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#helped ground the compassion - or like helped me remember that
proxycrit · 2 months
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Part 1 / Part 2
Emmet remembers when he and Ingo first brought Elesa to explore Celestial Tower, back when they were fourteen and thought they were immortal.
“Allegedly, the bell chime will bring ghosts home”, ingo had told emmet with the pompous knowing energy of a child who read way too much brochures. “It’s culturally significant! We must ring it.”
“Hmmm,” emmet had responded suspiciously. “Brother. The bell is at the top of the tower.” The implication stands: Ingo, there are thirty flights of stairs between here and the top, and no elevator to speak of.
Don’t be a coward, Litwick had told Emmet with the blaise tone of somebody who’s going to be piggy backing off of somebody else. Go ring the bell. Tynamo, sensing a litten fight, floated towards a loitering blitzle.
Ingo turns his lilipup eyes on Elesa, who’s squinting at the carved stone faces of the front door.
“Elesa? What do you think?”
Elesa thinks. She shrugs. “We already made our way here,” she said in accented galarian. “Might as well make it the rest of the way. Ganbatte!”
Emmet sighs. “This is a mistake,” he tells the two in exhaustive patience, but lets himself be dragged into the building.
Last time the twins were here, Ingo caught litwick— but not before she managed to nab a good chunk of Emmet’s soul. It’s not terrible; he felt fatigued for a week and bounced back pretty quickly, but it was the principle of the whole situation— celestial tower’s a pain in the ass and Emmet will stand by that until the day he dies.
Like right now.
The map isn’t working. Emmet checked it once. He’s checked it twice. He’s taken out his pen and written on it, which he would usually never do but desperate times call for desperate measures. The compass he brought spins useless circles. It’s like chargestone cave up here, but worse because instead if electric pokemon it’s all ghosts.
“We’re lost, yyup yup!” He announced to the crew. “I vote we eat Ingo first.”
“I love you too,” Ingo told Emmet placidly. “But we all know between the two of us, you’re the tastier one.” Litwick gives Emmet a thumbs up. Emmet gasps in mock affront.
“Elesa, help!”
Elesa gives the two of them a wary look. It took two floors for her to realize this is not just a weird temple with strange rocks, but a full out graveyard. She’s not very happy about that development.
“Don’t drag me into this,” she tells them. “Teme wa urusaii.”
“I will take that as a compliment,” Ingo reports back.
Emmet, who’s cheerfully struggles with Galarian on a good day, simply gives her a thumbs up.
The three painstakingly crawl their way up. And up. If all else fails, Emmet told himself, at least they can orient themselves towards high ground.
“We’re like pidoves,” Ingo gasps. He has fallen behind them on the stairs, with Emmet taking the lead through sheer spite despite his legs going numb on floor twenty two. “We, hah, we are attracted by the magnet of the bell, like, like probopass-“
“I am emmet! You are not making, sense!” Emmet called back. Elesa, who’s stuck between them and looking two steps from perpetual collapse, giggles.
“No, no hear me out, Ingo wheezes. “What if the bell’s a magnetic pole? And that’s why your compass doesn’t wo, woo, hahh, work.”
Emmet stops to rest, just because Ingo is using precious breathing air to infodump. Elesa gratefully slumps against the railing. Tynamo and litwick, lazy in their still small size, have settled on a weary blitzle and look very smug doing so. (Emmet is not jealous, he tells himself. Emmet is also lying.)
“The bell’s important,” Ingo had repeated.
“Okay,” Elesa responds. “If it’s important to you, then it’s important to us.”
And Emmet finds that he agrees with Elesa. Partially because they crawled up twenty fucking three flights of stairs, but also because Ingo thinks this is important, so it is.
And here’s the thing—
— emmet doesn’t remember much after that.
The rest of that trip was a blur of exhausted groaning and burning legs, and by the time the trio managed to breach floor thirty, people’s brains have all but dribbled out their ears. Emmet remembers being disgustingly sweaty. He remembers blitzle almost tripping to death and litwick’s swearing. He remembers tynamo sticking to his neck like a damp towel. He remembers Ingo’s excited sneasel smile, and the way the sunset bounced off of Elesa’s hair.
He remembers the brassy ring of the Celestial bell. It sounded like victory.
But it was Elesa’s cackle turned scream as Ingo swiped cold hands down her neck that sounded like home.
—-
So when the conductor at thirty one, lost and disoriented in the Impossible Place, heard the sound of a familiar bell, ringing over and over and over-
-the sound of laughter-
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-EMMET! Elesa cried-
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-like a homing pidove, the conductor, thinks nonsensically as something in him perks up.
(Emmet had always liked winning, more than anything else, and the sound of victory calls him home.)
Elesa catches lightning in a bottle. Elesa, arms outstretched, finds purchase in her brother, and does not let go.
Emmet is so, so cold, Elesa thinks as the wind steals air from her lungs. (That’s okay. She’s already breathless from a terrible business called hope.)
Emmet stares back. His hands flap against Elesa’s jacket. Elesa desperately drinks in his wan face and too wide eyes and his frost bitten lips. In a tiny, meek voice, almost lost to the wind, he asks:
“Are you real?”
Elesa lets out an ugly sob. Her tears whip away in the wind as they fall. Emmet’s frightened countenance turns immediately to alarm. His shaky grasp becomes a solid grip as they spin through the air, cushioned by chandelure’s psychic.
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“I think so??” Elesa warbles. She sees Emmet’s eyes dart to her mouth. He’s reading mirroring her, she realizes with giddy delight— it’s such an Emmet thing to do, to read lips, and-
“I am Emmet,” Emmet breathes. His eyes have started to water. “Yyou are Elesa- Oh dragons, Elesa!?“
Elesa reaches. Hesitates.
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Emmet grabs elesa by the lapels and crushes her tight against him. Elesa holds on, and the grief and relief in her accumulates into a wet sopping mess. She’s ruining his jacket, she mourns, but its okay because he’s dripping all over hers.
She can’t hear what he’s saying into her shoulder, can’t read what he says, but everything’s okay because every part of her is chiming
You came back
You’re here
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I’m not alone anymore.
Around them, the air distorts as Chandelure’s psychic wavers, flutters, and solidifies. Gravity reverses its call as they settle gently on the ground, dust billowing in all directions.
The ghost pokemon drops next to them, shaking so hard the musical clang of glass makes Elesa flinch.
You fucks, Chandelure gasps. DON’T GO LEAPING OFF BUILDINGS, I AM NOT YOUR EMERGENCY PARACHUTE.
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“I’m sorry,” Elesa gasps, still giddy from the adrenaline.
AND YOU! Chandelure howls, whirling on Emmet, who’s still staring at the ghost with huge eyes. He’s gripping on to solid ground with the energy of a man who realized he could have been a splat on the ground.
YOU LEFT!
Emmet winces.
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You- You left us, you left me-
Ah, ah no, Elesa thinks as golden globules of light shed from Chandelure. This is what a ghost looks like crying.
Emmet holds out his arms. Chandelure drifts into his embrace, and shakes, and shakes, and shakes.
You left me, the ghost pokemon whispers. How dare you. How could you.
“I didn’t mean to,” Emmet whispers. “I’m sorry.”
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Stop doing this to me, Chandelure demands. Golden brine joins human tears, like drops of sun trapped in wet glass. Stop going where I can not follow.
And Emmet holds his tongue, because he knows he can not promise staying. Not while Ingo and Eelektross are still in Hisui.
(In the back of Emmet’s hurt and shattered mind is a spark. Synapses connect. The cold breach of the Distortion does nothing to drown out the sudden flare of hope in Emmet’s chest, so great he can not breathe, so strong he can not feel, because there’s a path. A difficult, painful path through the Space that Can Not Be, but a path all the same.)
“Elesa, Chandelure-“ Emmet’s voice breaks. He wants to tell them about Eelektross. He wants to tell them about the terrible past that is Hisui. He wants to explain how the last five months were filled with horror and wonder and fear and hope.
Hope, he thinks. So he says this:
“I know how to get Ingo home.”
NOTES:
AAAAAND THAT’S ALL FOR THIS DRABBLE. ITS OUT NOW. I CAN FINALLY GO BACK TO POSTING HAPPY SHENANIGANS! (Now you know the shape of their story.)
Thanks for reading this monster of a post!
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Synastry Notes - part 1
Neptune square Sun can make it difficult for the Neptune person to see the Sun person clearly. The Sun person can feel like they're not being seen for who they really are, and the Neptune person may feel confused by the Sun and project traits onto them. This aspect can be especially frustrating for the Sun person if they have harsh Neptune aspects in their natal chart, or prominent 12H placements (especially Sun in the 12H). People with these placements tend to struggle with their sense of self and can often feel invisible, and this synastry aspect can really amplify those feelings, making the Sun person feel more hidden and misunderstood than they already do. On a more positive note, Neptune aspects in synastry (even the harsh ones) can encourage forgiveness, compassion, and selflessness, especially coming from the Neptune person. Neptune can be very tolerant and accepting of the planet person, finding it easy to always assume the best of them. However, the harsh aspects often bring this forgiving quality to a bit of an extreme, with Neptune being unable to see any faults in the other person at all, so just be mindful of that.
Pluto-Mercury aspects can allow for some really deep and meaningful conversations between two people. Pluto is investigative, they want truth, rawness, depth. They can be extremely interested in the Mercury person's mind, wanting to draw out Mercury's completely honest, unfiltered thoughts and opinions. Pluto isn't satisfied with surface level conversation here, and can become quite frustrated if Mercury doesn't feel like sharing all of their deepest, darkest secrets, or if Pluto feels like they're being too 'filtered'. This is mainly an issue with the harsh aspects, with the Mercury person finding Pluto too probing, while the softer aspects tend to indicate that the Mercury person enjoys the intensity that Pluto brings to communication, and is quite willing to dive into deep conversation with them. Pluto can bring a newfound depth to Mercury's thinking, which Mercury is intrigued by. Pluto has the potential to completely transform the way that Mercury thinks about things and conceives of the world around them.
Chiron trine Venus can be so so sweet, the Venus person's love and affection has a healing effect on Chiron, soothing them of any pain and helplessness they may feel. Chiron might feel slightly reliant on Venus's care, and Venus may be their go-to person when they're out of sorts and in need of comfort. There's potential for a lot of unconditional love and compassion with this aspect.
I feel like 6H synastry doesn't always get the attention it deserves. I personally love it for any kind of relationship and find that with the right people it can be very tender and full of care. Similar to 12H synastry, there can be a self-sacrificing quality to the 6H. Except when it comes to 12H synastry this tends to be more of a 'spiritual' self-sacrifice, and usually feels more hidden, while the 6H speaks to self-sacrifice in a much more literal and grounded way. For example, canceling plans to take care of someone while they're sick, dropping everything to help out a friend in need, etc. Just really taking the time and effort to do something important for another person. Selfless care. 6H synastry always reminds me of this excerpt, "Pylades: I'll take care of you. Orestes: It's rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it's you."
Mars in the 7H synastry can make the Mars person want to rush into a relationship with the house person. Whichever house your Mars is placed in another person's chart can be where you sort of get tunnel vision and are very determined to get what you want; it's what you feel driven towards. And Mars is a bit of a selfish planet, it wants what it wants and it doesn't necessarily always remember to stop and consider the feelings of others. So with Mars in another person's 7H, the Mars person may be a bit pushy with the house person, struggling to understand the point of waiting to establish a relationship when they're ready to jump right in! Mars isn't the best planet to have in someone's 7H when it comes to approaching a relationship with slowness and maturity, that's more Saturn's domain. And if Saturn is a wise, slow-to-act old man, then Mars is kind of like a rowdy, over-eager child who doesn't quite get why they have to wait until after dinner to eat their dessert. The Mars person likely isn't interested in approaching the relationship gradually or with much caution, they just want to hurry up and make it official. Which can be a good or bad thing depending on who you ask.
The attraction that Mars-Venus aspects bring about tends to be quite palpable. As planets, Mars and Venus are polar opposites; with Mars ruling Aries and Scorpio, and Venus ruling Libra and Taurus, so these two can have very complimentary energies. I've found that being the Venus person can make you feel very giddy around Mars, even if that doesn't match your usual personality or demeanor. And being the Mars person can make you feel more passionate and assertive than you normally might. If you're the Mars person, you may feel very driven to attain the Venus person's love and affection. And if you're the Venus person, you're likely to be receptive to the Mars person's energy, finding them very attractive. With the harsh aspects, the Mars person can come off a little too strong and aggressive to Venus, which, in some cases, the Venus person might actually like and find intriguing.
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unbidden-yidden · 5 months
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I have gotten so many messages from folks who see what's happening to Jews right now, how literally any statement from us that isn't straight up "death to Israel!" "tear it down!" "river to the sea!" etc. - no matter how tempered in other ways or critical of the Israeli government it is - anything even mildly supportive of the terrorism victims/their families in their grief and/or Israelis deserving to live is getting dog piled to an absurd degree. And yes, that primarily targets Jews (because we're the ones primarily speaking on it) but it definitely is also hitting anyone not Jewish who says this as well. Immediately, overnight, the left has made any position that respects everyone's human rights and allows Jews room to grieve our murdered and missing family and friends without telling us they deserved to die in terrible ways completely radioactive. Like literally even the most milquetoaste statement attracts numerous hysterical commentators. And because it's so toxic, people are afraid to speak up.
And I've now heard from a lot of gentiles that they had no idea how deep the rot of leftist antisemitism went, how they've been seeing this unfold with horror, and are afraid to speak up.
Here's what I'll say: those messages give me a lot of strength, because they help me remember that I'm not insane, that this is horrendous, and we are seeing in real time exactly who would have helped the Gestapo find us if they were sufficiently convinced that this is "decolonization." That yes, the backlash really *is* that bad. I hear that affirmation and I appreciate it, and I understand your fear, because it was mine too. I myself strongly considered at the beginning not saying anything about this until I could do so without being harassed. (I decided against that because I am physically incapable of shutting up when it pertains to my people, but I understand the sentiment.)
Here's the thing: this is never going to end - those people who take seriously the question "are Jews people?" are going to be the vocal minority unless and until we all speak out. Jews are 2% of the US population and 0.2% of the world's population - there are literally more self-identified Nazis in America than there are Jews. I would honestly be surprised if there weren't more horseshoe theory leftists in the world than Jews also.
That being the case, we really do need our allies to speak up with us. I think if we all spoke up at once, it might be enough to break the silence-taken-as-agreement and shame everyone but the avowed antisemites (rather than the thoughtless and opportunistic ones) back into keeping their antisemitism under wraps. Which does have the effect of bringing the mob under control. Jews have faced a ton of mob violence in the form of pogroms throughout our history and backlash to Jewish victimhood. (Tl;dr - "How dare you make me consider how I might have benefited from or been complicit in hurting Jews? This is actually the fault of the Jews." is a disturbingly common thought process.) (You may also be wondering what I mean by "opportunistic;" I can explain in another post if people are interested.)
I know it's scary. I am well aware that you might lose friends from this. I personally decided that if those "friends" valued Jewish lives so little, they were never my friends to begin with, but it's different for non-Jews. They may genuinely be your friends. I'm not demanding you do this for me or my community, but I am asking you to consider what your line is for your friends. And if you are able to talk to them, to ask them what makes this group different from all other groups in terms of deserving compassion and human rights, it may just help us to quiet the mob.
And, if nothing else, just privately reminding those of us who are speaking about it that we are grounded in reality and compassion helps combat the mass gaslighting going on.
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clockwayswrites · 6 months
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A Broken Sort of Normal, Part 16
WC: 756 , Masterpost CW: We loop to the start and that entails The attacks start in northern Africa. It jumps from Algeria to Egypt, across the sea to Saudi Arabia to Turkey and into Europe. By the time it hits Metropolis, resources are already stretched thin. Danny is calling in every contact, every possible help, while he follows the worst of it himself, constantly organizing the next area of triage.
As he’s attempting to wrap the tourniquet around Barry’s leg, blood slicked hands failing him, it hits Danny like one of Superman’s punches.
They are going to lose.
Barry reaches out and grips a weak hand around Danny’s wrist. “Kid?”
It’s still a stupid nickname, but through all these years Barry still used it. Through the years of dinners and disasters and Danny being welcomed into Barry’s family at Wally’s side.
And now all these wonderful, heroic, brave people that Danny had come to be friends with are going to die. The monologue happening in the middle of the street made that much clear. No hero would be spared; any chance of a future uprising would be snuffed out this very day.
Because they are going to lose.
Danny smiles softly at Barry and pries his hand away.
“Kid, whatever you’re thinking—” Barry could have no idea what Danny is thinking. No one can.
No one can, because no one knows what Danny can do.
He leaves his bag by Barry. Most of the supplies have been used up, but maybe there is still something in it that will help people.
He just wants to help people.
The monologue cuts off as Danny approaches, feet sliding on the loose concrete around the edge of the crater that the imposing figure stands in. He manages not to fall, though, and strides past Superman with his head held high. He will not cower in front of death. He faced death once before and even though this time means becoming nothing, he will not cower as he faces it again.
He has to look up to meet the being’s eyes. There’s only cruelty there. The mouth twists in a cold smirk. “Has it come to this? That they send their healer to face me?”
“No.” Danny could hear Barry shouting his name. “They didn’t send me, I came by myself.”
The laugh raises the hair on the back of Danny’s neck, but he doesn't move away.
“Pathetic! You presume yourself to be the last line of defense? You, a mere medic? You are no hero and yet you dare to stand before me? Do you not think that I could break you with a single fist?”
Danny smiles softly, and raises his hand. The man doesn’t even move, so utterly sure that Danny poses him no threat. Danny rests his hand on the man’s chest. He has to reach up to do so.
The smirk turns into a sneer. “Or do you intend to appeal to some ideal of compassion? To try and change my heart? To ask me to spare your heroes?”
Superman is screaming at him now as he struggles to stand. Danny hears him fall again.
He doesn’t take his eyes off the man who would try to rule them all with nothing but death in his wake.
“No,” Danny says, tilting his head just slightly. His eyes scan over the hardened face again. “No, I don’t think I can do that. You’ve made a mockery of death for so long that your heart is hardened. It’s a good thing I don’t need it soft.”
Intangibility is as comfortingly familiar as it is horrifying to feel again. Danny shudders as it washes over him. His hand sinks, sickeningly, through armor and skin and bone to wrap around that hardened, beating heart.
It thuds once in his grip.
Danny yanks his hand back.
Danny pulls that heart from its chest.
The man gasps— the sound a pale imitation of a breath— and then he falls.
Like he was nothing.
Less than nothing.
A man that will only be remembered with hatred.
The massive heart slips from Danny’s limp fingers. It hits the ground with a wet squelch.
Danny wavers, eyes turning up to the sky where hundreds of clones are falling like horrifying intimidations of shooting stars. A soft smile spreads over his face.
He had done it.
Will people remember him?
It isn’t why he did it.
He just wants to help people.
Wanted to.
Was someone calling his name?
There had only been one chance. It was all he needed.
They would be safe now.
Everyone would be safe.
Humanity, Barry, Iris, the Titans…
Wally…
“Danny!”
---
AN: And here we are, back in present tense (thank you @mokulule for correcting all my slips back to past tense my migrained brain didn't catch.
I would say Danny used his one moment well, wouldn't you?
But this isn't quite the end. Now that we're back in the present... I think it's about time we saw somethings from Wally's POV, don't you?
I no longer tag, you can subscribe to the masterpost instead!
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thepaperpanda · 1 year
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Under His Watchful Eye || Douma x fem!reader
Summary: you are found injured by worshippers of Douma after being attacked by a wild animal in the mountains. You're taken to his temple where you're cared for and nursed back to health under the watchful eye of his. As time passes, Douma becomes attached to you, but when you disobey his order one day, he becomes angry and decides to punish you accordingly 
Warnings: smut with plot 🔞 & the reader asking far too many questions in the end 😀
Word count: 7792
Authors: Cass & Rouge
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As you hiked through the mountain trails, the fresh air and beautiful scenery made you feel invigorated. However, that feeling quickly vanished when a wild animal attacked you out of nowhere. You tried to defend yourself, but the creature was too strong and vicious, leaving you badly injured and alone. You were almost certain you would die.
Just when you thought you couldn't go any further after attempting to getting back home, a group of strange individuals appeared before you. They were dressed in long, flowing robes and had a serene look on their faces.
You felt weak in your knees and fell down to the frozen ground, shaking uncontrollably all over your exhausted body.
"Are you okay?" A female voice asked.
You tried to speak, but your throat was dry. You managed to nod, and they helped you to your feet. You leaned on one of them as they guided you into an unknown direction. "You must come with us," one of them said softly, taking your arm. 
"Poor thing, look at all those wounds," the other person added within sad tone.
You were too weak to resist as they led you deeper into the forest, eventually arriving at a small sanctuary.
As you walked, you couldn't help but notice the strange symbols painted on the rocks and trees around you. The people were quiet, and you could only hear the sound of the wind and the snow under their feet.
The last thing you remembered was the warmness of the interiors surrounding you. Then you lost your consciousness.
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Douma was pleasantly surprised today by something he did not expect. A very attractive female human was brought into his shrine, which he would even call a miracle; he wouldn't have to take any efforts to find someone new for his pleasures. He had to keep the girl there.
"Don't look at me like that. You should know what I expect. Take care of this poor thing. Treat her wounds, give her a bath, and dress her. Let her rest," he instructed.
He smiled at two of his dear followers, who were not really sure what to do with the newcomer. He was growing curious about how the girl really looked without all the blood and dirt on her. Sadly, he would have to wait to satisfy his curiosity.
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As time passed, you found yourself gradually regaining your strength. Though you still spent most of your days sleeping, you were surprised to find that a group of women were taking excellent care of you.
One day, as you slowly opened your eyes, you noticed a woman sitting beside you. "Oh, you're awake!" She exclaimed with a smile.
You rubbed your eyes and sat up a little, taking in your surroundings. The room was cozy and filled with dim light of candles. "Where am I?"
"You're in our sanctuary, in our lord's place," the woman replied. "My name is Aka, and I'm one of those who found you in the woods. You were very ill and injured, and we've been taking care of you for the past few weeks."
You felt a wave of gratitude wash over you, as well as shock when you realized how much time had passed. "You said weeks?" You inquired, your voice barely above a whisper. "Oh, my.... Thank you for everything."
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As the days passed, you continued to regain your strength. You were amazed at the kindness and compassion of these strangers who had taken you in and nursed you back to health. And as you looked around at the warm and welcoming home they had created, you knew that you were in good hands. At least that was the impression you'd received.
Meantime, Douma made sure to take care of you by sending someone to fetch something nice for you, and finally, he had a chance to see you in your full glory - free of any life-threatening illness, clean, and dressed in fine clothes. 
He personally couldn't wait to meet you and learn who you were. There were so many things he could do with and to you! It made him so excited that a shiver ran down his spine.
As Douma walked into the room that served you as your chamber, he hummed melodically, "My, my, my! Why did no one tell me that you are awake? I would have come sooner to see you." 
However, he stopped when he saw your surprised expression and turned to face the other woman standing near the door, "Oh, Aka, my dear. Haven't you told her everything yet?"
Aka, one of your trusted followers, approached the tall man with a heavy heart. She informed him that she had not been able to tell you everything that she had wanted to, and she was deeply sorry for letting him down.
You bowed your head to the man after softening your kimono, overwhelmed with gratitude for the kindness he had shown you. "Thank you so much, sir," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "Thank you for taking care of me," you added with your head still bowed, "but I will never forget the hospitality you have offered me. I am forever in your debt."
He had to admit that you were a pretty one. You must have been tasty, but on the other hand, it would be a shame to simply consume you. Perhaps he could keep you around as a pet? He had tried it before, but it didn't work out as he had wanted. Maybe if you behaved, who knows?
With a smile, he said, "Oh, no need to thank me, sweetheart! How could I say no to someone in need? I am happy to finally see you in good shape. What's your name, dear?"
You dared to raise your head a little to take a closer look at him.
He stood before you with an imposing presence. He was a tall and muscular young man with a noticeably pale complexion, and his long and pointed nails seemed stained with a pale blue color. His hair was either silver or a pale golden blond, parted to the left, with shorter strands flaring out to either side of his face and a longer spiral drape down his back. His eyes were incredibly rare and beautiful, appearing to be made up of an array of rainbow pastel tones that faded into one another as they circled his irises. You caught yourself staring in his eyes a little longer than you were supposed to, so you instantly bowed your head once more, trying to pay proper respect to him. "My name's Y/N, sir. If not you and your people, I'd be long dead, eaten by wild animals or maybe even demons themselves."
If only you knew! Douma couldn't help but giggle softly at the idea of how oblivious you were. It was adorable!
"Well, then I guess you are the lucky one. Do you have any family or a home?"
You hesitated for a moment before admitting, "It's just that I don't have a family or a home. Sometimes it feels like something's missing."
He quickly walked up to you and cupped your cheeks, rubbing your soft, warm skin with his slender, cold thumbs. "Well, well, Y/N, not only were you saved, but you have also found a new home. You can stay here, and I will gladly take care of you."
You were shocked by how cold his hands were. You could feel the icy chill radiating from his fingers as they pressed against your skin. The sudden coldness caught you off guard, and you couldn't help but shiver at the sensation. You had never felt hands that cold before, and it left you momentarily speechless. Despite the coldness, however, his touch was gentle, and you could sense the kindness in his eyes as he spoke to you. You forced yourself to focus on his words, trying to ignore the frigid sensation spreading through your cheeks.
You were shocked by the man's kindness and hospitality he and his people had shown you. 
He had taken you in when you were lost, hurt and alone, and had even offered to help you still. You couldn't believe that someone who was a stranger to you could be so generous. "Thank you so much," you said, your voice filled with gratitude. "I don't know how to repay you for your kindness, sir."
"You don't need to thank me, sweetheart. I only hope that dear Aka will explain everything you need to know," he said, looking at the other woman significantly. "Now, rest some more and make sure you eat well. I will come back later to have a private conversation with you."
"Sir," you whispered hesitantly, barely moving your lips. "Can I at least have your name?"
"It's Douma," he said with a smile. "If you listen carefully to what Aka says, my dear Y/N, you will know everything."
As you and Aka were speaking together after Douma had left the chamber, she began to describe him to you. "He is a wise man," Aka said, her voice soft with reminiscence. "He has a way of seeing the world that few others could match. When he speaks, it is as if the entire room fell silent, hanging on his every word."
You nodded, listening intently as Aka continued to speak.
"Master Douma is also fiercely loyal to his followers," she added, a small smile crossing her lips. "He would do anything to protect us, to ensure our safety and happiness."
You couldn't help but feel a sense of admiration for the man she described. Even though you had only met him briefly, you could sense that there was something special about him.
As your conversation with Aka continued, you couldn't help but feel a growing sense of curiosity about the man known as Douma. What other secrets and wisdom had he imparted to his followers? And what was his ultimate goal in life? These were questions that you knew you would have to seek answers to in the days and weeks to come.
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The longer you stayed with Douma, the more he grew fond of you. It was obvious that you had become his favorite, as you were the only one living with him permanently. He kept you safe and took care of you the best way he could.
You were like his little pet, and he loved making sure that you were happy because you looked better that way. You were always so eager to talk to him and spend time with him, which he found simply adorable. He could have feasted on you, but keeping you around was much better - it made the boring times more interesting.
"What's going through that little head of yours?" Douma asked, getting comfortable on a big pillow while he played with your hair, your head resting on his lap.
You lay with your head rested on Douma's lap, looking up at the ceiling of his room with a mixture of thoughtfulness and disbelief. "I can't believe you took me under your wings," you told him. "And you never wanted anything in return." You closed your eyes, feeling a sense of contentment wash over you.
The past few weeks you spent by Douma's side were a whirlwind of new experiences and insights. You followed him everywhere, learning who he was and how he lived his life. He introduced you to his followers, who welcomed you with open arms and showed you the ropes.
However, as you grew closer to Douma, you began to notice some of his followers becoming jealous. They would shoot you looks of disdain and make snide remarks when you were around. At first, you tried to brush it off, but as time went on, their behavior began to wear on you.
Despite the jealousy of some of his followers, Douma continued to show you kindness and respect. He patiently answered your questions and taught you his ways, never once making you feel inferior. You were grateful for his guidance and felt privileged to be so close to him.
In the end, you knew that Douma's influence had changed you for the better. You had learned so much from him, not only about his ways but about yourself as well.
As the weeks went by, you felt yourself growing more and more fond of him, and sometimes even felt strange tickling within your abdomen when he was casting you a glance over the room full of his followers.
You turned to Douma, feeling at ease in his presence. "I feel very well here," you told him, "but I'd like to visit my little hut and take some things from there. I'd also like to visit my brother's grave."
"And for what? You have everything here. You don't need your old stuff or to visit your brother," he rolled his eyes, growing slightly annoyed with your idea. He had given you everything, and yet you still cared about something so silly and trivial. Your brother was nothing but a corpse, rotting in the ground. "Besides, would you really leave me here all alone and sad? Do you want me to die of a broken heart?" He asked dramatically.
"I..." You whispered, turning your glance away from him. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to upset you, Douma."
Your mind wandered to your brother's grave. You thought about how much you missed him and how you wished you could visit him more often. The cemetery was only a few miles away probably, and you knew you could easily sneak out during the night for just an hour or two. You promised yourself that you'd do it, that night or some other time when Douma wouldn't notice, being busy with his errands.
"You didn't upset me, my dear Y/N. It just hurts me that you worry about those things when I make sure you have everything," he purred, easily pulling you up and setting you comfortably on his lap. His arms wrapped around your waist as he hugged you. "Don't you feel good here, with me?"
You looked deeply into Douma's eyes, feeling the warmth of his presence wash over you. "Douma," you whispered, reaching out slowly to caress one of his cheeks gently, "I want you to know that I feel really good by your side. You make me feel safe and sound, and I'm grateful for that." You paused for a moment, taking in the way his eyes sparkled in the dim light casted by a lot of candles set around the room. "You know, I never thought I could trust someone so completely, but with you, it just comes naturally."
The demon purred at your touch and nodded. You were his and there was no need for you to seek anything else beyond what he could give you. "Now you see, I can give you everything you ask for, so there is no need to visit your old life, my sweet little Y/N," he whispered before kissing your cheek.
As Douma leaned in to kiss your cheek, you felt your face flushing with a warm hue. His lips were cold, yet soft and tender against your skin, and you couldn't help but feel a flutter in your chest. "Douma," a weak whisper left your parted lips as you clutched on his shoulders. You moved your head to face him, your cheeks still tinged with pink. "You're right, just as always, my dear master."
He laughed, gently grabbing and squeezing your cheeks. "Look at you! So pretty and cute," Douma chuckled as he played with your soft skin, grazing it with his sharp nails. "I am wondering... If this made you blush so much, then what will this do?"
He grasped your cheeks a bit harder than before and kissed your lips.
Once Douma's lips were pressed to yours, you couldn't help but let out a quiet gasp that quickly turned into a moan. Despite his lips being rather cold, the kiss he offered tasted sweet like honey. The way his tongue moved along your teeth, the way his perfect teeth grabbed your tongue, everything about the kiss was igniting emotions you didn't know you still held within you.
You found yourself wrapping your arms around Douma's neck, pulling him closer to you. You felt his body pressing against yours, his closeness enveloping you. The scent of him filled your nostrils, a heady mix of sandalwood and musk.
Your heart raced as you lost yourself in the moment, feeling completely consumed by the passion between you. For a moment, nothing else mattered but the two of you, locked in a fiery embrace.
You pulled yourself away from Douma after a while, looking him in the rainbow-coloured eyes; his eyes were mesmerizing, and you couldn't help but get lost in them for a moment. "Douma…"
"So pretty and so full of color," he laughed, moving his thumbs across your skin.
Douma indeed enjoyed having you here. He loved that you were such a good pet. He had grown used to having you around, especially loving it when you sat on his lap.
Of course, Douma was aware of the jealousy of some followers, and as a good owner, he took care of some of those who were a threat to his beloved pet. When you noticed this, he explained that they had just left. Thankfully, you always accepted this explanation.
"It's getting late. Aren't you tired?" Douma asked, a hint of worry within his tone.
"Just a little bit, my master," you replied, your cheeks still flushed. You bit your lower lip after his comment about you having a lot of colours. You didn't know how he was doing it, but he was always making your heart skipping a beat.
"Well, then don't sit up late, little one. I want my little girl to be well-rested," he kissed your cheek one last time before gently pushing you off his lap.
You tried your best to keep your composure, but your heart was racing and your felt like whining as Douma pushed you off his lap. Your cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "Good night, my master," you smiled at him, bowing your head down. 
After that you left his chamber. Of course you had to bump on a group of his the most dedicated followers; their led you down the corridor with a mean glances, and you could swear you heard them whispering about you. Yet, you decided to not pay attention.
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You had trouble sleeping, tossing and turning in your bed as the memory of Douma's anger haunted you. You had mentioned leaving the shrine, hoping to visit your brother's grave, but the expression on Douma's face had been rather a nasty one; you'd never seen him like that; the change within him was immediate and unexpected.
You tried to push the memory away, to think of other things, but it kept coming back to you, replaying over and over in your mind. You wondered for a second or two if you had made a mistake in confiding in him, in trusting him with your deepest desires and fears.
As the night wore on, you grew more and more exhausted, but still, you couldn't sleep. You finally decided that you couldn't stay in the bed any longer. 
You got up from your bed, trying to be as quiet as possible so as not to wake anyone. You changed into some other clothes, careful to pick things that wouldn't make too much noise as you moved. You didn't want anyone to know that you were leaving, especially not Douma. After putting on a thick fur Douma gifted you with some time before, you were ready.
You didn't want to attract attention by carrying too much, so you decided to leave your bag in the room. You checked your pockets for anything important, making sure you had your keys. 
Finally, you took a deep breath and opened the door to your room. You stepped out into the hallway, the floorboards creaking softly beneath your feet. You listened carefully for any sounds, but the shrine was quiet.
You made your way to the front door, your heart pounding in your chest. You turned the handle slowly, hoping it wouldn't make too much noise, and pushed the door open. A gust of cool air hit your face, and you stepped outside into the night. You closed the door behind you, trying to be as quiet as possible, and set off down the path, hoping that you were making the right decision.
Douma could come across as a silly man with his overly friendly behavior. He could seem like someone easy to fool, but oh, you were so mistaken!
A pair of rainbow eyes watched you leave from behind the golden fan. He knew it would happen, he knew you wouldn't really sit on your ass as you should. Douma knew you would be back, of course you would for there was nothing waiting for you out there. You had no reason to leave for good, but of course, you had to fulfill your little ideas.
"Bad, bad pet," Douma whispered to himself. He already planned how he was going to punish you and make you stay with him forever.
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As you arrived at the old graveyard, you felt a sense of melancholy wash over you. Memories of childhood days spent with your brother came flooding back, as you made your way to his final resting place. The grave was still and silent, surrounded by the peaceful stillness of the cemetery.
You took out the bouquet of flowers you had managed to gather. With careful hands, you placed them gently on your brother's grave. As you stepped back, you couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness as you remembered the good times you shared with him. Before you managed to regain your composure, you shed a tear.
The wind picked up, blowing gently through the trees, rustling the leaves and reminding you of the fleeting nature of life. You stood there for a few moments longer, lost in your thoughts, before finally turning to leave. As you walked away, you promised yourself that you would always remember your brother, and keep his memory alive in your heart.
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As you made your way towards the Eternal Paradise Faith shrine, you couldn't help but feel a sense of urgency. The sky was beginning to brighten, and you knew that the sun would soon rise. You quickened your pace, determined to reach the shrine before dawn.
Finally, you arrived at the entrance, and were greeted by the serene surroundings of the shrine. The air was thick with the scent of incense, and the sound of chanting people filled your ears. You took a moment to take in your surroundings, appreciating the peaceful atmosphere and the stunning architecture of the shrine.
Oh, you were a little oblivious bunny, so sure that you could get away with this little thing. 
He was going to let you think you were the smart one, that you could go behind his back. Douma honestly wondered if maybe you would tell him at some point, admit to your wrongdoings, and beg for forgiveness.
So he waited, pretending he knew nothing, letting you believe he was naive.
The whole day passed, and he heard nothing from you, and it made him mad. He summoned you to see him, just like he did every evening.
Despite feeling curious and a bit uneasy, you went straight to meet him after taking a long bath.
You stepped forward and pushed open the door to Douma's chamber, the hinges creaking as you entered. The room was dimly lit, with only a few candles casting flickering shadows across the walls. "My master, you summoned me."
He looked at you with a sweet smile, resting his cheek on his hand. "Here comes my favorite. Don't be scared, I simply missed you, my little Y/N."
You felt that there was something off about his behavior. It was difficult to put your finger on it, but there was a sense that he was holding something back or not being entirely truthful. Maybe it was the way his rainbow-coloured eyes were looking at you, as if they were about to pierce right through your soul or the hesitation in his voice when he spoke. Whatever it was, you couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't quite right. 
Taking a few steps, you came closer to his bed.
He blinked, feigning concern for you. "Is something wrong, my dear? Come here," he said, beckoning you to sit on his lap.
Once you were seated comfortably, he took your palm in his and gave your hand a little kiss. "What is bothering you? Is someone talking bad about you again?"
"It's not that, my master," you replied, trying to regain the control over your uncontrollably shaking body. "I... I just did something bad."
"Oh, you poor, little thing! You did something bad?" Douma hummed as both of his hands rested on your waist, caressing the soft curves. "Oh, I am sure you did... Or maybe you decided to go behind my back and visit your brother?" He asked. "Will you be a good girl and answer my question?"
As you sat on his lap, listening to him speak, your heart began to race when he mentioned your brother. Memories of last night's trip occupied your mind, and your anxiety only grew stronger with each passing moment. "I left the shrine without your permission."
"I understand that. So, now, can you be a good girl and answer my question?"
You only nodded your head, lowering your chin to avoid his gaze.
"Look at me," Douma ordered.
Once you looked at him, he gave you his kind smile, but his hands tightened on your waist, his long nails digging into your skin through the clothes. "Do you think I am stupid? Do you think I am a fool you can play around with?"
"Of course not, my master. I apologize for not obeying your order. Please, forgive me my reckless behavior, master Douma," you begged, most likely sounding like a pathetic whore.
"I should throw you out!" Douma snapped, squeezing you even harder. "I should throw you away and let you die in the wilderness like I didn't when my people found you."
His words grew louder and more aggressive with each passing moment, and you could feel your heart pounding in your chest.
As he continued to speak, you felt the tears forming in your eyes. You tried your best to hold them back, but the emotion was simply too overwhelming. You could feel the hot tears trickling down your cheeks, and you quickly wiped them away with the back of your hand.
"Oh, you're crying now? How pathetic," Douma chuckled. "You're alive only because I allowed you to live. I saved your life and didn't turn you into my next meal. You should be grateful for what I did! I gave you everything that you lacked in your life, and this is how you repay me?!"
In that moment, you wished you could simply disappear. You wanted nothing more than to escape from Douma's presence and find solace in the comfort of your own home. But you knew that you had to stay strong and face the situation head-on, even if it meant enduring the pain and discomfort that came with it. "I'm sorry. Please, master, forgive me."
"And what should I forgive you for? I should just get rid of you," he said, and soon after, he smiled. "You are a pretty, little thing. I should just end your life by devouring you."
As Douma continued to speak, you mustered up all of the courage you had left and spoke up. "I suspected that you were a demon," you said firmly, looking him straight in the eyes. "I've known for a few weeks now," you explained. "But I wasn't sure until now. Thank you for confirming it."
Douma looked at you and let out a maniacal laugh. "And what? Should I feel scared? Oh no! Y/N knows what I am," he pretended to be shocked before pushing you hard off his lap, so you fell to the cold floor.
Licking his lips, Douma looked at you. "And what shall I do with you now? It would be a shame to eat you, but it would be a waste to simply murder you and throw you away. I really don't want to stain my floors with your blood."
As Douma's words continued to cut deep, you sat frozen in shock, unable to move or even speak. Your body felt numb, as if you had been plunged into icy water, and your mind raced with a million different thoughts and emotions.
Despite the discomfort of the cold, hard floor beneath you, you remained in the same position for what felt like an eternity. But eventually, you were able to improve your posture, sitting back on your knees for better support. Your muscles were tense, and your fingers tingled with a strange numbness. "Well. You can do whatever you want. It's not that I have any influence here though."
Douma accepted the offer of 'doing whatever he wants,' which was an interesting proposal and he intended to make use of it. "If you say so, my dear. Let's consider it your way of apologizing to me."
Douma sat up and leant forward to you. His long fingers gently touched your cheek and then moved down, across the skin of your neck, until they reached the fabric of your kimono. He had personally picked it out to make you look even more beautiful. It was a shame to destroy it, but he could always get you a new one.
Douma's cold hands easily ripped the fabric open. "Look at you. So beautiful, yet so disobedient," he remarked, slowly running the tip of his tongue across his lower lip.
At first you only gasped, looking up at him with wide opened eyes. You wanted to ask what does he think he's doing, you wanted to run, you wanted to vanish; too many different emotions filled you up at the same time. "What..." You managed to whisper.
"Oh, don't play dumb, Y/N. I know you want me, no matter if I'm a demon or not," he smirked wryly. "I've always felt that, you little needy thing."
Looking him deep in the eyes, you sat up a little and removed your ripped kimono off; now only your black underwear was keeping you from his hungry eyes.
Douma observed you and nodded. "Now you're acting as you should, but as far as I'm concerned, you're still wearing too many clothes."
You slowly got up and reached to your back, unclasping your bra; your eyes never left his. You pushed the straps of your bra down your shoulders, letting it fall to the ground.
In the next step, you slipped fingers beneath the fabric of your panties and pushed them down your legs, stepping out of them in the end.
Finally, you listened to him as you should have from the very beginning. Finally, the bunny followed its master's wishes. "Good girl," he praised before getting comfortable on his favorite pillow. "What will you do now, I wonder?"
"May I get closer, my master?"
He gave you a nod, observing you curiously to see what would happen next; a ery smirk still glued to his lips.
You sauntered towards his bed, swaying your hips from left to right, and gradually seated yourself on the cushion. With a tinge of embarrassment coloring your face, you cautiously straddled his lap, trying to conceal your shyness.
"Now you feel embarrassed, sweetheart? Be brave, just like when you decided to betray my trust," Douma instructed, stroking your thighs.
His lap felt comfortable and welcoming, just as they always did.
Looking him in the eye, you reached your hands out and started unbuckling his belt with a sense of desire burning within your chest. You reached down and fumbled with the buckle for a moment, your fingers clumsy with anticipation. Finally, you managed to get it undone, and you let out a sigh of relief. The belt slipped free from his waist, and you felt a wave of satisfaction wash over you, as you licked your lower lip briefly.
Douma was already enjoying the sight of you. Finally, you knew your rightful place. He rested his chin on his palm as he observed you working.
Now that you were behaving, he was interested in seeing what you planned to do. "Just don't stop, little one. Show me how sorry you are."
With an unhurried pace, you opened the fly of his trousers and met his gaze, only to pause. "I... Well, I haven't done any of those things before, except for one time, but I was drunk and don't remember anything."
He looked at you in disbelief, raising one of his brows up, and sighed softly. Douma shouldn't have been that mad; at least he could teach you a thing or two.
He grabbed you and effortlessly flipped you both so that you were under him. "Oh, my poor, little bunny. I'm gonna teach you, don't worry."
His cold lips pressed a few gentle kisses to your cheeks before he started moving down your naked body, right between your legs.
Your abdomen swelled with an intense burning sensation, accompanied by an unbearable feeling of shame. "Douma, I deeply apologize for letting you down again..." You whispered quietly, and since you didn't know what to do with your hands, you tried to cover your breasts with them.
"Stop covering your body if you wish to avoid disappointing me once more. My dear, unwind and let yourself be at ease," he whispered, kissing the soft flesh of your thigh. He then dived between your parted thighs and started slowly lapping at your beautiful pussy.
You let out a moan as he continued to lap and lick at your sensitive areas, sending waves of pleasure throughout your body. 
You had never felt this way before with anyone else. The sensation that Douma was causing was intense and overwhelming. You couldn't believe that someone could make you feel this good.
As the pleasure spread throughout your body, filling every single cell with desire, you let go of your prudery and slipped your hands into his beautiful, blonde locks, moaning his name and trying to buck your hips to gain more friction.
His rainbow eyes looked up and took in the pretty expression you made for him. He couldn't wait to see that face again when he fucks you. 
He pulled away from you and bit the inside of your thigh.
As his teeth sank into your soft flesh, you couldn't help but moan. The bite was so powerful that his canines punctured through your skin, causing a few droplets of blood to surface. 
You grabbed him be a sleeve of his turtleneck and pulled him closer, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs tightly around his waist, kissing all over his sharp, perfect jawline.
"Oh, you're an eager one, aren't you?" He chuckled, pulling away to undress for you. Since you were in need, he couldn't keep you waiting for much longer.
Douma quickly got rid of his clothes and smiled, wrapping your legs around his waist tightly. He grasped his member and gave it a few jerks before moving it through your lips, teasing your clit. "Are you ready, sweetheart?" 
You watche him getting undressed while biting your lower lip, slipping one of your hands between your parted thighs to tease your clitoris.
Douma was a man with a lean and muscular build. He had striking features - a sharp jawline, high cheekbones, and beautiful lips. His eyes were an unusual rainbow color, and they glimmered with a mischievous and seductive light. His skin was cold to the touch, and he exuded an aura of danger and mystery. 
It all made you blush even harder, but a soft moan escaped through your parted lips when you felt his rock-hard cock rubbing through your folds. "Fuck me," you whimpered, looking him directly into his eyes.
He didn't think twice before pushing into you, watching your face twist in pleasure. His hand grasped your waist, pulling you gently as he thrusted in. He lowered himself and started whispering into your ear, "Look at you, getting fucked by a demon. I'm going to breed you nice and full."
Your nails dug into the skin on his back as he snapped his hips into you. 
The pleasure was immense, and all you could do was moan his name softly while rolling your head back, resting it on his pillow.
Douma didn't give you time to adjust, so at first, all of his thrusts felt like a burning fire within your core. Yet, with time, your walls loosened, welcoming his girth with anticipation.
Douma wrapped his hand around your neck, squeezing it as his hips moved even faster. His other hand moved between your bodies, pinching your clit. "That's it, my little flower, that's it."
Your whimpers and moans grew louder as he increased his brutal pace. You wrapped one of your hands around his wrist, which was set on your neck, and begged him to fuck you even harder. "Douma! Ah! Just like that!" You moaned loudly, trying to buck your hips into his to deepen his thrusts.
"My little whore, soon you will be nice and full, and then everyone will have a reason to be really jealous of you," he growled, snapping his hips even harder into you. The grip on your throat tightened; he was curious about how much you could take.
"H-harder!" You begged. "Can I... Can I try?"
He stopped and looked at you while stroking your calf. "Tell me what you want."
With all your strength, you flipped both of you over so that you were on top of him, his member still deeply buried inside your pussy. "That's better," you whispered, resting your hands on his broad chest and slowly bucking your hips back and forth, making sure to sink on his cock fully, deepening each thrust.
"You little fucking liar!" Douma growled through clenched teeth, grabbing your hips strongly, digging his digits in your soft flesh. "You said you haven't done any of those things, but look at you now, riding me like a whore."
"I didn't lie, master Douma," you moaned, rolling your head back a little at the pleasure spreading throughout your body. His grasp of your hips left you certain you would find some bruises there the next day. "I'm a quick learner."
"Show me what you have learned."
Supporting your weight on his chest, you increased your pace; your pussy started spasming around his already throbbing cock. "Oh! Oh! I'll cum!"
Douma smiled widely, "Very good, my little petal. Cum and let me fill your little, tight cunt up."
You grasped one of his hands and moved it up to your neck. With each movement you were feeling how his throbbing cock massaged your walls, pressing the sweet spot hidden there.
Douma's hand wrapped tightly around your neck as he sat up to thrust his hips into you even harder. "Don't hold it back, Y/N, cum for me."
Your movements became sloppy and the knot that once formed within your abdomen snapped; your cum milked his cock as you screamed his name, rolling your head back in an immense pleasure.
Douma let out a loud, guttural grunt as he came deep inside of you. The feeling of your warm insides filled with his slickly cum was something he craved so much since the day he laid his eyes on you. "That's my good girl. I think I can forgive you for that little thing from today."
You wrapped your arms tightly around his neck and hugged him, still letting him nestle his cock in you; gasping for air you barely understood what he was talking to you. His scent filled your nostrils and in the end, after calming down from your peak, you asked him quietly, "Aren't you mad at me anymore? I promise I won't be disobedient."
"If you keep that promise, I won't be mad. You know I like it when you listen to me, especially since I do a lot to take care of you," he said, slipping his hand in your hair, in the end resting it at the crown of your head, holding you there.
Slowly and carefully getting off of him, you looked him in the eyes. "Douma?"
"What is it, my little pet?"
"Do you really like me?"
"Obviously, I do. If I didn't, you would be dead as soon as you recovered. But here you are, and I am taking care of you."
After a few seconds of silence, you dropped another question. "Can I stay... Can I stay for the rest of the night with you?"
Douma rubbed his chin, pretending to think, before giving you a nod moments later. "Of course, I can't say no to my favorite girl."
After making yourself comfortable by his side, you blushed slightly, feeling your mixed, slick cums oozing out of your pussy. "Have you slept with your other worshippers, too?"
"Yes. I have been with both men and women before," he said simply with a little shrug. It wasn't anything special for him. "But it was a long time ago. Don't worry, you are my special girl, my one and only."
Your eyes widened and you truly wanted to comment and asked more questions about that, but you decided to stay quiet. Instead, you dropped yet another question. "Can I be a demon too?"
"Oh no, you are too cute for that," he chuckled and booped your nose. "But maybe one day, if I decide that I want you to stay with me for eternity, we'll think about that."
"So if you're a demon, my lord, are there other demons out there? I heard a lot of stories, and people were always talking, but I haven't seen one myself. Are they having their cults as well?"
"Oh yes, there are, and they won't hesitate to eat you up. So be grateful I took you into my care. With me, you will be safe," he assured you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. "And no, they don't have cults, as far as I know."
After resting your head upon his chest, you went silent for a moment, only to return to asking questions again. "Are you going to devour me one day?"
Douma let out a loud laughter and shook his head. "I don't fancy playing with my food, and I have decided that I want you to stay with me. Of course, if you keep being a brat and completely strip me of my patience, with a heavy heart, but yes, I will devour you."
You shivered and tried to hide your head under his shoulder. "Can I meet other demons? Are you having demon friends? Are they coming here to devour people as well?"
He looked at you, raising an eyebrow. "Oh, we do have afternoon tea quite often, but none of my friends enjoy it. Quite a shame, truly, but oh well, that's their problem. And no, I am not letting any of them lay an eye, or even six, on you."
You gritted your teeth and shivered once again, not being sure if he was being serious. "Have I ever bumped into one of them, not being aware?"
Douma looked at you and placed his hand over your beating heart. "Well, since you are alive and here with me, the answer is no. You surely didn't bump into any demons without being aware."
You placed a few tiny kisses to his chest. "One last question, and I promise I'll let you rest. Why did you choose not to eat me once I was taken to your temple by your people? Oh, and are you the strongest demon? I think you must be."
Douma watched you, resting his head on his hand. "I just decided to let you live. Honestly, I planned to eat you as soon as you were nursed back to health, but I changed my mind," he shrugged a little, pointing at his eyes. "Not to brag, my dear, but I am the number two."
You once again tried to hide your head under his arm, but after a moment, you straddled his lap again, cupping his cheeks in your hands, taking a closer look into his eyes. Only then you noticed the number written in his irises. "Oh, my, how silly I was to not notice it! But truly, I don't care. To me, my lord is the strongest."
He grabbed your cheeks and pressed a quick kiss to your lips. "That's my smart girl. This is how things should be, little one. You make me more proud with every moment when you're acting like a good, obedient pet."
After the kiss you looked him deeply in his eyes. "Aren't you tired, my lord?"
"No, I am fine but you can rest, as all humans do. I will make sure my little petal is safe."
"Lord Douma?"
"Hmmm?"
"I love you…"
Douma was taken aback by your confession of love to him. Since he was a child, he was unable to fully understand human emotions, and the concept of love was something foreign to him. He stared at you for a moment, trying to process your words. In the end, with a soft smile, he gently grasped your chin between his slender fingers and kissed the bridge of your pretty nose. "I appreciate your feelings, but love is not something that I am familiar with. I care for you deeply, that's the fact, but I do not know if I can reciprocate your feelings in the same way."
"I understand, my lord. It means the world to me still," you got off of him again and made yourself comfortable on his chest, oh he was so soft, even if a little cold. 
With time, your eyes started closing and eventually you drifted off to sleep.
All Douma knew was that he wanted to keep you around. It seemed like you were already a much better pet than the last one, but he was going to keep watching you with his careful eye. If you ever got on his nerves again, he wouldn't hesitate to get rid of you in the most brutal way possible.
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roseghoul26 · 1 month
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Part 2
Arthur Morgan x f!Reader
"'Do you love me?' You asked, voice barely louder than a whisper.
Arthur nodded, gazing at you like you hung the moon and the stars.
'Then say it. I promise you, nothing bad is gonna come from it.'"
Synopsis: A retelling of the mission "Blessed are the Peacemakers", where instead of Arthur getting kiddnapped, it's you.
Tags: fluff, friends to lovers, eventual smut, smut, torture, mentions of sexual assault, no actual SA, dutch is father figure, so is hosea, arthur morgan deserves everything, fem reader, afab!reader, she/her pronouns used for reader, not beta read
Author's Note: this was meant to be a short one shot lmao i got so carried away with this
part 1 ❉ part 2 ❉ part 3 ❉ part 4
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For what felt like the millionth time over the past few days, Arthur glanced beside him, expecting to see you riding beside him, the sunlight illuminating your face in a way that took his breath away. And, for the millionth time, it was still only Charles, who had joined him on his search for you over the past days.
After you failed to show at the designated meeting spot after the negotiations, he had to practically be dragged to camp by the other men. “She’ll be fine,” Dutch had said. “You know how she gets sometimes. She’s probably out helping some stranger on the side of the road. She’ll be back before you know it.”
Deep down, he knew something was wrong, but he still allowed himself to be led back, keeping an eye out for you or your horse. After waiting in camp for an hour or two, he decided enough was enough, speeding out before anyone could stop him. He knew you could handle yourself, but something about the whole situation felt wrong. You were never gone for this long without letting him or someone else in camp know. 
It only took a few minutes of fast riding before he returned to the meeting spot, climbing the hill to where you had perched. With a keen eye, he scanned over the area, nothing standing out to him except a small splatter of mysterious liquid a few feet away, barely visible in the dirt.
Stepping closer, his suspicion was correct, causing bile to creep up his throat. 
It was blood. More specifically, your blood, something he never wanted to see.
Crouching down, he took in the surrounding area. A path cut through the dusty ground, like something was dragged through it, before stopping at a set of hoofprints, receding down the hill with another set in tow, like the other horse was being led.
All Arthur could hear was his heartbeat anxiously pounding as he remounted, taking off down the hill, following the barely visible tracks as best he could. He managed to follow about a mile, nearly reaching Valentine, before other hoofprints intertwined with the track he was following, making it impossible to continue following.
“Shit,” Arthur cursed, scrubbing his face with his hand as he figured out what to do. If you had been kidnapped, which was apparent, then someone had to have seen something in town. You’d have been slung over the rump of the horse, which he figured someone might remember if they saw.
It was about two hours later when he left town, having gotten a lead from some of the residents about someone carrying someone through town, heading southwest toward Strawberry. The sun had long since set, and as he rode back to Clemens Point, he was lost in his thoughts.
He had to finally admit to himself that the things he felt for you went beyond a normal friendship. Friends don’t wonder what it would be like to hold you in the night. Friends don’t wonder how your lips would feel, how your hands would feel, how your body would feel. Friends sure as hell don’t lie awake at night fantasizing about you, then be too embarrassed to meet your eye in the morning.
Your compassion towards him throughout the years was something he cherished, the way your face lit up when you saw him, or the way you held him when he confided in you about his troubles. Every moment with you filled something in his chest that he didn’t realize was empty. 
He hasn’t felt something like this toward anyone since Mary, but this felt different. This felt genuine, natural, like it was always meant to happen, born from years of trust. He had felt it for some time, but fear of ruining something great stopped him from saying anything. If his relationship with you crashed and burned the same way it did with Mary, his heart wouldn’t be able to take it.
He vowed to himself that he would tell you everything once you were safely back home.
“Who goes there?” He heard Charles shout out, barely registering he was back at camp.
“Just me,” Arthur sighed, slowing down to a trot as Charles came up beside him.
“Find her?”
“She's been taken… O’Driscolls took her through Valentine, heading southwest.”
Having only heard Charles swear only a few times, it took him by surprise when he heard the man mutter a curse under his breath, escorting Arthur as he entered camp, still staying on his horse. A light pat on his leg caught him off guard. “Rest up. We’ll head out at sunrise.”
“I’m just grabbin’ a few thing. She ain’t… I ain’t got time to sleep…” he trailed off, fighting back a conveniently timed yawn. “I can handle this myself.”
“She’s my friend too, you know. Maybe not as close as you two, but I care about her. And don’t think you’d survive ambushing a camp of O’Driscolls by yourself,” Charles shook his head, turning and walking back to his guard post, keeping his eyes on Arthur. “I only got a half hour left on my shift. We’ll rest until sunrise and head out. Neither of us will be able to help her if we’re dead on our feet.”
After failing to move, he watched the hunter turn back around, his face calm despite his words. “Don’t make me pull you off that horse, Arthur.”
He couldn’t help rolling his eyes, dismounting before walking toward his tent, sitting down on his cot with his head in his hands, hat left on the nightstand next to him. “Hang on, princess,” he muttered, as if it was going to help anything, before trying his hardest to get any semblance of rest.
True to his word, Charles woke him at the crack of the rising sun, and he left a note for the others letting them know where he was going, just in case. That was roughly four days ago, nowhere close to finding you than before. 
He just prayed he would get to you in time.
─•~❉᯽❉~•─
“Miss Grimshaw, I need help!” Dutch’s panicked voice jolted you to consciousness, your eyes squinting against the harsh sunlight, bringing your arm up to block against the intrusion, before realization settled in.
Dutch was talking. 
You were home.
Instantly you were awake, bolting upright into a sitting position, scaring the hell out of said man, who you saw take a step back, before rushing to your side. 
You could barely understand the words coming out of your mouth, your eyes finally clearing as you took in the leader of your group kneeled before you, relief etched across his face. “It’s Colm- Dutch, I-, he–” you were almost hyperventilating as your eyes darted around manically, your body and mind suddenly overwhelmed. 
Two hands grabbed your face, focusing your attention on the man in front of you. “Breathe, my dear. Just. Breathe.”
Following his instructions, you took a deep breath in, and out, repeating the action until your heart rate slowed down a tick. Miss Grimshaw, at this time, was by your side now, asking you questions that you were too out of it to hear. “Dutch, it was Colm. I- It was a setup. He took me. But I got away.” You only noticed you were crying when Dutch wiped away the tears with a handkerchief, something almost fatherly in the action. “I got away.” You repeated, more to yourself than anything. 
A rare, true smile graced Dutch as his hands moved from your face to your shoulders, being mindful of the obvious injury there. “Yeah, that you did. But you’re safe now.”
“He was gonna set the law on us, Dutch.”
“Of course he was.” Sighing, you felt Dutch’s grip on you let up as he stood. “But that’s not a problem for you to worry about right now. All you need to focus on is getting better, okay?”
Nodding, you went to try and stand, almost collapsing until you felt Miss Grimshaw on your right side sling your arm over her shoulders, allowing you to rest your weight on her. She led you to your cot, Dutch following behind with his arms out like you were a child learning to walk for the first time. Exhaustion made its presence known again, and you felt your head grow fuzzy, black spots dancing across your vision.
You were almost fully tucked into your cot before a new thought caused you to sit right back up, earning you a disapproving sigh from Miss Grimshaw. “Where’s Arthur?”
Dutch, who stood at the entrance of your tent, left, and you heard him shout to Javier. “Go track down Arthur. Tell him his girl’s home.”
Glancing over to Miss Grimshaw, you asked again. “Where’s Arthur?”
Cupping your hand in hers, she responded. “Him and Charles are out looking for you. Have been since you’ve been gone.”
“How long was I gone for?”
“About four days, dear. You gave us quite a fright.”
“And he’s… they’ve been out looking for me?”
She rolled her eyes, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Of course. People really care about you, you know. Arthur especially. But,” she pressed down on your good shoulder, making you lay down flat on the bed, “you need sleep. Javier’ll find him in no time. He’ll be here when you wake.” 
Your hand in hers was the last thing you remember before sleep overcame you.
─•~❉᯽❉~•─
“Nothing here,” Charles shouted from a closeby building as Arthur investigated the small hut, long since abandoned, the rotting floorboards barely holding him as he searched.
Opening the final room and meeting only dust bunnies and brown rats, he holstered his gun, his increasing anxiety causing his heart to beat wildly. “Same here,” he shouted back, exiting the building with a huff, sitting down on the dilapidated staircase as Charles approached him. 
He was getting desperate at this point. They had searched what felt like every abandoned campsite and building, no sign of you or O’Driscolls anywhere. Not allowing himself to go down a rabbit hole, he pulled out his map, spreading it across his lap so Charles could look as well. With his pencil, he crossed off their current location, another X added to the page.
Weariness was also starting to take a toll on him, not as alert as he was days prior, the same going for Charles, but neither of them would be able to stop until they’d found you. Muttering under his breath, he scanned the map for their next location, reaching for his revolver when he heard the sound of fast hoof beats approaching the two of them.
Glancing up, a familiar black and white horse whizzed past, skidding to a halt as the rider practically jumped off, running up to the startled duo.
Javier stood before them, hair in disarray, panting as heavily as his horse, who gladly took a break from a straight dash from camp. Arthur couldn’t read the man’s expression, and he stood up warily, the map falling somewhere in the dirt. There was only reason why Javier was here, a fact that Arthur and Charles seemed to understand at the same time, anxiously waiting for the man to speak.
“She’s home.”
─•~❉᯽❉~•─
A new hand held yours when you woke.
It was significantly larger than Miss Grimshaw’s, strong callouses adorning the fingers, yet despite that roughness it held your hand like it was the most precious thing in the world.
When it felt you begin to stir, it held on a little tighter, a sigh of relief coming from the owner. Groggily, you opened your eyes slightly, almost immediately wanting to close them as the sunlight streaming from the entrance of the tent nearly blinded you, and you tried rolling over, crying out in pain as you rolled on to your left shoulder, having completely forgotten about the wound there.
“Easy there, princess,” Arthur murmured, the low gravel of his voice music to your ears. 
Moving slowly, you glanced over to your side, smiling gently at the rugged cowboy who held your hand. “Hello-” a coughing fit wracked your body, throat dry from dehydration. Within seconds Arthur was right at your side, using his free hand to prop you up, rubbing your back as you coughed. 
After a few seconds the fit subsided. Groaning, you rubbed at your eyes, your hair falling around your face. Arthur’s hand moved from your back, and you nearly let out a noise of complaint until he presented you with a waterskin, which you gladly took and began to greedily gulp down.
The water, despite being a tad bit warm, felt amazing, some of it spilling from your mouth and onto your lap. As you drank, you heard him call out for Miss Grimshaw, loud enough to be heard, but not loud enough to startle you. Within seconds the tent flaps swished open, Miss Grimshaw standing with her hands on her hips as she looked you up and down, a small smile on her face. “Well, it’s about time you woke up.”
She pressed her hand against your face, feeling for any sort of fever. “How’re you feeling?”
Bringing down the water skin, which Arthur took away to stop you from making yourself sick from drinking too much. “I feel like I was hit by a train. Everything hurts.”
Removing her hand from your face, she quickly left the tent, returning moments later with a tonic in her hands, opening and offering it to you. “For the pain,” she simply said, gesturing for you to drink it.
It burned as it went down, the bitter concoction instigating another coughing fit, luckily shorter than the other. Arthur took the empty bottle from your hands, tossing it behind him somewhere in the tent as Miss Grimshaw sat in front of you on the cot, beginning to remove the bandage that now covered your left shoulder.
Glancing down, you noticed that someone had cleaned you, the grime from the O’Driscolls basement nowhere to be seen, replaced by a fresh nightgown and clear skin. Well, clear in the sense that there wasn’t a speck of dirt on you. Various cuts, bruises, and burns adorned your body, most of them having already scabbed and on the way to be completely healed. Only a few were bandaged up, the worst being the gunshot wound on your shoulder.
While you had taken in the state of your body, Miss Grimshaw had been able to fully remove the bandage from your shoulder, and you let out a wince as the air hit the wound. The wound, you saw, wasn’t infected, but it was irritated, glaring red as Miss Grimshaw applied a slave to it, tears pricking your eyes at the pain. 
You felt Arthur begin to rub your hand soothingly, murmuring small praises as she redressed the injury. “You’re healing well. Won’t be too long until you're back on your feet,” Miss Grimshaw spoke, brushing her hands on her skirt as she stood. “Just make sure you’re getting lots of rest, drinking lots of water, and eating good food. That one right there will make sure you do,” she winked at Arthur, who looked away embarrassed. “I’ll let the others know you’re awake. Visitors, or no?” When you shook your head no, she nodded in understanding. Turning to leave, she paused right at the entrance, before glancing back over at you. “It’s good to see you awake, dear.”
Before you could get a chance to respond, she left, leaving you and Arthur alone, still holding each other's hands. You felt your hair, which still hung around your face, begin to move as Arthur tucked it behind your ear, smiling lightly as he finally was able to make eye contact with you. There was obvious relief in his eyes, but something vulnerable there as well. You noticed the dark circles beneath his eyes, and noticing the chair pulled up to the side of your bed, as well as some of his personal belongings sitting beside him, you were able to quickly piece together that Arthur had been at your side the entire time you slept. 
An unfamiliar yet not unwelcome pang hit your heart as you took in the man beside you, the man who was unyieldingly devoted to you, and the man you were so helplessly in love with. In any other circumstance, you would have pushed those thoughts away, but now you let them wash over you, sweeping away all the ache in your bones. You felt yourself smiling brightly at the cowboy, the cuts on your face making their presence known as the skin moved, but you couldn’t care less. All that mattered right now was Arthur. 
Glancing down at your entwined hands, you let out a content sigh, before bringing his knuckles up to your lips, giving them a quick kiss before letting it fall back to your lap. Your heart hammered fast in your chest as you opened your mouth, ready to spill your most closely guarded secret to the man beside you. “I’m-”
“I’m sorry,” Arthur said at the same time, his louder voice covering yours, the confession stuck between your lips as you sealed them back up, and you furrowed your brows, momentarily forgetting what you were about to do. 
“I’m sorry.” Arthur went to stand up, his stoic mask back up, trying to disentangle your hand from his, but you held on as tight as you could, stopping him from pulling away completely. “I’ll… I’ll leave you be now. Said you didn’t want visitors.”
“You know damn well that doesn’t mean you, Arthur Morgan,” you nearly growled, your voice scratchy as you tried to pull him back down to his seat. When he didn’t budge, you sighed, tugging lightly at him. “Please stay,” you whispered, and you could see the war being fought in his head as he stood there, unmoving. 
A minute passed before he relented, letting you drag him back down to his seat with what strength you had. He was looking at you, but he wasn’t making eye contact, instead taking in every injury on your body that you had obtained at the hands of the O’Driscolls, squeezing your hand tighter as his gaze settled on your shoulder. 
“I’m sorry,” you heard him apologize for the third time, and you just shook your head at him.
“And I still don’t know what you’re apologizing for, mister. You weren’t the one to do this to me, right?”
“God, no,” he replied, visibly disgusted at the notion. 
“Then you have nothing to be sorry for.”
Shaking his head, you saw him bring himself closer to you, the chair gliding through the pelt that lined the floor of your tent. “I knew it was a trap. If I hadn’t made you-”
You cut him off by pressing your finger to his lips, silencing him as his eyes widened in shock and disbelief. “We all knew it was a trap, Arthur. But the thought of having any sort of peace with the O’Driscolls made us turn a blind eye. And you didn’t make me do anything. I went of my own free will. And besides,” you removed your finger, failing to notice how his eyes had darkened slightly during the whole action. “If it wasn’t me who got taken, then it would’ve been you or the others. It was inevitable.” 
“It shouldn’t’ve happened.”
You shrugged. “Maybe not. But it did. It’s done now. We gotta move on now.”
“Next time I’ll be doing overwatch.”
“Like hell you are,” you scoffed, some of the tension leaving the conversation. “I’m the better shot, anyway.”
Arthur raised his eyebrows, leaning back slightly in his chair away from you. You tried to not look disappointed. “Is that so?”
“Yup,” you nodded vehemently, smirking slightly. “Best shot in the camp, hands down.”
“Uh-huh. Wanna go prove that to me then?”
“I ain’t got nothing to prove to you, Arthur, and you know it,” you laughed.
“Nah, you’re right,” he conceded. “You’re incredible.”
The total honesty in his voice caught you off guard, and you felt a slight flush creep up your face, no doubt turning your cheeks dark. Glancing away, the two of you fell into an easy silence that only came with him, and he mindlessly stroked your hand. 
A few moments had passed before you looked back up at him, a crease in his brow, deep in thought, barely even registering your movement as he hung his head low. Shaking his hand slightly, you were able to get him to look up at you, giving him an easy smile. “What’s on your mind, cowboy?”
Looking like a fish out of water with the way his mouth gaped, he rubbed the back of his neck, no longer looking you in the eye as he fumbled with the words he was trying to say. It was almost silly, seeing the deadly man before you, someone who could send a person running with only a glance, at a loss of words. “Why’re you nervous? It’s just me,” you reassured him. 
Or at least you tried to reassure him, your words stressing him more than relaxing him. “How’d you…” be began, trailing off shortly thereafter. 
“I’m a mind reader.”
“You ain’t a mind reader. If you was, then I wouldn’t have to sit here, stumbling over my words like an idiot trying to figure out how to tell you…” he trailed off again, sighing anxiously, his face almost beet red. 
“You’re not an idiot,” you chided, moving to sit on the edge of the bed, your knees knocking against Arthur’s. You ignored the butterflies erupting in your stomach at the proximity, bringing your hand up to cup the side of his face to bring his gaze back to yours. You tried to move your hand away but he caught it, keeping it pressed against his cheek. “And, even if I could read your mind, I’d wanna hear it from your lips anyway.”
He pressed his forehead against yours, collecting his thoughts for a moment. “I’ve been… I’ve been real scared to tell you this, you know. Everytime I try, the words just don’t come out right, and I ain’t too keen on making a fool of myself in front of you. I just… I hope this don’t change things between us… I don’t think I’d be able to live without you by my side. And if you don’t feel the same… which I pray that you do… then we never have to talk about this again. We’ll just move on, like you said.”
He pressed a quick kiss to the inside of your wrist, his beard pleasantly tickling the sensitive skin. A little gasp left your lips, the cowboy chuckling in response. But he didn’t continue speaking, his own anxieties halting his words. You knew what he was going to say; it was on the tip of his tongue. He just needed a push. 
“Do you love me?” You asked, voice barely louder than a whisper. 
Arthur nodded, gazing at you like you hung the moon and the stars. 
“Then say it. I promise you, nothing bad is gonna come from it.”
“How is that you make me feel so calm yet terrified?” Arthur sighed gently. “When you were taken… it made me realize how big a fool I really am for you. And I almost didn’t get to tell you… I was ready to tear down every O’Driscoll until you were back home. But you went and saved yourself, cause of course you did. I wasn’t kiddin’ when I said you was incredible. You’re back home now, so now I get to tell you I love you. I really, really do.”
He let out a shaky exhale, a visible weight being let off his shoulders. “I have for a while now… but I just kept pushing it away and denying it. After what happened the last time I bared my heart out for someone, I was scared of it happenin’ again. I knew you wouldn’t hurt me… but a part of me refused to let me feel this way. I’m… I’m not a good man. I’ve done bad things, I’ve hurt people. Maybe I don’t deserve you, but I’m selfish enough to want you anyway. If you want me too, then I will spend the rest of our time together proving that I am worthy enough to be by your side.”
“Oh, Arthur,” you felt tears beginning to well up after finally hearing the words you’ve been waiting for for some time. “You silly man. I love you, too.” Despite the tears, you were smiling brightly, a similar expression mirrored on Arthur. You felt giddy, laughter bubbling from your lips. “I love you so much, and there is nothing you could do that would change that. And you don’t have to prove anything to me. The man right here is all I need.”
Blue eyes looked down at your lips, the distance between the two of you was so close yet so far, lips merely inches from your own with your foreheads connected. You watched as Arthur wet his lips, looking back up into your eyes with a look of longing. 
“May I kiss-'' your lips pressed against his before he could finish the question, silencing him the way you wish you could have earlier. The cowboy let out a surprised grunt, the momentum of your body pressing against his nearly sending him backwards, his hat sitting precariously on his head. It only took him a second to recover from the shock before his lips moved, plush but chapped yet perfect in every sense. 
Using the hand still cupped to his face, you moved it behind, scratching your nails lightly up the back of his neck before tangling your fingers in the short hair, tugging slightly. A delicious whine left Arthur, mouth parting slightly against yours as the kiss deepened. You felt his hold on your hand leave, instead grabbing your hips and pulling you towards him so you were practically on his lap.
All you could think about was Arthur. He flooded every sense, every fiber of your being fully enraptured by the man. So enraptured, in fact, that you temporarily forgot the trauma that your body had just been subjected to, so when you tried to use your left arm to situate yourself better, a shock of pain overtook you, forcing you to break away from his lips with a pained groan. 
Immediately, whatever love fueled haze had flooded the two of you dissipated, leaving a concerned Arthur holding you as pain tore through your body, before dissolving into an incessant ache. “Shit… sorry,” you were panting, out of breath for two incredibly different reasons. 
“Nothing to apologize for. You alright?”
“Got a little eager,” you smiled a tad bit sheepishly. “I’ve been wanting to do that for a while.”
“So we’ve both been fools this entire time?” When you nodded, he laughed, partially in disbelief. “And only a little eager?” he jested, rubbing his scalp tenderly. 
“Yeah… sorry.”
“And I said there was nothing to apologize for. Besides,” he brought his lips close to your ear, voice rumbling as he spoke. “I like it when it hurts a bit.” He sat up, pressing a kiss to your temple before doing so. 
The implications were not lost on you, yet you still found yourself staring wide-eyed at him. Noticing your hesitation, he backpedaled slightly. “If that’s alright. I don’t wanna force ya… or make you uncomfortable…”
“I’d like that, very much. Just not now, though. I’m exhausted.”
“It’s alright. We don’t gotta to do anything until you’re ready.” With a gentle smile, he gave you a quick kiss, pulling away too quickly for your liking. When you pouted slightly, he chuckled and shook his head. “There’ll be plenty of time for that later. You, princess, need rest.” You sighed, and with Arthur’s help you situated yourself back on the cot, still sitting up as he fixed the pillows behind you.
“Will you lay with me?” You thought he was going to say no, but he instead started toeing off his boots, setting them beside the bed before sitting behind you. A firm arm wrapped around your front, pulling you down to lay atop of him, your head resting comfortably on his chest. He kissed the crown of your head, and you snuggled into the man. The smell of him, a mix of gunpowder, leather, and something woodsy, filled your nose, lulling you into a relaxed state.
“I love you,” you mumbled out, face partially buried into his shirt. Gentle fingers combed through your hair, a pleased sigh leaving you as your eyes fluttered close. 
“I love you, too. Now, rest. You’ve got a long few weeks ahead of ya.”
─•~❉᯽❉~•─
The first day of your recovery was the worst. Not because of the aches in your body, but the fact that everyone in camp had decided to come see you sometime in the day. You were grateful, yes, but it was exhausting. As nice as it was, a  part of you just wished all the attention on you would go away. One more sympathetic look and you were going to throttle someone. 
Dutch came in first that morning (with your permission), two cups of coffee in his hands as he sauntered in. He looked a bit caught off guard when he saw Arthur sitting behind you, still partially asleep in your cot as you sat up in the bed. After the initial shock wore off, a large shit-eating grin took over his face.  
Setting one of the cups on the nightstand, he roughly patted the cowboy on his shoulder, who practically yelped at the sudden aggressive contact. “Atta boy, Arthur!” his boisterous laugh shook the tent, and you couldn’t help but laugh at the expense of Arthur. “Took you long enough. Thought you’d never grow the balls to tell her.” 
In a sudden change, his face took on a serious expression as he leaned down close to Arthur, talking quietly enough for only the other man to hear. Whatever he said must’ve scared Arthur, his face turning a few shades paler. But within moments laughter returned to the black haired man who now had his full attention on you, handing you a cup of coffee which you gratefully took. “It is good to see you up, dear. Nothing can keep you down can it?”
“Not so sure about nothing, but O’Driscolls sure as hell can’t.”
“No ma’am,” he chuckled, pulling up and sitting in the chair that Arthur was in last night. “And trust me when I say they’ll regret ever touching a single hair on you.”
You nodded, lightly sipping the hot beverage in your hands. “Just don’t do it without me.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Standing up, he gestured to the drink on the nightstand. “Help yourself to that Arthur. It was mine, but I wasn’t expecting you to have… company this morning. Now, get better quickly. Can’t have my best shot out of commision for too long.” With that, Dutch left your tent, Arthur giving a sigh of relief when he did. 
Glancing over at Arthur with an I told you so look, you found him still paler than normal, shifting uncomfortably behind you. Snuggling up into his arms seemed to snap him out of partially, but you still saw his eyes flicking across the room, like he was expecting danger to pop out from anywhere. “What’d Dutch say?” you asked, Arthur’s arms wrapping around you as your face buried into his shoulder. 
“I… nothing important, trust me,” he muttered, trying to brush over the question. Not taking that as an answer, you tilted your head to the side so you could look up at him, an unimpressed look on your face. Sighing, you felt his lips press a kiss to your forehead before he responded. “Let’s just say you got some… uh… guardians around camp.”
“Aw. That’s sweet.”
“Not so sweet when you’re the one getting threatened with gelding tongs,” you heard him mutter, and Arthur’s panicked look made a whole lot more sense now. You couldn’t help the giggles that erupted from you. 
“Did- did Dutch threaten you, Arthur?” you barely managed to get out. His answering sigh was all you needed for confirmation, and you felt another fit of laughter overtake you. Arthur wasn’t long to stay upset, feeling his chest rumble with a light laugh. 
“He’s always kept me in line. As best he could, anyway. But that’s enough about me. How’re you feeling, princess?” He sat beside you on the edge of the bed, wrapping an arm around you gingerly. Pulling you down, you felt him pull you towards him, giving you a kiss atop your head. 
“I’m feeling like I’m gonna be sick of that question soon.”
You swore you could hear him roll his eyes. “Just answer the question.”
With an exaggerated huff, you turned so you were facing, his arm and hand now in your lap. You intertwined your fingers with his. “I’m okay. Just really sore.”
“And…” Arthur tapped lightly on your forehead. “How ‘bout there?”
“Surprisingly alright. I… I don’t really remember too much, to be honest.”
“Well, that’s good. But, if something changes, or you need… ‘dunno… someone to talk to, let me know. I ain’t the best with words… but I can listen pretty well.”
“Thank you, Arthur.” With a smile, you pressed your lips against his cheek, the slight prickle from his beard tickling you. He didn’t let you move back too far, however. A light hand cupped the back of your head, keeping you steady, but not strong enough to keep you from moving if you wished. 
“And you said you was the best shot in camp. You missed.” Arthur had an almost cheeky smile on his face. 
Scoffing in fake indignation, you kissed him, a satisfied hum leaving the cowboy as your lips made contact. His one hand still made contact with your head, the other wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him. Running your own through his soft hair, another satisfied noise left him, and you pulled back with a pleased smile. “There. Happy?”
“Very. Now c’mere…” he said with a playful growl, before peppering kisses across your face, neck, and shoulders, being mindful of your injuries. You found yourself giggling as he continued his attack, turning into a yelp when you felt him nip lightly at your jaw. Lightly swatting at his shoulder, he moved back, still holding you gently. “You make me so happy, don’t you ever think otherwise.” With a final brush of his lips against yours, you watched his eyes flick behind you where the entrance to your tent was. Turning around, you saw Hosea standing there, tonic in one hand, a book in the other. 
Sitting back down at the edge of the bed, you gestured for the older man to come in, a soft look on his face as he sat in the chair in front of you. “So that’s why you weren’t at your tent, Arthur,” he commented, and the younger cowboy sheepishly looked away. “You’re looking better. At least, better than you did twelve hours ago. How’re you feeling?”
Fighting the urge to bash your head into the nearest hard surface, you gave him the same response you gave Arthur. With a nod, he handed you the tonic, the greenish bottle filled to the top with liquid. “For the pain. And,” he handed you the book, “For the boredom.”
It was a copy of A Cristmas Carol, a brand new one at that. You knew that Hosea was quite the reader, so it came as no surprise that he knew where the name of your horse came from. “I know it’s nowhere near Christmas time, but I hope it will bring you some comfort.”
“It will. I… Thank you, Hosea.”
“You’re very welcome, dear. Is there anything else you need?”
“I think… I think I’d like some food. Let me just…” with your feet planted on the ground, you tried to stand up, the idea of a fresh meal urging you to leave your bed. As soon as you were fully upright, however, the world began to spin. Two arms caught you before you made contact with the floor, Arthur having stood up when you did, and he eased you back down to the bed. 
At this point, Hosea was on his feet too, his hands planted on his hips like a parent would when scolding their child. “You’re in no state to be moving. Me ‘n’ Arthur will get your food for you. Just stay here.” Patting your right shoulder affectionately, he beckoned Arthur with a nod, the two of them leaving your tent together after Arthur put his boots back on. 
You calling out Arthur’s names stopped the cowboy in his tracks, a concerned look on his face as he turned to face you. “Please take some time for yourself. Change your clothes, take a bath, something like that.”
“You sayin’ I smell?”
“I’m sayin’ you smell like you haven’t been at camp for a few days. Now go.”
“Alright, princess,” Arthur laughed, a grin on his face as he left the tent.
For the first time since you’d been back, you were alone. The tent was eerily silent, the only noise your breathing and the rustling of sheets as you got back into bed, sitting up against the pillows. Grimacing, you downed the entire tonic bottle, the liquid bitter as ever. You set the empty glass on your nightstand, your throat already going numb from the ingredients. 
Waiting for Hosea to return with food, you thought over the events of the last couple of days. Most of it was hazy, in your brain. The only things you remembered were flashes of pain and the voices of the O’Driscolls. Everything else was gone, just blank spaces in your memory. Rubbing your face with your hand, you winced slightly as you pressed down a little too hard at what you assumed was a bruise on your cheekbone. You realized you had yet to see your face, unaware of the damage done to it. 
Sighing, you barely noticed that Hosea was back in the tent with you, a bowl of hot stew in his hands, the smell causing saliva to begin pooling in your mouth. Handing you the bowl, along with a fresh skin of water, the man returned to the chair next to you. 
“Don’t get too lost in those thoughts of yours. It’ll be hard to get you back out.”
“It’s not like there’s many thoughts in there anyway. I hardly remember anything that happened. I can’t tell if that should be concerning or relieving.” You said through spoonfuls of food, the temperature of it burning your mouth. 
“Did they do anything… untoward to you?” Hosea asked, hesitating slightly. 
You shrugged. “If they did, I don’t remember. But I don’t think so, saying nothing hurts down there.”
The older gunslinger let out a small sigh, his body relaxing some in relief. “Well, we can take some assurance that they aren’t animals.” He fell silent, giving you a few moments to eat. “Don’t be too worried about your memories. It’s common for our minds to shut out events that happened to us. Whether you want them to come back, however, is up to debate. Some events aren’t worth remembering.”
He fell silent again, lost in thought as you took another bite of your food. You were getting full now, your stomach not used to having so much food in it. You sat the bowl, which still had about half its contents left, on your nightstand. At the clattering of the bowl, Hosea seemed to snap out of whatever headspace he was in, giving you a small smile as he took the bowl. “Thank you,” he said while standing up, and you gave him a confused look.
“Thank you for coming back to us. To the gang. Lord knows what would happen to us if we lost you. Don’t know what would happen to Arthur, either.” He laughed humorlessly while shaking his head. “We’re all proud of you. I’m proud of you. You’re tougher than most, that’s for sure.” With a final kind smile, he left, leaving you, and your tears, to your lonesome again. Sipping lightly from the waterskin he left you, a gentle warmth growing in your chest from Hosea’s words. 
It seemed like the universe still didn’t want you to be alone, however, because before you could even collect yourself, a small body came barreling into your tent, a larger one following with an apologetic look on her face. “I’m so sorry,” Abigail began, trying to usher an eager Jack out of your space. “When he heard you was awake, he wanted to come see you, and I tried-”
“It’s all good, Abigail. I don’t mind the company.” You tried to brush away the remnants of your tears. Abigail didn’t see, or if she did, she didn’t make a comment about it. Either way, you were grateful.
An eager Jack stood beside your bed, a wide grin on his face. Stretching out his arms, he held in his fists a small bouquet of wildflowers, with various flower types that ranged from all sorts of different colors. Pressing a hand over your heart, you gratefully took the bouquet from Jack. “For me? Thank you, Jack. They’re beautiful. You wanna help me put them somewhere safe?”
When the boy nodded, you handed him the waterskin, and he held it like it was the most important thing in his life. Grabbing the empty tonic bottle from your nightstand, you held it in your lap. “Pour a small amount of water in, so I can get the old stuff out first.”
After doing what you asked, you swished the water around the bottle, clearing out any extra tonic residue that might be left over. Pouring it out somewhere behind your bed (avoiding the pelt that acted as your carpet), you gestured for him to refill the bottle again. This time, instead of dumping it back out, you placed the small bouquet in it, the opening of the bottle barely big enough to hold all the flowers. Carefully you put the bottle back on the nightstand, and when it didn’t tip over, you let out a celebratory clap. 
“Look how pretty those are, Jack! You picked out the best flowers.”
“I hope they make you feel better, Auntie Morgan. Ma says you got hurt real bad.”
“I bet they will,” you replied, not even registering what he said until a few seconds later. “Auntie Morgan? Where’d that come from?” 
Jack shrugged, and you saw Abigail give you yet another apologetic look. “Well, I saw Uncle Arthur leave your tent, and he never did that before. And Ma told me that when someone has a tent with someone, it means they are dating! And when you are dating, you have the same last name! So that means you are now Auntie Morgan!” 
“Oh… I mean… well…” You’re sure your face was significantly darker than it was moments ago as you stumbled over your words. 
“Jack!” Abigail reprimanded, a horrified look on her face at Jack’s comment. “I’m… I’m so sorry, I just… that’s the only way I knew how to explain it to Jack when he asked.”
“Well, you’re not entirely wrong. We are… I think.”
“You… you are? When you nodded, Abigail gasped excitedly. “Oh, well that’s wonderful! I’m happy for you!” She hugged you gently before taking a step back by her son. “It’s about time…” she teased, and you rolled your eyes. 
“I told you she was Auntie Morgan, Ma!”
“Not quite yet, Jack. We’re not married. Only married people have each other’s last names,” you tried to explain. 
“So are you gonna marry Uncle Arthur then?”
Thank goodness you hadn’t decided to take a drink of your water, or else it would've been spat out at his question. Your face felt flame hot at this point, and you nervously picked at your nails. “We’ve only just started dating, Jack. I… He hasn’t asked me that question yet.”
“Do you want to marry Uncle Arthur?”
“That’s enough!” Abigail practically jumped to cover Jack’s mouth. You laughed at Jack’s lack of filter despite your growing flustered state. With her hands on his shoulders, she led Jack outside, returning by her lonesome a short while later. Sighing, she sat on the side of your bed. “Sorry ‘bout that, again.”
With a wave, you dismissed her concerns. “It made me laugh.” You could tell she was itching to say something, but couldn’t tell if it was rude or not. “Me and Arthur spoke last night. We… confessed some things to each other, and, well, you heard what I said. There’s… something between us.”
“I really am happy for you,” she smiled at you, taking your hand in hers. “You two are good for each other. Being close with someone, in this life, it ain’t easy. But that don’t mean it ain’t worth it. Treasure the moments you have together, and take time for you both. Be there for each other, but don’t be fully dependent on the other. Communicate, even if it’s hard. Lord knows I know that all too well.” An almost regretful look crossed her features, a tiny frown pulling at her lips, as if reminiscing over past mistakes between her and John. 
“And, if he breaks your heart, which I pray he never does, just know that there is a camp full of nasty outlaws that would do anything for you. Myself included,” she added, a playful look replacing the old one.
“Thank you, Abigail.” 
With a final squeeze of your hand, Abigail stood up, brushing out the creases in her skirt. “I’ll try my best to stop Jack from saying too much ‘bout the two of you. But, be ready for anything.” As she exited the tent, you could hear Jack loudly talking to someone about the conversation he just had with you. Groaning, you flopped your head back, praying that someone wasn’t Arthur. 
The rest of that first day was filled with rest broken up by people coming to visit you. Charles had come in about twenty minutes after Abigail, and the two of you had chatted for a good while, catching up on his and Arthur’s adventure to find you. He had also gifted you a small whittled version of your horse, the wood stained to match his black and white coat. You had accepted the gift with gratitude, setting it by your flowers after staring at it in your hands for a long while. 
Arthur had come back during Charle’s visit, freshly bathed and with new clothes on. His hair was still slightly damp as he stood awkwardly at the entrance, not wanting to barge in on your conversation. Gesturing him further inside, you then patted the bed behind you where he was before, moving further up so there was more space for him.
As he came over, he patted Charles on his shoulder, joining into the conversation with a few additions to the story as he slid into the bed behind you. You didn’t fully lay against him, not wanting to get too affectionate in front of your friend and making him uncomfortable. Charles only stayed a few minutes after that, giving you a light hug before leaving the two of you. 
Reclining fully against Arthur’s chest, you let out a pleased sigh as you felt him embrace you. “Y’know, I heard some crazy things from Jack not too long ago.” You felt him laugh as your head rolled back defeatedly, eyes closed. 
“He’s definitely Marston’s kid, that’s for sure. Nosy little…” you grumbled, and you felt him laugh again. 
“He’s not the only one. Mary-Beth and the girls nearly jumped me after they saw me leave. Barely made it down to the river in one piece.”
“How’d you survive?”
“John got ‘em off my back. Then, once the other’s were out of earshot, began hounding me with his own questions. I swear, the whole camp is a bunch of high society folks who got nothing to do but gossip all day.”
“Can’t fault them. It’s not everyday that the gang has a new couple in it.” You hadn’t meant for the term couple to slip out. You knew there was something between the two of you, but you feared putting a label on it. Slowly opening your eyes, you tried to gauge Arthur’s facial expression, but to no avail. You remembered Abigail’s words about communication, so you took the leap of faith. “We… Are we a couple? Are we… dating?” It felt juvenile to use the word dating, but you knew no other way to ask.
“Yes?” Arthur replied almost immediately, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 
Oh. You felt a little silly, and you closed your eyes again, avoiding Arthur’s confused glance. 
“Unless…” you could hear the panic and disappointment in his voice, and you immediately reopened your eyes, lifting out of his embrace to turn and face him fully.
“No, we are! It’s just, you… we never said that we were, like, official, and I didn’t want to put a label on it and make you uncomfortable and I really want to be yours but I don’t want to push you into somethin’ if you’re not ready for it and… what?” Your rambling was cut short by the fond yet amused look on Arthur’s face.
“I’m more than ready for this. Trust me. I want this. I want you.” 
“Okay,” you nodded, kissing him quickly, before laying back down on Arthur, this time facing his chest, your face burrowed in the crook of his neck. You felt his hand rub up and down your back, pressing kisses on the top of your head as you settled in. You were starting to feel sleepy, a mix of the food, tonic, and Arthur lulling you back to unconsciousness. 
“You smell good,” you mumbled, voiced half muffled by his neck.
“Do I meet your standards, princess?” 
“Y’always do, pretty boy.”
“Pretty boy?” Arthur scoffed lightly. 
“Very pretty. Prettiest boy I’ve ever met.”
You felt him shake his head, clearly not believing you, but you could feel his heart rate began to pick up. You didn’t have to look up to know he was blushing. 
“Go ahead and rest. You want me to send away visitors?”
“Only for an hour. Just gonna close my eyes for a bit. Promise me you’ll only let me sleep for a bit. 
“I promise,” was the last thing Arthur said to you before you fell asleep.
By the end of the day, your nightstand and the floor around it was filled with various trinkets and goods from the other gang members; Lenny had brought you your favorite candy; Javier had gotten you a new necklace that he totally hadn’t stolen; Mary-Beth bought you a new shirt, your previous destroyed beyond repair. It was at that point you remembered that your old boots and hat were still at the O’Driscoll’s camp.
To your surprise, even Micah had stopped in, albeit briefly, giving you a quick apology before leaving. You and Arthur had shared a good laugh at that after he was long gone.  As sick as you were at hearing the question “how are you doing”, it was nice to be cared for like this. 
Throughout the day, Arthur stayed by your side, leaving for only a few moments to relieve himself, grab something for you, or to confer with the others in camp. He would call on one of the girls in camp to help you when needed to relieve yourself. Dutch, bless him, didn’t call on Arthur once that day, giving both of you much needed rest. When you weren’t getting visitors or resting, you and Arthur chatted or cuddled in silence. 
Darkness had long since flooded your tent, the lantern hanging unlit in the center of your tent. Laying on your right side, Arthur lay behind you, arm strung across your waist, keeping you pulled close to him. As you closed your eyes, the warmth of the man behind you better than any blanket on the market, you realized there was no way you were ever going to be able to sleep alone again. 
You found yourself fine with that fact.
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allwaswell16 · 3 months
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A fic rec of angsty omegaverse One Direction fics as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fics, please leave the writers kudos and comments! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!
— Louis/Harry —
💔 Light, Spark and Fire (series) by green_feelings / @greenfeelings
(M, E, 239k, Louis/Harry, Zayn/Liam) Louis and Zayn run a music label, Liam is Britain’s up-and-coming pop star, Harry’s working on taking Louis’ walls down until he builds his own up, and Niall holds them all together without realising he does.
💔 Saving Symphony Hall by @helloamhere
(E, 124k, hurt/comfort) “That’s the attitude,” said Louis, “I’ll tell you tomorrow. Tonight, I need to do some research. Zayn, give me your number. I’m gonna save our symphony.”
💔 Strawberries & Cigarettes by dimpled_halo / @comebackassholes
(E, 76k, exes) Two stories, eleven years, and the two boys that never stopped loving each other.
💔 These High Walls by LarryAlways28
(E, 68k, musician Louis) Harry was raised exactly as a Styles heir should be: sharp as a tack, witty, charming, and powerful. He was the ideal son - until he presented as an Omega.
💔  Maybe You’ll Like the Way I Am by @lululawrence
(NR, 55k, accidental bonding) When Louis’ alpha neighbor asks him to pretend to be his omega for a week, Louis immediately says no.
💔 Your Gift is Wasted On Me by therogueskimo / @bravetemptation
(NR, 54k, neighbors) Omega Louis has severe touch deprivation and is averse to touch. But he’s fine. Really.
💔 Bear with me by 28sunflowers / @vintageumbroshirt​  
(E, 46k, omega/omega) But try as they might, the one fact that remains true is that children don’t save broken relationships. Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be.
💔 Wild Hearts Run Free by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom
(E, 42k, secrets) When fate and Mother Nature conspire to trap the two strangers together, will Harry’s worst fears be proven, or will Louis find a way to break down his walls and lead him into the light?
💔 Canyon Moon by delsicle / @eeveedel
(E, 40k, Lion King au) For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.
💔 Follow Your Arrow by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13
(T, 36k, canon) They said Louis playing alpha wouldn’t affect anything. It was the best thing for the band, so he doesn’t really regret it except deep in the dead of night, when he bites down on his knuckles to swap the echoing ache of depri for a sting of pain.
💔 Too Young To Know by @2tiedships2
(M, 35k, exes to lovers) the one where Harry doesn’t present as an alpha… until he does.
💔 Compass to my Soul by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup
(T, 31k, canon) Louis Tomlinson, omega, is 1/5 of world famous boy band One Direction. He spends his time hoping his bandmates don’t notice him.
💔 where the lights are beautiful by twoshipsdrifting / @polkadotlou
(E, 31k, accidental bonding) If that had been his life, his goal, Louis would feel pretty good about himself now. As it is…Louis feels like shit.
💔  Sisterwives by @jaerie 
(E, 32k, omega/omega) Louis thinks he's getting everything he's ever dreamed of. Harry helps him find what makes him truly happy.
💔 Compete Against the Stars by amomentoflove / @daggerandrose
(M, 30k, uni) An A/B/O au where Louis finds out he's claimed to another Alpha. Angst ensues.
💔 The Risen (series) by @creamcoffeelou
(E, 28k, cult au) In search of the next breaking story, Harry goes off to do something no one else has been able to do: get the scoop on Louis Tomlinson and his devoted group of followers.
💔  tread lightly on my ground by fairytalelights / @lookslikefairytale
(E, 20k, mpreg) the one where Harry is having Louis’ baby, but Louis doesn’t know it’s his
💔  Keep Me Closer by zanni_scaramouche / @zanniscaramouche
(T, 18k, uni) Louis expects Harry to react poorly, maybe even file a formal complaint and that’s gonna suck ass but Louis won’t say shit cause he knows he deserves it, so he prepares an apology before Harry’s even turned around.
💔 No Easy Love (Could Make Me Feel This Way) by @allwaswell16
(E, 17k, exes) an Alpha Louis/Alpha Harry au where they get a second chance to make things right with the love of their life.
💔 With love comes strange currencies by mediaville
(E, 16k, canon) They're Accidentally Mated and Dealing With It Rather Badly.
💔 Him & I by @notasawrap
(NR, 8k, mpreg) Louis thinks Harry has a lover and he's willing to let's Harry go to be happy with someone else even if it hurts the three of them.
💔 A Silver Lining In A Storm (You Were Lightning, I Was Born) by @fallinglikethis
(E, 6k, arranged marriage) Omega Prince Harry had always known that he was going to have an arranged marriage. But after the death of his first fiancé, a man who turned out far worse than Harry thought possible, his subsequent marriage to the man's brother leaves Harry finding it difficult to trust that everything will work out.
💔 lucky once, could be lucky again by @jaerie
(E, 2k, famous/not famous) Louis has been letting the rich and famous knot him for cash since he found himself walking out on the lavish lifestyle of his rockstar future mate.
— Rare Pairs —
💔 Pride by iwanttowriteyouafic
(E, 86k, Zayn/Liam)  the one where Zayn and Liam strike a deal to help each other through their dirtiest nights, but Zayn's perception of alphas may be preventing him from something purer
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gz-missfit · 6 months
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So with Phil ending stream and that event dying down I wanna talk about him.
And especially with how good of a decision it was from Cellbit to make him a fellow head of ther order.
Let me explain
So I'm gonna try and string this along but the basis I'm building on is that Phil is a center. Not just figuratively but also literally! Remember before the Favela and Spawn become the meeting places? Yeah his home was the point people would meet at, his doors were always open and his waystone was the one ingrained in people's muscle memory when a meeting or communal location was mentioned.
But Phil's also been a communicative center, he's a loner usually, mostly getting dragged along by tubbo or fit for some events.
But he's reliable! And people know this about him. They hear how a single father of 2 has carried the life of these 2 kids in his own, they've heard how Tallulah and Chayanne are the best behaved eggs due to him, they see him casual help people out etc. Phil's known for kindness and help when needed but people who don't know him don't realize there's so much more to him! Fit and Tubbo for example are the first 2 who are aware of this. Fit trusting Phil with literally everything because he knows how capable he is and Tubbo knowing Phil's capabilities in a way where he respects him heavily. And I don't even need to mention how Etoiles is aware of Phil's combat abilities.
Now why did I say that he was the perfect addition as a head of the order? Because he proved today that he is behind everything the order is about. He is a much needed cog in its machine, he's not a head investigator or strategist but he's someone they need to allow this.
Baghera wanted to investigate? Phil stopped trying to look around, focused on helping her clear mobs, gave her all his paper and kept an eye on her while calling to her to make sure she could collect evident when her inventory got filled. He's ready to put his own curiosity and knowledge aside to let others thrive.
Pierre needed a fighter when mobs swarmed him? Phil stood between him and the mobs, being a calm voice amongst panic, standing in Etoiles footsteps as protector and filling them well.
Roier wanted to stay and risk his life because he wanted more information? Phil will stay too, he's not leaving anyone behind even if it could cost his own life and he'd do it again.
Forever is acting weird and trying to brush worries off? Then Phil will worry even more and make sure he knows that Phil's someone who will be there whenever he's needed.
There's so many moments like this, Phil putting himself aside to let others thrive, becoming a support fighter for Etoiles, a teacher for tallulah, an investigator for Cellbit.
He's someone that island needs without them realizing it because he's a quiet constant hum but important! Like a humming of well working machines in a busy factory. Or the humming of bees in a thriving garden full of animals. He's quiet and not always noticeable but he's proof that things are working and okay, the backbone of it.
This is why this trust of Cellbit in him to call him a head of the order is so important for me, and especially Phil promising loyalty and trust to Cellbit cause it may sound basic but those who don't know Phil don't know how much Phil's loyalty truly means. How much his promise of it is an honor to someone because Phil's whole moral compass and trust is based on proof. If you can proof to Phil you're capable and put your money where your mouth is then he'll go through fire for you, and he's promised that to Cellbit, knowing fully well it's a promise he'll keep.
Phil's factual and logical, he's a grounding force when needed and someone who will fit himself into a role that needs to be filled. He's a support, a warrior, a investigator, a distraction etc. He's not focused on his own goals even if it hurts him to put those aside, if he sees potential in supporting or letting someone lead he'll do just that. He's so fucking observant and it's such an important trait not many islanders have to the same level he does. He watches with protective eyes and sees things most people don't. Ironically enough you can see this in his photographs a lot! He's a watcher an observer and acts based on what he sees.
Basically today, that little bit where they went into the new office where forever was taken, was proof of what Phil is needed for. He's not required, he knows that much, but he's important for the community of that island. He's important for letting others thrive. He's what the head of the order is, what they represent. Trust in eachother and letting people thrive in what they're good at while helping them in any way he can.
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lightcee · 2 months
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Sasuke couldn't exactly describe it.
Sakura's scent. It was a bit musky, and it was warm and comforting—if you could even use that to describe a scent.
It's been a few months since they started traveling together, and it's a scent he's now very accustomed to. Although it wasn't something new to him either.
It brings back memories of when they were genin and doing missions together. When they were younger, Sakura usually smelled like lavender or strawberry or whichever perfume or shampoo she had used then, but he remembers this particular scent during key moments.
It was the scent he smelled when he woke up after his fight with Haku. It was what comforted him when Orochimaru first gave him the curse seal, and what stopped him when the curse seal first took over him. It was what welcomed him in that hospital after he encountered Itachi again.
It was simply Sakura. That was the best description he can give the scent.
And it was what flooded his senses now that Sakura had pinned him down the ground, for probably the third time since they started their spar this evening.
He had definitely been distracted. And he wasn't even surprised that he was, anymore. Her scent was intoxicating whenever she got this near to him. It makes his mind go blank.
Sakura pants on top of him, pinning him down with her thighs, hands glowing with chakra scalpels, a small grin visible on her mouth. And Sasuke couldn't help but focus on that.
Her lips.
Pink and delicate like cherry petals. He wondered if they were as soft as their namesake.
He wanted to feel them against his own.
Sasuke inhaled steadily, forcing his eyes away from her lips and, meet her jade eyes.
They sparkled in the moonlight, in them he saw anticipation.
And he belatedly realized. She knew what he was just thinking.
That shouldn't be a surprise, at this point. She'd always known what he was thinking.
And she wanted it, too.
She wanted him to kiss her.
He swallowed and Sakura sucked in a breath, her teeth dug into her lower lip slightly
And he was even more tempted to bite that lip, himself.
“It’s been quite a few months,” he said, quietly, distractedly.
Sakura nodded and shifted so she wasn't putting too much weight on him.
He felt his brows pull together. “I’ve had… much time to think.” He said, still distracted by everything that she was doing, her pink hair illuminated by the moon, looking like a halo on top of her head.
“Me too,” she said, as the chakra scalpel disappears.
Clearly, their little spar has ended prematurely, and neither of them seem to care.
Releasing his hand from under her, he closed it in a fist, anxious. Never in his life had he felt so afraid. “I am… I really admire you, Sakura.”
Sakura smiled at him, then her eyes flitted bashfully to her side — cheeks flushing. She said, still grinning, “Then why won’t you just kiss me already?”
Sasuke nearly choked, staggered by the charming irreverence he still hadn’t quite grown accustomed to—not after all this time. Not after everything he has done, every mistake he had made, every pain he had caused her.
“Because I'm scared,” he finally confessed. “I feel like after everything that happened, after everything I did,” he forced the next words out, “you'll doubt my feelings for you.”
He feared she would assume he simply settled for her. That she'd misunderstand him, and think he only wanted her to restore his clan, that he would be incapable of caring for her with the depth and compassion she'd had harbored for him all these years.
When he met her stare again, he was surprised to find her beaming, no traces of concern on her face. “You have feelings for me?”
Sasuke snorted, a dark brow lifted. “That’s all you got from what I said?”
The bridge of her nose crinkled as she lifted a hand to cup his right cheek. He shuddered beneath her touch.
“I know all of you, Sasuke-kun” Sakura said quietly. She raised her other hand to cradle the left side of his face. “Even more so, after we've reacquainted. You haven't changed, not really. And I am not afraid of you. I've never been.”
And then, gently but with intent, Sakura leaned down to Sasuke's face, slanting her lips over his. He made a low sound in the back of his throat and deepened the kiss, his hand coming up to hold Sakura's head closer to his.
He never thought kissing her would feel this way.
It felt like... like coming home.
It felt like he was finally where he should be.
When they parted, Sasuke didn't let Sakura move away. And for a moment, as they catch up on their breath, they simply looked at each other's eyes, their foreheads touching, with Sakura still on top of him.
Neither cared about that, either. They were alone in the forest anyway, with only the moon witnessing their first kiss.
And Sasuke realized, he wasn't quite satisfied yet.
"...Again?" He asks quietly.
And Sakura lets out a little giggle, but obliged anyway, reaching for his lips once more.
This time, Sasuke pulled her down so she was completely laying on him. And for quiet a while, neither talked.
END
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sparkypantaloons · 2 years
Text
It Must Be
Bruce remembers the first time each of his kids told him they loved him.
The first time Dick says the words, Bruce almost doesn't catch them.
The eleven year old is near exhaustion, limbs shaking and breath heaving as he struggles to pull Batman out of the surf. He's soaked, his cape sopping wet and clinging to his tiny frame. There's sand all over his face, too. All over his knees and arms, in his hair and on his gloves.
His feet stumble, as the swell finally helps him pull Batman's sodden form onto the shore. Then he collapses to his knees. Throws himself onto Bruce's chest, and tries to catch his breath through his sobs.
"Don't die, don't die, don't die. Please B, don't leave me. I love you, B, please don't leave, please don't leave me."
Bruce's hands are still tightly bound together, his head feels like someone took a chainsaw to it and he's pretty sure he's swallowed half of the Bay. But those three little words, barely audible over the tide and the wind and Dick's desperate sobs, change everything.
It's the first time Bruce has heard them in years. Decades, even. Not since his parents had... well...
And it's not that Alfred doesn't feel that way about him. Or that Bruce doesn't know it. But Alfred was a man of a different generation, had brought Bruce up the same. Words like that... they were thought, not said.
Hearing them from Dick, even in such bleak circumstances, it lights a flame in Bruce. Just a small one, flickering and fluttering, where before there had only been darkness.
~
The first time Bruce hears it from Jason, is in the summer. It's Jason's first birthday at the Manor and there are balloons and cake and music. The twelve year old has received cards from Diana and Clark and Dick, from Commissioner Gordon and Dr. Thompkins. Alfred has bought him his own cooking apron and hand made little step, so Jason can reach the stove properly, and Bruce has brought him a bike.
The three of them sit in the sunshine for lunch, Jason's eyes shining brighter with every card and gift and well wish he receives. Like he didn't even realise so many people knew he existed, let alone cared about his birthday.
When Bruce tucks him into bed that night, Jason flings his arms around Bruce's neck. Buries his head into the older man's shoulder and says "This was the best birthday ever, Bruce."
Bruce laughs and says "I'm glad, Jay. What was your favourite present?"
Jason pulls back and smiles, a little shy. "It was you, B." Then he presses a sloppy kiss to Bruce's cheek before settling down under the covers.
"Goodnight, Jason." Bruce says, turning out the light.
"G'night B, love you."
Bruce doesn't stop smiling for the rest of the week. The flame inside a little campfire now, and Alfred, Dick, Jason and Bruce sit around it, toasting marshmallows.
~
Bruce tries not to think about the words once Jason... once Jason dies. It's too much to bear. His darling boy. Once so full of compassion and joy and warmth, lies cold and still in the ground. Most days it's all Bruce can do not to join him, though he flirts ever closer to the idea.
Then Tim comes along. Tim who is whipsmart and driven and oh so stubborn. Always willing to put himself on the line. To do whatever it takes. To be better, to do better, to help.
Tim steps up to help Bruce, help a total stranger, regardless of the cost to himself. He brings Dick back home, helps Bruce fix old hurts with his first son. And yes, Tim's a little weird, but he's there. Always, when Bruce needs him.
Bruce had needed Tim that night. That night, when for no reason at all, Bruce was being reckless. Dangerous. Pushing himself to the brink and why? Because someone had mentioned his parents on the radio? Some song had reminded him of Jason?
No, nothing so sad as that. Bruce had asked if Tim would like to be adopted, and Tim had said no. He had his reasons. Good reasons. Reasons that Bruce understood, agreed with even. But somehow it still hurt like he had lost another son. And when he'd taken to the rooftops that night, he fought as though he had too.
Three broken ribs and a fractured tibia later, Tim had dragged him back to the Cave, furious.
"I thought we were past this, Bruce!"
Bruce doesn't answer.
"Seriously?" Tim snaps. "Nothing?" He begins pacing. "I can't keep doing this Bruce. I can't... I can't do it. I won't."
"It's fine." Bruce grimaces.
"It's not fine!" Tim voice breaks on the words. Tears of frustration shining in his eyes. "You can't keep putting yourself in harms way, tormenting the people who love you. Dick, Alfred, me. It's not fair."
"You?" Bruce had mumbled, half high on the painkillers Tim had given him no choice in.
"Yes, me!" Tim snaps again, wiping at his eyes. "Damn it Bruce, how many years have I been doing this. Tried to stop you from destroying yourself? I can't... I can't keep doing this. It's not just you he needs me out there Bruce. I need you too."
Bruce is silent again.
Tim sighs. "I love you, Bruce. We all love you. You have to stop this."
And even though Bruce has kept Tim at a distance, deliberately so, somehow, the kid has still pulled him back from the brink. Saved that sputtering flame inside of him from disappearing again.
~
It takes Bruce longer than he's proud of to make Cass officially part of their family. She's almost an adult, really, but it's something she needs. The security of a family, the stability of a father. She's something Bruce needs too.
He's seen the way she's tortured herself for what Cain made her. He sees it when he looks in the mirror as well. When he questions what Gotham has made him. What Gotham has cost him...
Cass doesn't deserve the life he's lived, and he's determined to do better for her, where he can no longer do better for himself.
When she moves into the Manor, he suggest a movie night just the two of them. Needs to show her she isn't just here because she's Batgirl, but because she's Cass.
They watch Jurassic Park. Sink into the giant couch in the den, leaning against each other and eating popcorn. When the t-rex comes she jumps excitedly in her seat and when the velociratpors chase the children through the kitchen she pretends to cover Bruce's eyes so he doesn't scared.
When the film is over, they head out on patrol together. It's an easy night, warm and dry but little sign of trouble. They swing from roof top to roof top and glide between buildings. Move seamlessly together as if they'd been doing it their whole lives.
When the sun begins to crest on the horizon around five thirty, they shed their uniforms for civvies, and watch it rise from Wayne Tower. As father and daughter. As Wayne's.
I've never had this before. Cass signs.
"A sunrise?" Bruce asks.
A father. She replies.
"Hn." Bruce chuckles. "How is going?"
Perfect. She signs. "Love it." She says. "Love you."
She presses a kiss to Bruce's cheek and the fire inside of him burns warm as the summer sun.
~
Damian never expected love. Never considered it even. He was raised with a mission, a purpose. That was the goal and everything else was superfluous.
Bruce can't take credit for teaching him otherwise. It's Dick who did the hard work. Who broke the icey exterior and protective walls, this fierce little nine year old had created. Had shown him that life wasn't meant to be about Batman's cause, or Robin's title, or inheriting the Demon's Head. But that it was about love. About family.
Even so, as well as Damian had learned Dick's lesson, he was still his father's son. Words of affection came as easy to him as they did to Bruce, which is to say, not at all.
So Bruce never expected, hadn't with any of his children, but would never from Damian, to hear those words.
And then Scarecrow had reared his ugly head, and his fear toxin had brought out the very worst of Damian's upbringing. Every awful trial he had faced with the League, mangled together with Bruce's death, and Dick's amnesia, Jon's age change and Damian's own murder at the hands of the Heretic. Until Damian was sobbing in Bruce's arms, begging Bruce not to abandon him.
"Damian, listen to me." Bruce had said, his hands cupping Damian's face. "I will never make you leave, never."
"Please Father, please." Damian had sobbed, had begged into Bruce's chest. "I love you so much. Please don't make me leave. I beg you, please. I'll make you proud, I swear it."
Bruce had wondered if Damian could feel the fire that burned for him, deep inside Bruce's chest. Wondered it if had kept him warm, as Bruce had held him on the Cave floor, and waited for the storm to pass.
~
It's Bruce's birthday, so Alfred usually lets him sleep past twelve.
Ace however, does not. Too smart for her own good, she's long since worked out how to open his bedroom door. She bounds in around eleven am, and leaps onto the bed. Wakes him with sloppy kisses and a wet nose.
"Easy, girl. Easy." Bruce's voice is deep and dry with sleep, his eyelids heavy. But Ace is insistent, relentless even, despite her age.
"Is he up yet, Acey?"
Ace barks happily, and Bruce winces at the volume. Jason is stood in the doorway.
"Come on old man." He says. "Your dog needs a walk."
Bruce blinks blearily, is sure Jason must be a hallucination or a mirage or something.
"We'll go without you if you don't hurry up." Jason huffs slightly, and Bruce stumbles from bed, pulls on his sweats.
The sun is already high in the sky and for spring it's already pleasantly warm. Jason and Bruce walk through the grounds of the Manor in companionable silence. Ace racing ahead of them for the ball Jason throws.
"So how are you?" Bruce says eventually. The sun is warm on his face. It's been a few weeks since he's seen Jason out of uniform. It feels good to see him in the day.
"I'm good." Jason says softly. "Really good, actually."
"Yeah?" Bruce asks.
Jason smiles. "Yeah." He pauses. "How about you?"
Bruce shrugs. "Ah you know. Same old, same old."
Jason grins, the kind he used to do when he was Robin. "Same old?" He asks, eyebrow raised. "Aren't you a new old today?"
Bruce opens his mouth to speak, but they round the corner of the Manor, onto the terrace and his words fail him.
There are balloons and cake and music. His entire family gathered round a table of cards and gifts and pictures. They cheer when they see him and Steph, Duke and Tim lead an awful rendition of Happy Birthday.
Jason bumps his shoulder. "I erm... I didn't get you a present." He says sheepishly. "But I did organise this." He gestures vaguely at his siblings.
Bruce's heart is full of fire. He grins. "It's perfect, Jay. Thank you." He pulls the younger man into a hug.
"Happy birthday, B." Jason mumbles. "Love you."
"I love you, too."
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hotteoki · 8 months
Text
pirate king (j.y.h)
Tumblr media
pairing: pirate jeong yunho x fem reader
genre: strangers to lovers, alternate dimension, pirate au
wc: 4k
cw: mild language, weaponry
notes: i wrote this with the layout of the ateez ship in mind (the one in the 'illusion' mv but with blond yunho cause he 4+4 the halloween ver of deja vu
xtra - tysm @woosluv & @ssaboala for beta reading for me! <33
"all eyes on me now! if you still doubt mine, it's too pointless. we're still young and wild, we gonna find new world to be mine!" yunho's fingers moved along the quote carved into the compass he's had since who knows how long.
yunho's head was lifted up forcefully by hongjoong's pointing stick poking his forehead. "you're going to get lost later on the island if you don't listen to me right now," hongjoong tilted his head, stepping back to the blackboard. "captain, i mean this in the nicest way possible, we've been over this, like, six times in the span of a week. we'll be fine," yeosang called from across the room as he tapped his telescope against his other palm, still dodging wooyoung's outstretched arms every now and then.
"you all say this but i know one of you is going to get into some shit and i'm going to have to be the one to clean it up," hongjoong sighed, dropping his pointer onto the ground lazily, "okay, come on, let's get off the ship. remember the plan, and wooyoung, stop trying to kiss yeosang's face. you can do that when we come back."
yunho kicked the ladder down onto the dock, stepping off the ship first. the crew split up, him going into the left path trailing into the cave. they all knew exactly what they were looking for, and the lengths each and every one of them were willing to take to get it.
it was peaceful until a rustle attracted his attention. yunho paused, pretending to re-lace his shoes, his eyes darting to his left, the direction where the sound had come from. when it was calm for the following minute, yunho slowly stood to continue his journey, putting on an oblivious façade, his hand subtly inching for his sheathed cutlass with every step.
yunho wasn't stupid. he's had enough experience to know not to doubt his senses at any cost. true to him, the snapping of a branch immediately heightened his senses. he swiftly cut through the thick, tall grass, eyes meeting with ones belonging to an innocent doe.
as the doe ran off, yunho only noted then how it was running along the path he was on. the cogs in his head whirred in confusion as he wondered why a deer wouldn't run away from a potential predator, rather in the same direction as him. that thought never escaped as he trudged on, praying the cave he was walking towards would appear before him faster.
and lo and behold, there it was.
if yunho hadn't been looking for it specifically he would've missed it entirely. it blended in perfectly with the shadows of the swaying trees, outgrown weeds guarding the entrance, vines crawling around, all leading straight into the depths of the cave.
peeking into the darkness, he checked every corner, sharp eyes darting here and there. finally, they landed on an unusual glimmering spot. yunho stepped closer, cautious of the fact he was now exposed to any potential predators hiding deep in the cave.
he was about a meter away from the shining rock when he realised it wasn’t a rock at all. it was an hourglass etched into the cave walls, almost like the cave was built around it over the years. he breathed out a light sigh of relief upon feeling the grooves of the rock nearby. it wasn’t etched in that deep. he could easily pull it out with a bit of help.
he allowed himself a few more minutes of admiring the hourglass. the cromer, its name was. an hourglass with the ability to lead them to an alternate dimension, where they could escape this timeline that caused each and every one of them so much pain and loss.
after stealing books from other pirates, following leads from old legends, tracking down their ancestors' footsteps, seonghwa had finally found a map hidden deep in the journals of an unknown pirate, their initials and writings long faded within the centuries. the joy the crew had felt when they located the hourglass after years was a night yunho could not forget.
just as he was about to turn back and find his crewmates, yunho was greeted with the sight of the very doe blocking his exit. when it was made clear that the doe had no intentions of moving at all, yunho unsheathed his cutlass. this was no ordinary animal.
his theory was proved right when a gust of wind blew against his face. removing his hand from his face and opening his eyes, he tried to conceal his shock. where the doe had stood before was a girl about his age.
“you’re a shapeshifter.” you raised your eyebrows at his statement, “obviously.” “i thought they didn’t exist anymore after hunters hunted them down ages ago,” yunho still had his cutlass held in front of him, wary of this new stranger. “yeah, i know. that was centuries ago. there’re still a few of us left, but most of us don’t want to be found.” “you’re not one of them, though,” yunho pointed out.
“and with good reason,” you stepped closer as yunho stepped back. sighing, you held up your hands in surrender, “do i look like i’m going to attack you or something?” “you can never be too careful,” he shrugged.
“i’ll tell you an easier way of getting that hourglass without taking this cave down.” yunho’s arm faltered, “what do you mean?” “this entire island relies on the life within the roots, the air, the animals, you know, all that shit. you break this cave the entire island goes down with it. you and your crew would never make it out alive.”
he swallowed. he wasn’t sure if you could be trusted. shapeshifters were known to be tricksters, always up to no good. what if you were playing with him and he could’ve saved precious time taking the hourglass instead of talking to you? after meeting your impatient eyes, he finally decided to play it safe.
“what do you want in return?” “get me off this island,” you replied instantly. the lack of hesitation in your voice made yunho believe you’ve had thought about this for a long, long time. he sucked in a breath through his gritted teeth. the crew couldn’t just find an extra person for charity. they were already rationing their supplies amongst themselves, adding another person might as well be a goodbye to their albeit uncomfortable but familiar living.
“take me with you or no hourglass. your choice,” you crossed your arms, tone firm. yunho swallowed again, putting his cutlass away and rubbing a hand on his face, “you’ll have to talk to the captain.” “fine, then take me to him.” “you can’t just-” yunho wanted to scream. despite being a pirate since birth, he’d never experienced a situation like this, and he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do.
“you know what? fine, let’s go find him,” yunho pursed his lips. he knew for a fact hongjoong would never agree, but how else were they supposed to get the hourglass? it wasn’t like they could just bow their heads and march back onto the ship and off.
reminding himself of the crudely drawn map in their meeting room, yunho walked for what felt like hours with the intensity of your glare burning the back of his head. he thought he could drop onto his knees and thank the heavens the second he saw the familiar back of hongjoong.
hongjoong darted up at the sound of foreign footsteps, swinging his pistol at your face out of instinct. “she wants to speak to you,” yunho deadpanned, annoyed at the situation he was currently in. hongjoong lowered his pistol slightly, aiming at your chest now, “what do you want?” “i’ll talk when you get this pistol out of my face,” you frowned.
“i’m the one with the upper hand here, you really shouldn’t be making demands.” “considering i’m one of the remaining residents of this island who knows what you’re looking for and how to get it without dying, i don’t think you are.” hongjoong made a face, “and how do i know you’re telling the truth?” “you pirates. always so nervous about everything you see,” you paused, “i want to get off this island, you can help with that, and in return i’ll give you the hourglass.”
yunho looked for a reaction from hongjoong. when he was met with none, yunho was almost disappointed over the fact that his captain was considering his answer. “okay then,” hongjoong put his pistol away, “lead the way.” yunho felt his cheeks flushing at your cheeky smile. sure, he disliked you and your cocky attitude, but he wasn’t blind. anyone could tell you were gorgeous.
“i told you guys one of you was going to get into some shit. now look who’s cleaning it up?”
≡☆
it took a while for the entire crew to be gathered in the tiny cave the cromer rested in, all squished together to get a look at the hourglass while poor mingi stood on his tiptoes at the mouth of the cave. yunho watched in awe as you lifted your hands up, determined to keep his eyes open, only to be slapped with another aggressive gust of wind blowing in his face again.
he blinked cautiously, not realising his eyes had shut involuntarily. yunho vaguely felt his breath hitching at the infamous hourglass held in your hands. the gentle glow of each individual grain amongst the heaps of sand shimmered, tugging on his attention, while contrasting with the simple and plain metal supporting the phials.
“so?” you shifted your weight, waiting for something to happen.
and something happened indeed.
one look from hongjoong was all the crew needed as san shoved you to the ground, with seonghwa snatching the cromer from your grip and tossing it to jongho, the rest sprinting back to their ship. yunho followed his crewmates swiftly, but not before throwing his head back and yelling a quick “sorry!”
in his defense, he was sorry. just not sorry enough to feel guilty about it.
he nearly crashed straight into wooyoung’s back as he skidded to a sudden halt, confused as to why they stopped. sitting on the edge of the ship, legs swinging with an unamused expression, was you. but how…
“you really think you can outrun a doe? how self-centered.” hongjoong stared right back at you, irritated, “you can’t come with us.” “then i’ll take that back.” “i’d like to see you try,” he retorted, pistol now in hand again, “you can outrun me but can you outrun a bullet aiming straight for your head?” you huffed, “i’m not asking you to adopt me or anything, i just need you to drop me off at the nearest island.”
“bullshit. you’re saying you want to go from one island to another?” jongho scoffed from beside wooyoung. “i can’t leave this place without company. please just-” you sighed, and yunho could tell you felt defeated, “please just take me with you.” if he didn’t feel guilty enough, he definitely felt bad now. “cap, maybe we should take her.”
hongjoong gave him an odd look, clearly bewildered, “you were the one who insisted on leaving her.” “yeah well, i kinda feel bad for her now. she’ll stay with us for a few days maximum then we’ll just drop her off somewhere,” yunho briefly glanced at you, lowering his voice now, “i mean, maybe she really can’t leave. what, are we just going to dump her here?”
“i say we make her a deal,” yeosang chimed in, “she can live with us until we locate a nearby island, but if we arrive and it ends up being a bad one, she can’t argue and climb back aboard.” hongjoong nodded approvingly, “yeah, that sounds good.”
yunho watched as your face lit up when he repeated their deal to you. he silently swore to himself to always bring happiness to you during your stay if it meant he could catch a glimpse of your endearing smile again.
≡☆
yunho had volunteered to wrap up the cut on your arm you earned from san’s shove, despite seonghwa usually being the one to tend to the crew’s injuries. he led you down the stairs and to the medical room (which, really, was just their meeting room with a medical kit placed on the table), kicking away scraps of used bandages to the corner, praying you didn’t see them.
as he sat you down opposite him and began prepping the bandages, he began to wonder about you. where were your parents? how did you manage to come onto the island? why did you not have friends? what-
“you look like you have questions.” his gaze snapped up from your arm to your eyes, “no i- well, yeah, kind of.” you laughed lightly, “it’s okay, i get it. i’d be confused too.” yunho hoped you took the redness tainting his cheeks as embarrassment from being caught rather than his giddiness from your laugh. he motioned for you as he got started on wrapping your arm.
“i used to live on a different island, where my parents were. i met this guy, chan, and after being friends with him for a year or so, he offered to take me on a trip with his seven friends. i agreed. i honestly don’t know why i did. it was a spur of the moment thing. i followed him to the docks, where his ship was. turns out he’s a pirate and he’s the captain, much like your crew, actually.
“they said they wanted to go find some ‘treasures’, i just assumed they were joking around. they said they wanted to find an hourglass, i think one of the crew, hyunbin or whatever, said it belonged to his father. i remembered having heard some legends about it, and offered to lead the way. we searched for months, and finally found it on this island.
“when we arrived, they began arguing over who got to have it; they all had a different timeline in mind. someone wanted to go find their dead parents, someone wanted to rescue their girlfriend, it was- it was a lot,” you closed your eyes, throwing your head back, “we weren’t even from this timeline, for fuck’s sake! they fucked with the cromer as soon as they got their grubby hands on it, knowing damn well it was a full moon! i don’t even know what happened, to be honest, either that, or i can’t remember. it doesn’t matter. i don’t want to anyway.
“i think it’s something to do with the stupid hourglass. my theory is it passes down ownership to whomever it deems worthy to hold it, eliminating the past owners. that’s how i ended up alone. i tell myself they each left one by one, but it still bothers me how cursed magic like that exists. i don’t know, the whole thing’s really messed up. i guess being the holder gives you power to hide or expose it to others, because, well, as you saw, i could play around with its surroundings.” yunho hummed, taking in all the information.
he tightened the knot on your bandage, breathing out through his nose and rocking on his chair, “well, now that i know a lot about you, ask me anything you want.” “anything?” you lifted your head up again, eyes wide. yunho smiled, “yeah.” you leaned forward, head resting against your palms, “how are you so cute?”
yunho began spluttering, rocking a bit too far back on his chair, nearly falling over until you grabbed his hand, laughing at his reaction. as soon as he steadied himself, he yanked his hand away, feeling like his entire skin was on fire. you had a proud grin on your face, “i’m playing with you. though, really, you are cute.” he was genuinely convinced right then and there that you were the human form of heaven itself with the way his heart was palpitating.
the only dilemma yunho was having with himself was the fact that you couldn’t stay with them.
he liked to think that you shared the same thought as him.
≡☆
somehow, hours later, yunho found himself next to you on the beach, admiring the sunset from afar. “i haven’t had company in ages,” you commented, “it’s nice. especially since it’s you.” yunho had really wanted to kick his feet and giggle over your bold words, but he opted for a light chuckle.
“do you ever miss your old timeline? or dimension, or however you say it,” he regretted his words instantly at the sad look on your face. “all the time. i had a boyfriend, you know? he tried to stop me from going. i ignored him out of spite because of the amount of arguments we got into before i left. they were mostly to do with chan, he never trusted him, and neither should i have.”
yunho ignored the new, strange sense of jealousy he was feeling, and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, “you wouldn’t have known.” you only gave a weak smile in response. “so tell me about your boyfriend.” you stiffened up slightly before relaxing again. if yunho wasn’t staring at you, he would’ve missed it entirely.
“well, he was the sweetest guy i’ve ever met. people compared him to a puppy all the time because of his energy,” you hesitated, “he had dyed blond-ish hair, a cute smile, a great sense of humour. he was tall, and was really popular. he always knew just how to cheer me up when i was down. he was considerate, caring, kind, he was everything.” yunho felt himself slowly getting upset. how could he ever compare to him? he sounded perfect.
“jealous?” you teased, nudging him. “not at all,” yunho rolled his eyes, playing with his compass again. he watched your eyes lower onto the very object, a soft look in them. “of course you still have it,” you murmured. “what?” yunho furrowed his brows. had he heard correctly? “it’s nothing.”
≡☆
nighttime rolled around and eventually all of them gathered around; yunho had found himself subconsciously scooting closer to you, landing himself a knowing look from mingi.
while your eyes connected with the flames yeosang started minutes ago, yunho couldn’t help but admire every inch of your carefully sculpted face. it was funny, wasn’t it? how he, at first, hated your overconfident demeanour, your demanding character, your addictive voice, your adorable laugh… huh. maybe he’d never hated you.
“so are you guys going to hide it now that you have to wait to use it?” you tilted your head curiously, and yunho wanted to choke a fistful of sand down his throat to contain the squeals that were threatening to bubble up with how absolutely beautiful you were. he shrugged, “most likely.” “the full moon’s in three days. where would you hiding it for three days?” “up san’s ass,” wooyoung laughed, before getting smacked by san.
yunho couldn’t bring himself to laugh at wooyoung’s immature joke. not when he now knew that he never had a chance with you to begin with.
but hearing your contagious laughter made him think of how lucky he was to have met you at all.
≡☆
“i know you, yunho, and i know you like her-” “like is an exaggeration.” seonghwa rolled his eyes, “just listen to me. she’s not going to be staying with us for long, and if you keep giving yourself a chance to get to know her, you’ll end up getting heartbroken.” “but isn’t that the point? maybe, when we use the cromer and get to a different dimension, maybe we can be together there…” he trailed off at how ridiculous he sounded. “that’s not how it works, and you know it,” seonghwa’s tone was now stern, almost to the point of telling yunho off.
“she clearly likes me too, can’t we at least enjoy the little amount of time we have together?” mingi tossed an arm around yunho from behind, “i say go for it.” “of course you’d say that,” seonghwa tsked, before continuing, “i’m asking you, as part of your crew, and your friend, to think this through.” “i am thinking this through!” yunho insisted, “i’d rather go through a heavy heartbreak than leave her with a bunch of ‘what if’s. i really do like her, seong-”
“no, you’re thinking this with your plan of finding her in a different timeline. yunho, you can’t do that. do you know how risky that is? ignoring the fact how we’ve only known her for a day too!” “of course i know,” he hissed, “but i don’t care how risky it is. i’m doing it.” “love at first sight, some might say,” mingi patted yunho’s shoulder. “oh, don’t get him started on love now,” seonghwa groaned. “love is a stretch, but i definitely find her interesting enough to want to be with her.” “just say you like her, yunho. everyone and their mothers can hear your giggles at night in your room,” hongjoong teased.
yunho’s face flushed, “i don’t giggle!” with that, he left the tiny crowd and stormed off to the meeting room. to his surprise, you were sitting at his regular seat, examining his compass. he left it there?
“so you want to be with me?” you raised an eyebrow, running a thumb over the quote the same way yunho does. “what- no?” yunho scoffed, taking a seat beside you. “i heard you guys. you get loud when you’re defensive. it’s okay, it’s cute.” yunho was at a loss for words. grasping for straws to change the topic, he gestured to the compass, “why did you say something like ‘i still have it’?”
you grew silent, and yunho thought you hadn’t heard him. he was about to repeat his question when you opened your mouth to answer, “i knew you, jeong yunho.” he flinched at the full name coming out of your mouth, “how…” “in my timeline. i knew you.”
you had the same stiff posture as you did on the beach, and yunho recalled what you were talking about during that time, “your boyfriend…” “yeah.” suddenly it all made sense. the dyed blond hair, the puppy personality, tall… yunho had heard every single one of them.
“we were together?” his voice was barely above a whisper. you nodded sadly, a bittersweet smile plastered, “i never got to say sorry for not believing you.” “well, at least i got an apology now,” he wrapped his hand around yours, the compass in between your interlocked fingers, and the cromer, your chance of a new happily ever after, placed on the table just centimetres away.
networks - @kflixnet k-labels kbookshelf neverendingdreams-net straykidsland @k-films
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marilynthornhilllover · 8 months
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When you call my name. Do you think i'll come running? {Part 1}
+watch my heart burn
Summary: lady dimitrescu kills your friends but you managed to get away unnoticed, what happens when you go to work for her to get revenge on behalf of your mother? Will fate stand on your side?or will you let feelings get inside?
Lady dimitrescu x maid fem reader
Warning: insomnia, grief,anxiety, fear, slow burn, blood, cut wound, clumsy, slight depression, heartbreak,confusion,bullying, fluff.
A/n: I'm sorry if this is a bit long i just got this idea when i woke up and had to do it😌the song choice fits the fic well, recomend listening👍. Hope you all enjoy my darlings🤗💞
Part 2
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You slammed your door as you sat with your knees against your chest hyperventilating. How could she do this to you. She knew what lady dimitrescu did and is capable of and yet she wishes to send you off to work for her just to get money and revenge. How heartless could your mother possibly be. You sobed as flashbacks of the night swept through your mind.
It was your friend avas birthday and you decided to go on a hunt in the woods for fun. See the nature, the beautiful things there and near. You, ava and your other 2 friends. And that's when the beast did her killings. Her long claws brutally killed ava and your friends but you got away without being seen. You were horrified, terrified.
You hated yourself after that. It was your stupid idea to go hunting. You could have went to other places for her birthday, but no you wanted to be adventurous. You got her killed, on her birthday too. ava was a good friend to you. She'll never be forgotten. When you got home you couldn't breath, you kept seeing their bodies.
Years passed and you got over it. You got therapy and you were good now. But when ever you remembered the pure lost souls that died that night, it broke your heart. But it wasn't your fault, no, never , it's not your fault that monster killed your friends, that's on her.
~
It was the morning of your departure and you were mid.
"You be safe now my love, my dear daughter y/n, be brave my love and remember our plans" your mother whispered in your ear before kissing your cheek.
You turned to the attendant. And softly smiled.
You got into the carriage and waved your mother goodbye. It was a long way from the village to the dimitrescu castle. Fear filled your body as you realized who's territory you were approaching. Who's house you'll be in. Who's rules you'll be following.
You breathe out a shaky breath as the lady turned around to announce your arrival. You nodded shyly, flashed her a soft smile and exited the carriage.
You were immediately met with lady dimitrescu's cold golden eyes. They show no love, no mercy no compassion. But there was a hint of something in them. Sadness? Pain? Tiredness? You didn't know but there was something under all that cover, over all thoses walls that she built up there was some pain, hurt, sorrow.
You immediately flicked your gaze to the ground and walked up to her slowly.
" good evening, lady dimitrescu" you spoke softly, hardly above a whisper. She placed her finger under your chin and averted your gaze to look into her eyes. You got lost in them for a moment. Was she the one who killed your friends? Can't be..... she's so, she looks so pure.
"I asked a question child, speak up" she growled letting your chin fall, removing her cold finger tip from your skin. You couldn't help but miss her touch for a split second. Reminding yourself who you were infront of. Reminding yourself who she is, what she is.
"I-l'm sorry m-my lady, I know you d-don't like to repeat yourself but I did not hear your last w-words" you spoke squeezing your eyes shut, hoping that she doesn't slice you to ribbons.
"Look up child, let me see thoses pretty eyes" she spoke softly. You immediately looked up at her, not wanting to anger her more incase this was a trap.
"I'm soft on newbies, if there are any slip ups, you'll be forgiven. But do not test my patience, my anger is it's own person" she firmly said finding peace and calmness in your eyes. She hummed as she took one last look at you before walking away.
"Elizabeth make sure our new member is welcomed and comfortable, and please do inform my dear daughters of our new maiden. I do not want them snacking on her for dinner" she spoke with a growl like chuckle. As if it's happened already but she didn't care but for you. She wanted no one to hurt you. You were valuable to her. A deal like no other.
The head maiden shows you around the castle, gives you background story on everything etc. She final makes her final stop, your bedroom. She opened the door and your jaw dropped. It was huge. You had a very big bed, almost as big as the bedroom and your own personal bathroom that was even bigger.
"Daniela what are you doing here" Elizabeth spoke firmly with a cocked eyebrow.
Daniela looked up from her book and glanced at you. Her smiled brighten as her eyes gleamed. She squealed as she rushed off the bed to hug you. Her cute and innocent act could have fooled anyone. Fooled you. But Elizabeth has been working here way to long to not see right through her deadly act.
" Daniela dimitrescu but can call me dani, oldest, and-" Elizabeth cut her off with the clearing of her throat. Danielle huffed and backed up.
" dont play what your not daniela. I will not take responsibility for your foolishness, remember you mothers words" she spoke seriously, eyes flashing angrily. Daniella 'ughed' rolled her eyes and disappeared into files.
Elizabeth turns to you and holds you by both arms.
" theses people aren't as dangerous as they look,you hear me. Just don't fall into their trap and DO NOT GET ON THEIR NERVES." She spoke.
"Lady dimitrescu is a very nice lady, especially I she finds you useful. And what she did with you outside she's never done with other maiden. Count yourself lucky cause she already likes you,but do not take it for granted. She doesn't slice anyone to ribbons unless they do a God forbidden thing. Stand your ground, don't look weak, it's yes mistress or yes my lady same goes for when your saying no. Stay away from her daughters unless she asks you to give them something which she wont because your new" she rambled rules and guides for you until she was completely out of breath.
She really cared for you. She's seen some fucked up shit go down in the castle and she's gonna look out for you.
" lastly, the lady always test every new maids loyalty and ability to follow instructions, always listen to what she says and read in-between the lines and pick your words and responds very wisely. Oh and always be up before 7:00, that's it, if I missed any you'll find them in your ground rules book" she kissed your cheek and proceeded to walk out.
" hey lizzy" you called out stoping her in her tracks, though she didn't turn around you can tell she was listening.
"Thank you" you said softly as you smiled. She turned around and flashed you a warm smile.
" of course. Your one of us now y/n. Even though you might not like the lady. You will follow her oders. There's a track if your the exercise type and there's a library. You'll always be working so no time to fool around." She said before closing the door.
You hummed and walked around the room. It was nice. You walked over to the bed where your maid uniform was laid neatly. And bedside it had a note.
- Welcome To House Dimitrescu, your shift starts at 9:30 AM ends at 10:35 pm for now. Any enquiries ask lady sepol, head maiden better known as Elizabeth.
You looked at the time and realized that you only had 20 minutes til you had to be one duty. You quickly got dress and went downstairs. The first thing on your list was doing the dishes then sweeping in the evening and tidying up in the night.
You entered the kitchen but a girl stopped you and pinned a fancy name tagg onto your uniform.
You smiled softly at her but she doesn't smile back, instead she gives you a disgusting look. What's that for you thought to yourself. But then you remembered Elizabeth's words. "Don't show weakness". you must have been so caught up in thought that you didn't even notice you had bumped into someone.
" sorry, I'm so s-" you tried to wip the water off her clothes but she slapped your hand away harshly.
" watch where your going newbie what are you blind? Are has the the salary amount gotten to your head bitch?" She spat glaring at you, before you can apologize again a voice speaks up behind her.
" Oh Leah give her a break. You were once new too" she spoke softly. The girl turned to glare at the woman huffing.
"Yeah but I wasn't this blind was i?" She spoke before walking off bumping into your shoulder harshly.
You sighed as you mouthed 'thank you' to the lady before moving to the sink to do your job.
" Sarah. Sarah mildow. Assistant head maiden" she spoke softly offering you her hand.
You smiled at her and shaked it.
"Y/n y/l/n" you said, she nodded and went back to stacking the wine.
"Don't come off as weak, my sweet girl. But don't fight back" she mumbled, winking at you when she looked up. You pressed your lips together and went back to washing.
"What are you doing?" Asked the same girl from earlier. You wondered if she was crazy... or maybe she's the blind one. Can't she just cut you some slack.
"Didn't you read the freaking ground rules? Only wash the dishes with stain dish soap remover, now your gonna have to wash all those over and now your gonna be late for your next shift But oh well not my problem" she laughed wickly and left.
You bit your lip and growned, now you'll have to re-wash 150 plates. You got to work and finished late. You quickly started doing your second shift for the day and it was around dinner time for the dimitrescu family. As you were sweeping the floor near the kitchen you hear lots of noise.
There's was shouting and yelling and it was loud. How could human beings shout so loud without their voice box being damaged or getting hoarseness But then it hit you. They weren't human.
You entered the dinning room area and quietly sweep the floors. The entire time lady dimitrescu had her eyes fixed on you. You could feel them pulling at you, heating your skin. You tried desperately to make yourself smaller.
" doing that isn't gonna make you disappear draga"she spoke loudly the table going quiet. Her daughters looked at her weirdly but soon realized she wasn't talking to them. Lady dimitrescu has never called a maiden that. Never ever. A couple maids who were picking up the left over foods were astonished. You didn't know what the word meant or what kind of people she says it to but all you knew you wanted to disappear.
"Come take this to the kitchen pet" she spoke firmly, watching as your shakily walked over to her avoiding her gaze. As you picked up the glass, your shaking hands caused it to drop and break. The girls began to laugh as tears welled in your eyes. Can't you do anything right. Lady dimitrescu wasn't angry though, she kept looking at you with curiosity and hope.
" Leah clean this up. As for you my dear get started on your other shift. " she spoke as she got up to leave the table. You were too scared to move. This lady dimitrescu noticed and chuckled. She gently placed her hands on your hips and moved you to the side so she can get up from her chair. Her hands on your waist felt magical.
She held you close as she whispered into your ear. The smell of strong rich people perfume and smoke over take your senses.
" That's already one slip up and it's only your first day,my love"
She removed her hands and walked away, her daughters vanished into a vast of flies. Leah pushed you which caused you to fall and cut your finger on the shareds of glass on the floor. She grabbed your jaw and forced you to look at her.
" i don't hate you y/n, but get your shit together because I don't want to clean up any more maiden blood" she said, letting go of you and walking away to go get the broom.
You finished your shifts and went to your room.
You took a cold shower and went to bed. Thankfully you weren't to late for bed. It's was only 11:08pm. You sighed as you set your alarm for tomorrow and closed your eyes. You twisted and turned no matter what you did you couldn't sleep. Maybe it's because of who's house you were sleeping in.
You sighed as you looked at the time.
12:15pm. You groaned. You really wanted to get some rest before getting for 5:00 tomorrow. You remember Elizabeth said that there's a library. Maybe if you read you'll eventually fall asleep, yeah.
You got up and threw on a thin comfy butterfly multi color robe and went to the library. As you entered your jaw dropped. It was amazing. It was definitely bigger than your room, and it had 4 floors filled with shelfs and books.
You smiled as you walked over to one of the isle. You couldn't find anything you like so you decided to move to a next one. As you came out you saw lady dimitrescu sitting on the couch with her hair undone, makeup off, comfy lace night gown and her reading glasses. Your eyes flicked down to her smooth legs. Her porcelain skin was glowing in the fire place light. It's rare anyone sees her like this.
Your eyes flicked down lower to her red toes and back up to the book she was reading. "Bows and arrows of a fool" it sounds interesting you think to yourself. You flicked your eyes higher to see lady dimitrescu looking at you over her glasses.
Fear builds in you as you quickly pull back and hide.
" I already saw you draga mea. Come out pet" she said sighing as she closed the book. You repeated the word shit over and over again and she shyly came around the corner and stood some distance away from her. You kept looking at the ground and fidgeting with your fingers.
" what difference does it make you look at me in secret but hide your pretty eyes from me in public child" she said changing her position in the chair. You heard how it creaked as it accommodates her weight.
Her eyes racked up your body. Fragile, valuable, fearful, shy there's so many words she can use to describe you just by looking at you.
"Come sit child" she spoke, her tone more soft and gentle. Although alcina was rough and cold on the outside on the inside she was just someone who didn't have a choice, someone who life beat up really bad, someone pure. You moved slowly to stand infront of her, still no eye contact was made.
She pulled you onto her lap and cradled you. Running her hand gently through your hair. You couldn't help but melt into her embrace. Her touch was soft and gentle despise her cold demeanor. She smelled like lavender and wine, with a hint of smoke.
You wrapped your arms around her neck and snuggled into her neck. She gently placed a kiss to your forehead and started rubbing shapes onto your thighs, whispering sweet nothings into your ear.
" couldn't sleep draga?" She asked lifting your chin so she can look at you. You looked so scared, so tried. It broke her heart slightly. After thousands of eyes of feeling no other emotion other than anger and rage, alcina actually felt sorryful. Yet she didn't quite know what for. But holding you made something in her heart break. Maybe it was the love ones she killed for you and didn't know.
If she knew you were the one who got away that night what would she do?. Would she even be holding you? Kissing your skin? Calling you draga.
"Why do you fear me, darling?" She asked truthfully. Why would someone fear her to their core but still wish to be her hand cloth. Money make people do stupid things all the time but working for her, even money wouldn't make someone do something so risky. Especially with the type of anger she holds.
So why does a sweet angel dove like you wish to be in her presence? It simply amazes her. You both got lost in each other's eyes for what seemed like eternity. On til something in you snapped. She killed your friends. But yet here you lay in her arms, fearless. As if nothing happened.
You wanted to ask her the question so bad, why did you do it? There were so many questions you wanted to ask her. Because if she was the brutal monster every one claims she is, why is she so pure?
" I'll take my leave now, my lady" you spoke quietly, removing yourself from her embrace. You were supposed to ask her permission to leave yet her anger is far from building. What spell does this girl have on me, alcina thought to herself. You slowly backed out of the room. Elizabeth's voice ringing in your ear.
" theses people are not as dangerous as they look you hear me?"
"Lady dimitrescu is a very nice lady, especially if she finds you useful"
"What she did with you was rare, count yourself lucky, but don't take in for granted"
You felt dizzy, like your world was spinning. Your friends death flash before your eyes. Alcinas pure eyes. Elizabeth's words. She can't be the monster that killed them.... can she?
The real question is why does she like you? She she have a plan? Because so do you....
You make you way to your room speed walking as fast as you could. Not wanting to run to make a scene to the night shift guard maids. You enter your room and quickly lock the door behind you. You jump into your bed and cover yourself under the duvet.
Tomorrow is a new day. You thought to yourself. Your mother's voice echo in your head.
"She's a monster, but we'll get our revenge."
"Don't trust her y/n, be brave and remember the plan"
You soon fell asleep hoping that tomorrow doesn't cause trouble.....
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ronwestbreeze · 1 year
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TO YOU , WORLDS AWAY : PART TWO : CHAPTER THIRTEEN
pairing: jake sully x fem!reader
summary: in which tinkers is alive
word count: 2.8k
author's note: i think the psa i posted is enough for an a/n note but if you didn't see it, just remember for future chapters going forward, please don't tell me how to write my story. i write it the way i want it and you can choose to enjoy it or not. and if you don't that's completely fine, just don't be mean about it. okay? okay.
AO3 | prev | next
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He thought of the dead, far too often than he’d like to admit.
It wasn’t always a bad thing though, at least that’s what Jake thought. Out of all of them, he had learned the most, he had grown, and he had become the man he was today because of them.
He equally thanked them as much as he grieved them. And to be honest, it took him a long time for him to get to that point. It used to anger him, used to pain him, used to numb him…now Jake only felt, well, he really couldn’t define that yet. It wasn’t denial. It definitely wasn’t acceptance. Just something in the middle, something gray, something nobody could put a name to.
There were different levels to his pain when he remembered those he had lost.
Jake thought of his brother, Tom, from time to time. It was a lot easier than the others as he began to come to terms with his sudden death. They weren’t really close but it was still his brother, you know? Still his other half. And no matter how close or how far apart they were, it still felt as if he had lost another half of himself. A half that he was never going to get back, that would never be replaced because it would always belong to him. And that was okay.
Then there was Tsu’tey. Often he’d find himself doubting his role as the Olo’eyktan and wondered why he was even chosen to lead these people. But the last person he would’ve expected to believe in him, chose him. That had to say something right? That had to be worth something.
He thought of Grace because of course he did. Grace probably had one of the biggest impacts on his life, introduced him to the world of Pandora, gave him a chance even when he definitely didn’t deserve it in the beginning. Perhaps he still didn’t deserve the compassion she gave him. Still to this day, he wasn’t so sure why she believed in him despite everything. It hurt thinking about her, knowing that she would’ve loved to live among the Na’vi like him. Knowing she would’ve loved to meet her daughter…
Jake just hoped that he could do right by her by raising Kiri as his own.
But when thinking of Grace, he couldn’t help but think of…
There was just too much there.
Sometimes he’d feel guilty. Sometimes he wished that Neytiri, whom he had come to love and cherish over the years, wouldn’t see just how much it still hurt him. And he didn’t know why, but this kind of hurt…it was unlike anything he had ever felt before. This kind of hurt scared him, so much that he had to force himself to numb it down in the beginning—still to this day sometimes—because he knew that if he allowed himself to feel this pain, if he allowed himself the luxury of this grief, he’d fall apart.
But Neytiri saw it. She always did.
She knelt down in front of him one day, after finding him sulking silently on a rock one night, and he told her in a broken whisper:
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I…I’m sorry.” It was all he could say, it was all that could escape his lips when he faced her, when he saw the look of knowing in her eyes, when she gave him a sad smile. It was just guilt and grief weighing him down, keeping him heavy and stuck to the ground.
Neytiri smiled sadly, “Oh, Ma’Jake.” She’d place a hand against his cheek and say, “Not even the strongest warrior could ever forget their lost mate.” Jake remembered staring at her in both confusion and shock. “Ma tsmuke, she was your first mate. She was always meant to be a part of this family. It is okay to be sad, Ma’Jake. I am sad sometimes too. I miss her too.”
That day just made him realize it would always still hurt. It didn’t stop it. But at least now he knew why.
It even hurt sometimes when Neytiri would say things like, “I pray to the Mother every day for tsmuke.”
“Why?” He found himself asking. “Wouldn’t it be better to just accept it…that she’s gone?”
Neytiri shook her head, “It is not the same as Tsu’tey or ma sempul. No. I do not believe a warrior like that is just gone. Not like this.”
Jake would frown but not say anything to discourage it. Perhaps it was just her training with the Tsahik, perhaps she was just becoming more spiritual each day she trained with her mother. Either way, he couldn’t find it within himself to tell her that you might’ve been gone.
They never found your human body. Your avatar was under Norm and Dr. Max Patel’s care.
It was just better to assume. Better to let it go now.
You were alive! You were alive! You were alive!
Okay, you supposed that was true. But you also felt like shit so you really didn’t know that being alive was the best revelation right now.
When you opened your eyes, there wasn’t a bright light waiting for you anymore. Only what looked like a wooden ceiling or was it made out of sticks? You really couldn’t tell. What you did know was that everything in your body felt weak and terribly sore. But this time you felt like you were able to move.
Well, at least you thought so at first.
It was a slow process, sitting up and finally taking in your surroundings. From what you could see, it appeared like you were in some sort of hut. The walls were made of wood and the ceiling, as it turned out, was made of long grass. There was a door across from where you had been lying and two smaller holes similar to windows. And judging from the windows, it looked as if it were the late afternoon. At least.
Once you were sitting up, your senses were beginning to kick in. A mask was on your face. Sight was already covered so the smell came next. It was grass and fish that hit your nose first. The grass bit made sense but you had no clue where the fish smell was coming from. Then sound. There were voices, speaking in Na’vi, farther away—no it sounded like it was coming from beneath you. Touch. Something was covering—no, wrapped around your hands and fingers preventing you from fully feeling the rough hammock that you lied on.
Your mind was still foggy, still confused at where exactly you were. Of course, the last thing you remembered was crashing the Samson into the other one that had been shooting at you. You remembered one of its blasts caught your wing and had been one of the reasons why you went down. You remembered fire. You remembered your mask had been broken.
And then it wasn’t. Which, now that you thought about it, didn’t make much sense. Maybe your mask never broke and the smoke from the fire made you delusional.
But then there was another issue and you were quickly reminded of it when you tried moving one of your arms, only to feel a sharp pain at your side.
That crash should’ve killed you. Maybe not on impact but after, there should've been no way you survived.
So how…?
Deciding you weren’t going to get any answers by just sitting, you threw the misshapen blanket—which was made of leaves—off your body and moved to stand.
Only you stopped suddenly when you saw…
Both your legs were wrapped in what looked like leaves and through those leaves, you could see the burns and barely healed scars riddled all over your legs. It was bad enough you could barely keep yourself upright but now you realized you could barely move your injured legs. You had no strength left in you to do so.
It didn’t feel real. For a moment you were sure this was some type of nightmare, that you were still asleep. Or maybe you were dead and left in some horrid hell. But once your bandaged hand grazed one of your legs, barely touched it, everything came crashing down. Everything became real.
You were alive. You were alive. You were alive….
“Dr. L/N?”
The new voice startled you, mostly because you hadn’t heard anyone come into the hut. When you looked up you were met with a Na’vi—no, an avatar—standing before you with a kind yet cautious smile. Cautious as if she were approaching an animal.
You didn’t reply. Mostly because you were waiting for the stranger to introduce herself first since clearly she knew who you were. The avatar cleared her throat, “I’m Dr. Chloe Parker. You may not know me but I was one of the volunteers for Dr. Augustine’s Avatar Program…”
The name wasn’t familiar or maybe it was, you really couldn’t think about it right now. There was too much going on. Your entire body, the recent revelation that you were in fact not dead—hell you didn’t even know where the hell you were.
“I imagine you have a lot of questions—”
“Where am I?”
Dr. Chloe nodded understandingly, “We are currently with the Olangi Clan who have been gracious hosts to us for the past few months.” She chuckled nervously, “But to be completely honest, I think they’re mostly tolerating us at this point…”
The Olangi Clan? The name wasn’t unfamiliar but you also weren’t sure what and where it was. That’s when you remembered what had been going on before your ship had crashed. That’s when you realized why everything felt strange. The reason why you were so tense and on guard…
“What happened with the battle? With the Sky People?” Your stomach twisted in on itself. “Are the Omatikaya clan…are the People…are they alive?”
God, if you were the only survivor, if you happened to be the sole person to survive all of it—
“No, no, no, they’re fine!” Dr. Chloe quickly reassured, kneeling down. When she did, you noticed the pit where a bonfire most likely would be lit at the center of the hut. “Our side one—the Na’vi, I mean! The RDA were exiled and some of us were allowed to stay afterwards and sort of live on Pandora.”
They won? They defeated the Sky People? There was a great relief that fell onto your shoulders, but it didn’t overshadow the tenseness, the exhaustion, and the grief. Just looking down at your injured legs, your entire body, it made it all the more heavier, all the more overwhelming. You were happy, you were angry, you were resentful. And you were sad. You were just really, really, sad.
Dr. Chloe noticed the way you looked down at your bandaged legs and frowned, “…It was an Olangi warrior that found you after your crash. Said Eywa pointed him toward you—or whatever that means…” Your brows furrowed at this but you didn’t stop her from continuing. “He brought you back here, to the plains, and it was mostly the healers keeping you alive for a while. Then my research team arrived and they showed us to you. One of the healers said that you weren’t getting any better and that’s where we stepped in…” She gestured toward you. “At first we tried healing you ourselves but you kept crashing. The wounds were too severe and…well your heart stopped a few times…”
Unshed tears clouded your eyes. Even if they fell you couldn’t wipe them away. You should’ve been grateful, thankful that you were alive now. That you were lucky to have even survived this war.
You were alive. You were alive. You were alive.
Dr. Chloe continued, “We realized at some point that we didn’t have the equipment to manage it…so we put you in cryosleep.”
You closed your eyes. The hut was quiet. You felt Dr. Chloe watch you, feeling her hesitation to keep going.
“How long?”
“Pardon?” She cleared her throat.
You looked up at her, “How long was I in cryosleep?”
Her hesitation already gave you some idea of an answer.
“Five years.”
It was quiet again. You couldn’t say anything. Nothing could have prepared you for this. You had been in cryosleep before and that was when you arrived at Pandora for the first time. Since then, you never thought you’d be placed back under in any circumstance. 
You never thought you’d miss five years of your life just to be half alive.
Five years. Five years just like that. Gone. Suddenly, it didn’t matter how much you contributed to the battle, the relief in knowing your side had won, that Grace’s death wasn’t in vain. None of that mattered when you had spent five years of your life asleep. Missing everything.
Your mind wandered and thought of Jake.
“Dr. L/N?” Dr. Chloe spoke again after a while. “I don’t know if you’ve realized but this is pretty groundbreaking stuff. We were able to save you and keep you alive with our newer machines—think of ECMO machines but better! We’re literally keeping you alive right now because of it.” As she said that, you noticed the tubes attached to your arms and the machines next to your hammock. “You’re a scientist, right? Think of the amazing breakthroughs we could have! It could give us more time, more time to heal patients before their body takes over and kills them! Like for you, for example. Your body could have been unsalvageable if not for our life support machines. Without them…well you could be dead, but that’s why we’re working with the Na’vi to heal you more.”
You didn’t know why, but her growing grin was pissing you off. And it certainly didn’t help keep the tears at bay.
“What’re you thinking, Doc?”
You didn’t even hesitate with your words. “I’m an engineer. Not a scientist.” Your gaze then fell toward the ground. “And I’m thinking you should’ve let me die.”
Again, the hut went silent. Your eyes remained locked on the floor. Dr. Chloe didn’t say anything else and you were glad. All you wanted right now was to be alone. Just alone. Except she wasn’t leaving.
Before you could snap at her, shout at her to leave, someone else entered the room. Instead of another avatar, it was a Na’vi woman. And by the looks of her clothes and accessories, she looked like a healer.
“What are you doing in here?!” The woman snapped in Na’vi. Dr. Chloe scurried to her feet. And you realized, tiredly that you were the smallest person in the room next to the two. “She is supposed to be resting! You should not be here!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Dr. Chloe backed away so the Na’vi woman could walk toward you with a wooden bowl in her hands. The doctor’s Na’vi sounded rough but well enough for you to understand her. Dr. Chloe nodded to you before finally leaving the hut. You barely acknowledged her though as the Na’vi woman began checking the bandages around your arms and fingers.
You realized then you were still in a hospital gown. She poked your arm with a needle and you flinched.
“Don’t move.” The healer snapped. You mumbled out an apology. “Your body is weak, you shouldn’t move too much.”
Quietly, you watched her observe your bandages and injuries. Some of them you caught a glance of the worser burns and it made your stomach twist violently. It made you realize how badly wounded you had been, how hard both the humans and the Na’vi seemed to work on keeping your body healing despite the severe ones. Really, you weren’t sure if it was worth the hassle.
While trying not to flinch at another needle poke, you ask the woman quietly, “What’s your name?”
“Ìtxata.” The healer looked at you curiously before focusing back on your left leg.
You winced when you tried scooting closer off the hammock, “When will my body…when will it not be so weak?”
Ìtxata didn’t respond right away. It wasn’t out of hesitation but mostly out of thought as you saw the crease appear between her brows. “It is hard to say….” She glared at the machines around you. “But the Sky People think they’re way can prevent death…nothing can prevent death…no matter the machine.” She then placed a gentle hand on your knee while examining it. “Your body is weak. And it will continue to get weaker until you die. This is only slowing the process.”
It was hard at that point. To hold back the tears. But your body eventually became to worn to remain upright and Ìtxata sensed this right away as she guided your body back to lying down in the hammock. The mask didn’t hide the tears or the restrained sobs but thankfully Ìtxata didn’t bring attention to them.
Instead she continued observing your wounds while you cried, and cried, and cried.
You were alive…You were alive…You were alive…
Coming out of her dreams, Kiri felt dried tears on her cheeks…
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taglist: @luvvfromme @sully-stick-together @jakesullylvr @s-u-t @ssc7514 @cheari @tojigirl @nyotamalfoy @perfectprofessorloverapricot @naityelen @dumb-fawkin-bitch @raggedyoldwitch @nhemmingsf @biooiuygjjgfsrb @thatsenoughformelol @thotd-f1 @beaniebeensbaby201 @theoriginalwife000 @3leni @23victoria @lovesickollie @atxara @im-in-a-pansexual-panikk @ladylovegood-69 @punchyprincess23 @lovekeeho @lilithmoon14512 @n7cje @fyfy-world @cleverzonkwombatsludge @goddesslilithmoriarty @itszzmoon @eternallyvenus @bajadotcom
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my1oves · 12 days
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!!!Contains spoiler !!!
How about Mithrun getting saved by a tall-man(fem/gn from Laios'ss party) when he was about to get killed by the goat demon and one of his only desires becomes meeting ,thanking ,getting to know that person?
(if timeline bothers you, you can say this tall man aged slower or that they used some type of time magic to go back to save him at least a little ?)
savior
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꒰ includes ꒱ ⸻ (dungeon meshi) mithrun.
꒰ warnings ꒱ ⸻ gn! reader, angst & some gore in the middle (a good ending though), ignores the canon timeline & also has some wishy washy time-portal-dungeon-magic stuff (let's imagine all dungeons are connected through time and space for this story)
꒰ blossom's note ꒱ ⸻ goodness this was so much fun to write (albeit sad and gory). i want to hold his hand and tell him everything will be okay and look after him and help him find new desires aUGH MITHRUN HAS MY HEART PLS- ahem, anyways... thank you for the request! i hope you enjoy it!
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“It’s you.” Mithrun rasps, staggering forward towards you, almost tripping over himself. “How are you still… I didn’t think I’d get the chance to-” His hand weakly reaches out for you, but you take a hesitant step back. You were scared. You didn’t know who he was, and he could tell. Did he get the wrong person? No. There was no way he’d get it wrong. You looked exactly the same as you did then. His heart was stirring in his chest, a long since unfamiliar feeling for him. 
“Do I know you?” Your guard was up. Did you forget about him? But how could you possibly… That moment wasn’t just something from another weekday- was it? It was the worst moment of his life, and you saved him from it. So why…
“You saved me. I- I found you.” 
“I think you’ve got the wrong person.” You offer, but he doesn’t seem to accept that. No. He was sure of it, whoever it was he was looking for, he was set on it being you. You couldn’t help but feel compassion for the elf. He looks like he’s been through hell and back. You wish you had been the person who saved him, the person he was looking for.
“No. It was you. I know it was, please, remember.”
“I’m sorry. I wish I could, but…” You take another step back, guilt gnawing at you at his panicked and hurt gaze. “I wish I was the one you were looking for but I’m-” 
Another step back, it was your last, as you feel your footing slip. You hear shouts of your name coming from somewhere, Laios yelling for you to grab on but there's nothing for you to grab. The last thing you see is Marcille and Izutsumi peering over the edge of a cliff before you black out.
And when you wake, you find yourself in a dark room.
Wincing, you sit up and look around. This dungeon… You could feel it immediately, this dungeon was not the same one you were just in. The air was completely different. Weakly standing up, you steady yourself before calling out. “Laios? Marcille? … Senshi?” But no response. It was just you. 
Picking your sword off the ground, your ears pick up a commotion, and then blood curdling screams. Despite the ache in your bones, you rush after the scream, opening the door and turning down one hallway to the next, you finally stand outside the room. Despite the eerie silence that now hangs heavy in the air, the stifling atmosphere coming from this room is deadly. Your hand touches the knob, icy cold, before turning it and pushing it open. 
With horror, you watch as a goat-man-monster-thing digs its thumb further into the eye of the victim- one you recognized. It was that elf from earlier, despite looking different, it was without a doubt him. With no time to speculate what was going on, you finally move. The squelching makes you queasy, and despite the fear coursing through you, and the trembling of your hand, you draw your sword. A shaky exhale, you close your eyes and charge with a piercing shout. 
“G- Get away from him!” You cry, swinging your sword wildly. This monster was definitely not one Laios had ever mentioned; You had no idea what this monster's weak point was. You only prayed you could at least scare it off so you could rescue the elf. 
Peaking an eye open, the demon stares at you with contempt. You had done nothing to truly scare the beast- in fact it didn’t even seem impressed with your bravery. It was annoyed. It removes itself from devouring the man before you, licking its lips as if it just enjoyed the finest meal. “Don’t… Don’t make me hurt you,” You say, pointing the sword at the monster as you drag the elf away. It lets out a sigh. 
“You will come to regret this.” It speaks, before flicking its wrist at you and the man. Gasping, you cling on to the elf tightly, holding him close to you as you two seem to get thrown through the ever-shifting labyrinth of the dungeon, before getting flown through a mirror.
Wheezing, you clutch at your ribs, surely to have bruised them pretty badly. “Are you okay?” All you get in response is a groan, and a lazy roll of the head. The man stares at you. Blood dripping down the side of his face, he rasps, reaching out for you weakly. 
“Tha–”
The door to the room gets thrown open, an army of elves standing right there. “A tall-man?”
“It’s Mithrun!” One shouts, and before you could speak, that familiar sinking sensation tingles at your knees. You glance down from your knelt position and find the purple portal. 
“W- Wait! Find me!” You shout, “Find me in the future! I’ll be waiting!” And then you’re falling, You’re falling, and falling, and falling until your back hits the ground with a splash. Landing in some water, you tilt your head back to see a familiar waterfall. Your eyes close, unable to hold on to consciousness any longer.
And when you awake, you’re surrounded by your party. Chilchuck is immediately scolding you for being clumsy, and Marcille is latching on to you with tears. Laios watches you from afar, shaking his with a ‘you gave us a scare’ whilst Senshi nods in agreement. Izutsumi just watches you carefully. You blink a few times, sitting up only to groan in pain. Yep, definitely some bruised ribs. 
“Where is he?”
“Where is who?”
“The elf! Mithrun!” You cry. Shit. Despite the pain shooting throughout your body, the throbbing in your head, the burning in your back, you push yourself to sit upwards. “I need to find him, I have to make sure he’s okay.” They all try to coax you into laying back down but you refuse, until the door opens and there he stands.
“You’re awake.” He says. “I know you do not remember me-”
You lunge at him, worried gasping sounds coming from your party members. You clutch on to his shoulders, his support being the only thing keeping you upright. (Perhaps you’ve broken a leg too…)
“I remember.” You say, squeezing his shoulders gently. “You’re okay… I’m so glad you’re okay.” You laugh weakly, relieved, your head falling forward with a shaky sigh. “Ah, I’m so glad you found me…” His eyebrows raise.
“You do remember.” Lifting your head up again to meet his eyes, you nod. “I… I’ve wanted to thank you for so long.” Mithrun’s voice trembles, perhaps the most emotion he’s shown since quite some time. “I finally get to meet you.” 
“A- As sweet and… uhm, confusing as this is, they really need their rest to heal.” Marcille breaks in awkwardly, not wanting to interrupt such a heartwarming reunion, but knowing you’re injured pretty badly.
“Oh, right.” Mithrun seems almost disappointed to hear this. “Could we talk later, then?” He asks, and you nod, with that gentle and reassuring smile that had him craving to know more. That desire that he thought he’d never get to fulfill blooming in his chest. “Then, get some rest. We will have plenty of time to talk later.”
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꒰ ❀ ꒱ thank you for reading. have a wonderful day, darling!
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iluvprettygirls · 8 months
Text
How to Be Kind! Do It Like Fluttershy, But Better!
This is for the girls who want to change, and become better people at heart. As a message to those, every human is born kind, but not every human dies with kindness still in their hearts. If you want to be kind, you have already completed the first milestone to becoming so, wanting to become kind.
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💗Understand Empathy: Recognize that other people have the same ability to feel how you feel. When something bad happens, you aren’t alone with your feelings. Some hide their emotions better than others, which doesn’t mean they don’t feel them at all. You don’t have to feel pity, just understand that others are just like you deep down. They’re human.
💗 Smile! Wanna know why this is a tip? Imagine you are walking your usual route, and a well-kept person turns their head and smiles at you. What do you do? Most people smile back! Your first impression lasts only 2-5 seconds, spend it smiling, everyone loves smiles!
💗 Treat Yourself with Kindness: People will treat you how they see you treat yourself, and so will you. Feed your body, exercise it, make it feel and look good. The more respectable you look, the more people will respect you. And don’t forget to forgive yourself for things you haven’t done, you want to change right? Everything you failed at is a part of your success story that you will smile at one day.
💗 Practice Stoicism: Stoicism, in my own words, would be “The mindset of approaching intense situations with indifference, without complaint, and with deeper understanding.” Now this may seem like you’re limiting emotions, but like the saying says “There is no use crying over spilt milk!” Stoicism has helped me immensely when it comes down to being kind to others, and controlling my emotions in general. 
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💗 Listen: People love to talk when given the chance. The more you listen to people, even strangers, the more they’ll think that you like them and accept them for who they are. When people think you like them, a part of them will come to like you too. Bonus points if you remember what they told you and bring it up later.
💗 Avoid Judgment: Many are afraid of opening up because of judgment. If you create an environment where you are shamelessly being yourself, and you accept others being themselves around you as well. You have created this safe space where people love just being around you because you are YOU. And that’s one of the kindest things you can do to a person.
💗 Random Acts of Kindness: Help someone pick something up off of the ground, tell your little sibling that you like what they made, call your mother pretty on a random day. Random acts of kindness won't  just make you feel good, but there will always be someone in the distance who will notice you. And because of the kindness you portrayed, it makes them want to be a little kinder too.
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Remember, kindness isn’t easy, even Fluttershy had a hard time understanding it. Kindness may look effortless, but it does take a bit of opening up and compassion for humanity! Thank you for reading, and thank you for becoming the kind-hearted individual that we want to see in society!
@iluvprettygirls
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Text
দীনদান (Dino Daan)
There is no god in that temple”, said the Saint.
The King was enraged;
“No God? Oh Saint, aren’t you speaking like an atheist?
On the throne studded with priceless gems, beams the golden idol,
And yet, you proclaim that’s empty?”
“It’s not empty; It’s rather full of the Royal pride.
You have bestowed yourself, oh King, not the God of this world”,
Remarked the saint.
The King frowned, “2 million golden coins
Were showered on that grand structure that kisses the sky,
I offered it to the Gods after performing all the necessary rituals,
And you dare claim that in such a grand temple,
There is no presence of God”?
The Saint calmly replied, “in the very year in which, twenty million of your subjects were struck by a terrible drought;
The pauperized masses without any food or shelter,
came begging at your door crying for help, only to be turned away,
they were forced to take refuge in forests, caves, camping under roadside foliages, derelict old temples;
and in that very year
when you spent 2 million gold to build that grand temple of your’s,
that was the day when God pronounced:
“My eternal home is lit by everlasting lamps,
In the midst of an azure sky,
In my home the foundations are built with the values:
Of Truth, Peace, Compassion and Love.
The poverty stricken puny miser,
Who could not provide shelter to his own homeless subjects,
Does he really fancy of giving me a home?”
That is the day God left that Temple of yours.
And joined the poor beside the roads, under the trees.
Like emptiness of the froth in the vast seas,
Your mundane temple is as hollow.
It’s just a bubble of wealth and pride.’
The enraged King howled,
“oh you sham cretin of a person,
Leave my kingdom this instant’.
The Saint replied calmly,
“The very place where you have exiled the Divine,
Kindly banish the devout too".
--Rabindranath Tagore
[Translated from the original Bengali into English by Sandipto Das Gupta]
This poem by Rabindranath Tagore written in 1307( as per Bengali calendar ,I can't pinpoint the exact date in English calender but it is almost 123 years old) resonates greatly with the current event happening in India. I won't deliante on the exact events because everyone is aware of it and how the government of a secular state is politicising a certain religion to fulfil their agendas. How they are creating division among people by spreading misinformation and hate. You will found enough discussion about that in many beautiful blogs in this platform.( Do check them out) .
I just want to shed light on the desi side of Tumblr and how it has transformed from a safe haven for Indian people to a breeding ground of so called "Kattar Hindus "
I never really talk about politics or about my own experiences with religion in Tumblr . Maybe because I am scared of my mutuals attacking me ,telling me how I am brainwashed by " Leftist Atheist Ideology" and how I am too westernised to understand the intricacies of our great " SANTAN DHARMA" . I have been part of the Tumblr community for almost three to four years .I remember following the #desiblr and #hindublr tag mostly because I was interested on discussing and sharing experiences with like minded people. Being part of a family which believes on letting one choose their religious beliefs, my idea of religion was a mixture of a lot of things . But one thing was common among all of these , no religion is greater than other and all religions have the same end goal, that is to understand the true meaning of life. So Imagine my shock when I realise that the so called aware people of Tumblr and the #desiblr ( which apprently contained well educated ,genuine and open minded people) are actually hypocrites. Their idea of religion is very much confined within the sphere of Krishna Bhakti and glorification of Hinduism in name of love for god. Their religious understanding don't have place for religious minorities and people with different opinions . They only support and propagate a certain kind of Hinduism, continuously glorifying everything in name of love and respect for their " Santan Dharma" . In the span of these few years I have seen people completely ignoring the stories of people who faced casteism by telling them that they are " brain washed" and justifying casteism in the context of Ancient India ( apprently caste system doesn't discriminate amongst people , because that religious privileged upper caste person didn't experienced it first hand and therefore casteism is a myth )
They are first to criticize Muslim Invaders but love to turn a blind eye on the fascist qualities of their own religion ( one of them even went out of their way to justify The practice of SATI for god's sake and not only that they even ended up glorifying jauhar and polygamy) . They live in their own make believe world of Krishna Prem , Mahabharat fanfiction and desi girl aesthetic . It's ok to love your religion but to be blinded by that love and constantly undermine the experiences and ideologies of other is never right. They claim to hate the fascist qualities of Islam but now have ended up doing the same thing. They will bash you if you dare to tell them that you don't view Mahabharat as a part of Indian History or that you don't like following the superstitious beliefs that are prevalent in name of Hinduism. #hindublr and #desiblr were supposed to be place where Indian people could express and share their own experiences with their religion and ethnicity ,but now it has became the breeding ground of religious extremists who proudly propagate religious hate and constantly try to find absurd loopholes to justify their hatered.
Having said that I would like to point out that not everyone is like that ...I have met so many religious people who had openly accepted different ideologies without belittling their experiences.
I am not a great writer unlike @papenathys and many other people in this platform who constantly tries and does their best to point out the hypocrisies of the people in this platform and show them a mirror to a realities of their religion, but I just want to vent out ...I am sorry if my writing is haphazard and not good enough .I know a lot of people (including my mutuals) will not like this, but I am tired of pretending that everything is perfect in this country, I am tired of pretending that 22nd January was a simple religious occasion not a huge political step just for the sake of election , I am tired of the seeing this constant war to prove one religion is greater than another . I am tired of constantly seeing privileged people mocking and belittling the struggles my community faced in the name of caste. I am tired of trying to pretend that Hinduism and Hindu people fit in the mythical reality Tumblr like to portray , I am tired of waking up in a land where people are so blinded by their love for a figure that may or may not exist that they have forgotten basic humanity. You may try to pretend that the " Sanatanis " are not propagating hatered, casteism, fascism by giving an example from your own privileged life but the reality is much darker.
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