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#he jumps on any excuse to get mad at me its fucking comical at this point
wonderfilworld · 3 years
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Tease - J.P.
James Potter x reader where you tease him all night and he loses it.
a/n: this is for a request: “so i wanted one which like y/n was teasing james all night and when they go to the room dom james and like punishing us”
word count: 3.3k
warnings/contains: NSFW!! smut: daddy!kink, oral, choking, unprotected sex; kissing, cursing. Let me know if I missed anything!
Masterlist   Send in a request 
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It started before you left for dinner. 
James noticed you decided to wear that dress. The dress that showed off a little cleavage and a lot of leg. And it wasn’t that James didn’t like the dress - the opposite, actually - but let’s just say that James can’t exactly control himself around you in it. And how could he? You looked like an actual goddess and James was just doing his part by worshipping you. 
So no, the problem wasn’t that you were wearing the dress, the problem was that the two of you were going out to dinner with some friends tonight and, well, he couldn’t exactly jump your bones in the middle of a crowded restaurant. 
Well he didn’t really have a problem with it, but he figured you would so that’s why he respectfully tried to jump your bones before dinner, like a gentleman. 
“You’re so beautiful, baby,” he said as he stood behind you. You were in front of the mirror trying to put your earrings on. It was proving to be a bit difficult, however, with your boyfriend nibbling on your earlobe. 
“James, stop,” you said as he started planting wet kisses on the side of your neck. They were hot, open mouthed kisses, and when he got to the base of your neck he started sucking and licking, and you knew what he was trying to do. “We’re going to be late.” 
“Don’t care,” he said, words muffled against your skin as he kissed his way back up your neck. His hands were wrapped around your front, one making its way to your breasts, giving them a firm squeeze one at a time as he takes your earlobe between his teeth once more. 
You drop your head back on his shoulder and indulge him a little, letting him have his fun before you had to leave. Truthfully, you did wear that dress for a reason, you know he loves it on you, and you thought it would be fun to tease him a little bit, know he can’t resist you when you wear it. 
The hand that’s not fondling your breasts are traveling down your front, hooking under your dress and sliding up your bare thigh. You finally stop him then, grabbing the hand that’s inches away from your cunt and pulling it out of your dress before turning around to face him. “Nuh-uh, we’re leaving,” you tell him.
James actually pouts, bottom lip jutting out almost comically, as a whine leaves his throat. “Just five minutes, baby, please. Let me make you feel good.”
And his hand tries to make its way back under your dress as he leans in for a kiss. You grab his hand, holding it away from your body - but you do give him his kiss, planting a quick peck to his lips. 
James huffs as you walk away, watching the way the fabric of the dress hangs to your hips as they sway from side-to-side. He readjusts his pants, praying the tent in them has disappeared by the time you meet up with your friends. 
Tease.
---
During dinner, things only got worse. 
The two of you sat side-by-side, thighs touching as you laughed along with your friends. Every so often you would place your hand on his thigh, squeezing the muscle as your friends talked. 
James was sure you were doing it on purpose, the way your hand moved up and down his thigh was too similar to the way you moved your hand up and down his cock, squeezing every so often. He was so sure the tent would return to his pants; his dick straining against the fabric, desperate for your touch, and James was going to fucking lose it. James absolutely hates being teased; he’d much rather do the teasing, likes it very much when you’re writhing under him as he gives you orgasm after orgasm, your pretty body covered in sweat begging for more because you can never get enough of him.
It made him angry, almost, at the fact that he had tried to have you before the two of you left, but you said no. He knows you didn’t care about being late - you never have before - so he was sure you did it just to get a rise out of him. 
And it was fucking working. 
---
By the end of dinner, James was ready to leave that stupid fucking restaurant, take you home, and ask you what the fuck you thought you were doing. 
Thankfully, that moment came sooner rather than later as your friends said goodbye to you for the night, and James quickly grabbed your hand and apparated you back home. 
You arrived in your living room, stumbling from the way James practically threw your arm out of his grasp. He shrugged off his jacket almost violently as he stalked towards the bedroom. You follow him timidly; your brazen actions from earlier starting to create feelings of regret deep in your gut. You had hoped that once you got home James would pounce, devouring you and showering you in love and praise like normal. But now he seems almost mad, and you desperately wish you could go back in time. 
When you get to the bedroom, you see the bathroom door open and you can hear James brushing his teeth. You go to join him, toeing your shoes off as you tuck your hair behind your ears. 
You stand in the doorway and see that James has removed his shirt, and you watch the way the muscles in his back flex as he moves the toothbrush within his mouth. His pants are unbuckled, hanging low on his hips as he stands there. 
You look into the mirror and see him staring at you; his eyes are blank, almost bored but you know better, know that you’re in big trouble. Your hands shake slightly as you reach for your own toothbrush, spreading toothpaste onto it before running it under the water and bringing it to your mouth. 
You brush your teeth in silence - toothpaste comes out the sides of your mouth and he’s still looking at you and you want to tell him to stop, but you know you’re in for it already and you definitely don’t want to make it worse. 
James finishes, spits out the toothpaste, and rinses his mouth before leaving you alone in the bathroom. You sigh before repeating him, walking out and entering the bedroom. He’s removed his pants now, sitting on his side of the bed in only his boxers, and you strip to your underwear as well before you join him. 
“Did you think that was funny?”
You sigh, here we go, and say, “What do you mean?” 
He turns and looks at you, and you can see that he’s not in the mood for games, doesn’t want to listen to your excuses, and you gulp before you say, “I didn’t think it was funny.”
“But you did it anyway.”
“I’m sorry,” you tell him, and it’s partly true. You’re sorry that your plan didn’t go as you’d hoped, sorry that he’s angry at you for teasing him. “Jus’ wanna make you feel good,” you reason with him.
You lean over and place a hand on his back, rubbing softly before bringing your hand up to play with his hair. 
But James isn’t having it, grabs your hand, and yanks your body over until his face is a hair’s breadth away from yours. “You wanted to make me feel good by teasing me all night?”
“Daddy,” you pout, hoping the title he often bears in bed will make him take pity on you. “‘M sorry. Didn’t wanna make you mad.”
James scoffs but releases his hold on your wrist. “Y’wanted to make me feel good, hm?” His hand rests on your cheek now, almost sweetly, but you know better; can still feel the anger radiating off of him. 
But you nod your head furiously anyway, wanting desperately to make it all better, to have your sweet and loving boyfriend back. “Yes, daddy,” Your eyes are wide; rounded out as you pout. “Please let me.”
James studies your face; he knows that you know he’s angry, that he’s not going to be gentle tonight, and he wants to make sure that you want this before he continues. He looks for any sign of hesitation in your eyes but finds none. 
So with that in mind, he instructs you, “Get on your knees.” 
You waste no time, sliding to the floor and settling on your knees. The hardwood is cold against your skin, and you use it to ground yourself as James situates himself on the end of the bed. 
You’re between his spread legs, and you watch as he takes his dick out of his boxers, watches as he spits in his hand before grabbing his cock and pumping. 
You whine, you want to do that, but James gives you a harsh look as he tells you to “Shut up.” 
You watch as he strokes his cock, at the way he swipes his thumb over the head of it, and sighs through his nose. He looks so good like that - stroking his cock as he looks at you - and you pout again, silently begging him to let you take over. 
“Come here,” he instructs. You lean forward and go to grab his cock but he stops you, “Keep your hands to yourself.” So you place your hands on your thighs instead. 
You open your mouth and present your tongue. “There’s a good girl,” he mutters, watching as your lips envelop his cock. 
You swipe your tongue along his slit, swallowing the precum that’s gathered there. You moan, this is what you’ve been waiting for, and James groans when he feels the vibrations from it. 
One of his hands holds your hair, slowly guiding your head up and down his length. You look up at him, and god, he looks amazing: head thrown back, mouth hung open, eyebrows furrowed. You swell with pride at the fact that you can make him like this, and you want more, so you try your best to breathe through your nose as you sink down as far as you can on his cock. 
James chokes on his breath, and it’s not until you feel his pubic hair against your nose do you realize that you took all of him. But almost as soon as your lips meet the base of his prick does your gag reflex react, forcing you off his cock completely as you cough. 
You bring a hand up to wipe the spit from your mouth as you look up to James, “Sorry,” you say.
“Don’t be,” is all he says before grabbing your head and bringing it back down to his spit-covered cock. 
You open your mouth, taking him in as you sink back down again. It’s easier this time, and you find that you can make it all the way down with little irritation, but can only hold there for so long before you are forced to come back up. 
You keep this routine, mouth sliding up and down James’ cock as you run your tongue along the underside of it. Every so often you’ll stop to give special attention to the head, sucking softly at it before sinking right back down again. 
“Fuck,” James groans, he can’t tear his eyes away from the image of your head bobbing on his cock, can only focus on the sound your mouth makes as you suck him off. He can feel the way your tongue moves up and down, the way your mouth suctions around the tip and it’s making him go crazy. He wants to hold your head in his hands and use your mouth; fuck your face and watch as you drool all over his cock and you can’t do anything but just take it. 
But he doesn’t want to hurt you, and unless you specifically ask for that, he’s content with this - his hands are there as a guide for you; not pushing or pulling, simply a comfortable weight that he knows you love to have when you suck him off. 
He lets out another low groan before he speaks again. “You like sucking daddy’s cock, baby?”
You whine at his filthy words, the shockwave of lust they bring shooting south, pooling in your panties. You nod as best as you can around him, not wanting to part with his cock for even a second, wanting to drink every last drop he gives you.
But he tugs your head off of him rather harshly as he speaks, “Get up.” 
You do as he says, rising to your feet on shaky legs. James stands as well, directs your body to lie down on your back. His fingers hook under the waistband of your panties and he pulls them down, watching as the slick from your cunt connects to them.
He brings two fingers to your core feeling the wetness there. You moan as he plays with you, watch as he brings them back up to his face to stick them in his mouth.
James grabs at your legs and hikes them over the shoulders of his still-standing form and you whimper. 
“This is for my pleasure, do you understand?” His tone is harsh, and it sends a chill down your spine. His hand finds its way to your throat and he gives it a firm squeeze. 
“Yes, daddy,” you say quickly, not wanting to give him a reason to delay this any longer, you’ve needed him to fuck you all night, and now that you have the opportunity you are not going to let it get away. 
James wastes no time guiding his thick cock into your cunt; where he would usually go slow, he instead pushes in swiftly, knocking the breath from your lungs. You grunt, tilting your head back as your eyes shut tightly. James’ hand is still encompassing your throat, a firm, unyielding necklace keeping you from moving away from the harsh thrusts he gives you. 
He relentlessly pounds into you; your head bouncing off the mattress with each snap of his hips into yours. The swirling of arousal in your stomach tightens with each tap of his cock against the sensitive spot in your cunt. Your cries of pleasure are loud and they’re building by the second. 
“S’this what you fuckin’ wanted?” James asks, fingers of the hand not on your throat melding bruises on the flesh of your hip where he holds you. “Wanted me to fuck you like this?” 
And you try to say yes, but it’s so hard to speak as James manhandles your body. The sound of skin-slapping-skin echoes around the room, as does the way James grunts as your cunt repeatedly tightens around his cock. 
“You’re so fuckin’ tight - shit,” He tells you, ending his sentence with a firm squeeze to your throat. He’s not constricting your air-flow by any means, just keeping his hand there as a way to tell you he can if you’re not good. “I fuck you all the time and you still feel like a fucking virgin.” 
“Please,” you beg, “‘m so close.” your voice comes out shaky due to the distracting turning of your stomach and the way that James is still pounding into you without mercy. 
“Don’t you dare,” he warns. He pulls out of you then, and you cringe at the lewd sound your pussy makes when he does so. 
The hand around your throat leaves to grip the other side of your body as James picks you up, turns you around, and maneuvers your body until you’re on your knees on the bed, face pressed into the mattress as James continues his unabated rhythm against your poor cunt. 
You want to reach down and rub your clit so bad; it’s aching and you know you won’t get a reprieve from the burning in your belly until you do.
“Daddy,” you whimper. “Please, please, please.” 
“This isn’t about you,” he growls. “Now take my fucking cock.”
He’s mean and you can’t lie and say you don’t love it because you do, you know he can feel the way your pussy flutters around him when he says those filthy words.
But apparently, he wants more from you, doesn’t like how silent you’ve become. And it’s not because it doesn’t feel good - it fucking does - but you’re too focused on not cumming that you can’t cry out like you want to, can’t acknowledge the fact that his cock repeatedly rubs against that spot inside of you that makes you go fucking crazy. 
So, he wraps his arms around your front, one returning to your neck as the other anchors your bottom half on his cock, and pulls your body to press flush against his perspiring chest as he tells you what he’s going to do. 
“I’m gonna cum in this tight fuckin’ cunt,” he starts, speaking into your ear as your body rocks with his. “And you’re gonna take all of it.” 
“Yes, daddy,” you’re out of breath, body exhausted. “Want it all,” you mewl.  
He’s cumming then, hot spurts coating the inside of your cunt as he holds you against him. Your mouth drops open at the feeling; at the fact that it’s so much, still coming out of his spent cock and dripping out of you and down your thighs. 
You're gripping his arms like a vice, refusing to let go because you know you’ll fall face first onto the bed if you do. He’s still going, determined to give you every last drop. 
Finally he pulls out, turns your body, and lays you down on your back. He opens your legs, kneels on the ground and watches as his cum leaks from your pussy. 
He presses kisses to the inside of your thigh as he whispers, “So good, baby, so good for me.” 
You squirm from the praise and the feeling of James’ lips against your sensitive skin. You haven’t cum yet and it’s frustrating - there’s a burning knot in your stomach and it radiates through your whole body. 
“Daddy,” you say again, voice whiny and small. 
“I know, I know,” he says, and he brings a hand to your messy pussy and rubs his thumb against your clit. 
“Ah,” Your body jerks, nearly shoots all the way up - you’re so sensitive - and you didn’t expect it to be so intense when he touched you. 
But he’s rubbing small circles furiously on your bundle of nerves as you try your hardest to wiggle away, he has his other arm draped over your lower stomach and there’s nowhere for you to go. You realize that you’re crying, fat tears rolling down the expanse of your cheeks as you sob out for James, that you can’t take it anymore.
“Come on, baby,” James encourages you, “Cum all over daddy’s fingers.”
And the ball within your belly explodes, fire shooting through every vein in your body as you yell out a mantra of daddy, daddy, daddy! 
Your eyes are shut so tightly that you see white specs float across your eyelids. Your head is back, spine arched as James continues to play with your puffy clit, determined to help you ride out this orgasm as long as possible. 
Your body slumps back on the bed, chest heaving as James gets up and leans over your body to brush the hair out of your face. 
You open your eyes and are met with the concerned face of your boyfriend. “Hey, baby, you still with me?” 
You smile softly at him, you’re so exhausted you can’t manage anything other than to bring your hand up to his face, running your thumb along his cheek. “Hi,” you whisper. 
He smiles then, standing back up as he tells you, “gonna go get something to clean you up with.”
He walks off, and you lie there, chest heaving up and down, and you smile to yourself. 
“I love you!” you shout to him as he enters the bathroom. 
“Yeah, yeah,” he says, and you can hear the smile in his voice. 
So maybe your plan was a success after all. 
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Noir Spots Chapter 5
Chapter Five: Seeing Rouge
do you get it? 
the title
its a fucking pun
i am so god damn hilarious
---
Marinette Dupain-Cheng did not have a crush on Noir.
She couldn't, they didn't know anything about each other.
She couldn't fall for another gem-eyed blonde dressed like a cat.
She couldn't.
She wouldn't. 
It didn't matter how sweet Noir was. How adorable her blush was. The way she winked and smiled and flipped her hair and--
She did not have a crush on Noir.
So why was she daydreaming about her in class instead of paying attention?
Because, because she was doing her job!
Yes! She needed to think about Noir so she could find out her identity!
Because what if Noir turned bad? Who would get the Miraculous back?
Noir was far too graceful and beautiful to let her ring get taken away!
She was too perfect to let that happen!
And then what about Plagg? What would he do with another wayward cat?
Yes, that's why Marinette was daydreaming--thinking--about the beautiful blonde with crystal blue eyes and golden hair.
For work reasons.
No other reasons.
No other--
"Marinette?"
Her head shot up so fast, Marinette thought she might have whiplash.
That would be an embarrassing way to die.
"Uh...yes?" She asked, blinking at the girl in front of her desk.
Alya.
Why was Alya in front of her desk?
Marinette looked around the room, seeing that Madame Bustier was gone--probably disregarding her job again--and the rest of the last was not so subtly eavesdropping.
"I--I--" she took a deep breath, looking slightly nervous. That was weird, Alya didn't get nervous. "Do you want to hang out tonight? We could go see a movie or something."
What?
Alya wanted to hang out with her?
The last time they had hung out was...almost two years ago.
"You...you want to hang out with me?" Marinette hated the way her voice cracked.
She hated that she looked weak to Alya, that she looked like she had been waiting for Alya to talk to her again.
But the truth was, despite Alya leaving her behind for Lila, despite Alya refusing to talk to her for years, despite everything--she still wanted her back.
Alya had been her best friend for years.
And Marinette missed her.
"I miss you, girl. I want to be friends again."
Marinette smiled as she stood up to hug her friend.
It felt good. Alya always gave the best hugs.
"After the whole Lila problem, you stopped being such a jerk and I saw the Marinette you used to be, girl."
And her heart broke all over again.
Marinette took a fast step back, almost tripping in her haste to get away from Alya.
"What?"
She couldn't believe it.
Even after Lila had been exposed, Alya still believed Marinette was a bully.
Alya just smiled.
"Yeah, girl. I'm glad you're back to being nice."
Marinette could barely contain her anger. She clenched her fists, her sharp nails almost drawing blood.
"Why?" She spit out.
Alya raised her eyebrows, looking confused. She gave a short, awkward laugh.
Marinette stood, slamming her hands on the desk.
"Why?"
Alya took a step back, eyes widening comically.
Marinette didn't care. She was fucking sick of Alya pushing her around.
"I--"
Alya started, but Marinette cut her off.
"Is it because you want something from me? Pastries? A free commission? Or maybe it's just because you think I'll come crawling back to you the second you demand it? Why now of all times do you ask to be my friend again?"
Marinette's shoulders were shaking, her face was flushed red with anger.
And she wanted to punch a wall.
Alya stood there gaping like a fish out of water.
But the thing was, she didn't look sorry or worried.
She looked confused.
Like she didn't even understand what she did wrong.
And that only served to spurr Marinette on more.
"Oh! Could it be because you needed someone new to leech off of now that Lila was outed? You know I have connections, is that why you're back?" Marinette's tone was sickly sweet, a fake smile plastered on her face.
Everyone was staring at them.
Everyone was staring at her.
Because they all thought she really was a bitch.
And maybe she was. Maybe she was everything Lila said and more. Maybe she was cruel and mean and awful.
And maybe she didn't care.
Maybe Marinette was done with their bullshit.
They were toxic and demanding people who didn't deserve her love.
So why should she give it to them?
"Marinette, you don't need to be so mean." Mylene said, looking concerned.
Marinette snapped her fingers dramatically, a wide grin on her face.
"You're right, Mylene!" She turned back to Alya. "Why did you want to be friends again, Alya?"
Alya seemed to find her dignity--probably back in Italy with Lila. She straightened up and stared at Marinette.
"Well the Winter Dance is coming up and I thought maybe we could hang out and you could make me a dress?"
Marinette sent her a blank stare before she sat back down and busied herself with a few scattered papers.
"Interesting, well if you want a commission, Alya. You should have just said so."
The girl's face brightened.
"Send in a request on my website, the price should be around $400 or more depending on how intricate you want it."
Marinette ignored the indignant gasp from Alya, the outraged yells from Kim and Ivan, the disappointed head shake from Adrien.
But she didn't ignore the amused smirk from Chloé.
"B-but Marinette! You can't charge me for that, we're best friends!" Alya said indignantly.
Marinette gave her a blank stare.
"Really? Because a personal commission takes up a lot of my time. And then there's the matter of who's paying for it. Usually the consumer would pay for the dress itself, and then the service fee, and of course all the fabric would cost a lot. But why, Alya, do you see yourself above all that?"
The class stared expectantly at Alya, waiting for her answer, one they were sure would put Marinette in her place.
"Because we're besties, girl!" Alya looked like she was about to explode, her earlier nervousness turning into anger.
Marinette made a tsking noise, looking away from Alya and putting her stuff back into her bag.
It was clear to everyone but Alya that the conversation was over.
Alya looked ready to fight when Rose pulled her away.
Marinette couldn't care less, she was already thinking of witty conversation starters for her patrol with Noir later.
---
The school day ended with an Akuma in the form of a scorned classmate.
Lady Revenge sat on the Eiffel Tower, clad in a garish orange cape and thigh high blue boots.
Marinette was going to kill Hawkmoth for doing something so awful. But at least she knew Hawkmoth wasn't a fashion designer.
Ladybug crouched a few rooftops away, peaking over the ledge of the building.
"Those boots are ridiculous." Noir whispered, landing as silent as a cat.
Ladybug jumped, startled.
"And that cape? Truly awful." She tried and failed to keep the squeak out of her voice.
"It really does suit her though, a terrible person wearing a terrible outfit." Noir grinned at Ladybug, her canines shining.
Ladybug snorted before a thought hit her.
Did Noir know Alya?
"Do you know what happened?" Ladybug whispered.
"This girl yelled at her--rightfully so--because she wanted a free dress even though they stopped being friends a few years ago. The bitch has no right to be mad."
And that confirmed it.
Noir was in her class.
---
Ladybug took no care with this Akuma.
She had no time to cuddle someone who had no reason to be akumatized.
She slammed her fist into Lady Revenge's face, spinning into a kick to the stomach when the Akuma stumbled. 
Noir came in from the back, launching herself over Lady Revenge's head and sweeping her leg as she landed.
Lady Revenge toppled over, screeching about how unfair everything was.
Ladybug pulled out her Lucky Charm, a bright orange dress--one that looked suspiciously like one of Marinette's designs-- that she used to distract Lady Revenge while Noir broke her Akuma.
The battle had only lasted ten minutes.
With Noir, it felt so easy, so fun to be Ladybug. She felt like Noir was helping to bear the weight rather than bringing her more baggage.
It was so...freeing.
"Ladybug?" Alya gasped out, jumping to her feet and fumbling for her camera.
Ladybug stiffened but turned around all the same. Noir leaned on her staff beside her.
"Can I ask you a few questions? Please?"
Ladybug hated it, but she needed Alya to stop bothering her--and this might be the only way.
"One. One question."
Noir raised an eyebrow at Ladybug, shifting closer--as if to protect her.
The thought made her heart flutter.
"Why don't you call on Rena Rouge anymore?"
That was the question she wanted to ask?
Fine.
So be it.
"Rena Rouge was an incompetent and untrustworthy person who wasn't fit to wield a Miraculous. She is cruel and unjust, I have only ever met one other person as incapable of holding such power and that is the former Chat Noir."
Alya gaped, eyes glossy with unshed tears.
But Ladybug was far from done.
"She was supposed to be the Master of Illusion but was caught in a web of lies--lies that hurt someone she once called a friend. Rena Rouge's judgment was clouded and in turn, her nobility corrupt. I can only blame myself for choosing someone so obviously unfit to wield the Fox Miraculous--or any Miraculous for that matter."
Noir set a hand on Ladybug's shoulder--attempting to calm the shaking.
Ladybug huffed. Alya lowered her phone. Noir looked concerned by the shaking in Ladybug's shoulders.
"Does that answer your question?"
Alya swallowed the lump in her throat, nodding shakily.
"Good. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get going."
She nodded to Noir, who grinned.
Then the two launched into the sky.
---
Marinette flopped onto her bed with a dramatic sigh.
Her mind was racing faster than she could keep up with.
Noir was in her class.
Noir was in her class.
Holy Kwami.
She knew Noir. Noir knew her.
Fucking hell.
She could find out who her partner was.
She could--
"Marinette!" Her maman popped her head through the trapdoor to Marinette's bedroom.
Marinette's head shot up, glancing around for Tikki--who had hid in the little dollhouse Marinette made for her when she heard Sabine.
"Yes, Maman?"
Sabine smiled at her daughter, such a beautiful young girl--one with far too much responsibility for a 17 year old.
"You have a friend here, dear."
Marinette blinked. She didn't have any friends.
Sabine's head disappeared and Chloé's appeared.
"Hi, Marinette."
---
ya girls adding salt
--Lemon
---
Masterlist
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Taglist:
@laulink @kitsunekat9 @nottabot @yuriyuhitsu @sere-here @mep-kittyjustkillme @fangirlingfanatic @terramay07 @diana-luna-13 @corporeal-terrestrial @lady-bee-fechin
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helbertinelli · 3 years
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I don't mean to sound like I'm calling someone out because I'm not, but whenever I hear people defending Trophy Husband Anakin, Human Disaster Anakin, Incompetent Anakin, or Pet Anakin, they say it's just a joke.
On its own, it is a very valid reason, but that begs the question: why is it always Anakin?
Why do we never get jokes about Human Disaster Padmé or Incompetent Padmé (or jokes like thst about other characters)? They say that it's because Padmé hasn't done "human-disastery" things, but she has. Padmé is seen by many as strong-willed and courageous for going straight to helping Obi-Wan on Geonosis, but if Anakin did the same thing, he'd be called reckless. Through this, Padmé is turned into a Flawless Queen for doing the same things that turn Anakin into a Human Disaster.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not as mad as you think. This is just an observation of mine.
Maybe I should make a post about it sometime, hehe
I'm as mad as you think, so thank you for sending the ask.
I can't understand how they'd defend Pet Anakin, even as a joke. I mean Anakin started out as a child slave and then you go from that to making him a pet? Yikes.
Human Disaster and Incompetent Anakin have all been made worse by TCW, I bet. Because TCW made sure to portray him as being always kinda incompetent and basically a fuck up. No one respects him in TCW and Obi-Wan and Ahsoka constantly make fun of him, even when he's right. And there's also fanon!Anakin which basically convinced a good part of the fandom that Anakin is stupid and he doesn't even know the colors or how to read, when, you know, in canon Anakin is one of the most intelligent people in the galaxy.
Now, trophy husband Anakin, this gives me vibes of anti-Anidala and somehow Anidala people latched on to it. But its implications are basically that Padme doesn't love Anakin for anything else other than the fact that she can brag about his looks and she can fuck him. If people understood Anidala and understood that Padme loves Anakin (for way more than his body), they'd know that trophy husband Anakin is a pretty disgusting concept as it relates to their relationship. It also means that Padme is superior to Anakin in the relationship, which is not true and has never been true. And it turns Anakin into an object, which again, just like the Pet Anakin, it's really disturbing when you think about it. You're turning the guy who got out of slavery into an object again. Yikes!
I know some Padme fans get mad if someone even says the words Padme Skywalker or if they say Padme wanted to be Anakin's wife, so this whole trophy husband Anakin thing reminds me a lot of those people. It implies that Padme would have never wanted to be Anakin's wife because she loved him, but she would be his wife if it meant she had a toy basically that she can show off. So he's not her husband because she wants him to act like a husband, he's her husband because she wants to tie himself to her and to show ownership over him. It's extremely fucked up. I can't understand how people (especially those who like Anidala and Trophy Anakin) can excuse this or find this appealing for the relationship of Anakin and Padme.
One reason behind all those "tropes" would be that I've noticed that in many fandoms (and some canons... mainly in comics), it's cool to infantilize men and to make them act extremely submissive and harmless (they're incompetent, they're stupid, they're lost without another person to control their every decision and hold their hand at every step). I personally find it extremely disturbing. Was there no middle ground between men not respecting women and treating them as objects AND men acting like door mats and being treated like objects?
You are right about Padme being just as reckless as Anakin. She also jumps head-first into things and she doesn't even have the powers of the Chosen One or Force sensitivity. At least Anakin has something to back up his recklessness. So in a way, Padme is way more of a disaster than he is. But if you start saying Padme is a human disaster or a trophy wife (hell you can barely say she's a wife at all without some Padme fans going like "Anakin mind tricked her, she was only his wife to spy on him, GL was sexist for making Padme fall in love with Anakin"), or a pet people will get mad because they'll recognize how sexist and dehumanizing and disgusting it is to call someone those things now that they are applied to a woman. But if they're applied to men it's fun apparently.
One of the reasons I like Anidala is because they were extremely equal in so many aspects. Padme was a queen and Anakin was a slave from Tatooine, but she never treated him like he was any less than her. Despite their differences in power (Anakin being the most powerful Jedi and Padme being just a normal human), they were both extremely competent at what they did and they both respected each other's actions. And as a couple, they were both completely in love with the other and happy to be married, not because it meant ownership over the other, but because it brought them even closer together. The ROTS novelization puts it very nicely when it basically says that Anakin and Padme were one in the Force and her heartbeat was Anakin's heartbeat too, and they were so close and so in love that even when they were apart they were still like one entity. It's just so beautiful and it's really sad when people ruin their characters and their relationships with things like incompetent trophy Anakin or Chadme (which is the TCW and fanon version of Padme who hates Anakin and only cares about her job and acts like a macho man who just goes around punching everything).
Also, you should make a post about it. The more the merrier. Tag me in it, I’ll reblog it asap.
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levi-ish · 3 years
Text
Little Talks | 3
Pairing: Bartender!Levi X Reader
Genre: [+18] Slice of life, drama, romance, fluff, smut
Words: 4k
Warnings: Alcohol, cheating mentions, drugs, cussing
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
Masterlist
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You [18:21PM]: idk what to wear, help!!!
Mikasa-tu-casa [18:21PM]: u dont need to go all fancy, its just us.
Sash [18:22PM]: wdym??? Its my bday bitch, fuck yea go all out. i am wearing my best dress.
Annes [18:23PM]: whats the point if ur gonna throw up all over it
Sash [18:23PM]: im gonna be hot, that’s the point.
Mikasa-tu-casa [18:24PM]: where are we going again?
Sash [18:24PM]: that same bar from ur bday, (y/n) suggested it
Annes [18:24PM]: my friend works there
You [18:25PM]: ur friend? Jean?
Annes [18:25PM]: yea, we had chem together last semester. hes rich.
Sash [18:26PM]: ohhh I remember him hes the hot bartender. didnt (y/n) make out w him?
You [18:26PM]: wtf i did not
Mikasa-tu-casa [18:26PM]: he was kinda cute
Sash [18:27PM]: ok im gonna shower
Annes [18:27PM]: aren’t we gonna meet at 9?
Sash [18:28PM]: it takes long to look this good also nic is bringing my present and I wanna look good for him
You [18:29PM]: aww cute
Mikasa-tu-casa [18:29PM]: just finishing up some work then im getting ready
You [18:30PM]: are we meeting in the front or are we carpooling?
Mikasa-tu-casa [18:30PM]: annie said armin was going to pick us up
Annes [18:31PM]: he is
You [18:31PM]: see you there then
You took a last glance at the mirror, adjusting your hair so not one strand would be out of place. Two sprays of perfume on your neck and inside your tan sweater and you were ready, running your hands through your skirt to eliminate any wrinkles as you sat on the sofa and scrolled through your phone as you waited for your friends to pick you up.
It took longer than usual to get dressed tonight; you wanted to look good. After the drunken rendezvous with Jean and Levi, you felt too ashamed to come back to the bar, but something inside you bubbled in warmth when you thought about how those strong arms held your hazy frame, holding you close and breaths mingling together…
A honk from outside took you away from your thoughts and you shook your head, grabbing your keys and leaving the apartment.
You entered the white car and found Annie and Armin on the front seats, saluting you as you hugged Mikasa that was sitting in the back.
“Where’s Sasha?” you asked and Annie looked over her shoulder.
“She said something about her present taking a little longer, but she’s joining us later” you nodded and hugged your body as you watched the outside run by while Armin drove carefully.
The drive to the bar wasn’t long, but every little second seemed to last ages; heart pounding inside your chest and hands slightly shaking as they hugged your body. Armin and Mikasa were making small talk as you kept on thinking about Levi, and how everything changed the second he touched you. He surely was a handsome man, and you liked how he seemed to care even if it was in his own weird way.
As you arrived, Sasha was already waiting in the front and with her arms open to hug you three. Armin gave the girl a small hug and kissed Annie’s cheek before leaving you girls to enjoy your night. It was Friday, so the place was bubbling with people from the inside out, some smoking outside and some were at the door, drinking from their bottles as they talked about stuff and laughed loudly.
You were fading away slowly from the conversation as the girls talked about multiple stuff, you didn’t want to be like that, but your whole head was full of anxiety and thoughts about the short man, hoping to see those grey eyes and enjoy his presence from afar. Maybe you would even have the chance to apologize for giving him trouble.
Sasha led the way and found you guys an empty booth, sitting by your side as Annie and Mikasa sat in front of you, and your eyes kept wandering around, trying to spot him. You saw Jean, mixing drinks without any skill and the other person behind the counter, hair up in a ponytail and talking using a lot of hand gestures. You didn’t remember their name though; it was something like Zoey?
You offered to get their drinks and excused yourself to the counter, walking slowly as you kept looking around for just a sight of the man, unsuccessfully. Jean seemed to be busy so the other bartender found you and introduced themselves as Hange, getting excited over how the night was buzzing. You noticed how they exchanged some looks with the busy man, but didn’t make too much of it, ordering the first round of shots and beer for you and Mikasa — plus some hot wings for Sasha because you knew she would be hungry.
Hange handed you the beers and said they would get the other things ready for you at the table, so you went back to your friends.
“Hey, (y/n)” Sasha snapped her fingers in front of you and let out a small chuckle. “What’s up with you?”
“Huh?” You shook your head slightly, gripping the sleeves of your top in your palms. “Uh, nothing, just looking around.”
“More like looking for someone” Annie observed, keeping her hands in front of her mouth as she talked.
“Ohh, is it the hot bartender?” Sasha leaned on the table, watching your face closely.
“Jean or Levi?” Mikasa asked, letting out a small yawn.
Wait, what?
“How do you know Levi?” you frowned as Annie excused herself to go to the bathroom.
“You mean my cousin, Levi?” she crossed her arms over her chest and gave you a curious look. “The one who owns this place?”
Fuck, what?
Levi owns the bar?
Well, he was always the one to close the place.
Wait, fuck.
He’s Mikasa’s cousin?
That kinda made sense, at some point. He looked like Mikasa to some extent, same cheekbones and the same cold stare. God, now that you learned that new piece of information, things started to fit together more and more.
But the real question was, where is Levi?
“So it’s Levi then” Sasha pointed out, seeping on her beer while Hange came with the shots and placed them on the table with an excited screech.
“What are we celebrating?” They clapped happily, looking between you.
[…]
It started playing some Akon song when you guys downed your fifth shot for the night. Sasha was on her third plate of hot wings, stuffing her face while sauce accumulated on the sides of her mouth. Annie had that blush around her cheeks and was playing with a straw she put on her beer mug, twirling it around her fingers and humming to the rhythm of the music. Mikasa didn’t seem drunk at all to the naked eye, but the way she giggled from time to time was a signal that the alcohol was getting through.
You stopped looking a long time ago, knowing that Levi wasn’t around and wallowing in your misery wouldn’t do you any favors — you just hated that you had dressed at the thought of him being there.
The bar was already emptying, the buzz of conversations dissipating as you gulped the rest of your mug, letting out a satisfied sigh.
“Ah, there is my favorite client” you heard a voice approaching, turning right away to see where it was coming from only to find Jean already folding his black apron. “Ohh, Annie, you’re also here. Haven’t seen you since… chem? Still mad I cheated from you?”
The blonde rolled her eyes and sipped on her beer. “You’re lucky I didn’t snitch.”
“Don’t be like that” he smiled as he scooped closer to you, resting an arm around your shoulders. “Aren’t you gonna introduce me to your other friends, (y/n)?”
“That’s Mikasa and that’s Sasha” you pointed at them and they gave small waves.
“It’s my birthday!” The ponytail girl exclaimed, giving him a small full of sauce. “Put some wings on the house!”
“That’s not how it works” Jean smiled shyly, turning his attention on you. “Unless…”
The girls did the same, all staring between you two in confusion.
“Unless what?!” You frowned, pushing the empty mug forward.
“We can put it on lover boy’s tab. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind” the ash blond man gave you a little jab with his elbow and a shake of brows.
You blushed profusely. What?
“Oh! You mean Mikasa’s cousin?” Sasha put a finger under her chin, looking as if she was thinking hard. “What’s his name again?”
“ARE WE TALKING ABOUT LEVI?” you heard a scream coming from the counters and all your heads turned at once.
Hange jumped over the wooden surface and rushed to your table, putting both their hands in front of your group.
“I heard… oof” putting a hand to their chest, they exhaled loudly, rubbing a droplet of sweat from their forehead as they scooted closer to Mikasa’s side, earning a confused look from the girl, “I heard we were talking about Levi.”
“Hey! It’s my birthday!” Sasha cleaned her hands with some napkins and pushed the small, stained bowl in front of the new bartender. “What about some wings on the house?”
Everyone gave the girl a quick glance.
“Oh, oh, oh! Jean!” Hange threw their hands in the air. “Is she the girl?”
“Huh?” You frowned, feeling blush creep onto your cheeks as small chills ran over your body.
“Shouldn’t you guys be working?” Annie asked and they shuddered their shoulders at the same moment it was almost comical. “Hm.”
“What do you mean ‘the girl’”? Mikasa played with the rim of her mug, biting her lip as she seemed to try to understand the situation.
“Jean’s been telling me things” the other bartender wiggled their brows at you teasingly.
“What’s even there to tell?” You now shifted in place, feeling annoyed. “God, he’s been a friend to me lately, what else?”
The ash blond licked his teeth and leaned over you, arm grabbing you closer to his body as he pointed at your nose.
“Makes sense, but at the same time, you’re the only girl Levi has been hanging around since he—”
With a hard slap on the mouth, Hange shut Jean before he could say anything else.
“JEAN!” they screeched, looking distressed. “Not your story to tell.”
With that, they stood from the booth and grabbed the boy by the collar of his shirt, giving you girls a big smile.
“We are closing in 20, I’ll bring another round of beer for you.”
“Wait!” Sasha stopped them and stood from the table; eyes desperate as the remaining people hanging around the bar. “What about the wings on the house?!”
Soon, you were finished celebrating, going over gossip and laughing about nostalgic moments you had spent together earlier in life, and cringing over some other memories, like when you hooked up with Reiner once, or how Mikasa used to fawn over Eren to the point she would even do his homework without asking twice.
After the last round, you split the bill and sang a short ‘happy birthday’ to the brunette that was kind of bummed because she didn’t get her so desired hot wings, and then everyone started to call their rides. Mikasa was sharing an uber with Annie since Armin must’ve been sleeping at the time and Sasha called Niccolo, since they still had to celebrate, she said — you had a feeling that he would have to cook another dish for her to compensate for the wings.
“Are you coming?” Mikasa asked you, tugging on her red scarf as she gathered her stuff from the table.
“No, I gotta go through my tab with Jean” you told them as they were standing, clearly flushed from the drinks. “You guys go, I’ll see you back on Sunday for brunch.”
Annie and Mikasa gave you another look to confirm if you were really staying behind and you just nodded with a small smile while Sasha ran to her boyfriend as he entered the bar, almost dropping him to the floor.
You were sure to stay, now feeling more sober since you didn’t drink as much as usual, still not over the hangover from last time — you became too intimate with your toilet.
“Take care” Annie pointed her chin at you, turning to leave.
Now there were only you and the last two bartenders present. Hange was cleaning some things while Jean yawned, looking half-dead as he threw some old peanuts in the trash. You walked there and sat on the small stool, giving them both a short grin.
“You’re still here? Jesus, woman, just go home” Jean snapped and Hange threw a rag at him.
“Don’t talk to her like that” they grabbed the rag from the floor and washed it on the sink before returning to their chores. “(y/n), is it?”
You nodded and they leaned back on the counter, too close to comfort.
“So, tell me. What’s your secret?” They whispered the last part, covering their mouth with the back of their hand as Jean rolled his eyes.
Leaning back from the fixated stare, you gave them an awkward smile, knowing exactly where the conversation would lead once more. The jukebox now played Bennie and The Jets as you tried to think of something to run away from the interrogatory.
“Are you being paid to work or to harass clients?” A familiar voice came from behind you, making you thank whatever god was above.
Hange and Jean rose their eyes and exchanged the same looks from the beginning of the night, making your whole body flush with the sudden heat. You tried to focus on anything else, too scared to turn away and find those grey eyes that you wanted so much to get lost inside; the same skin you once touched and felt under fingertips; the same hair that would tickle those thin eyebrows and complement the intense stare he always had stamped on his face, the—
“It’s 4AM, why are you still here?” He asked, now you felt the presence of his body behind yours and you were trapped. There was nowhere else to run.
Slowly turning on the stool, you licked your lips and rose your eyes, now gazing back at him, trying hard not to focus too much, knowing there was a possibility of a blush sneaking if you ever so slightly let your guard down.
Levi’s figure always surprised you. He had this big and strong aura going for him, even though he was about the same height as you; still, he was nothing short of muscles. The white shirt he was wearing hugged every inch of his skin so nicely it made your eyes wander around, trying to map out each of his muscles. His hair looked kind of wet, as if he had just gotten out of the shower and the slight scent of his cologne lingered around, and you took in every second of it to enjoy.
“Don’t you get tired of getting drunk?” He asked, raising a brow.
You felt a wave of heat running through your veins, but now with anger. Sure, you were buzzed, but not enough to be considered drunk anymore. You drank enough water for the past hours to be almost completely sober.
“I’m not even drunk right now” you snapped, turning back to the counter as the man scoffed behind you.
Jean threw a rag to the sink right in front of you and leaned between his arms, letting out a big yawn. “Ah! Finally done”
“Same here” Hange noted, taking off their apron and folding it, going to the backroom, Jean following right after.
It became deadly silent after the heavy door closed behind the bartenders. You could only hear yours and Levi’s breaths as he walked to the bar, crossing the counter and you did your best to avoid looking too much.
“You are dressed up” the man made a remark and you looked down at your clothes, adjusting your skirt as you sat.
“It was my friend’s birthday” you replied, tilting your head up just so you could be on eye level.
“What made you want to celebrate it in this shithole?” He furrowed his brows, leaning back onto the liquor shelves.
Levi never hid the fact that he didn’t seem to like the place. It made sense before, since you thought he was only an employee, but now that you learned that he owned the bar, things didn’t quite fit in.
“It’s a nice shithole” you said as you crossed your arms over the counter.
He kept his arms crossed for a while; eyes focused on your figure as if he were challenging you. Without any new expression, the man leaned down to the lower cabinets and grabbed an electric kettle, filling it with the sink water as you watched.
“You never told me you owned the place” you licked your lips as he started to heat the water.
Levi’s hands worked in the cabinet once more, grabbing a tea box and putting it right in front of you, and then searched for two porcelain cups that were just a little chipped around the rim, placing them next to each other and a teabag inside.
“You never asked.”
You watched as he grabbed two silver spoons and filled the cups with the now heated water.
“It’s usually something you don’t miss, you know?” Rolling your sweater sleeves up your elbows, you crossed your arms in front of your chest as the man put the small spoon inside a cup, pushing it towards you. “Normally, people would go like ‘hey, I own the place, drinks on the house.”
“You almost always drink for free” he furrowed his brows as he dabbed the teabag inside the cup a few times.
“That’s not the point.”
Hange’s face appeared from the creek of the backdoor, looking at you both who were now alarmed by the sound of the heavy metal.
“Leviiiii, just letting you know we are leaving” they said and the man just flicked his wrist as a goodbye, shooing them.
The man didn’t turn around, and you thanked profusely, because the look Hange were giving you was too creepy for him to see. They held both thumbs up and smiled before leaving.
Now that you were sure that you two were the only ones present in the whole establishment, you could feel your stomach turn inwards, anxiety taking over and nerves flowing through your bloodline. The man in front of you brought the teacup to his lips, sipping slowly and you noticed the way he held it by the rim. Funny.
“Why are we drinking tea?” You asked, looking at the clock only to see it was 4:43AM, and Levi didn’t look like he had any sleep.
He just stared at you through his hand, lowering the cup just a little for him to speak: “Because I felt like drinking tea.”
The commanding tone of his made chills run down your spine. You knew for sure you were blushing now, so you decided to grab the teacup to hide your face behind it, sipping slowly on the minty taste.
“You look nice” he said, taking you by surprise.
Your fingers suddenly felt numb. Fuck. Before you knew it, it was too late, and the cup was now a splatter of pieces on the counter. The liquid now stained your sweater in a wet spot, the hot tea burning the places where it hit your naked skin.
“Fuck” you let out a hiss. “Fuck, fuck, fuck”
Levi put down his own cup and a little panic showed on his face.
“Take the sweater off” he ordered, grabbing a handkerchief from his pocket and putting it under the sink, drenching it in cold water.
“W-What?” You looked up, skin still aching from the burn and now his choice of words added extra heat to your whole body.
“Jesus, you just fucking burned yourself” he said, jumping to the other side of the counter and showing you the handkerchief.
Not the time to think, you sighed as you took your sweater off, placing it on your side, leaving your dark bra exposed.
You tried covering yourself, knowing the situation was awkward enough already for you to care too much about it. You are an adult, he’s an adult, stop acting like a horny teenager, you thought to yourself as he offered you one of his hands.
Staring for a little longer, he let out a ‘tch’ and rolled his eyes. “Give me your hand.”
You followed his command and slid your fingers into his palm, feeling the warmth envelop you, even if the source was from a small part of your body. He held your hand and brought you closer, analyzing the positions before he could start working on your burns.
“Sit on the counter” he ordered again and once more, you followed.
Adjusting yourself on the cold surface, you gave your arm to him and felt his fingers slide along your skin, warm fingertips touching where the droplets of boiling water hit before, and a little flinch escaped from you whenever he found a new spot. He looked up, as if to see if everything was alright and you gave him a small smile, shaking your head.
“It’s not that bad” you affirmed and he furrowed his brows, lowering his gaze once more.
“That’s because of the alcohol” the man started dabbing the cold fabric carefully, watching every little movement of yours as he did. “Tomorrow, this thing is gonna hurt like a bitch.”
You chuckled at his remark as he held your hand closer to his chest, putting it above your knees in a position where it wouldn’t hurt to stay still. You took a moment to admire his marked features, watching every little move of his and wondering about those eyes, glad that they were focused on you.
Although Levi held this harsh front, he really seemed to care behind those big walls, and that was enough for you to fall.
“Sorry about your cup” you apologized, almost in a mutter, feeling shame crawl under your skin once more.
“It’s a stupid cup” he said, still working on your skin. “I can just get another one.”
“Still, let me pay for it” pursing your lips, you felt his grip on your wrist tighten just a little.
“That’s dumb.”
You sighed, “I keep giving you trouble, I want to make it up for you.”
He stopped the dabbing, looking up to find your piercing gaze already on his. Eyes shining under the dim lighting and silent surrounding you two.
“You’re not paying for the fucking cup” he rose his brow, staring deep into your soul, and now you were scared that he would learn all your secrets.
“I’m serious, Levi” you persisted. “I didn’t even thank you for taking me home the other day.”
“It’s fine” he stuck to his argument, but you also did the same to yours.
“No, it’s not. Must’ve been really annoying.”
“You were annoying, indeed” he let out and you playfully rolled your eyes.
“Sure… but thank you, for… you know—taking me back to my apartment.”
You remember waking up the next morning to a box of Advil sitting on your bedside table, next to a big bottle of water and how warm your chest felt to feel like someone was caringly enough to do that for you. Even for someone who you’d recently just met.
“Stop with this sappy shit and let me work” he rolled his eyes and went back to dabbing the wet cloth on your skin, “you’re gonna get nasty scars if I don’t take care of them.”
Smiling to yourself, you straightened your arm again allowing him the full access to your skin and the man went back to his previous actions. The dawn was beginning to clear and sneak between the blinds, filling the whole place with clarity, and none of you felt tired, engulfing in each other’s company.
TAGLIST 
@zeickv @thirstyforsometea​
152 notes · View notes
wickedpact · 2 years
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A ranking of all the TTT stories in order of how much I liked them.
(Oh god this is so long)
1 My Mother's Axe
BABY ANDYYYYYYYYYYYY. Honestly this one had the trifecta of developing a character's motivations, developing a character's backstory, & developing their personality. The story starting out with Andy teaching Nile to use the axe was so charming and fun, and you could feel that chemistry they had in Opening Fire, the way they teased and bickered with each other so naturally. I loved the wedge between them on the subject of the axe, how Nile was perhaps a little too young to understand Andy's feelings about whether or not its the 'same' axe. I also love how the axe is obviously the symbol of the franchise and hugely important, but you never get a sense of exactly how important it is to Andy until you read the story.
I love the entire Ship of Theseus theme, and how it feels so natural that for Andy she has to get attached to the idea of things rather than the things themselves because she'll always outlive the things themselves-- the axe is symbolically her mom's axe, even if physically it isn't. And I love how she clearly clings to that concept so tightly. "This is the labrys she held in her hands...." IT GETS ME.
And the fact that this sense of BELONGING, of FAMILY, of CULTURE is so important to Andy that she clings to it (figuratively and literally) with both hands. And of course it's important to her, she spent so long alone that the woman doesn't even remember her birth name. That axe (or the idea of that axe) is all she has left of her mother and that family/culture she was born into.
PLUS on that note I love how Andy doesn't remember if her mom was her actual biological mother, but it doesn't matter to her. This woman was her mother in all the ways that counted. And how her mom BETRAYED AND KILLED Andy but Andy loved her so much that she avenged her and carried her axe for thousands of years. THOUSANDS OF YEARS!!!!!!
I also loved how the story transcends the timeline of the whole franchise and seeing Andy through the years. Loved seeing her with the varying squads and with varying axes. Also baby Andy was so cute. It was cool seeing her so young. like holy fuck. Andromache The Scythian, Immortal Warrior (but smol). Love that.
Also I think this one is one of the few ttt stories that doesn't suffer from length problems.
tldr: goddammit greg you've done it again.
2 Zanzibar and Other Harbors
Zanzibar my beloved. I've said before, but it's downright comedic how little regard there was for Joe and Nicky's character designs in this story. The same person who does the colors for the regular comic did the colors for this one too, and you can tell, every panel of this story was Beautiful.
Ik there was A Lot of criticism of this one (lmao @ how the fandom had no idea what was to come) but I thought a lot of The Discourse was a bit dramatic. I did think Nicky came off as a little oblivious to Joe's feelings in this story, but I've said before, I honestly think that was a 'tone not translating' thing. It felt like Nicky was nagging Joe for [checks notes] saving innocent people, but Joe was so amused by Nicky's complaints I really do think it was supposed to come off as teasing.
Plus I know the 'Joe running off into danger and Nicky reluctantly following' dynamic wasn't popular (I'm a pretty meh on it meself) but I did love how Joe's impulsiveness (if you want to call it that) was interpreted as heroism and not hot-hotheadedness. All of the examples Nicky and Joe talked about included Joe explicitly saving people. (and it also took A Lot for the nazi to actually provoke Joe).
I also feel like their characterization here was closest to the movie canon-- the bit where they hear the woman scream and Joe goes running in to save her while Nicky swoops in on Joe's heels to comfort her while Joe and the nazi were fighting reminds me of the train car scene. Joe had suggested First that they go find Nile because she needed to be protected, and Nicky later added that Nile probably also needed emotional support. Similar reactions.
But it was So Good, the themes of queer community and the enduring nature of queer culture are Not themes you see in media that often and it was such a delight how it was done. Also it's one of the few more modern TTT stories that has a completely valid excuse for taking place when it did. Chef's kiss.
3 Passchendaele
I love the Duality between seeing baby Andy and then seeing Mama Andy in the very next issue. This story doesn't have a ton of meat to it, but the entire concept of Andy adopting a war orphan straight off the battlefield PLUCKS MY TENDER LITTLE HEARTSTRINGS, and I think it's especially poignant for comic!Andy. I think most people wouldn't think twice about movie!Andy doing something like that but comic Andy is so hardened and almost cruel sometimes, and seeing that even for her the world hasn't beaten all of the compassion from her yet is SO!!!!!!! this woman contains MULTITUDES okay, she's violent and angry and tired and Done but she's also so kind and compassionate and THE STRENGTH OF HER!!!!! Also the idea of her and Yitzhak co-raising a kid together is so damn cute. It was #mysterious pre-Yitzhak-story but now it's cute. holy fuck. It's cute.
& the headbonk panel of her and Zeus lives in my heart. anyways.
4 Many Happy Returns
I Know people weren't thrilled about Booker being in this one, but I've developed a pet-peeve about that: this story was *not* booker-centric. Booker only exists in this story to the extent required to explain the importance of the gesture Nile makes towards him. If there was a story about Booker making some grand gesture of kindness to Nile no one would be saying it was Nile-centric. bc it wouldn't be! Booker exists in this story to explore Nile's kindness, its not about him. I saw that a couple times and it bothered me. anyways.
AAAAAAAAAA I loved this one, the art was beautiful, I loved how Andy Nile and Booker were drawn (like their comic selves but.. more looking like actual people). I loved Andy and Nile's Bants, how Andy wanted to jump right in and Do Violence but Nile was basically telling her to hold her horses.
I feel like I'm just repeating the post I made on this story a few days ago, but I LOVED how Nile's plan revolves not around violence or Cool Mercenary Skills but on Nile's own life skills (as she canonly did a lot of minimum wage job-hopping before the marines in comics canon). Her plan used her skills, not the skills of an immortal warrior, and HER SKILLS were in fact more useful for the situation! lov to see Nile's resourcefulness and planning skills.
AND HOW NILE WAS PROBABLY WATCHING BOOKER??? it's so Much bc 1.) nile knew booker A SINGLE DAY and yet he made such an impression on her emotionally that she had to keep an eye on him and 2.) she said in the movie she wanted Booker to get off free with an apology. Yes she's a member of the team but that doesn't mean she's necessarily going to follow orders like a good little soldier. I also love how she convinced Andy to go along with it. her HEART, her KINDNESS, her THOUGHTFULNESS, UGH.
5 The Bear
Honestly I have like no negative things to say about this one other than a.) character design issues which is less about the story itself and is more of a 'tog comic in general' criticism and b.) too short, but it was supposed to be a tease, so.
But I loved Yitzhak, I wasn't expecting to really like him at all but like I said in my other post, he tickled me. I love characters who are Kind™, especially if they have little reason to be so given their backgrounds. Chef's kiss. Lov him.
6 Bonsai Shokunin
I know this one was a little controversial bc of the outsider POV but whenever I see people upset about that they never point out that the Outsider Guy (the samurai) existed as a reflection on Noriko. His ideas are explained in the text to develop hers. The whole story follows how she gave mercy to a scared young man and in response he murdered Noriko, repeatedly! Who gave him the right to inflict such pain and suffering on the world? In his opinion, the lack of response from the gods was his permission. And for Noriko-- over and over again she dies and suffers because she gave mercy, which lines up with her ideas in FM about how it's their fate to rule mortals and if they don't align with that plan/fate/whatever then they suffer. It shows some background to those ideas and how they developed in her mind outside of Ocean Madness™. Additionally, his idea of 'the Gods have done nothing to strike me down so it's fine if I do these things' kind of explains how Noriko may justify her own morally corrupt actions-- she's died so many times and it's never stuck. Maybe if she did die any of those times, or while she was in the water, maybe that would've been a sign she was doing something right, or at least doing something normal. But she hasn't died. Fate isn't done with Noriko yet. And maybe there's a reason for that. In her mind, it's just not a very pleasant reason, is all.
There were things I was kind of meh about tho. I did kind of wish we saw something of Noriko and the team, or smth explaining the way she was before her dip in the pool-- personality, likes dislikes, etc. but it wasn't bad or anything. It was super vague tho, I had to read it a few times before I got what it was going for. Liked the art. Liked the bonsai metaphor. And of course I Respect the decision to use the 1300s (1200s? I don't remember off the top of my head) rather than using the last 200 years.
7 Strong Medicine
Honestly looking back, this one made me kind of sad because both this one and Bonsai Shokunin explored character's ideas on Fate and The Divine and how that intersects with immortality and I totally thought that theme would be continued, especially with Love Letters. But Then It Wasn't™.
Admittedly.... I had to re-read this one to remember most of it. I liked Booker's ideas on God, 'The conductor of the symphony just may not be very good at his trade' but the plot itself was kind of forgettable. Some fuckin cowboys try to kill a doctor (their second) because he couldn't save their sickly brother. Book tries to stop them, gets killed, and then comes back and kills them all before they get the doctor. Alright. I liked the artstyle because the characters were ugly in a similar way that leandro's are, but way more bearable.
I love the Irony of Booker concluding that there is no such thing as fate or destiny and nothing has meaning, AS HE UNKNOWINGLY SAVES MERRICK'S GRANDFATHER FROM BEING KILLED. Booker getting fucked over by life/god/destiny yet again. It also kind of explains about where the fuck hell Merrick's interest in immortal mercenaries even came from.
I originally had this one a lot higher and then I thought about it and moved it down like two spots.
8 Never Gets Old
I liked seeing Booker interact with his kid. And we got a name for the kid! Philippe was a little bitch though, he was a little obnoxious. I liked how Booker was so thrilled to experience a restaurant with his kid (and since we know he was there before, it can be assumed he went with all of his kids and yet he was so charmed each time). It fits with his line to Nicky in the moon landing story about how you don't appreciate beautiful things 'unless you have someone to share them with'. It was charming to see Booker interact with his kid, and to see him so happy. Also lmao @ Booker's big fat Ye Olde Crush on Andy.
However at the same time it was like.. of all the things to write about,,, I guess? Booker's Night Out...... alright. Especially since Book had so many stories.
I don't know, it was alright. The old man killing him really came out of nowhere, (but the 'Salut, asshole!' panel was funny tho).
9 How To Make a Ghost Town
I've hit a point where talking about these stories has gotten less fun. I liked this one but I felt like Achilles getting lynched was not really necessary for a story that was already tragic (a story that already involved Achilles doing a lot of suffering at the hand of bigots). When we first got the blurb for this story I thought it would be about Andy returning to the squad and making friends with Booker after losing Achilles and them butting heads on the idea of family and when to cut off ties. So a little bit of my underwhelmedness about this one might be just my expectations being different.
Honestly I was pretty interested in Andy and Achilles' relationship and I would've liked to see more of them-- like, what was their dynamic like? What did they love about each other?
But anyways Andy leaving and Achilles getting killed anyways feels so pointlessly tragic (which I suppose is the point..... I don't like tragedies) she left to save him and yet people killed him anyway. Meh.
I did love the bits about Andy wanting to have a domestic life (Andy and her multitudes again) and the little detail about how she buried her axe near the road but he buried his guns under his bed-- he was an escaped slave, he never had the luxury of assuredness like Andy did. It was a sad story.
10 Lacus Solitudinis
'You put this one above love letters crim??? how could you???' easy, lmao.
There was stuff in this one I liked. But to talk about stuff I didn't like: (I'll keep it brief, I know ragging on this story has been done time and time again)
UH, setting aside the 6 year cold shoulder between Joe and Nicky, I thought their chosen method of conflict resolution was... bad at best. Nicky's inability to talk about his feelings was also annoying, especially since the entire point of this story is a fight Joe and Nicky had, and yet we don't get both sides to the story, which is...... important? That fact is especially annoying bc in the absence of Nicky explaining his side of the story, it's absolutely a possible (and admittedly probably unintentional) interpretation of the text that we do get that Joe routinely resolves conflict between him and Nicky by simply cutting Nicky out of his life entirely until Nicky just. caves? Even if it takes years?
WHICH i could get into that interpretation and how fucked up i find it. but im not going to. out of restraint.
I don't know, I think there are a lot of interesting ways to go about this conflict but 'Nicky wants to kill a guy and Joe refuses to acknowledge his existence until he stops because he thinks Nicky is too much of a Good Boy to get his hands dirty like that' ('I wont watch as the world turns his (...) compassion into something ugly'. ) wasn't.. how I would've done it. (I mean you know Joe doesn't give a shit about what Nicky is doing in a moral way, because Joe doesn't even care or mention that Booker is killing those cops too. Joe only cares because he doesn't like the idea of Nicky changing in a way he finds undesirable.)
admittedly I've said before, I do like the emphasis Joe's reaction puts on Nicky's kindness. Joe has a complete inability to cope with Nicky simply Not Being Kind. It speaks to the steadiness of Nicky's compassion all those years. but still that fact doesn't make it the conflict feel worth it
hm. I said I would be brief and I wasn't.
oh well. basically I thought there was interesting conflict potential there but it wasn't done the way I would've liked, and the way it was done leaves a lot of disturbing (and again probably unintended) interpretations to lie.
What I did like? Andy and Joe having that pessimist/optimist dynamic. Joe nerding out about science. Andy not being impressed by The Achievements Of Man. I loved Booker needling at Nicky about his outdated slang and also trying to give him Older Brother advice practically in the same breath. I loved Booker giving The Worst relationship advice ever and Nicky being like 'I Will Not Do That, Ever, Thanks.' the family vibes were so good. The Joenicky vibes left a lot to be desired tho.
11 Love Letters
I talked about my problems with Nicky in this story (and Lacus Solitudinis). I don't know, the story isn't bad but I do hold a little bit of a grudge towards it because its very existence begs the existence of a solo Joe story and we didn't get one. If we never got this story, then we could happily count Lacus Solitudinis and Zanzibar as The Joenicky Stories™ and move on with our lives. sigh.
I remember when we first got the blurb for this story I was really curious about why Nicky specifically + the setting, and the answer kind of feels like 'the author had an idea for a story like this and saw ttt as a good enough place to utilize that idea'. Plus I was really underwhelmed by the Romantic Sentiment in the letter. If you look at it line-by-line, the majority of the letter is actually Nicky talking about how lonely and disturbed he is, rather than actual,, yknow,,, Romantic Sentiment. I mean, compare the van speech and this letter and this letter is just kind of meh in comparison. I liked nicky calling joe wise! and I liked the brief sun/moon metaphor! and otherwise it was eh. It didn't even have cute squad banter, which is why Lacus Solitudinis is above this one.
12 An Old Soul
Nun orgy. Nun orgy?????? Nun orgy.......
The whole story felt like a setup to have a nun orgy. Why did Booker have abs? Why did they do that to Andy's nose? ?????? the art was good at least.
nun orgy.
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thetimelordbatgirl · 2 years
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I liked Endgame at first but as time went on I realized how not good the movie was. But even while walking out of the theatre genuinely moved I remember even then not wanting additional MCU movies because the series felt complete. I was worried that trying to add onto it would turn the MCU into a mess and sadly I was right. Honestly, I think phase 4 made Endgame worse - either but exacerbating the problems from that movie or retconning/rendering pointless many of the movie's good aspects.
Phase Four definitely reads as desperation to continue the MCU, honestly. Cause phase one and phase two built up to Endgame, aka end of Phase Three....well, kinda....Far From Home is somehow in Phase Three, but you get what I mean. But like, mentioning Far From Home....its definitely where problems start to show. Keep in mind, I am not a fan of MCU!Tony Stark- I'm more of a animated adaptions fan at this rate- but like, he died in Endgame stopping Thanos.....only for Far From Home to ruin any legacy he could have left with, "Actually, here's another villain he caused and him leaving a weapon of mass destruction to a child and said weapon can hack into everything-" And then of course, we got the whole, "Is the multiverse real?", cause Mysterio was said to be pulling it out of his ass and therefore, this makes No Way Home jumping straight to Multiverse kinda fucking jarring. And of course, as its the end of Phase Three instead of Endgame, Far From Home ends with a cliffhanger.....so we in hell still.
By not ending at Endgame though, what can they do? They basically concluded almost everything Phase one-three set up......so they basically pull whatever they can to excuse keeping the MCU going. Multiverse? An ongoing plot still as of Multiverse of Madness. Spiderman's ongoing problems? Rushed his third film to add it to Multiverse stuff and basically threw aside that Far From Home thing pretty much in favor off MCU's bootleg Into The Spiderverse. Eternals??? Don't....DON'T get me started on them. They introduced too late into the MCU, so their existence brings questions on WHERE WERE THEY during the entire MCU so far, and they also retconned the whole Celestials thing, so guess Ego didn't look hard enough! Black Widow??? Also VERYYYY late, like, was 2012 really a bad time for a Black Widow film???? Or even phase two at best??? Or before Endgame at least??? Cause it literally came out after she died in Endgame, so what happens??? Yelena gets introduced as replacement, but also leads us to.... Dark Avengers? I mean, so far they got John Walker and Yelena, so....but find it hard to believe, given in comics it was Norman Osborn involved in it.... Young Avengers? Basically already setting it up, since Billy and Tommy were in Wandavision and may return in Multiverse of Madness if the leaks are true, Miss America is also in Multiverse of Madness, Eli Bradley is in Falcon And The Winter Soldier, Cassie has been in MCU since Ant Man and Kid Loki was in Loki....though gotta grab him from the void likely, plus you got Miss Marvel coming out and Iron Heart is confirmed to be in Black Panther: Wakanda Forever.....only missing a few members, but MCU will find them hard to set up unless they prepared to retcon shit....which, lets be real, they are.
Only good part of Phase Four so far has been Shang Chi really, everything else falls to we didn't need it but meh to why?. And its still ongoing. Like, we not even mentioning them about to ruin the Fox X-men and Fantastic Four, just to introduce whatever the fuck the MCU X-Men.....oh, I'm sorry, The Mutants, if they are actually going to call the film that.....will be. I ain't even a F4 fan and I dread MCU takes, especially with Doctor Doom. Like, the fact that they couldn't just end at Endgame....and now we stuck with ruined characterization with Wanda, Sam getting the shield is now being disrespected due to marvels sudden love for Captain Carter from What If...?, Spiderman's life got thrown to shit just because multiverse needs, the Eternals bullshit, the Loki bullshit, the What If...? bullshit, Black Widow's film coming out too late....like, was just making a whole new universe of films that hard??? Was it really???
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jenomark · 3 years
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DECEMBER
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➔Pairing: Doyoung x Reader (Female) | Jaehyun x Reader (Female) ➔Other Members/ Characters: -.- ➔Genre: Plot (ft. smut, romance, angst, fluff etc.) ➔Warnings: Vaginal penetration, cheating, angst etc. ➔Word count: 3,317
➔Summary: You are dating handsome and lovable Jaehyun. You stay at his apartment all of the time, along with his roommate Doyoung. Doyoung has feelings for you, which he doesn’t quite understand. What begins as an innocent crush changes the lives of all three people over the course of seven months.
AUGUST SEPTEMBER OCTOBER NOVEMBER
-Sorry it’s so late!! January & February will be up sometime soon! 💚
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  The very first time you had crossed over that threshold, it was to embrace Jaehyun. With your first date jitters, you nearly collapsed into his arms, tripping over your own feet in his doorway. Luckily, he found the idea of you quite charming, even if he had to stop you from breaking your nose on the first date.
  Your old work friend had set you and Jaehyun up on a blind date. You almost didn’t show up, using every excuse under the sun as to why you couldn’t go. Truthfully, you weren’t ready to be in a working relationship with anyone, especially not a blind date. Upon seeing him and letting him, quite literally, sweep you off of your feet, you were happy you went through with it.
  Your first impression of Jaehyun was that he was drop dead gorgeous. You could hardly speak eloquently around him, but that didn’t matter, because you liked the way he led the conversation. He wasn’t perfect, but he made up for the things you lacked. He was a little clumsy, just like you, which gave you a breath of relief. You were almost too happy when he accidently knocked his beer glass off of the table with a switch of his elbow, his pretty face flush with the embarrassment that seemed to follow you all your life. He made you feel you were not alone, which might have been the very reason you held onto him. He was everything you needed at the time: a fun, beautiful distraction. 
 Though you were no longer friends with the people who set you up, you decided to keep Jaehyun as yours. His job was stable, the sex was great, and he was someone you felt you could pass the time with. Though the relationship itself lacked a lot, it felt like the right thing to jump headfirst into. You weren’t expecting much, honestly. Liking the feeling of falling for someone was enough for you, and you hoped it would be enough for him.
  You definitely weren’t expecting to grow so attached to crossing the same threshold time and time again. You spent more time with him than you had with any of your exes from past relationships. You were having sex with Jaehyun on a daily basis, staying the next morning's at his apartment, digging through his snack cabinets and avoiding his hermit-like roommate. You were someone’s girlfriend. You liked the way it felt having a place to come back to when you were feeling lost, to watch movies in, and to take a shower using all the hot water. It felt a little bit like coming home, which made you realize how much you had been craving closeness with someone.
  It only took you a few months to realize that the person you had been coming home to wasn’t exactly Jaehyun. It might have been clear from early on that Jaehyun wasn’t as right of a fit for you as you had originally thought, that you both stuck together because it was easier, and the sex was enough to entertain the idea of more. They say ignorance is bliss, after all. You both got something out of the relationship, so it was much harder to break-up for good. So, you kept it going, and because you kept it going, you started falling in love with someone else.
 The truth was always much harder spoken than not.
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 You couldn’t stop finding the humor in everything. Doyoung set you down after kicking in his bedroom door, his eyes searching your face for acceptance. The sound of the door opening and hitting the opposite wall replayed in your mind, the clumsiness of the situation warming your heart. You could hear it echo a thousand times, each time seeming more comical than the last. You cupped your hand to your face, tilted your head back and let yourself laugh until you were hot in the face and near tears. 
“What is funny?” he asked, though he was on the brink of laughter, too.
“I don’t even know.” you said. “I just have this uncontrollable need to laugh. I’m really nervous. I think I love you.” 
 You laughed loudly, nearly bending over because your stomach hurt so much. When you felt a stab in your side, you pressed your hand to it and unfolded your body until you were standing straight. You tried keeping your face stoic, but you were failing miserably. Doyoung was staring at you, not completely sure what planet you were from.
“Let’s just fucking do this.” you said.
 You crossed the gap between you, letting your body knock into his, and you kissed him. You were still giggling a little, but as Doyoung’s kisses turned more serious, you swallowed it. You grabbed the back of his neck and felt the edges of his rain soaked hair tickle your fingers.  The passion struck you both again, coming full-force like it had never left. 
  You started rubbing the front of his pants, hoping to rouse him. Doyoung took your hand and clasped it with his, bringing it away. You wanted to feel his bare skin on yours, so you tried removing his shirt, but Doyoung grabbed your other hand and brought it away. You stood holding hands and kissing, Doyoung leading you.
“Let me touch you. “ you said, trying to pull away from his grip.
  When you yanked your hands away, there was no trace of laughter on your lips anymore. You felt like you were staring into his soul when you looked into his eyes. You stood facing him, your decisions hanging between you, weightless and certain. 
   Doyoung stood still as you placed your fingers against his chest. You moved them underneath his shirt, his skin warm to the touch. You felt him, as if he were going to disappear after a few minutes, the spell having been broken. When you were finished, Doyoung’s hand was waiting for you. You placed your hand inside of his and let him hold it. You led him to his own bed, sitting down on it and stretching your body across it. 
 The light in the room was dim and romantic. Though things started off with a bang, you and Doyoung were moving slowly. You made out with him, with his body on top of yours, and your hands scratching up his back. You couldn’t stop getting excited whenever you touched a new part of him. All of the sensations were firing off signals in your brain at once, the serotonin making you come alive. All of the memories of your lives together were replaying over and over again. There weren't  any thoughts spared for Jaehyun. It was just you and Doyoung, building up to the layers of clothes between you. 
  Doyoung pulled his shirt over his head. From there, it felt like time had unfrozen. At last, you were together. You were intentionally in his bed, your fingers feeling for his belt buckle, and his hand making a home against your hip. He was looking at you, his eyes not shying away from yours. His lips were on your neck, his lower body pressing against yours. You opened your legs and invited him inside.
 “I love you.” Doyoung whispered before putting his lips to your lower belly.
 He lifted your shirt over your head. He stripped you naked, stopped only to look down at your body in all its glory. You wished you could get inside of his head to find out what he was thinking, to see if you were everything he wanted. Kicking off his pants, Doyoung knelt down on top of you and pushed the hair from your face. You could feel the old laughter wanting to tear itself up your throat, and you accepted it as happiness wanting to bubble out.
“I love you.” Doyoung said. “And it’s madness.”
 He slipped inside of you. Doyoung was gentle with your body, moving slow, and holding your head to make sure he didn’t hurt you. You wanted him all over you, but you loved the way it felt to be wrapped up in his arms safely, not knowing what type of future you’d both have from that moment forward. You felt like you were free falling.
 You couldn’t catch your breath. Feeling Doyoung fill you up was overwhelming. You wrapped your legs around him to bring him closer. You bit down on his ear for a second before releasing it from your teeth and moaning loudly. You let him tease your body with his tongue before moving inside of you again, the Doyoung of the past being laid to rest inside of his sheets. 
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   You had never cheated on anyone before. You didn’t know it was possible for you to be with someone and entertain the idea of someone else. You weren’t that kind of girl, or, you weren’t that kind of girl, in the beginning. 
  When you first met Doyoung, he mostly kept to himself. Hooking up with Jaehyun meant sneaking around when Doyoung wasn’t home. You think the excitement of it all was the foundation of your budding relationship with Jaehyun. It was all simply too fun to give up. When Doyoung was home, he hardly came out of his bedroom the first few weeks. You thought it was his idea of being independent or keeping a low profile, or maybe it was a respect thing, but you’d never met a man that was so conspicuous. Whenever Doyoung moved, your eyes followed, like you knew he wanted them to. It became a bit of a game to meet him when you stepped out of Jaehyun’s bedroom, to see how far he would go to not look at you. And even though you were sure he hated your guts for interrupting his perfect existence, you couldn’t stop yourself from the obsession of getting him to like you, to talk to you, ot to want to be around you.
 The first time Jaehyun tried breaking up with you, when you had talked to Doyoung in the kitchen and you had linked your pinky with his, was the very first time you had really felt anything for another person that extended past “Fun”. Most of your relationships were just full of ideas of what you and the other person could be, how good they appeared on paper,  and what was worth keeping and what was worth throwing away. With Doyoung, he had laid everything out on the table in a way that made you feel seen. After awhile, you realized that you didn’t care that much about Jaehyun breaking up with you, but you were more worried about losing Doyoung.
 It was wrong. You knew it was wrong in every way your brain tried to spin it around. You had fantasies about fate, little red strings tying your fingers to his. You were falling in love with what was meant to be, and what means you would go to in order to find the truest form of that love. You thought of many excuses that felt like bad writing in the movies. If it was so wrong, why did it feel so right? Why would life choose to throw him into the mix without it meaning anything? All of those things spun around and around in your mind until you started to believe them, and gradually, until they were all too powerful to ignore.
  It was wrong. It is wrong. It will always be wrong. Jaehyun might not have been a storybook perfect love, but he was human, and he treated you better than people thought. And yet, kissing Doyoung couldn’t help you remember what was morally correct, or what kind of situation you were really in. You made the choice to kiss him. You could have made the choice to stop, but you knew you never would. December would come and go, the sex being even better than you imagined, and January would knock you on your ass.
    In the back of your mind, as you tried to grapple with your decisions, all you could hear was the bang of Doyoung’s door.
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  The mistletoe hung from the doorway, like a scene in a foreign movie. You let Jaehyun pass under it first while you stood back a little, hoping that no one would notice neither of you wanted to be caught underneath it together. You looked up at the green mistletoe, its red ribbon falling apart, and you thought it was a perfect metaphor for your current situation. As you passed under it, Jaehyun’s mother's voice chimed in, her idea of romanticism beginning and ending with her son and his girlfriend of nearly half a year.
“You must kiss!” she said, clapping her hands together. “It’s Christmas! Jaehyun, don’t stop loving your girlfriend because we’re around.”
  Jaehyun’s family never felt like yours. As they all stared at you, you realized how badly you’d always wanted to reach that part of him, the part that made him who he was. They were nice people who treated you kindly, but you were still a stranger that didn’t belong in their family quite yet. You blamed it on Jaehyun’s inability to take your relationship seriously enough to introduce you to his mother sooner, but got rid of those thoughts as soon as you remembered what you had done to him. It was an odd feeling being in such a personal space during a holiday without feeling like your existing relationship was the whole truth.
  Quickly, only to please his mother, Jaehyun took your elbow and pulled you underneath the doorway. He kissed your cheek lightly, his eyes never meeting yours. He let your elbow go and walked further into the kitchen, leaving you behind. The Christmas party continued, his family tearing their eyes from you and going back to whatever they had been doing.
  The weird feeling between you and Jaehyun had been happening for a week or so. It had nothing to do with Doyoung and everything to do with the fights you were both having. Jaehyun said you weren’t appreciative of how hard he was working in his personal life, and you were annoyed he paid attention to you so little that he had no idea you were a part of that life, too. Your days consisted of watching Jaehyun storm off into the night after a fight, you crying alone in his room, and then letting Doyoung rub your back until you fell asleep. Then, the next day would reset and all of the mystery resentment would start again.
  Doyoung, during all of this, was patient. He didn’t push you towards breaking up with Jaehyun for good, even though you felt he had every right to, and even though it’s the course you both knew you wanted to take. He didn’t involve himself in the petty arguments between you and Jaehyun, he just made his presence known in case you needed him. He was supportive for someone who had to watch his roommate and the girl he was in love with give each other brisk kisses some days and shoot daggers at each other the next.
    You leaned against the kitchen counter and waited for Jaehyun to talk to you, to show you that he knew you were there. You thought coming to the party would make you feel better mentally. The Christmas holiday was always your favorite, but you had gotten into an argument in the car on the way over, and the jollyness of the season had been sucked out of your soul.
“I don’t know what we’re doing anymore.” Jaehyun had said in the car, as soon as you pulled up in front of his parents house.
 You watched his fingers grip the steering wheel before you spoke. “If you want to break up with me, just do it.”
  You wanted him to be the one to say it, to break it off because you knew you were too cowardly to do it. Your mind was made up. You wanted Doyoung, but you were dealing with the guilt of adding him to your life and subtracting Jaehyun. You didn’t want Jaehyun or Doyoung to lose their friendship either, so you kept yourself in the misery of waiting for someone else to make the first move. It was a terrible habit to have. 
    Jaehyun shook his head, as if he were shaking out bad thoughts. You could see snow flurries hit the windshield and melt against the heat of the glass. They kept your own thoughts at bay, though they were frantic. There was a time when the image of sitting in front of Jaehyun’s family home at Christmas would have pleased you. Now, it made you feel sick to the stomach, especially when you remembered that Doyoung had nowhere to go for Christmas. You tried not to picture him sitting home at alone, bundled up in his soft blue robe, his lips so pouty and kissable.
    You blinked away the memory of an hour ago from your head and focused on where you stood in the kitchen. There should be no moments but the present. Jaehyun’s dad was kind and offered you a plate of food, which you accepted but didn’t eat. His aunts and cousins tried their best to invite you into their conversations, but you felt like you could never relate to any of them. After going through the motions of trying to enjoy Jaehyun’s family’s Christmas traditions and ignoring the sadness invading your brain, you asked if Jaehyun would take you back home.
“Now?” he asked.
“I don’t feel well.” you lied.
“I want to stay for another hour.” he said, his voice rising. “I haven’t seen my family together in a long time.”
  You put your hand on his arm and tried to portray that you were apologetic, but you just felt desperate. Your eyes were glassy, like you might cry. You didn’t want to guilt him into making a decision, that wasn’t your motive, but you couldn’t help feeling emotional.
Jaehyun sighed. “I’ll get my jacket. I guess I can drive you home and come back.”
  You decided to wait on the front steps alone while he got his jacket, the snow flurries landing in your eyelashes. When Jaehyun came back outside, you could tell that he was thinking of something to say. You could feel what was about to happen, so you braced yourself against the coldness Jaehyun had a habit of releasing when he felt backed into a corner.
“You’re not happy with me.” he said. “And I’m not happy with you.”
  You could feel a little sting in your chest when he said those words out loud, because the truth always hurts. The girl you used to be was clinging hard to the idea that maybe Jaehyun was where you were supposed to be, that maybe he could take those words back. There was no part of you that wanted him, but you couldn’t keep yourself away from the What Ifs. They clouded your mind and often made you feel confused.  
Jaehyun continued, “I don’t want to say things that will hurt your feelings on Christmas, so I will keep it short. We’re not good together. You’re not the person I see myself with in the future. You’re nothing like what I imagined. I don’t even know why I held onto you for this long. It feels...cruel. I think we’re a little too codependent.”
   The tears that fell were both natural to your emotional state and to the cold biting at your cheeks. You listened to him, your eyes not knowing where on his handsome face they should focus. When you spoke up to tell Jaehyun you agreed with him, he cut you off.
“- I cheated on you.” he said. “I cheated on you that night I went to the bar without you.”
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jaxl-road · 4 years
Text
Cat Club
Nikki had only planned on yelling at the dude whose cat got his cat pregnant. He wasn’t expecting him to actually stick around.
Pairings: Nikki/Tommy
Warnings: None
~~~~
As the door clicked shut behind him, Nikki sighed heavily, flicking on the lights to illuminate the derelict house he called home. Walking further into the living room, he tossed a handful of papers onto the coffee table before gently placing the cat carrier in his grip on the ground. Releasing the latch on the carrier, Nikki flopped back onto the couch, pressing his fists into his eyes.
It only took a moment for a solid weight to land on his chest. Moving one hand, Nikki eyed the long-haired tabby staring back at him with one bright blue eye. Huffing, he picked the cat up, lifting her above his head so he could stare blankly up at her.
“You whore,” he deadpanned. “You dumb slut. How did this happen? I raised you better than this.”
The cat blinked at him.
Nikki groaned, “Goddammit, Holly, I can’t stay mad at you,” he grumbled, placing the cat back down onto his chest. Once released, she quickly curled up right beneath his chin, Nikki sputtering as long fur got in his mouth, but relaxing as the cat started purring against him. Stroking his pet softly, Nikki stared at the ceiling and contemplated his situation.
Why the fuck hadn’t he gotten her spayed?
Oh, that’s right, he thought as he turned to glance at the bill on the coffee table. It was because he was broke as fuck, and vets were expensive as hell, and even with a payment plan this single morning appointment was going to fuck up his budget for the next month at least. God, he was not equipped for this.
Suddenly, the cat on his chest perked up, sitting up and looking towards the back door. Turning to follow her gaze, Nikki sat up abruptly, sending the cat jumping away.
“YOU!!” He snarled, eyes locking with the sleek black cat pawing at the sliding glass door that led out into the overgrown box of space that had been called a backyard on craigslist. Lurching from his seat, Nikki stormed over to glare down at the animal, “This is your fault, I just know it,” he muttered. He had seen this cat hanging around before, and had seen it wandering in the yard with Holly a few times. Right on cue, the tabby trotted up to the window, meowing to be let outside.
Narrowing his eyes, he shooed her away, “Oh no, I don’t think so. You are grounded, young lady.” He turned back to the black cat still staring after his baby, eyeing the neon green collar around his neck, “Alright, let’s see who I need to fuck up,” he grumbled, unlocking the door and slipping outside. Kneeling down to try to read the cat’s tag, the cat darted out of his reach. Frowning, Nikki took another step forward, only for the cat to jump away again. Groaning, he threw his arms in the air, “Oh come on!”
In the back of his mind, Nikki knew it was ridiculous to go chasing after a cat that may or may not have gotten his own cat knocked up. But hey, it wasn’t like he had anything else to do today, and he really wanted someone to blame for all this, so fuck it. He was chasing this cat.
Of course, the cat had to lead him up the street, climbing the stupid steep ass hill Nikki lived on. Which was bad enough on its own, until the cat led him over the hill. He sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair as he looked down the street from the top of the incline. It was almost comical the way the two sides of the hill contrasted each other. On Nikki’s side, the houses were in various levels of disrepair, the street cracked and full of potholes, the occasional drug deal taking place nonchalantly outside of the drugstore on the bottom corner. Meanwhile, on the other side, the lawns were bright and well maintained, houses with fresh coats of paint and a fucking park at the bottom with happy families laughing and playing.
Figures his cat would shack up with an upper class feline. He was going to have words with her when he got home.
The upper class feline in question was sitting a few feet away, looking at Nikki lazily as if he was waiting for him. Nikki hated going into this neighborhood- he felt so out of place, with his shaggy black hair, piercings, tattoos, and tattered clothing that was held together with safety pins and spite. Even his fucking shoes were duck taped together. But he was determined, and so he approached the cat again, unsurprised but still annoyed when it once again kept a few feet in front of him.
However, it didn’t take long for the cat to trot into one of the yards, casting one last look at Nikki before darting in through a cat door installed in the front door. Steeling himself, Nikki stalked up to the door and pounded on it without hesitation. Even if he couldn’t shake the cat’s owner down for money, he at least wanted to vent some of his frustration and goddamn it he was going to let this person have it.
In all honesty, he was expecting some middle aged suburbanite who probably worked in a bank or something. So he was admittedly caught off guard when loud footsteps rushed to the door, throwing it open and revealing a kid who couldn’t be older than Nikki was. He was tall and lanky, long, dark brown hair flying wildly around his head, and a few tattoos dotting his arms. Tight leopard print pants left little to the imagination and it looked like he had probably owned that tank top since middle school.
All in all, not at all what Nikki was expecting.
“Hi!” The stranger looked surprised, but still smiled brightly, “Can I help you?”
For a moment, Nikki couldn’t seem to find his words. Then, his eyes drifted over his shoulder, glancing around the cluttered but spacious living room with pictures and posters on the wall and a tv surrounded by video games in the corner until his eyes landed on the creature that had led him here in the first place.
Fury reignited in him, he pointed accusingly past the stranger, “Is that your fucking cat?” he snapped out.
“Uh,” blinking in confusion, the other boy followed his hand to look at the cat in question, “yeah? Why?”
“Because that fucker got my cat pregnant!” Nikki exclaimed.
“What?! No way!” he looked between him and the cat in disbelief.
Narrowing his eyes, Nikki crossed his arms, “Is your cat a dude?”
“Yeah-”
“Is he fixed?”
“No, but-”
“Then guess what! I’m now dealing with a fucking vet bill and a knocked up cat all because your cat is a fucking tramp!”
The other man gasped, looking offended and appalled, “Excuse me?? Catrick Stewart has never done anything wrong in his life!”
Whatever comeback Nikki had planned was lost as he felt a record scratch in his brain. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath through his nose, “I’m sorry,” he spoke slowly, “what did you just say his name is?”
When he opened his eyes, the stranger had a bright blush on his face, but he still crossed his arms and huffed, “It is a strong name fitting for a cat of his level of refinement,” he insisted.
Nikki knew he was gaping, but he didn’t care. This day sucked and this confrontation wasn’t making him feel better like he hoped it would. He felt like the universe was laughing at him.
But then again, he thought to himself, what wasn’t the universe laughing at him?
“Oh my God,” he ran his hands through his hair, laughing with a tinge of hysteria, “I can’t believe I’m going to starve because my cat got knocked up by a fucking pun.”
The stranger frowned, face turning serious, “Wait, what?”
But Nikki ignored him, glaring as he pushed at his chest weakly, “Get your fucking cat fixed, you can obviously afford it,” he spat out. Turning on his heels, he stormed away, ignoring the voice calling after him. He practically ran home.
He didn’t understand it, but it felt like something fragile was cracking in his chest- a helplessness he hadn’t felt in a while. Or maybe, it occurred to him as he shut the door behind him, he had just been ignoring it. Leaning against the door, he slid down until he was sitting on the stained carpet, looking around him at the blank, cracked walls and water-damaged ceilings, the furniture he’d dragged out of alleyways before they could be hauled to a landfill, the crooked cabinet doors in the kitchen that hid a painful emptiness.
It’d been a long time since he felt this alone.
He didn’t even realize he was crying until a taste of salt hit his lips, and by then it was too late to hold it back. He just let the tears fall, because even though he was used to struggling by himself, it never got any easier.
Something soft and warm brushed against his side. Looking down, he saw Holly looking up at him, her one blue eye bright and warm. She crawled up onto his lap, and Nikki couldn't help but wrap his arms around her gently, burying his face in her back and letting his tears soak into the long, soft fur. He held her close, and she stayed with him, purring loudly against him until he felt ready to face the world again.
Sniffling, Nikki lifted his head, smiling shakily as he looked down at his companion.
“We’re gonna be okay, aren’t we, girl?” He whispered. She blinked up at him slowly, and he nodded, hugging her a little closer.
“Yeah. We’re gonna be just fine.
~~~~~~~~
“Mick, you’re a sketchy guy- do you know where I can sell a kidney?”
The smaller man paused, frozen mid-motion in cleaning the bartop, before slowly turning to narrow his eyes at Nikki.
“What are you, a cop? Fuck off.”
Nikki groaned, leaning heavily against the bar, “Mick, I’m serious. I’ve got a fucking vet bill to deal with and I’m still rationing food from when I needed to get my brakes fixed last month.”
Humming nonchalantly as he returned to his task, Mick glanced at Nikki out of the corner of his eye, wearing that expression he got when he wanted to convince you he didn’t care but he actually cared very much, “What happened? Holly get into a street fight or something?”
“Worse,” Nikki huffed, putting his chin in his hand, “she’s pregnant.”
Mick’s eyebrows flew up, “You didn’t get her spayed?”
“Don’t even start, I’m already kicking myself,” The conversation was cut short as a large group entered the bar, Mick and Nikki busying themselves serving drinks and already internally groaning at the rowdy kids that would surely only get more annoying the more they drank. Still, Nikki was on his best behavior- good tips were more important than ever.
By the end of the night, as the two bartenders finished cleaning up and breaking down the bar, Nikki was twelve kinds of tired.
Mick looked at him with sympathy. As much as he tried to be a hardass, he had always had a soft spot for the kid ever since he'd used a blatantly fake id to get a job at the bar nearly two years ago as a 20-year-old, “Hey, why don’t you take the next few Saturday shifts.”
Nikki looked up in surprise, “Really? Are you sure?” Saturdays were one of the busiest nights, and thus one of the heavier tip days.
“Yeah, why not,” Mick nodded, “You need ‘em more than me, and honestly I could use a few quieter weeks. My back has been killing me,” he grumbled.
Smiling sincerely, Nikki gave him a soft punch on the shoulder, “Thanks man, I appreciate it.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever, now go take the fucking garbage out.”
~~~~~~~~
The next morning, Nikki was awoken by a familiar yowling next to his ear. Groaning, he pulled his pillow over his head, “Shut up, Holly, I’m not letting you out.” A weight settled on his back and the yowling got louder. Huffing, he sat up, Holly jumping off him and staring at him judgmentally.
He glared right back, “Hey, you’re the one who got knocked up. This isn’t even a punishment, I just can’t have you out there eating garbage when you’re eating for who-knows-how-many?”
Nikki hated the situation, and the next two months were going to involve a lot of financial gymnastics, and he was already frustrated beyond belief, but none of that changed the fact that he was going to do everything in his power to make sure his cat and her kittens were taken care of. Fuck feeding himself, he was switching her to namebrand cat food as soon as he went to the store.
Maybe she understood, because the yowling stopped, the tabby moving to curl up on Nikki’s lap. As he scratched her ears, she started purring contently. Nikki smirked, “Yeah, I love you too, bitch.”
Finally forcing himself to get up, he stretched his arms over his head as he made his way to the kitchen to get some coffee started and fill Holly’s food dish with fresh wet food. Once they both had their morning fix, Nikki wandered into the living room, dropping down onto the couch, stretching his legs in front of him and sipping his coffee slowly as he thought about his day.
His shift wasn’t until that night, and he really should go grocery shopping. But first he should actually look over that payment plan he’d signed up for at the vet’s office and recalculate his budget. He had a credit card payment coming up too, fuck. Finishing his coffee, he decided he could allow himself one more mug before cranking some tunes and tackling a plan for the next few weeks.
Suddenly, a loud banging noise had Nikki nearly jumping out of his skin. Shooting up, a voice called out.
“Hey! Dude!”
Turning towards the sliding glass door Nikki thought for sure he must be hallucinating. Because there was no other explanation for why he was seeing the lanky stranger he had harassed yesterday grinning and waving enthusiastically at him from outside the door, a familiar black cat pacing around his legs.
“Dude!” He gestured at two heavy looking paper bags he held in his arms, “Hey, let me in! I got something for you!”
Blinking slowly, Nikki waited for the hallucination to end. But when the other man didn’t disappear in dust and smoke, he stood slowly, creeping through the dim room towards the door, his eyes narrowed in suspicion at the sunlit stranger.
“How the fuck did you find out where I live?” He asked through the glass. He wasn’t just going to let this weirdo into his house without figuring out what the hell was going on.
“Oh, Catrick showed me,” he said casually, pointing at the black cat beside him. Grinning, he raised an eyebrow at Nikki, “That’s how you found out where I live, right?”
Nikki flushed. In his surprise and suspicion he had nearly forgotten that he had been the first one to show up unannounced on a stranger’s doorstep. He shook his head, crossing his arms with a huff, “Your fucking cat needs to learn not to give out personal information so easily.”
To his surprise, the man laughed, a bright and sunny sound that made something tighten in Nikki’s chest, but not necessarily in a bad way. “Yeah, he really does, the little shit,” he smiled down at the cat fondly. Turning back to Nikki, he was still smiling, but his voice was gentler, “But seriously, I have some stuff for you,” he nodded towards the bags in his arms, “Think of it as, like, child support!”
Barking out a surprised laugh, Nikki hesitated for one more moment before finally giving in. Shaking his head, he lifted the security bar from behind the door before flipping the latch, sliding the door open and standing back as the black cat darted inside followed by his owner.
Nikki couldn’t help but be a little self-conscious of his living situation, but he shoving the feeling back as the other man set the bags down on the kitchen counter before turning and holding his hand out with a wide smile.
“I’m Tommy by the way! We didn’t exactly exchange pleasantries yesterday,” he teased.
“Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled, taking the offered hand and shaking it firmly, “I’m Nikki.”
“Nice to meet you!” Tommy’s smile was practically blinding. Nikki’s kitchen had never been this bright, even when all the lightbulbs were working. “Anyway,” he continued, “I got you some groceries and stuff. I wasn’t sure if you had any food allergies or anything, so I got a bunch of different stuff, and anything you don’t want I’ll take. Same with cat food, if there’s like, a flavor or something you know she doesn’t like, Catrick eats pretty much anything.”
Nikki’s eyes widened as he looked through the bags. Bread, peanut butter, eggs, milk, apples, frozen vegetables, two bags of dry cat food and probably a dozen cans of wet food. There was more, but Nikki took a step back, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. It was one thing when he had to fight tooth and nail to get something from someone. Being just… given it? Filled him with guilt.
“Dude, you…” he cleared his throat, trying to keep his cool, “This is awesome, but you really don’t have to do this. I know I’m the one who showed up and yelled at you, but I was just blowing off steam, honest. You don’t have to do all this.”
He doesn’t know what he’s expecting, but it’s not for Tommy to shrug nonchalantly, “I know, but I want to. It’s not fair for you to have to deal with a pregnant cat on your own when my cat is half responsible. So seriously, don’t worry about it.”
Normally, Nikki’s pride might prevent him from accepting something like this. But something about Tommy just felt so… sincere. It didn’t feel like charity or pity. Just some weird guy taking responsibility for his wayward cat. Nikki could respect that.
“Well… thanks,” he said, smiling as he gave Tommy a grateful pat on the shoulder.
“No problem,” he beamed. At that moment, Holly wandered into the kitchen, hopping up onto the counter to inspect the bags of food.
“Holly, no!” Nikki slid the bags away from her. The last thing he needed was his cat chewing up the first decent food he’d had in ages.
Tommy gasped excitedly, “Oh, is this the mama-to-be?” he reached out eagerly, but pulled his hand back just as fast when the tabby flattened her ears and hissed at him.
“Hollywood Riot Sixx!” Nikki scolded, putting his hands on his hips, “We do not hiss at the dude giving us bags of free food!”
Watching as the tabby jumped down to run back into the living room, Nikki shook his head with a huff. Turning back to Tommy, he found the other man with a hand over his mouth, clearly muffling laughter.
Nikki immediately narrowed his eyes, “What?”
Unable to hold it back anymore, Tommy burst into giggles, speaking as best he could between his laughter, “You-... her name is ‘Hollywood’? And her middle name is Riot??”
“Excuse me, your cat’s name is ‘Catrick Stewart’!” Nikki exclaimed, “At least her name is actually cool.”
“Catrick Stewart is very cool!” Tommy argued, trying to look serious, but still grinning.
Something about the easy way Tommy joked and laughed was infectious, and Nikki couldn’t help but smile too, “You fucking nerd,” he shook his head, something like fondness coloring his voice.
Perhaps having heard his name, Catrick trotted over and, to Nikki’s surprise, rubbed against his legs happily.
“Aw, he likes you!” Tommy grinned.
“He’s just trying to butter me up after he hooked up with my baby,” but even as he pretended to scowl, Nikki knelt down to scratch the cat under his chin. Glancing back up at Tommy, he impulsively offered, “Hey, do you want a beer or something? It’s the least I can do since you’re helping me out.”
“Uh, it’s like 11am?”
Nikki raised an eyebrow, “That doesn’t answer my question.”
Laughing, Tommy nodded, “Fair point. You know what? Sure. Honestly I could always use a drink.”
“Excellent,” Nikki went to the fridge to pull out two bottles, “I’m a bartender so alcohol is like, the one thing I can offer you.” Passing him his drink, they both moved into the living room where Nikki moved to sit on the couch. Almost immediately, Catrick hopped up onto his lap, rubbing his face against Nikki’s chin, drawing a startled laugh from him as he stroked the cat’s back.
Meanwhile, Tommy was kneeling in the center of the room, hand held out in careful determination towards Holly, who watched him suspiciously. Tilting his head as the tabby finally stepped forward to sniff his hand, he spoke up questioningly, “How’d she lose her eye?”
Shrugging, Nikki scratched the black cat on his lap under his chin, feeling a gentle purr against his legs, “I dunno. It was like that when I found her.”
“Oh, she was a stray?” Nikki nodded, and Tommy asked, “How’d you find her?”
“Um…” Nikki flushed with embarrassment, “Y’know, I just… found her wandering around,” he explained weakly. He couldn’t bring himself to admit that in truth, she had found him; that he had been a homeless teen sleeping in an alleyway and had woken up to a cat licking his hair and then she simply never left.
But Tommy accepted his halfhearted answer, grinning widely when Holly finally allowed him to scratch her ears, “There, see! I’m not so bad,” he cooed at her, “You gotta get used to me, I’m gonna be around for a while.”
Nikki nearly choked on his drink, “Come again?”
Turning to face him, the younger man pulled out the biggest puppy eyes Nikki had ever seen, “You’re going to let me help with her, right? Please let me help- She’s going to have kittens, Nikki! Kittens! Little baby furballs! I can’t miss that! Plus, Catrick deserves a chance to know his children!” He clasped his hands together, literally begging.
Which was hilarious to Nikki, because he had assumed that once the kid got his sense of responsibility and obligation taken care of, he’d be done and gone. But here he was, asking to be allowed to help.
What a weird dude.
Huffing out a laugh of disbelief, Nikki shrugged, “Hey, if it means that much to you, I’m not gonna stop you.”
Tommy cheered, which of course sent Holly jumping away. His disappointment quickly turned to exaggerated offense when she hopped onto the couch, curling next to Nikki and allowing him to pet both cats at once.
“No fair!” Tommy whined.
Nikki only smirked, “Suck it.”
~~~~~~~~~
The next few weeks passed in a blur. Tommy continued to stop by whenever he could, usually bringing little treats or toys for Holly, whose belly was slowly filling out, and restocking Nikki’s groceries every few days. With food taken care of, and working Fridays and Saturdays at the bar, Nikki actually managed to get all his bills paid on time, heaving a sigh or relief when the payments all cleared and his account wasn’t overdrawn.
He felt a little bad that there wasn’t more he could give in return, but Tommy seemed thrilled enough at getting free drinks, plus just being allowed to hang around, so he tried not to worry about it too much.
Weirdly enough, Nikki realized that he and Tommy were actually becoming friends. It didn’t fully hit him until he showed up at the bar during Nikki’s shift. At first he had assumed he was just cashing in on the free drinks he offered, but he insisted on paying, tipping him and Mick generously and hanging around for almost two hours just chatting and joking around. When he finally took off, waving enthusiastically as he did, Mick raised an eyebrow at Nikki.
“Well, you two are certainly getting… friendly.”
“Um, yeah, I guess,” Nikki replied in consideration, “Holly’s warmed up to him, so he can’t be that bad, y’know?”
“Uh-huh.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“What?”
Mick smirked, walking away to refill a guest’s drink, “Nothing at all.”
Nikki huffed, but Mick was always being weird, so he let it slide.
Things got a little more interesting a few days later. Despite Nikki’s house being a complete shithole, that was where he and Tommy mostly hung out, Catrick following him over to curl up with Holly who was still on house arrest. But on this evening, about an hour after Tommy had left, Nikki was listening to music and messing on his phone when he noticed something laying on the floor by the front door. Closer inspection revealed it to be a wallet with a driver’s license in it for one Tommy Lee.
Rolling his eyes at the absent minded boy, Nikki headed out to return the item. Walking to the other side of the hill and knocking on Tommy’s door, he figured it would only take a minute- just return the wallet and then head back home. No big deal.
That plan was thrown off the minute the door was opened by a short young man with blonde hair and bright white pants. For a horrifying moment Nikki was afraid he had knocked on the wrong door.
But before he could backtrack, the other man’s eyes brightened mischievously, “No way,” he drawled with a slow smirk, “You must be Nikki.”
Nikki crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes, “And who the hell are you?”
“Tommy never mentioned me? I’m hurt,” he put a hand over his heart dramatically, but he was still smiling, “I’m Vince, Tommy’s roommate, and the guy who’s been hearing all about you.”
Raising an eyebrow, Nikki’s voice was heavy with suspicion, “Excuse me?”
“Oh yeah,” Vince laughed, leaning against the doorframe, eyes glinting as he spoke, “he hasn’t shut up about you. Nikki this, and Nikki that. Fuck dude, I recognized you immediately just from how often he talks about all the things about you that make him h-”
As he spoke, Tommy suddenly rushed up behind him, frantically slapping one hand over Vince’s mouth while the other wrapped around his waist. Vince made a muffled noise of indignity as Tommy lifted him completely off the ground, the blonde flailing and struggling as Tommy laughed nervously, his face bright red.
“Nikki! Hi! What are you doing here? I hope Vince wasn’t bothering you too much hahaha.”
“Um…” Nikki looked between the two of them, “You left this at my place,” he held out the wallet.
“Oh! Thanks!” Tommy reluctantly set Vince back on the ground so he could take the item back.
“Right. Uh, I’ll see you then-” Nikki took a few steps back, still reeling from the whole situation.
Before he could get far though, Vince finally escaped, freeing himself to call out, “Hey dude! You should stick around a hang out! We were just gonna play some Mario Kart and it gets boring kicking Tommy’s ass all the time.”
Without even thinking, Nikki snorted, “Oh, so you wanted to get your ass kicked instead?”
“Oh, Tommy, I like this guy,” Vince grinned, elbowing the still flushed Tommy in the side. With that, the two roommates ushered Nikki inside.
“I would have invited you over sooner,” Tommy shrugged, “But someone can be a little bitch sometimes, so-” he glared petulantly at the blonde, who merely laughed and flipped him off.
Keeping his word, Nikki did indeed kick Vince’s ass at Mario Kart. The demand for a rematch turned into the three boys breaking out some beers and rifling through their collection for more games that Vince could challenge him to. Tommy was careful to always sit between Nikki and Vince, always ready to smother the smaller boy mid sentence every now and then. Nikki didn’t get it, but apparently the two of them were high school buddies, so maybe it was just some weird inside joke.
“You know, it’s Vince’s fault I never got Catrick fixed,” Tommy complained at one point.
“Oh please, you can’t keep blaming me for that!” Vince shoved his shoulder.
But Tommy continued, “I was going to, honest! But then this fucker started going on about ‘how would you feel if someone chopped your nuts off in your sleep?’ and I just couldn’t do it!”
“Oh my God,” Nikki pinched the bridge of his nose, “Just for that, I’m going to chop your nuts off in your sleep.”
“No!!”
Vince howled with laughter.
When Nikki finally left, pleasantly buzzed and having played video games he didn’t even know existed, Vince waved his fingers at him, “Don’t be a stranger now~.” Tommy blushed next to him and quickly shoved him back into the house. Nikki just shook his head and hiked back to his side of the hill.
Weird dudes.
~~~~~~~~~~
Before either of them knew it, six weeks passed, until one morning Nikki was frantically calling Tommy.
“Dude, I think it’s happening!”
Tommy ran to his house in record time.
One of the gifts Tommy had brought along earlier in the month had been a plush cat bed, which Holly had immediately dragged into one of the empty cupboards under the sink in the kitchen. That was where she was now.
“She was pacing around and meowing like crazy earlier,” Nikki explained, crouching in the corner of the kitchen and looking into the open cupboard anxiously.
“Holy shit, I can’t believe it!” Tommy knelt down beside him. On the counter above them was a bowl of warm water, a towel, and a few old t-shirts. Both of them had looked up everything they could to try to be ready for this day. Now all they had to do was wait.
So they waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Holly shifted around on her bed, and they could see her stomach clenching, but nothing was happening.
Biting his lip, Tommy turned towards Nikki, “Dude…”
Nikki was chewing on his nails as he shook his head, “It’s not supposed to take this long.”
“Maybe it was a false alarm? Maybe she’s not actually in labor yet?” Tommy’s voice was unconvincing even to his own ears.
Standing abruptly, Nikki practically ran to grab his phone, “I’m calling the vet.”
Half an hour later, he was gently loading Holly into her cat carrier and Tommy was volunteering to drive. Nikki gave him directions absently, staring down at the carrier in his lap and whispering soothing words to the cat within it. When they arrived, luckily the office wasn’t particularly busy, so Nikki was able to go in right away, leaving Tommy waiting anxiously in the waiting room. It couldn’t have been more than ten minutes when the other man returned, but to Tommy it felt like ages.
“Hey, is she alright?” He asked as he jumped to his feet.
Nikki was tapping his fingers against his legs rapidly as he answered, “They’re going to try to assist her, and hopefully she won't need surgery or anything, but…” he trailed off with a shrug.
Tommy nodded and tried to smile encouragingly, “Hey, I’m sure she’ll be fine. She’s in good hands now, yeah?”
“Yeah…” Nikki replied softly. Then he turned and walked towards the door, “I need a smoke.”
As he left, Tommy followed after him, figuring he definitely wouldn’t mind a smoke right now either. Standing a few feet away from the building, they both lit up their cigarettes, smoking in silence for a few minutes. Tommy was about halfway through his first cigarette when Nikki was moving on to his second.
Looking at the other man in concern, Tommy spoke softly, “Hey. Are you alright?”
Exhaling shakily, Nikki clenched his eyes shut as he ground out, “No.”
He shoved his cigarettes back into his pocket as he turned to face Tommy, face caught somewhere between frustration and sorrow, “No, I’m not fucking alright, Tommy! That’s-” his voice cracked, and he scrubbed his hands over his face roughly, “That’s my cat. And... and she’s all I’ve got,” he admitted softly, “It’s been just the two of us for so long. She's the only thing that’s kept me from losing my fucking mind through all the endless bullshit! Because even when I had fucking nothing at least I had Holly, y’know? And now…” he dropped his head, hands shaking at his side as he whispered, “I don’t know what I’ll do if something happens to her.”
Part of him was ashamed when he felt tears start dripping down his face, and he half expected Tommy to start laughing at him. But instead, he felt long, lean arms wrap around him, pulling him into a warm, firm chest.
“She’s gonna be fine, dude,” Tommy whispered into his hair, rubbing his back softly even as he tightened his grip on the other man, “And even if something happened… you’re not alone, man. You’re not dealing with this on your own anymore.”
Nikki choked out a sob and then he couldn’t hold back anymore, reaching out to cling desperately to Tommy’s back, allowing himself to be held together by someone else for the first time in a very, very long time.
And Tommy let him, only hesitating for the briefest moment before placing a soft kiss on his wild black hair.
“We’re in this together now, dude. I’m right here with you, no matter what.”
~~~~~~~~~
Forty-five minutes later, when Nikki was called back into the office, he laced his fingers with Tommy’s and tugged him along with him.
~~~~~~~~~
“Vince, help me out here! Nikki keeps shooting down all my name ideas!”
“He wanted to name one of the girls ‘Catricia’!”
“We agreed that you would name the boys and I would name the girls!”
“I have to step in! Think of the children, T-Bone! They’re going to get bullied by all the other cats!”
“Oh my God, you two are worse than middle aged married couples,” Vince laughed, dangling a string with a feather on the end in front of one of the more adventurous kittens, luring it towards him with a wide grin.
Tommy had spent every possible moment of the last two weeks at Nikki’s house with the kittens. The previously empty home now felt full, with Catrick and Hollywood curled up together on a large cat bed with their kittens around them. Holly had given birth to four pitch black kittens, two boys and two girls. It was hard to tell so early, but it looked like three of them would be long hair, with one of the girls being short hair. One of the boys was crawling around Vince to bat clumsily at the colorful toy.
As for the other three…
“Mick, this is ridiculous, it’s like they’re perfectly camouflaged on you!”
The older man barely suppressed a grin. He was wearing all black, as he usually did, and the result was that at certain angles it was difficult to see the three kittens crawling around in his lap, “At least I won't have to worry about using a lint roller or some shit,” he grumbled.
“That’s actually not a bad strategy. I still can’t believe Vince still wears white after living with Catrick for so long.”
“Some of us are dedicated to our style!”
Laughing, the four men hung out for a few more hours, eventually leaving the cats alone to curl up together and rest while they drank and argued about everything from music to cat names. Eventually, Vince had to leave for work, giving Tommy a pat on the back and a wink on his way out, but Nikki was used to his weird shit by now. Mick decided to head out soon after, but before he did, he pulled Nikki aside.
“What are you guys planning on doing with the kittens, anyway?”
Nikki shrugged, “Well, they have to stay with Holly until they’re like, ten weeks old or some shit. After that, I dunno, probably post fliers and try to find some good homes for them.”
Mick nodded quietly. Then, after a long moment of silence, he looked up, “Can I have them?”
Nikki felt his eyebrows shoot up to his hairline, “You want them?”
“Yeah.”
“All of them?”
“Yeah.”
“...Seriously?”
“Yes.”
“...You’re not going to like, use them for a ritual or something are you?”
“Oh for fucks sake,” Mick rolled his eyes.
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” Nikki laughed, holding his hands up in surrender, “It’s just surprising is all. But sure, man. Once they’re old enough they’re all yours. It’s perfect cause then I get to come over and bug you all the time to visit them,” he smirked.
“I knew telling you where I lived was a bad idea,” Mick grumbled, but he still looked pleased.
After he left, Nikki told Tommy about the new development, and the lanky boy threw his arms up in excitement, “Fuck yes! Now we don’t have to give them to strangers! And we can visit them all the time!”
“That’s what I said!” Nikki laughed as Tommy crashed into him in an enthusiastic hug. Ever since the day at the vet, they’d been closer than ever, hugging and goofing off and spending most of their free time together. Nikki didn’t even stress when he got the second vet bill- he knew he wasn’t dealing with it alone.
So maybe he should have been less surprised when Tommy pulled back just enough to kiss him firmly on the lips.
Still, he certainly wasn’t surprised when he found himself kissing back.
When they finally broke to breathe, they both couldn’t help but laugh giddily. “I’ve wanted to do that since the day we met,” Tommy admitted.
“The day I followed your cat to your house and yelled at you?” Nikki raised an eyebrow.
“Hey, it’s not my fault you’re hot when you’re angry.”
“Oh shut up!”
“Make me.”
Nikki kissed him again. And again, and again, and ran his fingers through his hair, and convinced him to spend the night. They laid on the couch tangled in each other's arms, and Nikki didn’t think he’d ever felt less alone then he did in that moment, with the sound of Tommy’s heartbeat under his ear and the occasional patter of little paws in the dark.
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Falcon and the Winter Soldier series commentary.
It’s currently 07.28am on Friday the 19th of March 2021, and the first episode of Falcon and the Winter Soldier is now on Disney+. For WandaVision, I re-watched the series for a review when it ended, but for this one, I’m going to go as I watch them the first time.
This isn’t going to be run-down, or a play-by-play, just any comments I happen to have. I’ll give some context, but this will generally make more sense if you’ve seen the show.
I’ve actually avoided most of the trailers for this show, but it follows Sam Wilson (AKA Falcon, played by Anthony Mackie) and Bucky Barnes (AKA the Winter Soldier, played by Sebastian Stan) after the events of Avengers: Endgame, after the (death?) of Steve Rogers, the original Captain America, who passed the title to Sam.
Let’s get into it.
Episode One: ‘New World Order’ I hate this title, and I’m scared. This episode is 49 minutes long, and I’m expecting the series in total to have roughly the same six-hour runtime of WandaVision, but that’ll be in fewer episodes because WandaVision started in a comedy format, with shorter episodes. Let’s go.
Cue the Marvel intro.
No, no, no, no, no, no. He’s dressing for a funeral. Fuck.
Nope, no funeral. At least not right now.
And he jumps out of a plane with no parachute. Steve Rogers who? I mean, at least he has wings. Steve’s just an idiot. Where’s Bucky?
Okay, this plane break-in is a really fun sequence. Yes, shields, thank you. Sam’s already smarter than Steve. He’s rescuing a Captain Vascant, and I honestly thought he said Captain Croissant. It would make sense. The people on the plane French.
This sequence, flying through a gorge, really reminds me of a game I used to play at a bowling alley arcade. These damn swerves. They’re so satisfying.
I can’t get the WandaVision episode three theme song out of my head. This show was meant to come before WandaVision, but I saw a chronology timeline that claimed this takes place after it.
I’m really not into huge action sequences--I find them to be the most boring part of any superhero movie, but this is a good one. It is, however, ten minutes long. Still no Bucky.
Ahhhh Rhodey!!! Rhodey’s here! (From Iron Man, but then he’s also in the Avengers movies, so you should probably know who he is.)
Oh, Sam’s giving the shield to the Smithsonian. 
Excuse me, he chose not to become Captain America??
Welp, there’s Bucky. Being murderous. EXcuse me??? What did he just say???? Fuck off. I thought the Wakandans helped him :(
Never mind. It was a nightmare. So he’s meant to be being a law-abiding citizen, and failing. He’s in therapy, and she is calling him out. 
Bucky just asked out a girl, and it feels so wrong, but that just shows how immersed I am in the #stucky ship.
So Sam’s widowed sister is trying to get a bank loan, and they’re real idiots. The bankers, that is. They’re having a go because Sam didn’t have any income in the last five years--gee, I wonder why.
Sam just got a text from Torres--a member of the air force, who he’s working with--and the text ends with ‘#important’. I get the feeling the writers don’t understand no-one uses hashtags in texts.
Newsflash, and the mayor’s announcing a new Captain America, and it’s...  show me the face. Show me the face. Who the fuck is that?
Alright, well, and cut to seven minute-long credits. Well. I have questions. A good episode, though nothing exceptional. And just like the early WandaVision episode, no credit scene.
Episode Two: ‘The Star-Spangled Man’ Released March 26th, this episode also has a 49 minute runtime, and the title is clearly referencing the ‘new’ Captain America. I say ‘new’ because even though I don’t know who this guy is yet, fuck him. Anyway.
There’s a guy in some kind of locker room, who I’m assuming is the new Captain America, who was apparently a football player. I just want to know if they pulled more super soldier shit. The captions say his name is John Walker.
Cue the Marvel logo... with some weird-ass music. Okay, it’s just a... dancing marching band, at the Captain America presentation. They’ve given him a new symbol, like an A turned into a five-pointed star. Apparently he’s the first person to ever receive three Medals of Honour, run missions in counterterrorism and hostage rescue, and he has some fancy-ass physicality. This guy seems alright, but I’m just mad they didn’t tell Sam what they were going to do with the shield. At least he likes Steve.
God, Steve would be pissed. Ay, Sam and Bucky are finally in a scene together!
My favourite trope: ‘I’m doing this with you!’ ‘No, you’re not.’ [cut to them doing the thing together]. 
Bucky followed Sam on a mission to Munich, Germany, to do with the Flag Smashers, a free border organisation mentioned in episode one. They’re just glaring at each other, and I love it. God, I love their dynamic.
This has ‘What’s our plan of attack?’ ‘The plan? Attack’ vibes. And Bucky just jumped out of a fucking plane without a parachute. Steve Rogers who? (I think I made that joke in my episode one commentary about Sam. They take so much after their father.)
Sam made a joke about Bucky becoming White Panther after Wakanda, and apparently he’s now the White Wolf. I’m pretty sure that’s a comic book alias, but this is its first MCU mention.
OOOOh, the action sequences in this are fun. And there’s a kid in the back of the bad guys’ truck. Why’s she smiling?
And she just blasted Bucky out onto the road. Wonderful. She’s also a Flag Smasher. Yes, Sam! Yes!
Maybe don’t drive your lorries side by side in the same direction on a two-way road? Just a thought?
And roll in John Walker. You’d think they’d be having a harder time staying stood on lorries travelling this fast.
And Captain America has a fucking gun. No. No. Steve just used a frisbee! Don’t do this, Walker, you bastard.
So apparently the Flag Smashers are all super soldiers. That doesn’t bode well. I don’t think Walker is, though. 
And this suit does nothing for his ass. It just isn’t America’s.
So they all rolled off the lorries, and the bad guys got away. Walker rolled up beside Sam and Bucky in a military vehicle, and they’re just refusing to get in.
‘Just ‘cause you carry that shield, it doesn’t mean you’re Captain America.’ THANK YOU.
‘You ever jump on top of a grenade?’ ‘Yeah. Actually, I have. Four times.’ You fucking what? Why? That doesn’t sound like Steve’s dumbassery, this sounds like genuine heroics. Disgusting. 
And they finally got in the car. So the Flag Smashers want to put things back how they were during the Blip.
‘Does [Bucky] always just stare like that?’ ‘You get used to it.’ !!!!!!
‘I’m not trying to replace Steve.’ Really? Because it sounds like you are.
I hate that the subtitles are calling him Captain America. He seems like a fine guy, but really?
So apparently there was a super soldier in the Korean War. 
Great. Police racism, demanding to see Sam’s ID but not Bucky’s, until the other policeman points out they’re Avengers. Wonderful. And they’re now arresting Bucky for missing his court-mandated therapy.
Also, I didn’t even acknowledge the fact Bucky got a haircut somewhere before the show stars. I was conscious of it, but I didn’t even think to say anything because I’m just used to seeing Sebastian Stan with short hair.
So John Walker got Bucky out. And Bucky’s therapist is forcing him and Sam into a session. HA, she’s giving them couple’s therapy. This is intense. She made them do some soul-gazing shit, and they started having a staring contest!
AND they’re going to go see Zemo, the villain from Captain America: Civil War. I knew he was in this show, but they’re just going to willingly have a conversation with him?? And again, no credit scene.
This was definitely a better episode than the first--the first honestly felt kind of unnecessary, and I think they just wanted to put the new Captain America at the end of an episode to build tension as a cliffhanger, which is a little annoying but does make sense.
I’m going to be constantly comparing this show to WandaVision, but it’s a lot less mysterious than WandaVision. Mystery isn’t necessary for a show to be good; there’s just a stark contrast between the two shows in that aspect.
Episode Three: ‘Power Broker’ Released April 2nd, this episode has a 53 minute runtime. We open with an ad for the Global Repatriation Council, apparently an organisation focused on helping those who were Blipped reintegrate, though I’m really confused what this has to do with anything--it’s not like the ads in WandaVision, because this is the first we’ve had. I guess the GRC must show up in this episode, but I don’t really think the ad is necessary.
I don’t want to give a rundown of this show like I did with WandaVision, so I’m just going to mention which scene each comment is for.
They’ve really given Zemo an atmospheric cell. Also, this bitch, saying the words that turned Bucky into the Winter Soldier. This bitch and his audacity. Now he’s sorry? That’s hilarious.
Why in fuck’s name does Bucky want to break Zemo out??? I’m really with Sam on this one. What is Bucky’s point here?
And now they’re breaking him out. Wonderful. Nope, never mind, just a... imagining? Nope. He did it. Zemo’s out. This seems like a bad idea. He’s going to betray them. That’s just how stories work.
Ah. Snake gut cocktail. Lovely.
I hate that Bucky’s pretending to still be the Winter Soldier. Hate it. And now Zemo’s trying to sell him. No. Good writing, sure, but still.
Love the ‘kill them’, then gets shot. Love it.
SHARON! YAY! I don’t even like Sharon that much, mostly because her romance with Steve was weird, but yay!
Sam: *takes off his shirt* Sharon: Much better.
‘The bionic staring machine.’ I mean, Sam’s not wrong, but still.
I can’t tell if this song, where they’re walking through this place with pistols, is just background music or actually playing, but I love it. Okay, it’s real. It has Umbrella Academy vibes.
Nope. Zemo has his mask. I don’t trust this. There he goes. Wait. He didn’t betray them? Why? It might just be poor comprehension, but I’m confused.
‘You’re not gonna move your seat up, are you?’ ‘No.’ Bucky gets his revenge on Sam. 
So a woman showed up at the end, head shaven, and, according to the subtitles, spoke Wakandan. I think it’s the woman who came with T’Challa in Captain America: Civil War, but i’m not completely sure.
But, hey, that’s episode 3. I didn’t enjoy it as much as episode 2, because, mad as I am they replaced Cap, so far, I quite like John Walker’s character, and I think it’s a really interesting plot line. This was still better than episode 1 though, which just felt like set-up.
Episode Four: ‘The Whole World is Watching’ This episode was released April 9th, this morning, with a 53-minute runtime, and I’ve already been told John Walker does something unredeemable in this episode, so I’m scared. Let’s go.
And we have an explosion, kids. It’s a previously on, never mind. I don’t remember the explosion, but it’s fine. Okay, yeah, the woman at the end of the last episode was the woman from Civil War. I need to look up her name.
Oh, yep, her name’s Ayo, and she’s a member of the Dora Milaje. Lovely.
Jesus, we’re in Wakanda. Why am I scared? Six years ago. Bucky in Wakanda. Right. With Ayo. I hate seeing him cry, God. 
Back to present day. Of course she’s mad about Zemo. I’d also be mad about Zemo. I am mad about Zemo. She gave him a time limit--I think time limits are fun. Build tension. They’re great.
God, Zemo walking down a street full of children singing Baa Baa Black Sheep is so... 80s. Maybe don’t offer sweets to children you don’t know?? Like?? I mean his tactic’s working. Unlike Sam’s. This bitch just turned the children against Sam and Bucky. As you do.
And they have more serum. I’m going to be honest, the supersoldier thing’s pretty elitist, unless they intend to make everyone in the world a supersoldier. I can’t help but see a capitalist versus socialist metaphor here, but then I find those in literally everything.
I do like Walker’s character--he’s entertaining--but as a person, no thank you. I also really like the fact Karli Morgenthau is British, but not quite in the way most British characters in US shows. I fit the stereotypical accent, but you don’t really see other English accents in American shows.
Walker you little bitch, you said he had ten minutes. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don’t guilt-trip Bucky, you shit. And here we go.
I hate the fact this episode mean’s we’re already 2/3 of the way through the series.
And Zemo’s absolutely going to take that serum. Nope. He’s smashing it. I mean, that’s one way. Not the way I expected, but still. And he missed one. Walker’s going to take it. I know he is. And he pocketed it. Yep.
Okay, I would absolutely take the serum if I were offered it. I bet Walker’s going to take it at the end of the episode, though. Who has a bow??
And he’s the Dora Milaje. Pff, it wasn’t even an arrow; it was a spear.  I’m with the Dora Milaje in this scenario, absolutely. Love that Sam and Bucky are just stood there, doing nothing. What’s the point of Lemar Hoskins? He doesn’t do anything.
Don’t unbolt Bucky’s arm, you ass. 
And Zemo’s gone. Now, who could’ve seen that coming? 
Why the hell is Karli calling Sam’s sister??
Sharon put a tracker on Walker? Smart. 
Well, we found Zemo. God, I miss Steve. 
Did Karli just kill Hoskins??
And Walker just smashed this guy’s head in. Lovely. What a Captain America thing to do.  Ooh, the bloody shield’s kind of a vibe though.
So that’s episode 4, and oh my lord.
Episode Five: ‘Truth’ 16th April, and... crap, it’s 07.26, of course, the episode’s not up yet. Will return in like half an hour.
Okay, it’s past 8am, and the episode is...up. Lovely. It’s 60 minutes long, and I’m terrified, because someone told me about a theory that Bucky was going to die in this episode.
Lemar does seem to be dead, which is disappointing, because that would mean his entire character existed solely to motivate Walker to kill that guy, which isn’t very satisfying. Lemar Hoskins is a comic book character though, so who knows.
I mean. At least murderous Captain America is in anguish. He deserves it. Serious credit to the actor, by the way. Wyatt Russell got a lot of hate about his character, and I get why people don’t like the character, but he’s hugely interesting and Russell plays him so well.
So Lemar Hoskins is not dead. Doesn’t exactly put Walker in a good light. He’s obviously not going to give Sam the shield, for God’s sake.
Bucky just looks amazing with the short hair and the blue coat. It’s great. Love it.
And now Walker’s trying to kill Sam. Great idea. Did he take the serum already? Because that would explain why he’s become so brutish. Hold up. No, I don’t think he has. But who knows. Clearly not me.
Yep, trying to choke Sam. Very Captain America of you, John. And he tried to smash his head in. Thank God for Bucky. And Sam got the shield. Good.
There’s cat hair everywhere around me right now.
Well, that intro was very, very fun.
Did Sam just give up the wings...? Why...?
Glad, at least, that Walker’s no longer Captain America. Yep, yelling in a courthouse. Great way to warrant lenience. It’s the good-man-perfect-soldier balance again: Steve was always a good man first, where Walker’s first a soldier.
So Walker did take the serum. That makes sense. It exaggerates personal qualities, so Walker’s anger and... vengefulness.
Is Bucky actually going to kill Zemo? No. No, the gun’s empty. I’m not sure I get why Bucky would take out the bullets intentionally, but alright. 
Hope Zemo has fun with the Dora Milaje.
This storyline with Sam’s sister is so wholesome compared to the rest of the show. So Bucky brought Sam something in a case, and I just want to know what is is. He said is was a gift from the Wakandans, so obviously tech of some kind. New wings?
I’m really confused as to whether or not Lemar Hoskins is dead. He seemed dead. Walker thought he was dead. Then this woman said he isn’t, but now Walker’s going to his family, so... yeah, I guess he is, and I just have really poor comprehension. 
Sam’s nephews playing with the shield is adorable.
Aww, Sam’s learning how to use the frisbee. I know it’s more intense than that, but it’s literally a frisbee.
Soooooo the Flag Smashers are attacking the UN. As you do. 
Credit scene! Credit scene! Walker’s hammering, making... something. A shield. Great. Wonderful. love how he thinks he can make a better one than Tony Stark. Sure. And that, my friends, wraps up episode 5, and marks us as 83% of the way through the show.
Episode Six: ‘One World, One People’ It’s April 23rd. And the last episode is up. Just going to finish the chapter of my audiobook first.
This title is very exciting, and the episode’s 51 minutes long. Let’s go.
Honestly, I’m not huge on shows this intense, but I am enjoying this, which I think is because a) I know the characters, and b) it’s only one episode a week.
Oh, hell yes. Falcon America. Honestly, costume looks kinda dumb. Awww, the subtitles are calling him Captain America. 
This show hasn’t been nearly as exciting as WandaVision, because it lacks the mystery aspect. It’s definitely more for Marvel fans than the other series. What’s next? Loki? Yeah. I just googled it, and Marvel’s really putting out a lot this year. Which is probably because we had a year of nothing, but we’re getting four shows (WandaVision, FatWS, Loki, Hawkeye--which doesn’t yet have a definitive release) and four movies (Black Widow, Shang-Chi, the Eternals, and Spider-Man 3, which I wasn’t expecting until at least next year).
I feel like I just don’t have much to say about what’s happening, because it’s basically just a battle, which I’m never hugely interested in. I’m not really an action person.
Oh, and apparently Ms. Marvel’s this year, too.
Going through a list, clearly, and you mean to tell me we’re not getting Guardians Vol. 3 until six years after Vol. 2??
And fuck. Hey, Walker. In a costume that isn’t yours. Christ, Karli. 
Honestly, I’m really fidgety because all I want to do is watch Shadow and Bone, because the entire series has been out for nine damn hours--I could’ve watched it all by now--but I’ve been busy, and I promised I’d watch it with somebody, and godddd.
We got a far-out shot of Walker dressed as Captain America just then, and I honestly thought it was Nebula. Anyway, offended that Walker dares to think he gets to wear that costume and follow up Steve Dumbass Rogers. Uh-uh.
GOD I just want to watch Shadow and Bone. Christ. I’m desperate. it’s on my Instagram, it’s on Tumblr... that’s it, but oh my God. I so hope it’s good. If it’s bad I’ll literally be distraught.
Oh, thank god. It has 94% on Rotten Tomatoes. Good.
No. Christ. God, I just want to watch it.
Screw it. I’ll finish this episode tomorrow. Byeeee.
Okay, I’m back. I watched all of Shadow and Bone. Let’s keep going!
So I did get about halfway through, yesterday, bar credits, so there’s that.
I love the symbolism of the new Falon/Captain America costume, but that doesn’t stop it from being really, really ugly.
Appreciate the speech about society being screwed up.
Why are they showing the prisoner transport? Something’s clearly going to happen. Did they just blow up the prison van??
And Walker got a new costume. That’s concerning. Give me the name, honey. US Agent. That’s bullshit.
So it is apparently his actual comic book name, but it’s still terrible.
And it said Captain America and the Winter Soldierrrrrrrr. Which is already a film. I mean, the film doesn’t have ‘and’ in it, but still. Anyway. Positive symbolism. Shall we check for a credits scene?
They’re pardoning Sharon. Huh. Nice.
There’s something ominous at play here. Great, so Sharon really is a villain here. That’s fun. 
And that, my friends, wraps up Falcon and the Winter Soldier. I didn’t enjoy it as much as WandaVision, partly for the mystery, but mostly for sheer tone--this was much more your typical darker action film, where WandaVision was more light-hearted, even towards the end.
Regardless, this was a really interesting addition to the MCU, though may not be worth it if you’re not already invested.
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xxx-cat-xxx · 6 years
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Lights and Sounds
Happy 4th of July to all my US followers! I´ve read a bunch of great Tony vs. migraine stories recently and got inspired. Featuring Peter, Happy and Pepper. Tags for lots of pain, some emeto and a tiny bit anxiety.
“Kaboom!” Peter shouts after punching Tony hard into the ribs. “You didn´t see that coming, Mr Stark, did you?”
As a matter of fact, Tony didn´t, and that is part of the problem. The aura that has been obstructing his field of vision since the morning has spread to conceal most of what´s on his left in a white haze, and Peter´s fist has caught him completely off guard. Tony groans tiredly, resisting the urge to cover his aching eyes with a boxing glove.
“Could you stop accompanying each of your actions with graphic comic book expressions, that would be marvellous.” he spits into the kid´s direction.
Peter frowns at him. “Mr Stark, are you al-” but Tony silences him with an unexpected right hook that leaves both of them reeling.
He´d worked on his repulsor upgrades till three in the morning after sending the kid off to bed in the upstate Avengers facility where they are spending the weekend. Then he´d fallen asleep at his work bench just to wake up four hours later to a stiff neck and a pounding headache.
He´d skipped breakfast in favour of a hot shower and a bunch of painkillers that did nothing except making his stomach churn angrily. He knows exaclty that the only wise thing to do would be spending the day in bed, but he´d promised Peter a round of sparring before returning him to his aunt, and Tony Stark would not let something as petty as a migraine stop him from that.
Right now, however, he isn´t so sure how long he can keep up appearances before the kid will notice. Aura and a general feeling of lightheadedness are making his steps unstable and causing him to miss more punches than he lands.
The pain behind his eyes is already blinding, and he knows that the migraine is only in its beginning stages. He wishes that it will wait with kicking in full force until the kid is back at his aunt´s and he is back at his tower, but he doubts the universe will answer his prayers.
Another of Peter´s punches hits him in the stomach, making him bend reflexively, and for a frightening moment he is fighting to keep down the nausea that´s suddenly threatening to take over. God, he shouldn´t have taught the kid so well. When he straightens up, the world is spinning around him. Tony is stubborn, but not stupid. He knows when to make an exit.
“Happy, you take over”, he commands the bodyguard who had been watching their fight stoically, “I need a coffee.”
Tony is proud that he manages to climb out of the ring without toppling over, but the thought of getting to the kitchen is quickly dismissed when the gym starts swaying around him. He all but collapses onto the bench at the side of the room. Sparing a look at the Peter, he decides that the kid is too preoccupied with beating up Happy to notice, so he rests his head in his trembling hands, blocking out the burning lights.
A few hours, he tells himself, just a few hours and then he can shut himself off from the world in his bathroom and die alone. That is, until Pepper will expect him for their date night at six. He groans. Life was so easy back when all his personal commitments seemed to consist of training Dum-E and making a monthly donation to the boy scouts. But then again, whom is he kidding? He wouldn´t go back to that kind of life for anything in the world.
As if on clue, a hand lands on his shoulder. “Mr Stark, are you okay?”, Peter gasps, out of breath and grinning from ear to ear, apparently having won the recent episode with Happy. Tony squints up at him, the light from the artificial bulbs making his synapses protest in pain.
“I´m good, kid. Jeez, you smell like a soccer team´s been trapped in a sauna for a year.” He wrinkles his nose in feigned disgust. “Go, take a shower and make yourself presentable. I promised your super-hot aunt to drop you off by noon.”
“Hey, don´t talk about her like this!” Peter boxes him playfully into the shoulder, and Tony tries not to flinch. “And I beat you today, old man!” he shouts over his shoulder before running off to the changing area.
“I let you beat me”, Tony mumbles back. He takes a deep breath before straightening up and and grabbing the wall for support until the dizziness fades away. That´s gonna be a long day.
----
Tony gets into the driver´s seat before Happy even has a chance to. He hopes that driving will give him an excuse not to talk, and he also knows that he will make the way from upstate New York to Peter´s house twice as fast as Happy.  And, deep inside, he is absolutely aware that the true reason is simply his never-ending ambition to prove himself that he is stronger than a little bit of pain. It's just a migraine, after all. He's had them before, he´s survived all fine, and worse things have happened to him anyways.
Tony is wearing sunglasses although the sky is clouded, but the light still hurts in his eyes, as does about everything in his body right now. Happy dozes off after a few minutes. In the backseat, Peter starts to watch videos on his phone, a comedian talking too loud and too fast. Tony might find it amusing on any other day, but right now the artificial laughter from the audience feels like a hammer being smashed on his head.
“Pete, can you switch off that nonsense?” he demands, trying not to let his voice tremble.
The boy just gives him a look and plugs in headphones. He is uncharacteristically quiet for some time, until he finally asks, “Mr Stark, are you angry at me because of the boxing?”
“What?” Tony is so caught by surprise that he nearly drifts to the other side of the road. “God, what are you thinking, kid?”, he huffs, “I get it I´m kinda a show-off, but I wouldn´t get angry at you just because you land a few hits on a day I got a killer migrai-”
Shit, he wasn´t supposed to say that.
“You´ve got a migraine?” Peter bends closer to the front seat, immediately lowering his voice. “That´s why you were so out of it all day! Is it really bad? Why didn´t you say anything?”
“It´s okay, kid, not a big deal. Happens sometimes.” Tony reassures, trying to smile while swallowing down nausea.
Peter stares at him intensively. “I´m  - I´m so sorry, Mr Stark, I didn´t know. Is there anything I can do?”
“Na, I´m good. Just don´t be mad if I´m not up to fancy conversations today. And keep the volume down.”
Ten minutes later, Tony is sure that driving with a migraine was one of the worst ideas he´s ever had. He´s put the sunblinds down although it rains outside, but he still finds it hard to spot the outline of the road through the haze of pain and aura clouding his eyes. Every heartbeat reverberates like thunder in his ears. His whole body is oversensitive, the bumps in the pavement making him feel like he´s back in the boxing ring taking a beating and doing nothing to calm his rising nausea. God, he didn´t even know it was possible to get carsick while driving.
The stretch of road ahead of them is typically Sunday-morning quiet, until suddenly it isn´t anymore. The car seems to come out of nowhere, and all Tony can do is pull sharply to the emergency lane while the other vehicle´s side mirror rubs over their door with a screeching noise.
“What the hell was that?” Happy half-shouts at him, now wide-awake, “You nearly hit them!”
Tony doesn´t reply, he is busy bringing the car to a standstill with trembling hands. He can feel himself hyperventilating, pain from the migraine mixing with a surge of anxiety when he realizes that he barely avoided an accident. He nearly got Happy and the kid killed. Fuck. The nausea hits him full force, and he all but falls out of the door, bracing himself against the side of the car when he heaves. There´s not much to bring up, considering that he avoided breakfast today, but the stench of liquid and bile splashing on the ground assault his nerves and dials up the pain a few more degrees.
“Just let it out, okay?” The kid has jumped out behind him, hovering at his side. He tries to pat his shoulder, but Tony flinches away. Everything hurts. Holes are being drilled into his skull, but they do nothing to relieve the pressure. Instead it is just increasing with every retch, until he is sure that his head will burst open any moment. He can't see anymore, and he catches himself wishing he would pass out, just to make the pain stop.
When he is done he keeps on panting, not daring to move and cause the nausea to spike up again. For a moment he doesn´t know where he is, dark memories and panic pulling at him with luring fingers. He desperately tries to get himself under control. A hand tugs at his jacket, hesitantly. Someone comes from the other side and pulls him up. Tony´s overly sensible nose recognizes Happy´s aftershave and he nearly gags again.
When his vision clears, Peter and Happy have deposited him in the backseat. "I´m driving now”, the bodyguard states the obvious. Tony is miles from protesting.
----
The rest of the drive is agony. The nausea returns about two seconds after he's back in the car, but he vows to keep it down until the kid is gone. Tony leans his the head against his elbow in a crook of the window. He can feel Peter giving him worried looks from the side, but there's nothing he can do about it right now. Pain is tearing him apart from inside, eating his brain and spitting it out all upside down and scrambled up. He tries to distract himself with citing equations, but he can't remember a single one. For a moment, he´s irrationally afraid that he will never be able to.
It seems to take eternities until they reach Peter´s appartment building to drop him off. Tony gives him a tired thumbs-up and a very weak fake smile from under half-closed lids. “See you tomorrow”,  he croaks, swallowing heavily and hoping that he is not overconfident of his abilitiy to recover until then.
Happy stops at the sidewalk as soon as they are out of Peter´s view, and Tony heaves up air and acid for what seems like years. He can´t muster the energy to stop his former bodyguard when he hears him calling Pepper from his mobile.
When they finally reach the tower, she is waiting downstairs. He hadn't wanted her to know, god, he'd planned on throwing down the heaviest painkillers he can find together with a good amount of booze, getting a few hours of sleep and then showing up halfway presentable to make it through their date night. He didn't want to ruin it, again. But when her blurred form gets bigger through his squinting eyes, he's just incredibly glad to see her.
“Oh, Tony”, she whispers when he stumbles out of the car and into her.
“Come on, I expected a little more enthusiastic reaction. I'm still a very handsome guy who's come all the way to meet you.” he musters, trying not to slur.
"You look terrible", she replies, cool fingers wrapping around is aching neck and pulling it forward till his head rests in the blessedly dark curve above her collarbone. "And you smell like a sewer."
Tony doesn´t care. Pepper smells like home, which is finally something that doesn't make him more nauseous, and he decides that he never wants to move again. He holds her as tight as he can without breaking her. After a while, Pepper carefully leads him inside, taking on more of his weight than he'd like to admit. He allows himself a small moan when she bends to hit the elevator button and his balance is screwed up.
“Sorry for this,” he manages when they reach the bedroom.
“It´s okay, Tony. I´d rather have you here than somewhere in outer space fighting aliens”, she grins, gently lowering him onto the mattress.
Tony is sure he´d prefer any amount of aliens to the agony he is currently in, but he doesn´t say it out aloud. Instead, he shakily removes his pants and jacket while Pepper fetches a glass of water and deposits a trash can next to the bed. He crawls under the sheets and pulls the blanket over his head before she quietly slips in next to him.
“Jus´a few hours,” he mumbles as he curls up against the familiar warmth of her body. “Date night´s still on, gotta movie planned, you can look forward to it.”
“Yeah, of course, Iron Man”, she smirks with a hint of sarcasm. But her voice is all soft when she adds, “I always do.”
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jeonsdear · 6 years
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BTS: Yoongi 😎
Idol!Yoongi and YouTuber!reader Parts:  (12) Part: 11/15 Info: The time of the phone doesn’t match the time of the setting so just pay attention to the time stamp of the messages Notice: Ignore that the boys can’t speak English in real life Y/N: Your Name Y/c/n: Your country Y/nat: Your nationality Y/lang: Your language
We Accept the Love We Think We Deserve You are a famous YouTuber in your country who gets to interview BTS and Yoongi is intrigued by you.
A/N: HERE IS A NARRATIVE FOR YOUUU. Please excuse any mistakes, English isn’t my first language xx Part 12?
read my stories here request imagines, reactions and text messages here
You felt weirdly comfortable snuggled up against Yoongi and Hoseok as you three were watching the two youngest of the group trying to convince Seokjin to part-take in the spicy noodle challenge. Jungkook’s dark eyes were glazed over by the influence of alcohol and Jimin couldn’t stop giggling. Taehyung who had refused any kind of alcoholic beverage, sat to your feet smirking at his oldest Hyung’s attempts to look like he was way too mature for nonsense like that but in reality everyone knew that drunk Seokjin was up to everything.
“Noona, you too!‘‘
Jungkook’s enthusiastic exclamation was followed by a big bunny smile of his and you felt Yoongi’s laughter rumbling in his chest, one arm circling around your waist as he drew you closer to his body. You both had drowned a few shots which resulted in Yoongi loosening up a little bit and seeking skinship whenever he could. You didn’t mind. Quite on the contrary. You didn’t dare admit to yourself, not to anyone else, but whenever you felt his piercing gaze on you, your heart wouldn’t stop pounding. The boys had provided you with an amazing experience being on stage with them but all you had cared for ever since Yoongi had told you he’d visit your country, was seeing him. You had missed him. You knew it was irrational and dumb and the past mistakes of your former relationship had left deep wounds, but you felt so save whenever Yoongi held you or whenever a message of his popped up on your phone. You trusted him in a way that you rarely trusted people in. Whenever you were faced with difficulties or you came home after a long and miserable day, he was the one you turned to. And in return he did, too. Ever since the conversation about how he didn’t feel loveable you couldn’t stop thinking about it. The words were still making you mad and your heart hurt because deep down you knew you know he was, you knew you loved him. Even if you wouldn’t let your mind admit it. So when you felt the man’s arms pulling you even closer to him, feeling the muscles of his chest against your back, you had to bit your lip to muffle the sigh that was threatening to come out. Beside you, Hoseok watched you two intently, noticing the way you melted into his friend’s embrace and how Yoongi’s lips hovered over the crown of your head. When Hoseok lifted his head he was met with Namjoon’s eyes who were observing you two as well. A small smile played on his lips and Hoseok realized that he wasn’t the only one who could see Yoongi falling for the foreign girl.
Namjoon loved you, in a way a brother would love his sister, and he understood why his friend was falling for you. All these late night conversations while writing songs with Yoongi had taught him how lonely their second oldest actually was. Deep insecurities rooted in his soul, his outlet being music. Namjoon had tried numerous times to ease his friend’s worries but only when you had come around Yoongi had started to really trust another person to take on his troubles. Now watching the content smile on Yoongi’s lips as he had his girl in his arms and his friends around him terrified Namjoon. Technically neither of the boys had to deal with the usual dating ban Idols had to stick to, but there was a reason a ban like this existed in the first place. Dating wasn’t easy living a life of an Idol. And the last thing he wanted for his Hyung was to get a taste of what love might taste like only to have it taken away.
“Jungkook, I’m y/nat. We don’t do spicy stuff like you. I might die.“
Yoongi behind you snorted which made you pinch the skin showing through his ripped jeans.
Yoongi’s “Yah, y/n!‘‘ was followed by Jungkook’s “I’m strong enough to carry a dead body!‘‘ and the room erupted in laughter. The air filled with happiness and comfort had you wishing you could experience this more often. Somehow these boys had turned into your closest friends and Yoongi, who now playfully tried to hide your frame from the others, made you dream about his lips.
The youngest moved forward to grab you and tickle your sides but you searched shelter in the crook of Yoongi’s neck, and his low laughter filled your ear as he turned with you in his arms and suddenly his weight was on you and all Jungkook got was a grasp of the back of Yoongi’s shirt.
“Respect your elders, Kookie.‘‘, you teased and stuck your tongue out at him and the younger boy’s eyes crinkled with laughter.
“That’s how you treat your bias? Aish, thanks y/n.‘‘, he grinned before Yoongi’s hand shoved at his maknae’s head.
“You’re not her bias, brat.‘‘
“Yes, I am.‘‘, he sang gleefully, eyes glistening with mirth. “I saw a fan video after we became friends with her and people made those ‘get to know her‘ videos. And she once talked about us and when she was asked who her bias was she said it’s meeeeeeeeee.‘‘
Jimin back-hugged Jungkook and laughed in Yoongi’s face. “Seriously, y/n? The youngest?“
Yoongi faced you with a raised eyebrow and you couldn’t help but groan before you blushed. “I love his voice?‘‘
His eyes darkened and searched your face for the truth before a sly grin stretched his lips. “His voice? You know, he sounds like a girl when he moans.‘‘
Seokjin was caught in a coughing fit before you could hear his high-pitched laughter and when you turned your face you saw Jungkook gaping at his Hyung.
“Uhm I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do with that information or why you know how he sounds …when he…you know. But I still love his voice.“
Namjoon just chuckled but Jimin piped up saying “We’ve been living together for years. Trust me, we know.“
In the meantime, Jungkook had regained his composure and an evil glint had entered his eyes.
“I sound like a girl? You know the walls are thin Hyung and I’m up late a lot of times.‘‘
He turned to you and smirked. “If you ever want to know how he’d sound like, let me know. I can record it.‘‘
The terror in Taehyung’s eyes was almost comical and everyone except for Yoongi and you moved forward to slap a body part of Jungkook’s that was the nearest.
You were torn between laughing and running away, but Yoongi’s hand grasping yours and pulling you upwards with him solved that pretty quickly.
“You’re lucky I love you.“, he growled at his youngest member before pulling you with him out of the room. A groan filled the floor of the hotel and it had you giggling.
“You’re so soft for him.‘‘, you teased gently before you intertwined your fingers with his and pulled him with you in the direction of your own room.
“He’s a brat. I can’t believe he’s your bias. Seriously?“
Laughing you shrugged your shoulders, entering the elevator that would take you ten floors higher. The light was dim and you could see Yoongi’s eyes fixed on you in the mirror as you leaned back against the wall. His thumb gently rubbed soothing circles into your skin and you could feel it deep in your bones.
“He is a lot like me. I think that’s why.“
Murmuring something incoherent, Yoongi took a step closer to you, knee’s touching your thighs.
“So he’s your favourite?“, he said slowly and gauged your reaction. Your eyes were still filled with laughter and he could have sworn he never saw something as beautiful as you.
“No, he’s my bias Yoongs. But you’re my favourite.‘‘
Your eyes followed his movements as he bit down on his lips before soothing it with the tip of his tongue. For fuck's sake, now you couldn’t stop staring at his lips and Yoongi noticed too. The atmosphere changed from playful into something thicker and when you met his dark gaze all the longing and desire you had kept at bay instantly filled your whole system. Yoongi noticed the way your breath hitched in your throat and how your eyes started to darken, his body moving closer on its own accord.
“Say that again.“, he begged quietly and watched you swallow.
“What?“
“My name. Yoongs. I love when you say it out loud.“
He was met with a gentle smile and his heart jumped in his chest.
“Yoongs…“, you whispered and his hands came up to cradle your face. Seeking for permission he scanned your face for any indicator of uncertainty, but when he wasn’t able to find any he stopped thinking and within second his lips had touched yours. Carefully, he placed little kisses against the softness of your lips and you wrapped your arms around his waist. His lips felt soft under yours and you couldn’t help but sigh in relief to finally get a taste of him, melting into his embrace and his strong body. Your sigh was Yoongi’s clue and he bit your lip carefully to ask for entrance, making you open your lips and suddenly you felt his tongue against yours and any rational thought was erased from your mind. Everything that existed was the man kissing you and the longing filling your body.
Yoongi tried. He really did. He wanted to be gentle and soft, loving even. But as soon as your sigh had filled the small space his body reacted like a starved man and he couldn’t keep himself from pulling you tighter to him and deepening the kiss. Oh, how many times had he imagined doing this? Kissing you. Holding you to him like this? And now, that he finally did, his body was in overdrive and everything he wanted was the woman in his arms.
As if both your body’s had known each other for years, you worked in perfect unison, knowing exactly how to angle your heads, how to caress each other lips and tongues. Your hands moved up to his neck and your fingers tangled in his soft hair, making Yoongi groan lowly into your mouth. With that sound, your body was on fire and you shivered under his exploring hands. He felt your tremor and you felt him smirk into the kiss, turning the whole affair even hotter than it already was.
“I’m your favourite, huh?“, he murmured, still smirking when you both came up for air. Breaths mingling all you could do was nod, afraid your voice had gotten lost. Starring at each other you realized that you had reached your floor in the meantime and Yoongi didn’t waste any time, grabbing your hand and pulling you with him.
“Which room?“
Instead of answering you gave him your room key and with quick strides and a swipe of the key card he had you pressed back against your hotel room door. Not a second later his lips were on yours again and you started to laugh when he whined against your lips.
“Someone’s a little eager.“, you teased and the sound coming out of his mouth proved your point once again.
“I’ve wanted to do this for so long so please stop talking and let me kiss you, yeah?“
Your laugh turned into a surprised moan when he grabbed the undersides of your thighs and hoisted you up onto his hips, holding you against the door.
“Looks like I’m not the only one.‘‘, he whispered and captured your lips in a heated kiss, your fingers findings their way into his hair again.
He was right of course. You had wanted this for so long that you felt a little lost in how to be even closer to him than this. Your whole body was screaming for him and shivered when his tongue danced expertly with yours. He was good. He was a fucking great kisser and you didn’t know whether he knew, but he might be able to judge by the way you were clinging to him. Yoongi sucked your tongue into his mouth and rolled his hips, driven by pure instinct, into yours.
“Fuck“, you coursed in your native tongue and his hands tightened on your thighs.
“Shit, I love when you talk in y/lang.“
Yoongi looked at you with glazed over eyes and a heaving chest, eyes fluttering shut when you involuntarily bucked your hips into his.
“Baby, don’t.“, he growled but his words lost their meaning when he pressed his middle against you.
The playfulness returning, you raised an eyebrow and wiggled a little in his hold, creating friction.
“Don’t what, Yoongs?“
“Don’t tempt me, Y/n.“
Your head fell back with a thud when he lowered his head to lick over your pulse point before biting it gently, moving down your neck and sucking the soft skin between his lips to leave purple marks.  When you tried to pay him back he shook his head gently remind you that he can’t be seen with hickeys at the airport, so you settled for burying your head in his neck and leaving light pecks.  
At some point, he had walked you over to the big, cosy looking bed in the middle of the room and through lazy kisses and occasional giggling, you both calmed down. Laying half way atop of him, Yoongi pulled the covers over your forms and pressed a soft kiss on your forehead.
“What about the boys?“, you murmured with a yawn and you felt him smile against your temple. The only light in the room was coming from the moon as you hadn’t shut the blinds and soft rain danced across the glass.
“Probably passed out asleep by now“, he answered and tightened his arms around you and you hummed in content. It was silent for quite some time, neither of you wanting to disturb the tranquillity but right before you drifted off to sleep you started giggling.
“Yoongi?“
“Hmm?“, he hummed sleepily and popped open one eye.
“Kookie was wrong.“
“Wrong with what?“
“You don’t moan like a girl.“
Yoongi’s deep chuckle followed you into your sleep.
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teacoffeeandwhatnot · 5 years
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The Gay Agenda - Chapter 5
 Look at me, actually uploading when I said I would oml! Chapter 5 is here, and its Jren. 
Please keep in mind, sentences written in Italic is what is being said by the panel, or people in the studio. Normal text is what is happening otherwise.
As always, also available on my Ao3!
(if you want me to tag you every time i update, please dont hesitate to message me and I’ll add it in the next chapter)
“Our next contestant is Choi M-“
“Holy shit, is that Minki?!” Jeonghan interrupts Holland, jumping out of his seat to get a better look at the screen in front of them.
“Uhh, yes, do you know him?” Holland questions.
“Yeah, shit, he’s my cousin. I don’t know why I didn’t think of him for this show, he’s like a lover of all things gay. Also, he already works here so it’s perfect.”
“Well then, I guess I can save myself the introduction,” Holland laughs. “Do you happen to know what his type is?”
“Oh yeah, for sure. He’s into like super nerdy guys which is kind of ironic because, even though he works in the freaking comic book store, he could not be less interested in them.”
“Ah, well then it should be easy to find someone that’s his type then, I guess. Let’s see how he gets on.”
He knows he should really be spending his money on better things as a 23-year-old, but Jonghyun can’t help himself, so he finds himself on the bus for his weekly visit to the comic book store. It also has nothing to do with the pretty shop clerk whom he has successfully avoided talking to for weeks now, nope. Nothing at all. He totally doesn’t spend half his time there staring at him, and not the comic books. Definitely not.
Ever since the new guy has started working there, his visits to the store have become significantly more nerve wracking and he finds his hands sweating a worrying amount every time he pushes the door open. He really needs to get his shit together.
He walks straight to the Haikyu section, deliberately not looking towards the counter, where he knows the beautiful boy is. He knows his name is Minki, having glanced at his name tag out of the corner of his eye last time, when he had been busy ringing up another costumer.
Even though he only glanced in his direction for about half a second through the glass door before entering, he is still hyperaware of Minki, slouching over the counter, looking bored out his mind, sucking on a goddamn lollipop. He also belatedly realizes that Minki seems to be the only employee here, which means that, if he wants to buy something, he will inevitably have to talk to him. Which is generally a good thing, forcing him to finally have a conversation, but he’s also scared shitless. He knows he gets all stuttery and awkward when faced with pretty people he may or may not have a small (massive) crush on, so there is probably a high chance he’s going to embarrass himself. For a second he considers just not buying anything and high tailing it out of the store, before he realizes how stupid that is. He gives himself a short mental pep-talk before finally deciding to get his shit together, picks up the book he wants and makes his way towards the counter. Previously he had always waited, sometimes agonisingly long, until Minki was busy or went on break and his co-worker took over, before he went to the counter, as to avoid the situation he was in now.
He placed his book on the counter, finally managed to look up and made direct eye contact with Minki for the first time. He was frozen for a minute, lost in the man’s eyes before he was shaken out of his stupor.
“Only this then?” Minki asked.
“Uh, y-yeah.” Jonghyun mentally cursed at himself for the little stutter and cleared his throat. “Just this one today,” he managed, trying to sound a little more confident and not like his legs were about to give in any second.
“So have you finally decided to stop avoiding me then?” Jonghyun’s head snapped up from where he lowered it again, staring at Minki with a panicked expression, who was smirking at him with a knowing smile.
“What? I was not- I’m not- I didn’t…,” he stuttered, trying to come up with a reasonable explanation.
“Dude, literally every time you’re here you stare holes into the side of my head but you never come up to the counter when I’m here and always wait till Minhyun is at the counter or I’m busy. I feel a little bit offended to be honest, what do you have against me? I don’t bite.”
Minki says all of this with a smirk on his face, so Jonghyun knows he isn’t mad, (and mortifyingly probably knows why Jonghyun was staring) but he can’t help but feel faint.
“I wasn’t staring at you.” Minki cocks his head, giving him a ‘you’ve got to be shitting me’ expression. “I just admire those posters behind the counter.”
“Sure you do, my dude, sure you do.” Jonghyun doesn’t think his face will ever return to its natural colour, destined to stay permanently crimson at this point. He realizes that Minki is almost done ringing up his book and with that his time actually talking to him will be over soon. Scrambling to keep the conversation going, he asks, “Uh, so I’ve been looking for a new series, preferably something similar to Haikyu, so like sports and rivalries, etc. do you have any recommendations?”
Minki shrugs, “No idea, dude, I’ve never read a manga in my life. I can ask my colleague though and let you know?”
Jonghyun belatedly realizes his mouth is hanging open in shock and quickly closes it.
“What do you mean you’ve never read one, you work in a comic book store?”
“Yeah, because my cousin, whether he admits it or not, is a sucker who would do anything for me, and he knows the owner so he got me the job. I’m a broke college student, I take what I can get. ”
“Fucking brat,” Jeonghan mumbles under his breath.
Up until this point, Jonghyun had been convinced that Minki was perfect and most definitely the love of his life, but this could not be overlooked. This was a major character flaw that needed to be corrected immediately.
“Ok, but like that’s unacceptable. I’m sorry, but you have no choice, you have to be educated. I will sacrifice my precious time and be your teacher, out of the goodness of my heart.”
(Minki honestly couldn’t believe that it could’ve gone any better. Whether he knew it or not, the cute customer had done his whole job for him, and he didn’t even need to come up with some bullshit excuse to spend more time with him. He was going to win, for sure.)
“I’ll let you educate me under two conditions.”
“Ok? And those would be?”
“One, we go find a café and have a drink while you tell me all about your little… books.”
Jonghyun made a face. For one at the comment about his ‘little books’ and secondly out of confusion. Wouldn’t it make more sense for him to educate Minki in the comic book store, so he could provide examples?
“Uh sure I guess, I mean here would be better, but if you want. And the second one?”
“You have to tell me your name,” Minki grinned. “So far I’ve only been calling you Onibugi in my head.”
Once again, Jonghyun felt his face heat up. Minki had been calling him a nickname in his head? For how long? Did this mean that he would also think about him? This was lowkey too much information for him to handle all at once.
“O-onibugi? Why?”
“Cuz you kinda look like one, don’t you think?” Minki squished his cheek and Jonghyun was ready to die then and there.
They decided to go to a little ice cream parlour on the second floor of the mall, since Minki said he was craving a milkshake, and who was Jonghyun to deny him. The entire 3 minute walk there, Jonghyun could help but sneak glances at Minki’s side profile. His long hair swished gracefully back and forth as he was walking and Jonghyun really had to fight every nerve in his body to not give into his urge to run his fingers through it and see how soft it really was. The first time Jonghyun had seen Minki, he had thought that he was a girl, quickly proven wrong when Minki had called out to his co-worker in a voice too deep for a girl and called him hyung. Now, Jonghyun had never really thought about his sexuality in depth, so he probably would’ve fallen in love with Minki no matter if he was a girl or a boy, but he was kind of relieved that Minki had been a boy, since in his opinion, girls are even more terrifying to talk to than guys. Or so he had thought. Minki seemed intimidating no matter what, hence the long time it took him to start talking to him.
Arriving at the café, they quickly found a small table for two in the corner and scanned the menu.
“You want to share a milkshake?” Minki asked.
Considering Jonghyun could barely get through a conversation with him, he doubted he would survive sharing a drink with the other.
“Uh, no, I’m good, you get your own drink. I’ll pay.”
“Aww Jonghyunnie, that’s not what I meant, but thanks! So generous.”
The obvious flirting that Minki sends his way completely flying over his head, Jonghyun launches into a speech about Haikyu as soon as they get their drinks.
“Ok so, I don’t know where to begin. Let me just tell you the plot first, I think that’ll help you understand how awesome it is. So basically it’s about this guy who joins the volleyball team of this formerly prestigious high school and he’s like obsessed with this other player who is like the star player of this team and was basically like a jump god for them, so he trains all the time to try and become like him. He ends up…” Jonghyun trails off when he looks up and realizes that Minki doesn’t seem to be listening to him at all, but is rather just staring at his mouth. Self-consciously he rubs over his lips, thinking he might’ve gotten some of his milkshake somewhere on his face.
“Minki, are you even listening to me?”
“Huh? Oh yeah, sure I am.”
Jonghyun isn’t completely convinced, but continues trying to convince Minki that comics are the best thing in this world and that he is missing out.
“Ok well he ends up clashing really hard with this setter – how much do you know about volleyball by the way? Actually it doesn’t really matter – so anyways he clashes with this setter is also like a really good player so everyone calls him king, but he’s more like a tyrant, I guess? And yeah –“ Suddenly, there are lips on his. He was so engrossed in his speech he hadn’t realized that Minki had gotten closer, lifted his chin up and just planted one on him.
It was over way too quickly, Jonghyun hadn’t even closed his eyes and he just ended up stupidly blinking at Minki when he pulled back, with his mouth slightly open.
All of a sudden, all the pieces in his head seem to align. Holy shit, Minki had been flirting with him this entire time.
“Holy shit, you were flirting with me this entire time.”
Minki let out a loud laugh. “I’m glad you finally caught on, I thought I couldn’t make it more obvious. I mean I flat out told you I have zero interest in comics and yet I still listened to you ramble for like an hour. I felt like I had to help you along a little bit.”
Jonghyun scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “Yeah sorry, I get really into it when I talk about comics… also like… you’re beautiful? I thought you’d never go for someone like me. I mean, you could have anyone.”
“Not go for someone like you? What, you mean a cute, nerdy, hot guy with a deep voice? How the fuck could I not go for you?”
Before he could blush and stutter some more, Minki leaned in again and this time Jonghyun was prepared. He managed to close his eyes, kiss back and even cup the side of Minki’s face. He couldn’t believe that this was happened and inwardly cursed at himself for not talking to the cute clerk earlier.
Later, when they’re walking back to the comic book store hand in hand, Minki’s phone goes off.
“Oh hey Jeonghan, how are you?” “My cousin,” he mouths in Jonghyun’s direction.
“Sooooooooooooooo?”
“So, what, Jeonghan?”
“Soooo does it live up to all your day dreams and on a scale of 1-10, how good of a kisser is Jonghyun?”
“WAIT, WHAT? HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW?”
Pt. 4
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dragonofyang · 6 years
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why do you love eridan so much??? hes a little shit murderer
Ohoho anon you just opened the floodgates for exactly why I love that he’s a little shit murderer so buckle up
He, much like I, has a flair for the dramatic, as well as just a very striking character design with a very pretty shade of purple so visually he’s right up my alley with all the gold and purple and a motherfucking cape. I adore that shade of purple and have for years before reading Homestuck, I’ve owned lipstick that color for ages now, so getting into fandom and cosplay and such just makes my appreciation for appealing character design that much stronger. I could go into detail of why I love the aesthetics of all the trolls so much but that’s a topic for another post lmao but if you wanna know which other characters I love for their visual interest it’s (in no particular order) Kanaya, Feferi, and Nepeta as far as the post-scratch trolls go. Ancestors are always my fucking jam aesthetically, too but then again what don’t I love about them.
But looking at him from the perspective of an English major he’s very interesting as a character. He’s rounded and has a concrete history both in life and in relationships with the other characters, as well as having just a very striking personality. If I were to read him in a book, I would not forget who the fuck Eridan Ampora is precisely because his characterization wouldn’t let you. Granted, this applies to pretty much any of the main characters of Homestuck, so why does he strike more of a resonance with me than some of the others?
Excellent question and one that I can only theorize has something to do with his design but it also has something to do with what I discussed just a paragraph ago: his personality and his relationships. The full argument is under the cut so this is your TL;DR, anon.
His most key relationships we see as far as canonical romantic ones are Feferi and Vriska, so it’s through his relationships to them I’m going to analyze his character, as well as his relationship with his ancestor Orphaner Dualscar. As a character, we see that he’s a megalomaniac and has his head so far up his ass he’s talking around his horns, but we also see that he’s a historian, a tactician, a sailor, and extremely inventive, as proven by his doomsday devices and the detritus around his hive that show his nightly life. Granted, this alone just makes him sound like a bad 80′s sci-fi villain complete with the douchebag cape, even with all the potential to show off his battle prowess and tactical skills, which we see somewhat but not to the extent that we see him be, as you put it, “a little shit murderer”. He’s also one of the physically strongest trolls, being able to ride his lusus without holding the reins and not falling off when he fires Ahab’s Crosshairs, which I find interesting purely because Equius is cited to be the strongest of the trolls, but the others aren’t really ranked by strength. Then again, Equius is an outlier who arguably can’t be counted for an understanding of typical trollian strength, a topic which has been discussed to death.
But what do we get when we put this master tactician and egomaniac together with other characters? We get *drum roll* ROUNDED OUT CHARACTER AND DEVELOPMENT.
Let’s start with Vriska. Vriska is his kismesis. He despises her and sees her as his rival in many ways and often tries to think of things to outfox her craftiness. She antagonizes and mocks him and spurs him to create doomsday devices, and essentially highlights the worst ways he can utilize his skills in the murder trade. She also is the wit to his brawn in a sense, preferring mind games while he prefers more physical devices, again: doomsday devices and killing outright (his orphaning) rather than maiming somebody via a proxy (Terezi) or tricking them into being nearly killed (Tavros). So together they’re the tag team of all the ways they can fuck your shit up, but he also is fairly gullible because he falls for Vriska’s shit, then gets mad about it which I feel makes his otherwise-terrifying abilities and undercuts them with his obvious inability to not take things seriously.
However, the gullibility doesn’t much showcase how insidious it is as a flaw for Eridan than when he’s around Feferi. While Vriska doesn’t hide that she loves tricking him and toying with him, Feferi, whether intentionally or not, also uses Eridan for her own means. Feferi is where we get a more tender side of Eridan, because where Vriska exacerbates his worst traits and how they’re expressed, Feferi tempers him and shows more of his emotional range as a troll. Through her we see that he has a capacity for empathy and that he’s also a whiny little bitch when he’s not shooting whale lusii out of the sky or plotting the apocalypse over tea. Feferi herself is conflicted with killing lusii to feed G’lbgolyb, she has a sea animal rescue for the cute critters (of which is a whole other essay on the ethics of cute conservation that I’ve seen analyzed before but can’t remember where). But because Feferi herself is conflicted with her duty as an heiress, she passes the burden of orphaning trolls across Alternia to Eridan, who accepts. You could argue that he takes the job because he’s just that murder-hungry, but you have to also consider this: Feferi is the troll closest to him. She is his one confidant and he cares for her as a moirail. It’s his duty to be there for her and to help ease the burden of the cruel Alternian environment and society, so he takes on a grueling job of immense physical and emotional tax so that she doesn’t have to do it herself. Arguably this is her shuffling guilt onto Eridan because “hey, I’m not killing them” and therefore using him, but Eridan takes on the task of murdering lusii and does so knowing that it’s not his place in Alternian society. So as much as he’s an Imperial loyalist and a hemocasteist, he also is willing to shuck certain roles aside if it’s for the well-being of trolls he cares for, which lends some absolutely delicious conflict to him as a character.
By taking on the role of orphaning trolls, Eridan cements himself firmly to the reader as the next Empress’ right hand. This puts him in the role of executioner of the throne’s will, as well as echoing the role and footsteps of his ancestor, Orphaner Dualscar. Eridan looks up to Dualscar, effectively his better in every way (both to him and in record), but Dualscar also falls prey to Serket mind games which ultimately leads him to his not-so-humorous death at the hands of the Grand Highblood. Eridan is ironically following exactly his footsteps, which only truly get thwarted by entering the Medium in their SGRUB session. In the Medium, we get more proof still of Eridan’s prowess as a young military leader, as well as see just how ruthless a highblood raised to be the cream of the Alternian crop can be as he mistakenly kills all the angels on his planet.
However, the brunt of his conflict and my point of interest remains with how Feferi juxtapositions him and shows the reader just how much emotional potential there is for Eridan. Eridan’s flushed feelings for Feferi grow, and he’s so hesitant to admit his feelings to her for fear of rejection (an understandable fear, especially at that age), but here’s the kicker: his ego and his hemocasteism set him up for the most ultimate of failure because he refuses to accept Sollux as the better choice because of his massive flaws of being a classist bastard. The two of them had always been at odds in the comic for a whole slew of reasons that gets the fandom hot and bothered for that pitch ship, but it comes to a head here where Eridan is proving his selfishness by trying to get Feferi to jump ship and join Jack with him. As much as he cares about saving himself, he still cares for Feferi enough that he feels he can bargain her safety if she comes with him, even though there’s no proof or guarantee he could spare even himself from Jack Noir. He fights first to try and protect Feferi (albeit his reasoning/methods are at odds with his goal) and then he fights for himself and his perceived status as a highblood being usurped by a lowblood competitor, ultimately culminating in his death.
So why do I love him so much? The answer is so deliciously simple but so complicated all the same. I love him because he’s full of contradiction and drama and because we can get such a full picture of him. I love him because he is the result of being one of Alternia’s best and brightest, without the moral complications Feferi faces or the hemocaste complications of the other up-and-coming trolls in the cast. He is, at least in part, what Alternia is and what it does to its citizens and neither he nor the writing pull any punches. He’s a well-written deuteragonist who you’re not meant to feel sympathy for or have his villainous actions excused by his past and without the moral complications of being a hero in the story. His actions ultimately paint him as an antagonist, but by the gods he leaves with as much flair as he comes in and remains one of the most striking characters of the comic to me.
So he might be a little shit murderer, but there’s a reason you remember him as being a shit murderer.
And by God if that isn’t wonderful writing.
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darby-draws-archive · 6 years
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I got a bunch of q's for them siblings, Lauren Mark and Nathan!! 5-7, 10, 12, 17, 19, 27, 30 and 31!
Thank you for asking so many questions for these good siblings!! And for being so patient! :,) I feel like I could’ve gotten more into specific scenarios with some of these but I didn’t quite know where to start or which question would have the better examples. But I’m sure you’ll enjoy anyway, I’ve definitely got enough info down for sure! Under the cut for obvious rambling reasons.
5. What traits does each person find endearing in the other?
Mark: Lauren’s ridiculously confident in herself and Nate’s always really passionate and excited about what he does.Lauren: Nathan tries to be friends with everybody and Mark has always had my back. Nathan: Mark’s just the right amount of sarcastic to be fun and he takes the band really seriously. Lauren’s secretly a big softie even when she pretends she’s cooler than everyone else.
6. Which traits does each person find annoying in the other?
Mark: They never shut up.Lauren: Oh my god, Mark thinks he knows everything and Nate never shuts up. He’s the bratty baby brother neither of us asked for. (laUREN!) (its true but they still love him)Nate: tHEY’RE BOSSY. And patronizing. And cynical.
7. How often do they see each other? How often do they talk to each other?
Nate and Mark see each other at least once a week, more if there’s lots of band practice or concerts to play or just wanna hang out! They see Lauren a handful of times throughout the year, at holidays and random visits.
Mark talks with Lauren more than Nathan does, kinda on a weekly basis, sometimes more, depends how busy they are or if they’ve got Exciting Gossip. Lauren and Nate probably talk like once after most full moons and a handful of other times,,, Nate wants to hear how the werewolf adventures go.
10. What would they get for each other as birthday gifts?
Mark’s mostly just gives money tbh, sometimes he’ll go halfsies on more expensive gifts but he doesn’t normally Think of the good gifts. He might take them out like to the record store and buy some things they pick out themselves. This is particularly good with Lauren, since it’s also his birthday and he has the excuse to get stuff he wants, too.
Lauren will usually find various music related things, shirts an posters of some bands they like, patches and pins for their Cool Jackets™. Nate likes comic books and movies, Mark would like biographies of musicians or maybe some video game, it varies but she could definitely find some things.
Nate tries to get Lauren makeup and sometimes it works out. He’d probably be better off with a gift card for it but he’s insistent that he knows “the hottest new eyeshadow thingy” and “the trendiest nail polish colors this season”. (he just Says these things, he doesn’t actually know anything) I think Nathan gets Mark a fun vidya game because he knows everyone else is getting him band related stuff,, unless he’s specifically asking for things.
12. Do either of them have any hobbies or interests which annoy the other?
Nottt particularly? I can’t really think of anything, if they don’t share the interest in something they just kinda leave it alone. Maybe if Lauren had to listen to tooo much of their band practice at once it would annoy her, just because her hearing is sensitive and they’re loud bois. She WANTS to enjoy it but what can u do. Mark kinda thinks they’re both way too into the horror genre but he doesn’t mind all that much.
OF COURSE this was different when they were younger and they often teased one another for certain interests,, but they grew out of that. (okay, mostly,, light teasing may still happen..) Most themes involved Lauren (or Nate’s) love for pop music and boybands or when Nate started experimenting with his guyliner. (and Lauren only teased him bc it was poorly drawn on…)
17. When one is feeling down, how does the other respond?
I kinda mentioned this one with the bros here the first time I reblogged these questions, but to add on Lauren:
On minor sad days, Lauren’s the type to give advice if she can or some kind of generic comforting thing and then kinda joke with her brothers. She kinda downplays her helping, kinda like “the solution’s simple, you just, do this. Is that reALLY all you wanted to talk to me about???” And if she can get either of them to laugh after they’ve been crying then it’s fair game for her to tease them for it.
If it’s a major sad thing, she tries to be The Strong One in those types of situations, even if it’s hard. She’ll listen if they wanna talk and cry, try to sound reassuring when telling them that it’ll be okay.
Mark’s better at comforting Lauren, they were definitely closer growing up so they kinda know exactly what would help. She doesn’t like feeling “weak” from showing emotions but she doesn’t mind crying in front of him and he’s alright at calming her down. But really Lauren usually just needs someone to rant to and maybe give a little advice, (she won’t outright ask for it but she leaves looong pauses for you to suggest something..) Mark knows and can easily handle that.
Nate isn’t used to seeing a sad Lauren and wouldn’t quite know how to react. Can you…. Tease her for this??? Is that allowed? What would Mark do.. But really, he just tries to be his normal happy self to cheer her up! Tell a funny story or joke.
19. Has one ever had to stop the other from making a very foolish decision? And did the other listen to them?
APsolutely. Mark is Lauren’s impulse control and Nate’s bossy older brother. Mark does stupid shit too but I don’t think any of them really stop him. Though, Mark would actually listen to Lauren on occasion. They both wouldn’t really listen to Nate even if he did try to stop them?? They don’t trust his judgement any more than they do their own. Nate might listen to them about half the time maybe? Still very foolish…
Lauren might try to stop Nathan more, Mark’s old enough to do his own thing. Plus, she finds it funnier if Mark fucks something up somehow, with Nate it’s mostly just sad.
Mark used to try and stop Lauren from doing stupid shit a lot in their teen years, but now he stops Nate from doing stupid stuff more often just by proximity and how much they see each other in comparison. Nate is bound to do something foolish at some point. He normally doesn’t find out Lauren’s doing something foolish until after the fact, now.
27. How far would each go to protect the other?
Oh they���re very protective, Mark used to get involved with Lauren’s fights a lot in high school. (She was always gettin into trouble.) I don’t think Nate really gets into situations like that, but in general he’s protective of him, yeah. (and that extends to Izzy, too.. I know this is about the sibs but this is definitely a situation where he treats her like family. He’s just ! A protective older brother all around, for everyone.)
Lauren,, being a werewolf and undoubtedly the strongest of them all now,,,, could do some damage if she needed to and she wouldn’t hesitate if it was to protect her siblings.
Nate’s a lotta bark and no bite, to be honest, so he wouldn’t get in as many fights like they would. But, he’s passionate and wants to protec them too if he can!
30. How far would each person follow the other? Would they trust them enough to commit crime because the other asked them to?
Uhh, pretty far, especially the twins. They have a lot of trust for each other and yeah I could see that involving a crime if it was completely necessary. At the very least, hiding a crime that the other one did..
Mark: We need to fuck someone’s shit up? I’ll fuck someone’s shit up.Lauren: Listen, I’m not saying that. All I’m saying is I know where to find some very sharp teeth and some very secluded woods.Nate: I draw the line at petty theft and arson.
Siiince Nate’s our lil crime boy in the runaway AU though, I’ll expand a lil more on that scenario since it’s more tangible? I think they’d both get involved immediately if he asked/said he was in some kind of trouble. Kind of a heat of the moment ofc I gotta help my lil bro out of a bad situation. But I don’t think he does that. I think he just disappears suddenly for a while and bc of that.. Well, they’d wanna do some detective work to figure out what happened to him,, but might not jump to help him as immediately when he does finally show back up again. They were incredibly worried for him and now that he’s back, they’re mad at him for making them so scared!! ‘You could’ve called a long time ago!’ >:(
Not to say they wouldn’t help him at all, he would just need to do a lot more explaining for either of them to get on board. That being said if the newly blonde and tattooed Nathan showed up at either of their houses with some equally disguised boyfriends then they wouldn’t hesitate to let them hide out n crash there.
31. If one wronged the other badly, would the other forgive them easily?
Mark forgives kinda easily? He’d be upset initially but eventually, he’d rather keep his relationships in tact than hold grudges.
Lauren IS Dramatic and WILL hold grudges, no doubt. Forgiveness might happen eventually, but it’s not easy.
Nate wants to forgive and for sure would try, normally he’d be the first to forgive! But he’s a lil more emotional and if we’re talking badly wronged,, bad feelings and memories would still pop up and he’s not as Over It as he pretends to be. Whatever happened still might hurt him, and he’d also bring previous arguments up even if they weren’t relevant as evidence of maYBE I shouldn’t forgive you this time!! They love their baby brother but they push him around sometimes, sometimes its ‘just teasing’ and sometimes it’s not, and I feel like if they did something that was seriously that bad, he’d start thinking about EVERYthing before telling himself, how much am I gonna put up with.
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selfpityandporn · 6 years
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Rant- Okay, #1, fuck you. You started a fight and now like everything you’ve been a cunt about is fucking coming back and pissing me off. But lets just keep to I dunno, this week.
I literally had to fight both of you, "adults" just to take OUR cat to the vet, cause your fucking cheap and in goddamn denial, thats right GODDAMN, I can say that, because fuck you I can. I don't care if it uses gods name in vain, since when did you give a shit about god any way, considering the absolute shit storm you've given me for the last 4 years about going to church you didn't know anything about.
I fight just to get this cat to vet, long story short she's deathly sick. And I'm not complaining about taking care of her, I'm happy too, I will wipe her ass everyday long as she gets to be here, cause I love her and she's family. But the fact that I literally have to fight you just to get her fucking .70 food is GODDAMN ridiculous, god forbid her flea or ear mite medicine to keep her from scratching the blood out of herself. But I'm dollering you to death, and I'm a selfish peice of shit, excuse the fucking shit outta me.
Also, thanks for literally not helping me with her at FUCKING ALL. Like I said, I'm just happy she's alive, but honestly you wanna talk about how much you love her, and care about her, but you wont help me get the right food, and can't even take care of her. Our kitty was so sick she couldn't even move, so she had to be carried. I didn't want to take her to my room, because theres fucking shit and insulation everywhere from our shower breaking and dad still not cleaning up or fixing it, and I can't clean it up without getting bitched out. But god forbid we put her in your room, really? It's clean, your rooms not as hot, and you have a place to put her, but your terrified she's gonna pee or something, really? Your lucky she's fucking alive, I got pissed on taking her to the vet. Why, BECAUSE SHES SICK AND CANT HELP IT. I didn't get mad, I cleaned it up LIKE A FUCKING ADULT. You won't help me carry her when I'm trying to get her food, you don't want her in the living room. I could go on and on, you get the idea, I'm happy my cats alive, but fuck you for not helping me help her. SHE NEEDS US, your dropping the goddamn ball.
Lets get to today, the snapper of this, cause honestly this HAS SO MUCH SHIT, from you calling me a whore, accusing me of shit, not teaching me how to drive, cussing me out, not coming to my school stuff, thats might be a fucking tenth of all the shit that has been frustrating me. BECAUSE YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE AN ADULT, AND A PARENT, YOUR SUPPOSED TO HELP ME BUT INSTEAD YOU HAVE YOUR HEAD STUCK UP YOUR ASS.
We had our little family trip today, it was going so well. Till we were almost home, everyones in the car. Like usual you and dad are smoking like fucking trains and I can't fucking breathe, god forbid I roll down my window to satisfy MY HUMAN FUCKING NEED FOR OXYGEN. That wasn't the biggest issue, no the biggest issue is when you decided to fun your fucking mouth cussing me. Make such a huge fucking deal out of literally nothing. And when I say big deal, I mean on and on and on for 30 goddamn minutes. And any time it got quiet, YOU KEPT FUCKING YAPPING. I literally put my ear buds in, and ignored you. I didn't keep arguing, till you were LITERALLY SCREAMING SO LOUD I COULD HEAR YOU OVER MY ROARING TRAP MUSIC. Then I retaliate, you tell me to just shut the fuck up, the conversations over. FUCK YOU, I STOPPED TALKING 30 GODDAMN MINUTES AGO, YOUR THE DUMB FUCK THAT KEEPS GODDAMN TALKING.
And then, you pissed me off. Lets jump to last week. I got my first credit card, why? Because my laptop broke, I needed another for my online classes, we as a family were too broke to buy it. I understand that, I took it into my own hands. Then, you tried to start a fight, cause I didn't wanna go an extra 200+ into debt getting my little brother, WHO IS LITERALLY 8 a fucking laptop. You started a fight, because I refused to buy and 8 year old, a laptop, on my credit. Which oh by the way I know you would have never payed me back for, because your you and I've learned this lesson literally a dozen times, but your my mom so I keep letting you borrow my christmas money (I might get like, $60 each year, which is all I get from my family members, she "borrows" Then, will get her taxes, blow them and not pay me back, and guilt trip me about literally buying me stuff for my birthday at tax time, anyways) You tried to start a fight over that, then literally tried to put words in my mouth, saying I said I'd get him one. No, I didn't. I said I wish I could, I want him to learn how to type, but my line of credit is only $500, my laptop it's self was $250, the rest I was trying to save for emergencies, cause I knew we were fucking broke.
Now, I'm not on a rabbit trail, this ties in I promise. The day I got my laptop, we had went in Walmart to look, you said you were gonna get a handful of groceries while I looked, alright. I didn't get a laptop there, we go to leave. You ask me to pay for the groceries. I told you I didn't want to on credit, but how much is it? "Oh only like $20, I only got a few." Checked out, it was like $40. I got it anyways, and just asked that when you had the money, (She's literally getting a 1000+ check for her 401k in like, a week) if you could give me some for the upcoming comic con. (Comic con is a big deal for me, I cosplay, I go with my best friend and her family, I literally look forward to it all year. Most of the time I go, I'm usually broke, except for the last few cause I had a job until about a month before all this, whole other rant, anyways) So I was like cool, it sucks I'm another 40$ in the hole, but she knows how much con means to me, she'll give me it back. Then, I get my laptop. Back to the 8yr old brother thing, he literally has broken like 5+ tablets, my tv, and 3 phones alright. He gets mad, will throw them, scream curse words at them. It's ridiculous, literally didn't want to throw away $200+ I DIDNT HAVE on a brat who was gonna destroy it, along with my parents not knowing how to use it, neither does he so they expect me to fix LITERALLY everything, which is so annoying, cause then, he breaks it, its somehow on me. Anyways.
I was nice enough to lay away the laptop for you, another $30 I didn't have, but it got you off my fucking back. You also said you'd give me that back for con. I just wanna put in here, that when I got my job and actually had hours, I took my family out to dinner every paycheck, bought them stuff. Genuinely tried to not be selfish, Literally I think the only big thing I bought myself was my cosplay that I had wanted for like, years. But then my hours got cut, I was working literally 5 hours a week. I might have made $30-$40 for the majority of my employment, an with that I iterally saved up to take my friend out for her birthday and buy myself bedsheets, and still tried to take us out to eat, cause we got to do it as a family. But during this she was literally acting like, I had to pay for anything and everything. I needed to go to town for school, "You got gas money?" I asked for a few dollers so I could eat at work/before works, "Can't you buy it yourself?" Like, I would have HAPPILY if I had it, but I didn't, and your literally my mom, can you not drive me to school? Help me buy lunch, like WTfff?
And, today. Oh today, after you cussed and cussed and fucking cussed, I put my earbuds in and leave it alone, I DIDN"T SAY ANYTHING BACK, even though I know your still talking trash. I pause my musics just so I can hear you.
"Just wait till the next time you need something from me! Just fucking wait, and you can forget about your goddamn comic con money, go get a fucking job!."....................................................
I'm sorry, excuse me? Did I just fucking hear that correctly? See, I'm not a bad person, I don't believe so. But I fucking mentally snapped. I literally spent hours the other week helping her find another job, putting in her application. I can't get a job, because in the past fucking year and half she hasn't taken, and no exageration, more than 20 minutes to try to teach me how to drive, and not not only are you refusing to give me to the money you deadass owe me. But I. I need to get. A . God. Damn. Job.???????
At first, I handled it like a child, a child who loves their mother. "I don't care, I'll have fun without a fucking dime to my name." Then, my ass adulted, silently, excuse me. Excuse me, I don't think I heard that correctly, you not only are tryna sit there and cuss me, TELL ME TO GET A JOB, and, oh and, try to refuse the money you took from me?
I really, ya know, I really don't think thats gonna work. Cause see here, asshat, I have all your credit card info, all your social shit cause you don't know how to do a fucking job application, and, oh and, a cold GODDAMN shoulder. So heres how this is gonna work darlin, the day of con will come, and you will either give me my money (I didn't even ask for the full $70 btw, I said maybe like $40.) But you will either now give me all $70, or I will slip your card from your wallet, while your in your smokin drunken stooper, and frankly, cruelly, hold it fucking hostage till you #1Give me my fucking money, and #2 Fucking apologize, and admit you tried to do me so goddamn shitty. And if I don't think that apology is good enough, I'll take my money on my own and you will have disappointed me. I gave so many chances for redemption, and I still am.
But honestly this is prolly my fucking snapping point cause you have insulted me and frustrated me enough. I am 18, I am trying to adult, with no help from you, if anything more fight. Between finishing my senior year by my fucking self, to the stupid job shit, to omg, all the college shit she was supposed to help me with that I had to do on my own, to our poor cat which I'm trying to nurse off the fucking death bed single handedly, to literally not being able to get a job because of you, to you now more than likely ruining my credit, cussing me out, and just being an absolute pain in my goddamn ass along with every fucking thing else I am having to do on my own.
So, excuse me, fuck you. Get the fuck out of my way. You will NOT stand between me and the things I have earned and strive to get. In fact, no one will. You wanna be fucking petty, and fucking rude? Don't get made at me for winning a game you goddamn started :) K, thanks.
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