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#heffron drive
edxtxons · 2 years
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Twitter Pack Big Time Rush.
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heffrondriving · 2 years
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❝ Welp, went to the farm ‘fer the day and got meself an avocado! ❞ 🥑
❀ @xsomethingstrange 💚 ❀
#lookie lil farmer schmidt all soft and vv proud of his beautiful froot bounty (˵ᵕ̴᷄ ᗜ ��̴᷅˵)**♡ that stupid accent though i love him!!!#ken struggling to get it from the tree while litos encourages him from behind the camera and cheers for him when he gets it ahhh <3#and then carlos proceeds to rag on him for wearing the most ridiculous clothes for maui. well where *are* the board shorts and sandals bro?#*licks the fruit* ''it's not ripe'' ah i see you went to the tenth doctor school of figuring things out kenny hajshsja kisses ur cheek#he's gunna hunker down by the campfire (penavega living room) and pluck some country tunes in celebration (beautiful christmas >:'3)#lyds look its our fave lanky doodle 💙 ik this isnt what you asked for but i blame you for making me melt over these vids again. hugs u!#btr#big time rush#kendall schmidt#heffron drive#gifs#gifset#edit#rusher#btrgif#btr edit#mine#maui sessions#kendork#stop it forever#the tesla's coming!#NO BUT THE WAY THESE MAUI SESSION VLOGS CRADLE MY HEART AND SOUL AND PROVIDE ME WITH ETERNAL KENLOS COMFORT FOREVER!!!!! IT IS MY DOCTRINE#I'M REWATCHING THEM THANKS TO LYDIA AND REMEMBERING HOW THAT BOYFRIEND COVER GOT ME BACK INTO BTR + SEEING MY FAVES BEING CUTE GOOFBALLS#*sings to boyfriend's tune* 🎶looking for a chameleon🎶 *cue carlos giggling and singing along* *cue me exploding from emotional damage*#LOS SAYING 'MAYBE WE'LL DO A REUNION TOUR.....WOULD YOU GUYS GO?' PLEASE OGMHYRGHOD THE PROPHECY IS REAL PUTANGINA HINDI KO NA KAYA TALAGA#MOM COME PICK ME UP I'M EMOTIONAL o(థ Д థo) ALSO ITS MAKING ME NOSTALGIC FOR WHEN WE USED TO GO TO OUR GRANDMAS FARM AND GET INDIAN MANGOES#SANTOL AND TREE FRUITS WITH THAT LONG POKEY NET STICK THINGY AND NOW I'M IN MORE TEARS SORRY THESE TAGS ARE A MESS BUT I'M A MESS FOR BTR#life's just super stressful and i miss seeing more of kenny in my blog. and in general. so this makes me very comforted and happy :">#(also trying to get a little ✨schmancee✨ with the filters since i now have gmic for my gımp. idk if this looks any good but i like it???)T
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no no no you don't understand. passing time (unplugged) by heffron drive (feat. logan henderson) guts me every single time. if i refer to it as "the kogan duet lol" that's the way i'm coping with the way that song makes me feel. they only have one song with just the two of them because its too powerful. ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME???
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songforeverything · 1 year
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— Quiet Please by Heffron Drive
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mermaidinthecity · 2 months
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Parallel by Heffron Drive
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carwoodron · 1 year
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the fact that in the bastogne episode the sun is nowhere to be found for obvious reasons and the lightining is very dim and dark except for eugene's face during the last scene after babe mentions he called him babe and they laugh. after all of that the sun. i need a moment
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junmail · 5 months
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2, 3, 8, and 33?
2. what was the first concert you ever attended?
big time rush !!
3. what was the most recent concert you attended?
enhypen 😵‍💫 the boys put on a great show but engenes … uh .. yeah ..
8. which concert did you vibe most with the crowd?
svt, verivery and keshi !!
33. which concert do you wish had a concert film?
any of them bc my memory is terrible lol but probably the first time i seen state champs when they were an opener bc i don’t have any videos since i didn’t know who they were at the time 😭
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unitcd-a · 2 years
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heffrondriving · 2 years
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Kendall Schmidt + the ‘stache™
#just. don't ask. i have no answer except for this is how u know i truly love him. happy april fools???#but the only fool here is me bc i amn't fooling around with my insane anorak for this man. jkjk does a gay liddle#silly jester jig that makes the king order for my immediate ɛxɛcutıon booo hisss tomato tomato#btr#big time rush#kendall schmidt#heffron drive#gifs#gifset#photoset#edit#mine#rusher#kendork#stop it forever#ngl me having to even look at some of these while editing felt like a blatant human rıghts vıɵlatıɵn. /tw moustache#i hate this. i hate having to look at it but i keep looking. it's like a wreck and i'm disgusted but also entirely riveted#it might just from me spending hours to make this but it kinda suits ken??? it's like the worst look but maybe i'm starting to like it????#it's been my constant 2022 icon so dare i even say......i actually really miss the 'stache a lot??!?!1 what monster have i become#well at least it's not as terrible as james' gɵdawful 2020 moustache YEAH I SAID WHAT I SAID COME @ ME HIMBO STANS I AM ONE TOO AND YET!!!#even though shirtless kendall squicks me tf out and that lipbite while rolling up his sleeves makes me wanna d*e#actually that entire vid makes me wanna squeeze into a wee ball and collapse into a black hole singularity. i can make a gifset out of it-#that first gross gif is redeemed only by his adorable cheeky grin like he knows what's he's doing the lilshit#this is my silly meow meow grampa. he sells computer parts and secondhand cars and looks for bass pro shops discounts in his downtime <3#this might just be my Most Cursed Post and that's saying a lot. sorry to those who have been burdened but i have my caveat emptor so#brb starting a cɥlʈ for kendall's moustache praise be to the hirsute gods and heed their hairy doomsday predictions#i'm miffed he actually grew a stache b4 i even got to post my stache crackfic so now it's just >:(( dang apollo and his prophecy dodgeball#allen really needs to go out and get a life sometime soon.txt#shoutout to liz for inspiring me to make this bc of our lengthy chats discussing our fave Mans weird stache :'>#intended to be comfort post so don't tag this with names if u see this bit. or just fuckin do idc i'm not ur mom
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My college had this carnival thing, and the first 200 students to show up got a custom street sign
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Of course I had to do this for the pun...
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songforeverything · 30 days
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— Happy Mistakes by Heffron Drive
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mermaidinthecity · 7 months
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Love Letter by Heffron Drive
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bellewintersroe · 6 months
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Band of brothers headcanons, how they react to accidentally upsetting you.
I just felt like writing something a little angsty because who doesn’t love that 😈
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Eugene Roe:
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This mf would be so confused, hear me out ok.
he’s so so smart and kind and caring, legit perfect, but humans do make mistakes! So in Gene’s case I feel like he maybe doesn’t understand why you may be frustrated/ hurt in a specific scenario.
“but I don’t understand, you said it was fine, like two secundz ago.” The boy is DUMBFOUNDED and then because you’re so frustrated and probably just tired for one reason or another, you burst into tears.
genes eyes widen and then he realised he’s probably messed up by not at least trying to understand.
ahhhh he’d spring off his feet, and kinda dither in front of you, a little confused. He’d be SO apologetic and his hands would kinda smooth over your hair, fixing it from where you’d messed it up slightly.
Gene would kinda click that he made you upset pretty quickly, so I think he’d be prepared to do anything he can to make you feel better as soon as possible. Lewis Nixon:
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I feel like with Lewis his drinking settles massive when he meets you, he’s happy and doesn’t need alcohol as an outlet.
But maybe in the early days of your relationship, like you’re in Austria or somewhere, he gets a little too drunk and it completely ruins the plan you put so much effort in for you both.
the morning after is when I think Lewis knows he’s fucked up. He’d spring out of his bed, no hangover could set him back, and he’s hurrying to find you immediately.
turns up at your door all dishevelled and your friend is like ‘no you’re not speaking to her’ but with some pleading it works. She’s ballsy, because he is her superior after all.
apologises like crazy, asks what he can do to fix it? I think he’d genuinely feel such a strong sense of guilt, that whatever he did won’t ever happen again because the sad little look on your face sticks with him for a longggg time.
Babe Heffron:
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“Babe, I think you upset her…”
“Wha’? What’d I do?!” Kinda baffled ngl, but either way all he cares about is that you’re upset. I think it would when the two of you were still friends, and he friend zoned you HARD after months of flirting and showing interest. Obviously he doesn’t mean to do this because you’re beautiful and so perfect, and he’s kinda in love with you.
chases after you down the street, well not literally, but he wants to see if you’re okay.
he’s so cute, and you’re so nervous to admit why it upset you, so he kinda takes a good few minutes just putting the pieces together until he’s like. “Oh… OH! You mean? You mean that ya’ upset because ya’ thought I only saw you as just a friend?!”
he’s in awe that you have the same feelings, he’s truly blind to it, but feels bad after because he didn’t want to hurt your feelings. He just honestly thought there wasn’t a chance on earth than you’d feel the same.
Joe Liebgott:
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Probably says something in the heat of the moment that he doesn’t mean.
Panic immediately after when he realises what he actually said. But you’re so pissed off you just snap right back at him and storm off, getting the space you need.
now Joe can be rash in the heat of the moment, but he isn’t a fool, nor is he mean spirited or nasty. He genuinely cares about you, he hates that he said something just outta pure anger.
you bet he’d be lingering outside your bedroom door, sighing dramatically and knocking as he anxiously awaits your response.
cuddles you like crazy, apologises pretty soon, especially if the argument has cooled down. He’d make it up for you by taking you on a long drive in his cab, buys you flowers, anything you want because you’re his girl and you deserve it.
although Joe can be quite rash, he is a huge softie, so I don’t think it’s EVER a common occurrence when he says something hurtful to you. It’s probably a one off? People always make mistakes, Joe doesn’t take that lightly on himself however.
super gentle with you afterwards, wishes he could truly take his words back. Vows to never upset you like that ever again, and you best believe he sticks to it.
George Luz:
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I feel like it would be a joke taken a little too far by accident.
he’d find you crying and he panics omg he’s like “what?! No, no, what’s wrong?!”
Then you’d be all like “is that what you think of me?!” And it takes a moment to click in his mind when he’s like- “oh SHIT!”
panics that he upset you, he’s upset himself for making you feel that way.
but he’s just a big ball of love and reassurance, you know from how genuinely serious he is that he didn’t mean to upset you.
maybe tries to crack another joke after, but this time it’s actually funny.
Ron Speirs:
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Ron is a clever man, he really understands your emotions and what hurts them.
so when you’re upset in front of a group of people, Ron has no choice but to remain professional, no matter how much it hurts.
kinda can’t do anything other than just stare at you hoping you’re getting the message. He’s all wide eyed and flustered and wants to move on from whatever they’re all doing so he can attend to you.
it probably eats him up all day after that, more than it does you.
no matter how much you understand why he must act like that, it still stung just a tincy, tiny bit.
ron needs you alone. When he finds you he’s wrapping his arms around you immediately. I don’t think he’d be the best with expressing his emotions sometimes, so he’d mutter apologies into your ear, holding you close so you can’t look back and make eye contact with him.
eye contact would make him nervous- plus why does he kinda feel choked up?!
nah but seriously, Ron would beat himself up for having to act like that around you. He hates it. When he meets you you’ll 1000% see more of an emotional side to what the army does (obviously) so it’s upsetting for him when he can’t freely express himself in front of you.
Bill Guarnere:
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“What’d I do?!”
“I think you upset her, Bill…”
“Ahhh, shit…” Bill is DUMBFOUNDED. he has quite a brash sense of humour, especially with his buddies. So when he maybe takes a joke too far in front of them all about you he doesn’t click straight away why you’ve left the table.
like you’d move to sit with some of your other buddies and he’d probably come over with a sigh, sitting down next to you. Lmao I feel like you’d just give him the cold shoulder??
he’s a head strong guy, right, but I think even he’d be a little bit puzzled on what to do. Just watches you in confusion whilst you completely blank him before removing himself from the situation.
probs gives you time and space to cool off before one of his buddies tells him he should get you some flowers or something.
“I ain’t doin’ tha’!”
turns up 30 mins later with a bunch of flowers and lots of hugs and kisses.
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We'll Hold Hands Until the Sun Comes Out (Matt Murdock x Reader) 
Ship: Matt Murdock x Reader
Summary:
After a horrible week of bad luck breaking you down, Matt is ready to be there and pick up the pieces.
Word Count: 1,494
Warning: none
A/N: Title inspired by one of my favorite songs, "Time Wasting" by Heffron Drive. Listen to it here! It makes the fic better me thinks. Fic itself is for @pastafossa as she deserves all the Matt comfort after some consistent bad luck.
It was too loud. 
Even with the lights off and the tv on mute, the world was just too loud as you continued to bury your head into the pillow. 
It had been an awful week. Just plain awful. 
You should have known something was wrong when it started with Matt telling you he had to go out of town for a few days, some conference upstate that was an apparent golden networking opportunity for him and Foggy.  Who were you to protest? 
But then the power went out in the apartment after they left, and only Matt had the passwords to all the accounts you needed to pay for it.
Did you mention your phone was dead, too? 
Sure you were able to get it charged after going to Karen’s. Sure you were able to call Matt and listen as he profusely apologized for letting the date of the power bill slip his mind. Sure, you were able to get confirmation that it would be turned on by the end of the day, and indeed it was. 
But then your co-worker called out sick the next day, leaving you to deal with an angry boss. Then your lunch got stolen. Twice. In one week. 
And who could forget the lovely cab that skidded to a stop right next to you on the sidewalk? While it was raining? 
So now, as the evening rolled around on Friday night, all you wanted to do was sleep. 
But it was just too loud. Each honk of a Hell’s Kitchen taxi came through the walls as if it were the bricks that fell as it toppled down. The slide of your clothes against the grooves in the silk sheets dug into your brain like nails on a chalkboard. 
So you did what you could do as you dug your head deeper into the pillow, and hoped that sleep would eventually win the battle. 
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Matt couldn’t exactly complain about the week he’d had. While he always hated being away from you, the trip to Syracuse for a conference was a success. While networking wasn’t either his or Foggy’s stronger suit, as it usually involved kissing ass to lawyers who wouldn’t take a second glance at them, he had felt that this conference was filled with the rare types you only heard of, lawyers who cared. 
He couldn’t help but feel a new hope for the profession he had worked hard to be in. 
So now, on this Friday night, he, Karen, and Foggy sat in Josie’s Bar drinking to their success. He had tried to call you to join them, as he and Foggy had chosen to go straight there once arriving back to the city, but was sent straight to voicemail. But it was rather late, and he assumed you were already asleep. 
Little did he know. 
“You should have heard her, Karen. It was so refreshing to actually listen to a lawyer who actually fought for her client. I mean, sure, Jen doesn’t exactly take on clients with the cleanest records, but you can see she actually believes in their right to redemption.” said Foggy. “Too bad she had to go straight back to LA. She seemed like the type who would be hella fun in a bar.” 
It was the mention of you that pulled Matt back into the conversation. 
“Jen would have to be immune to alcohol if she wanted to out-drink her!” said Karen. She wasn’t wrong, his girlfriend did have quite the ability to hold her liquor. 
“Where is she, anyway?” asked Foggy. “She never misses a night a Josie’s.” 
“I tried calling her!” said Matt. “It went straight to voicemail. She’s probably already asleep. She seemed pretty busy lately.” 
“Well with the week she’s had, I wouldn’t blame her for conking out either,” said Karen. 
Well, that sure did get Matt’s attention. 
“What do you mean?” 
As Karen spilled in detail your trail of bad luck that had followed you throughout the week, the grip on his cane tightened. Both of his friends knew better than to question it as he immediately slipped cash on the table and just about threw himself out the door. 
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It was too quiet.
Usually, when Matt approached his apartment, he’d be able to hear you in some shape or form, whether it would be humming as you danced through the kitchen or the murmur of the television that played softly as you snoozed on the couch. 
But now there was nothing. He would have thought no one was home if he hadn’t finally picked up your heartbeat when he entered the lobby. 
As he opened the door, the scene before him made his heart ache. He could sense everything. Your work clothes were skewed across the floor rather than in the hamper, something you had bought to make HIM pick up the habit. Dishes from leftovers were piled in the sink, and while he was more than guilty of waiting till the morning to clean up dinner, you were always the opposite. 
He made it to your shared bedroom, finding you curled up in bed under more blankets than he realized you owned. 
“Sweetheart?” 
The silence echoed throughout the room, raising his concern as he knew you weren’t asleep. 
He walked to your side of the bed, lowering to his knees as he tried to find your face. 
“Darling, are you all right?” 
“Matty?” your voice came out in cracks. 
“What is it, sweetheart?” 
“Please help me.” 
If his heart ached before, it was falling to pieces now. He immediately crawled up into bed with you, pulling you into his lap as he curled himself around you. Tears immediately started falling from your eyes, soaking his shirt as he tried to soak up your pain. 
“What do you need, sweetheart? How can I help?” He had never seen you like this before, each of your sobs feeling like a stab to his heart. 
“I’m just so tired, Matt. This week was so bad.” 
“Why didn’t you call me earlier? I would have come straight home.” 
“You were working. You were busy.” 
“Never too busy for you.” 
You didn’t know how to respond to that. You knew Matt loved you and were as certain of it as if you could hear his heartbeat too. But you weren’t going to interrupt his week when it was important for work. 
“What can I do, sweetheart?” 
“Make the world quiet, please.” 
This was something he knew all too well. The feeling of the world being so loud that it took over any peace in his mind was something he knew like the back of his hand. You were always the first one to help him. You were always the first to let him lay his head in your lap as he blocked out the bad. You were always the first to pull him into your chest when he needed the shield.
Could he be just as strong for you? That, he wasn’t sure. 
But he was damn well ready to try. 
He maneuvered you so you were curled up next to him, kissing your cheek in apology as you let out a moan at being separated. 
“Just a second, sweetheart.” 
He slipped his shirt and pants off, leaving him in just his boxers before he turned to you. You let him do the same, too tired to do anything as he slipped your own clothes off and threw them to the ground. 
Usually, your side of the bed was the one closest to the window. You liked being woken up by the sun through the blinds and feeling the warmth on your face. But that didn’t matter now as he pulled you back into his arms, skin to skin, turning you so he was blocking the window from your space. 
You immediately felt better. The scrapes on a chalkboard were suddenly replaced by the soft beat of Matt’s heart as you laid your head against his chest.  The itch from the sheets faded away as the feeling was replaced by the softness of Matt’s skin. 
He dug his hand into your hair, giving your head soft scratches like you did to him, feeling your body go slack as each muscle fell loose. 
“Oh sweetheart, I love you so much. Please. Never feel like you need to fight alone when the world seems too strong. I’ll gladly fight by your side.” 
Matt couldn’t help but feel satisfied as he felt you start to relax in his arms. 
“That’s it, darling. It’s okay.” 
Matt curled around you tighter, smiling to himself as he felt you slip your hand into his, holding it like a lifeline to the calm you desperately needed after the storm.
He felt the grip of your hand lessen as you finally fell asleep as the darkness of the night took over, but he knew he’d force himself to stay awake if it meant holding it till sunrise. 
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A/N: I hope you enjoyed it! As always, let me know if I missed any spelling or grammar errors. I tried my best to catch them, but I'm not the best at it.
Feedback always appreciated too!
I hope you enjoyed the Matt comfort, @pastafossa. I adore you always, friend!
To the person who sent in the Matt x Jen phone sex request, it will be here soon!
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softguarnere · 7 months
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2 am
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Joe Liebgott x reader
A/N: (this is written for the fictional depictions from the show - no disrespect to the real life veterans!) This fic idea has been banging around in my head for a solid year now, but for some reason I'm only just now writing it. Oops. The title comes from "2am" by Foals. Thanks for reading, and I hope that you enjoy! Warnings: alcohol, mentions of the Holocaust, language (one f-bomb and that's it)
For the middle of summer, the night air is cool against your warm cheeks when you stumble out of the hotel lobby, arms slung around the necks of your friends as the three of you lean into each other for support and guidance as you make your way to the curb. The three of you are still laughing at some joke that Luz made back inside when the cab pulls up.
“Here you go.” Careful not to lose his grip on you, Luz opens the back door of the cab and guides you towards the back seat.
You really should be getting back to your hotel, but you don’t want this night to end. And who would, after all the fun you’ve been having with your old friends? It’s nice to see them again, to catch up with them, like you’re finally getting to know them without the constant threat of German artillery fire looming over your heads.
“I’ll take the next one,” you protest.
This makes Babe laugh. “Nope. Drunkest person needs to get home first. We gotta make sure you get in the cab before you pass out.”
You fix your old friend with the best intimidating look that you can manage in your current condition. “You drank way more than me, Heffron.”
Babe chuckles. “But I can actually hold my liquor.”
Well, touché. You can’t argue with that one.
“Can you make it home okay?” Luz asks.
“I’ll be fine,” you promise. After all, you’re not nearly as drunk as they seem to think that you are . . . At least, you don’t think you are.
As if he can see your thought process, Luz laughs. “I’ll swing by tomorrow morning to make sure that you’re still alive.”
Your friends close the door of the cab then. Babe taps the glass of the window twice to signal to the driver that you’re ready to go. On cue, the car pulls forward, slowly pulling out of the hotel’s drive. Only when it nears the exit of the parking lot does your driver finally ask his question.
“Where to?” A voice with a familiar raspy quality wants to know.  
The sound is enough to make you freeze, your breath stuck in your throat. Maybe you are drunk. Yes, that must be it – the alcohol making you hear what you want to hear, using some wild manifestation of your subconscious desires. Because you haven’t heard that voice in years. You haven’t seen its owner in just as many. And you certainly didn’t expect to run into him here, of all places.
Your eyes jump to the rear-view mirror. A lump the size of a golf ball appears in your throat. Because even in the faded light of the late summer night, there can be no mistake as to who is staring back at you, waiting expectantly for your answer. Even after all these years, even though you can only see his eyes, you would recognize him anywhere.
“Joe?” Somehow, the words manage to push past the lump in your throat, echoing through the car in the silence that has fallen.
Click-click, click-click. The turn signal methodically keeps time, a metronome as your fellow paratrooper waits for a reply. Though you still haven’t said anything, he takes a right out of the parking lot and eases onto the road.
“Guy behind us was looking impatient,” he says by way of explanation.
It’s Joe Liebgott, you can tell. From the voice, the eyes, the way he tensed when you said his name. Would he have reacted that way if anyone else had said it? Or is it only because of you and the things that happened between the two of you so long ago?
The car is moving and you probably shouldn’t, but you can’t stop yourself from leaning forward, trying to get a better look at him. He’s so close – closer than you ever thought he would be – but he seems unreal and worlds away, like a dream that you can almost, but not quite, reach.
“Is it really you?” You whisper.
Joe sighs, a familiar sound. “Yeah, (Y/N). It’s me.”
“San Fransisco,” you remember aloud, some far away memory of some offhand comment that he once made to someone filtering into your memory. “You always said that you would come back here.”
He only nods. Your heart thuds in your chest. There’s so much to say, to ask, yet it feels like you’re running out of time for it all.
“And now you’re here,” Joe finally says. “With . . . them.”
It takes your brain a second to work out that he means Luz and Babe. Two of the many members of Easy Company who came to the reunion this year. Unlike some people.
“You didn’t come to the reunion.”
“No.” He makes a noise that might be a laugh. “Kind of defeats the purpose when you’re trying to leave the war behind you.”
Leave the war behind you. A slap in the face would have hurt less. Is that why he stopped calling you? Stopped answering your letters? You met during the war, during boot camp, and made it through the whole thing together – from Georgia to the Eagle’s Nest. You had been under the impression that you could make it back to the States . . . Well, at least now you know that Joe had different ideas.
“Then why are you here?” You ask. It’s a fair enough question; Easy Company reunions always generate a lot of attention. Joe happening to be outside of the hotel that was hosting this year’s reunion can’t be a coincidence, can it?
His silence is all the answer that you need.
“You showed up, but you didn’t come inside. Why?” Before he can answer, you add, “And don’t say the thing about leaving it all behind you again. I got that part, okay?”
You can hear Joe’s mouth shut with a click. You hadn’t meant to snap the last part at him. But seeing him here . . . All the anger, the sadness, anything you ever felt about or towards Joe Liebgott that you’ve spent years repressing is now rising to the surface.
“I think you know why,” Joe mutters.
No! You want to snap. No, I don’t understand how you could have left me hanging like that, after all that we went through together, all that we meant to each other.
“I – “ He clears his throat, shakes his head. “I was only hoping to see you. Just . . . I don’t know. I thought that would be enough, if I saw you. I never expected you to get into my cab.”
“And now I’m here.”
“Now you’re here.”
Thankfully the darkness of the night hides your faces from each other. In the solitude it provides, you can feel warmth bubbling and spilling over your eyelids, leaving glossy trails down your cheeks that shimmer gold in the passing streetlights. When it was clear that Joe was done with you, you had decided to leave him and your affections towards him behind. Clearly a part of you never quite let go. That much is clear to you now, as tears escape you without your permission.
Still driving, Joe glances up at the rear-view mirror, catching your eye. Your teary eyes. You can hear the frown in his voice.
“(Y/N)?”
“You left me behind,” you whisper.
For a moment, more silence. Then, “I know. And you know what? It was the stupidest decision that I ever made.”
Yes, it was. For a while, having loved him, having trusted him, felt like the stupidest decision that you ever made. It seems so terribly silly and childish to be sitting behind the man you once loved wholeheartedly – the man who broke your heart – and to wish for nothing more than for the two of you to go back to the way that you once were.
Second times the charm? Or should you follow a policy of “fool me once”?
“I want to go home,” you say. “Can you take me home? Please?”
Joe nods. “Where to?”
You give him the name of the hotel that you’re staying in. The cab fills with the rhythmic click-click, click-click of the blinker as Joe changes lanes, easing the car onto the exit and then navigating onto the quickest route like a master. There are several times when you hear him draw a breath as if to speak, but he never says anything. You keep quiet, allowing him the silence to concentrate on his driving.
Say something! Part of your brain – or is it your heart? – demands. You never expected to see him again, and now the chance is here. The destination is fast approaching, and then what will you do? If only you don’t squander it, this could be your chance to say all the things that have plagued you for years.
The cab slows as Joe sidles up to the hotel. Warm light from the lobby spills out the door and into the back of the cab, beckoning you into its safety. However, something stronger in the front of the cab keeps you firmly in place.
“I can’t sleep alone. Not again.” The words tumble out of your mouth before you’ve even had the chance to register them in your mind.
For the first time since you got into the cab, Joe turns to face you so that you can look at each other head-on. He frowns.
You rush on. “Do you remember Austria? After we liberated that camp, I never thought that I would sleep again. I only got rest because you were willing to flaunt the fraternization policy to come hold me, keep me safe.”
“I remember.”
“I think about that, sometimes,” you admit. You probably shouldn’t have told him that, given him that power over you. But who doesn’t regret the things they say at 2 a.m.?
Joe pushes a sigh, long and hard, through his nose. “Fuck.” He adjusts his position so that he’s leaning further back into the cab, closer to you. Through the darkness, you can see the conflict so clearly on his face, with his wrinkled brow, his frown. It’s so familiar.
“I’m sorry,” Joe says. “I really . . . I was stupid. You deserved better than that. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I thought that I was sparing you.”
“From what?”
“All my pain. My anger.”
“You don’t think I have that, too?”
Joe blinks, like the thought hadn’t occurred to him. When your boyfriend should have been helping you through those things, you had to rely on your old friends from the company instead. You would have helped him through his struggle, if he had only let you.
Then again, Joe Liebgott always had trouble asking for and admitting when he needed help.
“Park the car, Joe,” you say. “No, not here. In one of the parking spots.”
“Why?” Joe asks, even though he’s already pulling into a parking spot – he gets it perfect on the first try, effortlessly.
“Because,” you say. “You’re done driving for the night. You’re coming up to my hotel room and we’re finally going to talk.”
Joe kills the engine, but he doesn’t move from his seat. For a moment he stares at you, like he isn’t sure if this is real, or if he should. He must make up his mind because he nods, gets out of the car, and comes around to open your door for you. In the old days, he would have smirked at you, given you some pick-up line to hear you laugh. Now, he watches you with reserve.
Maybe this is a mistake. But if either of you really feels that what happened was a mistake, then there’s the possibility that it can be fixed, even after all these years. Not in one night, but it will be a start. Tonight, you can do something for Joe that people so often forget that he needs – show him some understanding, some compassion. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll be able to reignite the light that once existed between you again.
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theweirdgoodbyes · 1 month
Text
“C’mon, lemme help you. You’re breakin’ my heart.”
It’s a Thursday night, the Eagles are playing against the Patriots, and Babe Heffron is one miserable son of a bitch. He had called Bill for an emergency meeting after a particularly gruesome day at work, which including him chasing a student eloping out of the building and down the streets of Philadelphia in 15 degree weather. Why administration hadn’t listened to him about needing locks on his doors, he’ll never understand. Babe ended the day freezing, frustrated, and with a pile of paperwork. He loved his job as a special education teacher, and loved making a difference in young lives. But days like today always brought him back to their familiar spot, The Currahee, much needed beer in hand. One beer had turned into two, and then three, and then Babe lamenting his lonely existence as a perpetually single gay man.
“Pussy hound Bill Guarnere wants to help me pick up a guy? Has hell frozen over?” Babe asks sarcastically, pressing two fingers to the pulse in his neck, “Am I dead?”
“Shaddup. Don’t act like the guys wouldn’t go crazy over me.”
Babe leans forward, reaching out to pat Bill’s arm, “Oh, baby, you drive me crazy alright.”
Babe would do anything for Bill Guarnere. When they were sixteen, and Babe finally understood why he didn’t look at girls the way other guys did, he was terrified to tell Bill that he was gay. Bill, all rough edges and macho energy, had been his best friend since the first day of kindergarten. “You tryna play?” Bill had barked at him the moment Babe stepped into the classroom, still clinging to his mother’s legs. From that moment on the two of them were inseparable. The idea of losing Bill was scarier than anything he could think of, and it took Babe months and several pep talks in the mirror to muster up the courage. So one fateful night, as they drank some stolen beers on Babe’s childhood trampoline, Babe just blurted it out.
“Bill, I like guys.”
Bill was silent for a moment, before tossing his beer over the netting and rolling on top of Babe to envelop him in a giant hug. Babe hugged him back and fought back tears against his shoulder, comforted by Bill’s gruff assurances that best friends forever meant forever. Ten years later, here they are, still thick as thieves, and Bill is adamant that all of Babe’s problems will be solved by getting laid.
“Alright, ‘nough of the funny business,” Bill puts his hands up, as serious as he could ever be. “You want my help or not? I’m tired of listenin’ to you piss and moan over what’s his face.”
“Henry,” Babe sighs, thinking of his ex boyfriend. They had only dated for the summer while Henry was doing an internship in the area. He had gone back to Buffalo in August, and Babe’s love life has been bleak since.
“Yeah, Fuckface McGee, him. You were too good for him, Babe, didn’t I always tell you that?” Bill raises a furry eyebrow, forgetting that according to him Babe was too good for every boyfriend he’s had. He had also taken up the obnoxious but well-meaning habit of running every guy Babe had ever spoken to through the database at the police station, with something as small as a speeding ticket enough to make him concerned. “How long have you known me?”
“Too damn long.”
“And have I ever steered you wrong?”
Before Babe can open his mouth, Bill points at him with a shake of his head, “Don’t answer that. Take a good look around this bar and take your pick. Daddy’s gonna help you.”
Babe looks around the bar. It’s a freezing night in January, so it’s only regulars like him and Bill who have no better place to be. He scans past familiar faces until he sees someone he doesn’t recognize.
“Him.”
Bill turns to look. This stranger is sitting at the bar, eyes laser-focused on the game playing above him. Babe can’t make out the color, but can feel the intensity in them from across the room. He’s got a short crop of black hair to match his furrowed brows, a bit of stubble, and lips that Babe is very interested in seeing up close.
“That guy? The little one with the face?”
“He’s not little.”
“You think he’s on your team?”
Babe keeps looking at this handsome stranger, taking more of him in. His gaydar has always been horrible, highlighted by the confident kiss he had once given his buddy Welsh only to gently be told that friends is all they would ever be. Babe runs on the assumption because it’s 2024, and the world is a much more accepting place than it was ten years ago, that trying to hit on a straight guy isn’t the worst thing that could happen. The stranger is still wearing his coat, despite the stuffy bar air, arms crossed and hands tucked under his armpits like he’s cold. He’s found a lonely corner of the bar, and the drink in front of him is empty. He’s got an air about him that’s says “leave me the fuck alone”, and Babe sees him shake his head when the bartender goes over. Maybe he’s getting ready to leave, he thinks. Babe starts to second guess himself, and begins looking around to see his other options. Handsome Stranger’s mysterious vibe is intriguing, but the possibility of rejection would put Babe in the ground after his rough day.
“I’m goin’ in,” Bill stands up before Babe can protest and struts over to the bar, misplaced confidence oozing out of him.
Babe can only watch in horror as Bill plops himself down next to Handsome Stranger, sticks out a meaty hand, and begins to jabber away. He decides that’s all he needs to see and sets his sight on the nearest TV just in time to watch the Eagles make a touchdown. At least it’s a good day for the Bird Gang.
A moment passes and Babe finds the courage to look back at the bar. He sees Bill stomping back over to him, face contorted in a scowl that Babe is all too familiar with. The conversation cannot have gone in his favor. The guy is definitely straight, potentially homophobic based on Bill’s visible anger.
“What did he say?” Babe dares to ask. He puts his glass to his lips, praying for a miracle.
“First of all, kid must be fuckin’ blind because he took one look at me and says ‘Absolutely not’.”
Babe chokes on his beer, sputtering foam all over the table. He pounds his chest with his fist, willing himself to breathe through his laughter. It’s not often that Bill faces rejection, and the obvious wound to his ego is something Babe will savor for years to come.
“So I says, ‘Listen, toots’-“
Babe’s laughter is cut short and he groans, because of course Bill would make an ass of himself, and by extension, Babe. “Bill, no, you did not call him ‘toots’-“
“I says, ‘first of all, you ain’t my type, with the lack of tits and that pissy pout-“
“BILL!”
“-and you ain’t for me, you’re for the poor fucker sittin’ over here’”, Bill plops back down in his chair, shaking his head. He finishes his beer and sighs, like the interaction has exhausted him, “And then I walked away before I punched him in the mouth.”
Babe just drops his head down on the table. This isn’t the first time Bill has been an absolute beast in public, and it certainly won’t be the last. Babe’s minuscule dream of a night not spent alone has been dashed.
“You need a muzzle,” he mumbles to the wood, “I’m gonna have to tie you to the pole outside. Put up a sign that says, ‘please don’t pet me, I bite’.”
“Don’t be a prick. Can’t say I didn’t tr-“
“Hey.”
Babe looks up and Jesus Christ, Handsome Stranger is standing right in front of him. Although the bar is quieter than usual, the man had appeared with such silence that Babe wonders if he appeared out of thin air. He can barely believe this is real, certain that the guy was either straight or so repulsed by Bill that all hope was lost.
“Hey,” he squeaks out. Oh, Christ. He clears his throat and repeats himself, “Hey.”
The guy stares at him with those dark eyebrows still furrowed, like he’s looking at something under a microscope. Suddenly self-conscious under his unrelenting gaze, Babe runs his hand over his forehead, trying to rub away any red mark that might be left from slamming his head down.
God, up close he really is hot. His eyes are somewhere between blue and grey, complimented by the blue scrubs he’s wearing under his coat. Babe feels his cheeks turning as red as his hair, but unable to look away from those unblinking eyes. Over the hum of distant conversations and game commentary, Babe wonders if Handsome Stranger can hear his heart thumping out of his chest.
“You his friend?” He sticks a thumb at Bill, who immediately straightens up.
“His best friend, actu-“
“Give me your phone.”
Babe could fall out of his chair. There’s no way.
“My what?”
“Your phone. It’s right there.” Handsome Stranger points to where it rests on the table next to Babe’s glass.
“Oh, yeah, sure, here.” Babe scrambles to grab his phone and unlock it, handing it over quicker than he would like to admit.
The stranger taps at it and then quickly types something in and hands it back to Babe. He looks to see his contacts open, with a new addition: Eugene Roe. He doesn’t recognize the area code, explaining why he’s never seen this Eugene before tonight.
“Cool beans,” is all Babe can think to say because holy shit, he did not expect Bill to actually pull through with this. When he looks up again, Eugene Roe is gone. He looks to the door just in time to see it swing shut, catching a quick glimpse of white sneakers walking away.
Bill gives him a shit eat grinning and grabs his shoulders to give him a rough shake.
“Cool beans? What are you, fuckin’ twelve?”
“I panicked,” Babe defends himself. He can’t help but smile and looks back at his phone. He wonders if it would make him seem desperate to text him right now. Yeah, it would, he decides, maybe he’ll wait an hour-
Bill cackles, a sound that shocks Babe back into reality. “Never say I never did nothin’ for you, even though that guy is already on thin fuckin’ ice with me. Now go buy me a beer. The king is thirsty.”
Babe happily obliges, making his way over to the bar in a half-daze. While the bartender pours Bill’s beer, Babe looks back over to where his handsome no-longer a stranger was sitting. Eugene Roe, he thinks, who are you?
(Now posted on my ao3 with some edits! https://archiveofourown.org/works/53977666#work_endnotes)
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