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#hell doesn't waste time
uncanny-tranny · 2 years
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Your life isn't a to-do list. You're allowed to exist, to take life as slow as you'd like. The dreams you have won't suddenly disappear. It's okay to stop and smell the roses, or to engage with "childish" things, or to recover, or do what you need to.
#positivity#encouraging words#life doesn't need to be a speedrun or a 100% run#sometimes it feels like i'm wasting my life but... who gets to tell me what is wasteful? i'm surviving out here and that's okay#and it's okay if you're also somebody who people think is 'wasting your life'#that's such a meaningless and frankly a very cruel thing to say to a person#because you'll see people call somebody's life wasteful because they're simply coping with disability/mental illness/grief/ect#it's a meaningless saying to tell somebody how YOU think they're wasting life. your life isn't a waste point-blank#we ought to be kinder to ourselves for choosing what we want/need out of our lives rather than placating to what is imposed on us...#...or the expectations we impose on ourselves#be kinder to yourself whenever you can. it's hard as hell but please choose kindness toward yourself#just something i thought about and felt like it was impirtant to me#i couldn't complete high school 'on time' because of covid and because i was in crisis. i felt so much shame about that. i felt stupid...#...i felt unworthy. but who decided that i am those things? the crisis i was in could have killed me. i couldn't deal with school then...#...it humbled me because i had to learn that i am not immune to needing to be kind to myself. i am human - i'm not a mindless drone...#...you aren't a mindless drone either. you are an individual. you deserve to feel safe. you deserve understanding and compassion...#...but not ONLY from others. you deserve it from yourself as well
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bonefall · 5 months
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Voted for Bumble bc of course but also if you think Alex would not pspsps Bumble you are wrong. If they could communicate they would go to therapy together /s
If then could communicate they would go to therapy together
/GEN
Kyle/Green Lantern resurrects her but then he becomes convinced that she's not the same person she was before the incident, OR SOMETHING SOMETHING Black Lanterns aren't ACTUALLY bad they're just misunderstood Grim Reaper types, in either case Alex ends up breaking it off with Kyle because they've become very different people.
And then Bumble's there
And then they go to therapy or Alex adopts Bumble, and then uhhh Bumble's like one of the superpets. Like Krypto the Superdog. Free premise go forth and play with it if ur a DC fan
#bone babble#Again I don't actually know a lot about the DC universe besides what my friend tells me#But also from reading into the Black Lanterns having them be evil sound like a WHOLE wasted opportunity#Lanterns are supposed to be emotions yeah? so why the hell are we downplaying the emotion of GRIEF?#There's a whole lot you could do with that actually. Death doesn't deserve to just be a villain of the week#And hell. You could explore some WILD emotions here about Alex becoming so much more than Kyle's tragedy#Can I still mourn you when you aren't dead?#What does it mean for me that the worst thing that ever happened to me has become an opportunity for her?#And... does this make me selfish for not being happy for her?#For not trying to understand the person she has become? for only thinking of how this impacts myself#RE: THIS IS NOT A DIG AT DC FANS#BUT I want to share that like... a reason I've kinda had a hard time getting into comics is because like... really interesting premises--#like that often get turned into Monster-of-the-Week struggles for the heroes to punch into submission#I've probably just seen really bad summaries or not found the editions that would appeal to me specifically#But it's kinda why the only DC hero I'm really interested in is Superman#Because a lot of his thing is that he's a good GUY#And that creates a lot of interesting moral questions#Like YES he's a good guy. YES he has no ulterior motive. But what if he DID?-- how can EVERYONE ELSE in the universe truly know that-#for sure?#And that's cool and I really like the snippets I've seen especially between him and batman#But anyway. so much fridging and misogyny in the world of comics has kinda turned me away from getting into it#because. VERY often. Misogyny can be... *tied* to a bit of a lack of imagination. Or empathy on behalf of a particular writer#RE: There is good stuff in DC PLEASE understand im not trying to be insulting
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crusaderce · 2 months
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I'm like also really mad that they legit killed Chess and Horn off screen, that is just so disrespectful to their characters. Everything in this chapter felt disrespectful to the Tiddy Squad.
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leqclerc · 10 months
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Deep down I would still really love seeing charles winning in ferrari instead of changing teams, but it doesn't feel like there's any hope honestly.
like, before was "next year is our year" but now even next year already seems doomed
https://twitter.com/FUnoAT/status/1667556319463702533?t=W3fsCNE2itVZqVKqw1AGbg&s=19
Oh no gang 🤐 I remember seeing a tweet or something saying June is likely going to be crunch time at Ferrari when it comes to preparation for 2024. I know Fred's been trying to poach staff where he can, especially engineers, and I know some of them have been released/are due to finish their gardening period soon, but there have also been setbacks, and ultimately I don't think he ended up getting the guys he was after, certainly not all of them. I'm really hoping next year's project is a step in the right direction, but there's no denying they're in a difficult place right now so it could really go either way. With how strong (and most importantly stable) Red Bull's situation looks, with Aston's facilities and upgrade packages, and with Mercedes seemingly starting to steer the ship in the right direction once again, Ferrari are definitely on the back foot.
Also, being in the middle of a little nostalgia fest right now and looking back at content from 2019, particularly the interviews and longer feature docus centered around Charles... a lot of the magic of the time stemmed from the fact that he was so young and on the rise. I mean, his second year in F1 overall and his debut season in Ferrari and he already showed so much promise and talent and determination. I think he was really this injection of new youthful energy into the team, into the Tifosi as a whole (even Seb called this "new beginning" with Charles joining the team one of the best moments of his Ferrari career, which is huge). Up to that point Ferrari had generally banked on established drivers, often champions. And here's a young hotshot who doesn't yet know the taste of winning and has this fervent desire to experience it in red. He had a clear goal in sight and he pursued it relentlessly, even if it meant getting caught up in questionable on-track situations. There was maybe a bit of naivety in that, but also a lot of boldness and tenacity that can only come from being young and wanting to prove yourself. Add to that a dash of his penchant for self-criticism, and you can totally see why the world was so swept up in the rookie Ferrari driver's story, why he became the main subject of character study fics at the time. It was fascinating. Like, sometimes, more than anything, I would just love to be able to go back and experience all of that again, just live in that brief moment in time when it really seemed like the only way is up and things can only get better.
But now we're halfway through 2023. 2019 was, somehow, unbelievably, already four years ago. And the story that was supposed to be filled with success and victories has been marred by misfortune and subpar machinery. Now he's no longer a 21-year old sensation winning in Monza, but just another title-less driver in their 20s trying to do the best with what they've got. His career has pretty much stalled and he's being increasingly criticized more than he's being praised (not that he escaped criticism in 2019-20, far from it, but there's a little bit of leniency to be found when someone's young and starting out, or when they can respond to this criticism with a win because the facilities are there). From being called the "Vettel Slayer" or whatever, to being ranked on par with or even below Carlos. What was once an engrossing clash of young generational talents (Silverstone 2019, anyone?) has become a completely unfair, skewed comparison that is ultimately used to portray Charles in a negative light. So the whole thing has lost its shine a bit, and what started out as a journey full of hope and potential is now increasingly turning into a drawn-out tragicomedy.
And obviously the disappointing, frustrating thing is that it's largely down to circumstance and whatever the hell is going on internally within that team that's preventing them from performing at their best. The stats are bleak, and it's so frustrating to know that the results table on Wikipedia or any other site aren't a genuine reflection of his talent and abilities, but they're ultimately what people remember and choose to base their perception of a driver on. Objectively he's still young and he can still go far, but equally, this sport can be ruthless and cruel and success is hard to reach if the stars don't align. Statistically speaking, he's got about ten years left in his career as a full-time driver, give or take. Fernando's more of an exception than the rule, and there's even less Lewises out there (having his most successful run in his 30s, so in the back half of his career.) Then again, even if the Mercedes stint had completely not worked out for him, he still wouldn't be going home empty-handed, because he was already crowned champion once before he joined. I think that frees you up, mentally and otherwise, to focus on other pursuits. Crossing that threshold and getting your first championship is always the hardest step. The thought of Charles never finding out what that feels like and being left to wonder what could have been is really hard to take. :/
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meowmeowmessi · 10 months
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messistas can try to give this a positive spin as much as they want but this is the fumble of the century the kind of disastrous decision making skills at club level that i was talking abt there's no coming back from this
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daz4i · 7 months
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i know aging isn't the end of the world and 24 isn't that old and life isn't a race etc etc etc. however,
#i think a big reason i feel so bad abt being this age is ppl told me this is when things start to get better#and i still feel the same way i did as a teenager so. well. is it really 😐#(being on t probably isn't helping but it's been over 3 years already so... not an excuse i think)#but I'm also physically aging like the reason i barely upload selfies anymore is i see myself getting uglier every day#despite fighting for my life to at least take care of my face and hair...... can't fight the passage of time 😔#+ ofc. my (younger) friends being way more sorted out than i am on every level#again ik life isn't a race but. it can't help but hurt to know I'm still behind literally everyone i know#and my excuses for that aren't even good. bc other disabled ppl my age are also more sorted out than i am#other depressed ppl other borderlines other autistics etc etc. hell these are also my irl friends 😭#and it's dumb. bc feeling like i wasted my life isn't really pushing me to change that now. just makes me want to die even more#(bc i mean what's the point. i will never catch up. I'm still at the starting line AND i move so slow it doesn't even count)#(i don't have a single milestone ppl my age have not even finishing high school which is like. the bare minimum)#(and it sucks bc i also know i have potential i KNOW i can do shit in theory i know I'm smart and got skills. but i can't put it to use)#(and now this is turning into less of a thing abt age and just generally me talking abt how i wasted the last 24 years)#this was more of a stressed rant abt how I'm turning ugly and feeling super old but well. it all boils down to self loathing at the end 👍#vent#negative //#ask to tag#sorry for being so depressing all day oof ik i already said it before but it's been a rough couple of months#(nothing happened my brain just needs to get flushed down the toilet ^_^)#edit: i think. part of my panic about aging. is bc as a kid i was used to being the youngest everywhere#i was the youngest in my class bc i started school a year early. i was the youngest in acting school bc they don't normally accept teenagers#and in addition to that as an adult but before starting t i was always told that i LOOK young too#but now ik i look like I'm in my 20s. and it's killing me that i aged this much in so little#i wonder if shaving my beard will help but i don't wanna get misgendered 😐😐😐 and rn it's the only thing guarding me from that
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solradguy · 1 year
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The weather needs to stop being cold and cloudy and stupid and miserable so my brain gets back out of fart stink hibernation seasonal affective disorder bastard mode. I gotta draw Sol Badguy but my motivation is directly tied to how much the sun's been out like I'm some kinda sunflower solar panel
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helladventurers · 9 months
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(long negative rant, be aware)
I think i'm starting to pinpoint one of the biggest reasons I can't really connect with the plot of botw and totk anymore 😫 and it's because I'm really tired of the "peaceful world whose entire source of conflict can all be pinned into a single, cartooningly evil individual/organization" trope
I'm rewatching some fire emblem playthroughs, another series who relies on that plot narrative too much, and it's exhausting to me 🫠 I thought that totk was a step down from botw plot wise, but it's really Nintendo's incapability and refusal to evolve and to make stories more complex than bog standard "evil always falls and light destroys darkness" kinda stories
#having watched a playthrough of revelations was eye opening lol#because that's an entire game/route who undoes all depth the story might have had just to introduce a big bad it can pins the blame upon#and that was the first moment i went 'ah this is a pet peeve of mine isn't it'#and like#fuck i don't care if you keep doing this to series like pokemon or mario#but you can't make a story on the scale of stuff like fire emblem or zelda where that's all it boils down to and expect me to stay invested#it doesn't help that them wanting to simplify everything also killed paper mario#which was one of my favorite series of all times#but at this point I can't even say it anymore because the amount of games i hate of the series outweight the amount of ones i love#and i that combined with everything nintendo has been doing#i'm just kinda done with them and their games#and hell i quoted pokemon a few tags ago but sumo and black & white had great stories#and again in sumo's case they just undid all the depth the story had in a later game#and they don't even pretend pokemon now is anything but a money printing machine for them#...also i fully realize that this might attract negativity considering i'm naming several series with giant rabbid fandoms#and if you're one of the people who might be angered at this#just don't waste your time and do something better than engaging with this post#bothering to engage with this post in a rude way will earn you nothing but a block#also i'm not saying fates had much depth to begin with just that they went and destroyed whatever depth there might've been there
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fadewalking · 10 months
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okay ya'll exposed me, the rumors are true-
I do not appreciate a side scroller game.
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bunn-iiii · 9 months
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i kinda don't want to go back to camp but some of my stuff is still there
#so basically i have to go home every weekend (go home Friday after lunch go back sunday after lunch)#which means i have to go back tomorrow#and all i want to do is talk to the silly people on my phone and not be extremely misgendered and unable to correct people#cause telling campers my pronouns isn't camp appropriate.#sometimes this camp makes me want to die a little#but i already paid for the three weeks and i don't want to just waste that money#and i have some fun#but it kinda sucks to be there without my phone and it's hot out and i get misgendered and asked why i have a cane and told to get over my#meltdowns by another C.I.T amd there's never ang silemce except when I'm sleeping and the food isn't great and my schedule has to completely#change for it and i have to go to bed early and i have to stand the sun to lead songs and I'm almost always moving or standing and everyone#is loud all the time and singing during meal times is hell cause the lodge echoes so it's just really loud and i cried 4 times last week and#had about 2-3 meltdowns in five days#and I'm exhausted from it and i can't do what i used to love doing at that camp because it causes me so much pain#and no other person at the camp has mobility issues besides the 70 uear old CIT director that very obviously doesn't fully believe i need my#cane or to sit down frequently or take breaks#so yeah I'm a bit overwhelmed#not to mention i don't even know if i want to be a counselor at that camp anymore because of the whole pronouns thing#the media director said i might be able to join the media team they want to put together#and i really love this camp cause I've been going to it for so fuckin long and I've wanted to be a counselor here since my first week as a#camper#but it's all a lot#and i don't know if i should take a stand and be like “nope I'm not gonna let you treat me like this you just lost a future employee” or#just suck it up?#i hate breaking promises i made to myself in the past#and i told myself i was gonna be a counselor here no matter what#but i just dont know if i can take all that bs all summer every summer#ugh#tw vent
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holytrickster · 9 months
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idk i think it's so funny I went down a survival horror game rabbit hole when a) I'm too freaking anxious for horror games I will make myself cry, b) it was all PS2 stuff which is extra funny bc I've never even played on someone else's playstation let alone had one, i was always a wii kid lol. but now my brain is like ah yes. time to consume everything I can about games I can't even play and that are stupid expensive/hard to get now
#also i love that people draw jennifer from rule of rose and fiona from haunting ground together#they're just two girls with their dogs and in horrible situations and you know im glad they get to have dogs#any game where i get to have a pet is alright by me even if shit is otherwise majorly fucked#anyway. i do need to play pathologic. it's funny bc in theory it is really the kind of thing I'd like bc there's so much stuff to uncover#plus i think classic HD (which is the version i have) fixes the bad translation so it's not even like it's too hard to understand#at least only hard to understand in the intended pathologic-y way anyway#and i really really like the soundtrack#and everything I've watched and read about it is sick as hell (no pun intended) so i think the thing making me unable to get into it is the#actual experience of playing it. like it's funny how much of an asshole dankovsky is but that doesn't mean I *want* to play as an asshole#its funny the only time i really like playing that way is in skyrim bc im just. greenish elf that picks everyone's locks bc it was the first#thing i figured out and characters will just ???? let me fucking do it??? (i say having gotten arrested in whiterun like immediately)#i guess because I'm not invested in any of the characters yet because i havent had time to sit down and really play it#i guess that'd kind of be the way i play in lotro but that's more just me not interacting with other players#fun fact i think i still have one of the earliest fellowship quests sitting unfinished bc i can never form groups to finish them#i don't think I'll even ever get good at lotro though honestly#more just knowing what buttons to spam#idk i played hunter FOREVER but minstrel is really really growing on me#even though some of the skills are kinda wasted since i only ever play alone#anyway what was i talking about
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watchmakermori · 11 months
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the table scene in attack on titan season 4 hits just as hard the second time. even though eren has already gone so far off into the deep end by that point, that’s still the moment where you’re like ‘WOW i really hate this motherfucker’
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ctorres74 · 1 year
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God that guy is so sweet. How did you manage to get him to stick around again
Mewww?
...Mrrrp...
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arsonist-chicken · 2 years
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ahjahjah today in class, we had some discussions about how to translate some dessert names and which German or Austrian names to pick, and I had to hold back so much to not start a whole class debate about various food names
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Maybe I just miss havin someone else to blame
#i feel so fucking useless. worthless. i had ONE job n instead i fucked it up n crossed that one line i can't uncross#he'll never forgive me n it's all my own damn fault#don't know how to cope with how there's no way back now. he doesn't even want me anymore he just wants to hurt me#n i kinda wanna let him cause it's all i was ever any good for anyway#just. lie back n let him take it all out on me. as if he ever made it that easy#god what the hell is wrong with me this is fucking pathetic#he was the only one that could make my head quiet the only one i could always go back to. even if he made me regret it every time#i don't know how to change any of this. it can't always be like this can it? somethin's gotta change at some point right?#i need to stop gettin so fucking wasted i make a fool outta myself but. i only feel even sorta okay if i'm drunk#what the fuck am i supposed to do?#i just wanna go home. i thought things would get better now that i'm technically free of him but. i still feel the same. or worse#at least i could keep myself numb most of the time. n i had cherri n nuggs. everyone feels so fucking far away here#n it's probably me not them but. idk how to change anythin. everythin's just wrong.#everythin's always wrong#i'm so fucking tired n sleep doesn't change a fucking thing#i guess maybe val was right. there's nothin out here for someone like me. what he gave me was the best i could get n i shoulda just m#*appreciated it instead of always complaining#idk how long i can keep myself from goin back to him. just to see if he can still make it all go away. even if i'll probably regret it.#fucking hell how long can i keep this up?? i can't start drinkin more i can't damage this body like that for the others#but i'm startin to run really low on options#spdrvent
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stardustedknuckles · 1 year
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You know, all of this eye strain and tension headache and migraine stuff ramped up when I finally ran out of my old regular contacts and started using the toric lens my eye doctor prescribed for my left eye. I have my glasses on today because it was getting so bad and my left eye is extremely annoyed with me. I keep feeling like it's refusing to focus until I manually "find" the muscle and force it to. I told her I didn't want astigmatism correction because I have the lowest possible astigmatism you can have and I have never had it compensated for. I didn't think anything of the toric lenses because it was six months before I ran out of regulars (don't ask how long I wear them for all of our sakes, it's way too long because they're fucking expensive) but damn if all this headache and light sensitivity shit didn't start after I gave in and wore the damn toric on my left eye.
And if that's the case it means my glasses are also pretty much non-viable long term because again, she put the astigmatism correction in the left eye and it kind of hurts. The whole point of the glasses was to have a place to relax my eyes away from the contacts, but I haven't yet managed to wear them longer than three days. I just get to feeling lightheaded and strange. I'd go without either but I literally cannot see, so.
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