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#how to create leaf
pink-pone · 5 months
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So far I’ve been keeping all my ocs living in this one town in Equestria I made up (a coastal town called Maple Leaf) and only just now have I considered making multiple towns or at least other areas lol. My original setup would be the main, easy-going town of Maple Leaf, with cottages and shops interspersed along the coast. Then a more urban area with modest skyscrapers and such towards the inland (but now that I think about it, it could also just be further down the coast.) and then maybe even have some neighborhoods in the sky, like on clouds like Cloudsdale but near the mountains/hills that encircle Maple Leaf. Idk for sure, as I’m like the most indecisive person alive, but it is fun to brainstorm :)
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moregraceful · 7 months
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picture the trope where A rushes up to B at a crowded bar or club and says please please do a me a favor and kiss me/act like my date to make my ex jealous/make this asshole stop hitting on me/some other urgent reason. who on the Giants, Sharks, and/or Cuda is most likely to be A? who as B is most likely to say sure I got ya? who is most likely to say fuck no? you can answer within each team or across teams, however you like.
omg well first of all I would be remiss in admitting that I sort of wrote this fic with Kris Bryant and Brandon Crawford, when I was deep in my Kris Bryant Is A Giant thirst and very foolishly believed Farhan Zaidi did not want me dead in the delta somewhere, BUT it lacked urgency. also it's not very good. but it exists, as a time capsule...
Giants: I truly believe Patrick Bailey is so goofy in private that he doesn't know shit about fuck but he IS good in a crisis, so he cheerfully kisses the hell out of Brett Wisely when Brett begs him to play along to get this asshole off his back. (ig we're going rookies tonight.) conversely Joc Pederson would say fuck no bc I don't trust him and also the Rogers twins would be too confused to play along appropriately but their corpse-like pallor and dead-eyed stares would get the job done just the same. I love them. Anyway I chose Brett Wisely for A bc sometimes he reminds me of a nervous purse dog
Sharks: this was so hard bc I don't actually know who is on the Sharks...I think Oskar Lindblom is still a Shark?? and I think he would be in a club and some guys would get too weird about him AND! controversial opinion, I think he would turn to Mario Ferraro for help bc no one's fucking with a guy with no teeth even if that guy reviews bagels on Youtube. Mario doesn't kiss him but he very possessively puts an arm around Oskar and smiles with zero teeth. Also Vlasic would say no to kissing, but he does start talking so loudly about water filtration and body decomposition that the guys who were getting too wild with Oskar get freaked out and leave them alone. Oskar is A because he is very pretty and often looks startled
Cuda: Daniil Gushchin needs to make his ex jealous...thanks for being my guy, tall Russian guy with a sweet smile <3 Nikolai Knyzhov is not his guy, he does not want this, his sexuality crisis is private and personal, but when a feral little man is climbing him like a tree, what is he going to do honestly. This guy seems like he might bite hard enough to draw blood if Nikolai drops him?? Guess he's gotta kiss him. This is a crossover bc I just looked at the Cuda roster and Kny isn't listed however it's important to me that Goosh and Kny kiss. Also I think Shakir Mukhamadullin would be so startled he would say no but then he would feel really bad and buy Goosh a drink so the ex gets jealous in the end anyway. I also got in at the ground floor of the Artem Guryev hype machine last year at the rookie tournament and I'm determined to get everybody on fuckin board this year now that he's with the team for real, so I'm saying he doesn't say yes to kissing but he does IMMEDIATELY start swinging, which is not what Goosh wanted, but is, in some ways, even better.
Thank you for asking...this made me so happy to think about...
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lyanro · 1 year
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…How do we feel about the environmental implications of certain very tiktok-friendly Small Business Crafts such as resin work and polymer clay jewelry. I know that I feel and think things about them but I don’t really know what those things are
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arsonicversed · 2 years
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WHICH ALSO DOESN’T GET INTO THE FACT THAT KARIN IS IN SOME WAYS BY FAR HEALTHIER THAN THE AVERAGE VILLAGER LIKE MITO BECAUSE SHE HAS ACCESS TO TECHNOLOGY, MEDCINE THAT ISN’T JUST MEDICAL-JUSTUS WHATEVER, BUT ALSO ACTUAL SCIENCE AND MEDICATION THAT COULD ONLY MAKE HER LIFE LAST LONGER
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#originally i was thinking it was so impressive if bonny created actual sentient artificial intelligence (NOT a large language model lol)#but i don't think any of the clones count as ai at all i think they're literal clones BUT that's still extremely impressive to me she's#just referred to as someone who only cares about relatively less futuristic straightforward machines but she's literally a genius#who still fiddles w/ clones and has a very advanced understanding of biology and computers. and is also a mechanic and#clockmaker and severely overqualified for basically anything STEM-related 👁👄👁 i need to discuss this more bc HELP???#she is so scary smart and the game is just like <3 clocks and easy bake ovens and <3 human clones with#computer brains <3 and sewing machines and automobile mechanic slang and recycling <3#can u rewind to everything human clone related i am a bit fixated on how she also just casually knows about genetics#it's just treated like smth she dabbles in like her passion is machinery but then she has a little hobby in stem cell therapy#but let's just brush over that nsksososksnsdbs#dykwim like she was an organic machine operator and the game seems to only really treat the machine part like it's important#like. u can't really be an organic ROBOT. there r so many *cyborgs* in this game#i am so invested in this sjnshdhshb bc it's more interesting to me & also it's okay to just treat living people with artificlal body parts#as very extremely different from robots#bonny canonically underestimating her skills would be kind of funny (like very ironic if she only saw her clockmaking as interesting)#and cute though.. or maybe she is just trying very hard to turn a new leaf except the summers are a thing that is happening in her life#she is still doing stuff with clones so i think it's just the game being a little inconsistent which is very on par#like bonny is secretive but idk the way her ability to clone people is not treated as a life science accomplishment is wild to me
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I saw this on quora and thought it was cool and wanted to share it on here.  Its a long read but crazy.  Its from Erik Painter
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They did try. And they did capture Navajo men. However, they were unsuccessful in using them to decipher the code. The reason was simple. The Navajo Code was a code that used Navajo. It was not spoken Navajo. To a Navajo speaker, who had not learned the code, a Navajo Code talker sending a message sounds like a string of unconnected Navajo words with no grammar. It was incomprehensible. So, when the Japanese captured a Navajo man named Joe Kieyoomia in the Philippines, he could not really help them even though they tortured him. It was nonsense to him.
The Navajo Code had to be learned and memorized. It was designed to transmit a word by word or letter by letter exact English message. They did not just chat in Navajo. That could have been understood by a Navajo speaker, but more importantly translation is never, ever exact. It would not transmit precise messages. There were about 400 words in the Code.
The first 31 Navajo Marines created the Code with the help of one non-Navajo speaker officer who knew cryptography. The first part of the Code was made to transmit English letters. For each English letter there were three (or sometimes just two) English words that started with that letter and then they were translated into Navajo words. In this way English words could be spelled out with a substitution code. The alternate words were randomly switched around. So, for English B there were the Navajo words for Badger, Bear and Barrel. In Navajo that is: nahashchʼidí, shash, and tóshjeeh. Or the letter A was Red Ant, Axe, or Apple. In Navajo that is: wóláchííʼ, tsénił , or bilasáana. The English letter D was: bįįh=deer, and łééchąąʼí =dog, and chʼįįdii= bad spiritual substance (devil).
For the letter substitution part of the Code the word “bad” could be spelled out a number of ways. To a regular Navajo speaker it would sound like: “Bear, Apple, Dog”. Or other times it could be “ Barrel, Red Ant, Bad Spirit (devil)”. Other times it could be “Badger, Axe, Deer”. As you can see, for just this short English word, “bad” there are many possibilities and to the combination of words used. To a Navajo speaker, all versions are nonsense. It gets worse for a Navajo speaker because normal Navajo conjugates in complex ways (ways an English or Japanese speaker would never dream of). These lists of words have no indicators of how they are connected. It is utterly non-grammatical.
Then to speed it up, and make it even harder to break, they substituted Navajo words for common military words that were often used in short military messages. None were just translations. A few you could figure out. For example, a Lieutenant was “one silver bar” in Navajo. A Major was “Gold Oak Leaf” n Navajo. Other things were less obvious like a Battleship was the word for Whale in Navajo. A Mine Sweeper was the Navajo word for Beaver.
A note here as it seems hard for some people to get this. Navajo is a modern and living language. There are, and were, perfectly useful Navajo words for submarines and battleships and tanks. They did not “make up words because they had no words for modern things”. This is an incorrect story that gets around in the media. There had been Navajo in the military before WWII. The Navajo language is different and perhaps more flexible than English. It is easy to generate new words. They borrow very few words and have words for any modern thing you can imagine. The words for telephone, or train, or nuclear power are all made from Navajo stem roots.
Because the Navajo Marines had memorized the Code there was no code book to capture. There was no machine to capture either. They could transmit it over open radio waves. They could decode it in a few minutes as opposed to the 30 minutes to two hours that other code systems at the time took. And, no Navajo speaker who had not learned the Code could make any sense out of it.
The Japanese had no published texts on Navajo. There was no internationally available description of the language. The Germans had not studied it at the time. The Japanese did suspect it was Navajo. Linguists thought it was in the Athabaskan language family. That would be pretty clear to a linguist. And Navajo had the biggest group of speakers of any Athabaskan language. That is why they tortured Joe Kieyoomia. But, he could not make sense of it. It was just a list of words with no grammar and no meaning.
For Japanese, even writing the language down from the radio broadcasts would be very hard. It has lots of sounds that are not in Japanese or in English. It is hard to tell where some words end or start because the glottal stop is a common consonant. Frequency analysis would have been hard because they did not use a single word for each letter. And some words stood for words instead of for a letter. The task of breaking it was very hard.
Here is an example of a coded message:
béésh łigai naaki joogii gini dibé tsénił áchį́į́h bee ąą ńdítį́hí joogi béésh łóó’ dóó łóóʼtsoh
When translated directly from Navajo into English it is:
“SILVER TWO BLUE JAY CHICKEN HAWK SHEEP AXE NOSE KEY BLUE JAY IRON FISH AND WHALE. “
You can see why a Navajo who did not know the Code would not be able to do much with that. The message above means: “CAPTAIN, THE DIVE BOMBER SANK THE SUBMARINE AND BATTLESHIP.”
“Two silver bars” =captain. Blue jay= the. Chicken hawk= dive bomber. Iron fish = sub. Whale= battleship. “Sheep, Axe Nose Key”=sank. The only normal use of a Navajo word is the word for “and” which is “dóó ”. For the same message the word “sank” would be spelled out another way on a different day. For example, it could be: “snake, apple, needle, kettle”.
Here, below on the video, is a verbal example of how the code sounded. The code sent below sounded to a Navajo speaker who did not know the Code like this: “sheep eyes nose deer destroy tea mouse turkey onion sick horse 362 bear”. To a trained Code Talker, he would write down: “Send demolition team to hill 362 B”. The Navajo Marine Coder Talker then would give it to someone to take the message to the proper person. It only takes a minute or so to code and decode.
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coruscatiio · 1 year
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tag drop for the treasurer
006.  CAROLINA. among the flowers‚ you hide your aching heart (visage)
006.  CAROLINA. the sight of flowers makes you dream (in character)
006.  CAROLINA. you've been longing for daisies to push through the floor (main)
006.  CAROLINA. asters‚ roses and violets (&ooba)
006.  CAROLINA. before‚ you only saw grey. now‚ everything is bright (about)
006.  CAROLINA. you paint flowers into thin air‚ you endlessly create (aesthetic)
006.  CAROLINA. obscure‚ exasperating‚ delightful (thoughts)
006.  CAROLINA. you got dreams no one can take away (esque)
006.  CAROLINA. autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower (isms)
006.  CAROLINA. how beautiful leaves grow old‚ how full of light and colour are their last days (drabble)
006.  CAROLINA. without songs‚ life would not taste as sweet (music)
006.  CAROLINA. flowers in the garden are like stars in the skies (capricorn)
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headspace-hotel · 6 months
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Fact is, mechanical mowing is nothing at all like grazing in terms of its impacts upon a plant community.
Grazing animals are selective in how they forage, eating plants they find tastier and avoiding plants they don't like. In this way, the power of a highly competitive plant could be nerfed because that plant is yummy and gets eaten more.
Grazing animals also don't graze uniformly over a whole pasture—they have areas they prefer to hang out and areas they hang out in less. This creates a broad range of specific levels of pressure that the plant communities face
Grazing animals chop and churn up soil with their hooves. They jostle seeds loose and bury them in mud. They compact some areas of soil but not uniformly.
Grazing animals poop. Ruminants like cattle, bison, goats, and deer use symbiotic bacteria that live in their guts to digest their food. The bacteria break down the plants into nutrients. When the animal defecates, it provides a feast of nutrients and moisture for plants and insects.
Finally, grazing animals are significantly slower and less violent than lawn mowers, and thus less likely to run over critters and shred them to bits.
I doubt it would be possible to comprehensively measure how many insects get shredded to bits by lawn mowers, or what impact this has on the overall population, but running a Creature-Shredding Machine regularly over your entire yard can't be good for them. You're chopping up a lot of caterpillars and other flightless larval forms of bugs, which birds need a LOT of in spring to feed to baby birds, among literally everything else.
Our turf grasses evolved to have large animals munching them down, which is why we have to cut them with machines. However, the machines fail entirely to fulfill their part of the symbiosis.
Most importantly, the machines spew shredded plant material all over the ground, where the mess dries out and essentially does nothing. Lawns are too short to hold in the ground's moisture, and perpetually sun-drenched because of the scalped plant cover. Ruminants chew their cud to help their bacteria break down the incredibly tough plant material into a form that releases the absorbable nutrients. Lawn mowers are not meticulous like that. The shreds take forever to be decomposed—assuming they are decomposed on-site at all instead of being blown or washed away.
The spewing of shredded plant gunk is something that certainly has unique impacts on the plant life. I have particularly noticed that grass clippings get stuck to leaves of nearby plants (often causing them to rot) or even pierce through leaves, injuring or killing the leaf. The death of a single leaf on a single plant is tiny, but tiny stresses like these can determine which plants are capable of thriving in an environment and which die out. A plant might happen to respond badly to frequent micro-injuries.
Here's an interesting fact: There is a highly endangered plant found in Kentucky called running buffalo-clover. Why do you think it is called that?
The running part means it forms long, vine-like stems that sprawl out and run along the ground, growing new roots along their length.
The buffalo part refers to the plant's association with bison. When bison trample on it, they chop the running stems with their sharp hooves. Since the stems are rooted into the ground, they can live on their own without being linked to the main plant, and in this way, the bison are chopping the plants up into more plants!
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a reading list on the human labor behind AI, machine learning, data labeling, and content moderation
bringing a global labor perspective to the “ai is gonna steal our jobs!” discourse that usamerican creative workers don't really like…
(based on this twitter thread)
Google’s AI Chatbot Is Trained by Humans Who Say They’re Overworked, Underpaid and Frustrated (12 July 2023)
“If you want to ask, what is the secret sauce of Bard and ChatGPT? It’s all of the internet. And it’s all of this labeled data that these labelers create,” said Laura Edelson, a computer scientist at New York University. “It’s worth remembering that these systems are not the work of magicians — they are the work of thousands of people and their low-paid labor.”
The Hidden Workforce That Helped Filter Violence and Abuse Out of ChatGPT (11 July 2023)
ChatGPT is one of the most successful tech products ever launched. And crucial to that success is a group of largely unknown data workers in Kenya. By reviewing disturbing, grotesque content, often for wages of just two to three dollars an hour, they helped make the viral chatbot safe. WSJ’s Karen Hao traveled to Kenya to meet those workers and hear about what the job cost them.
The workers at the frontlines of the AI revolution: The global labor force of outsourced and contract workers are early adopters of generative AI — and the most at risk (11 July 2023)
Since the blockbuster launch of ChatGPT at the end of 2022, future-of-work pontificators, AI ethicists, and Silicon Valley developers have been fiercely debating how generative AI will impact the way we work. Some six months later, one global labor force is at the frontline of the generative AI revolution: offshore outsourced workers.
Inside the AI Factory: the humans that make tech seem human (20 June 2023)
You might miss this if you believe AI is a brilliant, thinking machine. But if you pull back the curtain even a little, it looks more familiar, the latest iteration of a particularly Silicon Valley division of labor, in which the futuristic gleam of new technologies hides a sprawling manufacturing apparatus and the people who make it run.
OpenAI Used Kenyan Workers on Less Than $2 Per Hour to Make ChatGPT Less Toxic (18 January 2023)
OpenAI took a leaf out of the playbook of social media companies like Facebook, who had already shown it was possible to build AIs that could detect toxic language like hate speech to help remove it from their platforms. The premise was simple: feed an AI with labeled examples of violence, hate speech, and sexual abuse, and that tool could learn to detect those forms of toxicity in the wild. That detector would be built into ChatGPT to check whether it was echoing the toxicity of its training data, and filter it out before it ever reached the user. It could also help scrub toxic text from the training datasets of future AI models.
To get those labels, OpenAI sent tens of thousands of snippets of text to an outsourcing firm in Kenya, beginning in November 2021. Much of that text appeared to have been pulled from the darkest recesses of the internet. Some of it described situations in graphic detail like child sexual abuse, bestiality, murder, suicide, torture, self harm, and incest. … The data labelers employed by Sama on behalf of OpenAI were paid a take-home wage of between around $1.32 and $2 per hour…
The ‘Invisible’, Often Unhappy Workforce That’s Deciding the Future of AI (9 December 2023)
Among a range of conclusions, the Google study finds that the crowdworkers' own biases are likely to become embedded into the AI systems whose ground truths will be based on their responses; that widespread unfair work practices (including in the US) on crowdworking platforms are likely to degrade the quality of responses; and that the ‘consensus' system (effectively a ‘mini-election' for some piece of ground truth that will influence downstream AI systems) which currently resolves disputes can actually throw away the best and/or most informed responses.
The Exploited Labor Behind Artificial Intelligence: Supporting transnational worker organizing should be at the center of the fight for “ethical AI.” (13 October 2022)
So-called AI systems are fueled by millions of underpaid workers around the world, performing repetitive tasks under precarious labor conditions. And unlike the “AI researchers” paid six-figure salaries in Silicon Valley corporations, these exploited workers are often recruited out of impoverished populations and paid as little as $1.46/hour after tax. Yet despite this, labor exploitation is not central to the discourse surrounding the ethical development and deployment of AI systems.
A factory line of terrors: TikTok's African content moderators complain they were treated like robots, reviewing videos of suicide and animal cruelty for less than $3 an hour (1 August 2022)
"The devil of this job is that you get sick slowly — without even noticing it," said Wisam, a former content moderator who now trains others for Majorel. … While TikTok does use artificial intelligence to help review content, the technology is notoriously poor in non-English languages. For this reason, humans are still used to review most of the heinous videos on the platform.
Human Touch: Artificial intelligence may be making some jobs obsolete but it has given a new lease of life to one group of people who play an unglamorous but critical role in the machine learning pipeline: first generation women workers in Indian towns and villages (20 July 2022)
“Any major technology company in the last 10 years has been powered by a throng of people … At some level, there’s denial. Investors like to hear that technology sells itself once you write the code. But that’s not really true.” … “Data work has a racial and class dynamic. It is outsourced to developing countries while model work is done by engineers largely in developed nations … Without their labour, there would be no AI.”
Desperate Venezuelans are making money by training AI for self-driving cars (29 August 2022)
How the AI industry profits from catastrophe: As the demand for data labeling exploded, an economic catastrophe turned Venezuela into ground zero for a new model of labor exploitation (20 April 2022)
Most profit-maximizing algorithms, which underpin e-commerce sites, voice assistants, and self-driving cars, are based on deep learning, an AI technique that relies on scores of labeled examples to expand its capabilities. … The insatiable demand has created a need for a broad base of cheap labor to manually tag videos, sort photos, and transcribe audio. The market value of sourcing and coordinating that “ghost work” … is projected to reach $13.7 billion by 2030.
Over the last five years, crisis-ridden Venezuela has become a primary source of this labor. The country plunged into the worst peacetime economic catastrophe facing a country in nearly 50 years right as demand for data labeling was exploding. Droves of well-educated people who were connected to the internet began joining crowdworking platforms as a means of survival.
Facebook Faces New Lawsuit Alleging Human Trafficking and Union-Busting in Kenya (11 May 2022)
“We can’t have safe social media if the workers who protect us toil in a digital sweatshop… We’re hoping this case will send ripples across the continent—and the world. The Sama Nairobi office is Facebook’s moderation hub for much of East and South Africa. Reforming Facebook’s factory floor here won’t just affect these workers, but should improve the experience of Facebook users in Kenya, South Africa, Ethiopia, and other African countries.”
Inside Facebook's African Sweatshop (14 February 2022)
Here in Nairobi, Sama employees who speak at least 11 African languages between them toil day and night, working as outsourced Facebook content moderators: the emergency first responders of social media. They perform the brutal task of viewing and removing illegal or banned content from Facebook before it is seen by the average user. …
The testimonies of Sama employees reveal a workplace culture characterized by mental trauma, intimidation, and alleged suppression of the right to unionize. The revelations raise serious questions about whether Facebook… is exploiting the very people upon whom it is depending to ensure its platform is safe
Refugees help power machine learning advances at Microsoft, Facebook, and Amazon: Big tech relies on the victims of economic collapse (22 September 2021)
Microwork comes with no rights, security, or routine and pays a pittance — just enough to keep a person alive yet socially paralyzed. Stuck in camps, slums, or under colonial occupation, workers are compelled to work simply to subsist under conditions of bare life. This unequivocally racialized aspect to the programs follows the logic of the prison-industrial complex, whereby surplus — primarily black — populations [in the United States] are incarcerated and legally compelled as part of their sentence to labor for little to no payment. Similarly exploiting those confined to the economic shadows, microwork programs represent the creep of something like a refugee-industrial complex.
(an excerpt from the book Work Without the Worker: Labour in the Age of Platform Capitalism by Philip Jones)
AI needs to face up to its invisible-worker problem (11 December 2020)
A.I. Is Learning From Humans. Many Humans. (16 August 2019)
A.I. researchers hope they can build systems that can learn from smaller amounts of data. But for the foreseeable future, human labor is essential. “This is an expanding world, hidden beneath the technology,” said Mary Gray, an anthropologist at Microsoft and the co-author of the book “Ghost Work,” which explores the data labeling market. “It is hard to take humans out of the loop.”
[book] Behind the Screen: Content Moderation in the Shadows of Social Media by Sarah T. Roberts (June 2019)
Social media on the internet can be a nightmarish place. A primary shield against hateful language, violent videos, and online cruelty uploaded by users is not an algorithm. It is people. Mostly invisible by design, more than 100,000 commercial content moderators evaluate posts on mainstream social media platforms: enforcing internal policies, training artificial intelligence systems, and actively screening and removing offensive material—sometimes thousands of items per day
[book] Ghost Work: How to Stop Silicon Valley from Building a New Global Underclass by Mary L. Gray and Siddharth Suri (May 2019)
Hidden beneath the surface of the web, lost in our wrong-headed debates about AI, a new menace is looming. … services delivered by companies like Amazon, Google, Microsoft, and Uber can only function smoothly thanks to the judgment and experience of a vast, invisible human labor force. These people doing “ghost work” make the internet seem smart. They perform high-tech piecework: flagging X-rated content, proofreading, designing engine parts, and much more. An estimated 8 percent of Americans have worked at least once in this “ghost economy,” and that number is growing. They usually earn less than legal minimums for traditional work, they have no health benefits, and they can be fired at any time for any reason, or none.
[follow-up articles about the book here and here]
Inmates in Finland are training AI as part of prison labor (28 March 2019)
“Prison labor” is usually associated with physical work, but inmates at two prisons in Finland are doing a new type of labor: classifying data to train artificial intelligence algorithms for a startup. … “The hook is that we have this kind of hype circulating around AI so that we can masquerade really old forms of labor exploitation as ‘reforming prisons,’… They’re connecting social movements, reducing it to hype, and using that to sell AI.”
How Crowdworkers Became the Ghosts in the Digital Machine: Since 2005, Amazon has helped create one of the most exploited workforces no one has ever seen (5 February 2014)
Crowdworking is often hailed by its boosters as ushering in a new age of work. With the zeal of high-tech preachers, they cast it as a space in which individualism, choice and self-determination flourish. … But if you happen to be a low-end worker doing the Internet’s grunt work, a different vision arises. According to critics, Amazon’s Mechanical Turk may have created the most unregulated labor marketplace that has ever existed. Inside the machine, there is an overabundance of labor, extreme competition among workers, monotonous and repetitive work, exceedingly low pay and a great deal of scamming. In this virtual world, the disparities of power in employment relationships are magnified many times over, and the New Deal may as well have never happened.
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yeahivegotanaccount · 2 years
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Anyway, bone juice saves lifes. Keep your bones, bigger ones especially. Even if you roasted meat with a big bone in it it still hasn’t reached it full potential. Put that bad boy in freezer and cry out of happiness when you can make pasta ~soup edition~.
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onlyswan · 6 months
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summary: in which jungkook misses you before he even leaves.
idol!jungkook x reader / angst, fluff / word count: 3.7k
content/warnings: they both cry, they’re so in love and anxious of being apart 🥲 pls somebody give my babies a box of tissue damn it!!! / making out :") might be one of my favs i’ve written heh cherry koo ily
> in which masterlist!
note: hi hiii this serves as a prologue kinda to the giving up drabbles <3 and as to not confuse the timeline, this one takes place in sept 2018 and the first giving up drabble june 2019 ^^ hehe reblogs/feedback are appreciated + as always i’d love to chat abt ur thoughts 🥺
“i’ll call you when i arrive at the dorm, baby. let’s pack the rest of my things together, hmm?”
you hum softly in agreement, hiding your face on jungkook’s chest so he won’t see you yawn.
you’re so adorable, he thinks to himself with a grin.
matching his outfits with you in preparation for his travels has always been one of the little ways you spend quality time together. yes, you will be physically apart for most of this year and the next… but if he just pushes that fact in the back of his mind for an hour or two so he can make you laugh with his purposely horrendous choices, he thinks he may be able to leave with a lighter heart.
one last kiss is granted to your forehead, and you nuzzle your cheeks against his warm hands to cherish every ounce of his touch you can manage to steal.
you peek from the small space of the door to smile at your lover, which he then returns rife with fondness. you wave and bid your silly bye bye’s to each other, and it’s you who ultimately closes the door despite the voice in your head bewailing its protests.
it creates a clicking sound as you push it all the way, and after that, the defeaning silence fills your apartment like a toxic gas that makes it impossible to breathe. with no other soul left to witness it, your walls involuntarily come crumbling down. your eyes become blurry with unshed tears, and they fall one by one, some getting caught by your eyelashes. they hang heavy until they inevitably roll down your cheeks, as if they’re desperate not to crash and break, as if they’re horrified of their fate towards doom… much like you are.
recognizing the sensation of your weak knees threatening to give way, you lean your forehead on the hardwood to relieve some of the weight burdening your shoulders.
your chores have piled up while you were recklessly spending every second you had left with your boyfriend. you have better things to do than to cry. however, you can’t control your face that contorts to express the pain of having your heart mercilessly squeezed in your chest, tighter and tighter as the distance between you and jungkook grows, and it will only continue to do so.
you wind up as a heap on the floor, an intricate collection of love yet to be given and shards of memories calamitous and beautiful, knees hugged to your chest as you weep.
you swore you wouldn’t do this. you fucking swore you wouldn’t do this to yourself.
since losing your family, you’ve been alone, trying to survive in this world like a leaf in the eye of a storm, carried by a raging river that travels to an unknown sea. you then promised that no matter how much you affection you’ve grown to have for someone, if there comes a time that they make you feel lonely (skin-on-skin or heart-to-heart), you will be the one to walk away first. even if it hurts, even if it leaves you empty inside. for one, you’ve never liked wasting your time. you know what you want and what you need— someone who will stay within reach. your day-to-day life is far too draining for you to find the energy to beg for love and attention… and for the love of god, there’s already too many people you wish were still by your side.
your friends have witnessed you annihilate hearts and egos, leaving behind a string of jaded lovers.
but jungkook, with his bunny-like smile and endless gestures of kindness… has somehow slithered his way into a space in your heart where no one has ever been.
the apartment feels too empty with him not around. he’s not knocking rhythmically at your door from the inside to announce his arrival. he’s not in the kitchen humming songs while chopping vegetables. he’s not in the shower yelling at you because you forgot that turning on the sink makes his water cold. he’s not in the living room watching a movie on your laptop. he’s not snuggled closely with you and snoring execessively by your ear.
it’s going to be like this for a while. it’s always going to be like this, you realize.
you’re so fucking lonely.
you’ve only gotten used to him being here, and now you need to re-learn what it’s like to be without him.
you’re forced to gasp for air as you sob uncontrollably, interrupted by occasional hiccups that make your body jolt. you taste the salt in your tears as they seep into the crevice between your lips, can feel them beginning to poison your skin.
you let jungkook come too close. he slept on your bed and he learned that you’re always cold. he enveloped you in the safety of his warm embrace and you couldn’t will yourself to leave after the first time. you’ve surrendered to him the control over your body, and also your heart, which you may be breaking alongside your rule but… walking away would mean forsaking yourself.
for the first time, you are crying not because of the absence of love, but the abundance of it. humans are essentially a collection of dead stars that are brought back to life when they are consumed by the electric ache of love and yearning. you are addicted to the antidote that is the touch of another body that burns the same.
you’re free falling.
if you were to choose the cause of your madness, you would choose this.
because for the first time, you are not cursing a name, but the universe and its twisted ways. in your one-bedroom apartment, you don’t feel small; your arrogance is as big as the sun that threatens to swallow the earth whole. the empty space on your bed is now in the shape of the man who loves you.
the back of your head hits the door, and you sigh at the new predicament that presents itself to you: the fluorescent lightbulb at your doorway is flickering as if to signal its impending death.
your bad vision begs you to look away.
it’s too high. it’s too high for you to reach. jungkook isn’t here anymore.
you bury your face in your hands, another wave of tears spilling over before you could get a hold of yourself. your cries are unapologetic; you sound like a little child who got their hair pulled at the playground.
you would much rather wait for him than find a solution. you want to bear the weight of him in every possible way there is. you want to have him in mind every time you flip the light switch, because you always seem to forget that it’s dying after a long day at school.
but for now, all you can do is sit on the floor and smell his perfume on your clothes as you wait for his call.
jungkook is still frozen on the driver’s seat, struck with a suspicion that he left something behind in your apartment, but he can’t figure out what else there is besides his heart in the palm of your hands.
he opens up every single compartment of his backpack, but he soon carelessly discards it at the backseat because he has no idea what it is he’s even looking for.
“what is it? what is it? what is it?” he mutters absentmindedly to himself, wide doe eyes still actively darting around the car as he mulls over what could possibly be missing. “am i an idiot? am i just making things up in my head?”
but he is leaving for tour after all, it would be a big headache if he forgets to bring something important.
something important such as…
proceeding with a final inspection, he starts patting around his body, from his chest down to the pockets of his sweatpants.
“ahhh-” he makes a noise of enlightenment when he discovers one of them to be completely empty.
it then becomes vivid in his mind— the memory of him lazily setting down his wallet on your study table before he crawled on your single-sized bed as if it’s his own.
“…shit. i need to go back.”
he has a smirk plastered on his face as he jogs his way up to your apartment floor. radiating with pure excitement unbeknownst to himself, he even begins to skip a step with every long stride he makes across the staircase.
thanks to his forgetfulness, he found an excuse to be with you for a few minutes more.
the fourth door straight ahead, he still remembers chanting in his head the first time he visited your building on his own.
he stands before it with the intention to surprise you, but ironically, he is the one who ends up freezing in place. your muffled sobs escape through the narrow cracks of the door, and his hand slowly slips away from the handle until it drops back to his side. his vision becomes unfocused, mind going blank, only registering the shortness of his breath and the powerful punch to his gut.
that sweet, heart-fluttering smile that comforted him must’ve killed you inside.
“i won’t forget to call after every show.”
“that does sound nice but…” you scrunch your nose cutely. “i won’t be upset, if that’s what you’re worried about. go straight to sleep when you’re exhausted. i know you won’t have much time to rest.”
“please! you can watch me sleep too.” he pouts. “you know i always make it work. while i eat, while i shower! that won’t change. i need to see you and gain strength… or else i seriously think i won’t survive this one.”
and jungkook hopes that he’s not too much of a burden for loving you.
although, you did tell him once in passing— that anyone can be passionate, but not everyone will bravely go on stage every night to showcase those passions, even if it means testing the very limits of the human body.
“i can’t allow that to happen, can i?” you click your tongue, copying the angry frown of your boyfriend, who you find so, so, so cool.
his features soften after you pinch his soft cheek.
“your hyungs might kill me if i make their little one mope around missing me too much.”
“w-what do you mean?” he becomes flushed with embarrassment. “what kind of things do they tell you?!”
“nothing much.” your eyes shine with a glint of faux innocence. “when we were trainees, jungkook did this… since meeting you, he’s gotten more stubborn… can you tell him to wake up earlier if he plans on showering for an hour? you know, just things like that.”
“aish! jimin-hyung!” he releases a deep sigh to express his exasperation, knitted forehead not doing much to diminish the roundness of his eyes. “i bet one of them is jimin-hyung! i’m right, aren’t i? you- you’re getting too close with him! i can’t allow this- really, i- ah! no! no!”
the burst of laughter that fills the room only confirms his suspicion. you roll over on the bed to cover your face, half of your body collapsing on top of his, and you clutch your aching belly when he begins to aggressively shake you in a joking manner.
“listen, you can’t become best friends! you hear me? don’t! my secrets… what’s going to happen to them? who else can i tell them to?!”
immediately recognizing his poor choice of words once they have left his mouth, jungkook purses his lips in regret, and it’s his turn to feel his lungs burn from the lack of oxygen.
“oh, really?” you slowly sit up as you stare at him with raised eyebrows. “and what kind of secrets do you need to keep from me? huh?”
he doesn’t waste a second to reply, scrambling as to not leave any space for you to formulate more doubts in your head.
“nothing! nothing, baby!” he flashes a dreamy smile in return to your sharp glare. he gently cups the back of your head to pull you back closer, puckering his lips as he tries to meet you halfway. “come here- give me a kiss.”
you ignore his advances, moving away from him with a scoff you don’t even bother to hide. the annoyance bubbling up inside of you feels irrational, and yet you can’t stop it from controlling your body language.
his jaw slacks in disappointment. he despises being denied affection, more importantly, a kiss meant to be shared with you.
“are you mad?”
you turn your back against him, scooting closer to the edge of the bed, but jungkook doesn’t waste time in chasing after you.
“baby!” he whines, seizing your arm and tightly embracing you from the side before you can escape. “i was just joking- i promise- i swear. you’re even the first person i share my secrets with nowadays!”
you sigh in defeat, eyes fluttering shut as you allow him to caress your face and pepper your cheek with loving kisses. loud, and slightly wet, which you used to not be fond of when it came to the lovers you had before, but as for jungkook and his dewy lips, you weirdly don’t seem to mind.
“please don’t be mad.” he coos lightheartedly before ducking his head to press his lips against yours. “i don’t want us to fight before i go.”
“i’m not mad.” your reply is quiet, and it drips with hesitance. “i just don’t want to think about you having secrets while you’re away.”
you turn to communicate directly with his eyes. if you feel sick to your stomach imagining him as a person you’d never have the grace to forgive, you don’t show it.
“you understand where i’m coming from, right?”
he meekly nods.
this is another reason why he is eager to spend all his free time with you, albeit through a screen smaller than the palm of his hand, and perhaps buy you trinkets from every city that welcomes him because everything reminds him of you. he wants to give you the reassurance that he doesn’t have any plans on doing something that may hurt you. this will be excruciating, he knows, but it is also a chance to prove himself as a boyfriend worthy of your tears and sacrifices. this can’t end before it begins. he doesn’t think he’d be able to bear that. he just celebrated his first birthday with you. it hasn’t been long since you uttered the three words he’s been anxiously waiting to hear.
“i love you. please give me your trust for now… i won’t waste it. you’ll see, at the end of this, we’ll be stronger. i promise i won’t forget my responsibilities as your partner even if we’re physically apart.”
he tenderly strokes your hair, eyes filled with galaxies memorizing every inch of your face. he’s scared, too. he’s scared that he’s overestimating himself. too ambitious, too greedy for wanting both the world and the most beautiful person he has ever seen in it to love him. he’s scared of getting too exhausted. he’s scared that you won’t be there anymore when he opens his eyes.
“i will probably mope around, though, missing you too much…” he pauses, then he makes up his mind.
him getting more stubborn since he met you— it might just have some truth to it that he’s too sheepish to say out loud, especially if his members were around to hear it.
“yes, i will seriously be a handful.” he nods to himself. “so i’m already apologizing early.”
“what are those responsibilities exactly?”
“to show you that i love you!” he exclaims in a tone that screams obviously. “to make you happy, to keep you safe… to stay committed to you- yah, you already know these things!”
but still, it’s nice to hear him say it. this bed of roses is a bed of thorns; he has chosen to sleep on it with you.
you giggle heartily at the sight of his face getting flushed. “you’ve been doing a great job then, baby.”
the praise causes his doe eyes to sparkle with glee. “really?”
“really!” his heart skips a beat when you softly cup his face in your hands, wearing that kind smile he can’t help but fall in love with over and over again. “don’t worry, i won’t let you miss me too much. i have my share of the responsibilities too.”
he swallows the lump in his throat, shakily sitting on the floor with his back against the door. he doesn’t know how long he stays there. he only knows that it’s near sunrise because the lights across the hallways have gone out one by one.
with an elbow resting on top of his knee, he fiddles with the laces of his shoe with no rhythm or rhyme— silently crying with you, clueless as to what he should do. he didn’t learn about this in school, nor during dance practices. no one teaches you what to do when you hurt a person you love but there’s no fault to fix and apologize for.
every now and then, a tenant passes by, and he is overwhelmed with the urge to scream at them to fuck off and mind their own business.
adding to his frustration is his phone, which has been vibrating with calls and text messages. he only spares them a dismissive glance before clicking the off button. yes, he fucking knows it’s already 5am. yes, he’s still with his baby. however, he is forced to send a reply to his manager when asked if they could finish packing his luggages for him to save time. no. no, no, no.
on the other side of the door, the pitter-patter of mechanical rain tickles your ears. your nimble fingers doesn’t cease on tapping on the keyboard even as your eyes stray to the contact name above the conversation, just to make sure that it’s your boyfriend you’re texting.
to: my jungkook
babyyy the sun is about to rise
so i’m not sleepy anymore :(
you're not home yet?
wait. if you're still driving just reply later
be a good driver before a good bf for now ☺️
ohoh i don’t mind if you don't have time to call anymore. just text me rq before you take off pleaseee so i know you're safe and sound
and after the flight ofc!! 😭
i love you! ❤️
seconds later, a pounding at the door makes your body jolt in shock. you carelessly rush to stand up, the safety measure of looking through the peephole not even crossing your mind before you swing it open.
jungkook stuns you with his presence, chest heaving with every breath as he studies you in a fog of haze. your messy hair perfectly frames your pretty face. your parted lips are raw from the crime of your sharp teeth forcibly putting an end to your crying. your eyes are still damp with tears, and they shine every time the warm light hanging above your head flickers.
if you could only read his mind, you won’t have to worry about him wanting anybody else.
once again, he finds himself helplessly infatuated. why do you have to look utterly bewitching even when you cry? fuck, and your texts… how did he get so lucky? you fuel something carnal inside of him that he has difficulty putting into words.
and so, he allows his actions to speak for himself.
“jungk-” his name is interrupted with a high-pitched whimper caught in your throat. your trembling hands desperately grasp the sides of his hoodie as you stumble backwards, struggling to recriprocate the unrestrained fervour of his kisses.
he’s out of control. he has never kissed you like this before. you don’t know if he doesn’t feel your weak fists punching his chest or he just doesn’t care. you feel dizzy… dizzy, dizzy, dizzy.
you’re confused why he’s still standing at your doorway. you’re terrified of losing your balance. you’re crushing a pair of sneakers underneath the soles of your feet and it hurts. but his fingers are tightly tangled with your hair, the others playing a saccharine hymn along the keys of your spine, and for the pleasure he gives, you can endure to live with the pain.
the familiar taste of mint on his tongue is far too addictive for you not to indulge. you can’t stop craving for more of it, more of him, and you let your lungs burn.
but soon it mixes with the salt in his tears as his emotions crash on the shore like a tsunami. the seal of your lips is broken by a quiet sob, and in shame, he ends the kiss to bury his face in the crook of your neck.
“____, what do i do? i don’t want to leave.”
your heart shatters into pieces as he sniffles, voice cracking as he musters up the courage to confess to you in between.
“jungkook…”
the words of sincerity feel heavy on his tongue. he’s never been good at this; always relied on his ability to feel. in spite of that, he wants to bare all of himself to you, and he prays that you believe him when he says- “i can’t imagine my life without you anymore.”
“so don’t. you don’t have to think about things like that.” you sigh as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, subtly swaying your bodies to soothe him. “come on, love. why are you crying…? you know where to find me, don’t you?”
you feel him nod before he mumbles pensively. “here… or school, or the restobar.”
“that’s right.” you chuckle. “just don’t lose your key. i’m not going anywhere.”
but he fears it’s his goddamn mind he might just lose. he squeezes his eyes shut, embracing you tighter as he counts the seconds in his head. he will let go after thirty, then perhaps he will stay for another ten.
in another lifetime, jungkook wishes that he could tell you the same.
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hellisharchive · 2 months
Text
The Original Dick
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⬎
▬ Adam was not who you expected him to be as the first man, you expected someone prim and perfect and can do no wrong. He was far from that, and quite frankly kind of an asshole. You hated him- so why did you agree to a one night stand?
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C/TW! ▬ 18+ MINORS DNI, smut, afab gn reader [no pronouns or gender are mentioned], virgin reader, fingering, oral (reader receiving), pnv, Adam calls reader "Babe", "Baby, and "Bitch", not beta read NOTES! ▬ Ngl I was struggling with the smut so sorry if the quality is kinda shit and overall kinda wonky- still hope you enjoy though! First time I actually wrote and finished a fic for hellaverse too.
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You arrived in Heaven a few days ago and it was amazing. Everything was perfect, no crime, no abuse, everything was bliss. The strictness of rules didn't get past your radar though, makes sense though, Heaven was no place for terrible people. What you didn't understand though, is how much of an asshole Adam was. He was the very first human ever created and ascended to heaven, so why was he allowed to swear and talk sexually like there was no tomorrow? He seemed to be the only one allowed to do so, anyone else was quieted or given consequences. Maybe because of him being the first human gave him the right? You didn't know, but didn't care.
You never personally talked to him, preferring to stay as far away from him as possible just so he never would start up a conversation with you. Besides, he was always with Lute, those two were inseparable. Honestly, you thought they were together. You asked a few others who knew him and they all said that those two were a friends-with-benefits situation- at least from what they assumed. You don't know why you cared so much, he was such a rude guy, you hated him.
So why was he walking directly towards you on the Promenade while you were chatting with your new friend? About him nonetheless. Did you somehow summon him from that? You didn't even realize until they told you and pointed behind you. Your eyes went wide as they asked why he was coming over and you answered honestly. You didn't know why. He had a smug look on his face as he approached you, only then did you realize that Lute wasn't around. Wait, where was she? What's going on? Were you in trouble?
"Heya newbie, heard ya asking about me and Lute, really if ya wanted to fuck me could have just asked, Baby" Now panicking, your face burned as you waved your hands, denying that you ever asked about him. Why would you want to ever have sex with him? He's such an asshole. Wait, how did he know? Damn, those bastards must have told him. Even in heaven you can't trust anyone without it coming back to bite you in the ass
"No I didnt! And I certainly do not want to do that with you no way!" You were so flustered, why so flustered? Anyone hitting on you that you didn't find attractive made you feel disgusting, never flustered and warm. God- were you really finding the idea of fucking Adam hot? No, you were just a virgin who never got laid when they were alive so this is just too much, yeah that must be it. The angel just chuckled and smirked, he was such a bitch.
"Mhm sure Babe, why so flustered huh? C'mon admit it, you want a piece of THE Adam, THE first man, THE original dick. I see you avoiding me, don't think I don't. I know it's because I get ya worked up, don't I?" He suddenly leaned directly in front of your face, only being a few inches away. The close distance made you look over at your new friend, they just looked awkwardly and shrugged, not knowing how to help. Gulping, you turned back to him and took a deep breath.
"As if, in your dreams" You rolled your eyes and started to move away, feigning confidence, as on the inside you were shaking like a leaf. Before you could get far though, he wrapped his hand around your arm and pulled you back up to him, putting his free hand on your other arm. He held you close, so close you two were mixing open mouth breaths.
"Let me show you a good time Babe, you're a hot piece of ass I don't wanna pass up. And don't think I haven't noticed you staring at me too, you were practically eye fucking me!" Oh god, he really did notice every single thing about you? You thought he wasn't even paying attention to you as you stared at him, ok admittedly maybe you stared at him too much, but you hated him. Taking another gulp, you considered his offer. The fact that you were considering his offer at all concerned you, but maybe you should let go a little, get laid, you could say you fucked the first ever man in existence at least. Hyping yourself up, you said yes.
"Fine. BUT, only for one night. This will not become a normal thing! That is- if you're even good" The way his eyes lit up as he laughed from glee, screaming "yes" as he pumped a fist. He was such a child, you thought.
"You are going to have the BEST night of your life Toots, trust me. You will LOOOVE it, you'll be begging for me to fuck you every-" he leaned closer "single" and closer "night" and he leaned up and whispered in your ear, causing a shiver to run down your spine. Fuck- did that really arouse you? He didn't even do anything besides insist he was a good fuck and say you were hot unprompted. You hated him, he should not be making you feel this way. Pushing him away slightly, he "whooped" again and flew up in excitement, reminding you why you hated him. He acted like such a child, it was annoying. Coming back down, he smirked and got closer to you get again. He has no sense of personal boundaries, does he?
"You won't regret it Babes. My place. Tonight at dawn. Don't be late" Winking, he started to walk away when you realized you had no idea where his place was.
"Wait uh...where do you live?" You hated asking, hating you agreed to this ridiculous bet. He explained where it was and said he would have Lute bring you over. You make sure to say no at least ten times as that would be incredibly awkward. Sure, they fuck casually and aren't in a relationship, but its still not something you want to get directly involved with Lute for. But, he left and said to wait right here for her, leaving you alone with your new friend.
"Dude! You got a date with Adam!" They smiled and nudged your shoulder, ignoring the fact that you were processing the entire interaction and that it was happening tonight. Wait, what should you wear? No- this wasn't a date, it was just a hook up, that's all. Shaking your head, you looked back at them trying to calm down.
"Ok first of all, it isn't a date. It's just a one-night stand. There will be no other associations with him past tonight, ok? Besides, he's been...with Lute anyways so" Shrugging, you slowly start to calm your nerves or at least act like everything is fine.
"Wait...you're jealous, aren't you?" They excitedly exclaimed, causing you to grab onto their shoulders and shush them. You? Jealous? As if! This was just a quick fuck- you hated his guts, but couldn't resist knowing what sex with him was actually like.
"No, I am absolutely not. You know how much I hate him" You made sure to express your hatred every time you saw him, because you wanted them to know.
"Yeah, you've only been here for four days yet you don't shut up about him" They smirked, which caused your face to get hot again. Ok...maybe they did have a point. But it was all in hatred, not in thinking he's attractive in any way. Before you could argue this though, they seemingly read your mind.
"And no, if you think because you complain about him, it's denial" That was practically a slap in your face as you mulled over your time here since the first day. Could it really just be denial? But he was a huge asshole and very "college frat boy" to you. Did you really find him attractive and just didn't want to admit it?
"No it is not denial- I really do hate him. This is just to make him go away permanently" You convinced yourself, at least in the eyes of your friend, that there is no shred of attraction for Adam. How could there be? Any normal response to something like that would be to be flustered after all, taking about being fucked. But then again, it was unwarranted, so why did you kind of enjoy it? No- you're just being stupid. Did you already forget that you were in Heaven? This stuff would most likely cast you out of for this- but if Adam can act like this, why can't you?
"Ok then, fine, be in denial. But tell me, are you going to abandon this opportunity to get with the very first man ever created?" Sighing, you said no and told them you had to prepare for tonight as dawn was only come in a few hours and you had to mentally psych yourself up for it. They rolled their eyes playfully and said they'd meet up with you tomorrow so you can tell them everything. Heading to your new home, you mentally prepared yourself for this very unexpected night and trying not to worry about your friend calling it a "date".
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It was dawn and your nerves were through the roof. Walking out to the Promenade again, a few were still out and about, but you stood in the exact same place he approched you earlier. Nervously twiddling your thumbs, you realized that there shouldn't be nervous or anxious- this was Heaven, everything was perfect and worry free. Was Adam already affecting you this badly? You didn't know how long it was until the familiar view of Lute walking down with an expression you couldn't decipher.
"Come with me" She spoke monotone, face unreadable, was she upset? I mean- it's not like they're actually a couple, unless she has some unrequited feelings? You were nervous as she weaved you through the various streets- some familiar and some not- and only then you realized that she was taking you to the center of Heaven. It didn't shock you- Adam was the first man in existence after all and the first human soul in Heaven. It made you nervous though, as you've never been there before. The only other beings that lived there was mainly Heavenborn. Nothing was spoken between you two until she pulled you close when you were in the hallway, a few feet away from the door.
"If you even THINK about hurting him- I will find you and cast you out of Heaven myself. Got it?" All you could do was nod as she shoved you to the door and then walked away. Taking a deep breath in, you exhaled slowly and knocked before you could walk away. A few seconds passed before the door was practically thrown open with a very excited Adam smiling at you.
"Fucking finally Babe! Took ya long enough. Let's get to fucking now" You gasped as he wasted no time and rushed you to his bedroom. Throwing you on his bed, he ripped off his mask and before you can process what his real face looked like- smashed his lips against yours, pinning you to the mattress with one hand- capturing you with your hands above your head- and the other at your sides. You didn't kiss back at first because it was so sudden, but then you started to kiss back. His huge garbs only pinned you down further as he started running his hands underneath your shirt. You lost track of time so you didn't know how long it was before he pulled back, panting heavily, you look at him as he stared at you with a hungry expression. He licked his lips as he looked at you like you were his prey, and he was the predator. Only then, you finally managed to see his face. He had short, brown hair, a stubble, and gold eyes. He was attractive even under the mask.
"Take..." You spoke quietly, not used to being the assertive one and too nervous to take action. Looking to the side you still felt unsure about all of this, I mean, you barely had action down on Earth. And this was Adam, first man, one of the head Angels, and he was just violently making out with you. You then felt his hand pry away from your chest and he grabbed your chin and lifted up your head to meet his.
"Take what, Bitch? You gotta tell me what you want" He smirked with a smug face as your face grew hot, you really did not want to say it. But...fuck it, right? This night was only for one night, might as well make it count.
"Take off your clothes" The burst of confidence was a surprise to you, but it pleased Adam very much as he kissed you again, but this time, it was a little softer than before.
"There it is, that's what I like to hear from Bitches I'm fucking" In no time, he stripped himself down to just his underwear- maybe to not fully overwhelm you at once? Your heart beat faster as you stared at his very hard dick covered by cloth, shit, this was really happening.
"Now let me take off your clothes, shits been annoying me for AGES. Your body is too hot to cover up" Only then what he was saying hit you like a train- did he really find you attractive even before? This entire time? He was just the one who wanted to let you make a move first? You let Adam fully undress you like he did you until you were just in your underwear. Gulping, you looked up as he pulled you into a sitting postion and crawled on top of your lap, running his hands up your arms as he started to kiss your neck. You could already feel yourself starting to get worked up- you tried to hold it in but a small moan escaped your mouth. Then, his hands drifted downwards- down to your underwear. He slips it under, lightly touching your clit, which caused you to jump from the sudden feeling.
"Damn Bitch, I barely fucking did anything and you're already fucking SOAKED. I'm gonna have a fun time with you tonight oh my fucking god" He laughed at the end as he started to gently prod your entrance and you shook in anticipation. Before you knew it- he pushed his finger in little by little, causing you to squirm from the intrusion. Whining, you felt it thrust in and out as the first man started to kiss and lap at your neck. He then added a second, causing you to moan and grab onto his back.
"You're definitely a fucking virgin aren't you? HA, don't think I can't tell Baby, I've fucked many before you and can tell when someone has or hasn't got a good dicking" His words cut though like a knife- of course he could tell, of course he's fucked countless of other people with how he behaves. You aren't special and will never be. That thought ended up being forgotten though, as he pulled out his now wet fingers covered in your juices, the feeling of being empty caused you to squirm again. He held up his slick appendages with his classic smug look before shoving them in his mouth. Making sure to lick them clean, he took them out of his mouth with a 'pop!'.
"Fucking delicious. Fuck I gotta taste the real thing" Adam got off of you and pulled up to the end of the bed, getting on his knees, he got closer to your crotch and you helped him take off your underwear. Feeling the air hit your pussy made you nervous as you were now almost fully naked for him and he was about to eat you out. Leaning back, you weren't ready as he dove in without wasting any time, you could feel his tounge enter you as he sucked on your clit. Moaning, you shook as he ate you out like he hasn't had anything to eat in a month. It felt so good, feeling his tongue wiggle inside you as he nipped on your clit, fuck.
"Adaaaaam..." You whined, now squirming, you felt the familiar pool of heat in your stomach as he sudeenlt latched onto your thighs, and he held them tight. Leaving your pussy, you watched as his face was covered in the slick juices as he stared at you with a slightly annoying expression.
"Stay still Bitch, kinda hard to eat you out when you're moving around" You just nodded in a slightly dazed state, not wanting to feel put off by his attitude. But, he went back down for seconds and you tried to stay still, even if it was incredibly hard. Everytime you made a sudden jerk, he gripped your thighs tighter. You couldn't resist as you couldn't grip the bedding very well, you rushed up to his hair and yanked on it, holding it so tightly. He moaned- you made him moan! He must have liked it, you had no time to think about it though as he just went deeper into you, causing you to moan his name again. After a few minutes, the feelings of arousal kept growing and the feelings in your stomach was too much to bare. You moaned out his name as you orgasmed, shaking as he wiped his face and licked up his mess. Standing up, he smirked as he pushed you down on the mattress again, caging you in. You just stared at him with wide eyes as you caught your breath.
"Damn, I knew you were a virgin but this is almost pathetic! Ha! Don't worry Bitch, it's time for you to be skewered by the original dick" Yanking off his underwear now, you couldn't see his dick very well, but you knew it couldn't have been small. Sliding you back so he had more room, he lifted up one of your legs and used his other hand to guide his cock to your entrance. Biting your lip, you stared up at him, still nervous that this was the one who took your virginity- in Heaven nonetheless. When he had the tip ready to plunge in, he looked up at you with a smirk, however, it quickly softened up even if just a little. Rubbing his hand on your leg, he wanted to make you feel...safe?
"Hey, if you're not up for it you don't gotta bang me yet Bitch. You can still back out now- even if you did scream my name like...twenty times" He must have seen your face and mistook it for being scared, which in all honesty you were, but that didn't mean you didn't want it. Reaching up to hold his face, you gave him the most genuine smile you could manage.
"No, no, I do want this I just...it's my first time, ya know?" He was the biggest manwhore around, he probably fucked thousands upon thousands of people in the past, he definitely fucked virgins before. Why did you even care? Why would HE care if you were nervous?
"Yeah, I get it Baby. I may have the best fucking dick in all existence, but I'm not into forcing others if they don't want it because that shit? Isn't cool. Unless they want to be forced- then that's hot as fuck. So, I am going to ask you" He leaned closer and his mouth was right next to your ear. "Do you want to be fucked into oblivion by the original dick? I need a yes or no Babe" His reassurance made you calm down as he could have just not cared like a lot of guys on Earth would. However, he made you shiver with his whispering and you nodded your head in agreement. He raised an eyebrow before you quickly sputtered out a "yes" and he smirked.
"Get ready for the BEST fucking night of your life. And welcome to Heaven, Bitch" The feeling of his dick entering your vagina was uncomfortable but not painful, he was being careful. Your breathing got heavier as he pushed in further, the feeling of being full wasn't unfamiliar as you fucked with toys as a human, but he was bigger than any dildo or vibrator you used. Whining the entire time as he slowly made you get used to him into you, you squirmed and grabbed his hair again and tugged. He moaned and growled and fuck it was hot.
"Fuck, keep doing that Babe and I'll fuck you so hard you'll have to stay in bed this entire week" He then bottomed out, fully pushing inside you until he couldn't no more. You screamed and your eyes started to water. Whining, you stared at the first man as he leaned down and gave you another passionate kiss as he started to thrust in and out. Moaning loudly, the sensations of his cock being dragged back and forth inside you was just too much- he was slow to help you ease into it. You tugged on his hair again and closed your eyes which made him push harder into you.
"Fuck!" Adam increased the pace and you felt the feelings of an orgasm creep up again the longer and harder he fucked you. You then felt his lips on yours as he kissed you again and you kissed back. It was too much- you broke away and screamed his name as you shook even more than the first time. You felt his cum leak into you as you spaced out, breathing heavily falling back on the bed. You stared up at the ceiling as you felt his cock exit you, causing you to cletch your now-empty vagina at the feeling. You couldn't even think right now- all you knew was that he was the real deal.
"Told you you'd have the best fucking night of your life Baby" You couldn't even respond as you were truly that far gone. You heard him laugh awkwardly and swear as he said he would be right back and you were too fucked out to care or fully process what that meant. Sometime later he came back, gently lifting you up into a sitting postion, he pressed a warm and wet rag to your nether regions and started to clean you up. His hesitance and awkward strokes makes it obvious he never did much aftercare, so why was he doing for you?
"I really fucked your brains out, huh? Well...stay the night with me, ok?" You looked at him with a shocked expression, who wouldn't? Half the time he spoke about the person he fucked like it was another casual day, he doesn't have time for his fuck to stay over and him and Lute are just sex with no intimate feelings attached.
"You haven't said a fucking word in what? Ten minutes? Just stay with me because I don't even think you can fucking walk right now, it's nothing special. I was right and you were wrong. Now get in bed Bitch, I'll wake you up tomorrow morning" You had no room to argue, still mentally out of it- you crawl back and into the covers. You were having trouble because your body was throughly fucked, so luckily Adam swooped in and helped you get comfortable. Laying on your side with a pillow between your legs, you were too tired to fully process that he wrapped around you and was swooning you.
"Goodnight Baby, see you tomorrow morning" You didn't register the small kiss he gave to the crown of your head as you fell asleep and had the best sleep of your life.
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ohdeersthings · 1 year
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Ao'nung x F!Deaf!Metkayina!Reader
Summary: Ao'nung has loved you since childhood.
Warning: Fluff, Ao'nung is a jerk to everyone but reader, some angst (I love emotional revelation of feelings), characters are aged up 18+ but no warnings here! Ronal ships reader and Ao'nung,
Note: was a request from @keyratch hope you enjoy it!
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~.~
Growing up, you always knew you were different. You couldn't hear the ocean waves, couldn't listen to the music of your clan for celebrations. You couldn't even harmonize with your mother as she sings to lull you to sleep.
Being born deaf, your parents tried so hard to pray to Eywa for a sign. The Tsahìk, Ronal, tried every herb and technique she knew, but nothing could change who you were.
What Eywa had decided for you to be.
You never blamed Eywa though, for the Great Mother had blessed you to feel a connection to her. You could feel her in the sand; the warmth of the sun that she blessed you with, the coolness of the ocean as you swam to admire the creatures she's created.
Even as a small child you had been drawn to the beauty of the Pandora.
The smallest sea shells you would collect and braid into your hair, stringing some together to make a necklace, bracelet, or head peice. The brightest floral you would gather to present to friends and family, just because the beauty of them made you think of others.
Ao'nung had only been eight when he met you for the first time. While training with his father on spear throwing he had caught sight of you collecting sea shells.
He was so distracted by you, he grabbed the spear wrong and cut his finger. Letting out a small hiss of pain, he instantly sucked on it, causing his father to gaze at him and then at you. Tonowari couldn't help but chuckle, "I see the silent beauty has caught your eye," Ao'nung was confused by his father's words, but quickly denied having even spotted you.
"Well that's too bad, because here she comes right now," sure enough you had seen the leader with his son, Ao'nung and had started over in their direction when you saw the big was hurt.
Ao'nung could only feel himself freeze as you closed the distance fast, suddenly reaching out to grab his hand as he tried to back away,
"H-hey! What are you doing?!" Ao'nung flinched as you pressed on his finger, the one he'd cut being too caught up looking at you. You never said anything, just brought out a healing leaf from your hip pouch and wrapped his finger quickly and efficiently.
"Thank you," he mumbled, you smiled and let go of his hand, signing to him, 'Would you like to play after training?' It had puzzled him why you didn't just ask out loud, but after looking to his father for assurance, he nodded to you causing you to smile and nod, turning back the way you'd come and headed away.
"Father, why didn't she just ask me?" Ao'nung questioned, looking up at Tomowari who smiled sadly at him, "she is deaf my son, she cannot speak for she never learned how, she cannot hear you," Ao'nung didn't feel any different towards you, maybe more curious, but he never felt like you were weird.
~.~
After that day many years ago, Ao'nung had grown, and so did his love for you. What started out as amazement and adoration as children, had since grown into feeling as if you were the only one for him.
The way you helped his sister with day to day chores, such grace and beauty weaving baskets and collecting herbs for his mother. The complete definition of selfless as you taught the children of the clan their sign, who else but you with your patience and grace.
The tingles you left on his body when you would tap his hand, shoulder, arm, anything to get his attention. You left him yearning for your attention day and night. Left him in agonizing pain at the thought of having you with him under the stars but couldn't.
Yourself however, would be a prize to any fine young Na'vi, but to your own self image you were at the bottom of the food chain. Your biggest insecurity being your deafness. You would never hear your mates words of love and comfort, would never hear the giggles of your own future children should Great Mother bless you with any.
You never had anyone express interest in you, although Ao'nung made sure of that, not that you knew. He always glared, growled or warned any man who looked in your direction. He made sure to linger a hand on your waist while talking, a smug look over his shoulder at the hunters who had tried to talk to you, a smirk at the Ilu keepers who tried to get to close.
When the Sullys had arrived, you had been busy helping Ronal with her duties as she was trusting you to take over while she got ready to give birth.
You didn't get to see Tsireya and Ao'nung as often as they were busy with teaching the new comers the traditions and expectations of the clan.
'(Y/N) go fetch Ao'nung, he should be down on the beach,' Ronal requested, you nodded, standing from your sitting position and heading out of the Marui, starting your trek to the beach.
You had found a few flowers on your way, taking a moment to pluck them from the ground and arranged them nicely. Maybe Ao'nung would like something to help brighten his mood.
Stopping once you reached the beach, you felt your eyes widen in disbelief as Ao'nung and his friends were surrounding Kiri, pointing at her and laughing. Kiri was clearly uncomfortable and trying to walk away, luckily Lo'ak came and started to intercept the boys, only they turned their hateful ways onto him.
You felt your fists clench up, nervously twisting the flowers. You started walking in that direction, Neteyam showing up as well from beside you, making yourself known too.
Ao'nungs ears pressed back, his body feeling hot with embarrassment that you'd caught him being rude to someone.
"Oh look, big brother to the rescue-" Ao'nung reached his hand out, silencing his friend who bowed his head obediently. "I need you to respect my sister from now on," Neteyam threatened, his eyes glaring into Ao'nung who nodded, trying to ease the anxiety in his chest as you approached too.
You tapped Kiris hand, the girl turning to you as you looked her over, as she tried to calm you down, 'I'm fine, no harm done,' she assured, you face turning into one of doubt but giving up in the end.
The three siblings went to walk away, but Lo'ak suddenly turned around and went back to Ao'nung, his smirk and quirked eyebrow making you upset a little. Why was he acting this way? Was he really this mean to them?
Ao'nung didn't know what had happened when Lo'ak punched him, one second he was standing and the next on the floor with his friends helping him up. They all jumped Lo'ak who held his ground to the best of his abilities, but soon found his brother Neteyam jumping in to help him.
You gasped, hands covering your mouth in disbelief, the flowers falling into the sand forgotten. Why were they doing this? 'Kiri, we need to stop them' you told her, but even she could only look on in a mix of horror and laughter.
Deciding that enough was enough, you inserted yourself into the fight, Ao'nungs friends quickly backing away as you pulled them off.
Neteyam hadn't seen you enter the fight, when he felt his shoulder get touched he quickly turned and went to punch the person, barely being able to stop himself before he hit you.
You had flinched inward, arms raised quickly to protect yourself, eyes shut incase of pain. "(Y/N)!" Ao'nung threw himself to you, shoving Neteyam out of the way, his hands gently grabbing yours to bring them down.
You squeaked, the cutest sound Ao'nung had ever heard, and opened your eyes to see Ao'nung checking you for injuries despite his cheek being bruised and lip busted. His eyes held fear and worry, hands moving from your arms to gently hold your face.
An adult nearby had brought his father and Toruk Makto, but he didn't care for the shouts that were happening, he could only focus on you. He brought his hands into view, 'You okay?' Ao'nung questioned, though your face contorted into worry as you held his face, feeling bad when he flinched from your thumb brushing his cheek.
He grabbed your hand and held it at his side as he turned to Neteyam, "Don't you ever touch her again!" If it hadn't been for his father pulling him away with you in tow, he would've attacked the oldest sibling.
"Maybe don't start things your girlfriend tries to finish!" Lo'ak yelled back, getting dragged away by his own father.
Upon entering the Marui, his mother hit him upside the head, "skxqwng! You brought (Y/n) into this?! I pray for the resilience to not break your bones!" Ao'nung averted his mother and fathers gaze, his head down as he couldn't even look to you either. Ashamed you had caught him at his worst moment.
"I leave (Y/n) to take care of your wounds, Great Mother help you find some sense!" Ronal hissed, Tonowari leading her out of the Marui to give you two some privacy.
You slowly walked over, placing a hand on his arm, Ao'nung letting you lead him to the mat and both of you sitting down facing eachother.
'What were you thinking?' You inquired, waiting for his reply as you began to mix a paste together. 'I wasn't thinking, but they deserved it, freaks all of them' he huffed, sucking it back in when you roughly applied the paste to his cheek.
His eyes found yours as you stared at him with hurt, 'What does that make me then? I cannot hear, I cannot speak well, they can communicate freely, I have to look for eyes and attention,'
Ao'nung felt his throat constrict, his hands clamy. You were so beautiful in his eyes, but the way he treated them made you think ill of yourself and that's not want he wanted.
You looked down, eyes glossy from unshed tears. His hand on your chin made you look at him, your lip trembling as your ears pressed back.
Ao'nung let go and signed only one word, but it made your body erupt in flames.
'Beautiful'
~.~
Since the incident with the boys on the beach, Ao'nung tried to be kind in your presence when the sullys were around but when the opportunity to trick Lo'ak revealed itself, he couldn't help it.
When he returned though and found you looking at him with those eyes again. Eyes filled with pain and now disappointment, he knew had to do the right thing.
'I'm sorry,' he apologized, finding you alone by the beach later that night. You turned from him, arms crossed. You weren't going to look at him or reply.
He fell to his knees in front of you, grasping at your hands desperately. You huffed, eyes glaring into him. Ao'nung used to pray he would never see that day you gave him that look, but after what he'd done to Lo'ak he could say he deserved it.
Hands trailing from your hands down to your elbows, he slowly let go and began to speak, "I'm sorry, I know I've been stupid and they don't deserve that, I'm not sure what I was thinking," Ao'nung kept his eyes trained on yours, watching you look exhausted.
"Why risk the danger? What if he'd gotten hurt? Or worse, you," you felt your lips pull back in a snarl, though he could only find pleasure in the fierceness of your face. His heart beat fast knowing you cared about him.
"I wish you would think with this," you placed your hand on his chest, feeling his erratic heartbeat, "not with this," you playfully pushed his forehead, a smile appearing on your lips. You couldn't stay mad at him, not when he smiled at you as softly as he did now.
He grasped your hand, bringing it back to his chest. You felt your own speed up to match his, both of you filled with deep affection for one another, not that the other knew.
You both stared at eachother for what felt like hours, yet only a few minutes had passed, just enjoying eachothers company.
When you had broken out of your daydream however, you quickly pulled your hand away and stood up, eyes darting everywhere but him as you shakily signed, "we shouldn't be doing this, I have to go,"
Ao'nung couldn't stand fast enough when you pulled away, tripping over the sand as you ran. Everything had just been perfect, what had happened?
~.~
You helped Ronal to sit, her stomach slowly getting bigger as the days went on. "Baby is good?" You wondered, a grin on your face of excitement as she nodded, her own smile gracing her features.
'Baby is strong, maybe a boy like Ao'nung,' she replied, you nodding in agreement, 'Ao'nung differently is strong,'
'Yes, he will be a great Olo'eyktan, if only he hurry and choose his Tsahìk,' she let her eyes slip to your figure out of the corner of her sight, seeing you quickly look down and away. Not out of embarrassment it seemed, but out of disappointment.
Ronal frowned, she did not like seeing you so hurt, especially by her own child, lest he be stupid enough to do it.
Ronal placed her hand on your cheek, bringing your face back up to make eye contact with her, 'why do you look so sad? What has happened?'
You tried to brush her off, 'it's nothing, I'm sure whoever he chooses will make a lovely Tsahìk,' you began to ramble, hands moving quickly, 'Ney`ite is the best diver, Alyara is known to sing beautifully, from what I've seen and been told,'
'He deserves someone who can help him feel better on rough days, someone who can actually listen and help with his problems, who loves and cherishes him as he is,'
Ronal tapped your hand, causing you to heat up in realization, you'd been rambling for too long. 'Someone, like you?' She quirked her brow, a knowing smirk on her face.
You shook your head, eyes feeling glossy with tears, 'what do I have to offer him?' You felt a hiccup erupt in your throat from trying to hold in your sobs, 'I cannot listen to his problems, I cannot comfort our children with words when crying, no one would look to me, Eywa may love me as she created me, but surely Ao'nung loves another,'
Ronal felt her eyes catch the sight of a figure standing behind you. Ao'nung could only stand frozen as he saw what you thought of yourself. He's never loved anyone like he loves you, and it's his fault for making you think otherwise.
Ronal grasped your hands firmly, shaking her head at you. Ronal reached a hand for Ao'nung who walked over, his shadow startling you as you looked upwards, his face looking hurt by your own tears.
Ronal placed your hand in his, his fingers gripping your own softly but firm, like a silent promise to never let go.
The Tsahìk bowed in exiting the Marui, leaving both of you alone.
Ao'nung knelt to face you, your cheeks hot with humiliation that he had to see you like this. You tried to look elsewhere but he placed his hand on your cheek, turning your face towards him.
He let go, feeling a moment of Deja Vu as he thought back to two nights ago by the water. When you both had been just as close in the sand.
"You are not less than anyone here," he signed, feeling his heart excelerate with emotion.
'(Y/n), I don't need to hear your voice to know your words are strong and kind, I don't need your words of comfort when your touches are enough,' he placed your hand on his chest, just as he did those nights ago. He hoped you would feel his heart that's beating full of love for you.
You could only feel a bizarre rush of emotions, anger at yourself for letting Ao'nung find out this way, fear in what is to come, yet, love from knowing he felt the same as you did.
'I'm sorry you did not see yourself as adequate when you are more than I could ever dream, the love you hold for our clan speaks words where your lips may fail,'
You felt your lips quiver, tears falling down your face as you tried to hold yourself together.
'I see you, (Y/n), and I would love for you to become my Tsahìk, my mate,'
You laughed, 'I would love to spend my life with you, I see you, Ao'nung,' you pressed your forehead to his, his own tear or two slipping from his eye as you both enjoyed this moment of peace together.
He raised both hands to your face, cupping your head as he brought your lips to his, the soft, plush feeling of your lips nearly driving him mad with desire. Your own hand finding home on his chest and shoulder as you felt weak from lack of air.
Pulling away, you made him stand up with you, his eyes showing curiosity. You smirked at him, 'Wanna go somewhere more private?' Ao'nungs silence spoke for itself as he dragged you out of the Marui, right past his parents who had a sudden look of realization.
"Oh Great Mother," Ronal sighed exasperated, "Looks like our youngest will be close in age to our grandchild," Tonowari mumbled, flinching from Ronal who began to hit him from saying such words, "skxqwng!"
~.~
6K notes · View notes
valeskafics · 3 months
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"White Christmas" - Michael Gavey x Reader
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a/n: combined an anon request for smut/confession and one for virgin michael and virgin reader with one from @sepherinaspoppies for a holiday fic. hope you guys enjoy 🥰🥰🥰🥰
Summary: Unresolved feelings surface when you tell your best friend you have a date.
TW: profanity, innuendo, she/her pronouns, afab reader, loss of virginity, oral f receiving, nonpurposeful orgasm denial, p in v sex, grinding/dry humping, mentions of porn, unprotected sex (idk they're in college, they have little impulse control), michael being an idiot
Word Count: 6,000 words
Rating: 18+, MDNI
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Saltburn characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.
Comments, likes, and reblogs are never required but are immensely appreciated 🩷
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You know it must have seemed quite odd on the first day of classes when everyone was asked to partner up that you and Michael gravitated toward each other immediately, already sitting beside one another in the front row of the lecture hall. Most show up at university without knowing anyone, ready to make friends and meet new people. However, you showed up to university with your best friend. Partnering up for projects was never easier, you never ate lunch alone, always had a willing study partner. The two of you may not be the most popular students at the university by any definition of the word, but you manage to create your own fun.
You’ve known Michael since the pair of you were kids. You were the only one he felt could match wits with him, and so a friendship was born. You can hardly imagine your life without Michael, nor can he imagine his without you. The two of you often joke that you’re Chewie to his Han, the Ani to his Obi Wan. Michael may not have the best social skills, but you’ve never really cared about that. What others see as rudeness, you see as blunt honesty. And it’s something you appreciate. You and Michael have never once lied to each other.
Well, there’s the tiny matter of you having a teensy weensy little crush on him, but that isn’t relevant right now. He’s your best friend and you have some exciting news for him. You enter the bustling cafe, plopping into a seat opposite your best friend, handing him one of the drinks you’ve just gotten from the vending machine. He looks up at you and gives you a quick smile, accepting the beverage and quickly beginning to chug it down.
“What’s got you so happy, then?” You question, arching a brow, “We’ve still got two more exams, Gavey.”
Michael shrugs, “Dunno. It’s just… Ah, forget it. Anyway, what time’s the train home Friday?”
“Half eleven,” you inform him, “So we should grab breakfast around ten.”
He nods in agreement before sighing, “Just got off the phone with my mum. Pretty sure she’s convinced we just study twenty-four hours a day.”
“Don’t we?” You open your binder, leafing through your notes, “We never do anything fun. Mama Gavey has a point. Well, not like we get invited anywhere anyway.”
Michael can’t help but chuckle in response to that. He’s always been the shyer one of the two of you, but your lack of popularity has never particularly bothered either of you. It’s been something that’s bonded you, allowed you to make fun of those you see as buying into the whole thing.
“We’re not exactly social butterflies, you and I.”
“Thought we were meant to come to uni to make friends, and yet here we are.” You smirk at him before adding, “Still stuck with each other.”
Michael returns your smirk, “We’re not stuck with each other. We choose each other. I’d take being friends with you over these superficial idiots any day.”
You rest a hand on your chest in a mock display of sincerity, “Oh, be still my beating heart! You do know how to compliment a girl, Gavey.”
Michael shakes his head at your antics, joking back, “Yeah, I know just what to say to win the ladies over. Just you wait, one day I’ll even get a girlfriend.”
You snort out a laugh, though the idea of Michael with anyone but you leaves a bitter taste in your mouth, “God, imagine you and one of those vapid art history cunts. They’d make you carry their purse for them going to and from class. You’d be more of a personal assistant than a boyfriend. We need to face it, yet another year with no Christmas romance in the cards for us. The Lone Ranger and Tonto ride once again.”
Michael shrugs, taking a sip of his drink and looking at you over the edge of his textbook, “Just us, hm? Nothing but our intelligence and superior education to keep us warm at night.”
“Gotta admit it would be nice not to go home for winter break as virgins though,” you remark absently, still searching for the page of notes you need to revise for your upcoming exam.
Your best friend’s face blanches before going red. He looks at you for a moment, eyes darting away when you look over at him, and shrugs.
“I guess. That would be kind of hard for two introverts to accomplish though. What girl wants a guy who can’t talk to her?”
“You talk to me,” you retort, “A bit too much, I’d reckon.”
Michael snickers at your words, your response catching him off guard, “See, I can talk to you. That’s different. I can’t talk to a girl.”
You feign offense, tossing a crumpled up napkin at him, “Are you saying I’m not a girl?”
He rolls his eyes at you, shaking his head, “That’s not what I meant. It’s easy with you. I don’t have to be worried about every word I say. You understand me. But when it comes to a pretty girl, I get overwhelmed, you know?”
“Are you saying that I’m ugly?”
“God, you know what I was getting at. I’m just…” Michael sighs, “I’m bad with attractive women. It just freaks me out. What am I going to say when I walk up to one? Ask them what their favorite Pokemon is?”
“Charizard,” you reply easily, “Any other answer is wrong.”
Michael smiles at you, shaking his head in amusement, “See? That’s what I mean. Best answer any girl could give. By the way, I prefer Pidgeot.”
Your jaw drops, “Fuck Pidgeot, useless flying little cretin!”
The blond raises an eyebrow at you, barely holding back his laughter, “You take that back! Pidgeot can fly you anywhere you want to go and looks majestic while doing out. What can Charizard do? Burn you?”
You stick your tongue out at Michael, “Charizard can fly too, you idiot!” 
He laughs at your indignation and childishness, thinking to himself that there’s nowhere in the world he’d rather be than right here with you, arguing over his favorite Pokemon, “Yeah, but he looks all clumsy like. Pidgeot is elegant.”
“Elegance doesn’t win gym battles,” you sass, “Anyway. Dragonite. Got you there.”
Michael pauses and thinks for a moment before nodding his head, “Yeah, Dragonite is pretty sick. I’ll give you that one. You win this round.”
You pump your fist victoriously, making Michael roll his eyes at the action, grinning when you declare, “Anyway, I bought you the coolest Christmas present of all time. Prepare to have your mind absolutely blown. You don’t even understand, Mikey. This is the present to end all presents.”
He stares at you, wide-eyed, as he raises an eyebrow, “What is it?”
“Not telling!”
He resists the urge to pout like a child, if only barely, but he has to admit he’s enjoying the back and forth with you. He feels his cheeks heat up slightly when you laugh and smile at him, though he tries to push those thoughts far from his mind. Sure, he might’ve had a crush on you in secondary. But he’s completely past that. You’re his best friend and nothing more.
“Anway, I actually have a date. So, laters.”
Michael’s brows fly into his hairline as he lets out a derisive laugh, “You? A date? Are we being Punk’d? Is Ashton Kutcher going to pop out with his little video camera?”
You shake your head, standing up, “Nope. But Felix Catton is. My date, that is.”
Michael’s face immediately twists into an expression of displeasure, “Felix Catton?”
You narrow your eyes, “What’s that face about then, Gavey?”
“He’s an idiot! And a manwhore! That’s the Felix you’re going on a date with? The prissy rich boy we’ve made fun of all term?”
“Yes, that Felix,” you snark, grabbing your bag, “He’s actually quite nice. Walked me back from the station last weekend and we got to talking and said we’d grab a bite.”
“He’s a tool! Why would you go out with a guy like him? Don’t you have any standards?” Michael knows right then and there that he’s upset you. The way your expression falls, the light in your eyes fading slightly as you avert your gaze. You fiddle with your binder a bit more before abruptly snapping it shut and looking at him again, the sound and your sudden movement serving to startle him. However, he reaches out for your hand, “Look, I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant you deserve better than a guy who’ll just pump and dump you-”
“You don’t even know him,” you retort sharply, pulling your hand away, doing your best to keep the waver out of your voice, “I’ve got to get ready. Bye.”
Michael’s smile drops at the sharpness in your voice and he mumbles, “Good luck, I guess.”
“Yeah, thanks,” you say coolly, walking away.
Michael watches you go and lets out a sigh, tugging at his hair in frustration. Why is he acting like this? He should be happy for you. You’re his best friend, you’re going out with a good-looking guy who’s apparently nice to you.
A guy that isn’t him…
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Michael takes a deep breath and knocks on the door to your dorm, doing his best to keep a level head. He’s doing this to protect you. Not because he likes you. You’re his best friend. And it makes absolutely no difference to him that you’ve answered the door, your hair and makeup done, a little black dress clinging to your figure. He knows he’s staring. He knows he shouldn’t be.
“You’re not Felix,” you scowl, crossing your arms.
He clears his throat, giving an awkward cough before muttering, “Uh, yeah, nope. Definitely not the manwhore of Oxford.”
“What the hell is your damage, Michael?” You snap, glaring at him, “I’m your best mate, you should be fucking happy for me!” When he doesn’t respond, you sigh, throwing your hands up in exasperation, “You know what, forget it. Forget it.”
“Well pardon me for thinking that the manwhore of Oxford doesn’t have much in the way of redeeming qualities! I mean seriously, what are you thinking?!”
“He has one redeeming quality that really stands out and it’s the fact that he isn’t you.”
You slam the door shut in Michael’s face, hearing the indignant yelp he lets out as it nearly smacks his nose. He can’t even think of a comeback for that. That was a good one. But now, he feels his anger rising and begins banging on the door. Even if you don’t open it, at least he can have the satisfaction that he’s annoying you.
“Sod off, Gavey!”
“No! No, you can’t go out with that douchebag! He’s just going to use you to get what he wants and leave you high and dry! Give me ten minutes, I just need to talk to you!”
“I don’t want to,” you retort from behind your door, “Maybe I just want to be like a regular girl for once, Michael! Maybe I just want to go on a date with a boy and have him tell me I look pretty and try to kiss me!”
Hearing that last bit actually makes Michael let out a growl underneath his breath. You want someone else to kiss you? Someone who isn’t him? Like hell he’s going to let that happen. If he had the upper body strength, he’d break the stupid door down to get to you, but as it is, he doesn’t, and so he has to think rationally. He takes a deep breath and tries to speak calmly.
“He’s not a cute boy. And he’s just going to say those things to get a quick shag and never call you again.”
It’s at that moment that you come out of your room, purse and keys in hand, locking up as you begin rambling, “How stupid do you think I am? I mean really! I’m not a child, Michael!”
He’s hit a nerve, he can see. You’re trying to act confident, like you have all of this under control, but Michael knows you. He can see the hesitation behind your eyes as the two of you walk to the lift, hear the tremor in your voice. He’s starting to get to you.
“I just… Look, I know how guys work. Especially assholes like this. I just want to protect you, alright?”
The elevator doors slide open and the two of you get in as you exclaim, “I don’t need you to protect me!”
“Yes, you do! You’re being an idiot! Unless you just want to be manipulated and treated like trash!” Michael seethes, worrying that he might have gone too far when you round on him, nostrils flaring, your eyes burning with anger.
“Yeah? And maybe you’re just pissed I won’t be around for you to bitch at all the time!”
His eyes narrow as he glares back at you. You’re really turning this around on him, twisting his words? He only said it because he cares about you. How can you be so fucking stupid?
“You know that’s not what I’m saying, you’re being deliberately dense-”
“Then what are you saying?” You demand, your face right up against his.
Michael can feel your breath on his skin, your gaze boring into him. This newfound anger of yours is weirdly attractive to him, and he really hopes that you don’t glance downward and see that he has a hard-on right now. But, he realizes that, sooner or later, he’s going to have to fess up. And so, he inhales sharply through his nose and speaks.
“You know what? You’re right. I’m jealous. I don’t want you to go out with Felix. I want you for myself.”
You scoff incredulously, jabbing at his chest with your finger as you snark, “You don’t even see me as a girl, remember?”
Michael winces slightly at how hard you jab at him, but he can’t help his gaze from moving to your lips. Your eyes, blown wide with anger and yet still so beautiful. You’re wearing lipgloss, he notes, not a common occurrence. And it makes those lips of yours look so fucking kissable.
“Say something!” You all but shout as the elevator door opens, “Michael, fucking say something-”
At that moment, something in him snaps and his lips come slamming down onto yours, arms wrapping around you. Your eyes go wide. His kiss is awkward, clumsy. Unpracticed. But you can feel the emotion behind it as he nibbles at your lower lip, desperate for you to allow him to deepen the kiss. And you? You return it, hesitant and unsure, but you slowly kiss him back. It’s intense, and passionate. And kissing your best friend is nothing like you ever thought it would be. He accidentally bites down on your tongue and you wince, but you chase his tongue with your own, not wanting to let go quite yet. You can taste his chapstick, the slight hint of chocolate from the Crunchie bar he was no doubt eating only a few minutes before coming to speak to you. When the two of you finally pull apart, your eyes open slowly as you look up at him.
“W-what was that?”
“It was a kiss, what the fuck do you think it was?”
“Don’t be fucking cheeky,” you mutter, “The nerve.”
He smiles at you, uncharacteristically soft, reaching out to brush your hair behind your ear as he speaks again, “Did… Did you like it? Was it good?”
“No, it wasn’t good! You bit my tongue for one thing, you utter twat, and for another thing- Mmmph!”
He cuts you off with another kiss, this one a bit more graceful than the last. Maybe he shouldn’t tease you so much, but he can’t help it. Not when you pinch your brows together like that and try to scold him, looking so entirely adorable, those lips of yours just begging to be kissed. When the two of you break apart again, he gives you a little grin.
“First one was just practice. This… This one was the real thing, yeah?”
You blink at him owlishly for a moment and hear Felix calling out your name. You glance out, seeing the elevator doors about to close, Felix walking toward the pair of you. And you have a decision to make.
And you choose him.
You press the button for your floor and pull Michael into another heated kiss, your arms wrapping around his, the doors closing with a quiet thud. Michael doesn’t hesitate to kiss you back, his hands resting on the small of your back as the two of you lose yourself in the kiss. With every time your lips meet, the feeling grows more and more natural. It’s strange, but it feels so right.
Like it was meant to happen.
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Back in your dorm, the two of you fall onto your bed, a heap of tangled limbs and mussed hair as you continue kissing, only breaking apart so you can catch your breath. You lay on top of Michael, gazing down at him as your lips ghost along his jaw before you finally speak.
“I want you to be my first. Not Felix. You.”
Michael’s heart pounds in his chest. Fuck, did the room just get warmer? He can’t help but smile at you, holding you captive with his intense gaze.
“Really? You really want your first time to be with me?”
You nod, asking softly, “Do you want me to be your first too?”
He answers without hesitation, “Yes, absolutely.”
Michael leans up to pull you into another kiss, butterflies fluttering in his stomach as your hands move to his hair. He can feel his cock straining against his pants, achingly hard as you slowly move your hips against his.
“What if this ruins things between us?” You ask between kisses, “What if stuff isn’t the same?”
“I don’t care,” he admits, “This could wreck everything but all l I can think about right now is your lips, your face, you…” The look in his eyes is so earnest that it almost makes your heart ache, “Please let me love you. I’ve wanted to for so long.”
“You… Wait. Pause, rewind what?” You ask, sitting up, “How long? Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
Michael’s cheeks redden, “Since we met. I mean, I’ve always liked you.”
“We met in Year 5, you idiot,” you say, slapping his chest.
He grins as you hit him, finding the whole thing kind of adorable in a way. The moment he met you back in Year 5, he was drawn to you. Not because he thought you were cute, though that played a part in it. Because you were witty and so kind to him. And you became the most important person in his life.
You lean in, kissing him softly before mumbling, “Shit, that means we could’ve been making out this whole time since I’ve wanted you since then too.”
Your admission sends Michael’s mind into a frenzy - you’ve thought of him the way he’s always thought of you? It’s almost too good to be true and he feels like a giddy schoolboy.
“You wanted me too?”
“Do you really think all those times I ‘accidentally’ answered the door in just a shirt and my knickers were accidents?”
Okay, so it was obvious. You were being obvious and he was too stupid to realize. Teasing him and dropping hints.
“I just assumed you were making a statement against the patriarchy and showing you weren’t ashamed to display your female body or what not. Not that you were trying to seduce me!”
You slap your forehead, “For a genius, you’re a right fucking idiot.”
Michael can’t help but let out a bark of a laugh at your words because of how true they are, “Yeah, for a couple of geniuses, we’re quite obtuse.”
You smile as he pulls you into another kiss, giggling at the groan he lets out as you grind your hips against his, “Oh, that was a cute sound.”
“Fuck off, it wasn’t cute,” he grumbles, squirming against you slightly, embarrassed, “I haven’t done anything cute.”
You brush your nose against Michael’s, whispering, “Everything you do is cute. Or annoying. Or an odd combination of both.”
It’s such a simple gesture, touching your nose to his, but it feels so intimate. He takes a deep breath, looking into your eyes, lips upturned in a small smile.
“You’re a bit of a tease, you know that, right?”
You grin, grinding your hips against him again, “Yeah?”
Michael pouts, his cheeks flushing as he mumbles, “Yeah. You love seeing me squirm. You’re having way too much fun with this.”
“Sorry,” you giggle, leaning in to kiss just below his ear, loving the way he shivers.
The feeling is electrifying to Michael, and when you giggle, it sends a jolt through his body. God, you’re a menace. An irresistible little menace. But now? It feels like you’re his menace.
You tug at his sweater, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the floor. You run your hands along his bare chest, smiling to yourself. Michael gazes up at you, awestruck. You want him. You really want him. You lean in, your lips pressed to his neck, moving lower and lower, your tongue tracing his collarbone.
“You don’t realize how gorgeous you are, do you?” You murmur.
Michael’s breath catches in his throat at your words. He’s always thought he’s nothing more than an average looking guy, but the way you see him? It’s incredible. You look at him in a way that makes him feel like his blood is on fire. He feels handsome, sexy. Desired. For the first time in his life. Between kisses, you manage to slide that little black dress of yours up over your head, letting it join his sweater on the floor. Michael’s eyes go wide with wonder, watching the slight bounce of your tits as you lean back. You’re so fucking beautiful that he can’t help but stare. And then, when you unclasp your bra, his jaw literally drops. You lean in, pressing your soft, warm chest against his as you kiss him again, his hands resting on your hips as you continue to roll them against his, grinding yourself against his bulge.
When he lets out a quiet little whimper, you glance down, seeing the wet patch on his trousers and quickly give him a reassuring smile, seeing the way he looks as if he wants to die from embarrassment, “Hey, it’s okay. It’s, uh, kind of flattering that I managed to do that. That you wanted me that bad, you know?”
You’re so fucking sweet, and it’s making him want to kiss you again. So that’s what he does, moaning as you push him back down on the bed, kissing his lips, his jaw, then his chest. Your tongue swirls around one of his nipples and he lets out a quiet gasp, breathing quickening as you move lower, kissing his stomach. You give him a coy little smile.
“You’re adorable.”
He thinks he could just about melt into the bed at that seductive look in your eyes. His brain, normally so sharp, feels like mush. He can’t think of any way to describe you other than perfect. You tug at his jeans, tossing them aside, gently dragging your nails along his thighs. He can feel his whole body trembling from your teasing, the light scratch feeling like heaven. He can feel his cock twitch slightly, and though he’s not hard again yet, he knows it won’t be long. You look up at him and a nervous laugh escapes your lips.
“I’ve never done this before.”
Michael can’t help but smile, realizing that this is just as new for you as it is for him, tucking that same stray piece of hair behind your ear that came loose before, “That’s alright. I’ve got a good idea on how this goes anyways. I’ve watched my fair share of research material.”
You let Michael switch the two of you around so that you’re laying underneath him, though his words make you sass, “Research material? What, you mean trying to rub one out to Babestation after school before your mum came home?”
Michael gives you a half-hearted glare, “Well, yes obviously. What else would I watch? Though Busty Asian Beauties isn’t a bad one-”
“What the fuck is Busty Asian Beauties?” You giggle, slapping your hand over your mouth in an attempt to calm your laughter, “Idiot.”
“Okay, okay, enough research material talk, can I proceed with what I was going to do or do you want to continue talking about the best places to watch porn?”
“Gee, I don’t know, Mikey, let’s workshop this.”
He shakes his head at you, the sight of you beneath him, bare save for your panties, has him feeling almost feral with want. He can barely keep himself in check, shivering with anticipation as he leans in to kiss your neck, down to your chest. You let out a whine as he bites down a bit too hard.
“Gentler, Michael.”
He pulls back immediately, the last thing he wants is to hurt you, “Sorry, you okay?”
You nod, “Yeah, just easy on the teeth. Damn, you’ve got a set of chompers on you.”
He snickers, your teasing banter mixed with your nervous demeanor making his heart flutter. He’s always prided himself on being logical, and being able to anticipate every possible outcome to a scenario, but this? This is beyond what he ever could have dreamed. He moves to kiss your lower stomach and you watch with bated breath, though you burst into laughter as his chin tickles your navel, squirming away from him.
“Christ, that tickles.”
Michael pulls away, bursting into laughter as well, having thought he was going to make major progress with that little maneuver, only to turn you into a giggling mess, “S-sorry! I thought that was the next move! Should I try lower?”
“Yeah, okay,” you manage between laughs, though your lips part, eyes going wide as he presses a kiss to your pussy over the fabric of your panties. You stare at him, watching as he slides the garment down your legs and tosses it to the ground, more and more clothes piling up at the foot of your bed, only his boxers left to go now. You watch as he buries his tongue inside you and moan, your fingers twisting in his hair as he laps against your folds eagerly. A little too eagerly for your taste, the sensation making you squirm.
“Woah, slow down! It’s my cunt, not a burlap sack, Michael, fuck’s sake.”
He rolls his eyes, wanting nothing more to devour you when you’re so sensitive like this, but apologizes, “Well, sorry! I’m sort of excited here. Wanted this for so long.”
“Me too, but damn, just go a little easy!”
Michael nods before moving his lips back to your cunt, his tongue slowly tracing your center, licking at you gently, his nose rubbing at your clit as he slowly pushes his tongue inside you. He’s slower now, more steady, and you love it. You moan his name softly, singing his praises, how good he is. It spurs him on, drives him crazy, and he holds your thighs apart, continuing to move his tongue against you until he hears you let out a particularly loud cry of his name. He smirks to himself, pulling back, only to see you glaring up at him.
“What the fuck, Michael?!” You let out a near sob of frustration, smacking his shoulder, “I was so fucking close!”
He winces, feeling quite guilty for messing up so badly and quickly asks, “Do you want me to do it again?”
“No, let’s just do the thing.” You say impatiently, “Now.”
He arches a brow, knowing what you mean but wanting to tease you, “The ‘thing’? What thing is that? Are you saying,” he whispers against your lips softly, “You want me to…”
“Yes, you prick, that’s exactly what I’m saying!” You scowl, “Hurry up!”
He all but cackles at your cursing at him, feeling all the more turned on by it, quickly getting out of his boxers and tossing them to the floor. He moves to lay on top of you again, pressing a kiss to your lips before slowly pressing the tip of his cock against you, pushing in slowly. You wince at the sting, letting out a quiet whimper. Michael stills, panicking. He knows it can hurt your first time and it takes everything in him to hold himself back. He just wants to push all the way inside you, feel your walls around him, but he moves slowly, gazing at you in concern.
“Are you okay?” He whispers.
“I’m fine,” you manage through gritted teeth, “Just keep going.”
He trusts your judgment, bottoming out inside of you, propping himself up on his arms as he peppers kisses all over your face, attentive to your reactions. After a few moments, he feels you relax against him, your arms wrapping around him as you press your lips to his. You nod at him, telling him without words that you want him to move. And he begins rolling his hips against yours, hearing the little moan you let out at the friction. He grins, moving a bit faster, loving the way you squeeze around him, your body trembling as you wrap your arms around him.
Your toes curl as you feel him thrust deeper and deeper, the fat head of his cock brushing against your most sensitive spot, his hips stuttering, movements and breathing growing more erratic while the coil in your stomach begins to wind. And then, you feel him spill himself inside you with a groan. He looks at you, horrified at finishing before you. But you rest your hands on his cheeks, smiling gently.
“It’s okay. It happens to a lot of guys, I’ve heard.” Your words reassure him, but he still can’t help the guilt - he’s such a loser, how could he have blown his load so quickly? Then you give him a cheeky smirk, “You can use your hands to finish me off. Or your mouth.”
He bites his lip, leaning in to whisper in a low voice, “How about both?”
You look at him, confused, eyes going wide when he immediately moves to sit on his haunches between your thighs, mouthing at your pussy just as eagerly as before. He lifts your thighs up over his shoulders, burying his face between them, moving his face from side to side, glasses fogging up from the heat between you two, licking at you over and over and over until you let out a cry of his name, finally spilling yourself on his tongue, feeling like every nerve ending in your body has been set on fire. But he’s not finished. He quickly moves to push two fingers inside you, moaning at the feel of your wetness around the digits, moving them a bit too fast for your taste, but you say nothing, too consumed by the feeling of him rubbing up against your sweet spot. You grab his wrist to hold his hand in place.
“Right there, Michael, fuck!”
He nods, brow furrowing in concentration as he moves his fingers faster and faster, your eyes rolling back as the coil in your stomach tightens again, a thin sheen of sweat covering both of your faces. And then suddenly? You’re spilling yourself against his fingers, nearly screaming his name.
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After a few moments of silence and both of you staring at the ceiling, you mumble, “Whoa.”
Michael breathes heavily, a smile on his face, “Yeah.”
You turn on your side to face him and question, vulnerability on your face and in your voice, “We’re… We’re still best friends, right? Even if we shagged?”
He nods vehemently, “Of course. Can’t imagine not being your best friend.”
“Cool,” you nod, “So is this… A thing?”
He chuckles slightly, resting a hand on your hip as he turns to face you, “We can be. Do you want to be a thing?”
“I dunno, I asked first!”
He can’t help but laugh again, pressing his lips to your forehead. His perfect girl. You drive him crazy, your sass, your humor, your face, your body. Everything.
“Yes, I want to be a thing. We are definitely a thing.”
“Okay, so this is a thing,” you nod, “Cool. Cool cool cool.”
Michael shakes his head affectionately at your rambling, kissing you for a long moment before murmuring, “I have one more thing to ask you, though.” He takes a deep breath, his nerves nearly getting the better of him before he blurts out, “Be my girlfriend.”
“Hm,” you pretend to think, “Let’s weigh the pros and cons.”
He rolls his eyes, flicking your forehead, making you yelp, “Pros. My undivided attention, my puns, getting you flowers, making out with me for eternity. Loads of pros.”
“Cons, it’s you,” you snark, making him smack your bum playfully. You giggle but your voice grows more somber when you speak again, “Con. If we break up, I don’t just lose my boyfriend. I lose my best friend too.”
Michael doesn’t say anything for a moment but then he whispers, “I love you. I’m in love with you. And I have no intention of breaking up. So I’m sort of begging you here to give me a chance. Because I don’t think I can live without kissing you again.”
“Okay,” you breathe, “You’re my boyfriend then. BF and BFF in one neat little package.”
He hates when you use IM speak in real life normally, but this makes him laugh. Then, you move away from him, mumbling.
“Lemme grab your present. If I don’t give it to you, I’m literally going to keep it for myself. It’s just that cool. I swear.” He watches as you scramble out of bed and grab his sweater, the maroon color complimenting you perfectly as you pull it, and nothing else, on, “I’m keeping this by the way. Girlfriend privilege. ‘S mine now.”
He should’ve known. Cheeky little minx. You have him wrapped around that little finger of yours with no effort at all. You always have. And the idea of fucking you while you’re wearing nothing but his sweater is more than a little appealing.
You hand him a wrapped box, grinning almost maniacally, making him arch a brow, “Prepare to have your mind blown.”
He tears open the wrapping paper, dying to know what it is, eyes going wide when the paper is gone and he can finally see what you’ve got him.
“No fucking way. No fucking way. Slave 1?!” He stares at you in wonder, mind absolutely blown, “H-how did you even… How much was this?!”
“Fifty quid. Got it on layaway.” He immediately grabs you, pulling you into a kiss, feeling a plethora of emotions, pinching your side as you sass, “If you don’t like it, I can just keep it-”
“Fuck off, it’s mine!” He beams at you, cupping your face in his hands, “This is… Wow. Let’s put it together? And then I’ll grab my present for you from my dorm.”
“Is this our first couple activity?” You tease as the two of you begin unboxing the set, “Well, other than the shagging, of course.”
Michael gives you an amused look, before leaning in to press a kiss to your lips, soft and gentle, “Happy Christmas… Girlfriend.”
Your smile is radiant as you turn to him, kissing him back, pulling away only to whisper, “Happy Christmas, boyfriend.” You pause before joking, “Was a white Christmas indeed.”
“Fuck’s sake, you just had to spoil the moment.”
“Yeah.”
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884 notes · View notes
cassanderasblog · 9 months
Note
if it wasn't too much to ask since i had asked something last sunday, could i make a duke tristan valentine (becoming the villain's family) x reader please
Their third wheel
Yandere! Sabina Valentine x co wife reader x yandere! Tristan Valentine
Warning: mention of sexual activity, possessiveness, child abuse, angst with happy ending, one sided love , mutual pining, minors not allowed.
Authors note: Thanx for requesting love !!! Hope you will like this!!
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You can't even think how in the hell you got stuck in this position. Tristan ramming his cock into your once virgin hole and cumming inside your already overflowing womb the nth time . And Sabina pouting and saying that there is no way her husband's cock feels better than her mouth and fingers.
Pouting and cooing , kissing and wiping your tears she is slowly rubbing your overstimulated little nub. Pinching and flicking it, making you clench around Tristan who groans when you suffocate his dick by strangling and milking him .
Your
back arcs so beautifully for him when Sabina rubs your clit. His handslides along with that curve of your back. Pushing himself inside you more . With the potion that Sabina had made you drink... It's impossible for you to not get pregnant.
They can do anything to keep you with them... You thought you will be a the problematic third wheel in their relationship??? That's why you were leaving them??? They will kill the people whom you were thinking to stay with after leaving them.
They will break your leg and chain you to their room if they will need to. They will make sure that you are always heavy with their child. They know you love children so much and the children love you too. You will never think about leaving your children with them right??
He looked down at your passed out body. Your womb pushing out excess cum from your little hole every time he thrust . Sabina kissed your cheeks. She opened drawer to reach out for the bunny tail plug she bought.
Tristan made sure to pull his cock out slowly and Sabina immediately pushed the plug into your gapping hole. Tristan laid on you left side pulling you close to him kissing your forehead. Sabina hugged you from behind....
"She is perfect right???"
Sabina ask wishpered.
"The most perfect thing I've ever seen in my life... He sighed."
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Your father offered your hand to Tristan Valentine when Sabina was unconscious. You were trembling like a leaf when your father presented you to him. He saw you and immediately accepted you. You became his second wife in a yound age of 20. Your father was a greedy man , he didn't came to see you once after that . You thought Tristan will hate you for sure and hide under the covers on your wedding night.
When he came and asked you to sit and turn around you were very troubled. What did he want?? But you did what he said. He slide your nightgown after opening it your back bare and fully in view to him. Your head down your arms hiding your bare breasts.
And then your felt something cold and soothing being applied on your back. After he was done he dressed you back and kissed your forehead.
"Don't worry I'll not touch you until you will let me."
You turned around to meet his eye , your eyes filled with tears.
"Just tell me this... Those Whip marks on your back.... They are from your father???"
You nodded in response.. infact each and every mark on your body was due to abuse by your father. You told him how you were a way for him to vent his anger. You even begged Tristan to never send you back . You promised him that you will never ask for anything or create trouble for him.
He kissed you forehead telling you that he will never let you go. After that you meet Aria who became very fond of you and Vincent too and Llyod too but he was more of a tsundere to you. The kids liked you a lot.
And You were with Aria when she healed The duchess Sabina. It was you who said how beautiful she looks . And you prayed to God to heal her soon. How can someone so pure could exist. Tristan and Llyod who were standing out of the door who heard your prayer thought.
Aria healed Sabina and you were very happy but upto only an extent. You then realised that you were just a replacement for her and as she is back you should leave the place. Sabina even un her half consciousness was able to hear your wish ; was very fond of you.
She knew you like her a lot . As you visit her when he rests or pretends to sleep. Once she had enough of your silly sneakyness and she caught you when you entered her room. You blushed and were about to leave when she said.
"Baby Sister where are you going?? do you perhaps not like me because we share the same husband??"
You panicked and denied . You two then talked and she became obsessed with your pureness. In Tristan and Sabina's mind everything was going alright. You were there with them ; their lovely bunny. But in your eye you were just a problematic third wheel for them.
So you contacted a temple and sent a letter asking if they need any maidens. And unfortunately you forgot that it was Tristan and Sabina's household... Tristan was trembling with anger holding the letter written by you that was meant to be sent to the temple.
Sabina was biting her lips and thinking something. Was their affection not enough for you to show you they both love and wanted you ??? It's ok....they will show you how much they love you. Aria came to your room that night. Telling you her concern for you that you look tired and she offered to sing for you.
And you passed out due to her song . Soon as she left the room Sabina thanked her.
"She will not leave us right???"
"No dear infact you are going to have a little brother or sister soon!! "
She hugged the girl and Aria returned to her own room. Tristan and Sabina entered your bedroom. You look so pretty like this... They could do anything to keep you safe... And by they mean anything....
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You were sitting on the swing in the garden your hand soothing the heavy belly and Aria Lloyd and Vincent talking to you and asking about the baby. Soon Sabina came into the view and she chided the children away.
"Dear you feeling good today?? "
"Yes....I..."
"Say it dear is there something you want??"
"I wanted to eat lemon cake...."
"Awww my bunny is loving sour foods now a days.... I will ask the chef to make the cake."
"You shouldn't pamper her too much... Look she is already looking like a happy chipmunk when you said you will ask the chef to make the cake..."
Tristan who appeared out of nowhere said and you pouted.
It's what the baby wants!!!!!
You whined . And they both laughed.
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Dances Avec Les Etoiles ft. Heeseung
Synopsis: God how boring is love? For Lee Heeseung, it was perhaps the most boring thing in this rotten world. But for his parents, it meant buisness. And buisness meant getting Heeseung married off to a princess from another kingdom. And when the princess shares a peculiar interest, Heeseung starts to believe in Cupid again.
Pairings: Prince!Heeseung × Princess!fem!reader
Warnings: Brief smut scene in the beginning (not with reader), SMUT MINORS DNI (with reader), fingering, edging, orgasm control, french kissing hehe, dom!Heeseung × kinda dom!reader, mentions of food, sexual tension, hee is kind of a pervert, suggestive at places, fluff, swearing, angst, did I mention sexual tension, enemies to lovers (kind of), arranged marriage, playboi heeseung × playgirl!reader, reader wants adventure and Heeseung is the adventure
A/N: I have been writing and editing this for so long now and it's only part 1! Thank you for being patient with me and I promise to release the second part which has more smut in it very soon! @candewlsy your daddy papi has arrived
Part 1 || Part 2 || The wedding
The French Quotes Series Masterlist
Lee Heeseung was a man of logic.
Which left no room for the poetry in him, although he did say that he enjoyed it a lot.
He was a prince, a ruler soon to ascend the golden throne of Tarnow. Stupid name, he had always thought, it sounded like a wheelbarrow carrying a bunch of tar pieces.
But he had often heard that the poets never allowed someone to go on with their life just like that. What kind of poets would they be if they did that?
And so he had to be betrothed. With a star studded ring on his finger, an imitation of a smile on his face, and a bride by his arm. And a ceremony where there would be flowers, and dancing.
Dancing!
Heeseung had a clandestine love for dancing. The curve of arms and fingers, the movement of hips, the ballet of the feet twirling to create an invisible picture on the ground. And yet, no one knew of this rendezvous of his. Well, almost no one.
"Hyung are you really sure you're alright?" Heeseung's daydream was interrupted by a honey sweet voice from above him. "Get down from the tree, idiot." Another voice, strong as iron reprimanded him.
Sim Jake and Park Jay.
Two of Heeseung's band of best friends.
They had grown up together, due to their parents being close friends, what with the never ending borders they shared between the kingdoms. And he could always count on them to give him advice, whether it be of a bastard's or of a sage's.
"Unless you want to break your arm again, get down from that dumb tree." Jay scolded the brown haired boy, who was, at the moment, hanging upside down from a willow tree, "But you need another reason to visit your best friend don't you loverboy?" Jay added with a cheeky smile.
"As if you have more love in your life" Jake shot back, promptly jumping down from the branches onto the grass with a soft thump.
"Would you two stop bickering and help me out of my current predicament?" Heeseung snapped, letting out a sigh and leaning against the bark of the willow. He had always liked this particular tree. He remembered his mother's hands carefully handling the roots and planting the tiny sapling into the wet mud, talking about how the Duchess' daughter had ran off with some ragamuffin. It was a majestic tree now, like how the poets described the trees of the Gods to be like. He had liked that poem a lot, the one about trees and princesses and first kisses under first snows.
"You're going to get married to a completely random princess, big deal." Jay rolled his eyes, settling comfortably onto the freshly mowed grass. He was often the more mature one out of all of them.
"Where on earth are Sunghoon and Sunoo?" Heeseung questioned, checking his pocket watch. He shook his head, his other two friends didn't exactly know the meaning of being on time.
"Probably kissing themselves." Jake smirked, flicking a leaf at Jay to annoy him, which worked when Jay got up from his sleeping position with a glare smeared on his face and slapped Jake's head.
"Just pretend you have affection towards her and all that and it'll be over in a minute." Jay adviced wisely, looking over at Heeseung's drooping figure. "I wish it was that easy." Heeseung sighed, "I don't want to get married, what if she's snobbery?"
"Hyung don't get poetic." Jay said sternly, moving his head to face Heeseung, "What is even love in these ages? And I am sure she'll be wonderful enough to make you some heirs."
"What's her name again?" Jake questioned, looking at the tree with his tongue stuck out, probably contemplating whether he should climb it again or not, "I hear she's of the far East."
"Princess Y/N of the Kingdom of Witchelm." Heeseung scoffed, "Ooh maybe they have witches!"
"Absolutely not." Jay sighed with a tiring expression.
"Whatever, I'm hoping to pay Priscilla a visit today." Heeseung pushed his hair out of his face.
"Does she love you yet?" Jake ashed with a cheeky grin.
"God I hope not." Heeseung shuddered, "She's just got a good mouth and a nice pussy for me to take. See you later boys."
"Fuck I needed this." Heeseung sighed laying back. The girl looked up at him as she placed her hand onto his cock, her other hand resting on his thigh. She licked the underside of it slowly back up, circling her tongue around the head.
"Fuck has your mouth gotten prettier since last time?" Heeseung chuckled, looking at the girl.
"Shut up and let me do my work." She responded, "You know this is the last time right?"
Heeseung scoffed and placed his hands on her head. "I know."
The girl took the head into her mouth, causing him to jolt. He patted her head which soon turned into him gripping her hair when she went back down again, now bobbing her head up and down. Making sure she reached all the way to the base, Heeseung helped by pushing Priscilla down further.
“Keep doing that thats a good girl” he stuttered out. The hand that was on his thigh reached down to massage his balls, lightly squeezing.
Would his new bride be good at giving him what he wants? Heeseung didn't know anything about her. Nor did he care really. She's probably the regular Mary Jane, a dull lifeless, smiling body, without balance in anything. He wished and prayed fervently that some sort of ballerina took her place instead.
Maybe that'd finally make him happy.
The reflection of Heeseung's mirror stared back at him, not noticing the utter beauty of his eyes. He never cared much for his handsome features, much preferring when people complemented how light he was on his feet.
But it was shameful for his parents.
Dancing? For a crown Prince? Preposterous!
It would have been outrageous if the kingdom found out that their prince preferred dancing over decrees. It wasn't that his mother and father didn't encourage his dancing, they loved seeing their son do what he loved. But to be a prince, a ruler, was to keep a reputation, and that couldn't be spoilt by something their son loved doing.
Heeseung sighed, taking a deep breath and counting his steps, every slow movement bringing him his happiness back inch by inch. Would his bride like dancing?, he wondered, that would be a pleasant thing. Atleast one thing in common with her.
His thoughts wandered carelessly as his feet did, sliding across the floor effortlessly, a gentle sway of the arm here and there, the ballet of a sawn without his mate.
He would be betrothed by tomorrow.
A fateful tomorrow, he hoped.
"And now we introduce, Princess Y/N of the Witchelm Kingdom!"
The man had a ridiculously nasally voice in Heeseung's opinion. Maybe they should replace him with someone who doesn't sound much like a parrot.
"Heeseung stand up straight." Heeseung's mother snapped at him from his right shoulder. Silently grumbling, he obeyed and adjusted his drooping figure along with the drowsy expression on his face. He would have rather ate a carrot than do this right now. The sound of bells and trumpets and what not, and all the ridiculously maroon stained curtains irritated him far too much. The sun was broiling hot, and there was not even an inch of a cloud in the sky. And his nose was rather itchy as well. Perhaps he should ask Jake for that rum again...
"Welcome to Tarnow, Princess." His father's formal voice broke Heeseung out of his train of thoughts, and as he snapped back to his senses, he realised the presence of a figure standing before him. Not caring to lift his eyes to look at the figure, he quickly bowed.
"How was the journey, my dear?" His mother asked in a saccharine sweet voice. She only ever used them with babies, Jay and extra important guests.
"Well the carriage certainly did not like the hefty rocks, but it was pleasant." Heeseung thought he had heard an angel speak for a moment, "Your kingdom is magnificent, Your Majesties." The figure in front of Heeseung curtsied, and that's when he caught a whiff of her perfume.
It was intoxicating, as if it was pulling his closer.
His eyes flickered up, to take a peek at the woman. She was clad in deep shades of maroon with gold trimmings illuminating her figure perfectly. Was this his bride to be?
"Prince Heeseung." You threw a curtsy to him, noticing the way his fawn like eyes were staring at you. Maybe the rumours were right. All the princes of Paradoxica were scoundrels who lounged after women.
"Princess Y/N." Heeseung finally bowed back, and you took note of the fact that his eyes stayed to the ground, not lingering over your figure as most usually did. Maybe he did have a tinge of respect in him.
"Well why wait here in this heat? Shall we lunch inside?" The Queen said in a joviant manner, extending her hand to you, which you took gratefully and stepped inside the castle walls, finally feeling at peace.
You were completely unaware of the pair of deer eyes following you.
Heeseung's first thought upon seeing you was the way you wore yourself. He had often learnt that the best of dancers always moved differently, which was always evident whenever he'd attend balls. The truest dancers would always walk as if they owned the very earth they walked on. Heeseung always felt that they had clouds for shoes.
And the way you walked, the way you held your shoulders, the way you each step echoed with the sound of the air, there was no way you couldn't have been a dancer like him.
But you were a princess, he reminded himself, his soon to be Queen. Dancing was to be put to the side for some time.
Or so he thought.
The luncheon had went quite well in your opinion. Apart from the fact that the King and Queen would not stop talking about the proposal ceremony and the wedding, and their son smirking into his peas whenever his parents came upon the topic of grandchildren, it had gone by in a breeze.
You were happy that Heeseung hadn't talked to you. You were far too tired to have any 'getting to know each other' conversations. He seemed a bit monotonous to you, at first glance atleast. You had always learnt never to judge a book by it's cover. But sometimes advice was made to be ignored, so you simply went on with your day, not caring about what kind of a person Heeseung was.
The rumours were enough for you to summarise his persona anyway. The people of Witchelm talked about him as if he was a splendid rose, one everyone wanted to take a look at. Kind, courageous, handsome, generous, blah blah blah. You would rather have married a fish if it was described as more interesting than him. Although the rumour that he really 'got around' in terms of pleasure had interested you. If that had been true, maybe you did like him. Atleast he would be understanding to the fact that had lied to everyone that you were still a virgin.
Tarnow had been a luxuriant kingdom, known to everyone as the first kingdom formed in all of Paradoxica, the oldest one, it spoke quite well through the aching castle walls when you were exploring the southern wing.
It was in a word, beautiful, with the fading architecture and all the women clad in luxurious silver, dancing their hearts out on the street. How you wished ever so fervently that you could join them.
Dancing was your life ever since you took your first steps. Witchelm was renowned for dancing, for ballet, ballroom and everything in between. It was a pity that you hadn't heard anything about the hobbies of the Prince. Perhaps he preferred dancing too. That would be a pleasant surprise, you thought, as you stepped into your chambers, where all your luggage had been arranged neatly.
"I think I can take over from now on." You curtsied to the girl who had led you over to the chambers. She bowed back and was about to leave when you thought to ask her the question that had been lingering in your mind for long.
"Is there a ballroom here?" The girl turned back abruptly at your question. She had hair as dark as coal and eyes even darker. A pretty sight.
"Oh yes, your Highness." She smiled at you, "We have the biggest ballroom in all of Paradoxica in fact. Most of the King's balls and state dances are held here."
"Then, there must be a place where they practice their dances is there not?"
The girl chuckled at your question and clicked her feet together.
"There is a humongous room in the western part of the castle that's basically empty space for dancing. But the Crown Prince spends most of his time there at night, so we aren't allowed to go there much. I can show you the way if you want."
"The western wing." You sat on the bed with a soft thump, "I can find my route don't worry. Thank you for everything."
The crown prince and dancing..... Peculiar. Very peculiar, you thought as you lay on the bed. You were thankful for finally getting out of the heavy purple gown, and putting on some actually comfortable robes. Although you had begged your mother to let you wear your favourite lavender shades, your mother has refused and put you in the darkest and most sweltering maroon gown. It was safe to say that you were a panting dog by the time you got out of the gown.
Picking up your quill and paper, you smoothed out the creases as you thought about what to write to your best friend back home. Gaeul was the kind of person to find out everything about someone before loving them, no matter what methods she used, so it wouldn't be a problem if you wrote 'i think the Prince likes dancing because a girl told me an extremely insignificant detail' in the letter to be sent to her.
Dipping your quill into the ink pot, you were about to start your letter when-
Knock knock knock
The door tapped thrice. It was safe to say that you were confused. Lunch was just five hours ago and it wasn't even dinner time yet, the sun hadn't set even though the sky had turned a deep purple.
Donning a clock over your robes, you stepped out of the comfortable silks of the bed and strode over to the magnificent, carved door. Tugging on the handle, the door made a creaking noise at it opened, making you cringe at the sound. You caught a figure lingering at the door. The same girl was there, the one who had led you here earlier today.
"Oh hello there." You said, opening the door to its full length, "What is the matter?"
The girl shuffled her feet before your eyes fell on her hands. A tiny black box.
"Someone left this in my chambers with a note attached to it your Highness." She said, "It gave the instruction to give it to you."
You looked at the box with uncertainty before snapping your eyes up to the girl. You took the box from her, your finger gently brushing against hers.
"What is your name?" You questioned, realising that you hadn't asked for it before. "Giselle, Your Highness." She answered, still looking at the ground.
"Thank you Giselle. You may go now." You shot her a smile which she returned meekly and scampered off.
Closing the door behind you, you eyed the box with uncertainty. What if it was some poison which wafted into the air as soon as you opened it? What if there was a lizard inside? You really did hate those dumb creatures. Thousands of thoughts flooded your mind as you looked at the box. You were reminded of your father's words to stop reading so many books with plots of bloodshed and mystery. As if you'd ever stop.
Caressing the box with your hand, you noticed how fine of a quality it had, it couldn't have been sent by any ordinary person. You lifted the lid of the box with hesitation running through your veins, only to find inside......a necklace?
A dainty pearl necklace lay inside the box, along with a tiny note, which you did not notice at first. You were far too captivated by the shimmering necklace. Pearls were a rare occurence in Witchelm, with it being a landlocked kingdom. But Tarnow, you had heard, had a vast coastline, so pearls were easily found.
You pondered upon who it could have been sent by. A secret admirer perhaps? The thought did excite you. But who on earth would send a box like this in these times?
As your thoughts ran wild through a forest again, your hand slightly tilted the box, and the note fell out. You bent down to pick it up and immediately took note of the fact that it was paper which was used for royal decrees. A secret admirer from the ministry?
Unfortunately your mind was disappointed as you ran your eyes through the note.
Wear it for me princess. Love, Heeseung.
Of course. A secret admirer, what were you even thinking? No one would have the courage to give the princess of a foreign country, a pearl necklace.
Rolling your eyes, you settled the box and the necklace into a drawer and put the tiny note into a separate one. The prince had a handsome signature, far better than your scribbles anyway.
The western wing had never seemed like a more interesting place
"I hope you find the chambers a comfortable place my dear?" The Queen's voice rang in your ear. God the atmosphere of the dining table made your hands sweaty.
The little conversations you had with the King and Queen weren't enough conversation for you. It was too.....formal, to regal. You wanted fun, but you knew you wouldn't get that. Not until tonight atleast.
Your plan to sneak out into the western wing was extremely flawed but you had not a care in the world. So what if there would be hundreds of people standing guard? You were quick on your feet, a dancer's gift.
You had silently observed Heeseung throughout the dining session. He seemed quiet, all the talkative ones do at first glance. You noticed the way his foot tapped away every now and then without a care and his fingers drummed his fork in hand. You hadn't a single idea if it was on purpose or not. You had read in the book Gaeul once loaned you that artists, like painters or dancers, can never keep their body still. They always have to be doing something with their hands or feet. So either Heeseung was secretly a painter, or he was a dancer. The former seemed to have more possibilities but it could always be the latter considering Giselle's words about the western wing.
Only one way to find out.
Your skin was filled with goosebumps as you walked down the chilly corridor. You were greatly surprised that there weren't many guards, perhaps Tarnow cared less about security.
You shouldn't doing this, this is dangerous, said a voice in your mind, but did you ever listen to it? No, no you did not.
The western wing was easy to locate, what with the huge painting of a woman pointing her finger towards a large corridor, with the words "Western wing" engraved onto the painting. It was darker than the other parts of the castle, maybe it was a secret wing shut off to everyone else except the Prince. There weren't many doors here either, which caused you to let out a sigh of relief. The dancing room would be easier to find.
And it indeed was, as you now stood in front of a huge oak door, the only one for miles on end. You hoped fervently that it wouldn't creak like the door to your chambers. And to your relief, it thankfully didn't, and the spectacle inside made you let out a gasp.
The prince.
So he wasn't a painter after all.
He was a dancer!
A plain show of beauty, you thought, the Prince was. He looked ordinary at first glance, but now, as your eyes trailed his moving figure, his feet gracefully gliding across the floor, hitting each moment to the melodies of the song he was humming, you'd have thought it was Apollo's incarnate himself. You were mesmerized by him, by his every movement, he was gentler than a swan with his fingers, his robe moving in sync as if he had been commanding it.
My my, he looked like a groom in need of a bride, you thought. You didn't know whether it was past midnight yet, even as the clock struck itself and made a loud noise, you were too distracted by the dancing prince. You would have loved to watch him for a bit more, if not for-
CREAK!
Stupid door!
Heeseung's head whipped around to the door as his humming and dancing stopped abruptly. "Who's there?" He cried, clutching his hand to his sword belt, "Come out!"
There was only one idea in your mind at that moment.
Run.
You hoped fervently the next day that the bags under your eyes would be put off by everyone as exhaustion from the long journey. You hoped that no one thought "Oh the princess obviously must have sneaked out to the dance room and ogled the prince!" Although the possibility of that happening was very low.
You slyly avoided the Queen's questions about your sleep by asking her about when the royal potrait of the groom and bride to be would be painted. And she responded with much happiness that it was to be this afternoon!
This afternoon. With the prince. Wasn't that a joy?
Your schedule was much packed that day, which was disappointing since you had wanted to sneak out to see the main ballroom which Giselle had informed you was in the Northern wing. First, you had to get into your gown for the portrait, which would easily take the entire afternoon. Then the actual portrait session would arrive and God knows how much time a simple layer of paint will take to dry.
"Do you paint my darling?" The Queen asked. "Yes." You answered, knowing damn well you couldn't draw a line if you wanted to. Well a lie in a lie is a truth wasn't it?
Afternoon arrived and so did the sweat drops on your forehead. Damn this gown, you thought as you dragged the heavy on the floor. You decided the first thing you'd do after becoming Queen is ban whatever material this is.
Approaching the door where the Queen had directed you to, you took the handle in hand and tapped it thrice to let whoever was inside know that you had arrived. "Come in." A familiar princely voice answered.
Oh great.
"My Lord." You sunk into a curtsey, not letting your eyes meet Heeseung's. Had he always been this tall and handsome or were you dreaming?
"Heeseung, princess, call me Heeseung." He wore pride quite well in his cunning smirk, you thought, as you looked at him quintessentially.
"Then you may call me by my name as well." You replied, glancing behind him to see an easel propped up, "Where is the painter?"
"Oh him? He's always late." Heeseung leaned back against the table behind him, "So princess, enjoying the palace's attractions?"
"Stop calling me that." You said, rolling your eyes out of annoyance, "And if the attraction is you, then no I'm not." He made the word seem like an enchanting melody, the handsome bastard.
"Would you prefer darling?" He smirked, pushing the stray strands of hair out of his face again. He looked like a siren, pulling you into an ocean you wanted to escape from, but didn't know how.
"Say, my darling," he leaned forward, looking at you with darkened eyes, "You're still a virgin aren't you?"
"Why, do you want to corrupt me?" You scoffed, settling yourself down on the loveseat, "Well bad luck, I'm not."
Heeseung looked taken aback for a moment, his eyes widened and he blinked a few times, but he composed himself quickly.
"Ah we have a little liar do we?" He chuckled lowly, his eyes still looking you up and down, "So you're a bad girl aren't you?"
"I don't care Lee." You crossed your arms, "This is just a marriage for politics, there's no way in hell you are going to magically make me fall in love with you, like in the books."
"You read romance?" Heeseung cocked his head to the side, "Well there's a thing we have in common."
The door to the room burst open before you could get another retort out and you breathed a sigh of relief as the painter rushed in with his assistants and started running about arranging everything.
You were even more thankful when you had to sit down for the portrait, far away from Heeseung. Although a weird pose, you supposed the painter would magically make something out of it.
Heeseung was more interesting that you had previously thought. Atleast he didn't treat you with the insufferable respect most princes did. He was....cocky, rude, daring. A rather sweet taste on your tongue.
Oh how you couldn't wait to sneak out to the west wing again.
You remembered to bring a shawl this time, draping it around your shoulders so that the cold, carved rock of the palace wouldn't let your skin break. You cursed yourself for almost knocking over a piece of what looked like driftwood sitting atop a table, willing aways it's time. The kingdom of Tarnow really had its unusual traditions.
The conversation you had with Heeseung today ran in your mind over and over again and again. You liked the taste of him, the way he stood, the way he held himself. And the way he spoke. You were going to have to come up with new retorts everyday. Well that's more interesting than suffering a life of 'i love you' or 'i will die for you'.
But for now, peering at him through the slightly ajar door was more than enough. Oh how he danced, the movements he made, an astral ballet in the air. He looked at peace, that cocky and confident demeanor was no more, it was replaced, instead by calm and cool. Your eyes tried not to linger to his waist and arms, how his shirt pressed tightly against his muscles. The sinful thought of having a touch of them echoed through your mind. The curve of his body fascinated you, oh he looked as pretty as an angel. Perhaps there is more to Heeseung than you thought.
"She's interesting, too Interesting." Heeseung drawled, as he chewed on his quill tip. To his right sat Park Sunghoon, another crown prince, who had inherited his kingdom without marriage and without everything Heeseung despised. At the moment, he was the only one who could provide Heeseung some comfort.
"Interesting as in she didn't fawn over you or interesting as in she's no a virgin?"
"Both." Heeseung answered leaning back in his chair, "And she's such a mystery, god I want to know more about her."
"There is a thing called conversation you know." A third voice called from across the room. A red haired man was sitting atop the table, casually willing away at grapes.
Kim Sunoo. The youngest crown prince.
"Oh really?" Heeseung smirked, "I though conversation wasn't mandatory or what was it you said last time Sunoo? 'Conversation is only for the loveless?'."
"You know who I meant it for." Sunoo rolled his eyes and hopped off the table promptly, "Anyway the Princess of Witchelm seemed a lovely character. I had a brief incursion with her out in the garden, and she's.....interesting."
"That's what hyung said too." Sunghoon popped a grape in his mouth from the table, clenching his face at the sour taste, "Just run up to her and you know, ask her what she likes."
"Great advice, Sunghoon."
"As if you can do better."
The gardens of Tarnow were a place you reveled in. The freshly mown grass, the sweet scent of daffodils, and the sight of bees almost everywhere elated you. And most importantly, the willow tree.
The grandiose tree reminded you of someone who knew what they were worth, like a Queen who knows exactly what she wants. That's who you wanted to be. A Queen who rebelled, headstrong like your mother always told you to be. And you would fill the streets with dance, music and laughter. Maybe even prompt Heeseung to show off his moves....
"And to what do I owe this pleasure?"
Death would have been more pleasurable than to endure Heeseung right now, as his voice disrupted your peace and quiet.
"You owe your hand in marriage apparently." You stared straight at him, not daring to break eye contact, which was hard considering how menacing Heeseung's stare was.
"Admiring the willow eh princess?" Heeseung plopped down next to you, landing on the grass with a soft thump, "You know, I planted this when I was an adorable child."
"Adorable?" You scoffed, "More like a fiend." Heeseung chuckled at your statement, turning his head to look out towards the landscape.
"I planted most of the trees in this garden." He said, staring ahead with unwavering affection in his eyes at all the greenery, "They've grown a lot since then, my mother says that planting them at a young age allows them to grow with you." The love in his tone made you want to coo at him, but you composed yourself, remembering what kind of a person he was.
"Was that too cheesey?" Heeseung smiled, turning his eyes to yours. "Just a little." You responded, not having the heart to break the moment.
The silence that followed was a dire one, but it was peaceful. Heeseung and you sat in it as if you were fluent, letting the breeze whip your hair about, and the grass seep into your veins. You were so immersed in the butterfly landing on the daffodil that you didn't even notice the leaves sticking to your hair.
"Your hair looks like a bird's nest right now, princess." You heard Heeseung laugh as you turned your head towards him. "Excuse me?" You said, pulling your hand up to stroke your hair, being horrified when you pulled pieces of leaves sticking to it.
"Oh for fuck's sake." You mumbled under your breath, "Ah damn this, I'm going back to the chambers. Good day, Heeseung."
"With a nest in your hair?" Heeseung raised a cocky brow, "Princess, be logical. No one is going to respect a future Queen who looks like she's walked out of a jungle." Heeseung's words were mean but true, "You know I can just remove them, if you ask kindly with that pretty mouth of yours."
You had never wanted to slam his head into a wall more than now. But your reputation also mattered. You were torn between the two choices; Heeseung or risking your reputation?
"Fine." You sat back down on the ground, "Take them out."
"Nicer, princess. Add a pretty please too."
Oh he was on thin ice. You rolled your eyes and grumbled, "Could you please take these leaves out of my hair? Pretty please?"
The scent of Heeseung's neck pressed to your nose as he leaned over to remove the leaves carefully. He touched your hair rather gently, as if you were a fragile doll, which surprised you. Your hand kept lingering at his stomach, holding itself back from touching his muscles.
"There." Heeseung leant back, "All pretty princess again." "Thanks." You muttered, making your way to get up.
"Uh uh uh princess, we aren't done yet." Heeseung pulled you back down, making you snatch your hand away from him, "I want to strike a deal with you."
That night as you watched Heeseung dance gracefully on the stone floor, you wondered how this was the same person you had met in the morning. The same person who had made you a wretched deal, now danced under soft candlelight, unaware of his future bride watching him through clandestine corners.
"Meet me in my chambers tomorrow, and I'll think about not spilling to everyone, your little 'pureness' secret."
Fuck the world. That was your first thought as you woke up the next day, got dressed, had breakfast, had a conversation with the Queen, and made your way down to Heeseung's chambers.
For what purpose must this have been done? For what purpose did you have to be betrothed to a man like him?
"Fine day, isn't it princess?" Heeseung smirked at you from behind his desk. Papers and scrolls were strewn all over the desk, along with ink pots and a couple of what seemed to be drying paintings. A few more were hung up on the wall.
"Is this why your mother asked me if I paint?" You traced your finger over a dried painting of a daffodil. Still life, boring as it may be, still caught your eye. Heeseung smiled to himself.
"She asks everyone that, thinks her grandchildren will be some sort of prodigies." "Grandchildren?" You looked up from the painting to Heeseung's smug face, "We aren't even close to friends and she wants grandchildren?"
"Rule of Law princess, there's an entire book about it." Heeseung leaned back, spreading his legs a bit further, god that shirt stuck to his muscles well.
"What am I doing here anyway?" You scoffed, sitting back on the chair facing him, "You want me to do your assignments or something?"
"Assignments, actually." Before you could blink a huge stack of papers lay in front of you, all stamped with decrees, "And in return you'll get some get sex and your secret not being spilt."
"Good sex?" You laughed haughty, "I highly doubt that. Especially from you."
"You think I can't fuck you better than your lovers?" Heeseung raised a brow at you, leaning back against his desk. "No I don't think so." You simply replied, reaching out a hand to get one of the decrees, but it was caught by Heeseung and before you could even flinch, he had you pressed against the desk.
"Want to test that theory?"
Your retort stuck in your throat when you engaged in a searing kiss and your lips met aimlessly—a real mess of tongues and teeth. Heeseung licked a strip across your teeth and thrust his tongue deeper, exploring the inside of your mouth like a sacred temple with only one chance to visit. Heeseung opened his mouth and gasped, lingering with a few more short, honeyed kisses between his panting breaths and your muffled moans. You scolded yourself for even getting a sound out of yourself at Heeseung's touch.
Heeseung's hand moved up your thigh, and you pressed your mouth to his throat, sucking hard enough to leave a mark.
"That's not the ideal place to leave a mark princess." Heeseung glared at you, to which you merely shrugged your shoulders. So what if Heeseung had a few hickeys on display to the kingdom?
Heeseung's hand travels upto your back, easily removing the dainty dress you had on. You silently thanked Giselle for giving you a dress instead of a gown today.
“is this what you wanted?” you slid your panties to the side, as Heeseung was about to reach further down your slide. He wouldn't have admitted it but he almost drooled at the sight of you. Taking a second to admire you, his voice echoes through your body, “I wonder how many others can have you like this.”
"Not many." You keep your eyes on him, "none of them fuck me as well as I want them to."
You lean forward a bit, making sure he gets a fantastic view of your cleavage. You decide to push the boundaries a bit further, your voice dropping to a sultry tone, fingers playfully tracing the edge of your bra's strap.
Heeseung's exhales a shaky breath, "you're playing with fire, y'know that?" His voice is low, it only spurs the warning and longing lingering inside you.
The world narrows down to the heat of his touch, the electrifying sensation of his fingers on your skin. You feel the rapid beat of his heart against your chest, mirroring your own anticipation. Heeseung's eyes, lock onto yours, a silent agreement passing between you.
Your nails scrape against his scalp and you squeak in shock as Heeseung's hips surge upwards, forcing his hard cock against you. The unabashed moan he lets slip is sinful and it’s all you want to hear for the rest of your life. You can’t stop the urge building up inside you, you’re not even certain you can stop moving your hips even if you wanted to.
His fingers catch the waistband of your bottoms. Heeseung traces your clit over the fabric feeling the warm, wet patch you’re leaving in them and then he teasingly slips a finger underneath, swiping two fingers along your slit, thumb, and index finger opening your pussy to his gaze. He presses a finger inside of you, slowly stretching out your tight hole. You groan, and his eyes roll back at the way your walls stretch around him. You rock harder against him, fucking yourself into his finger and wrapping your arms around his neck again. you just want to feel him against you.
"Fuck you're a tight one." Heeseung smirks into the crook of your neck, taking in your delicious scent, "Is this good enough for you princess?"
His half-lidded eyes look up at you as you contort on top of him, feeling overstimulated, with a single finger. He coos, his other hand sweeping over the back of your head sweetly, pushing back stray sweaty hairs. He nudges your nose with his, hand on the back of your neck, and tries to meet your eye. The squelch as his finger fucks into you, fast and deep, is the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard.
You can feel the tightening of your stomach, your intestines begging for air as your mind wants nothing more but to break free. The sweet edge of release feels better than ever with Heeseung than anyone else you've ever done this with. Fuck was he good. Just as you felt his finger sweep across your cunt one more time, and hot liquid come upto your cervix-
"Heeseung!" You gasped, feeling the painful feeling of having him pull his finger away from you. His smirking face added the fuel to the fire of your anger, as he slowly bent away from you, collapsing onto a chair and spreading his legs far. God did you want yourself propped on that thigh.
"I already told you princess." Heeseung's smug voice infuriated you, "Sex as a reward remember? And you haven't done anything so no reward. Simple logic."
"fuck you" "When princess?"
You were thankful Heeseung didn't make you work all night, you had time to admire his dancing again. He seemed so different when he was alone, so much more gentler, and it only made you hate him more. Why all the cocky behaviour when he was surrounded by people? You liked this softer side of him. You wished that he would get the courage to show that side to the world. Maybe in due time as all things come.
The rest of the days went the same. Rise and shine in the morning, greet Giselle as she gave you your bath, breakfast and burrowings, rush off to Heeseung in his chambers, do your 'assigments' whilst glaring at Heeseung, who glared back, get the desk a bit messier than it had been, and then sneak off to the western wing at late night to watch Heeseung. It was a bit redundant, but you liked this. Maybe it was the fact that Heeseung was someone who made you cum properly (although you wouldn't admit it) or maybe it was the fact that, from the past few days, he had started opening up to your more.
Ignoring the fact that your time with each other consisted of making angry retorts, you noticed that now, you knew more about Heeseung than before. His friends, family, ancient history, his hobbies everything, from A to Z was in your memory now. And you had to admit that you liked knowing more about him.
His sunlit eyes everyday as they silently perked up at the sight of you, the way his mouth dropped to give you the daily retort along with a tiny compliment too, the way his smirks now turned into smiles, and the way he leant nonchalantly against the great willow, when you'd go out into the garden for a little rest. Was this the love the poets described?
"Good news princess." Heeseung strode into his chambers as you stretched your neck from sitting in the chair all day completing a decree, "We're having a ball."
Collapsing on his bed with a thump, Heeseung groaned as he stretched out his aching limbs. Jay really did always do a number on him in practice.
"A ball?" You questioned, rising from your seat, walking over to the bed and climbing on, "For us?" Heeseung looked at you and nodded. "It's supposed to be a pre-pre-pre wedding ball, according to mother dearest."
"Will there be dancing?" You asked excitedly. You hadn't danced in so long that your feet longed to be in some tap shoes and a big flowy gown again.
"Yep, and guess what?" Heeseung smiled at you, "We're going to dance together."
"Oh I am an amazing dancer." You bragged, raising your chin high, "So it's fine if I outshine you right?"
"Please, I am much better at dancing." Heeseung sat up, facing you, "It's fine princess, they'll notice you at the wedding if they don't at the ball."
"Dance for me then." You gave him a cheeky smile. Would he agree? This is what you had been wanting for a long time. "No." Heeseung merely said, checking his bitten nails.
"Are you that horrible of a dancer?" You chuckled. But before you had time to laugh more, a fluffy pillow landed straight on your face with force. Heeseung's smile had never been wider.
"Don't do that you bastard!" You cried, picking up a pillow and hitting his shoulder with it to which he laughed raucously. "Or what?" He laughed again, hitting you with the pillow repeatedly. Stray feathers let loose from the pillows but you had not a care in the world as Heeseung chased you around the room with the pillow clutched in his hand. This had been the most fun you've had in ages.
Young love? So refreshing for a narrator isn't it?
You looked stunning. Your reflection, clad in soft hues of your favourite colour stared back at you, as your eyes ran up and down your body, hugged tightly by the fabric.
The ball had came sooner than you had anticipated, maybe it was the fact that you were so excited for it.
You'd be dancing your heart out tonight. With Heeseung. How you had longed to match his movements for so long, and now you finally had the chance.
"How do I look?" You meekly asked Giselle, who looked like a jewel in her own gown. "Like a true Queen, my lady." She giggled, dipping into a tiny curtsy.
"Shall we move then?"
Heeseung hadn't been too excited about the ball. He had seen too many of them to be entertained by any. And plus, there wasn't a proper lady to dance with either. Where were you? His thoughts, which were running aloof, came to a halt as his eyes landed on someone descending from the staircase.
Was that....you?
Indeed it was, as he blinked his eyes a few times to get into his mind the fact that you, his bride to be, were walking down from the staircase, looking like someone he's always loved for centuries. That, he did, but of course he wouldn't tell you that. Your snarky remarks from time to time, the way you smiled at his retorts and the way you remained a complete mystery to him, no matter how much he found out about you. Love, love, love, was what Jay had told him.
"My lord." You dipped into a curtsey in front of Heeseung. God he smelled exactly like the willow, enchanting and sweetly poisoning. You tried your hardest to avert your eyes from the tightly hugging fabric around his arms and his belt too. You fervently wanted your hands to be tied to it.
"You look pretty, princess." Heeseung winked at you, wrapping an arm at your waist, but not before giving you a look of access, "May we?" He motioned towards the dance floor, where a few women and men had their arms wrapped around each other lovingly. Would Heeseung and you ever be like this, you thought, as he led you over to the marble floor. You would have liked that, you'd have liked that a lot.
You could feel the eyes on you as Heeseung took your hands to his lips and pressed a small peck there. "Ignore them." He smiled up at you, "Time to show off your dancing, princess."
Gulping down the breath you've had in for a long time, you gasped in silence as one of Heeseung's arms pressed against your waist in a position for your waltz. You took your breath in accordance with Heeseung as the violins whipped their bows and the grandiose music began.
Dance was often described as the art of the soul, you'd never seen a living example of it, until now, as your entire body and mind moved in synchronisation with Heeseung. It felt as if dancing on a cloud you've longed to be on, when you were swaying with him. His grip on yours, his eyes tracing yours, and his demeanor being the one of the swan you had spied on in the western wing, it enchanted you, pulled you in to the whirlpool of Heeseung himself. You could have stayed like this forever, swaying in a gown with Heeseung at your start.
Heeseung was intoxicated as well, it was sweet venom lacing his veins, as the clandestine rendezvous of your movements got him to the highest of highs, one that even the most addicted couldn't have reached.
"Enjoying the view?" You cocked a brow at him, noticing the way he was staring at you. You were thankful that a lot of other people had joined the dance and you weren't the only ones dancing now.
"Funny, I was about to ask the same thing." He smirked at you, his eyes tilting down to your cleavage.
"You've seen more than just my cleavage and it's still driving you crazy isn't it?" You raised your chin, "Pathetic, Heeseung."
"Pathetic is it princess?" Heeseung's voice dropped to a low, as he leant over to your ear, his breath hitting your cold skin, whispering words that made your breath drop.
"More pathetic than the western wing?"
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To be continued.....
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