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#hes thinking about his penis (guillermo)
leensor · 2 years
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beansprean · 10 months
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Every Night's Like an Open Frame
A lil sequel to “Waiting on Mr. Right” ;)
Series also on AO3!
(ID in alt and under cut)
ID: 1a. Aerial shot of a parking lot with one car and a single story building with a temporary sign strapped onto it that says ‘open all night’. A permanent sign on a pole out front says 'Arden Heights Dark Bowl' in purple LEDs, several letters burnt out. A speech bubble pops out of the building that says, 'Guillermo!' 1b. Inside, a medium shot of Nandor and Guillermo facing each other in profile, bowling lanes with LED striping in the background. A monitor is hung above them listing their scores up to the sixth frame, showing Nandor at 46 and Guillermo at 52 with two additional strikes in the last two frames. A little cartoon bowling pin appears on screen, saying 'strike!' The entire room is lit with neon green, purple, and red lights. Nandor sweeps his arm toward the scoreboard angrily and shouts, 'Why did you not tell me you were such a skilled bowler?!' Guillermo tosses his arms out and snaps back, 'Because that’s the first question you’ve asked me all night! You’ve only been talking about yourself!' 1c. Shot of Guillermo over Nandor’s shoulder, showing only one other occupied lane a ways behind him. Nandor throws his arms up, fingers curling in a strangling motion, and replies, 'You said asking questions was a first date activity! This is our second!' Guillermo slumps with a tired frown, pointing out, 'Only technically! The getting-to-know-eachother part is continuous, Nandor. You’re not getting to know me at all.' 1d. Reverse shot of Nandor, who crosses his arms and huffily asks, 'Oh, so you are not interested in hearing about my large penis and great vampiric powers?' 1e. Reverse shot of Guillermo, who purses his lips together and glares back, cheeks flushed. 1f. Repeat. Guillermo mumbles through gritted teeth, '…Not the point.' 1g. Medium shot of them both in profile. Nandor leans forward with a triumphant smile, poking his finger at Guillermo’s face, and crows, 'Aha! See? I am providing the necessary information to ensure you will agree to future dates!' Guillermo leans back away from his pointing finger, pouting in embarrassment and glaring to the side. He mumbles back, 'Shouldn’t I get to do that, too?' 1h. Shot from behind Nandor as he whips around to face the viewer, back to Guillermo, a triumphant grin still wide on his face. He says, 'No need!' Guillermo peers suspiciously at him from the background. 1i. Close up of Nandor’s hand as he sinks his fingers into a red 16-pound bowling ball on the return rack, Guillermo visible behind him clutching his own arm and looking mildly confused. Nandor continues, 'I have already decided how I feel about you.' 1j. Close up of Nandor in profile on a bubbly pink background as he holds up the ball in front of his face to inspect it with a serious expression. He says, 'I cannot imagine anything you could say that would make me want you more.' Close up of Guillermo staring at him, eyes wide and sparkling, cheeks flushed, as Nandor continues, 'Or anything that would keep me away.' 1k. Wide shot, bust of Guillermo small in the center, blushing and looking frustrated with himself as he thinks, 'Why is this working for me?' The background is full of dancing red flags. Offscreen, Nandor continues, 'But very well.' 1l. Shot over Guillermo’s shoulder as Nandor turns to face him with a grin, one hand on his hip and the other holding up a peace sign with the bowling ball held up on his fingers. He says, “Whomever hits the most little white men-“ Guillermo interrupts, correcting, 'Pins.' Nandor continues, '-on the next turn will have to answer a personal question.' 1m. Full body shot from the lane as Nandor turns toward it and dips to roll the ball with a confident smile and decent form. His bowling shoes do not match his outfit. Guillermo stands behind him in equally ugly shoes, watching.
2a. Close up of the bowling pins as Nandor's ball flies down the lane, knocking down some but not all. 2b. Close up at the scoreboard showing Nandor's score of 4 in frame 7. There are more bowling sounds from offscreen. 2c. Repeat, Nandor's score updates to show a spare as he knocks down the rest of the pins. A cartoon pin appears on screen with a wink and a thumbs up, announcing, 'Spare!' Offscreen, Nandor crows 'Ha!' 2c. Close up of Nandor looking very smug as he turns toward Guillermo and sweeps his arm toward the ball return behind him. He says, 'You're up, Guillermo.' 2d. Medium shot of Guillermo as he takes a green ball and readies it in his hands, squinting back at Nandor who stands behind him. Nandor is still holding his arm out and smiling, though the smugness has faded some in favor of affection as a little pink heart floats around his head. 2e. Close up on Guillermo in profile as he turns himself toward the bowling lane, bringing the ball up to balance in front of his face. His furrowed brow and the neon lightning strike in the background enhance his intense focus. 2f. Full body from below as Guillermo steps forward and takes his shot, form perfect and eyes forward. 2g. Shot of the lane from above as Guillermo's ball immediately veers sharply right and sinks into the gutter. 2h. Further shot of the ball rolling in the gutter down towards the pins. 2i. Close up of the ball falling off the end of the lane with a plunk, leaving all pins untouched. 2j. Close up of Guillermo looking calm and unsurprised, brows raised unconcernedly as the animated pin presses it's gloves hands to its face in shock and shouts 'Uh-oh! Gutterball!' Behind him, Nandor is a picture of shock, arms flying out beside him, eyes bugging, mouth dropped open. He shrieks, 'Wha- Guillermo!'
3a. Medium shot of Guillermo as he turns his back on the bowling lane to face Nandor, one hand on his hip and one eyebrow raised. Offscreen, Nandor stutters, 'That's not- You weren't supposed to-' Slightly pink in the face despite his confident veneer, Guillermo interrupts and asks, 'Now you have to answer a personal question, right?' 3b. Reverse shot of Nandor on a purplish pink background filled with question marks. Nandor frowns and tilts his head, baffled, but replies 'I- I suppose, but-' Guillermo interrupts from offscreen again and says 'Great.' 3c. Wide shot of them both in profile, the bowling alley stretching out behind them. Guillermo steps closer, still holding his confident and unbothered expression, and asks 'Do you wanna go make out in the parking lot?' Nandor's eyes bug out in shock, cheeks flushing purple. 3d. Repeat. Nandor rushes forward to take both of Guillermo's hands in his own and hold them up between them, leaning close and staring with a sweaty and flustered intensity. He replies, 'I was wrong. I am wanting you even more now. Tell me everything about you while we are doing the making out.' Guillermo's face breaks into a silly grin, amused but not uncharmed by this response. 3e. Exterior shot of the bowling alley from above, Guillermo now leaning against the building with Nandor pressed against him as they make out. Guillermo's right arm is around Nandor's waist and his left hand is pressed to the wall above by Nandor's. Dialogue drifts down the screen as they canoodle. Guillermo: 'Mmm, but I never went to art school or anything, it's just a hobby.' Nandor: 'I would love to see your work... Would you draw me, too?' Guillermo: 'Maybe...if you'd pose for me.' Nandor: 'However you want, Guillermo... Oh! You can roll your tongue? So can I!' Guillermo: 'Hahaha!' Nandor: 'You are full of surprises...' Guillermo: 'You have no idea...' The neon sign above them takes up most of the panel; more letters are now burnt out to spell 'The End.' /end ID
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gerandor · 1 year
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Everyone calls nandor the oblivious one but nandor was dropping hint after hint that he loves guillermo and wants him to stick around and doesn’t really want to get married to anyone who isn’t guillermo and wants guillermo to be with him everywhere he goes and wants guillermo to dom the shit out of him and it’s guillermo that he thinks about every time he uses his penis and yet guillermo didn’t notice any of these hints at all.
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shamebats · 2 years
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While everyone is re-discovering that Nandor is in fact still a moron of an undead warlord who takes what he wants and leaves devastation in his path (shocking), I'm gonna go against the grain and keep playing in my own little sandbox like the lil meta goblin I am.
Let's look back at Guillermo this season so far.
Guillermo is probably my favorite character and he's my blorbo and I would die for him but this episode really highlighted what his main moral failing is: he's the enabler who stands by when others get harmed.
He stood by as Nandor fucked with his resurrected ex-spouses and helped him plan his wedding to a brainwashed Marwa. When he did properly address how Nandor had been treating her, he only did it because it was now affecting him and his relationship. He never cared about Marwa, just like he doesn't care about any other human victims.
He didn't step in and end it when Laszlo & Nadja were pushing Colin as a child performer, even after saying he would be a good parental figure and keep him safe.
The money he stole and use to buy himself nice things was technically mostly earned by Colin. As soon as he stopped performing, the club started failing and the money stopped coming in. Sure, Guillermo probably used some of it to buy stuff for Colin too, but did he put anything aside? Maybe he did, we don't know. We sure know he bought himself nice designer clothes and an expensive-ass Rolex.
Don't get me wrong, what Nandor and Freddie did to him this episode was horrible and humiliating, I'm not excusing that. They're still fully at fault for how they betrayed him. But it did kind of come back to bite Guillermo in the ass - the way he never intervened when Nandor was using Marwa like a prop. If he'd stopped that in its tracks at the beginning, which I think he might've if he'd gotten involved any other time than just with the penis wish, a lot of bad shit could've been prevented.
He's always been like this, he looks the other way when the vampires do horrible shit, which does make him responsible just like how he's assisting with all the murders
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mulderscully · 2 years
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i think part of the disconnect a lot of the wwdits fandom has is misunderstanding the genre until now. wwdits a horror show. comedy and horror often go hand in hand. jennifer’s body is a prime example of this. it's comedy, but it's still horror.
i have seen a lot of people say “from marwa’s perspective, this is a horror show.” even before freddie aired, and while that is true - it’s true for everyone on the show who is not our main cast. think about how the sound guy LITERALLY got eaten alive. think about how terrifying that must have been for the rest of the crew. think about the virgins guillermo lures to the house. think about the old woman nadja gaslit after literally torturing her as a child. think about laszlo being jack the ripper. think about nandor killing all 36 of his other wives before choosing marwa. that was objectively awful, but we laughed ONLY because of the framing.
that’s what makes wwdits so compelling. it’s all about framing. that's why freddie was hard to watch. the framing changed, not the characters behavior.
so much vampire media is really told through a christian lens. so much is vampires hating being a vampire and finding it to be a curse because they are evil. wwdits is special because it doesn't do that. sure, nandor sees being a vampire a curse now - but it's not because he thinks it's wrong or immoral - but because he has no bitches. he's just lonely! the vampires like being vampires, they like being evil and they revel in it.
yes, i fully expect nandor to grow in the sense of treating the people he loves with more respect and be less emotionally repressed with them, but he's always gonna be a monster if you look at him objectively because he always has been one even as a human.
the same applies to guillermo, and that is why highlighting how monstrous guillermo is as a human is important. their relationship would never work if nandor has to stop being a monster in order for guillermo to want him. guillermo likes him evil, guillermo not only is alright with murder and stood by as nandor brainwashed marwa, he actively participates in the murders AND the fucked up wedding.
he just wants nandor to treat him and their relationship with respect. they're both selfish and codependent and awful to people who are around them. they deserve each other. it's so important to also look at guillermo objectively and embrace how he is a very fucked up person. they're both fucked up and will continue to be so, just not to each other. you have to understand the context.
i do genuinely think nandor will probably undo all of his wishes in s5 (goodbye 20% extra penis) but that will be because he will have realized he loves guillermo and his wishes hurt who he loves and damaged their relationship, not because he is ever gonna be a "good" person. he doesn't care about marwa and he never will, but it is important that the narrative should - which is what i hope for later on. but what nandor did is not ooc or worse than anything he has ever done. the difference is that this time he realized he was wrong because his love for guillermo is that strong.
and that's fun. that's interesting. because it's not how vampire media and romance is usually handled.
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ev-belknap · 9 months
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Wwdits s4 rewatch in preparation of S5, last one.
Yup, this one is going to be all about Freddie.
- First of, Kayvan and Harvey’s performances in this one are absolutely astounding. They both really went 150%, and I adore them for it.
- Guillermo lies a LOT to Freddie. And he lies in a very easy, practiced way. None of the hesitation or caught out faces we sometimes get when it involves his housemates. This is Guillermo’s scheming persona, and I don’t think he fully realises it.
- likewise, Freddie is not a sincere person. He’s a pleasant person, yes, but not sincere. The way both Freddie dates go is very telling: a relationship is formed by two people, yet the long term date looks identical to the freshly minted one. It’s all about Freddie, and he comes over so fake in both.
- Nandor, notably in season 4, has been listening more to Guillermo. Really listening. Down in the basement when fetching baby Colin, at the market, concerning his penis, the wedding… and now here. He is visibly upset Guillermo is upset. And then! He tries. To fix it. He tries to fix it badly, sure, because he’s still Nandor, but he tries. When have we ever seen Nandor give up anything he wanted for someone else?
- More Freddie insincerity: Nandor at the train station mentions how Freddie always wanted to travel, implying he paid attention within his brief relationship. And what is Freddie’s only response? The same roomba joke.
- Guillermo tells Freddie ‘I love you’ twice. Freddie only says it to his own clone.
So yes, GOOD RIDDANCE Guillermo you deserve better sweetie ❤️ Freddies, kindly go drown in an electrocuted backyard pond.
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boingopilled69 · 2 years
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okay so who else can’t stop thinking about nandor thinking of guillermo every time he uses his penis what the fuck (i drew this before the new episode)
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ineffably-human · 2 years
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Mildly obsessed with how they're throwing out repeated 'hints' of Guillermo's sexuality the way they would have on shows in the late 2000s or something, back when it was more rare to have a queer character. Except it's something most of the audience already knows, and it's this show, where Laszlo casually invited Nandor to plow him as he plowed his wife and Nandor's horniest moments during the Bachelor montage were with male-presenting people.
But we also have Guillermo being super close-mouthed about the fact that he's dating a guy, and having a 'shrewd and insightful mind for the penis stuff', definitely seeming interested in what Nandor is packing. And Laszlo, of all people, loudly proclaiming that it's every young man's dream to do something like seduce the Guide, "what's the matter with you? it works, doesn't it?"
Like we could get the reveal that Guillermo's somewhere on the ace spectrum, but I think we've got enough hints he's interested in sex with the right person. (Though if I'm wrong that'd be fucking awesome too, an ace fat Mexican ultra-badass? A homoromantic asexual slow burn as the vampire fuck mansion's featured OTP? Hell yeah.) I think it's just a very, very interesting way of highlighting how he's just that compartmentalized, just that private in his sexuality even now, and the problems he'd still run into back in the family he came from. That a lot of people obviously still deal with all the time.
But now he's healing his own neglected and unsupported childhood stuff through being surrogate parent to Colin. And both literally and metaphorically helping to repair a home up around his chosen family. And it's all just genius. I'm so excited for what this season is going to bring.
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captainmilf · 2 years
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I've become so desensitized to the kind of shit wwdits pulls, I was explaining the plot of 4x03 to my sibling like "So basically Nandor makes a wish to a djinn, which is like a genie, to have a bigger penis so he could better please his fiancé in bed but he accidentally said something before the wish was grated and now every time he uses his new big dick he thinks about Guillermo and-" and then I realized I sounded fucking insane.
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lord-of-the-ducks · 2 years
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Ok, if you haven’t seen the new trailer for episode 3, go watch that. It’s on YouTube on the FX channel, and it’s only about 30 seconds.
Spoilers ahead:
So, Nandor says that he wants the Djinn to give him the world’s biggest penis to improve his relationship with his fiancée, and I think that’s REALLY telling.
It’s already obvious that Nandor is trying to find the perfect bride who will make all of his problems go away. I’ve seen a bunch of people point out that he basically wants his partner to have literally no flaws, and that Marwa isn’t necessarily his true love, she’s just the last one standing. If she really was his true love, he probably wouldn’t be interrupting her and asking the Djinn to change her appearance.
But I think Nandor’s perfectionism is going to go beyond micromanaging Marwa, and he’s going to start holding himself to impossible standards. Because if his relationship with Marwa isn’t working (which it probably won’t), he’s probably going to start blaming himself. It’s going to start out harmless, with silly stuff like “maybe my dick isn’t big enough”, and the Djinn is an easy solution to that, but I can see this going in a very dangerous direction very fast and I’m legitimately worried for Nandor. You could make the argument that Nandor was specifically insecure about his penis after the events in s3e9 when the other vampires were calling it average, and I can only imagine what other insecurities he’s going to blame for his failing relationship.
Anyway, I’m contractually obligated to put a Nandermo spin on this by pointing out that Guillermo was by Nandor’s side even at his worst, and he went out of his way to defend Nandor’s dick in that same episode where everyone was calling it disappointing
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Theory time bitches
to begin with I need everyone to know that I strongly feel like Marwa is gonna leave Nandor at the aisle, runaway bride style. it’s What She Deserves, okay? and Nandor doesn’t feel anywhere NEAR close to realising he’s an oblivious idiot himself.
anyway ep 8 is titled Freddie which as we know is Guillermo’s boyfriends name. (that is literally the only leak I know and all I know about that leak bc I’ve been avoiding them as much as possible, so please tag any reblogs w more leaked info appropriately <3). I feel like Guillermo brings him around to introduce to everyone before the wedding, given he’s gonna be the best man so Freddie wouldn’t be able to sit w him through the ceremony.
Nandor, obviously, is gonna freak the FUCK out but not realise why. like he stares at Freddie with a vitriolic hatred every time they’re on screen together. he’s low key trying to kill Freddie but it’s NOT because he’s dating Guillermo, ok? It’s for other reasons 100% the fucking guy was acting ~shady~. Marwa is in the background of this episode, continually trying to get Nandor to focus back on the last minute wedding prep, but he’s too busy having a gay crisis protecting his dearest friend Guillermo from the evil, evil man he’s chosen to date.
marwa, through this, realises what every other sane person in the world knows, especially after the penis wish catastrophe. she tries to have a conversation with nandor about it, but gets completely brushed off. ep 9, the wedding, has her internally debating on whether or not she should go through with it. she does a talking head interview about it, and as she speaks she realises how shittily nandor has been treating her. He’d run out of wishes at some recent point, had a freak out about it (possibly during Freddie ep? tried making wishes where Guillermo and Freddie would break up), and she thinks back to random appearance changes & thought changes she’s had since coming back to life. and that is why she doesn’t show up to the wedding
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beansprean · 1 year
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As much as I go on about Nandor's emotional constipation he has NOTHING on a 17th century British aristocrat.
My Familiar's Ghost part 24
Masterpost
ID: 1a. Close up on Laszlo flinching back with a frown and eyes darting away as Colin asks from offscreen, “That’s what I called you, right?” 1b. Reverse shot of Colin, Laszlo asking from offscreen, “I…do you…remember?” Colin, uncharacteristically serious, holds his glasses up in front of his face and stares through the lenses as if searching for answers. He replies, “Sort of? Some of it. But it’s all fuzzy.” 1c. Wide shot, Colin standing with his back to the viewer, leaning heavily on the hand braced on the back of his chair as the other slips his glasses back on. He continues, “Like it happened decades ago.” Laszlo, in profile, stands with his thumbs shoved anxiously into his waistcoat pockets. Appearing to have trouble looking directly at Colin, he just says “Oh…” 1d. Repeat. Colin straightens, removing his hand from the chair, and turns his head toward Laszlo with a grin. He asks, “Did I draw a penis on Guillermo’s head?” Laszlo barks out a laugh, eyes closed, and confirms, “You did, indeed.” Colin giggles back. 1e. Repeat. Colin looks away again, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head with one hand. Laszlo continues looking anywhere but him, fingers twiddling and tapping around in his pockets as they both stand in a heavy silence.
2a. Close up on Colin in profile, once again turning toward Laszlo with a serious expression. He starts, “And you…” 2b. Reverse shot, Laszlo in profile as Colin continues from offscreen, “…took care of me?” Laszlo manages to look his way, not without a little pain, and points out “…I did tell you that bit.” 2c. Wide shot in profile. Colin tosses out a careless hand and replies, “Yeah, I kinda figured it was a joke. I googled it later thinking I missed out on some dank memes, but all I found were parenting blogs and a weird baby manual that looked like it was made by IKEA.” Laszlo pinches the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger, eyes squeezed shut. 2d. Repeat. Colin continues, “I ended up posting some of those ideas to the aforementioned parenting blogs and got a real talking to-“ Laszlo releases his nose and chops his hand firmly through the air, snapping, “Colin.” He is stern but his mouth cannot help forming a fond smile. Colin echoes the smile and stops draining, saying “Right, sorry, bad time.” /end ID
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buttlet · 2 years
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ok last post about the latest wwdits ep for a while i just have to say it
am i the only one who thought the djinn was giving MAJOR sarcasm when he was talking about tricking his ‘masters’?? maybe it’s just me being neurodivergent but i thought he was being sarcastic, and genuinely doesn’t care enough to fuck w people like that
that being said i am eagerly waiting for the inevitable outburst where marwa’s like ‘nandor face it!! you have feelings for guillermo’ and nandor denying it ruthlessly and being like ‘no i don’t!!! the djinn tricked me into thinking of him every time i use my new big penis!!!’ and the djinn just being like ‘…..no i didn’t…’ and then nandor finally FINALLY connects the dots
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envyadams-vs-me · 2 years
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Okay people! What did we think?
Personally I loved getting to see more Marwa, she's so precious!
Guillermo losing his shit was, as always, *chef's kiss*
Nadja and The Guide gal-pal-ing (being girlfriends!!)
The Guide having been in love with Nandor and Marwa
Nandor, seemingly, regretting the wish he made for Marwa to like everything he likes
Nadja and Laszlo's song about the wedding night
Laszlo telling Nandor to invite Sean and Charmaine (?)
- I'm interested to see what Nandor does with his 3 new wishes
- I need more Nadja and Guillermo
- Baby Colin Robinson and the Dollie Nadja being chaotic besties is everything
- obviously all the nandermo moments we got, especially, "If you get afraid, I'll be right next to you."
- Nandor covering up the penis on Guillermo's forehead and lulling him back to sleep
This episode was fucking hilarious and I'm excited and anxious to see where we're going
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mulderscully · 2 years
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earlier i was thinking about nandor using one of his last 3 wishes to become human again and then he runs up to the djinn a few days later all angry like, "you messed with my wish!!! everytime i see guillermo now my new feeble human heart starts to race like i have been running 200000 miles!! this is like the penis wish all over again 😡" and the djinn is like? my guy i have not messed with any of your wishes....
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to be fair guillermo helped him design that wish dick and he probably assumes guillermo took a peak (ya know on account of memo being obsessed with him and all that) so he really doesn't need to remind him of it. if he was that desperate day one of guillermo hanging out with lazslo instead of him i'd have to worry
Hi!
There is a lot of evidence against it:
-Nandor offered a peek, but Guillermo refused;
-Guillermo is a prude person, I don't think Nandor undresses in front of him on a day-to-day basis. Occasionally Nandor gets naked in public, but Guillermo had shortly time living with Nandor since that Djinn wish;
-Guillermo would have confronted Nandor since he knows the consequences of the wish;
-Laszlo didn't mention anything about a huge 🍆 either, a strong sign he didn't get to ride that thing;
Having said that, I might as well add that if I had been at a pride parade and seen the biggest penis in the world, I would have commented on something, but nobody said a single thing and Lord knows that my people doesn't hold their tongue 😂
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