like me just tell me why you have to yell?” Remus replied a bit annoyed by your tone.
“I like you too you daft giraffe.”
“That's new, wait what?” Remus looked at you surprised.
“I've been giving you hints since the start of the semester. I've been flirting with you, I’ve been gifting you stuff, I've been sitting next to you at every chance I got I even shared my goddamn food with you!”
“I thought you were being friendly.”
“You bloody twat.” You shouted at him as you hit him on his arm.
“Ow.”
“It was well deserved.”
"Indeed."
“So.. you wanna kiss,” Remus asked with a warm smile on his face.
“Is that really a question?"
You grabbed his collar and pulled him in for the kiss. It was a sweet and sensual kiss with no hurry in it. You both savoured the kiss like it was your last. As soon as you both pulled away from the kiss, you laughed at him.
“What?” He asked smiling at you.
“You’re really dumb you know that.”
“That’s why you love me.”
“Oh, shut up.”
97 notes · View notes
cosmal · 1 year
Text
𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 — 𝐄𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐞 𝐌𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐧
note — this is for @sparklingsin spookinktober!! it was queued to be posted on halloween but tumblr deleted it!! so I had to rewrite it :((( so I'm sorry that this is so late and so terrible!! I tried my best to rewrite it like it was fr. i do genuinely hate this now, i’m sorry.
summary — eddie comes back after a week and sees you in your angel costume. he has to fuck you right then and there.
warnings/tags — fem!afab!reader, she/her pronouns, smut, mdni, piv, fingering, needy!reader
wc — 1.8k
“Steve, have you seen Eddie yet?” You stand on your tiptoes to get closer to his face, leaning over the breakfast bar that separates the two of you. 
Steve probably yells too eagerly. The music is loud, but you’re not exactly far away, “Y/N like I said fifteen minutes ago, he’ll be here at 9 o’clock.” 
“What’s the time?” You laugh. Winding Steve up is always fun. 
Steve sighs like he’s annoyed. You know he’s really not, “8:45.” 
“Awesome. I’m gonna go sit on the couch until he gets here.” You tell him before spinning on your heels. The feathers of your angel wings tickle his face as you turn and Steve wrinkles his nose. 
“I’m sure you will, Y/N!” he calls before you turn the corner. 
And you do exactly that. You’ve waited for Eddie to get back all week, what’s fifteen more minutes? By the time Eddie arrives, the wiry angel wings on your back have grown a little itchy. You’d take them off if you weren’t excited to show Eddie your costume. 
Picking at a loose thread on your frilly, white skirt, you don’t even notice the pair of knees in ripped, black denim, hovering over your own. Eddie leans forward to nudge your leg with his and you startle. 
“Hey, sweetheart.” Eddie does that signature smile of his, it almost fries your brain and you forget to react. 
“Oh my god, Eds!” It’s a blur of feathers when you leap from the small couch. Pushing your arms over his shoulders and leaning your whole weight into him. He almost topples when he wraps his own arms around your back. “Eddie,” 
Eddie’s mouth finds its home in the juncture of your neck like it always does, breathing in your lost scene and pressing his lips to your skin. “Y/N.”
He pulls away, but not before you give him one last squeeze, holding you out at arm's length. “God, baby. You look so fucking hot,” he groans. 
You turn your hips until your skirt swishes, “You think?” 
Eddie reaches around to fiddle with one of the feathers, smoothing it out between his thumb and pointer. “Shit, yeah.”
“Where’s your costume?” you ask, poking him in the chest until he rocks on the balls of his feet. Heavy boots thump along with the bass of the music. 
“I’m in it,” he laughs. 
“Yeah?” 
Eddie swishes like you did but the only thing that moves is his leather jacket that stiffly flaps around his waist, “Yeah. Your boyfriend.”
You roll your eyes like you’re actually not amused by his answer, “You wear that every day.” 
“Well, you haven’t seen me in it for an entire week.” He leans in to peck your cheek. Twice for good measure. You grasp his jacket in firm hands and hold him close.
You hum, “Yeah. Missed you.” 
Eddie leans in again to snake his arms around to give your ass a squeeze, bunching your skirt in his hands. You’ve forgotten where you are for a moment when he says, “Wanna show me how much you missed me?” 
Pretending to act like you don’t want Eddie more than anything at this moment would be harder than telling him exactly what you want — so you don’t. You run a hand down his chest, over the cotton of his shirt, feeling the bumps and divots tentatively until your reach his waist. Hooking a finger around a belt loop to tug him closer. 
“I think I do.” you smile. 
Eddie groans, “Shit,” 
You can’t even pretend to be surprised at how quickly it takes Eddie to drag you to the nearest bathroom. His insatiable need has you giggling the entire way there. Pushing through strangers and ignoring the pointed look Robin shoots you from the bottom of the stairs.
Once you’re inside, Eddie fumbles with the lock on the door while you tug at his free arm, “C’mon, Eds,” you whine.
Eddie cheers when he gets the door to lock, turning to lift you up and onto the basin. The ceramics are cold where it touches the bare skin on your legs and you gasp. Eddie is quick to catch any noise with his mouth when he leans in to kiss you.
“Fuck,” kiss, “angel,” kiss, “you look so hot.”
Your laughter peels from within you and you’re huffing into his mouth, “I thought I was the one who was supposed to be showing you how much I missed you.”
He pulls away to lift your skirt up so it pools around your waist, tugging your panties down until they stretch over your knees, “Just sit there looking all pretty, that’s enough for me, baby.”
Eddie lets you do as you please, placing a firm grip to stable yourself on his shoulders when he traces the tip of his finger up your slit. Grazing down to your entrance to gather the slick that’s already begun to pool on the counter.
“So messy,” he coos, exploring with his finger to push through your pudgy folds, “Missed this pussy, angel.” 
You lean forward to press the top of your head into his shoulder, wrapping a hand around his bicep. When he finally slips a finger inside you, you let out the tiniest gasp and your hand tightens in its grip until the leather of his jacket squeaks. 
You angle your head up to leave a line of lazy kisses along his neck. Your hot breath and tiny gasps are a whisper against Eddie’s skin. He pushes a second finger in, now middle and marriage, and you hiccup against his skin. Eddie pushes in further, determined to get you to make more pretty noises that get him all worked up. 
“Eds,” you pant uselessly. More tiny gasps. 
“Y/N,” he almost mocks, exploring deeper inside your weeping hole. Slick traces down his palm and threatens to dirty his sleeve. If Eddie has ever cared about that, he’s never shown it. 
You rock your hips against the bench to try and get closer to his hand, his palm pushing into your clit. The stickiness of his thumb and pinky thudding against your skin echo in the tiny bathroom. 
Eddie can sense your neediness, “Slow down, baby.” 
You grip the hair around the base of his neck which only causes him to groan out. “Need,” you pant. 
“What d‘you need, hmm?” Eddie asks, pulling back to check you over. Using his free hand to brush the hair from your eyes. You blink at him slowly. 
“Fuck me, Eddie. Please.” Your eyes are terribly pleading and Eddie stills, deep-seated inside you. “Missed you- need you, Eds.” 
Eddie can see you working yourself up and kisses you on the highest part of your cheek. Pulling his hand from you he says, “Yeah? Need my cock?” 
“Please.” 
“You’re so, very polite,” he coos.
There’s a metal zzz of his zipper unravelling and the shushing of his jeans being pushed down just below his ass, before he’s tugging at his cock with familiarity. A familiarity that has your stomach aching. 
Eddie wraps his wet hand around the fat of your thigh to tug you closer to the edge of the basin and you yelp, bracing yourself on his chest. 
Once you’re close enough, the ruddy tip of his cock presses into your clit and you jolt, head lulling into the juncture of his neck. Eddie wraps his arms around your back and holds you close, dotting kisses over your clavicle. His teeth scrape and nip playfully until goosebumps raise your skin. 
“Ready?” he asks as he runs his cock down your slit to line up with your entrance. 
“Uh-“ you stutter, wrapping your legs around his waist, hooking your ankles together, “Uh-huh.” 
Eddie sinks in and you have to squeeze your eyes shut. “That’s it,” he groans, breath trembling, “Fuck.”
You squeeze him closer like it’s possible and gasp when the air is forced from your lungs at the proximity. Your hands tremble around stiff leather and your hips ache when he rocks in to the hilt. Filling you completely. 
“Ah — Eddie,” you gasp, harder when he’s rocking in stronger. 
Eddie starts to move, slow and tentatively, rolling his hips into your wet heat. Spreading your legs further apart and your underwear slips down onto the floor.
“Please,” you plead, “harder.” You dig your knees into his side. 
Eddie grips your thigh to hold it up and closer to him and when he feels as if he’s not hitting the right angle, he hooks his arms under both of your legs to lift you from the counter. 
Gasping, you sink down onto him, keeping your arms and ankles hooked around his body. 
Eddie moves to grasp at your ass, squeezing fat between his fingers to keep you upright. Lifting you up and you help him settle back down until you find a perfect rhythm. 
“So,” Eddie grunts, hard to be heard over the sounds of skin slapping and your pitched-up moans. You’re also lucky the music outside is loud enough to muffle anything. “so wet, sweetheart.” 
You hum what sounds like an uh-huh, trying your best to meet his movements. Eddie’s grip is tight and it stings. Pain turns to pleasure when he starts to hit the spongy spot deep inside you. 
Eddie’s doing his best to fuck you onto him. Especially when your pelvis burns and your arms ache, going limp against his frame. 
His grunts mix in with your Ah ah ah’s, Eddie has no free hands to smother your noises so he plants his lips to yours, catching any sounds. 
“Eddie,” you say against his lips, hot and wet, “M’gonna…” 
“Cum f’me, baby,” he says, speeding up. 
When he’s repeatedly hitting your sweet spot at the perfect rhythm, the coil in your core snaps, bleeding through your abdomen until you’re clamping around Eddie—tensing up in his hold. 
Weak and panty, Eddie throws you back down to the basin, hips stuttering inside you. 
“Fuck, where can I?” 
“Inside,” you say. No, beg. 
“You sure?” he groans. 
You nod your head, clamping your twitching walls around him and that’s all it takes. Dragging, now slowly through your gummy heat, his own cum sobbing from your hole when he’s finished. 
He’s pulling out, slowly when he watches your face crumple, keeping your legs hooked around his sides. Placing a wet kiss against your damp hairline, he says, “That was amazing- You’re amazing.” 
“I know,” you grin, resting your legs down until your knees click. 
“Mmm,” he kisses you again, “M’never leaving for that long, ever again.” 
“Never,” you agree. 
There’s a beat, that’s not very silent, filled with the party that’s still thrumming. Loud chants and chatter fill the bathroom from the crack under the door. 
“We should really go home,” he says. 
“I think so,” you hum, “I think I heard about ten people knocking on the door.”
“Shit,” Eddie snorts. 
“Shit.”
1K notes · View notes
cassidymb121 · 1 month
Text
OMG It’s You..
Youtube! reader x Stray Kids
Summary: Y/N’s YouTube channel is taking off after her reactions to Stray Kids MV God’s Menu. Now she’s making videos nonstop along with working a full time job. What would happen if she got offered a job of a lifetime and met the boys of her succession?
Warning: None
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Y/N’s POV
I don’t think people understand just how exhausting life can be. ‘Not to mention expensive too.’ I thought to myself. When I got home I greeted my family before dumping my stuff by the front door then headed to my room. I collapsed on the bed and let out a huge sigh. I didn’t want to get up because of how exhausted I was but I needed to edit some of my videos I’ve made in the last couple of days. I dreaded doing it because I lost some of my footage due to me falling asleep at the computer. How I did it exactly is a mystery to me, all I know is I tried to find it and got frustrated with myself for letting it happen.
I got up and started moving about the room. I needed to get changed and get a shower before I started working. As I was in the shower I started reflecting on my YouTube channel. I’m an introvert as most people would say. I don’t socialize much with others unless I’m at work where I have to, but I usually mind my own business unless I hear gossip then I’m interested. I debated whether if it was a good idea to start a channel since I didn’t think I was very entertaining, but the fans that follow me proved me wrong.
You see I grew up in the South where I listened to Country music along with some Pop and occasional Hip Hop or R&B. When I first heard K-pop music it was odd at first but over time I came to really enjoy it. Which brings me to where I am now, listening to K-pop music and rating the group’s albums from my perspective and reacting to videos of them being silly. Stray Kids found their way into my heart one day and since then they’ve become a part of my life.
After getting refreshed, I go into the kitchen to find something to eat since my stomach made a gurgling noise. I decided on a sandwich and some chips. After making my food I head back to my room and start up my computer and monitors. I started the channel back in 2020 around the time Stray Kids released their SKZ2020 album, that’s been a little over a year now. I knew from the start that doing a reaction channel probably wouldn’t go viral right away, but after some time more people started to find my channel and following me. Especially after my reaction to God’s Menu MV. Even to the point where they were excited for new videos to come out.
I always worried that people wouldn’t like my videos, but then I would see all the positive comments and smile that I made someone’s day better. I used that positivity to keep me going, doesn’t mean that I didn’t get hate here or there but there were a lot of people who stood up for me. That would always make my day better.
‘Focus Y/N. You still have to finish these two videos so you can start making more for next week.’ I shook my head and got working on my videos that I already recorded. ‘I need to re-record what I deleted so that I can finish editing this video. Man I still can’t believe I did that.’ I got to work on the one I didn’t mess up first before going to the second one. I pulled my camera towards me and turning it on. I pulled up the previous videos I had watched from that evening before doing my intro.
“Hello Lovelies and welcome back to the channel. So, as you will see I’m dressed different from my previous video. Reason being is that I deleted some footage and now I’m having to re-record where I left off. So, let’s get started shall we.”
——————————————————————
Third Person POV
The boys were taking a small break from practice. They’ve been going at it for days it seemed like, even if it were only a couple of hours. As each one of them found a place to relax, Felix was watching a video on YouTube.
“How many times have you watched that same video?” Felix looked up to see his other half looking at his screen with his eyebrows raised. “I can’t help it. She’s very relatable, super sweet, and I love her accent. Plus she’s beautiful and has gorgeous y/e/c eyes.” Hyunjin sits down beside Felix. “Okay okay I get it, you love everything about Y/N. It’s not like you’re the only one though.” Hyunjin takes a moment to look at the rest of his members. “I’m sure you’re not the only one that likes her. We all have seen her videos and like her just the same as you, if not more.” Felix sighs. “I know. I guess some days I enjoy watching her videos because they make me smile. Especially when some days are harder than others. Her videos comfort me like a warm hug on a cold day.” Felix smiles thinking about it while Hyunjin smiles at him, understanding where he comes from.
He remembers when they first found Y/N’s videos. During Chan’s room, there were some Stays that told Chan to look her up and watch her videos. It didn’t happen right away but over time after Stays were persistent on them watching her, they found that they enjoyed her videos as well. Maybe even more than Stays even if they don’t show it. Each member has there own favorite episodes of Y/N as well as their favorite qualities of her. Chan likes how motherly she acts, especially when it comes to Stays asking her questions on certain topics. Lee Minho likes how she can understand and speak Korean. Even go as far as to have subtitles in Korean for people who don’t understand English that well.
Changbin likes her laugh, especially when its uncontrollable laughter. It makes him want to laugh with her. Hyunjin likes how creative she can be with her edits. Han Jisung likes how uncharacteristically funny she can be without trying. Felix like her smile, he thinks it’s her most charming point. Seungmin likes her sassy/blunt side. He thinks that’s the funniest part of her personality. Jeongin likes her whole personality in general. He knows he could see her as an older sister if he ever met her.
Each member knew that if they ever met her in person that she would get along with them. “SHE JUST POSTED A NEW VIDEO!” All of the boys looked in the direction of the voice they heard. All scrambling to get over to Felix who had called them. “Well what are you waiting for? Play the video!” Changbin shouts as Felix presses play on his phone.
(Terrible title but it’s all I could come up with lol. Hope you all like it! I’m trying something new so who knows how far I’ll go with this one. I’ll try to update as much as I can. Thanks!)
Taglist: @laylasbunbunny
83 notes · View notes
gyu-effect · 1 year
Text
(tryna do) what lovers do || y.jh
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"WE ARE JUST TRYNA DO WHAT LOVERS DO”
PAIRING || Jeonghan x Female Reader
GENRES || Fake Dating AU, College AU, Humour, Fluff, Friends To Lovers AU, Rich Kids AU
SUMMARY || When you had roped Jeonghan into your idea of being a ‘pretend’ couple, you did not expect the lie to grow this big. What was supposed to be a one day thing soon became a rather frequent occurrence. And the gravity of the situation did not really hit you until your parents were requesting an audience with your new ‘boyfriend’. Will the two of you be able to keep your act till then?
Or, in which, you keep promising yourself that this would be the last day you pretend to have feelings for Yoon Jeonghan.
SERIES MASTERLIST || teen, age
MUSIC || What Lover Do by Maroon 5 and SZA
WARNINGS || Joshua being a menace to the society, one mention of threesome as a joke (I really tried to keep it sfw but this was inevitable really sorry), drunk Jeonghan, a make out scene, probably very wrong elite party etiquettes (don’t come at me pls), a bit of swearing
WORD COUNT || 15k
A/N || As much as I was dying to write this fic, a lot of times I had to stop it because the flow was so bad. I hope it doesn’t affect the outcome so do tell me what you guys think about it! I would love to hear all of your opinions about it! Also for better understanding, Jeonghan’ suit was the one he wore for Don’t Lie Series Pt.2!
TAGLIST || @fragmentof-indifference @millielovescheol @jkbabiey @kokoiinuts @alyssng​ @cecedrake2217 @dr3aluv5 @romeosbreastmilk @y00nzin0      [thank you for being interested! if you wanted to be added to the series taglist or my general taglist, send me an ask!]
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“Oh my god, why am I even here?” You sobbed to yourself, as you frantically turned the pages of the thick textbook, searching desperately for anything that could help you in your project. Despite being in the library for the past four hours, you had managed to write only two pages of your five page essay. You cursed yourself mentally for picking such a difficult topic in an attempt to be different from others.
“To get your degree and a job that will secure your future?” Seungkwan replied, as though he hadn’t been complaining about his own work a minute ago.
“Thanks. I wasn’t really sure before why I applied for college but now I definitely am.” You muttered, squeezing your eyes shut as you closed your laptop. As the semester was approaching the end, all the project deadlines had clogged up your calendar and you were pathetically struggling to finish everything on time. 
“You did not ask yourself this question when you were at the party yesterday.” He reminded you, causing you to open your eyes and glare at him. 
“I’ve been to a maximum of three parties throughout this entire semester minus our initiation party. How much more do you want me to quit? If I don’t let out my stress in some way or the other I’m going to combust.”
“Lies. You hate these parties and your stress busting mechanism is to go shopping with Kim Yeri.”
You raised your hands in defeat, but still stuck out your tongue at your best friend. Just because he was right didn’t mean you couldn’t complain and whine to him. 
“Speaking of parties,” he continued after shutting his laptop and looking at you, “What are you going to do about the one next week?”
You stared at him.
“Next week? What party?”
“Min Seolah’s party? She sent an invitation to you?” 
“Ah,” you said, vaguely remembering something in your inbox which you might have deleted out of anger at your pending work. “I just won’t go. Where’s it taking place? Her apartment?”
Now it was Seungkwan’s turn to stare at you.
“You didn’t go through the invitation did you?” He glared at you when you smiled sheepishly at him. “It’s an elite party. And you are expected to have an escort. In more polite terms, a date.” 
You felt your smile dip as soon as you heard the word ‘elite’. You absolutely hated these formal parties. More than boring, they were painful beyond words and talking with all the powerful delegates who were usually present there always exhausted you mentally. 
“Can’t I- can’t we excuse ourselves?”
“Our parents will be there.”
That line hit you like a truck and you finally felt the realisation sink in. “Oh my god. Oh my god, Seungkwan. I-I need to pick a dress! And shoes! And-And an escort! Where the hell am I supposed to get a date?” Even Seungkwan didn’t seem to have an answer for this. You continued your rambling as the panic finally settled in properly. “Oh god. How does one, who had next to zero social interactions outside her friend circle, manage to find a date in less than a week? And how are you so calm about this? Do you want to pretend to be each other’s escorts? Everyone knows there’s nothing between us anyways.”
“Er, about that.” Seungkwan began, awkwardly scratching his neck. “I already have a date.”
For the second time that day, Boo Seungkwan had dropped another bomb on you. You closed your mouth that had been hanging open and edged your chair closer to his suspiciously.
“Wait, what? When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me anything?”
“It happened just right before I came into the library!” He began, clearly flustered as he was avoiding your gaze and aimlessly flipping the pages of the book in front of him (it was actually your book, a subject he didn’t even have). “Sowon just- just randomly asked whether I wanted to go with her because she thought I was cool and I was so taken aback, I said yes without even thinking-”
“Is that all it takes to ask you out? Just tell you that you are cool?” You asked, leaning back and grinning at your furiously blushing best friend. You had seen Seungkwan embarrassed (and had sometimes even been the cause of it), but to see him this shy because of some girl from economics seemed worthy to make fun of. In the back of your mind, you made a mental note to tell this to Chan. 
“Are you worried about that? Shouldn’t you be worried about your lack of date, instead?” 
“Yeah…But I’ve got to finish this assignment before.” You always had your priorities right, and getting a degree was definitely one of them. “And I’m hungry.”
“It’s almost lunch time. Want to grab something from the canteen?” Seungkwan asked, checking his watch. You nodded and both of you packed up your things, walking out into the sunlight after what felt like an eternity of being in the dark library. 
No sooner had you stepped out of the threshold, you felt a gush of wind from behind you that nearly knocked you over, but Seungkwan wasn’t that lucky. He stumbled onto the ground as that gush of wind (now identified as Kwon Soonyoung) grabbed him by the collar and pulled him up. Or rather yanked him up.
“Hey! Do you want to die?” Seungkwan yelled, as you blinked and tried to process what had just happened. Then feeling a smile tug at the corner of your lips at the sight of Soonyoung nervously apologising to Seungkwan, you gently patted the latter’s back.
“Are you okay?” You asked, his neck visibly red at the sudden tugging of his shirt collar. 
“I highly doubt you should be smiling while asking me that?”
“I- okay I’m sorry.” By now you were grinning. “Drink some water, you should be fine. And Soonyoung, why the hell did you try to knock us out?”
“I wasn’t trying to! I just wanted to surprise Seungkwan from behind but I guess I ran a bit too fast.”
“A bit?” Seungkwan was still massaging his neck. “I bet you would have told that excuse to the judges for attempted murder after getting arrested because my head got dislocated from my spine.”
“Anyways, what do you think they are serving us for lunch?” Soonyoung asked, hastily changing the subject.
Before you or Seungkwan could reply, all of a sudden you realised you had left your jacket on the chair in the library. “Uh, guys I’ll catch up with you in the mess? I left my jacket behind.”
“You don’t want us to wait for you?” Seungkwan asked but you shook your head in negative.
“It’s fine. But don’t forget to save me a seat or else I’ll steal all your tiger plushies Soonyoung.”
Soonyoung faked a look of horror, pulling Seungkwan and breaking into a run. This earned an eye roll from Seungkwan as he waved you goodbye. Giggling at their retreating figure you went back inside the library. Thankfully, it was still there and slipping into it, you quickly walked out again. 
This time when you walked out, you found yourself staring at the couple underneath the willow tree near the library. It was still full of leaves despite it being almost autumn. It was almost cute to see the couple until you remembered your own position; you had to find a date before the week ended.
The sun glared on you and you instinctively took a step back, immediately colliding with someone. The two of you let out an ‘ah!’ as you stumbled back more before you felt the person’s hands on your shoulder, stabilising you.
“I’m so sorry!” You gushed, turning back to look at the person. You found yourself looking up at Yoon Jeonghan’s equally surprised face as he helped you up. “Jeonghan, shit, I’m so sorry. I should have looked.”
“It’s fine. I’m fine. Are you okay? Don’t walk backwards like that, you might get hurt. Unless, you have Mad-Eye Moody's eyes.” He joked casually and you smiled sheepishly at him. 
Jeonghan was a good friend of yours; he was in your close friends circle and you thoroughly enjoyed his presence (as long as you weren’t the one getting pranked). He also happened to be smart and handsome, a plus point which made him a campus heartthrob. As you took in his appearance, you noticed he had grown out his hair a bit. A gentle wind blew against the two of you and his hair ruffled slightly, sunlight catching his face as he grinned at you.
And then, it struck you.
“What? What’s wrong?” He asked, as you stared at him, your mouth slightly open. “Don’t tell me there’s sauce on my face and Joshua didn’t tell me about it.”
That snapped you back to the present and you shook your head. “Er, no. Um, Jeonghan?” 
“Yeah?”
You knew for sure he had been invited to the same upscale party as you, but you had to make sure before asking him.
“You don’t have a significant other, do you? Or maybe a crush?”
Now it was time for him to stare at you.
“Uh…no? Where is this coming from?”
“Then do you want to date me?”
Jeonghan stared at you for a good few seconds, as though trying to find out if you were joking. Immediately you realised how sudden you sounded and quickly corrected yourself, while grabbing his arm to calm him down. “I mean, would you like to be my escort for Min Seolha’s party? That is, if you still don’t have anyone?”
“Oh.” Jeonghan laughed awkwardly, before patting your hand. “But you know, you are supposed to get a potential partner as your escort. I mean…”
His voice trailed off and you dropped your hand, feeling slightly embarrassed. You were a bit disappointed, but you could understand where he was coming from and you definitely did not want to pressurise him.
“Ah, of course I understand! Forget I asked. It’s just that, I don’t have anyone in my mind right now so I thought if anyone who was comfortable with me was willing to go-”
“I’m not uncomfortable with you!” He exclaimed, grabbing your hand. “I just- I just thought maybe you would want to go with someone you like. Or…yeah, damn. You are right. Even I don’t have anyone in mind and I definitely can’t find anyone in a week.”
“If it makes you too uncomfortable going with a friend, we can pretend to be a couple.”
The words were out of your mouth before you even thought about it but it was too late to take it back. Jeonghan looked taken aback and you were going to apologise to him once more but instead he nodded at your plan. 
“Oh yeah, that sounds like a good idea. It won’t even raise any odd questions.” 
You didn’t expect Jeonghan to agree to your plan so quickly, let alone the last part so all you could was a flustered laugh. This earned a soft smile from him as he asked you, “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.” You lied. “Don’t tell me later on it’s a prank, okay?”
His smile fell a little as he pouted at you, immediately causing you to wince at your words. “Hey, just because I cheat at games doesn’t mean I play with people’s emotions.” 
“I know, I know. I was just joking. You are an angel, Jeonghan.” It was true though. He was a very sweet friend and always took care of those around him. In fact at get-togethers, he was always the one who made sure everyone had enough food. He helped with notes or anything related to studies. You did know that he was a really nice person, except when he was trying to be a menace to the society.
“By the way, do we have any rules or something?” He asked.
“Rules?”
“We need to make this a little believable right? Or else people are going to easily realise that we just agreed to be each other's date because we couldn’t find anyone and honestly, that’s a bit embarrassing.” 
“Yeah.” You scratched your neck, not having thought this far. What he was saying was true, if this plan backfired you both could become a laughing stock and the last thing you need in your already full plate was another lecture from your parents.” “Yeah, I think we do.” 
“Then do you want to have lunch in my room?”
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“It’s a good thing you got the dorm closest to the library.” You said sarcastically, as you entered his room and finally caught your breath. You collapsed onto his sofa, mentally cursing the building planner for putting the library near the entrance of the campus and some of the boys’ dormitories at the other end. Jeonghan flopped down beside you, equally out of breath despite doing this for quite some time now. 
“Hey, it could have been worse. I could have got an apartment outside the campus and who knows, we might have still been travelling by bus just to get to my place.”
“That’s true.” You grumbled. “But in that case, we would have just gone to my dorm.” 
“I’ll need a special pass to enter the girls’ dorm.�� He groaned. “I wish our college wasn’t so strict for first years. Anyways, we should-”
“Hey, have you seen my shampoo?”
A new voice came into the living room and you turned towards it, just to find yourself staring at a half-naked Hong Joshua, standing in front of the bedroom door with just a towel around his torso. You felt your cheek burn as you took in his dripping torso, muscles flexing with almost the slightest movement. At first he hadn’t noticed you but then his eyes locked with yours, causing you to realise what you were doing.
But before you could even look away, you felt Jeonghan’s hands practically slam into your face, covering your eyes from the (amazing) sight you were staring at.
“Hey!” Jeonghan yelped, his voice an octave higher as he too sounded flustered by this. “Why did you come out without checking if anyone was even there? You heard her voice right?”
“I-I- I did not expect-” Joshua stammered and you interrupted him.
“I’m sorry!” You squeaked, still recovering. “I’m sorry that I looked!”
“Uh, no. I shouldn’t have- I should- Yeah, I should just go. Catch up with you guys later!”
Once you heard the bedroom door slam shut, Jeonghan removed his hand from your eyes. You looked at him and he still seemed shocked, and even a bit embarrassed.
“I’m sorry you had to see that.” He muttered, clearing his throat as he poured out a cup of water for you. You took the cup from his hand with a small thank you, glad that you had something to cool yourself down.
“No. I’m sorry. I should have immediately looked away.”
“It was sudden.” Jeonghan said, as though understanding you completely. He still seemed unable to meet your eyes, and was busy rearranging the coasters kept on the coffee table in front of you, despite them being already arranged properly. Somehow looking at the Yoon Jeonghan like this set off the devilish side inside you. 
“Does Joshua work out everyday?” You asked casually.
“He does. Not only does he have a gym membership, he also has some stuff in his room.” Jeonghan replied, without missing a beat. He seemed to have regained his composure because he smiled at you and asked, “Why? having second thoughts about me and want to go for Joshua?”
“What?” You spluttered over your water, your time to be taken aback. “I- I would never-”
“Relax, I’m just joking. If you are with him, your ears might drop because of him singing ‘Sunday morning, rain is falling’. Who knows, he probably went back to get showered on because it’s not raining today. It is Sunday, after all.”
You stared at him, trying to make which part was real and which wasn’t. Even though his smile was genuine, you had fallen for his tricks quite a few times and you knew better not to trust that angelic smile. But having a proper one on one conversation with him made you realise how convincing he was.
“Er, let’s go back to why I came here. I think we should make some boundaries so that neither of us are uncomfortable with each other and also some points which might convince people we are dating.”
“Right.” Jeonghan said, magically conjuring up a paper and pen from somewhere. “So first of all, I think we should decide on pet names.”
You paused, trying to think of something plausible for him. For some reason, the very thought of having to call him baby or sweetheart in public was making you cringe (and you were sure he would too) so you thought of something that he won't mind being called and at the same time showed your closeness.
Before you could tell him your thoughts, the bedroom door opened once again and Joshua walked out (this time fully clothed and dry). He pulled a chair and sat himself opposite to both of you, giving you an awkward smile.
“Let me apologise again. I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable or something.” He said. You shook your head, before giving him your apology too.
“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have stared.” Joshua nodded as though accepting your apology and then pointed at the paper in Jeonghan’s hand. “What are you both up to?”
“We are dating.”
“We are pretending to be a couple”
The two of you said it at the same time, and you felt dumb. You knew Jeonghan and Joshua were best friends but you didn’t expect Jeonghan to tell him this immediately. Letting out an awkward laughter at Joshua, you turned towards Jeonghan who was looking at you surprised.
“I’m sorry, was I not supposed to tell this?” He asked and you quietly grumbled. It wasn’t that you weren’t going to tell Seungkwan either, but you thought maybe it would be after you and Jeonghan had finalised everything and you had sorted your thoughts.
“Er, it’s fine.” You said hastily as Joshua got up to leave. “I think it’s better if you could help us too.” He smiled and sat down, looking excited as though the three of you were planning to pull the greatest prank of all time.
“Joshua’s an expert in this department.” Jeonghan said, and you turned to look at him. His eyes were practically shining as he smiled innocently at his roommate. Looking at him like this, you felt a smile tug at the corner of your lips, something infectious about his childishness.
“What do you mean?”
“He’s just exaggerating.” Joshua said, rolling his eyes. “You know how to flirt as much as I do.”
“Then what do you suggest I should call Y/N?”
“To be honest, I think it would be better if you just call her by her name.” Joshua said, actually thinking hard about it. “Your voice kind of goes soft when you are talking to your loved ones though, so maybe try that instead with Y/N’s name.” 
“Hey Joshua. People call you Josh, right?” You asked very seriously, leaning towards him a bit. He nodded and you continued. “Then should I call you Shua?”
“Hey! We are deciding pet names for each other! Not for you and Joshua!” Jeonghan protested, though he was laughing at your seriousness. Joshua laughed too and gave you a thumbs up, causing you to lean back into the couch, satisfied. 
Then turning towards Jeonghan you said, “Do you mind if I call you Hannie?” 
He cocked his head towards the side as his eyes widened a little. But this time he didn’t look surprised, instead he looked genuinely curious as to why you picked that name, silently urging you to go on.
You felt your cheeks tingle with heat a little at the way he was looking at you attentively, so you quickly took a sip of your water before continuing. “Well, like Joshua said you kind of speak softly with people you are very comfortable with. So I felt…Hannie suited you a lot. I think it’s soft enough to suit you.” You said sheepishly.
“I thought you were calling me Shua?” Joshua interrupted, an evil glint in his eyes. You immediately knew he was going to pull your leg so you decided to play along. “I was joking. I use pet names only for my beloved boyfriend.”
You stressed on the ‘beloved boyfriend’ part and looked at Jeonghan. He was busy scribbling something on the paper but when he heard you accentuate that part, he looked up, eyes flicking between you and Joshua as the whole room stared at him. He looked surprised (this seemed to be the only response you could get out of him today) but nonetheless when his eyes landed on yours, he smiled at you softly.
Sunlight glided into the room through their partially open balcony, throwing light on Jeonghan and giving him almost an angelic glow. His eyes curved into half moons as he smiled at you, his long hair falling in front of his eyes a little. For the first time you noticed how delicate his features were, like he was a beautiful statue but carved in glass. 
You felt your heart stutter a little and you frowned. Looking at the glass of water in your hand, you emptied it one go. Maybe you weren’t drinking enough water? It was afternoon and it had been quite some time since you left your dorm.
“Oh, sorry! I promised you lunch right?” Jeonghan exclaimed, thinking you drank all the water because you were hungry. Before you could respond, he had already gotten up, walking towards some sheafs of pamphlets kept on their tv cabinet. “You like braised chicken, don’t you?”
You blinked at him, surprised. “How did you know that?”
“You always order that when we all eat out.” Jeonghan stated causally. He began flipping all the pamphlets, then finding one particular restaurant’s, he took out his phone and dialled the number. Was Jeonghan always this attentive?
“What about you?” You asked Joshua. He got up and sat beside you. “Jeonghan knows what I usually order. So, can I ask you a question?”
Through the corner of your eyes you saw Jeonghan slip into his bedroom. “Sure, go ahead Shua.”
He grinned at you and leaned in closer, until you could smell the faint scent of his soap. You saw his eyes change to seriousness as his voice dropped a little before asking, “Can I ask why are you and Jeonghan doing this?”
“Oh.” It was out of your mouth before you could stop yourself. Here you thought he was going to either flirt with you or let you in on a serious secret about Jeonghan but instead he asked this. You laughed awkwardly to cover up your flusteredness. What are you thinking, Y/N? You are with Jeonghan now! This isn’t the time to think about his best friend and roommate! “Ah, it’s just that we need an escort to Min Seolah’s party next week so me and Jeonghan decided to pretend we are a couple just so that we can be each other’s escort.”
“Ah, then were you open to anyone you were comfortable with?”
“Yeah, as long as the other person too was comfortable with it. It kind of just popped out of my mouth, to be honest.”
He scrunched his nose a little, as though regretting something. “I wish I was there instead of Jeonghan then.”
You blinked at his words, trying to process what he had just said. Had the Hong Joshua said he wished it was him in a fake relationship with you? Sure the two of you were friends but still, it did nothing to stop the sudden whooping feeling in your stomach.
“Too bad it was me then.”
You turned to see Jeonghan leaning against his door frame, grinning at the two of you indicating that he was joking. Immediately you felt guilt clutch at your throat. You had roped Yoon Jeonghan into your proposition of dating but here you were now, flirting with his close friend. 
Joshua, on the other hand, seemed unfazed about it. If anything, he looked amused as he leaned back into the couch lazily, studying Jeonghan’s expression.
“Anyways, they’ll deliver in half an hour's time. Come on, Y/N. We’ve got a lot to discuss.”
“What else?” He was suddenly so serious that you were taken aback slightly. 
“We need to talk about physical touch and kissing too, of course.”
“Kissing?!” 
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“So did you two discuss about kissing?” Kim Yeri, your roommate, asked as you threw your face into your pillow to muffle your scream.
“No, I ran out of there before we even got started on that topic. Talking about physical touch itself was so embarrassing, I thought I would die if we started talking about kissing. He’s so serious about it. Why did I even suggest such a thing?” 
“Desperate times call for desperate measures, bestie.” Yeri said comfortingly, patting your back.
“I mean, he’s so nice to me. I feel like…I feel like I’m using him or something.”
“Then don’t use him. Use this opportunity to…ah, you know, get a boyfriend.” You glared at the girl sitting on your bed and she winked at you, causing you to get up and smack her lightly with a pillow.
“No way! This is just an act! How shallow am I to fall for a man who agreed to pretend to be my boyfriend?”
Yeri shrugged, as though it wasn’t a big deal. “Happens all the time in movies. Besides, Yoon Jeonghan isn’t that bad, is he? He’s funny, friendly, handsome and smart. He’s so fucking pretty too. Everyone loves his jokes and pranks.”
“Yeah, as long as you aren’t the one getting pranked.” You muttered, eyes darting to your phone. He had told you to message him once you reached and you had done, but he still hadn’t even read it yet. You mulled Yeri’s thoughts in your head. She was right, Jeonghan was pretty. You had always known that but somehow seeing him against the sunlight made you see him in a different light. Quite Literally. 
“So when’s your next date?”
“It’s not a date…” You began, but stopped when Yeri raised an eyebrow at you. “Fine, we are just going shopping to buy some ‘couple’ things.”
“Sounds like a rather cute date to me.”
“Yeri!”
How the rest of the evening and the next day passed by quickly was shocking to you (you wished time passed this quickly during statistics class but no, time and you had to have a beef with time). You had let Seungkwan into your plan and he had also sworn that he wouldn’t tell it to anyone, even if he was being threatened with not being able to drink iced americano for an entire year (a threat you were highly tempted to try out but alas, you loved your best friend too much). But he was a committed best friend. Seungkwan had even written down some points to make your relationship more realistic and you had hastily stuffed it down your coat’s pocket, so that you could show it to Jeonghan later on.
Very soon, you found yourself and Jeonghan seated on the sofa of the high end boutique near to your college, waiting for the attendants to attend to you both. You were a regular customer here due to your trips with Yeri and even sometimes with Seungkwan, so the shop assistant knew you from before. They had greeted you with their usual friendly smile they always gave you, until their eyes landed on Jeonghan, travelling down to your entwined hands.
Jeonghan had insisted that the two of you hold hands when you enter the shop, saying that it would be a practice. At first you were a bit uncertain, but then he reminded you that it was ideal for your boyfriend to take you shopping, and that shop assistants did not gossip much. You were still not sure about it but nonetheless slipped your hand in his.
His bony fingers grasped your gently as he gave you a smile, pulling you into the boutique with him. Despite his hand being cold, you felt your fingers tingle underneath his touch, a sensation you kept feeling even after he had let go of your hand. 
The attendants looked a bit too elated as they ushered you and Jeonghan into a room, telling they’ll be right back to attend the two of you.
Presently, Jeonghan was bobbing his legs beside you, both of your knees brushing against each other slightly. He seemed unfazed by this and so should have been you, but for some reason this made you hyper aware of your both’s closeness. You could smell his cologne, making you realise you had never really gone shopping with another man who wasn’t, well, Seungkwan. 
It also made you wonder whether he had done this before with someone else. He looked so experienced, the way he just casually checked over some of the items displayed, as though he had a habit of buying what caught his eyes for his significant other.
“Have you done this before?” You asked, and he looked at you confused, blinking as though asking you to elaborate. “I mean,” you said after clearing your throat. For some reason you were feeling very awkward asking him this, almost feeling the heat tingle on your cheeks. “Have you gone on a date to the boutique to buy couple clothes?” 
“Ah, no. This is my first time actually.” He said with a soft smile. You felt relief settle in you as you automatically smiled back at him, before catching yourself. What are you doing? You screamed internally, wondering why Jeonghan was so soft with you. 
You realised that the way he smiled and the way he talked to you had always given you this mad urge to melt right then and there in front of him, as though you just couldn't bring yourself to be harsh with him. True, you had yelled at him a few times for cheating (quite blatantly at that) while playing games but it had always ended in laughter and giggles, as though you couldn’t stay angry at him for long.
He gave you the urge to stare at him for hours, studying and etching his features into your brain forever, as though he was a piece you would have to sculpt later on. It amazed you that no matter how many times you looked at him, you always found him beautiful as though it was the first time you had laid your eyes on him.
Your thoughts were interrupted by the shop assistant, asking what the two of you would like.
“Can we get clothes which complement each other? Like even subtly is fine for us.” Jeonghan asked.
Hell, he even had an amazing voice. He was so well mannered that you were sure if you had met Jeonghan at one of your parent’s parties instead, you would have fallen heads over heels with him. 
“Not matching couple clothes?”
“No. Something which complements each other would be better. What do you think, Y/N?”
To be honest, you thought that was a genius idea. In that way, you could even wear the dress after your ‘breakup’, without making things awkward. Leave it to Yoon Jeonghan to sort out everything just perfectly. 
“Yeah, I think that is a brilliant idea too. Oh, we also need to pick your suit and my dress for the party.” You reminded him.
“Do you want to choose for each other?”
“What?” The question had completely caught you off guard. Wasn’t picking dresses for each other something couples did? You both really didn’t need to act as a couple too much here, so why was he suggesting it?
“We don’t have to do it, if you are feeling awkward about it.” He said gently. If Yoon Jeonghan treated you sweetly one more time, you were sure you would start smiling at him like a fool constantly. Then his eyes lit up mischievously and he leaned in, as though about to tell you his biggest secret. “But I do have a great fashion choice.”
You let out a laugh at this, amused that that was what he had wanted to say. Smiling at him you shook your head, indicating that he could choose for you.
“What’s your favourite colour?” He asked, looking at dresses hanging on the hangers being rolled in front of the two of you. 
“I like pink. Or any light shade, actually.” 
“Then how’s this one?” He pointed at one of the pink gowns that had caught your eyes previously, and you nodded eagerly at him.
“I’ll try that out!” You said as you walked into the changing room, glad that both of your tastes had aligned well. Once you were done you stepped out, clearing your throat to get Jeonghan’s attention, who was busy on his phone. He looked up and froze for a second, before his eyes darted all over your figure, checking you out with his mouth slightly open.
You felt your cheeks flush at the way he was looking at you, the way he swallowed and then smiled at you gently. Your stomach fluttered at his action, unable to stop yourself from mirroring his smile. Jeonghan got up and walked over to you, grinning at you as he cocked his head towards the side slightly.
And for some reason, that action made you feel even more giddy.
“How do I look?” You asked, sounding breathless for some reason. Embarrassed, you tried to cover it up by pretending to be excited, and twirling in front of the mirror once to see for yourself.
“You look amazing. Like really, really beautiful.”
He sounded really genuine and you beamed at him, equally happy that both of you chose a dress that suited you very well. You had been called beautiful many times, mostly by men trying to flatter you or your father, but something about the way Jeonghan said it made you shy.
“Should we choose one for you?” You asked once you came back from the changing room, eyeing all the tuxedos that had been brought in now. Jeonghan nodded and you walked over to the rack, searching for one that would bring out his delicate features more beautifully.
“How about this one?” You asked, pointing at a white coloured one. It looked like a conductor’s tuxedo and you felt that it would really go well with his long hair. He nodded and went inside the changing room, while you sat down on the couch, waiting for him to return.
“Y/N?” Someone softly called you, and you looked up to see Jeonghan smiling at you, all dressed up in the outfit you had picked for him. He was just smiling, an expression he gave you quite often and honestly it shouldn’t have had much effect on you, it really shouldn’t. You should have just smiled back, complimented him, paid for your stuff and gone out to eat a round of ice cream that you had promised him.
But instead, it had a great effect on you.
Just Yoon Jeonghan standing there and smiling at you had a huge effect on you. It made time slow down as you felt your heart hammer loudly in your chest, squeezing painfully every now and then. If you hadn't been sitting down your knees might have given away, breath gone for a second as you admired for the millionth time how beautiful he was. 
Because he really was. He looked so handsome, so pretty and so- every adjective that you could think of but couldn’t really because of how goddamned ethereal he looked right now. It was like the suit was tailor made for just him. He looked like a prince straight out from your dreams and it took you all your willpower to stop fluttering in your heart.
Realising you were staring at him for too long, you looked away immediately, releasing a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. Your cheeks burned in shame at the effect he had on you, despite it being just the second time you had hung out with him after deciding to fake your relationship. 
You had known him for quite some time, it wasn’t like the two of you had become friends just yesterday. 
And yet, you felt like you were ‘rediscovering’ Jeonghan. Like his smile for example. Even though you knew he was pretty, nothing prepared you ever for the sudden flutters in your heart everytime he smiled at you. Or the way he smelled a bit too good, when he had come to pick you up earlier, like he had just stepped out of the shower.
“Y/N?” Jeonghan called you, jostling back to the present. His usual angelic smile was now replaced by a smirk, and you groaned internally and cursed yourself for digging up your own grave. Why did you have to stare at him like that? “Do I look so good that I left you speechless?”
“Shut up, Yoon. You look fine.” You emphasised on the ‘fine’, rolling your eyes so that he got your message but that just caused him to grin at you more.
Nope. Nope. There was no way you were developing feelings for Yoon Jeonghan. Definitely not after you knew how sinister he was and definitely not after you asked him to be your fake boyfriend. You didn’t want to inflate his ego by making him think that he could make you fall for him by just literally breathing, all the while he played the act of being your fake date.
Slowly you got up from your seat and walked past him casually, letting the shop owner know that you were ready to pay. 
You were determined to not let Jeonghan’s presence shake you. It’s just for a week, Y/N. After that the two of you can just go back to being friends and this stupid crush you might be developing will go away.
What you didn’t though, was that you were bad at predicting the future. Vey, very bad.
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“Hey, I think both Joshua and Jeonghan have a thing for you. Ever considered being in a poly relationship?” Seungkwan whispered into your ears not-so-subtly.
You glared at him for this scandalous comment before quickly glancing at Jeonghan and Joshua sitting opposite to the two of you. Luckily, they both were busy with their midterm project and were discussing something while comparing notes on their laptops.
The promised ice cream ‘date’ of three days ago had to be cancelled because it had begun raining all of a sudden and neither of you wanted to get wetter than what you were when you ran into the bus stand. So you had promised to take him to the little cafe inside your campus instead, and Joshua and Seungkwan decided to tag along to act as ‘chaperones’, though you weren’t sure what they were chaperoning because both you and Jeonghan had lots of assignments left and had been planning to do your own work.
“Shut up, Boo!” You hissed, never wanting to murder your best friend more than right now. “What if they heard you?”
“What about it? Both of them know that everyone wants to have a threesome with them.”
“Have a threesome with whom?”
You turned to Joshua in horror, feeling embarrassment creep into your cheeks as he eagerly looked between the two of you. Jeonghan on the other hand looked surprised, as though not even sure what the conversation was about.
“Have a threesome with whom? Us?” Joshua asked again, his smile a bit too excited for his own good. You thought he would be uncomfortable with it but instead he looked excited about this conversation, causing you to groan as you buried your face in your hand.
“Stop acting like you don’t know! Don’t rub it on me that the two of you are more handsome than me!” Seungkwan sulked, giving his signature side eye to Joshua. But that just caused Joshua to smile more brightly at him, as though Seungkwan’s misery was his pleasure (which it probably was).
“I’m not rubbing it on you! I might be handsome but there’s no one cuter than you, Seungkwan. Right, Y/N?” You faked a look of disgust and pretended to puke over your drink. Though you wouldn’t admit it out loud, but you were even willing a fight a lion if it disagreed that your best friend was adorable and handsome (you dearly hoped it wouldn’t come down to that situation. The last time all of you went to the zoo, Minghao and Jihoon nearly pushed Soonyoung into the tiger’s den for claiming to be one so you learnt that whatever you told, your friends would try their level best to make it come true).
“Are you two flirting? Is this a double date?” Jeonghan asked, head turning between Joshua and Seungkwan as though he was watching a tennis match. 
“No way, I’m only going to date the person who calls me Shua, no one else.” 
Your eyes widened at his statement and you gulped in a huge amount of your drink, causing you to choke and violently cough. While Seungkwan and Joshua just laughed at you (you were literally dying and of course that would be the immediate response of the people you called friends), Jeonghan looked worriedly at you and reached out to gently pat your hand. You felt your breathing slowly ease down due to his action, and he grabbed your hand in his to gently rub circles with his thumb.
It was a rather small act from a friend who just cared about you. Nothing romantic or intimate at all, and yet you felt a warm fuzzy feeling grow at your heart. He smiled at you gently when you had completely stopped coughing, pouring a cup of water and handing it to you.
You were grateful for the drink and you took in a sip cautiously, your mind still wandering to the now disappearing feeling in your chest. 
Your thoughts were interrupted by the waitress who came to your table, and you recognised her as someone you might have seen talking to your Applied Physics - I professor. She gave you, Seungkwan and Joshua a half-assed smile, but when her eyes landed on Jeonghan, she smiled at him in the most glamorous way ever.
“So what can I get you guys now?” She asked. Miyeon, as her name tag stated, was clearly talking to the entire table yet her eyes were trained only on Jeonghan. You saw him return her smile politely, and you felt your insides churn a little.
Because it was the same smile he always gave you. The same goddamn smile that had you feeling that you were on cloud nine, that made you shy and that same smile that made you feel special.
So he wasn’t doing it just for you? 
You never thought you would ever be jealous over something this trivial. You didn’t even like him in that way and yet, you could almost feel the disappointment clutching at your heart almost a bit too tightly.
It then hit you that the only expression Jeonghan had given you so far was either his look of surprise or a smile, but nothing more than that. Whenever he was hanging out with the entire gang or even now when it was just Joshua, you and Seungkwan, he had been laughing and cracking lots of jokes. But when he was with you all alone, all he did was smile and give you compliments, as though the two of you had just met due to a blind date set up by your parents. 
Did you make Jeonghan that uncomfortable? Was he too nice to say no to your idea back then?
But the Jeonghan you knew wasn’t a pushover, so he must have thought about it a bit before agreeing, right? You are just overthinking everything. You chided yourself. 
Your further thoughts were all stopped when you noticed everyone at the table staring at you. 
“Your order?” Miyeon asked, annoyance evident in her voice.
“Er, I would like to have your Special Strawberry Jam Sandwich. And another cup of coffee please.”
“Got it.” Then turning back towards Jeonghan, she said, “So that’s your order too? Not your regular?”
Jeonghan nodded as the word regular whirled in your brain. He visited this cafe often? Had he- had he lied to you then?
The rest of the meal passed by in a blur, with the three boys doing the most of the talking. You joined in once or twice but mostly stayed to yourself, contemplating hard on what to do next.
It wasn’t that you were crushing on Jeonghan and that was making you sad. It was more like you didn’t want him to feel extremely uncomfortable around you, seeing how he had clearly lied to you about the cafe and treated you just the way he treated any other person on the street.
Soon it was time to leave and the four of you walked out of the cafe. But before you could part ways with the boys, Jeonghan grabbed your arm and stopped you.
“I want to talk to you.” He said and you nodded, realising that it would be better if even you got all your questions cleared up. Through the corner of your eyes you saw Seungkwan take out his phone and hastily type down something, and felt your phone vibrate almost immediately after he hit the send button.
Taking out your phone you checked his message, feeling a smile tug at the corner of your lips. 
[uriboo]: if yoon jeonghan tries anything funny, just send sos. no matter where i am, i’ll kick his ass using my special kick reserved for soonyoung only.
You gave him a thumbs up and waved him goodbye, watching Joshua and Seungkwan’s retreating figures disappear round the corner. It was almost evening by now and the sky had turned a light shade of orangish pink. You stared it for some time until you felt Jeonghan tug you once more.
“Come on. Let’s talk there.” He asked, pointing at one of the benches farther away from the walking path. “No one will hear us there.” You nodded and followed him, sitting down beside him. A few moments passed as the two of you just watched students walk by, neither of you taking the lead to start the conversation.
“Are you okay?” Jeonghan asked after some time, and you turned to look at him dryly.
“I’m…fine. Okay, I guess. Just a bit tired.”
“No…what’s wrong? Did someone say something? Did I hurt you?”
There he went again.
You turned to glare at him but the look of concern on his face was enough to stop you. He looked really worried for you, and even reached out to grab your hand and give it a squeeze. You gulped to stop the way your heart fluttered at his actions, reminding yourself of what you had to ask him.
“Why…why did you lie to me?” You asked, swallowing thickly once more so that you didn’t sound hurt. But your voice still sounded strangled, and if Jeonghan had noticed it, he didn’t show it.
“Are you talking about the cafe?” He asked gently, and you nodded slowly.
“When I said I would take you out to a new place and mentioned its name too, you didn’t tell me you already went there. The waitress mentioned that you were a regular there!” It almost sounded like you were whining by this point.
Jeonghan blinked at you once, twice and then burst out laughing. “Is that what is bothering you?”
Pulling your hand away from his, you swatted his arm lightly, feeling hurt at his reaction. “It’s not funny! I literally gushed to you about the strawberry sandwich, saying that if you tried it you would forget every other sandwich when you had probably tried it a million times before. Do you know how embarrassing it is? It's so embarrassing that I bragged about something you already knew, it makes me look like a show off.”
“Ah, but I had never actually tried the strawberry sandwich before.” He said, taking your hand in his again. “I really had never tried it before, which is why I didn’t say anything. Besides, you looked so cute when you were talking about the cafe and I really didn’t want you to stop.”
You froze a little, taken aback by his last statement. Quickly, you tried to change the subject, hoping he wouldn’t notice the sudden heat forming on your cheeks.
“I-I- Okay. I-I have a few more questions to ask, if you don’t mind. Or…you can go first about whatever you wanted to talk about.”
“Go ahead. I finished asking mine. I just wanted to know what’s wrong with you.” 
“Oh.” So it was the typical Jeonghan-cares-for-you question. “Er, are you and the waitress close? Um, what’s her name? Miyeon?”
“Not that close.” He replied nonchalantly. “She had helped me with some physics homework once, that’s all. And oh, also because I visit the cafe regularly.”
“I think she likes you.”
“Yeah me too.” He smirked when you stared at him. “Jealous?”
“Jealous of whom? You?” You countered back, keeping your expression as neutral as you could. You weren’t, couldn’t be jealous and you weren’t going to show him that you were either. He laughed at your comeback and you felt yourself smile, feeling pleased that he had enjoyed your retort. 
“Point. Miyeon is pretty. But just so you know, she had asked me today whether I could hang out with her sometime later.”
“When did this happen? What did you say?” Even though you knew Jeonghan probably said yes, you still wanted to hear the answer from him.
“I said you were my girlfriend, what else? It happened when you had gone to the bathroom and she got the bill to the table. She then even asked why were you sitting beside Seungkwan if you were my girlfriend.”
“And what did you guys say then?”
“Seungkwan said ‘bros before hoes’.”
You rolled your eyes, questioning yourself why you even thought your best friend might have given a smart answer. “Of course he did. Can I ask you one more question?”
“You are asking an awful lot of questions, aren’t you?” He smiled at you, his eyes glinting in a teasing manner.
“It’s the last one! Please, Hannie?”
It was the first time you were using the nickname and you could swear you saw him tense for a fraction of a second. Then it was gone as soon as it had come. Instead, he gave your hand a gentle squeeze, indicating you to go. You had almost forgotten that the two of you were still holding hands, and this squeeze seemed to suddenly liven the atmosphere around the two of you, as though reminding you of his presence.
“Do you…find it uncomfortable to be with me?”
His smile faltered, clearly caught off guard by your question.
“I mean, do I make you feel uncomfortable? Like…did you say yes to being my boyfriend just because you didn’t want to refuse me and make me feel bad or-”
“Why would I do that? Shit, do I act like that around you? You aren’t someone new Y/N. You have been my friend for quite some time. Why would I feel uncomfortable around you? And I didn’t say yes because I felt bad for you. We both needed escorts and that’s why I said yes.”
“Then why do you act so differently when you are around me?” You asked, releasing your hand from his grasp. “Like, like you always look like you are enjoying yourself when we are with our friends but whenever it's just the two of us, you act just so sweet and nice. That’s about it. Just- just sweet and nice. Like how you are to Miyeon.”
He didn’t say anything for a while, as though thinking before answering your question.
“It’s not that I don’t like you Y/N. And I definitely didn’t say yes because I thought you were pathetic or something. Really. It’s just that…I don’t know how this works either.”
“How does what work?” You asked, your voice much softer than you expected. Jeonghan leaned in to you a bit closer, and for the first time you saw him beyond the smiles and jokes he made. He looked tired, really tired as though this act was wearing him out too.
“I-I’m not sure what kind of boyfriend you want. I’m not sure whether I should treat you like a friend and crack jokes about the most useless thing or treat you like a princess like your boyfriend probably would. I don’t know how much to step out of the line of being friends. I don’t know what is the line that oversteps from fake boyfriend to real boyfriend. I…just don’t know what to do most of the time.”
This time, you took his hand in yours, giving them a gentle squeeze. He looked up at you and you smiled softly at him, trying to ease down all the pressure he had been feeling for the past few days. 
You were such an idiot. How could you expect him to act normally when you had just dumped a huge burden over his shoulder?
“Jeonghan…it’s okay. You are doing great, you know that? And sometimes, when I look at you, I wish I could be more like you. You don’t need to treat me as your girlfriend, really. Like I said, I would never want to make you feel uncomfortable. Just treat me as a friend, okay? And if you ever want to stop, just tell me. I’ll always be there for you.”
He gulped and nodded slowly, not breaking eye contact even once. Your heart gave a painful squeeze when he still didn’t look away, all of a sudden feeling that your entire surrounding had melted away.
You could only feel his soft gaze on you, almost feeling raw and exposed and yet, even you couldn’t look away.
“I would never leave you.” Jeonghan whispered, almost mumbling as he finally tore away his gaze. 
“Why? Is this arrangement proving to be useful to you too?” You joked, trying to lighten the mood.
“Yeah it did help me escape from Miyeon.”
“So I’m your scapegoat now?” You asked scandalously, letting go of your hands so that you could grab him by the shoulder and glare properly. He grinned at you, back to his playful nature. You felt your heart swell by the way he giggled, the infectious laughter causing you to smile too despite trying to sound mad at him.
“Hey, aren’t friends supposed to protect each other like that?”
“Not- not- I- okay whatever!”
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“Er, do you see Seungkwan?” You asked Yeri, eyes scanning the crowd for your best friend. The loud noise from the booming speaker was making it almost impossible to hear your roommate, so you turned to her, only to find yourself standing alone in a crowd of drunk bodies. You groaned internally as Yeri was your designated driver today, and you prayed that wherever she went, she wouldn't end up drunk like she had last time.
Byun Baekhyun, a senior known for his loudness and great ambition to wreck chaos wherever he went had decided to throw a party for the first years as a celebration for completing the first term without losing their sanity (which was clearly a lie; you were close to losing your mind). 
“How am I supposed to find anyone- Hey! Yuna!” Grabbing the hands of the said girl, you felt familiarity rush in when she turned to you and gave you a smile.
“Hey, Y/N. You look great. Dressed up for someone special?”
“As if. Have you seen Seungkwan anywhere? I just can’t find him.”
At this she snickered. “Seungkwan? Are you sure you are searching for him?”
You frowned at her. When she saw that you didn’t understand what she was indicating, she smiled at you and beckoned you to come closer. “Are you sure,” she whispered in your ear, the slight smell of alcohol wafting to your nose, “you aren’t looking for Jeonghan?”
You drew back from her sharply, all of a sudden feeling hot. How does she know? Does word travel that fast? Of course it does. When Yuna saw that you didn’t say anything, she let out a laugh and patted your shoulder before pointing at the corner.
Giving her a tight lipped smile, you followed the direction of her finger though you weren’t really sure whether she had pointed to Seungkwan or Jeonghan.
“Thank god!” You exhaled, when you saw Seungkwan and Chan sitting on a couch in the corner of the room, and you quickly slipped in between them. 
“Thank God for what?” Seungkwan asked.
“Nothing. Yuna’s drunk. Where are the others?” You asked, taking a sip of the solo cup Seungkwan had just handed you. You found it odd that it was just Seungkwan, Chan and you here because usually your entire gang of friends used to stick together to have fun at parties.
“Ah, that.” Chan snickered. “Your boyfriend might or might not have caused a little bit of a problem.”
“What? What happened?” You asked, turning your head to look at Seungkwan and Chan alternatively. To say you weren’t concerned would be a lie. And it was definitely not because Jeonghan was your faux boyfriend.
“Er, so Jeonghan might or might not have got his toy sword and wooden hammer with him to the party-” Seungkwan began.
“He got what?”
“You know, his toy sword-”
“I knew about his toy sword but not his wooden hammer.”
“It's for self defence against bad guys at night, apparently.” Chan added, causing you to groan. 
“What happened then?”
“I think someone made some comment about you and he decided as your boyfriend, mind you the entire college knows now, he had to defend your honour. He even gave the opponent his wooden hammer because he wasn’t armed.” Seungkwan finished, calmingly taking a sip of his drink like it was completely natural for Jeonghan to fight for your honour.
You looked at Chan incredulously and he too had the same expression. “He’s joking right?”
“Jeonghan was drunk. Like really, really drunk when it started.”
“How did he get this drunk so quickly?”
“Sweetheart, the party started an hour ago. Not everyone remembers their incomplete inorganic homework five minutes before leaving.” Seungkwan stated, causing you to glare at him.
“So where are the others?”
“Well, the challenge was made just before you came and Jeonghan went upstairs to ‘duel’. Seungcheol, Mingyu, Minghao and  Seokmin followed him upstairs to stop him while the rest followed him to egg on him.”
Chan got up, followed by you and Seungkwan. “We were just waiting for you. I bet your lover boy is dying to see your face.”
“Shut up Chan.” Your face was practically burning by now. But this was what you had wanted, right? To make everyone think you both were a couple? “Please tell me we are going upstairs so that both of you can join the team that stops him and not eggs on him?”
Seungkwan gave you a dirty look. “How low do you think we are? Of course we are going to egg him on.”
“Fucking hate you all.”
Luckily, upstairs wasn’t that crowded but it still took the three of you some pushing around to reach the centre. The scene that met your eyes nearly turned you blood cold. The other guy, you recognised him as a senior from your major, had Jeonghan on his knees as he gripped his shirt collar. He was yelling profanities at Jeonghan, but he was too out to even listen to him. You saw that his lip had split open and his right eye looked bruised.
“Why aren't you stopping him?” You hissed to Seungcheol. You noticed that even though all your friends were there, none of them were cheering for the fight to continue. In fact, they all looked scared now
.
“We can’t. He’s a senior and he said- he said if we stop him then he’s going to hurt Jeonghan more!” Seungcheol himself looked terrified and you gritted your teeth angrily. It was true. If a senior ragged you, there was nothing you could do except accept your fate.
You heard the sound of flesh hitting flesh; loud, and both you and Seungcheol turned to see Jeonghan on the floor, the senior’s hand balled in a fist. At that moment, something snapped inside you and you found yourself walking towards him.
“Y/N, wait-” Seungkwan began worriedly but it was too late. Everything happened so fast but all you vaguely remembered was yanking the senior by hair and landing a slap on his cheeks. Since he was drunk that slap was enough to cause him to lose his balance, and you just shoved him into the ground.
Turning around, you picked up Jeonghan’s sword and hammer before turning to the groaning boy. Gently tugging one arm over your shoulder, you tried pulling him up. It was a bit hard, considering he was drunk and hurt and using you completely as support, but then his weight lightened on you and you turned to see Joshua slinging his other arm around his neck.
“Let me help you.” He muttered. The crowd parted away easily and before you knew it, the three of you were outside. It was a bit hard dragging Jeonghan all the way to the dorm and the only reason you managed to do it was because Joshua was bearing his maximum weight. 
Finally, you reached their room and pulled Jeonghan onto his bed. The two of you sat down beside him, trying to catch your breaths. Glancing at Jeonghan’s resting figure, you felt your heart clench painfully. 
Moonlight streamed into the room, lighting up his face in an almost angelic glow and yet the blows he had received were painfully visible.
“Thank you.” You heard Joshua mutter, and you looked up at him. He too was looking at Jeonghan sadly, as though he had been punched too. Then he looked at you and gave you a soft smile. “Thank you for stepping up.”
“It’s nothing.” You huffed. “I just did what I had to do for a friend. I’m not blaming you guys though!”
“Still. It was a really brave thing to do. But are you sure about that?”
“About what?”
Joshua leaned in until your faces were just a few inches apart. You tried backing away but the headboard hit you and you were left with no space to move. He smirked at you before speaking. 
“Are you sure about Jeonghan being, you know, just a friend?”
You stared at him with your mouth slightly open, slowly thinking of what he had said.
Jeonghan was a friend, right? You had come in terms with him a few days ago and had convinced yourself that he was a friend. You would step into a fight for any of your friends, right?
A groan from beside you interrupted your thoughts and both of you turned to see Jeonghan staring at you with half opened eyes. 
“Y/N.” He whispered your name with a small smile, wincing almost immediately when the cut on his lips stung. His eyes travelled along your body before it landed on Joshua. He frowned at the said man, as though trying to comprehend something.
“Joshua.”
“Nice to meet you too.”
He blinked several times before staring at something between the two of you. Then he tried getting up by propping up his elbows which gave away immediately, causing his head to land on your lap instead. You stiffened at the closeness but figured he was too drunk and hurt to even overthink this situation.
“Why are you two always so close? Everytime I’m gone, the two of you are almost always together.” He sounded almost hurt. You tried making sense of what he meant by that but Joshua just laughed.
Getting up, he said, “I’ll leave the two of you alone. If he tries something, call me. I’ll be in my bedroom. Oh also, try thinking about what I told you before.” Giving you a wink, he exited the room, closing the door behind him.
“What did he tell you?” Jeonghan asked, turning on your lap so that he was facing you now. His hair was sticking to his forehead due to the sweat, the jet black colour appearing almost dark blue under the moonlight. You hissed when you saw his wounds up close, gently brushing his hair away from his face.
He caught your wrist as his eyes fluttered open, staring at you before repeating his question. “What did Joshua tell?”
“Nothing, you idiot. Jeonghan, why the hell did you get into a fight? Do you know where you keep your medicines? I’ll get them-”
“No.” His grip on your hand tightened as he brought it over his chest, clasping it with his both hands now. “He made fun of you.”
Maybe it was the way he said it with so much hurt in his voice or maybe it was the way he looked like a prince underneath the moonlight, but you felt your breath catch your throat. Your heart gave a painful squeeze and then stuttered, as you watched his gentle features stare back at you softly.
It felt like time had stopped as you stared at Yoon Jeonghan lying on your lap, realising how beautiful he was. And no, it wasn’t like the other times you had realised it. This time, it felt painful, as though he had sucked out all your breath and had caused your heart to swell with this overwhelming emotion. 
It made you feel good, and you felt yourself craving for that feeling more.
“That doesn’t mean you’ll get into a fight with everyone. Look how hurt you are, Hannie.” You whispered softly. To be honest you weren’t sure why you were whispering, but as you gently stroked his hair with your free hand, it felt right talking to him softly.
He let out a harsh breath as he slowly raised on hand towards your face, causing you to freeze. You felt his fingers ghost your lips, and you almost leaned in to feel his touch. You felt your stomach lurch when your eyes met his, that feeling in your heart growing stronger as he refused to touch you yet.
“Love it when you call me that.” His voice had dropped an octave, and you nearly let out a squeak at his sudden sultry voice. Finally, you felt his long slender fingers grasp at your chin and his thumb brushed against your lips, giving you the contact your body was almost burning for. Your eyes fluttered close as he gently ran his thumb over your lips. “Love it so much I would give up ‘most everything to get you to call me that.”
You are drunk. He’s even more drunk. What do you think you are doing?
Your eyes snapped open at that realisation and you jerked away from his touch, his hand just falling limply to his side.
“We are drunk, Han- Jeonghan. We shouldn’t- I shouldn’t be doing this to you.” You told him as softly as you could, gently sliding his head off your lap onto the pillow. He had fallen asleep and now the only sound in the room that could be heard was his breathing; and the abnormally loud hammering of your heart. 
Slowly, you covered him with his blanket and kept his toy sword and hammer beside him before you snuck out of his room. Then closing the door behind you, you rested your back against it, taking a moment to catch your breath and calm down your racing heart.
If you weren’t sure about it before, you definitely were now. It was glaringly obvious to you, no matter how much you tried to push your feelings away.
You were in love with Yoon Jeonghan. 
It’s fine. You thought to yourself. I just need to pretend I don’t have feelings for him until tomorrow. Once we go about our own ways, I can bawl my eyes out to Seungkwan.
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“Miss?” The maid asked cautiously, and you looked at her annoyed, silently asking her to go on. “Your escort, Mr. Yoon, is here.” 
Wordlessly you got up, glancing at the mirror one last time to check your gloves and hair. Annoyance creeped into your features when you realised it didn’t even matter actually. Then you walked out of your house, making sure you shut the door behind you with a bang.
Walking out into the garden of your parent’s manor, you saw Jeonghan waiting for you, leaning against the limousine. His face broke into a grin when he saw you approaching, but it faltered when he realised you weren’t exactly smiling back at him.
“Hey.” He said, as he opened the door for you to enter.
“Hi.” You said curtly, bunching up your gown in the most careless manner and getting in the car, shutting the door before he could. He wordlessly got in through the other side, indicating the chauffeur to start.
A few minutes of silence passed before he spoke.
“Is…something wrong?”
You turned to glare at him, expecting him to look annoyed at your annoying attitude. Or even confused. But instead, he looked concerned.
Immediately you felt bad at being angry at him for something he didn’t even do. 
No. It wasn’t that you felt bad, it was more like his worried look had thrown you off your anger, feeling tears sting your eyes instead now.
“You can tell me about it. Or you don’t have to. But I’m all ears, anytime you need me.” Gently, he took your hands in his and gave it a squeeze, smiling at you softly. 
“I- Just- You look good today.” You choked out, trying to change the subject without looking too pathetic in front of him. How down bad were you for him that one worried glance caused you to break the dam of emotion that had been building up since morning.
But it was true. He did look good. The suit made him look more ethereal, and it did nothing to stop your heart from accelerating at that speed. 
His lips pulled into a smile, You noticed that his lips had almost healed, and the cut couldn’t really be seen unless you stared at it (which you definitely weren’t; because why would you stare at him?) 
“What can I say? I’m so pretty that I look good at everything.”
“Or I have a great choice of clothing.”
Jeonghan laughed and counter argued, but you were too busy staring at the way he laughed to listen to his banter. The way he displayed his teeth every time he smiled and the way his eyes crinkled at the corner when he laughed seemed to be pulling at your heartstrings. And the fact that he was gently rubbing circles on your hand with his thumb, sending electricity through your arm.
“I could help lighten whatever’s causing a frown on that pretty face of yours.”
His flirty comment brought you back to the present, quickly turning your head away to stare at the buildings speeding past the two of you instead. You felt the bitterness come back but it was much less than before as Jeonghan had helped you feel much light hearted.
“You’ll see once you reach there.” You muttered, and through the corner of your eyes you saw Jeonghan nod. The car came to a halt in front of a mansion, indicating that you had arrived at your destination.
“Y/N this is your last chance.” Jeonghan said. You blinked at him in confusion. “This is your last chance to change your partner to Joshua.”
Suppressing the laughter threatening to escape from you, you pretended to think. “Well…so far it’s still a no. But if I see Shua looks more handsome than you…then well, I can’t guarantee you I’ll be sleeping with you tonight.”
There was a rule of elite parties that required couples to sleep in for the night, which was why you had wanted to choose a familiar face in the first place.
Jeonghan pouted at you and you laughed, but immediately caught yourself when you felt your heart flutter. You couldn’t let this feeling grow. The two of you were just actors in a play and actors could never fall in love with each other.
Two of you walked over to your assigned room and only then did you let out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. You had met just a few people on your way here and the two of you had responded to all of them with small smiles, and you were greatly aware of Jeonghan’s arm around your waist.
“What do you want to do now?” Jeonghan, already lying down on the double bed. You narrowed your eyes as he kicked off his shoes and wrapped the blanket around himself. “What?” He asked when he saw you. “I’m tired, okay? Just wake me up half an hour before the party starts so that I can look a bit more presentable.”
“Okay? I, uh, I’m just going to look around, okay?” Saying that, you switched off the light for him and slipped out, wondering where you should go next. You vaguely remembered a fountain in one of the gardens from the one time you had come here with your parents and decided to search for it.
It took you some time but eventually (after a lot of checking through balconies whether it was the correct side of the garden) you managed to find it. But as you reached there, you saw someone already seated on its edges. You couldn't make out who it was, so you decided to leave. You stopped on your tracks and took a step back, only to step on a twig.
The twig snapped with a loud thwack! which was heard loud and clear in the silent garden. The boy sitting turned to look at you, his expression changing from shock to happiness as he recognised you.
“Y/N.” Joshua greeted you, patting at the stone beside him. “Come and join me.”
Knowing you were trapped, you had no other option but to go and sit down beside him. Not that you didn’t like his companion but you really didn’t want to lash out your anger at another innocent soul.
“Hi.”
“You look pretty.” Joshua commented, to which you just smiled. The words that he had told you yesterday seemed to ring in your head now. Did he mean this? About your feelings towards Jeonghan?
“Joshua?” You asked, clearing your throat. “Yesterday…what did you mean by that?”
“It’s no fun if I tell you. Did you think about it?” The familiar mischievous glint was back in his eyes. 
“I did…a little.”
“Then you know what I’m talking about-”
“I don’t like him.” You cut him off and then upon seeing his amused look, you added, “Not in that way. He’s just a friend who agreed to help me. I don’t have feelings for him at all.” 
“Well…everyone can tell you both are perfect for each other. No one even doubts for a second that the two of you aren’t.”
You just sighed, fluttering your eyes close as you let the night breeze calm you down a little. It’s okay. You thought to yourself. Everything will be okay once he isn’t pretending to be your boyfriend anymore. Once he is gone, these feelings would go too.
Yes. That was it. Maybe you were too immersed in your role of pretending and had let your emotions take control of you. Maybe you had thought that pretending to have feelings for him would make this much easier on both of you.
A small part of you kept screaming that lying to yourself won’t change this situation, but that didn’t stop you from saying your next line as you opened your eyes to look at the man sitting next to you with a smile.
“There’s nothing between the two of us. We are just…tryna do what lovers do.” 
You remembered how Jeonghan had used you as a scapegoat to turn down Miyeon. Yes, that was the main purpose, wasn’t it? This whole relationship was built on a lie, just meant to be used and thrown for such situations.
“Joshua? Y/N?”
You froze at the familiar voice and judging from Joshua's expression, even he wasn’t expecting it. You turned back to see Jeonghan looking at the two of you. He was smiling but there was something off about it. 
Joshua got up and walked up to him, before leaning in to whisper something in Jeonghan’s ear. Then waving you a goodbye, he walked off, leaving you and Jeonghan all alone. Jeonghan came and sat down beside you, though he maintained a little distance.
“Did you- did you overhear our conversation?” You asked, confused at this sudden change in behaviour.
He shrugged nonchalantly. “What’s there to overhear? I already know that. I already know that we are doing this for show.” He spoke curtly and you frowned.
Did you hurt him by any chance? But what you said was the truth, right?
“Are you okay? Did I say something?”
He let out a hollow laugh, before forcing a smile at you. “No, it’s not you. It’s all my fault really. It’s all my fault that this is happening and I’m sorry about it.”
“Jeonghan, you are acting weird.”
“Says the one who wouldn’t explain why she’s been mad the entire evening.”
“It’s my parents, okay?” You snapped, getting up and standing in front of him. He seemed taken aback by this sudden outburst but at this point, you really didn’t care. “They aren’t even coming today! All this drama I went through, all this stupid worry I had in my head at the end of the day meant nothing! I only agreed to come to this party because my parents would have been there but of course they decided to go to Switzerland today itself without telling me! 
I wouldn’t have even bothered asking you to be my escort if it weren’t for them. We would have been leading our own lives quietly but now I'm in this mess with you because of this stupid party! It’s so hard to play pretend that sometimes I just wish you would disappear!”
The last line slipped out of your mouth before you had even realised and you only stopped yourself when you saw Jeonghan’s expression.
You had stepped out of the line.
“I- I- Okay, I didn’t mean you to disappear! I mean, not because of that.”
Jeonghan wordlessly got up, his face all of a sudden so cold that you almost could hear your heart break. How could you do this? How could you do this to him? His eyes which usually used to hold a million emotions that you would associate with happiness were now empty as they stared back at you with contempt.
He opened his mouth to speak but closed it almost immediately, as though figuring out it was better to keep quiet than argue with you.
“I see. Well, I’m sorry I made you feel uncomfortable Y/N. I’ll leave for now but don’t worry, I’ll still pretend to be your escort for today. And then you don’t need to hang out with me that much in college. A week later, or wherever you feel like you don’t need me at all, we’ll just break up. Okay? I’m sorry for everything. Like I said, it’s all my fault.”
With that he walked away from you, your attempt to grab his sleeves fruitless.
“Jeonghan, wait! I didn’t mean it like that!” You yelled after him, but he didn’t look back at you even once. “I’m sorry, Jeonghan! I really am!”
You felt tears sliding down your cheeks as the frustration that had been building up finally broke through you. 
“Yoon Jeonghan! Do you even remember what happened yesterday?”
At this he stopped and turned back to you. His mouth fell open at your teary face but he didn’t take a single step to approach you.
“I’m asking you! Do you even remember what happened yesterday?”
He looked unsure how to answer that. After a while, he took a gulp and replied a soft ‘no’.
You closed your eyes, feeling the tears continue to flow. 
It hurt. It hurt so much that you wished your heart would stop beating. Maybe then, you would stop loving Jeonghan. Maybe then you would be able to move on from this relationship easily.
“What happened? Did I do-”
“Just leave, Hannie. Just leave.”
You saw him wince when you called him that but by now you were too tired to care, opting to sink onto the ground instead of dealing with what was in front of you. 
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It had been a week. Exactly a week without texts, a week without meeting up with Jeonghan unless it was your entire friend group, a week without holding hands and a week until you finally called him.
You had thought that maybe doing all of this would completely remove him from your head, that it would be much easier to move on by pretending that your feelings were because of being so close to him.
But if anything, your love for Yoon Jeonghan had seemed to grow. He was the only thing in your mind constantly as you thought about his antics and jokes. You missed his smile and the way he would hold your hands gently. You missed everything about Jeonghan but there was nothing you could do about it, especially not after how the two of you had very obviously fucked up your friendship (neither of you had even attended the party after that; the two of you just claimed that you were tired and left).
Not that anyone even noticed. Everyone still thought you two were a couple, and it took all of your willpower not to burst into tears whenever someone mentioned Jeonghan in front of you. Of course, Seungkwan knew. And you were sure Joshua knew too. But apart from that, no one had even questioned why the air seemed so stale whenever the two of you were together.
Which brought you to your present call.
“Hello?” A groggy voice on the other side of the line had you nearly jumping off your bed, as you grabbed the phone delicately near your ear, as though you might have been hearing things.
“Uh, hi. It’s me, Y/N.” Your heart still raced at the sound of his voice and you hoped you didn’t sound as squeaky as a twelve year old talking to their crush for the first time.
A pause.
Then he chuckled. “I know, I can see your caller ID.” 
Jeonghan had acted nonchalantly with you in front of everyone, like you hadn't just hurt his feelings by asking him to disappear. But you had thought that maybe he would be different when the two of you were alone, cold and distant since you had practically thrown his kindness onto his face.
“Hahah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, I forgot.” You muttered, embarrassed at the way you were acting. Your cheeks were feeling hot and you were glad that he couldn’t see you know.
“So what do you want?”
The words were like a slap to you, but you knew very well that you deserved that. That’s what your relationship had boiled down to. Just to fulfil each other’s needs.
“Um, my parents know about us.” You muttered.
“What?” He asked, as though he hadn’t heard you clearly the first time. You could hear the slight rise in his voice.
“My parents…they know about us and…you know how dating is in our world. They think I’m seeing you as a potential life partner for later on.”
“Do you want me to come over?” He asked softly, and something inside you broke.
“I- I- don't know what to do Hannie.” you felt tears stream down your cheeks. “I don't want you to think that I’m using you, not after what I told you. I shouldn’t even be asking you to cover for me anymore. I hate myself for that so much. But I really don’t know what to tell my parents-”
“Hey.” He hushed you. “I’ll be there, okay? When do you want me to come over?”
“Can you- can you come over for lunch?”
“I’ll be there for sometime before lunch then. Just wait a little, okay?” 
True to his word, Jeonghan showed up to your house half an hour before lunch time. The minute your maids had informed you that he was here, you had rushed downstairs to pull him into your bedroom without your parents noticing.
Locking the door behind you, you leaned your back against it to catch your breath. Your eyes flicked up to meet his worried ones, and you felt the familiar warmth rush back to your chest. 
“Jeonghan I-” You began but stopped when he held your hand that was clutching his sleeves. You thought he was trying to remove it but instead clasped it in his both hands. The huge apology that you had prepared in your head vanished, and all you could was stare at him with tears pricking your eyes once more.
“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” You whispered, your voice almost broken. Finding yourself alone with him for the first time after the incident seemed to have done something to you. All you could think of was getting him back. “I’m so sorry for all the things I told you.”
He stared at you for a few seconds, before dropping his eyes to your entwined hands. “It’s fine. It’s my fault you felt like that-”
“I wanted you to disappear because everytime I’m with you, I feel like I’m failing to just pretend you are my boyfriend.” You cut him off, taking a step closer to him. Your toes were now brushing each other’s and he looked up at you confused, as though he could not believe what he had just heard.
Taking a deep breath, you continued. “I know- I know that you might hate me after this because I’m- because I’m just misusing your goodness. But I’m in love with you Hannie. I like you so much that it drove me crazy trying to keep things the way it was between us. I had hoped maybe that after our fight I would forget you but instead I kept wanting you more. And I hated the fact that I hurt you. I hated-”
“Shh.” He whispered, taking both of your hands in his. He jerked you closer to him, until your noses were just a few inches apart. You were so close to him that you could smell the cologne lingering on him and see the black flecks in his soft brown eyes. His warm gaze was turning your knees to putty and you grasped his hand more tightly to steady yourself. “Don’t- Don’t ever say that, okay? Because I love you so much I can’t bear to see you crumbling like this, hating yourself for something that wasn’t even your fault. I love you so much that it’s okay if you don’t want me if I’m hurting you or making you uncomfortable.”
Taking a deep breath in harshly, you blinked at him as you tried to clear your brain.
Jeonghan…loved you too. He loved you.
When you didn’t say anything, Jeonghan covered the little distance between the two of you by pressing his lips against yours. You felt yourself melt into his touch, hands now clutching his biceps to steady yourself.
He pushed you against the door to press against your body better, his hands squeezing your hips gently. Jeonghan’s lips were soft against yours, kissing you feverishly as though you might disappear if he stopped to even catch his breath. 
You felt all rational thoughts leave your body when your teeth accidentally grazed against his lower lip, causing him to groan in your mouth. One hand cupped your cheek, tilting your face to get better access to your lips. 
His frantic kisses moved towards your ears, starting from the corner of your lip, to your cheek and finally to the soft skin right below your ear.
“Hannie.” You whispered softly, gripping his hair tightly as he sucked on the soft skin, kissing, biting and licking the same spot. You realised that the only thing supporting your jelly legs was the door and his grip on your waist, but you couldn’t even tell him to stop because of the euphoric feeling in your heart.
God, you loved him so, so much.
You tugged at his hair gently, causing him to stop doing what he was doing to look at you, and you threw your arms around his neck to pull him into a hug. He didn’t even falter for a second and immediately wrapped his arm around you, engulfing you in his warmth.
“I love it when you call me Hannie.” He whispered, kissing your ear softly. You felt yourself smile, giving him a squeeze as you felt your heart might explode out of happiness. 
“And I love you.”
Pulling away from him, you mirrored his smile, his soft gaze making you feel giddy like always. “But Hannie..” You began, and he cut you off with a quick kiss on your lips. 
“Hmmm?”
“I had really wanted to dance with you that day.”
“Is that so?” He hummed, his eyes shining with the familiar devilish glint. “Then should we dance after I tell your parents you are officially my girlfriend?”
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A/N: Please do tell me what you think about this story!! I worked really hard on it and I would love to know everyone’s thoughts on it~ Comments and reblogs are appreciated!    
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© 𝐆𝐘𝐔-𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑  
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unfortunate17 · 1 month
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Hate how some ppl are saying it shouldn’t have been a big deal for Simon to delete his accounts and lay low for Wille. Yeah sure that’s probably what’s expected for the crown prince’s partner, but wasn’t s3’s whole point ‘why should he have to? Why should Wilhelm have to?’ You want a queer king to revolutionise the monarchy but want that monarchy to operate exactly as it always has?
It’s not even that he hated all the attention! He loved being appreciated for his music, he was so happy that boy in bjarstad looked up to him, he thought that if Wille had to start a foundation, he could do some good for a cause he believed in. Yeah they’ll probably always still be in the public eye, but I think with time and support Simon could make peace with that, if he got to handle it in a way that fits his values and lets both him and Wille thrive (this is how pop star Simon can still win). IMO the issue was the royal court and Wille’s own issues leaving him out in the cold, with no idea how to deal with the hate except to “ignore it”
No you’re so right 👏
Honestly I’ve always felt that Simon and Wilhelm both have very “small” dreams. I actually kind of disagree with the pop star Simon agenda (but I also don’t fully disagree with it I think it can work depending on the context), but yeah he loved the positive attention 😭
I see a lot of people who keep saying that abdication wouldn’t solve all of Wilmon’s problems but they’re kind of missing the point?
Like yes Wilmon will always have to live with scrutiny and probably security, but they’ll be free to live how they choose. Wille can cut his hair how he likes, he can get tattoos, paint his nails, move out of the country, choose not to have children, get married however he likes - or not get married, dress how he likes, develop his own interests without wondering how the public is going to perceive him, etc. Simon can post on social media however he likes - they’ll have no reason to hide behind outdated ideas of respectability or tradition.
They’ll be free in all the ways that matter.
I also want to point out that the last thing Wilhelm says to his parents is that he loves them and the queen lets him go. It’s very much implied that Wille’s going to repair his relationship with his parents and it’s probably going to be a lot healthier now that he can be himself
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