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#how much they care about bullying others
thegoldenavenger · 1 month
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Liu Qingge date lineup… I was thinking about how funny it would be to see how dating might change your lifestyle
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spicypussywave · 2 months
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i love myung ha so much i need him to be real
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adelle-ein · 4 months
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saw some old stuff i wrote about 3h and man. i really used to love that game huh
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irregularbillcipher · 7 months
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going over old fic notes and outlines and character talks with friends and it's always really funny when i get to the stuff i was developing early-mid 2019 where bill just literally kept kryptos around to rag on, and he genuinely just. did not like the man. like was just completely annoyed with his general existence. boy have things changed
#for anyone curious: i came to the conclusion that no amount of 'this guy sucks but he's fun to bully' would get bill to keep someone around#for like literal eons. bill gets bored of his toys too quickly. he'd break 'em. plus the fact that bill decided he was worth saving to begi#with. there was at first an element of 'i owe the guy' because [FIC SPOILERS] and a grudging 'if i had a gun to my head i'd say he was my#best friend i GUESS but do not tell him that' but no real genuine friendship or anything more#before realizing that with the specific story i was going to tell it just made the most sense to have these assholes still be like.#bad people for sure but to actually care about each other. it also just felt too easy to write bill off as someone whose cruelty is just#a lack of certain emotions. like that doesn't automatically make a bad person and a bad person doesn't automatically lack emotion#(there's a character that'll be introduced sometime soon who is aroace and doesn't make friends easily and she's lovely because...)#(idk man. i'm aroace and why shouldn't she be. a lack of affection doesn't make you bad and the ability to feel it doens't make you good)#so bill can and does love people-- even if actual vulnerability is near impossible to get from him-- and kryptos is included in that#it's just that he still sucks really bad and hurts and even kills people that he loves because again. bad person who has no idea how to#navigate relationships healthily because of his own baggage and the environment he grew up in#(also in canon he usually does not want to navigate relationships healthily because. again. he sucks!)#so the only lasting relationship he's ever had where he isn't trying to hurt someone is still just... messy as hell#(and to be fair kryptos is also a p. bad person by adulthood it's just that they're pretty young at this point in the fic)#(so there's less avenues to show that)#kryptos being desperate for any scrap of attention and bill providing the only attention he's ever gotten was always the vibe#but it really was much more of a 'bully and bulling victim who he lets hang around him because said victim'#'is like the only one willing to talk to him' dynamic which is... very much not the case anymore#as said in the tags of my fic. these awful shapes care about each other as best they can care about anyone#anyway sorry idk how much anyone really cares about these tag essays but theyre helpful for me to get my thought process like... down#and track how different the story used to be
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could cozy up to me- ahem
#ash rambles 💚#i love him soooo much! i know i get stubborn about it sometimes but he really does have my heart#him and ash get together post-game so i love writing him and his development and him learning to be a better person#theyre not together during the game. theyre enemies during the game. theyre also both kinda immature late teenagers/young adults#(i just wanna make it clear that there's nothing weird there going on!! he and ash have had mutual attraction to each other since they were#kids but they dont get together until theyre adults and he is an adult in canon!!!)#but back to what i was saying#his development with ash is sooo goooddd! they spend a little while doing mercenary work together! ash has quite long hair and man ajsjajsh#the way he learns how to take care of her hair always makes me soo warm and fuzzy inside! he may be a bit of a meanie but he is a#surprisingly affectionate bf! f.f8 s/i probably also straightens her curly hair like i do and he just likes helping and stroking her hair#there's a lot of playful bickering though! lots of matches of triple triad too! whoever loses does the dishes LMAAOO#man.. he's so handsome and strong... i love how he's always so dedicated to being a knight and a protector... i know he uses that as an#excuse to like. do horrific things in the game but!!! in the mobile game you can see him develop and i really do like his redemption arc#from mean ass bully to kinda mean ally that'll protect you no matter what. his character is so good especially when you consider that he's#literally been forced into training since he was five. lots of things to analyze and think about there#but back to the knight thing!! he always says he's ash's knight! makes my heart flutter hehe! though he is very well-aware that ash could#kick his ass... and he loves it! he's not big on using her beloved guns (shes very picky about who touches her sweethearts too) but he does#like watching her epic gunslinger gf in action hehehe! okay yeah i think thats enough rambling for now#i got sick 😔 i'm okay and it'll pass but expect a lot of half-asleep f/o rambles LMAAOOO#okay yeah. tldr: i <3 s.eifer a.lmasy#your knight until the end 🤍
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🐕‍🦺
#sat down with two dog groomer friends after a movie night this past weekend and discussed dog breeds#they are the best people to ask about dog breeds because they have a good idea not just on behavior but on general care needs#(and also they know me unlike my vet or the boarding kennel)#I finally nailed them down long enough to get their opinion on the best dog breed for me and the winner is a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel!#if I felt like going for a large breed the Bernese Mountain Dog is top of the list but if I ever got another dog I'd want something smaller#my needs:#1) has to be pretty or at least interesting to look at because I'm vain#2) minimal health concerns for the breed (major things like how GSDs have bad joints or Great Danes have the weird stomach issues)#3) friendly and intelligent but not desperate for mental stimulation 24/7 (this is why I can't do Border Collies)#(or really most shepherds much as I love them)#and lemme tell you this really narrowed the field and pretty much eliminated all mid-size breeds#because those tend to be high-energy working dogs#or balls of anxiety like bully breeds#other options: greyhounds? some mastiffs if I wanted large (the one girl brought up those HUGE leonbergers lol and newfies)#and the fourth girl there discovered basenjis which I know and love but from a distance#but in the end it kind of confirmed I'm best suited for cats these days#except I LOVE having a dog to go hiking with me since apparently the cats aren't about that#(I did try)#yes I realize my dog is alive and well but also I'm a planner#I like lists
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wheatstar · 4 months
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why is shadow so hard to get through i want to be done with it so bad... really really not looking forward to thunder
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naegashutyoassup · 2 years
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I had just listened to this song and this was the FIRST time in a long time i actually enjoyed a SHINee song like wth-
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vzajemnik · 10 months
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life is so crazy sometimes you meet a couple that you love so much and its clear they love each other so much and then you come home and have a dream how all 3 of you are in a relationship and its been a year and you still think about it. you know
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ptsdpizzaparty · 1 year
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i hate my brain so much. like i don’t want to waste so much emotional energy on hating myself, this entirely self-absorbed way of being, but it is so fucking hard when i only ever do or say the wrong fucking thing
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princemick-archive · 1 year
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🌸 do your worst
no <3
mutuals send a 🌸 and I'll compliment you
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killmebythebeach · 1 year
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Just finished tma. I have to go to fucking school tomorrow. How do I FUCKING BE A PERSON AFTER THAT?!?!
I'll probably reblog with more tags later (cuz 30 just isn't enough) but !!!
#you know the drill tma spoilers in the tags dont read tags unless youve watcged the whole series. statement begins#i never really cry over fiction and that held true but FUCK did i get close when jon said 'that ones for sasha'#ill get to the lamenting but let me talk about my fucking !!! first. helen my beloathed i was so fucking happy when you died#i enjoyed her character imensly but GOD was it satisfying to hear jon say 'helen... was that a lie?' and !!! shes a gaslight girlboss#hearing jude and notsasha get smited was also so good. hmmmm i love how slimy jude sounds and how corparate notsasha sounds too#love the moment when all the acatars jon kills realises theyve fucked up (careful who you bully in middleschool)#and daisy and basira :( never liked those two too much but it was still sad :( basira confuses me from a worldbuilding standpoint#i love it though. shes the only person in daisys domain and i think thats metal as fuck. but seeing trevor and breekon alone made me sad#and annabelle!!! stunning. love her. would die for her. shed let it happen.#that being said i want to punch her so fucking bad. shes the tape recorders?#i saw this post where it was like 'what kind of kid was jon that the web thought hed bring the apocolypse?' and i thought itwas exagerating#georgie and melanie! georgie was a favorite from s3 so im glad we get to see her a bit more! even if shes a... cult leader?#oh :( when jon leaves them to get martin from annabelle and when he comes back the other seven survivors are gone :(#i hate all the arguing though :( i have the nuance of an oreo so seeing my blorbos argue just makes me sad :(#anyway. night night my beloved. recollections my beloved. wonderland my beloved. checking out my beloved. gah!#and the rosie and elias statements!!! ive always wondered about rosie and now i wish i never found out!#and hearing jonah and jon work together on the elias statement sounded SO COOL!!!#with jonah being like the voices of all the people hes inhabited. and all the archivists wandering london like zombies!#i was sort of disapointed jonah wasnt like super hard to defeat but holy shiiiiiiiiiit#i. LOVE. the 200 statement. its like 10 minutes long but i just might have to make an animatic of it.#oh its so fucking cool. i always imagined the web and eye as the smart entity power duo but no.#the web was playing the eye like a cheap whistle the entire time. i guess the eye does need avatars to actually do much#like lonely your alone. end you die. desolation is your fault. spiral is all you. but eye needs people to do stuff with its information#martin and jon. Martin and Jon. MARTIN AND JON.#those fucking idiots. hearing martin enter the room and both him and the listeners realizing what happened felt like ORPHEUS turning around#dude. martin stabbing jon always gets joked about. i thought itd be a light hearted moment or some shit#and hearing the three girls at the end. basiras 'good luck'. gah. just hearing the birds chirping was enough#but i also get to know simon was probably mauled to death by a crowd wich i find hilarious.#jonahs 'good luck' as well. like sir. jonah fucking magnus does not have the right to choke me up.#the magnus archives
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a-little-bit-poss · 2 years
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myownprivatcidaho · 2 years
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#personal#ok putting this in the tags cuz its just all over thw place but. few things abt my brother and stranger things#for starters im re/watching it with my brother this summer cause he LOVES it and doesnt rlly have access to online streaming#even though i think the show sucks shit now its. honestly sth i really appreciate because hes autistic and that show is HUGE to him#like he really really cares ab it#and this all isnt. like universal statements on what the show means to all autistic ppl i just Need to talk ab what it means to him#hes only seen s1 so far but its like. it makes me wanna CRY i didnt even think ab it until he started talking a lot ab it after he saw it#cause like. a story about a girl whos different and grew up closed off from others and feels separated from others and is bullied for it#but shes not a joke in the story shes POWERFUL and finds people who LOVE her.#so sth he does is he assigns people irl to characters in movies and shows he likes. so ever since seeing s1 hes said hes like el#and theres a person who puts a lot of effort into being gentle with him & making him feel loved and accepted & he says that person is mike#its like!!!! yeah being pessimistic ab the show onlineis easy#but idk how to explain how Huge it is to watch him grow up feeling set apart and crying because he feels like nobody wants to be his friend#and just to see him LOVE this show and LOVE watching el onscreen being celebrated for who she is as a person. like thats Huge for him#and its huge to SEE secondhand like jesus man#but yeah i just needed to put that somewhere. i love him very much#but yeag we're gonna start watching soon. this moderately shifts topical directions#but basically ive been thinking ab it a lot because the new season is out and i want to watch it w him before i leave#but im SO worried ab showing him s4 if this is bad im gonna feel SO bad ab showing it to him#and theres sth about what that says ab how the shows gone thats SO pathetic im yelling.#anyways. thats not a jab on my brother im just saying i hope the duffers DONT fuck this up cause goddamn#but yeag
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emo-oreo · 5 months
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#me at school vibes except I'm gonna impulsively respond with the same energy and then overthink it for the next two weeks instead#and never talk with them again bcs the thought of it ever being real kinda makes me want to cry#but crying because someone was nice to you isn't socially normal and I don't want extra attention#and i suck at making friends and staying friends irl and they have a lot of other friends and don't really care about it as much as i would#i mean it's just a one time situation because i don't know wtf I'm supposed to talk about after trying to start a conversation so i just#don't. and it wasn't anything special to them if they have a natural instinct to talk with whoever is currently sitting next to them...#and always hang out with a group of friends i don't want to hang out with i mean nothing personal i just feel out of place in groups#this sucks anyone else would've already forgotten that situation what's wrong with my brain.#I hate how everyone always leaves an empty seat between us or a whole group sits in a different row and there's one empty row with just me#i'm not getting bullied like in elementary and no one is making excuses to not let me do group projects with them like in high school but i#genuinely hate it#At the same time i don't really have the energy to make friends because of how busy the schedule is and because i don't get enough sleep so#if anyone tried talking to me it would be a disaster anyway#Even worse when it's not empty but like three people sit there and put all of their jackets on the seat next to me#ik it's nothing personal but it feels like a wall made of their friendship between me and them#like normal people would just put their stuff near their own seat???#wait I'm in no position to say that they're the normal people#I don't think it's weird i just want what they have#Won't ever have it because of my trust issues abandonment issues and rejection sensitive dysphoria and an untreated attachment disorder.#I feel like if i make one (1) more friend and they leave too i won't be able to make friends ever again#The thing is there's no guarantee someone won't leave#and you can't make close friends without emotional commitment#and if i put effort in it it'll just hurt more when they leave#and the probability of our personalities being suitable for a friendship and that we want the same kind of friendship is lower than 20%..#i guess.. based on my previous life experiences#no actually 20 is a little too high.. a lot too high actually#20 is almost 1 in 4 people but there wasn't 1 in 30 in hs..#3% chance maybe#and being friends when you just say hi every day and they keep talking with their friends is basically torture#vent 1/?
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teddylupin · 7 months
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