#here sits retainer

[creamiceandsugar]

i am once again gnawing on that one part from heavenly demon arc

makes me crazy

#and then when the ghost (it's been too long i forgot everyone's names) goes #ah but to understand suffering you first must experience happiness #how else will you retain the strength to keep going #how else will you understand true injustice #and im just fucking Sitting Here #trying to read an Action Manhwa #sss class suicide hunter #sss class revival hunter

[justalittlebluetiefling]

Finished reading a book with SECONDS to spare. So proud of myself.

#i was sitting here like 'can i read a page a minute' and retain the info #the answer was yes

[grokebaby]

Deconstructing this A. Cola named entity... What's under that faux fur..

#Oc art #Mewmew Agricola #Surreal art #Cat oc #Mecha oc #(kind of??????? Idk that's the point) #Pencil art #notebook drawing #Creature #Should we really start thinking more deeply about an alien mech creature who somehow turns into a normal looking cat #AND TWO DIFF VEHICLES #Ngl I want Mewmew to also turn into some more. Practical everyday vehicle #Uh anyway I had some thoughts about this #Mewmew being so abstract and being born out of simple joy for having something whimsical and nonsensical #Shockingly‼️(sarcasm) lends well to cosmic horror. Or body horror. Maybe. Idk. #But hey it's a silly kitty #I'm not trying to dig too deeply under mews skin bc I feel like. They were already trying that back in the alliance #Mew deserves to retain some mystique and will to just. Exist. But #But..... (sits here ominously) #On a more normal note I am enjoying notebook drawing :)

[mclennie]

this year i think i really figured out that I shouldn't just read classic works/academia stuff bc it sometimes doesn't spark joy and I need joy to read, like I re-read the hunger games trilogy while I was down with covid for the first time in 13 years and finished it super quickly because the words are so simple and the writing is so clean and contrite almost to the point that it wasn't enjoyable because I felt I wasn't being challenged.

I remember when I first read the series at like 12-13 how gripping the story was. I read THG for class and would go home and read every night until I finished, then I went out and bought the second book, because I was so crazy to know what happened next. I've always liked Collins' sense of pacing and ending every single chapter with a gut punch, because you're just like ooh what's gonna happen next, I need to turn the page.

anyway, that's all to say that I read TBOSAS for the first time while on covid bed rest and it was a joy to feel that feeling again and she's the only writer who's ever gripped, dare i say, ensnared, me with needing to know what happens next. like i cannot live, i cannot breathe if i do not know how it ends. so that's how i figured out i need to read more contemporary books.

#then i read mexican gothic but im still in a reading slump #i wanna get back to reading war and peace but I haven't picked that up since august and I still having finished el norte #i was also thinking it's time for a hundred years of solitude reread #i also want to read this book la hacienda which is also about this trend of putting characters into a gothic story but in Mexico #i never finished the sun also rises #and a farewell to arms has been sitting here collecting dust #i probably will just manage to finish the go tell it on the mountain #also another author that's managed to retain my attention enough #I read GIovanni's Room really fast #me

[oflgtfol]

stars are like my least favorite astronomical object (so sorry, controversial i know) and so i’m only just sitting here realizing that like stars, as a general topic, is so complex wtf. stellar classification all on its own is a whole thing with many different ways to categorize stars (harvard spectral classes, mk luminosity classes, HR diagram, stellar populations, etc), nevermind stellar evolution, including formation and death, and then stellar spectra and the physics behind that, and then the like actual physical anatomy of the sun and heliophysics, space weather, etc? and the nuclear physics behind fusion? what the fuck man

#ive always been more into cosmology and that mostly just deals with galaxies #i love galaxies ! #i took a whole class on stars and it was when i was at rock bottom mentally so i really did not retain anything from it #but i do fucking know we never learned how to actually classify stars #like the basic spectral classes #so sitting here throughout today trying to relearn and reteach myself starting from 0 its like wait i never formally learned this anyway?? #most of the class was on stellar evolution 😩😩 #like idk i think stars are theoretically cool like oh big giant massive star go boom supernova wow so cool #but like theres. so fucking much physics behind all that its really quite snore actually. idk i think stars are overrated 💁 #fucking pp chain vs cno cycle #UGH add nuclear physics onto this list too #meanwhile my whole class about galaxies was just like tee hee. Galaxies #brot posts #astro posting

[officialbillhader]

cannot tell you guys how infinitely better i feel today compared to yesterday at this time

#awesomepie3221 #yesterday i barely managed to wash my hair while sitting down in the tub #today i just went and washed my hair brushed my teeth AND retainer put a blanket down over my sheets so im sleeping on spmething cleaner #im still not 100 but i am A LOT better #yesterday i didnt eat except a few timy bit of gaucomole and barely had any liquids. today ive had soup crackers porkchop and at least more #water #i cant believe how bad it was yesterday #man i got multiple words here wrong. i washed my body* today. ate a few bites of avocado*

[rxttenfish]

today i offer you another bad opinion of mine:

i really wish podcasts would stop making TTRPGs. honestly i wish that trend had never even started.

#all the care guide says is 'biomass' #me sitting here and groaning deeply and painfully over ogoa's ttrpg #its. not great. #its not a podcast but the worst of these is the mystery flesh pit ttrpg #just. chronically unable to retain even a basic semblance of the tone. #to the point of seemingly existing in an entirely different genre. #listen. not everything was made to be a ttrpg. #you must accept this.

[cheekblush]

i’ve been sitting in front of my chemistry notes for 3 hours crying because i just can’t retain any information

#i'm absolutetly mortified about tomorrow's final #my head hurts so much i can't concentrate at all #and no matter what i look at or read through i just can't remember or understand anything #this might sound silly but please pray for me that i'll pass the exam tomorrow otherwise i'll have to repeat the school year #unfortunately they don't give any second chances if you fail a final you automatically have to repeat a year it's absolutely horrible #i think i never felt so unprepared for an exam in my life even though i'm sitting here trying to study nothing works #i'm gonna try to summarize the most important things & hopefully i can retain some of that information #it's just SO MUCH to remember & i think our teacher didn't properly prepare us for this final #please please please please please please let me pass this exam i am on my knees crying i really am #i'm so anxious i just can't seem to calm down #☁️

[tallbluelady]

I’d say we’ve earned a few days of domestic bliss, wouldn’t you?

#aether and anatomy #rowan argentas #urianger #wol x urianger #i got to the point where i'm more or less done decorating my in game house #the basement could use some work but uhhhh #i got the primary bedroom and urianger's study done #and the kitchen and sitting room done #so i might invite people over at some point uwu #also i am tempted to buy an extra retainer and retainer level up to have a urianger retainer #and have him live here #but we'll have to see

[icewindandboringhorror]

Current temperature inside of my room right now in the middle of the night whilst about to go to sleep... villain origin story...

#You just get SOOOOO tired of being hot all the time for multiple days straight.. with very little relief ever... hhHHHH #I forget that I literally lose my mind and become evil every summer like clockwork #I don't evenknow what I mean by that because I'm just as calm/monotone as ever lol.. but I just feel more evil.. low level pent up rage #or something. nothing changes on the outside but on the inside it's like hmm.. I'm like 5% more hostile than I usually am #not outwardly expressed still of course. but just.. my bones are made of a little more violence recently.. #percentages moving around. My character stats get a temporary modifier all summer where I feel chronically just a LIIIITLE more noticably #unhinged. like I will never do it of course. but I will think about. maybe I'll just throw all the plates at the wall and break every wind #ow with a baseball bat. No. I shant. I would never.. but .. I could. 5% more than I usually could. But I shan't. but let it be known.. I #c o u l d ...i COULD.. if I had to. but I don't.. but still.. keep the notion in the back of the mind.. hmm.. lol #And this is not even during a heat wave at the moment it's just like.. normal summer.. >:') #I think it's also largely the shitty apartment which was not built for coolness. Like older houses will have tall cielings and those window #above the doors and ceiling fans and be built high up from the ground and all these other ways to manage warm weather #naturally. but cheaply constructed dinky city apartments with no ventilation and windows only on one side and blah blah #It retains heat insanely like being trapped in a green house or something #even with all the windows open & fans in the house and stuff it just doesn't really move air well because the space is not made to do that. #Also really testing my anticapitalism/leftism/etc... sitting and thinking 'damn maybe I should play the stock market.. I should sell #some sculptures and overprice them.. howmuch could I charge for these clothes..' < *is desperate to afford a living situation with central #heating and air conditioning* #Haha! Guillotines?? who said anything about those? I LOVE rich people.. haha.. now what's a guy gotta do to instantly get about $50.000 ar #ound here? haha! kidnap someone and sell their organs? okay haha! I love the free market! going to home depot right #now to buy an axe! Don't you just hate taxes? so glad I live in the best country in the world under the best economic system on the planet #USA! USA!! USA!!! *visibly shaking. nose starts bleeding. you notice i am also levitating off the ground slightly* #ANYWAY gfgfgh.... winter......... my sweet child....i miss you so so much.... SUMMER you are my ENEMY #ah well now it's gone down to 80.4 Farenheight. cancel post. thats such an improvemtn surely I'll be able to sleep soundly now /s #what was I ever worried about? it's all good! haha!! *still levitating a little * #In better news - I have finished the Victorian Pharmacy documentary series and am now watching them build a medieval castle! and one of my #goofy joke song snippets suddenly got 6.000 views on youtube which was cool?? though very random? I made kale chips again. and had asparag #us. And saw a duck. carved a lot of things out of avocado pits. Little tidbits to keep me sane.. #See a funny little duck outside and go 'hmm... life is okay actually :) I no longer want to break windows :3' #then it gets like 85F inside again and you're liek NEVERMINDaaaaaaahhh!!!!! then you see a duck next morning and calm down :)

[cerealmonster15]

leo fire emblem loves his retainers so much,,, hes like “yeah these 2 are the weirdest fucking people ive ever met in my life. yes i love them with all my heart and never want to go a day without them. what of it.”

#i think abt leos A support with odin so often... #where hes like i trust no one more than u #i want u and niles by my side always #if u fall into another world somewhere plz still carry ur title with u #wait no it's the c convo where he says 'There is no one I can count on more than you' #god. thats love #also fjskdlfjdslj i forgot leo was like #hey odin you arent spouting nonsense lines like normal. r u okay. like jfklsdfjdksljf #' I don't know what I would do if I lost you.' #' I need you and Niles by my side. Even after we've restored peace to this world' #like hello??? HELLO???? god. !!!! #wait holy shit im sitting here rereading this and theres like #it's way more potent than i remember holy fuck #there arent many like you. it'd be harder to go on. success w/o u would feel hollow. #id prefer u remain my retainer forever. carry ur title so theres still a connection between us. #youre a loyal retainer but MORE IMPORTANTLY a good friend?? #im literally gonna cry theyre so fucking sweet #yes i know i started this talking about the three of them and then focused on leo/odin i just #i love them so much okay #leo values them both a ton tho ik this #i think people usually focus on leo and niles which is fair #but also just. he really truly loves odin so much and it's SO SWEET #like ship or not just the canon dialogue there is so soft n tender #'ya when i first met u i didnt trust u and tried to make u hate me and leave' #'anyway now i love u more than anything and cant bare the thought of losing u' #like. im sobbing about fates again leave me alone #niles: lord leo id literally die for u #leo: i love you too but please calm down #leo n niles @ each other: i fuckin hate u bitch fkljdsfld #'wait but we both love lord leo. ok we can be friends :) ur still a freak tho <3' fjkldsj

[muirneach]

girl help i’m thinking about super specific irish words and how we might lose them because most gaeilgeoirí only have very basic conversational irish

#i am once again yearning for pre-famine levels of gaeilgeoirí #complete with all the silly words that convey an incredibly specific emotion or object or person #there is 4400 words to describe a type of person! for example there is gormaire which means ‘lazy person who sits by the fire and is mean’ #like hello?? i love this language i wish we could retain these words #sorry. this is what happens when i read too much about manchán magan’s work #i really want his books i wish i had seen him live when he came here a few weeks ago!! #*months ago not weeks whoops idk why i typed that #but god yeah hes the goldmine for super specific irish words my god #but his books are so expensive 😭 #and also ive been scrolling teanglann just clicking on random words in the sidebar its very fun #ive written down a lot of my faves #honestly im looking for a new url and i might go for a fun super specific irish word #cause who knows maybe gormaire dot tumblr dot com is in my future #representation for the girls who sit by the fire doing nothing except bitching! #irish

[baekuras]

Finished the Hell's Paradise anime and really REALLY you're gonna end it there? I want my closure in anime format as well right now pls and thank you this is just mean

#txts #i did read the manga fully #in a single sitting so no names got saved #especially tensen wise bc...guys.....i am bad with simple names dont add monikers etc onto it #oh wait i think i remember this one-aaaand they're dead now...okay...alright #to be fair its literally everyone #idk why this manga has me so bad with names i swear i am not usually THAT bad with them #i know what happens and who ppl are and how everything works who lives who dies and so on #but i could not tell you what anyone is called here #aside from Gabimaru #literally the one exception i easily remember #everyone else....i need to work on remembering again #anyWAY this turned into a side tangent #its just kinda funny bc its def one of my fav mangas #do not ask me why #i could not tell you #just scratches a good itch with everything going on in there i guess #but my brain just can not retain basic information i GUESS #hells paradise #jigokuraku

[red-dyed-sarumane]

theres like 2 posts about world building ive seen circulating & every time & im. wow. felt. i wish i had a cool story for my world but all my little guys end up like slice of life stories. & then i get to some minor detail about how would it be different from this world & instead of doing the reasonable thing of "this would be cool no one needs to know the specifics" im like. oh yeah the religions in the world would be different from this world that would be a fun little trivia thing [proceeds to make very in depth elaborations to various religions from different in universe countries] [makes up specific figures for them] [gives them weird little personal lives on top of the lore]. the fact i havent made a conlang for at least one of the countries is solely dependent on the fact its a lot more intricate than i have time for. i added whales in the sky so it'd be cool & instead of leaving it at that i went yeah sure why shouldn't they be in replacement of planes & have a history of breeding programs both for commercial flights & competitive whale racing & shows (much like horses) and on top of that different species have different tolerances to how high they can fly or how close to the poles/other hemispheres they can travel without having adverse effects. theres giant deer in the forests with their antlers & hooves composed of gemstones relative to the area theyre in. they have the ability to confuse people & make them walk in circles to remain undiscovered. literally a type of cryptid. theres region specific terrains & landscapes that each pose there own unique threats & rewards to people in them. there's islands that just float around in the sky -electromagnetism perhaps im still deciding on this one- that are near impossible to count so no one knows if theyve all been discovered or if the same ones are ever discovered twice. etc etc.

and this is all mostly irrelevant and or minor bc the single big thing that matters is that half of the population is born with some sort of psychic abilities that are highly personalized.

#the lore & trivia for this world is insane considering half of the characters would be just fine in a #real world but slightly different type setting #i just keep adding things & its like. buddy. no ones going to retain this. it doesnt matter. #button that says please ask me about my oc world its always morally correct to ask me about my oc world #i wish i had a cool story to show it all off but no i have this like #u would need to consume several different ocs stories to see half of jt #& i know everyone like. hates that type of story telling. so i just sit here #this is only touching on psychic world too i have like. 2 others as well but their less in depth

[radiotorn]

Last thing but. gogh the fucking lroplems are attacking me visciously tonight

#I'm sitting here thoroughly convinced im a broken person #like my memory is so bad. i cant retain anything anymore. i have to read shit so many times to understand what i read #every memory i remember feels like its from a past life im so serious i feel like a broken person #like i feel so fucked up that i WISH i was in school again so i could at least be forced to retain something #and feel like i was getting smarter or something. but im literally so fucking dumb and its actually embarrassing how little i know #about things and the world in general and its just like. im literally broken forever oh my god #ow.err

[lambentskies]

I’m looking at my fandom and design history tendencies and I’m realizing...

I was absolutely, completely doomed from the get-go. You know what’s been in my artblood since I was a kid? Jesters/clowns and dreams and day/night stuff. Disconnected limbs. Butterflies. Ribbons. Magic and theatre. Just a few years less? Tiny obnoxious bells, formlessness, and fluttery fabrics. I literally have a scarf that is laden in bells in my closet somewhere that I have been trying to figure out how to incorporate into my wardrobe. I have a bag of tiny bells I wanted to figure out things to stitch them to. I mean I am just.

Why the fuck am I even surprised at my original work scooping all of this up and dumping it in a cauldron while cackling madly, much less my fandom preferences? Throw in my absolute love of (supernatural) horror as a genre, and I’m just pfffffffffffffffff...

#aldlbabble #i have been sitting here and thinking about my designs #and pondering making some changes #even if it *would* weaken some of the connections to archie #i'm not sure it would be excessive? #at least not enough to matter overmuch :/a #and an is the one who mainly retains that resemblance due to how he came to be #the struggle with mask-heads