#hereandnow

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

#focus #today #present #mindfulness #living #hereandnow

[it-was-funeral-grey]

Over your head (Al Haitham x F!Reader)

Prequel Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Summary: knock knock! who's there? matra. matra who? you're under arrest, anything you say will be held against you. what.

Warnings: Vulgarities, getting arrested, doctors, boat travel

Word count:<2.6k words

Inspired by:-

Author's note: i hope this is ok! i was also able to visit my grandma the day after i posted the last part :)

Please give criticism! Also, if i missed any warnings, do tell me so i can add them!

If you had a Mora for every time a random dude cried himself to sleep on your couch, you'd have one Mora. Which isn't a lot, but it's strange that it happened once.

Oh, but if you had a Mora for every time the Matra arrested you for kidnapping, you'd have another Mora. Two Mora isn't a lot, but it could help you get a new bottle of Harra spice. Archon knows that prices have gone up recently.

"Secure the house," a man wearing the Matra's iconic teal and bronze uniform barks as three of his colleagues surround you. "And call a doctor!"

It happens so fast. Chains are fastened around your hands, and you feel a hand push against your back, forcing you forward.

All around, your neighbours peek out of their houses, watching as the three Matras lead you out of the village. You can hear them gossiping amongst themselves, casting curious glances as you pass them.

"Kidnapping? Her? Who would have thought…"

"She has always been so kind…I can't believe it."

Where to? You don't know. If you were courageous enough, you would've protested- ask what is happening. But words fail you. Your tongue feels like a brick, refusing to let you plead your case.

You've been told stories about the Matra. Village elders would spook kids with tales of the 'all-knowing, scary, and will eat you if you misbehave!' Matra. You've never thought of them as scary before, though. But now, you're beginning to think that the village elders weren't exaggerating.

Their presence alone was enough to render the bustling village silent on this beautiful, sunny afternoon. You've never heard the village go this quiet, not even during the dead of night. The only sound you hear now is the pounding of your heart, together with the remaining Matra stomping into your home, throwing things around in their search for evidence.

But evidence for what? Kidnapping? Who did you even kidnap?! The Green dude? You were only helping him, for archon's sake!

"The nerve! Kidnapping the Acting Grand Sage!" a neighbour rages to another. "Sumeru is relying on him to lead us out of this mess, and she dares to harm him! Oh, may Lesser Lord Kusanali punish her!"

Wait. Hold on.

Acting. Grand. Sage?

Mr Green man is the Acting Grand Sage?!

Kaveh is going to kill Al Haitham.

It's one thing to take his keys and only let him in after 5.05 pm.

It's a whole other thing to take his keys and not come home. Leaving him outside. In the rain. For the entire night. And it's the peak monsoon season in Sumeru, so he can't even dry his drawings that had been drenched the night before.

"Seriously! He's gone from bad to worse," Kaveh laments to the shorter man. "He didn't even tell me he wasn't coming home!"

"Well, have you seen him since yesterday?" the shorter man asks, taking a seat in his office and letting out a tired sigh as he sinks into his chair. He had just come back from tracking a scholar in the desert. He really doesn't want to listen to his friend's rant right now, but he doesn't have the heart to drive him away.

"No! He left that morning at 8:55, as usual. I tried to get him to drink a cup of coffee, but he ignored me! That arrogant fungus! I swear, I'm going to-"

There's a hasty pound on the door, interrupting Kaveh's rant. But before Cyno could invite them in, the door burst open, revealing a frantic Panah.

"General Mahamatra, Mr Kaveh," he greets, panting as he leans over, hands on his knees. He must have run from the Grand Sage's office. "Have you seen Acting Grand Sage Al Haitham?"

Well, that makes two people who have asked about his whereabouts today. Usually, this wouldn't be strange. As the scribe, Al Haitham had the habit of never being where you expected him to be. Even Cyno wouldn't be able to locate him if he seriously didn't want to be found.

But he's the Acting Grand Sage now. And for the last couple of months, he has always been findable- in his office or somewhere speaking to personnel. Cyno stiffens in his seat. Something doesn't feel right.

"No, we haven't seen him," Kaveh answers. But then he frowns. "Wait- what do you mean, 'Have you seen Al Haitham'? Did he not report for work today?"

Now, that's a concerning thought.

"Yes," Panah takes another deep breath, composing himself. "He hasn't come into his office yet. I know it's only ten minutes past 9, but-"

"Al Haitham isn't one for tardiness," Cyno interrupts, standing up. "Kaveh, are you certain he isn't home?"

"Well, yes," Kaveh replies, furrowed brows giving away his concern about his roommate. "He has this annoying habit of using the shower at full blast in the morning. It's unbelievably loud. I would have heard that if he were home since the front door is close to the bathroom."

"Panah, would you happen to know Al Haitham's last know location?"

"He was heading to Port Osmos. He was going to speak with someone in the Wikala Funduq."

Damn, Cyno curses. Port Osmos is at least a good three hours away by boat. Grabbing a loose sheet of paper from his desk, Cyno scribbles a note before sealing it and passing it to Panah.

"Pass this along to the dusk bird handlers. Tell them to send it to the Matra stationed in Port Osmos as soon as possible."

"On it!" Panah grabs the note, dashing out of the office.

"As for me, I'll be heading to Port Ormos now," Cyno states, grabbing his polearm. "Don't worry. I'll bring him back."

"Who says I'm worried? I just want to get into the house- hold on, I'm coming with you!"

Al Haitham is going to kill Kaveh.

It's one thing to wake up to the sound of him hammering away on another one of his projects.

It's a whole other thing to wake up to him screeching about- "Oh archons, if he dies, what am I going to do?"

First off, he's not going to die. He's not ill. Just tired, you fickle fungus.

Second of all, where in Teyvat is he?

There's a faint rocking sensation, and he can hear the faint sound of water sloshing nearby.

A boat, Al Haitham figures. Why is he on a boat?

Opening his eyes, he is immediately greeted by the sight (and sound) of Kaveh panicking at a lady in a white gown. A doctor, Al Haitham realises.

"Sir, the Acting Grand Sage isn't going to pass on," the doctor sighs. "He's just exhausted. He must have fainted from exhaustion- please tell him that he must get sufficient rest to recover!"

Before Kaveh can respond, Al Haitham sits up, fighting the dizziness that came with it. Nope. He doesn't want to hear Kaveh's annoying, panicky voice. Not now, when he can feel a headache coming.

"Al Haitham!"

"Keep your voice down, you-"

"Are you alright?" Kaveh interrupts, concern lacing his tone. But he doesn't give him time to answer before he continues. "Honestly. To think that you'd be kidnapped! You, of all people! Who could even stand having you as a prisoner?"

Huh?

But before he could ask Kaveh what he meant by 'kidnapped', the door to the room opens. Through the door, Al Haitham can see the deck of a ship. So he was right. He is on a boat.

"You're awake," Cyno says. "How do you feel?"

"I'm fine," Al Haitham groans, massaging his temple. "What's going on?"

So Cyno is here as well. Something big must have occurred.

Still a little groggy, Al Haitham rubs his eyes as he tries to recall what happened.

Ok, Al Haitham takes a breath. Let's think this through.

He was at Port Ormos around one in the afternoon to speak to the trade supervisors of Wikala Funduq. He wanted to talk to them about restoring the port for business- but the letters he sent there from the Akademiya were never answered. So, he had to make a trip down there himself, much to his annoyance.

That sounds about right. What happened next?

When he reached the port, he was greeted with silence. There was not a soul on the streets. The same could be said for the Wikala Funduq building, the place deserted and collecting dust, save for a lone cleaner working in a corner.

"Oh, you're looking for Mr Dilawar and Mrs Gauhar? They're not here. No one has been here for a while. There's no work here! Nothing to do!"

"Where can I find them?"

"Well...Mr Dilawar lives in Vimara village. I'm not too sure about Mrs Gauhar."

So that's how he ended up travelling to Vimara Village. He had to walk four hours to get to the village entrance since there weren't any boats that could take him there- the captain of the one that brought him to the port from Sumeru city had declined, saying that he had a personal vendetta against the village or something. Al Haitham didn't bother listening.

Yeah, he remembers that part. What happened then?

A soothing voice. A homemade meal. A gentle hand on his back. A comforting presence that made him feel so safe- something he hadn't felt in a very long time.

Wait.

Oh, no.

Before Cyno could answer his question, Al Haitham had already figured out the answer.

"You didn't happen to arrest a villager for kidnapping me, did you?"

"Oh, so you do know what happened," Kaveh answers on Cyno's behalf. "Yeah-"

"That wasn't what happened," Al Haitham interrupts, stumbling off the uncomfortable bed. "Where is she?"

"Hold on, what do you mean-"

"I mean what I said," Al Haitham snaps back, heading towards the door. The headache is now hitting with full force, and he hides a wince. "Cyno. Where is she?"

If you weren't in your current predicament, you'd probably be running around the deck, admiring the way the water below reflected the stars above. You've never been on a boat this big before- it wasn't as large as cargo vessels or cruise boats that carried rich Snezhnayans, but it's larger than anything you've ever boarded.

You also would have been really excited about going to Sumeru city- home of the rich, the smart and the accomplished. You've never travelled beyond Vimara village, apart from heading to Port Ormos every once in a while.

It's a quiet night. Apart from the occasional jingling of your chains secured to the railings on the deck, the two Matra who watch over you don't make a sound apart from occasional sighs. Curling yourself into a tiny ball, you hug your legs, burying your head on your knees. It's getting cold. Goosebumps have risen all over your limbs, and you try to rub your arms to get rid of them but to no avail.

Slam!

The loud sound shocks you back into reality. Lifting your head, you see that the door to the boat's accommodation has been flung open, the light in the room spilling out onto the dark deck.

A tall figure exits the room- although your eyes have already adjusted to the dark, you can't really tell who it is, but the two Matra seem to know. They immediately stiffen in place, standing at attention as the silhouette approaches the group.

As the figure comes closer, you see a faint green glow on its shoulder.

It's him. The Acting Grand Sage. The green man- ok, you gotta stop calling him that.

The Acting Grand Sage stops just a step away from you. You raise your head to glance at him, and he meets your gaze with an emotion you can't quite name.

"Ok, hold on!" there's the sound of hasty footsteps. A man with a feather in his hair runs up to the Acting Grand Sage. "What do you mean, 'that wasn't what happened'?"

"I'll have to ask you the same," there's calmer voice, this one belonging to a shorter man. "We can't release her if you don't tell us what happened."

The Acting Grand Sage sighs, facing the two that have just joined him. There's a tension in the air.

"I wasn't kidnapped," he starts. "I spent the night at her house. That is all."

Woah, that sounds suspicious.

The man with the feather looks like he's about to have a stroke. His jaw has dropped. Meanwhile, the shorter man looks like he has been frozen in place, eyes nearly budging out of their sockets.

"You- huh?!" exclaimed the feathered man, head whipping in your direction, intense eyes burning into yours. "You, let HIM spend the night? HIM?"

You jolt back in surprise, not quite expecting to be talked to, hitting your head on the railing with a loud 'ping'. You grimace in pain, bound hands raising to massage the area, chains jingling as you moved.

"Get your head out of the gutter," The Acting Grand Sage snarls, standing between you and the feather man. "She cared for me when I passed out. I slept on the couch."

"Passed…out?" the feathered man frowned, voice now soft.

"Well, the doctor did say he was exhausted." the shorter man added.

"That's not the time for this," the Acting Grand Sage changes the topic. He faces the shorter man. "Will you release her?"

The shorter man ponders for a moment.

"I can remove her chains," he answers. "But she'll still have to come to the Akademiya to give a statement. A report still has to be submitted, so I'll need your statement as well, Al Haitham. I'll go to get the keys."

With that, the shorter man leaves. The feathered man looks shaken up but quickly follows after the other.

"Are…you alright?" the Acting Grand Sage asks once the two are out of earshot.

"I…I'm fine," your voice wobbles. You haven't spoken since the Matra arrested you because you were afraid that your words would have been used against you later on. Well, that and the fact that you were scared shitless. You feel pressure build behind your nose. "I'm just-"

Your sniffle cuts your sentence short. Your eyes begin to water.

Behind, you hear the two Matra shift uncomfortably. Gosh, are you really gonna cry in front of everyone? How embarrassing. You're even making the Matra feel awkward. You avoid his gaze, trying to blink away tears.

The Acting Grand Sage seems to have picked up on your discomfort as he waves the Matra away. He tried to be subtle about it, but you don't miss the considerate gesture, even with your tear-filled vision.

"There's goosebumps all over your arms," there's a faint rustling of fabric. "It's not surprising. The wind is picking up. It'll probably start raining soon."

He walks behind you, and you feel something drape over your head, blocking your sight.

It must be his cape. It's warm.

You hear him lean onto the railings, letting out a sigh. A silence fills the air between you two.

It's nice. Relaxing. Comforting.

No one will see if I cry now, right?

So, you do.

But you weren't crying out of fear. No, these are tears of relief.

And through it all- the sniffling, the sobbing, the snivelling, the man behind you never said a word. But he didn't need to.

His presence was enough. Enough for what? You don't know.

All you know is that everything is going to be alright.

You're safe here. With him.

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#alhaitham x reader #alhaitham genshin impact #alhaitham #genshin impact #genshin x reader #hereandnow #al haitam x reader #al haitham

[zenwords]

If there is truly nothing that you can do to change your here and now, and you can't remove yourself from the situation, then accept your here and now totally by dropping all inner resistance. The false, unhappy self that loves feeling miserable, resentful, or sorry for itself can then no longer survive. This is called surrender. Eckhart Tolle! From The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment #kindlequotes #eckhartTolle #thePowerOfNow #hereAndNow #resistance #surrender #resentment https://www.instagram.com/p/CmHUmClud-k/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#kindlequotes #eckharttolle #thepowerofnow #hereandnow #resistance #surrender #resentment

[poppins-me]

#hereandnow #yogainspo #selfcare

[elenaorellano]

#photo #texture #beach #magic #island #brasil #florianopolis #pontadascanas #magnificence #hereandnow #bless

[bahrullmarta]

Untitled monotype print

block printing ink scratching on paper

2022

Minted as well as supporting Here & Now for their future project.

#monotype #printmaking #bahrull marta #objkt #hereandnow

[dpomalescreative]

Day 797 of 1095 Mourning can be so tough Man, it's Muther FukkiN rough we wonder what we could've done to change such an outcome Seems heaven pulled your number on this one My heart goes out to my LooVed Ones Grieving and hurting right now I'm doing my best to stay strong for them If only I could take the pain away If only we could've had just 1 more day He will be a missed son, brother and friend Poet, Entrepreneur and Musician Only God knows why I shall pray for you without asking why Yes I am my brothers keeper And I failed so miserably I will have to forgive myself inevitably But right now it's just too soon Sleepless nights staring at the moon I'm doing my best to realign my tune But right now I feel like a fool Right now I just don't feel good Caught up in life Lost in my moods I left you hanging my dude When You needed someone I didn't know what to do It's always been a dream of mine For us to perform together to Guess we'll have to settle for the solo I'm about to do Man We are gonna miss you I Pray heaven has the room You were larger than life here on earth Perhaps now your spirit will find its groove As we celebrate your life here Without you God must have needed you home So we raise our hands to heaven May you rest in peace now my brother As we must now MooVe forward Without you #ptsd #ptsdawareness #dpomlive #poetry #poetryworld #poetrywriting #writingtherapy #writing #therapy #anxietysupport #anxietyrelief #hereandnow # knockingonheavensdoor #withoutyou #inspired #inspiredaily #inspireothers https://www.instagram.com/p/CpnNhlPr4-z/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#ptsd #ptsdawareness #dpomlive #poetry #poetryworld #poetrywriting #writingtherapy #writing #therapy #anxietysupport #anxietyrelief #hereandnow #withoutyou #inspired #inspiredaily #inspireothers

[philosohappy]

“When we endlessly ruminate over distant times, we miss extraordinary things in the present moment. These extraordinary things are, in actual fact, all we have: the here and now.”

Quote by Katherine May

#presence #hereandnow #beingpresent #this moment #quote

[johnhmcintosh]

HERE AND NOW

JOHN MCINTOSH

“That which you seek – YOU already Are” … is a common spiritual phrase, and yet most then go on with their search ‘for’ IT – WHY?

Until the Real YOU is fully AWARE [again] of IT SELF, everything it speaks of is at most a ‘belief’ that the slumbering God-SELF [ONE SELF counterpart] has ‘faith’ in and ‘trusts’. But beliefs, faith and trust still engender some degree of doubt and are NOT the same as KNOWING. As a result, the Truth that ‘YOU already Are the SELF you seek’ is just a belief. If it were a KNOWING, there would be no ‘search’.

The ’doubt’ that exists is a product of the conditioning that remains as clouds that ‘seem’ to hide the ONE SELF YOU Are. This is why ultimately conditioning ‘must’ be dissolved. This process is NOT a ‘seeking out there’ but a ‘revealing’ right where you find yourself. It requires no special rituals, practices, costumes, disguises, mantras, visualizations, diets, chants or mantras … nothing. The simplicity of Self Inquiry/Surrender WILL dissolve ALL conditioning when you are ‘ready’ to be Free ‘here and now’.

YOU ARE GOD: It's Time To Shine https://www.amazon.com/dp/B017O16J8Y

BOOKS by John McIntosh https://www.johnmcintosh.info/copy-of-books

#HEREANDNOW #JOHNMCINTOSH

[lalihelen]

* "And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much it was mine to keep." - Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five #inspiration #meditation #life #thepowerofnow #hereandnow #Quoteoftheday #lifeisajourney #reflection #gratefulliving #soul https://www.instagram.com/p/CeBLMg6ogvY/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#inspiration #meditation #life #thepowerofnow #hereandnow #quoteoftheday #lifeisajourney #reflection #gratefulliving #soul

[pol-ahmeda]

В горячих словах Андрей Павлов не только поднял всю аудиторию на ноги, но и вбудоражил умы даже самых скептически настроенных участников. Его речь была пламенной, эмоциональной и проникновенной, заставляя сердца зрителей биться в такт каждому слову. Владелец компании ZENDEN не только делился своим видением будущего экономического развития, но и призывал к действиям here and now, оставляя за собой след не только в умах, но и в душах слушателей. Это было действительно великолепное выступление, способное изменить мир вокруг нас.

#горячие слова #АндрейПавлов #аудитория #речь #пламенная #эмоциональная #проникновенная #сердца зрителей #владелецкомпании #ZENDEN #видение #будущее #экономическоеразвитие #призывкадействиям #hereandnow #великолепноевыступление

[yr1source]

𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲, 𝗹𝗲𝘁 𝗴𝗼... 🍃 Learn how to meditate, gather your thoughts, act and speak consciously, master and explore your consciousness with us -> https://yr1.space/💫 Within

#HereAndNow #Universe #YR1 #Cogitality #QuantumPhysics #CreateYourReality #MindOverMatter #QuantumMysteriesCosmicConsciousness #HigherDimensions #QuantumMechanics #MysticalScience #ConsciousnessExploration #SpiritualPhysics #MetaphysicalMindset #RealityShifts #Meditation

[it-was-funeral-grey]

Celestia-sent (Al Haitham x F!Reader)

Prequel Part 1 Part 2

Summary: There's a weird guy lying outside your house.

Warnings: Vulgarities, food (stew) , mentions of injuries , crying, reader mistakes al haitham as a old guy lmao, reader lives in vimara village, spoliers for al haitham's lore,

Word count: <1.7k words

Inspired by: -

Author's note: it was kinda therapeutic to write al haitham's part- the first half. not sure why. it just felt so easy. i miss my grandma. i should visit her once i feel better.

Please give criticism! Also, if i missed any warnings, do tell me so i can add them!

He's just lying there, faced down. His grey hair sticks out painfully against the brown dirt path, and you fight the urge to squat down to take a closer look. It's a shade of grey you have never seen before. It kinda looks like the moon.

Another old drunkard, you think. There's been many of them recently in Vimara village. Ever since the scandal in the Akademiya three months ago, Port Ormos had crashed. The whole port is a mess- what once was Sumeru's most efficient had become disorganised and stagnant overnight. Now, it's akin to a ghost town- especially after the mass layoff of port employees.

Trading has halted completely, the Wikala Funduq citing 'awaiting instructions from Akademiya higher ups'. But so far, no one from the Akademiya has come down to remedy the situation and help revitalise Port Ormos.

As a result, private traders can't do business, and trading companies can't do business, so no one is making money anymore. Traders from Inazuma and Snezhnaya had stopped docking in Sumeru. In a couple more months, Port Ormos would lose its position as the central trading hub of Teyvat. Sumeru will lose a terrifying portion of its national income. It will only get worse from there.

Vimara village was outraged at the mass layoff. Most port employees lived there, after all. In an instant, families lost all sources of income. The village community had tried to help each other, sharing food and whatever they could with each other. But this was only a temporary solution. The stress of unemployment is beginning to weigh heavy on many, which is why many have taken to drinking recently.

Which is why you aren't surprised that a guy's passed out on the ground. What was surprising is that you had never seen this dude before.

He's wearing expensive clothes, you note. He's definitely not from the village. Clad in green, he'd almost look like a plant if not for his grey hair. There's a cape hanging off his back, and on a shoulder is what you think is a vision.

Damn, you wonder. What kind of guy is this?

Curiosity gets the better of you. Squatting down next to the old guy's side, you lay your groceries down. Strangely, you don't smell any alcohol on him. So, not a drunkard?

"Hey, uh… sir?" you shake his shoulder, brushing your fingers over his vision. It's cool to the touch, the green orb emitting a gentle glow amidst the fading daylight. "Wakey wakey, mister?"

The man doesn't wake. You sigh. What are you going to do? It's almost nighttime. You can't just leave him here. I mean, you could, but still…

There's a pleasant aroma in the air, accompanied by the sound of sizzling oil. Onions, Harra spice… stir-fried with snapdragon leaves?

It reminds Al Haitham of his grandmother's cooking. Maybe she's making dinner now. He's pretty hungry.

Huh. Now that he thinks of it, it has been a long time since he's had dinner with her. When was the last time he even spoke to her? Or visited her?

He has so much to tell her.

He has to tell her about his job as a Scribe. Well, for now, he's the ACTING Grand Sage. Not for long, though. He'll make sure of that.

He's got to tell her about the stunt he pulled to save Lesser Lord Kusanali. She'd enjoy that tale. Probably scold him for being so reckless as well, though.

Yeah, he'll do that. Maybe he'll ask for a second serving of rice too. He's really, really hungry.

Then, he'll ask for advice on how to handle the whole shitshow that he has been assigned to run. She'll know what to do. She always does. She'll teach him how to manage the infinite number of impossible tasks thrown his way.

She'll comfort him. She'll tell him that in no time, he'll be back to his usual job: stress-free and not responsible for saving the nation from a crisis that may result in future generations growing up in poverty and political instability.

She'll hear him out as he rants about the mess Azar and those fuckers ("Language, Al Haitham!") had left him. And how everyone was so reliant on the Akasha terminals and the sages' leadership that when all that disappeared, they were clueless. They can't function anymore. Systems fall apart. People stop working. And because of that, he has to do everything on his own, and he's so tired and-

The sizzling sound has stopped. Is it dinner time already?

But he doesn't want to get up. Not now. Just ten more minutes, please?

There's a faint scraping sound. A spatula against a wok. If he tries hard enough, he can hear a plopping sound. So, it's a stew. He hopes it's Sabz Meat stew. That's his favourite.

How long has it been since he had a homemade meal?

Footsteps. Ok, no ten minutes, then. He'll get up.

Wincing, he sits up. His whole body aches. His knees feel sore. That's weird. He hadn't fallen or hit anything, but he feels bruises forming all over his arms and legs.

Trying to adjust to the bright light, Al Haitham slowly opens his eyes. He's in a small living room. Huh, he doesn't remember his grandmother moving. She never had this couch he was resting on either. Or the wooden coffee table in front. Or that many Liyue magazines.

"Ah, you're awake!"

That's not his grandmother's voice. Wait, what did her voice sound like again?

Al Haitham whips his head towards the voice so fast he pulls a neck muscle. Groaning, he reaches for his neck, massaging it before attempting to turn around, slowly this time.

"Hey, relax!"

There's a soft click from behind, and then frantic footsteps. Someone runs around the couch.

It's a woman. Not his grandmother.

Oh.

Oh yeah. Of course, it isn't her.

"Are you feeling alright?"

Hah, what was he doing, dreaming? Someone like him? Dreaming?

"Uh…sir?"

Of course, it isn't her. The dead can't come back to life. He's alone now. He has been for the past decade.

"…sir?"

He'll always be alone. Now, and for the foreseeable future. If he can even ensure that Sumeru still has one.

There's a hot sensation on his face, snapping him out of his thoughts. It's the woman again. This time with a bowl in her hand, holding it right in front of him.

He'd recognise that aroma anywhere. It's Sabz Meat stew.

"Um, I'm not sure what's going on," she says, placing the bowl into his hands. "But why don't you eat first?"

She pulls the coffee table closer towards him and walks back behind the couch to retrieve cutlery from the kitchen and a plate of rice. Laying them on the coffee table, she then sits on the floor, watching him.

"I didn't add lemons, but I can get you some if you want?" she asks when he doesn't move.

A minute passes. Al Haitham can't move. He can't, and he honestly doesn't want to.

What's the point of moving? Everything moves too fast. He'll never catch up. There's too much. There will always be proposals he can't clear in time. A question he can't answers right now. A policy he needs time to understand. Time that he doesn't have. Time that Sumeru can't afford to lose. He'll always be behind. And because of that, Sumeru will fall behind. Because of him.

It's almost funny. Before all this, he had never worried about being behind. He barely worried about anything.

"Come on," she prompts, taking a spoonful of rice and handing it to him when he still doesn't move. "Eat. You'll feel better after you eat."

Al Haitham doesn't have the energy to resist or deny her. Taking the spoon, he dips it into the bowl, letting the rice soak up some of the stew before lifting it to his mouth.

And suddenly, he's 19 again. He's in the dining room, having dinner with his grandmother again. She's lecturing him about spending too much time alone at home. Again.

"You may not understand now, Al Haitham. But there are people out there- good people. People willing to listen, be patient with you, and shoulder burdens with you. Comfort you."

Al Haitham reaches over to scoop another spoonful of rice. His eyes feel funny. So does his nose.

"You are never alone, child. I just want you to know that. "

Am I really?

Then just send one person, please. I'm waiting.

I've been waiting for a long time now.

"And one day, you may find someone that you can bare your soul to-you do have a soul, child. Everyone has one- no, yours isn't as dark as that 'black coffee'."

His vision is blurry now. With hydro. How strange. He chomps down another spoonful of stew. It's delicious. He hasn't had comfort food like this in a long, long time.

Just one sign. Please. I can't do this anymore.

"But until then, grandma is here to stick by you, hm? Until you stop being stubborn and go make friends!" 

The woman shifts in her seat on the floor. In his peripheral, he sees her reach over to a box, pulling out tissues.

She moves closer to him, a little bit hesitantly. But when she realises that he isn't moving away, she gently dabs his eyes with the tissue.

"There, there?" she comforts awkwardly. She then reaches over to pat his back. "It's gonna be ok. Just let it out."

And that's all it takes. It's so weird. Hydro Tears begin to flow freely. He chokes back a sniffle.

She doesn't stop patting his back. The weight of her palm is comforting- almost grounding.

He cries. In the presence of an absolute stranger, he cries ten years worth of tears in a night.

Later on, as he drifts off back into the realm of sleep to the rhythmic pats on his back, Al Haitham wonders if this is what his grandmother meant.

Maybe there really are people that are willing to stand by someone like him.

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