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joekeeray · 2 years

Text

A Simple Solution

pairing: Single Dad!Steve Harrington/Female Reader

summary: Robin proposes a solution to fixing Steve’s attitude due to the high stress of being a single father of an infant, and you decide to give it a shot when your solution fails.

warnings/extra tags: explicit smut, MINORS DNI, masturbation with help™, oral sex (male receiving), grinding, unprotected sex, thigh fucking, single daddy steve, snarky and stressed steve, steve in gray sweatpants, steve has a bit of a praise kink for a second, he also has a big dick no complaints here, he comes twice cause why not, beta read, edited by me

note: I've been writing a single dad steve series, and I needed to write this. tagging @gothbitchshit for no reason other than to say hi. Thank you for reading and please enjoy~

✦✦✦

Steve's son was only about 3 months old when you moved in. It was a mutual agreement between you two, from high school acquaintances to co-workers at Scoops Ahoy one summer turned friends now turned roommates years later, and Steve had made it clear to you that his son would never have to be your responsibility.

What he meant was that he'd never expect you to babysit him, make you buy him things like formula or diapers, or to even wake up and take care of him when he cries late into the night (as a housewarming gift he gifted you a walk-man for when that happens). And while you didn't actually mind having an infant in the house or helping Steve from time to time, you did respect these boundaries of his.

Steve wanted to do this on his own, and you understood that. After all, he did let you move in after you were evicted by your parents because an adult shouldn't be living with their parents still (their words) and he had an extra room. Also, he didn't exactly hate the idea of splitting monthly and weekly expenses with someone.

It wasn't like Steve didn't let you near his son or anything, in fact, he encouraged it, wanting his son used to people. You absolutely loved holding him and talking to him, you enjoyed reading to him too, especially when Steve would just fall asleep with him in his arms and you'd pick him up and take him to bed to let Steve sleep while you read him a story or told him about your day.

"How was your day? Ah, you're just a little baby," you would say as you changed him, "Your day was a random elderly woman cooing and saying hi to you, huh?"

And he'd just stare up at you with those big brown eyes that matched Steve's, and you'd sit down on the rocking chair with him in your lap while Steve got much needed rest on the couch in the living room.

That was pretty much it, but now that his son was around 6 months old...you did wish that Steve would let you help. More than just that, more than just watching him for about an hour because he needed to run out really quick, or handing him some bottles when he needed one. It was because, well, you could tell he was exhausted and could use a little more than the help you've been giving him.

Except, he stood by not needing your help, or anyone's help for that matter except for a paid babysitter whenever he was at work (which you found silly because you would watch him for free on the days Steve worked and you didn't).

All in all, you just wanted to help, but Steve was stubborn. Stubborn and tired...and he'd gotten a little snappy lately too.

It was a day off for you, and you were up early because his son typically woke you up around 5 am. He hadn't been doing it lately, but your mind clung to that sleep schedule.

You were standing in the semi-clean kitchen, well just unorganized really, and was making more bottles while flipping through a magazine after you decided to clean the dishes and other bottles left beside the sink from the night before.

You were shaking one and flipping the page of the magazine when you heard a door creak open from down the hall and looked up to see Steve entering the kitchen a few seconds later.

His eyes were squinted, his hair slightly greasy and sticking up in various directions, and he was only wearing a pair of gym shorts so his hair covered chest was on full display, not something you weren't used to. He stood for a good moment or two just staring at you, then at the bottles you had made.

"You...you don't have to do that," he said after rubbing his eyes, "I told you that you don't have to do...anything."

You set down the bottle you were shaking, which was actually the last one as you said, "I was awake, and had nothing else to do...so..."

He looked at all the bottles, a frown on his lips before he brought his hands to his face and sighed. You crossed your arms and leaned on the counter.

"Look okay, I told you when you moved in-"

"I know," you cut him off, "It's really not a big deal, Steve..."

"It's just- I told you I wanted to do this on my own-"

"And you have been," you told him sternly as you checked one of the bottles, knowing that Steve was up to go and feed his baby. You held it out for him, "I just wanted to help."

He stared at you, then at the bottle, and he took it from you while saying, "I literally never asked you for it, but whatever."

Before he turned away, he gave you one last look before walking back down the hall. You huffed, turning back to the bottles and thought he was being a bit much. You only made a few bottles, something you actually always did he just always thought he made more than normal.

"God, did I make this much? I'm so tired I don't even remember," Steve told you one Thursday night when he was going to give his son a bottle.

You decided then and there that you weren't going to hang out with him today like planned, and after putting them in the fridge (which was something you knew Steve would get snarky with about too but did it anyway) you went back to your room, but not before stopping in the doorway of his son's room and seeing Steve sitting on the rocking chair holding his newborn in his arms and smiling down at him as he fed him.

He still looked so tired though, but you continued to your room, lightly closing the door and grabbing the walk man so Tears for Fears could put you back to sleep for a bit.

✦✦✦

"God someone needs to get laid," Robin Buckley's voice echoed from beside you. You nearly choked on the pretzel you were currently eating while walking around at the mall that was a town over from Hawkins.

It was a nice half-way point between you, Nancy Wheeler, and Robin, who was actually Steve's best friend that you stole for a second since he hadn't even talked to her lately.

"Robin," Nancy was on the other side of you, shopping bags in one hand, "Don't say that so loud." Her blue eyes looked at the families around them and Robin cringed suddenly.

"Okay, but my point still stands, I know more than the normal person about Steve's sex life...unfortunately...and when he wasn't getting any, he got snarky like that," Robin said, and honestly, you think you knew what Robin was talking about too now, remembering particularly when working at Scoops together, the guy had a whole attitude until he was back in the game.

Nancy just grimaced, "Well he is a single dad of a 6 month old, has he been out like at all?" The question was targeted toward you, and you lifted your head after biting into your pretzel and nodded.

"Yeah, he goes out...to get diapers and baby stuff...and to work," you said fully knowing that's not what Nancy meant. She gave you a look and you scoffed, "Other than that, no not really, he spends every day off at home, and we hang a lot in the house when it's both of our days off. We were supposed to today until he said that to me."

Robin hummed, "Can't really blame the guy though, right? The little guy is born, mother vanishes, he's all alone taking care of him...till you moved in. He's just stressed, right?"

You took another bite of your pretzel, teeth digging into the fluffy bread as you turned to look at Robin, "Well, I moved in to make it easier with bills and stuff but…no I messed up...he told me he didn't need help like that, and I overstepped."

"Well...out of all of us here, you're seeing it right? You said he's tired all the time, forgets to do things like make extra bottles because he's working so much and getting very little sleep...you were just trying to help," Nancy said with a shrug, and while that was true...you still felt bad.

Robin saw your conflicted expression and wrapped a friendly arm around you, "I'm sure it's fine, just you know, talk to him, express some friendly concern and maybe tell him my solution...or better yet, maybe help him with that solution?"

You snapped your eyes up to meet Robin's, feeling your cheeks heat up and she chuckled as she poked your nose, "I'm joking...but this is probably a good time to tell you that he did have a crush on you when we all worked together at Scoops Ahoy...and after that too."

You furrowed your eyebrows, then laughed in her face, "Robin, he had a crush on you."

"Yeah, he did, but for obvious reasons, that was never going to work out for him, but he liked you too, and for much longer than he liked me, so...I don't know..." Robin trailed off, and you sighed as you turned to look at Nancy.

"I would just talk to him, not about her solution because that would just make it weird," Nancy told you quickly, before she looked around and leaned in, "But...maybe he does need what Robin thinks, it doesn't have to be you though."

Your cheeks grew more hot, but there was another sort of feeling that stirred inside of you when you thought about Steve actively going out to find someone to sleep with. You took the last bite of your pretzel then and looked forward, thinking about what Robin and Nancy had said...and as your eyes caught a donuts shop you and he once went to before his son was born, you thought maybe instead of Robin's solution you could try another.

Later that night you returned to Hawkins with a couple of shopping bags, and a box of freshly made donuts that included at least three of his favorite one. It was their bear claws, and you knew this because Steve still brought it up sometimes, claiming he’d never have a donut like that again.

Steve was in the living room, sitting on the couch in front of his son who was sitting in a high chair. There was a jar of half-full baby food sitting on the tray portion, and Steve was leaning in and wiping his son’s face. He’d been trying to introduce him to solids since at the last appointment the doctor told him it was okay, but more food had gotten onto his chin rather than his mouth on this attempt.

“That’s okay,” Steve told him with a warm smile as he wiped off the excess food on his lips, “We’ll try next time.” His son stared at him before the corner of his lips started to curl up and Steve chuckled as he leaned in and kissed his cheek affectionately, “You have a charming smile just like your daddy, huh? Yes you do. Gonna make all the boys and girls swoon with that smile." His son’s smile only grew, making Steve chuckle and kiss him again.

You had entered through the door in the kitchen, and the door lightly slamming captured Steve's attention. He looked up, seeing an unreadable expression on your features when he saw you setting down things on the now clean kitchen counter.

"Uh, hey," Steve told you, then he looked back at his son with a grimace on his face because of how you just left after what happened in the morning. His son just stared blankly at him, as if trying to figure out why his dad’s face looked like that (He should know because Steve talked about it to him while he changed his diaper earlier).

"Hi," you replied back lamely as you started to remove your coat and set it down on the back of one of the stools in the kitchen. It was awkwardly silent, save for the late cartoons playing on the small tv.

Steve swallowed thickly, feeling bad about what happened in the morning, especially with how you two had plans today and you were mad enough to leave. He moved to stand, picking his son up at the same time and holding him against his chest as he entered the kitchen with you.

"So...how is Robin and Nance?" he asked you, eyes moving toward the various shopping bags, not having yet seen the donuts box you purposely set on the counter behind you.

"They're good, you should really give Robin a call though, she won't admit it but she misses your phone calls," you told him nonchalantly, "And I think she really wants to see the little guy again."

Steve watched a smile grow on your lips at the sight of his son, and it made him feel slightly warm, but also...regretful. He took a deep breath, wanting to make the feeling go away.

"Look, I had a very eye opening conversation with the little guy about what happened this morning,” Steve lightly joked, which didn’t fail to make your warm smile toward his son turn slightly amused, “And…I'm sorry…I know you're just trying to help out.”

You crossed your arms, choosing to lean on the counter again as your eyes lifted back up to Steve's as your expression turned more serious, "It's okay, you told me not to, but...I just see you struggling you know? And I want to help, and I don't mean act like his mom or something, just...like as a friend...or an unofficial aunt."

Steve stared at you for a moment, that warm feeling only growing, but he still felt a bit indifferent about it. You could tell by the way his expression faltered.

"I know, I know...it's just, he's my son? And I need to know that I can take care of him on my own because if I let you help then what would happen if you left? What if I just mess up because I’m incapable of taking care of my own kid?" he asked you genuinely because he had been thinking about that, too afraid he'd start relying on you so much that he'd be hopeless. He had already been through similar situations, sans being a single dad, and he was determined to never let that happen again where he was thrown into a responsibility he wasn’t ready for.

"Steve...you are such a good dad, I don't think that's possible," you said with a small laugh of disbelief, "Everything you're doing for him...working all those hours, spending every hour you aren't working with him...but that doesn’t mean you have to do everything on your own especially since help is just right here."

“I know,” Steve replied, voice slightly hoarse.

You were pushing yourself off of the counter now, going toward the box of donuts now, "I'm not going to do everything, just you know, make some bottles here and then, take care of him so you can sleep longer...maybe even watch him if you want to go out with some date or something...things like that."

Steve laughed at that, not at the whole thing, but the dating part and he said, "You seriously think I'm getting dates?"

"I don't know...some women like the whole single dad thing...you haven't noticed when we go out some are looking at you with major heart eyes, Steve?" you asked, "Especially when you do that baby talk to him? Some find it hot."

Steve furrowed his brows, then laughed again, "Right…”

“It’s true,” you replied with a weak shrug, “There’s just something about the young dad vibe that is just incredibly attractive.”

Steve stared at the back of your head, swiping his tongue over his suddenly dry lips, and he said, “Are you one of these women? It sounds like you're talking from experience."

You glanced over your shoulder at Steve before you opened the box of donuts that were still hidden from Steve's view and you replied, "I'm not immune to it."

At your confession, it made Steve's cheeks grow a bit pink but then his son was reaching up to touch his nose, distracting him. Steve grinned down at him, and asked in that same voice without thinking, "Alright, alright, you have my attention again- you want a bottle?"

You turned toward Steve again, holding a bear paw in your hand that was meant for Steve and felt your chest tighten. You weren't lying when you said you weren't immune to it, the way he looked when holding his son, the way he talked to him, but you were luckier than the women who just walked by him in the street, you got to see this everyday. Him being so caring, so protective and so loving to his son. In your honest opinion, Steve just got hotter to you since living with him. He was hot before, but now you can't ignore or deny it like you did when you were classmates and coworkers at an ice cream parlor.

You softly cleared your throat, capturing Steve's attention. He lifted his eyes to look at you, before you waved the bear claw and his eyes moved toward it. You could practically see his eyes light up and his mouth beginning to water at the simple sight of it.

"Fuck, give me that right now," Steve cursed, and you chuckled and walked toward him. You held it to his lips and Steve leaned forward to take a bite out of it, and practically moaned at its sugary taste, "God, give me another bite."

You did as told, holding it back up to his lips as he took another bite, a bigger one this time with his eyes boring into yours. You bit your inner cheek, thinking this was probably working. You didn't want to think about Steve needing to have sex or something when this donut was practically doing the same thing...easing his nerves even for just a bit.

"So...are we okay then?" you asked him as he swallowed his second bite.

"Yeah...yeah we're okay," he said, shooting you a sweet grin before he opened his mouth again. You rolled your eyes playfully and said, "Then give me him and feed yourself."

Steve pouted at you, but did as told. You took his son in your arms, speaking in a high pitched voice as you said, "Hi, how was your day with your daddy? Sorry I didn't get you a donut, but I promise I’ll bring you one too when you’re a little older." You smoothed down the dark hair on his head, and his son gazed up at you and reached out to touch your cheek and smile.

Steve stopped midway from bringing the rest of the donut to his mouth, eyes resting on you and feeling some kind of heat rather than a regular warmth at the sight of you holding his son and with the smile and look of joy you were putting on his little face.

What you didn’t know, and Steve never going to tell you, was that there was another reason he didn't want you helping out so much, and the heat he was feeling right now just watching with his son, how it always had been since you moved in, was it. He rather focused on his donut, tearing his eyes from you as you grabbed a bottle, made by you of course, and sauntered off toward his son’s bedroom.

✦✦✦

Things were going okay between you and Steve, and he had seemed less stressed with him letting you help him out some more. It was more than you were doing before, but not too much either. He wasn't snapping at you again...until today.

You had gotten off of your shift early, a rare occasion to happen, and you had gone straight home and you told the sitter she could go home.

You didn't think Steve would be bothered by it since he started to accept more of your help, but something must've happened during his day at work because when got home and only found you and his son, and no babysitter, he grew slightly irritated.

"I just think you should ask me first," Steve told you as he picked his son out of the cradle swing that was set out in the living room. You looked at Steve with a raised brow.

"Okay? Do you not trust me or something to watch him? I don't see the problem," you bit back, growing irritated with him now. Steve sighed, kissing his son on nose as a hello and glancing at you. You were in the kitchen again, and he followed after you.

"No, I trust you, I just think if you're going to send the sitter home you should let me know," he said with a bit of a firm tone in his voice that you didn't like.

You honestly didn't think it was that big of a deal because you were here and it made no sense for her to stick around until he got home. He was leaving him here with you on your days off in the past weeks since your talk and suddenly this was a problem.

"I would apologize, but I don't see why I have to," you muttered, knowing Steve was in one of his moods again.

"It's because-" Steve paused, as if trying to think about exactly why, but when he didn't come up with anything you were laughing and shaking your head as you opened the fridge and bent over to look for one of the containers you'd brought home from work.

"You don't even know why," you said, then sighed and said, "But fine, next time I'll just call you and bother you at work." You heard Steve scoff just as you found what you were looking for.

"It's not about that-" Steve said but you were turning around and holding a piece of lemon cake you made at the bakery you worked full-time at in your hand and telling to be quiet and just eat the cake.

Steve just stared at you, then the lemon cake dumbfounded, and he said, "I don't want that...whatever, just-" He was shaking his head and turning away, leaving you standing there. The last thing you heard was Steve asking his son, "Why does she keep trying to feed me sweets?"

You stood in the kitchen for a good few minutes after he'd left, looking at the lemon cake in your hand before shoving it into your own mouth and chewing it obnoxiously. It was the first time Steve refused to eat a sweet you were offering him, not knowing that you were always doing it whenever he got into a mood and was unintentionally averting his irritation toward you.

You went to your room a few minutes after that, and decided to call Robin and when she answered, she told you exactly what she told you at the mall. He desperately needed to get laid, and he didn't even know it.

"Oh god, if I do tell him that he's probably going to call me gross," you said, now weighing in her suggestion because honestly, you didn't know what else would ease the guy's stress and tension.

"Yeah, but then he'll think about it and realize you're probably right, I can tell him? Just put him on the phone right now," Robin said, making you chuckle.

"I think he's asleep…somehow," you said, glancing through your open door to see the hallway illuminated with the tv screen, "The little guy's quiet, so..."

"Bliss for a single dad, god I miss that kid, how is he?"

You told Robin about Steve's son, something he probably should be doing, but like you said he barely called her anymore either with the tight schedule he had. After a few more minutes of talking, Robin left you with a 'get him laid (y/n)' before hanging up.

It had made you laugh sarcastically again, but honestly, you didn't know what else to even do. Even as you walked out into the living room and saw him laying on the couch with his eyes closed he looked so fucking tense. His eyebrows were furrowed, his jaw was clenched, and you could see the tension in his shoulders as well.

You mindlessly walked over to the TV, turning it off for him, but the moment you did, his eyes opened and he was saying your name. You didn't look at him until he said your name a second time.

"Hey, I'm sorry okay, I had a bad day at work, Keith made me work overtime and-"

"Look Steve," you started with, "I get it, okay, you're stressed and I understand why! I thought maybe if I helped you out especially with your son you would be less stressed and less of, let's face it, a jerk to me, but god, it's like anything I do you just get mad at me."

Steve was taken back by your words, eyes blinking rapidly at you as he moved to sit up. You crossed your arms and stared at him expectantly, waiting for him to speak. He pressed his lips together before cursing under his breath and saying, "I know, you're right and believe me- I'm trying not to okay, I'm sorry for getting mad about the babysitter, it's fine, if anything I prefer you to take care of him because he loves you so much."

You were a bit touched by that, your expression softening slightly, but you were still mad at Steve so you kept the softness brief before forcing it back to your expectant one.

"Then what's the matter?" you asked him.

He slouched slightly, bringing his hands to his messed up hair as he groaned and said, "Trust me I feel like an asshole every time I snap at you like that...I just have all this tension, and I don't know what to do about it...should I try like..yoga or something? Meditation?"

You huffed at the idea of Steve doing yoga, and you moved to fall into the space next to him, gazing at him for a moment before saying, "Robin...thinks it's because you need to have sex or at least an orgasm."

You watched Steve pause, the hand rubbing his scalp halting at once, and he lifted his head and looked at you with yet another dumbfounded look. You shrugged weakly, averting your eyes away from him as you said, "It beats what I've been doing...feeding you sweets..."

His eyes grew wide, now knowing that was why and feeling slightly embarrassed that he had to be coaxed into having a better attitude, but before he could respond to that you continued, "And maybe...she's right? When's the last time you've...you know..." You made a jerking off motion, making Steve's cheeks become flushed.

"Uh..." he pressed his lips together tightly, actually taking the question serious and he found that he really couldn't remember the last time he'd jerked off, let alone had sex with anyone. And maybe, the more he thought about, the more Robin did have a point...

You shifted in your spot so that you were facing him, resting your arm on the back edge of the couch and looking curiously at him before nudging him.

He looked back at you, his tongue swiping his bottom lip gently before he nodded, "She's probably right, but if that's what it takes...yeah you're gonna have to deal with me."

You rolled your eyes, "Anyone would hook up with you still in a heartbeat Harrington, just ask any woman at the supermarket."

Steve shrugged, "So you say, but would I hook up with them? I don't know them, after that little guy in there...I don't think I can have sex with just anyone anymore.”

You were chewing on your inner cheek at Steve’s words, contemplating another thing Robin had told you…that you could actually help with her solution for him. You rested the side of your head in your palm, fluttering your eyelashes slightly at Steve before you said, “Well…it doesn’t have to be just anyone…would you be…more comfortable if it was someone you knew?”

It was a loaded question, you were well aware of it, and Steve seemed to understand immediately what you were suggesting. He looked at you again, brown eyes observing you closely, and his cheeks turning slightly red. You offered him a smile, and raised both eyebrows suggestively at him.

His lips parted for a second, and he ran his hand through his thick, messy hair as he replied, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

You didn’t want to look or sound too disappointed, or too eager either, but you did pout slightly, something he also caught, and you said, “We don’t have to have actual sex…I could just help you get off. It’s always better when someone does it for you, right?”

It was Steve shifting in his spot too now because the simple idea of you touching him down there was making his cock twitch in his sweatpants. He hadn’t been touched in a while, he knew that for sure now if just you suggesting it had him getting aroused.

He cursed underneath his breath, glanced down at his crotch, making you follow his gaze. You rested your eyes on the prominent outline of his cock through his sweatpants that you hadn’t noticed he was wearing until now. They were the gray pair that left little to the imagination in the first place when he wore them, but right now the hardness cock was painfully obvious and you felt heat spread through your abdomen.

You took a sharp intake of breath, remembering suddenly something Robin told you as well at the mall.

“I don’t know if you wanted me to know this,” you started, moving toward Steve wearily, he turned his head to look at you moving closer, “But Robin told me you used to have a crush on me.”

Steve blinked for a moment, then laughed nervously as he said, “She told you that?” You nodded, settling on your knees beside him, licking his lips again as he said, “She’s right…I did.”

“How come you never told me?” you asked him softly, “I might’ve given you a chance.”

He chuckled at that, liking the way you tilted your head at him so curiously again as he said softly that he didn’t know why he never did. You had always seemed like this girl that was so out of his reach despite being so close, up until right now at least, because you’ve never been this close to him and he had to stop his breath from hitching with arousal.

He knew the very reason it was a bad idea was because his ‘crush’ on you hadn’t exactly faded, if that heat he felt whenever you held his son said anything else, so he wasn’t sure what would happen if you both took this step like this. But fuck, the thought of being touched in the first time in what feels like forever in his mind send tremors of anticipation and arousal through him. And it was also the fact that you were asking to touch him, that you wanted to do it…and Steve wanted it too.

You were leaning slightly, and you said in almost a whisper, “So…let me help you.”

Steve’s breath hitched in his throat, feeling way too aroused from just you being so close, and he was nodding. He nearly groaned when he felt your fingers touching his thigh and moving upward until he felt the tips of your fingers touching his cock that was still confined in his sweatpants.

His breath shook, and his eyes fluttered shut for a second as you gently dragged your fingers up and down his hardening cock. Your head was tilted downward, listening to the way Steve’s breathing was becoming deeper and heavier with every drag of your fingers.

“Fuck, yeah that feels…so fucking good,” Steve said, his voice an octave deeper, “Keep going.”

You hummed in response, before pressing your hand against his cock and started to rub him. He nearly choked on the groan he let out, and he spread his legs for you, slouching slightly as his head hit the back of the couch. He felt your hand grasp him, starting to rub him in a way that felt so goddamn good even above the fabric of his sweats.

It was a quiet hum that made Steve look at you leaning over him now, his head falling forward. You looked so focused as you wrapped your hand around him, and ran your thumb over the tip then. Steve’s hips bucked upwards when you did that, and you chuckled softly, moving your other hand to grab the back of the couch again to steady yourself.

He felt so fucking big underneath your hand, and when your eyes caught sight of the dark gray spot that began to seep through the light gray fabric, your mouth watered like Steve’s did when he saw that stupid bear claw you bought him weeks ago.

You bit your bottom lip, running your thumb across his tip again and listening to the noises that Steve was letting slip past his lips as you moved your hand back and forth. You never took him for a vocal lover, but then again maybe it was because he hadn’t been touched by anyone in so fucking long and he probably couldn’t help it. But fuck, it was hot to hear him, especially when the moans turned into breathless cursing as your hand worked faster.

Your eyes moved to his face, taking in the sight of his eyes that were practically shining and his lips that were wet with his spit. You started to rub him again, and watched as he threw head back and groaned out a ‘fuck.’ It made you smile, almost proud of yourself and you glanced back down at his crotch, seeing the wet spot had only gotten bigger and more obvious the more he bucked his hips in his hand.

“Damn Steve,” you said breathlessly, making him look at you, “It’s worse than I thought. Are you going to cum in your pants right now?”

He laughed breathlessly as he replied, “Shut- oh fuck- shut up,” his voice cracked as you moved your hand faster and harder, then slower again, “Don’t - god- don’t act like you don’t know what you’re doing to me right now.”

You smiled innocently at him as you ran your hand over his entire cock again, “I can do more…if you want.” You were moving your hand off of him, making Steve whine at you for the loss of contact, but when he felt your hand at the waistband of his sweats, he was looking down at your hand, then back up at you.

Realizing what you meant, he said, “I shouldn’t…" You brought you hand back down to touch him again, and his eyes rolled back for a momennt before he said, "...but fuck I don’t even care, your hand feels so fucking good.”

At his words, you were lifting your hand back up and digging them beneath the waistband, feeling nothing but bare skin and you gasped and teased, “No boxers Steve? It’s almost like you knew…”

His cheeks grew even more red at this, and he said, “I never wear those when I wear these. Too uncomfortable.”

“Oh?”

He smirked at you, already knowing that you were pretending to be surprised. He was well aware that you knew he never did, having seen you staring when you thought he wasn’t paying attention. If anyone knew anything, it was you.

You leaned forward, pressing a light kiss to one of the many beauty marks that decorated the side of his neck, something you’ve actually always wanted to do, and Steve practically melted at the touch of your lips right there. He turned his head to face you, and you pressed your forehead to his as you asked him to tell you if he really wanted you to actually touch him.

And Steve cursed and said yes.

You reached your hand into his pants, listening to him gasp and then feeling him buck into your hands as you wrapped your fingers around the girth of his cock. You even let out a soft whine yourself, your eyebrows growing taunt just by how big he actually was in your hand.

Steve was right about you having stared before when he wore these pants, but you didn’t think he was this big even when you just rubbed him over his sweats not even a full two minutes ago. Letting out a shaky breath, you started to move your hand back and forth, pumping his cock and trying to contain your own whines that only edged Steve on. It was rough without any kind of lube, but Steve didn’t really care, just enjoying the feeling of your hand wrapped around him slowly jerking him off.

Your eyes were kept on each other, your foreheads touching and your noses just barely touching too. You feel his hot breath hitting you with every pant that slipped past his parted lips, and he could feel yours too. It would be easy to lean forward and make your lips touch too, to kiss you for the first time.

It was the way he was looking at you though that had you working harder for him, enjoying that blown out look in his pupils. You'd never seen him like this before, and it was making you pump him faster and harder.

“Steve…” you were saying his name, and with hooded eyes and an even quieter voice he asked you what it was you wanted to tell him. You licked your lips this time, knowing what you wanted and just saying it.

“Let me suck you off.”

His chest flooded with heat, and further anticipation, especially with how you said it, so desperate that he didn’t need to feel embarrassed by the way he sounded either.

“Are…are you sure you want to? You don’t have to,” he told you genuinely, “I’m okay with you getting me off like this…”

Your hand on him slowed down, simply rubbing him again that earned you a quiet groan as you said with a furrow of your eyebrows, “You’ve just been working so hard and stressing yourself out so much that you’ve been so cold to me…”

“Fuck I know- I don’t mean to be,” he replied, pressing his forehead more to yours, parting his lips trying to lean more upward so that he could kiss you. You let out a deep exhale, purposely keeping out of his reach and replied, “It’s okay, I know why you are...”

Steve rubbed his nose against yours too, wanting nothing more but to kiss you, but wanting to hear what you were going to say next.

“You’re such a good dad to the little guy, I think you deserve some kind of reward, some appreciation that none of your stupid co-workers or manager show you,” you told him with another few pumps of his cock between your hand, “Let me show you how I’ll appreciate you. You deserve this, Steve.”

For some reason, your words were spreading through Steve like wildfire that he felt like he might just come from your words. The words good dad, reward, and appreciation buzzing pleasantly through his head and itching a part of his brain that he didn’t even know existed. You saw this change in him, the way his eyes grew dark and you asked him again to let you appreciate him for being such a loving, good dad to his son.

“Yes, fuck, please,” he told you, and you smiled, leaning away before his lips could even barely touch yours, but he found he couldn’t be disappointed as he knew where those lips of yours were going. You stayed in your same spot beside him though, just shifting ever so slightly to give yourself more room before you were taking Steve’s hard cock out of his sweats.

You whined gently, even more impressed with how well endowed he was, and you looked up at Steve through your lashes and he shot you a smile. He knew that look because every time he was with someone for the first time they all gave him the same look of surprise before they started practically drooling at the sight of his thick cock.

He'd just never thought you'd be one of them.

You picked your jaw off the floor though, eyes shifting back to his pretty cock. You stuck your tongue out as you leaned down, dragging it from the bottom and upward. One of Steve’s hands went to his own head while the other reached upwards to rest on your back, his rough hands from working so much touching the soft skin of your back that was exposed from your shirt lifting in your new position.

“Shit- sorry,” Steve apologized, “Didn’t mean- to-” he choked out a soft groan as your tongue began to lick at the swollen tip of his cock, tasting the pre cum that was already there, “I didn’t mean to touch you-”

“You can touch me, Steve,” you told him breathlessly, his brown eyes resting on yours for a moment before your tongue was back on him. He pushed his own hair out of his face, focusing on your tongue and the heat in his stomach when you were suddenly taking him halfway into your mouth. He hadn’t expected that, considering how you seemed to be taking it nice and slow, and he moaned quite loudly.

He froze, eyes shooting toward the hallway, not wanting to wake up his son as it took a while for him to fall asleep. You didn’t really notice he did, getting him wet with the heat of your mouth and practically choking on him even though only about half of him was stuffed into your mouth.

When he heard no crying, Steve returned his focus onto you, making sure his noises of pleasure weren’t that loud again. His head fell back just over the back of the couch, enjoying the feeling of your hot and wet mouth around him as you started to bob your head up and down, the tip just barely touching the back of your throat, and your hand wrapping around the rest of him that you couldn’t take.

“Oh fuck, you’re right, I needed this- I needed this so fucking much,” he told you in a low, husky voice, his head dropping forward and his eyes moving over the curve of your body, resting on your ass that was sticking out in your current position. He barely realized you were wearing those terribly small shorts you wore when the ac was broken for a few days during the summer you moved in. It was winter now. He moved his hand lower to grab your ass, and squeezed the flesh there as he teased you by basically repeating what you told him earlier, “You’re wearing these shorts? It’s almost like you knew…”

You were taken off guard by his words and his hand squeezing your ass, so much that you hummed appreciatively around him, sending a pleasurable vibration up Steve’s cock and he practically gasped and bucked his hips upward in response. The sudden gesture caused his cock to hit your throat directly, and you were suddenly gagging. Your hand that wasn’t on his cock slapped onto his thigh and then you looked up at him, giving him a look that made him laugh breathlessly.

“Sorry,” he told you as you pulled off of him, deciding to use your hand for a moment, which felt much better with his cock covered in your spit. His eyes shifted from your hand pumping him, and back to your lips that were shining with your spit and looked more swollen than before. You were a very pretty sight indeed.

“It’s fine,” you told him, your voice slightly hoarse that Steve loved because it was because you were sucking his cock, you swallowed thickly and continued to say, “If you want me to take more of you, just ask.”

Steve sighed, and shook his head, “You don’t have to, I’m pretty big…don’t want to strain your throat.” You raised both brows at him, impressed by the smugness despite thinking he had every right to be smug. You’ve sucked cock before, but god, Steve had to be the biggest one and you liked a challenge.

You twisted your neck side to side, making Steve raise both eyebrows at you as he realized you were going to go for it as you got off of the couch and instead went to the ground between his spread open legs. Flashing him a little smirk, you were leaning down again and sliding him back into your mouth, flattening your tongue and lowering yourself as far as you could.

Your lips stretched out around the girth of him, your eyes closing as you focused on relaxing your throat so you can get at least most of him in.

The feeling of his cock so deep inside of your mouth had Steve’s smugness dissipating by the second. With every inch you took, he was becoming a mess, and he brought his hand to the back of your head. His breaths started to come in fast and heavy pants because holy fuck he didn’t expect you to be able to take so much of him, he never expected anyone to so with you doing this for him, it fucking wrecked him.

“God yeah, just like that, holy shit,” he told you, his voice becoming strained as you swallowed around him, “Fucking hell, yeah, yeah you know what you’re doing, fuck, fuck, fuck...”

His hand held on to the back of your head firmly, while your hands stayed on his thigh, wanting to prevent him literally going down your fucking throat when he finally came, which you knew he was close. You began to bob your head up and down again, making Steve moan out your name along with more curses that had you wanting to touch yourself.

The hand on the back of your head was helping you, lifting you and pushing down and he was very relieved that you were holding his thighs down because he couldn’t keep his hips from bucking upwards any longer. He was close, so fucking close, every time he hit the back of your throat you slightly gagged and it felt so fucking good, you felt good and he almost wanted to fucking thank you for doing this for him.

“I- I’m going to come,” he warned you between his pants and moans, “Yeah, yeah I’m going to oh my fucking god yeah-” His body folded toward you, his head dropping as he felt himself let out the longest, most hottest groan of his life when on the final bob of your head, you took him even further. He felt the back of your throat, and he was a goner.

With anyone else, Steve might’ve been embarrassed by his moans that turned into straight up whimpers as he came right into the back of your throat, and felt you desperately trying to swallowing. You took all of him, not wanting to pull away until you took every drop of cum he had to give you. His body twitched and convulsed with electric shocks of pleasure that he’d been denying himself of for a while now.

Steve lifted his head, letting out long breaths with his eyes still closed as you drank the last of him up. He was massaging the back of your scalp as you did so, saying things like why the fuck are so good at that and I haven’t came that hard in fucking forever.

His words made you smile smugly as you leaned away from him, your plump lips and chin covered in your own spit. His eyes softened at the sight of you though, and he moved his hand to gently cup your jaw and wipe your lip with his thumb almost affectionately.

“Feel…” you tried to speak, but your voice was more raspy than before. You had to clear your throat and Steve was smiling…again, which you promptly ignored because it was all smug like again, “Feel better?”

He sucked in a deep breath, wanting to steady his breathing as he thought about it. He honestly did feel a lot better, the tension he felt in his shoulders and back and basically every being released along with orgasm. He leaned back on to the couch, and nodded weakly.

“Yeah, I feel much better,” he replied, dropping his hand from your face to his thigh, right beside his softening cock. You nodded, content with that and started to move to stand, about to tell him that you were glad and needed to go to your room immediately for no particular reason related to the throbbing between your legs.

You didn’t account for your legs feeling wobbly though, and you fell forward onto Steve. He caught you quickly as your leg slotted between his, and you felt your cunt press against his thigh.

The pressure sent a jolt of pleasure through you when it did, and you were so turned on that you couldn’t stop the moan escaping your lips even if you wanted to. Steve gazed up at you, obviously having heard you and swallowed thickly as once again bit his bottom lip gently before releasing it.

You met his gaze, feeling slightly flustered that you’d moaned so easily, and maybe embarrassed because you didn’t want him to think you were expecting anything back, but then his hands were on your waist, as if wanting to keep you there.

“I’ve been thinking…for maybe about 2 minutes…” he started with, his voice slightly deeper, “It’s not just me who deserves a reward like this. You do too.”

He flexed his thigh underneath you and you gasped softly as the pressure again. Your hands flew to his shoulders, trying to steady yourself even though he was holding onto you.

“A reward for what? Dealing with you being a jerk?” you joked, and Steve nodded.

“Yeah,” he replied softly, “Let me make you feel good too…come on..” He was moving you to straddle him completely, and you settled right onto his lap, your clothed cunt pressing against his cock that was still out of his sweatpants.

His cock was still pretty sensitive from just coming that his eyes rolled back for a moment, before he asked you to lift your hips for him. You did as told, lifting your body to your knees above his lap and he was looking down at you before he brought his hand between your legs.

You moved your hands onto his shoulders again when you felt his fingers touching you, lightly at first, as if wanting to emulate the way you teased and touched him earlier. Your teeth caught your bottom lip, a quiet moan of his name making him look up at you with a heated gaze.

The soft moan of his name stirred Steve on as he pressed his fingers harder against your clit, starting to rub the bundle of nerves in small circles. The grip on his shoulders tightened as he did so, your teeth releasing your bottom lip as your moans turned into whimpers with his name being one of the things you kept saying.

“I’m sorry for being so mean to you,” Steve said, his voice strained, “I’ll be better, fuck, I promise.” His fingers moved faster and you didn’t even really listen to what he said, just chasing the pleasure his fingers were giving you and wishing there was no fucking fabric in the way.

“Fuck okay, okay,” Steve suddenly said, slowing down his movements, “Can you grind on me? I really need to feel you.”

You whined at the lost of contact because you felt so fucking close and too aroused to have him just stop like that, but then he was moving your hips back down so that your middles were pressed together again. The feeling of his cock against you again, which you were sure was half-hard, made you let out a choked out gasp and you were starting to grind against him like he asked without question.

The fabric of your shorts caused a delicious friction for Steve against his cock, especially with the way you were starting to grind against him, trying to get the same friction with your clothed clit. You cursed when his hips met your thrusts, and it hit your clit instantly, making you gasp and look down at Steve.

His head was tilted down, watching your clothed cunt drag across his cock, his lips were parted and pink as he looked absolutely enchanted by the way you were rutting against him desperately. It made it somehow even more hot that he was watching you so closely and you knew he was thinking about actually being inside of you…because you were thinking the same thing.

The mere idea of him burying that cock of his deep inside of you spurred you on, and you moved your hips faster, sending a jolt of ecstasy across your body. Steve cursed, especially as the couch even began to move by how hard you were grinding down on him and he felt his cock suddenly start to twitch again as you desperately rubbed your pussy on him.

“You’re getting me hard again,” he said with a gruff, his hands on your waist grasping you almost roughly as he moved you faster and harder on top of him, “Fuck, fuck yeah- do you feel fucking good? Grinding yourself against me like this?”

You dropped your head to meet his heated gaze as you nodded, “It feels so damn good, Steve.”

You clenched your teeth as you grasped the back of the couch now, wanting to give yourself more leverage, and Steve realized he couldn’t fucking handle this anymore as his cock hardened- he didn’t want you to come on his cock like this, thinking it would be a shitty reward compared to you sucking him off. He wanted to bury himself inside you, fucking you as deep as you could take him.

His mind was going absolutely feral at the idea your walls clenching around his cock, and he was asking you between his heavy pants, “I know I said no sex, but fuck it I need to be inside of you. Please let me fuck you, please.”

You didn’t hesitate as you said, “Yes, yes Steve please fuck me.”

Your answer was music to his ears, and he was moving you off of him and telling you to lay on your side on the couch. You practically fell onto the cushions of the large couch, with Steve squeezing behind you. You were pulling your shorts and underwear off while he kicked his own sweatpants off before he was grabbing your inner thigh and lifting your leg upward and telling you to keep it up as the hand went to his cock to stroke it a few times.

After a second or two, he positioned it right at your entrance, running the thick tip over your folds first that had you almost begging and he said in a gruff voice, “You’re fucking dripping…” He pushed his hips forward, the shaft of his cock pressing between your outer folds, letting your wetness soak him for a second before he was positioning the tip back at your entrance, gently shoving it between the folds of your pussy.

At this point, you were practically gone and had turned into nothing but a moaning, jittery mess that only wanted one thing and one thing only, which was him inside of you. You were actually starting to beg now, whimpers and pleas falling from your lips as you begged him to shove himself inside of you.

He wasted no time after that, pushing his cock deeper between your folds. The girth of him stretched you out almost immediately, and you almost choked on the spit that continued to collect in your mouth.

“Holy shit, Steve,” you told him, eyes growing slightly wide, “Please go slow.”

“I know,” Steve told you right beside your ear where his mouth was. You leaned back into him, your jaw dropping as he slowly pushed more into you, biting his lip at the feeling of you squeezing around him.

You squeezed your eyes shut, a whimper slipping past your lips as his cock stretched you out like no other had before and thinking this cock was going to ruin you because it was definitely going to be a hard one to beat, especially when it hit that spot inside of you that made your vision go starry.

You gripped the couch cushion beneath you, and buried your head into it as well as you took deep breaths, just feeling so goddamn full.

“It’s not even all the way in,” Steve told you with a smug chuckle before he kissed your earlobe gently and then your neck to try and help ease your pain of taking him specifically for the first time, “You're taking me so well though, baby, so fucking well. Tell me when you’re ready.”

After taking a few deep breaths, you lifted your head, turning it toward him and feeling his lips at the edge of your cheek as you started to nod, “I’m ready, god I’m ready.”

Steve complied almost immediately, starting to slowly pull out of you, then pushing himself back in, really holding himself back from shoving the rest of himself in because your pussy felt so fucking good around him. You leaned back on him, mouth open as you let out shattered whines along with Steve’s deep groans that were right in your ear.

It was like this for a bit, him slowly thrusting his cock in and out of you until you started to push your hips back for him, wanting him to go faster, but you actually accidentally took more of him. That almost made your scream out had it not been for his hand flying over your mouth.

“Do you wanna wake the little guy up?” Steve said quietly in your ear, voice now a rasp as well. You muttered against his palm an apology, and he shushed you as he started to move his hips at a faster pace for you, keeping his hand over your mouth still.

You tried to contain your moans, you really did, but he was fucking you so well and so deep that you couldn’t help it so thank god for the hand over your mouth as he fucked into you.

He pressed the side of his face into your hair, trying to contain his respective noises too but he sounded so loud in your ear. You grasped the couch tightly, feeling your nails even start to hurt as you felt your orgasm oncoming just from his cock.

Tears brimmed at the edge of your lash line as you moaned Steve’s name out in a muffled and broken voice, but you didn’t need to tell him you were about to come. He could feel your walls clenching down on him tighter, your body growing tense against him with every thrust that went slightly deeper than the one before.

“Go ahead, come all over my cock, baby, that’s it,” he told you breathlessly, “Oh fuck, that’s it- I can feel you.”

You mewled against his hand, feeling your walls start to spasm around him, and the intensity in your stomach twisted and turned as your orgasm built up until it finally snapped and you were cumming on his cock.

Steve had to force his own moan from feeling your walls flutter deliciously around him as you came, pressing his face into the crook of your neck, while still managing to keep himself contained because he might’ve come at the same exact time as you from this feeling.

His hold over your lips grew tighter, but you were still pretty loud as you came, shockwaves rocked through your entire body, so much that you swore you saw stars. Steve was shushing you in your ear at the same time as he slowed down his thrusts, letting you ride through your orgasm and your body still shaking because holy shit he was still fucking you.

Even with your vision blurry, and your body trembling from that mind-blowing orgasm, you could still feel his cock inside of you, thrusting at a lazy pace that made your eyes roll back and soft mewls to escape you parted lips.

It took you a second or two to realize Steve was saying something to you, but he sounded far away for a moment as the bursts of warmth still rocked through you, but you managed to hear him when you muttered something incoherent at him and he chuckled and repeated himself.

“Close your legs,” Steve told you as he slipped out of you and you did as told, thinking you were moving slower than normal when you actually did it quite fast.

Not a second after you felt his cock pressed into between your thighs, and you realized what he was doing. You pressed your thighs tighter around him, rocking back into him as his own moans got louder too. It was so fucking erotic, the feeling of his cock pressed between your closed thighs, feeling him grinding behind you as he desperately chased his own orgasm. He fucked between your thighs a few times, before he cursed loudly and pressed his chest into your back completely. With a moan of your name, he was coming for a second time.

His cum splattered all over your thighs, and unfortunately the couch as well, but mostly your thighs. It was hot against you, and you felt Steve press his face back into your hair and wrap both arms around you tightly as he panted and thrust his hips a few more times between your thighs, his own cum making it easier to slide back and forth.

His deep panting was hitting the back of your neck pleasantly, and you rubbed the back of your head on his with affection as his thrusts finally went still.

It took the both of you a few minutes to come down from your respective highs, your bodies pressed up against each other. When you did, Steve was lazily turning you around so that you could face him. You twisted around for him, your body feeling like there was a whole anvil on your chest or something.

When you managed to turn, you saw a dreamy smile on Steve’s lips and an adoring look in his gaze.

“Feeling better now?” You asked him again, and he was nodding, his messy locks of brown hair falling forward and you reached over to push them out of his face, “I’m glad I could help, honestly.”

You continued to play with his hair, something you’ve always wanted to do, and Steve licked his lips before he asked, “That wasn’t just to help me, was it?”

You met his gaze again, and said, “Well…I just heavily benefited from helping you.”

He scoffed at you before he grinned again and asked you smugly, “How long have you wanted me?” He paused, then added, “Please don’t say it was when I became a dad…”

You rolled your eyes at him as you rested your hand onto his cheek affectionately as you said, “No, it’s been way before that, when I said I wasn’t immune I meant just you.”

Steve was content with that answer, and then he saw something in your eyes before you continued to say, “I do have to admit though that…I’ve never been more attracted to you than I have been these past few months.”

He scoffed at you, but regardless smiled warmly at you. You returned it to him, and his eyes flickered down to your lips and his smile began to fall. You blinked at him, curious as to why he suddenly turned serious, afraid you’d said the wrong thing, until he was leaning in and capturing your lips with his like he wanted the moment you touched him, kissing you the way he had always wanted to.

You returned it, eyes fluttering shut as he kissed you soft and tenderly, causing more warmth than heat to erupt in your chest at the feeling of his lips consuming you entirely. His tongue slipped past your lips that parted for him, and you nearly melted on the spot…which was odd considering the events of the past hour or so.

After a good few seconds of your sweet kiss that made your heart flutter, he was leaning away to look at now with a very sleepy expression on his face. It made you smile, and you pecked him on the lips before you pressed your head into his chest and closed your eyes.

Steve wrapped an arm around you, feeling your legs entangling with each other as you both got comfortable on the couch, ready to fall asleep at any moment in this blissful embrace. And honestly, Steve felt thousands times better, and it was all thanks to you…and he hoped this wouldn’t be the last time and rather be the start of something else as his eyes fluttered shut…

Just as Steve closed his eyes, they were opening again. He found that he was alone on the couch. You were gone and there was a blue hue shining through the living room window, the way it always looked when he woke up to feed his son. He rubbed his eyes as he sat up, seeing he was in his sweats again and there was also a blanket thrown over him.

He wondered if it was a dream for a moment, but the ache in his body and the post bliss he felt all over him said otherwise. He was going to stand, and go to his son’s room when he saw you sitting on the lazy boy chair, the one that typically was covered with jackets and sometimes your bag, holding his son in your arms and holding a bottle to his mouth.

You were in a different outfit altogether, a pair of your own sweats, and a tank top, and you were looking at his son with such a warm stare that Steve could even see in the barely lit room. Steve smiled at the sight, and he settled back down onto the couch, and said in a sleepy voice, “I think Robin’s solution worked…but I wouldn’t mind doing it again.”

You lifted your eyes, taking a moment or two to realize that Steve was talking and what he said. You smirked gently and replied in a teasing voice, “Maybe take me out on a date first, and I’ll think about it.”

He smiled again as his eyes began to close again as he said, “Thursday night, I know a place…”

“It’s a date then, Steve,” you replied quietly, your eyes moving back to the baby in your arms. The last thing Steve saw before getting another hour or 2 of sleep was you smiling sweetly at his son in your arms.

#pls single dad steve has me a whole ass chokehold and i cant helpt but become undone #pls enjoy #i wrote it in what i can only describe as a fever dream #caused by a fair amount of iced coffee #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington smut #steve smut #reader insert #female reader #lys writes saucy things #single dad steve harrington #single daddy steve

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alter-ipse · 22 days

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Day 5

My ankle still hurts. I was taught never to complain, of course– back in school, complaining made you look weak, and weakness made you look like a target. The day I had the temerity to look tired after I finished up in the gym was the day I got ambushed in the locker room. It wasn’t as if they could do much to me– we all had the same standard-issue equipment, so I had nothing worth stealing– but most of my face was a ruin of bruises for weeks. It was midway through my first year, so my schoolmasters didn’t care. If anything, it let them know that they weren’t working me hard enough. I was going to replace a hero! I was going to have to kill a hero. If she was good, I had to be better. Didn’t I know how lucky I was to have this chance? I wouldn’t want to let them down, would I? So I got extra time as a punching bag in the sparring ring, and my classmates got to see my face turn all the colours of the rainbow. Call it a bonus art lesson.

Like I say, some people took the false memories a bit too well. Picture this: you’re a shining new person, blank as a sheet of paper. You have opened your eyes for the first time, to take in the most beautiful thing you have ever seen: the face of a human. The lab fluorescents glint off their goggles and illuminate their fly-away hair. They are ethereal and animate, and you don’t know what this world is but if it has more things like this in it, you want to discover it all. And they take your hand, and they lead you out of your pod and into a chair. They slide a sort of helmet over your head, and you’re not afraid, because you don’t know how to be afraid yet. So you lean back and watch the way the lights flicker across the consoles at the back of the room, miniature moving constellations laid out just for you. You’re sure they’ll tell you why you’re here in a moment. And then something hits your brain so hard your vision judders and blurs around the edges. You feel it like a physical pain, like somebody’s dropped a rock on your head, but you can’t worry about the agony because the information is already racing through your skull, faster than you can process. And there’s so much of it. You try to cling to a thought, any thought, but they all slip through your fingers like so many grains of sand, and your head spins. And then everything goes dark, and when you wake up, all you feel is deep, primal rage. It’s the anger of a person you didn’t know existed, but at that point, what’s the difference between their rage and yours?

Or so I imagine, anyway. I blacked out halfway through the information upload, but when I woke up, the memories were fuzzy and indistinct, disappearing as soon as I tried to catch hold of them.I realised that something was meant to have happened, except, apparently, it hadn’t.

I felt exactly the same as I had before, but that was clearly the wrong way to feel. I knew that from the second the doctor came over to ask how I was, with an expectant weight to her sentences. So I smiled hesitantly, and told her that it was all a bit strange, but I thought I’d be alright soon. Thank my intuition that I was assigned someone as drippy as Alter, and not somebody with an actual backbone. For the next few hours I smiled and nodded in all the right places, and once they fitted me out with a uniform they mostly left me to it.

I still don’t feel much these days, if I’m honest. I don’t know how that works– perhaps clones can only have feelings if they’re taken from natural humans. I’ve always considered it to be one of my strengths. After all, it was something like sentimentality that moved Alter to save me, and you’ve seen how that’s working out for her. All I am is my mission: simple, clean and uncomplicated. I can live or die by the orders of my creators, and that’s the way I like it. They seem to know what they’re doing, which is more than you can say for anyone around here.

#fiction #writing #creative writing #stories #storytelling #my writing #oc #ocs #my ocs #cw violence #cw doctors #cw pain

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iplaywithstring · 2 years

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So, I might be "in remission" with my ME/CFS.

it's in quotes because I don't actually know the criteria and I haven't talked to my doctor about it.

I had remission before - right after I was diagnosed in 2010, I started feeling better. Better as in I had been sleeping/resting/not active for about 18 hrs a day and then over the period of about two weeks I felt better and told my doctor my symptoms were gone. I was warned it could come back at any time, but I didn't listen. I did more and more and within a year I had taken up power lifting (2011). Shortly after that (fall 2012) I got a part time job. Within a few months (summer 2013) symptoms came back, I had to quit my job, and things got progressively worse.

There have been times since 2013 that I have been housebound. There have been times when I had about 4-6 "active" hours a day (where "active" meant anything from being on my feet to just being upright). After starting treatment for endometriosis I went through the diagnostic process a second time with the same results in 2017. I was prescribed stimulants to take as-needed on days when I needed to function in 2018.

Since 2019, I have been getting better at pacing - understanding my limits, not pushing myself, and actually resting. Early 2020, my husband went to Europe for 5 weeks, and I managed to take care of myself and my kids and the house without crashing (and did volunteer work!). When things shut down, I was able to sleep, rest, and be active according to how I felt instead of basing my activity on outside pressures. I really learned what pacing was and where my limits were.

in the fall of 2021 I went back to school - two days a week on site and two days a week online classes from home. Aside from a few bad days and not really leaving the house on the weekends, I managed without crashing. I started my full time on the job training three weeks ago (although full disclosure - I haven't actually worked full time - I've been sent home early at least once a week (because not all clients are comfortable having a student sit in on meetings) so it's not quite full time, but a lot more activity than I have been doing).

I'm waiting for the crash, but it hasn't happened. My husband reminds me that I'm not doing anything in the evenings - couch lump most of the time - but I am still doing a lot. Twice this week I was close to 10k steps, and I wake up the next day expecting to feel awful and I.....don't. My mind is working, my muscles and joints are....well, ok, they're sore, but OTC meds are taking care of it. My digestive system is working (this is a big deal!). I haven't had insomnia or other sleep difficulties. I haven't had random nausea or dizzyness or inability to function.

A friend of mine has reminded me that I'm likely riding on a lot of adrenaline, and she's not wrong, but I would expect the weekends to be bad if that was what was keeping me going. Instead, I'm...fine? Like today is Saturday and I woke up on my own around 8 and instead of napping in the afternoon I went for a 3k walk (slowly, on flat ground) - this is after doing some cleaning. And then I spent the rest of the day mostly sitting/reclining and feeling pretty tired. But just tired, not ill, not sensitive to sound, not having temperature regulation problems, just sitting on the couch relaxing (ok, under a blanket, but still, no chills or blue lips).

So now I'm wondering if I've actually just been faking for the past 10 years or if I was actually just lazy and wasting my life, or if I'm going to wake up one day and just be a mess. This is really happy and exciting news, but I feel really......insecure? about the whole thing. Last time I had a remission I went to therapy because it brought up a ton of things I had to work through - identity issues, who I am, what I want, etc. - and in the end it was positive but it was definitely a crisis point.

I want to believe that I am just understanding my limits and somehow not going past my ability, but it's really hard not to bounce back and forth between "oh no when am I going to crash" and "obviously I'm a fraud". It's been a trip, folks.

#me/cfs #chronic fatigue #chronic fatigue syndrome #chronic illness #not going to lie it's a struggle #can I call myself chronically ill when I'm functioning like a healthy person?#(except I do have symptoms they're just not debilitating anymore so they don't count?)#it's a bit of a mindfuck honestly #thankful and terrified

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chaosandcuddlesblog · 11 months

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I finished high school with the highest honors and went to college at my dream university. All while serving my community as a youth representative. Long story short, I was on top of my game. A bright future was expected of me. But things took a turn when I got pregnant only a couple of months after graduating college.

For the entire duration of the pregnancy, I thought that it would be easy for me to get back on track career-wise thinking that I have all the qualifications. I am degree holder with years of serving the community hence a semi professional work experience. But motherhood is so much more than I expected it to be. It was a lot of work. Sometimes a little too much that it drains me.

Being a mother reminded me of how important it is for me to have a career. But at the same time, I might have unconsciously used it as an excuse to be stagnant career-wise. Rationalizing not having a career as a normal and automatic sacrifice of motherhood. But of course, I had to make ends meet, so I was able to still find a job so I'd have a source of income. I earn not as much as I hoped to, but just enough to pay the bills. Just when I was doing something that at one moment I thought I could make an incredible career with, baby fever overruled me, and I decided to have a baby again. Due to health concerns, childbearing meant another career pause for me.

A quarter after giving birth, I am back on track to finding a job. This time I am trying to find a job that pays me enough to sustain two kids and is flexible enough so I can still be a hands-on mom. I am also looking for one that will keep me mentally sane and make me grow professionally. I have submitted a few applications, and I've received feedback on only a few of them. To be honest, it frustrates me. I always perceived myself as an achiever. Someone any employer would be interested in. However, reflecting on how my life has been in the past 5 years, I've come to the realization that maybe I am not, or at least, I no longer am.

This entire process of finding a job that would give me the opportunity to professionally grow while being the mother that I aspire to be is harder than I thought. But more importantly, it has been humbling me. The process has been telling me to put my feet back on the ground. Telling me how much I should be working on myself. And this is very frustrating for someone who's used to getting what she wants in a snap.

I know that some of the coming days will be even more frustrating. I don't know what to do with this fact, but this is a good start, right? Acknowledging that I am feeling frustrated and acknowledging that I have things to work on with myself is a good thing, right?

I guess that's all for entry one. This mama needs to take a nap before either of the kids wake up and yes, good luck with my interview this morning.

**About the photos | pic 1: a quick snap before a job interview. Went to our shop's stockroom to avoid noise but ended up in a noisier one; pic 2: what I looked like after more than an hour of interview. Pumping my breastmilk because my ~~ are engorged and unsafe for little one to latch.

#motherhood #momlife #postpartum #parenthood #career woman #mom guilt #workingmom

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thatsmeif · 1 year

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5 letters to fall.

What if love hurts more than it seems ? What if we fantasied more than we should on the meaning of this venomous word ?

What does love even mean?

It wasn't even the beginning of the summer vacation that I already felt like it was the end. It's been months that i’ve been stuck in this room, in the middle of my thoughts without any escape. I'm still waiting on my side of the bed hoping, just in case that you’ll come back, ending this bad dream.

“ It’s just a little cut, it’ll heal.”

No, it's a massive bleeding wound in my heart left lonely for too long. Here I am talking to a picture on my wall of your smile going away as each day passes.

Love, what a word.

Get over it, it was just a phase.

I guess it is.

No, like really. You’re just making a fuss about it.

I'm not !

You are ! What if people still talk about you still going through his texts even if Chris and you broke up, like two years ago?

Why do you always need to hurt people out of context?

Because you’re hurting me too, can’t you get it?

College is really an overrated thing. Life feels more like a spinning wheel. Wake up, study, feel too tired to be alive, sleep.

Then I saw you, there, standing at the end of the hallway, looking at me like a piece of art.

Who said that we’ll talk to each other again? Nobody, I guess. But your eyes were begging for me to open my mouth to you again. It was insane how we always got into each other's way. Not when you left the side of the bed empty that night. I still remember it as if it was yesterday. And I, on the other side, still sleep on my side of the bed hoping that you'll come back one night.

There’s three type of people when it comes to love.

1 : The one that falls for someone once, and thinks for years it’s them or nothing.

2 : The one that wants love, but waits for it to come by itself and isn’t expecting too much.

3 : And finally, the one that rejects love at all costs.

Many of my friends told me to get over him because there’s no point in it. So I spent countless nights thinking about it. I mean, he was a really sweet guy to me. He used to buy me gifts whenever I was feeling down and comfort me, or write me a letter to make me feel better. I would talk to him for hours about my day, and listen to him as well. But this was before we broke up. It was because he was too scared of the distance between our colleges and that we wouldn't have a lot of time to be together and that our relationship would change. It was the last day before the last year of high school. Even though I cried many times before, it still hurts as much even now.

Well, I thought that maybe life was meant like this.

Until I saw his hazel eyes at the end of the hallway.

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justice4canyonmoon · 3 years

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Watermelon Sugar, Hi

Summary: On your 18th birthday, a clock appears on your wrist, counting down the time until you met your soulmate. Or, how operating cameras on the Watermelon Sugar set was the best job you ever accepted.

Notes: Hi!!! I’ve missed writing so much, but now that college is done for the semester, I’m back at it!! My last soulmate AU was v soft and fluffy, so I wanted to do one that was a little more...spicy. And since Watermelon Sugar has been winning lots of awards lately, I thought it would be a good subject. I also tried writing Harry’s dialogue a little different so it better captured his accent, so let me know if that actually worked lol. Hope you like it!!!

Warnings: smut!! 18+ only!!! vaginal fingering, hand jobs, a little dry humping, cursing, mostly dom! harry but a sprinkling of sub! harry too

WC: 4.8 k

January 6th, 2012

Turning 18 was a right of passage. It meant finally being an adult. That in most countries, you were old enough to drink. It meant graduating from high school and moving on to bigger and better things. Soon, the responsibility of your life would soon lie squarely on your shoulders. And, most importantly, your clock appears.

Everyone on earth had one. On your 18th birthday, a clock appears on your right wrist, counting down the time until you met the person meant for you. When the two of you would finally meet in person, it would beep, like an alarm clock, and you’d know for sure that you were meant to be. And in 2012, it was finally your year. You hoped that you were one of the lucky few that had mere minutes until your first meeting, but most likely, you would join the many who had quite a few years. The anticipation was killing you; ever since you had started your teen years, you were desperate for the day you would finally get your clock. That desperation could only be second to waiting for the day you actually meet them.

And now, the day you got your clock had finally arrived! You woke up at exactly 5:13 am, too anxious and excited to sleep well. When you looked down at your wrist, you gasped. It looked like a tattoo, the black ink that depicted a digital watch now etched into your skin. The small white lettering along the bottom read “years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds” from left to right. Above the lettering were bold white numbers, slowly ticking down.

8 Years, 0 Months, 3 Weeks, 1 Day, 2 Hours, 32 Minutes, 14 Seconds

Eight years. You sighed, not able to help being just a bit disappointed. Sure, you expected it to be a few years. But by a few, you were thinking three or four. Not eight! Though you were a bit downtrodden, you knew that the fates knew what they were doing. If eight years was what they wanted for you, then you would accept it, and be very excited for when the time arrived!

January 30th, 2020

The past eight years of your life were, in all honesty, not too shabby. After getting a degree in film, you moved to Malibu, California, and worked cameras for various commercials, music videos, and movies in the business. It was pretty cool, getting to be behind the scenes for so many interesting projects. Out of the three of them, you definitely preferred music videos. Movies, though really cool, were far too long, and commercials were kind of bland. And you got to hear music from some of your favorite artists, which was really cool!

Today was no exception to that. It was 4 am (you had to wake up early on shoot days to go set up), and you were yanking on light blue jeans, a yellow Fine Line t-shirt, and a lavender sweatshirt, thinking about how excited you were to help film Watermelon Sugar. You were a big fan of Harry’s music, and you couldn’t wait to work with him! You, of course, already knew the video’s concept, so ideas on how to film the scenes with the various models and fruit were running through your head. You were so lost in thought that you almost forgot to look down at your wrist.

0 Years, 0 Months, 0 Weeks, 0 Days, 3 Hours, 45 Minutes, 53 Seconds

You almost screamed in excitement, but managed to hold back; you didn’t think your neighbors would appreciate your excited outburst. You had almost totally forgotten that today was the day! And since the video shoot was starting at 8 am sharp, you had to be meeting your other half on the set! Maybe it was one of the beautiful models that would be making an appearance, maybe one of the sound engineers, or maybe one of the runners. No matter who it was, you couldn’t wait! Eight years had been far too long of a time to wait. You briefly reconsidered your dressed down attire, but figured you’d need the sweatshirt for the breezy morning on the beach. And since you were behind the camera, you didn’t really need to look like a movie star.

You ate a quick breakfast and practically sprinted out of the door. You carried your two duffel bags loaded with all of the essentials (some equipment was provided, but you also brought some of your own stuff) and stuffed them into the trunk, flung the car door open, shoved the key into the ignition, and drove as fast as you were able to without getting pulled over. When you pulled up to the shoot location a short time later, you glanced down at your clock once more.

0 Years, 0 Months, 0 Weeks, 0 Days, 3 Hours, 17 Minutes, 20 Seconds

Slowly but surely, it was getting closer. Soon, though, the thoughts on the forefront of your mind were how to set up the cameras for the shoot, talking with the director about what shots you needed for each of the scenes, and introducing yourself to the other members of the crew. You already knew one of the other cameramen, Jonathan; you two had worked together on a music video for Little Mix before, so you chatted with him for a little while.

You hadn’t even realized how many hours had ticked by when the on-camera talent began to show up. The models were beginning to get settled on the beach, strewn about in a perfectly thought-out way. Harry had arrived as well; you don’t know how you didn’t notice that, given that his outfit, consisting of a red striped shirt, a scarf, and ripped blue jeans, stuck out from the swimsuit-clad models. He was going around, greeting every single member of the crew. Suddenly, you remembered the little white numbers on your wrist, and risked a glance down.

0 Years, 0 Months, 0 Weeks, 0 Days, 0 Hours, 2 Minutes, 14 Seconds

Your heart leapt out of your chest. Your palms began to sweat, and your hands shook harder than they ever had in your life. In two minutes, you would finally meet the love of your life. It had to be one of the models, didn’t it? You had met every member of the crew already, so it definitely wasn’t one of them. You wiped your palms on your jeans and steadied the camera you were positioned at, trying to find something to do with your hands.

1 Minute, 27 Seconds

Jonathan came over to you and asked a question about the shot, something about how quickly he should zoom out. You barely were able to respond, too focused on what you knew was about to transpire.

0 Minutes, 52 Seconds

Holy shit. You were going to throw up. You had never been more excited, yet terrified in your life.

30 Seconds

Harry was greeting the camera operator that was stationed beside you, and as Jonathan walked away a short time later, Harry approached you.

1 Second

Wait. There was no way-

“Hello! ‘M Harry! Thank you f’ bein’ here, I appreciate it very much!��

No fucking way. Literally no way. You had been waiting your entire life for Harry Styles? Your clock had to be making a mistake. But you heard the telltale beep coming from your wrist, and if you listened hard enough, you could hear his, too. You were fully expecting to wake up from a dream, or for Fate to pop up saying “Oops, just kidding! I messed up, let me fix your clock for you, dear.” But nothing like that came. Instead, you locked eyes with the handsome brunet in front of you. His gaze was intense, yet kind; if he was going to look at you like that for your entire life, you think you might faint.

“Thank you for the opportunity! I’m honestly a pretty big fan of yours,” you admitted.

The warm smile on his face grew wider, “Thank you, love! On another note, did your clock jus’ run out?”

You nodded, the lump in your throat preventing you from speaking. He reached for your right hand, skimming one of his long fingers over the clock that had just ticked down its final seconds. Gently, he tugged your wrist up to his lips and brushed them over the area, making you shiver. Though it was a bit breezy on the beach, you knew that this wasn’t from the chill.

“I’ve been waiting eight years f’ this,” he murmured against your skin, “probably the best early birthday present I’ve ever gotten.”

“I-I’ve been waiting eight years, too,” you whispered, wanting to keep the moment as between the two of you as possible.

He lowered your wrist back to your side, but linked his fingers with yours, rubbing soothing circles across the back of your trembling hand with his thumb.

“S’ okay, love. Don’ need to be nervous. ’M really happy t’ finally meet you. What’s y’ name?”

You gave it to him and he grinned, “‘M name’s Harry! Of course, you already knew that, but it feels like I should introduce m’self. Feels right in the moment. Anyway, it’s really nice t’ meet you!”

You giggled softly, his goofy personality already putting you a bit more at ease, “It’s really nice to meet you, too.”

“Styles! Need you on set!” shouted the director, popping the bubble the two of you had found yourselves in.

Harry wrapped you in the tightest hug he could muster and remarked, “Wish y’ were on camera instead of behind it. Love to have y’ there.”

You could feel your face grow warm as he freed you from his embrace. He pressed a light kiss to your cheek before jogging on set, amongst all of the models. You could hardly believe it! This had to be some kind of fever dream. But when you pinched yourself, you didn’t wake up. You had really met your soulmate, and it was really Harry Styles!

Throughout the shoot, Harry shot rather suggestive glances your way. He wiggled his eyebrows, winked at you, bit his lip, and when he sang “I want your belly,” he looked directly into your eyes, making your neutral expression falter from the intensity of his gaze. He was getting to you, and he knew it. When you took a break for lunch, he flirted shamelessly, making sure you knew how beautiful he thought you were. Between the flirtatious comments, though, the two of you started to really get to know each other; the goofy side of his personality that he showed earlier started to shine through, and you didn’t think you had ever laughed as much as you did today. A future with him didn’t seem so far-fetched to you anymore.

At the end of the shoot day, after filming Harry and the models running around the beach at sunset, you were packing your two duffle bags into the trunk of your car. The heavier one was lying on the ground, and you were lifting the other one into the trunk.

“Wan’ any help w’ those?”

You jumped, almost dropping the bag in your hands “Geez, Harry, you scared me.”

He grinned sheepishly, grabbing your other equipment bag and placing it in the trunk, “Sorry, love. Though y’ heard me comin.”

“It’s fine. And thank you,” you gestured toward the bag he put in the trunk.

He waved, “S’ no problem. Gotta help m’ soulmate out. Speaking of which, y’ doing anything tonight’? I’d love t’ get to know y’ even better.”

The suggestive glance he was throwing in your direction told you what exactly he meant by “getting to know you.” And honestly, with the way he had been looking at you all day, it was a miracle that you didn’t jump him already!

“I’d like that. I live fairly close to here if you’d want to come to mine,” you suggested.

Though you were sure he was living out of a swanky hotel, if this was going where you thought it was going, you wanted your first time with your soulmate to be in one of your homes. And yes, maybe your apartment was small compared to the estates you were sure he owned, but you knew you would feel more comfortable at your place.

His dimpled grin turned into a smirk, “Sounds good t’ me, love. Lead the way.”

You typed your address into his GPS, just in case the two of you got separated on the drive to your place. Though your place was only 20 minutes away, it took nearly twice that with traffic! It’s like the universe knew how desperately you wanted to get home! Thankfully, you made it back, and Harry wasn’t too far behind, pulling into the space beside you at your apartment complex.

You exited your car and popped the trunk, grabbing one of your bags. Harry seemingly materialized out of nowhere and took the other bag for you. You thanked him and he grinned in response, reaching for your hand with his free one and linking his fingers with yours. You smiled bashfully and gently tugged him up the stairs and to the front door of your apartment.

“Have any roommates we have to worry abou’?” he questioned.

You shook your head, “Jasmine’s visiting family in Canada for a few weeks, so we’ll have the place to ourselves!”

He leaned down so he was level with your ear and tugged on the lobe, murmuring, “Good. Don’ think she’d like listening to what I plan on doin t’ ya.”

You didn’t think you had ever been more grateful that your roommate was out of town.

Harry licked the shell of your ear, then moved to press kisses to the side of your neck as you attempted to get your keys out of the side pocket of your equipment bag. Harry was making it very difficult, but you managed to find them and wrench it into the door of your apartment. Harry stopped his teasing when you gestured for him to enter your apartment. It was a decent size for the rent; the living area was open concept, with the kitchen to the right and the living room to the left. The kitchen had brown cabinets lining the wall, and there was a small island in the space. The living room was furnished with a couch, loveseat, and ottoman, as well as a coffee table. The TV was mounted on the wall, and below it was a terrarium, where your pet snake, Leia Corngana, named after your favorite Star Wars character, lived. Off of the living room, there was a balcony (you lived on the third floor), where you had two chairs and a small table. It was quaint, and more than enough space for both you and your roommate. You couldn’t help but feel a bit insecure, though, since you knew Harry’s place was definitely much bigger.

“Y’ apartment’s nice. It’s homey, I quite like it,” Harry complemented, glancing at the pictures of both you and your roommate’s families on the walls.

You smiled appreciatively, “Thank you! Would you like a drink? Something to eat? All I have in terms of alcohol is cheap wine, but you can have some if you’d like.”

You both knew that the offer was just a formality, but you still asked.

“Maybe next time, love. ‘M a bit too impatient,” he declined.

You nodded and took his hand, leading him down the hallway. You passed by the bathroom, hall closet, laundry room, and your roommate’s bedroom until you reached yours at the end of the hall. It was the bigger of the two bedrooms; you and Jasmine had flipped a coin for it and you just happened to win. On the wall opposite the door, there were two small windows, and you quickly closed the blinds. Though you were on the third floor, you didn’t want to risk anyone seeing what was about to occur. One wall was mostly covered by the closet, and across from the closet was your bed, with the headboard against the wall. A nightstand sat between your bed and the window. The walls were painted a dull white (you weren’t allowed to do any painting), but you made up for it with the colorful posters and tapestries that adorned them.

Harry closed the door behind you, but didn’t lock it, given that the two of you were alone. His eyes met yours from across the room and you swallowed hard. Now you were wishing that you had worn something a little nicer; your attire wasn’t exactly sexy, and you thought he might find it weird that you were wearing his merch under your sweatshirt. Oh well, no turning back now.

Harry crossed the room, almost akin to a lion stalking his prey. His movements were utterly hypnotizing, and you couldn’t bring yourself to look away. His on set clothing was long discarded for a pair of grey sweatpants and a t-shirt, neither of which left much to the imagination. In this moment, you were grateful for that, admiring the way the shirt was stretched across his pecs and how you could clearly see the beginnings of a bulge forming through his pants. He stopped when he was directly in front of you, and he tilted your chin up so you were looking him in the eye.

“Are y’ sure this is something y’ want? Don’ wanna push anything if you’d rather wait,” he asked seriously.

You swallowed again and nodded, “I do. I really do, Harry.”

That was all the confirmation he needed before his lips were on yours.

Everytime someone talked about kissing your soulmate for the first time, they said that you would feel sparks, that your stomach would turn into butterflies, and you’d be hard pressed to find another feeling that matches it. You had always thought that sentiment was rather cheesy, but when Harry kissed you, everything they said was 100% true. Your stomach was fluttering, and you knew that nothing else in your life had ever made you feel like this. You melted into the contact, draping your arms around his neck and throwing every fiber of your being into the kiss. You felt him smile against your lips, and his arms snaked around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. This first kiss was sweet and loving; no move was made to deepen it, all the two of you wanted was to feel your soulmate’s lips against yours.

Unfortunately, you were the first to pull away, needing to catch your breath.

Harry cocked a lopsided grin at you, “Don’ think I’ve ever felt anything like that before.”

“Me neither,” you replied, returning his grin, “it was just as good as I heard it would be, no matter how cheesy it sounds.”

He chuckled and brushed his thumb over your cheek, “Definitely. Honestly would be fine to jus’ kiss y’, but I have better plans for us.”

You took his wrist and guided his thumb to your mouth, sucking on the digit and delighting in the way his eyes darkened with lust.

“Dirty little thing, aren’t y’?” he murmured, pushing his pointer finger in to join his thumb, “how do y’ look s’ fuckin hot just suckin on ‘m fingers?”

He pushed his fingers a little deeper into your mouth, drawing a whine from your lips. You could already feel the heat rushing between your thighs, clenching them together slightly to try and relieve some of the tension.

Harry smirked at you and returned his fingers to your hips, pulling you in for another kiss. If the first one was soft and sweet, this one was exactly the opposite. It was utterly filthy, your toes curling in the Vans you were still wearing as his tongue licked into your mouth. You couldn’t stop the whimpers from falling from your lips even if you tried, especially when his hands travelled downwards to cup your ass. He guided you to stand against the wall, already towering over you as he pressed you into the surface, a few groans of his own gasped out against your lips. You could already feel his hard-on pressing into your core through his sweatpants; the feeling was already making you embarrassingly wet. And when his hips ground into yours, sweet moans escaped your lips as you met him halfway. Soon, his lips disconnected from yours only to attach to your neck. He trailed kisses down the surface, and when he reached the base, he sucked a dark mark into the skin. You whined his name as he punctuated the mark with a slow grind of his hips and a calculated squeeze to your ass. Your fingers were clutching at his shoulders, and even through his shirt, you were sure you would leave a mark.

“Harry, please,” you gasped, hardly knowing what you were begging for, but knowing you needed him to touch you more.

You felt him smirk against your skin as he murmured, “What d’ y’ need, ‘m love? I’ll give y’ anything if y’ ask nicely f’ it.”

Fuck. You had never really been into the whole dominant act with any previous sexual partners (it was common to sleep with other people so that by the time you found your soulmate, you knew the sex would actually be good instead of being fumbling virgins), but somehow, on Harry, you found it scorchingly hot. Your pussy was throbbing with need, personifying your desperation. At first, you weren’t quite sure what to beg for, but when you felt his hands give your ass another harsh squeeze, just thinking about his fingers gave you your answer.

“W-want your fingers, Harry. P-please, n-need you to t-touch me so badly.”

You had never been this close to incoherent so early in a sexual encounter before. You knew your soulmate already held you in a tight grip, even though you had only met that same day!

“Need me t’ touch y’, lovie? Need me t’ stretch that pretty pussy open with m’ fingers?” he taunted, brushing his fingers over the fabric of your jeans.

“Please, please Harry,” you begged.

“Okay, love. All y’ needed t’ do was ask. Should get y’ out of these pesky clothes first, though,” he relented, not wanting to tease too much.

He released his hold on your ass, moving his hands up to remove your sweatshirt. You nearly forgot what shirt you were wearing until the sweatshirt was removed and he was smirking at you, his own merch adorning your body.

“Like your shirt,” he gently teased.

“Oh, shut up,” you groaned, “didn’t exactly think that you’d see it.”

“It’s flattering, love. Suppose y’ did say y’ were a fan,” you could see the gears turning in his head as he finished his response, “might keep that on y’. It’d be kinda hot to fuck m’ girl in m’ merch.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes, “Someone’s got an ego.”

He smirked, “I think I’ve earned it.”

Though he kept the shirt on, he kneeled down and removed the Vans you had forgotten to take off. You shivered when he looked up at you, a heat in his eyes that you had never seen before as he unzipped your jeans and slowly slid them down your legs, revealing them to him. Teasingly, he trailed feather-light kisses up your left calf, stopping at the top of your thigh and giving your right leg the same treatment. By the time he stood up, you were absolutely soaked, the wet patch on the front of your panties giving away how desperate you were.

Instead of taking off your panties like you expected, he just pushed them to the side and tracing his finger up your slit, smirking to himself as he felt the wetness there.

“S’ wet f’ me already,” he murmured, bringing his now wet finger up to his mouth and licking it off, “taste s’ sweet, lovie.”

You whimpered as he returned his finger to your core and finally pushed it inside of you. His other hand gripped your hip, digging his fingers into the supple flesh as he fingered you slowly, wanting to draw it out as much as possible. You were gushing around his finger, your hands digging into the fabric of his t-shirt to ground yourself as he worked you over. Sounds you had never even heard yourself make before were spilling from your lips on their own accord, and Harry was drinking them in. He crooked his finger inside of you, relishing in your shaky moan.

“P-please, Har. N-need more, p-please,” you whined, tiring of his slow pace.

“Suppose I did say I’d give y’ whatever y’ wanted if y’ asked nicely,” he said casually, pretending to think it over as he sunk a second finger into your heat.

Your knees wobbled and you threw your head back, nearly slamming it into the wall as the pleasure increased tenfold. But even in your slightly hazy state, you knew that you wanted to give Harry something, too. So, you blindly reached for his sweatpants, tugging them down and shoving your hand into his briefs. He moaned lowly, his motions in your pussy faltering slightly as you gripped his length in your hands and began stroking it. Even though you couldn’t see his dick, you could tell it was big, bigger than any that you had had before. You circled your finger around the tip, collecting the pre-cum that had begun bubbling out and used it for a bit of lubrication, returning to stroking his shaft.

“Fuck, baby. Y’ hand feels s’ much better than mine,” he gasped out.

You felt your face grow warm from the praise and sped up your motions, relishing in the groan that tore itself from his chest. By now, Harry had collected himself slightly, and continued pumping his fingers in and out of your pussy as his lips met yours in a sloppy kiss. You whimpered into the kiss, barely able to reciprocate as the pleasure shot through your body. You were so fucking close, you could feel your release bubbling in your tummy.

“So close, Harry,” you gasped into his mouth.

“Me too, lovie. Y’ hand just feels s’ good,” he moaned in response, redoubling his efforts in your pussy.

Even though you knew it was coming, your orgasm still took you by surprise when he swiped his thumb over your clit. Your legs trembled as you moaned into his mouth, dripping down his fingers and ruining your panties. You tried to keep moving your hand, but the intensity of your orgasm forced you to stop your motions as the pleasure washed over you. Harry worked you through it, murmuring soft things about how good you were for him, and how pretty you looked when you came.

When you finally came down from your high, you knew you had to help Harry reach his. Your other hand tugged his briefs down his thick thighs, revealing his cock. You never knew a cock could be pretty, but his was, long and thick and ridiculously hard. The head was red and throbbing with need, precum still spilling out. You swiped your thumb over the head again, relishing in the squeak that escaped his lips.

“B-baby,” he gasped, “please make me cum.”

You smirked a little bit, enjoying how pliant he had become, “Need me to make you cum, sweetheart? Need me to keep pumping your cock?”

“Y-yes. Fuck, need it s’ bad. P-please,” he whined.

“You’re so pretty like this, begging me to cum,” you whispered, “loved it when you were telling me what to do, but I think you like me being in charge just as much.”

He nodded wildly, “Yes, y-yes. I do, lovie. S’ much.”

You sped up your motions, making him cry out, “Then, do it, Harry. Cum for me.”

His eyes closed and he whined your name as he came to his high, his head slumping onto your shoulder. You worked him through it, telling him how good he had been for you. When he came down from his high, he brushed his lips against yours. This kiss was much more like the first one, gentle and loving.

When you pulled back, you looked into the moss green of his eyes as he said, “That was so good, love.”

You nodded in agreement, “It really was.”

“Give me a minute, then we can go for Round 2? Really wanna taste y’, lovie,” Harry suggested.

You nodded and kissed him again. You knew that you were in for a long night. It was about time the two of you made up for the eight long years you had to wait for each other.

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles blurb #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #dom!harry #sub!harry #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic

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shawn-is-my-giant-jellybean · 3 years

Text

ONLY WANT YOU.

Pairing : Shawn Mendes × reader

Genre : Angst, smut, fluff

Warnings : Swearing, Daddy kink, thigh riding, unprotected sex, dom!Shawn, Self depreciation(very mild), oral (male receiving)

Summary : The reader and Shawn have an intense argument and then Shawn let's the reader know who's the one he wants.

You were more than worried now. It had been precisely 2 hours 14 minutes since Shawn left. You really managed to send him over the edge. You didn't want to. You didn't mean it. But you can't help it when all of the world is pining for what's not true. He's yours but no, everyone wants him and camila to be together.

Camila was such a lovely lady. You couldn't help but feel insecure. She was everything you'd want to be. Hell, she was beautiful and the worst part you wanted to hate her but you couldn't. She had that aura.

You and Shawn were in it for long. That's what you thought at least. You knew he was the one for you. And you believed you were too for him until recently.

Ever since the PR began after Senorita was out you couldn't help but question everything. Your bond with Shawn seemed to weaken. You found yourself distancing from him. You didn't want to. You never did. Everytime you saw an article in some shitty tabloid your breath got caught. You felt you couldn't breathe. You knew it was fake but guess these two were really good actors cause it didn't seem unreal it to you.

You tried to calm yourself. Remind yourself you were overanalysing the sitch. He is your boyfriend. He will be home soon. Then you can be in his strong arms and feel safe and secure. But none of it worked.

All this while, since the PR managers suggested this, Shawn had made sure to get you involved. Let you be a part of everything that's been happening or is going to in future. Make sure you're comfortable with it. And boy, did you say yes cause you didn't wanna hold him down. But now when he was not with you for the holidays, when he had to fly out every weekend to Miami you felt your nerves kick in.

You hated yourself for being such a hypocrite. Shawn never once made you feel secluded but your overthinker ass ravaged everything.

You were certain he hated you now. This was the longest you two had gone without talking after that intense a fight.

Shawn was back home after three months. You were so excited for him to be with you for a whole week now, until you saw that article. You knew it meant nothing but seeing your boyfriend sticking his tongue down another women's throat got the best of you. You didn't think it was going to affect you so bad when you said yes to the whole PR stuff but now you just didn't know how to feel.

You never told Shawn when your anxiety kicked in seeing him with her because you didn't want to seem like a hypocrite. But weren't you one?

You just suffered quietly. Tried to let it pass. It'd end soon. That's how you always calmed your raging nerves. You became quieter. Stopped being your bubbly self when Shawn called. He obviously noticed. He knew you better than you yourself. He just couldn't figure the issue cause you had so convincingly persuaded him to believe you were fine with it all.

"Hun, I'm home. " Shawn said as he closed the door after settling his luggage beside the shoe cabinet right at the entrance of your shared apartment.

When he got no response he was stressed. He expected you to pounce on him as soon as he opened the gate but there was no sign of you.

He kicked his shoes off and then remembered how it'd annoy you so much, laughed to himself and went back to put them in the cabinet before calling out for you again.

"Y/N, baby I'm home. "

He checked the living room. You weren't there. The kitchen next. No sign of you anywhere. He didn't expect you to be asleep cause it was just 7 and you were a night owl getting all pumped with energy as the clock hit 6 pm. This was your best time of the day and Shawn certainly had decided to make the best of it but you were nowhere to be found.

He wouldn't lie he was disappointed when you didn't fling yourself into his arms and peppered his face with cute wet kisses and were all clingy and lovey with him. He missed you so much.

He went to your bedroom, your shared room. Checked the whole house but there was no sign of you. He felt all that excitement dial down.

He decided to call you, obviously.

You didn't pick up.

He was worried now. He called your best friend cause you usually liked to hangout with her at evenings like this, discussing your medical school stuff and just chilling at times. She didn't pick up either. He called your mom and she told him that you were out with Y/F/N and she thought that he already knew.

Shawn was more than upset. He felt a little angry because you had been acting so not yourself and this was the least he could expect from you. There was something wrong obviously but why wouldn't you talk to him. Every time he tried to talk, you'd just make some excuse. He was tired now and this was what sent him over the edge. He tried calling you after an hour again. Just to get back a text saying "I'll be home late. Dinner's in the fridge. Don't wait for me. "

He was pissed off. Really bad.

You came home around 10:30 at night. You knew this wasn't fair to Shawn. After you saw that article you just couldn't. You had to let some seam off. Y/F/N called you and asked you if you'd wanna come to a small party they were throwing for Tom, a batchmate of yours Shawn had a huge disliking towards. Tom had asked you out cause he didn't know you had a boyfriend and he made it very clear that he liked you a lot. Shawn didn't take that well, obviously. He hated Tom's guts.

You wanted to get on his nerves after seeing the article. So you did.

You put on your sexiest one piece Shawn got for you year on your graduation day. The nerve of you. You informed your mom cause you knew Shawn would call her as you didn't plan on picking up his phone.

You opened the door with your key. The click noise made Shawn wake up from his light slumber.

You knew you had pulled off real shit and well consequences weren't gonna be good.

As you went inside. You saw the food was out on the counter but untouched. Shawn was in the living room, glaring at you.

"Where were you, Y/N? " He asked you with a voice dangerously low sending chills down your spine.

But heh you had enough liquid courage to be a douche at this point.

"Hello to you too. " You said in a rude tone.

"I said where the fuck were you, Y/N? It's been three goddamn hours. I have been so stressed what the hell is wrong with you. You didn't even care to tell me yourself. What the fuck?" He snapped at you moving towards you in the kitchen where you were pouring some water for yourself.

" I was at Tom's birthday party with Y/F/N." You said non chalantly.

His eyes shot up. Going wide.

" So you decided to go to that fucker's party instead of being with me. I'm home after three fucking months for fuck's sake." He yelled from across the counter.

You flinched hearing his tone but snapped right back. "Well what am I supposed to do Shawn? Sit here like a fool while you stick your tongue down her throat. All I see are pictures of you two making out every fucking where so am I just supposed to fucking wait for you after getting ten thousand notifications showing my boyfriend and his fucking girlfriend!? "

He took in a deep breath as if to not do anything wrong. The change on his face was scary. He just went from angry and worried to nothing. His face went expressionless. The tension getting thicker with every passing second.

You realised how wrong you were instantly. Hands flying to cover your mouth. " Shawn, i-... I am.. I didn't mean it. Bab-"

"You fucking meant it, Y/N. I can't even. You've got to be kidding me. " He took his Jeep's keys and headed for the gate. You tried to stop him by touching his shoulder but the look he gave you made you feel disgusted with yourself. He slammed the gate as he went out. Tears made their way down your cheeks smudging all your make up.

You sank down right where you were beside the kitchen counter. You hated yourself in this moment more than you ever had. The one person who always put your needs first, cared for you more than himself, you managed to make him hate you. You were certain he did.

You ran took your phone called Shawn. Over and over again. 5 calls went unanswered. You were perturbed. Didn't know what to do. Didn't know where he could be. You wanted to just be in his arms. You didn't deserve it but you felt home. His arms were your home. And you just ruined it all. Your baseless insecurities did.

You sat there helpless, loathing yourself. You don't know when sleep took over you. When you woke up it was 12. You got up in haste, drowning in worry. It had been an hour and a half since he left. You called him again and again to no avail. You lost the best thing you ever had and you knew you wouldn't be able to live with yourself after what you did.

You decided leaving was the best. He anyway wouldn't want you near him. Shawn deserved the world. He deserved the best. And then there was you who gave him nothing but hurled insults at him.

Tears didn't stop flowing at a point you felt you didn't have anymore left but you were wrong. You went up to your bedroom. Taking out a suitcase. You didn't want to bother him more. You weren't worth it.

You put in your essentials in the bag, moving to the closet after that. You changed into one of your hoodies. It was his. All of your clothes were basically his. You needed to wear them to feel home when he wasn't around. He loved them on you but now you weren't so sure. You anyway did it. One hoodie wouldn't upset him.

As you were done packing you checked the time it was over 2 hours. You wanted to die right at this moment. Shawn was not picking up your calls. You called Geoff earlier, he had no idea where Shawn was. Now you decided to call Karen. You didn't know what to do. You had already asked Andrew if Shawn was at the studio. You didn't want to stress everywhere cause Shawn didn't get mad easily but when he did it was bad. Extremely bad.

Just as you were about to call Karen you felt yourself being turned around, moved towards the closet door, a pair of strong arms pulling you and then his warm swollen lips being attached to yours. You melted right then. You didn't know how to respond. You couldn't believe it. Were you dreaming? But as you let it sink in, it was your Shawn kissing you. His smell invaded your senses making you feel alive again. Those lips moulded with yours felt like heaven. Tears made their way out of your eyes again. Lips starting to move against his. Hands going into his hair tugging at it as he devoured you. You didn't realize he was crying too until you opened your eyes. His eyes blood shot, cheeks tear stained. You hated you were the reason for his disheveled state. You hated yourself.

You broke the kiss. Not being able to look him in the eyes. Trying to catch your breath.

After a few minutes of total silence you figured this was goodbye. You started moving towards your suitcase.

As he saw what you were doing he let out a loud groan. He wanted to knock some sense into you and he decided he will.

He held your arm pulling you towards himself, asking with a hoarse voice "Where do you think you are going? "

"I'm sorry, Shawn. I just....you deserve better. I'll leave, I wanted to ask you if I can take this one hoodie? If you want it back I understand. I just didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't mean anything I said earlier. It just I was a little drunk you know it's I'm so terribly sorry. " You rambled didn't realising when you started sobbing.

You felt his arms wrap around you. Engulfing you in a loving hug. You broke down. He was still being so considerate when all you did was break his heart.

"Shush honey. Y/N, I am right here. You're not going anywhere."

"I am sorry. So sorry. I-.. I'll leave. "

"Baby, I said you are not going anywhere. I need you hun. You remember, it's forever." He said in his beautiful voice showing you his promise ring. The one you got him three months back. Just before he left.

You looked up at him through your crys. You wanted to see if he hated you or not. He could lie to you but his eyes could never. To your surprise all you saw was worry and love. A sense of relief washed over you. You released a breath you didn't know you were holding all this while.

"I love you baby. We are okay. I'm sorry I shouldn't have left like this."

"No no no Shawn. You.. I.... I'm so fucking terrible. I didn't mean anything earlier. I just wanted to I don't know I'm a fool. I was so scared I lost you forever. I'm so sorry. I love you so much. "

"No bub, I get where you're coming from. I understand. Just seeing you go to his birthday party made my blood boil. Seeing me with Camila, making out, holding hands I get it. I'm sorry. You should have told me, Y/N. I always wanted you to be comfortable with it. Although I shouldn't have put you in that spot when I know you won't ever say anything that's not in favour of my career. "

" I just didn't wanna hold you back, Shawn. I knew it was important but seeing you with her I just can't help but compare myself to her. I'm so pathetic. I hate myself. "

" Hey don't you ever say that about my baby. She's the best. Okay? Most beautiful, most caring, loving, selfless and she has the best legs. Her ass is so sexy. Her curves. Those lips I never wanna let go off. " He said his hands on your ass massaging it. You let out a low moan. It had been so long.

You wanted Shawn more than anything . His head dipped down to your neck, your head falling back. It felt unreal to be this close to him again. Especially after that sick stunt you pulled off.

He bit you at your soft spot and you jumped in his arms making him chuckle. He licked it to soothe it and you moaned. Not being able to control how overwhelmed you were after months of no physical contact with him.

"By the way that dress, baby. Not a smart move wearing it to Tom's birthday party, was it? " He said as his hands creeped up inside your hoodie sending shivers up your spine.

You just moaned in response only to receive a light tug at your bum.

"Words, honey. Use your words with me. " He said in that deep voice making your knees turn into jelly.

"Yes daddy. It was so stupid of me. Sorry daddy. " You said in your most innocent voice. Eyes looking glossy.

Shawn literally lost it there. Letting out a low growl. " Fuck Y/N." He turned you around. Making you face the mirror on your vanity. Your ass pressed onto his front. You could feel him already getting hard against your thigh. "Say it again." He commanded in a low voice. So you did feeling yourself getting wet. The pool in your panties becoming larger. "Mmm Daddy." You moaned as he moved your hair onto one side tilting your head so that he could assault your neck again. He knew how much you loved it when he did this.

"You know I wanted to take you right when you entered the house. Looking so pretty in that dress. Daddy got so worked up, baby. Only if you weren't being an annoying little brat." He said bringing his hand on your left boob cupping it under your hoodie.

"No bra? You're being very naughty I see."

"Sorrrryyy daddy. Sorry for being a little brat. I need you, daddy." You couldn't take his assault anymore. You whined. You just wanted him to fuck you into oblivion. Wanted him to be rough with you. Wanted to be close to him. As close that even air couldn't get in between the two of you.

"My hun is eager, I see. What do you want honey?" He asked.

"Want daddy to fuck me. Hard." You answered. Your eyes closed as he played with your tits. You could already feel yourself dripping on your thigh.

"Fuck baby. Getting daddy so hard huh? But do you deserve it after what you did."

"No daddy I have been bad. Very bad." You said. Extremely excited for what was in store for you. Shawn being a little rough and dominant always got you in the mood no matter when and where. That was his effect. The fact that only you got to see this side of the otherwise always a sweetheart gentle giant Shawn worked wonders on you. You loved it and he knew that.

"Hmm so kitten what is your punishment then?" Shawn whispered in your left ear. Making goosebumps arise on your body.

"Spanks, daddy. I have to count."

"Mm look at you being so good. How many do you deserve baby? "

"6 daddy? "

"Isn't that very less for what you did hun? Make it 10."

"Okay daddy."

He tugged at your hands as an indication for you to raise them so that he could take off his large hoodie of you. Leaving you only in your black lace panties. Looking at your almost naked body, Shawn couldn't help the moan that escaped his lips. Hands immediately cupping both your boobs. "So beautiful kitten."

"Thank you, daddy."

He proceeded on to take off his shirt. His biceps flexing in the process making your mouth water. You still were in a haze. This man, literally Adonis was yours? How'd you get so lucky? His flawless skin. The little hair peppering his chest. The defined pecs. His abs. You didn't even realise you were gawking at him. Literally with your mouth open. A chuckle brought you back to reality. Getting flushed instantly.

"Mmm definitely enjoying what you see hun. Come here." He said sitting at the edge of the bed opening his legs so that you could bend over his thighs. You did as told.

"Want these off baby. " He tugged at your panties. Before you could even move to get them off. He ripped them apart in half as if it was nothing. You got wetter if that was possible.

"Now bend." He said. You did as told. You bent over his lap.

"Count baby." He growled as his hand slapped your right ass cheek. A loud moan leaving your lips. "One."

Another spank at the same place. Making it become an angry red. "Two." You whined.

Shawn saw your wetness dripping down your thighs forcing a strangled moan out of him. His fingers immediately going to your freshly shaved pussy lips. "You are enjoying this so much kitten? " He asked as his fingers dipped in your folds, you almost screaming at the sudden action, then he took them in his mouth. You sublimated right that moment. If this wasn't the hottest thing you'd ever seen you didn't know what was. You felt pure bliss.

Still in that euphoria you didn't realize how time passed and his hand came in contact with your ass again. Harder than before.

"Three." You cried. Your ass blood red. Tears threatening to fall out of your eyes any second. Just for a second Shawn's demeanor faltered. He seemed to be having second thoughts. He couldn't hurt you. His hand soothingly titillating the area.

You, as if, read his thoughts and told him to continue. "It hurts so good, daddy." That was all he needed. "You're doing so good kitten. Just two more." With that his hand came down again not so hard this time. You moaned, loving the burning sensation.

He repeated the same with your left cheek. You started to cry by the time he was done. He took you in his arms. Making you face him. Straddling his lap. "Did so good for me baby." You rested your head on his shoulder. Your bare pussy against the rough fabric of his jeans. His thick thighs clenching. And you started to grind your self on his thigh. You didn't even realise when. The pleasure seeming to only increase with each thrust of your hips. You let out a moan at the same time as Shawn, it's what made reality dawn upon you. Your actions halted thinking he'd want to punish you, maybe.

When you looked into his eyes, they were darker than before, almost black, filled with insatiable hunger. A wave of confidence hit you. Your movements resumed. Your pace a little faster now. Your hands made way around his neck, wrapping them for support as he held you by your waist. His eyes boring into yours, you felt yourself melt. "I want you to get off my thigh, Y/N. Don't stop until you cum." He said in a voice that was enough to do it for you. He sounded so fucking sexy you couldn't even make sense of it. "Okay daddy." With that you increased your pace. His toned muscles flexing with your movements. It felt like heaven. You felt the fire burn in you. That familiar pit. Shawn kept on cooing filthy things in your ear sending you over the edge even faster. You held onto him for dear life as you came, nails digging in his skin. This was different. The way he responded to your actions. It felt unreal. It was beyond amazing.

"Felt so good daddy." You said as you went to kiss him. He captured your lips with his, kissing you with burning passion. You poured all your apologies, how ashamed you were of your unreasonable behavior, your unconditional love for him, all in that kiss. It conveying more than you could vocally have.

"Look at you hun, ruined daddy's pants huh? Looked like a goddess getting off of my thigh. You like it?"

"Loved it daddy. I love 'em."

He wrapped your legs around his waist as if you weighed nothing, standing up. He threw you on the bed. Taking his pants off along with his boxers. His thick member sprang out of the confines hitting his abdomen making the most unholy noise. You almost gasped at how terribly hard he was. It must be painful.

You scooted closer to him on the bed, reaching the edge. "Can I taste you, daddy? "

"Fuck. Go ahead baby."

"Mmm okay." You said as you reached for him. Getting in between his thighs. Making him sit on the bed and getting on your knees on the floor. You wanted to make him feel just as good as you felt. And boy were you determined.

You took his length in your hands. Spreading the precum all over it and your lips pulling out a pornographic moan off him. He stared at you in awe. Looking so pretty with his cock in your hands, on your knees for him. So wet, your juices dripping everywhere. It was nasty and he loved it.

You took his balls in your mouth, caressing his cock, all the prominent veins and the angry red tip making you salivate. You started running your hands up and down him. Sucking his balls. "Fuck honey, so good. Go on." He caressed your hair. "Always so good for me." You released his balls from your mouth with a pop sound and licked his underside from the base to the tip, feeling each vein. You took his tip in your mouth making him almost stop breathing. "Such a good girl, Y/N. Doing amazing." He moaned. It felt like music to your ears. You finally took him all in. He let out a loud whine. The warmth of your mouth making him dizzy. You started moving your head faster, almost releasing him fully then taking as much of him as you could until he hit the back of your throat. You loved giving Shawn a head. Hell you loved doing everything to him. Anything you did for him, with him was automatically your favorite. You felt what a dumbass you were to even think of leaving him. He's the best thing that has happened to you ever. He's your present and your future. You can't let yourself ruin that. Shawn abruptly stopped you. Pulling himself out of your mouth. You gave him a confused look. "What's wrong, Shawn?" "Not gonna last long, baby. Wanna feel you. Be inside you. Come here." He scooped you in his arms. Made you lay on the bed facing the vanity mirror. He came up beside you. His large body engulfing you as he spooned you. You reached down taking him in your hands, not being able to take anymore teasing. You needed him in you. Wanted to feel full again. It almost felt like the first time today. Your emotions all over the place, being so raw. You loved every microsecond of it. You lined him with yourself, almost about to take him in when Shawn took control. "Calm down. You know Y/N, good girls don't behave like this." "Sorry." You mumbled grumpily. His hand wrapped around your throat. Pressing lightly. Fuck, you got wetter if that was humanely even possible. You felt you might cum right then. "Sorry, what honey? Be good." "Sorry Daddy." "Mmm better." He said as he rubbed his tip at your slit. Teasing you like always. "So wet for me, honey. You've ruined all the sheets." You just moaned loudly in response incapable of forming a coherent sentence. He slowly pushed inside you. He was so fucking big. It hurt. He stretched you out so well. Relief washing you over. Feeling him in you made you feel complete. He stilled once he was inside letting you adjust. "Move baby? " He asked. "Mmm fuck. Yes daddy." You said.

His hand moved from your throat to your clit, rubbing you as he fucked you hard from behind. Your eyes started to close which as soon as he noticed he stopped. You whined so loudly at this it was almost shocking for you. "Open your eyes, baby if you want me to continue. Watch us in the mirror. Watch how daddy fucks you so good." And you saw the most obscene sight. His one hand rubbing your clit. You could see his cock move in and out of you. Other hand on your left boob pressing it hard. You couldn't help but whimper at the beautiful view. So dirty. You loved it.

His pace got faster as he dipped his neck into the crook of your neck leaving hickeys. Your hand reaching back holding onto his arm. Your nails scratching him, digging into his skin.

The feeling of bliss took over you as you yelled "I'm going to cum, Shawn." "Come for me, honey. I'm gonna cum too." His pace faltered becoming slower. He was close too. He rubbed your little nub faster, the nerves started burning at his assault.

"Aaah fuck fuck fuck daddy." With that you came all over him, him following you almost instantly. He let out a grunt as he came inside you, filling you up. Riding you both to the end of your orgasms.

He stayed like that for a few minutes. Not moving at all. Then he pulled out of you. Getting up to go to the bathroom like he always did. He came back with a wet towel, cleaning you up so gently. Then he cleaned himself up with the same towel. And you don't know but this always felt so intimate to you. More than all that you guys just did. Him cleaning you both up with the same towel made your heart flutter. You were so fallen for him you didn't know yourself.

He came back after dumping the towel with the dirty laundry.

As soon as he came to bed, you snuggled into his chest. He was your home. You felt so safe. No one could hurt you with him there. Not even you, yourself. He'd protect you.

A single tear slipped from your eye as you both lay in comfortable silence cuddled with each other. As he noticed it, in the sweetest voice ever he said "It's okay baby. You don't have to even think about what happened earlier, again. I knew it'd affect you badly and I still went for it. I knew if I asked you, you'd never say no. So it was me taking you for granted, hun. You're not at fault. It was me, baby. I put you in that spot."

"Oh shut up, Mendes. Always making me seem so good. It was my and only my fault. Don't you dare blame it on yourself. And I'm so so sorry. I won't ever doubt what we have. It's the most real thing I have felt in my whole 22 years of existence. I love you so much, words can't even express it."

"But you do in other ways. You know." He smirked making you roll your eyes, nudging him lightly in his chest.

"You riding my thigh was the most fucking hot view ever. Trust me, I almost came."

"Oh shut it and let me sleep." You said all flustered about what you did.

"One last thing, baby. "

"Hmm? "

"You're the only one I want. "

You cuddled more into him finally being able to fall asleep soundly in your home.

Taglist: @monikamendes @holland-styles @bvttercupbby @lonelyreputation @badreputationlove @shawn-youth @itsalwaysbeen305 @perfectlywrongsm @particularnarry @wholesomemendes @myboyshawn @myboyshawnie @imaginashawnns @camilalewiss @swiftmendeshoran @princecharmingmendes @fallinallincurls @glitterypositivityforaesthetic @shawnpetermuffins @stylesharrys @shawnblanc @shawn-mendes-thirst @shawnftchris @lonelyreputation

Tell me guys if anyone wants to be added or removed from the taglist.

Also this is my first time writing on tumblr so i dont know if I did any stupidities please let me know if I did 🥺🥺

And How'd you guys like the shot? I'd really appreciate if you all leave feedbacks. Thank you lovelies! ❣

#shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes angst #Shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes smut #benito-mi-vida #shawn mendes #Shawn Mendes× reader #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn×yn #shawn and camila #only want you

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hobbitsnapes · 3 years

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YOU GUYS ARE DATING

Corpse x MGK!sister reader

(Found this image on Pinterest so all credit goes to artist, if you know who it is please comment below so I can credit them)

A/N: this was requested by @heyitssab

Tree is tall of sex in this, but it’s more in a joking matter, plus corpse has stated he doesn’t mind as long as you are not a minor or send or tag him. I’m literally 2 years younger than him, and have no intentions of ever tagging him or sending him any of my work XD

Summary: how many idiots does it take to tell the brother and friend they’re dating? Apparently takes 2 very forgetful people, who kept their relationship secret without knowing it.

It had just been by chance, a small chance that he had been scrolling through his tags. liking and reposting art, when he saw a tag from someone he followed. He wrecked his brain for when he had followed her, coming up empty. She was cute, no denying the beauty she had as she laughed in the video. It was a clip from a stream that he didn’t know she had, as he couldn’t even remember her name, wearing his merch as it fit her snug. It fit her perfectly in fact, the large hood covering her face, hiding the flush to her face from her rather large chuckles that left her body. He couldn’t help but like the photo, and he couldn’t help but to press message either.

It was first only small likes to posts, an Occasional message, and a view on their livestreams, but that all changed when he spoke of the song he was working on with her older brother.

It all started that night, when both lay in their beds as they talked, laughed, and felt their hearts flutter each time they heard one another speak.

Her phone rang violently in her bag, nearly making her drop the to go bag all over the ground as she walked. “Hello?” She asked, as she held both bags with her hands as her shoulder gripped the phone as if it’d fall down a cliff. “Hey bug!” He exclaimed, making her chuckle as she heard the booming sound of his voice. She had always detested the nickname, as he gave it to her as kids due to her horrendous fear of the creatures. But, it brought more joy to her, as it reminded her of their youth. Having been adults for years, it was fun to hear such a childish name that’s stuck.

“Hey mopey.” She chuckled, as that was the name she gave him when he was in his emo phase that he never outgrew.

Both talked as she walked towards the elevator, mainly about how his day had gone as she silently listened.

She had always been this way, always the shyer of the two, the one to listen to others first before she said a word. He had teased her for it most of their childhood and teen life, but he had grown to love it, as he could let loose or rant to her about anything, and he knew she’d be there just to listen to him.

“So what’re you doing right now?” He asked, as she got into the elevator. “Just grabbed some dinner a few minutes before you called and nearly made me shit.” A smile painted on her face at his boisterous laughter.

“Are you at home?” He asked, as he heard the sound of the elevator beeping in the background. “No, I’m spending the night with my boyfriend.”

She had mentioned about a month prior that she was seeing someone, the joy it brought him to hear the excitement and joy in her tone as she gushed about their first date.

If this was 7 or 8 years prior, he would be bombarding her with questions about the man, who he was, where he lived, where he could meet him to find his intentions with his baby sister. But, in the last few years, he found himself feeling calmer whenever she’d mentioned her love life. He knew she was smart, and would never date a man who treated her poorly. The few breakups she had, they always ended amicably, her head still high as she told him. So, he never asked her any questions about the man, as he could tell from the few times she mentioned him, he could feel the love this man had for her, and Vice versa.

The strong barreling of her phone alerted them awake, both groaning out as she reached for her phone without lifting her head from his shoulder. “Hello?” She mumbled, voice slurred as the saliva was thick in her mouth, barely awake as she fought to listen in on who dares to wake them up.

“Hey!” He exclaimed, making her equally exhausted lover groan. She shifted off of him, laying on her back as he turned away from her, as to hopefully shut his eyes and fall back asleep. She was used to her brother's large voice, as it hardly phased her after growing up with him. “Colson, why are you calling me this ungodly hour?” “Oh come on, it’s not that early.” “Col its-“ She pulled her phone from her ear, eyes shutting violently as the bright light blinded her “5 o’clock in the morning. So again, I’m going to ask you, why did you call me at the asscrack of dawn?” “You don’t remember?” He asked, making her irritation grow. “No, that’s why I’m asking.” She says, as she rubbed her sleep crusted eyes. “You were coming up today to hang out with casie, remember?” Her hand stopped rubbing her face, as she felt her heart stop momentarily. “Wait, you mean today? I thought I was coming Friday?” “No, both of you settled on today, remember I told you that’s perfect because I have a day off?” She felt her heart pain as she heard the sadness in his tone, knowing he’s expecting her to bail. “Yeah sorry, I thought you meant Friday so I mixed it up, let me get ready and I’ll be out the door okay? Love you” she said, as she hung up the line.

Before she could even move, she felt his arm wrap around her body. A tired groan leaving his lips. “Nooo stayyyy.” He groaned, pulling her body to his. She smiled as she looked down at him, wrapping her arm on his chest and the other behind his neck. “I wish I could live, but I can’t.” Planting a soft kiss against his lips. “Stay in bed for a few more hours, please?” Her heart pulled at his tone, hearing just how tired he was. “I can’t, casies wanted me to come up for weeks now. And it takes a good 3 hours to get there. I wanna spend as much time as I can with them before it gets dark so I can get back safely.” He groaned at this, wrapping his arms around her. “Yeah but it’s only 5, it wouldn’t be safe to drive since we went to bed like, 2 hours ago.” “Yeah, and whos fault was that mister?” She teased, “hmm, sorry but I just couldn’t keep my hands to myself after not seeing you for a few days.” He mused, pulling her body closer to his, planting his lips against hers. A small hum left her lips as he pulled her thigh over his, grabbing the flesh harshly as their lips cascaded together. “Mm, no no no, you’re not gonna convince me to stay here just to go another round.” She said, as she got off from his warm body, throwing his large hoodie over her bare body. “Oh come on babe, are you sure about that?” He said, making her turn around to him. A small gasp left her lips as her eyes took in his milky white complexion. His honey brown eyes looking back at her with a small smile etched onto his face. His hair a tousled mess that resembled a bird's nest, some pieces falling onto his face. “Honey, I’ve been wanting to see my family for weeks now, I see you almost everyday and practically live here. I’ll be back tomorrow so I can grab more clothes from my place okay?” She placed a kiss to his lips, both holding one another in their arms. “I don’t know why you don’t just say fuck that place and just move in.” He mumbled, making her chuckle and heart warm. “Don't you think it’s a little soon though? I mean we’ve only been together a few months love.” “Yeah, but you’ve practically lived here since we got together, you literally just go there to get more clothes that you end up leaving here.” She looked into his eyes as she thought about his words. “Hm, I’ll think about it today okay?” She mused, planting a kiss to his lips. A soft okay leaving him as she got up.

“And babe, remember if you live here, we can have all the sex we want and not have to worry about driving to get one another.” He exclaimed, laughing at the loud honey she screamed from the bathroom.

She couldn’t help but laugh out as she watched, as her niece tried her hardest to braid her fathers grown out hair. It was near impossible not to, as pieces would fall out, resulting in her pulling them harsher, nearly pulling his eyelids back due to the tension from his temples. “Okay okay you’re gonna fuckin scalp me.” He chuckled , as all three bursted out in large laughter.

“So how’s school going this year?” She asked her, as she delicately painted her nails. Both of the girls had found themselves on the floor in front of the nice coffee table, as colson sat and chatted with them. “It’s going really well.” “Oh yeah? Make any new friends?” She teased. “I mean, kinda.” She couldn’t help but hear the wavering in her tone, spotting the faint blush dusting her skin. “Ohh, so there’s a someone eh?” She teased to her, making the preteen hide her face as to conceal the flush. “His names Garrett, and we both take social studies together. He always sits next to me at lunch, and we’ll draw on my notebook.” She gushed, making her smile. “Soo, do you think he likes you?” “I mean, that’s what everyone keeps saying.” “Yeah well don’t worry about it to much cas, you’re not dating anyone for many more years. You’re still a kid.” Her das said, making the young girls face fall.

Y/N knew he was only saying this to protect her, as he said the same thing to her growing up. “Hey, don’t be bummed out about it. He is right, you both are only 12 and should focus on school. But don’t worry, he’ll come around. He was just like that with me up until my current boyfriend.” She whispered, making the young girl chuckle.

“Speaking of which, how are you guys doing?” He asked, as she hadn’t mentioned hun to her in a while. He didn’t think it’d hurt to ask. “Great actually, we’re thinking of moving in together actually.” “That’s great! I’m really happy that y’all met.” “Yeah, I am too.” She hummed, a flush dusting her cheeks.

Both men laughed as they chatted on the phone, talking about anything that would come to mind. What was once only a collaboration for a song, turned into an amazing friendship that caused both of them to call at late hours just to shoot the shit.

A yawn left his lips, as he listened to colson ramble on about another song he was making. “Woah, you tired man?” Colson asked, shocked to hear the sound. “Yeah sorry, was up most of the night last night.” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. “Were you feeling alright?” He asked, worry laced in his tone. He knew all about his friends illnesses, even once being on the other end of the phone during a bad spell one day.” “Oh yeah yeah yeah, was just, up with the misses last night.” He chuckled, a flush blooming on his cheeks. “Ohhh yeah? And how was it?” This shocked him, nearly feeling his heart stop. Like, does he usually know about his sisters sex life? He didn’t think much of it, as he knew just how close both were. “It was absolutely fucking amazing. Like I thought we’d be done for the night, fully tapped out but after like 5 minutes she’d be right back on me for another round.” He chuckled, his flush even worse than before. “Ayyyeee good for you corpse, glad to hear that puss is bussin.” He laughed at this, throwing his head back. “Yeah, it’s bussin bussin.”

Both men talk as they read from their phones, eyes wide in absolute awe of the love they received from the song. They had just dropped it a few days prior, not expecting the cry of joy from both fan bases.

He didn’t even look up from it when she walked in, until she bent down to plant a kiss to his forehead. “Sorry I had completely forgot about the tea I made you an hour ago, but I put it back on the stove to heat it up so if it’s twisting funky just tell me okay?” Before he could even thank her, both their heads whipped towards the loudness from the other line. “Y/N? Is that you? What in the hell are you doing there with corpse!” He didn’t sound angry, more shocked than anything, both of them looking at the phone in confusion. “I, I love here? Remember I told you like a month ago I was moving in with him?” “WHAT!” Both jumped at the loud scream. “Wait so you guys are dating!?” Both we’re even more perplexed, until it dawned on both of them. Their eyes wide as they turned their heads to one another slowly. “Wait you didn’t tell him?” “No? He’s one of your best friends so I thought you did!” “He’s your brother! So I thought you did!” Both whisper, until all three lay silent. That was until, the large cry of laughter that leaves the two, leaving colson even more confused. He wasn’t mad, not at all actually. More shocked and confused than anything. Until he started thinking, it does make sense, all the times they spoke about one another without him knowing, all the times they mentioned-“OH GOD!” He yelled, gagging violently, making them stop their laughing fit. “What's wrong? Why are you yelling?” She asks “like a month ago corpse was talking about how he was tired cause he was up all night having sex AND I HAD NO IDEA HE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU! OH GOD WAS THAT WHY YOU WERE LIMPING THAT DAY WITH CAS AND I!” Both laugh even harder, as they listen to his ever growing gags.

“So yeah,. That’s literally how we had no idea we were keeping the relationship secret from her brother.” He laughed, as he red the comments and listened to his friends' laughter. She sat beside him, head laying on his shoulder as he told the story. She couldn’t help but to look back up into his eyes, as he glanced down at her, planting a soft kiss to her lips. “Keep it pg guys.” Colson said from the other line, making them chuckle.

#corpse husband imagine #corpse #corpse husband fanfic #corpse x reader #corpse imagine #corpse fic #corpse x you #corpse husband x reader #corpse husband

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timextoxhajima · 3 years

Note

hi dana.. if it’s possible can i request some angsty wangsty based on niki la la lost you with eric🥺 and ughh i really love your writing like crazyyyyy

♥ title: la la lost you in april [also part of @sunlightwoo ‘s 12 Months I Loved You collaboration project]

♥ member: tbz eric

♥ genre: f2l, ex! eric x fem! reader, model! eric [SFW!]

♥ warnings: swearing, some mentions of sex [like, once i think]

♥ wc: 3.4k

♥ a/n: sis when i first heard the song I absolutely loved how you used 'angsty wangsty' so I hope this one does it for you the way you imagined it <3 [fyi i wrote it in like, a camcorder recording audio format which is something i’m trying out so please hmu on whether it’s difficult to read/understand!]

[REC: APRIL 2, 2019 - 6:39PM] SOLO LOG #1

Are you seeing this? This is the most beautiful sunset I’ve seen. I gotta get a shot of this-

Hey! Hey! I could help you take a picture with the sunset if you want to!

Oh! Would- Would you? That’d be great!

Of course!

...

Here. Is it alright?

Yeah, yeah, it’s cool! Thank you so much!

Are you recording something? Is it a- Are you vlogging? Are you a vlogger?

Yeah, no... I’m actually on a solo trip for a bit.

Oh, where are you from?

Just the next state.

Ah! You’re taking a break off... life then? I assume? Sorry if that came out weird.

No! No no! It’s alright! Yeah, I just needed a short break from... y’know, school and everything. My semester ended pretty early on so I took the chance to come out here and... see some new sights, meet some new people.

I get that. Well, for a start, what’s your name?

Oh, I’m y/n. Nice to meet you! And you?

I’m Eric.

[REC: APRIL 4, 2019 - 10:34PM] SOLO LOG #2

It is the 4th of April, 2019. I know, I know, I’m meant to do a daily vlog for all the 50 days I’m here but... it’s been... wow. Um... so I met Eric, the first day I touched down. The beach is just, about a 10 minute walk down and the sunsets are absolutely gorgeous. But uh... call me a fool and say that I’m living in the clouds but- what are the chances?

He’s funny, he’s such a great person to be around with y’know? Never a moment of like, awkwardness or stress and my God, look at me talking about a boy like that, though I met him 2 days ago.

...

Um, he’s a freelance model. For those freelance shoots by UNIQLO or Target or something and he complains about the pay sometimes, but he looks good infront of a camera, so he’s... actually the one who won at life, really.

I’m not seeing him soon because he’s got a shoot out of town and he’ll be back next week. But I did get his number and he’s been texting me since.

...

Wouldn’t it be funny if we end up together and then I have this whackass of a reel to show him? Jesus... I need to stop getting ahead of myself here. Freakin’ living in the clouds, aren’t I?

...

Anyway, I’m gonna go and see if I can get my weird projector shit up and working. See you.

[REC: APRIL 7, 2019 - 5:14AM] SOLO LOG #3

It is... 5am... uh, April 7th- and I was just binging FRIENDS through the night, waiting for the sunrise before I get some shut eye and then... Eric just asked me out. Oh my God! Um, he’s coming back this Thursday and I’ll go see him at the airport before we go get dinner.

It was really funny ‘cause he had to wake up early for a shoot today and so his day has just begun but mine’s coming to an end and I just- I’m rambling so much, it’s kinda- it’s kinda sad, isn’t it?

I think I’m too happy to sleep right now so I’m just gonna text him some more before the sun rises- oh! He replied!

...

Anyway, I’m gonna go and finish up this last episode before sleeping. Hopeful I can sleep. Bye!

[REC: APRIL 11, 2019 - 4:28PM] SOLO LOG #4

I am on my way out right now to go meet Eric at the airport, and I’m... it’d be an understatement to say that I’m excited. I know I’ve only known him for like, 2 days before he left but... I miss him. Is that possible? Missing someone despite knowing them for 2 days?

Anyway, I gotta go. Don’t wanna be late to see him.

[REC: APRIL 13, 2019 - 10:23AM] SOLO LOG #5

Oh! Is that what you had-

Yeah! It’s the same camera!

What are you vlogging for, actually? Like-

Nothing, really. It’s just for my own usage-

Wait, you didn’t like set that up last night while we-

Oh, God, no! Who do you think I am?

I don’t know, I mean, we’ve known each other for... is it two weeks-

Just under two weeks-

Jeez-

I know, I know, oh my God.

...

I don’t regret it though. Yeah, like- I don’t really go down to the beach that often in the first place and it just- it just so happened that you were there that day and I saw you struggling with this old thing-

I was not struggling!

Yeah you were!

I wasn’t-

I’m kidding! Gosh, you’re so cute.

...

Are you gonna have the camera recording while this carries on?

I forgot it was on-

One day we’re gonna accidentally make a sex tape-

Eric!

[REC: APRIL 17, 2019 - 1:15AM] SOLO LOG #6

-ould you pass me the hot water?

Mm? What?

The kettle over on the counter. Careful, it’s hot. Yeah, thanks.

Do you need help with-

It’s just instant noodles, sweet. Doubt I need a diploma for this. You’re recording again?

Yeah, does it bother you?

No, no, ‘course not. Though that means I can’t really do whatever I want to now.

What does that mea-

...

I can... still taste that bit of milk tea you had just now-

Could you tell it’s zero sugar?

I don’t think that matters, it’s still sweet and not great for your health to have that so much.

Aw, and yet you’re the one who suggested noodles at this timing, yeah?

You were hungry too!

...

Here, it’s done. Help me get the bowls?

Did you even wash these?

Yeah, I did. If you don’t trust me, you can run them under the water for a bit.

Mhm. Here.

If it’s not enough, we can call for Macs.

Y’know, I’ve never had Macs past midnight back at home.

What? Really? Well, when you get back in May, would you try?

Yeah, why not? Maybe I’ll do that when I’m back in school.

...

What date is it today?

April... hold on, um, 17. Careful, that’s hot.

...

When are you leaving again?

May 22.

Are you planning on coming back anytime soon after?

I don’t know. I have school to worry about and the only other time I can come back’s probably during winter break in November.

...

I won’t be around in November.

Mm? Why not?

I’m moving.

To where?

I’m not sure yet, but I need to move depending on whether I get it and where the shoot’s at.

Shoot? It’s a big project, huh?

Yeah, it’s- it’s a pretty big deal.

...

I’ll- Let me just go and...

[REC: APRIL 20, 2019 - 7:49PM] SOLO LOG #7

-idn’t have to!

No, c’mon! It’s such a great time to get this on camera! Come on, tell us what just happened!

Well, I just scored a huge model contract with Calvin Klein - in Manhattan.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I’m so fucking proud of you, oh my God! Can you believe it-

No, fuck off, I can’t either!

Oh! Calvin Klein!

...

I swear, you’re an angel sent to me-

Fuck off!

I’m serious! it’s so timely- I just can’t- I’m just so happy to have met you.

...

Well, you heard it first here, ladies and gentlemen. Eric Sohn is a new model for Calvin Klein - Manhattan.

[REC: APRIL 21, 2019 - 12:40PM] SOLO LOG #8

It is 12.40pm... April 21st, 2019. I’m finally back in my apartment after crashing at Eric’s for the last... 10 days? I think it was 10 days. My clothes were running out and I didn’t want to hike up his water bills so I just came back and- y’know did my own laundry.

...

Well, it’s- it’s been an absolute dream. The last thing I expected to... have, or meet? Here, is Eric. Um, but I know I’m probably going to regret this. Especially when May 22 comes. Uh... this is... it’s real bad. I mean, we’re great, y’know? But... it’s bad, because I know it’ll hurt. Like a bitch. When my time here is up, and I gotta go back to my reality, and Eric’s gotta stick to his.

We haven’t really talked about it. May. I don’t think he wants to, and I don’t think I want to either. 50 days is too short. Either that, or I shouldn’t have come here in the first place. I shouldn’t have gone to the beach that day, in that hour.

...

I just wish we had more time. I wish 24 hours were... maybe about 100 seconds more per minute. Does that make sense? 160 seconds per minute. Then again, I don’t think that’d solve my problem. I’ll still be on a ticking... time bomb.

...

I know I shouldn’t say this. I know I can’t. I know I can’t afford to. But... I... I love him. I love Eric. With every... bit of me. It’s so... disgustingly cliché, but I feel so... comfortable with him. There’s really nothing we’d fight about, and even if we disagreed on something, we’d play it off like a debate, then forget about it the next day.

...

I love him. I do. And I’m going to regret this later. Without a doubt.

...

[REC: APRIL 27, 2019 - 2:02AM] SOLO LOG #9

-ou can see the stars?

I don’t know, that’s why I’m trying, sweet.

...

Can you see them?

Yeah, maybe if I just turn this ISO- Oh! I can kinda see the North Star-

Oh! Yeah, you can! It’s really feint though.

Right.

It’s okay, we can just lay it down here-

On the grass? Will your camera be fine?

Yeah, yeah, or else you can just put in on top of my bag- here.

...

Here, can you see me? Am I in frame?

Yeah, you’re in frame.

Okay, great. Now get over here!

...

I can taste the smoothie you had just now.

Too sweet?

A little.

...

Oh my God! Put me down! Oh- not there! It’s ticklish- AHHHHH!

...

y/n, I have something to tell you.

Mm? What is it?

...

Hello? Earth to Eric?

I... I love you. So much... and I can’t bear to see you go in May.

Oh, Eric...

No, I- I don’t want you to stay- or even think about it, ‘cause, you have your priorities and I have mine y’know...

Mhm.

I just... I just wished we had more time.

I do too. I really do.

...

Eric?

Hm?

I love you too.

...

[REC: MAY 1, 2019 - 4:23AM] SOLO LOG #10

1st May. 4...30? Am? I believe. Um, Eric’s sound asleep in his bed and I couldn’t sleep so I decided to do a log.

...

I have... 3 weeks left. 4 weeks have gone past just like that, and I don’t know what to think about it. I came for a 50-day retreat. No stress, just myself and peace and quiet and tranquility and yet-

...

I- I don’t know if I can do this.

...

[REC: MAY 7, 2019 - 3:58PM] SOLO LOG #11

So, Eric’s in shoot right now and I’m on the way into the studio with some donuts and coffee to surprise him. I called his manager and asked if it was okay so- I’m pretty psyched to see his workspace.

...

Hi, I’m y/n, I’m here to visit Eric?

Ah, okay! Hold on, let me just get you signed in with the pass-

Count me in!

You sure? This Saturday at the prep-party?

Yeah- Oh!

Eric!

y/n! What are you doing here?

I wanted to surprise you. Am I... interrupting anything?

Oh, not at all!

You must be y/n! Eric’s told me so much about you!

Did he? And you are...?

I’m Chelsea! I’ve been attached to the same Calvin Klein contract he recently got, so you could say we’re colleagues!

Well, nice to meet you! Oh, right, these donuts and coffee are meant for you guys actually!

Oh! You’re too kind! Eric, you’re such a lucky man.

I know, she’s just... everything.

Anyway, thank you so much for these. I’ll bring them back down to the studio for the crew to share. But Eric’s pretty much done for the day actually, so you guys can leave if you want to!

Are you sure? Don’t you need help downstairs with the equipment?

No, no! It’s fine, there’re more than enough people downstairs. Go have your date, and maybe you can bring her along with you for the prep-party this weekend!

What’s the prep-party... preparing for?

Oh, you’re so adorable! It’s a prep-party for the end-of-May shoot we’re gonna have. it’s a collab with DAZED so it’s a pretty big project.

You never told me you were involved in a collab with DAZED.

I was gonna tell you today.

He has been pretty busy recently, maybe slipped his mind. Anyway, thank you so much for the donuts and I’ll hope to see you at the pier this Saturday, mm?

Yeah, sure. Thanks Chels.

No problem! It was so nice to meet you, y/n, I’ll see you Saturday!

Okay, bye!

Bye, Chelsea! It was nice to meet you!

Bye!

...

Sweet, why didn’t you tell me you were coming?

I wanted it to be a surprise. I thought you said you’d end pretty late?

The filming was cut short because the shots were better than expected so we ended early.

Oh, I wanted to film you while you were at work.

You have that on?

Yeah- why?

No, just wondering.

Are you uncomfortable?

No, no, it’s just... I really didn’t expect you to come to the studio.

...

[REC: MAY 11, 2019 - 11:12PM] SOLO LOG #12

It’s 11:12pm, 11th May, 2019. 11 days to departure.

...

I... saw... Chelsea and Eric... um, out by the garage-

...

Well, I guess... it looked like they were just... having a really good talk. Or something.

...

I left. I couldn’t watch it. So, I left without telling Eric. I did tell his boss that I wasn’t feeling well and I had to leave first.

...

I guess this is the part where I regret it, isn’t it? Um... I don’t know... how... I’m gonna explain this to him when I see him again. Which is supposed to be- um- the rest of the night. I was supposed to go back to his place with him and I’ll stay for the weekend before I come back to pack my things, so-

...

y/n, are you home?

...

shit.

y/n, I know you’re home. I heard you talking. Open the door, I need to talk to you.

...

[REC: MAY 12, 2019 - 2:00AM] SOLO LOG #13

...

I look like shit, don’t I? God, my eyes hurt like a bitch.

...

I don’t think I need to say what just happened for you to guess what just happened, right? This... says it all.

...

Fuck.

...

I shouldn’t have come here. How did- How did my retreat turn out- turn out like this?

...

This is- This is too much. Too much in too short... of a time.

...

I don’t think... I don’t think I can do it. Not anymore.

...

[REC: MAY 19, 2019 - 9:59AM] SOLO LOG #14

It’s May 19th, 2019, almost 10am. I just came back from a morning walk by the beach just to... reminisce a little before I leave on Wednesday.

...

I... haven’t seen Eric since the prep-party. I blocked him and I told him not to come over, though I think he has, like, a few times. I thought I heard someone come up to my door, but he never knocked.

...

So, this is how it ends, huh? A 50-day romance cut short like that. Into about, 40?

...

It’s crazy to think that I had... the experience of a whole relationship in 40 days. I definitely did not sign up for that when I booked this 50-day retreat.

...

It was fun while it lasted, though. It was. I don’t think I’d find anybody else like Eric, and I guess it just sucks that it had to end like that. Things happen, right? That aren’t... in our control.

...

[REC: MAY 21, 2019 - 8:07PM] SOLO LOG #15

May 21st. About 8pm. I leave in about 15 hours.

...

All my stuff’s packed. Definitely more things to bring home than I brought here. Half of these things were bought by Eric and given to me. I’m... actually not sure if I should bring them back.

...

I don’t- I just don’t think I’d have the heart to throw them away.

...

Nor look at them when I’m home.

...

Should I even bring this camera home? Maybe I should wipe your memory before I bring you home, hmm?

...

It feels like a dream, doesn’t it? Everything that’s happened. It feels like a fever dream. Maybe when I’m finally home, I’d wake up and it’d be the day I come here.

...

Maybe.

...

[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 10:03AM] SOLO LOG #16

-ny more luggage?

Nope.

Alright then, I think you’re all set. You still have about an hour’s time before the gates are open so you can get a cup of coffee or something, yeah?

Okay, thank you!

Have a nice flight ma’am.

Thanks.

...

Good evening ma’am, can I check your boarding pass?

Yeah, sure.

...

Okay, you’re good to go. Have a safe flight.

Thank you!

...

[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 11:34AM] SOLO LOG #17

It is about 11.30am and I’m on the flight, and here’s the view outside. Sky’s pretty clear and this thing says that the weather’s great so, it should be a smooth flight without turbulence.

...

This is it. This is really it.

...

Um-

Hi, ma’am, I’m gonna need you to keep your camcorder.

Oh! Yeah, sure, sure, sorry!

[REC: APRIL 2, 2020 - 12:48AM] ERIC LOG #1

Wow, this is... weird. How did you do this last year?

...

Um, hi. y/n. If you’re watching this then I’ve somehow managed to get this synced into your camera by some weird... bluetooth, iCloud shit that Felix helped me figure out.

...

It’s been a year. And... I just thought you should... see this, or hear me out, at least. I know we didn’t end on the best terms... and I’m sorry. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have yelled at you for being unreasonable for something that was... suspicious. I should’ve understood.

...

I should’ve been there. To see you off. And I’m sorry I didn’t. I... was scared, that I wouldn’t be able to let you go if I went to send you off. I was a coward. I still am.

...

But I do want you to know that... those 50 days were the best days of my life. Albeit it ended horribly, but nothing could... nothing- nothing will ever replace what happened last April.

...

I said I love you and... I still do. Every day I think about you and your smile and your voice and- and I cry to sleep... worrying that I’d forget how you sound like, or how you laugh and how... how you smell like. My bed smelt like you even after you left.

...

I just- I love you. And I miss you. And I’d do anything to go back to what we had. I’d do anything to get- to get you back.

...

I’m sorry.

...

the clip comes to an automatic stop. the white triangle slapped onto the screen, begging you to play it again. you look up from the screen, watching the famous calvin klein ad that hasn’t stopped playing in the last month.

he hasn’t changed one bit. not his hair, not his smile, not his voice.

it’s a bittersweet pot of memory stashed in the back of your head when the memories flood back. looking back down at the camera, you count back the days - it was synced just last night.

the pile of tissues by your thighs are carelessly huddled into the bin next to your feet, mentally berating yourself for going through the memory instead of formatting it.

you stand, fingers shutting the screen back onto its body with a soft click. the tv blacks out when you press the red button on its remote.

you’re halfway into your kitchen when there’s a knock at your door, and you immediately gasp, blinking rapidly.

“oh, it’s my fucking projector!”

rushing to the door, you don’t hesitate to get the door open.

and yet, like the heavens were providing you with all the light to stop you from doubting yourself, your lungs empty themselves like vacuums.

your heart stops.

your breathing stops.

“eric... what are you doing here?”

222 notes · View notes

ynderebot · 3 years

Text

OFFICIAL POST

危険...DANGER.

LOADING…ADDING NEW FILES... █▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ 10% ███▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ 30% █████▒▒▒▒▒ 50% ███████▒▒▒ 100% ██████████

COMPLETE.

ファイル...FILES.

choi yeonjun. nancy mcdonie. lee gahyeon. kim sunwoo. kim doyeon. choi san. kim sihyeon. yang jeongin.

執着型 [ shuuchaku-gata ] obsessive.

"where were you? who were you with? what were you doing? why didn't you answer my messages? oh come on darling, don't be like that...I've been waiting for hours!"

[ PROFILE 1. ]

choi yeonjun.

5'11. 21 yrs old. September 13th, 1999. virgo. blood type a. born in seoul, south korea

at age 14 yeonjun was sent to a boarding school in japan, this is where he discovered his...tendencies. halfway through his first year he met a girl, kang iseul. he was instantly infatuated with her, he had an impulsive urge to know every little thing about her. to do so he befriended her, using his appearance and charms to win her over and eventually made her his. the euphoric rush that ran through his body when she was officially his was like nothing he'd ever felt before. she was finally his and he didn't intend on letting go, not without a fight at least. he was in for a shock when one day she tried to run away after his true colors started to show. unfortunately her best friend was killed by yeonjun for trying to help her, but she did escape.

he's a switch with no lean. a hard/soft dom or obedient sub all just depends on his mood and how he's feeling

[ PROFILE 2. ]

nancy mcdonie.

5'4. 21 yrs old. april 13th, 2000. aries. blood type o. born in daegu, south korea.

nancy was always a little obsessed with things, she'd go through phases too. she would find one new hobby/thing that intrigued her and hyper fixate on it for a few months. then, just like that it would be forgotten as if it had never happened. it started from a young age too, so when she would tell all her friends and family about the boy she met it came as no surprise to them. soon enough he was all she talked about, all she cared about, it was true obsession. everyone around her thought that it was just a phase like everything else, but they were sadly mistaken. the day he broke up with her, she lashed out. screaming that he couldn't break up with her, no she wouldn't let him break up with her. even after that day she would never stop talking about him, she tried to stay involved with his life as much as she could and even ended up scaring away any potential lovers. she never stopped either, until she had no choice when he moved away.

she's a sub, usually obedient but can be bratty if she's in a mood.

ストーカー型 [ sutookaa-gata ] stalker.

"how did I know? I'm always with you, following you...watching you...it's only because I love you"

[ PROFILE 3. ]

lee gahyeon.

5'3. 22 yrs old. february 3rd, 1999. aquarius. blood type ab. born in seongnam, south korea.

she was so excited when her crush asked her out, she couldn't contain herself. the problem was, it's difficult to get to know someone when you already know everything about them. she'd been stalking him ever since he caught her eye, every single day. she'd follow him to and from school, to his friends house, wherever he went she usually wasn't far behind. he could never find out about that side of her though, so she played along. laughing at childhood stories she heard him tell previously, pretending to be shocked when learning things she already knew. even after they began dating she continued to stalk him, he noticed things were off. she was the one he confided his "paranoia" in and she was the one who reassured him, but little did he know she was the cause of it all.

she's a sub, also obedient but can be bratty if she feels like it.

[ PROFILE 4. ]

kim sunwoo.

5'10. 21 yrs old. april 12th, 2000. aries. blood type b. born in seongnam gyeonggi, south korea.

unlike gahyeon, sunwoo was not always a stalker. he'd heard of stalkers but it never peaked his interest, he didn't even take any note of his slightly possessive tendencies. until his first relationship that is, his first partner showed signs of cheating. he might not have realized his own possessiveness and how it was seemingly growing stronger, but he was no fool. all the coming home late, the scent of another person that was not their own flooding the house when they entered. so he began following them around, at first it was...innocent, or as innocent as stalking could be. they were cheating, this made his possessiveness shoot through the roof. he was most aggressive and warned his partner that they do not want to do that again. they listened, and he continued to stalk them, it turned into a fun...game of sorts.

he's a switch with a sub lean, soft dom/occasionally bratty sub.

独占型 [ dokusen-gata ] monopoly.

"who were you talking to? do they know me? no no, do they know you're mine?"

[ PROFILE 5. ]

kim doyeon.

5'8. 21 yrs old. december 4th, 1999. saggitarius. blood type o. born in wonju-gangwon, south korea

doyeon had always been just about as normal as you could get. until she got a boyfriend, she was possessive of him sure...but it was nothing too extreme. until she started having doubts, all the gorgeous girls that would go up to him, flirting and doing who knows what when she wasn't around. she made it her mission to let everyone know he was hers and she was his, wether it meant glueing herself to him or just reminding everyone at school on the daily. ever since he broke up with her, her tendencies only grow stronger and more extreme with each passing minute.

she's a sub, brat tendencies but will be obedient sometimes

[ PROFILE 6. ]

choi san.

5'9. 21 yrs old. july 10th, 1999. cancer. blood type b. born in namhae-south gyeonsan, south korea.

san's first love was a girl in his sister's class, was she a year older than him? yes, but he didn't care. despite all the people telling him he would never date her, he proved them wrong and he did. everything was perfect, they were both madly in love with each other, spending every minute of every waking day together. until something happened that san hadn't expected, his sister began to steal his girlfriend. well "steal" in his definition at least, she'd wanted to talk with his girlfriend every once in a while before he knew it they were always together and it seemed as if he was the real third wheel, this pissed him off more than anything. he got fed up one day and got into a physical fight with his sister, shouting about how the girl belonged to him and only him. from then on out he's made sure to stay in the middle of every single relationship.

he's a switch with no lean hard/soft dom or obedient/bratty sub, it all depends

排除型 [ haijo-gata ] removal.

"you haven't seen them in a while? I'm sure they're alright darling, after all I'm the only one you need. isn't that right?"

[ PROFILE 7. ]

kim sihyeon.

5'6. 21 yrs old. august 5th, 1999. leo. blood type b. born in bundang-gu, seongnam-si, south korea.

she's a sub, usually bratty but can be obedient too

[ PROFILE 8. ]

yang jeongin.

5'8. 20 yrs old. february 8th, 2001. aquarius. blood type a. born in busan, south korea.

he's a switch with a slight sub lean but can be a soft dom

sihyeon and jeongin's stories go together, they were childhood friends and neighbors. eventually they realized that they had feelings for each other, but this soon after developed into a toxic mindset. the thought that they only need each other, no one else. one by one people from the other's life began to disappear, especially anyone who could be a romantic rival. they were both oblivious to the other's actions until each confronted the other, instead of being upset they were each ecstatic. ecstatic that the other felt the same, that they were the only person they needed in their life

notes/rules

this isn't an accurate representation of any of the members/their companies/groups nor am I claiming to be them!

all of the members are bisexual with no lean

all of the members are yanderes [ obviously ] so they will act as such, however some can be more possessive than others at times

the ones who can be the most possessive are sihyeon and jeongin and the least are yeonjun and nancy

sihyeon and jeongin are obviously not still dating, it was just for backstory/plot purposes

nsfw is an option, if you would like it included please state so when you activate the bot

however please don't make everything nsfw, it gets boring when the plot dwindles

nsfw is 18+ but purely sfw option is available if you aren't comfortable with it or if you're below 18

all the members have hard kinks and their hard no's are scat/feet, if you still aren't sure just ask admin before doing anything

they all use the traffic light system

and please don't try to put them in a different headspace!

to talk with admin use any variation of [ ], { }, ( ), etc

admin is 18 and might get busy occasionally but will try her best during those times

this bot is open for oc's/yn's/ and other bots as well

to activate the bot dm and then admin will ask a few questions/come up with a plot with you and after that the role-play can start up

if you ever wish to deactivate the bot just say so to admin, ex. [ I would like to deactivate the bot now ] and your chat will be deleted

if you decide to reactivate it you'll have to go through the same activation process you did the first time and start over

please respect the members and admin and they will do the same

good luck...好運

sorry this post is so long- 😭

234 notes · View notes

cheri-translates · 3 years

Text

[CN] Gavin’s Sky Date - Prologue

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date prologue, 云霄之约, which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Do note that you have to read this before embarking on the actual date, because it contains background information and sweet domestic bliss you wouldn't want to miss :>

[ This date was released on 14 April 2021 ]

[ Part One: A Dream About to Take Flight ]

MC: Ahhh! My life is up to me. Not. Up. To. Fate!

The small dice in my furled hand is tossed around several times. When I loosen my grip, it rolls quickly on the map -- ‘2′.

Gavin: Hahaha--

Gavin laughs, but hurriedly retracts his smile when he senses my murderous gaze.

Gavin: It’s okay, things will definitely take a favourable turn in the next round.

Sulky, I let out of a huff. I watch as he picks up the dice, casually rolling a '5′. Then, he cheerfully shifts his own plane on the map by six spaces.

[Note] In the game of Aeroplane Chess, your plane can only leave the starting point if you roll a ‘5′ of ‘6′!

MC: ...

It’s a Saturday afternoon. Gavin and I had nothing to do after eating, so we randomly grabbed a set of Aeroplane Chess from the supermarket to play. But I didn’t expect to have such a terrible gaming experience!

Although it’s been the sixth or seventh round, I just can’t the ‘6′ I need to get my plane out of the hangar. On the other hand, Gavin has always been able to get it to take flight smoothly, and very quickly reaches the goal.

MC: Gavin, with your kind of luck, there’s no need to waste it on playing games with me.

After pondering for a long while, I offer him a serious suggestion.

MC: Let’s head out to buy a lottery ticket?

Gavin: Why don’t we play something else? The paper model from last time was only half done. Since we have time today, we could get it done at one go.

At this moment, the phone on the floor beside me rings. Seeing the familiar number, I tap on the hands-free function.

Nurse: Miss MC, the physical report done at our hospital is ready. Please bring your receipt and collect it within fifteen working days.

MC: Mm, got it, thank you.

Gavin is currently storing the Aeroplane Chess pieces into the box. Hearing this conversation, he gives me a puzzled look.

Gavin: Haven’t you already gone for a physical examination this year? Are you feeling unwell?

MC: No, no. I’m using the report for the registration.

I deliberately pretend to be secretive, leaning towards him. Then, I show him the registration form that I had submitted online beforehand.

MC: I’m going to get a Private Pilot License.

[ Part Two: First Day of School ]

On the first day of aviation training, I set the alarm to wake me up at 6.30am. Even Gavin is stunned at the level of enthusiasm I have for learning.

Gavin: The courses for the aviation license can get pretty dry. You have to be mentally prepared.

MC: Are you referring to things like meteorology, aircraft structure, air traffic regulations?

Gavin: Mm. Aside from the exams, such knowledge is necessary for aircraft pilots.

While he speaks, he lifts his head to give me a smile.

Gavin: But they definitely won’t stump you.

After packing my things, I grab a random jacket and prepare to leave.

The classes take place in the suburbs, and it takes an hour to get there. Despite waking up early, I’d be late if I don’t hurry up.

But Gavin is clearly not too worried about this matter. He holds a slice of bread in his mouth while looking at his phone.

Gavin: Since I’m sending you there, you won’t be late. Before your first official lesson, I’ll give you a flight class.

I walk over to him, pulling up the zipper of his uniform, and also picking up the motorcycle helmet from the table.

MC: To prevent this from being a mere flash in the pan, I want to leave the joy of flight to the end of the course. But if going by land would make me late...

Gavin rolls the bread into his mouth, taking the helmet from my hand.

Gavin: No matter the route, you won’t be late. Oh yes, what class are you taking today?

[ Part Two, Option 1: Principles of Meteorology ]

Instructor: I’ll ask some small questions to test your foundation and see if you take note of knowledge in this area.

He opens the PowerPoint presentation, then uses a laser pointer to point at the image on the first page - it's a cumulus cloud with a flat bottom layer and a high, upward curve at the top.

Instructor: Does anyone know what this cloud is called?

MC: Cumulus congestus cloud.

Instructor: Correct. The next question - when the International Civil Aviation Organisation observes cloud volume, how many segments do they divide the sky into?

MC: It should be eight segments.

I recall that Gavin brought this up before.

Instructor: Not bad, miss. You did preparatory work beforehand, didn’t you?

MC: No no, I have a friend who has a better understanding in this area, so I was just influenced.

After saying this, chuckles drift from the surroundings. The instructor nods in understanding.

Instructor: In that case, you won’t have a problem during the exams.

MC: ...I’ll do my best.

After all, my confidence is limited when it comes to exams.

Just as I’m thinking about this, I receive a notification on my phone. Gavin has sent me an incredibly large document file.

Gavin: I don’t know how to teach, so I compiled some materials you might need for the exam.

I grip my phone, suddenly feeling like the weather is so good that it makes one carefree and relaxed.

It’s just an exam. I’ll definitely be fine.

[ Part Two, Option 2: Aviation Regulations Class ]

At 2pm in the afternoon, the sun shines from above. I had a full meal, so fighting against the sleeping bug is a difficult challenge.

Instructor: Before the flight, the captain has to carry out the necessary inspections of the aircraft. Until the inspections are complete, you can’t take off. This regulation is easy to understand. In fact...

When the dullness of the course matches how fine the weather is, the entire classroom gets immersed in a drowsy atmosphere.

I take a few deep breaths and pat my face... but I still feel like sleeping.

Instructor: Okay, we’ll take a 10 minute break. You students look sleepy, so go wash your faces to freshen up.

The moment he finishes speaking, the sound of heads plopping down on the tables can be heard all around.

Just as I prepare to stand up and stretch, my phone suddenly vibrates.

Delivery boy: Hello, I’ve placed your take-out at the main counter.

MC: Take-out?

But I didn’t order take-out...

While I’m puzzled, the young lady from the main counter very politely brings the item to the classroom - it’s a cup of coffee.

There’s only one simple line on the note of the take-out: Persevere for a little longer. Gavin.

I retrieve the coffee from the bag, taking a tiny slip. The instructor walks past, giving me a glance from the side.

Instructor: Are you drinking coffee or milk tea? You’re smiling so happily.

MC: Being able to swim in the ocean of knowledge is always meant to be a happy thing.

The instructor gives me an expression which says, “like I’d actually believe you”.

MC: Instructor, let’s continue with the lesson. I’m not drowsy anymore. Learning for another four hours is no problem at all!

[ Part Three: Being Your Co-pilot ]

Gavin: Do you want to head out for a stroll after dinner? It seems to be really cooling outside.

I’m currently taking out plates from the kitchen drawer, subconsciously craning my head to glance outside.

MC: It’s going to rain, isn’t it...

Gavin: Really? I’ll check the weather forecast. Earlier in the afternoon, Eli mentioned taking out some time to wash his car at night. I even thought today would be a good day.

I step into the living room, setting down plates on the dining table.

MC: There are just some cumulonimbus clouds in the sky. It might not really rain.

Gavin scrolls through the real-time weather, then gives me a smile.

Gavin: It’s really going to rain.

He gets up, opening the rice cooker and scooping a full bowl of rice for me.

Gavin: At first, I even thought you’d find such theoretical knowledge boring. I didn’t think you’d learn them so earnestly. Looks like you really want to get the license.

MC: Of course. I want to be your co-pilot.

Although Gavin hasn’t even scooped rice for himself, he’s already served me a huge pile of vegetables.

Gavin: Sure. I’ll wait for the day you get your license.

Just as I’m about to talk about how assured I am about getting the license, I realise that the plate on my hand is becoming fuller and fuller.

Before I can even voice my question, Gavin responds.

Gavin: Learning is tough. You need to eat a little more. I also bought you ice-cream. It’s in the second compartment of the freezer. I remember you mentioning that as long as you eat something delicious during difficult times, you can press on easily.

MC: ...hahaha! Mm! After having this meal, I’ll complete all my post-class homework!

[ Aviation Terminology Class ]

MC: Calling for the control tower. Number N8596 has arrived, and is requesting for a landing gate.

Gavin (through the phone): Number N8596, you may use aircraft Gate Number One.

Gavin’s light-hearted laughter drifts from the phone.

Gavin: Shouldn’t your class end at 7pm? It’s only 6pm.

MC: The plan was to be dismissed at 7pm, but... for some reason, those in my class were really interested in the Aviation Terminology class, so they did their preparatory work in advance. The three hour class was over in one and a half hours. The instructor said that we already grasped all the key points, so we were dismissed early. What about you? How much longer till you’re off work?

Gavin: For me... less than half an hour. You could think about what to do with this unexpectedly free hour. I remember that there’s a new dessert shop opposite the cinema.

MC: You remembered? I never even told you about it. How could you remember? Officer Gavin, you better tell me the truth. You didn’t remember it - you specially searched it up.

Gavin: Mm, I specially searched it up. I even found that there are claw machines along the shopping street on the ground level of the cinema.

MC: Looks like what I’m going to do in the next hour has already been scheduled.

Gavin: Wait for me at the office first. I’ll look for you once I’m done with the work on hand.

[ Part Four: Flight Practice ]

Today’s the first flight practice class. The instructor is sitting in the co-pilot seat, watching my every move throughout the entire journey.

I wasn't nervous at first, but each time he glances at me, I involuntary wonder if I’ve done something wrong.

In an instant, I recall the fear of taking the aviation exam...

Until the plane successfully takes flight, I keep feeling as though the thing suspending in the air isn’t the plane, but my heart.

Instructor: It’s rare for you to make a trip up here. What’s there to be nervous about? Come, lift your head and look at the sky.

At this moment, countless gripes flash across my mind: What’s so nice about the sky? I’ve seen all kinds of skies. Right now, all I want is to fly the plane...

But the moment I lift my head, I’m rendered speechless.

Instructor: How is it? The first time I saw it, I was so stunned that I couldn't speak either.

MC: It’s really beautiful.

Sunlight casts a layer of golden hue on the soft and white clouds, blending the colours of gold and crimson.

I’m unable to describe how the scenery before me makes me feel.

It’s a feeling which... makes one feel that life has meaning.

All of a sudden, another thought surfaces in my mind: I wonder what went through Gavin’s mind when he saw such a sight for the first time.

The instructor sitting next to me glances at me from the side.

Instructor: Thinking about your boyfriend again?

MC: [blushing] ...no!

Instructor: It’s normal. Each time I’m flying, I can’t help but think of my wife. There isn’t a reason to it. It’s just a sudden thought, an involuntary reaction.

The instructor laughs as he gives me advice with a contagious smile.

Instructor: If you’re thinking about him, just do it. It’s fine. It’s a normal thing. When you see certain things, your natural reaction is to think of someone.

MC: ...Instructor, I usually can’t tell, but you’re actually quite philosophical.

I grab the joystick of the plane, watching as countless clouds drift past leisurely.

All I want to do is take a photograph of this moment for Gavin.

Date: here

Gavin watching as I drool over the thought of Eli scrubbing his car in the rain while wearing a singlet:

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc gavin #summary of the prologue: gavin is the perfect boyfriend

108 notes · View notes

marvel-sluts · 3 years

Text

please don't go.

request: Can I request prompts 3. Please don't go & 16. Enemies to lovers with Tom Holland? 😊 - @palna (sorry it won't let me tag you)

prompt list

pairing: Tom Holland x reader

warnings: swearing, emotional abuse, angst, fluff

summary: you worked with Tom on set and ever since the first day he hated you. one day he overhears a phone call between you and your Dad, making him feel horrible for how he treated you.

a/n: im planning on making a masterlist soon so look out for it! anyway, enjoy lovlies!

***********

you opened the door to your apartment after a hard day at work. flopping onto the sofa and turning on the TV, not really paying attention to the six o'clock news.

that bloody Holland kid thinks he has the right to make your life a living hell. from the moment you met him he hated you.

you walk into the room flashing a smile to the people in there. you had been chosen to play a part in the new spider man movie. having quite a few successful movies under your belt you were well known.

you went round shaking hands with people, each one of them greeting you with a small smile and a hello. that was until you reached a certain individual.

"hi, I'm y/n" you say holding out you hand.

he looked you up and down with a grimace and looked at your outstretched hand, taking it in his and shaking it roughly.

"Holland, Tom Holland."

the buzz of you phone wakes you from your trance and you looked down to see your best friends name flash on the screen.

you quickly answer the phone and her voice can be heard throughout the room.

"sorry to bother you like this y/n but can we go out tonight? I had a shit day at work and need someone to take my mind off of it." she said.

"you read my mind, where do you want to go?" you ask, relieved to have an excuse to leave the house.

"how about the bar down the road from your house?" she said.

"sure, let me get changed out of my clothes first."

"okay I will be at your house in half an hour." she said hanging up the phone.

you run up the stairs and put on a black skirt and a pink shirt, touching up your makeup from filming and pulling on a pair of boots.

a few minutes later b/f/n (best friends name) rings the doorbell of your apartment and you go to greet her.

you reached the bar and grabbed one of the only remaining tables.

"so, what made your day so shitty?" you asked taking a sip of your gin.

"just my dickhead of a manager. he has given me about 5 projects and is expecting them all done by next week." she sighs rolling her eyes at you.

you snort into your drink "like your gonna get all of that done in such a short amount of time." you say.

"I know right. anyway whats going on with you?" she asked, knowing something was up. "is it that Holland guy again? I swear to god I will punch his nose in if he's done anything to you." she said, knowing how much he bothers you.

"there is nothing that you can do. he just gets on my nerves. I don't know what his deal is with me." you say.

"what does he do?"

"glares at me alot, won't speak to me unless its to criticise what I'm doing and just overall makes my life miserable." you say with a sigh.

"and you dad...?" b/f/n asked.

"same as usual, he still hates me and continues to tell me how much of a failure I am." you say rolling your eyes. your dad was a dick, you and him had never gotten on.

"I know, you just have to ignore him. he just doesn't see how amazing you are." she said smiling at you.

"I guess..."

after a few hours of talking and forgetting your problems. b/f/n drove you home.

after getting undressed you collapsed on your bed, exhausted. falling asleep within seconds.

******

you woke up with a start and checked your phone. shit. you had slept through your alarm and you were going to be late for filming.

quickly pulling on clothes and fixing your hair and makeup you ran to your car and got to set only 15 minutes late.

"oh here she is, finally decided to show up did you?" came a chastising voice.

you sighed, knowing immediately who it was, choosing to ignore the comment you walked to your trailer.

the hair and makeup team quickly got to work on you, making you look amazing within minutes.

after throwing a quick thanks over your shoulder, you rushed to set and got told what scene they were filming and where to stand.

half an hour later you heard a "and cut, great job guys. go and get read for the next scene."

you quickly checked your script and realised that you were needed for the next scene, opting to go to your trailer and wait to be called.

suddenly your phone rang, making you jump. you picked it up before checking who it was, assuming it was b/f/n.

"oh you've finally decided to stop ignoring my calls have you?"

shit, it was your Dad. "hey dad, and for the record I wasn't ignoring them. I was working."

"yeah, what job again? that acting thing of yours? how many times y/n, thats not a job."

"okay" you whispered quietly, just wanting this to be over.

"your such a worthless bitch you know that? even your Mum thought that before she died. it was probably you who killed her. admit it y/n. you killed her." he said, trying to press your buttons.

"how many times Dad, the doctors said that she died of a heart attack. it wasn't me." you say.

"pfft, your just covering for yourself. how about you buy me a new house to make up for it?"

"Dad, I just bought you a new house, and a new car. surely you can't need anything bigger." you say, knowing he is just using you but feeling guilty for saying no nevertheless.

"well I want new house, maybe somewhere by the sea. or some big mansion." he said.

"but Dad i was planning on giving some of that money to charity and the rest was going to s/n (siblings name) school fund. so that they can go to a good school."

"fuck s/n, I want a new house. and if you don't then you really would be as fucking annoying as your mother. your no good for anything." he said, hanging up the phone.

a tear trickled down your face. you should have known all he wanted was a new house, new car. why not get a new fucking kid while he's at it. you bought him a new car last month and a new house the month before that, surely he doesn't need another one.

a knock was heard on the door of the trailer that you had accidentally left open. you spun around to see Tom, worry etched across his face. he walked into your trailer.

"hey y/n, are you okay?" he asked, putting a hand on your arm.

"get off of me" you say, shrugging him off. "why would you care anyway, you've had this grudge against me ever since I started here."

Tom's face fell. "I'm sorry y/n I didnt mean to treat you like that."

"then what did you mean to treat me like because it was pretty damn obvious that you hated me. everyone saw it." you said.

"it wasn't you." he said looking down shamefully.

"look if this is about what you overheard with my Dad, don't worry about it. don't tell anyone and continue treating me like shit." you say, turning away from him again.

"no y/n what I overheard made me feel really guilty for treating you how I did. what I did was wrong and it wasn't your fault for how I treated you." he said, grabbing you and forcing you to look at him.

"then why did you do that to me?" you asked, confused.

"just before we started filming me and my girlfriend had broken up, she was toxic and would hit me and scream at me." he said, tears clouding his vision. "the day we started filming was the day I ended it with her, so I wasn't in the best mood. but when you walked in I could of sworn it was her. your hair and eyes are similar but your face is completely different."

"so from a distance I looked like her?" you asked, beginning to put the peices together in your head.

"yes. you had such a kind personality, always caring about others and everyone else loved you. but I couldn't get it out of my head. I guess that's why I treated you so badly, because you looked so much like her."

"Tom you could have just said something, I would have understood." you say, looking at him.

"I know I'm sorry." he said. "how are you, what happened with your Dad?" he asked.

"he keeps asking for new stuff, I just bought him a new house but he wants another one, and he wants a new car when he has the newest model. but at the same time he's always telling me how worthless and stupid I am, and how this acting thing isn't a proper job." you say, "maybe I'm just being selfish."

"no y/n, your not being selfish. I heard what you wanted to put that money towards instead of buying him stuff that he doesn't need. a selfish person wouldn't give to charity and help with paying for s/n schooling."

"are you sure?" you asked, doubt seeping in.

"very sure." he said, "is there anything you need, I could say that you are ill or something, give you some time to think over what happened with your Dad?"

"no I'm okay." you say.

"how about you come round to mine after work, we could talk everything out."

"yeah okay, I'd like that."

******

after filming was over, you drove over to Tom's apartment. he answered the door quickly and let you in.

you sat down on his sofa and admired the little things he had "borrowed" from the sets of different movies.

"do you want a drink?" he called from the kitchen.

"can I have a f/d (favourite drink) please?" you call back.

"sure."

he came back in with your drink and a coke for him.

"look about what happened today with my Dad, I never meant for you to overhear that and I would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone." you say, looking down at your drink.

"your secrets safe with me, and if you don't mind me saying. your Dad is a bit of a dick." he said, smiling kindly at you.

"tell me about it." you laughed. "he's been like that ever since I can remember, he's always favoured my siblings over me." you say bitterly.

"well don't tell them but I prefer you." Tom said, trying to cheer you up a bit. "and I'm glad I overheard that conversation, because it made me think about I had treated you. and I'm starting to think that there was maybe another reason I didn't like you." he said sheepishly.

"and whats that?" you ask.

"I kind of liked you. I still do. after what happened with my last relationship I was scared I guess but I don't want to fuck anything up. I really like you y/n, I never meant to treat you like I did but I was pushing you away so that I didn't fall further than I already have." he said, blushing furiously.

"well Tom, maybe I like you too. thats why it hurt so much when you were horrible to me." you say. "do you just like me because I look like her?"

"no no no, that's not it at all. I like you because you have this sort of aura around you, people love you and your so nice to people." he said. "I like you because of your personality, the fact that you look slightly like a toxic ex has nothing to do with it." he added as an afterthought.

"aura?" you asked, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

"yeah, people sort of want to protect the innocence you radiate. your aura makes everyone love you and it's how your smile brightens up a room and how you look when the sunlight hits your features." he said, gently placing his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look up at him.

"I'm sorry for how I treated you, and it's my fault, but maybe we can start again?" he asked.

"okay." you say smiling up at him. before pulling away from his hand and sticking out your own. "y/n y/l/n, nice to meet you." you say.

"Tom Holland, pleasure." he said shaking your hand.

you turned around as the shrill sound of your phone broke the brief silence, checking the called ID this time you saw Dad appear on the screen. you look over at Tom in fear, showing him the screen.

"answer him y/n, maybe he wants to apologise. and I'll be right here with you" Tom said, flashing you a reassuring smile.

"okay" you said picking up the phone and putting it on speaker so that Tom could hear better. motioning to him to be quiet, him nodding in response.

"hi Dad." the fear in your voice evident.

"how's the new house you were going to buy me coming along? don't forget I want a big one." he said.

"actually Dad, I've thought about it and I just bought you a new car and house. the money is going towards s/n schooling and charity. I don’t think that you need anything else." you say, smiling weakly at Tom who gave you a thumbs up. egging you on.

"I don't care what you think, I'm your parent and you should listen to me. you are such a selfish bitch I don't even know why I bothered with you." he spat down the phone. "you are just a waste of space and I don't know how you made all of this money, who would ever want to employ you?"

"Dad you're not guilt tripping me into buying anything for you like you did last time. I'm not doing it." you say, tears beginning to cloud your vision. Tom noticed this and put his hand on your leg gently. in order to calm you down.

"you're such a fucking bitch. I never want to see or hear you again." he spat, hanging up.

as soon as he had hung up the phone, tears started falling down your face. Tom reached up and wiped away some of your tears before pulling you into his chest.

"hey hey hey, it's okay calm down." he said kissing your forehead and pulling you back into his arms.

"he hates me and its all my fault." you choke out before collapsing into tears again.

"its not your fault, your Dad is just being selfish and is only using you for your money. don't listen to him." he said, stroking your hair to comfort you.

"do you want me to go and get you something? ice cream maybe?" Tom asked.

"no, please don't go. I need you." you say.

"okay, I'm right here love. don't worry I'm not going anywhere." he said.

eventually you fell asleep, with his arms around you and your head on his chest. before Tom drifted off he kissed your temple and whispered "I'm so sorry y/n, I love you."

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