◍Mattress is uncomfortable because it's literally just hay
◍Smells like hay and horse
◍bed bug breeding ground
◍head lice breeding ground
Zora's Domain Bed
4/10 - would recommend if desperate
◍looks like a building inspector's worst nightmare
◍Sleepwalkers are going to become sleep swimmers
◍Cold
◍NO COVERS/DUVET?? Prison. Only lurelin gets let off about it because it's not surrounded by cold ass water
Lurelin Village Bed
6/10 - would recommend
◍looks comfy enough
◍my only issue is where are the blankets? The duvets, even?? I know lurelin village houses have no doors but like I like to curl into a ball, cause severe future back problems for myself and get warm, ok?
I desperately need someone to take my spine apart and put it back in place like rebuilding a failed Lego 1x1 skyscraper/sword please this is a cry for help
Kakariko Village Bed
10/10 - would ALWAYS recommend
◍Comfy
◍Reliable and sturdy bedframe
◍Silk bedsheets that are always fresh
◍Literally THE perfect bed
I, personally, would KILL for this bed. I would strike down calamity ganon himself.
Paya's Bed
9/10 - would recommend for speed runners
◍Impa would get off her cushion and beat your ass if she ever caught you sleeping in her granddaughters bed
That's it
Rito Village Bed 1
5/10 - would recommend
◍Would have to do some parkour to get on
◍Try not to roll over, otherwise you'll be sleeping on the floor with a bruised arm or something
I used to watch all those 'world's deadliest animal' programs as a kid and it made me want to do that so bad, but the most dangerous animals we had were cows [grew up in England] so I'd just go into our back field with a disposable camera and snap the most blurry, shitty pics of these cattle, then afterwards mum would take me to get them developed and I'd pin them on my cork board with stupid little notes written next to them like 'Oct 5th 2003, spotted the deadly Longhorn today. Almost got gored.'