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pettyprocrastination · 2 years

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The first time Eddie says he loves you is freshmen year when you order him a meat lover's pizza.

He’s still asleep, sprawled out on the couch in a way you know must be uncomfortable but he slumbers on through the phone call and the door opening. Only waking once you gently shake him and set a plate on his lap. He looks around for a moment, still disoriented as he squints at the plate before slowly picking it up and then bringing the pizza to his mouth with a hum. Mumbling a “I fuckin’ love you man” with a mouthful of food as you sit down next to him.

He says it often, after that. Each time you cover a bill, help him study, or race to the Hideout to hand him whatever equipment he had forgotten back at the trailer.

Each time he picks you up or rents a movie is done with a dramatic frown lined by his voice huffing. “You’re lucky I love you, you know that?”

But he doesn’t truly say it until senior year.

When your friendship had become more. After shared woes of lacking romance and desire on the night of homecoming turned into wandering hands and cautious kisses with “is this okay” mumbled against skin that turned into matching hickies hidden under his hellfire t-shirt and the creaking of bed-springs in his trailer damn near every night. It turns into that black lipstick he loves so much smeared against his neck as you straddle his lap and curl your fingers in his hair.

It isn’t until he’s snapping his hips against yours, fucking into you on a random Thursday night, so delirious on the feeling of your soft cunt gripping his cock and your lips against his that he moans out “I’m in love with you” without realizing he had said it out loud.

It isn’t until he feels your hands twitch and you pull away to ask “wait, what did you say?” that he his heart drops.

Tears brim in his eyes as he stutters out excuses as a rapid fire speed.

He didn’t mean to.

He was just kidding.

He didn’t say anything.

You misheard him.

Anything to save it. Save the relationship. The friendship that he spent years wishing would become more but never acted on because he’d rather you be his best friend than not in his life at all. The one he didn’t want to fuck up just because he was a lovesick fucking moron who didn’t know how to keep his mouth shut and now he’s scared you off for good.

But then your hands reach out and cup his face, thumbs wiping away his wears as you lean forward until your bare chest is pressed against his and Eddie realizes then you’re crying too.

“Say it again?” You ask him. That voice he’s laughed and sang with, pleading to him in a tone so soft and broken his heart bleeds. “Please, Eddie?”

Eddie Munson holds you with trembling hands as he tells you he’s in love with you, and finds ecstasy when you say it back.

Now, the Freak of Hawkins does not only say he loves you. He announces it. Every day he drops you off he hollers it out of the van window with an accompanied honk of his horn, he screams it into the mic of a dingy bar with only three patrons, including yourself, watching him play with his band. He mumbles it into your ear as his hands creep up your waist in a setting entirely too public for him to be so confident in sharing this affection. He moans it against your neck at night, crying it out each time you ride his cock and each morning when you have to pull his head away from your cunt beneath the bed sheets with a wet grin before getting up to make breakfast.

It’s his greeting, his goodbye, his melody and his battle cry. Days may come where you feel exhausted and desperate, but never do you feel unloved.

#tj talks #dont look at me i burst wrote this its not even edited i jusr wanted to write some eddie and throw it to the voice #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x yn #also peep the black lipstick mention because MORE EDDIE WITH ALT BITCHES #this post is brought to you by the thought that eddie is so full of love and starved for affection that #he def gets off to you saying you love him #sorry yall im still horned up for this man and will be so for the future #anyways childhood best friends to friends with benefits because yall are in love my beloved #sorry for the randome ddie munson smut but IM #this is probably riddled with spelling errors and misformating but hey take this #wasn't sure if this was long enough for a read more or not so please let me know if you'd like me to add one!

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trainingdummyrabbit · 3 months

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What do you think of aroace spectrum angela or like. any variant idk

REAL AND TRUE AND CORRECT. NOT TAKING ARGUMENTS AT THIS TIME <3

like. ok ive definitely spoken abt it offhand sometime before so im just going to use this opportunity to aimlessly ramble ok? ok. hyperfixation trap card.

like yeah theres the whole 'only having rep thats robots and aliens and etc' thing which is very much a fair and appropriate response, but also like. at a point you Do just kinda have to go 'Man Just Look At Her.'

i certainly couldnt say it as well as other folks, but... Man Just Look At Her. theres so many threads that are Literally Right There, its kinda hard Not to. id have to study again n cite my sources or whatever but also this is my house. ok.

like theres the obvious 'i see you as a friend' interaction with her and roland sometime mid-to-late ruina, which is. again. Its Right There. but its also the way she looks in lobcorp, and the instant she gets any agency she immediately veers in a completely different direction. (as a reclamation of self, as another small rebellion, as an exploration of how She would like to present herself and be seen)

its that interaction with xiao, her genuine confusion towards the concept of lovers, what they are, what makes it so different from any other sort of person. (as a jab towards her own isolation, the values she was made to uphold, her unfamiliarity towards cityfolk and the ways they carry themselves-- and that seeming contradiction of that affection vs. the way she was told cityfolk Work.)

angela, to me, feels like the type of character to simply Be. for lack of a better term. its a difficult concept to Describe in a way that makes sense, (despite me being, how do you say, In The Same Boat.) its something i could see her toss around out of curiosity, but honestly just... not really care for. she has things to do.

like... angela is just. a very cut and dry character, to put it in a way. she just kinda states things as they are, sometimes rather bluntly. its hard to elaborate because things simply Are. plain and simple, no need to fuss over it. and thats what this feels like itd be, yknow?

also iam just shrimply. forever an angela+roland qpr truther. tbh. like i dont know what the Hell those two have going on but you literally Cannot separate them. i hesitate to call it 'love,' because. well yes, but also no. but also kind of? but not quite. again, it just Is. they simply Are.

its one of those things that just feels Odd seeing her in any other context, in regards to romance or whatever. which is tied to a whole slew of other problems only tangentially related to the subject (shipping content bias, character simplification, and so on and so on,) but its just... man she would Not fucking say that. she would not Do that, she would not Act that way.

like i certainly believe it Is possible to have romantic interpretations with her, but its gonna be. Specific. with the way she carries herself, how she acts, and how she reacts to things. even with the romantic elements, itd still dip into aro experience territory, if you know what im saying. like whoever it is, this shit isnt going to fit into Roles and Archetypes, like how a lot of folks like to write ship content. for lack of a better descriptor, its gonna be Weird.

and thats honestly whats so frustrating about it! you Can have an interesting through-line and interpretation of that sort of thing, but a lot of the time whenever i (rarely) see it, its just... Typical Beauty Standards, Hot Secretary Lady, Scary Controlling Whatever the hell like... i hate t judge but cmon guys we can do so much better than that. ironically, wheres the Love? the respect for who she is, the curiosity on exploring that sort of thing with who she Is? guys come On...

which. grain of salt, because its not like i search out ship content, yknow. im not gonna speak like an authority for stumbling onto stuff sometimes. the fact that it isnt so popular and in-your-face is genuinely refreshing honestly, but. tangent.

anyway arospec angela agenda never sleeps and iam one of the strongest soldiers. the ace is Non Negotiable come back later with a warrant so i can Not Look At It. (<- this is a bit. (<- but im serious.)) thankyou. bows.

#pikasks #long post #projmoon #GRAHH iwanna be so much more formal and eloquent about this but iknow i wont be JSNGKJDNGK #tried t keep it concise atleast. ohwell \o/#anyway whenever i see like. even remotely suggestive stuff with her it just feels. rude. almost. for lack of a better term.#like it could be my repulsed-ace ass over here talking but like... hey man cmon :( come on.#Especially with the lc design bit like. that makes me wanna chew on fucking drywall and i am not powerful enough to dig into it yet.#i dont talk abt her in a 'nooo shes so innocent and sweet she doesnt know she doesnt get it oh nooo :((' way #but theres definitely this like. raises eyebrow. bit about it. like live and let live but also Are We Reading The Same Text......#oh also binah. shes th one i went 'oh! yeah ok :)' with in terms of less-strictly aro interp. but id need t read more to explain. orz #but ive yapped on enough; you get it; look at it its on the ceiling. ok 👍#anyway the struggles of being a pleasure!angela enjoyer

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deeva-arud · 4 months

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Boo!

I'm the paranormal activity on your dash :]

#Udi posting in 2023? truly a christmas miracle #Now it'd be pretty funny if everyone seeing this collectively thought 'who the hell is this person?' I mean. UNDERSTANDABLE-#I've been gone for so long I don't even recognise this dash layout help??#Excuse me while I have a grandma moment trying to figure out where things are #Anyway I don't have much to post since I've barely drawn in all these months. So many art blocks stacked on top of more art blocks #(among other things)#BUT I still have some drawings here and there. Not the best I've ever produced but hey it's something #and you know what happens when Udi has an art block? Exactly. Cateeva content (and silly drawings) (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧#Now it's time for me to fill my room with sticky notes reminding me to take things easy #you'll have to bear with my slowness for a little bit longer. Life hit me hard recently and everything feels so heavy to me #but I just didn't want to let this year pass without saying anything...#I actually missed being on here. If I see art or an oc from any of my moots I'll probably cry on the spot #Moot reading this you've been warned (🫶)#I'll shut up now. I really hope everyone's doing as good as they can. This is such an awful world #Udi talks

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impossibletruths · 3 months

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the post-apocalypse genre 🤝 the western

the search for a garden of eden can never be achieved (but we look anyway)

#the unfortunate thing about grad school is that suddenly I'm reading everything through the lens of ''could I write a paper on this''#and it's annoying as shit. I don't wanna write papers I don't care about publishing I just wanna talk about this with my friends #I wanna lead a discussion with a bunch of 19 y/os and be like ''hey what do you think about this??'' and let 'em go wild #gradposting #ish #for later

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msbhagirathi · 17 days

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IPKKND LIVE BLOG - Season 1 [Epi - 2]

Cooooommmmmmmeeee ooooooonnnnnnnn, letz start the second epiiiiiiiiii.

So we are starting right from where we had left them off. ANDDDDD BAAAAMMMM! Khushi jolts out of her (or rather their?) trance and realizes where her hand is, snatches it back. Pulling out Arnav from his trance as well.

I want you to focus on their expressions in the scene. Look closely, when she snatches her hand away from his collar. His gaze, instantly falls down to her hand and there's a moment where he steels himself and maybe even thinks that 'How dare she!'.

It's as if Arnav realizes that he needs to be angry and THEN all hell breaks lose, as he throws her out of his hands. He orders the head of his PR team to control the photos and videos of this 'scandal'. Khushi is locked in a room for interrogation.

Back in Gomti Sadan, the neighborhood aunties are gossiping about Khushi's absence. Buaji asks about the papers' whereabouts to Payal. But, Payal, already very nervous and tongue-tied, reduces to tears. I am surprised why did Buaji not see the change in her demeanor and most importantly her spilled tears. But, that's also not much surprising coz Buaji can hardly ever read Payal or Khushi's distress over anything that they seem to be facing alone, in the entire show. This scene also indicates that Payal has never been the rule-breaker kid, she's always been kind of a 'yes-man' to her parents.

Ohh! Did you notice how Khushi's voice sounds so off? Do you know why? Turns out Sanaya was sick with cold while shooting this sequence. She mentioned this in that interview with Mrs. Gul Khan, which was released right after IPK ended a few months ago.

Arnav instructs the team to interrogate Khushi and check whether a rival company (Re-Fashion? RI-Fashion? REE-Fashion? whatever, lol.) send her there to ruin his fashion show in exchange of some petty amount of money.

Payal's belief, of her Abhishek ji standing up to his family's demand of the dowry, breaks. She realizes that he is present there, knows everything going on but still refuses to speak up. She is heart-broken.

Was it only me or you also thought that the way Sanaya pronounced 'profession' is kind of-idk-intriguing?-sexy?-hot?-pata nahi choro (ok, leave it.)

Garima tries to associate the papers' absence to Khushi's absence. Payal has been caught like a deer caught in headlights.

Arnav comes to meet or rather to interrogate his wife 'that' girl, for 'answers'. Khushi requests him to let her go as she explains him that she landed there by mistake.

He is so adamant in throwing all the unfortunately familiar 'accusatory' questions. What was that 'Wipro-Fashion'? 'PRO-Fashion'? Whatever. See, many of you would disagree, here, but I think he is legit right in doubting her intentions, given the type of people he would have dealt with till now in this profession. Although, WE know, from Khushi's POV, that she is right, BUT that's the thing, he doesn't.

"Then let it (the marriage) break. Problems like these are nothing for girls like you. If one leaves, then trap another." ("Toh tut jaane do shaadi. Tum jaisi ladkiyon ka kya hai. Ek jayega, dusra phasaa lena.") And the BG score changes to something close to tandav beats. Maybe, just maybe he realized that he has struck a chord or crossed a line or fcked up real bad. It can be any of the three.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh! The dreaded moment is here. Khushi retaliates but she does not realize the volcano in front of her, ready to burst out with hot, molten lava. She attempts to side step him but he grabs her by the arm and yanks at the dori of her blouse. Pearls scatter around, everywhere on the floor. Khushi is horror struck, devastated, horrified and all the girls watching this for the first time already knew what that meant. And hated Arnav for doing that to her for a long, long time.

See the irony, here. In the previous episode, we saw them together in that beautiful frame. No-one had any doubt of them being the alpha couple of the show. BUT. BUT. BUT.

After this scene, audience must have doubted, some might even have gone to the extent to declare Arnav as the villain. And later considered Shyam as the hero, coz of the way, he was introduced (we will come to that in that episode).

Hmm. I am thinking. Why did he let her go? Like? So....easily? After she pulled the ribbon from her hair and covered her exposed back, or rather her modesty. Arnav has frozen. At his spot. He isn't even moving a finger. (I will have to process this scene and then will let you know in a separate post.)

With this, the scene blurs and along with Khushi, we reach Gomti Sadan, where everything is eerily silent. Wait. Did we reach so early? Didn't Khushi take the whole day to reach SM? Then how come- ohh Guilty Arnav might have arranged a car for her to reach her home safely-Lol. Who am I kidding with? This is ASR, we are talking about. Let's stop with the wishful thinking.

Gomti Sadan. Gossips. Malign in their social image. A broken marriage. All of these are termed as a "Kali' (black ink) by Buaji. And who's at fault? Khushi. She talks of pulling off her braid and handing it to her. Basically, beat her ass off.

Buaji, I think, was never able to accept Khushi as her own child. She was always the only one to differentiate between the two. She was only the one who instigated Garima and Shashi against her. Although, Shashi had wholeheartedly accepted her as his daughter but Garima, often used to get manipulated into believing the worst, in Khushi.

Even now both Buaji and Garima are convinced that Khushi was, somehow, jealous of her sister's fate (that she was getting married) and so to malign it, she decided to sabotage the wedding by taking away the papers and fleeing out of everyone's sight until the wedding is called off.

Lol. Junior Engineer. And Buaji thinks, that's self-explanatory for them, having a right to ask for a dowry. Khushi explains herself. But, she is admonished by her (B-ji), for acting like a 'Dadi Amma', means trying to act above her age, by interfering in elders' matters.

Still, for the Guptas', specifically for Mrs. Garima Gupta, a broken marriage is worse than Payal getting married into a money-hungry family. Do you see it here? Getting MARRIED is of more importance than getting married into THE RIGHT FAMILY.

And as if all this admonishing and insulting is not enough, so, she kind of disowns her daughter. "Mat kaho hume Amma".

Khushi, who already had abandonment issues, guilt of being a burden to 'this' family, is now shell shocked. Someone please save this poor kid.

Buaji does it again! Hip, hip hurray guys! She again pulls up the orphan card and a non-refundable debt (of getting adopted by her brother and sister in law) card! What an awesome timing Buaji! Shut up Buaji. What? Shashi said this. Not me. I have manners, ok.

"Arre tujhse saga humara koi nahi hai." Payal's words calms Khushi to some extent. But, they are still not enough as we see that Khushi cannot sleep, and keeps tossing and turning, recalling her amma's harsh words.

She wakes up and opens their shop's door. Khushi is shown handling an LPG gas cylinder, an oil cannister and lighting a match stick, giving us the impression of her attempting to give up her life.

Precap starts. *quickly pauses it* I don't watch precaps. Spoilers. Don't like them. Bye. Such a stressful episode to watch.

youtube

P.S. : Remember the interview I was talking about? This is it. Please do give it a watch if you haven't already. It's so beautiful them sharing the off-screen things and being all nostalgic. You'll love it. :)

Next Episode!

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saint-gerard-of-arc · 21 days

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if you still do these 48 + vinikki pls pls pls i’ll love you forever

“So…” began the butler, as he extracted the sword out of its scabbard, making the sunlight bounce on the sharp blade, “shall we begin your training, Vincent?”

Vincent pulled out his weapon as well. “That’s master Wharton to you now, Nicholas.” The young man snickered, as he gripped the hilt with both hands. A flash of rage and determination lit up his hazel eyes as he slowly but confidently made his way towards his servant, who began walking forward too.

As much as Nicholas saw Vincent's birth and always took good care of him, they despised each other. Well, at least Vincent hated Nicholas, that’s for sure. There was something about the way the butler treated him like a child, despite being well over that phase of his life, that got on Vincent’s nerves.

But today, the day of his 21st birthday, would’ve been the day Vincent showed him, and everyone else, what he’s made of, he would’ve shown the man he had become.

“Oh come on, Vince,” grinned the older man, raising his sword. “we’re friends by now, aren’t we?”

“No, we’re not.” Responded the blond nobleman, through gritted teeth. The nobleman tried to stay calm, to not raise his voice, to not let his adversary win. Nicholas was found by his family when he was still a hungry urchin living in the London slums, so who the hell did he think he was? That day, Vincent thought, his father should’ve minded his business.

They stopped a few inches from each other, with their blades touching, in a guarding position.

“May the best of us win.” Said the butler, flashing his teeth, his green eyes glistening with calm confidence.

“En garde, old bastard.”

The metal clangors quickly followed one another. Whenever Vincent tried to strike, Nicholas was ready to deflect his attacks, almost as if he could predict Vincent’s every move. Slash, slash, lunge. Vincent only managed to cut a strand of the older man’s jet-black hair. Their swords crossed, the blades slipping, and now it was a matter of who was going to get the best of the other. Vince was losing his balance, but he refused to give up. With an effort and a scream of rage, the nobleman pushed away his adversary, making him almost trip on his own feet. Almost. But Vincent had already let his guard down, not having the time to react when Nicholas sweeped his blade, leaving a thin, bloody gash on the young man’s cheek. Vincent held back the hiss of pain.

“Oh, that’s gonna leave a nasty mark!” Snickered the butler.

Vincent decided to ignore him, determined to not get distracted by Nicholas’s babbling. The fact that he got hit even once, it was already one too many. He managed to deflect another blow, but barely. Their swords crossed again, but this time Vincent lost his balance and fell over, making him lose the grip of his weapon.

“Well, well, well.” The butler pointed his sword at the nobleman’s neck. “Rule number one: never let your guard down.”

“Are you gonna kill me…?” Muttered the blond, raising his head ever so slightly, in order to take a glimpse of Nicholas’s face.

The other let out air of his nose in amusement. “It would be very hard to explain your disappearance to your family.” He diverted his armed hand away from the young man, and reached out with the other, to help Vincent get up.

“Right…” said Vincent, a bit hesitant at first to accept his help. “The butler is always the prime suspect.”

The older man let out a hoarse laugh. “Wait here. I’ll go grab some bandages.”

---

“How was I?” Asked Vincent. He didn't know why he wanted to seek Nicholas's approval, yet that question slipped out of his mouth.

“Not bad.” Said the other, concentrating on dabbing the wound with a bandage. "Not bad at all for your first time.”

The blond frowned, both from physical and emotional pain. “I feel like you’re lying to me.”

“I would never. " Responded the butler, calmly. "I mean it.”

"One day I'll be able to defeat you, you'll see." Mumbled the young man. "Then you're finally going to respect me."

Nicholas stopped what he was doing to look at his young master in the eyes. He smiled, thinking that Vincent was just like his father. "Here's the thing," he began, "respect is not given unconditionally, it is earned." He then put a hand on Vincent's shoulder. “This is my gift for you for today: a humble piece of advice. Happy birthday, master Wharton.”

Put That Guy in a SituationTM Ask Game/Prompt!

#witchy's ask booth #nikki sixx #vince neil #vinikki #mötley crüe #witchy writings #hey bestie sorry if this took me so long!!#i may have taken the prompt way too literally lmao but as soon as i read the phrase enemy caretaker i thought of #a master/butler kinda relationship #but they had to be enemies of course #i feel like they're not as in character as i'd like them to be tho. also it feels rushed #idkkkkk i feel like i should've written and analyzed it a bit more. but i know that if i did i wouldve written an entire novel #or i wouldve forgotten about it #oh yeah and the names!! i chose to give them names that would fit the victorian age more so hopefully it doesnt break the immersion??#but i assure you its our nikki and vince im talking about here #also btw the fight is kinda lame i know. i just dont know how to write fights let alone swordfights #anyway i better post this before i overthink this wayyyyy more that i should #i hope you like it <3

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peachypizzicato · 1 year

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The Five Of Cups: An Open Letter to Dorian

Hey everyone! Welcome back to my soapbox (or, if you see this and by some divine happenstance don’t know me: Hi! I’m Felix! Or Anemone. I go by many names.)

As you can tell by my Big Boy Letters, I’m comin’ to talk about kind of a serious subject. At least, it’s serious to me anyway. I wanted to talk a bit about the game The Arcana. You know the one. The definitely not at all divisive one. That Arcana. (/s)

(Warning: I will be touching on depictions of racism, misogyny, anti indigenity, antisemitism, and just general mistreatment of marginalized people!)

TLDR; The Arcana is full of harmful portrayals of marginalized people and the fandom at large ignores it at best and encourages it at worst. The best thing we as the community can do is make it abundantly clear to the company that this is not okay and should not continue.

To be completely upfront here, I’m not going to be going in-depth on every single problem with the devs or the distributors or anything. We’re all busy people and there’s not nearly enough time in the day. But what I am going to do is touch on a few things I’ve witnessed firsthand that I think are worth sharing with the wider community.

One of the behaviors I’ve noticed most often is what I can only think to call… Strange treatment of the love interests. Not by everyone, mind you, but on a startlingly normal basis. Now, what do I mean by “strange”? Well, it really depends on the character honestly.

With Asra, much of the portrayals feel significantly more sexualized than that of their peers. Drawn and portrayed as if their body exists to be ogled by someone else rather than lived in by themself, y’know what I mean? That, combined with blatant orientalist imagery baked into much of their designs, makes for a feeling of feast or famine when seeking out content. And this isn’t even to comment on the intense focus on them as defined by their relationships to others– namely Julian– and all of the mischaracterization that comes with that.

It’s not much different in regard to Nadia, if you can believe it. The image of “step-on-me-queen dominatrix” cultivated by the original writers persists in the community, with overwhelming focus put on her body and her sexuality over anything else. Anyone who’s known me since I discovered the game knows I actually really liked her at first, but it’s hard to have a genuine attachment to a character who seldom even gets to have a personality outside of basic traits and Having Tits.

Julian is, admittedly, a difficult one. I am not jewish myself, but I’ve heard testimony from jewish fans that his portrayal is less than ideal (to put it lightly). At the very base, his design itself is riddled with common antisemitic imagery and was based primarily on a real brown-skinned jewish man whose melanated skin they excluded, surely coincidentally (/s). but it goes even further than that (depicting a jewish man as a bloodsucking vampire, anyone?). I don’t claim to speak for any groups I do not belong to, but with the knowledge I do have it simply makes things uncomfortable to witness.

Muriel. Oh, Muriel. Again, if you’ve known me for any significant amount of time, you probably knew I was dreading this. But as much as I’d like to think nothing could ever be wrong when he’s around, there are definitely problems. Now, I could go into all the issues with the way the writers concocted his route, his story, his character as a whole (brown man with a ~foreign~ type of magic lives in solitude in the woods and is “in tune with nature” to the point of communication, very original /s), what I really want to touch on here is how this informed the way the community treats him. Listen, I’m not gonna sugarcoat this, a lot of Muriel fans are not subtle about their (most often white, but not always) savior complexes. More times than I care to remember I’ve seen him babied, treated like he’s incompetent, made at best into an animal to be tamed and at worst into an uncontrollable monster. I’ve seen pieces of fanfiction call him, a very blatantly indigenous-coded character, a real actual slur. Not to mention how watering down the trauma he faced has become something of commonplace. And this isn’t even an exhaustive list of ways he’s mistreated! For as much as it makes me angry, it’s also extremely saddening. The devs and writers made one of their most genuine kindhearted characters into a metaphorical punching bag, and the community has only continued swinging for years afterward.

But, I think I’ve made my point. Moving on.

Portia is a combination of problems I’ve already touched on. Conveniently, all of the stereotypical traits that Julian inherited happened to skip right over his little sister. What didn’t skip over, however, was the gene of being shamelessly and gratuitously oversexualizing of her. Take a look at any of her CGs; most if not all of them are centered on her chest or otherwise use color and design to draw the eye there. Every one of her sprite outfits are low cut to show varying levels of cleavage. And the few vocal fans she does have only serve to perpetuate this over and over again. To be completely clear, there’s nothing wrong with characters who embrace their sexuality. That goes without saying. However, for being the one “plus-size” love interest– which really in this case only means short and curvy– the emphasis on her body over anything else about her is startling and sad.

Finally, we find Lucio. Our one ethnically white male love interest. You may be wondering how a character like that could possibly receive “strange treatment”. Or maybe you’re not. I will elaborate anyway. The biggest problem with Lucio, with the fans and absolutely with the teams behind the game, is and has been for the longest time the complete and utter lack of awareness of his role in the world and the consistent retroactive rewriting of his character. What I mean by that is this: Lucio, originally and in every route but his own, is blatantly written to be an unforgivably cruel and immoral man. He seeks the best treatment he can get while cityfolk all but die in his streets, he takes advantage of the kindness and generosity of others and punishes their trust. There are many assumptions that can be made but we are shown explicitly that he can know Asra, a child (as an adult himself), and make sexual advances on them in adulthood with absolutely no guilt. He blackmailed Muriel into being and staying his slave and in turn forced him to perform brutal public massacres for an indeterminate amount of time: all we know is that it was long enough for a colloquial name to become well known and for his appearance to grow unkempt and haggard. All this plus more things that I don’t even have the time to list. And yet, he is arguably one of the most popular characters. Take two steps into the fandom at large and you’ll see countless postings about how his childhood was so tragic and how he’s so very sorry, he’s just a little oopsie whoopsie uwu soft boy! The few times I personally have seen his horrible actions even addressed by his fans was to underplay them, to insinuate that he has it worse than anyone he hurt. In spite of, or maybe even because of his extensive list of broadly observable crimes, he thrives in the community. The people love him. I don’t think I really have to explain why this in particular is so extremely chilling to me.

So, with all of these things laid out… What now? We’ve acknowledged the problems, there’s pages upon pages of other posts outlining ones I didn’t even cover here, so now what do we do? What’s the solution?

The answer to this isn’t quite cut and dry. There’s no simple solution to murky waters that run as deep as these do. But, for what it’s worth, I have a few suggestions I’d like to propose.

First off, I understand that all of the routes are finished. They had all completed well before the Dorian acquisition, I’m fully aware of that fact. However, in regard to said acquisition, I feel as though Dorian dropped the ball when transferring the property to their own app (and I’m not even talking about the writing of the tales, which is its own can of worms). Rather than simply copy-pasting the routes from the existing app, things could’ve been redone, remade better. Problems could have been solved now that the game had gained new life. This was much of the inspiration behind my own reworking of the concept, to address the problems and fix them. I don’t even believe that it’s too late for them yet; routes have only just begun being uploaded to the Dorian app, in theory there’s still room to reconsider things.

But that’s the problem. I don’t believe that the crew behind Dorian really cares. I don’t believe the original development team or Nix Hydra crew really cared. If the people involved really cared about these problems, there was ample time within the last nearly five years to fix things. They did nothing. They continue to do nothing. People like me shout endlessly into the void, hoping someone will hear and actually listen to the issues happening within their game. But they don’t care. They continue to make money, they continue to draw in players, why should they? If racism and misogyny and every other form of bigotry under the sun doesn’t hurt their bottom line, why change anything? Why care, why change if the community at large not only ignores it but actively encourages and supports it? Why listen to criticism if you can just block it and soak up praise from your unconditional fans? Why?

As I said, I don’t have a simple solution for any of this. But I’ve made personal choices in my own life to give less of my time and money to the company. If I want merchandise, I seek out independent artists. If I want to see or read something again, I can find screencaps. As much as I miss certain things, I don’t play the game anymore. I can’t help being attached to characters who have been important to me for as long as I’ve known them, but what I can do is make purposeful choices in response to the affection I feel. Maybe my singular actions won’t mean anything to them, but specifically and purposefully refusing to support the profits of a fundamentally flawed game that doesn’t even have the self awareness to be ashamed of itself means everything to me.

Thanks for listening. I hope anyone who happened to make it to this point can take something good from my impassioned ramblings.

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brother-emperors · 2 years

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updated perceval and bors’ designs because this time I flipped through a bunch of visual reference books on knights and armor before picking up my pen to draw them

society6 | ko-fi | redbubble | twitter | deviantart

#you would not believe how much easier it is to draw things like swords and armor when you go thru a visual reference book FIRST not after #i have. PLANS. involving that grail quest. my perceval/bors agenda if you will.#but also they are friends who enjoy hanging out and talking about shit and sparring with each other #but ALSO lets get talking about wounds in arthuriana centric narratives fellas!!! aka my favorite discussion topic to read about #before i do anything with the grail quest i might revist the prose tristan first tho bc tristan and friends is where i like to hang out #drawing tag #knights knights knights!#arthuriana #perceval #sir bors #(hey Cardinal you might ask. if this is about the grail quest where is Galahad?)#(and to that i can only say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)#(listen he's narratively fascinating but represents so much that annoys me on a constant basis like the meta discussion is DELICIOUS but the #actually narrative. euruGUDHGSDUGHGH)

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cantsaythetword · 3 months

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fuuuuuck ive dug myself such a massive hole and there's no climbing out now

#he speaks #love lying to my parents about how my uni career is going #cause i know they would cut me off from EVERYTHING i care about if they find out im failing anything #so just softening the blow by being like hey im barely passing #(which was still a DIFFICULT convo)#and saying oh im struggling heaps keeping up with readings and assignment deadlines so im just doing the bare minimum cause im exhausted #cause adhd #and them wanting to be super helpful and being like oh give me a list of your assignments and their due dates and your readings #and ill read the stuff and look at your assignments #cause you said you were doing summer semester to catch up on your classes from the trip #but in reality youre not you just said that so your parents would let you go #but now youre gonna have to do assignments over the summer break (aka for the next 4 weeks) and then be stressed about getting set up #and now youre so far in that you have an elaborate plan that you've “talked to the academic advisors” about your struggles and your adhd do #and both said you should go part time #so that it looks like youre graduating “on time”#but in reality youre just catching up on the courses you failed #and still struggling and hating full time #i stg if there were ANY other way to get the qualifications i need for this job #i would have left uni after first semester #i actually fuckin hate it #sorry for the rant lmao #kinda a vent post

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searidings · 2 years

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Hey there! Just curious if you’ve stumbled upon any new fanfics that you are loving?

hell yeah babey!!!!

if music be the food of love, play on and also you'll always find your way back home by lovepotionnumber5

also checking for updates on i want something just like this by @jazzfordshire and a history of wine by @seabiscuits-us and the bicep obsessed tennis au by ms huge rack @hrwinter like im checking the morning paper

#ok so. lovepotionnumber5. let's talk about them #if they have a tumblr i dont know it but fuck i'd like to #so they wrote a free solo au that is cinematic as all fuck and flawlessly combines two of my nichest interests #and i think i recced it already but honestly people are SLEEPING on it it's so so good yet so under-kudosed #so i was feeling my feelings today and felt like a reread and then i thought hey. i wonder if theyve written anything else #had a little look. saw another fic #read 'mob boss/jazz singer au' and promptly devoured the fuck out of it and let me just say #i was HOWLING #the funniest fucking dialogue in the world #'it's gonna be may' if you know you know and boy howdy i KNOW #go and read it like. i cannot stress this enough. wip or no wip. go and read jt #if i could eat a fic i would swallow that one whole #the characterisation i swear to god #i want to kiss lovepotionnumberfive's lillian luthor on the mouth #also kara and lena but we already knew that #i am reccing the shit out of this author don't try and stop me #lovepotionnumber5 if you're out there i'd die for you if you ever need it. jsyk #hope you're having a great day #asks #anonymous #my ficrecs

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saltwukong · 11 months

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Bitches will literally tell you a story that they were the villain of.

#rwde #''hey lets vent a little by listing all the ships we dont like for whatever reason'' someone get them help. they really think that's normal #y'all be talking about toxicity and then not even knowing what it looks like.#like iunno what you think toxic shipping behavior is SUPPOSED to look like but it looks like exactly this. that's not cute and normal.#like if just an ordinary group of friends did this? maybe. still sus.#but since you all self-indentified as fans of the same ship it just becomes a united front of haters circle-jerking themselves stupid.#not to mention the actual way this post reads like. girl? that's what you thought would make yourself look rational and other people petty?#like really? your go-to exaggerated example of something nasty or uncouth that someone would rabidly defend shipping is...that?#like obvious question 1) what exactly is wrong with gangbangs lol. sorry that you hate fun.#and obvious question 2) uhhh why when crafting a nominal objectioner did you specify 'black' like.......explain it.#tell me how that was supposed to come off because i don't know why you'd say that and not think 'this sounds really racist' unless.....#the whole wide world full of inc/st r/pe abu/se apologia on top of pe/do shit and the villain in your post is.....#someone shipping a pairing that contains a black man. okay.

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nomazee · 29 days

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nearly wrote an entire paragraphs-long post about misogyny in reader-insert fanfics but i decided to store it away for now... having a moment of clarity... one day i'll have the energy to say everything i need to say

#oh hey guys #at the end of the day everything for me is about being queer and misogyny affected #and i also am watching a video about booktok and how its ruined media literacy #and i was like wait... this happens in fanfiction too... hold on now #and then i started typing out my thoughts because i love yapping on my blog but then i was like oh maybe its not that deep #except it is that deep and it will always be that deep #and YOU the person reading this. you should be critical of everything you read. everything has a depth to it whether you think so or not #im not saying all of your reading and writing needs to be entwined with some kind of commentary or activism #but i think all writing has some kind of meaning to it #and you should think about that maybe #and i hate sounding like an elitist UGH i hope i dont come off as that rn #if someone wants to hear my thoughts let me know! (i get 2 notes on every non-fic post)#i love you all #stay media literate and stay happy #and keep writing and stay online and keep talking #all of u.#nora speaks

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trollbreak · 1 month

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SITS HERE

#been slowly swinging a pendulum between bill and beastly all day #and um. sits on the floor. bill is able to read folks as well as junie she just. doesn’t really know what to do #with that. sees how Ethann and Beastly are and is like. hm. I’m. not fond of the way you grew up. but one of you treats the topic as a live #explosive and the other can’t seem to conceptualize how anything was wrong. she’s like. that’s not right. but the fuck could I do abt it.#she’s just lingering in a room with Ethann while the both of them work on deparate things in silence. they’re very close because of the. the #‘shows trust by being nearby and letting themself not pay attention to u’#like the. the making a point to go hey. you’re not a threat to me. and im available if needed.#bill talks to herself while she works sometimes and when she does Ethann comes over to watch. do u fucking KNOW how Ethann is slowly learnin #abt ships and upkeep from this… bill helping him wash grease out of their fur at the end of the night…. beastly doesn’t live with bill ofc #but he’s a regular visitor and bill makes sure to let him know he’s always welcome… sometimes when he’s feeling particularly unmoored her #house is one of the places he goes to find a room to sit in silence for a few hours. maybe nap till things feel a little more real again.#SIGHS ALL BIG #bill 🤝 junie. shes Ur dad #junie is happy for him to be ur mom #bill never signed up for this shit and is sitting there staring into her coffee going hm. wel shit when did that happen. like she’s Gonna be #a helpful figure but she’s also like. when did that happen?

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wrathfulmercy · 2 months

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Similarities I found in towl about the way I write Rick part 1

Obviously these are all just my opinions and interpretations but I wanted to share them since I write Rick since 2019 now and had all these things in my head before the series even released. Beware! Spoilers for episode 1 underneath the cut! And tw: heavy topics and long text

- Rick mentions his father was a farmer (what I didn’t expect cause I always imagined him being a sheriff or something too) and that he got disappointed by him as he bluntly lied into Rick’s face. He did it to protect the family in his point of view, but Rick was shocked and hurt by the dishonesty. I always imagined Rick’s father as someone who drastically damaged his general trust and “helped” develop Rick’s trust issues and lack of self esteem cause when he couldn’t trust his father, he wonders if he himself is someone to trust or who will sooner or later be like his father and lets people down. (To be fair I imagined his father as a strict asshole xD but that’s just overdramatizing it for writing purposes and cause it fits to my rick)

- At the beginning of the episode Rick tries to kill himself or at least has suicidal thoughts he doesn’t go through with. I always imagined Rick as someone who struggles or struggled with some kind of self harm (simply because I feel so similar to him that it would fit) and that for him it was more or less a blessing as the world fell to change his auto aggression into external aggression he could let out on the walkers or someone else. Many of you know I studied psychology and know a lot about it from myself as well and in the past self harm was often mistaken with suicide attempts in treatment. It’s not the same! People who self harm often don’t want to die, they self harm because they want to keep themselves under control so they don’t kill themselves. Self harm and suicidal tendencies are not the same! Some people self harm to feel alive again, to feel themselves again (that’s why mindfulness in therapy is such a big topic), to control their overwhelming feelings or to feel the pain in a physical way instead of the emotional way (cause you can somehow control physical pain by treating it - a wound for example that’s why many people who self harm take extra good self care of it - but you can’t control emotional pain. I describe Rick often as a control freak and even if I think that in this scene his suicidal tendencies were indeed real, it showed definitely a part of him I always expected while others often told me like “what Rick? Never would he think about suicide or self harm”. Oh yes he does. He likes the pain and thrives from it cause it makes him feel alive. Thats why he goes absolutely savage without a second thought cause he can let it out there and fight like a monster and it doesn’t even bother him cause he only feels alive then. You can even see how his look changes and he comes back to life after he cut himself and realizes what he was doing. Great acting as well! Cause often you end a dissociative moment where you could easily unalive yourself by inflicting pain so you come back to reality then and often you can’t even remember how you got there. Thats why people who blame others for suicide cause “it’s selfish” are absolutely in the wrong too cause no one in the right mind would do it if they would be able to think that far in that moment. You’re not cause you’re in an absolute exceptional circumstance where your brain chemicals are not working anymore. Pain or the caused adrenaline after it can help bringing it back. Sorry for the Ted talk.

- he writes (love) letters to Michonne and I always imagined him as a reader and writer who likes poetry and wouldn’t only write beautiful letters but also nice poems for the ones he loves. He’s a romantic and I’m glad they showed that. (And yes again I feel so connected to him that since I write, I thought he has to write too haha)

- He admits to Michonne in the dream sequence that he’s late and I always imagined him as an over sleeper due to his insomnia and someone who sometimes is a bit tardy. Even if he tries desperately to be a morning person to get things done, he needs a lot of strong coffee and some time to pass before he functions and talks properly (and yes he loves staying in bed all day). He’s still super reliable and will always be there when you need him, but it might happen he is a bit late 🤣 and the insomnia and nightmares from his ptsd? Also well represented.

- In my head he always was a sweet tooth and a junk food lover and surprise: we got the pizza quote and how much he loves that xD

Bonus:

Also do I have to mention how I imagined the crm working with the ranks and everything years ago with my partners already? Also the A and B thing? My first verse for my OC Alex was the crm and I created her when I first wrote Rick in that world, imagining a character like her fitting there perfectly and teaming up with him. How funny that Thorne exactly fits that badass female character and how she is played by the love interest actress of the face I used for Alex. 🤣 damn I was so close with getting her actress right as well.

#hey welcome to my Ted talk about Rick which could easily be a book #tw self harm #headcanon #tw suicide #spoilers #this is obviously just my interpretation don’t come at me!#but in the past I always hold these headcanons back cause I was scared people come at me for it #but now I always love to read them from others so I thought I might share mine #also if my writing partners find other similarities please let me know I love when we find these together #man this is way too long and nearly embarrassing #that’s why I never do this xD #sorry to everyone reading it 🤣🤣🤣#tell me to never do it again and I won’t otherwise you get that every week now

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