#he hated what little he understood and he was mad that god left everyone else to clean up his messes

[888sss]

Words he never said

Soo I never write, but I was about to go to sleep, and this popped into my head, so I thought I'd write about it. Also, I'm not new to Tumblr, but this is my first ever fic so pls don't judge. (not grammar checked)

1068 Words / 6 minutes estimated reading time

Four (Tobias Eaton) x reader

The last test of my fear simulation was over. I jumped out of the chair I lay on, and blink a few times trying to adjust to the bright light hitting my eyes. The echo of people clapping erupted from all corners of the room, and as I finally took a step and could actually look around, I saw Four standing off to my left. My head turned and he was smiling as he walked over.

He came over and reached out his arms for what I understood to be a hug, so I took a few more steps toward him, but he went around me. He passed me to go hug Tris. I saw as he effortlessly picked her up and spun her around, and when he placed her down he gave her a kiss on her forehead, as she started telling him God knows what.

I love Tris, she's my sister, but of course, she would be the one to replace me, for what only felt like the hundredth time ever. I wasn't mad at Tris though, I was furious as Four. He was the one who told me to keep things private.

"Private, but not secret."

I remember the words he said to me. The words he promised me, while we lay tangled in his sheets, discussing what label we wanted to put on ourselves.

"Four! What the hell?" I aggressively pushed past Tris to get to him.

"Oh no, here comes your shadow." Tris taunted, and I shot a glare at her.

"Y/n, your simulation went better than I expected!" Four said with a sarcastic tone behind it.

"Don't avoid the ques- wait what?" I started to process what he was inferring with his remark. "What do you mean, 'better than you expected'?" I asked as I took a step closer to him, with an insulted look on my face.

"I mean you did better than what I thought you could do, based off of how horrible most of your other abilities are. Not to mention you have possibly the most forgettable personality, and you always complain about 'What if I don't make the cut?', 'What if everyone thinks I want to be like Tris?', 'What if everyone thinks I'm lame?', but what you don't understand, y/n is that we all already think that."

I felt the room get a little smaller, and everyone was so silent you could hear a feather fall. All of a sudden applause burst out from the people in the room, surrounding the three of us, and seemingly agreeing with what Four said.

I stood there, in shock, jaw dropped, waiting for him to say he was just kidding, or for me to just drop dead.

I confided in Four, I trusted in Four, and I would argue I loved him. I told him the 3 things I hated the most.

Public degradation, Being yelled at, and being compared to Tris.

Somehow he had managed to have done all 3 of those things in a matter of seconds.

"Four.. say you don't mean it." I felt tears rolling down my cheeks, and off my chin. I'm not sure when I started crying, but now I was more upset, that he had to have gotten the response he wanted from me. Why else would he say those things.

"Four." My voice was weak, but his stare was strong and cold. He looked me up and down, before turning around.

"Pathetic." He managed to say just loud enough for me to hear, as his back was turned, and he walked away.

I lost him in the crowd in a matter of seconds as I decided I needed to calm down before more people can see that I'm crying. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths, and focused on the feeling of the cold air of the room against my tear-stained cheeks.

I opened my eyes, and there I was, back in the chair, in the middle of the normal-sized room.

Again I was blinded by the lights and tried to blink them away. They were brighter than they were the first time. People began clapping again, and before I could even take a step off of the chair I was laid in, Four had reached me and took my hands in his.

"Y/n, I would never betray you like that." He was trying to look me in the eyes, but I avoided his gaze. He lifted one of his hands to make me look at him. When my eyes met his he smiled and I opened my mouth to talk, but he hurried and put a finger over my mouth.

"Y/n, I don't want you to be scared to tell me things, I care for you very much..."

I was getting Deja Vu. Not the kind that's like been there done that, but the kind of Deja Vu, that leaves you with the same empty mysterious feeling of nothing in the pit of your stomach. I remembered when I told Four I loved him, and his response was, "Thank you for loving me", that was enough for me to understand he wasn't ready yet, but now it had been almost a year, and he still couldn't say the words.

"Four I know, it's okay, I don't want to force you to say things you don't mean." I looked at him with a peaceful rage in my eyes, hurt he couldn't say the words, and upset he wasn't as committed to me as I was to him.

He tilted his head to the side with an offended look on his face, "Don't do that y/n, you can't do that. Don't push me away, not now." He looked at me with sadness in his eyes. "Not now, not ever." He was begging at this point.

"Why? Why not now?" I was confused by his sudden specificity in time.

Four grabbed my hands again, as he leaned in to place his lips on mine. I wanted to resist because I was angry at him, he wasn't committed, he didn't care. But I could hear him reassuring me. He wasn't speaking out loud, but he was speaking to me. He broke the kiss, and rested his forehead on mine, taking a breath.

"Because I love you."

#divergent #tobias eaton #four eaton #divergentfour #theo james #tobias eaton x reader #angst #divergent angst #love confession #tris prior #tobias eaton x prior!sister

[faggotmox]

I'm cheating at the enemies to lovers prompts: i want mox bridging the gap between Eddie and Bryan (or Claudio) where both Eddie and Bryan are pissed but Moxy just wants his boys all together: of course you do

meme i lost || @philosophyofhedonism

this is the closest thing to a madmox break up i will ever write. feel like this is set up a bit to make eddie the bad guy but i wanna be clear that’s def not what im trying to imply. this would be after many conversations, & shit. like this is the result of eddie continuing to hurt mox by being a bitch about bryan & claudio even though he pretty much knows he’s doing it. but eddie’s insecure & needed it pointed out. this ones got a little lost in the sauce & im not happy with the ending. here ya go lmao. this leads to the bridge being built.

#. Of course you do. [Mox/Eddie, Mox/Bryan/Claudio]

warnings: angst, so much angst, kind of a breakup fic, cursing, two people struggling lol

"I gotta problem with them! You know that!" Eddie growled, loud and over infused with anger. As always with this fight.

"Of course you do!" Mox was ready to rip his hair out, his hand anxiously running through his hair. "Of fucking course you do!"

"You know damn well anyone else wouldn'--"

"Shut the fuck up, Eddie!" Mox snapped. Finally fucking snapped. "Of fucking course you gotta problem with Bryan. He's a dick. He judges people. So do fuckin' you. You're a huge asshole, you judge everyone you see. And what happened with you and Claudio is so fuckin' old I don't even know if I was an adult when y'all had your falling out! He's changed. He's grown the fuck up and he regrets leaving you like that, man, but he can't fucking do shit about it because you're a fucking asshole. Of course you have a problem. Of course you do. You're made of god damn problems, Eddie! I love you. I love you more than I love anything else, Eddie, I swear to god. I swear on my mother, Eddie. But this bullshit...I can't keep doing it."

Eddie watched Mox pop off. Normally he would interject, stop Mox when he called him a dick or something. But there was a look on Mox's face that said if Eddie interrupted then it could be a heavier straw than either thought. Instead Eddie watched Mox frantically get the words out, like he couldn't breathe with them still in his chest. Like this was a long time coming and Eddie should have known, should have seen that he was suffocating Mox.

"You said--" Mox threw his hands up. "You said, Eddie. You agreed to this. When we got back together you were cool with me dating other people, having more relationships. But the second I'm with someone you have a distaste for I'm left-- I'm left--" Mox shakes his head, trying to get himself on track. "I love Bryan, man. I love the way he wrestles, the way he cooks dinner like he's building a fucking bomb, the way he holds me from behind and sticks his head under my arm. He fucking figured out some soap that doesn't give me dry skin. He listens to me when I can't put things into words. Eddie, I love him like I love you and that's why you fucking hate him." Mox finally stopped moving and was looking at Eddie with hard eyes. It wasn't normal for them to call each other on the deep bullshit. They had their walls and guards up for reasons. Mox understood that but he couldn't keep it up anymore. His walls came down and he had to break some of Eddie's too. "And you know how easy it is to fall for Claudio, huh? Don’t ya? So you're mad that I'm gonna love him too."

"Mox, look, I'm sorry I--" Eddie started to step forward but Mox stepped back quicker.

"Nah, man. You're scared, and you're being a bitch about it. You could just tell me, talk to me! You're insecure and you think I'm gonna leave you because Bryan and Claudio are something you're not." Mox growled. "I can't do it. If you don't want me dating them then we have to have to a serious fucking conversation about our boundaries, and I fucking hate you for making me have to talk like some fucking asshole. Boundaries." Mox scoffed at himself. "We've always been straight up with each other, man. That's what I expect from you. You just hide behind your fucking quips, and make snide remarks about a dude I love. That ain't fair to me, Eddie. You lied when you told me you were cool with this."

"...You're right."  Eddie nodded, his eyes on his boots as he stood with the weight of it on his shoulders. He fucked up. "You're fuckin' right."

"Hey." Mox was suddenly very close, his hand on Eddie's shoulder then sliding to rest on the back of Eddie's neck. "Need you to look at me, Bear." Mox whispered, his private nickname for Eddie never sounded so sad.

"Don't call me that right now, Moxie." Eddie looked up, meeting eyes with his partner to the harsh reality he knew was coming his way. "Not right now. Fuck."

"You know I love you right, Bear? I need to know that you know." Mox had water obscuring his blue eyes, threatening to become tears. "I love you."

"You love me, Jon. Of course you do." Eddie nodded. Their foreheads met and Eddie just knew the next words out of Mox's mouth would destroy his entire world and he would just have to accept it.

"I need a break from this, Bear." Mox finally said it and Eddie felt like he'd shatter. No one had that power over him but Mox. "I need a break from you."

"Of course you do..." Eddie nodded, and slowly started to untangle himself from Mox.

Mox tried to hold on but Eddie pushed until they parted. It stung more knowing Mox didn't want to let go. They both learned a long time ago about take care of themselves first, setting boundaries and walking away from the people that fucked them up the most. Eddie could still remember watching Mox chase after Rollins, the unhealthy obsession that Mox couldn't stop. Rollins was when Mox learned to step away, to pull himself back and make himself off limits to another person. Eddie had learned the same lesson from Claudio, but under different circumstances.

It all hit home when Mox's phone went off and Eddie could see the text from Bryan asking if Mox was okay. Why did Eddie hate Bryan so much? Why did he still hate Claudio? That was something he had to figure out because Mox couldn't take being the center of a war that wasn't even about him.  Eddie couldn't be an island anymore. It wasn't fair to Mox, and slowly as he gathered his bags he realized it wasn't fair to himself either. This had him twisted up, torturing himself like this wasn't it.

"We ain't breaking up." Mox's voice didn't sound as steady as he wanted it to sound. "I'd sooner lose everything else then lose you again, Bear."

"I know, sweetheart. We ain't breaking up." Eddie wanted to reassure Mox. "I'm not that easy to get rid of." Eddie winked and pretended he didn't feel a tear slip out.

"Of course you're not." Mox laughed harshly, shaking his head a little as Eddie was heading towards the door. There was something on Mox’s face, a fleeting look on his face that made Eddie smile a little.

“What?” Eddie stopped to watch Mox come a little closer. 

“Want a kiss before you go, Bear.” Mox admitted as they stepped a little closer to each other.

“Of course you do.” Eddie laughed a little as they got close enough.

They shared a soft kiss before Eddie had to peel himself away again. This time he got himself out before he could look at Mox again. It wasn’t their end, it couldn’t be, but Eddie was sore. He was hurt for the first time in a way that didn’t let him scorch the earth, even if it was his fault or not. Not only was this his own making but he had every tool to fix it. No drinking it away, no sleeping with whoever to get over Mox, no bullshit. Eddie had to figure his own shit out.

#we dont proof #i dont even know what i wrote tbh #jon moxley #Eddie Kingston #jon moxley x eddie kingston #jon moxley x bryan danielson #claudio castagnoli x jon moxley #wrestling fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #angst

[jjongleurs]

Sam grew up loving books and being a smart kid because Dean read him stories every night.

Even before he knew how to read, Dean would pick up tattered motel Bibles and make up stories to tell baby Sammy to pass the time while they waited for John to come back from whatever hunt he'd run off to. Dean remembered a time when his mom (and John on rare occasion) would sit on the edge of his bef and wrap an arm around him and read from big books with colorful pictures. He would make the funny voices like his mom did and he never said no (the way she never said no, but John did) when he asked for another story.

Sam loved it, little as he was. Dean did too. It was a comfort, a little piece of the life he lived before.

Once Dean had learned to read, he'd tell little Sammy about the books they read at whatever school John put him in for the week. He'd borrow books from the little classroom library to read to him before bed, fully intending to return them the next day (because this was when Dean still hoped that John would pick somewhere and they would stay). Of course, he wasn't able to always bring them back. This is how Dean began amassing Sam's little library.

Over the years, he collected books like The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings (they accidentally read the series out of order), The Outsiders, Of Mice and Men, The Great Gatsby, To Kill a Mockingbird, Beowulf, Romeo and Juliet, Lord of the Flies, Dracula, The Odyssey, Frankenstein, and so many more—mostly, they were books that were assigned in Dean's classes (some were gifts from Bobby). Especially when Sammy had already started school. By the time Sam was half way through elementary school, he had grown bored because he already knew most of the stories. Dean had already read them to him. Sam craved more, so he'd read from what had been assigned.

Sam didn't need Dean to read to him by the time he started middle school, but their routine stayed the same, more or less. John did sour things one night when he glared daggers through the rearview mirror of the Impala at Dean, sat in the back seat with Sam, reading in whispers by flashlight, and said that they were both too old for bedtime stories, told them to make themselves useful and pick up a lore book if they wanted to read so badly.

Dean's reading tapered off from there (around the time he was 14) becoming less and less as John pulled him out of school more and more often for hunts. Sam continued to inhale books at an even faster rate, picking up fantasy and fiction novels from the school libraries on top of the lore books that he had actually come to enjoy reading.

Dean was the one who bought Sam copies of the Harry Potter books as they were released from whatever he could scrounge up (odd jobs, hustling pool, etc). Bobby also continued to give Sam heaps of books and even had a whole bookshelf in his house dedicated to Sam's books. Sam stashed most of them there, but always carried a few favorites with him.

Sam never told anyone, but this is one of the things he wrote about for his college essays. Earned him a scholarship even. Despite the hardships in his life, Sam always had his brother and the love of knowledge Dean imparted on him as a constant.

#dean winchester #sam winchester #supernatural #spn #spn headcanon #also as soon as dean was able to understand some of the bible he never picked one up again #he hated what little he understood and he was mad that god left everyone else to clean up his messes #he lost what little faith he had very early on #he also learned that hope was a dangerous thing #and that there were no angels watching over him despite what his mom always told him #BUT THERE WERE #*cue me sobbing over Cas in thr future* #aria rambles #rewatch rambles #aria tries to write

[biisexualemma]

boys ain't shit. oscar diaz

word count: 2.2k

warnings: swearing, lots of just angst and angry feminist energy and if this doesn't align with your beliefs, feel free to leave!

requested: 'Hey!! First I want to say that you are an amazing writer so talented! So I was wondering if I could request and imagine with spookyxreader and she overhears Oscar speaking about her or something like maybe she is to clingy or anything you think will fit and then she sort of starts to leave him alone does t opposite of what she heard he doesn't like drifts a little he sees the change questions her and she tells him why- and so angst to fluff If you hate please disregard And thanks anyway ❤️'

a/n: thank you for this lovely request, i only apologise that it took me so long to write! but i'm also glad it did because i kept re-writing this over and over again and it never came out right, but i really love this version! i changed it slightly from the request lol i was listening to 'your power' by billie eilish on a loop while writing this and a lot of anger and preaching came out-- oop-- but also not mad about it. i really like this and hope you do too! enjoy 🤍

on my block masterlist / main masterlist

anger bubbled in your chest but your cheeks were flushed pink with embarrassment. your stomach lurched, a mixture of emotions swirling through you. you were angry at him for being such an asshole, but mostly you were embarrassed that you'd found yourself in this position and hurt that he would think to treat you like this. he was an asshole, he always had been, you knew it before you started dating but, somehow, he still managed to worm his way in. mainly because when you were alone he was careful, and sweet, and kind. he cared about you, he told you any chance he got, and you believed him. you were always convinced he meant everything he said, which is why this stung all the more.

"nah, it ain't even like that— she's everywhere man, how you s'posed to shake a hyna like that?" their laughter rang through your ears as you stood, feet frozen in place, out of sight to them. "shit's ridiculous. she's always on top of me."

"man— if i had a hyna that fine on top o' me all the time—"

"the things i'd do—"

you shook your head, blocking out their vulgar comments and trying to rid of oscar's shrewd laughter filling your ears. you were sick to your stomach hearing him talk about you like that, to hear him encouraging his friends crude jokes about you.

you couldn't stop yourself as the small scoff left your lips, catching one of the boys' attention. sad eyes, his smile faltering when he spotted you tucked around the side of the house, listening to every word. "shit," you heard him mumble, nudging oscar whose back was facing you.

oscar always had a thing about keeping up his reputation, which you understood, to some extent, but this had nothing to do with that. this was his friends, talking about you as if you were an object to satisfy their needs. and he was encouraging them. this was you they were talking about, when he claimed to love you.

this wasn't a side to oscar you ever wanted to see, or believe existed. you knew how his friends could be, but to hear him condoning the shit coming out of his friends mouths, made you feel unbelievably uncomfortable.

not to even mention that he was being downright mean, and sleazy in talking about you. you could feel your anger growing the longer you stood there. oscar glanced over his shoulder, his face falling when his eyes met yours. your hands clenched into fists, biting down on the inside of your cheek.

you shook your head, finally knocked out of your state of shock, turning and stomping away from the group of santos. your breathing grew heavier, sweat dripping off you as the sweltering heat started to get to you. you were so angry you could cry. you trusted oscar with everything, it took you a long time to get to that point, and this is how he treated you.

you could hear his muffled calls from behind you getting louder as you continued to march away from the house. you yanked your wrist away when you felt his hand latch onto you, and carried on your walk home.

he sped up, jogging so he stopped dead in front of you, holding out his hands when you tried to manoeuvre around him. "i don't wanna talk to you right now," you spoke calmly, trying again to move past him, his hands latching onto your shoulders to keep you still.

"just— hang on will you—"

you shook your head repeatedly. "no—"

"i don't know what you heard but—" his grip tightened when you tried to wriggle free.

"no," you repeated harsher.

"y/n— c'mon— that was nothing—"

"oscar," you raised your voice, cutting off his ramblings. his eyes never left your face, his eyebrows unknitting when your frown deepened. he scrunched his eyes shut for a second, frustrated he'd upset you. he was annoyed with himself for being so stupid. "no," you repeated once more. his hands slowly released their grip on you, letting you walk passed him. you heard his curse under his breath, walking away from him.

you felt your lip quiver, a lump now growing in your throat as your anger turned into heartache. you weren't sure you wanted to forgive him. but, for now at least, you were going to give him exactly what he wanted. space.

-

hours later and you were stood in the middle of a crowded party, your teeth clenched around the rim of a red solo cup, biting nervously. you hadn't wanted to come, you would much rather have been at home with a pint of ice cream. but your friend convinced you that getting out of the house tonight would be better for you than wasting away your life thinking about boys and eating ice cream. so far, you weren't so sure she was right.

you'd lost count the amount of times you'd heard loosen up and, you should smile more, thrown at you tonight. you weren't in the right headspace to be surrounded by people who were drunk out of their mind, constantly telling you to cheer up. you wanted to shout out to the entire party, fuck off, so everyone would know to just leave you alone.

so when you spotted his familiar face across the room, having just entered the party, you almost lost it. "no," you muttered to yourself. "not happening," you shook your head. he had been exactly what you came here to get away from. you let out frustrated sigh, shoving your cup into your friends hand and pushing yourself out of the crowd of people.

you hoped to god that oscar hadn't spotted you. you could not hash this out with him right now, that pint of ice cream in your freezer at home was calling your name, and you were ready to claim it.

"fuck me," you felt a hand graze the small of your back. you shivered away from the unwanted touch, turning with a deep-set frown on your face, towards the stranger who'd touched you. "you're hot when you're angry like that—"

"i'm also a fucking psycho when i'm angry so back off," you spat harshly, pushing away the hand he held lingering on your skin. "and don't touch me again," the man backed up, his hands held up in front of him. you huffed, continuing to the exit.

you wrapped your arms around yourself as the cool night air hit your bare skin. you'd left your jacket inside, turning to retrieve it, you saw oscar walking right at you. deciding it wasn't worth the effort, you left, you'd rather freeze than have a conversation with him right now.

"i know you hate me," you heard him call from behind you, his pace quickening as he tried to catch up with you. "but you can't walk home by yourself."

you ignored him, hastening your walk so you didn't have to do this with him. you knew he was right, you knew how incautious you were being walking home late at night alone. but you also desperately wanted nothing to do with him right now.

"ma," you shook your head, trying not to lose it on him in the middle of the street. "c'mon—"

"no— you c'mon oscar," you halted your stride, not able to ignore him any longer. you might as well get it out of your system if he was going to keep persisting. "i have had it with men today. i never wanted to have to include you in that."

he ducked his head, a crease forming between his eyebrows you noticed now you'd stopped to look over him. his eyes rolled, letting out a heavy sigh he'd clearly been holding in for a while.

"c'mon," he tilted his gaze away from yours for a second, trying not to cave under your stare. "you know what the santos are like— it's not my job to keep 'em in check."

"it is when it's me they're talking about," you gritted your teeth, looking at him in disbelief. you'd expected that this was how the conversation was going to go down. which is exactly why you tried to avoid it, you simply didn't have the energy to stand here and explain basic human decency to him. "not to mention— it is literally your job. you run the santos."

"it's not that simple," he ran his hand over his face, taking a small step closer to you. his eyes meeting with yours, begging you not to run off again as he held out a cautious hand towards you. "they didn't mean anythin' by what they said— you think if they did i'd let them 'in an inch of you?"

"you're perpetuating a violent cycle of sexism and objectification by letting your friends talk about any girl like that," you felt your throat tighten, tears had, at some point, welled in your eyes. "and that's not even mentioning what you said about me."

he closed his eyes for a second, his hand dropping back to his side. he turned away from you for a moment, releasing a deep breath he'd been holding. "i didn't mean it," he shook his head, swinging round to face you again. his brown eyes, that you'd always been a sucker for, were literally boring into you. if you hadn't been so angry you would've done anything for him. "i wasn't thinking and i never thought you'd ever hear—"

"that makes it ok then?" you frowned, eyes narrowing at him. "god knows what else you've said about me when i haven't been around to hear it," you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest, trying to keep up your appearance despite the tears threatening to fall.

"s'not what i meant," he threw is arms up in frustration. he had, in all honesty, been talking without thinking about what he was saying. he was tired and stressed about how stretched out his time was at the moment. he was taking on more and more work, and therefore, more and more stress and he wasn't dealing with it well. he clenched his jaw when you sniffled, wiping under your nose with the back of your hand. his eyelids drooped. "nena.."

"i just, don't get it," you let out a shaky breath, holding out your hands to stop him moving any closer to you. "if i was being too much, all you had to do was say."

his chest tightened hearing you talk about yourself like that. he shook his head, trying again to reach out to you but you only stepped further away. "you're not too much," he spoke quieter this time. oscar loved you, more than he'd ever loved a girl before, that much was true. he might be bad at showing it sometimes, maybe he let his frustration get the better of him a lot, and maybe he didn't simply tell you enough how much you meant to him. but he loved you, much more than you were aware of.

"then why would you say it?" your voice was soft, breaking when you spoke again. exhaustion was starting to get the better of the both of you. you didn't want to fight with him, you just couldn't get his words out of your head. why would he say it if he didn't mean it?

"it's not you," he reiterated, his lips pursed. he used his forefinger and thumb to unknit the crease between his brows. "it's everything else. with cesar fucking around, shit with the prophets, cuchillos— and then you," he ducked his head, pressing the palm of his hand into his forehead. "i don't know how to manage everything and make time for you."

"why didn't you just tell me?" your features softened, eyes watching him move under your stare. "it's what i'm here for."

he scrunched up his nose, shrugging. "i don't want you involved in santos business," you understood more than you did five minutes ago, but you were still holding yourself back.

"i'm already involved, oscar, it's too late for that," this caught his attention, his brown eyes focused on yours again. you weakened a little. "but if you would just talk to me instead of keeping everything to yourself, maybe we wouldn't be in this situation right now."

he nodded faintly, almost uncertain of where you were taking this conversation. last thing he wanted was to lose you because of something so stupid on his end. he reached out, you letting him come close enough now so he could take hold of your hands in his. he gave your hand a gentle squeeze, tugging you closer.

"you know, i love you," you mumbled now he was only inches away from you. "i don't wanna do this again so talk to me, please."

he nodded again, giving your hand another squeeze of reassurance. "i'll try," the way his brown eyes stuck to you made you believe he meant what he said. "i'll do better. promise. i'll keep the santos in check, too. you don't need to worry."

you sunk into his chest, letting him engulf you in a tight hug. you released a shaky breath of relief. his arms wrapped around you, your face squashed against his chest and your arms tightened around his torso. "love you, too, by the way," he mumbled, his mouth pressed into your head of hair. "so much."

#oscar diaz #spooky diaz #on my block #on my block imagine #oscar diaz imagine #oscar diaz one shot #oscar diaz fanfiction #oscar diaz fic #spooky #spooky diaz imagine #spooky diaz x you #spooky diaz x reader #on my block netflix #julio macias #oscar diaz x you #oscar diaz x reader #on my block season 4 #on my block fic #on my block x reader #on my block fanfiction #omb imagine #omb #omb one shot #omb masterlist #on my block masterlist #masterlist #one shot #imagine #reader

[feliix]

Perfect Score ↠ Han Jisung

↠ Jisung x Reader (feat. Felix)

↠ Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Fake Dating!AU, Childhood Friends to Lovers

↠ Rating: M (18+)

↠ Word Count: 14.9k

↠ Summary: As you return home to work at your local coffee shop, you’re swarmed with couples coming in on lovey-dovey on dates. You’ve always hated the idea of love, but it’s Jisung’s mission to make you change your mind in just two weeks time.

↠ Warnings: idiots 2 lovers, mutual pining, unprotected sex, fingering, soft sex, language, light mentions of marking, mentions of bad past relationships

“That's disgusting.”

You grimace in the most subtle way as you watch the man across the shop press a gentle kiss on the cheek of the woman next to him. For some reason your shop is packed with couples this evening. Not that you’ve been counting, but they’re probably the 50th overly lovey-dovey pair that you’ve seen this just this shift alone. 

To say ‘love’ isn’t really your thing isn’t too far from the truth. Every time you’ve been burned by someone in the past has only made your hope about love deteriorate. Relationships suck. Already been there, done that, and you don’t plan on doing it again.

You’ve always stuck by the same theory; relationships either lead to heartbreak or marriage. And even still, marriage may still end in heartbreak, so what’s the point?

“Stop being so dramatic,” Jisung laughs, pulling you out of your thoughts as he rounds the corner. He’s just in time to catch your snide remark, surely it won’t be the last one you’ll make tonight though. He had just run to the back to get you a fresh package of cups after using up all the stock in the front.

Tonight is busy to say the least. The sun has already set, and it’s the afternoon rush when everyone comes in for their second daily dose of caffeine. And it’s definitely necessary – especially on a day as hot and exhausting as this one. It’s the third day that its been over 100º in a row and the humidity is doing a real number to your hair.

“It’s not dramatic,” you sigh, leaning on the counter behind you as Jisung maneuvers around you, placing the cups on the shelf underneath. In your mind it absolutely isnt. Its a mystery why all these people need to publicly display their affection in a coffee shop anyway...

It’s just the two of you on the schedule tonight. Your boss has always been kind of an asshole, just leaving 2 kids in their early twenties to run the shop by themselves while he went off to do god knows what. There's always been an aching suspicion that he just goes to the bar across the street, since his car is still parked behind the shop but he’s always nowhere to be found. That’s okay though, it's better than him looming over your shoulder and criticizing your technique the whole shift.

“Yeah, whatever you say,” Jisung shakes his head.

In stark contrast to yourself, Han Jisung is quite the hopeless romantic. So much so that he tends to search for love in all the wrong places. Maybe a better way to describe it is that Jisung has a series of flings. He’s not shy to test the waters of any girl he comes across – and there are many, many waters that he’s tested. Lucky you gets to hear all about each one, being his friend and all.

But to your good friend’s demise, his ‘relationships’ never end up working out for very long. Theres always some kind of fatal flaw that’s a means to an end. Whether it was Jisung’s fault or the girls,  it’s always confused you why he could never hold onto something longer than a couple months. Jisung is a great guy, it didn’t make sense.

So great that you have been best friends with him for as long as you could remember. It all started that time in pre-k, where you poured a shovel of sand on his head in the sandbox. Initially, it did make him cry, but he got over it eventually. Ever since, he’s been right by your side, sandy hair and all.

“How much longer,” your eyes roll back in your head, neglecting to look at the watch on your wrist in fear that your shift has a significant amount of time left. The night has been dragging on since you stepped foot in the door and heard the little jingle as it opened. You wouldn’t be surprised if you’d only made it through half your shift thus far.

“Just under an hour. Want to start the closing checklist so we can get outta here?” Jisung offers, reaching for the rag and sanitation bucket at the end of the counter.

Nodding your head, you follow his plan – beginning your mission to clean like a speed demon so you can leave no later than at 8 o’clock on the dot. 

Luckily, closing tonight goes as smoothly as it possibly can. You and Jisung are ready to get out of there at 8 on the dot, thanks to your determination to mop like a mad woman and stock the front as fast as humanly possible. 

The air outside feels crisper than usual. Maybe its because you’ve been locked up in a small room that smells like coffee beans for 10 hours, but you’ll never get enough of the night air. 

“So what are we doing tonight?”Jisung asks, his fingers adjusting the headband that sits just above his forehead.

“I was planning on going home and getting some rest…” you trail off, avoiding eye contact with him. Jisung always goes out after your weekend shifts and never lets up on convincing you to tag along. So you can’t look at him, his eyes are much too convincing make contact with, and you are beyond exhausted from working a double today.

“Gah you’re so boring,” he teases, stopping in his tracks in the center of the parking lot to ruffle the hair on top of your head, “it was an early night we should do something.”

With a deep sigh, you stop as well, smoothing down your hair as a pout forms on your lips. The suggestive smirk settling across Jisung’s face is telling; he knows he’s about to get his way before you have the chance to turn him down or fish for another excuse. So you tilt your head, subtly rolling your eyes as you wait for him to explain what his big plans for tonight are.

“I’ll be at your house by 9.”

Accepting defeat, you shoot him a thumbs up before turning to get into your car. Asking any more questions would take away any time you had to wash up – and smelling like coffee beans any longer is going to drive you up a wall since it hasn't already.

It doesn’t take much time for you to rush home and get ready, and before you know it Jisung is there to pick you up. Only a few minutes late, but that’s just par for the course and right on time in Jisung terms. 

The car ride to your destination feels like a blur with how exhausted you are. So when you end up at your favorite boba spot, you immediately perk up. Those tapioca pearls always manage to give you a second wind.

But when Jisung decides to take a seat at one of the round tables just outside the shop instead of getting back in the car you know somethings up. You were expecting to hop back in the passenger seat of his car, maybe listen to some music for a while and drive around to kill time. 

Initially he doesn’t say much. His legs just bounce hyperactively while he fidgits with the straw of his drink. It’s almost like he’s waiting for you to speak up; his eyes staring down at the cup in front of him instead of sipping from it, lip caught between his teeth.

The energy is off. Not only did you expect to hang out and do something adventurous like Jisung normally would, but now you’re watching his cheeks grow red while avoiding conversation.

Awkward silence becoming too much to bear, you take matters into your own hands. “So how are things going with that girl?”

“Oh yeah,” he sighs, his fingertips drumming along the surface of the table, “she didn’t really work out.”

Unsurprised by his response, you just nod along. Its always to expect since he’s the pickiest person you’ve ever met. His last relationship ended because he thought the girl breathed too loudly. The girl before that had an annoying laugh, and then the one before that didn’t like cheesecake. There always seems to be a laundry list of deal-breakers tied along to each one of Jisung’s relationships, and that is something you’ll always expect.

“You’re probably better off.”

You don’t think much of the words before they leave your lips. Relationships are a ton of work, and you’ve never understood the point of to putting all your effort into something like that. There is a way to just be happy on your own, you know.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” his eyebrows furrowing in response, hands gripping his thighs in anticipation

“You know what I think,” you tilt your heat matter-of-factly, “relationships are kind of just a waste of time.”

“What is with you and all this ‘anti-love’ stuff anyway, Y/N?”

Now thats a response that you are not prepared for. The question catches you off guard, a boba bubble almost catching in your throat leaving you a coughing mess. Jisung chuckles at your discomfort, waiting patiently for you to get it all out and just answer his question, as uncomfortable as it is. 

“I’ve wasted too much time with too many dead-beat guys to even think about love,” you sigh again, your coughing fit subsiding as you reach for your cup once again.

“Not every guy is a dead-beat.”

His words carry a harsh bite to them, almost as if he finds you’ve said offensive. It burns his ego a bit, assuming that you’re grouping him in with all the guys you’ve been with in the past. Which is strange, Jisung should know that he’s different. For one, you’ve never dated him before and two, if he was such a dead-beat you wouldn’t have kept him around for so long.

You aren’t able to talk to guys, or most people for that matter, in the same way that you talk to Jisung. He’s the one you rant about all the assholes to. He knows all the shit that you don’t tell anyone else, he’s like your own personal human diary. Secrets are always safe with him, it's not like he has anyone who would listen to the gossip even if he wanted to tell.

After a minute of silence his expression changes, Jisung’s eyes squinting at you in that ‘I have a crazy idea’ type of way. It’s a look that you haven’t seen very often, and you can’t say that you’ll ever get used to it. 

“Okay then I’ll make you a deal,” he proposes, a glimmering look in his eye that made you somewhat nervous. You never know what you are getting with Jisung, but most of the time his ‘deals’ are on the crazier side.

“What is it?” You still ask although you’re a bit nervous to hear his answer. If his plan is to set you up with one of his delinquent friends or something–

“Be my girlfriend.”

Your eyes widen as the words fall from his tongue, confusion taking over your expression as a small chuckle slips past his lips. Instinctively your stomach tightens, the air around you now feeling a bit heaver each second time ticks on. He can't be serious…

“Your what?”

“Two weeks is all I’m asking for. Be my girlfriend for just two weeks, and I’ll show you that love isn’t as shitty as you think it is.”

“You’ve gotta be kidding me” you shake your head, a disbelieving smile stretching wide across your face.

“C’mon Y/N,” he challenges, “it’s two weeks of your life, what else do you have to do? I think it could be fun.”

The quirk of his eyebrow and quick squint of his eyes grabs your attention. He’s serious about this, scarily serious, and you aren’t quite sure how to react to that.

“What’s in it for you?” Your chin falls into your palm as you stare at him, waiting for his response.

“Well for one,” he starts, a sigh leaving his lips, “if it works then I won’t have to listen to you complain about how much relationships suck anymore.”

Just when you don't think you can roll your eyes any further into the back of your head, your own actions surprise you. If looks could kill, the one you’re giving him right now would surely take him out. He doesn’t pay much mind to it though, he’s used to your sass and just shrugs it off.

“This is an awful idea,” you glare at him as if it will change his mind. You’re certain this experiment of his would not change your own. Love sucked, and that was that.

“Two weeks,” his voice carries a taunting tone, his eyebrows wiggling to entice you into his plan. He isn’t going to give up on this easily, you know Jisung. And Jisung always gets his way.

“Fine,” you huff, “two weeks and that’s it. And if my mind isn’t changed you owe me 3 more of these,” you say, picking up your boba from the table and shaking it at eye-level for emphasis.

His bottom lip catches between his teeth, satisfied with your response. He isn’t exactly sure how he’ll manage to pull this off, but he’s definitely up for the challenge.

“We start tomorrow at 8, I’ll pick you up after work.”

Crossing your arms over the table, you bury your head in your arms. This is going to be the most interesting two weeks of your entire life.

“Wait, you're like dating dating the Han Jisung?” Felix’s jaw drops, excitement prevalent on his face as you spill about your night with Jisung.

Felix is the only person in your life that understood your hatred for relationships, other than Jisung of course. Not that he shares the hatred himself, he’s just heard enough about how much you despise being in one to know just how you felt. He’s only heard about it every day for the past several summers.

Felix is your best friend, other than Jisung of course. He’s also the only person in this world that you could bear to work with on a Saturday morning. 

“That's the plan,” you sigh fiddling with the containers on the counter. It’s pretty slow for a Saturday morning, only a handful of customers have come in so far and it's already 11 am.

That’s the thing about working at a coffee shop – and it sucks when it's busy, and it sucks even more when it's slow. At least it isn't a terrible job, you at least have Jisung and Felix to keep you company and that's always worthwhile.

“And for the record,” you turn to look at Felix, a grin still evident on his face, “I don’t think this is gonna change my mind about the love stuff.”

“You know how Jisung is,” his eyebrow lifts, “so you never know. Maybe something could happen.” 

If anyone was surprised that you were dating someone, fake relationship or not, it would be Felix. On top of that, you’re dating Han Jisung. As in, the same Jisung that ended a 3-month relationship last year because the girl ‘smelled too much like peaches’ and it was ‘too good to be true.’ And now that you’re the one stuck with him for the next 14 days, it is only a matter of time until he finds the deal-breaking trait that turns him away from you.

“Okay no, that's exactly why this is only two weeks. If I know Jisung, he’ll be over it before the 2 weeks even ends.”

“Whatever you say,” the pitch of his voice is raised teasingly. You can tell he doesn’t believe this will be just a ‘two-week thing’ by the funny little look on his face. You hate that look, and you hate how Felix always seems to be right.

Subsequently Felix sees a lot of things that you aren’t able to see for yourself. You’ve grown up with Jisung, grown accustomed to his unique mannerisms and behaviors without even noticing. Felix, on the other hand, has a different point of view. 

He’s not in it like you are, so gets to see the way Jisung looks at you; the way he hangs on each and every word that leaves your mouth with a sparkle in his eye. He notices that Jisung longs to make you laugh. And he watches the toothy grin each that grows on your face each time a chuckle breaks through your lips. Felix notices every behavior that you see as nothing more than ‘friendly.’ But who is he to say? So, for now, the information remains tucked away and stored in his mind for a later date.

Your fingers drum on the clean marble countertop beside you, leaning against it as you wait for a customer to come in. All this time with nothing to do is really doing wonders for your imagination; thinking about what Jisung has planned for the two of you to do tonight. Nothing special, you hope, he really doesn’t need to go all out for this. 

The lack of customers and silence that's fallen among the shop is just making it easier for your mind to wander off. It was beginning to make you sick how much you were thinking about Jisung and nothing has even happened yet. It's not like you have any reason to be nervous, but keeping all these thoughts trapped in your thick skull is starting to give you a headache

“He’s picking me up after work.” You blurt it out without thinking much about it. No one is here, you might as well lay it all out there for Felix to know since there's nothing better to do.

“He’s picking you up? Like you’re going on a date?”

“Shut upppp,” your eyes roll at his teasing nature, growing slightly embarrassed by how giddy the thought of this ‘date’ is making him, and you for that matter. It’s just Jisung. And you are just hanging out like you do every other night. There's nothing different about tonight and you’ll be able to prove that to yourself and Felix by the next time you see him.

The rest of you shift flies by – it always does when you work with Felix. Before you know it, the closing checklist is coming to an end, only a few steps left before you can finally get out of here. The clock had just turned to 7:55 pm, but Jisung still isn’t here. Not that you’re expecting him to be on time or anything, this is still the same Jisung you have always known.

What you aren’t familiar with is the nervous butterflies fluttering around in your tummy as the clock approaches 8 pm.  What are you even nervous about? It isn’t a blind date, other than the fact that you have no idea what you’re doing. And it isn’t even a date. It’s Jisung for crying out loud.

Speaking of the devil, the chimes in the front of the shop ring as Jisung passes through the doorway. You don’t see who it is at first, your back turns to the door as you sweep behind the counter. The chimes ringing at this time of night do trigger your fight or flight instincts though, ready to turn to whoever is approaching and give them a dirty look for coming in this close to closing time.

But once you turn around and see Jisung standing in the doorway with a bouquet of sunflowers, your tension quickly subsides. You swear that you can feel your heart skip a beat, heat rising to your cheeks as you try your hardest to form a coherent sentence. It's okay that you aren’t able to, though, the surprised look on your face is enough for his smile to light up the room.

“I’m here to pick up the pretty girl with the espresso stain on her shirt,” he chuckles, his bottom lip catching between his teeth nervously.

Tonight he’s dressed a lot nicer than usual comfy attire; a nice shirt with a pair of dark jeans that hug his slim figure. His hair is a lot lighter too – a vast change from the midnight black strands that normally frame his face. He’s really going all out for this thing – and right now all that you’re wearing a pair of running shorts and a t-shirt with coffee stains down the front.

When you look to your right, Felix is just as stunned as you are. Frozen in his spot as his jaw practically sweeps the floor, he looks at you with wide eyes, his eyebrows raised as a smug expression crosses his face. For a second you contemplate asking him if he’s all set to finish the closing checklist on his own, but before you’re able to speak up he’s already shooing the two of you out the door.

With a goofy grin displayed across his face, Jisung hands you the bundle of flowers, tied together with a delicate white ribbon. You mumble a thank you, still stunned that he showed up here looking like that to take you out tonight. So he is the romantic type, note taken.

“You like nice,” you gulp nervously. It already feels like a date and you haven’t even left the parking lot yet. If this is how things are going to start you had an exciting 13 more days ahead of you...

“So do you,” he smirks, his eyes wandering down to the small brown stains littering your shirt. Eyes narrowing, you read the expression crossing his face – of course, he’s joking. “I brought you some fresh clothes to change into don’t worry.”

Relief rushes through your body as the words leave his lips, followed by a slight pull on your heart strings. Knowing he took the time to think about bringing you something else to wear so you didn’t have to sit in your coffee scented clothes all night made you feel warm in the strangest way. He’s thoughtful, and it's weirding you out – but in a good way.

“So, where are we even going?”

“You’ll see.”

A vague yet interesting, and very on-brand response from Jisung. He’s always been a fan of surprises – as long as he’s not on the receiving end.

The drive to your destination drags on forever. You aren’t quite sure how long you’ve been on your way; between your agile back seat changing of clothes, which you are surprisingly skilled at, and the anticipation coursing through your veins, you’ve lost track of time. All you know is that you’ve been driving along the backroads of your area for at least 15 minutes, and there is nothing around you to indicate that your destination is near.

“This is it.” The car pulls into a small dirt parking lot, dimly lit by some dingy street lights that aren’t doing a very good job at their primary function. It's pretty hard to see what’s around you, no matter how hard you squint and press your forehead to the window to get a better look.

“Where are we?” The question leaves your lips in a worried fashion. Trees surround the parking lot on all three-sides, while the road you've pulled in from occupies the fourth-side. You’re hesitant to get out of the car, but as Jisung rounds the front and opens the door for you, you’re on your way out. He motions for you to hold on as he pops the trunk – returning with a blanket and a reusable shopping bag filled with god knows what.

He still hasn’t given an answer to your question though, and you still aren’t quite sure where you are. If It was lighter out you assume it would be beautiful here, all the greenery dark and shadows hovering over you from the trees.

The bright light from his cell phone flashlight lights up the way, a path on your right

“Hell no,” your arms cross over your chest as you stand still in your place. He’s out of his mind if he thinks you’re going into the woods this late at night. You’ve seen enough horror films, stuff like this never ends well.

“C’mon, it’s not as bad as it looks,” Jisung laughs at your pouting manner, amusement filling his system as you glue your feet to the ground of the parking lot. His puppy dog eyes plead for you to follow him, a hand outreaching in your direction for the taking. You contemplate it for a moment, your eyes narrowing as you ponder the possible outcomes of the situation before you.

“Fine,” you huff as you take his hand in yours.

His hand feels different in yours this time. His long fingers lacing between your smaller ones in the perfect fit that you’ve neglected to notice before. You’ve held his hand before, platonically though. This time it’s platonic too though, right? It’s just a date. A platonic date between two friends. Two friends who are dating on a two week trial period. So yes, it is strictly platonic. Right?

The dirt path doesn’t drag on for too long, but the sounds of bugs ticking and twigs breaking beneath your feet is enough to startle you. Every scared and breathy gasp that  leaves your mouth is followed by a small fit of laughter from Jisung. At least one of you is amused.

But the dirt path soon turns rocky, a clearing becoming more and more noticeable as Jisung’s flashlight brightens the way ahead of you. The rows of trees come to an end as the ground flattens, a giant slab of rock lying beneath your feet. Out ahead of you is completely dark, and until you approach the darkness you don’t notice that you’re just a few yards away from the edge of a cliff. A river lies below the edge, the sound of water rushing fills your ears and calms your nerves. It is quiet out here, peaceful and without distraction.

Jisung stands back as you admire the scenery around you – your own phone flashlight now out and panning around to look at the view. It’s beautiful out here, nothing to worry about but the sounds of the water and whatever Jisung is doing behind you…

You couldn’t have zoned out for more than 2 minutes, but once you turn back around to face him a picnic blanket lies on the ground before you. Snacks scatter the extent of the fabric, a few candles placed in the center

“You really went all out for this, huh?” A nervous laugh leaves your lips before you swallow harshly. Never in your life has a guy ever gone all out like this for you. A late-night picnic at a secret location, fixed with all of your favorite snacks and some candles for ambiance.

“Had to,” he smiles, “it’s our first date.”

You join him on the blanket, grabbing for a bag of popcorn as you sit down. Maybe relationships wouldn’t suck so much if all men treated you like this…

But it’s just Jisung. Jisung who already knows all your favorite things to eat. He’s just trying to be convincing – to prove to you that men take you on dates, do nice things. But stuff like this never lasts. Two weeks from now you’ll be going back to the same old Jisung and Y/N friendship that you’ve always had.

The conversation goes on as normal tonight, he doesn’t make any moves (as expected, it’s Jisung) and you enjoy the view and calm atmosphere with your fake but not so fake boyfriend. You stay out on the cliff for a few more hours before he takes you home. Jisung put a lot of effort into making tonight special, and you appreciate him for that. But even after all his effort, you know that real relationships aren’t like this.

Every guy you’ve dated would try to woo you over in the beginning too. They call it the honeymoon stage for a reason. Things are always great in the beginning, lavish gifts and dates, loving gestures. That kind of thing never lasts. Soon the effort runs out, the guy gets bored of putting the work in, and they end up sleeping with your freshman year roommate. Well, at least that's how it is for you.

The bundle of sunflowers Jisung gave to you earlier on in the night sits on the end table next to your bed. Each time you look at them all you can picture is the goofy grin he sported as he stood at the entrance of the coffee shop. It replays in your mind like a movie. How he dressed up all spiffy just to take you out. How he took you to a spot only he knew about, somewhere so off-site and serene that he knew you’d remain uninterrupted. You can’t help but wonder if he’s using the same old tricks on you that he does to other girls though. If he only knew about that place because he’s taken someone there before.

Not that it matters though, you aren’t his real girlfriend. You’re just on a trial period. But for some reason the thought that he might have brought another girl to the same spot before doesn’t sit well with you.

“Sooooo,” Felix teases, letting his chin fall into his palm as he leans on the counter before him, “how was your date with Y/N?”

Jisung chuckles at his nosiness, he’s sure you’ve already told Felix all about it. There are no secrets left between you two. Even sometimes Jisung felt like the odd man out when you’re all together.

“It was good.”

Jisung keeps his answer short, leaving the rest up to his imagination. He isn’t one to kiss and tell – or to not kiss and tell. Keeping his private life all to himself is something he takes pride in, things are just better that way.

“Just good?” Felix challenges, knowing there is much more that he’s leaving out. His eyes narrow as he waits for his response. You haven’t told him anything about last night, not even where you went after he picked you up. Things are radio silent on your end, which left Felix dying to know what actually happened on your ‘date that wasn't a real date.’

Jisung glances back at him, contemplating whether or not he should spill the beans. It would be kind of nice to have someone else to confide in. Especially since it's always you on the receiving end of his secrets; however, this may be the one secret that you don’t know of.

He chews on his bottom lip pensively, if anyone knows what’s on your mind, it would be Felix. Not that Jisung would ever want to pry, there's just no indication of how you feel about last night, or about him. Before Jisung can even open his mouth to speak, a knowing smirk is spread wide across Felix’s face. It’s that kind of look that makes him nervous – he knows something.

“You like her don’t you,” he muses, rubbing his hands together smooths as the words catch in the air. It’s out there now – and it’s obvious. Well, maybe not obvious, but it's clear as day to Felix – and that is more than enough to make Jisung worry.

“I don’t,” Jisung denies the other boy’s claim, his willpower too strong to give in.

“Oh yeah? So why do you self sabotage every one of your relationships then?”

The words catch Jisung off guard; his jaw clenching harshly as an annoyed breath is forced out of his nostrils. He wants to deny the claim once again, but he can’t bring himself to keep brushing off these feelings that have had a grip on him ever since he was young.

Felix is right too. He does sabotage each relationship that comes his way. Jisung goes out of his way to find something wrong with each girl he dates. He can never admit it to himself, but in the back of his mind, he knows that it's the fact that none of those girls are you. None of the girls he’s ever met could ever match up to all that you are. In his mind, you held the perfect score, and no one else had ever come close.

“It’s written all over your face every time you look at her you know.”

There's no way he’s that obvious... Did his feelings show that much whenever he was around you?

“What do you mean?” Jisung clarifies, the small once of hope bearing weight in his chest that Felix will follow up with a ‘just kidding’ or change the subject. Only the silence that falls on the room is enough of a response for Jisung to get the clue. 

“Just please don’t tell her,” he avoids eye contact with the other boy, hand gripping harshly on the countertop as he stares down at the black and white checkered tile. “I just wanted to see if I could change her mind – about the love stuff, you know?”

The second you find out about Jisung’s feelings all bets would be off. There’s no way you’d let your little arrangement continue, not if either of you could end up hurt. And he knows you only agreed to this because there is nothing between you romantically, it was a deal between two friends. The second feelings get involved, everything gets all mushy and confusing, and Jisung can’t lose you.

Felix bears his weight on the counter behind him, leaning comfortably on the cool glass. “Believe me, I want her to be done with that ‘I hate love thing’ just as much as you do,” he sighs, looking around momentarily before he clears his throat. “Want me to be honest?”

“Please.”

“I think you might be the only one who can change her mind.”

Jisung’s heart skips a beat once the words leave Felix’s mouth. Blood rushes to his ears, pumping like a snare drum as he considers his thoughts. His stomach begins to twist as he considers it, almost confused about what Felix means, but not willing to accept it. You only agreed to fake-date him, you still hate love.

A comfortable silence fills the air, Felix watching him as his lips roll between his teeth, deep in thought. Change your mind. The words repeat in Jisungs head like a broken record. That’s what he’s trying to do, all for the right reasons of course. So that you don’t  have to be so miserable about it anymore. 

But behind those selfless reasons are several smaller, selfish ones. He gets to be with you as more than a friend now, and although it’s nothing more than some kind of test run, he can’t help but feel like this can be something more too. It’d be crazy to ignore the feeling he has deep in his chest, and maybe it's a sign not to.

“Like you think…” Jisung gulps, clearing his throat as the words stutter out of his mouth, “I could get her to fall for me?”

The lack of response that Felix gives is ominous, but the raise of his eyebrows and toothy grin forming on his face needs no words to tell. 

If anyone is to change your mind, it’ll be Jisung.

That night Jisung took you to the drive-in movies. To be quite honest, you couldn’t really recall what was playing, some Pixar film with bugs as the main character if you could remember it correctly. You were far too distracted laughing with Jisung, watching as young kids played around on a grassy patch near his car. The giggles that left his lips each time the little girl waved to him were music to your ears. You never noticed how much he loved kids, how good he was with them.

The image of his hands clasped together as he fawned over the little girl, picking dandelions in the grass and racing to place them by your feet was burned into your memory. The boxy grin that graced his face all night long. The way his eyes squinted from his cheeks, pushing up as he smiled so big. The whispers of the word ‘cute’ each time her pigtails bounced while she toddled away.

Missing the movie doesn't disappoint you. If anything, the memories you've saved from tonight are more than enough.

The next night you were unable to go out, the shop was so busy that you were not able to leave until an hour and a half after your shift was supposed to end. Some punk kid dropped a cup of iced coffee on the floor on his way out and decided it would be best to leave it there without cleaning anything up or letting you know. Maybe if it hadn’t been so busy then you would have noticed the spill before it dried up and there were coffee stains stuck to the tile floors.

Naturally, you spent a good 15 minutes trying to mop up all the stickiness on the floor. But to your luck, Jisung is working with you that night. Once all the customers left the shop he hooked his phone up to the speakers, grabbed your hands, and danced you around the shop. Well, it was supposed to be dancing but it probably looked more like Jisung swinging your arms as you attempted to not trip over your own feet.

It makes up for not getting to go out though, and you’d take a night like that over a fancy dinner any chance you got. 

It’s been 12 days since you became Jisung‘s girlfriend, and as the remaining days decreased, so did your hatred for love. Each night he planned something special. The real kicker was the texts that you get once he makes it home from dropping you off every night. A simple ‘I had a great time tonight’ was enough to make your heart swell and heat rise to your cheeks.

And as you notice your hatred for love and relationships leaving you, you notice another feeling enter your system. Or several feelings…

Things are getting just as sticky as the night when two frappuccinos splattered all over the shop floor, whipped cream and all. Spending time with Jisung like this is bringing some things to the surface you didn’t know were buried in the first place.

Every night that you spent with Jisung over the past 12 days allowed you to see him in a new light. You got to see him on a different level than just friends. You got to see what every girl that fawns over Jisung experiences.

Something about your friendship never let you jump past that barrier. You only see him as a dear friend of yours. Nothing more and nothing less. And now the issue is that...you aren’t sure how you’ll ever go back to see him as such.

You like Jisung as more than a friend, that's for sure. And you know because of that things will never be able to go back to the way they once were.

Maybe you're reading too much into it, but your gut is telling you that you aren't the only one feeling this way.

The feeling of butterflies that pound in your stomach each time you meet eyes with him has to be reciprocated. There is just no way you can be feeling this way and he isn’t.

This isn’t like the feelings you’ve caught for any guy before, this is something else. Every night when you go home you lay in bed, staring at your ceiling with a dumb grin on your face as you think about your time together, about him. About the way his black curly hair falls in front of his eyes each time he looks down and how his smile lights up every room he was in.

These things that you were so blind to before can’t escape your thoughts, and it makes you wonder how many times or things you’ve looked over that make you melt, just like you are right now.

But in just 2 days, this trial-boyfriend period will be over, and you’ll have to go back to being just friends. Each day, each hour, each minute that approaches feels heavier and heavier. Anxiety floods your system each time you think about things being over, or that this arrangement you have isn’t even real.

When you think about the growing feelings you have for him, you honestly can't imagine what your life will be like any other way. What it would be like going back to just hanging out here and there. And what it would be like

You can’t even fathom thinking about what it would be like hearing him talk about another girl again. It makes you sick thinking that there's going to be someone after you, because in just 5 days this will be all over, and you’ll go back to being the girl best friend, nothing more.

Maybe it’s just wishful thinking that Jisung has more feelings for you too. But the glimmer in his eyes as his bangs brush out of his eyes and they land on you tells a different story. When he looks at you it feels like you are the only two people on earth. He sees nothing else but you, and the way your eyes sparkle back at him.

Each day you spend with Jisung after that feels like a wrench tightening the screws of your heart. 14 days is just not enough.

“Earth to Y/N,” Felix says waving a hand in your face.

You must have zoned out, for god knows how long.

“Thinking about Jisung?”

“What?” you immediately straighten your posture and brush yourself off before responding, “N-no…I’m just thinking.”

“Right,” the sarcasm drips from his lips, not sparing you any time to save yourself as he turns away, beginning to wipe off the tables in the front.

For personal reasons, you’ve kept Felix out of the loop during this whole “fake-boyfriend Jisung” thing. It’s better if you keep your feelings to yourself until you figure them out. And although it feels really really strange not giving Felix the intel on what’s going on in your life, you know it’s for your own good.

Once you put what is in your head out into the world, you can’t take it back. And what if all these things that you’re feeling is just a part of the honeymoon-phase. If that even existed anyway… But if all these feelings for Jisung are due to him trying to woo you and change your mind, everything will just fade away as things return back to normal. And then you’ll be left loving him in silence while you watch him blow through relationships like a leaf blows through the wind.

Something in you tells you that this isn't the case, but the small shadow of doubt in the back of your mind keeps you from talking to your best friend about it anyway.

The thing is, you don't have to tell Felix for him to know. Every time Jisung picks you up from work to take you out you shine. Your smile spreads so wide he’s afraid your cheeks will tear. The nervous shake of your fingers as you grab for your belongings as you head out the door doesn’t go unnoticed in Felix’s eyes. He knows you too well to look over things like this, he just wanted to wait for you to say something first.

But now that you aren’t, Felix has decided to take matters into his own hands, asking you about it himself.

“Felix,” you start, waiting for his attention before you pull out a stool, sitting down and motioning for him to follow suit. Quickly he does, a questioning but knowing look evident on his face as the stool squeaks under him. “You know how this thing between Jisung and I is just an experiment or whatever?”

He nods in response, his hand quickly falling into his palm as he listens intently to your words.

“I think I messed up.” Your head is buried in your arms, laid over the tabletop in embarrassment.

“What do you mean?”

His question is more for clarification, he wants to hear you say it yourself. Felix knows that you’re gonna tell him that you’ve already caught feelings. He sees it coming from a mile away, you confirming it is just the icing on the cake.

“Don’t make me say it,” you whine, neglecting to pick your head up and look at him. You can feel the grin on his face. You know he's smirking at you right now, doing his best to hold back a laugh. Finally, you over the ‘I hate love and relationships suck’ thing.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about,” he sings, quite obviously teasing you while another deep sigh echoes from your chest. You manage to pick your head up, leaning onto your elbows with your chin caught between your palms as you face him.

“I like him.”

It comes out as a whisper, but Felix hears it loud and clear. If you didn’t know better, you’d assume that the smile on his face can't grow any larger, but it does. He jumps up from his chair in victory, doing a funny dance with his arms whooping in the air to celebrate. You’re confused as to why, but you’re too far in your own thoughts to pay it any mind; your head just sinks back into your arms as your forehead presses against the cold metal table beneath you.

“I knew it,” Felix smiles, his happy dance subsiding as he positions himself back down across from you. “I knew this fake dating thing was gonna work.

“Yeah well it really worked, because now I have feelings for a guy that’s never gonna reciprocate them for me.” Your tone is laced with sarcasm, a disappointing ring sounding off on each of your words. You’re too embarrassed to look at the boy sitting before you, worried that if you do all the emotions you’ve been holding onto for so long will spill over and stain your stone-cold image; one you’ve maintained for far too long.

But Felix is your best friend. The only one that you should be comfortable being vulnerable about your feelings for Jisung with; for some reason all you can’t bring yourself to be. Before you can get a grip on your emotions tears are streaming down your face and falling onto the cold metal surface under you in small puddles. 

A sympathetic sigh leaves Felix’s lips as he tries to gain your attention, “Hey.”

Inhaling deeply, you face him – mascara strewn across your face in black streaks and eyes nearly bloodshot. You’ve held this in for far too long. Only a double would tire you out and exhaust you enough to cry on the clock. Thank god it’s a rainy day, no customers ever come in on rainy days.

Or at least, no customers usually come in on rainy days. It's not until you hear the bells on the front door ring that you’re wiping your eyes, whipping around to greet whoever was entering.

And then you see him, standing there as he shakes out his umbrella, a bouquet of sunflowers in his hand.

And he sees you; mascara running down your face and tears staining your cheeks. He’s early. Your stomach turns at the sight of him, emotions not stable enough to handle carry a normal conversation like  

“Y/N,” his voice is quiet, worry dripping in his tone as your name leaves his lips. But you can’t face him right now, not like this.

Your feet move faster than you mind, standing up and rushing to the back to avoid him. Jisung doesn’t follow you, just stands there and watches you walk away, solemn and worried that he’s done something. 

It’s not until Felix is rising from his seat and pacing over to him that he’s brought back to reality.

“Jisung...” he starts, hands coming up slowly to console him, “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be here right now.”

“Wh-what’s wrong?” His lip worries between his teeth, eyes glossy as he stares at the door you just closed behind you. He’s looking at it intently, mind flooding with worry, wishing so badly that the door will just fly open, and you’ll tell him what was going on. In the back of his mind, he knows that you won’t, at least not for now. Talking about emotions has never been your strong suit, and chances of that changing at this moment are at an all-time low.

Felix is unsure how to answer him, caught in between not wanting to lie and keeping your feelings private. He can’t speak for you; but he’s scared that saying nothing could just make this whole situation worse.

His mouth gapes as he searches for a response to his question, lips opening and closing while he hums to himself.

The umbrella hanging from Jisung’s hand drops with a crash, starling Felix as he jumps at the sudden sound. But before he is even able to speak, the bell to the front door is ringing again, and Jisung is walking away into the pouring rain.

The next day you wake up feeling numb. You’ve received several texts from Jisung the night before, none of which you have the energy to reply to or even look at for that matter.

The guilt riddling your body has become too much for you to handle. You left work last night without even saying goodbye to Felix. He’s a good enough friend and coworker to know that what you’re going through is more important than working the counter at an coffee shop. 

After Jisung left, Felix came back and let you know; he almost had to break down the door to the backroom in order for you to let him in. He told you to go home, get some rest and that you’d talk tomorrow.

But after waking up the last thing you want to do is talk about Jisung, it hurts enough just thinking about him.

Every time you thought about how your arrangement was supposed to end in just a few days you felt sick. You have worked so hard to open up just to build your walls back up again. And now you’re back at square one.

When you agreed to be Jisung’s girlfriend you did not expect to fall for him like this. He’s Jisung for god’s sake. He’s your personal diary, he’s the one who knows all the shit that nobody else does. And he’s the only one that listens to all the dumb shit you have to say that no one else cares about.

Feelings ruin everything. Love sucks, and you knew this before you agreed. You agreed under the circumstances that Jisung could show you that relationships could be fun; not under the circumstances that he would make you fall in love with him,

And the more that you think about it, maybe you were always in love with him. Maybe you always had these feelings for him, but they were trapped in the tight bonds of friendship that your subconscious never let you out.

But none of that even mattered now. The deal had to be off, and you need to distance yourself from Jisung before you are hurt any worse. The longer this goes on the worse that you are going to feel when it's all over.

How are you supposed to go back to normal after this? Like is Jisung thinking that showing you how amazing relationships are, you won't fall for him or something? Or does his true plan consist of making you fall in love with him, just to string you along like every other girl he's dated?

You’re trapped in the never-ending spiraling thoughts, soiling your image of Jisung with each new theory that crosses your mind. None of them are good. All of them paint him as a player, as someone who just used you.

But the little thump in your heart when you notice the sunflowers placed on your bedside table wants your mind to change. Your heart wants you to believe that Jisung feels something too, that throughout this arrangement he has seen a different side to you too – that he’s fallen for you just like you have for him.

It's a knock at your door that guides you out of your thoughts. The repetitive tapping at your front door that drags you out of bed. And when you check your peephole and it's no one else, but your small blonde best friend standing on your doorstep that has relief rushing through your system.

The door cracks open, Felix standing there with an umbrella in his hand – even though it was nearly 100º with clear skies.

“Why are you still in your pajamas? It's noon.”

Suddenly, he pushes past you and invites himself into to your living room. Plopping down on your couch, Felix makes himself comfortable as he waits for you to join. You spin on your heels, an exhausted breath leaving your mouth as you pace over to him, plopping down on the next cushion over.

“Why the umbrella?” Your brow furrows as he hands it over. You take it though, still confused behind the meaning of the object that you're holding and where it came from.

“It’s Jisung’s.”

You nearly drop it as his name leaves his lips. The name causes your stomach to tighten, mouth-drying instantly as emotions well behind your eyes.

“Why?” Is all you can mutter out. Why was he giving it to you, why is he here, and why did he have it?

“You need to bring it back to him.” He says sternly, his eyes locked on you as he waits for you to look back at him. But you’re too focused on the umbrella placed gently in your hands, tracing your finger over every wire and the soft rubber handle.

“I can’t.” Your words come out in a whisper, breath light and airy as you sigh, sinking your body back into the couch cushions. Giving the umbrella back to Jisung will mean that you have to go see him. And if you see him, he’s going to want to talk to you about last night, then question you about why you haven’t been returning his texts. No. You will not be giving Jisung his umbrella back.

“Y/N,” your name leaves his mouth gently, a sigh following it before he reaches for you, rubbing your arm comfortingly before continuing, “I think you need to talk to him.”

“Felix you know I can’t do that.”

You’re serious in your words. Not that you don’t want to talk to Jisung. You most definitely want to – and if you could, you would. But you can’t. There are too many emotions involved. The wound is fresh and seeing him would be rubbing salt right into it.

“Y/N,” he sighs, this time more forceful, like he’s trying to get something across to you but it's going right over your head. “Talk to him. Please.”

“You know I’m going to end up hurt if I do.” Tears well in your eyes as the words croak from your throat. It's dry and scratchy, full of fear and anxiety.

“I think you’d be surprised,” he mumbles, his eyes instantly widening on realizing the words that just escaped. Eyes wide with confusion, you’re begging him to go on, but if he does then Jisung won’t be the only one in deep shit right now. It's not up to Felix to tell you what he knows this time. 

“What do you mean I’ll be surprised?”

“I have to go,” he stands instantly, motioning to the umbrella, “and you need to bring this back.”

With a slight ruffle to your hair, Felix is giving you a supporting smile and waving goodbye. And you’re left alone once again – just you and Jisung’s blue umbrella.

It takes a lot of courage to get ready today. You make sure to take your sweet time rummaging through your closet, flipping through articles of clothing for the better half of an hour. At the end, you opt to go with a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt. There isn't enough energy in your body to put on anything else, and you know you’ll just want to curl back up in bed once you get home. Sweatpants are safe, and safe is just what you need.

No makeup today either. If things are anything like you’re expecting, your makeup will just end up ruined anyway. It's your better judgment to shower though, you’ve neglected to take one after work last night; opting to just bury yourself under your covers as soon as you got back. But today is a new day. And with a fresh shower and your comfiest pair of sweatpants, you are about as ready as you’ll ever be to get your heart broken into a billion pieces. 

Umbrella in hand, you step out onto your front steps, relishing in your last few moments of ignorant bliss before making your way to Jisung’s. You immediately regret your wardrobe decision as the sun beats down on your frame, the humidity making you feel sticky and gross – your favorite pants are  no match for this heat.

But you’re on your way to your destination anyway, the drive feeling longer and more drawn out than normal. Jisung didn’t live that far away from you, but the ride there still felt like an eternity with each theoretical scenario passing your mind. 

Dragging your feet, you make your way to the front steps of his house. You’ve been here a million times, but today is different. From now on, every time you drive past this place all you’ll know is heartache.

You brush yourself off, taking a deep breath before bringing your hand up and pushing the doorbell. The sudden ringing sound startles you, even though you have every indication that it’s coming – you’re just too nervous and jumpy for your own good.

Footsteps approach the door, your stomach tightening more and more with the muffled pitter-patter of footsteps. You’re praying to God that it’s his mom, hoping that Jisung just so happens to be out – even though his car is in plain sight parked just a few meters away from you. Wishful thinking, you suppose.

When the door to his house opens, you struggle to maintain your composure. He’s dressed similarly to you; a pair of sweats and an old sports t-shirt that has definitely seen better days.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

His eyes are sunken in, dark circles dragging underneath his eyes and his lips pulled downwards. He looks like a sad puppy, his dark hair all scruffy and sticking up in each direction – probably from him running his hands through it so many times. 

“I came to give you this,” you extend the umbrella out before you. He nods before taking hold of it, his hand far at the opposite end making sure not to keep his distance. The more you look at him, the more sorry you feel for dodging his texts. He looks like he hasn’t slept a wink, and you’re afraid it’s all because of you.

“Oh...uh, thanks,” he struggles to make eye contact with you, looking down at the object in his hand. 

It’s awkward, uncomfortable, and you can’t seem to find the words to say to break this strange tension between the two of you. He’s acting weird, shifting his weight back and forth but not moving away to close the door. His mind is racing once again – contemplating whether or not to just invite you in or leave it at that.

But with every aching bone in his body, he musters up the courage to lift his head, looking you directly in the eyes. Their dark like his, definitely from the lack of sleep you had the night before. Your mouth is turned downward too; hands fiddling together to try and distract yourself.

“D-Do you wanna come in?” He stutters, stepping aside slowly as he gestures towards his house. He suddenly worries when you don’t respond right away, taking a second to contemplate if this is a good idea or not. Ripping off the band-aid is never easy, but it needs to be done.

“Sure,” is the word that you decide on – hoping that it doesn’t make you seem disinterested or too desperate to talk. Maybe he’s just being kind though. Maybe it’s an empty offer, something that you say when you’re trying to be nice, but subconsciously hope that they won’t take you up on it. Like when you offer to share your food with someone, but you’re really hungry. You do it to be nice, not because you actually want to split the delicious looking burger and fries on your plate.

He leads you inside and to his bedroom. It looks the same as always, but it feels different. It still smells like him though, the comforting woodsy scent of pine and mahogany that he always reaches for. But that comforting scent is anything but comfortable. You’re frozen in place, unsure if you should sit on his bed and make yourself at home, much like every other time in the past. For now you just stand in the doorframe, waiting for him to tell you to take a seat, just like any polite guest would. A guest. You have never felt like a guest in his home before, or around Jisung in general. But that imaginary wall between the two of you is standing tall and sturdy, and suddenly the two of you are reverted back to being strangers.

You watch as he toys with something on his desk, his fingers dancing from object to object and sifting through papers to look busy. The point of it – unknown to you but to him, he’s buying time. Trying to think of the first thing to say, what to ask, or if you even wanted to talk. Maybe you only agreed to come inside to be nice. Maybe you were too worried about hurting his feelings if you said no. But alas, here you are, standing awkwardly in his doorway as he shuffles around his room, his brain flooding with thoughts – but his mouth can not form them into audible words.

“I’m sorry for ignoring your texts.”

Your voice catches his attention, dropping whatever paper he’s looking at now and turning his gaze to you. You’re sunken into yourself, your chest thumping with anxiety as his eyes begin to wander your frame. Not in a ‘I’m checking you out’ manner though; more of a ‘you look so sad and I don’t know what to say to you right now’ kind of way. 

It’s true though, he doesn’t know what to say – which is why he’s staring at you, hoping the right words would just pop up and he didn’t have to use any brain-power at all. He doesn’t want to say ‘it's okay,’ because it's not. You never ignore his texts, and that alone tells him enough about what's going on. You are upset at him.

“What did I do wrong, Y/N?”

His words sound accusatory but his tone is soft, gentle and full of worry. Eyes swollen and looking like they are about to fill to the brim with tears, his sight is focused on you; now not able to look away.

“I-I don’t know…”

Your answer is honest. You don’t know if his intentions are dirty. Yeah, that’s what you thought initially, but looking at him with such hurt written all over his face tells a different story. 

Jisung is silent, unsure of what more he can do or say to make you talk to him. He can’t force you to open up, he never has and he never will – that’s always been his rule. Everything you’ve shared with him has been on your own terms and conditions. Jisung has always been here to be your listening ear, but he never prys.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

His voice is soft, eyes full of sympathy as he holds himself together. Those were the words he has been looking for. Now the ball is in your court and you’ll have to be the one leading the conversation. It’s just what he needed to figure this shit out.

“I-I don’t know.”

“Y/N,” he sighs as he drops himself down onto the mattress, “I shouldn’t have to say this for you to know it, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

You do know that. You really, really do. But this time things are different. Is he expecting you to just come out and speak your truth like there won’t be consequences? No, he won’t push you to tell him anything you don’t want to. But the worry in his eyes and clammy hands are begging for you to just let it out so he can stop being in the dark.

You sigh out an ‘okay’ before sitting down beside him. 

Rip the band-aid off Y/N. Quick and painless.

His eyes narrow, almost to a squint, staring right through you in hopes of reading your thoughts. Your expression is nothing but blank as you try your best to gain some sort of composure. Do you just speak up and spill your guts? The words replay in your mind over and over until your thoughts are beat down and misshapen. 

You can picture his face when you say it; disgusted with a trace of disappointment and some confusion spread into the mix. Or maybe he’ll laugh at how pathetic you were, catching feelings for your fake boyfriend.

That’s it. There’s no way you can tell him. It would be much easier to just get up and leave. Tell him to pretend like none of this ever happened and that you needed some time to cool off. A few months maybe, or maybe you could just ghost him entirely. 

“Y/N?”

The sound of his voice breaks you out of your toxic thoughts, and his chocolate brown eyes bring you back down to earth. You can’t just leave him in the dust. He’s looking at you like you’re the only thing that exists. Things will be okay, right?

“Sorry, sorry,” you exhale deeply as you calm your thoughts; shifting the nasty scenarios out and accepting that whatever happens after this conversation is your fate. 

“Jisung, I-I guess I wasn’t expecting this boyfriend-girlfriend thing we’re doing to go like this.”

His brow quirks at your words, confusion riddling his expression as his eyes narrow. With a tilt of his head, he’s pushing you to continue, visibly riddled with your choice of words.

“Swear you’ll be honest when I ask you this?” You question him, your hand moving closer to his as you lean in slightly. He’s like a magnet, you can’t help yourself from moving closer; even though the proximity of the two of you is clouding your thoughts and you can feel your heart beginning to swell.

He nods in response to your question, his eyes full of concern as he waits for you to continue, “Why did you ask me to do this thing?”

He knows that a question like this was coming, only if he could have prepared for it. But he didn’t, so his throat is left dry and scratchy as his mouth opens, only to stutter a bit before closing it back up. No coherent thoughts or words are able to escape his lips, just nonsense mumbling that caught himself off guard.

With a deep breath, he closes his eyes, regaining his composure before he can face you again. He agreed to be honest, and if honesty is what you want, honesty is that you’ll get.

“I’m sorry.” That’s all that he can say. 

Oh no. This is exactly what you were expecting before you came here. He’s gonna tell you that he didn’t mean to mess with your emotions, that he felt you catching feelings and got carried away. That he’s sorry that he ruined your friendship and played you like a violin all at once.

“Me too.”

You don’t know why you’re apologizing, but you are. It feels wrong. Absolutely utterly, and undoubtedly wrong. Apologizing for your own feelings is not something that you are okay with. Especially when he made you fall for him like this. Okay so maybe thinking that is giving him too much power, but who the hell takes you out on dates for nearly 2 weeks straight just to laugh about it later. How can he expect you to not catch feelings for him? With his deep voice and fluffy hair that always hangs in front of his eyes, that little giggle he has when he finds something amusing. Everything about him was attractive. And you’ve fallen for it all. Hard.

“Wait, why are you sorry?”

A scoff escapes your mouth unintentionally, but it’s well deserved. “For being the idiot to fall for a guy that was playing her, I guess.”

You can’t look at him any longer, so your eyes fall to your lap, staring at your chipped nail polish and dirty fingernails instead of reading whatever dumb expression he has now. But if you just took a second to look up, you’d notice the widening of his eyes, how his fingers are beginning to shake and his mouth gape. 

“Wh-What?”

“Don’t make me say it again Jisung, I don’t feel like sounding stupid one more time.”

“No no I heard you, it's just,” his eyes slam shut, angry at himself that he let things get this far without keeping you in the loop. 

You’ve been telling him that you hate love for years now. After hearing it so many times, he’d just given up on the thought of you. Maybe if he said something before you went through all those shitty guys things could have been different. But he’s let this go on for far too long, and now you’re the one that was paying the price. 

“Y/N I have feelings for you.”

Your neck nearly breaks with how fast your head snaps up. He’s the one looking away now, his cheeks a bit rosy as he tries to hide himself. He isn’t doing a very good job though, his hair is only shadowing his eyes and you can clearly see the way he’s nervously chewing on his lip; a cute habit you have grown fond of these past couple of weeks.

If he didn’t look like he does right now, you’d assume he was messing around. But you know Jisung. You know his small little gestures and what they mean by now. You know when he’s being serious and when he’s telling a lie. He can look someone dead in the eye and lie to them, but when he tells the truth, he becomes shy and worried that he’s said the wrong thing. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You ask softly, gently reaching for his hand. The subtle contact makes him flinch, reacting by pulling your hand away. But his eyes meet your sympathetic ones, sparkling just like they always do, and he knows what he wants.

Jisung’s hand reaches back for yours, lacing his fingers through yours before giving your hand a light squeeze. “You hate relationships,” he chuckles lightly, the mood of the room instantly shifting as the laughter leaves his lips. 

“I hated the ones that weren’t with you,” you correct him, but your voice comes across as just a whisper. He’s close enough to hear though, a blushing grin forming on his face as you shyly look away. His heart flutters when he hears it, a million butterflies erupting in his tummy all at once.

“I hated the ones that weren’t with you too,” he coos, his eyes wide and sparkling as he looks at you with such adoration. 

Time moves in slow motion as his hand meets your cheek, your eyes look deeply into his chocolate ones as he moves in closer. As your eyelids flutter shut his tongue runs across his bottom lip, wetting the surface before closing the distance between you. Finally.

And in that moment you’re at peace. Everything you thought you’ve ever hated, love, relationships, and maybe Jisung for a hot second, are the only things that you long for. The 14 days don’t have to be over, and your days no longer have to be counted. When you’re with Jisung you’re happy, you’re comfortable, and you're confident that he can give you what you have always deserved – but have never gotten. 

His lips move against yours in slow, languid motions, his large hands holding you close like he’s holding on for dear life. But you won’t leave even if you want to, not now, not after all this. 

Slowly, Jisung shifts his weight and you move in succession. He’s laying you down on his bed, gently climbing over you without breaking the kiss. Things are becoming more heated now, you can feel it as his hungry lips devour your own. Your chest heaves up to meet his, your back arching off the mattress as his hands begin to scour your body. The heat pooling in between your legs is growing, an aching sensation overwhelming your core as your own hands reach up to rake through his long, fluffy hair. And you can tell he wants you too, the thin fabric of his sweatpants doing little to conceal the growing erection pressing against your thigh. 

You can’t help but let out a steep moan as his hips begin to grind into yours. Needy groans fall past his lips and onto yours as you roll your hips upwards to meet his small ruts. 

In a leisurely motion, Jisung’s body is moving upwards, his knee finding a place between your legs as he brings himself up to a kneeling position. You chase his lips the entire way there, sitting up straight to be sure the contact doesn’t vanish, too consumed by your need for him to leave his lips.

And then his needy hands are running along the waistband of your sweats, fiddling with the tie before breaking your heated kiss. “Is this okay?” His words come out in a whisper, his eyes searching yours for any signs of doubt, but all he sees is lust.

“Yes,” you confirm, out of breath from making-out for so long without coming up for air. The lightheaded feeling taking over you goes unnoticed though, and quite frankly you’re too caught up in Jisung to care.

Quickly, he rids you of your pants, looking back up at you for confirmation about your underwear. With an affirmative nod he’s removing those too, leaving you completely bare from the waist down as he stands over you fully clothed.

But soon he’s ridding himself of his own clothing, his shirt being pulled at the nape of his neck as he discards it across the room. He’s leaning back down to you, hungry for the feeling of your lips. He misses it, even though it's been less than a minute since he’s last felt your smooth lips on his. 

You won’t open your eyes to see, but with the shuffling movements and shaky connection between your mouths you can tell Jisung is stripping himself of any remaining clothing he has on. He’s needy, unable to wait any longer to get down to business, he’s already waited long enough.

You’re the one who breaks the kiss this time, too curious to see what he’s sporting down below for your own good. But you are not disappointed once you see it – he’s long and girthy; the pigment a shade or two darker from his skin tone than the rest of his body.  Your thoughts are wandering, wondering what it's like to have him inside of you; dreaming about what he feels like. Arousal pools at your core, mouth salivating as your daydreams linger.

“Like what you see?” Jisung chuckles. You barely notice that you’ve been staring, eyes wide and focused on the hardened dick before you, which is probably a bit uncomfortable for him. 

“Sorry!” You cringe at yourself lightly, covering your eyes in embarrassment in fear that you just ruined the mood you’ve worked too hard to create.

“Don’t apologise,” he smiles as he grabs your wrists, moving them away from your round eyes. Scrunching your nose in displeasure, you catch your lip in between your teeth, mentally face palming at how weird you’re being.

He couldn’t blame you though, it was taking everything in him not to gawk at you. It was the first time you’ve seen eachother naked. Bathing suits did little for your imagination, not that you had even thought about Jisung this way before.

But he eases your nerves by coming down face level with you, reaching for your shirt and pulling it up over your head. You look at him with wide eyes, taking in each part of him as he caresses your body gently. He’s in awe of you like this. So relieved that you’re finally his, that he has you like this.

Nimble fingers dance down your body, landing at your core as he runs one up your slit, collecting your arousal on his fingertip. An impressed smirk grows slowly on his face, “I can’t believe you’re this wet already,” he hums. “All for me.” 

His eyes remain focused on your center, devouring it with his eyes as his hands hold steady on your thighs. You can’t help but grow slightly embarrassed, dripping with arousal so early on though he’s barely touched you. A lump forms in your throat causing you to swallow thickly – this doesn’t go unnoticed by Jisung.

A concerned expression crosses his face, brow furrowing as he moves his hands upward to settle on your waist. “Hey,” his voice is soft, gentle and full of worry, “everything okay?” 

“Just nervous,” you answer, a fake smile showing on your face to try and combat your own emotions.

It is no secret that Jisung is a bit more experienced than you are in bed. He knows that, you know that, and that is enough to turn you into a nervous wreck. Leave it to your own thoughts to ruin the moment.

“We don’t have to…”

“No!” Your voice comes out a little too eager, a bit loud, shocking Jisung. His eyes widen in response, body jolting from the impact of your tone. “No,” you say more gently this time, “I want to.”

You did want to – you just have to get over your own nerves first. Lucily, Jisung didn’t mind and was willing to guide you through it.

With a reassuring smile plastered across his face, he laces his fingers through yours. As you lock eyes, you nod him onward, giving him the go-ahead to continue. He moves languidly, his fingers moving back down to trace your slit once more. The sensation makes you tense, the nerves tingling through your body making it difficult for you to calm down. 

But with a reassuring squeeze of his hand to yours, you’re taking a deep breath. Closing your eyes as you lie your head backwards onto his pillowcase. The smell of him consumes you, relaxing you effectively as his fingers meet the entrance of your core.

Shivers run through your body as he dips one finger inside. Your arousal acts as a natural lube, letting his finger glide gracefully into you. You gasp at the sensation, eyes rolling back into your head as he begins caressing your walls. His finger moves swiftly in and out of your core, his other hand still locked with yours to guide you through.

With your body finally relaxing, Jisung is able to add another finger into the mix. The extra pressure makes you shudder for a moment, taking a little to adjust to the greater size inside of you. Thankfully the mild discomfort subsides, and he’s able to pump his fingers in and out once more. 

He’s making sure to watch each of your expressions, growing harder and harder just from watching your face contort in bliss. With each of his movements you bite down harder onto your lip, focusing on him and him only. 

“You’re doing so well,” he praises as his thumb rubs circles over your hand soothing you. You can feel your heart swell at his words, heat beginning to rise to your cheeks. 

In one swift motion, Jisung begins to separate his fingers, stretching your walls as his digits move in scissor-like motions inside you. “Fuck,” you mumble, hips jutting forward in reaction. 

A steep moan leaving your lips as he brings his fingers back together, just to extend them once more. Your body is quickly getting used to the pressure, begging for more as you roll your hips.

He can sense that you’re eager from your movements alone. With one final squeeze, his hand is leaving yours. The empty feeling in your palm is unpleasant. But once you open your eyes and notice he’s using it to palm himself, his fingers groping around his length and beginning to pump slowly, that empty feeling is replaced with something else. 

Your mouth salivates with desire, hungry for the feeling of him inside of you. He’s aroused you enough, and you’re too eager to feel him for your own good.

“Jisung,” you moan, “fuck me please.”

His cock jumps in reaction to your words, his chest heaving as his breath catches in his throat. Never in his life did he expect to hear those words come out of your mouth – but he wouldn't mind hearing it again.

“Hmm?” He hums, knowing damn well what you said but being greedy enough to pretend that he didn’t. You whine in response, your legs shaking on the bed in a mini temper-tantrum.

“Please,” you drag out, “please fuck me.”

Your words are music to his ears. He removes his fingers from your dripping cunt, grabbing the backs of your knees to pull you closer to him and hike your legs up over his hips.

“Anything for you.”

Complying to your wish, he lines the tip of his cock up with your entrance. The feeling of his smooth head against your core is enough to make you moan, your head thrown back to expose the soft skin of your neck.

Jisung takes this as an opportunity to leave his own mark behind, leaning down to attach his lips to your skin. You gasp as his teeth graze your skin, his plump lips sucking harshly before his tongue is swiping over the area to soothe it. 

But your eyes open once he’s beginning to pull away to look at you. His eyes are dark, full of lust mixed with adoration, a sigh of relief leaving his chest as he gazes down at you under him. There’s a lot going on in his head right now. Of all the emotions swirling around, the thing he’s most focused on is how lucky he is to have you.

And before you know it, he’s leaning down. Pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, making you smile. One more kiss is left on your forehead before he's pulling back, securing the position of your legs on his hips. 

And then he’s realigning himself with your core, pushing past your entrance and slowly descending into the depths of your pussy. He’s moving slowly, taking his time as he thrusts into you. The delicious stretch is unfamiliar, but it's not uncomfortable – like you were made just for him. A simultaneous groan leaves your lips as he bottoms out, the tip of his cock pressing deep into you on a spot that’s gone untouched. 

He hums a sigh of contempt before pulling back, only to rock his hips into you once again. Your velvety walls welcome him delightedly, soft whimpers leaving your lips once he bottoms out again.

“Y/N,” your name leaves his lips in a low grunt, the bones of his pelvis driving into your skin as he begins to pick up his pace. In reaction you clench down on him, orgasm beginning to loom overhead with each movement of his hips.

Desire fills your senses as you roll your hips over to meet his thrusts. His movements are slow and intentional, making sure to bottom out each time to watch you squirm over his dick. He loves how your jaw drops each time his tip presses against your g-spot, knowing just when he hits it each time.

Jisung’s teeth are barred, sweat gathering at his brow as his dark fluffy hair sticks to his face. He’s trying to hold himself back, the overwhelming urge to finish just in reach, but he doesn’t want to stop. So his hands roam your body to try and distract him, his palms caressing up the sides of your torso as your back bridges into him. The feeling of hot breath fans over your face with each sigh he lets out. 

But the tightening knot in your stomach is threatening to snap with every movement of his hips. It's getting harder and harder to hold on with the power of his thrusts growing stronger.

“Jisung,” you whine, “so close” your hands find his back, fingernails dragging down his spine in attempts to ground yourself. Jisung’s face contorts as your nails pierce his skin, leaving lines of red scratches down the length of his posterior.

The stretch from his length and his rhythmic motions sends your senses into overdrive. Squeezing your eyes shut and grasping onto the sheets underneath you, you can taste the brink of your orgasm. Jisung is focused; his grip on your thighs strong and his face contorted with bliss. But all you can think about is how stupid you could have been if you had decided to just cut him out. What matters is that you’re here with him now, and the thought of that is enough to push you over the edge. 

Your breath hitches in your throat, stomach twisting and turning as your pussy throbs repeatedly around his member. Emotions running high, three words almost slip past your lips, but with the small amount of strength you can muster up, you hold them back. Another time, some time that isn't so lust filled like this one.

Jisung’s thrusts are growing sloppy. His grip on your legs tightening as his lip is caught between his teeth. And with just a few quick thrusts, he’s coming undone inside of you. White, hot spurts of cum paint your walls, filling you up and making you feel so unbelievably full. 

You’ve always felt close to Jisung – he knew everything about you and vice versa; but this time was different. The way his hands settled on your legs, bringing them down gently after finishing. How his eyes are becoming so soft as he looks at you, a lazy grin pulling at his lips. You’ve never felt closer to Jisung as you do in the moment. As his body collapses next to yours, pulling you in and holding you close as you recover from your highs, you’re completely at peace.

“Sorry I got carried away, I guess I should have asked if you’re on birth control still,” he laughs, burying his face into the crook of your neck. 

“Don’t worry, I am,” you chuckle alongside him.

Your naked bodies tangle together, his leg weaving its way through yours to be as close to you as possible. He’s intoxicated by you, closing his eyes as he rests against your body in complete bliss. Now that he has you this close he never wants to let go; and neither do you.

“Can I tell you something?” His voice is soft, whisper like but still holding confidence; his tone never falters.

“Anything.”

“I love you, Y/N.”

Butterflies erupt in your tummy, your heart thudding in your chest as heat rises to your cheeks. He loves you. It's not that friendship kind of love anymore; it's the relationship kind. The same kind that makes your heart skip a beat and body riddle with every emotion in the book. The kind that keeps you up all night thinking about – but also helps you fall asleep, knowing he’ll be there in the morning.

And all of a sudden it seems so stupid that you were fighting those words back in the heat of the moment just a few minutes ago. He felt it too, you always knew that.

“I love you, Jisung.”

Being in love is a dumb concept. All guys suck, relationships are stupid and love is a social construct that you didn’t feel like conforming to. There was absolutely no one that you would waste your time on, until Jisung came around. What you had been looking for your entire life has always been right infront of your eyes – you were just too dumb to see it.

Maybe love is alright, after all.

‘Perfect Score’ is copyright 2020-2021 @chaangbin, all rights reserved. Please do not repost on any platform or translate without permission.

↠ A/N this fic has been rewritten/reconcepted from my previous BTS fic Crush Culture.

#stray kids smut #han jisung smut #kdiner #kwritersworldnet #stayracha #kafenetwork #skz x reader #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids fanfic #han jisung #jisung x reader #jisung smut #jisung fluff #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #han jisung x reader #skz jisung fanfic #jisung fanfic

[extremelyblackandwhite]

dress

pairing: sheriff lee bodecker x younger! reader

warnings: cheating, smut, age gap, angst, blackmailing 

a/n: the reader is at least 10 years younger than lee. if that upsets you, please don’t read this work. additionally, i based reader’s 60′s style mostly out of  that oufit margot robbie wore for once upon a time in hollywood and megan from mad men, you can see my inspiration outfits here [x] [x] hope you enjoy it xx

Inescapable, I'm not even gonna try and if I get burned, at least we were electrified. I'm spilling wine in the bathtub, you kiss my face and we're both drunk. Everyone thinks that they know us, but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience, pining in anticipation, my hands are shaking from holding back from you ...

The rain fell harshly and unkindly on the pavement for the fifth day in a row, the sun having forsaken the forgotten hellish town that was Knockemstiff, Ohio. Few could say the name and ever fewer dared to enter the town. Even God’s afraid of it, his mother would tell him after nursing what felt like another one of her endless bottles of liquor. It was a haunted town, not a lot left and those who did never crossed paths with it again. Murder and crime were all time highs but not even the government dared to come in and try to to anything which meant any police force in the town were like gods, deciding who lived and who didn’t. One of those god-like men was Lee Bodecker, however he preferred you called him Sheriff Lee Bodecker.  He was a chubby man in his early thirties, tall but the beer belly made him hunch making him look shorter than he was. He had once been the envy of the town, one of the most handsome men of the town but years of living in Knockemstiff wear down everyone. His own poison had been alcohol which had ended up with him in therapy with his wife and with a therapist who had told him to curb the craving of alcohol with sweets instead. It had little to nothing as he still drank like his life depended on it and tonight was no different from other nights. He took off his hat as he entered the local bar in town, the only bar in town, and everyone looked his way, silence installing the ever noisy bar. He liked it, Lee liked it. He knew he was not the handsome one, in fact his look made him quite funny so he made himself scary. Lee made sure that everyone who looked his way, heard his voice or saw his shadow was afraid of him. It definitely worked as once he sat on the bar stool, there was already a glass with 5 fingers of his favourite drink. 

Everything was silence except for the mumbling of men discussing their days until suddenly the mumbling was no longer about the hell that was living in Knockemstiff. He turned around in his chair and understood why the men were suddenly so interested. There she was, dressed in a high neck black shirt which stood over a white skirt. Matching go go boots left her legs bare, something women in Knockemstiff did not do, still stuck in decades of last. She wasn’t from around and everyone knew it merely by the way she dressed but Sheriff Bodecker knew different. Men watched like dogs as she made her way to the bar, to his side. 

     - Y/N. - he greeted her. - What are you doing here? Trying to disrupt the town?

     - My grandmother died.

     - I heard. My condolences.

     - She left me all of what was hers including the house so I’m here to sell it. 

     - The one in Brewer Heights? - she nodded. - Tis a nice house, but I don’t think anyone here would have enough to buy it.

     - I’ll decide that. - she held the glass the bartender in between her hands, her eyes roaming over to his hands were his wedding ring had started to become tight around his finger. - Still with Jane?

     - Why wouldn’t I be? - he cocked an eyebrow at her. - What are you doing here, Y/N?

    - I told you, I’m here to sell ...

    - No. - he interrupted. - Why are you here, at the bar? What do you want?

    - Nothing ...  I see you’re not in the mood to help me anyways. - she got up from the stool she had sat on, straightening her skirt as her feet hit the floor. - Good evening, Sheriff Bodecker. 

He was sat, watching her leave but also giving an aura to the men who too watched the modern girl exit the building not to get any ideas. Lee knew these men, they were like dogs and once a suitable amount of time passed, he took to returning to his cruiser and follow her. How could he trust this town with her, an outsider? Y/N had been brought up in Knockemstiff, the daughter of store owners who had both been killed in an assault gone wrong. After that, she was ushered to live with her grandmother, the last of socialites in Knockemstiff. Rumours said her grandmother had moved from New York to wed with a penniless man already expecting once she wore her wedding gown. Rumours or not, she still held much more money than anyone in the town together and she wasted not a cent in her granddaughter’s education, moving to a more upscale house in Brewer Heights once she got her under her care. She was always the one with everything and Lee remembered seeing her while still an officer driving around a brand new glossy red car, hair loose through the wind. In all honesty, he thought her never too leave town but as she reached her tender 21st year of life, she left leaving everything behind. 

He parked outside her grandmother’s home, stopping just a bit away from it looking at the house that was so eerily sketched in his mind. He leaned against his seat watching Brewer Heights, the place he so wanted to have lived in his youth. Of course he now owned a place there too but it was faint, fickle. If he were to not be sheriff anymore all would shatter. He would do everything he could to keep his position. He deserved it, he deserved it more than any damned soul on this planet. A knock on the glass removed him from his mind state as he looked the way of his window to see her. 

     - Can I come in? - she asked, eyes lingering on the passenger seat. He stretched over to the side, opening the door for her but not exiting the car. She entered, closing the door as she sat on the seat. - I’ve always hated when you were mad at me. 

     - I’m not mad.

     - You have no reason to be. I know what you’re mad about and it’s your own fault, you know that.

     - Is it my fault you left? - his hands tightened against the wheel of his cruiser, anger coursing through his veins. Lee never liked to hear the truth.

    - She knew, Lee and she was right ... If anyone knew, if the town knew I would’ve been ruined and I didn’t deserve that. You must understand I didn’t deserve that. 

    - I didn’t deserve you leaving without saying a fucking thing now did I, darl’?

    - You were married. - she almost spat the words in his face. - You are married, Lee. Now you can be mad at me all you want, you can hate me for all I give a damn but I was not gonna destroy myself for your happiness, and I will certainly not allow you to destroy yourself for lust. 

    - Y/N ...

    - I don’t need your help anymore and I would enjoy it if you parked your cruiser away from my house. I wouldn’t want any rumours about your infidelities to resurface. - she exited the car and climbed the small incline of grass up to her home. Lee still remembered seeing her in a little white dresses her grandmother would buy for her, climbing that incline while holding the fabric so it wouldn’t fly up. She seemed to have gotten the hang of it.

Lee had met Y/N when she volunteered at the station back when he was still a patrol officer. She did the duties of every single secretary plus cleaning which was what she had volunteered for. It’ll be good for my university application, she told him when Lee asked what she was doing there. She started at 17 and remained there until she was 18 and ready to leave and become something other than a Knockemstiff resident. However, her mother having sudden heart attack ruined her plans and she decided to stay to take care of her. Lee didn’t see her for two whole years until she was 20 years old and he spotted her at the supermarket getting an earful from Mr. Collins about dropping a bottle of olive oil while trying to reach something from the higher shelf. Lee didn’t like it, he didn’t like Mr. Collins berating her for a simple mistake so he stepped in. He remembered her thanking him before reintroducing herself to him. 

He wasn’t one to be swayed by women, he’d married his Jane when he was fresh out of high school and while his relationship was more than stale, he had his mind on work and alcohol. Sure he could’ve divorced, found someone else but he wasn’t the teenager he used to be anymore, he was hardly someone who women would be attracted to besides a single man for a Sheriff? That surely wasn’t gonna happen. Yet, he couldn’t help but be entranced by her, fresh into adulthood with a mind full of ideas about what she wanted to do. He didn’t mean it, he didn’t mean to start a relationship with her, to start an affair yet he couldn’t say he regret it. He didn’t regret the nights where she’d meet him in the woods, covered by a black trench coat. He could still feel his, his hands against her back, feeling the fabric of her undergarments as the windows fogged. 

Y/N was upset. Her friends had told her she better not expect the man who she had left without any notice to help her but she was upset. What choice did she have? After her grandmother heard about it, it would’ve taken no time for everyone in town to hear about it and she would’ve been a disgrace and Lee would’ve certain not become Sheriff. Nevertheless she was upset. Instead, she asked an old friend from school, Billy. It was no surprise he was here, nobody left, nobody ever left. She had left but yet here she was once again, 4 years later wondering about an affair which shouldn’t have happened. Her grandmother had berated her for ages “you don’t sleep with a married man” and of course she knew she shouldn’t yet she had. She didn’t know better. 

She had boxes and boxes packed with whatever it was left of the house, photo books, clothing, bedding, all of it packed. Once she got to New York she could sort through it but right now all she wanted to was leave. Her friends even offered to come over and do it for her but the damned lawyer said it had to be her. In the morning she waited for Billy in the steps of her home, dressed in one of her old 50′s fashioned white dress, a far cry from the mini skirts she used at home and off he came in the exact same car he had when they were both teens. 

   - Y/N, look at you. - he walked off the car. - You look gorgeous, darl’. 

   - Thank you, Billy. - she scratched the back of her head. - Uhm it’s only 5 big boxes. I’ll pay for the gas if you help me take them to post office. 

   - You’re not keeping the house?

   - And live in Knockemstiff? - she rolled her eyes, climbing up the stairs to grab the boxes from the front of the door. The boy helped her pack the car before the two hopped onto the car. - So, how’s the town been?

   - Nothing changes. Mr. Collins died, no one was upset about it and that Bodecker guy became Sheriff. - he light up a cigarette as he turned on the engine. - It’s still as boring as its been and people mostly gossip around the same old gossip.

   - What’s new in gossip?

   - Eleanor still says you and Bodecker were fucking. - he chuckled. - As if ... I mean, look at you, you were prom queen and he’s a fat bastard. 

    - You should watch your mouth, Billy. He’s the sheriff. 

    - Because he bought it. - he shrugged. - Dad says he’s pretty much doing everyone’s dirty work. I mean his sister and her husband disappeared and were found dead. 

    -  I don’t really care for that type of gossip. - she leaned against the seat, watching the trees pass by. It wasn’t that she and Billy were good friends but she needed help and she’d rather die than go beg Lee to help her out. She had tried and it’d failed. Besides what was the worse that could happen?

The worse that could happen became very clear as instead of driving into town he took a left into the woods. She rose her head from the seat as all the ways one could reach town rushed through her mind. This definitely wasn’t one of them, it was hard to even get to the town through the woods. She knew that because, well ... it was where she would meet Lee to ensure no one from town found them. The car came to a stop and Billy got off the car. Maybe he just needed to pee or to get some air. She waited til he was on his back to open the car door and start running but he rushed after her, grabbing her arm and throwing her to the ground before standing over her, hands holding her wrists above her head.

   - Billy, what are you doing? - stay calm, that was what they always taught her, stay calm. 

   - Come on, Y/N. They always wanted us to be together in high school, remember? 

   - I don’t know what you’re talking about. Billy, calm down. 

   - You fucking calm down. I know you want me too, Y/N. You called me, you need my help, darl’. I can make you feel so damn good ... - his mouth lowered down and she started to trash around, trying to get rid of him. 

   - Stop, please stop. - she looked up at the sky, the morning sun barely up as she recalled why you don’t come back to Knockemstiff. You don’t get back because you get stuck. As she convinced herself there was nothing the do, a short was heard through the air. 

  - What the heck are you doing William? - she recognised the voice. She had never been more grateful for that voice. Billy jumped over to his feet.

   - Sheriff ... me and Y/N were just having a bit of fun ... You know, you understand, right?

   - Y/N ... - he looked her way. - What were you doing?

   - It was against my will, Sheriff. - she climbed onto her feet, leaning against a tree at a healthy distance from him.

  - Get the fuck out of here. - the young boy in his mid 20′s rushed out like a child afraid of the dark, forgetting his car and everything he had left behind. Y/N watched him running, tripping onto his legs as Lee fired a warning shot in the air. If this was NY, there would be someone here already but this was Knockemstiff and gun shots were as usual as rain during winter.

He smirked, happy to have once again imposed the authority he so much treasured. Lee never liked Billy, he never liked when he’d drive Y/N home from school even when she was volunteering at the police station. That boy was no good news and always looked at her like she was a piece of meat. Lee still remembered the old Sheriff telling her that boy was no good and looking at her now, dressed in one of her white dresses stained in dirty and green grass stains, he guessed he was right. 

  - Billy, Y/N? Don’t you have other friends?

  - Billy’s the only one with a car. - Y/N mumbled as she grabbed his keys from the floor to take her stuff off his car before he could return. - Thank you but I had it under control.

  - ‘Course you did. - he put his hands on his waist. - Come on, I’ll drive you to wherever you want to go.

  - I don’t want any favours from you, Sheriff Bodecker. - she held her boxes against her chest. Well, if she started now maybe she could be at the post office with all the boxes at nighttime. - That’ll be all.

  - Y/N, come on. I’m a public server so let me help you.

  - I don’t want your help. - she almost barked at him, taking another box from Billy’s car. Maybe she could drive the car, yet again she knew the captain particularly liked Billy and could fine her if 

  - Fine, can you tell me what you’re doing at least?

  - I’m shipping these boxes to New York. I don’t have time to completely go through them so ...

  - Put them in the cruiser. I’ll take them to the post office and take you home. 

  - I don’t want any favours.

  - It’s not for you, it’s for your grandmother. Now get into the car, please. - he opened the door to her.

Y/N huffed. The last thing she needed was a favour from Lee Bodecker yet in all honesty she had no other choice. She packed her boxes into the truck of his cruiser and sat on the passenger seat, arms crossed as he sat in the driver’s seat. Her mind played tricks on her, reminding her of what they used to do in that driver’s seat of his back when she was younger and full of ideas for the future. She shouldn’t have done it and she knew it, Jane Bodecker wasn’t the best woman but she didn’t deserve having her husband sneaking around with a 20 year old despite her herself having had her fair share of affairs. Not that Lee knew and she wasn’t gonna be the one to tell him about the time she was working late in the station and saw his wife getting busy with a new patrol. She didn’t have that right, after all he was doing the same to her. She shouldn’t have done it, nevertheless. Her grandmother died ashamed of her and now she had to deal with it. 

   - Billy said Sandy died. Is it true? 

   - Yeah, last year.

   - Oh ... I’m sorry, I didn’t know. 

   - She had it coming. That weird husband of hers ended up driving her off the edge. That Arvin kid shot them yet I can’t say they hadn’t it coming ... She was still my baby sister. 

   - I’m sorry, Lee. I’m so sorry ...  - she looked down at her skirt. 

   - Almost got me too ... stupid kid. - he shrugged. - Good thing I was fat enough to stop the bullet, I guess.

   - Well, I’m sorry about Sandy. - she said as she saw her house become clearer through the window. He stopped in front of her home, unlocking the doors so she could walk out. 

Y/N walked out before she could do something stupid. Whatever she did, whatever he had, whenever they were together she always ended up doing something stupid. She sat in the empty house of her childhood, only now containing furniture. She could remember it so well from her years as a child running up and down the stairs, not knowing what awaited her outside the world. Nevertheless, she didn’t want to owe anything to Lee. She knew who he had to answer softly too, she knew those men Billy spoke about. They always ran for Sheriff ever since she was a kid. 

She looked at the clock on the wall, 3PM. She knew exactly where those men would be at that time and so she changed and took her way downtown. Everyone turned their head as she walked into the badly light, old bar in tones of musky green which greatly contrasted with her baby blue short dress. The town had gotten stuck in the 40′s and 50′s, women barely showing their legs or any skin and there she was, a woman born and raised in Knockemstiff dressed like a movie star. The table of three men clearly noticed, the under-sheriff, the division chief and the captain. She stood in front of the round table, taking her sunglasses and setting them on top of her head, a nice, covergirl smile on her pink painted lips. You can get the girl out of Knockemstiff but you can’t get Knockemstiff out of the girl.

    - Hello boys. You mind if I seat with you? - she put her hand on one of the chairs. 

    - Hey, you’re Elizabeth’s granddaughter aren’t you? - Frank, the under-sheriff asked, pulling the chair for her. - I thought you were in New York.

    - I was but I just came here because of my grandma’s inheritance, but I have something to discuss. 

Another night, another day of useless parading around for Lee. He’d pass by the post office and shipped Y/N’s boxes and that had been the highlight of his day. As per usual, he made his way to the bar only to found the environment was slightly different. He knew this town like the back of his hand, anything off always rang alarm bells. As the bartender placed his usual poison in front of him, he decided to get to the bottom of the situation. 

   - Why’s everything so quiet?

   - I don’t know, Sheriff. - the man replied while cleaning glasses. - Elizabeth’s girl was here and I don’t know what she did but Frank, Jonah and Fitzwilliam left as if she were the devil.

Fucking hell. He drowned the last of his drink before grabbing his hat and entering his cruise. Damned Y/N, she used to be such a nice girl before leaving to New York. God, the only complaint he ever got about her was when the mayor complained about her wanting to run a march. He drove to her home like a mad man. What was she doing messing around with those three? He’d seen them do worse things for much less. Lee climbed the grass patch up to her door, knocking on it as if his life depended on it. 

   - Y/N, open up. Right now. - he thumped the door again. - I’ll break in if you don’t answer it!

   - Jesus. - the door opened up to Y/N dressed in what he was almost entirely sure was the shortest dress he had ever seen a woman wear. She stood against the door, hand on the wood while the other on her waist as he entered her home. 

   - Took you long enough. - he stepped into the home which he had never dared to step in.

   - I was upstairs. - she closed the door, locking it behind her for good safety. No one can be trusted in this godforsaken town. - What do you want?

Lee walked further into the house ignoring her question as he shut all the windows of the ground floor, anything that could allow anyone to look inside the house. Last thing he needed was for anyone to see inside the home and start any rumours. Stupid bastards. Y/N followed him around asking the same damn question anytime he shut any window and pulled any drapes down. 

   - Stop touching my stuff. - she put herself in front of him. - What do you want, Lee?

   - What do I want? - he sat against the couch, sighing. - What the fuck did you do, Y/N? Why were you at the bar?

   - I didn’t do anything. - she batted her eyes innocently. 

   - Y/N, I have another election coming up soon. I’ll ask again, what did you do at the bar?

   - It’s none of your business. 

   - Y/N, I’ve seen those men kill for less so you tell me now what you did. 

   - Stop ordering me around. - she rolled her eyes at him. - I don’t like owing anyone so now we’re even.

   - We’re even? - he pitched the skin of his nose. - What the fuck, Y/N? 

   - You wanna know what I said? Would that make you feel better? Would that make you feel like you rule this damn town, Lee? - she looked down on him, almost teasing him. Had it been a few years ago she would’ve been under him already. - I helped you out.

   - Y/N ...

   - It’s not just you who was sleeping around with a younger girl. They were sleeping around with friends of mine. The only difference is I have evidence of it ... - she grabbed her purse from the hanger, taking a beige envelope from it and throwing it his way. Lee looked up to her and then to the envelope opening it to see various pictures of girls he knew in compromising positions with his opponents, letters, everything. - They don’t have anything on you because unlike my friends, I don’t keep souvenirs from my affairs. 

  - You blackmailed them? Are you stupid, Y/N? They are going to kill you.

  - Please. - she rolled her eyes at him. - My grandmother owned half this town, if I die everything goes to charity and this town falls apart. Besides, it’s not like I’m planning to stick around for longer. 

  - So what now? You had fun playing femme fatale? You’re bored, is that it?

  - I just won you an election without any competition, Lee. You could be nicer about it. 

  - I don’t need your help. 

  - I don’t need your help either. I was just repaying a favour. - she leaned against the wall. - You can go now. 

   - Did you need to wear that? - he pointed at the dress. - Couldn’t have struck blackmail dressed appropriately?

   - Do you not like my dress? - she looked down, hands grabbing the baby blue fabric as she expanded the flowey skirt. - You know, I bought it for you. I was planning on using it for birthday a few years ago but you know ... had to leave earlier.

   - You bought that dress for me? - he rose from the couch, walking up to her until he had her caged against the wall.

   - I bought it so you could take it off, actually. - Lee must’ve been hallucinating because he swore she was pouting.

She looked up at him with that look she used to give him after a long day at work when he needed something to unwind. Both of them had promised each other not to do anything else when she left, Y/N had told herself no more coming bak and Lee had decided to spend his life content what whatever shred of marriage he had. Yet, she was there in what looked more like lingerie than a dress and he was in uniform, both of them were never good at making good decisions, and this was Knockemstiff. Lee took the first move, leaning down to kiss her like his body dependent on it which in some way he did. She held onto his shoulder, flushing her body against his as his hands started trying to pull the dress away from her body. Baby blue fabric flowed to the ground as he picked her up, throwing her against the couch he had just been sat on. He stopped kissing her to look at her, to look at the body he still dreamed at night or whenever he shut his eyes. She could’ve been gone for 4 years but she sure never left his wildest fantasies. 

  - Lee, wait. - her hands stopped him from returning to kiss her. - Let me treat you, please.

  - Oh sugar, you don’t need to ask. - she got up, walking slowly past him, her matching baby blue undergarments much more racy than what she used to wear back in Knockemstiff. She pushed him against the couch, smirking as she went down on her knees. - What are you doing down there, sugar? It’s more than you can handle. 

  - Don’t worry, Sheriff. I’m a big girl. - her hands unbuckled the belt off his trousers, throwing it to the floor followed by his trousers. She peppered kisses over his thighs down to his knees and then to the edge of his underwear. Slowly, she peeled them away, making eye contact with him. The silent girl he had known before was definitely long gone and he didn’t know how to feel about it. Before he could make up his mind, she took him entirely inside inside her mouth. - Fuck, you look fucking flawless with my big cock in your mouth, sugar.

She smiled at his praise, moving her head up and down still at a painfully slow pace, his balls in her hands. Lee pushed his head back, groaning at her motions and thinking it could no get better until she started to move her head faster, his tip reaching the back of her throat, but it didn’t seem to bother her. Instead she moaned against him, the vibrations making him feel like he was on cloud 9. Fuck being sheriff, nothing made him quite higher than having the one who got away with his cock down her throat. He started twitching against her mouth, his hand grabbed a handful of her hair, pushing her against his pelvis and starting to control her moves. She kept moaning against him, bringing him over the edge until he just couldn’t hold himself anymore. His grip loosened on her head as his muscles gave up on him.

Y/N got up from her kneeling position, thumb pushing whatever cum had spilled over into her mouth. That image alone made him harden up again like some horny teenage boy. She smiled at him, hands on his shoulders as she sat on his lap. 

   - What do you want me to do, Sheriff? - she batted her eyes at him, leaning down to kiss his ear lobe lowering down to his neck. 

  - You wanna ride my cock, sugar? - he hooked his hand on her nape, pushing her so she was looking at him. - You wanna make up to me for leaving me all alone?

  - Yes, Sheriff. - she lined up and slowly sunk down on him, both of them moaning. 

   - Come on, sugar. Show me what you can do. - she started riding him as if the devil had possessed her. He pushed her lips against his, a sloppy messy kiss which definitely was more lust than anything else as she moved up and down against him.  - Yeah, you like that don’t you, sugar? Tell me you like it, sugar. 

  - It feels so good, Lee. - she leaned against him, her hips still moving as he pulled her bra down, pinching her nipple. - Fuck.

  - You’re never gonna leave me again. - he started thrusting up, moving her from under him so she was laid across the couch. - Promis ... fuck ... promise me, sugar. Promise, you’re not gonna leave.

  - Lee ... - she moaned against the couch’s pillow as he speed up his pace, hands holding her hips and moving them against and away from him. 

  - You’re not gonna leave. - he groaned, feeling the way her walls milked him with such need. - You’re not gonna leave me, sugar. You’re not, right? You’re gonna stay.

   - Lee ... - she cried out before her mouth opened up in a perfect O, her orgasm washing over her. He didn’t take too long to cum, groaning like a wild animal as strings of white painted her walls. He slipped out of her, holding her before turning so she was standing on top of him. - Lee, I can’t stay. You know that, right? 

   - Why not? Things were good when you were around. 

   - I left for a reason, Lee. - she got up from him, grabbing her dress and quickly slipping it on. - And that reason still stands. 

   - Y/N, please listen ...

   - When I was 20 and we started this, I truly believed you were going to divorce your wife. You were going to divorce her and you were gonna marry me and ... and my grandma would’ve been upset but she would’ve learned to deal with it and then she would’ve taken me to the altar. I waited a year to see if I would ever become something other than a mistress and then the elections came around and I understood you were not gonna divorce Jane. You were going to be Sheriff and you’re still going to be Sheriff and maybe sometime Mayor. I’m not gonna be your mistress anymore, Lee.

  - Y/N ...

  - Please, leave. - she wiped whatever tears were threatening to fall off. Lee furrowed his brow, putting on his trousers before trying to approach her but she stopped him, arm raised firmly keeping distance. - Please, leave.

  - Y/N, c’mon. Let’s talk.

  - LEAVE! - she rose her tone at him. Lee wasn’t going to argue with her, it wasn’t his place to argue with her at her own house and so he left. Y/N stayed in the middle of her leaving room, arms crossed until she broke down crying.

She could almost hear her grandmother’s words “there’s no use crying about it” when she told her Lee was running for Sheriff. Funny how even after being dead, the old nag still was as right as she was four years ago. She wiped her tears with her hand and climbed the stairs up to her bedroom, sitting on the bare bed. It was going to be alright, tomorrow she’d be able to sign the rights over to the letting agency and could return to New York. Things were fine there, or at least she wasn’t sleeping with a married man there.

The sun didn’t raise up that morning, rain instead replaced it and so Y/N remained laid in bed watching the rain drop rush down the fogged up windows until a loud thumping on her door forced her to get up. She wrapped herself in her robe and went down the stairs to open the door. 

  - Good morning, miss. - she opened the door to her letting agent. - How are you?

  - I’m alright, Don. I’m sorry, I thought the open house was later. I’ll just get my stuff and leave.

  - No, it’s all right miss. I am just here to tell you that we’ve sold the house was above the price you were asking for.

  - Pardon me?

  - At least two times the asking price. It was such a good price, he had to take it. Paid upfront.

  - What really? Who?

  - He should be coming to see the place in an hour. - he said. - We’ll bring you the check later on. 

  - All right. Thank you Don.

That was good news at least she got to leave Knockemstiff before anything else happened. She didn’t know what had overcome her to decide to have sex with Lee. Pull yourself together Y/N, you’ve had four years to learn how to deal with it. It was fine, it was going to be fine. She packed whatever was left of her stuff into her small patched up luggage and put it by the door. She just needed to wait for Don to bring her check back and she could go on back to New York, where her mistakes only included putting coloured clothes with whites and then having pink clothes for the rest of her life. A knock on the door made that decision come much faster. Okay, Y/N. Get the check and go.

  - Lee? - she opened the door to see the least person she wanted to see. - Go away, I’m expecting someone.

  - I know. - he walked in as if the house was his. - You’re expecting me.

  - This is not funny, Lee. Don should be bringing my check anytime and the owner will be here in an hour.

  - Yeah, I’m sorry I’m early.

  - Pardon? - she rose her eyebrows at his statement. - What do you mean?

  - It’s my house now. I was thinking of upgrading, ya know? This house is the best one in Brewer Heights after all.

  - Are you fucking kidding me, Lee?! - she stood in front of him before he could walk further into her home. - You’re bringing your wife into my childhood home? YOU’RE BRINGING YOUR WIFE TO YOUR MISTRESS’S HOME?!

  - How many bedrooms is this house? They said they thought it was over five in the contract. 

  - You have a perfectly good house. Why do you want mine?

  - Mine is too small. Only one bedroom, I’d have no place to build a nursery.

  - A nursery? You and your wife are having a baby? In my childhood home ... how swell. 

  - You know I’m thinking about running for mayor. I mean, it’d look good if I had a family.

  - Good luck convincing Jane. - she gave him a cynical smile. 

  - I don’t have to convince Jane. I’d have to convince you. 

  - Me? Fuck off, Lee. I’m not having a baby for you and your wife. Fuck off. 

  - We’re a good team, Y/N. Besides, Jane is no longer in the picture.

  - Lee ... - she sighed. - Please.

  - You see, my wife isn’t as good as me at keeping her infidelities casual. The other candidates have caught wind of it ... I need someone who’s almost as good at blackmail as me.

  - I’m better at blackmail than you. - she crossed her arms at him.

  - So what do you say, sugar? Want to be the sheriff’s wife?

  - Do you promise I’ll get to be the mayor’s wife someday? 

  - With you on my team, I think you’re gonna be the mayor’s wife sooner than you think.

taglist: @buckysteveloki-me​ 

#sebastian stan #sheriff lee bodecker #lee bodecker #sebastian stan/reader #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan/you #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan/y/n #sebastian stan x y/n #lee bodecker x reader #lee bodecker/reader #lee bodecker/y/n #lee bodecker x y/n #lee bodecker/you #lee bodecker x you #sheriff lee bodecker x you #sheriff lee bodecker x reader #sheriff lee bodecker imagine #sheriff lee bodecker fanfic #sheriff lee bodecker smut #lee bodecker smut #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan imagine

[qslovebot]

Midnight Escapade: Spencer Reid

Summary: Spencer Reid and the reader have been crushing on each other since they met, but neither of them cared to admit it. When doubled up in a hotel room for the night, reader tries to convince Spencer to go with her at 12:30am to get frozen yogurt to cheer him up and it turns into much more than a snack run.

Pairing: Spencer x Fem!Reader

Warnings/Includes: Swearing, mutual pining (a long time of pining leads up to this fic), food, mention of Sept 11, 2001, self-doubt, fluff, kissing

Word Count: 4533

The case was solved, closed, and finally, your eyes could rest. The case you had just finished was particularly stressful to not only you, but your fellow BAU members as well. You all hadn't slept for nearly twenty-nine hours and Hotch decided it was best you all got the rest you deserved at a nearby hotel.

The ride there, you struggled to keep your eyes open, but Spencer Reid was on another greatly interesting rant about a show he liked, so you figured you would try to stay awake to hear it. You always listened to him because a lot of the time, the rest of the team dismissed him and his oddly accurate monologues. They grew tired of Spencer talking so much about things they didn't understand but you were rather the opposite- and that's probably because you liked Spencer so much.

The two of you met when he was introduced to the BAU. Praised for his mind, he introduced himself to you with a shaky voice and a meek handshake. You instantly admired him from his geeky personality outwards to his tall, thin self with a face sculpted by artists. Little did you know he did the same, but immediately thought of you as out of his league, so he stayed quiet.

You had been friends since then, pairing up on cases as your minds seemed to work like a perfectly oiled machine when together. Like Penelope and Derek, you two were known for the science jokes no one understood and shared looks of adoration that the both of you somehow didn't recognize as romantic. But everyone else saw it.

Derek Morgan teased a lot. He talked to Reid about working with the 'pretty girl' every day, poking him in the side and messing with his hair. The geek and the girl who was smart as hell, but didn't make it her dominant trait.

A doctor and the outgoing agent who matched the loudness of Penelope Garcia at times at karaoke night. You brought more liveliness to the BAU- more music, more spinning, more levity in dark cases. Spencer was always trying to hide a smile when you walked in, trying to pretend he hadn't been waiting for you to bring him coffee each morning. You didn't need an eidetic memory to remember his order and that, for some reason, always sent him over the moon.

But you were here now, listening to him wrap up his story as you fought the sleep that was looming over you as the car came to a stop outside the hotel.

"-And that was the end of it all. I think it's so fascinating how they wrapped everything up into this intricate timeline of interactions and moments and backtracks. We should, uh, watch it sometime." He said as he hopped out of the back, holding his small bag and yours.

You sleepily hopped out after him, hoping you didn't look like you felt, because you truly felt like hell. "Yeah, I'd like that," was all you could really mumble out. He passed you your bag and you smiled your thank you.

Emily held you up by the shoulders as Hotch sent through the check-in information. "Some case, huh?" She laughed as you rubbed your left eye. "I suppose we can't make this a girl's night of post-case celebration if you're dead asleep."

You groaned, "You wanted to do that? Damn it, Em, I'm sorry-"

"You need beauty sleep, (Y/N). I'm not mad or anything, I'll just take a bath and pull out an adult romance novel." A smirk played on her lips as she raised her eyebrows. You chuckled tiredly. "Seriously, no worries."

"Did I hear talk of a romance novel?" Derek shuffled over. "Which one are we reading? 50 Shades of Grey?"

Spencer stepped in, "Did you know that 50 Shades of Grey is actually fanfiction written about Stephanie Meyer's Twilight Saga? If you go further back, Stephanie started Twilight as written alternate universe fanfiction where the emo-slash-hardcore band My Chemical Romance were all vampires. But My Chemical Romance was started by musician and comic book creator- who published a series of comics called The Umbrella Academy in 2008, unrelated, his name was - Gerard Way, who created the band to make music that expressed the trauma he was given from witnessing the twin towers falling on September 11th, 2001."

Emily looked at him, jaw open. "So Nine-Eleven essentially created a badly-written and toxic sex novel, years later?"

Spencer nodded, eyes flickering to you for a brief moment. Derek grinned at Emily, "So you have read 50 Shades of Grey, huh?" He teased. She swat at his wiggly fingers away as Hotch walked over, brow furrowed.

"Rooms need to be doubled up tonight. Morgan, you can come with me. As much as you may hate it, I feel like (Y/L/N) here might collapse on the spot, so we can't go anywhere else." He handed Spencer and Emily a key, expecting them to make their own choices. Of course, Emily knew exactly what she needed to do when Hotch walked off. You were about to turn and go with her, but she bolted off, reaching for JJ.

You looked up at Spencer Reid who had his mouth in a shy, straight-lipped smile. You both knew what this meant, but you were glad you'd get to crash somewhere, floor or not. The room was on the fifth floor, so you took the elevator with Spencer in silence that you were sure he was granting you until you reached the door of your room.

"I will... take the floor tonight," he said, sticking the key in the lock. "You're tired and I'm just going to get dinner and um... read."

His watch read 4:34 pm- it was so much earlier than you had thought, but you were almost collapsing. "I'm sorry," were the last words you could reply with before you walked into the room, got into the bed, and you were out, cold.

You had never had such a fulfilling sleep. You woke up feeling clean, fresh, renewed and restored. There was no groggy feeling that you had accidentally travelled to another dimension while asleep. The room was dim, except for the lamp that was on in the right corner.

When you peered over the edge of the bed, there was Spencer, laying on his stomach with few pillows under his chest and elbows, a book in his hands. He looked peaceful, quiet, calm. "Spence," you whispered. He practically jumped out of his skin and you couldn't help but laugh. "Oh my god, I'm sorry." You grinned.

He smiled sheepishly, setting down his book. "You're awake."

You nodded back, "How long was I out?"

"Since 4:34, so... 8 hours and 20 minutes. It's only 12:22am." Spencer sat up and against the wall while you adjusted yourself to sit cross-legged. You were still in your clothes from earlier and it surprised you to see Spencer in less preppy clothing.

Well, less preppy for him. No cardigan, no dress shirt, just a t-shirt that read 'math is as easy as pi' with the pi symbol made of cherry pie and his regular khaki pants. "Aren't you tired?" you asked, smiling from his shirt, back to him.

"No, uh, I actually got about four hours in the middle of your eight. I usually don't dream anymore but I actually dreamt I was falling, which is a sign of..." he stopped himself, but he was with another profiler, what was the use, you could already fill in the blanks. He continued, "Which is a sign of insecurity and inferiority, but I don't believe in dream analysis..."

You furrowed your brow, watching his eyes look down at his hands. "Are you feeling insecure and inferior, Dr.Reid, because need I remind you that 99% of the time, it's your brain that leads us to solve the cases."

He shook his head, "Thinking myself over, I'd-I'd say it doesn't revolve around work." The stutter was back. He hadn't talked to you with a stutter in months, you'd assumed it was just because he wasn't as comfortable around you then, but now it was back. Spencer Reid needed to be cheered up, something was wrong.

"Well you know you can tell me anything, right? I've kept secrets about my friends since grade one, I can keep yours." You slipped off of the bed and walked to your bag on the table in the far corner. You could feel Spencer's eyes on you as you went, so you shot him a smile over your shoulder. He reverted back to looking at his hands.

Through situations and being friends, you knew Spencer was insecure. He was bullied constantly as a child, some going as far as to strip him down and beat him. Disgusting, self-esteem-ruining acts you wished you could remove from his eidetic memory.

You took off your button-up blouse to stay in your white t-shirt that lay underneath. You hadn't the time to remove it before falling asleep. Thinking about that- you probably had bedhead too. Your balled-up shirt was shoved into your bag and you pulled out a brush in exchange, to get the knots out of your hair.

"I could really go for frozen yogurt right now," you said, running the wooden brush through your hair. Spencer narrowed his eyes at you, a little confused. "I haven't eaten dinner."

"It's nearly 12:30 am..." Spencer said. It looked like he was running through his vast mind to find a scientific explanation as to why you might have wanted frozen yogurt at half-past midnight. You let him, a teasing smile on your lips as you pulled the top bit of your hair up. "Are you pregnant?" He asked, out of the blue, entirely serious. Seemed like the only logical explanation he could find. You nearly choked on the air.

"No, Spencer, I am not pregnant!" You laughed. His face tightened as he went back to searching his mind. "I just want frozen yogurt. Regular cravings, not... pregnancy cravings. Are you coming?"

He looked at you, oddly surprised he was invited. "Why?"

"Why not?" You picked up his jacket from the hook and tossed it to him. "Nobody has to see your cheesy math shirt."

He smiled sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck, but went right back to being analytical, a mumbling rant with hand gestures.

"The average half-cup serving of frozen yogurt alone has about 17.3 grams of sugar and plus various toppings, the sugar is upped to at least 25 grams. But, versus a half-cup serving of vanilla ice cream, the sugar is only about 14 grams and with toppings can be upped to about 22. Fat-wise-"

You interrupted him because this was seemingly the only way to lift his mood and he was making excuses to stay here and wallow. "Come on, for once, let's be able to act like the youngest members of the team. Once, Spence. I don't need a play-by-play on how much sugar is in it- though I did find that interesting-I just want frozen yogurt and I would like you to come with me. I'll pay for yours if you want any, just... please?"

He met your eyes with a curl falling down his forehead and quickly looked back at his hands. You'd been friends for nearly a year and four months and he still couldn't look you in the eyes for long. He really wasn't good at refusing you at all, either.

Spencer nodded and you practically beamed. Maybe this would help to take his mind off of what was bothering him, even if the distraction was brief. You jumped on the spot and slipped on your own jacket and grabbed your wallet, ready to go and by the door.

He had a small smile when the two of you stepped out, his hands behind his back. You locked the door behind you and the two of you walked silently to the elevator, careful not to accidentally wake anyone else in case they decided to peer out into the hall.

In the elevator, you turned and looked up at Spencer who was fiddling with his hands. "You look nervous, Spence. It's frozen yogurt, not a pretty girl."

"Well I'm with-" he stopped himself again and actually started laughing his breathy laugh, squeezing his own hand so hard his knuckles turned white while his cheeks and nose went a little pink. "You..." He finished, rocking on his heels.

You scrunched your nose, shaking your head. Though you mentally disagreed with him sometimes on your appearance, you smiled and looked back up at him. "Thank you. You're pretty too."

He shrugged himself further into his jacket, hands still wildly fidgeting. "Thank you..."

You both stepped out of the elevator the moment it got to the ground floor, looking for air that wasn't filled with odd tension neither of you could explain. You two walked through the lobby and into the cool midnight air outside, where things were open, dark, and still.

You shut your eyes for a moment and opened your arms to face the gentle, cool wind that blew your hair and hit your face gently. Inhaling deeply, you opened your eyes again to Spencer in a similar state, but much less relaxed looking. Instead, it looked like he was trying to calm himself down.

"Spence, you look out of it," you said, folding your arms over your chest. You had gotten him outside, now maybe instead of distracting him from whatever it was, you could help him through it. It was part of being a friend- profiling wasn't needed to see he was thinking long and hard over something that bothered him. "You can tell me what's wrong."

He started walking down the street toward the neon lights that shone bright with the word 'fro-yo', you stepped quickly to follow. "If I like a girl.. h-how am I supposed to go about telling her?" He asked, not even looking at you. His forehead was creased and his hands in his jacket pockets.

So this was about a girl he liked. Spencer Reid had a crush. Of course, you were oblivious it was you, but Spencer Reid was romantically interested in someone!

Yay?

An odd feeling of happiness came with finding this out and there was an uprising feeling within you like the first drop on a rollercoaster, but it lingered... and it was much less happy. You ignored it, of course, letting your outer emotions display themselves.

"Dr. Spencer Reid, the human encyclopedia- have you finally found a girl that puts you at a loss for words?" You teased, pressing the back of your hand to your head for dramatic effect, struggling to keep up with him.

His mouth twitched, "Maybe."

"Well, to be honest, Spence, just... tell her. Just go at it- ask to kiss her, maybe, then confess after. Or... or, you could confess, see how she takes it, then you can see if you should or shouldn't kiss her based off of if you get rejected or not." You told him, catching him by the shoulder to get him to slow down at the entrance of the frozen yogurt place.

He was much taller than you, so that came with him being that much faster, but that didn't matter now, he had stopped. Spencer looked at you, concern in his eyes, panic. You smiled kindly, "She won't reject you. I don't know any girl who would even think of it." Reassurance, because he needed it.

His eyes trailed to the ground and he ran a hand through his hair, opening the door for you. "And w-what do I say?" Spencer asked when you both went inside. You were the only two there and the cashier must have been in the back room.

You hopped over to the flavours, "I mean, whatever feels right, Spence. If you feel like going on a long, romantic, poet-written rant about how much you like her, do that. If you're afraid to bore her, you can wait for her to speak, but the truth is if she can't listen to you rant, she probably isn't worth going for."

He evaluated your words while you casually got yourself vanilla frozen yogurt. He also scanned the flavours, probably mentally shaming the company for marketing this as somewhat healthier. You giggled watching him try to figure out how to get the yogurt out of the machine as you put raspberries in yours.

"(Y/N), uh..." he said quietly, gesturing you over. The genius's mind was scrambled enough to miss the lever in front of him. You took his cup from him and pulled the lever, to which he made an 'o' shape with his mouth and nodded comprehensively.

"Chocolate mocha," you smiled, handing it to him as he stood there sheepishly again. "Good choice."

You spun back to your yogurt, adding a bit of honey over the top of it all. He followed, choosing raspberries as well, silently adding them. He still didn't seem at rest with the girl thing, you noticed by the way he was failing to open the scoop-box of cookie crumbs. He had long fingers, usually nimble ones, but not so much right now. Spencer was too stressed to work properly. Error in the system, you may have joked if things weren't so bad with him.

When you were both finished, Spencer tapped the little service bell on the desk and a little woman, maybe mid-30s came out wearing the merchandise of the shop. You both placed your cups on the scale and she weighed them for the price, but both you and Spencer pulled out your wallets.

He put his card out faster, so you swat his hand with your card and paid while he mumbled "Ow..." Of course, you checked to see if he was really hurt, but he had his small, crooked smile back on his face. He was okay, maybe he was feeling better?

Saying good morning/night to the lady, you both stepped back into the midnight air, starting to walk, but not back toward the hotel. You'd think with what cases you two had worked on you'd be a little warier, but with each other, you both felt safe. You walked a few steps, eating your yogurt, before Spencer spoke up again. "Is it a bad thing I'm so clueless as to what women like? Everything I know about women is scientific. Chocolate releases endorphins, flowers are associated with beauty and love, but... other than that... I don't know anything."

You swallowed your bite as Reid took his, waiting on your answer. Just as you always listened to him, he always listened to you. He probably valued your opinion over Derek's at times. You waved your spoon in the air when you spoke, "I wouldn't say bad. Everyone starts somewhere for everything. If anything, a man who is willing to learn is more attractive than one who wings it and doesn't ask comprehensive questions to up the relationship quality."

"Asking questions, got it. Should my confession include a gesture, though?" He spoke with his mouth full. Spencer really wanted to get this right- it was admirable. But there came that uneasy feeling again. It was more like an ache this time. Perhaps it was the awkward hours of sleep throwing you off?

You sucked it up, shoved the feeling down. "Really, Spence, it depends on the woman. Do I know her? Maybe I can help- that is unless you want to profile her to get her interests? I can help with that too-"

"No, I-I don't want to profile her, I want to stay away from that, we do that on a near-daily basis."

"We?" You questioned. Reid froze, but kept walking, looking a little petrified. He put more frozen yogurt in his mouth, maybe to shut himself up. You grinned, "We as in you and her are both profilers or we as in you and I profile others together, so you don't want to profile her with me?"

"I don't want us... to profile her," he cleared his throat. "Yeah..."

You sighed with a breathy laugh, "Good, because I was starting to think you were after Emily."

He chuckled, "Oh, no, not Emily. She's too scary for me anyway. Uh..." He swallowed hard, the way he always did was he was anxious or nervous. I saw in his face he'd come to some sort of conclusion. "Don't... don't yell at me for this, alright?"

"Yell at you? Spence, I wouldn't..." You were confused. He set his frozen yogurt down on the bench he had stopped in front of and stood back in front of you, pushing his hair behind his ears. He looked at you with his doe eyes and the wind blew his curls back in front of his face, he looked to the ground. His forehead still creased between his brows, but his eyes were soft and sweet, his nose was slightly scrunched and his mouth was twisted to the side as if he was once again mentally calculating something. You granted him back the silence from earlier, wondering what was going on in that mind of his. That was... until his eyes met yours and he looked so desperately lost and longing and like he ached inside... and you no longer wondered.

You let out another long sigh. She was you.

This girl that he was trying to understand how to win over, she was you. He asked you because he needed to know what you wanted. He was nervous because he was practically confessing to you and you, a profiler, were too blind to see that.

He watched your face for your reaction, waiting for something good, but you were too shocked to react right. He unfroze, hands flying to the roots of his hair and he spun away from you. He started rambling, obviously thinking everything had gone wrong. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, (Y/N). That- that wasn't how I had things planned and I was so certain that maybe you-hm- liked me too."

His words made it true. This was, in fact, happening at 12:56am in the middle of a foreign city. Your words spilled out, stern, focused, serious. "Kiss me then."

He spun around again, "What?"

"Confess, then kiss, remember?" You recounted carefully, looking directly at him, stepping closer.

"But I didn't get to do my whole monologue thing-" He was grinning pretty hard now, all signs of stress removed from his face. He looked brighter than the neon froyo sign, in happiness and disbelief right down at you. You were pretty sure you looked similar as all the pieces fell in place in your mind. It all fit.

"I don't care." You beamed back. "Do it after."

So without wasting another second, he grabbed your face and kissed you. He kissed you with a year and four months' worth of frustration, lust, confusion and past jealousies. His hands holding your jaw, his fingertips in your hair and your hands on his chest, holding fast to jacket. The kiss was a little messy the first two seconds, but every second after it was enjoyable and sweet and oddly powerful. He also tasted rich, like chocolate mocha, but you knew where that came from.

He pulled away first, which surprised you, but he didn't move very far, in fact, he mumbled against your lips as he tucked your hair out of your face. "I think I've liked you since you and I first met. You didn't hate my science jokes and instead of being annoyed with my informational rants, you listened to me. I wasn't expecting you to be so involved with me since you're, well... you're you and you're loud and fun and sweet and beautiful, but we worked so well together how could I ignore what I felt?"

His hand was a little shaky still, but his fingertips on your cheek were gentle. He continued to quietly ramble, "I decided maybe I'd do something with myself that wasn't devoted to the BAU so I thought maybe I'd- I'd tell you this. That I think you're beautiful and smart and talented and maybe you'd understand and feel the same way and now that I know maybe you do, I feel oddly put back to how I'm supposed to be. And... I think I'm supposed to be with you. If this is too soon or... ruins our friendship, I'm sorry and I'll slow it down, but I won't stop liking you."

You couldn't believe that in a three-minute span you had gone from painfully oblivious to so extremely wide awake. But it was in the best way possible after a year and four months of you also being painfully crushed by your secret feelings for Dr.Reid.

"It's fine, Spence," you said quietly, smiling at him with the most happiness you had found in months. "More than fine, I can't believe this is real."

He tucked the other side of your hair behind your ear, "You might have DRC, then. It stands for dream-reality confusion and is a difficulty or inability to determine whether an event or experience occurred during the waking state or whether it was part of a dream. I can assure you that you aren't dreami-"

You reached up and pulled him onto your lips by the back of the neck, smiling into it. This would be the first time you've ever shut him up. He welcomed it by kissing you back again, softer this time. Now that he was sure you wouldn't hate him for it, it felt a lot more natural, a lot more at ease. His passion was still there, as was yours, but this was how things were supposed to be. There was no longer a rush.

The two of you started laughing after it all. Both of you laughed at how painfully oblivious you both were and he went on a small explanation as to why we don't see our own tells and how feelings of romantic relation cloud the judgement. You went over every time the rest of the team had made a comment you both secretly loved or some you dismissed because it was an ache to hear.

Spencer opened up about his fear of rejection and you did the same and that too resulted in more laughing because here you were, so afraid, but you had both been in it for so long. You deserved to have each other after all this time not only because you fit, but because everyone saw it too, far before either of you did.

An innocent, fun, midnight escapade to cheer Spencer up turned into him finding a truly happy state of mind. You took that as a win and success as you tossed frozen yogurt containers in the garbage and found your way back to your room where you told Spencer it was okay to sleep in the bed as long as he was nice.

So he let you turn out the lights and lay next to him, your head on his chest in the way you had done before when it was only an achingly platonic move. He played with your hair, stared at the green walls, ranted about the history of the colour green and soon after, the both of you went right back to sleep, entirely happy.

Tagged: @ellyhotchner @softhairedhotch

#spencer reid #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #criminalminds #emily prentiss #dr spencer reid #criminal minds fandom #spencer x y/n #cm #aaron hotchner #mutual pining #romance #spencer reid fandom

[fanficshiddles]

My Sweet Rose, Chapter 3 (Last Part)

It took Loki a few days before he was able to get a chance to speak to Rosie again. She kept running from him whenever she saw him, not giving him a chance at all.

In the end, he got fed up of her running from him. So he teleported into her room when he knew she was there, to sort it out.

She looked a bit fearful when he suddenly appeared in her room.

Loki put his hands out to the side. ‘Please, Rose… Rosie. I just want to talk, that’s all.’ He said softly.

Rosie slipped off her bed and moved to the side, a little further away from him.

‘I want, no, I need you to know that I never meant to hurt you. Truly. And you were not just a play toy, I give you my word. You meant, and still do mean, the world to me. It broke my heart every single day that I didn’t return to you.’ Loki said honestly.

Rosie wrapped her arms around herself, she couldn’t look at Loki properly. So kept her eyes on the floor on front of him while she listened.

‘I thought it would be for the best, not coming back to you.’

‘Why… Why didn’t you come back or tell me?’ Rosie asked, being brave and raising her eyes up to look into his for a moment, tears in her eyes again. But she was a little confused to see his eyes looked a little bit teary too.

Perhaps he really wasn’t lying.

‘I found out on that trip back to Asgard that I am… that I am a frost giant, a monster. I was told I was adopted, that I had no idea about previously. I suddenly felt myself spiralling out of control, there was no way I was going to put you in danger. I thought it was best, safest for you that I didn’t return… I see now that it was a mistake, that I should have spoken to you about the situation. Told you who I was. I thought I was doing the right thing by you, Rosie. I truly thought I was.’

Rosie wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

‘Why… Why should I believe you? I was… I was in love with you, I trusted you. And you broke that.’ Her lower lip was quivering as she spoke.

Loki nodded and looked down. ‘I am truly sorry. It is breaking me to see you so upset, knowing what I did to you. I never meant to…’ He turned to the door, to leave her alone. ‘I want you to know, there wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t think of you… Rose.’ He said softly before leaving.

Rosie felt her heart breaking all over again.

-

Later that day, Rosie bumped into Thor on her way to the lab.

‘Rosie… If I may have a word, I only need a minute of your time.’ He said politely.

She nodded and stopped in her tracks to see what he wanted to say. Thor could see how upset she was, it was evident on her face that she had barely slept since Loki appeared at the tower.

‘Loki spoke about you so fondly, he was madly in love with you… He still does love you. He never stopped. He really did think he was saving you, from himself. He went down a dark path, one that I didn’t think we could pull him from.’ Thor said regretfully.

Rosie shifted nervously on her feet.

‘He isn’t lying to you now, I promise you that. He is beating himself up about it, knowing what pain and harm he caused you for not just speaking to you. He thought it was best to stay away, but he realises now how wrong that was.’

She looked down with a sigh, she knew Thor wouldn’t lie. It wasn’t in his nature. But realising that Loki was telling the truth, she wasn’t really sure what to make of that information.

Thor let her carry on to the lab to do her work, she didn’t bump into Loki at all that day. Which she was rather glad of, because it gave her time to think.

The following day, she went to the kitchen in the morning to find Loki.

His face lit up a little when she approached him, actually seeking him out.

‘I… I believe you. I believe that you thought you were doing what you thought was best for me… Like you always did, you always looked out for me and did what was best. But you did get it wrong this time.’ She looked down and she nervously fiddled with her hands. ‘I don’t know if I will be able to forgive you for it, but I don’t… I don’t hate you. I never could. I understand why, though it doesn’t make it any less hurtful.’

Loki nodded and he wanted nothing more than to grab her hands in his, but he refrained from touching her. Knowing it probably wasn’t the best thing to do.

‘Thank you, Rose. That’s all I can ask for, I know. Though I do hope we can maybe be friends, in time? But I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here, it’s your home and work. I can leave, if that’s what you would prefer.’ Loki offered, surprising her slightly.

‘No… No, it’s ok… I did think I would need to leave, but I… I think it will be ok.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I’ll see you around… Loki.’ She gave him a very small smile, which made Loki smile a bit too.

It was a step in the right direction.

-

Over the following weeks, Rosie felt a bit better about everything. Herself included. Learning that a God had truly been in love with her was quite the confidence boost, even if it had gone wrong in the end. She understood now though.

She was still a bit nervous and anxious around him, but she wasn’t sure why really. Though their interactions were brief at first. Just hello’s or good morning’s. Then Loki started making her hot chocolate in the mornings, just the way she used to like it. With a marshmallow on top.

‘Thanks.’ She said shyly when he handed her a mug in the morning with a smile.

‘You’re welcome, darling.’ He smiled at her brightly.

He was glad to see she was looking better too, not tired or as scared of him. Though he could tell she was tired in another way, tired of being an adult and looking after herself. He had seen it before, when she was busy with work and hadn’t been able to go into little space for a while…

He wished he could allow her that relief, to go into little space with him. But he knew that would likely never happen again. Which broke his heart.

Over time, he couldn’t help himself from getting a bit protective over her. Old habits appearing.

She was cooking dinner one night, had offered to for everyone. She was using a sharp knife to cut up some vegetables when Loki walked in and saw her.

‘Let me do that for you.’ He said swiftly and rushed over to take the knife from her before she could argue. She tried to ignore the tingling she felt when his fingers had brushed against hers.

Another time, it was almost midnight and Loki had gone to get a snack from the kitchen when he spotted a light on in one of the offices. Popping his head round the door, he saw Rosie was still up doing some work.

He walked in and with a firm voice started telling her off. ‘You should be in bed, it’s way past your…’ He trailed off, eyes widening as he realised he had no right to be telling her what to do.  

She looked surprised and a little sheepish. Part of her wanted him to finish, to put her to bed. But she tried to push that feeling way down.

‘Sorry…’ Loki shook his head and rushed out of the room quickly.

-

One afternoon, there was a mad rush in the tower when Bruce had turned into the Hulk by accident, causing destruction and chaos as everyone ran around screaming trying to get out of the way, while Natasha tried to calm him down.

Rosie had gotten caught up with some SHIELD officers charging past her, knocking her to the floor.

‘ROSE!’ Loki shouted and rushed over to her, he had been looking for her during the panic to make sure she was safe. Seeing her being knocked to the floor panicked him.

‘I’m ok.’ She said as she sat up. But before she could get herself up, Loki had already put his arms around her and lifted her up to her feet.

‘You’re bleeding.’ He commented as he picked up her hand, she had a cut on the side of her wrist.

‘It’s just a scratch, it’s ok.’ She said quietly.

Loki put his arm around her waist and led her into the nearest room, away from the hustle and bustle. He sat her down on a chair and knelt on front of her, inspecting her wrist.

‘Honestly, it’s fine. Just a scratch.’ She said again, trying to pull her hand away, but Loki wouldn’t let her.

He conjured up a plaster and some soothing cream. Her heart started beating a little faster when he applied the cream gently and then put the plaster on.

‘Any other injuries? Are you sore anywhere else, that was quite a fall?’ He asked, concern etched all over his face as he inspected her arms and hands closely, then looked into her eyes.

‘I’m… I’m fine… Thank you… Loki.’ She stammered out, her skittish eyes never quite landing on his.

Once he was sure she was ok, he let her go and walked her back to her room safely. She was shaking when she got inside, not because of Hulk or being knocked over, but because of how close she felt to falling into little space with Loki.

There was the deep longing within her, just wanting him to look after her again, like he used to. His natural Daddy instincts was bursting out, though she could tell he was trying to contain it.

Though she was terrified of being left again

-

That night, Loki was sitting up in bed reading. It was getting late, but he just couldn’t sleep. He was really antsy because there was thunder and lightning outside, he knew how scared Rosie was of thunderstorms. And this was a particularly bad one.

He wanted nothing more than to go to her room and comfort her, or just make sure she was ok. But he knew he had no right to do that anymore.

Though he was confused when there was a timid knock on his door.

Slipping out of bed, he had some leather trousers materialise onto him as he crossed the room, so he wasn’t answering naked. When he opened the door, his heart utterly collapsed at the sight.

It was Rosie. Rose. His sweet Rose. She was wearing cute kitten pyjamas that he had gifted her before, and she was clutching a stuffed toy dog to her chest tightly. She looked scared, and he knew instantly that she was in little space. Her eyes were watery, she had been crying.

‘I… I’m… scared…’ She said shakily.

Loki had barely opened his arms to her when she rushed forward into him. He put his arms around her and held her tightly to his body, then he lifted her up and squeezed her even harder as he pressed his face into her hair, breathing in deeply.

She wrapped her legs around him and hid her face into the crook of his neck. She was trembling a bit, but it was slowly easing as he carried her over to his bed.

‘It’s ok, my little one. You’re safe with me, I promise.’ He said softly and got into bed, curling her up on his lap safely.

She kept hugging into him, jumping whenever there was a rumble of thunder.

‘Shhh, shhh. It’s ok, my sweet Rose.’ He hummed gently and slid his hand under her top to stroke her back soothingly, making her melt and feel safe.

‘You’re safe with Daddy. And I promise, I am never going to let you down again.’

#Loki #Tom Hiddleston #Loki x OFC #Loki x original female character #loki fic #fan fiction #my sweet rose

[imagine-loki]

My Sweet Rose, Chapter 3 (Final Chapter)

TITLE: My Sweet Rose CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 3 AUTHOR: fanficshiddles ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine you are secretly a little but no one knows, one day you decide to check out a local BDSM club to try and get a feel of the community. You meet a handsome stranger that, over the next few months, shows you all about the lifestyle. However, one day… he vanishes without a word. 

RATING: M

It took Loki a few days before he was able to get a chance to speak to Rosie again. She kept running from him whenever she saw him, not giving him a chance at all.

In the end, he got fed up of her running from him. So he teleported into her room when he knew she was there, to sort it out.

She looked a bit fearful when he suddenly appeared in her room.

Loki put his hands out to the side. ‘Please, Rose… Rosie. I just want to talk, that’s all.’ He said softly.

Rosie slipped off her bed and moved to the side, a little further away from him.

‘I want, no, I need you to know that I never meant to hurt you. Truly. And you were not just a play toy, I give you my word. You meant, and still do mean, the world to me. It broke my heart every single day that I didn’t return to you.’ Loki said honestly.

Rosie wrapped her arms around herself, she couldn’t look at Loki properly. So kept her eyes on the floor on front of him while she listened.

‘I thought it would be for the best, not coming back to you.’

‘Why… Why didn’t you come back or tell me?’ Rosie asked, being brave and raising her eyes up to look into his for a moment, tears in her eyes again. But she was a little confused to see his eyes looked a little bit teary too.

Perhaps he really wasn’t lying.

‘I found out on that trip back to Asgard that I am… that I am a frost giant, a monster. I was told I was adopted, that I had no idea about previously. I suddenly felt myself spiralling out of control, there was no way I was going to put you in danger. I thought it was best, safest for you that I didn’t return… I see now that it was a mistake, that I should have spoken to you about the situation. Told you who I was. I thought I was doing the right thing by you, Rosie. I truly thought I was.’

Rosie wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

‘Why… Why should I believe you? I was… I was in love with you, I trusted you. And you broke that.’ Her lower lip was quivering as she spoke.

Loki nodded and looked down. ‘I am truly sorry. It is breaking me to see you so upset, knowing what I did to you. I never meant to…’ He turned to the door, to leave her alone. ‘I want you to know, there wasn’t a day that went by where I didn’t think of you… Rose.’ He said softly before leaving.

Rosie felt her heart breaking all over again.

-

Later that day, Rosie bumped into Thor on her way to the lab.

‘Rosie… If I may have a word, I only need a minute of your time.’ He said politely.

She nodded and stopped in her tracks to see what he wanted to say. Thor could see how upset she was, it was evident on her face that she had barely slept since Loki appeared at the tower.

‘Loki spoke about you so fondly, he was madly in love with you… He still does love you. He never stopped. He really did think he was saving you, from himself. He went down a dark path, one that I didn’t think we could pull him from.’ Thor said regretfully.

Rosie shifted nervously on her feet.

‘He isn’t lying to you now, I promise you that. He is beating himself up about it, knowing what pain and harm he caused you for not just speaking to you. He thought it was best to stay away, but he realises now how wrong that was.’

She looked down with a sigh, she knew Thor wouldn’t lie. It wasn’t in his nature. But realising that Loki was telling the truth, she wasn’t really sure what to make of that information.

Thor let her carry on to the lab to do her work, she didn’t bump into Loki at all that day. Which she was rather glad of, because it gave her time to think.

The following day, she went to the kitchen in the morning to find Loki.

His face lit up a little when she approached him, actually seeking him out.

‘I… I believe you. I believe that you thought you were doing what you thought was best for me… Like you always did, you always looked out for me and did what was best. But you did get it wrong this time.’ She looked down and she nervously fiddled with her hands. ‘I don’t know if I will be able to forgive you for it, but I don’t… I don’t hate you. I never could. I understand why, though it doesn’t make it any less hurtful.’

Loki nodded and he wanted nothing more than to grab her hands in his, but he refrained from touching her. Knowing it probably wasn’t the best thing to do.

‘Thank you, Rose. That’s all I can ask for, I know. Though I do hope we can maybe be friends, in time? But I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here, it’s your home and work. I can leave, if that’s what you would prefer.’ Loki offered, surprising her slightly.

‘No… No, it’s ok… I did think I would need to leave, but I… I think it will be ok.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I’ll see you around… Loki.’ She gave him a very small smile, which made Loki smile a bit too.

It was a step in the right direction.

-

Over the following weeks, Rosie felt a bit better about everything. Herself included. Learning that a God had truly been in love with her was quite the confidence boost, even if it had gone wrong in the end. She understood now though.

She was still a bit nervous and anxious around him, but she wasn’t sure why really. Though their interactions were brief at first. Just hello’s or good morning’s. Then Loki started making her hot chocolate in the mornings, just the way she used to like it. With a marshmallow on top.

‘Thanks.’ She said shyly when he handed her a mug in the morning with a smile.

‘You’re welcome, darling.’ He smiled at her brightly.

He was glad to see she was looking better too, not tired or as scared of him. Though he could tell she was tired in another way, tired of being an adult and looking after herself. He had seen it before, when she was busy with work and hadn’t been able to go into little space for a while…

He wished he could allow her that relief, to go into little space with him. But he knew that would likely never happen again. Which broke his heart.

Over time, he couldn’t help himself from getting a bit protective over her. Old habits appearing.

She was cooking dinner one night, had offered to for everyone. She was using a sharp knife to cut up some vegetables when Loki walked in and saw her.

‘Let me do that for you.’ He said swiftly and rushed over to take the knife from her before she could argue. She tried to ignore the tingling she felt when his fingers had brushed against hers.

Another time, it was almost midnight and Loki had gone to get a snack from the kitchen when he spotted a light on in one of the offices. Popping his head round the door, he saw Rosie was still up doing some work.

He walked in and with a firm voice started telling her off. ‘You should be in bed, it’s way past your…’ He trailed off, eyes widening as he realised he had no right to be telling her what to do.  

She looked surprised and a little sheepish. Part of her wanted him to finish, to put her to bed. But she tried to push that feeling way down.

‘Sorry…’ Loki shook his head and rushed out of the room quickly.

-

One afternoon, there was a mad rush in the tower when Bruce had turned into the Hulk by accident, causing destruction and chaos as everyone ran around screaming trying to get out of the way, while Natasha tried to calm him down.

Rosie had gotten caught up with some SHIELD officers charging past her, knocking her to the floor.

‘ROSE!’ Loki shouted and rushed over to her, he had been looking for her during the panic to make sure she was safe. Seeing her being knocked to the floor panicked him.

‘I’m ok.’ She said as she sat up. But before she could get herself up, Loki had already put his arms around her and lifted her up to her feet.

‘You’re bleeding.’ He commented as he picked up her hand, she had a cut on the side of her wrist.

‘It’s just a scratch, it’s ok.’ She said quietly.

Loki put his arm around her waist and led her into the nearest room, away from the hustle and bustle. He sat her down on a chair and knelt on front of her, inspecting her wrist.

‘Honestly, it’s fine. Just a scratch.’ She said again, trying to pull her hand away, but Loki wouldn’t let her.

He conjured up a plaster and some soothing cream. Her heart started beating a little faster when he applied the cream gently and then put the plaster on.

‘Any other injuries? Are you sore anywhere else, that was quite a fall?’ He asked, concern etched all over his face as he inspected her arms and hands closely, then looked into her eyes.

‘I’m… I’m fine… Thank you… Loki.’ She stammered out, her skittish eyes never quite landing on his.

Once he was sure she was ok, he let her go and walked her back to her room safely. She was shaking when she got inside, not because of Hulk or being knocked over, but because of how close she felt to falling into little space with Loki.

There was the deep longing within her, just wanting him to look after her again, like he used to. His natural Daddy instincts was bursting out, though she could tell he was trying to contain it.

Though she was terrified of being left again.

-

That night, Loki was sitting up in bed reading. It was getting late, but he just couldn’t sleep. He was really antsy because there was thunder and lightning outside, he knew how scared Rosie was of thunderstorms. And this was a particularly bad one.

He wanted nothing more than to go to her room and comfort her, or just make sure she was ok. But he knew he had no right to do that anymore.

Though he was confused when there was a timid knock on his door.

Slipping out of bed, he had some leather trousers materialise onto him as he crossed the room, so he wasn’t answering naked. When he opened the door, his heart utterly collapsed at the sight.

It was Rosie. Rose. His sweet Rose. She was wearing cute kitten pyjamas that he had gifted her before, and she was clutching a stuffed toy dog to her chest tightly. She looked scared, and he knew instantly that she was in little space. Her eyes were watery, she had been crying.

‘I… I’m… scared…’ She said shakily.

Loki had barely opened his arms to her when she rushed forward into him. He put his arms around her and held her tightly to his body, then he lifted her up and squeezed her even harder as he pressed his face into her hair, breathing in deeply.

She wrapped her legs around him and hid her face into the crook of his neck. She was trembling a bit, but it was slowly easing as he carried her over to his bed.

‘It’s ok, my little one. You’re safe with me, I promise.’ He said softly and got into bed, curling her up on his lap safely.

She kept hugging into him, jumping whenever there was a rumble of thunder.

‘Shhh, shhh. It’s ok, my sweet Rose.’ He hummed gently and slid his hand under her top to stroke her back soothingly, making her melt and feel safe.

‘You’re safe with Daddy. And I promise, I am never going to let you down again.’

#Loki #Angst #Submitted fic #submission #chapter 3 #fanficshiddles #my sweet rose

[babymetaldoll]

The morning after (Spilling drinks on my settee part 2) Spencer Reid/Reader

Requested: Yes! it’s my first request! thank you, anon!! 

Prompt: Hungover Spencer has to face Reader after she caught him drunk, puking outside her house. He also has to face Morgan’s teasing after he confessed he was in love with Reader.

Pairing: Spencer/Reader 

Warnings: none 

Category: Fluff

Word count: 1,9K 

Part one here

Masterlist 

.

If it had been up to Spencer, he would have never left his bed that day. As soon as he opened his eyes, the headache that hit him made him realize that was going to be a long day. A long and shitty day. 

He sat on his bed slowly ‘cos the whole room was spinning. He was still fully dressed, why? There was puke on his shoes and pants… and a Gatorade on his nightstand? He was confused, he didn’t leave that there, right? no… maybe? he didn’t really remember. Why was he still dressed? he didn’t remember. How did he get home? he didn’t remember

- “Shit!”

Until he did. 

There was a flash of embarrassment, guilt, and nausea on his face, suddenly it was all coming back. 

- “Shit!”

That was the only word Spencer could use. He had gotten drunk, confessed to Morgan he was in love with (Y/N), he had actually tried to…

- “Shit!”

Maybe alcohol had managed to unplug a part of Reid’s brain, ‘cos apparently, “shit” was the only thing he was able to pronounce, at least for a few minutes.  

All the embarrassing memories of the night before kept coming back to his mind, they were fragments of someone else’s life he was watching from outside. It was all too humiliating. (Y/N) saw him puking outside her house. He was outside her house ‘cos he wanted to know why she had been out on a date with a guy from a dating website. He had told Morgan he loved her, and nearly cried. 

Spencer Walter Reid was doomed, and he knew it. It was going to take a lot of courage, patience, and Gatorade to go through that day. 

His cellphone kept buzzing, but once he realized it wasn’t a case, but (Y/N) and Morgan trying to reach him, he ignored it the whole subway ride to work. He couldn’t even read, his brain wasn’t working, he couldn’t concentrate at all. He just wanted to disappear forever. What had he done? how could he ever face (Y/N) after what happened? And what if Morgan had already told everyone what happened? of course he had, Reid thought, and his red cheeks were now purple. 

Humiliation was written across his face and his stomach tightened as he set foot into the bullpen. He took a quick look around and sighed relieved. Apparently, there was no one else there yet, the whole place seemed empty, although there was a fresh cup of coffee with extra sugar on his desk, a grilled cheese sandwich, and a chocolate frosted donut with sprinkles. 

That could only mean one thing. 

- “Hey, how are you feeling this morning?”- Spencer froze in panic and turned around very, very slowly. His heart was beating so fast, he was sure (Y/N) could listen to it. She was waving at him with a shy smile on her face. She didn’t look mad, or uncomfortable. She looked… worried. 

- “H… he… hey, (Y/N)-” he stuttered and waved. He knew he had to say something- anything- but nothing seemed to come to mind. He was literally speechless. 

- “How are you feeling?”

- “G… g… good, I’m good, I’m ok”- Spencer wanted to slap himself. He was humiliated already, but his behavior wasn’t making it any better. He had to put his shit together somehow.

- “I’m glad”- she sighed relieved, rubbing his arm sweetly, and her touch made him shiver right away. He tried to smile at her, but he was left speechless again. It was a painful scene to see. 

- “I was worried sick, you didn’t pick up your phone earlier”- Reid just nodded and looked down.

- “I got you the best recipe to cure your hangover, coffee of course, and I filled half the cup with sugar, just the way you like it”- the way (Y/N) stuck out her tongue and giggled, hypnotized him.

- “I made you a grilled cheese sandwich, I don't know how many times you've woken up feeling like shit after a party, but I'm pretty sure I’ve got a lot more experience than you, and greasy food always helps me coming back to life.”

Spencer nodded, trying to follow the conversation, but his brain was still malfunctioning and his head was pounding sharp and heavy. 

- “And your favorite donut 'cos you need extra sugar”

- “Thanks”- his voice was a sweet whisper. (Y/N) looked at him worried and rubbed a hand on his arm gently again.

- “Are you gonna tell me what the fuck happened last night?”- the painful grimace on Spencer's face was enough.

- “I'm just worried something bad happened to you “

- “No, no, no”- he shook his head frenetically and regretted the movement immediately. His head was killing him- “I just couldn't handle my drinks, that's all.”

- “Are you sure?”- lying to profilers could be the hardest thing on earth.

- “Yeah, yeah”

- “Good, I was worried you were going to call in sick…”- there was a short silence between them, they just stared at each other and sighed. 

(Y/N) couldn’t stop thinking he had called her “Buttercup” and didn’t know how to ask him to do it again, and again, every day. And Reid had no idea what to do next. So he just said the first thing that came to mind.  

- “Did you know hangovers are estimated to cost $148 billion each year due to hangover individuals calling in sick to work or performing poorly on the job.”  

- “Pretty boy!!”

Derek’s voice walking over them made Spencer’s heart stop in fear, he just waved at his friend with his less expressive smile - the one (Y/N) called “frog face”- and just prayed to whatever god that might exist, that Morgan wouldn’t embarrass him more than he was already. 

- “How are you feeling today, kid?”

- “I’m ok, thanks” 

- “You are lucky there’s no case, yet”- Dr. Reid nodded and looked around, trying to find a way to run away from Morgan and (Y/N). 

- “Nice breakfast”

- “I thought he was going to need extra energy today”- the young woman smiled proudly- “And when are you going to explain to me what happened last night? why did you let him get that drunk?”

Morgan knew (Y/N) was going to be mad at him, so he just looked at Spencer and waited to see if he had made up any lie already 

- “I… I told you, I just couldn’t keep up with Derek”

- “Yeah”- his friend immediately supported his lie. Which wasn’t a complete lie- “I pushed Reid to drink at my pace, and I guess pretty boy ain’t ready to drink like a man.”

On a regular day, Spencer would have hated that last comment, ‘cos he was sick and tired of his friend treating him like a toddler. But under those circumstances, he just nodded and tried to stay calm. 

- “And why were you outside my house?” 

- “We were looking for a cab, started walking… and Reid remembered you live close to the bar”- Spencer’s eyes opened wide at those words- “And he wanted to stop by.”

- “No I didn’t”- Reid knew he would lose in a fight with Derek, but he was willing to give it a try and punch him if that successfully stopped him from talking.  

- “Kid, you were drunk, you don’t remember, but you wanted to stop by and see (Y/N)”- the girl looked at Reid and bit her lips

- “Is that so? you got drunk and started thinking of me?”

Spencer couldn’t speak. He felt his hands shaking, so he hid them in his pockets and tried to come up with anything, literally anything to say. But he had nothing.  

- “Yes, pretty boy wanted to see you…”- Morgan just smiled, tapped on Spencer’s back, and walked away chuckling. He knew Reid needed a push to open up to (Y/N). Maybe this was what he needed. 

- “Why did you think of me?”- (Y/N) was now intrigued and excited. Drunk Reid was a whole new side of her friend, and the fact he had dragged Derek to her house when he was intoxicated gave her a little hope. Maybe he liked her too, the way she was head over feet for him.

- “I…”- Spencer was chocking with words, he turned around, grabbed the coffee, and took a sip of it. 

- “You?”

- “I don’t remember”- disappointment was written all over (Y/N)’s face. They just stared. Spencer drank his coffee and the girl simply sighed. 

- “I see”- he could read there was something there, but he didn’t want to get his hopes high. He was sure (Y/N) could never feel the same way he did. Right?

- “Can I ask you something?”- he whispered- “Why didn’t you tell me about the dating website?”

Now (Y/N) was embarrassed. She couldn’t take her eyes from her friend’s as she kept thinking about what to say. How to lie? 

- “It wasn’t important, Prentiss forced me, I didn’t want to do it”- she simply confessed and smiled- “Why?” 

- “I don’t know, it was weird, I thought… well…”

- “You know I tell you everything important”- (Y/N) wanted to make sure Spencer understood that the date had meant nothing. 

- “And… are you planning to do it again?”

- “Never”- the smile on her lips was so honest, Spencer’s heart was relieved- “So, tomorrow’s Saturday, got any plan?”- those words, they were music for his ears. 

- “Actually, there is a Russian horror movie festival tomorrow night, they’ll be showing Solaris, Viy, and Lyumi”

- “Original Russian, I presume”

- “But this time I’m pretty sure there will be subtitles”- (Y/N) pouted disappointed.

- “Bummer, I like when you have to translate the whole movie for me”- and she meant it, having Reid whispering every word in her ear for two hours was the closest she had been to heaven in her entire life. The young doctor chuckled with a huge grin and turned to his desk again. 

- “Usually, translation doesn’t represent the intention behind the dialog…”- Reid was full of it and he knew it, but he had nothing to lose and lot to win- “So if you want, I can still whisper the English version for you”.

Those last words left his lips as quickly as possible, ‘cos he was embarrassed. 

- “Then it’s a date”- her smile was bigger than imagined when she turned around and started walking to her desk. 

Was it a date? why did she say that? Reid tried to stay cool and not overthink everything, but it was Reid, which meant it was hard, nearly impossible. Overthinking was his thing. 

He wanted to go out on a date with (Y/N), but… was that actually a date? what if he brought flowers for her and she didn’t mean “date” as a date but just as two friends going out together? that would be mortifying. 

(Y/N) didn’t know if Spencer had thought she wanted it to be a real date. She did, she just didn’t know if she was asking or if he had or… 

Yes, they were both excellent overthinkers. 

- “Hey, honey”- if she was already embarrassed and anxious about using the word “date”, she could always make it worst.

Spencer turned to look at her he took a bite of his sandwich. 

- “It was really sweet last night when you called me Buttercup”- Reid nearly choked. He had completely forgotten about it, and suddenly he felt the urge to run and hide. But he couldn’t even move. He couldn’t even swallow the food he was chewing 

- “You had never called me by a nickname before…”- she bit her lips and took a deep breath- “I loved it… in case you want to use it again.”

Spencer nodded and watched his best friend walk away to get herself a coffee. He could feel someone else’s eyes on him from across the office. Morgan winked at him and nodded. 

- “Nice, kid”

.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #matthew gray gubler #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #fluff #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #dr. spencer reid #requested #fanfiction #babymetaldoll writes

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

47. Stupid Teenage crush

Prompt used- Touching their elbow to get their attention | ANGST | HURT COMFORT | IRL- based

To be 17 and to be in love, harry was no exception.

Harry saw it in his eyes, he really did.. but was he wrong. Was he so absolutely wrong...

They met in July again after years, last year. It wasn't such a special meet or something he could tell his kids about, it was just a simple meet with only a question being asked while they were doing potions homework. Harry was sat in the library doing his homework when he got stuck and desperately needed help and there he was, sitting in his black suit on the end of the table, scratching down his own work. Harry had asked for help in his notes, and without hesitation draco gave him his notebook and asked harry to return it to him whenever he wanted, as Long as it was before potions class. Harry had never thought of Draco differently until that moment he decided to help. Like a gentlemen, harry hurried the work and decided to hand draco his notebook before next potions lesson and so he did, that's when they hit it off when Draco tried to make a small conversation and it resulted into a long conversation on parchment in the classroom barely paying attention to the class.

From little conversations they went to long conversations to dropping draco off at the end of the day to his dorms and only then harry would walk away, smiling to himself. He didn't admit it to himself that he was slowly falling for draco until that very night harry was sitting on the floor talking with Ron and Hermione. It was like a random switch when Ron and Hermione shared a sweet simple kiss that it occurred to harry, he'd like to do it too, only the one he wanted to do it with was draco. It was journey from then, harry would wait to meet draco before class, would desperately make arrangements so he sat next to draco without dropping hints, walk back with him showing affection in his ways is teasing only because they were alone, hit him playfully, go to hogsmeade with him, eat with him, talk with him for Long hours after quidditch practices . Everything was brilliantly perfect for harry.

Draco looked at him the way only someone who liked you did, he locked eyes with across the room like no one else did, made him walk entire grounds off just so he didn't had to walk off to the dorms early and to spend more time with harry, draco never talked with anyone the way he did with harry, never was playful but with harry, he gave harry the smile only preserved for him. Everything between them was simply their own little secret and Harry felt wrecked. He felt warmth spread inside him everytime he saw draco. He felt, loved, happy when he was with him, something he thought he'd lost feeling of after the war but draco became something to quickly to Harry that he couldn't help anything but admire draco, even if he tried so hard not to. Harry spent his days daydreaming about being with draco, somewhere knowing that maybe draco too liked him.

He was relentlessly falling without caution until it was too late and harry experienced his first little heartbreak when he noticed the slight ways draco would flirt with Astoria. It only happened every once in a while, so harry didn't expect a lot but when one day because of being sick harry took a day off, he was next day met with draco's stories of walking back with Astoria, going to hogsmeade and eating with her. It bubbled little jealousy inside of him but harry had no right to be jealous, why did he ? He didn't love draco, did he? It was stupid crush, right ? A crush everyone have when they're 17, that'll die out soon ?

Harry should have been happy for him when he first heard draco admit he liked Astoria, he should've been happy for him and all he did gave him smile but he didn't walk back with him. He couldn't, he was too busy pushing his heart into the cage of no feelings for him but heart had to be one bratty little thing to fight back equally hard and harry remained all but cautiously falling, again I'm failed attempts to not fall.

Then the news came, Astoria dating Blaise, who had left school by now to associate his mother in business. Harry became relieved, only he was little more cautious to not let his heart be played but a man is only but a fool with none soldier to protect his heart when the blow hits. When they expanded their little circle, theo coming into their little circle, harry loved him too. He never had a friend like theo who hated the same things as his own, loved the same things as his own. It was easy to just blend into with theo but harry should've known better about the little hidden plans, the classes they took together that harry didn't with them. But theo knew, theo saw right through harry and remained committed to not only have harry have the opportunity when it came but also talk with harry about his little day dreams. But theo came with Astoria and when Astoria happened, harry said only but " I'm over draco, I don't like him" and that must've been his biggest mistake, Lying to himself and theo.

Days turned to weeks, into a month of final examinations, graduation coming nearer. Harry hadn't met draco or theo apart from little crossings in the library. But heart broken once should have known,

" hey, harry, can I ask you something ?" Theo asked as he pulled towards the corner one day In the library

" sure, go ahead " harry grinned as he shrugged

" I was hoping you won't get mad or anything because I know it would be wrong on my part, but just so you know, I am still your friend and if it makes you uncomfortable we won't do anything" theo babbled

" what's the matter theo ?" Harry frowned, worried for theo.

" d- harry- draco asked me out on a date after exams " theo swallowed.

Harry's face relaxed as he felt himself falling backward, only he wasn't. His heart sinked, his stomach felt funny and his toes curled. Harry gulped as he realised theo was waiting for some response.

" and I'm fine with it theo. It's really considerate of you to ask me but I've told you before theo, I'm over draco. He's a gone crush. I never even liked him that much you know. I stopped liking him after Astoria. I mean, really " harry chuckled softly as he smoothly lied .

Theo sighed in relief " thank god because I like him too but I just didn't want to hurt you because you know, you liked him. You're sure though, right ?"

" of course theo, of course " harry patted his shoulder " listen I gotta go, Hermione would kill me if I didn't study. See you around and definitely tell me about that date later, yeah " and harry rapidly walked off waving a goodbye with a smile until he turned around and his heart fell out of his chest. Harry thought and thought, thought hard as why couldn't he just simply get over draco. He hadn't seen him a month, Barely talked with him, he should not have felt saddened by the little revelation, he should've been happy for draco, he should have been. But he wasn't, he couldn't even after he so desperately tried.

It wasn't until the graduation day that harry saw draco finally. He was dressed in his characteristic dark green robes with a Slytherin bachelor hat, his degrees in his hands. Smiling he approached draco, almost touching his elbow to get his attention when he finally saw who was coming towards him and harry all but felt sickened again.

In his moments of weakness, harry never even realised when had he actually grabbed draco's elbow until Draco turned around with a sharp distracted smile

" harry " draco exclaimed happily

" h- hi , happy graduation " harry swallowed, fighting his breaking heart into pulling a smile.

" happy graduation to you too. You did great by the way. I'm so proud of you " draco grinned as he patted Harry's shoulder. Harry looked at his hand over his shoulder, wanting to touch it just so he could hold his hand but he didn't..

He wasn't Harry's.

Proudly harry pulled a better smile and savagely replied " bet you thought you'd be better than me "

Draco chuckled " never harry, you're Always the best "

And yet you're with him, not me.

Harry crackled a smile as theo too joined in and best pretended not to be completely heart broken by seeing the two being together.

That day harry understood if he ever understood anything, all wounds may heal but some wounds leaves scar and if too, somedays they may even sting but you gotta live through pain, because perhaps that was love.

I really want to write a part 2 to this. This one really had me thinking until the right inspiration hit, and here's something based of real life. Happy reading..

Requests open

Day 46- old habits | Day 48- because, it's you and me

#drarry #harry potter #draco x harry #harry james potter #hp fandom #drarry prompt #harry potter fanfiction #draco is gay #draco malfoy #drarry headcanon #drarry drabbles #drarry drabble challenge #drarry ao3 #drarry angst #drarry au #drarry fic rec #drarry ficlet #drarry fandom #drarry stuff #drarry ship #drarry squad #harry potter oneshot #draco malfoy one shot #harry potter fic

[thewistlingbadger]

One day I will rewrite cm but for today here's what I got:

For the rest of season 7 (10 episodes) and maybe the first bit of season 8 Spencer stays mad a JJ and Emily. It is not easily resolved because it shouldn't be easily resolved. Emily knows what she did was wrong and that she needs to apologize but it takes her a few weeks because she's thinking about everything that she should say bc if she doesn't do it right spencer is gonna be at her throat. when shes prepared, she goes to spencer's apartment after a case, maybe on an evening they have off. when he doesn't answer the door, she sits on the other side and starts apologizing. spencer expresses his emotions towards her and admits to her that he almost went back on Dilaudid. they're both crying through out the whole way too. the camera is getting close ups of emily wiping her tears while apolgizing its getting close ups of spencers crying while shes apolgizing there even a shot of the both of them sitting back to back, through the wall (if you've seen the movie frozen you would know what i mean). eventually, spencer opens the door they hug while crying, and the next day they go back to work and start rebuilding their relationship. It would take him longer to forgive JJ tho. (respectfully so)

It would maybe go a lil something like this

Emily should have expected that Spencer wouldn't come around easily. She had faked her death without telling him, was gone for a year, and then came back like it was nothing. She had missed her family so much, she couldn't wait to spend time with Spencer again but he wasn't having any of it. She knew that she had to carefully plan out what she was going to say to him. You can't try to get out of it or shift the blame. You have to be intelligent and sincere, if not he's going to grill you to hell and back. She told herself. So after 2 weeks of preparing the right things to say, she went to his apartment. "Spencer!" She knocked. No answer. She knew he was in there though, Hotch had sent them home not even 2 hours ago. She saw his shadow from under the door, but he did not answer. Fuck me why did I have to fuck this up. With a sigh, she sat on the other side of the door. "Look I-" she took a breath. She had to do this, she reminded herself. Not only because they work together but because he deserves an apology. He deserves to know how much she regrets it. "I know you're... upset at me. And I deserve it. Really, I do." She listened for him. All she heard was some muffled movements. "What I did was, what's the best word here, fucked up? It was wrong. It was...selfish to think I could just run away in order to protect you guys. I can't imagine the pain you all have gone through." Still no sign of Spencer. The thought that she's ruined their relationship forever and he'll never forgive her crosses her mind, she shudders in fear. "I'm not asking for forgiveness. Nothing I can do would make up for my actions. I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I left you, and everyone else on the team. There wasn't a day that I didn't think about you or how much I wished I could have been on the jet with you while we play chess or you infodump on me." She looked up at the light on the ceiling, trying not to cry. "I know that sometimes people grow apart but Spencer, I really don't want that to be us." She shook her head and looked down. She was wiping a tear away when she heard a sniffle from the other side of the door. "God Emily, You have no idea what happened." He let out a sob. "You were the only person I ever confided in and understood. And then you just left? You left me and and- you left the rest of the team! Penelope was crying every second she thought no one was looking! Derek wouldn't let himself rest!" Emily let the shame and guilt rise in her. "I was at JJ's house constantly! Crying on her couch almost every night, mourning the loss of you when you weren't even dead! And JJ knew that too! She saw me suffer for 10 weeks and didn't say a word. That should have never happened. No where on the job application does it say that sometimes, you'll have to fake your death 'for the greater good'. You shouldn't have even asked her to do that for you! None of us would have ever crossed that line Emily, but you did. We all know that was the most stupidest decision anyone has ever made while on the job." She took every word he said to heart. He's right. Maybe there was a way to be safe and still be alive. If anyone could have found that out, it would have been Spencer. He must have heard her crying from the other side of the door. Which lead her to believe that he must have been sitting right by the door on the other side. There's no other he could have heard her soft sobs. She was trying to be as quiet as she could. She deserved his full blown rant. Every last word she wanted to hear. She knew that she had no one to blame but herself for the amount of disappointment that was in his voice. "You think I want to be mad at you? Emily, you're my friend. You're one the closet friends I've ever had. I've trusted you with my life multiple times and I'd do it again. But I don't know how to forgive or forget that fact that you didn't trust me with your life." He cried, "I don't want to be mad at you. It's exhausting. It's exhausting trying to avoid you while I get my coffee and everyone always popping by to try to convince me

to make peace with you. It's exhausting pretending that I hate you. Because I don't. As I much as I've tried I can't bring myself to do it. But at the same time how can I let go what you did to me?" "I thought about going back on Dilaudid Mil." He let the gravity of what he said fill the air. "I though about it almost every day. I couldn't take it anymore." "Spencer please-" He opened the door. The super short haircut that he had when she left had grown into a little fringe that rested on his forehead. His eyebags still looked the same. But it had been forever since she had seen him comfortable. It brought the tears to her eyes that she didn't think she had. He pulled her off the ground and into an embrace. She let out a deep exhale, "You don't know how long I've wanted to do this." "Actually I think I do." They both laughed. He invited her inside to have tea so they could recover from their sob session. When they went back into work the next day, It wasn't like how it was before, but they were in a better place than they were yesterday. By: Mic

#mic writes fanfiction #spencer reid #cm #criminal minds #emily prentiss #rewriting criminal minds #fix it fic #headcanon #spemily #spencer reid and emily prentiss #spencer and emily

[mono-dot-jpeg]

having a sweet but hot-tempted s/o - k. akabane, n. shiota, c. ryuunosuke, i. yuuma

a/n: im rewatching the series and god i love them ✨✨ i need to make content of them NOW-

karma akabane

Now you were usually a very sweet and nice person but when Karma found out about your hot tempered side, he liked to bring that side of you out a lot. The class was usually worried that you would really snap at him one day but you never did. Sure, you got mad at him but you never got too into your anger.

But he won't deny, he liked your sweet side. I mean who wouldn't? You were really nice to everyone but you stood up for yourself when you needed to and you had a fire in your eyes. He liked that.

He loved you a lot, he would admit that gladly. He liked seeing you mad everytime he teased you. It was pretty cute to him.

"Oh, y/n!" He sung teasingly as he sat on the couch lazily. "Come out, we made a deal!" You can practically see devil horns grow on his head.

"I hate you for this, Karma!" You huffed as you walked out of your room. "Why do you even have this?!" It was a maid uniform.

"Why not? Got it just for you, babe!" He stuck his tongue out, winking at you. "You look pretty cute! I wonder what the class would think about this." You can see him pull out his phone to take a picture of you.

You quickly climb onto him to grab his phone but it's just out of your reach. "Karma! Don't you dare!" You kept trying to grab the phone but no success. You hadn't realized but you were right where he wanted you. His free arm wraps around your waist pulling you close to him. "Karma! What are you doing?!"

"Having fun in teasing you, of course." He chuckled. "I'm kidding. Just wanted a cuddle." He said with a false innocence to it.

“Yeah right! You’re just enjoying every second of this bet!” You yelled at him, hitting him though it didn’t do anything. He laughed while he held you tight. “Let go of me, you idiot!”

“Aww but I wanted to hold you a bit longer!” He smirked as you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I hate you..”

“I love you too!”

nagisa shiota

Nagisa had always been close to you, even before you started to date, he often saw and seized your hot tempered side. He often got called the “y/n Tamer” since he kept you in check and kept you calm. Though you sometimes got called violent, Nagisa knew there was more to that than your hot temper. 

He liked both sides of you. He kind of wished that he was as assertive as you could be. You were usually the one protecting him than him protecting you. It took a small stab at his pride but you always reassured him that you liked him the way that he was. 

He never liked seeing you mad but he did like when your cheeks went red as you get flustered by Karma teasing you.

“y/n, what are you doing?” You can see Nagisa watch you worried as you’re glaring at a bully from B Class that had just made fun of you and Nagisa.

“Can I please beat him up?” You asked him, pulling at the sleeves of your uniform roughly.

“Please don’t do that.” He dropped a sweat at your question, holding your hand to hopefully calm you down.

“Nagisa!” You dragged out his name, nearly whining. You heard another insult from the bully, quickly glaring at the bully. “What do you have to say now, coward?! Fight me!” You challenged as Nagisa is already trying to tug you back towards the E Class classroom. “Let me fight them!” You huffed as he continued to tug you away.

"y/n, I love you but please don't fight anyone.." He said as you both arrive at E Class. "As much as I appreciate you standing up for me, I would like to just ignore them. We have each other and that's okay!" He smiled.

"Nagisa, you're so cute!" You smiled brightly at him, hugging him tightly.

chiba ryuunosuke

Chiba never understood you at first with your sweet yet fiery personality. It nearly scared him during PE classes since you got fired up easily. But curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back. He ended up falling for you. It took a lot to confess to you but he did. When you were around the male, you were so...quiet and sweet. 

The class would’ve thought you were just shy but not until PE classes started. It was no mercy for everyone including Chiba. But in a way, that made him feel respected. You acknowledged his skills and he acknowledged yours. Neither of you went easy on each other just because you were both dating. 

He never saw you off-the-rails mad but it was somewhat entertaining to watch you get a little mad at some trivial thing. 

“Fight me, Chiba!” Now your classmates would’ve been worried if it wasn’t for the fact that this was a daily thing. “I’ll get you this time!” You swore as he silently chuckled at your antics. “Don’t laugh at me!” You huffed.

“Okay, okay. I’ll fight you.” He says softly.

“When you say it like that, I don’t wanna fight you! I want some energy from you, Chiba!” You tell him as you prepare yourself to fight. Before you could even say anything else, he got you down on the ground quick with an anti-Koro knife under your neck. “Hey! I wasn’t ready!”

“An assassin is always on guard.” He mutters to you.

“I want a rematch!”

“Let’s not get carried away, y/n.” A few rematches later and you still lost all of them.

“Chiba! You’re too good! Come on!” You huffed. “I totally was gonna win one today!” You sat on the grass as class was coming to an end. He laughed a bit before wrapping his arms around your waist and easily picking you up. “Hey! Give me a warning next time, Chiba!”

“Class is ending, y/n. We have to get back to our next class with Koro-sensei.” He gets you right back into E Class as you mutter complaints. “I love you, you big baby.”

“I’m not a big baby!”

isogai yuuma

Isogai never seemed bothered by how you got angry often. Professor Bitch was kind of like that in a way. He was used to it. He knew you for a while too, how people made rumors about how violent you were which was a complete lie. For someone who got angry often, you couldn’t even hurt a fly sometimes. He found some entertainment in that. Isogai was definitely the y/n Tamer like Nagisa.

When he first found out about your hot tempered side, it was when you heard people making fun of E Class. Karma was supposedly at the scene as well while he watched you tell off the arrogant students. He decided to make friends with you since you joined E Class not long after Isogai himself had joined.

He never wanted to see you very burning mad and sometimes he didn't wanna deal with your hot tempered self a lot. But let's be real, he still loves you nonetheless.

"Yuu-kun!" You call out to him, using your nickname for him. You had decided to visit him at work, quickly ordering what you normally do.

Unfortunately for him, Asano and a few of his lackeys were here as well. They kept Isogai's job a secret so at least E Class and A Class weren't on full rival terms, but it didn't mean both classes were friends.

The lackeys had started to poke fun at Isogai while he was busy. You were a booth behind the A Class students, biting your tongue back from yelling at the dumb lackeys. But they just kept talking bad about Isogai and E Class. You had enough.

"Can you just shut up!? We still work just as hard as you guys do. You don't know what goes on in our lives! Don't judge a book by its cover!" You tell them.

"y/n, please calm down.." Isogai sighed whilst he placed your order on your table. "It's not worth wasting your time to say things they won't listen to."

"They're just so frustrating!" You mutter as you adjust yourself to sit properly. You started to eat a little bit while your boyfriend left to get out of his work uniform. He came back sitting across from you. "I thought you had work until 6."

"I wanted to spend some time with you. And also I need to keep you in check."

"I can handle myself!" You puff your cheeks out, causing Isogai to chuckle at your antics. "Thank you for the food.." You mutter to him softly.

"I love you too, y/n."

#assassination classroom #assassination classroom x reader #ass class #karma akabane #akabane karma #karma akabane x reader #karma x reader #akabane karma x reader #nagisa shiota #nagisa shiota x reader #shiota nagisa #shiota nagisa x reader #yuuma isogai #yuuma isogai x reader #isogai x reader #isogai yuuma #isogai yuuma x reader #chiba ryuunosuke #chiba ryuunosuke x reader #ryuunosuke chiba x reader #ryuunosuke chiba #anime #anime fluff #anime scenarios

[thatfanficstuff]

Impossible - 18

Pairing: Eric Northman x reader

Warnings: mentions of unwanted touching and assholes thinking of rape (no sexual assault takes place beyond groping)

A/N: This is longish. I'm lazy and didn't edit. If anything is glaring let me know.

***

It was decided that you and Sookie would present as friends looking for a new church. You intended to play quiet and if necessary you would pretend you were the puppet Stan thought you to be until you escaped from your horrible vampire boyfriend. You thought he loved you. Sob. So on and so forth.

Part of you wanted to go with Stan’s idea. Hell, if there was a way to be rid of the Fellowship without it pointing back to the vampires, you’d jump for it in a heartbeat. They were the epitome of everything wrong with so-called religions. Standing behind their gods to justify their hate and prejudices.

You sighed as you pulled into the parking lot. A perky blonde signaled for you to park and you frowned.

“Why does she look familiar?” Sookie asked.

“That’s Sarah Newlin, the reverend’s wife. I’m not happy that it appears we were expected, Sookie. I doubt she greets everyone that pulls in the parking lot.” You clenched your teeth together. Your gut was telling you to just pull right back out of the parking lot, but this was still your best bet to find Godric. “Just be on guard.”

Sookie nodded her head then slipped out of the car with a grin on her face, ready to greet the Mrs. You followed along behind her playing timid.

“Hi,” Sarah exclaimed. “I’m Sarah Newlin. I saw y’all pulling in and thought I’d come out and greet you myself.”

Sookie walked right up to her and shook her hand. “I can’t believe I’m actually getting to meet you. My name is Heidi Merlotte. This is my friend Sylvia North. We’ve recently moved to the area and are looking for a church.”

Sarah shifted that smile to you and held out her hand. You took it gingerly and kept your other arm wrapped around your waist. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sylvia.”

You just nodded in acknowledgement.

“Well, you’re a quiet thing aren’t you?”

Sookie wrapped her arm around you and leaned forward as if sharing a great secret. “We moved to get Sylvia out of a situation, so to speak. She’s still recovering.”

You could almost believe the look of sympathy Sarah directed your way. She turned and motioned for you to follow her. “Well, follow me and we’ll see if Steve’s available. I’m sure he’d just love to meet you.”

“The reverend himself?” Sookie enthused. “That would be amazing.”

The two of you followed Sarah to an office where Steve Newlin sat behind a large desk. “Honey, we’ve got a couple of friends here looking for a church. Heidi Merlotte and Sylvia North.” You shuffled in and took the offered hand, nodding at his greeting before looking around the office. Sarah bent over to whisper something in her husband’s ear that you weren’t meant to hear. “They insinuated they moved to escape some sort of trauma.”

Steve made a sound of agreement before gracing you with that megawatt smile he was so famous for. You settled into your chair, content to let Sookie do all the talking. She always chattered when she was nervous anyway.

“Sylvia and I met in church actually, but we left when we discovered that the pastor was…well he was…” Sookie trailed off dramatically and you managed to resist the urge to roll your eyes.

“Homosexual?” Steve suggested.

Ugh, just when you thought you couldn’t hate this guy more than you already did. What an ass. “A sympathizer. He was a sympathizer,” you said before he could say something else that made you want to punch him in the face.

“Now see, that really makes me mad. How can you claim to love God if you love something God hates?” Too late. You wanted to punch him.

“Well, given Sylvia’s history, we know just how horrible vampires are,” Sookie added after a pause and you wondered what she’d heard in the asshole’s head. “No one will ever convince us that they have any sort of control. They are just evil.”

The Newlins’ attention turned to you with her words. You’d curse her, but this was the plan. You unbuttoned the top button on your shirt and pulled it open to show Eric’s marks. Normally you just wore one, but he’d given you a couple of extra the night before to add to your story. Once they’d seen, you buttoned your shirt back up as if you were ashamed.

You cleared your throat. “He was my boss. He was nice enough at first but then he started catching me in the backroom and feeding. He glamoured me into thinking I enjoyed it. That he loved me. I didn’t know until he came to my house one night and Heidi caught him doing it. She told me everything and helped me escape.” You reached over and grabbed Sookie’s hand. “She saved my life. I truly believe that.”

When you finished with your fantasy, you bent your head forward and wiped away a non-existent tear.

“I am sorry that such a horrible thing happened to you. But that’s what we’re here for is to help people like you. None of this was your fault,” Sarah’s voice comes.

“Thank you. I appreciate that.” You kept your head down so you didn’t have to meet their gazes again. Frankly, you were tired of looking at them.

Steve clapped his hands together. “Well, let’s take a little tour, shall we?”

A tremor of unease crawled down your spine. You were pretty sure the Rev. Newlin’s job description didn’t include giving tours to the peons. You looked up at them, attempting to appear upset instead of untrusting. Sookie and you followed the couple out of the office to what you assumed was the door of the sanctuary.

Steve stopped before opening them and turned to face you. “Now, be careful when I open the doors.”

You arched a brow. “Careful?”

He grinned. “Sometimes when we open these doors, so much love comes flowing out it just knocks you right over.”

You were pretty sure that was the flood of bullshit actually.

“We’ll be sure and brace ourselves,” Sookie responds with a chipper smile.

When they opened the doors, you were actually impressed with the sight that greeted you. The large wall of windows at the back of the church allowed sunlight to flood the sanctuary. It was quite a stunning display. “It’s beautiful.”

“Isn’t it? I just love this room. It just seems to glow in the afternoon light,” Sarah said, obviously meaning every word.

“It’s just so inspiring,” Steve added.

Sookie fidgeted beside you and you knew whatever the reverend was thinking, it wasn’t pleasant. You reached over and hooked your arm with hers.

He looked between the two of you. “Say have you two ever been to a lock-in?”

“A l-lock-in?” Sookie stuttered out.

You gave your brightest, fakest smile and channeled your inner Sookie. “Not since I was a kid. Gosh, those were good times.”

“Well, we’d love to have you join us,” Steve offered.

Whatever he was up to, Sarah didn’t like it if her body language was anything to go by.

Sookie tugged at your arm. “We should go home and get our stuff so we can do the lock-down.”

You looked down to cover your smirk. They were definitely behind Godric’s disappearance then. You understood Sookie wanting to get out of here, if she’d confirmed that, but in all honesty you were the best option for getting Godric out of here without causing a scene.

“You have plenty of time. The lock-inisn’t until tomorrow. Besides, we haven’t finished the tour yet,” Steve said.

“You wanted to see me?” a voice interrupted and Sarah only looked more concerned. A large bald man came to stand by the Newlins. He was obviously their muscle.

“Oh good. Heidi, Sylvia, I’d like you to meet Gabe, one of my aides,” Steve introduced.

Gabe shook your hands while running his gaze over both of you. He licked his lips and you wanted to kick him in the nuts. Maybe later. It would give you something to look forward to.

“Gabe will be joining us for the rest of the tour,” Steve said, patting the other man on the back.

The tour continued far longer than necessary. “I’m sorry but we need to be going. I don’t like to be out after dark,” you said.

“Oh there’s just one more thing I want to show you. It’s a very special part of the tour. Most people don’t get to see it. My father’s tomb.” He sounded entirely too happy about that.

“Steve, are you sure?” Sarah asked.

“Absolutely.”

“I just don’t see why we need to go down there.”

“Not to be rude but I really don’t want to see someone’s grave,” you said.

Steve looked at you. “You have to see it. You can really feel his spirit down there. It’s the cornerstone our church is built on.” He opened a door that led down a steep set of stairs. Creepy basement. Check. And probably no windows. Perfect place to keep a vampire.

Sookie grasped your arm. “Sylvia?”

“What’s the matter?” Steve asked.

“She’s a little claustrophobic,” you lied.

“Well, at least take a little looksee so you can say you saw everything and you can make an informed decision,” the reverend argued.

“But we’ve already decided to go here so I don’t think it’s necessary,” Sookie said, her voice shaking. “We should go, Sylvia.”

“No,” Steve said. “Gabe!” Steve dived for Sookie and Gabe came after you. He grabbed you from behind, crossing his arms over the front of you, copping a cheap feel as he did so. Fucker. Irritation and Anger flooded through you and you knew Eric would pick up on it. He wouldn’t give you long before he came in after the two of you.

It wouldn’t take much for you to get free and to free Sookie as well, but you wouldn’t get a better opportunity to explore the basement. You feigned fighting and let the asshole carry you down the stairs with a firm grip on your breast.

You heard Sookie fighting behind you. “A little help, Gabe. I think the fucking banger’s on V,” Steve yelled.

“Quit fighting, Heidi. You’ll only get hurt,” you called and heard the commotion die down. At least she trusted you enough to do what you said.

They carried the two of you into a storage cage and locked you in after taking Sookie’s purse and searching both of you. As soon as they were out of sight and you heard the door shut upstairs, Sookie turned to you. “I sure as hell hope you have a plan because that Gabe guy is a total asshole.”

You hummed in agreement and pulled your lockpicking tools from your hair. They looked like barrettes and bobby pins to the untrained eye. “My plan is to find Godric before Eric gets here to rescue us.”

“You seem sure he’ll come,” she said, sounding surprised.

“I am. And if he doesn’t, I’ll get us out. Don’t worry about it.” You moved over to the gate to see the best way to go about getting the two of you out. The chain link configuration complicated things a bit but you’d figure it out.

“You’re always so sure about things. I wish I was like that.”

“A little bit of uncertainty makes life exciting,” you said with a grin before grabbing the gate and shaking it to see how sturdy it was. Keeping your grip you leaned against it. “Little god, little god, it’s time to go home,” you said in a singsong voice. Godric would hear you if he was anywhere in the basement.

“Little god?”

“Long story,” you assured her and shook the gate again. “Good news, the gate is designed to keep people out, not in. Also good news, I’m not completely human.”

“What’s the bad news?” she asked.

“This will be loud.” Unfortunately, the only top to the cage was the ceiling so there was nothing above you to grab onto. Instead, you grabbed onto the chain link beside the gate and used it to swing your body at an angle so your feet hit right where the lock was. You repeated the action two more times before dropping down so you could check the lock.

“Little god, I’m not leaving without you. I know you like me too much to let me die,” you said distracted as your focus was on the gate. You’d definitely done some damage but you decided to keep your feet on the ground and see what kind of damage side kicks could do.

After the second kick, you heard the door upstairs open. “What’s going on down there?” Gabe. Good.

“Nothing,” you called back even as you kicked again and the lock gave way. You grabbed the gate and pulled it shut as his feet thundered down the stairs.

He glared at the two of you before finally settling on you. You had no idea what Sookie looked like behind you but you were giving your best evil grin. “What are you up to, you little bitch?”

“That’s no way to talk to a lady,” you taunted, waiting for him to get closer.

“You’re not a lady,” he said. “You’re just some vampire’s whore.” He licked his lips and looked you over again as he pulled keys from his pocket. When he caught sight of the lock, he frowned and moved forward, “What the hell?”

Once he was within striking distance, you slammed the gate forward so it cracked him in the head and shoved him back. You didn’t give him time to recover before you attacked with punches and kicks. He got a couple of hits in as he tried to take you down. To regain the upper hand. But you weren’t about to let that happen. Finally, you got in position to put your arm around his neck. You kept the hold up until he dropped to his knees. When you would have continued until he quit breathing, a hand dropped on your shoulder.

“Enough.”

You looked to Godric. He wasn’t your sire. You had no loyalty to him, but he was a friend. You released Gabe and took a step back. Your gaze ran over the little god. Other than being paler than usual, he looked good. The corner of his mouth lifted in a smile. That was all the invitation you needed to wrap your arms around him.

He returned the hug. He moved his nose near your neck and inhaled. “You smell like my child.”

“Mates.”

He held you at arms length and looked at you in surprise. “He’ll come for you then. Not that he wouldn’t have anyway.”

“Oh, yeah. I figure we’re about out of time.” You gestured to the cage. “Godric, meet Sookie. Sookie, Godric.”

Sookie gave him a smile and a little wave. “Nice to meet you.”

His mouth set in a firm line and his gaze settled on you. “You brought a human with you to rescue me?”

“She’s a little something else, if that makes you feel any better.”

“Not particularly, no. Especially considering what this one would have done had you not been who you are,” he gestured at Gabe.

“Speaking of, you should let me kill him. He groped me.” Reminded of the earlier incident you moved over to the prone form and nudged him so he was laying on his back. Then you kicked him in the balls as hard as you could. “Asshole.”

Godric’s lips twitched. “Feel better?”

“Much.” Sounds of a fight came from upstairs. “Eric.”

“Yes. I am here, my child. Down here.”

In a flash Eric was there. He stopped in front of you first, holding your arms as he looked you over. “I’m fine.”

He nodded once before turning to his maker. “Godric,” he said almost reverently before kneeling in front of him.

The moment was interrupted by Sookie’s laughter. The three of you turned your attention to her. She had a hand over her mouth as she tried to quiet herself. She shook her head. “I’m sorry. It’s just Eric is all respectful and kneeling while you hugged him and called him little god. It’s just funny.”

Eric got to his feet and gave you a look. “Of course, you did.”

“What? Godric likes my hugs.”

#eric northman x reader #eric northman fanfiction #true blood fanfiction #eric northman x you #impossible #series

[love-hatred-stuff]

No More } Choi San [ateez]

genre: angst

warning(s): slight obsession, mention of a break up, a bit suggestive

word count: 1.7k

notes: I don't have much time to write nowadays but I will upload a part 2 soon, I promise!!!^^

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

He had tried everything. He tried confessing his feelings to you, he tried confessing his love. He tried being more masculine and demanding, he even tried submitting completely to you. But still, you were a desired girl here in this city, of course it wasn't that easy. Maybe it all had gone wrong because he mainly just imagined making a move on you.

The biggest step he had ever took in real life was when he found the courage to speak to you and became friends with you finally. But that was almost a year ago and he still couldn't figure out how to get you to like him too.

San would do absolutely any and everything to be your boyfriend. He wants you since he first saw your enlightening smile. It was a smile he would never get tired of admiring.

San wants to be yours, no matter how long it would take for him to confess. He would get you to love him back, wouldn't he?

And at the same time he was scared to death to scare you away. He was someone special and different from everyone around you. San was light-hearted, handsome, competitive and one day he would be shy, and the other day he would be confident. Just sad, that whenever he was with you he became really insecure sometimes.

He was in love with you and didn't know how to show you properly. It was like a curse for him, he just wanted you to use him to your happiness! Was that too much to ask?

However, he still had hope, it wouldn't die until you would break things off with him. But you weren't planning to. You found him cute and pretty. You maybe even had a little crush on him. Through all the time you two spend together you learnt what kind of a person he is, and you figured he was one of the kindest, smartest and loveliest people you ever met in your live.

So why would you not like him?

The thing was, you just weren't as obsessed with him as he was with you. Although he tried to be not clingy, he loved your affection and touch, so he always hugged you longer than needed or stood closer to you than everyone else.

Until one day, you got closer than you would have thought. Out of sharing sweet kisses got a close relationship and the dream of San was fulfilled. The other boys always were jealous how he was able to kiss you on the campus or hold your waist and hand whenever he desired. But he was smart and strong, able to fight them if he needed to.

Of course he knew how lucky he was to date someone as special as you and his obsession only grew. You weren't aware of what scenarios played in his mind all the time, what he wanted you to do to him.

He would like to be used.. by you. But he kept it to himself for a long time. But even if he had this strong feelings, he still was a little, delicate boy to you. Caused by his overprotectiveness and love to have you as close as possible, he got very clingy.

You almost always understood and accepted his affection but sometimes you needed space because you had other obligations than to cuddle your boyfriend and it got too much. It didn't scare you away, it just made you aware of the fact that he may feels more for you than you for him. Of course you loved him with you whole heart, though it just been about six months in this relationship and you wouldn't say that he was your reason to live yet. You would hate to live without him but you could do it anyways.

You always asked yourself if maybe you just had problems catching feelings. Because for a long time you just couldn't handle any boy near you. You weren't exactly cold-hearted but it felt like your heart had been frozen until you met San, it needed time to warm up now. You just couldn't give him all of you only in a few months.

When he was too much to handle and you got angry at him or began being the dominant one, he easily started sobbing. All he wanted was you, not anyone else could still his needs like you did, he never wanted to leave you or the other way around. So he was emotional when he was scared of you letting him alone.

Gladly you never did, you always where there to comfort him, even if you where the reason for him being so upset.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎ present ▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

It bothered him how you stopped replying to his texts and answering his calls. It bothered him so much, it needed everything of him to not break down right then and there. It's been a day without getting any sign of you and he started to think you forgot about him or just simply didn't want him anymore. He knew you were fine -or at least alive- because he could see that you had read his messages and experienced how you declined his calls.

(10 new massages)

|San|: [why aren't you answering?] >09:23pm< seen

|San|: [please, just tell me you’re fine and not mad at me] >09:24pm< seen

He sighed, laying his face inside his hands, acting out the desperation he felt, trying to be strong.

|you|: [no, I'm fine. I just don't have time for you right now San, sorry] >09:26<

You weren't in the mood to reply more right now. You needed time for yourself. And you weren't mad at him, you only needed a break of him at this moment. The both of you saw each other every single day, even if you were busy, he insisted on visiting you. Not that you didn't enjoy his company, the thing was, that you came to the conclusion that he may was a bit obsessed with you.

When you were busy, you were busy, and he has to accept that at one point but he didn't. So you chose to ignore him for awhile to get your stuff done without any intervention.

When he saw your text, he felt relieved but something was bothering him again. You had no time for him? It's either supposed mean what it says, or it means that you were mad and would hate to see his face right now.

|San|: [okay, just please call me when you are ready, alright?] >09:26< seen

|San|: [I miss u :(] >09:27< seen

|you|: [I will. Sleep well] >09:28<

The coldness that came with your words made his heart scrunch in pain. He knew that you didn't miss him right now, you were tired of seeing him every day. And he tried to understand but still felt the need to visit you and make whatever he did wrong up to you. But he resisted this urge and stayed where he was, thinking it would be the best to leave you alone for a bit.

•••

A bit. Yeah, a bit was good. He'd thought "a bit" would have lasted shorter. Though it expanded to two whole days. And you barely had ever answered his texts.

The more time flew by, the more he got desperate. He cried himself to sleep the last two nights. It was affecting him so much, more than he would have thought. He knew you were his everything, but that he wouldn't be able to stand three days without your presence surprised him.

And at this point he would give everything to get you back in his arms. So he thought how he could make you feel better about him again. San had thought about many ways to do that but almost all his plans seemed to not be pretty thought through. Not matter how many times he tried getting new ideas, -he even googled how to get his girlfriend back-, his mind always came back to one solution. Although he had a bad feeling about it. He had no other choice. What else could give him back his joy of life? He had to seduce you.

Wasn't good sex what all girls wanted at this age? He asked himself first, but he shook his head in disgust. You weren't a girl like every other. And especially not about the sexual act. You were humble and patient, he knew that. That's why you both never spoke up this topic. Of course you turned him on and stuff but as long as you were in his arms, open to have any other physical contact, he didn't need to sleep with you yet.

It wasn't exactly why you were bored, but maybe you thought it could be fun to try something new. It didn't had to be sex, but what else was left to try? Exactly. Not too much.

San made himself ready to meet up with you before sending you a message to ask if you were home. Fortunately you were, and sighed when you saw your phone blink from the twentieth text he had send you.

God, was this childish. You groaned and rolled your eyes. And you were actually disgusted of your own behaviour after doing all this to him. He'd done nothing, so what was making you disapproving him so much?

Because you felt bad about avoiding your boyfriend, you texted him back, informing him that you were home. Sooner or later, you had to bring it behind you.

You didn't notice how wet your eyes got from thinking about having to break up. Because you really didn't want to, it was just.. getting too much and not enough at the same time. Your close connection was no more. Was it?

San was overly happy suddenly when he read your message. And so he got on his way to your apartment right away.

••• to be continued •••

>>>part 2

#choi san #kpop imagines #ateez angst #ateez imagines

[octopustophat]

Tamaki Amajiki X FTM Reader

It’s your first day as an official sidekick at the Fat Gum agency, and you can’t breathe, and you don’t think it’s from your binder. You take in the entrance to the building with awe

This is it! You’re really a hero now!

Bounding into the building with all the excitement of a 5 year old in a candy store, you make your way to the receptionist. As soon as she acknowledges you, you say, “Hi! I’m Connor! my hero name is Magpie. I’m Fat Gum’s new sidekick!” “Oh! Fat Gum told me to expect you today!” She said. With a few quick keystrokes, she checks you in, and directs you to the elevator across the lobby. “Head right on in there, and go to the 9th floor. He should be in his office. I’ll let him know you’re heading up!” Smiling and thanking her, you head to the elevators, and make your way up. You bounce on the balls of your feet in nervousness. Although, you have of course met Fat Gum before and even worked with him, this is your first official day as his sidekick, and the pressure is starting to get to you. Before you can think about that more though, the elevator doors open, and you’re greeted by the double doors of his office. Walking up, you hear the voice of your new boss followed by a much quieter, almost nervous voice. You give a polite knock at the door, and you hear the voice of Fat Gum welcoming you in.

Peaking your head in before the rest of your body follows, You see the huge smiling face of Fat Gum of course, but you look to the side to see the face (or well, the cowering hood of) what could only be the pro-hero Suneater. You’re a huge fan of him. He graduated 2 years before you, but you know how incredible of a pro-hero he is from the work he has already accomplished as a sidekick only 2 years into his pro-hero career. You immediately begin staring at your shoes to avoid any possible eye contact, and Fat Gum speaks up. “HEY MAGPIE! It’s a pleasure to see you again! Are you ready for your first day of real hero work?” You immediately look up smiling, and your excitement is back. “Absolutely sir! I am beyond excited and honored for the opportunity to work alongside you and the amazing Suneater” You bend into a respectful bow, so you don’t get to see the bright red blush spread across Suneater’s face. “A-Amazing?!” he says before stepping a little behind where Fat Gum is sitting to shield himself from you.

Raising up from your bow, sheepishly glance up and say “of course… I’ve seen you on TV working with Fat Gum. You may have only been a hero for 2 years, but you definitely shine out there on the field!” Your compliment makes Tamaki inch his way entirely behind Fat Gum’s form.

Fat Gum chuckles and introduces the 2 sidekicks “Suneater, this is Magpie. His quirk allows him to seek out helpful objects and seal them away in a pocket dimension he calls his “nest” that he can pull from later on. While those objects are in the nest, they are frozen in time, so they do not alter or decay. He does have to make physical contact with the object though to seal it away. And Magpie, this is Suneater, and by the sounds of it you already know what his quirk is”

“Yes I do sir! I must say, manifest is one of the coolest quirks I’ve ever seen!” Your compliment once again strikes Amajiki right in his quivering heart. In a brief moment of courage though, he squeaks out “Not as cool as your quirk though. I’m sure it’s loads more helpful in battle than mine is.”

To quickly stop Amajiki from degrading himself further, Fat Gum steps in and says “You both are very powerful heroes, and you have your own strengths. This is why I will be partnering you two together! Suneater here will show you the ropes, give you the tour, and you will be going out with me on patrol starting in an hour.” Because he is hiding behind Fat Gum. You don’t have the pleasure of seeing Amajiki’s brief panic about having to be around you. Not because of anything you’ve done, but solely because of how attractive and cool you look. Amajiki is startled from his thoughts though by Fat Gum saying “Suneater, do you mind if Magpie and I have a moment to speak before you guys start the tour?” Amajiki immediately nods his head and rushes out of the room. With a slight chuckle, he turns his attention to you.

“Now Connor, I am aware of your… condition, but I want you to know that you will have nothing to worry about here. Our locker rooms have stalls in which you can change and shower comfortably, and of course you will be allowed to use the men’s locker room. As for who else will know about your status, that is entirely up to you. It is not my information to share and it is frankly no one else’s business whether or not you tell anyone. I don’t want you to be ashamed though. This is a safe place for you, and I will make sure you are welcomed by everyone, or they will have to answer to me. Understood?”

With Fat Gum’s speech, you are moved near tears. Being trans was something you seriously worried about when starting your hero career, and to see Fat Gum so supportive, it feels like a weight is off your chest.

“Th-Thank you so much sir. I’d really like to keep it a secret. At least for now. I’ve spent so long trying to pass. I’m just not sure I’m ready to deal with ignorant people again”

Fat Gum nods his head in acknowledgement, and says “alrighty then. So long as you know you’re safe here, I will support you in whatever decision you make.”

“Thank you sir”

“Of course! Now get outta here. Go meet up with Suneater, he’ll show you around, and then meet me down out front for our patrol in an hour”

With a new found pep in your step, you make your way out to a waiting Amajiki.

“Hi Suneater. Shall we get started?” “Y-Yeah. Let’s go”

After a mostly silent tour, except for Suneater quietly saying the names of each room you go into, you make your way out the front of the building to begin your first patrol as a sidekick!

~ <3 ~ After an uneventful patrol, and some necessary paperwork, you make your way to the locker rooms to shower and change. Luckily, because of the odd time, there was no one in there, so you didn’t even have to worry about anyone else bothering you. You grab your change of clothes, and make your way to a shower stall.

You work your way out of your hero costume, and the specialty binder attached to it. It was made specifically so you could exercise in it, and it's fitted into the suit itself, so it isn’t suspicious. It really makes you feel like your chest is really as flat as you want it. You quickly shower and start to put on fresh clothes only to find that your regular binder isn’t there. You search around for it, but nope, you definitely left it in your bag. You carefully listen in to the rest of the locker room, and after double checking to make sure you don’t hear anyone and even calling out “hello?” into the locker room and no one answering, you decide to make a mad dash for your bag not wanting to put your dirty hero costume back on after showering.

You make a stealthy speed walk out of the shower stall, round the corner to your locker, only to come face to face with a half naked Amajiki. You both scream simultaneously out of shock and mortification, and you grab your bag and run back to the shower stall, but there’s no denying that you watched him glance at your obvious chest before he looked away.

Mortified, you sink to the slightly wet floor and you begin to hyperventilate

Oh my god He saw He knows He’s gonna hate me What if he tells everyone? What if they hate me?! I can’t believe I actually thought I could be stealth here and have it work out.

Your thoughts start to spiral darker and darker as tears begin to make their way down your cheeks, and you hate yourself more and more.

Tamaki is standing still in a daze when he hears you crying in the showers. This snaps him out of his stupor, and he has a thought process of his own.

Why is he crying? Was I really that gross to look at? Wait Did he have breasts? Why would he have breasts? OH MY GOD I JUST LOOKED AT HIS BREASTS Is he… trans? Oh my god I’ve messed up. I have to fix this.

Gathering what shred of courage he has, he makes his way to the showers. Knocking on the door, he whispers out “Connor?” After hearing the cries muffle into sniffles he continues “Are you trans?”. With this the cries start back up again. Amajiki panics and begins to ramble “I-If you are trans that’s totally ok! Th-That’s your b-business! But y-you should know th-that I don’t think any less of you!! You’re still more of a m-man than I’ll ever be!!!”

With that, the cries are back down to little sniffles, and a broken “what?” comes from behind the stall door. Amajiki hears shuffling from behind the door, and the sound of the lock clicking. The door creaks open, and he sees a disheveled Connor peeking from the crack in the door “you can’t possibly mean that. I don’t even have a man’s body” Amajiki’s eyes widen and he gets a look of determination on his face. “Of course! You’re more of a man than I’ll ever be! You’re more handsome, stronger, more quick witted, and manlier than I could ever be!”

More tears begin to stream down Connor’s face, and he crashes into Amajiki, wrapping his arms around him. Amajki freezes for a moment before carefully wrapping his arms around him. The two stay like that for a moment before Connor says “Don’t you EVER put yourself down like that. You don’t deserve it. You are so much stronger than you believe and a better person than most, so don’t you ever believe otherwise!” A quiet “I’ll try” comes from Amajiki before the two separate from their hug. Amajiki lowers his eyes, and Connor quietly asks, “Do you really think I’m handsome?” Amajiki looks up in surprise and says “O-Of course! H-How could anyone n-not believe that?!” Connor with a blush on his face says “Well you’re incredibly handsome too. You should know that.” With a bashful silence falling over the room, Connor is the first to speak up.

“H-Hey Suneater-” “Amajiki” he interrupts “call me Amajiki… please” With a smile on his face, Connor continues “Well A-Amajiki, would you like to come get dinner with me? I know an amazing ramen restaurant not far from here.” Amajiki’s eyes widen, and a blushing grin covers his face “I’d like that very much, but only i-if you’re sure about that! I-I’d hate to bother you.” “You could never bother me Amajiki. So it’s a date?” you offer shyly. Amajiki looks down “a-a date… I’d like that.” So after finishing packing away your respective things, you guys begin to make your way to the ramen restaurant, side by side, and excited for what’s to come.

You think this might be the best first day at work you could have had.

#x ftm reader #x reader #x male reader #tamaki amajiki #ftm #trans reader #tamaki amajiki x reader #tamaki x reader #amajiki x reader