#hope is sick | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

absentlyabbie · 2 months

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taking my life into my hands to resurrect this godawful hellpoll and let it run for a week this time

#tumblr polls #my polls #poll #rice v potato #let's see if we can avoid getting weirdly and vehemently racial with it this time!#i am making this choice while sick and brain muddle-y so let's hope i don't regret it #last attempt at this seven months ago managed to get over 6k votes in 24 hours #let's see if this will once again be rip my notifications

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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caffichai · 3 months

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Polar bears are like, legendarily chubby! So here's my artistic take on Aurora

#I can but I can't believe they made the polar bear girl so skinny! :P #Hope you guys like winter stores and spare tires!#Man it was a brutally busy December. I was gonna draw sooo much and then I got sick on top of everything else so this is all I got Q_Q #But I hope y'all enjoy it!#aurora #arknights #pixel art #pixel #digital art #polar bear #ak

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slutdge · 3 months

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decriminalizing drugs and being opposed to forced rehab is important as a leftist but what a lot of leftists i meet seem to be unable to grasp is that you need to also be ok with people doing drugs for the rest of their lives. of course healing the environment that causes people to become addicts and making mental health services available and making drug use safer via needle exchanges is important, but you also need to know that even if all addicts are given all of those resources some of them will still continue to use drugs and you need to be ok with that. you need to view that as neutral. you cannot proclaim yourself a leftist while trying to dictate what people do with their own bodies even if you think you have good intentions or that its in the best interest of an addict. you need to accept this if you have truly destigmatized drug use in your mind like a lot of yall claim you have but dont actually reflect that in your words and actions when you call for forced rehab. help should always be available and encouraged, but the option to still use drugs despite that should be too. zero criticism will be considered on this post cause i know yall that disagree with this and merely cosplay as leftists online have never actually had an addiction or known someone with an addiction. have a nice day.

#🔗#hope i articulated this well enough cause im extremely sick as well as experiencing The Symptoms Of Psychosis #eta yall lose reblog priveleges now cause youre incapable of minding your fuckin business

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ardeidae-e · 4 months

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i was gonna post another drawing but this gave me so much needed serotonin that i want yall to have it too

#this is a redraw from that one scott pilgrim frame btw #when the trailer came out and i saw this frame i was like yeah imma skk this #i hope this makes you scream and cry on the floor like it did to me #they make me sick #help me god #bungou stray dogs #chuuya nakahara #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #soukoku #bsd skk #redraw #my art

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tinyfantasminha · 6 months

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guys unfortunately ace trappola has to die I have to kill him

#twisted wonderland #twst meme #twst shitpost #jack howl #ace trappola #THEY SHARED 3 EVENTS TOGETHER..... AND IN ALL OF THEM JACK IS R CARD WHILE ACE IS SR OR HIGHER 💀HOW IS THIS FAIR #JACK IS ON HIS FOURTH R CARD. FOURTHHHHHHH #ACE HAS ZERO EVENT R CARDS #I hope after this ace gets thrown in R jail and jack starts getting the SRs im so SICK AND TIRED FOR THIS #this is no longer an anti-idia zone its an anti-trappola zone #i want that twink obliterated #also me: *wants to roll for ace playful dress SSR*

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ventresses · 5 months

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Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith (7/?) - Mustafar, part 1

Star Wars + Text Posts & Headlines

#i hope no one's getting sick of these bc i keep thinking of more #padme amidala #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #palpatine #obi wan #darth sidious #revenge of the sith #anakin #padme #star wars #sw revenge of the sith #star wars memes #sw rots #prequels memes #ROTS text post #mine #star wars text post

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sudaca-swag · 5 months

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the western world when a country is just a regular place where people live their regular lives and isnt built specifically as a tourist paradise for them to have fun at:

#“they didnt speak english there arent many night activities there was a protest in the streets”#i hope they shoot you down in your weird favelas safari fucking sick weirdos #gringadas

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guppyfish77 · 2 months

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Singing in the rain

#my art #submas #pokemon fanart #fanart #sbms #pokemon #subway boss ingo #Ingo #wuaaa I was hoping to finish this in January #but I was sick that entire month #rip #anyways there is going to be a companion piece for this in the future ✌#with emmet #if I don't get distracted #yup yup

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kaogens · 2 months

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vday vashwood..... :P

#trigun #vashwood #vash the stampede #wolfwood #nicholas d. wolfwood #they make me sick GET A ROOM.#happy valentines day u guys!!!! hope everyone is lovepilled this year

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ash-and-starlight · 5 months

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one day, in a thousand years

#I THINK I HAUVE COVID #oh to meet your love after a thousand years at a museum exhibit of your past lives #thinking about them makes me so sick so ILL DISEASED #I AM NOT IMMUNE #spc i’m cursing u forever for this wtf. WTF bro wtf #ouyang’s last thoughts were a desperate plea for esen to wait for him.#he has NEVER called him by first name he has NEVER asked him anything #and his last thought is asking him to wait #and esen does. bc he would have given ouyang anything he asked for #god i hope u get rawed so good it makes up for all the lost lifetimes u earned it #he who drowned the world #she who became the sun #the radiant emperor #general ouyang #esen-temur #(zhu also present in the golden imperial dragon and the golden light of gayness that brought them together again)#my art #not super proud of how it turned out tbh tbh it looks better in my head 😔😔#would’ve stayed in the drafts if not for my need to feed this 4 ppl fandom #and if not for robin motivation nfngdjfb ty kissa you forever #id in alt text

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transgendz · 29 days

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My roommate and I are financially unstable while he does through a long, complicated diagnosis process that started as we stopped being homeless. I just got a job, and it's going to pay well and allow us to get caught up and stable, but I don't get my check for a week and a half. We have rent due on the 1st, our storage bill due at the end of the month, and we are out of food.

Dm me for proof or details

I will do art for anyone who gives, just message me @theartistrans I also take commissions there.