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#he knows very well it isn't the only thing he's putting out there
hrhmimieucliffe · 2 days
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NSFW Alphabet with Doctor Zayne - ❄️
Minors DNI (Obviously)
Wanted to do this because I've never done an NSFW Alphabet before. Hope my fellow Zayne stans see my vision and agree with me though.
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after the act) - Very affectionate and attentive. He would clean you up, help you relax, maybe even give you a massage if he went too hard. 🤫
B = Body part (favourite body part their own or their lovers) - He couldn't just choose one spot. He loves to kiss the palms of your hands when you touch and grab at his face whilst he's thrusting into you slowly and deeply. He loves to place gentle and loving kisses on your neck. He loves to run his hands all over your body, specifically your torso, grabbing fistfuls of your breast gently.
C = Cum (anything that has to do with it) - He doesn't really like the mess, so he'll be sure to clean it up as soon as possible. He'll also advise you to use the toilet, as that's what you're supposed to do after sex, then maybe you can have a shower... maybe he'd join you.
D = Dirty secret (Pretty self-explanatory) - He may act indifferent, but he secretly loves watching you walk and strut around in lingerie when you're in the bedroom. He slowly strips it off you with care, as he doesn't want to ruin it of course. He loves to see you in it, and treats it with care. His favourite part is definitely slowly taking it off you and revealing every inch of your perfect body. He definitely also loves it when you tease him in different ways.
E = Experience (do they know what they’re doing) - Come on now...🧍🏾‍♀️Though it isn't his area of expertise, I'd say as a Doctor in general, he might know a thing or two about stimulation. Even if he isn't experienced. 🤫
F = Favorite position - (Idk many positions so I'll just go by something I do know though I don't know the name of it 😭) I think Zayne would like an intimate position, such as a spooning position. I think him having you safe and secure in his arms, in a position where he can watch your facial expressions change, as seeing your different pleasured expressions gets him off. He likes to be close to you.
G = Getting Off (What gets them off?) - I think Zayne is the kind of man that could sit down and watch you intently as you give him a little show. A lapdance, a strip tease, anything like that. But even moreso, I think he would love it when you possibly take charge every once in a while. He secretly likes it when you make him ask nicely for you to let him finish🤫
H = Hair (grooming habits) - He is definitely well-groomed, no doubt about it.
I = Intimacy (in the moment romantic or rough/dirty) - Definitely romantic. He likes to make love. Slow, sensual, passionate, intimate, and gentle. He is a gentle dom in my opinion, but he doesn't mind you being on top every once in a while. He could indulge in something rougher if you ask, but I don't really think he'd put his all into it - afraid of hurting you of course.
J = Jack off (do they masturbate and how often) - I think he wouldn't do it often, as he's way too busy with work. But perhaps on a day off he'll get pent up and decide to rub one out. I'm sure he'd be thinking of you when he does 🤫
K = Kink (kinks what they like possibly unusual) - I don't think he has many kinks to be honest. Perhaps brat tamer, or primal (hunter). No daddy or master kink over here 🤫 Maybe he secretly likes to see you all tied up for him, though as long as its not hurting too much. I think perhaps he could have a size difference kink. After all, he'd love watching and witnessing how well you take him every time. Definitely a gentle dom.
L = Location (where they like to get it on) - He definitely would prefer if its not in public. He likes to be somewhere private where its just the two of you. Where no one can disturb you. Your body is his temple and he wants to be the only one to see it. It goes both ways, though.
M = Motivation (things that makes them tick/turn ons) - When you push him onto the bed and straddle him, 100%. When you visit him whilst he's working just to tease him and he has to resist the urge to give in. When you "accidentally" drop something and bend over. When you grind into him as you sit on top of him. When you slowly slide and drag your hands under his clothes, caressing that sculpted body of his, circling his nipple with your finger. It drives him insane. When you wear his favourite outfit just to rile him up.
N = No (turnoffs or absolutely won’t do) - Hair pulling (at least too hard), Spanking (Again, not too hard if he DOES do it), anything too kinky in general or like proper BDSM.
O = Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are) - He definitely loves to receive. He loves to sit back and watch you as you take him into your throat. He'll let out small soft grunts and groans every now and then, but he'd obviously be holding back. Maybe he'll whisper a few praises and stroke your hair. But, he also thinks it's better to give than recieve. Watching your face contort in pleasure, gripping at the sheets, arching your back, your body trembling, those adorable moans, the way you whisper his name. He'd be making sure your needs come before his. You're his favourite patient, and a good Doctor takes GOOD care of his patients needs before his own. 🤫
P = Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed) - Definitely nice and slow, but he'd pick up the pace the faster he gets to bursting and maybe be a little rough if you asked him to be.
Q = Quickie - I think quickies would be beneficial depending on when. Like you could tease him in the morning before he has to go work and he'd have no choice but to give in and take care of you when you beg him to and give him those big doe eyes. Maybe if it's late and you're in the office, he'd relieve some quick stress with you. Maybe he'd even let you suck him off under his desk whilst he's working (after you got him riled up on purpose, of course)
R = Risk (do they like to try new things) - I think he'd be open to new things, but mostly depending on how you feel about them.
S = Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts) - Maximum 3 rounds, just because he's a workaholic, and so he couldn't go for too long as he'd need to get his rest in for work the next day. But he always makes it up to you. When he has a day off, he'd go as much as you want him to.
T = Toys (are they game for using sex toys on themselves or lovers) - I think he wouldn't mind using one on you. His favourite would definitely be a remote controlled vibrator that he can activate at any time. You'd better hope you're not out hunting wanderers or with another person when he gets bored in his office and decides to activate it for fun.
U = Unfair (how do they tease or do they enjoy suspense themselves) - Oh, I think he wouldn't definitely be the type to make you whine and beg, edging you and watching you come apart as you plead for him to let you cum when he's two or three fingers deep inside you. Maybe he won't give in and you'll have to keep begging. Maybe he'll hold you still so that you don't seek any other stimulation to finish yourself off.
V = Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk) - Always low. Quiet. Hushed. Whispered. He won't moan too loudly, he'd probably hold it back or release it in an almost agonised growl and grunt. He likes to praise you, whether you're receiving or giving the pleasure. He would probably check on you whilst he was doing it to you to make sure he's not too rough or anything.
W = Wild card (random sincannon of any sort) - I think he'd definitely use his evol during sex at least one time 🤫 When it gets too hot, I'm sure a little ice would definitely help👩🏾‍🦯
X = X-ray (what’s down below in dem pants) - Girl...😏😩 he is packing of course. A good 5-6 inches.
Y = Yearning (sexdrive level) - It's not always high, but it certainly is when you tease him. Sometimes it'll go up just looking at you, or thinking about you.
Z = Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after) - He'll only sleep once he knows you're okay and all your needs have been taken care of. He'll watch you fall asleep in his arms.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
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Am I right or no, girlies?
(If you saw any spelling mistakes, no you didn't)
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jsprnt · 3 days
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Americano PT. 5 | Jude Bellingham x Reader
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What happens if two individuals who absolutely despise each other are forced to interact after unforeseen events occur?
A/N: pff, this was a long one, enjoy babes. A heads up in advance, I’ll be taking a break in the first week of April due to my exams 🫶
W/C: 4.558
part four
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"Come in here and bring your laundry hamper!"
"Just a second, dad!"
I jump out of bed, leaving my phone on the other end of it, and grab the pink hamper. I hold onto the handles tightly as I make my way out of my room.
I see him standing over the washing machine in the laundry room. I enter quickly, the both of us starting to sort out the dirty clothes and putting them in the machine accordingly.
"Did you finish packing?" My dad asks, glancing at me before grabbing the laundry detergent and fabric softener out of the cabinet above me.
"Yeah, just a couple basic things. It's like a 2-3 day trip."
He pours the blue liquid into the cap, checking the measurements before pouring it into the designated compartment. Doing the same thing with the fabric softener.
"Really? No fancy dress or anything?"
I look up from the washing machine, a sheepish smile forming on my face. I watch him shake his head in disbelief, a smile on his face as he turns the machine on.
"When I sent you abroad- I thought your aunt would raise you exactly like I would. But I forgot she probably raised you to love dressing up like her. You know, she used to terrorize me in my own room growing up, only because I had bigger windows and thus better lighting for when she did her makeup.." He shakes his head, chuckle leaving him as he reminisces.
I laugh at him, the smile on my face bigger now.
"I think packing something proper is very important. It worked out pretty well last Saturday when we went for dessert in Girona."
"Just stay safe when going out. It's a dangerous world, honey." He says, putting his hand on my shoulder.
I purse my lips at his words, remembering what had happened just a couple nights ago. He didn't know about the entire debacle, but since it was already dealt with, I didn't see a reason to bring it up.
"When are you getting up?"
"Not super early, like around eight? The match isn't until Tuesday, so no early flight."
"You know, it's almost twelve, right? Go to bed already, and don't go on your phone." He tuts, scolding me and pushing me towards my room.
"Alright, I'll go to bed."
"Goodnight, I love you." He says, kissing my forehead before he makes his way down the stairs.
"Love you too!" I shout as I watch him walk away while I stand in front of my bedroom door. The silence of the house surrounding me when I’m left alone.
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The team had finally wrapped up training for the day. We had arrived in Napels that morning, and they had trained hard until late in the afternoon.
This left us with some free time for the rest of the day, until we had to prepare for the match tomorrow.
"You've been doing your makeup for about 40 minutes now." I hear Luis complain, lying flat on his back on top of my bed.
"I could be meeting my future Italian husband out there! Come on, let me look cute for tonight."
I darken up my eye makeup, coloring my waterline with a black pencil to contrast my white dress.
I then drench my face in setting spray, fanning it dry with a random brochure, I found on the nightstand.
"Besides, you're wrinkling your clothes, stand up. I can't have you looking bummy! What if you find yourself a pretty lady?" I wink, struggling to hold back a laugh at the unimpressed expression he sends me.
I finally stand up from the chair, smoothing down my dress in front of the mirror, and adjust the slit a little.
"We can go now!"
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"Are you drinking?"
"No, not feeling it tonight." I mutter, eyeing the delicious-sounding food on the menu.
I look up, watching Luis flip through the menu.
"I'm going to order a pizza."
"Why pizza?" He asks, looking at me.
"We are practically in the birthplace of pizza. Are you judging me?" I ask, raising a brow at him.
"Just get it, I'm not judging you.." He raises his hands as if to surrender.
"You're so mean when you're hungry." He mumbles, closing his menu.
"Just appreciate the fact that I dragged you here. Look at how beautiful the view is.
I turn, admiring the view behind the glass panels of the restaurant. The Vesuvius mountain and the water are absolutely breathtaking, especially right now during sunset.
He sighs at me in agreement, looking around to find a waiter for us to finally order our food.
I watch him order for the both of us, getting distracted by the view, and turn towards him when the waiter leaves.
"If you get hammered, I'll leave you here.."
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"So, now you want to find an Italian girlfriend?" I ask Luis bewildered, watching him walk - no stumble in front of me.
The drinks he ordered were good, so good he felt inclined to ordered multiple of them. I didn't keep count, but he definitely had more than his limit, which made him the drunk mess he was right now.
"Of course, you're my best friend. We should each find a person to marry!" He slurs, walking towards the docks.
I sigh deeply, looking down at my heels, before jogging up to him, clutching onto his shirt tightly.
"You're going to fall into the water!" I shout, trying to hold him back from the edge, but he shouts in protest.
"It's fine, maybe one of these hot people will save me from drowning."
Oh my god
I look up to where he's pointing, seeing a group of people on an expensive-looking catamaran. I'm way too distracted to realize my grip on Luis has loosened, and watch him leave. I see him greet the partying people loudly. I close my eyes in embarrassment, wanting to jump into the water out of shame.
Who even parties on a random Monday evening?
I surprisingly hear someone shout something in what sounds like Italian. I turn my head, eyes searching as I turn my attention to the person.
My eyes meet the eyes of a tall, brown-eyed, beautifully sun-kissed man. His blue linen shirt halfway unbuttoned.
He looked like, and definitely is trouble.
I hear him say something again, and my eyes widen when they go back to Luis, who looks like he's having the time of his life with two girls.
"English?" I hear the beautiful stranger ask.
I nod, watching him walk towards the dock and then, interestingly enough, reach for my hand.
I would never leave Luis alone on this boat full of strangers. Therefore, I reluctantly grab the guy's hand as he pulls me onto the boat.
"Hi?" I greet, raising a brow. Quickly smoothing my dress down.
"Hello, and your name is?" He asks, eyes roaming up and down my body, definitely checking me out. The Aussie accent practically melting me on the spot, making it difficult for my jaw to stay closed.
He was the definition of trouble.
But I needed to get my mess of a friend off this damn boat and leave.
"y/n, yours?" I ask, pretending to be more interested than I am, sneakily glancing at Luis.
"I'm Chris. You're not from here, are you?"
Obviously not
"No, I'm actually from Valencia."
A white lie, he didn't have to know anything about me.
"Valencia, Spain? What are you and your friend doing here?"
"Visiting, for fun." I lie again, giving him a smile.
"Really? Having fun so far?" He smiles, his pearly white teeth blinding me.
"Yeah, a lot of fun." I reply, my brows raising in fake interest.
I watch him chuckle, his plump lips curling up. His arm going up to run a hand through his blonde locks.
"Care for a drink, then?"
As beautiful as this man was, I wasn't naive enough to accept a drink from him. Especially, since we were in a totally different country.
"I'm fine, actually. I'm leaving tomorrow, so I'm trying to not drink as much."
"Oh, you probably came to watch the Champions League game then?"
Got me, kind of.
I immediately pull a sour face, pretending to be disgusted.
"Of course not, I have better things to do than attend a Real Madrid match. If it wasn't for Valencia, I'd be for Barcelona anyway.."
That one physically hurt to say.
"Oh- don't get mad now." He teases, putting his hands up, his smile getting wider.
I had to leave hastily, at least before this man got me into his bed.
"You're fine. I'm just trying to get my friend and leave. You alright with that?"
"Let me get your number first. Don't think I'll forget you after tonight." He says, handing me his phone.
I was curving the man left and right, and he still wanted my number?
"I don't really give out my number. But I can give you my Instagram handle?"
"That's fine." He says, clicking on his Instagram.
I watch his screen, my eyes accidentally catching the number of girls on his explore page.
No way, this man was looking for something serious.
"Oh, I'll type it in. If that's alright?" I say, reaching for his phone. He nods, handing me the device.
I quickly type in my username, pressing follow.
To snoop a little further, I go back to the explore page, seeing more ass and boobs than I had prepared for. Pretending to be unfazed as I clear the Instagram tab and hand his phone back to him.
I mean, their bodies were amazing, but why the hell was he following them?
"That's it. Here you go. My phone is dead, so I'll talk to you later?" I say, fidgeting with my handbag. My social battery was dying even faster than normal tonight. 
I watch him nod, his eyes on me, as I immediately make my way to Luis, who's now sitting with a random girl.
"Hi, sorry to interrupt, but we have to leave."
I grab onto Luis' arm, using all my strength to get him up. Noticing the amount of shot glasses and empty beer bottles in front of them.
How the hell did he manage to do that so fast?
Idiot.
"Wait, do you want his Instagram?" I ask the girl. She hesitates before nodding looking at us confused.
"Okay, well, let me spell it for you."
I spell his username quickly, turning away.
"Yes, that's it. We're not a thing, by the way- he's my brother. Bye!"
Another lie, but maybe it would help him in the long run.
"Let's go, come on." I groan, dragging Luis back to the hotel.
It was doable until he started leaning his body on me, making me slump partially. My heels beginning to hurt my feet more than ever.
After a good ten minutes of struggling, we finally enter the elevator of the hotel, his body weight starts to pile on me. Arriving at our correct floor I drag him out, a huge sigh of relief leaving my lips as I recognize some of our Real Madrid players.
"Help." I mumble, watching some of them recognize the fact that I was half-suffocating.
I watch Antonio, Aurélien, and Jude, of all people, walk towards us, getting drunk and passed out Luis off of me.
"Thank you." I sigh, fixing myself, watching Antonio comically throw Luis onto one of the seats there.
"What happened to him?" I hear Brahim say as I try to catch my breath and I readjust my grip on my bag.
"Long story."
"Let's put him to bed first." Antonio says, making me nod. All of our eyes moving to a passed-out Luis.
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"So, he got into a random boat?" Federico asks, looking at me.
I nod, trying to hold back a laugh while I drink my water. The cardigan I had retrieved from my room keeping me warm as we sat in the sky lounge.
"I would've partied." I look up at Cama, shaking my head.
"They were strangers, come on! But- one guy did approach me." I say, sending him a smug look.
"So you had some fun!"
"Look, he was cute. He offered me a drink, but I refused."
"That's it? Come on..”
"Why are you all up in my business?" I joke, being half-serious, hearing some of them laugh.
I finish my cup of water, beginning to stand up from my seat.
"It's getting late, I'm going up to my room. Don’t make it late, you guys need to rest well!" I say, waving after they send me off with kind words.
I press the elevator button, crossing my arms as I wait for it to arrive. The doors open a few seconds later, and I step in. I raise my head in surprise when I see an arm hold the doors open. Surprise turns into irritation when I notice Jude step in.
"Why did you follow me?" I ask, playing with the clasp on my bag.
"You know, not everything is about you." He mutters, a fed-up expression on his face. I sigh, closing my eyes in impatience, as I lean against the elevator wall.
The elevator makes a noise, and I check the floor number, getting out, hearing him follow me.
I start rummaging through my handbag for my room-key. Finally, fishing it out as we walk up to our respective rooms.
I arrive at my door, hearing Jude walk up to his own, his room interestingly enough being across from mine.
I go to scan my card but freeze, realizing my door is open by a small sliver.
"Why is my door open?" I mumble to myself, trying to subdue my instant panic.
"What?" I hear, seeing Jude walk up to me from the corner of my eye. His eyes darting in between me and the door.
"You left it open, probably." He responds, not an ounce of concern in his voice.
"You think?"
"Yeah, since you're so good with doors-"
"Okay, stop right there." I mutter, pushing the door open further. I flick the light on, looking around cautiously.
I hear him scoff at my behavior, and I turn around to look at him.
"Can you check the room?" I ask, trying to sound as nice as possible.
"No." He deadpans, giving me a bored look.
I hold back a string of cuss words, stepping into the room as he stands at the doorway.
"Stay here at least, before I get murdered."
"Would be a sight." He mutters, voice laced with humor. Though, I found it difficult to see this situation as funny.
"You're not funny. Are you aware of that?" I ask, punching into the curtains to check if anyone's hiding behind them.
"Find anything, detective?"
"Shut up." I whisper, going to open the bathroom door, hesitating for a moment.
Adrenaline starts pumping through my veins. I try to take deep breaths to prepare for a fight.
"What if someone's actually here?" I whisper, my eyes wide, as I turn to look at Jude.
I watch his expression harden, his jaw tensing as he looks at me.
"What do you mean?!" I hear Jude whisper back. His voice is hushed and more low than usual.
I take off both of my heels, ready to bash the possible intruder’s head in with my heels.
"Call security." I whisper, preparing to fight. I watch him take out his phone, before he raises his head again. His expression darkens for a moment before it changes into something- else...
"What are you doing, idiot? Come here." He says, and I can almost make out a vein popping out of his forehead.
All of the sudden, he makes his way over to me, grabbing my wrist and dragging me out of my room. Shutting the heavy door behind me, his hands coming up to my shoulders.
"What is wrong with you? You don't even know if they're with a weapon or anything!" He shouts in a hushed voice, his Brum accent more prominent than ever.
I continue staring at him, my lips parting in realization.
Damn, I was such a shallow thinker in times of crisis.
My mind turns blank, not acknowledging Jude's presence anymore. I can only hear him sigh and mumble something as security from both the club and hotel arrive at my room.
"Could you take her somewhere else, sir?” I hear someone say, feeling my wrist being pulled abruptly by Jude.
I follow him blindly, but I try to look back at my room. Wanting to see if someone would actually appear out of my room.
"Don't look." I hear, looking in front of me again as I’m brought into the hotel room across from mine. Nicer and bigger, definitely his.
"Sit down." He orders, pulling my wrist again and making me sit on one of the cushioned chairs.
I oblige without protest, too dazed to react in a snarky way. The silence in the room feels like hours when only being about ten minutes. It is finally cut off as Jude's phone starts ringing loudly.
I hear him speak for a few minutes before he hangs up. I watch him walk towards me as he sits in the chair next to me.
"No one was there, they checked the cameras as well. You left the door open."
I cringe, realizing my own initial mistake. A shudder runs through me as he explains.
"Oh, great!" I mumble sarcastically, feeling embarrassed, fidgeting with the fabric of my dress. Only now realizing I was barefoot, my heels probably fell out of my grasp when he pulled me out of the room.
I get up when he finishes explaining, walking up to the door. Pulling my soft cardigan closer to soothe myself.
"Where are you going?" I hear Jude ask. I turn and look back at him.
"Back to my room." I say, suddenly feeling the day's exhaustion take effect. My vision becoming blurry as I feel an ache make its way to my head.
This day alone probably took five years off my lifespan.
I hear him sigh as he walks up to me. Feeling him put his hand on my right shoulder.
"What?" I ask, looking him up and down. Trying to shrug his hand off of my shoulder.
I watch his jaw tense again, his grip on my shoulder getting tighter, though, not getting to the point of hurting.
I open my mouth to speak again, as he doesn't bother to answer my question. Unfortunately, I’m stopped by a sharp pain shooting through my head.
I groan in pain, placing my hands on my temples as I squeeze my eyes shut.
"What's wrong?" I hear him whisper, his other hand making its way to my left shoulder.
"I'm fine..." I dismiss, taking his hands off my shoulders. I reach for the door handle, pulling it down and stepping out of the room.
I tap my card against the sensor hurriedly and open my door, turning to see his door across the hallway already shut.
"Doesn't even care to watch me go inside." I mutter, ridding myself of my clothes and taking a much-needed shower. Trying to wash off all my stress and embarrassment.
When I'm done, I make a beeline to my bed, closing my eyes and forcing myself to sleep. I shift and turn, groaning in frustration as I turn my pillow around for the nth time.
It's like my sleep was robbed of me within minutes. My thoughts keeping me up. I check the time, realizing it was almost two in the morning.
I begin getting fully paranoid, my stupid brain making up the craziest scenarios imaginable.
I bury my face deeper into my pillow, forcing my brain to shut up. Finally, managing to fall asleep, too tired to keep my anxious walls up.
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"You look like a truck ran you over."
"Shut up." I snarl replying to Jude. Trying to ignore him further as I continue eating my food, Luis sitting across from me at the breakfast buffet.
I had gotten maybe five hours of sleep. My three layers of concealer weren’t doing its job today. It had creased within minutes of application.
I roll my eyes as he sits at the table next to us, probably to annoy me further.
“Someone get this weirdo away from me..” I say loudly, closing my eyes in prayer.
I hear Jude scoff, following it up with a laugh.
"Were you born insufferable, or do you practice in the mirror before going to bed?" I ask, poking at my food.
I hear him chuckle again, which makes my blood boil even more. I glance at Luis, seeing a grin forming on his face.
"You too?"
I had told him everything that had happened last night, him feeling embarrassed but finding it hilarious at the same time.
He did promise he'd make it up to me.
"Don't forget how I dragged your ass from the dock to the hotel. I could've easily left you there."
I threaten, looking at Luis as I shove another spoonful of food in my mouth.
I see Jude open his mouth, but I stop him with a hand as my phone rings. My dad calling me right at the perfect moment.
"Oops, sorry, too busy for whatever you want to say."
I realize how immature I sound, but I digress. I get up and answer the call. Chatting to my dad about the past few days.
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I signal for Luis to stop filming, patting his back to commend him for his hard work after the final whistle is blown. A nice 3-2 putting us on top of the table.
"They played really well."
I hum, posting the last social media post and turning to him.
"Right, if they keep playing like this, we'll definitely end up at the top of table C for sure."
"We'll go far. That's without question."
We make our way inside, trying to rush to get inside on time.
"Hugo is saying to interview both Frederico and Jude." I mutter, rereading the text message.
"That's fine, let's just wait here until they're ready." He says, both of us waiting in front of the changing room as they pile inside. Tired expressions on all of their faces.
"By the way, have you seen this one guy that's working here? He's so cute for you." I hear Luis say, looking up at him confused.
"Which one?" I ask, fidgeting with the cable of the camera.
"I'll show you when I see him." He says, and I give him a look.
"He better be cute, since you're making me wait."
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"Alright, that's it." I announce, looking at Jude. Finally wrapping up his interview.
"Thank you." He mutters, with less attitude this time. Probably way too tired to have a petty fight with me. I wasn't disappointed with that, to be honest. I couldn't stand speaking to him anymore.
"See you on the bus, man." I hear Jude say, giving Luis a handshake as he begins walking away. My eyes follow him, piercing into his back.
"See, that's the guy I was talking about." I hear Luis say, my head snapping towards the direction he was looking at.
"Which one-" I begin, shamelessly looking at the guy.
"What? No, are you serious?" I ask, appalled by the person he’s shipping me with.
"Yeah, he's cute for you." He mutters, giving me a smirk.
"You might be hungover still. Let's just get into the bus, please."
We pack our equipment up, starting to walk towards the team buses. Successfully helping fellow staff with the multiple suitcases and bags and stepping up into the vehicle.
We greet the players we make eye contact with, the both of us walking along the occupied seats until we finally find two empty ones next to each other.
"I'm tired..." I mumble, leaning my back against the seat, closing my eyes as I get comfortable. Leaving my phone on my lap.
"I can see that." I hear Luis reply, and I open one of my eyes to give him an offended look.
"How sweet of you." I reply, trying to take a quick fifteen-minute nap. Running around for more than two hours with five hours of sleep was not for the weak.
I was part of the weak.
I hear the sound of a notification, surprised it could be heard through all of the chatter and banter of everyone in the bus.
"Was that your phone?" I ask, leaning my head against the window.
"No, it was yours." Luis answers.
"Can you read it for me? You know my password."
I feel my phone being removed from my lap, a second of silence from Luis before he starts laughing uncontrollably.
"What?" I ask, getting curious.
What could be that funny?
"It's a DM from a Chris on Instagram."
"Who the fuck is Chris?" I ask, finally opening my eyes to take my phone back. My eyes roaming around the screen, reading a short message with a 'view once’ photo.
"Thought you repped Valencia?"
I read the message out loud, looking back at Luis, confused. Then I look at the profile picture.
"Oh my god! It's the guys from the boat!" I shout, embarrassed when I realize I was being louder than necessary.
"The one you talked about?"
"Yeah- wait, what do you think the photo is?" I ask, starting to feel squirmy.
"A dick pic." I hear Luis whisper.
"Who got a dick pic?"
I hear someone ask, looking at the row behind me. Jude peeking his head in between our headrests.
"Not you, so mind your own business.." I reply, moving my phone out of his view and returning to my conversation with Luis. Ignoring the daggers he’s sending me with his piercing gaze.
"No way, gross. He looked desperate, but no way."
"Well, click on it."
"No, now I'm scared. Why would you even bring that up?"
"Just squint."
I huff, leaning back against the widow, squinting as I press on the photo.
"Oh-" I exclaim, taking a deep, relieved breath.
Thankfully, it’s not an explicit picture, but a photo of me at the stadium we were just at, prematch to be specific. From the angle, you could tell the photo was taken from the stands.
"Wait- what the fuck? He was there? Ew, why did he take a photo of me?” I say, showing Luis the screen.
I watch his mouth fall open. He reaches over, taking my phone from me and screenshots the photo.
"That's why he sent that message. You lied to him about yourself, right?"
"Of course I did!" I say, snatching the phone from his hand.
"What do I say?" I ask, looking at him with a questioning look.
"Do you even want to speak to him?"
"Well- I'm bored?" I give him a grin, his arm coming to push me.
“I can’t stop you, but you said he looked like trouble, so ignore him..." He advises, squeezing my arm.
I nod at his words, taking them in. I swipe to press the mute button on the chat, and turn my phone off.
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teeny-tiny-revenge · 8 hours
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Came across this in a fic again and I have to vent for a moment here: Ed's hair isn't unclean or not taken care of. Ever. Even at his lowest, in the first two episodes of season two, his hair is light and blows with the wind, it's got perfect waves, there is zero grime in it. Impossible Birds Ed hair has clearly been fairly recently washed, combed out and conditioned. Ed canonically loves soap, and you don't get that hair without owning a comb or brush and frequently working oil into it. He's at sea! The air is salty! It'll dry out your hair, but Ed's hair doesn't ever look dried out. The day he decides to commit suicide he puts his hair up into a lovely bun, with whispy stands framing his face. I have no idea what some people are watching, because Ed taking meticulous care (and most likely also putting pride and love) into his hair is clear, on-screen canon.
Like, if you want to write about how he was neglecting himself in his depression Kraken era? There's plenty there for you on screen as well! He sobs all night, probably sleeps on the floor if he sleeps at all. He doesn't wear his knee brace. He drinks and does drugs (and admits to that being poison to Frenchie!). He's pushing everyone away, he's pushing himself hard into a role that made him passively suicidal even before the breakup depression. He doesn't watch his back during raids At All. There's so much self harm there to address. If you want to, it would probably be plausible to add him not bothering to properly care for any wounds he might obtain during a raid. But he clearly doesn't neglect bathing and hair care. They're probably the only elements of self-care he actually still does during this dark time!
Even rock bottom Ed doesn't neglect his hair. And that says things about him! It's also something I'd love to see actually addressed in fic (will probably write it myself one of these days...): Taking good care of his hair, putting on jewelry, doing his makeup, these are things that seem to bring Ed joy or relief in his darkest moments. Where's my fic about these quiet moments of self-care being a straw he clutches to when everything else is terrible?
I love a good bathing together/doing each other's hair fic. It's intimate and loving! And Stede and Ed are prime material to write a mutual caretaking and bonding over it couple! Ed canonically loves soap and taking care of his hair! And Stede brought an entire fucking bathtub on a ship, the wonderful madman. S1 Stede's hair is always carefully curled, and we know that's not its natural state (it's wavy but not in this manner) from seeing him in S2, away from his certainly plentiful bath and grooming equipment. Stede probably has an hour of daily hair routine! We know he has nice smelling, probably expensive soaps. Where's the fic where they share in this?
There's so much potential! They can show each other their favourite care products! Sometimes they'll work on each other and sometimes not at all! Ed's rich hair oils will make Stede's hair all sticky and weird! Ed will think it's hilarious and adorable, he'll try to ruffle his hair and make it stick up worse and Stede will pout! 🥺 He'll look like this, just with weird spiky hair! One ill-advised day they try putting Stede's curlers in Ed's hair and then they almost can't get them back out because Ed's hair is so long and has lots of natural wave and it'll cling to the curlers and it's awful (they laugh about it afterwards, once Ed has very carefully brushed his hair out again and it no longer pulls at his scalp).
Makeup was a thing done by men and women at the time, especially for aristocrats (as seen in Episode 5), so Stede will know his way around hoity toity makeup, meaning rouges and whites (contained lots of lead, yuck!). Meanwhile Ed does pirate costume makeup for Blackbeard endeavours, that's a whole different thing. And both of these are makeups they don't actually enjoy doing (Stede avoids heavy makeup for the party, and Ed's Kraken makeup is part of his whole Everything Is Awful And I'm Making Myself Feel That look). But we see Ed do nice makeup that seems to be him! On his supposed to be final day on Earth, he cleans away all the Kraken coal, he cleans up his cabin, he gets rid of drugs, booze, Izzy (everything that was harming him), he does up his hair really nice and in a style that's very much Not Blackbeard, and he puts on a gorgeous bit of eyeliner that really brings out his eyes. And now that they're safe and happy together, when Ed decides he wants to look pretty today, not only can Stede lose his marbles over the look, Ed can also show him how to make his own eyes pop like that. They can stand in front of their mirror together, giggling and trying not to poke anyone in the eye.
Like. This is a fancy bathroom items for fancy bathroom items couple. They will bond over their love of bubble baths and nice smelling soaps and soft oils for hair and skin! They will learn each other's routines and how to do them just right for them. Let Stede learn that Ed loves his baths scalding hot (Stede has to wait a while for it to cool before he joins him in the tub because he'll get all pink and lightheaded). Let Ed learn how to put in Stede's curlers for him if Stede wants his hair to look extra fluffy the next day. Let Ed learn to massage Stede's back and Stede learn to massage Ed's knee. There's so much potential for loving caretaking with this ship. The trope doesn't at all require Ed to not know or not want to take care of his hair and hygiene. Fuck's sake.
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I re-read your Fellow Honest study, and one thing to mention is that Riddle is immensely proud of having no one drop out or transfer out of Heartslabyul/NRC, right? His dorm is the only one at full capacity? This means dropping out of NRC isn't that uncommon, whether it's a money issue or a grades issue, and that's more people discarded simply because they couldn't keep up.
[Referencing this analysis!]
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Mmm, that's true 🤔 I wonder how NRC's dropout rates compare to those of other magic schools and regular schools that do not train mages... I can't imagine that NRC has a ton of dropouts though, because otherwise I feel like more dorm leaders and staff would express concern about it? Like if a ton of students were dropping out, it would reflect poorly on their leadership and teaching skills, wouldn't it...? Maybe it's not mentioned because it isn't that relevant to the main story or Riddle in particular is super fixated on it (given how strict he is). At the very least, we know that NRC has a non-zero dropout rate. Even at a school that supposedly has the best and brightest mages-in-training, some will not make the cut.
As cruel as this may sound (sorry, Fellow), it's 100% understandable from a school's perspective why they wouldn't want to keep supporting students who continuously do not succeed and ultimately dismiss them. Many programs irl (especially those in higher education) set standards that students must meet and maintain until graduation if they want to remain in their program. It could harm the school's educational reputation if they do not produce "results".
In some cases, schools that fail to maintain a certain "pass" rate on specialized exams their students take may lose accreditation (an official “quality seal”) for their program(s). For example, irl nursing programs in the U.S. and Canada are put on probation if they have a class of students with an 80% or lower passing score on the NCLEX exam. They are given 2 years to "fix" this low passing rate; if this is not corrected, then the school's accreditation is revoked completely. A loss of accreditation can result in many other negatives, such as less financial aid dispersement and fewer job opportunities (/your diploma not being seen as “legitimate”).
That's unfortunately how it works. Granted, a school shouldn’t spite a student for not being able to keep up with the workload (which sadly may have been the reality for Fellow), but it really is in the institutions’ best interests to drop a student they fear won’t perform well.
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moodymisty · 2 days
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𝕽𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖒𝖇𝖊𝖗 𝕺𝖓𝖑𝖞 𝕸𝖊
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[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]
Part 2 of 5 - Part 1
Author's Note: Part 2! I know it came out kinda fast, but part 3 might take a bit longer since it's a bit more heavy than these first 2 chapters. It will also feature much more of our spooky man than this one has. Either way, I hope you enjoy meeting our stinky little Night Lord.
Summary: A Night Lord becomes interested in you while you stand under the eyes of your Salamander guardian, and you find yourself stuck between two titans.
Relationships: Yandere Salamander/Fem!Reader/Yandere Night Lord
Warnings: Hints of nsfw at points, Yandere, Size differences, Very toxic suffocating relationship(s), Some knight/princess dynamics, Demeaning language, Both these guys have hero complexes, Violence blood and bruises and possibly death to say without spoilers
Word Count: 3446
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You need to eat. 
When Ralkan had told you to stay you’d trusted his judgment; Staying put in your quarters. It wasn’t safe for you on your own, not with Night Lords now prowling around. At least in his eyes. You didn’t have enough information to feel either way about it, though you can't say you have no fear of astartes you don't know.
Even when you first came aboard this ship, coming face to face with astartes for the first time- even as their kind faces smiled and they gave you polite dips of their head and welcomed you aboard- you still felt the heart pounding fear of seeing towering warriors on the line between human and something else.
Floating in the vastness of space beside the Flamewrought, Night Lord ships linger around with an unnerving aura you could feel when looking out any of the large viewports. it almost was like the ships were leering, as ridiculous as such a notion sounds.
There wasn’t much you could do in hidden away in your quarters, however. You could only write so much before you could no longer avoid the growling of your stomach, and the way it aches.
You can just go to the mess hall and get something to eat, and rush back to your quarters. It's not as if you have other options in the matter; He surely hadn't expected you to just starve, or get someone to wait on your hand and foot.
You had your fill of that on Terra. You can get your own food, you aren't a child anymore. And this ship is alive and well, you aren't going to let yourself fear some invisible terror in the dark.
Having your fill of hermitry you get up from your desk chair, leaving the small quarters that have been designated as your own. It has only the basics; A bed, a desk and chair, and a few other basics for a human to live. Perhaps it isn't as grandiose as a study in your highrise on Terra, in the shadow of the gilded Imperium palace, but it is far more freeing.
Upon leaving hall was relatively empty; They hadn't felt content to put you in quarters with other baseline humans, but you were still far away from the Salamanders own barracks. You were sure Ralkan had a say in this intentional placement as your guardian.
Down adjacent halls you can sometimes see a hint of dark blue armor pass the corner of your eye as you walk, but by the time you go to look, it’s gone. You've seen glimpses of the Night Lords now that they're aboard the ship, but you've avoided a full confrontation as of yet.
Ralkan's suffocating protection has done a good job of it. However he has his duties and cannot be around you always, and you’ll take the moment to take a deep breath free of him for just a little while.
You would never say you dispised him, but his aggravating behavior has begun to make your quarters feel like a cage. You cant stay in there forever, you have to eat. You doubt he would scold you for such a thing.
When you reach the mess hall you quickly grab a heaping portion of food- anyone who notices pays no heed to the amount- and sit to quickly shovel it all down. It's less than appealing taste is like nothing else now, with how hungry you are, and you find it gone within minutes. Only crumbs are left, and finally you're full again.
You quickly get up and move to shuffle back to your quarters not moments after the last bit of food hits your belly. If you're quick and avoid too many eyes he'll never know, and you two can both continue being sweet on one another with him being none the wiser.
His heart is in the right place; It's just that his grip is far too tight.
Your feet hit the floor at a quick place, walking as fast as you can go. The halls are a bit emptier than they were earlier, but you notice your door is within sight after what feels like only a few minute trek. When you get in, you can continue to write about Commander Artellius, and your time with the Salamanders. Being in travel has made things largely uneventful, other than the edition of the new temporary allies.
You reach towards the door open it, when a voice cuts the air and nearly startles you into to the ceiling.
“Well, what is this?”
The voice is loud, with an odd accent that warps his words ever so slightly. The shadows overtaking you are massive, and they almost seem to have appeared out of nowhere.
Maybe they had been following you. You were too busy staring at your own feet to notice, worried about making it back before a fellow of Ralkan spotted you out and out.
With no other option you turn and look up, gazing over dark blue armor with dents and scratches, marked with brass edging and red accents.
Only one had spoke, but there's three here; The middle is the tallest, but the one to his right is the most scarred; And the one that spoke, judging by the way he's smiling. He's the cockiest one, clearly.
The one in the middle has skin pallid and marked, a massive, jagged scar cutting across the bridge of his nose and brow. You think his irises might be a color, brown or grey, but there’s something in them that almost seems to suck the light out of everything around him and make them almost as black as his hair. But unlike his brother, he's yet to speak a word.
Your hand hovers over the handle of your door, frozen. You've barely even looked to the third Night Lord to your right.
Stuck like prey, you jolt as you spot an armored hand begins to reach towards your face from the corner of your eye, towards your jaw, and you yelp as it clamps around your jawline. Instantly your own hands try to pull at his armored fingers, teeth gritting as he holds far too tight. The cocky one steps a bit closer and turns your face as if examining a curious trinket, before he notices something.
“She’s all bruised,” He says, his thumb shoving your cheek and pushing it.
You were? When Ralkan grabbed you last you saw him he must’ve done so too hard. You can’t feel it hurting, but you are more than used to the smattering of bruises across your skin from him. Even at his most gentle, it’s obvious he isn’t made with it in mind.
You look up at the one gripping you, watching his eyes rake over you. He laughs, a gravely chuckle that you can feel in your chest as his own rumbles. The third one simply watches, body blocking the only escape path away from the other two. He's watching, like the act of doing so is more amusing that actually joining in.
“I thought the Salamanders were supposed to be altruistic.”
The Night Lord turns your face harder, and you gasp trying to pull at his gauntlet to free yourself even a minutia. Your muscles ache, jaw yelling in pain as his gauntlet is like a vice grip around the bottom half of your face.
“Hey, careful.”
The one in the middle finally speaks up for the first time, and the one grabbing you turns to him and scowls, clicking his tongue. His nose wrinkles but he doesn't let go of you, goading his taller brother.
“What, you suddenly care? We don’t feed other people's pets.”
Reaching forward he tugs one of your hands away from your captor's gauntlet, raising it for your captor to easily see.
“Look at the clothes. I think she’s important.”
The one grabbing you scoffs and turns away, pulling you around again. His other gauntlet grabs at your other arm, and looks at your hand. His face perks considerably, and the jolt of fear it sends through you beats all others.
"Ink stains. You don't work. You're soft."
Something on his face and in his voice changes, and you try to dig your heels into the ground in some fruitless effort to stay put.
"Volya." The middle one says as your capture seems to be readying to pick you up. You can barely open your jaw to speak let alone yell, unless someone spots you, you stand no chance of getting out of where ever he's planning on taking you.
"Yeah yeah, she's important; What important person is shoved back here by all the serfs and storage? They won't notice."
You yelp digging your heels deeper, and briefly look at the one who has voiced even the tiniest bit of concern for you. He catches your gaze, and something changes in his eyes as your hands pull at the fingers that hold you.
Moments later he grabs at his battle brother’s gauntlet, the ceramite clanking against each other as armor plates collide. Your captor looks at the taller one like he's furious at just being touched.
“We’re already far out-numbered on this ship. Just leave it. Find a less important one to toy with.”
He looks at his brother for a moment, nose wrinkled and teeth barred, and you can feel the air change like a fight is brewing; But he lets you go.
“Fine.”
Taking his fellow with him the two Night Lords leave you and the tallest of the three, the one who stood up for you, alone. You rub your jaw and look up at him. He watches with an unreadable expression on his unkempt face.
“...Thank you,”
You say, and you’re surprised by the way he reacts to it. Though his surprise fades away, as he smiles. It feels like his teeth are too big for his mouth, his two sharp fangs press against the inside of his upper lip.
“It talks? A surprise.”
Whereas Ralkan is stoic and mindful, this man is the opposite; His smile is cocky and posture relaxed even in his hulking armor. His arms cross, but given the size of his chestplate, the closest he can get to fully doing so is gripping his forearms with the opposite hand.
You swallow the knot in your throat. You know that while he did chase the other two away, it's very well possible it's only because he wanted you to himself.
Though maybe it's that curiosity in you- the thing that Ralkan seems so irritated by- that has you prying for answers rather than just crying and pleading for him to let you leave.
“What is your name? You’re the first of your Legion I’ve met.” 
That wasn’t the question he expected to hear, you suppose. His face perks with surprise and curiosity not unlike a child.
“Lev.”
Ralkan told you they enjoy terrorizing the weak, only picking fights that they know they can win by overwhelming odds. You'd say if you didn't cower like prey maybe he would leave you alone, but that's impossible when Lev is a terrifying example of just how little of a thing you are, in comparison to these giants.
But he doesn't seem like how Ralkan described them on first impression, however. Perhaps he’s just hiding it so you let your guard down. Though why would he risk a fight with his battle brothers if that was the case?
“We didn't know they had any of you studious types on board. Do they keep you all locked up?” 
You're sure Ralkan would like to, if he had his way with it. Had he been less inclined to take your opinion seriously, you'd probably be chained somewhere in your quarters, right about now.
"I was, informed, to stay in my quarters until you all left the ship."
Lev snorts, his smirk lopsided. Before he has a chance to say anything more, you notice that he has blood coming from one nostril, down his lip. It’s dry, but you wonder if he was in a fight and broke his nose not long ago. The bruising around it and dipping underneath his eyes adds to the theory.
“You’re bleeding…”
You say, gesturing to your own nose. He brushes his gauntlet against his upper lip, and watches dried blood fall to the ground. He licks his upper lip, and more of the blood wipes away. You find yourself more distracted by the gesture than one would like.
“Ahh, one of your Salamanders saying things he shouldn’t have; He could throw a punch, but couldn’t take one.” He smiles at you again.
“I didn’t kill him, if you’re worried about him.” "Believe me, I wanted to. All these overgrown lot are a bunch of stuck up types. You think they'd learn to keep their mouths shut before I take something from it."
You get the hint that he's joking, as odd as that is; Salamanders don't often joke. But you also get the hint that the only reason he didn't kill the man, was that as he mentioned before, he's greatly outnumbered on the Flamewrought.
You hadn't been thinking about the Salamander oddly enough however, too focused on the purple and blue bruising scattered across the hump of his nose. Your eyebrows raise, back still pressed against the wall.
“But, are you ok?”
You mumble, watching his eyes look over you. It almost looks like he thinks you're messing with him, until he seems to realize you were serious, and his expression mellows a bit. He uncrosses his arms and reaches a hand for you, and unlike his battle brother, you don't shirk away from his gauntlet nearly as much.
He grabs your jaw much in the same way his battle brother had earlier, but soft enough that it doesn't hurt.
"You stink like one of them," He remarks, and you assume he's referring to the Salamanders. His fingers grip your chin and pull it upward, exposing more of your neck.
He looked as if he was going to open his mouth and speak more, but a voice cuts through the air and stops him dead.
“Do you not have somewhere to be, Night Lord?”
Ralkan's voice makes your heart nearly stop, though you can’t manage to pull your eyes away from the Night Lord even as he approaches with thundering footfall. Lev however does, and looks towards the Salamander who stands no more than a meter to his right. You can see his face sour as he’s forced to drop his hand.
“Perhaps. But I believe on our arrival you said we were welcome guests, can I not wander?”
Ralkan steps forward, just short of trying to shove his slightly larger body between the both of you. He reaches for you, a massive green gauntlet landing on your shoulder.
“Move along, Son of Curze.”
He gives Ralkan a look. One that while irritated, is pleased that he managed to get under the Salamander’s skin.
But the Night Lord still hesitates to leave, watching as you shrink under the shadow of your returned guardian. For a moment you fear he might start something, with the way he looks at you and follows the arm trailing up your shoulder to Ralkan.
But recognizing the fight isn't one that he's sure he'll be able to win, Lev turns away from your overbearing knight to look down at you with the same smirk he'd given you earlier.
"Another time, little Salamander."
Lev leaves. He walks past the Salamander with not even a look, and just barely they manage to not slam pauldrons as he turns away. 
When he is safely out of earshot, Ralkan looks down at you; His expression is still stoic, but you can see the anger hidden beneath it.
“I told you to stay out of their sight,” He says, gripping your shoulder tight. You attempt lightly to pull away, his grip painful, but make little progress.
“I, I’m sorry Ralkan but I had to eat. Did you want me to just starve in there?”
His gaze softens ever so slightly, but you can still tell he’s more than a little bit angry. At you, and himself. Even if he wasn’t at all angry at you, his emotions weigh still on you like lead. He takes this whole protecting you duty that he has been given so incredibly seriously, you wonder how much worse it's going to get until someone else might have to protect you from him.
Ralkan takes a kneel, coming eye to eye with you. Both of his hands now cup the sides of your shoulders, and he looks at you like he's almost pleading at you.
“Now that he has his sights on you there’s nothing that’s going to stop him until he has you.” 
Despite his unnerving look, the blood on his face from a fight that put a Salamander on an apothecary table, he didn’t seem to be the way that Ralkan had described them. 
Maybe he's lying, maybe Lev is faking it.
“It wasn't like he was going to carve me up; By the Throne, Ralkan he saved me. There was more of them, but he chased them off.” Ralkan lightly shakes you.
“They enjoy toying with things like you. Don’t assume anything.”
You take in a deep breath, your face beginning to get hot with anger. You'd said earlier that this ship was more freeing than Terra, but not that's beginning to not be the case.
“He didn’t do anything, just-“ Ralkan’s brow knits in anger and he cuts you off, speaking angrier than you think you've ever heard him. Astartes voices are booming, and his hits you in the chest as he raises his voice.
“There are Salamanders already injured because of them. I asked you to stay here because I trusted you to heed my warning, if you won’t, then I can bring you to my own quarters and lock you inside.”
You look at him surprised at his anger, and your mouth clamps shut. You're angry at him for threatening such a thing, as much as your not surprised by it, but you can't fight him. Not realistically. You look away from him and try to swallow a knot in your throat at suddenly appeared.
Ralkan, realizing he’s upset you, softens his expression and sighs. His hands slide down from your shoulders to hold your hands in his massive gauntlets. The gesture doesn't go unseen, as you look down at them for a moment. The ceramite is cold and rough on your skin.
“I want you safe. It is my duty now yes, but,”
He hesitates for a moment, before removing one of his hands from your own and cupping the side of your face. You hate that the gesture melts away some of the anger you have welled inside of you.
“I would be beside myself if anything were to happen to you. I want you to be safe for your sake and my own.”
He leans closer. In your personal space, breath fanning across your skin, he closes the gap and presses his lips against yours. You don't move for a moment, before you gently exhale and lean closer to him. His nose presses against your cheek, and you can feel the small scars of his skin brush against yours. With him so close you realizes just how warm he is, astartes always run hot but it's like his blood is fire, your lips and face feel so warm. Though it could be your own flush, body heating up.
When he pulls away from you lips separating with a soft pop, you feel some of that stuffy heat dissipate, but the burn over your face remains.
“I must remove my armor first but, will you return to my quarters with me? I will tell you all about Nocturne. You can rest there as well, if you’d like.”
He’s trying to make it up to you, you can tell. He may not be directly apologizing, but he's trying to give you something he knows you want in an attempt to be sweet on you again. You hate how well it works. If only it didn't feel like he had you trapped in a cage, bars getting tighter and tighter.
With the warmth of his lips still on your own, you nod.
“Alright. Let’s go.”
Ralkan smiles and rises to his feet. He gestures for you to walk beside him and takes your hand in his gauntlet once more, and you both leave your quarters for his own.
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onlyawhim · 2 days
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Treat you Better - Auston Matthews x Reader
Auston sees how Kasp treats you & thinks (and eventually proves ;)) that he can treat you better.
Totally made Kasperi a douche in this - sorry Kasp fans. Also, obvi set when they were both on the Leafs!
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Two months, you've been keeping track - but of course would never tell Kasperi (you can imagine it now: "Why do I care how long we've been talking? It's not like we're dating, Y/N"). Two months of being a second choice. No chance of commitment anywhere in sight. But you stay, because Kas is charming and good-looking. You convince yourself maybe he'll change, maybe he just isn't ready for commitment right now. Of course he's not just messing with you - he wouldn't do that.
He invited you to his game. You thought maybe this was a sign that he truly cared for you. Would he invite you to watch him if he didn't actually like you? Or did he just want one more Kapanen fan in the building? You push that second thought out of your head as quick as it comes.
Well, obviously he would just invite people to invite people, because here you sit watching him chat up two blonde girls who are very giddy to be graced by Kasperi Kapanen's presence.
The game was nerve-racking, ending with a 5-4 Leaf's win. You were excited to wait outside of the Leaf's locker room. You felt like a true NHL girlfriend. Well, you did, until Kas passed you with a nod (what am I, some fan waiting for a high-five?!) and headed straight for the two pretty girls also standing outside the lockeroom, clearly waiting for any NHL player to pay attention to them - hell, maybe even a gear manager if they were wearing a Leaf's shirt.
So, here you sit, waiting for Kasperi to decide that the girl he invited to watch him play - the one who dutifully cheered for every good play of his and only secretly cheered for one of the other good-looking men in blue - was worth his attention after all. You had even denied a ride home from your friends because "I'll just ride home with Kas". How stupid you felt now...
Kasperi is always a good time when you hang out. He's funny and charming. But this is your first time being in public with him - or, rather, in public watching him act like you're not with him.
You're growing angrier and angrier as Kas makes these girls giggle. Luckily, a good-looking distraction with wet hair steps out of the lockeroom. He looks set on leaving the building ASAP, until he locks eyes with you.
"Hey," he says with a smile, approaching you. You scan his face and sense that he's wondering who you are - why you're waiting. Which player you belong to, you think sourly.
"Hi" you smile politely. There's a pause, so you introduce yourself. "I'm Y/N".
"Y/N," he repeats, "I'm Auston." He sticks his hand out for a shake.
"I know" you giggle, shaking his hand. A dagger of a thought (so Kasperi hasn't mentioned you... ouch) flashes in your mind, but you try to ignore it for now.
"What ya doin out here?" he asks, nodding to the emptying hallway.
"Oh.. Kasperi invited me" you say, moving your gaze over to him. A third girl has joined his audience.
Auston looks over and sees the same thing you do. He nods slowly and moves his attention back to you.
"Gotcha... he doesn't know how to treat a guest does he?" he laughs awkwardly.
"No, it looks like he's pretty good at it" you say, smiling pityingly, nodding towards his group of female fans.
After watching for a second, Auston yells, "Kasp!" he pauses as Kasperi snaps his head in your guys' direction. "You done?"
You're a bit embarrassed, but grateful that you didn't have to be the one to break him from his conversation. Kasperi's eyes switch between you and Auston. Without saying anything, he walks towards the two of you, like a kid in trouble.
"Now I am" he says to Auston, before putting an arm around your shoulders and heading towards the door.
You look back and send Auston a smile. He smiles back with a small wave.
"You played good", you say to Kas, hoping to pretend whatever just happened for the last 20 minutes didn't actually happen.
"Yeah, thanks. Thanks for coming", he says as you both walk towards his car.
The car ride is awkward. Or, maybe, you imagine it as awkward. Kas seems just fine.
He takes you back to his place, as he always does. You sit on his couch, as you always do. The two of you haven't gotten any more intimate than a few kisses - you were adamant that you wanted to wait. He was similarly adamant that he didn't want to. Either way, you both sit on the couch, watching some movie that he picked. He didn't try anything more than an arm around your shoulders for the whole night. Instead, actually, you felt like he was just waiting for you to leave. Does he have other plans for the night?
"Do you want me to come to your next game?" you ask.
"Yeah, sure, if you want to come." he says, not taking his eyes from the TV.
God, this night was painful. But, you told yourself, maybe it would get better.
--
This game-day will definitely end better. The last game fiasco is behind you. You even asked to wear his jersey - and he let you! That has to mean something.
Here you wait, again, outside of the lockeroom. They lost this time - 2-5. Despite the score, you are proud to be sporting "Kapanen" on your back.
Auston steps out of the lockeroom before Kasperi. He locks eyes with you, once again, and smiles.
"Hey, Y/N" he says, approaching you.
"Hi. You played good tonight", you say, returning his smile.
"Not good enough, though", he laughs lightly, pitifully.
Before you can respond, Kas walks out of the lockeroom. This time, he walks straight to you - not past you. Progress!
Auston moves aside so Kasp can join the conversation - and though you would never say it, you preferred the one-on-one with Auston.
"See ya got her to wear your jersey", Auston says to Kasperi with a smile.
"She asked," he says, putting an arm around you. "Dirtied it up just for us to lose". Your smile drops (did he not want me to wear it??). This doesn't go over Auston's head, though it definitely misses Kasperi.
"You can dirty up my jerseys anytime, Y/N", Auston says lightly, giving you a smile. Kasperi laughs and leads you out the door. Again, you shoot a smile to Auston as you leave. How is it that Auston's on your side more often than Kasperi is?
--
Third home game. You've decided this is his last chance. His games are the only times you go out in public together - otherwise, you're just hanging out at his house. He is always so fun to be around in private. But once he gets in public, it feels like his facade drops. So, third try. Third home game.
They win this time, 4-1. You had washed and returned Kasp's jersey after his comment last time. Standing outside the locker room, you wait. Kasperi comes out before Auston this time (am I waiting for Auston? Why was I disappointed when it was Kasp and not Auston?).
"The guys are going for drinks, I'm gonna go with 'em" he says casually.
You don't know what to say, so you just look at him for a second to see if he's serious. Where were you supposed to go? He should have said something earlier so you wouldn't have waited out here for him. Before you can put any of these thoughts into words, Auston steps out of the lockeroom. He catches Kasp's next words.
"I can call you an uber if you don't have a ride or something." Was this his attempt at kindness?
"Kasp.." you say, exasperatingly.
Auston interjects. "I can drive you home." he says looking between you and Kasperi.
"You don't have to do that, man", Kasperi speaks for you. This leaves you even more shocked.
Auston ignores him, eyes still on you.
"I'd really appreciate that", you say, looking back at him.
"See, Kasp, it's taken care of. Have fun, man", Auston says, slightly stepping between you and Kasperi.
"Alright", Kasperi says, clearly not interested enough to say anything more. "See you guys", he says before turning around and heading for the door.
"Thank you, Auston. I really appreciate it", you say, nervously, embarrassed that you even came here with Kasperi.
"I don't mind. I'm not putting you in an uber", he laughs.
You laugh with him at the absurdity.
You both head for the door. Walking next to him, you can really appreciate how large he is. You blush at the whole situation.
He points at a Porche sitting in the parking garage, shining in all of its' luxury, "That's me", he says, unlocking it.
"Fancy", you giggle as he opens the passenger door for you.
He laughs and shuts your door, tossing his gear in the backseat before getting in on his own side.
The car ride is filled with comfortable silence, the radio playing quietly, only interrupted by your directions.
"Really, thank you for taking me home, Auston", you say, glancing at him.
He looks at you for a second before returning his eyes to the road. "I really don't mind. It's nice to see you somewhere outside of a dark hallway, anyways", he says.
"Yeah, you won't see me there again", you say, still embarrassed by Kasperi. So much for a third chance.
"Or, y'know, next time you'll be wearing a 34", he says. You laugh.
"Wouldn't wanna dirty up one of your jerseys" you giggle, referring to Kasperi's odd comment.
"God, he's a douche, isn't he. I'm sorry", Auston says.
"Just glad I had my knight in shining armor there to save me," you joke.
"That's what I'm here for", he laughs.
He pulls up to your building. "Want me to walk you up?" he asks.
"It's okay," you answer, "I have mace" you joke.
At this, he scoffs jokingly and turns the car off before getting out. You do the same, walking to your building with Auston behind you. You climb the stairs and stop in front of your door.
"Thank you, Auston". You say, locking eyes with him.
"Of course, Y/N." he smiles.
"Can I get your number, just to make sure you make it home safe?" you say.
He pulls out his phone and adds your number, giving you his.
"Have a good night, Y/N".
"You too," you smile, unlocking the door. He heads back down to his car.
A much better ending to game night.
--
The next morning you wake to the doorbell ringing. In your shock at the unannounced guest, you climb out of bed and check out the peephole. Through it, you see a delivery driver setting down a large bag.
You wait for him to walk away before you open the door to check out this mysterious delivery. Setting it on the counter, you open it carefully.
In it is a container holding a huge breakfast - pancakes, bacon, and fruit. Under the container, a Maple Leafs jersey - number 34. Matthews written on the back. You smile big at this.
You grab your phone to send him a text.
"Auston!!" you say, sending a picture of the gift.
"For the next game ;)", he writes.
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ma1dmer · 3 days
Text
Call of Duty - Russell Adler NSFW
AMERICAAAA RAAAAAAH 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex): he sits back, lights up a cigarette and brings you close to him, he needs a second to come back down, usually doesn't talk much right after, but he likes to listen as he trails his hand up and down the small of your back, blowing the smoke away from your face and offering you the cigarette, sometimes watching you talk makes him want to go for a second round
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s): he is a chest guy, he loves the feel of cupping your chest when you ride him, playing with your nipples or putting his mouth around them, he's really into feminization as well, you are his pretty little thing no matter what, and him playing with your chest enforces that, loves sexy bralettes, low cut tops and matching sets especially
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically): he loves the mess, everytime you get embarrassed he assures you that's exactly what his goal was, to have you ruining his sheets, whether thats by squirting or cumming, he also really loves pulling out right as he's cumming inside of you, just to watch it leak out of you, but that part is only reserved if you two have been together for a long time
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs): he has a few darker fantasies that he doesn't quite know how to bring up to you, he'll jokingly pepper them in during his dirty talk or when he pins you down, pointing out how easy that is for him, or when you leave your window open, or when you are drinking a bit too much, just a hint to something darker, maybe he's making you warm up to the idea, testing the waters to see if you'd like something like that, he'd never bring it up himself, especially if you are in an actual relationship, but he'd do enough to plant the idea in your mind make you want to at least explore these ideas
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?): of course he has experience, he has an ex wife, he's had his fair share of one night stands, and it's a real shame that he can backup all his claims, because he does get quite cocky
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying): reverse and normal cowgirl, enjoys letting you set the pace, his hands always on your chest unless you get tired at which point he'll pull you down chest to chest and thrust up inside you, fast and rough, knocking the wind straight out of you
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.): his favourite thing to get to you is acting as if you two are strangers just meeting each other when you are out at a bar, he hits you up with the cheesiest swoon worthy one liners, he buys you a drink, asks your name and everything, its stupid and god damn him it works every time he does it
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.): mostly keeps things trimmed unless he knows you two are meeting up for the night, then he has no issue cleaning it up entirely, he always smells very strongly of after shave, tastes like it too when you mouth at his neck
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect): he can flirt like nobody else, but being romantic, it isn't so easy for him, everytime you think he's doing something romantic, he's suddenly pulling away from you, both metaphorically and literally, mentally and physically, one second he's kissing you telling you he missed you breathlessly, the next he's spun you around to face the wall, not wanting to look at your face
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon): when he was by himself he had no qualms about handling himself, when he needed to fall asleep quickly or when he was too tired or lazy to pick someone else up, but once he has you, he likes to hold himself off, always tells you that he's doing it for you, how pent up he is and how difficult it was thinking of you while he was away
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks): impact play, cnc, feminization, voyeurism etc
L = Location (favorite places to do the do): your place, his place, any room, it does not matter, if you can't decide, a hotel room is a good copromise, he also enjoys the odd domesticity of a kitchen as well, coming up behind you when you are making breakfast for the both you
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going): he has a very sensitive neck, kiss the side of his neck while talking to him, drag your teeth down his collarbones and watch him melt
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs): there isn't a lot he'd be opposed to with the right motivation some would say, he is easy to convince, just give him some time to think things over
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.): don't get him wrong he loves tasting you, but nothing beats the image of you on your knees, he is a head pusher, he swears he doesn't do it on purpose, hes probably lying, the feeling of your throat around his cock is secondary to the sounds you make when you are caught off guard
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.): the foreplay is long and by the time he is ready to push himself inside you it really doesn't matter, the act itself is kind of detached he's mostly chasing his own pleasure and by then you don't really mind, already boneless and sore
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.): he loves them, loves the idea of them more than the mess dealing with them brings, messy hair, cum on his clothes etc etc, but he really doesn't mind squeezing you in while doing paperwork to destress or have you in the stalls of some run down bar on one of your dates
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.): you'll have to tell him what you want, most of the time he's willing to indulge you, he'll think through what you asked of him when he's gone and come back with a plan the next time he visits
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?): one or two solid rounds, the foreplay lasts longer than then act itself
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?): really really likes the idea of them, he won't bring them up by himself, but if you tell him you own some, he'll ask you to tell him how you use them exactly, do you think of him, he'll jokingly ask you if he should be intimidated as his fingers climb their way up and inside your thighs, in the end after he's thought about it a bit or a lot, he'll ask you to bring them out next time
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease): he loves fingering you, half the fun is shoving his fingers inside of you, feeling around for that spot that makes you twitch beneath him or on his lap, he is extremely skilled with his hands and he loves proving it over and over, he is also absolutely a pussy slapper, has you spread out on his lap, back against his chest, thighs kept apart by his own legs, he starts off gently, and then he gets quite mean with it, until he can feel your wetness on his entire palm and you are clawing at his forearm
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.): he groans and grunts, his voice deep and gravely when he feels you around him, he curses and dirty talks like its his job
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character): loves kissing, you are the bravest soldier if what you have with him is casual, he makes it so difficult to not think he's in love with you with the way he kisses, always chasing your mouth, holding your face between his hands, breathing against your lips, telling you you drive him insane as he pulls your hand to his cock
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes): he has a nice cock, a grower, straight with a pretty pink head, it fills up his fist nicely when he holds it for you
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?): he only lets himself think of you on his down time, when he is doing paperwork, when he's resting at night in his room lonely in his bed, when he can light a cigarette, palm himself through his pants and wonder when he can drop in to see you again
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards): he takes his time, almost as if stalling, waiting for you to go to sleep first, he'll let you talk, then he'll wander around the room aimlessly, go smoke, go to the bathroom, if you are not asleep by the time he comes back he might start another round, if you are he finally joins you, hugging you from behind and holding you the entire night
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jazzyquarterblugs · 18 hours
Text
𝐏𝐏𝐓𝐉: 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐀𝐋𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
Time to show ya'll the Altercanons for The Smiling Critters!! :D
(I have already looong posted them on my twitter but again for the Tumblr peeps I will post them here! :3)
From Oldest to Youngest!
Enjoy!
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Bubba Bubbaphant!
The smart and probably the most mentally stable one out of the bunch (more on that later-) being the oldest isn't really easy when you've got 7 younger friends most of which love to go on rowdy fun adventures, nonetheless he is always with them every step of the way whenever he can! (Mostly because he needs to keep them from accidentally getting themselves killed 💀)
His Talent
Bubba is capable of creating balls of light and is able to change the intesity of light sources around him, in combat he can create lightbulb shaped items and throw them at to flashbang opponents, disorienting them and giving him the advantage, though this uses up his own energy and so he needs to think carefully about how many he creates, or else he will likely pass out.
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KickinChicken!
The self-proclaimed cool guy of the critters. An daredevil who's always put looking for ways to have a lil fun, all the while making Bubba slowly lose his patience 😅 even though he may come off as an arrogant jerk to others, Kickin actually cares a lot about his friends and others more than he likes to admit! Just don't get on his nerves or he will make your life a living hell whenever given the chance!
His Talent
He can whip out three items of his choosing, whether it'd be a simple screwdriver or a flat out atomic bomb, all of which seem to follow a common theme 💀 though he is only lmited to three wishes and after using them all up he'd have to wait for an one hour cooldown before he can create more items again.
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CatNap!
Not a very talkative critter, neither is he really stable in ANY WAY to begin with, he went suddenly missing once for 3 whole weeks and came back never the same, for 9 whole months has he never ate, drank or even slept, and it's only a matter of time before one day he finally collapses in on himself...
His...Talent???...
He is able create sleep-inducing red smoke, making whoever is nearby inhale it and fall into a Deep Sleep... (it doesn't kill them dn)
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DogDay!
The leader of The Smiling Critters! And CatNap's best friend! This lovely sunshine is always ready for an adventure and bring a smile to everyone's faces no matter who they are! He is always standing up for what's right, willing to put his friends before himself.
His Talent?
His body glows a range of red to yellow whenever experiencing intense emotions, the hue and the temperature of his body depending on how intense the feeling is, if it is too intense his body is capable of burning the skin off of anybody who attempts to touch him.
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PickyPiggy!
The nature-loving and diet obsessed one of the group, she absolutely loves the wonders of mother nature, even owning an vegetable garden herself! She loves to eat but always makes sure she stays healthy when doing so! Though sometimes she is so entranced by eating food that she often forgets to keep up with the others and finds herself confused, she always feels like she has an reputation to uphold considering her father is a well-known cook in Critterville, to make things even less easy she has 12 younger brothers to take care of!
Her Talent
She is able to take and storage items within an infinite pocket dimension like a personal inventory in her pockets, though she needs to have actualy pockets for this to work, luckily she knows how to sew!
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Hoppy Hopscotch!
The physically active one of the group! And DogDay's beloved little sister! This rambunctious lil rabbit is willing to take on a challenge if it means having fun! Though she is really accident prone so she often gets herself hurt! (Pretty frequently actually-) but even so she doesn't know how to back down! While impatient and loud, she is happy to protect her friends from danger!
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CraftyCorn!
The shy and soft-spoken one! She's pretty timid but has an incredible creative side to her! She loves to create all kinds of art but most specifically loves to draw! Even though she may not have had the best first start of her life, but after moving into Bubba's home and becoming part of The Smiling Critters, she realizes she feels right at home.
Her Talent
She is able to mend and shape paint however and whatever she wants it to be! Whether it is colorful wings of freedom or another way to paint, she needs to have paint at her disposal though.
She is also capable of magic of her own! But due to her previous living conditions she was never able to tap into her gift and discover the wonders of unicorn magic all that much, though luckily Bubba has enrolled her to equestrian classes to help her with that problem! <)
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Bobby Bearhug!
The sweetest and youngest one out of the group! She was found alone outside near the Critters' treehouse, ever since then Bubba has taken her under his wing and has been taking care of her since, it is unknown what happened to her parents it has been assumed that they had just abandoned her.
Her Talent
She is able to sense the true intentions of a person's heart, helping her know who is worthy of trust or not, she is also able to sense the emotions of an individual though this can be physically and even mentally exhausting, making her needing to take frequent naps to gain her energy back.
Aaaand that is all I have for today!
I hoped you enjoy these Altercanons and if you have any questions regarding them or this AU feel free to ask in my ask box! :3
(repeat users are okay btw!)
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narratingvoice · 2 days
Text
My sincerest apologies for the radio silence from this blog recently. I know, it's very out of character for me. The thing is, I've been in a bit of a pickle over the past few months. The fiscal year for 2023 didn't end nearly as profitably as I projected, not even with the hype and celebration surrounding
THE TENTH ANNIVERSARY OF THE STANLEY PARABLE (2013)!
Server maintenance isn't free, you know, and neither are infinite holes. And with Unity changing its pricing structure on top of it, well, I really needed to put the old noggin to work finding a way to squeeze every last dime out of my fans provide new and valuable pieces of entertainment that will be worth your money. And that's why I'm thrilled to announce my partnership with the fine folks at I Am 8bit to bring you: The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe: Collector's Edition!
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It's true! Yes, I know I did a fake announcement for something similar last year, but this one is for real! A physical product that you can purchase and have delivered to your home, and play on your Nintendo Switch or Playstation 5. And this package involves absolutely no changes to the game itself, which really takes a load off my back. Since I have no presence in the physical world, I have to trust that my collaborators will deliver the finest quality items. And trust them I do. Shall we take a look at all the wonderful bonuses you'll receive?
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Stickers!
Just like the ones I slapped onto Stanley's bucket, now you too can slap these stickers on your own bucket. Or anything else that currently lacks stickers on it. You will not receive a bucket to stick them on. We floated that idea, but Mr. 8bit told me he'd rather not have to lug dozens of buckets down to the post office every day. You'd look like a right idiot doing that, I agree. So get your own bucket and enjoy the thrill of sticking!
Oh, and do be aware that whatever object you affix the "Property of Stanley" sticker to, does legally become Stanley's property, and he will demand you send it to him.
More surprises under the cut!
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An instructional manual!
"But Narrator," I hear you saying, "didn't you just say you're not giving me a bucket? What do I need this for?" First of all, do not interrupt me when I'm giving a presentation. Second of all, this manual is for the bucket that's in the game. I've noticed many players do not seem to know how to operate the bucket, and treat it like it's a person rather than an inanimate container. With this instructional manual, I will give you a comprehensive guide as to what a bucket can do (such as: prevent water from spilling all over your trousers) and what it cannot do (such as: love you back). I have had some harrowing experiences in the field of instructional manual writing, but I think this one is some of my finest work yet.
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A figurine!
Yes, our most requested piece of merchandise is finally here! The OFFICIAL Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe Stanigurine stands 5 inches tall and is made of durable PVC. And as with the virtual Figustans, that's all there is to it. There's no articulation or any type of toy action. You don't get anything but the feeling of deep satisfaction at owning this collectible. The package only comes with one, so why not buy six copies if you really want to recreate the game in your home?
But wait, that's not all!
If you are an absolute Stanley Parable fanatic, you'll want to supplement your Collector's Edition with even more plastic tat commemorating your favourite game. And you definitely want to support me as much as possible, right? So you can also buy:
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The button that says the name of the person playing the game!
For just $10, you too can have a button that says your name, presuming your name is Jim. The button will only say the name Jim and will never say any other name, no matter how often you press it. I found that a lot of players really got into the immersive experience of being Jim, so I decided to keep it that way instead of programming it to say a whole lot of names. Sorry, but there are too many different names in the world. You're Jim and you'll like it.
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Vinyl albums!
When you buy the Collector's Edition, you'll get a free code to download the Official Soundtrack in MP3 format. But what if you don't like MP3? What if you're a bit more old-fashioned in your audiophile taste? Well, I've got you covered! With this 2-record set, you can listen to all the office ambience on your gramophone or turntable. Why, you could even DJ a set with it! If you do, please send me your mixtape and I'll give it an honest review. My music taste is impeccable.
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An instructional audio cassette!
Yes, this is just a cassette telling you how to install and run a copy machine. Listen, I took some odd voiceover jobs here and there to pay the bills. And I figured, you lot are so ravenous to hear my voice that you'd even pay good money to hear me deliver some boring instructions. At least, that's the impression I get from the more saucy side of the fandom. So that's what you get. Do I do anything funny? You'll have to buy it and find out!
Hold on, Stanley is trying to tell me something. What do you mean, nobody has a cassette player any more? Why wouldn't they? It's the perfect compact audio format! It's got two sides, which is more than you can say for a CD, and it's a lot more portable than vinyl. Well I'm not shipping out cassette players. You can take it or leave it. No refunds.
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dairy-farmer · 2 days
Note
I call this the Highlander Au! >:Dc There can Be Only One! (Unless he REALLY enjoys the process and the world stops going to shit for like... FIVE god damned minutes!) (The second is sadly unlikely)
Tim? Fully Cis gendered male. Not terribly ATTACHED to this, physically, but certainly identifies as Male and has a male body.
Maybe it's been all the near misses. The "all my friends fuckin DIED on my and I mentally spiraled like you wouldn't believe". Could be him finally reclaiming his life. Or yet another horrible mental spiral. Who knows!
But he's decided.
He wants to be a Dad. *sound of various Bats choking and/or dropping things*
Is even seeing anybody? Nope. How the FUCK is he gonna get a baby?! Oh, normal, Bat Paranoid fashion. Cloning tube. Same way Damian happened. He just needs to figure out the maternal DNA and he's golden. Figure out where to hide his tech to stop Villainous Baby Snatching Plots.
Because that's a very real concern.
No you can't talk him out of this. Timmy want himself a baby. Is already designing a nursery and studying child development books. Parenting manuals, getting those little animal onsies, lazer death grids to ward of Ra's ninjas. The works.
Bruce is off to the side, quietly having an aneurysm and choking to death on his own spit. Baby boy? Fatherhood? OFFSPRING!? Alone and not going to LET HIM HELP!? But why would he help!? Bad idea! But. But he needs to BE THERE to TAKE CARE of TIM and the future BABY! Aaaaaaaaa-!!!!!
It's a... "Fun" time. Dick is nearing a nervous breakdown. Bruce not far behind. Damians having Feelings(tm).
Then! At a Wayne Charity Event(tm)? Small glowing child. Looks alien. Is getting upset. People backing away IN A HURRY because they just watched this child WARP REALITY to turn the nearest table into candy.
Tim is there as the face of the family. A hero. Already feeling generally Paternal. Upset baby is Bad. So he goes in, dispite clear protests. Gets low and talks soothing.
But the alien Wants Her MOMMY!
And? Oh. Well there goes the protective amulets JLA Dark made for him. Now he's in an alien dress and? Very much no longer Cis. Guess he would have and DID inherent from his dad's side of the family, no boobs. Tiny. At least he got his mom's killer legs.
And the kiddo isn't scared any more. Since he "looks like mommy".
Except not even remotely, because she warps into being an HOUR later, looking for her daughter and is made of pure light. Thanks him. Doesn't FIX anything. And just leaves. Gee, thanks lady.
There were REPORTERS there. Tim Drake has tits now. Front page news. Great. Ra's is GOING to know and get WEIRD about it.
Tim shrugs. Off to Leslie we go, though. Check up time!
Yep. Full lady bits action. And, hey! Shiny new spleen! So that's nice.
It DOES change his plan though. He didn't, you know, collect any "samples" yet. But? Does... does he NEED too? He COULD concoct a story of "rich person hires mystic to get penis back" after going and getting magiced back.... OR?
He could have someone put a baby in him! *simultaneous Bat Choking Noises*
MUCH easier to defend. THEN he could be changed back, after the baby is weaned. The problem is who to trust? Ra's is ABSOLUTELY going to do everything in his power to get his seed inside Tim new puss. So a seed bank is out. And-
*hands slam on the table*
Obviously! We can't trust anyone outside this house! Villian plots and Ra's specifically! Bat paranoia! W-we will just have to make this sacrifice for you!
.....Weirdly intense, but okay.
Objection! Says Tim's newly no longer Dead team mates. Tim tried to CLONE Kon! OBVIOUSLY it should be Kon! And Bart! Bro Threesome! Let nature decide! (Then kid number 2 is the other Bro, is only FAIR)
ALSO a good point. He did have that promise, if one of them ever got turned into a girl. And a Kon baby WOULD be nice...
Shit! Grayson pulls "last of my legacy and I have so much to make up for" cards!
Is betrayed by his OWN FATHER (Bruce! How COULD YOU!?) Who plays "you saved me from the time steam and nearly died for me, let me help(emotional)" to devastating effect!
Cheating! Howls the Speedster! You're CHEATING!!!
And Tim stands there... kinda confused but finding he's actually Really In To This as people argue over how much THEY want to be the one to put a baby in him? He's never felt this badly WANTED. Desired.
He may not want to go through the whole "actually carrying a baby for 9 months then pushing one out" thing more then once.... but the fighting over him thing? This might be awaking something.
And, well, Kon already made a good point. Why try to control it? Let nature decide~
Everyone can help.
The argument stops dead. For all of the seconds before "who goes first?" Occurs to everyone.
Sadly for THEM, Bruce is a bastard willing to play dirty to get what he wants. And his house his rules. He goes first. After all, he no doubt smirks, none of THEM have the... experience, to handle a virgin properly.
He refuses to allow Tim hurt on his watch.
Got it? Good talk. Tim, with him.
Which is what leads to Tim clawing at the bed and begging like his life depends on it, soaked in sweat, hours later. As Bruce STILL gently, teasingly, RUTHLESSLY eats him out. Puddles worth of lube ruining the sheets and easing his way, as he works calloused fingers DEEP to find spots Tim didn't know he had yet. As they rub and tease and fuck against those spots so relentlessly it feels like Tim's coming apart.
He didn't even know he could MAKE half these noises.
His hole is so wet and sloppy, it's like it's given up. Like his body can do nothing but quiver and twitch under Bruce's hands. Given how big he is? Probably the point. Because he crawls up to loom over Tim like a giant. Presses kisses to his whimpering, sweaty face. And rocks into his exhausted body, filling every inch of him.
It doesn't even hurt. Something that big probably SHOULD for his first time, but Bruce isn't a legendary playboy for nothing. And it just fills and Fills and FILLS. Rubs against everything in a way that makes his toes curl. Makes him want to gasp and cling, even though he's so exhausted.
Bruce just shooshes him. Pulls him close. He won't have to do a thing. He can just cling to Bruce and feel good. Bruce is here. He's got you.
And it's the best thing Tim's ever felt. Forget masturbation, sex is AMAZING. Bruce rocking then thrusting then pounding into his body. Holding tight like something precious. Hammering his good spots still he sees stars. Til he's nearly sobbing, hiccuping, from how good it feels to have his insides all messed up.
Bruce fills him up. All gooey and warm. Picks him up and carries him to a clean bed to get wiped down and tucked in. Cleans up then joins him. Fills him back up and tucks him close. He feels boneless and precious. Sleeps like the dead.
Discovers sex with a puss is AWESOME.
Next morning, he's barely out of Bruce's room before Dick is scooping him up and dragging him into his room. Almost franticly bending him in half as he presses him to the bed, kissing the air out of him. Holding his face as he whispers filthy praise into his lips. Hips relentless as they slam home, pounding at just the right angle.
Like he's trying to make for YEARS of mistakes by pouring it all into pleasure NOW. Clinging tight and trying to fry Tim's brain with how good he can make him feel. Dick buries his faces against Tim's neck and rutts like he's making up for lost time. Fucking Tim through orgasms, spilling again and again, like he's determined to drain his balls dry and wring every last bit of pleasure he CAN out of Tim's exhausted body.
Tim has to threaten to hit him with an alarm clock to let him up. Tim wants LUNCH damn it. They missed breakfast. By a LOT.
But then work calls. Damn it. So he has to get dressed. Double damn it. And he does it, but refuses to be pleased about it. Resolves things. Even gets ahead on work. Only for DAMIAN to walk stiffly into his office. Sus.
The gremlin hands him a frankly VERY well put together report on why he, Damian AL Ghul... should be allowed to fuck a baby into Tim. He has brought along a slide show and genealogical report.
.......Explain.
Damian does. He REALIZED some things about himself. When Tim was discussing becoming a Father. Using the same method as he, himself, was created. Went through a whole "go to the Kent farm and have a life change adventure" character growth arc, as you do. And? Now realizing that he potentially COULD be DIRECTLY involved in the Hypothetical Child's life instead of as an uncle?
He wants in. They could be glorious, combined. AND he firmly believes Tim will be a magnificent Mother. Let him Father your child.
It's a bad idea. Tim knows this. He literally JUST slept with Bruce yesterday and nothing good comes from sleeping with AL Ghul's. They Obsess. But? Fuck it. Maybe THIS is the thing that finally stops the Tim-Gremlin cold war and bring peace to house Wayne once and for all. He unbuckles his belt. Walks over to his resting room.
And Tim KNOWS, even as he's being urgently fucked into the fold out bed, that this is an AWFUL idea. No way in HELL, from the desperate and sloppy thrusts, clinging, panting and whines, is this NOT Damian's first time. He's utterly undone.
Pounding load after load into Tim because it feels too good to stop. All enthusiasm and no skill. Half the pleasure Tim's even GETTING is his own hand, relentlessly teasing his own clit. But? Oh. The feeling of being wanted so BADLY. Of cum, gushing and gushing into him. Knowing it's HIS hole that's so good, it's driving Damian incoherent.
He feels... sexy. It DEFINITELY does something for him. He may not be able to go back. Could see himself enjoying being a milf.
But of course. Business hours end. And he PROMISED! Is swept up by Bart for their threesome. Which, after several rounds and untold loads of near-no-refractary-period speedster cum dumped inside him? Is kinda spotty, in his memory.
All he knows for certain is he wakes up to his sheepish best friends, "Sorry we fucked you unconscious repeatedly" bribes, no voice, and a warm bath. He's also plugged up and FULL full of that premium speedster/half-kryptonian blend cum, because apparently his friend intend to WIN and nothing says victory like overwhelming odds. He'd call them fuckers, but they ARE and hold no remorse. He can't move.
Carry him you bastards.
When he asks where Cassie is, he learns she's apparently trying to harrass the magic users into a making her a temporary "turn me into a dude" amulet. Both as a gift AND so she can join the race for Father Of Tim's Baby. Huh. Interesting new options.
Obviously, throughout ALL of this, ninjas. Because Ra's has never wanted to smash so hard in his LIFE.
Instead, Tim is out here, on Jason's shitty couch. Getting lifted up and slammed down onto his cock. Called baby girl. Princess. Jason's never been harder. Already planning their kids graduation dinner and baby number three.
Tim feeling precious and taken care of and DESIRED. Like the young adult with a first shitty apartment he never got to be. Something so close to normal. Put a baby in him. Fuck him like you love him, like they do this every Saturday night, then eat pizza and watch trash TV. Fill him up.
And if course~ it's a VICIOUS game of Fuck The Tim keep away, up until one day he starts to show. Then Everyone is loving and coddling and in a "No I Am The Father" cold war. The birth is a nightmare, because Tim is slender and more scar tissue then not. But?
Adorable quarter-Kryptonian! With the biggest blue eyes and Tim's porcelain doll face.
Tim is NOT doing that again. Ffffffuck giving birth. And being pregnant! Granted, the EARLY part? He loved. He glowed. Getting pregnant was AWESOME. But later stages? God awful. Clone tube babies from here on out.
Absolute Devastation in the Tom Fucking Community. Babe no! You can't MEAN IT!
Woah, hey! He never said he'd STOP. "Getting Pregnant" is very, VERY enjoyable. He's just refusing to carry SHIT. Birth control for HIM. Scooping that slurry of "leave it up to Nature" out and storing it. Now... Kon stop being smug and hold your son.
-🐼🐼🐼
😭😭😭 tim getting everyone to come to dinner and they all think it was alfred and are like 'this was a great idea alfred! we should all get together like this more often' only for tim to cough and say well actually i called you all here, i figured you all deserved a heads up since i'm going to be undergoing some serious life changes. everyone's confused and then tim says he's going to have a baby.
immediate panic and some disappointment from bruce because he thinks this is a teen pregnancy and he expected better from tim only for tim to have to yell to interrupt everyone and say there is no 'girl', not yet anyway. he's just announcing that he's GOING to have a baby. they're not yet conceived and now the family is dealing with whiplash of how of course TIM would do something like this now they're sitting their listening to him talk about the ideal gene pool given tim's family has a history of mental issues and he's going into some very detailed things like nurseries and everyone just wants him to slow down because tim is still a kid!!! dick is older than him and even HE doesn't feel ready. so everyone is trying to talk tim out of it while tim insists he's ready, he's been going to a therapist for 11 months trying to deal with his issues so he COULD be ready to be a parent.
which of course baffles them even more because???? dick has been trying to get them all into therapist for years and tim just???? went??? on his own????
bruce is of course the least welcoming of tim's ideas of teen parenthood. because what about highschool, college? at least ONE of his kids has to go to college!
tim however says no, says his GED is more than enough.
bruce tries finding other angles, asking what if he just sets tim up with babysitting gigs? make him see kids aren't that great and tim just huffs and said he already did a bunch of babysitting and volunteering at the children's centers in gotham as part of his adoption application!
which ???? just stressed bruce out even more?! because tim had tried to adopt a baby first? but apparently got rejected because of his age, lack of partner, and lack of job which tim loudly says is unfair because bruce was in his 20s when he took in dick and HE hadn't had a partner or a job!
so the family is protesting, despertly trying to get tim to change his mind,,, then tim gets a womb and suddenly the protests die down VERY quick.
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mdhwrites · 2 days
Text
Belos' Empire Was Perfect
In theory. For a kid's show dictatorship, I don't know how much better you could do with your concept, especially with the themes that TOH was going for.
I want to emphasize this because it's going to sound like this is praise for a bit: IN. CONCEPT.
Belos' dictatorship has a very easy methodology to it as presented by literally the only three elements of oppression we ever see. The Conformatorium in episode one and the prejudice of wild witches which... Wait on that one. And finally the last one is of course the coven system. This forms the backbone what is frankly one of the most basic elements of any dictatorship: The loss of self. Without individuality, you do not have self worth and thus do not consider whether the treatment you are being given is what you should be getting.
This is coupled by the Wild Witches being the enemy of all. You do not question the state because they are the only thing protecting you from that boogeyman under your bed that will destroy all that you know if not for them. Adding theology to that is honestly barely a change. It just means you worship the government approved god rather than the government itself. It really cannot be understated how that BARELY changes the actual mechanics of a dictatorship besides them likely implementing prayer more.
But none of this is violent besides the wild witch stuff and even TOH tried to be clever in showing that the enemy never existed (in the dumbest possible ways that I have discussed before but I couldn't find my blog about it). So... No violence but all the oppression of a dictatorship! That's literally perfect for a kid's show about rebelling against a system that wants to push you down and put you in a box.
Partially because it allows for some of the best parts of being a kid to be the driving method for success: Friendship and Creativity. Your open heart and open mind. In a world that is stagnant, you will bust it open with your ideas and your unique personality, especially while mixing with others and giving them back their own individuality. This isn't complicated but it works EXTREMELY well.
And TOH executed on none of this concept.
That isn't even an understatement. Wild Witches DO exist, we see them being round up in Eda's Requiem, but that's also the ONLY time we see them. So the main enemy is only humanized through Eda who is a genuine piece of shit before Luz so Belos is kind of right about her unfortunately. So the boogeyman is real and indeed the only people who give a shit about them is the EC so yeah, the populace is just correct to fear them.
And why wouldn't they when they have complete freedom under the government? We see PLENTY of weird people during the time of TOH and none of them go to the Conformatorium. The prison may as well exist just for the pilot for how much it actually matters or does its job. The idea that being different and unique will get you jailed just straight up does not exist after the first episode except for a VERY discordant moment of Luz and King being jailed for walking on grass. Otherwise, NOTHING.
(To drive this home briefly: Someone in my Discord pointed out while I wrote this that Gus' interest in humans is seen as weird and discordant from the rest of the populace. It is why he isn't more popular despite his skills. So... Why is he able to be loud and proud about that interest if your unique interests get you jailed?)
And in return for submitting to the coven system, the citizens of the Isles enjoy protections they don't appear to have had before, have a level of technology that COULD NOT have been a thing during Belos' rise or else he literally couldn't have done it because his rise to power is genuinely terrible, and they have freedoms that anyone in America shares. As far as we know they don't even censor which is dictatorship 101. They don't even enforce their own rules because so long as Eda, the most wanted criminal on the Isles, doesn't literally point herself out and scream at the top of her lungs who she is, no one, not even the guards, will bother coming for her. The Isles is genuinely idealic in this way.
And it comes back to a problem that TOH has of well... Yeah. It had to be appealing and easy because Luz is a genuinely terrible person. If the Isles had been awful, a place truly hostile to her like Amphibia was to Anne, then she would have just gone home. The only way she decides to stay in the Isles is because she's cosplaying. Not because she actually has a sense of justice or duty against corruption, otherwise Luz might not have taken until HOLLOW MIND to actually for once speak against Belos or do literally anything against the EC (and only once she doesn't get to have her witch cloak because of it because these writers have no idea how to write a genuine hero or honestly a properly good person. Just nice ones.) but because she can pretend to be Azura. We even somewhat got confirmation because she literally ends the series just admitting she sees Azura as her. She quotes the god damn book and what is supposed to be cyclical is actually INCREDIBLY toxic because it's just a fulfillment of her fantasies rather than any acknowledgement of reality or growth besides "I only can exist in a fantasy world," which is GREAT messaging to your LGBTQIA+ and Nuerodivergent fans. Thanks show.
So this concept they have for their themes essentially REQUIRES that there be a dictatorship, and allows for one you can do in kid's shows (reminder: there is somehow a stock trope of a villain getting ultimate power and immediately going Nazi with it in kids' shows. They ABSOLUTELY could have shown more than what TOH did.). They just also couldn't because the protagonist they wrote and the wish fulfillment they wanted to play into, as well its 'subversive' elements, literally couldn't function with it actually existing. With the show actually being about taking down that hates you just for being you.
And I REALLY want to emphasize that that's not new. POKEMON has their main villains, including Team Rocket, not care about the individuality of their Pokemon, and thus be willing to brutalize them, because all they care about are results. The main villain for Slugterra's whole thing is robbing slugs of who they are, turning them nasty and violent, just to make them 'more powerful' and that WAS a Disney show. TOH could have done this...
They just didn't and I cannot tell you why besides them not actually being interested in telling their own story or themes because otherwise, why did you include this?
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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!
I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.
A Twitter you can follow too
And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.
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follows-the-bees · 3 days
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What's ur issue with edizzy?
Any relationship that ties Izzy with Stede or Ed, I am not a fan of. I live by a ship and let ship philosophy but I will curate my timeline so I don't have to see ships that I personally don't like.
I don't like Izzy with Ed because it is clear to me in canon that Izzy doesn't actually love Ed, and he realizes that at the end when he gets to grow and start to become his own person that isn't clinging onto the persona of BB and the strict masculinity Izzy has been holding onto.
To Ed, Izzy is just another father-like figure that is part of his trauma response. (Captain Hornigold, the fisherman, etc are also part of this.) And at least twice, we see Ed react negatively to any affection offered to him from Izzy. He is not in love with him. And I will even argue that while Izzy loves Ed, he isn't in love with the real Ed. He does wish him well though.
I think a large part of Izzy's season two journey is finding out he isn't in love with Ed. And even if Izzy wasn't killed at the end (I think there were plans to bring him back in s3, there's a lot of foreshadowing in the story, just like there was foreshadowing of his death) Ed and Izzy needed to be apart to grow out of their toxicity.
The Discomfort in a Married State episode seems to be peoples biggest evidence of a sexual edizzy. But I think that's a baseline reading of what that episode is trying to communicate. It is not about sex/romance, it is about the societal expectations that are causing the discomfort. For Stede, it is about living in this married state and the societal expectations in it, while he is incredibly unhappy. So unhappy, he runs away, and is even suicidal, but would rather live a short life as a pirate then continue living in "discomfort." For Ed, it is the societal pressures of being Blackbeard. He is also suicidal and trying to get away from it and we see him tell Izzy this directly in this episode, and Izzy's response is basically, buck up and pull yourself up by your bootstraps. (Now there is a whole thing of Izzy as the middle manager trying to keep his bad boss and the crew in check, which is why he responds like that reading. But also, I will say Izzy constantly lies to the crew, to Ed, to whomever, and I don't think it's always to "try to keep everything working" or however you want to phrase it. A lot of times it's to his own advantage, and the show also shows that he's in the wrong. It may be done in a funny way, but throughout both seasons, Izzy continually makes the wrong choices by the narrative.)
Years ago, Ed and Izzy may have gotten along but not anymore. That's why Ed and Stede work so well, they are confined by society and those societal norms being put up on them by outside forces, but together, they can just be themselves.
I haven't even touched upon the abuse side of things because I know that's a tricky subject, but I don't want Ed or Stede to be with their abusers.
You did not ask about stizzy or Steddyhands, but I'm on a role, so here goes.
I read Stede as demisexual. I think there is also a very clear canon reading and support of that theory. And it is also clear he wants Ed, and only Ed. Doesn't mean he hasn't had dalliances with others in the past, but once he's set his mind on Ed, that's who he wants. Because it's Con playing the character, he has sexual vibes with everyone, and that can be easy to play into if you want to ship Izzy with anyone. It makes sense. Especially cause Con will repost any Izzy art, including any Izzy ships, because he is a great man who wants to support art and support us.
But stizzy just doesn't make sense to me, for reasons stated above.
And for Steddyhands, I have found that most people who support Steddyhands are usually using it as a way to heal Izzy. Or that Ed and Stede are too "whim-prone" and they need Izzy to balance them out. And that is clearly taking away both Ed and Stede's agency, which could be a whole other discussion. Also, Izzy has represented the toxic masculinity of being a pirate, and he gets to grow away from that, but not completely. So teaming that person up with the two men, whose entire journey is to get away from societal norms, and not fitting into society because they aren't playing their masculinity right, to become themselves and live by their own rules, takes away the entire thesis of this show and their relationship.
Now having read all this, you may think that I hate Izzy. And the thing is I don't. I love canon Izzy. I don't particularly like fanon Izzy, and quite frankly his more extreme fans have tested my patience on my love for him, but I find him intriguing. But Ed and Izzy's relationship in canon is absolutely fascinating and I loved seeing Izzy's journey over the two seasons. I just don't think it being tied to Ed and Stede sexually/romantically is it. Not for me. But as I said, ship and let ship.
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maraudersmyloves · 21 hours
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hiii, congrats for the 750 followers!! 🎉 the event is so creative and adorable too, i'm in love with it <3 can i please get a thornless rose, pink, with statice and tree fern (the prompt being "can we stay just like this?") thank you anyways, i love your blog!!
thank you for requesting!!
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CUT AND ARRANGED JUST FOR: anonymous
⊹˚₊˚꒰🌹・꒱ THORNLESS ROSES ; James Potter, golden retriever x black cat, Fluff
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⊹˚. ౨ৎ can we just stay like this?
Pairing: James Potter x reader Warnings: cussing Word count: 739 Disclaimer 1: Everything on this Blog is fiction!!! "lazy mornings". :☆。゚. ───
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You often wish for the morning to last longer. Your dorm mates wake up expecting to hear you grumbling about how it's way too early and the air is too cold. The only thing that gets you to shut up about it is the breakfast, even though it's not the best you appreciate any warm food in the morning. So, when you decide not to show up to breakfast on waffle day it raises some questions.
You, however, haven't bothered to think about something as mundane as breakfast when you're in James' warm arms. You've been awake for at least an hour but chose to stay still listening to the calming heartbeat in James' ever-rising chest. He's been awake for even longer than you, but can't bring himself to do more than mumble quiet "I love you" s into the warm and slightly stuffy air. He pulls you impossibly closer, knowing what's about to happen.
His last-minute alarm is going to go off in about five minutes, meaning he really has to get up. But then he wouldn't be hugging you anymore, so… Instead of thinking about the breakfast he's missing and the places he has to be he opts for simply looking at you. Your face is snuggled into his chest, hiding your gorgeous face from his view. Since he can't admire your beautiful features, he lets his eyes scan your relaxed posture.
Your legs are intertwined with his, with one hiking up higher than the other, while your arms circle his waist and he can't help but sigh in adoration as you wiggle around to get even more comfortable,
James loves moments like this, but sadly it is disrupted by a high-pitched alarm going off from his desk. It's a good trick, really. To have the alarm far enough away that he has to stand up to stop the disgustingly loud beeping but god does he loath himself for doing it. You don't seem too fond of it either as you release a muffled but originally very loud scream into his chest.
"God, James! What the fuck kind of alarm is this. Put it out, won't ya??"
He chuckles. He goddamn chuckles at you as if a war crime wasn't being committed to your ears. God, you hate him.
"Can't love," he says with a big smirk as if the alarm isn't even bothering him. Of course, it isn't. Nothing bothers the great James fucking Potter. You would've thought he cared more about still having fine hearing when he's thirty but guess not. Then again if this continues he won't even live till twenty-one if you've got something to say about it.
You breathe out through your nose, irritated as you answer, "Why the fuck not?" And he looks like he just found a pot of gold under a goddamn rainbow. God, you want to kiss slap him!!
"You're laying on me, darling."
Oh.
Well, guess he really couldn't.
Maybe you should apologize. You do feel a bit bad, nonetheless, you roll off him with a huff and a small glare. Can't let him know he's defeated you.
He stands up after giving you a small kiss on the nose and walks over to his desk to put an end to the noise. When he does, he can see and hear you calm down. You exhale and your whole face relaxes, you're eyebrows unscrunch (is that even a word??) and your eyes go from squeezed close incredibly tight to slightly open. You're lying on your back now, body covered in his oversized shirt and giant blanket.
You look at him sweetly and he knows he's going to have to ask Remus for notes later because he wants nothing more than to spend the day here, cuddled up with you.
Apperantly, you don't agree.
You move to get up but before you're able to do more than put away the blanket James is covering you in his body instead. And he will not let you go. "Jamie," you whine. "We have to get to class."
He kisses your neck, "class is boring."
You try pushing him off you even though you know you won't be able to lift his muscular body off you. The fact that you don't really want to doesn't help either. Sadly, though, you have common sense. "For you maybe. I actually have to study."
"I'll help you later. Can't we just stay like this?"
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yuujisonlylove · 1 day
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Emergency call
Sypnosis: You recently graduated as a nurse, oficially working like one already. You had to attend some people that were injured on an accident, is there when you find your ex bf from like 2 years ago is there too!
Words count: 1.6k
TW: No one? Slightly mentions of physical damage, nothing serious.
Btw, my first time writing! I've never written before and english isn't even my first language. Sooo; anyways, I had this idea hearing "Llamado de emergencia" - Daddy Yankee.
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Well, it's been like 2 years already?
The last time he saw you, you were almost in the middle of your nursing career or something. He assumes you are already working or something, he doesn’t really understand how medicine careers work or something, it's kinda complicated. 
The only reason he cares it’s because it was the reason he broke up with you, some shit like “I want more time to study, but don’t worry, I will come back after some years”.
Surprise, it's already been two years and no notice of you after you left the town.
Anyways, he was cooking some shitty recipe he saw on instagram, he didn't even know why he even tried. The only times he eats decent cooked food is when he goes to dinners or when you used to cook for the both of you. He thinks he is almost over your awesome self; he doesn’t cry hearing cigarettes after sex songs while he sees your polaroids together. Plus, he remembered you because he can’t believe how someone can be that bad at cooking, i mean, himself.
He smelled something weird, gas? Nah, it can’t be, he is very careful with that and plus he trust the safety of the complex of his apartment enough to assume it can’t be a gas leak. So, he saw the third step of the recipe and went to the oven to see how it was all going until… Bum!
Yeah, to the surprise of no one, it suddenly all burns in fire. It was a gas leak, of course it was, the smell warned him like ten minutes ago but he is just too fucking stubborn.
-
You were resting calmy, eating a piece of bread and a coca cola with your work buddies. Until you get a call. Some people were hurted by some kind of explosion and they needed immediate help; it was your work anyways, now that you are officially a nurse.
You fastly fix your uniform and get onto the ambulance with the rest of your coworkers. Well, it’s not the kind of thing you would like to do on your first day in this hospital after they transferred you back to your hometown. But, work is work and you get paid for this.
You are on the back with Shoko, your friend. A guy it's driving to the building and the other passenger puts on some music. It's not the best to put Ariana Grande on the way to attend people probably dying, but it calms you all in the meantime.
When you arrive, you already see the firemen attending to some people and turning off the fire of the building. You fastly got out of the ambulance and went to the first person you saw, fastly making him (apparently, you haven’t paid attention yet) lay down on a stretcher while you took out your first aid box and finally saw him.
For your surprise, and his surprise too. It's him, your ex, great. Congratulations I guess, you kinda missed him when you were gone, welcome back Satoru Gojo!
“What a surprise, mhm?” You said with a subtle smile, checking his vital signs while he looked at you in amusement.
“You- Uh…” He tries to say, you just made a “shhh” sound, putting your index fingers softly over his lips to shut him up, you knew him. You ignored his attempts to talk and leaned over to hear his heartbeat with your stethoscope.
“How bad, it seems we have to get you to emergencies” You say, fastly keeping all your supplements in their box again, calling two of your coworkers to put his stretcher on the ambulance. In less than a wink, he is already being attended by other people and you were looking out for other hurted people.
-
For his sweet delight, he saw you. How lucky he felt, he was just thinking of you some minutes ago, what a coincidence.
It was sweet seeing you, at least he knows now you are officially graduated and working already, and in this town. Fuck, you would miss him? He wouldn't mind coming back to your arms again and eating your delicious food every day.
He can’t think that much with those annoying murmurs of the doctors attending him and the insufferable screech on his ears. He just gets to distinguish something about some high pressure? I guess.
Anyways, going back to the initial and important theme. Damn, you looked good on your uniform, too good. How lucky he is to be saved by you. Maybe not saved because he will probably survive this but, anyways, you get the point.
After like an hour, you come back to the ambulance. You sigh and make a messy ponytail on your hair, sweating a bit. “God, luckily just him is gravely hurted” You said, sitting beside his stretcher and you chuckle quietly looking at him.
He slowly started to feel dazed, looking badly and even imagining hearts in his view as he saw you. What was that? Effects of the anesthesia, better late than ever, right?
He felt kinda drugged, ngl, but in a good way. If you already looked good, now having you in front of him seeing you prepare a needle with hearts (that he was imagining) around you and like a pink kdrama type filter it just makes everything better.
“Satoru, I'm going to put this in your arm, okay? Stay still” You saw, one hand softly resting on his stomach as you stood up next to him, looking down at him with a calm expression.
*”Satoruu” He repeats giggling, it seems he just heard that; looking at you even with more hearts and everything, hell, he even thinks it's in the background reproducing some romantic music.* Well, news, it was like some the weeknd song btw, nothing romantic.
“Yeah, ‘Satoruu’. You knew it was your name?! Wao!” You giggled, seeing the man smiling lazily at you and giggling. You take advantage of his calm state to introduce the straddle.
“Mhm. But it sounds better when you say it.” He hummed, replying as you put a band-aid on his arm.
“Oh, don’t tell me” You laugh again, checking his vital signs again and letting out a sigh of stress. For then, start to drink from a bottle of water you had around.
“You.. You and I should be sleeping happily, maybe even in this shit. It can stand the two of us, you aren’t that heavy” He says suddenly, looking at you. You, in disbelief spill out a bit of your water out of your mouth in a laugh. Even the other people laugh, hell, even Shoko who was driving.
“Fuck… Sorry?” You try to calm your laugh at him, both of your arms softly resting on the side of where he is laying.
“I told you, like, you look good enough right now. You take off my pants and th-” He tries to say, only to be interrupted by you softly slapping his chest and laughing loudly again with the rest of the people.
“Control your mouth” You said laughing again, you can’t believe this man. It has been two years and he hasn't changed a little, he always used to expose you and himself like this.
-
When everything has calmed down, you led his stretcher to the emergency room fastly and prepared himself to rest. He wasn’t that badly injured really, he can leave in like an hour.
“Well, Satoru, you seem well. If you’re lucky, you can leave in like 30 minutes” You said, checking his papers and writing something on the other. Standing next to him.
“Im not well” He says with a pout, it seems the anesthesia still have effects.
“Oh, and that's why?” You sit next to him with a smile, looking at him with your eyes, battling your eyelashes at him unconsciously.
“You left me, a long time ago” He said sadly, yep, it seems he still has the anesthesia effects. You just chuckled and rolled your eyes, seeing him slowly fall asleep.
-
Some hours after, he woke up feeling a bit bad, a bit better, a bit of everything. He had a headache, kinda hard.
He groaned and looked up, not remembering well the events of yesterday more than your beautiful self. He fastly rubbed his eyes and tried to look up for you, abruptly trying to stand up.
“Calm your ass, she isn't around right now.” A female voice says, the woman placed a hand on his chest to stop him. He looked at her and well, it was Shoko, unfortunately.
“Shoko, the fuck? I haven't saw her in like two years and then she came but then she is g-” He tries to say, his pressure abruptly growing. Shoko makes an “ooo” sound, checking some appliances around him.
“Calm down Satoru, look at your pressure. I think you should check yourself out sometimes, something is wrong with your pressure” She says, looking at him.
“Oh, I almost forgot.” She humm, taking all the appliances and things on him out, letting him free to go.
“Good luck, she gave me this.” Shoko said, her hand looking for something in her pockets. She take out a pack of cigarettes, her keys and then… Finally!
She gave him a paper, she didn’t read it so she can’t explain to him what it is. Anyways, she has more work and she can text him later, she walks out the place while she waves her hand at him.
Satoru walks out the place with a sigh and look out at the paper.
-
“Heyy, so here’s my number ****-**** !!
missed u, ig :p
w love, Y/n”
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loveforlandonorris · 21 hours
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🎤 Lando at the post-race press conference in Australia:
(So again, this video isn't mine, sadly. I can't access post-race press cons in the UK. I found this on YouTube, but this specific video I saved is not on there anymore, so I can't credit the original uploader. I've also cut the video to only include the questions and answers involving Lando)
Transcript:
Interviewer: Lando, coming to you, very many congratulations on your 14th career podium. Was this one unexpected?
Lando: Um, I think when you take the Red Bull out of it, I would say, no. I think our pace has been good all weekend. We put things together very nicely yesterday, uh, we showed a good, long run and high-fuel pace on Friday. So I wouldn't have said, uh, we had no chance. I didn't expect probably us to be competing against the Ferraris today. I think our pace was not as good as Carlos, but probably better than Charles.
So, I think, um, if I was being honest, we maybe missed out a little bit on an opportunity to be P2 today. But, um, yeah, for us to say that is a good sign, and I think, um, yeah, it's a good positive for the whole team. Uh, it's a good boost, it's nice to be back on the podium. And, uh, yeah, whether or not the Red Bull was there or not, um, our pace was good today and, uh, hopefully that continues for more races.
Interviewer: What more could you have done about Charles? Perhaps the undercut at the second pit stop? Was there... you say you left it on the table, but what could you have done?
Lando: I mean, we didn't leave anything on the table (laughs). But, uh, yeah, the lap we were gonna undercut, he boxed, so then, again, you have to go off and do, kind of, a different strategy. So, uh, we got close in the second stint, um, I got very close. Uh, if I boxed, I think I would have undercut. Um, but he boxed, so I missed that opportunity. So you always think, "what happens if we did it one lap earlier?"
But it's tough to make all those decisions at the time. And, um, it can easily go wrong at the same time; there are always consequences of doing so. So, um, I think we still did a very good job today. Uh, 3rd and 4th for us, as a team, is positive and a good load of points. Um, but they were clearly a better team, and, um, they have a better car at the minute. So whether or not we could beat them, they have a better car, they have a quicker car, and, uh, we have to work harder until we can, uh, match what they're doing.
Interviewer: Well, what about Suzuka in two weeks? Do you think McLaren, uh, can take a step forward again there, given where you were at that racetrack last year?
Lando: Uh, not really. Um, I think if, uh, if you look back to here last year, we were not terrible considering the car that we had. Um, we've now come back with a good car and we've shown what we can do, but I think this was always gonna be a good weekend for us. Um, Suzuka proved that last year, so I think they're kind of similar, you've got a lot of high speed. The problem is Ferrari have improved their high speed a lot, and that's where they were struggling last year.
So that's why they've been able to take such a good step forward. Um, I think we can still have a good weekend, we can still look forward to it. And I would love to say, if we can get two cars on the podium again, it would be, uh, a lovely weekend. But, um, I think we have two more cars this year that we're competing against on these types of circuits, not just, uh, not just Max.
Journalist Questions:
Interviewer: This is probably a good moment to bring in, uh, a question that's come in via email from Scott Mitchell-Mahm at The Race, and it's:
Question 1 (Scott Mitchell-Mahm – The Race, via email) First of all, to Charles and Lando, who know Carlos so well as a person and as a racing driver, do you guys think Carlos is underrated? And to Carlos afterwards, do you sometimes think you don't get the credit you deserve?
[Charles answers]
Interviewer: Lando, please, your thoughts?
Lando: Um, I think Charles put it well, to be honest. Uh, if anyone thinks he's... um, yeah, there's no reason anyone should think he's underrated. I think for the people who know him, know what he's capable of doing, know his effort level, um, his approach and dedication to wanting to be one of the best, exactly like he's proved, uh, today, and over the last couple of weeks. Um, I'm sure you have, uh, plenty of drivers who probably wouldn't have tried as hard and dedicated so much of their time and effort to, um, to trying to recover and get back in the race car. Um, and I think that's just one example of it.
But for the people who know what he's capable of doing, um, you would never ever say he's underrated. I think, uh, yeah, of course, results are always a bit of a point to show and people on the outside just easily judge things from what you see on TV. But, um, when you've worked with him, when you know what he's capable of doing, and when things click, they click very well and he has performances like he does this weekend. And I would say he has - all year, he's proved to be, um, uh, I'd say, a step up from maybe what he has been last year. So, uh, yeah, you're silly if you underrate him.
Interviewer: Do we have any more from the floor? Yes, we do. Yep?
Question 2 (Dominic Criniti – SEN Radio) Just a question for Lando. Congratulations on the podium first off. I just wanted to know if... uh, what your level of sympathy is towards Oscar. Obviously he had the chance to finish on the podium. Is it a bit of a bittersweet feeling for the team in that sense?
Lando: Um, uh, it depends how you look at it. Like, uh, I was a lot quicker, and I would have overtaken him anyway. It's just, uh, you don't wanna delay the process of that happening, and the longer I, kind of, spent behind him, the worse it was making my chance of catching Charles and trying to be ahead of Charles.
So, um, yeah, I don't think the result changed at all. Um, he made my life easier and I think he helped us as a team, which I thanked him for a lot, and we have a lot of respect for one another in these, kind of, situations. Um, but I don't think the result changed, uh, at all.
Uh, but yeah, for any driver who's racing in front of their home fans, uh, you wanna be on the podium (smiles). So I don't think, uh... yeah, I would ever take anything away from that, or for what Oscar has provided and helped for in the team. Um, but, uh, I don't think the end result changed, no matter what.
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mooncalf87 · 1 day
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Cherrisnake??? 🥺🥺🥺🥺💕💕💕💕💕 Tell me more
SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG my brain short circuited and I couldn't fathom this ask lol
EVEN MORE CHERRISNAKE HCS <3
Forgive me if some of these are repeats, I dont remember what I did on the first two lists LOLOL also I am gonna do a few with my Pentious fan kid Adelaide, but I'll indicate where that starts
Snuggle bug. Pentious craves physical touch and comfort CONSTANTLY, which Cherri enjoys giving.
If you put them in a room together and lock the door there is a good 80% chance they will find out how to make a bomb out of carpet fuzz and drywall
They are big on PDA, but they- and everyone really- dont really notice it. They love giving quick kisses to each other, Cherri often finds her seat all cuddled up in Pentious's lap. It is a normal thing at the hotel, no one thinks much of it.
Cherri isn't interested in getting redeemed, which is something that Pentious 100% respects. They make it work
Pentious tried to propose but dropped the ring like 5 times. Cherri even handed it back to him once (he didn't realize)
Adhd couple
Their ideal date night is getting drunk off their asses and blowing up the Vee district
Pen is far from being a virgin, but he fumbles around in bed like one. Cherri finds it HILARIOUS
Pentious goes to Husk for relationship advice, and so does Cherri. Husk gets ALLLLLL the drama.
Cherri likes sweet/sugary stuff but Pen doesn't- pen has made jokes like "I'll have to break up with you, it just won't work. we are enemies 😔"
Sense their eras are so far apart, they love to teach each other about their time
Pentious, due to growing up in thr 1800s, didn't get a great education. He is great with building and stuff, but he doesn't know how to write or read very well. Cherri teaches him, and writing is one of his favorite things now.
Pen fell first. That man was smitten from day one. It took cherri a good 4 decades to realize her feelings
Adelaide stuff starts here! (Little bit of info: they are pents kids who were angels and he reunited with them in heaven. Adelaide is 3. She has a brother named Arthur, but I won't be including hcs about him, because he is not my character! His creator is @/emositecc, go to their page of you wanna learn about him!)
Cherri loves Pents kids SO. MUCH. She loves being a mother figure to them
Cherri is closest with Adelaide but she loves them both so so much
Adelaide CAN talk, but she is preferably non-verbal! The only time Cherri has ever heard her talk was when she called her "mama" once (cherri cried)
They were both in Pent and Cherris wedding
I do hc requests!
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