Something something you stop by Neuvillette's office to bring him something and have a quick visit and the second you leave, a sun shower starts up.
Slowly at first, as if the sky itself is hesitant to let the rain fall before it opens up completely. Rain lines the streets with gold and clings to fresh flowers sitting in open stalls. A few citizens seek shelter under awnings and cafe umbrellas; one couple braves the rain and laughs on their stroll.
This rain is warm. Welcoming. Unlike the cold, unforgiving rain that follows an evening trial.
It's an embrace; a realization and a confession rolled up in one, heavy, cloudless rain.
One that you just haven't figured out yet.
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Currently obsessed with the thought that it's Q who won't promise monogamy to Bond. He doesn't say it to be cruel. He likes Bond very much. He genuinely enjoys his company over dinner and a glass of wine, which is far more than he can say for many of the men he's slept with. In fact, it's much more than that. Apart from having shagged a couple of times, they've become close friends too.
It's just that with Q's schedule, he's never been very good at long-term committed relationships. His work life has always been too busy for all that. He works odd hours and long shifts, and it's been impossible to make anything monogamous stick. Besides, Bond is out in the field most of the time. He sleeps with other people for work and he has a ridiculously high sex drive for a man his age (speed will do that to you). It's not always going to be possible for Q to meet his needs.
And Bond knows all of that is true. They see each other infrequently as it is. It would hardly be fair of him to cat around while Q remained a saint. Why shouldn't he go on a date and have a good time while Bond is out of the country? Q's there at the drop of a hat whenever Bond needs him--really needs him--so what's the matter with him getting his needs met when Bond's busy? Nothing.
That's what he tells Q, anyway, the minute Q mentions a date.
("Is that a problem?" Q asks, his brow furrowed.
"Of course not," replies Bond gently.)
Except there is a problem. A huge one, as Bond finds out months later, watching Q head off from MI6 on his third date in about six months. Because it stings. Bond has no right to be jealous. He'd slept with 008 in Tokyo only a few nights ago. It was good sex, but it was just sex. He wonders what Q is like when he's with other people; what the sex is like. Is it just sex? Or is it more than that? Does he feel a similar sting when he sees Bond with someone in the field?
Bond doesn't know why he's cursed with wanting monogamy when his life makes it impossible, but it's bloody infuriating that he does.
And it's also bloody infuriating he's managed to fall for a man who doesn't want a bar of it.
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I am:
done exams (AT LONG LAST)
sleep-deprived but slowly paying back that sleep debt :)
truly blessed by the friends here at the dorm
still tired lol but not exhausted anymore
still horribly, horribly heartbroken despite the good ending of that arc and despite still being friends with him!
still have no idea how to move on :')
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