TOO HOT TO HANDLE.
PART II
Hyunjin x reader. (s)
Too Hot To Handle Masterlist
Synopsis: You and Hyunjin become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (16,6k words)
Author's note: I edited this on my phone so there maybe a few errors, I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. Don't forget to send me feedbacks after đ
The moment you wake up, you're clutching the duvet close to your chest to cover your bare chest. You don't have the energy to look for your camisole yet, you don't even know where Hyunjin threw it last night.
Despite knowing that it's already morning, you nuzzle your head into the crook of his neck and try to get some more sleep.
From the way he rubs his hand down your back, Hyunjin has woken up from his sleep. He turns his head to the side and places a sweet kiss on your forehead.
"How was your sleep?" He asks with a hoarse voice.
"Good," you shortly reply with your eyes closed, "how was yours?"
He sleepily grins and answers, "Excellent."
He stretches his other arm and lets out a big yawn, pulling you close to cuddle you, attacking your shoulder and arm with kisses.
Someone comes knocking into the room to deliver breakfast, Hyunjin gets it for both of you since you're still looking for your camisole in between the sheets. Once you find it, you put it on and join Hyunjin at the end of the bed to have breakfast.
He's digging into his scrambled egg while you're about to start with a careful sip of coffee, and you notice that there's no milk to mix your coffee with.
"They only sent coffee and juice," you mutter as you take another sip.
"Huh?" Hyunjin confoundedly asks as he chews on a piece of toast.
"There's no milk," you show him your drinks, pointing out that there's no milk on the tray full of breakfast.
Hyunjin swallows his food and picks up his cup of coffee, "Lana knows you had your milk last night," he playfully says with a suppressed laugh.
It takes you a minute to process his words and when it finally registered, you gently slap his arm and burst out laughing too.
"What do you think about last night?" You curiously ask.
"Hot," he shortly replies as he puts down his coffee cup.
You giggle because that's the first thing that crossed his head when you asked it about it.
"You were so hot last night," he reaches for your hair and tucks it behind your ear.
"Spicy!" He adds with a hiss.
You tilt your head to the other side to let him pet your head, "We were just being fun and... kinky?"
The grin returns on his face and he leans in to kiss you on the cheek, "You're irresistible still," he says.
With your stomach full, you look out of the window and see the bright sunny day outside, instead of feeling energized after breakfast, you feel like going back to sleep and thinking of never leaving the suite.
You rest your head on Hyunjin's shoulder and sigh, "Can we just stay here from now on?"
But of course, it's not about the place, anywhere you can be alone with him is where you want to be, and last night, it was exactly how you wanted it to be, even more.
-
YOU: Last night was amazing. No way we were going to the suite and not making the most of it.
-
Last night was amazing and Hyunjin woke up feeling good.
He had you for himself all night and did what he always wanted to do to you so it feels like he's waking up from a good dream but it gets better when he opens his eyes this morning and finds you sleeping next to him.
He puts the remaining time left in the suite to good use, taking a morning shower with you and watching you getting ready in the bathroom.
With a glass of orange juice in his hand, he sits on the edge of the tub and watches you doing your hair in front of the sink. The white bikini you're wearing looks good on you, the thin straps crisscrossing on your back, tempting him to untie them all.
You know he's been watching and trying to ignore most of the time, until eventually, you turn around on your feet to look at him.
"Stop staring," you whine at him.
Hyunjin licks his lips and coyly responds, "I just can't take my eyes off you."
In fact, Hyunjin believes he has hearts in his eyes whenever he looks at you. It's been a long time since the last time he got butterflies in his stomach, he could say that he's smitten and it's all because of you.
It seems like you don't know what to say to him. You shyly smile and turn around, continuing to style your hair with that shy smile plastered on your face.
Time is running out and Hyunjin checks through the window to see that everyone else is already making their way to the cabana.
"Oh, shit," he blurts out. It dawns on him that it's reckoning time.
"What? Is it the time already?" You ask from the doorway of the bathroom.
"Yep. Are you ready?" He asks you even though he, himself, is not ready for it.
You adjust the half skirt you're wearing around your hips and come up to him, holding out your hand for him to hold.
"I'm not ready to be honest," you answer with a nervous chuckle.
He holds your hand and makes his way out of the suite with you, getting closer to disclosing the truth but whatever happens, it won't change the fact that after last night Hyunjin feels like the happiest man on earth.
-
HYUNJIN: I mean... we did try our best to spend as little money as possible.
-
As soon as you step into the cabana, you can sense that the energy is off.
Everyone looks more tense than usual and they're giving you almost the same death stare, it's like they're trying to bore a hole right between your eyes. Hyunjin guides you by the waist to sit on the sofa first then he takes a seat next to you after.
A moment passes in awkward silence until Andy opens his mouth and asks, "Anything you guys want to share?"
Hyunjin glances at you, he's smiling with his eyes and whenever he does that, you can't help but smile too. You look away and realize that they're waiting for an answer from both of you.
"We enjoyed it," you simply answer, skipping on telling them about the details.
"Enjoyed it too much, to be honest," Hyunjin suddenly adds.
Instead of easing everyone, his words only make them antsy and crestfallen. They seem to have guessed what happened last night in the suite when Lana hasn't said anything yet.
Just like your thought summons her, the cone chimes and the first thing she does is call both you and Hyunjin's names.
"Last night, I gave you the opportunity to show the group your genuine connection without surrendering to your physical desires," Lana says.
Hyunji takes your hand in his and places it on his lap as Lana continues speaking.
"However, your connection wasn't the only thing I was testing."
What? There's another test? A test that you don't know? You and Hyunjin exchange a puzzled look at each other, completely taken aback by this piece of information.
"While you were away, I gave your fellow guests a test of trust in you. If they didn't trust you, they could forfeit $10,000 to cover all of your potential rule breaks in the suite," Lana explains.
"Oh, my God..." you lowly gasp.
You're not expecting Lana would get so sneaky by putting a test on the group too, making them choose between money or trust and doing it behind your back.
"Or they could choose to have faith in you, meaning that any rule breaks would receive the appropriate financial penalties."
Whether they choose to trust you or not, what you can do is try to understand why they made that choice. From what you see, you can tell that they're not having that much faith in you and Hyunjin so it makes sense if they chose the latter.
"I can now reveal the group chose to trust you."
-
YOU: [sighs] I hope we've made the right decision.
-
They chose to put their faith in you and him. Really?
Hyunjin is completely bewildered but also perplexed. Not that he's not grateful to know they chose to trust him but really?
"I honestly don't have a lot of faith in you guys," Marie honestly shares, sounding firm as she said it.
That's exactly why it was so unexpected to him how everyone agreed to risk losing more money to trust him and you. He sees that you're having the same thoughts as him from the way your mouth gaping open in disbelief.
"It's not looking so hopeful," Edie loudly whispers.
He's not sure if she did that on purpose for everyone to hear it but he heard it and he gets it, okay? Some of them don't have that much faith in him but choose to trust him anyway.
"I must tell the group that you did..." Lana stalls the announcement to heighten the suspense.
Whatever happens, it won't be entirely his fault since he didn't take part in this other test Lana put them in. He turns to look at you and you're leaning into his shoulder, lowly whining like a wounded kitten.
"... not break any rules," Lana finally finished her words after a good minute.
The cheers erupt in the room and Andy comes charging toward him, taking him into a tight hug.
"That's my guy!" He proudly shouts.
Safe to guess that Andy is the one who persuaded everyone to trust him and that's why he's so relieved to find out he did not break any rules in the suite.
The others are coming to give him a hug too and Hyunjin never imagined people would congratulate him for not having sex. Well, there's always first for everything.
Everyone settles down since Lana hasn't done talking yet and Hyunjin back to his seat, holding your hand in his again.
"Even though you came very close to breaking the rules last night, I can confirm the prize fund still stands at $132,000," Lana announces.
It's like everyone letting out the breath they didn't know they were holding at the same time and the atmosphere significantly changes lighter and brighter.
Hyunjin almost forgot that he should give credit for himself, he didn't even know it was possible to be in a room with you and not do anything but he knows better than to not put his needs before anyone else's.
For that, he rewards himself by placing a long kiss on your cheek.
-
HYUNJIN: Who would've thought, huh? Hyunjin's not broken any rules.
-
Now that the two of you have proven to be trustworthy enough to be left alone, you can freely enjoy the afternoon sunbathing by the pool with Hyunjin.
He takes the lounger next to you and outstretches his hand so the two of you can hold hands all the time.
"You know what, babe?" He suddenly asks with his head turned to you.
"Yeah?"
He lowers his sunglasses down on the bridge of his nose, "I think we're safe to get close to each other now," he says.
It seems like he's hinting at wanting to share the lounger with you. You shield your eyes from the sun with your hand to be able to look at him.
"And what are you going to do?" You curiously ask.
Hyunjin doesn't wait for your answer, he immediately gets up and joins you on your lounger, lying facedown in between your legs. As soon as he gets comfortable, he places a kiss on your neck and another one on your jaw.
"This is much more comfortable," he says as he takes off his sunglasses and puts them aside.
You hold his head in both hands, running them through his hair and brushing it to the back. He looks so beautiful when you see him up close like this and it makes you wonder if this man truly likes you.
"You're so beautiful," you compliment as you gather all of his hair in the back of his head with your hands.
Hyunjin smiles until his eyes from two crescent moons and when he opens his eyes again, they turn fierce and slightly intense.
"You look good in white," he says with his hand reaching for the strap of your bikini, hooking his index finger around it.
"Oh, be careful there!" You warn him.
Last night, the two of you were this close to breaking the rules and miraculously managed to resist it, you think it would be a shame to fall back into bad habits after going through that.
"I may have passed the test last night but I don't know about today," he tells you, running his finger up and down the strap of your bikini.
You bring your hands to his face, cupping his jaws with both hands and softly remind him, "We have to be good!"
"I don't think I can be good for long," he tilts his head to the side and continues, "And by 'long' I mean for the next thirty minutes."
"No..." You whine and hold his chin with your hand, "We can't have this attitude, babe."
Before he can do anything about it, you take his hands and hold them in yours, keeping them away from you as a safety measure.
He leans in close enough, leaving only a few inches of space between your faces, "I miss kissing you already," he mutters with a sly grin.
Now that he mentions it, your brain automatically recalls the times when his plush lips were on yours. You can vividly imagine them against yours, soft and warm, so fucking addictive.
You can say the same thing to him but you know that would only encourage him to do it. You brush the hair falling to the side of his face and put it to the side, holding it there while you stare at his angular face.
"We'll have our moment," you hopefully say.
Hyunjin dramatically sighs then drops his head into your chest, then he continues to rest his head there while you're brushing his hair with your fingers.
"Your body is unreal, babe," he suddenly compliments with a kiss on your sternum and then rests his head in between your breasts.
You gently pat his head and say, "Actually, it's all real."
If it's hard for you, then it means it's hard for him too, and considering that he's the type who impulsively does whatever he wants, you have to appreciate his efforts for, at least, showing a little bit of restraint.
-
YOU: I'm having a good time with Hyunjin. However, I've had some unpleasant times with guys in the past but I'm trying to put my trust in him.
-
"Give us a break, Lana!" Hyunjin doesn't hold back from shouting it out loud as everyone got called to the cabana again in the afternoon.
"Please!" He emphasizes as he takes a seat on the sofa.
He offers his hand to help you take a seat next to him and he puts his hand on your back after, keeping you close to him.
It's better to be good news this time because he has not yet recovered from Lana's ruse which almost costs him a lot of money without him knowing.
"I think we deserve a rule break for did well last night," he mindlessly mutters, not realizing that everyone else can hear it too.
"No, Hyunjin. No!" Frida vehemently says.
The melodic chime instantly puts everyone into restless mode. Of course, things could go two ways, good and bad, but from past experiences, things mostly went the latter.
"Hello, everyone," Lana greets.
"Hi, Lana!" Everyone replies in unison.
He feels your hand on him and he holds it by the fingers, gently rubbing your knuckle to keep him calm.
"I have observed some early signs that connections may be starting to form. Therefore, I am sending two people on a romantic date."
"Oh, yeah!" Andy excitedly responds.
"I hope it's us," Diego says while tapping Frida's knee.
Hyunjin can't think of someone more deserving of this romantic date, it should be you and him, considering that the two of you passed the test last night. But that's just his opinion.
"However..."
"Oh, shit!" Marie blurts out.
Everyone knows that there's nothing good coming out after that word, he's right, it's going to be the latter. It's another bad news after all.
"Oh, for fuck's sake," Edouard curses with his head drop onto his hands.
"So that I can put your current connections to the test, these dates will be with two new arrivals."
The cheers are now turning into gasps and groans. He knows it's going to be bad news but he doesn't expect another test when he hardly passed the previous one.
"I have allowed the new dates to choose who they would like to take on a date," Lana explains.
"Wow!" Your eyes widen in slight shock, "I think they're going to come in like us on day one. Like hot, heavy, ready to fuck everybody."
Hyunjin has no problem with the hot and heavy part, but the fuck everybody? It's going to be a problem if that 'everybody' is you. He starts to get nervous thinking you would get picked for the date.
"The first new arrival is... Remy," Lana announces.
His fear slowly turns into a manifestation, knowing that one of the two arrivals is a guy but whoever this new guy is, he'd better not step on his toes.
"Don't like him already," Hyunjin says with a pout of displease.
"Remy has chosen..."
He tries to put on a calm face but inside, he deeply hopes this new guy doesn't choose you for the date.
"...Frida."
-
HYUNJIN: [Exhales] Thank God!
-
"The second new arrival is..."
It's safe to say that the other new arrival will be a girl since the first one is a guy and as much as you want to make Hyunjin sweat a little, you feel relieved not to get chosen for the date.
Maybe it will be you who gets to sweat a little, Hyunjin is super attractive, and it would be impossible to not get attracted by him.
"...Saskia."
There's that coo of wonder and everyone is trying to guess what she looks like just from the sole information that is her name.
"Saskia is coming in hot," Marie is the only one having fun with it since she's the one without a partner.
"Saskia has chosen..."
Lana better not say Hyunjin's name but your guts keep telling you otherwise. You feel faint the longer you have to wait for Lana to say the name, you just want to get it over with.
"...Hyunjin."
For this one time, you hate that your gut feeling turned out to be right.
"Ah, fuck!" Hyunjin lowly curses.
You can't tell if that profanity comes out of his unwillingness to go on that date or if he knows he's more likely going to mess up on that date.
"Are you alright?" He asks you.
It seems like your worries show through your facial expression that he doesn't miss it, you have no other option but to tell him the truth.
"I'm scared," you honestly answer.
"Don't be," he says with a gentle squeeze on your hand.
It's hard to even put on a smile when you can't know for sure that his head is not going to turn. You keep your head low and try to get yourself together.
"Frida and Hyunjin, it's time for you to get ready for your dates," Lana commands.
Hyunjin endearingly tucks your hair behind your ear before leaning in and kissing you on the cheek.
"I'll be right back," he mutters.
You know he'll be back but whether he'll be back with you is what concerns you. You force on a smile as he gives your hand a kiss to finally leave for his date.
Just like having a wound is not enough, Vic comes to pour salt on it by saying, "Saskia sounds so hot, I hate to admit it."
You often wonder how many girls are coming for him in the outside world but in here, all it takes is one girl to make you this anxious.
-
YOU: Taking my man on a date? Fuck that, honestly.
-
"If she's my type then fuck me," Hyunjin grumbles as he's pacing around the dressing room to get ready for the date.
Frida is quietly doing her make-up, carefully applying colors to her eyelids with a brush, she pauses to look at Hyunjin who's putting on a shirt while standing in front of a mirror.
"You're going to have to behave," she simply reminds him.
She continues with her make-up then a moment later, looks at him again to ask, "Are you nervous? Cause I'm nervous."
"I am nervous, a little bit, yeah," he coyly says, faking his calm tone.
Deep down, Hyunjin is nervous about a lot of things, but mostly nervous that he's going to fail and he's more likely to fail if this girl comes and looks a lot like his type. He came here not expecting to meet you, a girl who somehow looks like she came out of his daydreams. In other words, he can't expect the same thing won't happen in this retreat and he's sure as hell that this new girl is not going to be ugly.
The cone chimes and bursts his bubble of thoughts.
"Oh?" Frida dramatically gasps, stopping doing her make-up to listen to what Lana is going to say.
"I hope you are both looking forward to your dates this afternoon."
"Uh... yes," Hyunjin doubtfully answers while scratching the back of his head.
"To further assess how you deal with temptation, I have not told the new arrivals that they are guests on Too Hot To Handle," Lana informs, dropping the missed detail at the last minute.
Lana sure knows how to brew dramas in this retreat.
"You must decide at what point to tell them," she continues.
Frida looks at Hyunjin with her mouth slacked open and eyes widened in bewilderment, also not expecting to hear this when it's about time to go for the date.
"It's best to tell them right away," she says while fixing her hair with a comb.
"But then it won't be fun," Hyunjin jokingly says.
This is just what he needs for the date, something to add to things he should be nervous about. He checks himself one more time in the mirror and decides to tie half of his hair into a bun.
When it's time to go, he heads to the beach with Frida and has her arm linked around his.
"I'm really scared. What if they're good-looking?" Frida mutters while going down the steps that lead to the beach.
And that's not something he needs to hear before he parts ways with her since their dates are taking place in different parts of the beach.
When he arrives, he sees the new girl waving her hand at him. As he gets closer, he can see her dark wavy hair and her beautiful long neck but the eyes, the eyes are what caught his attention, they're light brown and mesmerizing.
"Hi, I'm Saskia," she introduces herself right away with a flirty smile.
Hyunjin now understands why it's called a test because he knows it's not going to be easy.
-
HYUNJIN: Fuck! This is going to be hard. Harder than I thought.
-
The date is far away from the villa so you can't really see what's happening. Even if you can see, you don't want to see or know anything about it.
You know yourself well that you're always transparent with your feelings, you express what you feel, especially now. You don't even have the energy to try to hide what you truly feel inside, it's apparent enough for people to notice that you're scared shitless with Hyunjin going on a date with another girl.
Even the gorgeous view of the sunset can't help to ease your mind. You let out a long sigh and it doesn't help to calm you either.
"I'm just going to be a nervous wreck until he comes back from the date," you openly share to Vic as the two of you share the jacuzzi together.
Vic adjusts the sunglasses perched on the top of her head and says, "It's understandable that you're nervous."
"What if he just decides they have a better connection than us?" You throw one of the many possibilities of how things going to turn out just to gaslight yourself, "And he just jumps ships?"
Vic shakes her head, refusing to believe that would be the case, "No. No way."
It's not Edouard who went on that date so you doubt Vic will completely understand how you really feel or how so many thoughts rushing through your head at a light speed and they're not the good ones.
Out of all of those negative thoughts, one positive thought emerges and assures you of something.
"I really, really like him," you admit out loud, "Like, on a deeper level and I only know that now because of this date."
This sudden realization only saddens you because you might be losing him to someone else and you don't want to lose him at all. You feel a lump forming in your throat but it burns you the more you try to swallow it down.
"If he really does jump ship, it's going to break my heart," you share another possibility that only hurts you more.
Vic places her hand on your shoulder and gently massages it, "Stop thinking about the worst scenarios," she tells you.
She's right to say that but you can't help it either. You let out a sigh but it only tightens the knot around your chest.
"The best scenario is he comes back to me, right? Butâ" you can't even finish your words without picturing it happening in your head.
"He's going to come back," Vic assures you with a caress on your back shoulder.
You lightly shake your head, "I don'tâI don't think so."
"Girl, be serious," she almost snaps at you.
"I just have this feeling..." you breathlessly mutter as you look down.
You can't shake this feeling away and the more you try to shake it away, the more it latches onto you.
-
YOU: With Hyunjin, I really let my guard down despite how the guys in the past have treated me. You know, sometimes you think they're the greatest guys in the world, and then... they're not.
-
It's like Lana scoops out his ideal type and puts it on his plate, it depends on Hyunjin whether he can resist the temptation to not feast on it.
Saskia is not ugly, she is really attractive and has a great body, she doesn't shy away from staring at him with lustful eyes, letting him know that she desires him.
"You're really pretty," she says with low giggles.
Hyunjin almost chokes on his wine, he immediately licks his lips and mutters, "Thanks."
She plays with the end of her hair, twirling it around her finger as she continues talking, "You're super cute, you have a nice smile."
He smiles in response to her compliments and he thinks it's about time to return the compliments back to her, just to be nice.
"Well, you're obviously gorgeous," he tells her.
Noticing that her glass is empty, Hyunjin hurriedly refills her glass with more bubbly wine while finding something else to talk about.
"Do you have a type?" He curiously asks.
Saskia lifts her glass close to her mouth and eagerly answers, "My type is just like you."
He must admit that he goes right into that, he tries to keep his calm and drinks his wine.
"What about you?" She asks back while seductively gazing into his eyes, "Am I your type?"
Hyunjin awkwardly chuckles, he swallows his wine first to start speaking. He's never the one to bullshit his way around, he has always been a forthright person.
"Pretty much you," he honestly answers.
Saskia smiles in satisfaction upon hearing his answer and drinks her wine with her eyes lingering on his.
He's aware of how dangerous she is and the game she's about to play but it's a game he used to play, he knows how to win it and he loves to win.
"Aren't you hot?" She suddenly asks, noticing the beads of sweat on his chest.
"I'm actually dripping in sweat," he responds, flapping the opening of his shirt to air out the trapped body heat.
Saskia tilts her head to the side and props a hand under her chin, "You can take it off," she says.
He considers it for a moment, a part of him doesn't want to do it but another part of him, the bad and most dominant, wants to impress this girl.
His hands, however, move on their own, reaching for the buttons on his shirt and taking it off of him. He knows for sure the new girl enjoys what she's seeing from the way she keeps biting her lip.
The sun is sinking lower into the horizon and it means that there's not much time left on the date, Hyunjin just can't wait to get out of this situation before something else happens.
All of a sudden, Saskia sits facing her and leans forward with both hands propped in front of her.
"Not going to lie, I'd love for a kiss," she says.
Even though the request is expected that doesn't mean Hyunjin is prepared for it, never in his life has he rejected a girl for asking for a kiss. He can't even imagine doing that, it would feel so wrong.
However, Saskia takes his silence as a yes and starts leaning into him, bringing her face close to his. She then places her hand on his thigh, her fingers playing with the hem of his swimming trunks.
"Let's see if we can do it correctly," she murmurs.
He hates that his body is so responsive to her, he's leaning into her as well and closing the gap between their faces, leaving only an inch or two of safe space.
She tilts her head to the other side with her eyes focusing on his lips, and gosh, she's so tempting that Hyunjin starts to waver, almost caving in until he remembers that he needs to tell her about the retreat.
He quickly pulls away and lets out a chuckle, "Nah, I can't."
Saskia seems to be disappointed, she looks away and chugs her wine.
"You're teasing me," she grumbles.
He doesn't know how to break the news to her because it seems like she's not going to like to hear it, but he does enjoy having the power to ruin her fantasy.
"Uh... there is a reason why I can't give you a kiss," he begins.
Saskia puts her glass down and looks at him again, intrigued.
"Huh? Why?"
He's stalling from telling her the truth just to savor the moment. After a while, he licks his lips and talks again.
"We're all in a retreat and we're not allowed to do sexual stuff like..."
Saskia's hand flies to her mouth to cover her gasp of shock, "Are you kidding?"
Hyunjin shakes his head while chuckling, "There's no kissing, no touching, no sex at all," he continues.
"What?" Saskia's eyes widen in horror as she processes this shocking news.
He starts to wonder if this is how he looks like when he finds out that he's in a sexless retreat, all he can remember is how flabbergasted he was.
"You're on Too Hot To Handle," he finally breaks the news.
It's good that she knows what show it is and that way, she can process the news better than he did. Yet, it doesn't help to diminish the shock on her face.
"No fucking way!" Saskia gasps again.
He gives her more time to process things and calmly finishes his wine while Saskia is going through five stages of grief at the moment.
"How much for a kiss though?" She suddenly asks.
"Six grand for a kiss," he answers.
Saskia purses her lips, seeming to consider spending 6 grand for a kiss with him, "I don't mind spending that much money," she shamelessly says.
That only confirms your guess about these new arrivals, that they come here hot and heavy, ready to fuck everybody. But In this case, he is the 'everybody'.
"I can't do another rule break, I've reached my credit limit," he jokingly says.
Saskia nods and slyly smiles at him, "Next time maybe."
-
HYUNJIN: I think with the other head most of the time but I decide to trust myself and make myself proud by the end of the date.
-
When you think things could not get any worse for you, it gets even worse.
You feel sick because Hyunjin has been gone all day, having a date with another girl and you don't know anything about the date except that the girl has the balls to take him on a date and you don't like her already for that.
Now, they're back from the date with arms linked around each other.
You think Hyunjin knows better than to not disrespect you like that, looking smiley with the new girl and not thinking about how you feel about it whatsoever.
Your attention somehow shifts to the girl and how attractive she is, the type that is capable of stealing Hyunjin's gaze away.
You slump on the sofa and heavily sigh, "Ugh, she's like my twin but ten times better," you grumble, almost losing it already.
"Impossible. You're one hell of a sexy babe," Edie assures you with a hand on your knee.
Edie only said that to make you feel better but that only upset you more, "Yeah? Have you seen her?"
She looks through your shoulder to see Hyunjin introduce the new girl around to everyone gathering on the terrace, she seems to change her mind about what she said earlier but finds another thing to say to comfort you.
"I can see how much Hyunjin likes you," she assures you again.
What she said doesn't stop your tears from crawling out of your throat, you can feel it burning your windpipe like a hot coal.
"I can't do this," you say with a quivering voice.
Without saying anything, you dash to the bedroom to be on your own, it's better to process your emotions alone than explode around people and risk hurting them without meaning to.
You run to your bed and lie down, putting your arm over your eyes just trying not to cry. You don't want to show your emotions to him, not when he can easily trample all over it.
-
YOU: I really like him and I just hope he likes me enough to not want to hurt me.
-
Hyunjin is the one to blame when he sees you looking very upset.
He knows you're alone in the bedroom. On one hand, he doesn't want to intrude on your personal space but on the other hand, he knows he needs to fix this situation.
After taking a moment by himself in the dressing room and planning the things to say to you, he goes to the bedroom. He finds you lying on your shared bed, you remove your hand from covering your eyes to see him coming.
He hates seeing your frown instead of a smile when you notice him coming. He slowly gets onto the bed, sitting on the edge to put a bit of space between you and him.
"Are you alright?" He softly asks.
You stack your hands on your stomach and keep looking straight ahead, not answering him.
It's a wrong situation to laugh, he tries so hard not to but you look so adorable, being mad at him and at the same time, tempting him to kiss that cute pout.
The first one doesn't get any answers, he tries again with a different question, "How have you been feeling?"
You gently pinching on your forearm while keep pouting and finally answer him, "Like shit."
How do you look this cute when you're mad? He struggles to not try to smooch those pursed lips.
Hyunjin bravely settles down next to you, lying on his side facing you, and starts telling you about the date.
"I just want to be honest..." he begins.
"It was really difficult because this new girlâ She's my type."
That's not how he should start the conversation but he does that as a way to tease you, making you madder just to see how cute you could get.
"If I'd met her first, we could've had something," he adds.
"If you want to be with her, it's okay," you coyly say but the way you keep pinching the skin on your forearm tells him otherwise.
He quietly smiles and notices that you just dramatically roll your eyes at him.
"It's okay?" He teases you more.
You nod, then let out a low sigh and start hugging yourself, "And I'll do what I want. I'm going to hook up with someone else, I'm not stupid."
You start pinching at the skin on your neck now and that's when he discovered it's something you do when you're nervous.
"I'm fucking gorgeous," you boldly remark.
Seeing you putting a good defense makes Hyunjin can't hold his laughter in anymore, he lets them out and then nuzzles his head in your neck.
"You are fucking gorgeous," he confirms.
He puts his hand across your chest and pulls you closer to him, you're still looking mad even though he's holding you close like this.
"Nothing happened," he tells you, hoping that it's something you've been waiting to hear from him.
You slightly turn your head his way but your eyes are still avoiding him, "But did she want something to happen?"
He gulps air because it feels like you knew but how can you know when the date took place quite far from the villa?
"I think... yeah," he answers because lying would only make it worse.
"Did she say she wanted to kiss you?" You ask again.
"It was implied," he replies, half lying to spare the poor girl from unnecessary hate.
Hyunjin decides to take over the conversation because you don't need to hear about the details, what you need to hear is that he didn't commit a breach of the rules with her. He would only do that with you and only you.
The most important thing that you need to hear is his true intention.
"I didn't want to do that to you," he sincerely shares with you.
You get quiet for a moment and finally, you turn your head and look him in the eyes for the first time tonight. It feels nice to see the warmth fill your eyes again.
"Did you miss me?" You ask with wide, puppy eyes at him.
He presses his mouth close to the side of your head, "A lot," he answers.
A smile rises on your face the second you hear his answer and oh, it's nice to finally see your smile too. He likes how such a simple thing could warm his heart.
"Can I have a hug now? Cause I really need it," He sweetly asks.
You eagerly nod and throw your arms around him, letting him wrap his arms around you in return, staying like that long enough for a lewd thought to pop into Hyunjin's head.
He only notices the short dress you're wearing the moment his hand meets the hem of your dress on your mid-thigh. He hurriedly covers the back with a cushion to not risk exposing you to the camera.
He then places his hand on your waist and pulls you even closer, planting his plush lips on your neck to compensate for not being able to kiss your lips.
"You are so fucking gorgeous," he teases you by saying your words back at you, sending you into a series of giggles.
-
HYUNJIN: I was so tempted. Am I proud of it? Not really, but I didn't kiss Saskia.
-
When morning comes, you turn around on the bed and find Hyunjin is still sleeping. You use the opportunity to touch his facial features that perfectly complement each other but you find yourself hesitant to touch him.
You use your index finger to boop his nose first, doing it gently to not wake him up from his sleep. He doesn't steer in his sleep, you continue using your finger to touch his lips next, swiping your thumb across his lower lip that slightly jutting out more than his upper lip.
When you think he's still sleeping, he suddenly opens his mouth and bites at your finger, tugging it between his teeth even though you're yelping in pain. Having enough fun, he finally lets go and bursts into laughter while you're observing the bite mark around your finger.
He takes it close to his lips and kisses it as a way to soothe the pain. He puts your hand around his waist after.
"Morning," he mumbles with half-shut eyes.
"Morning," you mumble back.
Hyunjin puckers his lips at you, asking for a kiss but you're quick enough to cover it with your hand, not wanting to rule break this early in the day.
However, he continues attacking you with kisses all over your face and even plants a few kisses on your blocked lips.
"Did anyone break any rules last night?" Pablo asks everyone in the room when they are barely awake yet.
No one is answering him whether it's because they don't want to deal with it or someone did break the rules and decide to stay quiet.
Pablo moves on to the next question, "How about the ones going on the dates?"
His eyes dart toward Frida which she immediately denies with a head shake, then he turns at Hyunjin next. But the new girl answers it for him.
"We didn't break any rules," she says with her wavy hair tousled so beautifully like he has spent hours styling it.
"Yeah, we didn't break any rules," Hyunjin confirms.
It's relieving to hear that they are in fact nothing happened between them and getting that reassurance puts you at ease.
Curious, you turn to look at the bed across from yours, where the new arrivals sleep together, and ask, "Was he well-behaved?"
Saskia glances at Hyunjin before looking back at you and instead of answering, she giggles in response, making you wonder if you should be worried about it.
As you're about to ask further about it, Hyunjin pulls you by the shoulder until you collapse on the bed and allow him to rest his head on your chest to catch a few more minutes of sleep.
A little after lunch, everyone is called to the palapa for another workshop. The previous one was fun so you expect this one would be the same too, if not more.
"Hey, hey, how are you?" The guy in workout attire cheerily greets.
You assume he's going to be the one leading the workshop this time, and you politely smile back and greet back.
"It's great being here with you. I'm Dustin and I'm a choreographer," he introduces himself.
Everyone gives him a round of applause to welcome him.
"Today, we're going to work on body expression. We know body language is important, right? And we're going to use dance to our advantage," he explains today's workshop to everyone in the same cheery tone.
Dustin takes a moment to look at the group of people lining up in front of him to finally start the workshop.
"First, I'd like you to make pairs," he orders.
Everyone is going to their chosen partner and you're obviously paired up with Hyunjin, standing next to him as he puts his arm around your shoulder.
Dustin lets out a low chuckle then says, "You guys went straight to each other but let's mix it up a little to see what happens."
He scans the group and points his hand at someone, "You," he says to the new girl, Saskia.
She comes up to him and he makes her stand next to him while he chooses a partner for her.
"And you," he points in your direction but not at you, he points at Hyunjin.
What are the chances that he paired him with the new girl? It's like the universe is working against you and you quietly scoff in disbelief.
Dustin makes them stand next to each other as he explains what they're going to do while you constantly remind yourself to keep your facial expression in check, not letting anyone see how annoyed you are over petty things like this.
"We're going to suggest some kind of feeling to our partner like sadness, joy, anger and..." he pauses to turn their bodies, making them stand facing each other, "And the person will have to dance, expressing this feeling to their partner."
He sets them as an example for everyone and takes a step back as he comes with further instructions.
"You'll tell her the first feeling you want her to express through dance," Dustin instructs.
Hyunjin glances at him, making sure that he heard his instruction right and Dustin confirms with a single nod. He then thinks for a moment to come up with an answer.
"Uhm... anger?"
Dustin then instructs Saskia to dance according to the expression Hyunjin asked her to do so he starts moving her body, expressing that feeling by rolling her body and flipping her hair.
You're not sure if she expresses anger well with how many times she rolls her body his way. To you, it seems like she's trying to seduce him instead of showing anger through movements.
Saskia ends her dance with giggles, "That's all I got," she shyly says
"Well done!" Dustin praises her.
He shifts his attention to Hyunjin now, "Now, it's your turn," he tells him.
"What do you want him to do?"
"Desire," Saskia firmly answers.
It's like she's been waiting to say that and she smiles in satisfaction knowing that she's about to get what she wants.
Hyunjin's tongue is slightly sticking out on one corner of his mouth, you don't know how he's going to express 'desire' but you know you're not going to like it.
He begins by going around her and slowly, he gets closer to her, bumping his chest against her body and putting his head close to hers. Jealousy aside, he really does express the feeling of desire, you can see how much he desires her from his body movements. Thus, makes you even jealous of her.
When it finally ended, you joined everyone else in giving them a round of applause for setting a good example for everyone.
-
YOU: [Exhales] I can't hide my feelings, I express them. I giggled and clapped so no one would know that I wasn't happy.
-
For the next part, Dustin lets everyone back to their former partner and Hyunjin hurriedly gets back to your side.
The workshop continues with Dustin ordering everyone to freely dance with their partner as the music plays in the background.
Any reason to get physical with you is a win for Hyunjin so he tries to make the most of it. He pulls you close, putting his arms around your waist while swaying your body side to side in sync.
You feel a little reluctant to follow the movement of his body, you feel a little rigid even. Then he realizes that it must be about the thing earlier with the new girl, you're jealous and he thinks that's cute of you.
He finds a way to make you lighten up, he gives you a twirl and pulls you back in, this time, he holds you from behind with his arms wrapped around you.
"When we dance, we flirt, we talk to someone, we communicate and connect to our body there with the vibration, our movements so I hope to see a little bit of that today," Dustin informs the group.
And Hyunjin does exactly that, talking with his body and letting you know how much he desires you. But first, he needs to get you out of this funk, he nuzzles his nose into your neck to tickle you there.
"Stop it," you whine in complaint.
That only encourages him to do it more, tickling your neck with kisses until you break into laughter in his hold.
"Come on. Dance with me," he whispers and then takes a playful bite at your ear.
For a split second, he thought you were about to get away from him with the way you got his hands off of you until you slid them down to each side of your hips and put your hands on top.
You drop your head onto his shoulder, turning your head his way and curve your hand around his neck, looking into each other's eyes as he guides your body to move along to his movements.
It's a real struggle when your lips are mere inches away from him and he can't kiss it, he keeps licking his lips and gulps air as he looks at your tantalizing lips.
"Next, we're going to take turns sitting on the chair while your partner gives you a lap dance," Dustin instructs, shattering his intense gaze at you.
"First, I'd like to see the ladies be the dominants and the men will be submissive," he further instructs.
Hyunjin drags a chair to the center of the room and before he can place it right where he wants, you roughly push him until he plops onto the chair.
Unlike most men, Hyunjin doesn't take pride in being dominant, he thinks there has to be balance to it, and looking at you being the one taking control, oh, he doesn't mind being a submissive.
You take a step back and just stand there looking at him, eyes traveling down his body from head to toe and back to his eyes. The way you're looking at him makes him the slightest bit intimidated, a bit nervous but mostly, excited for what's coming to him.
Then you come up to him, placing your hands on his knees and bending down to be on the same eye level with him. You're tilting your head side to side and without him knowing, he mimics it, tilting his head from side to side.
"Give it to me, baby," he mutters to you.
His eyes heavily focused on your lips that are merely an inch away from his and a whimper slips out his mouth as you drag your lips down his jaw.
"Give it to me. I'm ready," he manages to still dare you even though his heart is pounding inside his chest.
Hyunjin stifles his breath as you slowly bring your head down his chest and to his surprise, parting his legs open wide. He notices the sly smile dancing on your pretty face, malicious yet sexy as hell.
"Who gives you the permission to be this fucking hot?" He asks you while boldly holding your gaze.
Instead of answering, you drop to the floor and run your hands down his thighs. Seeing your head between his legs sends his head into a frenzy with the amount of lewd thoughts he's getting in a second.
You bring your hands up his thighs and stop just right on his pelvic bones, so close to where he wants you the most.
Then you turn around on your feet, swinging your hips side to side, presenting him the view of your curvaceous and voluptuous body that makes him salivate.
Again, you surprise him by plopping down onto his crotch, hard, earning a groan that escapes his parted open mouth. There's nothing he can complain about when he likes how you keep surprising him and teasing him, making a fool out of him.
"I'm not okay," he sighs while shaking his head, overwhelmed.
You take his hands that have been lying limply on his side, you're using them to touch your neck and trace the sides of your body, and then you rest them on your thighs.
Slowly, you rest your back against his chest and rest your head on his shoulder, looking at him with lustful eyes.
"Fuck! You're so hot," he sighs with his hot breath brushing your cheek.
You slip your hand in his hair, tugging at it hard enough to angle his head so you can gain access to his neck to plant soft kisses on it.
"Do what you want to me. I'm yours," he murmurs with his eyes fluttering shut.
Hyunjin is close to losing it as his swimming trunks begin to tighten and his breathing becomes erratic. Another minute of it and he's sure as hell, he'd be gone.
Thankfully, Dustin announces that it's time to switch. Hyunjin happily takes his turn to tease and seduce you, completely losing the purpose of this workshop. If you want desire then he'll give you exactly that, not less but maybe more.
He gentlemanly leads you to your seat and offers his hand to help you sit on the chair. He gives you a sweet kiss on the cheek before standing right in front of you, gazing into you lovingly and it gradually turns into a fierce one.
Hyunjin makes his first move by removing his top, then tosses the piece of clothing to you which you enthusiastically hold close to your chest and shamelessly take a sniff at it.
He closes the gap by standing, hovering above you, and takes your hands in his. He takes them with him, using them to touch his chest then drags them down his abs. He likes how your touch feels on him, eager yet curious, full of passion.
"Mmh... yes, that's right, it's all yours," he tells you with his eyes heavy with desire and head slightly nodding.
He takes your hands for another trip down his front, letting you use your fingernails this time because he wants to see how your scratches would look on him.
Hyunjin's next move requires him to get behind you, lifting one of your arms in the air so he can make a trail of kisses down your inner arm. The trail ends on the crook of your neck with a long, lingering kiss that gets him drunk with the natural scent of your skin.
Next, he brushes your hair to the back and gathers it in his hands, forming a makeshift ponytail so he can put all of your hair away to expose the nape of your neck to him, and that way, he can kiss you there.
Like it or not, he can hear the low moans spilling out of your mouth as he keeps peppering your neck with slobbering kisses. He angles your head to the side and plants his mouth on your jaw, taking a playful bite at it.
He wraps his hand around your neck and forces you to keep your head tilted all the way to the back while tightening the hold around your neck as he continues nibbling on your ear.
It's not hard to tell that what he did so far makes you aroused but he hasn't pulled his ultimate move yet. He stands close to you with his hand steadily tugging your hair, making you look up at him as he moves his hips back and forth.
The eyes you're giving him keep the motions of his hips going at a slow, steady pace, and in his head, he's fucking you right now.
"You like it slow, huh?" He asks you in a low, sultry voice.
"Uh-huh," you answer with wide eyes innocently looking at him.
Fuck. It makes him impatient for this retreat to be over so he can fuck you without making everyone else mad for doing it.
Dustin finishes the workshop right on time and Hyunjin couldn't be more grateful for it. If this workshop continues for another minute, there's a big chance that someone would break the rules and there's a bigger chance that it's him.
-
HYUNJIN: [Whistles] Things were really hot and I think it messed with my head a little [laughs]
-
As much as you trust Hyunjin, you can't ignore the fact that you don't know how much he has progressed in this retreat and it makes you wonder if he has left his old player self.
The only way to find out whether you can fully trust him or not is by getting both sides of the story of how the date went yesterday and see if it is the same as what he told you.
There's a party tonight to welcome the new arrivals and while everyone is busy dressing up for it, you pull Saskia aside.
"Can we talk for a minute?" You quietly ask to not let anyone in the dressing room hear it.
Saskia puts down her makeup bag on the vanity and follows you to the bedroom, it's empty so you can freely talk in there.
Once you are both seated on Edie's bed since it's the closest to the door, you skip the formality and go straight into the matter.
"If you don't mind, I want to hear details from you about the date," you tell her, keeping your tone casual and calm, "He said you wanted to kiss him but I obviously don't know if that's true."
She seems to catch the intention behind this talk right away, she crosses her legs and props her hand against the mattress.
"Well," she pauses to let out a sigh and brushes her hair to the back, "If you were there, I think you would definitely feel mugged off."
Here comes the first sign that confirms your fear, you remind yourself to not get emotional yet.
"Yeah?"
"He was basically flirting with me and we were almost about to kiss like... literally having our faces this close to each other," she describes the proximity by leaning in close to you like what people do when they're about to kiss someone.
"We kept coming closer and closer, then he said he couldn't kiss me because of the rules," Saskia explains while her fingers pick at the crimped fabric of the duvet under her.
"Said he spent too much money already," she adds.
It feels like your heart just dropped to your stomach and you suddenly feel sick. You force yourself to maintain your composure to continue the talk.
"So he said it has nothing to do with me?" You ask.
"Not really anything to do with you," she meekly answers with pity in her eyes.
Again, it's hard to not show your feelings but this much disappointment is not easy to hide, you're not even sure you can bear it.
"I'm sorry. I had no idea you guys were that deep with each other," Saskia sincerely apologizes with her hand on your knee.
You swallow your tears and keep them down, looking down at your hands to not letting her see you crushed and devastated.
"It's okay. It's all his fault," you tell her while keeping your head down.
"Where do you think this leaves you and him now then?" You curiously ask.
"I don't know but I'm not that attracted to him, not anymore," she answers.
Saskia didn't know any better but at least she was honest and yes, Hyunjin was honest about the kiss too but the rest... he hid it from you, he made it seem like you did not even exist in this retreat, as if you were nothing.
"I'm so sorry," she says again as the two of you exchange a friendly hug to signify that there's no bad blood between the two of you from this moment on.
"It's okay," you say but you know that this is not okay.
-
YOU: I feel like shit right now. I feel so disrespected [sniffles] I... haven't liked someone like this in so long and he didn't even think about me once.
-
It's a party but why aren't you having fun?
Everything is going so well, especially after the workshop but something else must have happened a little after that because your mood significantly changed. All you've been doing is standing on the side and quietly sipping your wine.
You were chipper when you were picking out a costume for tonight's theme party and then he lost you for a moment after that, so it's most likely that something happened during that moment.
What is it?
Hyunjin rakes his brain to try to guess what is it that he did that may have caused this. The thing about the date or the incident at the workshop, they all have been resolved so he can't think of any other things other than that.
That leaves him with no choice but to ask about it himself. However, when he looks around, you aren't where the last time he saw you but he catches you walking toward the villa.
He puts his drink away and follows you there, finding you in the bedroom by yourself.
The first thing that comes to him is that you're feeling not well tonight. He sits next to you on the bed and gently places his hand on your shoulder.
"You alright?" He asks.
You stay quiet for a good minute then lift your head, you inhale air before speaking.
"Do you have anything you want to say to me?" You ask out of the blue.
Well, he comes here to ask you, not the other way around so that makes his second guess that you're simply not in the mood tonight.
"No," he innocently replies.
"No?"
"No."
"About the date? How you and me are nothing?" You ask again with eyebrows furrowed.
"I didn't say that," he immediately denies.
"You didn't want to kiss her just because of the rules," you remind him of what he said during the date.
Hyunjin did say that but in his defense, the rules are the main reason why he couldn't kiss her.
"It wasn'tâ"
"Those words came out of your mouth. Not because of me, it's cause you didn't want to lose money," you say again to refresh his memory of what he said.
Then it hits hit that he did, unintentionally, remove you from the equation, he did not think of you during the date.
"I didn't really cross your mind during the date, huh?" Your voice breaks at the end of your sentence.
The cruelest part of this is not finding out that he made a mistake, it's not realizing that he didn't think of you or your feelings, and completely forgot about you the moment another girl appears in front of him.
And honestly, he feels sick at how fucked up he was for that. Nothing can justify this.
"Is that how you feel?" You sadly ask him.
Despite everything, his feelings remain the same to you. He kneels on the floor so he can look at your eyes and tell you how he really feels.
"That's not how I feel," he convinces you, putting his hands on yours.
He can see that you're on the verge of tears and trying so hard to not cry, this is breaking him, his heart sinks seeing like this.
"I'm genuinely hurt because my feelings for you are genuine," you openly share.
"So are mine," he responds.
"Then why are you telling her something different?"
"I don'tâ" he runs his hand through his hair and tries to find in him the reason why.
After a moment, he hates that he can't find the reason why he did what he did, it was all... him. That's just who he is, his old self that still dominates him.
"I just did," he admits in defeat.
You scoff in disbelief and press your index finger to the corner of your eye to keep the tears from coming out.
"I gave you a chance to tell me the truth," you hoarsely say.
Hyunjin can no longer look into your eyes again without feeling like an asshole for hurting you. He looks away and stares at how your hands slightly trembling in his.
"I think it's the fact that I'm not used to this, to one girl," he tries to find the simplest explanation for his behavior.
He is used to jumping from one girl to another without attachment whatsoever, he doesn't feel like he owes anyone anything, that's how it's always been to him.
"You've really hurt me and I don't usually get hurt," you say between your sniffles.
You push the heel of your hands to your eyes to stop yourself from crying, "I really thought you felt the same..."
He rubs the skin on your knee while wistfully looking at you trying to hold yourself back from crying.
"I do," he weakly tells you.
"It's also the fact that this girl has only been here for a day and you're already back to your old self like..." your voice turns lower and lower, cracking in between words.
"This is why I don't let my guard down," you regretfully say.
And it seems like you're no longer able to hold yourself back anymore, you choke on air and then break into tears, crying into your hands.
He caused this, that's all he can think of and he can't even forgive himself for doing that.
-
HYUNJIN: This is typical of me, I always try and get my own way. I realize that I can't treat people that way.
-
Hyunjin wakes up only to live in another nightmare.
He couldn't sleep well for the past couple of nights, not only because he isn't sharing the bed with you anymore. What has been keeping him up all night is all of those thoughts about the way he acted and the consequence of it, how it costs him you, and this connection that he's been building with you. He ruined all of that with one, selfish act.
It feels a lot worse because he's still in the same bedroom with you but you're sharing the bed with someone else. Hyunjin doesn't want this, he wants you back by his side and to continue building a connection with you. In order to achieve that he has to find a way to fix this.
How can he fix this?
The news travels fast, especially with the twelve of them locked inside a villa, everyone knows that something happened and the two of you are on the brink of collapsing.
"I shot myself in the foot, didn't I?" He regretfully sighs as he sits on the warm sand.
"You absolutely have," Diego says, kicking him to the curb, "you went on a date with Saskia and you said some stupid things you shouldn't have said."
Hyunjin doesn't need to be reminded of the things he did and said, he's well aware of that because the more he hears it, the more awful he sounds and the worse he feels about himself.
"I downplayed her feelings. All I was thinking is how to impress this girl in front of me," he explains, and talking about it helps him to see where he did wrong.
"That's how I have always been, self-centered and thoughtless," he remarks, fully acknowledging his shortcomings with a heavy heart.
Hyunjin can't be annoyed at the situation, it's his own doing and you have the right to be upset.
"It gets to me... how much I like her," Hyunjin openly admits while looking out at the vast sea, blue as far as he can see.
"You know you have this emotional connection with her and that's why you're here, to develop that," Diego reminds him of the aim of this retreat.
"I know but it's just thatâ it's my old, selfish self. I can't just turn into this good guy in one night," he says, not seeing any way he can magically turn himself into a
"But you can try. You're here, you have the time and chance to talk to her," Diego offers a solution.
But of course, it's easier said than done.
It's going to be difficult because he hasn't talked to you ever since that night and he's not sure if you will let him talk or if you're willing to listen to him in the first place.
Diego pats Hyunjin's shoulder and then gives it a firm squeeze, "Just tell her how you feel."
When Hyunjin first heard that Diego has a daughter, he didn't believe it because he looks and acts like a typical guy his age, he's in here in a sexless retreat with him and that says something.
After having this talk, he can see the mature side of Diego, and it feels nice and safe, Hyunjin feels like he can openly share his thoughts with him without being judged.
With his help, Hyunjin finally figured out how to fix things with you.
-
HYUNJIN: I've learned a lesson here. I'm going to have to talk to her soon and tell her that I'm all in for her now.
-
At least, there's a positive outcome of this, that you and Saskia are now close friends since becoming bedmates.
Now that you're getting to know her more, you find a friend in her, one hell of an attractive friend and you're not jealous at all, if anything, you admire her.
She's been helping you cope with things as you need to give yourself some time to decide if you want to move things forward.
"What do you think Hyunjin thinks of our friendship?" Saskia asks as she's waist-deep in the pool and wades her hands in the water.
You crack a laugh hearing her random question but you see the hilarity in it, you also didn't expect to be friends with her after what happened.
"I think he is jealous," you answer with another wave of laughter, "He wanted both of us and now he's got neither of us."
Saskia walks up to the edge of the pool to get close to you, "I think you shouldn't let him off easy or he's not going to learn anything from that."
"Yeah," you agree with her on that.
"Take as much time as you want. Make him sweat. You'll know whether you want to rekindle things with him or not."
You nod again in agreement.
"For me, personally, something like that would put me off completely but you guys have had that time together," she gives her opinions on things.
To be honest, you're still confused even after taking a couple of days away from each other. On hand, you want to make him suffer but on the other hand, you still do like him. But obviously, you've been hurt and you can't risk letting him do that again to you.
"I'm just going to play it cool and sit back, watch how he moves," you tell her.
"Mm-hmm."
"If he's genuinely sorry, then he'll show it, right?"
"Right," Saskia approves of your plan.
"If not, then I'd consider it as a lucky escape."
"Yeah."
It's unfair that you've been dragging her into your drama so you steer the conversation to her court and you happen to have a question you've been meaning to ask her.
"So... enough about Hyunjin. I want to know what do you think of all the boys in this villa?"
Saskia shyly smiles and wades her hands in the water again, "Which one in particular?"
Since Hyunjin is out of the equation now, you try to guess which one of them would fit Saskia's type and you can safely bet that it's the new guy who came with her.
"Let's start with... Remy," you intently watch her reaction at the mention of his name.
"I think he's cute," she answers with another shy smile.
You can see that sure your guess is right, she's interested in him, "And...?"
"I feel like he's the most charming guy in the villa," she adds
"Do you want to kiss him?" You ask out of pure curiosity.
She smiles then stifles a nod, "Just to see if there's anything, you know, more," she says with a giggle.
You squeal in excitement because you see the potential in them forming as a couple.
"I honestly think you guys would look good together," you comment.
"I hope so," Saskia answers, a little flustered.
Even though you're not in a state where you can be happy, you do feel happy for her, well, at least, she's not afraid of forming a connection after seeing what happened to you.
-
YOU: I know my self-worth and Hyunjin is going to have to work for it because I don't deserve to be hurt.
-
When Lana calls everyone to the cabana, you feel less anxious than usual.
Your romance is very much non-existent these past few days and that will automatically clear you from the rule breaks. But seeing all these small gifts on the table, you wonder if she finally has good news to share this time.
"Is it Christmas today?" Andy jokingly says.
The others are laughing at that and taking a seat with their eyes set on the gifts on the table, also guessing if that's what they think it is.
"I hope it's one of those vibrating panties," Vic jokes.
Everyone abruptly stops laughing as the chime comes, they sit straighter and ready to listen to the big boss in the house.
"Hello, everyone," Lana greets.
"Hi, Lana!" You softly reply while fixing the strap of your bikini top.
"I have a gift for each of you," she confirms everyone's guess.
Everyone claps in excitement or simply because they finally receive good news for the first time in a long time.
"I hope it's a 6 feet tall and dark handsome man," Marie shouts her wish out loud.
"The gift will serve as a reward for those couples who show me that they are taking the right steps towards deeper connections," Lana explains the intention behind the gifts, "They will be given the chance to take those connections further."
Everyone is cheering at the mention of the word 'reward' and ignoring the fact that to get it, they have to earn it first. You join the cheers anyway, not wanting to ruin the joyous moment.
"All together!" Diego orders everyone to open the gifts at the same time.
Inside the box, you find a smartwatch, and seeing everyone put it on right away, you follow suit. You put the strap around your wrist and get help from Edie to clasp it for you.
"When I observe two people forming a genuine connection, they will be given a green light, like this..."
At once, everyone's watches chime and lights up in the same green colors.
"... where the rules do not apply for a limited amount of time."
Everyone cheers again, only focusing on the 'rules do not apply' part and dismissing the 'limited amount of time' part.
"I would like to remind you that those that do not receive a green light are not displaying enough progress," Lana warns that the watches came with terms and conditions.
That's the scariest part for you.
Progress, you feel like you haven't progressed much in this retreat or show Lana that you have enough progress to continue your journey in this retreat.
"Please use your time wisely," Lana ends with a last warning.
"Thank you, Lana!" Everyone shouts at the same time to the cone.
The dressing room is buzzing as everyone gets ready for the night, especially those who are in couples. Diego and Frida, Andy and Edie, got chosen to go on dates by Lana in the hope of helping them get the green lights tonight.
"I really want to get a green light but I don't know if that's possible," you take a jab at yourself while applying blush to your cheeks.
Saskia stops drawing her eyebrow just to laugh, "I'm really hoping it goes green with Remy but I wouldn't mind if it goes green with you too," she says.
Not that you don't want to kiss her but there's another person you would like to get a green light with.
-
YOU: Obviously, the first person that comes to mind is Hyunjin but he needs to apologize first and prove to me that he likes me.
-
It's time for Hyunjin to have a talk with you.
The talking part is not the hardest part, it's not knowing whether you will take him back or not that makes his heart race in his chest.
He prepared himself physically, checking his appearance in the bathroom mirror before heading to the bedroom. He can easily spot you with the red dress that looks stunning on you, chatting with Saskia on your shared bed.
He takes a long, deep breath and takes wide strides to prepare himself mentally now.
Saskia is the first one who sees him coming as she abruptly stops talking midsentence and not long after, you look over your shoulder to see it yourself.
He looks at Saskia and politely asks, "Saskia, can I have a chat with her, please? For a minute?"
She glances at you to check if you're okay with it then looks back at him once she gets the signal.
"Okay, sure," she says.
"Thank you," he mutters at her.
Saskia fixes the hem of her dress before getting up and leaves to give you both some privacy.
Since you sit on your bed, Hyunjin takes a seat on the next bed and sits facing you. You remain quiet, just waiting for him to start talking while playing with your hair.
Hyunjin suddenly gets nervous and he's not the type to easily get nervous. He wipes his palms against his jeans and actively tells his brain to start computing words to say to you.
"How are you doing?" He asks.
You stop playing with your hair and slightly recline to the side with one hand propped against the bed.
"Good," you shortly answer, "It was nice not sharing the bed with you."
He's not sure if that's an honest answer or you just want to be sarcastic, either way, he'll receive both answers well.
"Yeah, it was nice sleeping in the doghouse bed," he decides to respond with a joke at himself.
"Yeah?" You ask with intimidating eyes.
"That was a joke. I obviously want you there in the bed with me," he changes his mind immediately and makes it clear that it's not his intention to upset you more.
You stay quiet as if what he said is a lie and again, he understands that.
"I do," he convinces you.
"But do you realize that what you did is wrong? Really wrong?"
"Yes, I do," he hastily answers, "I messed up, I didn't think about the repercussions of my actions."
You keep looking at him, giving him the chance to explain himself and this is probably the only chance he'll get so he takes it, making the most out of it.
"I was being immature. I was inconsiderate about your feelings and at that time, I felt like it was okay to do that because you probably would hurt me too," he explains as best as he could.
"But I knew that in the back of my head, I had no interest in her whatsoever. It was just... she's attractive and I was just playing the game back at her, but she isn't you. We didn't click the way we do."
You look down at your lap and your fingers are fiddling with the silky fabric of your dress, he guesses you need time to process his explanations before making a decision.
He uses the opportunity to convince you about his true feelings for you.
"I'd never lost my head over someone like this. Like, when I wake up, I'm excited to see you. Just you, no one else."
Telling you that makes him even sure of his feelings for you because it feels good letting them out, and strangely, he's not scared about you not reciprocating it.
Then he notices the small smile that rises on your beautiful face, it reminds him of how much he missed seeing you smile.
"It's been hard not speaking to you," you admit.
"Me too," he meekly says and it's nice to know that you relate to his suffering.
"But as much as I want to, I had to make sure that your head and your heart are in the right place," you tell him.
If it's obvious enough that his head and his heart are right there on you, then he has to say it, out loud and with all of his heart
"I like you. I really, really like you," he assures you and he would tell you a hundred more times if you want him to.
You clasp your hands together in front of you and inhale air through your nose, it seems like you've come to a decision.
"Well, at the end of the day, everyone makes mistakes," you remark.
Hyunjin's heart starts to fill with hope again but he can't pop the confetti yet since you haven't finished talking. He patiently waits and opens his ears to listen to the rest of it.
"I do believe in second chances," you tell him.
Hearing that, he can't stop himself from smiling.
"But, just so you know, there will not be a third," you warn him.
It's like he gets another chance in life too and he can finally breathe again. His heart is filled with warmth again, he's smiling ear to ear again and finally, he has you back by his side again.
"Can we cuddle now?" He sweetly asks, opening his arms to invite you into his embrace.
You get up and walk up to him, sitting sideways on his lap as he dearly wrapped his arms around you. He sneaks a kiss on your temple then buries his head in your chest.
"Missed you," he murmurs and his heart aches saying that.
You put your hands around him and softly say, "Missed you too."
Hyunjin is the happiest he has ever been in this retreat but he realizes that this happiness comes with a cost, therefore, he'll not take you for granted ever again.
-
HYUNJIN: She taught me a lesson and now, I'm getting a second chance from her, I couldn't be more grateful [smiles]
-
Tonight turned out to be a good one for you, so is for Diego and Frida, they got the first green light in the retreat.
Yes, you feel a little jealous but not so much after knowing what happened to Andy and Edie, apparently, they broke up during their date. It's good to give her the space for now and you can ask her about it romantic.
Also, you don't want it to ruin your happiness. You just got back together with Hyunjin and you want to focus on that, you deserve to be happy about it after all you've been through.
"Want to shower together?" You ask him as you are both the last to use the dressing room.
The question seems to surprise him, Hyunjin just staring at you and blinking his eyes like a cartoon character.
You unzip your dress and take it off of you as you ask again, "I don't think it's against the rules, you know, we're just going to get naked in the shower together."
Hyunjin can't seem to decide which he should be focusing on, you taking off your dress in front of him or the shower invitation?
"IâI don't think it's against the rules, yeah," he stammers.
You wrap a towel around your naked body and then tie your hair up into a bun, "I'll get the shower ready."
This is how you're going to celebrate you getting back together with him but there's a hidden intention to it. You get all tingling just thinking of what you're going to do with him in the shower.
You don't wait for him to get in, he can see you through the glass door that you're in the shower with the water raining down on you.
A few minutes later, he finally gets inside the stall. He doesn't waste time putting his hands on you and placing kisses on your wet skin.
You turn your head to the side and ask, "Is it warm enough for you?"
He tightens his hold around you and kisses your shoulder, "A bit too hot, actually."
You know he's not talking about the water temperature from the way he keeps planting his lips on you. Unbeknownst to him, you're going to turn things around.
You turn around and expose yourself to him, letting him know what he's been missing these last few days when he screwed up on that date.
Hyunjin's eyes travel up and down your body for countless of time and his mouth is gaping open, but nothing comes out of it.
"How am I not blind after seeing this?" He asks in wonder with his eyes not straying away from your naked body, not even for a second.
You giggle and pull him close, placing his hands on each side of your waist while you put your hands around his neck. You look into his eyes, letting him see what you're thinking in your eyes.
Of course, he sees it and you see that he thinks of the same thing too but he fights himself to not put it into action.
"Let me wash your body for you, mmh?" You offer, not waiting for his answer, and grab the loofah from your toiletry bag.
You add a shower gel onto it and keep squeezing it until suds form bigger and bigger in your hand. You turn to face him again to lather it onto his body.
The whole time you're doing it, you maintain eye contact with him, slyly smiling whenever you get to the dangerous parts of his body.
"You missed a spot," he tells you.
"Yeah?"
"Mm-hmm," he bites his lower lip as he guides your hand down south to his left thigh.
Without intending to, you glance down and your eyes instantly fixed on his semi-hard, pink, and firm, inviting you to touch it. But you're not going to give in to temptations because you plan to tease him, not the other way around.
This is how he's going to pay for what he did, by letting him see and touch, but not letting him do more than that. You have the pleasure of seeing him suffer for not getting what he wants even though you're doing the same thing to yourself.
You both get under the shower to wash the suds, you run your hands on his body to clean him and when he least expects it, you push him until his back meets the tiled wall and cage him in between your arms.
You kiss his neck and have a taste of his wet skin on your tongue. You hear the moan spilled out of his mouth, it's beautiful, almost melodic.
You drag your lips to his ear and whisper, "We can't break any more rules."
Hyunjin is too high on your touches to even register what you said to him, you kiss his jaw next and grab his chin to keep his head still as you say again.
"We can't break any more rules."
"Uh-huh," he nods like a marionette doll, still not getting the meaning of your words.
You tease him more by leaning in close and cupping his jaw in your hand, "Baby..." you call him with a low, sultry voice.
He leans in while you're slowly backing away from him, "Yes?" He breathlessly asks.
"We can't break any more rules," you say for the third time.
He's finally getting it as he nods in agreement and looks defeated after. You console him with a kiss on his neck and hold him close, staying like that for a moment until it's time to finish the shower as the night is getting late.
By the time the two of you are tucked into the bed, he pulls you close and spoons you from behind. He gives you tickling kisses on the neck, making it hard for you to keep quiet since everyone else is already asleep.
"It's nice to have you on my bed again," he murmurs.
"Me too," you tell him.
-
YOU: As much as I enjoyed making him sweat, I have to admit that it feels good to share the bed with him again [smiles]
-
Last night was a lot, a lot of emotions and a lot of teasings but he's happy for both, he's happy because you're back with him and that's all that matters. Hyunjin is now living in paradise. He wakes up next to you and starts his day by kissing your cheek, he's living a new life.
"Oh, la la," he exclaims as he finds you in the bathroom.
You turn your head to find him in the doorway and watch you fixing your hair by the sink.
"I like what you did with your hair, babe," he praises you.
"Thank you," you mutter with a bashful smile.
While you're still busy with your hair, Hyunjin uses the chance to ogle at your body, admiring the curve of your body with that blue bikini that leaves so little to his imagination.
He bites his fist to help him suppress the need to touch you and it helps but only for a few minutes until he comes up behind you, hugging you from the back.
"You're so beautiful," he compliments again while looking at your reflection in the mirror.
"Thank you, baby," you brightly smile in response.
"I'm not just talking about the outside," he tells you, letting you know that your beauty goes beyond the skin.
You put your hands on his and look back at his face through the mirror.
"You're also beautiful inside," he continues, planting a sweet kiss on your temple after.
You turn your head to the side while keeping your hand curved around his neck, "That's so sweet of you!"
It's part of being the brand new Hyunjin, there'll be no more selfish, player-ish Hyunjin, there'll only be one Hyunjin, and that Hyunjin is committed to you.
That includes not breaking Lana's rules, he plans on following the process and making some real progress in this retreat so when it's time to gather in the cabana, he's not worried at all.
"I have a feeling she's in a good mood today," Hyunjin wildly guesses.
"I hope so," you hopefully say.
Everyone else seems to relax as well, maybe the watches do help them to stick to the rules so they'll get rewarded with a green light. Especially after Diego and Frida set the example last night.
"Hello, everyone," Lana starts with her casual greeting.
"Hello, Lana!" He says back with a grin.
"I'm always getting updated to promote your improvement. So, today I prepared an outside activity for you," Lana announces.
Hyunjin's guess turns out to be true and things couldn't get any better than this. Well, it could if Lana decides to send him and you on a date.
"However, only some of you are invited," Lana suddenly adds.
"What? Oh, come on, Lana!" Marie complaints.
It seems like everyone wants to go but then again, Lana is the one with power here. Hyunjin is fine with not being invited as long as you're not invited as well.
"Edie," Lana calls out the first name.
"Edouard, Saskia, Pablo..." she continues the list of names which he assumes as the ones invited to this mysterious outside activity.
And just like she heard Hyunjin's wish, Lana doesn't call his name but she calls out your name as the last one on the list.
"The five of you can leave the house now," she orders.
You look as puzzled as he is, awkwardly getting up from the sofa, "But why?"
He keeps holding your hand, reluctant to let you go.
"Come on, guys!" Pablo says, couldn't wait to leave the villa.
"I'll see you later," he warmly says to you even though he doesn't want you to go.
You bend down to kiss him on the cheek before leaving with the other four per Lana's order.
"I'm jealous. I want to go," Marie says with a frown.
"Here we are... on the sidelines," Andy sighs, looking bummed that he's not chosen.
Hyunjin is too busy guessing what the activity could be and why only some of them are invited. He doesn't want to think negatively but every thought that comes through his head is not a good one.
"The activity your fellow guests are going to is a party on a boat on the high seas," Lana finally reveals.
"I hope it rains," Vic bitterly says.
Everyone else laughs at that but Hyunjin is too nervous to at least pretend like he's okay with you going.
"What do you suppose could happen?" Lana asks.
Well, so many things could happen at a party and worse is this party takes place in the middle of the sea.
"A mess," Frida shortly answers.
"Do you trust your fellow guests?" Lana asks again.
Does Hyunjin trust you? He trusts you but it's the other people that he doesn't trust.
"I think we trust them," Diego doubtfully answers.
"I would like to propose a bet based on your trust in your fellow guests," Lana announces.
Everyone exchanging the same questioning look to each other, wondering what Lana is trying to pull this time.
"This is how it works: if they don't break any rules while they're on the boat, I will double the money on your prize fund," Lana explains.
The first part of it sounds great, it's an offer he can't refuse but he knows he's not going to like the next part.
"But if they break any rules, I will charge double the amount," Lana continues.
It's a go big or go home situation. Hyunjin is aware of the amount of money on the table and it doesn't take a gambler to know that he's not liking his odds.
"Let's do it. I trust them," Diego coyly says.
"They know better than to not break rules. We got the watches now," Frida backs him up.
"Do you accept this bet?" Lana asks.
Everyone turns quiet for a moment, thinking hard about whether to take the bet or not. Andy raises his hand to deliver his opinion.
"Every day we're holding grenades. Either we diffuse them or they explode. Let's diffuse this one," he says.
Hyunjin can't back that logic because it's a dangerous bet to take, it's like making a deal with the devil, and there's not going to be a win here.
But it works on the rest of the group as they decide to trust those who are going to the boat party and Hyunjin half-heartedly follows the majority by agreeing to it.
"We're in, Lana!" Remy says.
"The bet is on," Lana announces.
Hyunjin gets the feeling that everyone is going to regret it later but he could be wrong. Gosh! Let it be wrong.
-
HYUNJIN: I trust her. I don't think she's going to break any rules but I'm not sure about the others [sighs]
-
The staff doesn't even let anyone change or get ready for the outside activity, they lead everyone out of the villa and onto the boat.
Edie is practically bouncing on her feet, she looks wildly enthused to go while you're worrying about what the activity will be.
"How far are they going to take us?" Saskia asks with her hands steadily holding her hair down from the raging wind.
"Oh, God, they're not going to make us swim with sharks, right?" You loudly talk against the sound of the boat engine.
They're laughing thinking that you were joking, well, you're partly joking but another part of you fears that they're going to make you do things you don't want to do remembering that they successfully fooled you into thinking that it wasn't Too Hot To Handle.
The boat takes you further to the high seas and another boat comes into your line of sight, it gets bigger the closer you get.
You only realize then that you're riding a small boat compared to the one you're seeing, it's one big, luxurious yacht, almost like a floating house. Shielding your eyes from the sun, you notice that there are people on the upper deck, there are three of them and they're waving their hands your way.
"Wait, are we going to get on that?" You ask.
Instead of answering, Edie is squealing with her hands fisted into balls in front of her, can't contain her excitement anymore.
As the boat approaches the yacht, you can identify the three people on the yacht as two boys and one girl. It takes you about a minute to recognize one of them.
"Oh, my God!" You loudly gasp, and your hands fly to cover your mouth.
"What? What? What?" Edie asks, grabbing your arm as the boat shakes from hitting the other boat.
"Isn't that..." you point to the people looking down from the upper deck, "Isn't that Felix?"
Saskia gasps, not sure if she's recognizing him too or she's just excited to meet a new guy.
"Felix who?" Pablo confoundedly asks, unaware that he's just gone against his own words to never talk to you again.
"Felix from the first season," you answer.
But it's only when you board the yacht you can finally confirm what you see as two out of those three people lined up facing the five of you.
"Hello, everyone, welcome on board!" Felix welcomes everyone with a smile.
It's the Australian accent, the freckles that dusted his cheeks, the cute smile, the lean body but the deep voice is the dead giveaway that it's indeed him, Felix.
You didn't expect to be this starstruck to see him, he is so much more attractive in real life that you can't stop staring at him.
"I hope everyone is ready to have fun!" The girl says, having the same accent as Felix and you're sure you've seen her before, she must be one of the show's alumnus.
The group is howling in response and the boys especially. Edouard and Pablo, they're ecstatic at the sight of this attractive, petite girl with beautiful tan skin and big, brown eyes.
As you're about to ask the whereabouts of the third person, he appears from behind the crowd. At first, you don't recognize him as he's dressed as the captain with the shirt and the hat, and he's carrying a big bottle of champagne in one hand.
Then he throws the hat to Edie which she enthusiastically catches and puts on her head.
"Everyone, welcome to the boat party!" He announces and pops open the bottle, sending the wine spurting out of the bottle.
This can't be him but the body and the dark, curly hair... oh, God, it's him, you know it's him the second you see those dimples when he smiles, it's Chris from the third season and the one you have a crush on.
-
AVERY: We're back, baby!
CHRIS: Yes! We're back! [Claps]
FELIX: The good ones always come back! [Coyly shrugs]
-
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Shy Girl (2)
Hi guys!
This is the second part for Shy Girl, it was fun to write so I hope you will like it :)
It's longer that I thought tho. Sorry if there is some mistakes, Tumblr was a pain in my ass.
Enjoy!
TW : None
_____________________________________________________________
After the evening you met Alexia, you didnât stay for long in Barcelona. You are engaged for a film on a rather large scale since you play in an American production and for one of the greatest current directors. You are always very careful to study the profiles of people offering you roles, preferring not to play in a promising film rather than finding yourself with someone crooked.
You talked about it at one point during your exchanges with Alexia and she confided in you about all that the Spanish team has experienced in recent years because of the Federation. But thatâs just part of the different conversations youâve had over the last couple of weeks. After talking a few times on Instagram, Alexia asked for your phone number and you continued by messages and sometimes FaceTime.
Sometimes you had to change countries, but you always managed to find a time to exchange news. You must admit that when a break is taking between two takes, you hurry to check your phone to see if you have not received a message from Alexia. Little do you know that she does the same in training, undergoing the teasing of her teammates.
********
Alexia đ
Hey! When are you coming back to Barcelona again?
You
I'm coming on Friday
Why?
Alexia đ
If I give you tickets, would you like to watch me play?
You
Wait, you can play again?! đ±
Alexia đ
Just had the go from the medical staff đ
You
Oh god I'm so happy for you đ€
Of course I'll come, I'm happy you ask
Alexia đ
I'm happy too. I'll send you all the information soon đ
It's after this exchange of messages that you find yourself installed once again in the area reserved for families and VIPs, accompanied by your agent and definitely your best friend. Sofia puts her hand on your knee for the tenth time of the evening to prevent you from making it bounce in all directions. Alexia has informed you that she will not start the game, but will be in after the start of the second half.
Alexia is actually training since the return of the teams on the field and you feel the excitement running through the crowd as you see the captain treading the grass. However, itâs nothing against the clamor that resounds in the crowd when Alexia joins the rest of the team for the first time in many weeks. A big smile illuminates your face, similar to Alexiaâs before she focuses on the game.
The match turn to Barca's advantage and you stay after the match when the players start their lap at the end of the game. You spotted Alexiaâs mom and sister a few seats away from you but you didnât have the courage to go and greet them. You didnât agree on a program after the match, you didnât want to impose yourself too much and you imagined that Alexia would prefer to celebrate her return to the field with her teammates.
You wink at her when she comes to greet her family and you were about to get up to leave the stadium when she beckons you to approach. You hesitate for a split second but your best friend gently pushes you in the back to join her, which you do timidly.
"Hi" smiled Alexia, placing her hand on yours, which is on the metal of the railing. "Can you wait for me to catch up? I'll be quick"
Your skin is hot where she's touching you and you have to use all of yourself to stay focus on the conversation you're having.
"Donât you want to celebrate with your friends?" you ask while looking at her with your head tilted to the side.
"Maybe after" Alexia replies with some embarrassment that you have trouble understanding.
"Okay. Iâll wait for you then"
You smile and a big smile is displayed on Alexiaâs face, who promises once again not to take long before joining you. So you return to the same lobby as a few days ago, accompanied by your agent and best friend. Like the other day, she goes to get you a glass of champagne and you sit on two stools at the back of the room.
You find yourself blushing stupidly when you cross the look of Eli Putellas and you hurry to half hide behind your best friend who rolls her eyes seeing you do.
True to her promise, Alexia quickly appears in the room, stopping once again at her family who kisses her and exchanges a few words with her. Your eyes meet several times during their exchange and you quickly understand at Alexia's sign of head that she wants to introduce you.
"Donât forget to breathe, youâre going to pass out" Sofia teases you.
Itâs your turn to roll your eyes, but your heart beats a little too fast when the three Putellas arrive at your height. You havenât seen Alexia in person since you met her and with her wet hair and her bright smile, sheâs even more stunning than you remember. However, you try to ignore this by listening to Alexia who make the introductions between you four.
After the greetings and exchanges of rigour, you learn in passing that Alba has seen all of your films, Alba and Eli must leave since they both work the next day.
"Iâm glad you came" Alexia smiles after her family left and your best friend went to the bathroom.
"Iâm glad I came" you assure her by smiling too.
You silently look at each other for a few seconds and you bite your lip, trying to hold her gaze.
"Itâs weird to be in front of you after writing to you for two weeks" you finally confess timidly.
"It's weird for me too, but I'm really happy you came. It's mean a lot to me"
She takes your hand in her and when she sees your eyes going on your intertwined hands, she thinks that it's makes you uncomfortable. But when she try to take her hand back, you squeeze it, offering her a timid smile.
"Thanks for inviting me" you say, looking in her eyes.
She smiles and seems to relax, but Sofia come back at this moment and your hands are not longer in one other.
"So, what are you plan for the next days?" Alexia asks.
"I have some interviews while the film is being edited. After that I have to travel around to make the promotion of it, the film preview... And after all that I'm taking some holidays."
"Where are you going?"
"Barcelona probably" you smirk. "We have all we need here"
Alexia smirk back and keep talking with you for more time, until Mapi and some others girls come to look after Alexia. After greeting you, the blond talks to her friend.
"We're going to the restaurant Ale, you coming?"
"Do you want to come with us?" Alexia asks, turning for looking at you.
"I have to say no for her" Sofia intervenes "Early morning interview tomorrow"
You pout but Alexia smile while nodding, kissing your cheek before leaving.
"Well that went well" Sofia comments, smiling over her drink as you touch your cheek where Alexia's lips where seconds ago.
At the same time, Alexia was sighing before taking a last look at you above her shoulder.
"What is it?" Mapi asks her best friend.
"She's so beautiful. And cute. And sweet. I wish I could talk to her longer."
"So whipped already" Mapi scoffs, drawing a frown from her own girlfriend who asks her to leave Alexia alone.
********
Ale đ
How the interviews went?
You
It was great. A little bit tiring to have to answer always the same question but it was alright. How is your knee?
Ale đ
It's fine, like nothing happened đ
You
Thanks God. I'm happy for you really
Ale đ
Thanks đ
Canât believe Iâve only been back in the field for two weeks
Also two weeks since I last saw you
You
About that, I have something to ask you but maybe it's a little too much ïżœïżœ
Ale đ
Tell me?
You
As you know, we have the Preview for the film on Thursday in Barcelona
Ale đ
Yes?
You
I was wondering if you would like to come? And maybe being my +1? I know it can be weird because we don't really saw each other physically a lot, but I thought it could be fun to go there with you. We talked a lot already and I feel like I know you, at least a little bit. Don't feel any pressure anyway, I'll understand if you are busy with something else or if you don't want to come so don't worry
It's too much isn't it? đ„
You don't have to answer
Ale đ
đ€Ł
I would love to go with you â€ïž
********
You were happy, more than that actually, when Alexia says yes to you. But now you are a mess, looking at yourself in the mirror. You don't like your dress for tonight, you don't like your make up or the way your hair are. You always choose your clothes yourself, but tonight you feel like you only made bad choices.
You want to look great for Alexia, hopping that she doesn't regret to appear at your side for tonight. You warned her that there would be journalists and photographers, but it didnât seem to bother her. You explained to her from beginning to end the way these evenings go, from A to Z, without omitting the slightest detail. You don't want Alexia to be uncomfortable or embarrassed at any time of the evening.
"You're beautiful" Sofia smiles when she entered the room.
You shrug, still looking at you before sighing. She's your friend, of course she will tell you something like this. Before you can answer anything, someone is knocking at the door again and you let Sofia open the door.
"Hola Alexia. Great to see you here" she smiles, before leaving the room.
Alexiaâs presence electrifies you and you turn to face her. You let your eyes wrap around her appearance and you almost need to sit down. Sheâs amazing, obviously. Is there ever a time when that hasnât been the case? When your eyes stop on her face, you realize that she is smiling softly and you take a few steps in her direction to greet her properly. Youâve been talking non-stop for weeks now, but this is only the third time you can see her in real life.
Your arms naturally find their place around her neck when she takes you in her arms to greet you. Smiling, you extend your embrace, discreetly breathing her smell.
"I missed you" Alexia whispers in your ear
It makes you shiver and you canât hide the smile on your face.
"I missed you too" you smile softly as you step back a bit to look at her. "You are really beautiful"
"Speak for yourself" Alexia smiles back.
Neither of you has released the other when your eyes cross and you feel your breath become short when you see that her eyes descend on your lips. Itâs been a few days since youâve wondered what it would be like to kiss Alexia, even before your discussions take a little more intimate turn. A little flirty too. You discovered a funny Alexia that makes you appreciate her even more.
When Alexiaâs eyes go up on yours, looking for a form of consent, you just smile at her. No words are needed. Your heart accelerates in anticipation as she leans over you, but the door of the room suddenly opens when your lips are only a few millimeters apart.
"Y/N, we have to⊠Oh, sorry"
You refrain from insulting your colleague (and friend) on the screen when he enters the room suddenly, making you both jump. But your gaze must speak for you since he addresses you an excuse grimace. He looks at Alexia with curiosity, who now stands awkwardly two feets away from you.
"Alexia, this is John, my co-worker" you mumble. "John, this is Alexia"
"Great to finally meet you" John says with a smile, reaching his hand to Alexia before turning to you. "We have to go, the cars are here"
"We are coming"
He smiles again and leave. You turn yourself to Alexia, who was already looking at you.
"He never knocks on the door before entering?"
She looks annoyed and you bite your lower lip.
"I'm sorry"
"Don't be. It's not your fault."
Your eyes meet and she seems to relax a little. You offer her a hesitant hand, relieved to see that she doesn't hesitate for a second to take it.
"Are you ready to go?"
When Alexia nods, you take her with you to the exit the hotel where you prepared yourself. One of the cars supposed to take you to your destination is waiting for you and you let Alexia in before you.
"Thank you for agreeing to come with me. I imagine you must have your quota of ceremonies like this" you tell her while the car started.
"A little" confesses Alexia, shrugging her shoulders, before smiling. "But itâs for me, next time itâs you who will have to accompany me"
"With great pleasure"
A smile appears on your face and you feel your stomach doing a double-flip at the idea of spending extra time with Alexia. Enjoying the intimacy that the car offers you, you put your head on Alexiaâs shoulder which intertwines your fingers to put your hands on her lap.
"After that, you have no more obligations right?" asks Alexia after a few seconds of comfortable silence.
"No more for a whole month" you confirm.
You canât wait to have time for yourself, to sleep in the morning and just have nothing to do. To be able to stay in Barcelona, in your apartment and see your loved ones.
"Will you have time for me?" asked Alexia in a shy voice.
"Obviously" you smile softly as you look up at her.
"If I offered you a date, would you say yes?"
"I would say yes if you asked me, of course"
Your mischievous smile is seen by Alexia, who smiles back at you. This isn't exactly a officially request, but it goes in your way of operating from the beginning. Teasing, lightness and above all no anticipation of anything. No obligation, just the desire to spend time together. And other than by screen interposed for once.
When you arrive, she puts a kiss on your cheek.
"Time to shine, superstar"
You blush violently, which seems to amuse her a lot. The look of reproaches that you throw at her makes her smile, even if she addresses you a small sentence of apology.
"Sorry. But I find the fact that weâre both in the spotlight when weâre socially awkward rather amusing."
Sheâs absolutely right, and itâs probably one of your biggest commonalities. But it also allows you to better understand the other and you appreciate that very much.
A few minutes later, you are walking on the red carpet, trying to ignore the flashes of the photographers.
"Iâll have to take pictures" you explain to Alexia in a low voice while waiting for John to finish "Normally we take only a few before taking others with our partner, but we will avoid this point"
You cross Alexiaâs eyes and quickly realize that something seems to bother her. You ask her with your eyes and you are once again pleasantly surprised at the simplicity with which she seems to be able to confide in you.
"Donât you want to be seen with me?"
"Yes, of course. But youâŠ"
"I donât mind. On the contrary."
After looking in her eyes for a few seconds and realizing that she's telling you the truth, you nod with a shy smile. That wasnât the reason you invited her, after all, youâre not a couple. But youâre glad she wants to pose with you.
After taking some pictures alone, you invite her to join you by raising your hand to her. She takes it quietly, putting a hand in the hollow of your back. And you need all your concentration to stay focused on whatâs going on. You look at her and smile back at her, before looking again at the photographs.
When a few extra flashes have burned your retina, you take her hand again to take her with you in the comfort offered by the cinema.
You stop by several journalists to answer more questions, still without releasing Alexiaâs hand. She gives you a reassuring smile every time you turn in her direction and ask her how she feels.
After a while, you finally find your seats in one of the first rows of the cinema. At one point you received a drink and you put it on your armrest to turn towards Alexia.
"Are you okay? I know it can be a lot" you apologize, biting your lip.
"You had warned me. I'm alright, don't worry" gently reminds you a smiling Alexia.
You hum for any answer, letting yourself go against the back of your chair.
"And on top of that, a first date at the cinema isn't so unusual" smiles Alexia.
It makes you laugh and when you look at her, her eyes sparkle with malice. In spite of yourself, you think about the missed kiss in the hotel room and when you see Alexiaâs look slip on your lips, you know that she thinks about it too.
You really want to kiss her right now, but the director and the producer are suddenly in front of the crowd to thanks people to be here. You don't really listen to what they say, really aware of Alexia's fingers brushing against your arm.
During the film, you can't stop looking at her to see her reactions. You talked to her about the film, but you didn't give her all the details. You loved seeing her smile, laugh or frown.
"Internet is going crazy" Sofia informs you both when the film is over.
You and Alexia followed the others into the reception room where there are petits fours and countryside. You exchanged a few discussions with several people in the field, making sure to always include Alexia in one way or another. Most of your interlocutors obviously know her, she remains a world famous sportswoman.
"Why?" you ask Sofia naively, gently frowning.
"You show up with one of the best players in the world after being officially single for years. Try again" laughs Sofia rolling her eyes.
"Oh" you just blush slightly.
Alexia smirks at you, before taking a sip of her drink. The idea of being seen with Alexia doesn't bother you, you wouldn't have invited her if it had been the case. But youâll probably never understand peopleâs interest in other peopleâs privacy.
"Do you want to get some fresh air?" Alexia suggests pointing to the balcony with a nod.
You nod and follow her quietly. The fresh air from the outside is nice and the fact that the balcony overlooks an inner courtyard that doesn't show you to the rest of the world is just as nice.
"Are you having a good time?" you ask, looking closely at Alexia.
"Very good yes. It would have been difficult otherwise, I am in very good company after all"
You smile softly at her and give yourself control by finishing the glass that you held until now in your hand.
"Can I ask you something?" asked Alexia shortly afterwards.
"Of course" you answer by looking at her curiously.
"Sofia said you were officially single for years"
"Yes?"
"What does she mean by officially? Did you have someone hiding or something like that?"
"Oh... No, not at all. I was really focused on my career and it's always hard to manage a relationship when you are always everywhere in the world"
You shrug, but can't escape the inquisitive looks Alexia sends you.
"So... Hooks up?"
You widen your eyes before shaking your head negatively.
"No. It's not... I mean I'm not into this kind of things" you begin before stopping and looking at Alexia hesitantly "You're going to think I'm weird or something"
"I promise I'm not" Alexia smiles, grabbing your hand.
"I had someone but the distance was hard and we just fall apart. I haven't been with someone since" you mumble, blushing once again. "I... For me, sex and love are coming together"
Alexia is still smiling but you only have to look in her eyes to learn that she's not making fun of you.
"You are the sweetest girl in the world."
You roll your eyes and feel your body shiver when she put a strand of hair behind your ear. Taking advantage that you are alone, you press your face on her hand and gently kiss her wrist. You lost yourself in her eyes once again, studying at length each of Alexiaâs facial features. She leans again in your direction and her breath caresses your lips when you hear Johnâs voice sound behind you again.
"What?!" you snap, turning in his direction.
"I⊠uh. The producer was looking for you, he wanted to introduce you to a friend of his"
"Iâm coming" you sigh with annoyance
You donât listen to his stuttering excuses, preferring to take a deep breath to calm down. Why does the whole world seem determined to stop you from exchanging your first kiss with Alexia?
"I better go" you sigh softly as you turn towards the door.
But, before you can make the slightest step, you feel Alexiaâs hand grab your arm and draw you against her. Your eyes cross for a few seconds before her lips are on yours. Her lips blend perfectly with yours and you step on your toes to prolong the kiss. Your arms wrap around her neck and head, trying to be as close to her as possible.
Her hands slide on your back and her whole smell fills you. She's everywhere and you don't know if it's that or the lack of oxygen, but you feel yourself like floating.
"Now you can go if you want" Alexia mumble against your lips, as breathless as you are.
"I'm not sure if I want to" you admit, slightly blushing.
"Do you want to go home?"
Alexia only lets half a second pass before adding something to what she just said, as if she had just realized something.
"I mean⊠not going back, but you know⊠I mean, we didnât really spend time just physically. Well, physically, I mean in front of each other notâŠ"
"Alexia, stop" you smile softly, putting an end to Alexiaâs agony.
She seems to be grateful to you because she takes her breath while looking at you, although dancing nervously from one foot to the other.
"Sorry, it was weird" Alexia rolls her eyes.
"It reassures me a little, little things you were out of the socialy awkward category" you smile maliciously before adding "Let's go home."
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