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#he l p  m e
qkmlh · 2 months
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Still ducking hilarious to me that Zoro & Sanji began their beef because they thought the other was misogynistic and it came to a head of no return when Zoro felt his title of ‘Luffy’s specialest boi’ threatened by Sanji’s comment
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pencilofawesomeness · 5 months
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💀 for natsu
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Woe, Goth/Punk/Emo Dragon Boys Be Upon Ye
I got these back to back so I combined them because why not. Let them be bros. Also I don't know the nuance of these fashions so I half looked at refs and half made things up; twas a lot of fun~
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raddest-laddest · 3 months
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so i hardly show ocs just cus they’re not what i’m thinking abt most of the time, but i’m gonna throw them on here anyways.
meet my guys:
nila and florian
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malaya and nek
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larry and the tomato god
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alvaro and cass
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racism flower
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and stan (wahoo)
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sunnny-vi · 2 years
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This is my favorite scene from @tuzesdays ‘s fic, “you move to the dayshift but aren’t paid any more, go figure” on AO3! I relate a little too strongly with the skipping meals thing tbh, but yeah. Angsty caretakers who blue screen when presented with the sheer stubbornness of a reader insert is one of my favorite tropes.
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AshtonIrwin: It’s a new year!!!!! big love to everywhere out there reading this! To More friendship, love, candles, music and experiences! Thank you for my life! ��🏻 thanks for the pics sis @ lauren_dawkins_ ♥️
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ezroar · 2 years
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after a team-up that ended with a bad guy finding a new career in community services and parts of crime alley being covered in green
jason: you're just as much as a poser as i thought you'd be. but maybe you have a modicum of style.
kyle: you're not so bad yourself, poozer
jason: (raises an eyebrow) would you like to stay for dinner?
bruce, lurking in the back, in full batman garb and eyes shining with ungodly light: would you like to stay forever?
--
kyle, on a panicked ring vc with hal: and then he asked me to stay forever and i thought i was going to live the rest of my life in a cell in arkham--
hal: WHAT DID YOU DO????????
kyle: I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!!!
--
bruce: i like him. marry him. damian needs an art buddy.
jason: you are so EMBARRASSING!!!
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Season one — brothers
Season two — mothers
Season three — fathers? 👀
*GASP*
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have you.....have you broken the bear down to its bare essentials?
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slashingdisneypasta · 6 months
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WAIT...
Bill Moseley can sing??...
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deus-ex-mona · 3 months
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youtube
a n y w a y s listen to nagisa’s new song it’ll change your life
#this new v tuber singer dude is excellent at singing ngl. his voice is very upbeat and goes well with the song#[​enojun version waiting room intensifies]#ok but. is it s e r i o u s l y just me or did they actually use a ukulele for this song#idk but that ukulele-sounding instrument reminds me of this guy who would walk around playing his ukulele at school back in the days of yore#the backing track also sounds familiar somehow… like one of those kindness movements/life insurance commercials maybe?#no idea wh y but i can picture nagisa singing this by the beach. y’know. nagisa singing at the nagisa—#this song is def gonna make me laugh or cry (or both) when it gets an mv…#it could be either hilarious or heartbreaking with no in-between#but man. nagisa. his long time crush comes back home looking (presumably) like a maiden in love and he’s just.#‘:( i’m not the one who made her like this :((( but she’s super cute though’#i m mad coping with the thoughts that hiyoko started to fall for nagisa with the distance between them (absence and the fonder heart or sth)#a n d that she only seemed fine when she went back bc she didn’t want him to see her upset about having to leave for the city b u t.#auasusuxuxuxuxhaughhhhhshhshshshshsh im c o p i n g#if hiyo ends up with one of the lips im gonna write a nagisa x the leftover lip enemies to lovers manifesto d o n t t e s t m e o k—#aaaaaaauauaaaaaaaaaaa im sorry i lied when i said i was done with my 2k23 nagisa crisis i’ll be done after this. maybe.#the dude from gamushara
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creampie--baby · 1 month
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so horny 😵‍💫 can’t stop thinking about throating dick, riding dick, an creampies 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
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clownsuu · 10 months
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PLEASE TELL ME THERE ARE C AI’s OF THE MOB AU (MOSTLY WALLY AND HOWDY)
Yeyeyeye, there is one of howdy and wally! And I think Barnaby too by someone else-
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ethanhibiki · 2 months
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the funer al i s next thur sdah :[
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mondaymelon · 3 months
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Arlecchino.
yes.
yes anon, go on.
i'd like to hear more.
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raddest-laddest · 8 days
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so yk how in the quirrel comic, he says “little food i need, and little rest” ?
i wonder if that’s because monomon was protecting him…
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waterfallofspace · 10 months
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#23 from my prompt meme with E/lias (maybe P/eter deciding to make Elias sneeze)??
Thank you for the request~~
Gently humming “wreeeckkk the maannn, wreeck the maaan” under my breath~ <3
2.4k, prompt #23 from ~this list~, story under cut!
23. "You really don’t want to do that, trust me."
(References to swearing, and T/MA spoilers, so please proceed with caution for those!)
~~~~~~~
It wasn’t The Eye that alerted him to the company waiting in his office. Nor was it Rosie, though it should have been. Elias makes a mental note to have a talk with her about her job description. No, unfortunately for the head of the institute, what clued him in was an unmistakable scent of mischief in the air. Mischief tinged with a hint of salt. 
“Peter,” Elias offers with a glance at the figure flicking into focus in the corner. He steps into his office, leaning against the doorframe. “I don’t recall planning a meeting for today.” 
To the untrained ear it would seem a polite yet dismissive greeting, but Peter is well versed in the many tones of Elias Bouchard. As a captain, one has to be able to see each undertow through an otherwise calm surface, a technique not limited to the ocean. 
“Your memory remains sharp as ever, Elias. We did not. However, I’ve come to you with an offer. One I know you can’t turn down.” 
Raising an eyebrow, Elias lets the image of Jon slumped over his recorder fade into the background. Pulling himself to his full height, he strides to his desk and takes a seat behind it. 
“You have my undivided attention.”
“I do, don’t I? What an honour.” The captain sinks onto the desk, a faint smile clinging to the corners of his balanced expression. His gaze falls on Elias, who in turn feels himself starting to slip into the familiar sensation. 
Peter’s eyes aren’t just dark, they’re more… empty. It’s not that the light doesn’t reach them; they aren’t bathed in shadows. Instead, they seem to soak the light from around them and swallow it whole. As they trace up Elias’s figure, it’s as if they’re trying to consume the glow from his own, taking all of him with it. 
“Well? I am quite a busy man. If you would be so kind, present your offer.”
“Oh, I did use that word, didn’t I?” Despite not a trace of illumination, a gleam dances through Peter’s eyes. “My sincerest apologies, I fear it doesn’t quite match my intentions. Perhaps a better term would be… challenge.” 
“And what sort of ‘challenge’ would that be?” 
Within a moment the faint smell of salt is replaced by a burning sort of sweetness. Elias feels his body react before his mind has a chance to catch up, a single finger raising to crush the tip of his nose. The contact only serves to exaggerate the itch, and the hand is quickly dropped back to his side. 
A smile spreads across Peter’s face in response, fingers uncurling to reveal something long, soft, and distinctly floral. His lips part with an inhale Elias finds himself unable to echo as Peter whispers, “An easy one. Don’t sneeze.” 
“Sihhh… hiH-! Simple enough, I suhhppose. And what do I ge- gehh… hH-! get if I succeed?” 
“Whatever you would like.”
“You seem quihhte confident, Peter,” Elias purrs, attempting to maintain a touch of decorum through the maddening tickle as it begins to spread deeper. Peter shifts his position, hand coming to rest against Elias’s knee, the offending blossom inching ever closer.
“Perhaps I am.” 
“I’ll be the first to admit I wahhsn’t expecting it, you caught m- me… hH- off guard,” Taking a pause, Elias swallows hard, willing the tears pooling around his lashes not to fall. With a measured breath, carefully manufactured nonchalance spread across his face, he meets Peter’s gaze. 
“Unfortunately for you, the element of surprise has passed, and I am quite able to fight off this mild irritation.” 
“Is that so? Oh dear, my apologies once more, I’m afraid things just keep slipping my mind today. I forgot to mention there’s one more rule to this little challenge,” Peter hums, the smile haunting his hollow face almost as sickeningly sweet as the fauna he waves around with precise recklessness. 
Elias feels his nose quiver as the pollen spreads through the air, an unfortunate side effect of The Eye presenting itself as each individual grain makes themselves known to him. Peter had paused, presumably for dramatic effect. Though now it’s more likely captivation, eye’s locked on his prey as Elias sniffles with increasing urgency.
“Ahh… hIH-! And what wouhhld that be?” 
“There are no limits to what I can do with my weapon of choice.” 
Gesturing to the flower hanging from his fingers, Peter’s face lights up with a smirk once more. The glow of mischief is not unfamiliar to him, but Elias still can’t seem to shake the unease that settles in his gut. Such a light seems to be at odds with the captain’s very personage in a way that makes his skin crawl. 
“If I rehhfuse?” Elias questions, lifting his thumb to swipe away a stray tear threatening to escape. The action spreads the buzzing deeper into his sinuses, a gasp breaking between his clenched teeth. Peter echos the inhale with a sharp breath of his own, turning the exhale into a chuckle.
“I suppose you could…” The sentence is unfinished, lingering in the air with almost as much irritation as the pollen. Neither need finish it, they both know the unspoken words ring true. But you won’t.
Another hitch breaks through his defenses as Elias feels his eyes start to shut, the familiar itch spreading out through his mind matching the burn in his sinuses. The all consuming itch to observe. To watch. 
“hihH-!” A finger presses against his nose, then two, until his whole palm is pressed against his face in an effort to block the cascade of tickles lining each breath. However before long his wrist is encased in a soft grip, Peter gently pulling it away from his face. 
“You saihhd nothing about not being able t- to… haHh- touch my n- nohh… nose.” 
“That’s because it’s not a rule. But if you’ll recall, I’m allowed to do whatever I desire with my weapon,” Peter chuckles again, wiping another tear that had broken free, Elias feeling his nose give a violent twitch in response. “And your hand was in the way of that.” 
Bringing the blossom up, Peter twirls it between his fingers, a faint horror flashing through Elias’s eyes as a fresh wave of pollen spreads through the air. He wants to hold his breath, but a touch of moisture starts to spread through his nose, the sensation nearly sending him over the edge. Peter isn’t holding his wrist anymore, and yet his hands seem to be frozen in place.
Before he can make a choice, Peter brings the lavender to his face, gently flicking it against one nostril. It manages to touch the inside of his nose leaving his mouth twitching and eyes snapping shut. The constant buzzing of his thoughts are suddenly swarmed with one single word. Sneeze. 
“eh’KSHH’ieu-!”
The first crawls out before Elias can raise a hand, but his fingers tighten across his nose in time to stifle the next, “hk’nGT-! ek’gNKT’dieu-!” that seize his breath. From atop the desk he manages to pick up Peter’s voice, though for the life of him he can’t make out any words between shaky gasps.
“hk’nngt’ieu-!”
“Elias, the stifling,” Peter starts, pausing as Elias manages to cast a watery glare. He offers a grin dripping with playful mischief. And yet, a hint of sincerity just below the calm darkness gives Elias the will to stall the impending sneezes long enough for Peter to finish. “You really don’t want to do that, trust me." 
“I’m quihhte.. hh’kngt-! quite sure my n- nohh… eh’dnxt-ngXT’ieu-! nose would disagree,” Elias manages, fingers still tightly gripping said nose. Each stifle brings forth a new wave of irritation, his eyes begging to open between each outburst. 
The Eye never seemed keen on something that would force his eyes shut. Unfortunately for his patron, it seems allergies were not something even body hopping could outrun. Elias often found himself figuring it as some sort of cosmic joke, or perhaps a punishment. Whatever the case, it led to quite famous attacks, no matter what body he found himself in. 
“Actually I believe your nose would be on my side with this matter,” Peter insists, running a single finger down the bridge of said appendage as Elias finds his mouth hanging open, tears now freely streaming from his delicate lashes. “Though your eyes might have a few complaints.” 
“hIHh-! P- Peter I cahhn’t… I’m… I’m gonna-” Elias feels his nostrils flare, each breath bringing a fresh wave of thickly sweetened air. His sinuses practically hiss in response to Peter tracing a single nail across them. “hh’kNGT’ieu-!”  
Before he can even manage a full breath, the tip of the lavender is pressed against his nose, Peter stroking it back and forth in a motion that has Elias damn near moaning. A light chuckle falls from the captain’s lips, the vibrations travelling through his hand into the stem. Elias just gasps in response, not capable of much else at this point. “hehHH-” 
“Much as I’m enjoying watching you prolong your own misery, I’m a bit of a perfectionist. My goal was to make you sneeze, and honestly those little squeaks feel like a hollow victory. I’m going more for the real thing.” 
“heHH-! I- I hhhave to… ahH!”
“Yes, I imagine you do.” With that, Peter sets the blossom back on the desk, pulling Elias’s chair closer until they’re sitting eye to eye. With a single fluid motion Peter secures both wrists, Elias only managing to mutter out a groan of disapproval before his features go slack. “Now, have I earned my show yet, or do you need a bit more convinc-”
“hH’KSHH’ieu-! ek’TISHhhieew-!”
Elias aims for his shoulder, spinning as far as he can manage while Peter holds his wrists hostage. Still polite, even in the midst of an allergy attack, an apology scrapes out before another desperate “heHKZSHHuh-!” 
“See, doesn’t that feel better?”
“My- my haahhh… hands! aH’KNZSH’dieuu-! ”
“Oh right,” Peter says, releasing his arms and grinning again as Elias frantically brings them to his face. Rubbing his nose against a wrist doesn’t seem to relieve the itch. Instead, Elias switches to mashing a palm against it with a groan.
“Can you imagine if people found out the ‘All Powerful Elias’ was completely taken down by a single bloom of lavender?” 
“dTZSHhhuh-!” A wave of irritation flashes through Elias’s face, though it’s unclear whether it’s from the tickle or Peter’s words.
His lashes flutter again, voice hoarse and wavering as he manages to get out a single sentence. “Oh christ, don’t even say the w- word… hh’ETSHhhieew-!”  
“Sorry, sorry. It’s quite amusing though. Not often I get to see this shade of red cross your face.”
“Glad you’re… hehh- hH’INZSH-! entertained,” Elias mutters, rummaging through his pockets with growing urgency. Apparently not finding his prize, he turns an accusatory gaze to Peter. “Do you happ- happen-” 
Elias pauses, stuck in an itchy limbo that seems to consume him. Peter waits a full minute, but soon it becomes clear there will be no progress without interference. With a glint in his eye, he reaches down and runs his nail down the bridge of Elias’s nose.
“hk’TISHH’dieu-! huhhh… heH-”
A breath, cautious sniff, then Elias attempts to resume his sentence, only to groan in frustration as the tickle chooses this moment to resurge. “Thank- eh’KSHH’ieu-! guhh…”  
Holding a wrist up to his nose, Elias coughs lightly, the water in his eyes seeming to take on a luminescent tint. Clearing his throat, he attempts to regain some of his long forsaken propriety. “As I was saying, do you happen to hahh… fuck- ih’GZSH-!”
“Elias Bouchard! What language! Even on my ship we don’t resort to such a foul tongue,” Peter taunts, savouring the scowl Elias aims his way. It’s soon overtaken by another desperately ticklish look as Elias buries his face into his collar for another round. 
“hihHZSHHhiew-! Oh bloody hell- kNGSHH’dieu-!” 
“Bless. Into your collar Elias?”
“I didn’t have much of- of a… ek’NZSH-! choice. Seems I’ve misplaced my handkerchief today.”
“Oh dear, that certainly does seem like an inconvenience,” Peter murmurs, letting his mouth contort into a grin as his tongue traces the outline of his lips. Elias offers an exasperated sigh in return.
“Quite. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about that?”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean. 
“ehH-! Really, agaihhhn?” Rolling his eyes, Elias reaches for his collar as the tickle swells once more, shooting the lavender a pointed glare before his eyes glaze over. “hH’KZSH’ieu-!”
“Blessings. You know what, I think I just so happen to have an extra today. Would you be interested in-” Before he can get another word out Elias has ripped the cloth from his hand, burying his face in the soft folds for another “eh’YIZSHieww-!” 
He lets a couple blows scrape out into the cloth, a heady sigh bursting from his chest as he finishes, managing to actually get some airflow through his nose. The sound leaves them both wincing, but it’s better than nothing. It also seems to mark the end of the fit, though Elias still eyes the blossom laying on the table with more than a hint of caution. 
“Are you planning on… disposing of that?”
Peter follows his gaze, another unsettling laugh spilling out as he crushes the flower in his palm. “I would be happy to. After all, it served its purpose well.”
“Well. In that case, I suppose there’s only one matter of business left to attend to before this ‘meeting’ comes to a conclusion.”
“Oh? And what would that be?” Peter asks, head tilting as he watches Elias dab at his eyes with a clean section of the cloth. Once he’s content, he brings it down to his scarlet tinged nose to give it another deep scrub. Peter gestures to his face with a smirk. “If it’s the handkerchief, you can keep it.”
“How kind. No, I was thinking more of your prize.”
“My prize?” 
“Indeed. You did win the challenge af- after… afterall- hhK’IEZSHuh-!”
Elias lets out another groan, a few curses following on its tail as he blows his nose again, the whole ordeal leaving him sniffling. Peter can’t help but feel a pang in his chest as Elias leans back in his chair with a heavy sigh, letting his eyes close in a way that just looks exhausted.
“How about you owe me a favour. I’m sure I can think of something I’d want,” Peter offers, a softness in his tone that has Elias opening a single eye to observe the captain.
After a long pause, Elias simply nods, returning his head to the back of his chair as his eyes drift shut once more. Peter stands, offering a wave over his shoulder as he doesn’t quite walk out the door, but still exits the room. 
“Thanks for the fun, Elias. Let’s do this again soon.”
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jrueships · 1 year
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diggs is unimpressed by the unusual josh allen show of toxic masculinity
#hes on his princess belle type shit#oh my God allen read the feminist fucking manifesto ugh#'the feminine urge to fucking man 🐶?'#no allen 😾.#joshs 'look at me 🐶! look at me!!! 🥰' kindergarten boy core of 'me do strong thing! me strong 😄!!' nudge#vs stefs FIST !!!#boy if you dont STOP!!#STOP FOOLIN AROUND WITH THE NEIGHBOR NEXT DOOR !! HE IS MCKENZIES MAN!!!!!!#diggs externally: 🙄... 😠😡 ALLEN.#diggs internally: God I Wish That Was Me.#allen: what 😄? i can pick you up too if youd like 😃! wont be a thing!#diggs: STFU. NO 😾. S O M E of us are trying to PRACTICE! for FOOTBALL! not WWE comma A L L E N 😡!#also diggs under breath: BOTH of us 😳? at the SAME TIME 😳?#... i bet he could bridal style no problem... i bet he could do those elaborate stunts in p*rnos and-#HE WOULDNT NEED NO WALL#WE'LL JUST KEEP IT AT THAT 🤭🤭#and then diggs realizes he is thinking this a little Too Loud and somehow since the thoughts are so loud someone somewhere#will be able to telepathically pick them up and listen in and embarrass him for his maniacal lustings#so he gets self conscious and turns away with a prissy little 'HMF 😤!'#probably lightly bats josh with an offhand swipe like a cat would to a featherstick#josh who could easily shatter his hand into more pieces: 😃 aw dang! *gives up* 🥺#verrrry inch resting how josh being captain america x shirtless thor levels of h*rny handsome manness is a diggs aggravator#but josh telling diggs hes thankful for him as par thanksgiving general niceties makes diggs wanna leap into his arms#and start mewling#i knew what diggs was from the Beginning (sl*t trope who is surprisingly won over by softness#i know youre a c*mboy. i know you are.#diggs/allen#allen always feeding his lumberjack fan dreams i love it. i am nourished THANK U#AND THANK U O CHERISHED MOOT OF MINE 4 THIS IMAGE I LOVE BEING GIVEN THEM!! IT'S ALWAYS SO NICE#there are no moots like my moots FIND your OWN 😡🤬!!!
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