Hawkeye: So what do I do about incredibly average Vernon Parsons?
Colonel Potter: Relax. Let him have his little research grant. Live and let live. And then just to give yourself a little present, send him an anonymous letter.
Hawkeye: That's not a bad idea. I could tell him I saw him cheating on an exam once.
Potter: Tell him you're filing a malpractice suit.
Hawkeye: I'm beginning to feel better.
Potter: Tell him you're filing a paternity suit.
Hawkeye: [Laughing.]
The number of pregnancy jokes Hawkeye makes abour himself has been noted many times, and honoured in fanfic, but how often does anyone make a joke to Hawkeye about him getting pregnant? Potter, in the fifth season episode "Hepatitis", while feeding Hawkeye fig newtons and whisky.
Awesome.
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Cannot believe mustang thought this shit would work.
[Image ID: Roy Mustang from Fullmetal alchemist is standing before Edward Elric and Alphonse Elric. He is saying "Yeah we sent Maes to live on a farm in Xing. A farm with lots of land. and homunculi for him to chase all he wants." with a guilty expression. Riza Hawkeye stands slightly behind him giving him an exasperated expression. /.End ID]
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Can't believe there's a whole episode of MASH where Hawkeye just talks at a Korean family for thirty minutes
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i just have to believe hawkeye’s limbs are too long for him . i believe he has constant bruises on his legs from walking into desk corners and he stumps his feet on doorframes . i believe he consistently misses the last step when going down the stairs . i believe sometimes he raises his hand to do his little wave and accidentally thumbs himself in the eye . i believe he trips over his own feet and lands full - length .
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Love fics where Clint meets Matt while he is daredevil and Clint uses signs or just sign language to communicate but daredevil (in his pov) is so rude and ableist bc he ignores him so Clint thinks it's because daredevil doesn't like that he is deaf when in reality Matt is just under the mask panicking bc hawkeye isn't speaking, he can hear vague movements of hands but he doesn't know why
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[image id: two digital drawings, fanart of the sitcom show Mash. one is a portrait of hawkeye pierce. the other is a short comic of hawkeye and trapper laughing uproariously, then frank and margaret looking frustrated. at the end it reads "and then hawk and trap got arrested." end id]
mash doodles from tonight
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be it a black comedy or a workplace comedy or a satire or a dramedy, MASH is first and foremost a comedy. MASH needs to be a comedy. the point being made is that setting a comedy during a horrific and pointless war is absurd. point being that the war is horrific and pointless and absurd.
hence much of the dialogue in the early years, such as this bit from hawkeye in the pilot episode "throw away all the guns and invite all the jokers from the North and the South in here to a cocktail party. last man standing on his feet at the end wins the war". the Henry Blake character and on the flip side of Henry, the Frank Burns character and some of the others seem absurd and over-the-top because you're meant to ask yourself "how did a guy like henry end up in command??" or "how does a hack doctor like frank end up a major and constantly escape any formal consequences?".
this scene is hilarious - but it's also functionally anti-establishment. it's meant to drive home how stupid the whole thing is. hawkeye spells it out later in the scene, saying something like "if you wanna talk medical procedures, fine, let's talk. otherwise, this is a waste of time and if you're gonna make me be here i'm going to be as silly as disruptive as possible". and then he and trapper do just that, manipulating the "rules of order" which bring structure to the staff meeting, so that they become rules of disorder, and the meeting quickly devolves into chaos as the laugh track plays.
it seems obvious that a show about war would be gritty, tragic and at points, hard to watch. MASH also has those moments, and they easily convey that war and any attempts we make to justify war, are bizarre and hellish and immoral. the funny moments are doing the same thing, in a more unexpected way.
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no one laughs at god in a hospital, no one laughs at god in a war
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quick!! whats hawkeye pierce's gender and where is he from??
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