#having someone read your fic even just for. readability can be helpful too..

[authorhjk1]

Just wanted to drop some of my personal thoughts on probably why the 3 fics worked so well or even just for fics in general to gain more attention

First of all i think what's really important would be the idols/pairings, like it or not, some idols are obviously much more "preferable" or even "readable" compared to others, so choosing the right idol while might not a guarantee for success, it can definetly help people to be interested in reading the fic at all in the first place based entirely on who are the idols involved. Of course this will create a new problem where a certain idols would just be written for too often and from there it will come down entirely on how each writer play out the story...

Which lead to the second point which is how you describe the characters if it matches the somewhat general idea of what people think an idol attitude would be, whether calm, naughty, bratty, subby, dom etc., and sometimes even down to what particular part of the idol can become the highlight, say if it's a busty idol then some additional focus towards her breasts will always be nice, or if the idol have nice lower body, playing more around the thighs/ass or even foot will also be plus especially for certain readers but in general highlighting their particular body could really add a plus in how you describe the idols and how the scenes are going between them.

Last but obviously just as, if not the most important would be the overall plot and flow, how you build things up, playing with the pacing in between the scenes and finally creating either an amazing climax or even if you want maybe give it some twist just for the sake of it, either way a good buildup and pacing can really help people to stay interested in the overall plot and on top of that, attention to detail, how you describe some stuff or scene in a much more detailed way can also make the whole experience become more fun to read.

On top of that, what i realized also is that some writers usually excels in particular length of story. Some are really good in short fics 1k-2k words ish fics, some excels in medium ones ranged from 3k-6k ish, some even better when it comes to a really long stories be 10k+ to 20k+ ish, so it might also help if you as a writer can find where is your strength, because at the end of the day, lenghty fics may not always equals a quality fic and a short sprinter does not always mean it is lack in quality too.

Anyways i must say this is all entirely based on my personal preferences on how i see things and how a certain fic can be much more interesting than others, but of course everyone have their own taste in story, pacing, fav idols, etc., so i guess take it with a pinch of doubt if that's the right expression

To close it all, just wanted to say again, thank you for working hard on your fics, and can't wait to see what you got in store in the future.

Stay healthy and take care

Thank you for such an explicit answer!

I would say that I agree with you pretty much on everything.

There are specific idols that are presented more often than others, which would mean one could write more of those. Wonyoung for example. Although I do have to say that it does kinda become a little repetitive. Because, just like you mentioned, the idol's personality plays a big role as well. I have read so many Wonyoung stories in the last months, and while all have different settings and plots, all do seem somewhat similar. Which is just rooted in Wonyoung's personality. The pretty, confident princess vibe.

I do like diversity though, when it comes to whom I'm reading about. That's why I'm also writing about so many different idols. I originally started writing, because I wasn't always able to find what I wanted to read. Take Dreamcatcher or Fromis_9 for example. Sure, there are a lot of fics about them too, but compared to Twice or Blackpink it's just a handful.

Although I've also realized that, although someone is highly appreciated, there isn't much to read about them. IU comes to mind. I was so surprised when so many readers liked it. Mainly because there wasn't much IU out there. So I would say it does depend a lot on the idol, at least when you talk about single fics.

With stories though, I think the "success" is more linked to the writer and the plot. How many people like what's going on? What kinks? And also how long is it? I honestly have a hard time to read a 30k words fic, but that's just me.

Adding to that, the writer's style is just as important. From what I have noticed, correct me if I'm wrong, is that I myself tend to describe actions and the scenes more than feelings. Just because I think, once you know exactly what's going on, you know what the person, or you, would feel in this situation. I've read differently oriented fics too, but I sometimes feel like the feelings disrupt the flow a little. And feelings are personal too, so readers sometimes have a hard time to emphasize.

I will stop for now though, because I think I've rambled on long enough. Thank you very much for this detailed explanation.

The next stuff I've planned is probably gonna be a little more experimental. For any IU fans: the next interlude is reserved for you after many requests for the stay in Italy.

The small series I have in mind is a request, and a great idea, from someone on Wattpad. It's quite kinky, but I hope you guys will enjoy it.

Stay healthy!

#ask #anon

[kookaburra1701]

Hi KBfriend <3

Excuse me marching in here unannounced. I decided to send some asks, and well, I thought that perhaps you might also like these questions. (Feel free to answer in your own time or ignore as your spoons allow. <3)

I know we love to talk about breaking the rules in writing and obviously, that not every piece of advice is one-size-fits all, but there is a lot to say about being able to speak with each other about what we have learned during our journey. I was wondering if you wouldn't share. (I also plan on poking some of the others to see what more we can shake out. The more the merrier, no?)

What is the most useful/helpful pieces of advice you ever received during your formal education in relation to writing?

Once you started to write, what was the most important thing that you learned about writing or its process?

Has your real life/job had any influence on your writing? If so, how?

What advice would you give to aspiring writers (be it fanfiction or original)?

Hi friend! Thank you for these asks. I will never turn down an opportunity to natter on about things, my inbox is always open!

It took me awhile to think of one, because the vast majority of my formal writing education was for nonfiction and the little bit of creative writing we were assigned was generally poetry and I HATED poetry as a kid. BUT. I distinctly remember one of my middle school English teacher saying that the worst thing our writing could be wasn't being "bad" (whether technically or narratively) The worst thing our writing could be was boring. I remember her saying she'd rather read 100 bad stories that were interesting, or at least where the author's passion shone through, than one "good" story where nothing interesting happened or the author clearly was just checking boxes about what should happen in a narrative arc. She would forget a good-but-boring story immediately while every terrible-but-interesting-and-passionate story was very unique and memorable. This leads into my answer for question 2...

When I started writing fanfic on FFN waaaaay back in 2002, I realized that some people were going to hate what I wrote no matter what - after all, I hated some perfectly fine fics for reasons that had nothing to do with their quality. The people who wanted to read the things I was writing would find me, and they did! I still have friends from way back then, even though we've all moved on to other fandoms and hobbies. So yeah, that was what I learned - fuck the haters, write EXACTLY what you want, your people will find you. It was heady stuff for someone who was always That Nerdy Weird Horse Girl in school.

Oh yeah. I was a paramedic for almost a decade. I'm now a biologist in a medical pathology department. I definitely use my knowledge of A&P and quite a bit of the trauma I witnessed and ended up being subjected to as part of the USian For Profit Healthcare system. Also, it wasn't ever my actual job (unless you count the under the table farm labor I did for a goat dairy in college) but growing up in a rural farming community and around animals has given me a big interest in the history of agriculture, and I love writing about people doing subsistence farming.

My advice builds off of my answers to 1 & 2. Don't put things in your story or write stories out of a sense of duty. Don't censor yourself because you think it might be "too much" or "turn away readers." Write (and draw and create) what you want with your whole chest. I have devoured fics that were barely readable due to atrocious grammar and spelling about characters I didn't even really like with a premise I thought was stupid and pointless because the author made it interesting, and a big part of making it interesting despite the shortcomings was how much the passion they had poured into it came through, and that they were clearly having a blast the entire time they were writing/channeling their id. This is related to something that kills me when I see it on fanfiction discussion communities especially about fics with explicit sexual content - people snickering about how obvious it is that "the author had their hands down their pants while writing this." MORE HANDS-DOWN-PANTS SMUT I SAY. NO SHAME. So I guess that's my advice. NO SHAME. Want to write the filthiest, most ✨problematic✨ smut ever? NO SHAME, WRITE THAT PORN. Want to tenderly describe every step of the main villain disemboweling a unicorn? NO SHAME, SHOW ME THAT SPARKLE BLOOD. Want to write yourself as the Maryiest Sue who ever Mary Sue'd having fun in the fictional world of your choice? NO SHAME, YOU ���GO👏GLEN👏COCO! Life is short, and late stage capitalism robs us of joy every chance it gets. Don't rob yourself of joy.

#kbs asks

[em-writes-stuff-sometimes]

Hey you ! Just wanted to let you know that I love & adore your writing very much. I am going through a really rough patch of my life and seeing you updating is something I am always looking forward to because reading your work is so fun & sexy haha ! I come back in the evening almost everyday to comfort- read the previous works of terms of endearment because I identify with reader on so many levels, seriously lol. Don’t wanna go in too much detail but my personal character development is so similar to hers 😅 apart from that I love your work because I am hopelessly crushing on Matt smith since I saw him in doctor who & head over heels for uncle daddy Daemon. You portray Daemon in such an authentic way if I had to choose someone to rewrite the script you would be the only one 🫶🏻Please keep going but don’t feel pressured - do it in your own timing ⏱️😊 also can’t wait for all the works you hopefully have planned for Babey & Daemon ❤️

Oh, yay! I'm so glad that you've been enjoying this work. I'm sorry that things haven't been going so well for you lately - I hope that things start to turn around for you soon. I'm really happy that you feel you can relate to Reader, as I have had a couple people question why she isn't so 'badass'; there's so many BAMF readers already, and I wanted to explore something for those who are maybe a little less inclined to extrovertist behaviours. I myself am quite shy and uncertain, so it's sorta been a weird way of unpacking that psychology for myself too.

I'm also really happy it's re-readable, lol, as so much of this has been written LIGHTNING quick with little editing. I think I was posting a chapter a day at one point? Wild. It seems overall a little easier to write plot, as I tend to overthink my language choices when I'm writing smut and it takes FOREVER.

I am greatly ashamed that it took me so long to see the light that is Matt Smith; he is fiiiiire in this role (heh, fire and blood, Targaryens, punny haha). He was very cute in Doctor Who, but this role made me go "YES, daddy, fuck me up." I'm thrilled that my characterisation of him is working! Always trying to find the line between sweet and fucked-up, because that is where the guy lives full-time. I have no plans to stop anytime soon, but annoyingly my whole family is home for a few more days and they get annoyed when I spend my time writing so I've not been able to do as much lately. After next Tuesday, they LEAVE me alone so I should be able to write a little faster!

As of right now, I have the following plans:

Pregnancy fic (post 'little slut')

Prequel series of little!Reader (Episodes 1-5-ish)

One-shot of claiming Cannibal (prequel to first fic)

One-shot compilation of other characters' perspectives of Reader/Daemon (set vaguely after 'sweet girl', potentially into 'little slut' and further)

Vague plans for another family-building fic (i.e. more births, Helaena's twins' birth, Viserys's gradual decline).

I WILL be tackling Episode 8 onwards to the Dance, but I'm wondering at this stage if I want to put a pause on the series until the second season comes out so that the story aligns character-wise with canon; I won't be making the same narrative choices, but it helps to know where Matt and Emma and the rest plan to take their characters so that I can do an interpretation of that. That way, the story feels thematically similar if not similar plot-wise. I don't know. Thoughts.

Thank you so much, anon. I do hope that this fic series can continue to help you out. I love that I can be there for you in some small way.

#fanfiction comments #terms of endearment thoughts

[sailorblossoms]

Happy Sunday! 

I’m updating my comphet haunted house fic daily (I called it The Same Old Story) and if everything goes well, it’ll be finished by next Sunday. I wasn’t sure what to share, so instead of sentences I’m gonna cheat and share a peek behind my process. When others share these types of posts, I find them very helpful, so... hopefully this will help someone!  

My thing with this fic was “I’ve written enough scenes to want to finish it” (I had 34 different docs, some with only have a couple of sentences written, because I like to write things as soon as they come to me without worrying what I'll do with it, and if I put it all out of order in the same doc it’s going to be so messy I’m never going to open that thing) and also “I don’t want to spend too much time on this and overthink it,” because then I wouldn’t write it at all. 

This was my solution (more under the cut) 

I used this instead of a refular outline – I figured it was the best way to quickly organize 34 dang docs without losing it. I know some use handmade cards for the same purpose, but for me it’s better to do things digitally, especially if I want to shift around bullet points (If I did this with handmade cards, I’d use a pencil and eraser, not a pen, or I would use sticky notes on a bigger surface so I can easily shift them around). Having everything where I can easily see it helps with “looking at the big picture” in terms of how it all comes together, and it’s super helpful with the time-loop and the repetition. It helps when I’m writing chapters out of order so I'm not getting lost: like if I finish chapter 9 and chapter 4 is only half-way done, I know that because I marked chapter 9 with a green circle here, and 4 with a yellow circle. (A necessary system for me because if I relay on my memory I’m just going to get lost)

It also helps with writing faster, because I’ve already thought about everything I wanted to happen while I was completing the squares. So I’d just look at this while writing whatever I haven’t written yet, and I write it just as it comes to me without caring much about mistakes or wording or the like. I might even write it as [this thing happens here and this character says this] and quickly move on, because it’s faster and so much easier to come back later to re-write. 

In terms of re-writing, I was like “this is an experiment, I don’t care if it’s good, I care if it’s done,” which takes off a lot of self-imposed pressure. When I wrote love song for a vampire I agonized over every damn word and that’s simply no way to live. Here, I didn’t let myself spend too much time on re-writing, wondering whether something could be phrased better or just done better. There’s always room for improvement etc etc but I limited this to “the idea is out and readable.” I read a chapter again when I’m about to publish, I quickly check if I want to make minor changes and then I let it go. 

In short: this is great for experimenting while keeping it manageable, for maybe speeding up and/or organizing the writing process if you need a lot of order to make an idea work, and if for some reason you need to easily see the general plot/outlines of all your chapters at the same time (this sounds very specific haha) (it might also be useful to quickly refresh an author's mind with long fics or fics that are being worked on over the period of months/years) (i didn't use word to make this but you could totally make it in word with the table tool)

tagging @ionlydrinkhotwater @hushed-chorus​ @basiltonbutliketheherb ​ @johnwgrey​ @erzbethluna​  @raenestee​ @carryonsimoncarryonbaz​ @chen-chen-chen-again-chen​ @bookish-bogwitch​  @ivelovedhimthroughworse​ @artsyunderstudy​ @whogaveyoupermission​ and whoever wants to join! 

#six sentence sunday

[inheartofwinter]

For the fic writer asks (copying and pasting from the post because I don't know how to do emojis)

💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

Hi, momo! Thank you for this ask! I was really excited when I saw this!

Here are my answers:

💫 I love lengthy, ranty comments about what people like about my fics, because they show that my fics are liked by someone. I also love short comments that are only consisted of a "love it". I will be grateful for comments that point out what I fucked up in my fics if they are constructive and polite. Honestly, as long as I can see that you care about my fics, whatever you write I will love them all. I once got a death threat (to be fair, I wrote OE and told my readers in the Author's notes to decide for themselves what would happen next so I kind of deserved it 🤣) and I still liked it. I'm generally just happy that someone spares their time reading and writing comments under my fics.

Having said that, I would prefer you include some word in the comments. I get confused about if someone really likes my fic or did they just clicked the wrong button when I see comments that are only emojis 😅

💞 Probably the characters. Like, the characters don't need to be great, perfect people—is there anyone perfect in real life?—but I like them to feel somewhat real and not just each other's copies or act in a way that totally contradicts their personality to move the plots (except if they have a reason to act that way, of course).

Plots are the most difficult part to write in a story and will be the greatest part if you succeed at writing it. However, there are fanfics whose word counts are only a few hundreds, and therefore, have few spaces for the plots. In those cases, I think the most important thing is the emotions. Make the characters lonely make them hurt, make them cry, make them terrifying, make them cruel, make them miserable, make them happy, make them silly,... whatever you want to do, as long as it makes the readers feel something. Too complicated plots sometimes don't work with too short fics, but fleshed-out, lively, real characters mostly do.

It will be different if it's not fanfictions, though. With fanfics, the readers already love the characters and want to read about them. But with original stories, you need to intrigue the readers first, and a good plots are often better in this case.

To be honest, I was going to say wording and pacing were the most important because they were what decided if the reading experience was comfortable (frankly, horrible writing can kill emotions). But then, I remember that I read fics whose writing was barely readable but had interesting plots, and fics which had bad writing and bad plots but the characters were so lovely I wanted to know what would happen to them next. So, yeah, even if you aren't good at wording, it's fine. Got someone to help you edit your fics if you want to, but even if you don't, someone will still like your fics if other aspects are good.

💋 Instead of want or don't want to, let's say I don't expect to hear back from the authors. There are fics with hundreds of comments, and as an author myself, I know how much mental strength it takes to reply to a comment (because I don't want to just spam "Thank you"), so I don't expect the authors to be able to reply to all the comments. I will be happy if I get a reply, though. At the very least, I will be sure that the authors know that I like their works.

#ask #writer writing ask game #OMG I got an ask

[wordsonamission]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks so much for tagging me in this, @acetonitril! Sorry for the delay, but I wanted to really think out my answers.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

12 currently! This is my first year actually posting fics and I'm happy with my progress.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

118,159! There's a chance I'll get another fic finished soon, too . . . And maybe I'll be able to sneak in something short and smutty before the end of the year.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

All I've published is Top Gun. I'm not going to be surprised if I end up writing soapghost for the COD games. Y'all have some superb writers and artists that keep drawing me in. Historically, I started some small 00Q and Destiel stuff back in ye olde golden days. There's a dramione fic from on my old computer from years back that was like 30k before I stopped.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Kissed By The Sun

Falling Into Place

A Safe Place to Land

Running on Empty

Spare

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! If someone was kind enough to make the effort to leave a comment, I want to make sure that they know I saw it and that I appreciate them for letting me know what they think. I don't generally reply the same day, but I try to reply within a couple of days. I love hearing what readers think and I hope that me engaging back only encourages more comments

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm I have a couple. Mission Report is a whole pile of angst just as a concept. It's short and sad all the way through imo. Spare ends on a really big cliffhanger which can be read as sad; a character is left in a really fragile medical state. Snow Day is so sweet but then the end is just a gut-punch. You could say that I like to temper fluff and steamy stuff with sadness and angst.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

If the ending isn't sad, it's usually pretty happy. Or at least hopeful. I think I'll give happiest ending award to A Cookie Conundrum. It's so silly and light, no angst.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

None that I've ever seen. But I'm still new and I write safe fics as far as subject and pairings.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yeah lol. I'm still getting used to writing it. What kind? Pretty standard MLM fic smut. I'd like to write harder edged stuff in the future, but right now it tends to be really loving stuff.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't. That's not something I'm super into as a reader or as a writer. Never say never - it'll only take the right combo to get me going I'm sure, but it hasn't happened yet.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I've seen. That is a worry of mine.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I'm still new and I don't see that Top Gun has a lot of fics that get translated (I could be very wrong and missing out)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No I haven't.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

All time ever favorite? Yeesh. Uhhhhh I'll cop out and say that I enjoy a similar dynamic to my favorites - they're highly competent in their field but often less confidant about romance, there's a degree of imbalance in the relationship (rank, age gap, experience, etc), and I'm an absolute sucker for a character that doesn't let anyone else emotionally close who lets That Guy in.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't think I'm going to finish any of the old fic I mentioned, like from years ago. If I pick up those fandoms and pairings again, I'll start over.

16. What are your writing strengths?

God I don't know. I consider myself someone with a good grasp on grammar and how things Should be written as far as that goes (please go ahead and point out all of my mistakes, I know they're everywhere) which helps with readability. Comments repeatedly point out that even my smut is very tender and emotional. I tend to write characters affirming each other and being very giving lovers. I'm sure that says nothing about me as a person. I really like to dig into missing scenes to expand the emotional complexity of the canon story.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Knowing when and how to end a story. One of those writing posts that go around here mentioned going back a couple of paragraphs when you get stuck, which has been so true for me. But endings are still so hard. Writing sex is still weird, too, and I can get stuck on a single scene for days. Coming up with titles is also so, so hard. Occasionally one will appear and I'll run with it, but usually it's one of the last things done before I post. I'm really not happy with the titles for my Ace Week fics.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Do you mean including characters speaking a different language and writing their dialogue in that language? A block of text in another language is rough on a reader and there's not really a good work around. Asterisks to the bottom of the page don't work on A03.

If I want a reader to know what a character is saying, I'd make note of the language change and use italics in dialogue but otherwise write normally. If the characters are in a situation where I DON'T want them or the reader to understand, then I'd type the language in italics.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I've written what I would now call fanfic off and on my whole life. When I was seven, I wrote a horribly indulgent self-insert fic of me joining the characters of one of my favorite book series (Pony Pals) for an adventure. In middle school, before the publication of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, I wrote my own version. I think I filled like two notebooks. I wonder if it's still around somewhere - I had some good ideas, some that were better than canon ended up imo

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Running on Empty! I loved it as one chapter but I really enjoy the whole story as it turned out in three. The only big thing I might change is tweaking the emotions Maverick feels after he and Ice finally get together. But that story flowed so well while writing and I really loved the world that I created with their families and especially Lisa and Jason for Slider. Plus I feel like that fic really addresses some of the trauma that Maverick went through and how he wasn't getting the support he needed in the OG movie.

That went long! Thanks again to @acetonitril for tagging me in this. I'm sure everyone else has already chimed in, but feel free to jump in if not. These are some great questions!

#wordsonamission writes

[rontra]

this ask/reply is long so im just putting it together as a textpost help me shark if you're out there

Anonymous asked: hi ok im super super sorry if this is bothering you but ive been meaning to ask it for like 6 months or something . i was introduced to your work via skin game and my brain latched to it ever since i read it. me and some other friends really enjoyed the fic even if it was a short read and i was wondering if youre comfortable sharing chapter 2 either publicly or privately? again im ultra mega sorry if this comes off as creepy or weird or something ive been stressing over it for liek 3 days since i didnt want to bother you :(

either way, love your work so much. your fanart introduced me to both arknights and rwby (though a friend kind of pushed me to actually start watching it lol) and theyre both really great series :) your work is a huge inspiration for me and my friend group and your writing is just insane /pos

(3rd paragraph omitted bc i cant priv reply and im excluding your offsite info even if its under a readme HFDBHJF)

hi shark!! ofc i remember you we are like soldiers side by side in the trenches of takano posting 🫡

so first of all thank you so much for following and enjoying my work 🥰 i'm always happy to help drag people into the arknights/rwby zone HEHEHE i'm glad you enjoy what i make!!! it means a lot to me 😊 thank you!!!

now. THE THING ABOUT skin game ch2. is that it's pretty rough. i had a look at it the last time something prompted me to think about the fic and it's not really presentable (i don't know if i even finished editing it back in ….. 6 years ago… oh god). it also doesn't have all of its art (which might be a blessing in disguise given the art it does have is …. 6 years old… oh god)

getting it to a state i consider readable would take a good chunk of work, which is why i put it off again after looking at it. it's almost 12 thousand words of … uhhh… shall we say… unnnnpolished material. i think i couldn't even share it privately because i would be embarrassed to show someone something so unfinished and janky. not to mention not having all of its art finished. so i got kind of stuck last time and just put it off again bc the amount of work it very obviously needed was like. "Christ OK Not Now" yknow…

it does bolster the spirit when i remember you and your friends. it means a lot to me that you care about it even after so long!!! i just have NO idea when i'm going to get around to editing something of that magnitude @_@ i was really a dummy about chapter lengths back then… HFDBHJGJMK

it's really kind of a shame too becahse chapter 1 and 2 together are sort of the introductory portion for our 2 primary characters. so it feels like only half of the intro is done right now. since ch1 detailed how kyrie ended up at that plaza meeting takano, ch2 would detail how takano ended up there, meeting kyrie. and then we would proceed into the future from there. as a renowned Takano Guy, obviously i was very interested in this, but for various reasons i never finished polishing it and drawing the art…

ch2 also features ikuko so you KNOW its dear to me

overall being like 5-6 yrs old theres a disconnect where i don't feel like ch2 right now is achieving what it should, and i see a lot of concrete problems with concrete solutions, but it's an editing of such Magnitude that it keeps being pushed back in favor of other stuff. oh, ephemeral soul…

some of the art i did get done for it is pretty cute though, like these baby miyos;

so that's pretty good, but i didnt FINISH drawing the art, ARGHH

it is really hard to say. bc when i KNOW there's people out there who remember it and care about it, that does motivate me to return to it. but it has a lot of stuff that needs doing, and is a very old project, so it's unclear to me right now when it would receive the attention it desperately needs before it can be shown to other people... i super can't in clear conscience accept anything like payment/etc for that kind of vague half-promise either, although i appreciate the thought xD

i'm sorry it's such an inconclusive answer, but i am sort of an inconclusive guy when it comes to projects... i jump around a lot as i'm sure you've observed in your time following me 😭 it's important to me to have that freedom, but i do care about SG too, so we just sort of have to see if i can surmount the magnitude of the work i accidentally set up for myself half a decade ago (*turning into stone*)

but it makes me smile when i remember you're out there thinking about this weird little AU. so, thanks. 😌 a soul still burns...

.

and then after all that CH3 was going to have more of best girl 🥺.....

WARGH <- BEARER OF THE CURSE

[evelhak]

Since you were so gracious to give me some asks, I shall do the same! Artists asks: 2, 7, 19, 26, and also 30. ^__^

Always happy to hear from you and to know more about you!

2. Is it easier to draw someone facing left or right (or forward even)?

I think it's the easiest to draw someone facing left. That one usually takes the least amount of redrawing.

7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate

Pottery is something I feel very drawn to, as well as glass blowing. I don't have the physical requirements to become good at it but I'd like to try some time.

19. Favourite inanimate object to draw

I'm stuck between flowers and books. I'm so basic.

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended?

Wow, what a question. Nothing came to mind from the art I have on Tumblr, so I had to look for something I haven't posted.

Someone interpreted this as your typical fantasy character with fire powers. It's SO far from that, actually. The fire is symbolic, because this character plays with fire metaphorically, and because what she's holding in her hands can symbolically be burning for better or worse, and also because she is blinded by magic in the story, although it's more the lack of it than the thing itself, and because she's seeing what she wants to see.

I guess it's not that "wild", but I couldn't think of anything else.

30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated?

I'm going to have to go with writing for this one, because sometimes I can't believe how much more interaction smut fics get on AO3 than long fics like mine that are basically like another season of the story (with a different focus or angle, but still).

I get that another reason why I'm never going to get that many readers is because I'm pretty much never posting at the height of a fandom's interest, because I need to mull things over for months after the series ends, and I never create anything while the original story is incomplete, so I'm usually only starting when the peak interest for a series is already going down, and my fan works tend to require a bit more of an attention span than the average fan seems to have for one thing. Even my She-Ra comics were a bit late for the fandom, although they are of a much more readable length than my fics, so I assume that's why they got relatively popular. I guess comic form is easier to digest for a lot of people, too.

Anyway, I think if I have to pick the fics I'm the saddest that many people haven't read them, they are my retellings.

I'm really proud of the way I basically paraphrased the whole Into The Woods to tell a KnB story! I don't understand how most people's brain doesn't light up with all the good hormones from wordplay like this! I was SO high, writing this.

I'm also really fond of this one, which was inspired by the Romance of Silence. Where are all the people who love intertextuality, hiding??

Yes, I understand another reason why people aren't into these stories is that they are so niche. That's always going to be my curse too, because I love the interaction of specific and general, but I love to go about it by combining things that are niche and don't usually go together. Not because they are niche or rarely combined, it just happens, I can't help but be drawn to specific concepts in a specific thing and then finding another equally specific thing with compatible concepts that send me right into hyperfocus, and I can't leave them untouched, I have to create something new from the interaction of those separate elements, because the abstract connections just sing to me. But I guess there's always the hope that when someone whose niche my stories perfectly fit into, finds them, then they are going to really love them. And honestly, I'd rather have one person to whom they are the perfect fit, than a hundred who thought they were "okay".

Also, I know these stories don't work very well unless you read the whole fic series, though I guess Kuroko's Fairytale makes more sense, and I tried to frame it like you could read it as a standalone, since I think technically you can, but you're probably still going to be very confused at some parts.

#art #knb #TOTverse #into the woods #romance of silence

[ichoosefictionalthoughts]

hurt/comfort ron fic? :)

AHHH thank you for the request. I haven't proof read it as I wanted to get it out as fast as possible for you! Warnings - overworking yourself, food related stuff as reader forgets to eat, a breakup and maybe a bit ooc ron since I haven't written for him in years. I hope you enjoy - please tell me what you think of it! Tunnelvision - Ron Weasley x Reader (hurt/comfort + word count 695)

'OWLs are next week. I am going to fail. OWLs are next week. I am going to fail.' A constant look of that for you don't know how long. Hermoine has came and went several times trying to get you into your dormroom even if its just to get you away from your desk, but you can't leave. Not yet. If you leave now you wont be prepared and you'll fail and you won't be able to do anything once you leave school and -

A slam on the desk makes you jump. You look up to see a pair of blue eyes glaring at you under a curtain of red. "Ron, you are in a library you can't just-" He cuts you off. "I can't just what? make sure my friend eats? You haven't left your chair in eight hours… I'm worried about you."

You look at the clock - you didn't realise time had moved that fast. It also explains your splitting headache since you haven't even left to go get water. Normally your boyfriend, well now ex, used to study with you and you would take breaks together. But you broke up last week. 'Maybe thats why I have been focusing on the exams more, that way I don't need to see him.' The realisation must be readable on your features as Ron starts to close your books and take them into his arms, making sure you can't grab them and sneak off somewhere else. Your stomach rumbles and when you go to stand you feel rather dizzy and tired, like you wanna sleep forever.

"Come with me and get something to eat, and don't lie to me by saying you aren't hungry. God I sound like my mother." He walks and you follow, leading you into the hall.

You both sit next to each other and start eating. Ron eats as if someone is going to steal it from him, most likely a habit he picked up from being younger than his brothers in a busy house. But you pick at your food, you feel more sick than hungry now that you have left it so long without having anything to eat. Ron notices and actually stops eating to your surprise. "Y/N, eat."

"I am full - do you want the rest of mine?"

He just stares at you with a straight face. "Your lies used to be more believeable, I just need you to eat something so you have enough energy to pass your OWLs."

'he is right i suppose i dont remember the last time i ate, i have been too focused on my exams to even notice when its meal times'

Once you start eating you actually realise how hungry you were, you eat as much as you feel you can and start to feel like you could just fall asleep right there and then. Ron looks at you, fork full of peas, and sees how tired you actually look. "C'mon lets go to the common room."

He takes you up all the stairs with your head leant against him. You barely notice when you end up on the couch with the fire on and blankets wrapped around you. You look up from your comfy couch nest to see Ron coming towards you with a glass of water. You move your legs to let him sit by them. As he's setting down the glass on a nearby coffee table he starts. "You know, asking for help doesn't make you weak you know? I am here for you, we all are. Hell I needed to ask you to kill that spider last week." He shivers at the thought of its many legs. "I know you are worried about exams but you're the smartest person I know, just don't tell Hermoine." That makes you laugh. "We can stay here for as long as you want, we don't have to talk if you don't want to. But I am here for you no matter what okay?" He stayed with you until you fell asleep that night, still on the couch, and it was the best nights sleep you may have had in weeks.

#ron weasley #ron weasley x reader #ron wealsey x y/n #ron weasley imagine #ron weasley fanfiction #ron weasley comfort #ron weasley hurt #i choose fictional thoughts

[exonerin]

✨✨✨✨🫱Care to share🫲✨✨✨✨

The message was sent to you because someone loved your writing and stories. ❤️

▪️What are your writing suggestions for newcomers, or what would you have liked to know when you first started?

▪️How do you write different personalities and perspectives? Could you explain how you came up with the manner you written your favorite or any character?

▪️What do you do when you have writer's block?

▪️How do you come up with new ideas and develop them?

▪️Any messages for your readers or fellow writers?

You are welcome to answer if you have the time and desire, or you can simply respond to the questions that come to mind.

💐Thank you for your work as a writer and as a member of this fandom!💐

Thank you for the questions. They were delightful to answer.

What are your writing suggestions for newcomers, or what would you have liked to know when you first started?

Have fun, but you have to sit down and write. And then, you have sit down and edit. Turn that first draft into a readable product. Which you edit again. And proofread. Ideally, you write a fic for which this entire process is fun.

So, have fun and be patient, I suppose?

How do you write different personalities and perspectives? Could you explain how you came up with the manner you written your favorite or any character?

Yeah... That's a struggle. I consider this a direct hit to the greatest insecurity I have about my fics (aside from the English). And I can't look too closely at my fics or I'll rip my Obi-Wan apart. My Kylo Ren, too. I never get them right. But hey, practice makes perfect, though re-watching/re-reading the source material helps.

Sometimes, it's easier. When Hux's in control, he's angry, arrogant, confident. However, when he loses control, he's terrified. Suddenly, he's more like a hurt animal, and it makes him unreliable, even quicker to anger, and deeply insecure. If Ren's around, Hux does not feel in control of the situation ever, and I think that's fascinating.

I'm also intrigued by how much of Hux's arrogant front is deceptive. (I can write an essay on the battle of Krayt and its aftermath, but I'll spare you that. Instead, I'm working on a hanahaki fic in the background).

Anakin's similar. It's just easier to decipher and identify what he feels, why he feels it, and how he'll react.

Still, though, dialogue is tough.

What do you do when you have writer's block?

You go back to the start of the story, and you read until you find the moment your plot starts sprawling or your dialogue turns ridiculous. You delete everything after that point (or you put it in a different file, so you can see that your deleted segments are longer than the finished product). Then, you try again.

Sometimes, that means deleting 20k words (Unconditional Surrender). Or scrapping the project altogether (40k, Bringing Skywalker Home). Or you write the same segment five times over (Speak No Evil).

Surprisingly, this has a 100% success rate, and the final product is always better than what you initially wrote.

How do you come up with new ideas and develop them?

This is fun. That's all.

I see something, and I think, that would be fun to inflict on these characters I love, and then I think about what happens next.

You just continue writing, wondering how the characters would react until you reach the end, I suppose.

Any messages for your readers or fellow writers?

Hello there? I'm notoriously bad at talking to people. So, I'll just stick to the monologues if you don't mind.

[fluff-0ff]

Writing tips I’m learning by reading AO3 fics:

Take all your recommendations when you’re a beta-reader and apply it to your own goddamn writing. Seriously, it’s a great opportunity to think critically about the hows of writing.

Simplify and combine sentences for readability.

Combine side characters so there’s fewer people for the readers to keep track of.

There’s a difference between physical reactions and body language.

Show character attitudes toward other characters by their actions, not declarations.

Scene endings can tie back to the beginning

Can insert details of characters’ PAST experiences as characters’ memories or sudden reminders throughout later scenes to show character development including refinement of their beliefs.

Wherever you can easily insert “character feels…” should be translated into a physical reaction or sensation. I.e. What does anxiety feel like?

If there’s onlookers in a scene, list how the main character can observe them (like, can they hear the murmurs? See them leaning over to whisper to each other? Smell their B.O.??)

Take the time after drafting to identify the main theme or message of the fic, then go back and tweak things to highlight it.

Pick whatever obstacle the main character is facing, then create a FOIL character of their attitude/approach to it. It has a phenomenal impact.

After drafting, go in and insert little blips that show the MC’s personality. Like, preferences and peeves, snarkiness, etc. This especially livens up internal monologues.

You can smooth out transitions from one scene to another by drilling down into the character’s reaction to the change.

Ask yourself, what does [ ] look like? Like, in one fic I just read, it was what does desire between two characters who are competent but have opposing loyalties, look like? In this case it was them still being professional toward each other, just a little less so.

How do characters think other characters think of them?

Having a character act OUT of character with someone else is very telling about how they feel about them.

Have an internal monologue end/culminate in a line that sums it up in a sentence. It rocks the reader’s world.

All characters have some element of prejudices, insecurities, peeves, blind spots, destructive tendencies, hypocrisy. (A.K.A. The hero ain’t perfect even if the fic doesn’t dwell on their flaws.)

Construct your world’s history BEFORE the actions of the story, even before the trigger of the story’s circumstances.

Useful exercise is how would this character retell the events that happened? (Aka, how do they want others to think of them?)

Side characters can have their own personal histories too.

Great question to ask! What does your character want for themselves? How would they imagine their happy ending?

If their relationship were two people holding hands, what would that look like? (I.e. Does one have a white-knuckles grip while the other is losing feeling in their hand?)

Varying tones between (and even within) scenes helps keep your readers engaged. It can act like a palate cleanser if the character is in the depths of despair too.

Suddenly having detailed descriptions emphasizes the character’s internal focus, such as a moment of shock or the split second when they realize something is about to happen but they’re too slow to respond, or the adrenaline of combat.

#ao3 stuff #ao3 reader #writing advice #writing #notes for myself

[queenangst]

fic writers: the harder your fic is to read, the less likely i’m going to read it.

#and im really sorry for new young or like. non english writers bc learning how to write [in english] is hard #but there are just some little things that if you didnt do #would make things easier for your readers #you just want people to be able to easily read the fic and not feel taken out of it at any point #some examples include: #dialogue punctuation #'color'-ette which has several problems and tho its not always gonna turn me off gets annoying #not starting new paragraphs w new speakers and or in general #fancy texts such as zalgo text not used in moderation #and so on #like it KILLS me because fics will sound really good but i cant make it past 3 paragraphs reading-wise #ely talks #writing #ok to rb #having someone read your fic even just for. readability can be helpful too..

[chateautae]

maybe i do | kth. I

➵ summary :  maybe you love each other, maybe you don’t. when a deal between your fathers leaves you forcefully wedding kim taehyung, arguably seoul’s most powerful CEO, you’re prepared for a loveless marriage of eternal regret and unhappiness. but maybe, it doesn’t turn out that way after all.

↳  part of the high-class series!

➵ pairing : taehyung x reader

➵ genre :  arranged marriage!au, ceo!tae, s2l!au, eventual smut, fluff, angst 

➵ rating : 18+

➵ word count : 11k

➵ warnings : swearing, alcohol consumption, anxiety, lots of feels about marriage, a stupid ex (reader’s), mentions of bad sexual experiences with ex (there’s consent, just bad sex that makes the reader feel shitty), does ceo tae count as a warning? 

➵ a/n: hello my first fic of my favourite trope arranged marriage, AND with kim taehyung?? yes pls !! this will be a series and I’ll be actively working on it so you don’t have to wait too long for chapters, i hope you can follow this series with me <33

chapter one : “my forever’s falling down”  

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“Another one, Father? I thought I told you my secretary would be handling marriage profiles from now on. Stop concerning yourself with who I marry.” 

“But I do, son. Trust me, I know this girl, she’s the daughter of a trusted friend and I think she’s a good match.” 

“Father, everyone you choose for me I dislike and it’s distracting me from my work. I don’t need this right now.” 

“She’s different, Taehyung. I personally know her and I’m certain you won’t say no.” 

“And why is that?” 

“There’s something about her you won’t refuse, son, you’ll notice it when you meet her.” 

“I don’t want to meet her, Father. Like I said, I need to work.” 

“I just knew you’d act this way. Want to know something, son? I’ve made her part of a business deal, you can’t back out of this.”

“What? You made her part of a business deal?! Why would you-”

“Because you wouldn’t have given her a chance otherwise, you haven’t been giving anyone a chance since I’ve been setting up potential partners for you and I’m sick of it. You said you were open to an arranged marriage, where’s that attitude now?”

“Because, Father, I have a company to run and that’s-”

“No. I will not allow you to reduce your life to just this company. There are far more enjoyable things in life than a business.”

“But Father-”

“No, Taehyung. One thing you need to learn is balance. If you don’t give anyone or anything a chance you will live a lonely life behind your desk. Even in this cutthroat world of business where you can lose money or be betrayed by anyone at any moment, the most painful thing to suffer is loneliness, and I won’t let you live in this world alone.”

“Dad-”

“You will meet this girl, Taehyung, end of discussion.” 

“Dad! I told you I want nothing to do with your company, how could you let me get dragged into this?!” 

“Y/N-ie, I know you value the life you have without any of my help, but let me help just this once, especially with finding a husband. I’m being offered the deal of a lifetime and I can’t refuse, he just happens to be part of it. I need this for the company, please.”

“But Dad, I don’t even know him. And if he’s the CEO of some rich company he’s probably an asshole, I’m not doing this.” 

“Y/N-ie, trust me, I know his son. He’s a sincere, hard-working man, I promise.”

“Yeah, right. Even if that’s the case, I still don’t know him, let alone love him, Dad. How can you make me marry someone I don’t love?”

“Because you can learn to love him. There are no rules concerning the way two people should fall in love, love doesn’t always need to come first.”

“But Dad-”

“My daughter, I have not asked you for many things in my life, but this is one thing I must ask of you. Please, just meet him, don’t say no without even trying.”

“Dad, I don’t know-”

“Please, Y.N, do it for me. If not for the company or money, please do it for me.”

And here you were, fidgeting with the tips of your nails, tuning in and out of the present world and overthinking every aspect of your life that somehow lead you to this moment. Sitting on a Leather Italia couch in what was described to be Mr. Kim’s study; listening to your father’s incessant, albeit wholesome chatter next to you with your future in-laws across. 

And next to them was their suave, unreadable son sitting in a relaxed manner, flipping his attention between your fathers’ conversation and anything else in the room.

You on the other hand, were utterly high strung due to the fact that your father failed to mention your future fiancé’s identity until 30 minutes before arriving here, having done a quick search in the car to unveil who he exactly was.

And that’s when it hit you. You weren’t marrying just anyone, you were getting married to Kim Taehyung. The infamous CEO of Kim Enterprises—Korea’s largest software development and manufacturing company, rivaling to be one of the largest in the world. He was part of Seoul’s most prestigious circle of businessmen, having made multiple Forbes international lists of Most Successful, Youngest, Richest, and is even one of Korea’s most eligible bachelors, not just Seoul.

If this wasn’t already taking you out, then it was definitely the fact that his photos through a measly Google search did him absolutely, utterly and completely no justice. They simply could never capture the truth of just how handsome Kim Taehyung was in real life. You couldn’t deny it, he wasn’t just good-looking, he was stunning, gorgeous, seemed as though God had created the universe, heaven and hell in 6 days and left the 7th just to create him. 

He was like a work of art, worthy of being placed in the finest of museums and left untouched, unsodden by the ugliness of humanity. It made you feel extremely inferior to him in an instant. It was sickening, he was sickening, intoxicating, and quite frankly, intimidating.

It was his look, his undivided stare when he eventually settled his sight on you. It didn’t matter his dark hair that landed and perfectly curled above his eyes, the way he occasionally licked his plush lips or how his long, tall legs spread out before him, it was his look that made you want to turn tail and run.  

It seemed to reach into your soul, peer straight through whatever façade, walls or defense mechanisms you could spend years building only to have his simple look tear it down in minutes. He was alluring, captivating, left you wanting to cower into whatever hole you could dig yourself into or discover all the secrets he hid behind those enchanting eyes.

Kim Taehyung was many things you couldn’t quite wrap your head around, though you assessed your priorities and decided they didn’t just include him, but mainly the significance of the current meeting taking place right now. 

It wasn’t a mere one-time business deal to discuss a project, it was a meeting that entailed the partnership of both your family companies and would define the next however many years of your life. More specifically, spending it with the exact same man that looked at you without a single readable expression on his face. 

You distracted yourself by trying to observe as many useless things as you could, flitting around the room many times before suddenly glancing at Taehyung’s index finger coming up to rest against his lips.

You zeroed your vision in more. 

Is that a cut on his finger?

“Jae-in, of course! This is just as important to me as it is to you, your son is a remarkable CEO, and I’m sure he’ll make an amazing husband.” 

“Aish, Namhyun, you flatter me too much. My son may be handsome, though your daughter is even more beautiful. I’m very sure she will make a wonderful wife.”

“Yes, Namhyun, your daughter is absolutely gorgeous! Just as gorgeous as her mother. I know she wasn’t able to make it, though may I ask where your wife is tonight?” 

“Ah, unfortunately, she’s out of the country. Though I was hoping my presence would be enough to fill in for her, am I doing a bad job?” 

Laughter erupted from the parents in the room, meanwhile, Taehyung couldn’t help but notice the way you immediately winced at the mention of your mother. Something he definitely wouldn’t miss with the way he found himself examining your every move. 

It was habitual to him, something born out of his roots in business, only for the purpose of calculating and reading people like an open book. 

He knew you’d also become victim to that habit, though oddly enough, he found himself quite interested in observing you. He had already figured you out; you hated business, there was a clear disconnection between yourself and your father’s company and you reeked of a sense of independence that funnily contradicted the antsy way you bounced your leg. 

Your way of speech, however, mannerisms, gestures, your look; it was all professional enough you clearly have some sort of background in business. You seemed like an heiress to Taehyung, which you were, though you oddly had no interest in business?   

All these details piqued his interest, curious of just who you exactly were, but he was mainly intrigued by the mysterious claim his father made upon mentioning you for the first time. 

‘There’s something about her you won’t refuse.’

That had raked Taehyung’s brain consistently for the past hour now, crossing his legs loosely and his arms folded over his chest, contemplating over and over again as he looked at you, what’s so damn special about her? 

‘You’ll notice it when you meet her,’ the words rang in his ears.

That was the driving force behind his calculation, observation, near inability to take his eyes off of you as he learned new things nearly every minute and led him closer to understanding his father.  

He could tell you were an anxious person, though hid it behind a persona of false confidence. You had a tendency to stick close to your father despite observing you don’t rely on him for much of anything, even less your mother. The softness behind your every movement despite being from a business background where you should be harsh, rigid, rough around the edges, and yet you seemed entirely different.

Taehyung then realized how inherently dissimilar you were to many of the other women he met. They were all relatively of the same cut and look. Cold, sharp, cunning. All women of pure business; daughters, granddaughters or straight CEOs of wealthy companies, simply interested in marriage as a deal or an advantage rather than a commitment. 

And there was absolutely nothing wrong with that. Taehyung was a man of business himself, married to his work, his home behind a desk and the company the only thought occupying his mind 24/7.

But with you, you were interesting, unlike the others and it made him curious.

Taehyung also couldn’t help but notice you were...pretty. You weren’t too overly sexy nor too innocent, you were pretty. There was an elegance to your looks, features like your hair and eyes complementing you as a whole, and he couldn’t miss that you felt oddly...warm.

Taehyung found himself beginning to understand his father’s original viewpoint, considering the possibility he could’ve been correct. 

You just seemed different. 

“Ah, that seems to be everything. Exact details about the wedding have already been put in place by us.”

“Yes! We’ve been waiting for our TaeTae to get married for so long. We’ve had plans for months now and we can finally move forward with them! You and Y/N don’t need to worry about anything!” 

“Mom, did you really just call me that in front of my future fiancé?” 

“Oh, let it go, son. It won't be long before she calls you that, too!” 

Taehyung could only playfully roll his eyes at his overly excited mother, you scrunching your nose at the embarrassment.

“That’s incredibly generous of you, Mr. and Mrs. Kim, though my conscience is not one to let such things go. My family should contribute to the wedding in some way. Y/N and I would be happy to do so.”

“Why don’t we discuss that outside? I believe we should give the future couple some time alone, shall we?” 

You and Taehyung exchanged a quick look before standing up and respectively addressing either’s parents, Taehyung shutting the door behind them once they exited and having turned to look at you, an awkward silence piercing the air. 

There it was again, his look. It was irrefutably the one reason you avoided eye contact with him, you felt he would swallow you up if you shared even 5 seconds between each other.

“So...” Taehyung suddenly broke the ice, eyeing you.

“So...” 

“Marriage, huh?” 

“Yeah, marriage. Never done that one before.” If there wasn’t a time you vehemently hated yourself, then it was undoubtedly now. You internally facepalmed at your dumb comment, adding a laugh at the end in embarrassment only to look away. 

“Uh..yeah.” Taehyung laughed awkwardly. “Me neither, if you didn’t already know.” He tucked his hands into his pockets and looked away, you fidgeting by the couches everyone previously occupied. 

A beat of silence passed as you both exchanged looks between objects in the room and each other, either of you pursing your lips or blowing light raspberries to cut the awkwardness. 

“I wanted to ask you something.” 

“Hm?” You turned towards him, lips just a pout as your doe-eyes awaited him. 

Taehyung didn’t miss that at all. 

“Um, your mother. I apologize if this is intrusive of me, though I couldn’t help but notice I’ve never actually met her. May I ask where she is?” 

You let out a dry chuckle before answering, another detail that didn’t slip Taehyung’s attention. “Trust me, Taehyung, one thing you’ll never have to worry about during this entire ordeal is my mother. She should be the last thing on your mind.” You assured him with what he could tell was your fakest smile, distracting him from the realization you’d said his name for the first time.

“Are you sure? I’ll be meeting her at the wedding so-”

“You won’t. I don’t think you will. Even if she does make it, it takes very little to impress her, just be yourself and she’ll love you.” You stated with a sense of finality, as though the topic should be dropped. 

“Be myself? I’m one of the best businessmen in Korea. It’s my job to get people to like me, easy stuff.” He casually gloated. 

“You don’t only have to be a businessman to do that,” you paused and looked at him, “you can just be Kim Taehyung, too.” You spoke nonchalantly, eyes lingering with his for longer than 5 seconds and he, in fact, had not swallowed you yet. 

Taehyung instantly furrowed his eyebrows, taken aback as if your suggestion was something outlandish, absurd, maybe even offending.

Nobody has ever said such a thing to him, not throughout the entirety of his life. 

Taehyung tried his best to recover, searching for another topic of conversation before he was cut off by your rather soft voice, he noticed. 

“Oh, I wanted to give you this.” You stepped towards him, reaching into your purse and retrieving something Taehyung couldn’t quite see. You strided over and extended your hand, Taehyung finding himself even more confused.

“A bandage?” 

“Mhm. For the cut on your finger. You should probably clean it and apply something before putting this on.” You stated nonchalantly once again, offering him a small smile whilst holding out the bandage. 

“Uh...” Taehyung started but couldn’t complete his sentence, lost on how you even observed something as small as his cut and spoke of treating it like it was an actual injury.  

After his struggle to form a sentence, you grew bold enough to gently remove his hand from his pocket and place the bandage in his palm, looking back up at him. You shared a momentary look with his chocolate eyes, instantly scrambling after realizing your hand was still in his.

He has really big hands. 

“We should um...probably go.” You avoided his eyes, stepping aside quickly to pull the door open.

Taehyung’s mind felt displaced, eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the fact that someone had actually left him with nothing to say, an extremely rare occurrence in his book.

He was even more displaced looking at the measly wrapper in his hand, then at the cut on the side of his finger, playing through the last 5 minutes of what just happened.

He scoffed to himself.

‘There’s something about her you won’t refuse.’

It had been 3 weeks since that meeting, not having seen Taehyung once as you wasted your time enjoying single life luxuries before you prepared for one of marriage.

It still felt odd to say such a thing, marriage, because it didn’t even feel like one, or a real one at that. It was forced, fake, a pressured one out of convenience. It felt more like a deal, something Taehyung and yourself had to settle for in order to keep your parents’ minds at ease.

That thought racked your brain all those 3 weeks; Taehyung had to settle for you, he didn’t choose you, just as much as you settled for him and didn’t choose him either. You both had ultimately agreed to the marriage only in an effort to optimize your parents’ happiness, not your own.

You had no clue how he felt, a mystery as much as the Bermuda Triangle, knowing he most certainly had a grand pick of women to choose from and you were most definitely his worst option.

You knew you were suddenly dumped on him, leaving him no choice in the matter as you learned your marriage entailed a beneficial business deal between your fathers’ companies, and Taehyung couldn’t really refuse you with so much on the line.

You had already felt inferior to Taehyung since the moment you met him, though your insecurities seeped further into the crevices of your doubtful mind the more you thought over that sad fact, contemplating a married life with him. In your opinion you were pretty much undesirable to him, Taehyung probably kicking himself knowing he had to unwillingly call you his wife for the rest of his life. 

You just knew you weren’t good enough for him, you would never measure up no matter how hard you’d try and that utterly terrified you. You were confident and independent when it came to yourself, though wedding a near perfect being regarded as one of Seoul’s finest in terms of a CEO and a man? 

Confidence be damned, this dude was intimidating. 

These were the feelings that swarmed your head as you sulked at your over-the-top engagement party, set up in a prestigious buildings’ gorgeous 37th floor riddled with baroque styling and embellishments, classical music gracing some of Seoul’s wealthiest patrons as their flutes clinked and snobby chatter filled the hall. 

It was all extremely high-status, reeking of upper class supremacy and quite frankly, it made you want to throw up.

You distracted yourself by bringing any and all types of alcohol to your lips, trying to focus on anything but your daunting thoughts.

The entire night you hadn’t talked to Taehyung, both of you having been too occupied with the numerous amounts of people meeting and congratulating you. This became a genuine nuisance as you’d mentioned before, this marriage was of convenience, one that brought families and companies together merrily and constituted hundreds of people attending your engagement party you didn’t really know.

Your friends were excited, over-the-moon you bagged a man like Taehyung and chastised you for not having told them about your engagement to him earlier. Your relatives similarly scolded you, pinching your cheeks and praising Taehyung like he was a God while they scrunched their noses at you for concealing him.

How could I tell you when I didn’t even know myself?, you thought.

It was funny they praised your ‘choice’ of a fiancé, positive nobody was saying the same to Taehyung without at least lying. The public only knew of you as your father’s daughter, never having seen you due to your vehement absence from anything remotely related to his company, and much of the business world in general. 

You weren’t part of that world, a world of greed and money-driven lunatics. It just wasn't you. It never suited you, left you with a bad taste in your mouth you constantly grimaced at and thought maybe you were the insane one for not understanding its flavour. As you grew older, however, you came to realize it simply wasn’t the path meant for you, someone who valued the independence and achievement of earning something for yourself, by yourself.

Ever since the inception of that principal, your young teenage self resolved you didn’t want to rely on your father’s wealth, especially not his influence or power to achieve your own place in life.

Your father had worked determinedly hard for years in order to stand as high he does now, warranting your acute admiration for your role model of a father, his now successful architecture business landing him a few buildings part of the Seoul skyline.

And after finally achieving his dream, it suddenly morphed into your own aspiration. His hard work drove you to want your own design part of Seoul’s breathtaking scenery as well, by means of your own effort, your own hard work. You didn’t want your father’s help. It felt wrong, like you were cheating if you used him to gain your place and so you condemned your life to one that separated yours and his. 

So you lived, worked and earned money without any of his influence.

You worked for an average architecture company where you felt comfortable, happy that you were away from the suffocating high-status business of your family. And although your detachment left your identity a mystery to many, your situation on the other hand was an extremely infamous one.

‘The-runaway-heiress’, was your staple trademark. The judgmental comments about your choice of life and the insults it warranted were never-ending, subjected to that criticism all your life.

There was no doubt Taehyung was hearing all of that, people probably warning him to step out of the marriage before it was too late. You weren’t like Taehyung, who was perfect, desirable, someone everyone either wanted or wanted to be. It left you glad and quite frankly, proud to be wedding a man of such caliber and incredibility, though left you wondering why in God’s name he would ever agree to marry someone like you; average, average and well, average.

“That’s your 5th shot, Y/N, slow the fuck down.” Your best friend Hana’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts, snatching the shot glass from your grasp. “It wouldn’t be cool if you were trashed at your own party, dummy.” 

Her sudden appearance brought a smile to your face. “I know, I just don’t feel well.” You sighed by the counter of the bar, seated atop a stool as you circled an empty shot glass mindlessly. 

“I get you, there’s like, hundreds of people here and you’re probably hearing a lot of different shit.” Hana appealed to you, having read your emotions like an open book. “Speaking of people, I wanted to ask, what’s up with Taehyung and his stare?”

You stifled a snort, looking at Hana’s incredulous face. “It’s just a habit of his. He stares at everyone.”

“Okay... sure, but I didn’t mean everyone, I meant you.” Hana emphasized, comically pointing.

You furrowed your eyebrows at her, arm leaning against the bar’s counter as you questioned, “What do you mean?”

“He doesn’t really stop staring at you, which is kinda weird. Unless you like that, I don’t judge people’s kinks.” Hana mockingly held her hands up in surrender, gauging a reaction out of you. 

You instantly grimaced, “It’s not a kink, Hana. Nice joke by the way, wanna sign up for SNL with that one?”

“I’m serious! I’ve been catching him just looking at you and I don’t know if it’s weird or hot.” Hana informed as you became more puzzled, her becoming oddly excited, “Awh, maybe he’s concerned with how much you keep drinking! That’s so romantic.” She chimed, looking off into the distance dreamily.

“Shut the fuck up, he wouldn’t do that.” You smacked her arm, snatching your shot glass back from her. “Besides, you’re one of the rare people who knows this marriage is fake, you know he doesn’t care.”

“Jheez, way to kill romance?” Hana rolled her eyes, smacking your arm in rebuttal before continuing. “I’m serious, though. This may be fake but he really does keep looking at you, and I don’t know what it means.” Hana speculated, contorting her lips as if in thought.

“It means nothing, Hana. You’re just seeing things.”

“Then why has he been staring at you depressed by the bar for the last half an hour?”

You nearly spit out your drink, “What?”

“Are you clueless or just dumb? He’s been talking to someone for 30 minutes but most of the time he’s been looking at you, and he still is, how haven’t you noticed?”

You creased your eyebrows in surprise as you slowly lowered your shot glass. You turned away from Hana to scan the small crowds of people mingling, eating, drinking in the hall.

You searched the room, drink still in hand until your eyes caught tall, dark and handsome in his finely pressed suit, casually standing with a drink in his hand by a table speaking to someone. You nearly jumped when your eyes locked with Taehyung’s, every cell in your body caught off guard.

What made your heart specifically race was the way he didn’t even look away from you. He held your gaze, casually conversing with the person in front of him, eyeing you until he finally cracked a small smirk before turning back to his companion.

Your eyebrows practically shot up to the sky.

“See, weird or hot? Am I even allowed to say hot?” Hana blurted as she reveled in your reaction. “And you really thought I was joking. You don’t believe anything I say, I could tell you the world’s ending and you wouldn’t believe me. I could tell you aliens finally invaded the planet and you wouldn’t believe me until the green motherfuckers knocked on your door themselves and-”

“Hana, shut the fuck up.” You cut her off abruptly and made a face at her. “Why did you even come here?”

“Grumpy, aren’t we?” She flashed you a sarcastic look before sighing. “Your dad wanted me to find you. You and Taehyung have to meet someone important, so you should stop drinking like an alcoholic, dumbass.” Hana informed hastily as she grabbed the shot glass from you and downed it herself.

“Your dad’s by the entrance, go before he gets mad!” She shooed you away, pushing you up until you whisper-yelled and smacked at her to let you go. 

You began stepping towards the entrance, smoothing over your dress and this was the moment you realized you may have drank a little too much. You were quick to reprimand yourself, cursing your unprofessional behavior as your inner equilibrium became slightly woozy, senses drowning out a bit, every sound hazed over with a buzz in your veins.

You sucked in a breath to pull yourself together, knowing your dad valued this person enough you and Taehyung had to meet them together. 

Taehyung.

You decided to glance in his direction, lips pursing seeing he wasn’t in his previous spot. You chose to ignore it, walking along until you felt a looming presence behind you, almost having time to acknowledge it before a hand suddenly touched the small of your back. 

“Looking for me?”

You nearly squealed, jumping with a hand ready to punish before calming down at the sight of Taehyung, sighing with relief. “Jheez, could you use my name? I thought you were a stranger.” 

“Well, hello to you too.” Taehyung quipped sarcastically. “And why would a stranger touch your back? Of course it’d be the only man in this room marrying you.” Taehyung narrowly eyed you, scrutinizing your reaction with his hand still pressed to you.

“People do a lot of whatever the hell they want, Taehyung.” You responded turning away from him, heels clacking as you continued to pace towards where your father stood. “W-why’d you do that, anyway?” 

Taehyung furrowed his eyebrows. “Because we’re engaged?”

“It’s not real, though.”

“It’s as real as it gets.” Taehyung finalized, making it a statement to smile at everyone you passed, to which you realized just how many pairs of eyes glued themselves to you. “This may not feel like a real marriage to us, but to the rest of the world it is.” 

He then suddenly leaned himself down to your height and lowered his tone, breath just ghosting your ear. “Y/N, we have to make this seem real, it’s the only way we’ll survive.” Taehyung was the closest he’s ever been to you, and the deep baritone of his voice as he called your name did absolutely nothing but manifest butterflies in your chest. 

Why was his voice so deep?

You shook the thought out of your head, ultimately choosing not to say anything because he was in fact, correct. You grinned widely continuing to mask the truth of your arrangements, leaning into him more as you settled for his hand on your back.

You’d noticed it before, but his hand felt particularly large against you now that he was so close. You glanced at his other hand resting by his side, impressed by how masculine they appeared; long fingers with running veins and a roughness to them, sculpted so well you were sure they deserved to be referred to as art. It tickled your giddy side for a second when they seemed to perfectly contrast your more feminine and smaller hands. 

It was kinda cute. 

You neglected your thoughts once you neared your father, warm-heartedly conversing with a well-dressed man you just about recognized. 

“Ah, there you both are!” Your father cheered, reaching out his arm so he could envelop you in a side-hug, returning Taehyung’s bow and addressment.  

“Dad, I heard you wanted us to meet someone?” You perked up in a superficial tone, at least attempting to act as though everything was fine and dandy in your life; maybe owing it to the alcohol to endure all the falsehoods.

“Yes, Y/N-ie, I wanted you to meet Mr. Won. Chang-in, my lovely daughter and whom I guess you already know, her fiancé and CEO of Kim Enterprises, Kim Taehyung.” Your father proudly presented you both.

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Won, Kim Taehyung.” Taehyung was the first to address the man, extending his hand and bowing as he greeted him. You were almost taken aback by how polite he could be, the way his charming smile graced his features and attractively displayed his perfect teeth. His manner of speech and etiquette were all refined with a high degree of professionalism as well, internally gawking at his duality.  

Wasn’t he acting all entitled with you just now? 

“Nice to meet you as well!” You collected yourself and cheered, a little baffled as to why Taehyung still rested his hand against your back. “I’m hoping my father has only said good things.” You earned a laugh from the group, Mr. Won responding by receiving your hand with a firm shake. 

“Ah, Namhyun, you forgot to mention how beautiful your daughter has grown, and your future son-in-law has me jealous! What a handsome and accomplished young man, the perfect match, the two of them.” Mr. Won praised you both kindly.

You and Taehyung both smiled and thanked him humbly, feeling some heat collect in your cheeks upon Mr. Won’s words. You two? The perfect match? Unless he believes a rock and a Greek statue belong together, then he’s absolutely correct. 

Other than that, you chest swarms with butterflies thinking you’re now referred to as ‘two’. 

Taehyung for some odd reason encircles the curve of your waist suddenly, pulling you closer to him. You last minute sputter at the intimate action before leaning into him, one arm nervously encasing his torso as the other rests against his chest. 

You feel him tense underneath you. 

“Aish, you’re such a flatterer. Y/N-ie, do you remember Mr. Won? My friend from university? You haven’t seen him in a while.” Your father rested a hand on your shoulder, trying to jog your memory. 

“Oh, you mean Mr. Won from SNU?” You suddenly remembered, looking to your father for confirmation. 

“Yes, so you do remember!” 

“Of course I do, how could I forget!” You smiled brightly and returned your gaze to the familiar man. “Mr. Won used to sneak me ice cream when you wouldn’t let me have any, Dad.” You scolded him with a playful jab to his arm, inviting more laughter. “I apologize for not recognizing you right away, it’s been a long time, Mr. Won, forgive me.” You solemnly apologized, Mr. Won giving you a look of understanding. 

“Ah, forget it, Y/N. Don’t worry about it, although since it’s been a long time I hope you remember my son? He should be here somewhere..” Mr. Won trailed as his eyes fished over the grand hall, scanning around. 

“Your son..” You repeated to yourself, realizing there was a familiar connection itching at your mind, he was your age actually-

Wait. 

Oh God, not him. 

Anything but him. 

You felt raw panic seep into the spaces between your ribs, your chest filling with a constricting feeling of anxiety you couldn't shake off. Your heart picked up speed and the alcohol coursing through your veins didn’t help your judgement or memory at all, mind fogged over with the poison we dare call alcohol.  

You felt stupid, so utterly stupid. How could you forget Mr. Won and who his Godforsaken son was? 

You felt an anxiety attack riddling you, shifting your weight on your feet as you tried to bite back your uneven breathing. You just couldn’t see this man, especially in a situation where you were standing next to your husband-to-be. 

Taehyung wasn’t so invested in the conversation before him, mindlessly nodding along before he felt you physically freeze next to him, his glance to the side confirming your pale look, watching as your panicked eyes faltered to the floor and revealed... fear? 

He registered your odd shifting and your failed attempts at plastering a smile, confused if you knew this guy and if you did, why were you freaking out so much?

Were you in love with him or something? 

The thought minutely bugged him until he watched you turn straight up uncomfortable, horrified when Mr. Won called out his son’s name. 

“Kiseok-ah! Come here!” 

You stopped breathing when you heard the name, eyes going wide as you avoided eye contact with anyone in the group, but caught Taehyung’s undivided attention. He grew curious when Kiseok sauntered over to the group, your hand on his chest suddenly squeezing his suit as the mysterious man greeted everyone respectfully.

Taehyung watched as his intrigued eyes locked on you, eyebrows perking up amusedly as his lips curved into a smile Taehyung honestly couldn’t admit to liking. 

“Y/N? Wow, long time no see. It’s been what, a year?” The man Kiseok called out happily, like there was absolutely no problem occurring here but as Taehyung felt your hand clutch onto his suit, lips just about quivering before you forced a smile, he knew there was most certainly a problem. 

“Yeah.” Your voice was weak, small, and Taehyung found himself wondering how a courageous person like you was all of a sudden cowering. 

He’d heard it all night, all the accounts of your other life away from the business world. He wasn’t going to lie, he heard a multitude of opinions concerning you, many of which including either looking down on you or telling Taehyung there’s many other, more powerful women in business he could’ve been marrying instead. 

But Taehyung didn’t care for their opinions, he found you the most powerful woman he could ever marry, and agreed to do so because of that very prospect. Sure, you were estranged from the business scene and practically abandoned any role you’d play in your father’s company in order to pursue your own personal aspirations, but if anything, Taehyung found it highly commendable. 

Taehyung knew it took guts to do what you did, a bold and daring act that no other heir or future heir of a wealthy company could ever think of doing, including himself. 

What he found to appreciate most was your unwillingness to give in, where you had to have heard all the back-handed and snobby comments, yet you still held your head up high, remained rooted and adamant in keeping your current way of life. It instantly signaled to him you were courageous, fearless, unable to be stopped in your tracks.

So when he watched you become smaller and smaller the more you stood in the vicinity of this Kiseok, he knew something was sincerely wrong. 

“Ah yes, it’s been quite some time. Why don’t we step away from you three? You could do some catching up.” Your father urged as he motioned Mr. Won to step away with him. You lightly addressed them only to have your hands neglect Taehyung entirely and start fidgeting, attempting to calm your nerves as the alcohol inebriated your system and magnified your anxiety by tenfold. 

“Ah, yes, Kim Taehyung, CEO of Kim Enterprises. I’ve been meaning to meet you.” Kiseok extended his hand as his voice irked you with every syllable, trying your best to seem like absolutely nothing was wrong. 

Taehyung reached out his hand in response uneagerly, giving a small shake while wondering why you let him go. “That’s news to me, nice to meet you.” Taehyung responded, already feeling an intense aura of discomfort and tension between you both, sensing he was missing out on something that seemed 6 ft deep. 

“Likewise. Y/N..” Kiseok suddenly turned towards you, making you wince. You painted on your smile as you lifted your vision. “Kiseok.” 

“How’ve you been?” 

“Better than ever. You?” 

“Marvelous, just wondering what your life’s looked like since I haven’t been in it.”

“I believe I said better than ever, didn’t I?”

Kiseok scoffed unamused, “So a year, huh? In all that time you suddenly found yourself a fiancé, and Kim Taehyung at that?” Kiseok seemed to be making light-hearted conversation to anyone outside of your group, though you knew deep down the hostility behind his words.

“Yeah, I did. It just happened.” You shrugged, gaining the confidence to counter him. “And you? Plan on putting a ring on any of your girls? Maybe the 5th or 7th one you liked?” You sarcastically questioned, furrowing your brows in mock contemplation. 

“No, you know I’ve always had my eye on one girl when it came to marriage.” Kiseok eyed you knowingly, purposefully, like he was trying to make it obvious.

You snorted and glared at him, “If I remember correctly, your attitude said otherwise.” hatred began boiling under your skin. You felt yourself growing angrier by the second, memories between you two coming back in flashes. You didn’t even realize you were shaking until Taehyung’s hand suddenly entangled with yours, pulling you towards him almost defensively. 

You were surprised, looking at your connected hands and back up at Taehyung. He returned your look, peering down at you as he smiled warmly, affectionately. 

“I’m sorry, Kisook? Was it? My future wife and I have plans for tonight. May you excuse us?” Taehyung didn’t even let Kiseok respond before he was pulling you away, in complete shock at his first lack of manners you’d ever seen. You were only left to watch Taehyung as he lead you along, gaining the timely opportunity to realize he was taller than Kiseok, and in fact significantly taller than you. 

Taehyung was a large man in general, you noticed. His shoulders looked broad from behind, accentuated by the fit of his suit which also emphasized the expanse of his chest, tastefully exposing his sculpted neck. His legs were long, proportioned perfectly in accordance with the rest of his model-like figure, which was ideally fit and contained just the right amount of muscle. 

Dear God, you took your time with this one. 

You didn’t even realize Taehyung had pulled you into a secluded hallway or that you were ogling him when he suddenly stopped, turning in your direction and snapping you out of a near fever dream. 

Yeah, alcohol was not a good idea tonight. 

“Who the fuck was that?” 

“What?”

“That douche, who was that?” Taehyung inquired slightly pissed, in need of the asshole’s identity after watching whatever shitshow he didn’t pay for. 

“Nobody, Taehyung, he shouldn’t concern you.” You looked away from him, pouting in a way that made Taehyung momentarily notice the plush of your lips. 

Again?, was all he could think, first, your mother, and now this guy? Just how many people did you have bad connections with and he needed to ignore? 

Why were there so many intricate pieces to you? 

“Are you kidding me? He concerns me now, your mother I can understand but this guy? Nothing to me. I could step on him.” Taehyung proclaimed confidently and stood up broader, conviction written all over his face.

You couldn’t help but giggle at his remark, resembling the thought you had earlier. “I was just thinking, you’re a lot taller than him.” 

Taehyung couldn’t help but bite back a smile, watching you giggle like a shy high schooler and his ears gladly welcomed the soft sound. “Damn straight I am.” He adjusted the jacket of his suit suavely. It was then he remembered what his other hand was doing; still holding yours. 

His eyes suddenly gleamed with mischief. 

He squeezed your hand a little tighter and yanked you towards him, bodies just centimeters apart as you crashed into him, all up in each other’s personal space.

Your eyes widened in complete surprise. 

 “So you were thinking about me, huh?” Taehyung teased with a stupidly lowered tone, a smug grin decorating his face. 

You ignored the electricity shooting through you, rolling your eyes and playfully sneering at him. “Shut up, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see you’re taller.” You forced space between you two and tried snatching your hand from him, but his grip transformed into an iron lock. 

“Says the one who was thinking about me.” 

“Taehyung, shut-” You almost huffed out but as soon as you stepped away, your copious consumption of alcohol suddenly attacked you all at once, vertigo making you lose your balance until Taehyung reached out to steady you. 

“Jheez, did you have to drink tonight?” Taehyung chastised you as you fell into him, head spinning with disorientation and growing flimsier by the second. “You’re probably a lightweight at your size.”

“I am not a lightweight. You don’t even know how much I drank, it was a lot.” You bit back in rebuttal, hooking onto his taut forearms as he supported you. 

“But I did see.” He voiced barely above a whisper, causing you to snap your vision up at him incredulously. “What?” 

“Nothing, it shouldn’t concern you.” Taehyung mocked, though still tried to fix you onto your own footing.  

You didn’t even get to scrutinize him further when you felt another round of dizziness plague you, balance faltering again. Taehyung huffed out and finally flanked you on his side, arm encasing your shoulders as he adjusted you. “Okay Miss I’m-Not-A-Lightweight, you should eat something.” He fit you beside him, beginning to walk you towards the main hall. 

Taehyung in this moment didn’t understand what he was doing, utterly clueless as to what was fueling his actions. He was uncertain why he found himself.. caring? He didn’t even know you, yet he couldn’t help but become a little concerned when he watched you down drinks like it was New Year’s Eve. 

How can all that alcohol fit into one tiny person?

What was he even thinking when he dragged you away from that Kisuk guy? Why did he feel like protecting you all of a sudden? A near sense of possessiveness? He wasn’t even your real husband. 

It started giving Taehyung a headache. This was all strange, a foreign concept he wasn’t familiar with and he didn’t know if it was the result of his considerate personality or only manifested solely because of you.

The same way Taehyung dealt with his inner turmoil, you dealt with yours; you were always so adamant on independence though ironically found yourself leaning on Taehyung.

Oddly, you let him carefully guide you back into the hall with no protests. 

It was the day of the wedding. 

You wish you could recall your emotions throughout the day, certain there would be at least a sliver of a positive one. Though as you remained unmoving, nearly catatonic, unresponsive to your surroundings, you knew there wouldn’t be a single happy memory in the tsunami of sorrow that attacked you today. 

Emotions of grief plagued consistently as you realized the loss of everything you valued most in your life. Your happiness, your freedom, your ability to choose. The stripping of all those bundled into an stifling wad in your chest that left you in a perpetual state of wanting to cry.

The sting in your heart when you realized your mother didn’t bother to come, the excruciating smile you forced onto your features when Taehyung’s mother delicately placed the veil atop your head, the secret tears you shed after adorning your body with a wedding dress you didn’t even choose; it all left you internalizing feelings of utter agony. 

And none of it was your real choice. 

Even the flowers at the wedding weren’t your favourite. 

This day was horrifying. You couldn’t believe you prided yourself on your independence, refusing to give in despite numerous challenges and never taking a word of what anyone said to you. Even when someone begged you to change or come back to your old life, you always chose for yourself. You never allowed someone to push you around, seldom coerced into anything solely based on the wishes of another. 

Yet here you were, standing just before the grand doors of a wedding you never asked for, having easily followed every word of your father’s and sacrificed your deepest principles in order to make him happy, to appease and live up to his expectations that weren’t your own. 

It was utterly frightening, appalling. As if you had lost the one true commendable feature of the intricate character you were, suddenly lost the acclamation of others even if they didn’t know the true nature of your marriage. 

But what disgusted you the most was truly, that you had lost respect for yourself. 

These grim thoughts were the ones that attached themselves to you as you hesitantly hooked your arm with your father’s. You used every ounce of strength to not flee, to remain here, to still walk down that isle with your head held high like you always have despite abandoning every foundation of the character you’d spent years working on.  

You didn’t care that your eyes watered, masking them with the facade of happy tears from the blushing bride. You didn’t care when your father looked incredibly concerned and wondered what was so wrong, you didn’t care how sorrowful you may have appeared to anyone at this ironically glamorous event. 

Though what you did care for was that you couldn’t hold your head up as you walked down the isle, vision fixated on the ground as your tears betrayed you, spilling out at the traumatizing feeling of not being able to stand tall like you always did, something stripping you of your self-reassurance, your strength, your confidence.  

It all spelled the requiem of your soul as you reached the end, dwelling in the impossibility this was happening to you until you felt the touch of Taehyung’s fingertips, guiding you up the stairs. It was then confirmed to you this was in fact real, part of your new reality you had no choice but to accept. 

You suddenly felt eternal gratitude for the veil that now covered your face, hiding the tears you cried at mourning the loss of everything you worked for.

While the priest’s words were read, you didn’t exchange a single look with Taehyung, knowing you’d only want to evaporate into the air, to run away at light speed or have someone in a turn-of-events suddenly take your life, just so you didn't have to face the humility of giving up the life you’d spent blood, sweat and tears building if you looked him in the eye. 

You felt the weight of your unknown future crushing you, pushing you towards the precipice as you gripped Taehyung’s hands harder to ground yourself. 

You were to rely on Taehyung, to share a bond with him you had never spent time cultivating, expected to live a life next to him while never being able to truly understand him, know him, love him. The natural process of falling in love now tainted with the coercion of a pressurized marriage, losing the opportunity to achieve any true sense of love. You’d never experience finding the one anymore, your soulmate, the other end of your red string of fate. 

That realization made your tears spill harder, disconnecting your hand from Taehyung’s to prevent your choked sobs becoming audible, holding your palm against your quivering lips. 

To anyone beyond you and Taehyung, it would look as though you were crying tears of happiness, joyously weeping at your matrimony with the love of your life, though as Taehyung felt the shaking of your hands, your refusal to meet his gaze as you reluctantly walked down the isle, the agonizing pain he could see through the sheer of your veil, he knew you were far from happy. 

He couldn’t help but purse his lips together tightly, knowing you were probably swallowing insurmountable torment down your throat because of this marriage, and tears pricked at his own eyes finding himself able to relate. 

He wasn’t just upset for you or himself, it was the entire situation, quite frankly the fucking world. The fact that the universe planned this as your destiny, his destiny, that the happiness of your parents and two companies came at the expense of both yours and his.

He knew you didn’t hate him, that he wasn’t the reason just as much as you weren’t the reason either, it was the arbitrary nature of the arrangement. That whatever version of true love and happily ever after you and Taehyung had separately dreamed of, it could never come to life. 

Even if the company meant everything to Taehyung, his CEO position more important than whatever position he’d play as some husband, seldom having time to consider love and relationships, he still harboured the same wants and desires any human would. A partner, a companion he truly loved with whom he’d start a family eventually, create a life for them and himself defined by love and comfort.

Though Taehyung only knew now you would both die with your decision-making capabilities robbed of you, bound to each other forcibly without the ardor of real love. 

Taehyung’s every thought was proven correct when the two of you exchanged your vows in near strangled chokes and shaky tones, appearing as happy emotions to the guests of the wedding though only you two knowledgeable of each other’s suffering. 

Your vision finally met Taehyung’s once you heard the rawness in his voice, your miserable emotions doubling when you registered he was just in the same pain as you. It was in that moment the priest’s words became audible and rang loud in both your ears, suddenly grounding you two to earth and reminding you of your reality. 

“You may kiss the bride.”

Both of your eyes grievously locked for a moment of horrified realization; that you were seconds away from going through with this, throwing each other’s lives away for the utilitarian benefit, abandoning any sense of choice in whom you both would spend a lifetime with.

Taehyung swallowed thickly as he removed your veil, feeling his eyes fill with tears again when he laid them upon your utterly devastated, tear-stained face. You were using every nerve in your body to stop yourself from sobbing and caving into the ominous thought of fleeing the ceremony.  

Taehyung’s sight wondered to your lips as they still quivered, nearly swollen red at the intensity in which you bit them, awaiting the kiss you were certain would be filled with frustration and hatred, hatred for the mud you were dragging him through, hatred for pressuring him into suddenly valuing something more than his work and his company, to suddenly become a husband to you. 

Though as he watched the terror flashing through your eyes, tears watering your lash line, he knew he could never feel anything so ardently negative towards you, remembering exactly what he was stripping you of. 

The life you built on your own, defying any and everyone’s expectations of yourself, cursing your heir status to hell, your strength, your independence. Now? Your life was bound to his, bound to one where you were obliged to sacrifice yourself for your father’s company and the upper class cesspool you’d spent so long trying to run away from. 

So as Taehyung began closing the gap between you two, nearing your shaking figure, he resolved he wouldn’t make this hard. He would try, try to accept that his life now entailed you, would try to work towards the balance his father insisted he needed, try to understand that you were now part of his priorities and could never simply ignore you.  

He glided his thumbs against the back of your hands that held his pacifyingly, leaning down until he was just inches from your lips as you squeezed your eyes shut. He unexpectedly spoke quietly, meaningfully, seconds away from sealing the deal of an uncertain future, though, remained certain of this one thing. 

“I’ll take care of you, Y/N, I promise.” And he kissed you in a single breath, no haste, no pressure, only the gentle touch of his lips as they met yours, soft and light. 

Maybe Taehyung didn’t know the exact feelings behind his promise, but he knew the meaning; that no matter the arrangement, the non-existent feelings, the loss of choice, he would at least take care of you like any husband would, a good husband.  

He at least owed you that.  

You were left shocked at the nature of his kiss, Taehyung’s warm lips connecting with yours tenderly. You were convinced the tears you saw in his eyes were enough to assert he hated this, frustrated he had to sell his soul, wishing to only rush the kiss so he could call it a day and ignore you for the rest of his life. 

Though what you never expected was the promise he made, or the way he kissed you with such intimacy you found yourself melting into his touch, reciprocating. He kissed you like you were fragile, locking your lips in a way that solidified his promise, as if out of all the empty vows you spoke today, this was the one, true vow he would keep. His lips felt plush against yours, catching his mouth just a little more before the bittersweet disconnection. 

You and Taehyung exchanged a poignant look, small smiles decorating both your faces with a mutual understanding swimming in your eyes as you gripped each other’s hands. You let his promise permeate the air between you two, finding solace in his words as the applause of everyone attending the ceremony filled the hall.   

Maybe it was the warm way Taehyung always pressed his hand to the small of your back when you spoke to others the whole night, maybe the way he veered you away from excessive amounts of alcohol with a light-hearted scolding considering that last time you drank, or maybe even the way he gently held you during your first dance..

Maybe it was all these considerate, kinds act that made you view Taehyung in a less negative light and rather a favourable one, that maybe he wouldn’t be the asshole CEO you’d first accused him of being.  

You would also be an idiot to not mention how completely and utterly handsome he was, looks carved by the Greeks themselves, quite possibly the hottest, most attractive man you’ve ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on. 

And maybe all that accumulated into your assured opinion that when it came to consummating your marriage with Taehyung, you’d have no qualms or worries whatsoever. You would be absolutely willing, ready to take the night on and maybe even have some fun for yourself with whom you could tell was a really, really nice guy.

Though as Taehyung walked calmly in front of you towards your hotel suite, reaching into his suit pocket for the card key he’d retrieved at the front desk to swipe against the lock, your chest clogged with a crushing feeling of anxiety you couldn’t subdue. 

These weren’t the same nerves of maybe being not pretty enough, body insecurities or fear of what to expect from Taehyung, no, these nerves came from the utter panic of having to experience sex with another man.

Especially since your last partner. 

It always started with your permission, that wasn’t the issue, Though what left you afraid, so utterly frightened with the thought of spending a night with a man like this came from the treatment you received from that partner. 

Safe to say, you weren’t treated kindly. Far from that, actually, you were treated as though you had no needs or were a means of simple use. Your last partner was the opposite of giving, he was selfish, self-absorbed and only concerned himself with his own pleasure, going on and on only until he was satisfied and neglected you in every sense of the word, sometimes even refusing to listen to you if you protested. 

To make matters worse, he wasn’t faithful. 

You knew he slept around, a lot, it was the number one reason you never agreed to actually date him, never make things official. 

But the reason you would end up sleeping with him was because of the most perfectly imperfect concept among the human race; love. You believed every time with him was a new chance to make that love real, that it was the genuine manifestation of your feelings for one another, thinking maybe he wasn’t the asshole he always portrayed himself as and could man up enough to love you unconditionally. 

And he completely reeled you in, made you fall in love too quickly and made you believe he was capable of love. This grew exponentially when you were often described as ‘the different one’, the one he always came back to, that you were special. You clung onto those words as much as you could, convinced each time you were in fact the one for him, that maybe one day, he’d wake up and abandon his fuckboy lifestyle and mature.

But everyday that went by, every promise that was never fulfilled, every word that wasn’t met with an action, and especially after every hook up that resulted in nothing new, you began to understand you were everyone’s favourite role in a Shakespearean play. 

The fool. 

You were a joke to believe anything he said, the most naive person on earth to think you were any different from the others, when every night simply ended in rough fucks, virtually no orgasm and miniscule aftercare.

It left you essentially scarred, traumatized that every man in the world was built like this. It didn’t help that whenever you look back, many of your ex partners were of the same cut, the same trope of assholes that don’t seem as bad but end up being exactly so. 

It was what made you swallow thickly as Taehyung opened the door to the suite, holding it open as he moved aside to let you enter first. You walked forward and unintentionally brushed against him, realizing how much smaller you were in comparison to him all over again. 

He towered over you, and it made you more nervous. 

You looked up at him momentarily and quietly thanked him as you stepped inside, setting your sights on the large, king sized bed situated on one side of the room, a lounging area with couches to the other side which lead to a bathroom. Seoul’s breathtaking skyline was visible in the dark of the night through wall-to-ceiling windows opposite to you, covered by flowy, sheer curtains. 

You took a deep breath, trying to remind yourself Taehyung was not the same. Not all men are the same, you can’t inflict the mistakes and wrongdoings of one man onto another, categorize them into one kind. You wanted to think this way, and you knew it was the humane way to think. 

But as the memories of those heart-aching nights filled your head, the empty words, the lack of care or concern, the neglect, the feelings of pure abandonment and use only caused your heart to beat profusely in your chest, clutching onto the neckline of your dress to breathe. 

What if Taehyung really was no different?

It then suddenly hit you you didn’t know him. All you knew of Taehyung was that he was a fiercely successful business man, sitting atop Seoul’s most prestigious with Godly looks and a stare that could kill a man. You remembered your initial feelings about him; his stare in fact intimidated you, quite frankly all of him intimidated you, he was the epitome of perfection and you were far from that very notion. It left you thinking you didn’t measure up, and that he could view you in a dissimilar light than you viewed him; an unfavorable one. 

He could simply not want you, but is forced to.  

You’d observed his kind behavior and actions over the odd two days you met him, though that was exactly the inculpatory factor; you had only met him twice. You didn’t know what he would be like alone, when it was just the two of you, when there weren’t eyes scrutinizing him and cameras snapping shots of his every move. 

You didn’t know how he would be like in the bedroom, either. 

Your mind raced as you conflicted with yourself, trying to understand that Taehyung could be different, though apprehensive with the miniscule knowledge you actually had of him. 

You discerned after that last asshole of a partner you needed the love and care of a real partner, someone who would tend to your needs, adore you in the midst of their actions, be a giver and not just a receiver.  

And you didn’t know if Taehyung would be that partner. 

“Y/N...” Taehyung called out to you rather softly as he removed his suit jacket, the rustling of the cloth signaling he had indeed done so. His footsteps were hard to miss, the soles of his shoes sounding against the hardwood floor as he neared your lonesome figure standing in the middle of the room. 

Your breathing quickened with nearly every step he took, attempting to resolve the civil war you were battling within. You were trying to convince yourself Taehyung would be a nice man, a nice husband; though couldn’t help but feel deflated by the fact it was all mainly coerced out of him.

Your thoughts overwhelmed you as Taehyung finally stood behind you, mere inches from your back as he watched you from behind, unbeknownst of any feelings or thoughts currently riddling you.

He hesitated, though gently placed his hand against your bare arm, the sudden warmth of his hand against your skin causing you to flinch. He peered down at your smaller self squarely focusing in front of you, anticipating your response. He grew slightly soft when you tentatively looked over your shoulders, clearly teary-eyed. 

Taehyung couldn’t miss how scared you seemed, and he his heart inexplicably stung at the thought you were afraid of him. 

“We don’t have to do this.” Taehyung’s voice was low and resembled warm honey, reverberating in a way that made you ease up. 

You worked towards a stable voice. “W-we don’t?” 

“No, we don’t” His voice held no disappointment, only the intention of seemingly wanting to assure you, firm and oddly comforting. 

“I’m sorry, Taehyung. I’m really sorry.” It was hard to keep your tone leveled, clutching your hand over your mouth as you swallowed your emotions. 

“Don’t be sorry, there’s nothing for you to apologize for.” 

You strangely felt the desire to hold his hand that rested against you, though you ignored the urge and simply stepped out of his touch, clutching your chest tightly in an effort to cower away from him. But it was here you suddenly remembered that he kissed you, and the way he did so. 

It made your cheeks fill with a rosy blush. 

“Do you mean that?” You’d finally turned to meet his eyes, his face only visible by the moonlight illuminating the room. He seemed to have retracted his hand and stood with both tucked in his pockets, relaxed. 

This became the first time you noticed just how ravishing he looked tonight. 

His dark hair was slicked back loosely and left enough pieces to fall as a comma, graciously exposing his forehead, his Tom Ford suit attractively hugged his model-like body, watch and accessories accentuating his expensive look. 

His features were casted over by soft lighting, somehow adding to his beauty as the glow made him appear... less intimidating, dare you say warm or inviting. 

His expression was funnily enough, one that you could actually read. He held no contempt, no impatience or anger, only a hint of consideration as his calm eyes looked at you. His face may have been predominantly blank, void of a smile, though certainty held a form of reassurance.  

“Of course I do, why would I do anything with an unwilling person?”

You scoffed lightly, “Not a lot of people would say that.” Your eyes faltered from Taehyung’s and clutched yourself tighter, expression completely telling of trauma.

Taehyung instantly picked up on it, eyebrows slightly furrowing at your words though softening once registering their weight. He felt an overwhelming sense of apology take him, thinking of his next sentence before his mind oddly flashed back to the night of the engagement party.

“Y/N, did Kiseok..?” Taehyung trailed hesitantly. 

You winced at his line of thinking, “No, no...not what you’re thinking,” you immediately denied. “Just, shitty experiences.”

“Shitty, as in...?”

“As in only seeking self-satisfaction, neglect, lies, infidelity. Can we go to sleep?” You deflected with a heavy sigh and a hand at your temple, the day’s events catching up to you.

Taehyung nodded in agreement, “Yeah, sleep. We both need that.” His eyes then landed on the bed, registering even if it were large enough you two could sleep apart, he still opted for caution. 

“Um.. you can take the bed, by the way. I’ll sleep on the couch-”

“No, don’t do that.” You replied quickly. “I can’t sleep on a king-sized bed all by myself, it’s huge.” You side-eyed the massive mattress and laughed a little, lightening the heavy aura casted over the room. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to be uncomf-”

“Don’t worry, Taehyung. You don’t make me feel uncomfortable.” You smiled at him lightly and received a small one from him, both your eyes mirroring the same sense of understanding you exchanged at the altar. 

“I’ll let you wash up first, your overnight bag should be in the bathroom closet.” Taehyung informed, pointing towards the direction of your things. 

“Thank you.” You voiced with an amount of warmth that made Taehyung want to genuinely smile, though crushed the weird urge and nodded agreeably instead.

You began walking away from him until a nuisance suddenly occurred to you, cursing yourself as you came to a full stop. “Um, Taehyung.. I forgot but could you..?” You angled your back towards him to call out to the ribbons tying the back of your dress, knowing you would’ve taken 20 years just to untie your bodice yourself. 

The fact that you weren’t looking directly at Taehyung made him feel relieved, glad he wouldn’t embarrass himself with the his eyes slightly widened. He was quick to reprimand himself, it’s just a woman’s dress, why the hell are you shocked? 

Taehyung swallowed dryly before replying, “Uh, yeah I’ll--I’ll do that.” He walked towards you sparingly and positioned himself behind you.

He’d noticed it before, but you were relatively small compared to him in size and it continued to poke at his brain, maybe even momentarily think it was cute. 

Cute? When have I ever found a girl cute?

Taehyung exhaled before his hands carefully made for the silk ribbons, his tentative fingers fiddling with the ties until he eventually began loosening each one. He started unlooping your bodice, breathing out considerably when each loop began exposing your back inch by inch.  

Taehyung’s sweet, hot breath fanned your skin, tensing each time as your every nerve went haywire feeling just how close he was. His slender fingers brushed against your bare skin here and there, making heat collect in your face.

You grew even hotter when your kiss with him suddenly crept back into your mind, unknowing of the reason why excitement and electricity shot throughout your body because of it. The way his soft, full lips met yours, mouthed at you tastefully repeated in your head, making you extremely nervous at how much a measly kiss from him was occupying your mind; it was just a kiss. 

Taehyung found himself tensing by the intimacy of the moment, remembering the way he so boldly kissed you. He found that he liked the plush of your lips, the way he had to bend down to your smaller height to lock lips; and it made him feel strange. 

How the hell was he taking interest in something other than his work? No, this isn’t interest, Taehyung thought, and would spend however long denying it. 

He’d finished the task throughout all his thinking, unrealizing of how proximal he was to you. He oddly hated that the moment was over, coming back down to Earth.

“There you go.” He cleared his voice and stepped away from you. 

You held your bodice up against your chest, realizing Taehyung had a full-access view of your back and you grew 10x hotter. You gulped at the thought before hastily turning around to thank him, quickly disappearing into the bathroom for a moment of reprieve. 

You shut the door and instantly breathed out a breath you didn’t remember holding, looking at your hot mess of a face in the mirror trying to cool down, reliving the last 10 minutes of what just happened. 

You took a deep breath. 

Maybe Taehyung is different after all. 

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[tooweirdforyou]

Maybe » Aomine Daiki

Aomine Daiki x Chubby! Fem! Reader

A/N : hi! My second non one piece fic so yay, I’m happy it’s for KnB and Aomine! Please enjoy! :3

note : I had soooo many ideas for thisssss but instead of my original idea, I went for something a little more Cliché ;-;

Summary : after being friends with Aomine for so long and developing feelings, you keep shut about them and protect your friendship. And then, Aomine finds out about what’s been happening.

-

“Daiki, would you get up already?”

No response came from dark blue haired athlete other than the gentle snores that escaped his lips.

You roll your eyes and went to pick up the women’s magazine that was opened across his face, just as the tan one sighs heavily and grunts out.

“Oi.. [Name]? Where’s Satsuki?” He groans, turning onto his side and pulls off the magazine from his face.

He takes a look to see the page he was looking at to be one of those thicker, curvy models.

You sigh and walk around to face him, kneeling in front of him once again, your thick thighs exposing itself from your skirt.

“She’s managing the boys at practice. She asked me to come get you.”

Aomine grunts out in annoyance at your words and looks up to see your face, staring down at him. He moved onto his back and continues looking at you.

“...”

His silence makes you smile a bit in defeat and exhale. “Come on, sleeping beauty, you need to get to practice. Otherwise, Satsuki will have my ass.”

“I’m too tired.” Aomine mutters, turning back onto his side, turning so he faced you this time and stares up at you lazily.

Examining your features in silence, Aomine took in your appearance at the moment.

There wasn’t a readable expression on his face so you couldn’t guess what he was thinking. His staring did cause your cheeks to pinken as his eyes shifted down.

He eyes your legs for a moment, the staring hard enough to make you shift to ignore it, as you poked him.

“Come on, just get up, please?” You plead making Aomine pout and close his eyes to avoid your expression. “I don’t care, I don’t wanna..” he sulks quietly.

You heave a heavy sigh and pat your skirt down and hum, leaning close to his face, his eyes still shut.

“I’ll buy you the latest issue of the swimsuit catalog for you~” you sang, in hopes of convincing him to get you.

The blue haired athlete opens an eye to come face to face with you, inches away, and seeing how close you were to him causes him to swallow and turn away, covering his eyes with his arms.

Fortunately, it seems it worked.

“...hmph, idiot.. I want the latest issue of the swimsuit catalog, the lingerie catalog, and I want bread..” He announces, pulling up his hand and bringing down a finger for each one he counted.

You roll your eyes playfully at him, and you held your pinky out for him. “Stupid pervert, it’s a deal.”

Aomine merely grins and moves his arm to face you again, connecting his pinky with yours and you both kissed your thumbs. Something you two did together since you were kids.

“I’ll be waiting.” Aomine grunts as he forces himself up and dusts his clothes, holding his hand out for you to take. “You better remember.”

You lift your hand to take his and helped yourself up, dusting your skirt. “Don’t worry, I won’t. I don’t think I could forget my best friend’s perverted desires.”

“You think too low of me.” Aomine furrows his brows as he began headed to the ladder.

“Do I?”

“Idiot.”

Shrugging, you head down after him, being sure to threaten him if he even dared look up at you as you climbed down, and headed to the gymnasium together.

—

Gently setting down your things on the ground by the door, jacket and cellphone, you went over to greet the coach and players.

“[Name]! Daiki!”

The pink haired manager runs over excitedly, practically bouncing with joy and stars in her eyes at the sight of them.

“You managed to convince him! Thanks so much!”

“Tch, you can’t even get me yourself, making [Name] do all the work.” Aomine scoffs and Satsuki pouts. “I’m busy doing my job and managing the others boys! Besides, only [Name] knows best how to get you to come.”

The pinkette widens her eyes and turns to you. “How did you manage to get him anyways?”

You gave a side glance to Aomine, who was too busy yawning and looking away to notice and you simply shrug. “He knows better.”

Satsuki just giggles a bit and grabs your hands, her clipboard tucked under her arm. “Thanks so much again, [Name]. I owe you one.”

“No problem, Satsuki.” You smile softly at her and watch her pull away to begin pushing Aomine to change.

“Alright, alright, stop pushing me.” Aomine grumbles as he walks forward, stumbling every few steps. He then turns back to give a smirk to you. “Keep your promise, you!”

“Of course I will!” You scoff, waving at him and smiling nonetheless, and began to head out after bidding goodbye to the other players and the coach.

Passing the viewers from up top, you hear particular comments.

“What promise could that fat girl make with Aomine?”

“Can’t be to spread her legs for him.. no guy would want a big girl like that.”

“Obviously. How does Aomine even know a piggy like her anyways?”

Their hushed voices and obvious stares only make you smile forcefully and walk out silently, ignoring their comments.

It wasn’t like it was the first time you heard something like that.

-

As soon as you open your locker, you find a couple notes slipping out from being held in place. You glance down before crouching and picked each one up, reading them as you did so.

‘Get some exercise, piggy!’

‘Lay off the foods for a while already.’

‘How can you stand to be so big? How does anything fit you?’

The bitter smile that formed from the sight made your heart heavy but you didn’t say a word.

It was a regular occurrence anyways.

It didn’t make you feel any better, considering your walk over to your locker, other students in the halls were pointing and staring over at you, as if you were a display.

As if it was strange to see someone like you there, someone big, where everyone else was thin.

You rip them up in two and set the pieces aside in your locker, grabbing your bag. About to shut your locker, you find the printed sheets Satsuki asked you to do and sigh.

“Better now before I forget..” you mumble to yourself, taking the ripped pieces and the printed sheets into your separate hands and closed your locker.

Slinging the strap of the bag over your shoulder, you begin heading back to the gymnasium so you could finally get home afterwards.

The gossiping whispers didn’t stop. Didn’t they have somewhere to be instead of loitering the halls?

Choosing to distract yourself, you thought about Aomine. The tall, tan, dark blue-haired athlete. It still made you surprised at your friendship but it was one of the best things that happened to you.

It was genuine, Satsuki and Aomine truly appreciated you and you appreciated them, there wasn’t anything you wouldn’t do for them.

The only you could regret was your developing feelings for the athlete. An athlete dating a chubby girl? Even you could laugh thinking about it.

However, you figured Satsuki had the same, so you could only suppress them.

Plus, you didn’t want to ruin Aomine’s image.

It seems you distracted yourself too much, because as soon as you turned the corner, you bumped into someone, causing the two of you to stumble back, the both of you falling.

“O-Oh, I’m so so-“ despite you also falling, you look to the opposite person to apologize, but you were cut off by her scream.

“Oh my gosh! She touched me! Oh my gosh, get away from me, fat girl! You could’ve crushed me!”

The other girl, seemingly her friend, quickly helped her up and both glared hard down at me.

“W-What? I-“

“Are you seriously talking to me? Oh my gosh, Sera, let’s go to the locker rooms so I can wash this filth off me.” The other girl nods as they begin to walk off, but a third voice cuts in.

“Let me help you with that.”

Before any of you could react, the rude girl was suddenly soaked with water, emitting a surprised shriek from her once again.

“What the fuck?! What the fuck are you-!” The three of you turned to see a particular tanned male and your eyes widen.

“Daiki?!”

“Aomine!”

His ignorance towards you made you furrow your eyebrows, his attention kept on the two girls.

“There, all cleaned, now get the hell out of here.”

It was clear the girls were stunned at Aomine’s attitude and overall appearance, but even worse, was his piercing, sharp glare sent to them that sent shivers down their spine, and even you could feel a bit of goosebumps.

“Aomine.. we were just—“

“I don’t really care. Get lost already, it’s a bother to hear your voice.” His glare immediately disappears and he rolls his eyes, turning away with disinterest.

The girls gaped at that and quickly scurried off, you barely noticing her tears from her wet skin.

Once the girls were gone for good, Aomine immediately turns to you, making you startled. His gaze down at you makes you a bit uncomfortable but you continued to stare at him.

“Daiki.. what are you doing-?..”

His stride towards you makes you stop your words and watch him grab your wrist and help you up to your feet.

And then suddenly, he pins you to the wall, hand still gripping your wrist and other placing itself beside your head.

His lazy, unreadable expression is plastered as he leans close. His eyes flick back and forth between yours, as if it’s searching for something.

His peripherals then catch sight of the ripped papers and he snatches them away, pulling away to read the writing.

“H-Hey! Daiki!”

The athlete doesn’t say anything and you can’t reach for it back because he’s so tall.

Aomine silently connects the papers together and reads the full text, and you can’t see his expression since he turns away, but you find his hands clenched tightly into fists, muscles tensed and veins forming as he crushed the papers.

It scares you a little bit to see, so you try to calm him down, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, it’s fine, okay? It doesn’t bother me anymore, so just-“

“Anymore?.. so it has before?” Aomine scoffs. You flinch and sigh. “Maybe, but look, I don’t care about it so let’s drop it, okay?”

Aomine clicks his tongue and turns around to look at you, an irritated yet pained expression taking over. You could actually read it.

“You know... you really are an idiot.”

You pout at that and frown. “The nickname really is unnecessary. You’ve been calling me that since I tripped over my own to feet and spilled my ice cream on myself when we were like, twelve.”

“Because you really were an idiot then! You tripped over nothing.”

“I tripped over some rocks, you jerk!” You scowl, shoving him which caused a small smile to form despite his pained expression seconds prior. His heart still ached knowing you were being bullied like this.

Aomine just shrugs and walks off, making you surprised. “W-Wait, why’d you even come here anyways? You should be at practice.” You began jogging after him.

He stops suddenly, lifting something off his shoulder. It was your jacket and your phone was in his hand, having taken it out from his pocket just now.

“You left it in the gym earlier. I didn’t want you to freak out and forget, and then not text me when you got home safe.”

Your eyes widen at you recall placing it down by the door. “Oh..” you must’ve forgotten when you were ignoring those girls from before. “Thanks..”

You reach up to take it from his hands and think back on his words, tightening your grip on your belongings. Aomine gives a long glance to you before taking your hand.

He holds it up and pressed his palm against yours quietly, you watching silently as he slowly intertwined your fingers and wraps his arm around your body. The action was enough to cause your cheeks to warm but you didn’t protest.

Pulling you close, he tightens his embrace, afraid to let go. “Hey, I..” he pauses for a moment, leaning down more so he was by your ear.

He thought for a few seconds before deciding to change his mind. Aomine shuts his eyes and relaxed himself.

“Nevermind.. just get home safe.. and promise to tell me if something like this happens again. Okay?”

His voice is a whisper, and you can’t see his face but you can hear his weak tone.

“I will.. I promise.”

You slowly pull away and held out your pinky again, smiling softly when he connects his with yours and kissed his thumb.

You thought about confessing to him. Now is the perfect time, isn’t it?.. but, the small fraction of you that’s scared, overpowers your confidence and you just smile at your friend.

“I’ll text you when I get home. Thanks again, and give this to Satsuki when you get back.” Handing the printed sheets to him, you take a step back and wave, slowly turning.

“See you tomorrow, Daiki.”

“..Yeah.. See you.”

You both turn away from each other in the hall, both wearing a somewhat pained expression for similar reasons and shared the same thoughts.

‘Maybe one day... one day I’ll confess to him/her..’

—

A/N : this is all over the place and not really meshing well together but look, I’m tired. I literally got the vaccine recently and I’m so freaking sore.

Also, is it normal to have chills? The next day, I was FREEZING all day.

#tooweirdforyou #knb x reader #knb aomine #kuroko no basket #kuroko no basket x reader #kuroko’s basketball #aomine daiki #aomine daiki x reader #x reader #knb writing #kuroko no basket writing #aomine x reader

[strawberrymiya]

An unknown darkness (GWSN Miya x Reader) (Part 1)

Historical AU fic set in England in the 1970s (specifically 1976), reader is a middle class executive and ends up hiding from the police with punk Miya. Angst, historical accuracy and plenty of retro English language. Some remarks about sexism and the position of women are included, but I chose to ignore attitudes about same sex relationships simply for ease of writing (title comes from lyrics to GWSN's 'Black Hole').

Pairing: GWSN Miya x Female Reader Word count: 3321

A/N: Shock horror I can write angst too?? So it's not exactly what I've been doing so far but the idea called for it so I gave it a go, let me know what you think! Some research went into this for accuracy, but I'm extremely interested in this time period anyway so a lot is just from memory ^^ A big thank you to my #1 supporter @goldenfxre for your help in many ways, this is for you!

Read on Ao3

Alone at night in a town you’d never been in before was never a good place to be. The hotel you were staying at was only supposed to be a couple of streets away, how had you gotten lost?

You were staying in a whole different part of the country; your company had some important meetings taking place, and had sent you as one of the higher ups to attend them. It was the first day of three, and after the day’s meeting some employees had invited you for casual drinks at the local wine bar. One of the employees told you your hotel was only a couple of streets away from the bar, so you thought it would be easy to find your way back. Now, at about midnight, you were wandering around lost, and the streets were empty.

You weren’t entirely sure what to do; you knew the street name the hotel was on, but none of the signs had what you were looking for. You had seen a police car parked, but didn’t want to resort asking them for help as they were on duty. There was a telephone box you had circled round a couple of times, but you were the only one staying at that hotel so had nobody to ask for directions.

After passing the telephone box for the third time, you decided to try a different turning; a little back street that you weren’t sure looked totally safe, but it was the only option you had left. There wasn’t much down there; a newsagents, a bookies and a grubby looking club. The sign in front was peeling off and barely readable, the walls were covered in graffiti and possibly the odd blood stain, and there was empty broken glass bottles dotted around the car park. It looked like a very different place to the wine bar you had just been drinking in.

During your few moments of staring at the club, the doors opened and the people started to spill out. They all had orange or black coloured hair, dressed in leather or denim jackets covered in spikes and tears. The sound of an army of combat boots soon flooded the empty street, and you soon realised it was a punk club you had found yourself stood outside of. Punks were a very new type of person, and you didn’t have many round where you were from, so you had only heard about them. Seeing them in the flesh; these cold blooded rebellious anarchists, could they really be such dangerous people? Surely one of them would give you directions.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a loud crash of glass. You quickly turned your head, seeing a gaping hole in the window of the newsagents, glass scattering the pavement below. Someone had thrown a brick through it.

The punks began to move much more quickly as you heard a police siren, the white car with the bright red stripe you had seen earlier arriving instantly. Was it one of the punks that had thrown it? You’d watched every person that had come out of that club, none of them had even approached the newsagents. With them all beginning to evacuate the area, you had to find someone quick if you wanted directions.

It was then that you saw a woman stood still; she was loading instruments into the back of a Reliant Robin, looking round clearly concerned. She must have been with one of the band members playing in the club. She had a jet black short mullet, and was wearing jeans covered in rips, zips and chains. She wore a denim vest jacket (the sleeves having clearly been ripped off) covered in studs over a black t-shirt, and the same black combat boots as everyone else you had seen walk out of the club. The other female punks you had seen looked different to her; they wore black fishnets and short skirts, this woman blended in with the male punks more.

You decided to go for it, quickly making your way across the road and over to her. She had closed the door of the van before it drove off; you had the perfect chance to talk to her before she walked away. She turned and had began to walk as you approached, and she stopped in front of you in surprise.

“Hello, I’m so sorry, could you-”

“What are you doing?” The stranger interrupted you, agitated. She stayed still in front of you, but was looking round as if she was in a hurry.

You stuttered, “I was just wondering if you knew-” She cut you off again, this time by grabbing you by the arm and forcefully pulling you across the road, her large strides taking the two of you down a dingy alley next to the bookies. As she took you, you feared every scare and rumour about these people were true. Was she going to hurt you?

She stopped walking right at the end of the alley, almost shoving you into the wall as she released you. Before you had a chance to escape, she commanded,

“Don’t move. We’ll have to hide down here, they can’t see us.”

Although her tone was intimidating, she wasn’t threatening you. You were hiding.

“Why do we have to hide down here?” You asked, not fully understanding the situation you found yourself in.

The stranger leaned back against the dingy brick wall, just avoiding the dripping pipe stream that ran from the gutter of the roof to the drain below. She took a cigarette and a lighter out of her inside pocket, casually placing the tab between her teeth as she spoke, “some tosser chucked a brick straight through a window just before we all came out, pigs shown up, they’re gonna take one look at me and put me in the nick, aren’t they?”

This puzzled you, you feared your innocence poking through as you responded, “not necessarily.”

A small laugh of amusement came out of the stranger as she lit her cigarette and stuffed her lighter back in her inside pocket, “yeah, you’re definitely not from round these parts. Round here pigs don’t let people like me just walk past on a quiet night, no, we’ll wait here till they move on.” She spoke with such an air of casualness; hiding from the police was a highly unlikely experience in your world, but to her it seemed banal. It was in this thought that you suddenly realised something,

“why do I have to hide? I don’t look suspicious.” You put in effort to sound headstrong, but were slightly frightened to argue with her. She looked you dead in the eye, letting out a puff of smoke directly towards you. You did your best not to cough on reflex.

“Listen, pigs know we’ve just come out, they’re gonna ask any bugger who’s knocking about questions whether they have serial killer written on their forehead or not,” her tone darkened as she stared down at you, “if you walk out there and they ask if you’ve seen anyone, you know I’m down here, and I am not being grassed out by some posh tart in a business suit.”

Her bluntness was really starting to annoy you, but you bit your tongue, “but you’re innocent. Even if I did tell them you were down here they would have nothing on you.”

The stranger smirked again, her eyes shifting towards the end of the alley, checking for anyone who may spot the two of you, “that’s not how it works, sweetheart.”

You studied her expressions, wondering what she could see, and most of all, if it was clear for the two of you to go. Her face turned to one of frustration, and you knew you weren’t leaving any time soon.

“They’re inspecting the fucking window now,” the stranger spoke with gritted teeth, flicking some ash off the end of her cigarette onto the ground before turning back to you, “looks like we might be here a while.”

Great.

“Well, as long as we’re stuck here we might as well introduce ourselves,” you got the courage to speak again, giving her a small smile to try and ease the tension, “I’m (Y/N)”. You decided against a handshake; she’d probably just stub her cigarette out on your palm.

The stranger gave you another cold look, exhaling another puff of smoke before rolling her eyes and asking, “are we really doing this?”

You leaned back, almost wanting to give up with her, “it’s better than us standing here in silence.”

She paused, and you watched her eyes gaze at the floor; she was possibly considering whether to go along with your polite conversation. She gave in,

“I’m Haruka.”

You gave her another smile, “it’s nice to meet you, Haruka.” She stared you down again, and you dropped the smile. You quickly thought of some sort of conversation to make with her, “so, do you know the band that was playing in that club?”

Haruka sighed, exhaling more smoke, “it is my band that was playing in that club.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” you remarked, trying not to sound too shocked, “what do you play?”

“Bass.” she answered bluntly, again looking towards the end of the alley where the police were still inspecting the broken window, “my mother says only boys are supposed to play in bands but it’s 1976, you know what I mean?”

You nodded; times were surely changing. You were one of the higher ups in a company full of men, it took a lot of hard work and dealing with sexism, but you managed it legitimately. Why couldn’t a woman play bass in a band?

Haruka looked at you again, her hard exterior slowly beginning to soften as she asked, “so, what do you do? You’re not an MP are you?”

You smiled, shaking your head to reassure her, “I’m in stocks and shares. I’m actually only here on business.”

“So why was it that you stopped me before, and got us stuck down here?”

You ignored the fact she had just blamed you; you wanted to remain polite, “I got lost looking for my hotel, I was trying to ask if you knew where it was.” You admitted, trying to keep your pride in front of this woman who kept staring you down.

“The only hotel round here is the one round the corner from the high street, you can’t miss it if you go up past the Chinese takeaway.” She informed you casually, but you had no idea what she was talking about.

“I… haven’t a clue where that is.” You answered shamefully. It was nothing to be embarrassed about, you’d never been to this town before of course you didn’t know your way round, but Haruka had an air about her that made you feel embarrassed to be clueless. You wish you hadn’t tried asking her for help, then you wouldn’t be stuck down here.

For the first time, Haruka showed a genuine smile, “that’s alright, I’ll show you later.”

You looked at her slightly surprised, and she turned her eyes down to the ash falling off her cigarette, still smiling. Maybe the rumours were wrong about these people.

“So is the band how you earn money, or do you have another job?” You dared to ask.

Haruka smiled to herself, amused, “no, I’m on the dole. You’ve probably never heard of that where you’re from.”

You gave her a look of confusion, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Posh suit, nice accent, by looks of you you’ve probably never lived in a council flat in your life.”

She was beginning to annoy you again now; why did she keep making so many presumptions about you from your job and appearance?

“Don’t act like you know who I am because of the way I look.” You snapped back.

Haruka simply chuckled, “I’m not acting, I know your type. You all drink in wine bars and live on posh roads without a single window boarded up. You’re probably only an exec because your father has contacts, either that or you slept with the boss.”

What you were hearing was unbelievable. You could actually feel your blood boil as you took in the accusations she had just given you.

You couldn’t hold back this time, “you don’t know my life. I’ve worked hard to get where I am, I wasn’t given anything to get me in this position. Yes I drink in wine bars and have a nice job and can afford my own property, but I’m not some privileged tory if that’s what you’re trying to make me out to be.” The words spat out of you with the surge in confidence you had to defend yourself against her. Haruka looked taken aback, not expecting such an outburst from you. It looked like nobody had ever challenged her back before.

“So you’re not a tory then,” she finally replied, her gaze remaining on the ground, “good.”

“No, not that it’s any of your business, but I voted for Wilson in the last election.” You told her truthfully, softening your tone ever so slightly, wanting to ease the tension again.

She raised a smirk, “well it was either him or that Ted Heath, good job he’s out. Who is it they’ve got now? Ah yes, Thatcher the milk snatcher.” She began to sound more amused, turning her head upwards as she took a long puff of her cigarette, and you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at her remarks. Haruka continued, “god forbid she becomes prime minister one day.”

With the tension eased, you were intrigued to understand more about this stranger. You asked, “do you enjoy being in a band?”

“It’s a good way to pass the time,” She answered. Her casual, uncaring front had returned; nobody was in a band just to ‘pass the time’.

“Do you play at that club often?” You inquired casually, just out of curiosity.

“Regularly. Usually a pig free area round here,” Haruka remarked, gesturing towards the end of the alley at how the circumstances had changed tonight.

You suddenly remembered how she had blamed you earlier for your predicament, and you were compelled to give her an apology, “I’m sorry about getting us stuck down here.”

“You’re cute,” Haruka gave you a warm smile, taking the tab out from between her teeth end exhaling more smoke as she assured you, “Not your fault, blame the git who thought it would be funny to chuck a brick through a shop window. It’s just the way it is.”

There was a lull of silence between the two of you. Usually if a conversation died down, you would give a simple “nice to talk to you, I should be leaving now”, but you still couldn’t leave. You had to think of something else to ask her.

“Do you do this often?”

Haruka looked at you, puzzled, “what do you mean?”

“Hide from the police. Do you do it often? You seem so used to it.” You explained, suddenly wary if you had overstepped the mark. You were just interested to know why she was so frightened of authority.

She gave you a small chuckle as she answered, “more times than I can remember. You see, pigs don’t like people like me. They read too many newspapers, think we’re all rough and scum who’ll pick a fight with any of the boys in blue within a mile. Thing is it’s them who approach us most of the time.” Haruka seemed so unbothered; what she seemed to experience on a daily basis was completely incomprehensible to you. The police where you were from protected, they didn’t start fights or harass innocent citizens for the way they dressed. Or maybe you had just never seen it.

“I’m sorry,” You managed to get out, “that sounds awful.”

“I don’t need your pity.”

“No, I know you don’t, but I can say what I want, it’s a free country isn’t it?” You responded. She may have been a tough, cold anarchist, but you were still allowed to give her sympathy.

“At least that’s what they tell you,” Haruka smirked as she flicked more ash off her cigarette, watching it fall to the ground before looking back up at you, “say what you like, sweetheart.”

“I just don’t think it’s right how they target you, or people like you. You’re a nice person, I like you. I trust you.” You stated to her honestly. She could be annoying, but you’d managed to wear enough of her away in this short time that you could tell she was a genuine person. You actually did quite like her.

Haruka looked a little lost for a second; perhaps she wasn’t used to receiving such simple compliments. You swore you could see her face turn ever so slightly red in the dim street light. As you looked at her, she suddenly avoided your gaze, turning her head to the other end of the alley as she put her cigarette back between her lips.

She quickly took it back out again, stating, “hang on, jam sandwich is leaving. We’re in the clear.”

You tried to make sense of what she had just said in your head before asking, “have the police left?”

“Yep, off they go,” She dropped her cigarette on the ground and stubbed it out with her boot, keeping watch on the police car as it drove away. She then began to trudge out of the alley, saying, “come on, let’s get you to your hotel.”

You stayed still, all the events of tonight suddenly washing over you. She took a few steps before turning back to you with a smile, raising her eyebrow and asking, “do you need to hold my hand?”

Her light remark brought you back into the present, and you gave her a small laugh before catching up with her, the two of you safely walking out of the alley and down towards your hotel. She was right; you did pass the Chinese takeaway. The journey was short, so you only had light conversation on the way there. Soon you were stood outside the entrance.

“Thank you so much for this, Haruka.” You gave her your gratitude as you retrieved the hotel key from your pocket.

She gave you a cheeky smile, “no problem. Don’t want you getting lost again, do we? You might bump into the likes of me.” You both chuckled.

“I wouldn’t mind bumping into the likes of you again, Haruka.” You responded. Haruka tried to give you another smile, but had become quite shy over your compliment again. You gave her a moment to find her edgy, mysterious persona again, but you knew she was flattered.

Haruka then leaned closely towards you, pushing her hands into her trouser pockets as she decreased the space between you. You could feel her nicotine tainted breath she got so close, and you felt your own face heating up at her proximity.

“Maybe I’ll bump into you again sometime, then.” She spoke under her breath, a slight smirk on her face. Then, she swiftly backed away, turned on her heels and strided off into the night.

You watched her walk away, taking a few seconds to collect your bearings and remember where you were. This woman was so fascinating to you; how you had gone from thinking she was harmless, to being almost unable to stand her, and now she was so charming towards you? You barely even knew her, yet you felt she was something really special. She somehow had took you out of your own little world and brought you into hers, just by chance of you getting lost and asking her for directions.

As you unlocked the hotel door and entered the building, you wondered to yourself,

Is she playing at that club tomorrow night?

Part two

MASTERLIST

#gwsn #girls in the park #haruka miyauchi #miyauchi haruka #gwsn miya #girls in the park miya #gwsn fanfiction #girls in the park fanfiction #gwsn miya x reader #girls in the park miya x reader #gwsn x reader #girls in the park x reader #gwsn scenarios #girls in the park scenarios #gwsn imagines #girls in the park imagines

[idy-ll-ique]

Apprentice.

Pairing: Stephen Strange x F!Reader

Genre: Fluff, Mutual Pining

Warning: Forced kissing (?) idk how to put it. Almost one non-consensual kiss.

Summary: Doctor Strange, World's Greatest Sorcerer, is in love with his apprentice. Unfortunately, when it comes to love, he's a dumbass.

Author's Note: Hey guys I'm sorry I haven't posted in so long! My college started, my classes are going on in full force and I haven't written anything readable in so long ugghhhh hope you guys enjoy this (Except for Loki, Spider-Man, Bonky and Steeb, the other characters' fics don't do that well 😳 but I'ma post this nonetheless)

---

Stephen POV:

I sighed as I watched Y/N sitting on the floor talking and joking around with the Cloak of Levitation. "Skedaddle, skedoodle..." "Y/N—" "Your dick is a noodle!" Levi made a happy noise and wrapped itself tightly around Y/N. She completely ignored me, laughing as the cloak hugged her.

Y/N was my apprentice. She also, coincidentally, happened to be the woman I was totally, hopelessly and obsessively in love with. "Y/N, if you're done, maybe you can come here and help me!" I yelled as cold-heartedly as possible, finally having enough. "Sorry, sir," she whispered.

Oh, the things she did to me when she called me 'sir'. Of course, Y/N was the best apprentice ever. She was the student every teacher dreamed of. Wait, that came out a bit creepy— She got up and quickly walked to me. Levi settled herself back on my shoulders. Y/N took a book in her hand and started reading.

I silently watched her as she focused on the book. Since I was so in love with her, my mind believed that maybe being cold to her would help me. I needed to get rid of distractions and Y/N... she was my biggest distraction. "Sir, I found it!" Y/N squealed, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Give that to me," I huffed, grabbing the book from her hand. "You may leave." Y/N nodded and got up, walking out of the library. I watched. The way her hips swayed when she walked, the way she only liked to wear skirts and sweaters all the time drove me crazy.

It was hard not to be in love with such a beautiful person.

Y/N POV:

"What's his problem," I grumbled as I picked my book off the stairs. I sat down on the fourth step and opened the book again. I was an apprentice to the one and only, Doctor Stephen Strange. I liked it at the New York Sanctum, that's where the both of us lived. I liked being an apprentice to the Sorcerer Supreme too, that is, if he treated me like a person.

He never talked politely to me. I was very damn sure that whatever it was, was my fault. I did something. So I started taking care more. I never messed up. It had been months since my last mistake. All of Strange's friends commented well about me. Wong and Mordo said I was the best apprentice there was. Even the Ancient One said I was good.

So what was Strange's problem? At least Levi liked me. She was the only one I could talk to freely, even though the cloak itself couldn't talk. As I quietly sat and read on the stairs, I heard a loud knocking on the door to the sanctum. Startled, I stood up. Before I could move, Strange was running down the stairs. "Don't move," he growled, stopping me as I followed him.

His hand collided hard with my chest and I was thrown back. I landed on the stairs on my butt. I groaned and scrambled back to my feet as Strange opened the door. Outside stood the two Norse Gods, Thor and Loki. My eyes widened.

I stood silently as the three of them chatted. A blush crept up my cheeks as I noticed that instead of focusing on what Strange was saying, Loki was eyeing me up.

I honestly didn't think I looked that great. Sure, I had a maintained figure and a thankfully unblemished face but no one would be into this. I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and looked away, Loki's stare still burning holes through my body. I heard Strange sighing.

"Alright, follow me. Y/N, keep an eye on Loki. Make sure he doesn't touch anything," Stephen glared at me and went upstairs with Thor. I looked down. Why did Dr Strange hate me so much? As far as I remember, I had done nothing to him. "It's sad, how he treats you."

"What do you mean?" I looked up at Loki, confused. I grew extremely self conscious as Loki took a few steps towards me, smirking. "Judging by his tone and glare, he clearly despises you. Why do you still continue to be with him, dearest?" he crooned and I took a step back.

"It's— it's not what you think... I'm his apprentice, not his girlfriend," I whispered, uncomfortable. "An apprentice? How nice."

"Wh-What?"

I got incredibly scared when Loki smirked more and stepped closer to me. "That means you're available, aren't you? Unless..." I shook my head furiously. "I'm not dating," I said in a rush. Wait, why was I acting like that? I wasn't interested in him, not at all!

There was no denying he was handsome and intelligent, but I just didn't like him that way. "Good. I've always wanted a pretty princess like you." I audibly gulped as Loki stood an inch away from me. I was standing on the sixth step on the stairs while Loki stood on the fifth. Even still, he was taller than I was. He leaned down and breathed out.

My heart rate skyrocketed, what was he doing? Whatever it was, I didn't like it. I loved someone else. I was in love with my teacher, Stephen Strange. It hurt me everyday how much he hated me but I liked him a lot. As soon as Loki's lips were about to be placed on mine... "Loki, I told you not to touch anything!" Loki quickly pulled back and stepped down.

I continued standing where I was, my eyes closed as I breathed heavily. When I opened my eyes, I saw Strange glaring daggers at Loki. It looked as if he was about to kill Loki then and there. "Sir—" I started but he cut me off. "Ah-ah! Shut up, I'll deal with you later!" he growled.

"Yes, sir," I whispered, looking down. My eyes filled with tears, what was happening? When no one was looking, I wiped my tears.

Alas, I was wrong. Strange saw me wiping my tears and his heart finally shattered.

Stephen POV:

I could not believe the audacity of that terrible excuse for a demigod. How dare he try to kiss the love of my life right under my roof?! I was incredibly upset when I saw that Y/N wasn't pushing him away. I knew she had always been a shy person, but...

"Thor, take your brother and leave," I grunted, opening a portal. Thor was just looking around awkwardly as Loki smirked at me and I glared at him. "I'll not be forgetting about you, Y/N!" Loki purposely yelled as he stepped through the portal. I looked at Y/N as he said it and saw her flinching.

So she really didn't care about that man. My heart broke. Why was I treating her like this? Like a caged animal? Like a disappointing kid? Y/N was far from disappointing, she was excellent. When the portal closed, I looked at Y/N. "Care to explain?" I snapped, crossing my arms.

"It wasn't me, it was all him," she whispered, her voice breaking. She was trying not to break down. "What did he do?" I questioned. "He... he tried to kiss me. I didn't want to do it. I don't like him that way." Y/N was still looking at the ground, her book long forgotten on the stairs.

I picked it up. "I want you to look up when we talk!" Her head snapped up and her eyes widened. I was holding her book out to her. She extended a shaking hand and accepted the book. "Th-Thank you," she stuttered. I realised that her whole body was shaking. That's when it hit me, how difficult it was for her.

I treated her like scum, blinded by my own mind. She was doing her best to impress me yet I continued ignoring her. Today's incident must have been worse for her. I mean, being taken without consent... my mind cleared up.

I had to make it up to her.

"Come on, Y/N, let's continue with our research, shall we?" I asked her softly and she nodded, still avoiding my eyes. We walked to the library. After that, I treated her like the princess, the angel she was. I complimented her all the time, became friendlier with her.

She worked as diligently as ever. But now, there was happiness around her when she worked. And I, as always, loved watching her. I wanted to confess my feelings. By now, I didn't care about rejection. I just wanted to get the feelings out. "Sir?" Yet again, I snapped out of my thoughts.

"Yes, sweetheart?" I asked, smiling at her. "Have I got something on my face or are you lost in thoughts?" she chuckled, eyes shining with teasing affection. I admit, after seeing her break down and finally treating her nicely, Y/N and I grew closer. We talked outside work now and she had a lot of interesting things to tell me.

"You've got something on your face," I smiled, getting up. I sat in front of her on the floor; she loved sitting on floors for some reason. She said it was cold and she liked it. "What?" she frowned, touching her face. "Beauty," I whispered and she froze. She looked at me.

"Sir, I—"

"I'm just gonna say it, Y/N, I'm in love with you."

"Then why did you treat me like I was nothing?"

"Because I didn't want any distraction from my work. You were the biggest distraction ever, with a beauty like that."

"What do you mean?"

"I thought that maybe by treating you coldly the feelings would go away. But they grew. And now I realize, my work is actually the biggest distraction from you." She chuckled at my joke. I took her hand and pressed a kiss to it. "Please tell me you like me back, I won't be able to sleep at night," I whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. She grinned and tittered.

"Of course I do, I love you so much, sir," she whispered and I finally, after months of pining, pressed my lips to hers. She kissed back. My hands moved to her waist and I brought her on my lap, leaning against the wall behind me as we kissed passionately.

"Tell me you're mine, no one else's."

"Of course I'm yours, sir."

"Gah, you have no idea what that word does to me."

She found out that night.

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A/N: Oop. Leave a like if you liked it lol

#stephen strange x reader #stephen strange x you #stephen strange x y/n #stephen strange x female reader #stephen vincent strange #stephen strange fluff #doctor strange #benedict cumberbatch characters #disney #marvel #mcu #avengers #fanfic #writing #writeblr