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#how to write endings..

Lmaoooooo the only thing emptier than my wallet are my expectations for Halloween tomorrow

Man you KNOW your vent post is bad when you reach the limit number of tags

#AHAHAHAHA VENT TIME, #I’m too lazy to write this in a diary, #haven’t used that tag in a while!!!, #bough makeup today. finished my costume that i spent 200-300 dollars on, #fixed my wig and now my costume is SO MUCH BETTER THAN I ACTUALLY ANTICIPATED!!!!!, #I walked around campus tonight in my casual costume and felt so good!!!!, #and man imagine how I’m gonna feel tomorrow when I’m wearing ARMOUR THAT I SPENTBA MONTH MAKING!!!!! AND CAME OUT BEAUTIFULLY!!!!, #WELL GUESS FUCKING WHAT, #IN THE EVE OF HALLOWEEN MY UNIVERSITY IS SETTING IN NEW RESTRICTIONS SINCE OUR COVID CASES DOUBLED OVER THE PAST TWO WEEKS, #AND NOT ONLY THAT BUT ONE OF MY TEAMMATES ROOMATES TESTED POSITIVE FOR COVID, #SO IM GONNA BET MONEY THAT IM GONNA FET A CALL TO WUARENTINE MYSELF TOMORROW, #ON FUCKING HALLOWEEN, #I WASNT EVEN GONNA PARTY I JUST WANNA WALK AROUND CAMPUS AND TAKE PICTURES IN MY PERCY JACKSON COSTUME, #BUT I SWEAR TO GOD IF I CAN EVEN DO THAT, #I SWEAR IF MY MONTHS OF HARD WORK AND EMPTYING MY WALLET AND ANTICIPATION ALL LEADING UP TO TOMMORRIW, #END IN ME ISOLATIONG MYSELF AND NOT BEING ABLE TO LEAVE MY ROOM, #I....I DONT EVEN FUCKING KNOW WHAT IM GONNA DO TBH, #Literally this semester has been so hard and stressful and I can’t stop thinking about the election in less than a week, #Halloween was my anchor the past month and it’s my favorite holiday, #I just want this one day, #I just wanna walk around and pretend to be someone else with different problems for one day, #I worked so hard and spent so much money to make sure it was perfect, #I literally don’t know what I’m gonna do if that’s taken away just hours before the big payoff, #I’m not even joking I’m in live with my costume, #I struggled to think of something for months and when I finally decided on percy I was worried it’d be too simple or unreckognizable, #but it’s easily one of the best costumes I’ve made and it’s one of my favorites, #and I just...., #I don’t need this rn, #it’s weird how all of this mess could impact my grades since I NEED the labs to do my finals and I can’t reach them if I’m quarentine, #but no. it’s Halloween that’s currently making me cry in the club rn
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I think it was mainly because I was thinking about the “Brr Brr Brain Drink 1.0” from our coffee menu 🤩

I’ve created a whole fix-it AU for endgame in the past and started on a fic for it too. I will write a fanfic of your fanfic if I must 🤧🤧 I AM WAY TOO INVESTED IN IWAIZUMI/READER

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i may or may not be writing henry stickmin fanfiction like a fucking beast right now and while there’s a very solid possibility that it’s not getting shared i felt like you all needed to know that i am writing more than i have in years ((and that i am in fact alive i just keep forgetting i have a tumblr that needs to be posted on))

#the henry stickmin collection, #wink wonk i am going insane and charles stole my narrative at one point but hey it eez what it eez i wrote so much, #only reason i am not currently still writing is because I've hit a wall and have no idea how to tie this oneshot up with a neat little bow, #ive written myself into a corner with my desire to have all the information and all the context, #also spoilers possibly but i had to watch the valiant hero ending to get accurate dialogue and it legitimately felt like id been punched, #it felt like id been punched in the fucking chest like exactly that feeling, #i had to watch my boy Explode™ three fucking times to confirm exact wording because im a perfectionist and a fool, #and i am ouchie, #but again eez what it eez, #and like i said charles highjacked my narrative so i feel better a little bit because he's apparently having a blast currently, #pun NOT intended holy shit that was awful i can hear whichever manifestation of charles that stole my narrative cackling from the beyond, #anyways while charles is thriving henry is about to very much have a breakdown so theres that, #sorry henry i promise in all my other aus youre thriving, #**cartoony cheek smooch** there all better now no hard feelings, #oh my god i actually just typed that. ive gone completely off the deep end. ive lost my mind, #WAIT its like 7 and ive been up since 4 that explains so much actually, #pay no mind to my ramblings i am just in the villainous clutches of exhaustion which is always determined to make me look like a fool
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🌈 Did you have imaginary friends when you were a kid?

I actually didn’t! But I would normally think a lot to myself when alone and think up possible scenarios and just be off in my own world

No imaginary friend tho, unfortunately, I think young me missed out on something really cool

🍀 Do you have any good luck charms or amulets?


Okayokayokay!! When I was younger I went to this Wiccan store that was filled with such amazing things (sadly it’s not around anymore but I still think about it) and I found this stone and my gosh is it a good ass stone!! I got this lol stone years ago and I forget what kind it is but it’s what I kept in my pocket during tests and exams in High School!! I’d rub it for good luck and it would also help my social anxiety and gave me a reason to smile! I mean nowadays I wear a lil piece of a stag horn on a necklace all the time to quell my anxiety but I occasionally hold my lil stone for memories!!


It has a very smooth side and a cracked side which is SO nice to the touch!! It is a beautiful lil stone!!! My lucky stone!!

🌻 Share a random fact about yourself

Okay anon you had me battle with myself to choose something interesting about me, and I don’t find myself interesting but here’s a fact I guess?

Back in primary school I had a best friend called Erin and me and her were connected at the hip like our birthdays were a week apart and we would share birthday parties and everything! We were SUPER close, always spending time together and everything, like I mean Close! And to celebrate our birthdays one year our mums decided to get us a matching ty beanie baby and beanie buddy plush set each in light of their dog Maisie! I still have the beanie baby named after that dog!! (The original ty is called Fitz but we don’t mention that)

She’s a very well loved toy and I’ve had her for at least 12 years!!

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I hate trying to figure out if i should skip a chapter i had planned but I thought maybe it would help to do the ugliest sketched graph ever to compare the intensity of all the chapters. Alas i just makes me notice how much chapter 6 dips down even tho it doesn’t (to me) feel out of place in the grand scheme of things bc both chap 5 and chap 7 are p high action and chap 6 is an emotional regrouping.

Anyway i might just nix chapter 9 bc i realized 1000 words into my outline of it that it doesn’t serve a purpose, at least not right now.

But I also don’t want to go from the emotional vulnerability in chapter 8 to the emotional vulnerability in chapter 10 without a break.

Also I still have no fucking clue how chapter 11 aka the final big chapter with the climax and everything is going to play out. At all! No clue! None.

So anyway writing is bullshit

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🥺begin again by taylor swift featuring self ship with terushima yuuji pLS DJNDND i **** this man so much it’s not funny anymore i barely even know him gAHHHHH

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Spoilers (no details, just a precaution) for Baghdad Waltz from Dreadnought 

I think I just made a mistake. I actually needed to study for two exams tomorrow and I was searching for ways to procrastinate and I saw this post about a fic. I got curious and I checked it out. It’s late, I shouldn’t have done it. It just got finished, if someone’s interested: Baghdad Waltz from Dreadnought. 

I read the last two chapters and the comment section from the epilogue and I do not know how I’m gonna be able to sleep tonight. It’s a monster of a fic, 680k and very heavy (extremely heavy) on the angst and apparently it’s very good in portraying realism (oh, and it doesn’t have a happy ending). The comments praise it to high heaven and I believe them, and I also believe them when they say they don’t think they can get themselves to reread it again because the ending was so heartbreaking and so inevitable and the journey painful as all hell. 

Some of the readers have been following it’s journey for three years. It’s apparently the kind of story that could make it big if the author ever changed the names. Win prizes, get a heart-shattering movie, etc, etc. 

I really don’t want to miss out on the story, but I am also in no way emotionally ready to commit to a 680k fic that will rip my heart out at the end.

Just wanted to get some thoughts out there, because I need to settle some if I want to study some more. It’s fucking 2 am, got an exam at 8:30. I am nowhere near done with studying, oh my fucking god.

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The shoes are hot, and even though they fit well they are unpleasant. I stand in the ballroom, dressed in the baby blue suit that the queen of hearts gave me. I have been continuously shocked by her kindness, but at the moment all I want is out of these shoes. Out of this ballroom.

I circle around the room carefully, trying very hard not to catch anyone’s attention. The doors were left open for this event, but I can still feel my heart rate quicken as I wander through them. The sparkling lights in the palace make my eyes ache, and the shoes are quiet against the checkered floor.

When I push open the small door into the garden, I release a heavy sigh. The evening air is cool. The sounds of the garden are much quieter than those of the ballroom. I can properly hear and enjoy the sound of music out here. The music in the ballroom is muffled, but I can hear something deeper in the garden singing.

I reach up and untie my tie, undo my top button. I take deep breaths, looking down at the stone pathway I’m standing on. It leads all through the garden. I bite my lip, starting down it.

I walk down the path until I reach a more open space, a section of garden that is full of benches and rose bushes. These roses do not sing, but I can hear flowing water from a fountain in the center of them. It is beautiful.

When I sit down on a bench next to the fountain, I lean down and finally take off my shoes and socks. It is a relief to feel the rough stone pathway with bare feet. It is cool, and it is grounding. I know this event is important to the game, but I just can’t stand that ballroom. I just can’t stand these shoes.

So I sit and I focus on the cool air and the stones. I rock myself, and I listen to the flower’s beautiful singing. It feels so much better. I can breathe so much easier. My eyes fill up with tears, and I let them flow.

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Callisto flipping through so many emotions, quickly and constantly. She’s a wheel in a slot machine, spinning so fast you have the impression of forms, you can vaguely make out the possibilities, but you never know where it’s going land and what you’re going to get.

Gabrielle, a seething pit of hatred, boiling over and not caring if the only thing she can burn is herself, she can’t even TRY to know where to begin to process all the things she’s feeling about Callisto. It’s no wonder, really, that Gabrielle embraced pacifism so hard, and how ultimately doomed it was for her.

And then Xena, her eyes flicking back and forth between the two of them. The threat to Gabrielle is closing in on all sides, including from Gabrielle herself. Leading me to what may be my favourite bit:



Xena’s talked Gabrielle into going this far, and it speaks volumes for both of them that they got here without a hell of a lot of drama. There’s nothing Xena can say now, though. These are Gabrielle’s issues, this is Gabrielle’s fight. Xena can be, and will be, on-hand to make sure it doesn’t go too far, but she can’t tell Gabby how to come to terms with this. This confrontation between these two is long overdue, and Xena knows from intense personal experience that the only way out is through. So she sits, and watches, and trusts Gabrielle to figure it out, and stays ready to catch her if she starts to fall.

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