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mindmeltonabun-blog · 3 years

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Doom At Your Service: Analysis & Theories for EPs 7-8

Welcome back to another edition of analyses and theories time with me! I’m going to try and keep this post as short and as simple as possible. In case I don’t, I apologize in advance! Also, sorry if this post is filled with grammar mistakes and confusing syntax...I'm writing/editing this late at night and my ADHD meds have lost their effectiveness.

Anyways Eps 7-8 was pretty awesome and I’m glad that a bunch of my previous theories had come true! For those who wonder how I come up with some of these theories, I just look at everything whether it be big or small. I also try to look for connections and patterns. At the same time, I try to understand the motivations of characters and what is the big picture the writer is trying to paint. Once you're able to do all of that then you can predict where the story is going. This is how for the most part I was able to predict the events and endings of shows like TOTNT and TKEM. Anyhow, let’s get down to analyzing and theorizing! Turn on those thinking caps!

What the Rock Balancing Structure Represents

Rock balancing is a form of art that involves a person placing a combination of rocks in an arrangement. To achieve balance of the rocks, one must be very patient and compassionate. In its completion, the structure represents that while things may appear impossible, they are actually possible. So what seems impossible, but can actually be possible? Hmmm probably Myul Mang learning what it means to be human and ending up becoming human. Notice that both the rock art is next to the plant and the story of Pinocchio? It's saying saying that the impossible can be possible. It's possible for Myul Mang to be able to learn what it means to be a human so that the impossible can happen...he can "grow" up to becoming a real human.

The whole rock balancing structure could also signify that in order to grow, one must overcome one's deepest fears. I don't know about you all, but stacking rocks is a scary thing especially since at any moment the whole thing could fall over. Anyways, if you remembered, Myul Mang had been searching everywhere for Dong Kyung and feeling like one of his worst fears (Dong Kyung not existing) had came true. It's only when he goes to Dora's hospital room and sees both the Pinocchio book and rock structure that he got Dora's lesson. And that's why afterwards you didn't see Myul Mang going on another search for Dong Kyung somewhere else.

A brief digression. I’ve seen multiple people theorizing that the plant and the butterfly represent Dong Kyung and Myul Mang respectively. To them I say, did you just completely miss the part where Dora says the plant is Myul Mang? Myul Mang is both the butterfly and the plant. For those who still don’t see that, let me break it down.

First, what do butterflies symbolize? They symbolize metamorphosis, death, and rebirth. Myul Mang is not a literal butterfly, but he will eventually be one in a metaphorical sense. If anything, Myul Mang right now is like a caterpillar on the verge of entering the cocoon stage that is followed by a reemergence as a butterfly aka human. You can also look at it this way, Pinocchio is a butterfly too. Why? Well, look at what happens to Pinocchio. He is reborn as a real boy after having gone through metamorphosis (puppet -> real boy).

Now let’s examine the plant symbolism. What do plants represent in DAYS? They represent humans. What is Dora growing? A human Myul Mang..DUH!! Sorry, but I didn’t think it was that hard of a concept to grasp especially since Dora has already explicitly said what she is growing in that one scene. For Myul Mang to grow up to become a "good" human, he needs to learn to think about others, forgive himself, be compassionate (not only towards himself, but others as well), love others, etc. Other things Myul Mang would probably need to learn is how to love his fate or amor fati (loving your fate means loving it all, not just the good parts, but the bad parts too; loving it so much so that you would never want to change anything about it and would gladly relive your life the way it was over and over again for all of eternity).

I don’t think the "plant" will fully "blossom" until Myul Mang sacrifices himself to save Dong Kyung for the sole reason that he loves her (in contrast to sacrificing himself for his own personal gain). Therefore, that's probably the final lesson -- how to be completely selfless.

Dora just wants her son to grow up to be a "good" plant (human) so she doesn't have to end up pulling him out aka end him before he even becomes human! Okay???

Sorry if what I've just said was confusing. What I meant to say is that Myul Mang's personal growth is reflective in the plant's growth. The more he learns of what it means to be a "good" human, the more the plant will grow until it blossoms into a beautiful flower (a real human).

If we want to connect the idea of personal growth to the story of Pinocchio, we see that Pinocchio's growth occurs only after he experiences pain (physical and emotional) and love. From these experiences, he learns what it means to be a "good" boy and is rewarded by the Fairy transforming him into a real boy.

One Wish or Wishes?

In my previous post, I had briefly touched upon how I think Dong Kyung is going to wish for brain cancer to be cured. Though I still think this, I nevertheless want to explore some of the other possibilities of what her wish could be.

Potential Wishes:

1) Myul Mang to Become Human

2) More Wishes

3) Contract to be Voided

4) No One Remembering Her After She Dies

For #1, Dong Kyung wishes Myul Mang to become human, but then she still dies from her untreated brain cancer…so nope. For #2 and #3, are these wishes even allowed? I would like to point out some flaws of the writer. Maybe it’s not so much a flaw, but an annoyance I have with the writer of DAYS. What one can or cannot wish for is not explicitly stated. Due to this, it is somewhat difficult for me to accurately predict what Dong Kyung will wish for. It’s like trying to detect a substance without being given its upper and lower limits or range of detection (sorry for the science related analogy) ! For #4, I guess this one could be probable, but there is just too much evidence pointing to Myul Mang's death. After exploring each of the possibilities, I'm still left thinking that Dong Kyung's one wish will be to cure her cancer.

Anyways, even if Dong Kyung wishes for her brain cancer to be cured, it’s not really a happy ending since Myul Mang still dies. Is there any other way for Dong Kyung to make another wish so that she can save Myul Mang? I think there is and it comes in the form of the “gift” that Dora gave Dong Kyung. In my previous post, I had theorized that the marble may have a larger purpose than just being a symbol of how the fate of the world is Dong Kyung hands. I believe now that the marble’s larger purpose is that it is a type of wish fulfilling stone. Why? Because we know fantasy dramas typically make references to mythology. In this case, the writer of DAYS is probably referencing Hindu mythology.

In Hindu mythology there are 3 main gods:

1) Brahma: The Creator

2) Vishnu: The Preserver

3) Shiva: The Destroyer (Sounds like Myul Mang right? Also, the love story between Shiva and Parvati is somewhat similar to that of Myul Mang and Dong Kyung’s love story.)

Dora is the equivalent to the god Vishnu in Hindu mythology. Vishnu is often depicted wearing a “Cintamani”, a type of wish fulling stone analogous to the Philosopher’s Stone (hint hint…transforms something from one form into another…immortal -> human) in Western mythology. Given this, the marble/Cintamani in Dong Kyung's possession could be the key to Myul Mang’s rebirth.

Some might ask, “Well why can’t Dora just use it to wish for her son to be reborn as a human?”. Well, remember that both Dora and Myul Mang are slaves to the wishes of humans. They themselves cannot fulfil their own wishes or desires. Meaning, even though Dora and Myul Mang can wish for something to happen, they cannot carry it out unless humans wish it too. Also, as I mentioned previously, deities in kdramas never just give humans gift because they’re being nice. Rather, they give gifts to humans so that humans can help them accomplish their overall goals/wishes.

So putting it all together, do you see where I’m going with this? Dora has the same wish as Dong Kyung which is for Myul Mang to live, but Dora is unable to execute her goals/wishes unless Dong Kyung wishes it too. Dora knows that Dong Kyung will probably use her one wish to cure her brain cancer. At the same time, this leaves her son, Myul Mang, to die. Therefore, Dora gives Dong Kyung the wish fulfilling marble with the intention that Dong Kyung will use it to wish for her son, Myul Mang, to be reborn as a human. With Dora/Dong Kyung’s wish, Myul Mang will be free from his cursed life as an immortal and be reborn to be able to live happily with Dong Kyung.

Side note, the rebirth of Myul Mang into a human can either be dependent on Myul Mang's personal growth or it can be dependent on this wish fulfilling stone or both! I'm leaning more towards his personal growth as being the catalyst for his rebirth, but who knows! It very well could be that the marble has a role to play in his rebirth.

Is Dong Kyung Going To Be An Immortal?

No…no…and NO!!

Some might ask why don’t I think this? Well, for a bunch of reasons. I’ll admit I used to think that it would be very romantic for a human to become immortal so that they can be with their immortal lover forever. However, the more I thought about it, I came to the realization the notion of forever is not romantic nor beautiful. At its core, the concept of eternity is quite terrifying and ugly. And if you haven’t realized already, the writer of DAYS has been making multiple arguments against immortality. For anything to have meaning, it must have an end. In this sense, the end is beautiful.

To get my point across, I want you to try and think about some things. What keeps life meaningful? Experiences? People? Well, imagine doing something you love for a year. Now imagine doing it for trillions or zillions of years. Experiences no matter how good they are at first will eventually become tedious if you do it for long enough. For example, eating your favorite dish may be good for a while, but not for zillions of years. At one point or another, you ultimately lose your desire to want to eat it or eat entirely for that matter.

Now surely getting to know people and loving them can keep your life meaningful right? Well, how many times do you think you could handle knowing and loving people who eventually disappear? Eventually, you grow tired of crying and mourning over dead loved ones that you become numb. Now imagine being Dong Kyung. She would have to witness her family, their family, and so forth dying over and over again for all of eternity. Doesn’t that seem tortuous? Sure, one could argue that at least she has Myul Mang with her, but do you really think her love for him could sustain her forever? The relationship between Myul Mang and his mother, Dora, is a prime example of how a loving relationship could turn sour over a great deal of time. The gift of immorality Dora bestowed on Myul Mang became a curse instead of a blessing. So why would Myul Mang want to give Dong Kyung something that was basically a curse for him? As for Dora, she probably wouldn’t want to give Dong Kyung the same gift after seeing what it did to her son.

If you continue to think that Dong Kyung will become an immortal being, did you really smell what the writer of DAYS was cooking or did you just smell what you were cooking?

The Bad Case of the Riddles

From what I have been reading on multiple platforms now, it would seem that a lot of people are rather confused about a lot of things. It’s understandable! Throughout the show, the writer has presented some complex philosophical concepts that may be difficult for some viewers to grasp. To further add to the confusion, the characters at times do speak in what appears to be riddles. This I believe may be one of the major flaws of the writer. She has to consider that her audience are probably people who have never read any philosophical works before. Most viewers aren’t here to decipher cryptic messages or see how they’re connected to some major philosophical concepts such as eternal recurrence, existentialism, nihilism, amor fati, etc. Most are here to shut off their tired brain and enjoy some good fantasy romance! I know I’m totally one of those people!

Needless to say, I did find myself in a debate of whether I should discuss some philosophical concepts referenced in the show as to help you all gain a better sense of understanding. However, I concluded that it would take too much of my time to do so. Additionally, despite my best efforts to use the simplest of words, I found that whatever I had already written may have still been confusing to the everyday reader. Anyways, if there are any particular scenes or dialogue you all want to me go over, please feel free to use the ask button and I’ll do my best to try and answer them!

Whats Going to Happen Next?

Probably more filler type stuff aka more bs. It's common in kdramas for characters to go back and forth on their initial decision of whatever. Dong Kyung is going to break up with Myul Mang because she loves him and doesn't want him to die. And before the breakup, she's going to give him some good memories to remember her by. Following this, she's going to try and love herself so that she's the one that ends up dying and her wish is going to be for everyone to forget her? Okay......Zzzzzzz!! Idk... Dora is probably going to intervene somehow to get Dong Kyung and Myul Mang back together again.

Other Random Thoughts

What I think would be interesting to learn about is the connection between Dong Kyung's parents death and Dora past self's death. It wasn't just all a coincidence that they both died on the same day. Who knows... maybe Dong Kyung was meant to be in the car that day with her parents, but Dora's past self sacrificed herself to change Dong Kyung's fate.

Also, I still don't think Dong Kyung is going to die, I mean you got her brother praying to the deities that she lives!

Okay, I'm done. I wrote this in Microsoft Word and it was 5 pages long. My brain is dead. There's probably something I should've gone over or elaborated more about, but oh well. Thanks for reading this disjointed post!

#doom at your service #doomatyourservice #myulmang #myul mang #tak dong kyung #takdongkyung #park bo young #parkboyoung #seo in guk #seoinguk #pinocchio #DAYS #theories #my brain is melting

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collecting-stories · 4 years

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The Arrival - Ep. 01 - JJ Maybank

Summary: The pogues (and Sarah) decide to get away from the Outer Banks for senior week though Sarah’s suggestion that they spend the vacation with a friend of hers doesn’t sit well with JJ, who just wanted a week away with friends. Though his opinion of the situation may change his expectation that nothing will go according to plan is truer than they could have hoped.

A/N: This is a ‘they’re just regular teens and there was no gold hunt’ AU. This will be a 5 part story.

The S’week Masterlist | Outer Banks Masterlist

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“No.” JJ shook his head, “no, no, absolutely not.”

“Why not?” Sarah asked, looking back at her boyfriend for support. John B quickly looked away, staring out at the marsh in order to avoid the conversation.

“Why not? Because I’m not spending senior week with a bunch of fucking kooks while they prance around like their in some MTV reality show!” JJ stresses, voice raised. He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it stuck up all over the place.

“It might not be so bad,” Kie cut in, regretting it almost immediately when JJ looked over at her, “you said yourself that we’ve done senior week here...let’s do ours somewhere else?”

“Sure. Wherever you want as long as it’s not a trip to kookland.”

“You are so dramatic, oh my god JJ. Last time I checked you weren’t exactly rolling in it. How do you propose we pay for a week down the beach?” Sarah pointed out.

“You got money.”

“You shouldn’t even be going! It’s not like you fucking graduated, this is senior week. For graduating seniors.” Sarah waved her hand to indicate her, John B, Kiara, and Pope.

“Screw you!”

“Guys!” Pope finally intervened, pushing his best friend back, “okay, let’s cool down.”

“Can we please just go to the keys? I’m sick of wasting my time arguing. If we’re going we need to leave tomorrow morning...early.” Sarah said, looking pointedly at JJ.

“Hey, I’m always on time!”

Despite his protests JJ was exactly where he said he’d be on Friday morning at 5:30a. Sitting outside John B’s house, on time and with his bag packed for Florida. He was the first one to arrive, followed by Kiara who’d almost been early if it wasn’t for the half hour argument she’d gotten into with her mom for leaving the week after graduation. As if that wasn’t ritual.

JJ said nothing, unusually quite and still completely pissed that everyone had been so on board with Sarah’s plan to spend Senior Week in Florida with some friend at their grandparents’ vacation home. He wanted a chill holiday, just the four of them (five because John B couldn’t be separated from Sarah) spending every day on the beach. He didn’t want some kook vacation laying around a pool drinking vodka in crystal light and talking about ‘daddy’s credit card’ and whatever dumb shit else they did on their weekends.

With the Twinkie packed to exploding with teenagers and luggage John B took the first leg of the drive south. JJ spent the trip sitting behind the passenger’s seat, rolling blunts in his lap and ignoring his friends excitement for senior week. When Kiara nudged his leg halfway to Florida and he looked over she smiled sympathetically at him.

“It might be a good week.” Kiara tried to sound reassuring, knowing that it was JJ’s idea to go away in the first place and that they had in fact hijacked his plans, “at least the change of scenery will be nice?”

“So far the only good thing about this trip is not being home for a week.” JJ replied, refocusing on his task. He would definitely murder one of them if he didn’t spend the week at least somewhat buzzed. If you asked anyone in the obx they’d tell you that JJ was laid back and chill, a go-with-the-flow, weed smoking, kid who would probably never grow out of his ‘it is what it is’ phase. But that wasn’t JJ at all. Sure, he could hit up a kegger at the drop of a hat but he liked a plan and he liked the plan to consider him as an important factor. Not just another nameless sidekick to John B’s summer. And so far, that’s exactly what this senior week was shaping up to become.

“It’ll be fine dude.” Pope said, voice low so he wouldn’t draw anyone else’s attention in the van.

JJ looked up at him and frowned before nodding. What else could he do but nod and pretend that he agreed with anything that Pope said. They were already halfway to Florida and no one cared about his opinion.

Sometime after that JJ fell asleep, Kiara taking the same case of blunts from his lap and folding everything up into his backpack. By the time Pope pulled the Twinkie into the horseshoe driveway of a house bigger than Tannyhill, JJ had woken up again, rubbing his eyes as he looked out the window.

“This is the shit I was talking about.” He said.

Sarah whipped around, hair flying against her shoulders as she glared at him, “for god sake JJ, can you have a good fucking time? Please.”

John B made a face, pleading with his best friend to chill. All he wanted was a stress free vacation and the fact that Sarah’s friend was willing to let them stay aided his ability to relax. If only it would aid JJ’s.

You were standing outside on the steps when the bus pulled up, engine cutting in the middle of the horseshoe. Kiara recognized you from school and Pope recognised you from running groceries for his dad. Sarah pulled the door open and jumped out, throwing her arms around your shoulders.

“Oh my god, you have no idea how much I missed you.” Sarah said, pulling away, “I’m literally gonna kill everyone, starting with JJ.”

“That makes two of us princess.” JJ remarked, glaring at her as he climbed out of bus.

“Hey,” Kiara called, drawing attention away from JJ and Sarah, “thanks for having us.”

“Trust me I was just happy to tell Scarlett that her and Kelce couldn’t stay here.” You replied, looking over at JJ, “I’d much rather spend my senior week with you guys.”

“Flattered.”

“Hey, you’ve never had to sit around listening to Topper talk about workouts.” You replied, feeling unusually proud of yourself when JJ cracked a smile.

“Oh come on, you can’t just do a bench press without the proper preparation,” JJ joked, imitating Topper’s ‘bro’ dialect.

You laughed and nodded, following him to the trunk to help them unload packs. “Hey Pope, my mom said you got that scholarship you were going for?” You mentioned as you grabbed Sarah’s bag.

“I did yeah,” he smiled, surprised that you knew or remembered anything about it. He definitely considered you better than some of the other kooks on the island but that didn’t make you friends with him. You were just someone he delivered groceries to every once in a while.

Once the bus was unpacked you led the group inside, beginning the tour of the house. You lived on Figure Eight in the Outer Banks and you had a house as nice as or better than the Camerons’ but this house was even nicer than that. Your grandparents had old money and they had used it to retire to the Florida Keys where they really only spent the winter months.

“There are four guest bedrooms, you can divy them up however you want to, I’m this bedroom,” you pointed to the closed door behind you at the end of the hall. “The master is off limits, it’s my grandparents and they’ll murder all of you before JJ even gets the chance if you step foot in their room.” You instructed, looking over to JJ as you spoke. He smiled.

“How’ll they know?” He asked, looking down the hall toward the double doors of the master bedroom. This house could fit four of his inside of it. He shifted his weight as he looked around the hallway, the art on the wall looked like something he would have seen on a field trip to a museum, ugly and old but a clear representation of their wealth.

“There’s a camera in their room.”

“Kinky.”

“Ew, oh my god JJ!” You practically gagged, causing him to laugh as Sarah scrunched up her face at the thought of your grandparents using the camera for anything more than G rated. “Moving on!” You continued through the whole house until you’d looped back around, reminding them again that the beach let out right behind the patio.

Once the tour was over you pulled Sarah away from John B, telling her that you needed to talk to her alone. And truthfully, you did. You hadn’t been lying when you told her that you had turned Kelce and Scarlett away for the week. Kelce had texted you days before Sarah and asked about ‘all of us’ getting together for senior week at your grandparents. You knew what ‘all of us’ meant. Him, Scarlett, Topper, and (despite having graduated two years earlier), Rafe. If Sarah was still hanging out with them she would’ve been there too. That was the senior week Scarlett had always planned for but there wasn’t anything you wanted less in life than spending time with all your least favorite people.

While everyone else unpacked you led Sarah into the kitchen, “so, I told you Kelce had texted me about them doing senior week here?”

“Yeah, but they’re not...”

“No,” you shook your head, “no I told them I had a full house. But they are here.”

“What do you mean here?”

“I mean they rented a place down the street. Like we can see their house from this house. Topper texted me this morning before you guys got here.” You fished your phone out of your pocket and showed Sarah the text that Topper had sent along with the picture of you out on your deck.

“Bit stalkerish.”

“Sarah, not the point.”

“Look, it’s fine,” she replied, trying to play off that maybe she actually believed that it was fine, “they can do their thing and we’ll do ours.”

“Yeah, that would totally be fine. Except your brother is here too.”

Sarah groaned, “fuck.”

“What’s the matter?”

You and Sarah turned to find John B and JJ coming into the kitchen, the latter going straight for the fridge and pulling out one of the beers that you had bought before they came down. You watched as he popped the cap off on the counter and took a long gulp, head tilted back. Sarah smacked your arm to get your attention and both of the boys turned to look at her too.

“Topper told me that he’s here for senior week. Him, Scarlett, Kelce...Rafe.”

“Oh cool...cool, awesome...so, the kook fucking vacation I said I didn’t want.” JJ replied, grip tightening around the beer bottle. Sarah rolled her eyes.

“It’s fine. It’s not like we have to see them.” John B replied, trying to ease his friend’s mood. He didn’t need this argument to flare up again. JJ had only just started to relax and the last thing John B wanted was for him to be in a shitty mood all week.

“Except we always do. It’s fucking like...what’s the word?”

“Kismet?” You asked, pulling yourself up to sit on the counter as Kiara and Pope joined the small gathering.

“What’s kismet?” Kiara asked, shaking her head when John B offered her a beer.

“Topper and” Sarah waved her hand as if to indicate the rest of the group, “them are here.”

“What is kismet?” JJ asked, leaning toward you.

“It means fate or destiny.”

“Yes, that’s exactly what it is. It’s my destiny to have the shittest fucking time imaginable because we all had to agree to Sarah’s kook vacation.”

“What is that, your vocabulary word for the day? I’m sorry that I didn’t envision senior week as us sitting around together in a dumpster motel with a bunch of other pogues trying to pretend that we’re not still in the Outer Banks. How dare I fucking plan an actual good vacation that you, oh that’s right, don’t have to pay for!”

“Guys,” Pope stressed the word as he stepped between Sarah and JJ, “can we please just focus on having a good time?”

“I’d have an awesome time if I was anywhere but here!” JJ shoved passed Pope and headed out the sliding glass doors toward the beach leaving the five of you to stand in the kitchen awkwardly.

“So...” Kiara began, looking around at the group, “so Topper is here?”

“Topper, Kelce, Scarlett-”

“She’s a bitch.” Sarah cut in.

“-and Rafe.”

“Isn’t your brother a little too old to be partying on senior week?” Pope asked, looking toward Sarah. Rafe was at least two years into college by now, there was no way he should’ve been hanging around a bunch of high school kids. “Didn’t he already have a senior week?”

“He’ll probably go on senior week with Wheezie too.” You joked, “anything to party.”

“Honestly.” Sarah agreed. She had a feeling her brother’s intention was for more than just partying. If Kelce had planned to stay with you than it was obvious why Rafe was even coming down in the first place though she wasn’t about to say anything to anyone right now. Kiara, she assumed, knew that you had broken up with Rafe over spring break but she doubted that it was common island knowledge that you had been dating him at all.

Pope suggested that it was a good idea to leave JJ be, that he’d eventually cool down and come inside on his own, especially once he realized that he had no means to get back to North Carolina. He either came in and accepted that this was the vacation they were getting or he camped out on the beach, either way he was stuck in Florida for the week. Still, you couldn’t help feeling guilty that he was having a shitty time. When Sarah had asked if she could stay with you for the week you had stressed whether it was okay with her friends or not.

That guilty feeling was completely, so you said, the reason for heading down the beach to find JJ. “I did ask Sarah if it was cool with you guys...coming down here. I know it’s not exactly what you had in mind.” You offered as you sat beside JJ on the beach. In another hour the sun would be completely gone from the sky, the oranges and pinks in the horizon hinting at the coming night.

“I feel like I should be bitching to a confessional about how much I can’t stand Sarah right now.” He replied.

“I mean, you could try it?” You teased, moving so your back was to the water and you were facing him, “alright JJ, tell us what’s got you so upset and try to include a tragic story from your past.”

JJ cracked a smile, meeting you eyes as he put on his best reality show sob voice, “I’m just like, really pissed at Sarah and it totally reminds me of the summer my turtle died.”

You couldn’t help the burst of laughter as you fell back into the sand. JJ joined in, sour mood getting shelved for another day. He honestly didn’t hate the view or being near a beach, or the incredibly comfortable mattress that he had in the room he had claimed for himself. He was even hesitant to complain about you. Not quite the stuck-up kook that he expected, you’d been welcoming to them since the Twinkie first pulled into your driveway.

“If it’s Top and them you aren’t thrilled about I don’t blame you. I was definitely looking forward to a drama free week and I feel like that might have just become unattainable. But, we’ll avoid them best we can and focus on other stuff.” You said, trying to ease his upset.

“Other stuff like?”

“Other stuff like, I got invited to a party down the beach tonight...if you wanna go?” You asked, “I mean who can be sad when they’re drunk?”

“John B...never let him talk to you when he’s drunk.” JJ replied. He stood up and offered you his hand to grab.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You said, texting Sarah that you were headed down to a party with JJ.

The party wasn’t far away and groups of people had already gathered despite it still being early in the night. People who had just shifted from lounging on the beach to the beginnings of what would become a party. It was still in the transition between disjointed groups sunbathing and people getting drunk as you and JJ walked up. He was quiet as you walked through people trying to find somewhere to set yourselves up.

You weren’t sure if Sarah would really show up with everyone or if she was so peeved with JJ’s attitude that she’d stay away for the night. You kept an eye out for any sign of Topper or anyone else in his group, hoping to avoid them for as long as possible. Maybe the whole week if you were truly lucky.

Beach parties in the keys were not as good as the boneyard parties you were used to but it would have to do for tonight. A little less chill and relaxed, people seemed to be forcing the good time as opposed to just letting it happen. The chill vibe that you felt like it should’ve had was non-existent but you weren’t entirely sure that wasn’t just you projecting. Maybe everyone else was already having a good time and you were trying too hard already for the sake of the boy trailing behind you. People had coolers sitting around with different seltzers, hard lemonades, seagrams, and locos but not a plain beer in sight. JJ complained about the missing keg and you tried to make up for it by offering him a peach Jack Daniels. You took a can of something called Unicorn Swirl, bypassing other people on the beach to sit up on the lifeguard’s deck.

“This is disgusting, by the way.” JJ mentioned as he took a drink, face screwing up at the overtly sweet taste of the peach. He downed another gulp quickly, trying to trick his brain into not realizing the taste and only getting the alcohol.

“You’ll be hard pressed to find a keg here.”

“So what I’m hearing is, even the parties are shit?”

“Not total shit-” you paused to take a sip of your drink, JJ laughing as you almost spit it out. “Oh my god, that’s disgusting!” You gagged at the after taste, holding the 16oz can out for JJ to take, “try it.”

“You just spit it out and you want me to try it?”

“Just...you have to experience it...I can’t even describe that taste.” You replied, taking the peach from him to wash down the taste. “It doesn’t even have a flavor.”

JJ kicked it back, tilting his head and gulping. The sugary taste of whatever flavor they intended it to be made him gag worse than you had and he leaned all the way forward, spitting most of it back out onto the sand. “Holy shit! That is the worst fucking thing I’ve ever had in my life!” He exclaimed, “it tastes like fucking medicine! Why did you make me drink that?”

“I didn’t make you.” You insisted, taking a sip from his peach.

“You literally held it in my face and told me I ‘had to experience it’. How is that not making me?”

“Yeah but I told you it was gross before you drank it so you already knew that.”

“I can’t believe you brought me to a beach party with nothing to drink.” He replied, taking another, smaller sip from the can and pulling a face as he made himself swallow.

“Why are you still drinking that?”

“Trying to get drunk enough that this whole vacation doesn’t suck.” He shrugged.

“Hey!” You reached over and smacked his arm, “the whole thing doesn’t suck! I’m super cool, what’re you talking about!”

“Except you brought me to this party so...not as cool as you think you are.” He took another sip and gagged again, “god I have to stop drinking this.”

“Come on,” you put your peach down and grabbed the unicorn from his hand to abandon that on the lifeguard stand as well, “I know there’s a distributor around here...lets get some real beer.”

“Sounds good to me, anything but this.” JJ replied, following you away from the crowd of people on the beach.

Taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife @freckled-and-daydreaming @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @howdyherron @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @tragicmisfits @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @belledutchess @poguelifeeee @jjsthumbring @faded-blue @parkerpetertingle @thebookwormlife @summer-clouds-and-long-days @jellyfishbeansontoast @minigranger @louisolos @hoewkeye @love-someone-special @finecelle @vitaminekabc @tiredfeels @g4bster @strangerthanfanfiction713 @the-only-nana @tomzfrog @mozz-are-lla @vindictive-hearts @poguestyleskye @ssprayberrythings @pensysto @jenahbell @beautyandthebleh @lavenderxraindrops @gothackedalready @teenwaywardasgardian @thelonewolfdies @hvitost @haha-fuck-you-thot @stillbelieve398-5 @rewindlr @queenniccimicci @kissessforharryyy @thedarkqueenofavalon @alytavzla @bqmblebee @linniep @nerdypartytrashpsychic @xxchxrryxx @spencer-reid-is-a-cutie @mirjanak @kwjune @danielladreaming @obx-saltlife @youngestxhearts @spnobsessedmemes @jolomez @timotaychalabae @babycakes00 @wowitswondergurl @siwiecola @regev1408 @celestialmaybank @mybnkjj @averagxfangirl @mysterious-adventurer @justawilddreamerchild @rhyetaylor62 @calm-rejects @99sxuxii @oh-annaa @katiaw2 @aiifandomsunite @thatjohnd @pixelated-pogues @booksandshish @lopineapples

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sharkselfies · 3 years

Note

this is kind of a weird question, but do you happen to know of anywhere i might find shots of the terror’s sick bay? looking for refs but i don’t follow too many terror blogs

BOY DO I EVER!! not a weird question at all! thank you for asking and for your patience while i wrote all this stuff in response. you probably know some of it already, but i wanted to try to be as thorough as possible.

cinemaqua, the hungarian water park that bought the ship set after filming ended, uploaded a bunch of high quality photos with the sets relatively in tact. there is one very good one of the sickbay:

check out those little shelves with railings so the bottles don't fall off if they're sailing in rough waters (or being crushed and shifted by the pack ice).

i know you asked about terror's sickbay specifically; however, as this behind the scenes video mentions, they just used the one set for both ships, so technically terror and erebus's sickbays are the same place. however, the set designers did change a few details here and there to make them look different--the erebus scenes are a bit fancier than the terror ones, swapping out curtains for real doors, looking a bit less weather beaten, etc. (semi-relatedly, did you know erebus, even though she's the flagship and is larger, is the younger ship? terror was ordered in 1812 completed in 1813, while erebus was ordered in 1823, laid down in '24, and launched in '26. so it does make sense she might look a bit more modern!)

there are 2 good detail shots of sickbay set dressing in that video:

anyway, this is the part that took me so long to get back to you on--making a list of all the scenes that take place in each ship's sickbay (which ended up accidentally turning into a partial rewatch and list of all the scenes with the doctors). we actually see terror's sickbay less frequently than erebus's (since goodsir and stanley, both stationed on erebus, are more major characters than are mcdonald and peddie on terror), at least at first. we don't get our first glimpse into the terror sickbay until episode four! but once we've seen it, we spend a LOT of time there.

the best episodes to rewatch to take your own terror sickbay screencaps would be episodes 4 and 5, then! (the best ep for erebus sickbay screencaps would def be episode 1 since you basically get shots from every angle with the combo of david young's initial exam + the hallucination at the foot of his bed.)

here are some of my own caps from 5 that show off the background details of terror's sickbay really well so you can get a good sense of where things are!

notice how they even moved all the lanterns to one side of the room for blanky's amputation at the end of the episode?

speaking of lanterns, you may find it useful to brighten your screencaps if you can, because this show is SO dark sometimes. a brightened screencap on twitter was what helped me first notice there were anatomical diagrams on terror's sickbay walls! you can see those clearly behind goodsir when he's telling macca abt the lead line on morfin's gums in 4 and behind crozier veeery briefly and blurrily during blanky's amputation in 5.

(stanley has one on the wall of his cabin as well when goodsir's telling him about the lead poisoning in ep 6, i believe. it's not 100% clear where this scene takes place since it's quite focused on their faces and not the backgrounds so much, but i think it's in his room)

finally, when i don't feel like doing an actual rewatch or digging through a mountain of screenshots for references, i'll just go browse the stephen stanley or alexander m(a)cdonald tags, since they tend to have most of their scenes in their respective sickbays and the gifsets made by creators there can be a great help for slowing things down and observing! def follow theterroramc if you want to follow some more terror blogs too, because they curate everything and have a really comprehensive tagging system!

thank you again for your question and i hope this long winded reply was helpful for you! anyone else feel free to chime in with more details in the replies or reblogs as well.

#the terror #personal #anon #ask #long post #sorry this got away from me and got SO long #i hope this helped and if not uhhh just rewatch eps 4 and 5!!#many good scenes in those eps to figure out where things are if you can bring yourself to pull your eyes away from the incredible acting!#but it would be super useful to have like. a floorplan from above of the rooms.#if one does not exist already i wonder if i could draw one up...#my spatial reasoning is poor tho so i may not be the best one for the task #but i could certainly try!#maybe in the morning #it is well past my bedtime now #actually it IS morning now. rip

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fizzingwizard · 4 years

Text

I’m having trouble deciding how to place my crappy screen shots this week because ep 9 gave me the Taichi spam episode of my dreams xD

So, I guess feast your eyes on my favorite boy...

... I mean, you can’t have too much of that determined face, can ya? Haha. And he does it so well.

Well, I was prepared for a episode that was just a cool battle, but we actually did get more than just that. Or, I guess I should say, there was more layered over the battle so it didn’t feel like fighting for the sake of fighting. We still got character development. I love it.

My only criticism for this week is that, consequently, we got very little of the other characters. BUT, what we did get of them was not nothing either, so I’m gonna squee over that as well.

I mentioned some time ago, but also, THE MUSIC IN THIS SHOW, it’s really good. Very epic, very adventure. It kicks the tone up up UP.

More below!

We pick up where we left off last ep, with Taichi “translating” the digicode. Still no indication of whether the others are so linguistically blessed as well. But Taichi, for reasons unknown, can’t translate the entire passage. He basically learns enough to understand that the holy Digimon is trapped by the “dark” and in trouble, and they have to go find it, but after that he says he can’t read any more.

Sora: I told you to pay more attention at school.

Taichi: What school are you thinking of, spy school?!?

It will be interesting to find out why that is and it points to someone pulling the strings behind the curtain. Someone who’s made the kids their champion. Are they a benevolent being? The kids don’t doubt it so far. An old cabbage like me can’t help but look sidelong...

Jou panics over how they’re going to find the holy digimon without knowing where it is, to which Mimi responds that they do know.

Jou: Mimi-kun, you know where it is?

Mimi: Somewhere on this continent.

Jou: T_T Mimiiiiiiii-kunnnn

Taichi of course is raring to go, map or no map.

I mean I did warn you I only capped Taichi this ep...

They are interrupted by Ogremon, who we saw previously talking with Devimon, but when he arrives his motivation does not seem concerned with his master’s plans. He goes straight for Taichi, reflecting on their previous encounter, when Greymon broke Ogremon’s horn.

So here’s what I loved. Ogremon’s working for Devimon, of his free will or not we don’t really know, but regardless, Ogremon is still Ogremon, and like in old Adventure, he stakes a lot in his pride. Last time it was focused solely on fighting Leomon. This time, the kids initially think he goes after Greymon for revenge, but as their fight heats up the other kids notice that something seems different about this fight. Mimi even says “It looks like they’re having fun.”

Like, it’s not just a battle. It’s already done some foundational work for Ogremon becoming their ally in the future. And it’s begun with Taichi this time. Ogremon’s special relationship was Mimi in 99, as well as Jou, and there’s plenty of time for that to turn out in 20 as well, but I think it’s super interesting that they’ve begun it with Taichi.

It’s like a samurai film. (Mimi - again - even says “It’s like a movie.” She got a lot of good lines this ep lol) The two strong, brave rivals who respect each other’s strength and value each other’s pride. And it’s a trope we see in... basically every shonen anime ever made. And it’s really fitting for Taichi.

Yamato has very few lines in this episode. Like I said before, this is very much Taichi’s ep, and the others are mainly just watching, which is a bit of a bummer but also rather hopeful for the show as a whole because even though they’re watching, we learn things about them. The other characters make quips and comments while watching the fight. Yamato is noticeably silent, but every time something significant happens, we get a close up of his face. He gets more closeups and of longer duration than the others. It’s clearly meant to tell us Yamato’s taking this all in and watching so closely. Maybe he’s watching in case he needs to jump in, or maybe he’s simply learning all he can for the future. Whatever the reason, this is definitely an important character trait for Yamato.

All of a sudden a bunch of other Digimon launch an attack, and the kids can’t get out of the way in time. Taichi makes this face:

Similar to the expression he had last week when they were grossly outnumbered and about to lose, if Yamato hadn’t saved their butts. I think this expression’s going to become a Thing as well. It’s the face he makes when he wants to panic, but won’t let himself.

This week Yamato can’t save them because he also needs saving! So who’s our mysterious ally?

That’s right it’s KOOOOOSHIROOOOOO!!!!!! *air horn sounds*

The sheer joy (and relief!) in Taichi’s voice when he sees Koushirou almost makes up for his not being around much in several eps. I’m still a bit disappointed that his return didn’t involve that much fanfare, but getting to save everyone from being blown up is nothing to sneeze at.

Tentomon is hilarious and, like Sakamoto Chika said in yesterday’s Digifes, an “even weirder” old guy than ever xD

The others immediately run over to say hi or introduce themselves to Koushirou and Jou’s quick to inform him that he, Jou, is the leader.

Mimi: Uh really? Since when?

The very manly battle continues to rage.

Yeah I don’t really got much to say, it’s a battle, they’re having fun, becoming rivals, it’s male bonding through physical competition and mutual respect...

I wonder if Ogremon’s got an inferiority complex because Greymon’s got three big horns and Ogremon only has one and a half x’D

The manly battle is rudely interrupted by a FREAKING MISSILE.

Look, doesn’t this land right on them? ISN’T IT LITERALLY RIGHT OVER THEIR HEADS!?!?! Why aren’t they burnt to a crisp! I know it’s a kids show but come on!

The missile was launched by MetalTyrannomon, who is as scary as he is brainless.

The Pokemon fan in me was immediately like “fire!! Palmon get out of here you’re a plant type! Eh Gomamon you’ll be fine”

The kids immediately know something’s changed. The battle of male bonding is over. War is here. The missile was probably a good indicator of that.

Devimon isn’t what one would call subtle.

Ogremon quickly calls it like it is: “So I’ve been abandoned, eh.” Devimon’s gonna kill the kids and he doesn’t care about Ogremon’s pride. He doesn’t care about it so much...

... that he doesn’t mind MetalTyrannomon STOMPING on Ogremon and CRUSHING him into the ground

Taichi’s like WTH!?!?! we were doing some male bonding!! that shit’s sacred!!!

Ogremon: M’fine... jus’ another day for ol’ Ogremon... ghhhhh.... mommy...

So Taichi has a pretty strong reaction to watching Ogremon get literally stomped on. Not that I blame him, but it’s not like they know Ogremon well or anything. Taichi just feels through their battle that Ogremon, well, he doesn’t deserve this anyway. I guess. He has been trying to kill them for a while though. But Taichi’s got his own samurai side and he can’t let injustice stand.

He’s so worked up, the animators were afraid showing us his whole face could cause distress.

His strong sense of justice fuels his courage!

Which in turn gives Greymon an epic power boost like Yamato’s feelings of friendship did for him last episode!

Aaaaand... it’s not very effective!

Because MetalTyrannomon is a level higher, even with a power boost Greymon can’t do more than dent him.

One thing that stands out is, the Digimon don’t seem to have the same issue with needing to fuel up between battles as in 99 Adventure. We’ve seen them pleading for food a couple times yeah, but when they’re fighting they don’t seem to reach their limit quite as fast. This episode, Tentomon didn’t join in the fight because he’s exhausted from flying as Kabuterimon for such a long time before even saving the kids. Agumon doesn’t run out of juice until he tries to take on MetalTyrannomon. But it took both of them quite some time to get to that point and we don’t see anyone stop to fuel up again between scenes.

The contrast with the Ogremon battle makes the MetalTyrannomon one that much scarier. This is the third time in two episodes that Taichi’s on the brink of panic. The third time he’d have lost the game, if someone didn’t come to the rescue.

And this time that rescue comes from a surprising (not surprising?) corner.

Ogremon stands back up... and has uhhh apparently lost his eyeball??? x’D I know he got crushed but like, did his eyeball pop out of his socket and roll away? Like "on top of spaghetti all covered with cheese” style???

Anyway, Ogremon must be kind of sick of losing body parts, because it’s pretty obvious at this point that he’s going to Die by sacrificing himself. Par for the course for Ogremon. He can’t admit to caring, but if he can rationalize it as “I’m getting revenge!” or something he will jump right in. And, given the rate this show’s being going, I guess it’s no surprise we’d see a borderline touching death this early on.

Ogremon also directs Taichi to where the holy Digimon is, making him seem not very like Devimon’s ally at all. Apparently the holy Digimon is “straight ahead.” Some actual directions might be nice but uh.

Taichi however is not too on board with this dying-for-you junk. You can see how conflicted he is. (Well, not in a screenshot, but he’s like shaking.)

Yamato continues to looking on silentl, quivering with rage as much as Taichi, just from the back. I will not be surprised at all if this Greymon-Ogremon battle is something of a prelude for conflicts between Taichi and Yamato in the future.

Ogremon gathers his remaining strength and attacks MetalTyrannomon with everything he’s got, and does indeed seem to disintegrate in the style of dying Digimon. However, that doesn’t mean this will be the last time we see him. I think he’ll come back maybe even more brainwashed on Devimon’s side, perhaps fused again, or maybe not - but I do think we’ll see him again sooner rather than later.

Then all the kids are blinded and Sora groans that she knew she forgot something at the store, freaking sunglasses.

A really fun episode! Was not really expecting much from an episode that was focused on a battle, but it does not fall into the boring trap of just doing cool stuff for the sake of doing it. Though it’s disappointing Yamato was so quiet, it has a sense of a pot slowly heating to a boil. It’s a pregnant pause. And Jou and Mimi were their hilarious selves, how I missed them. Sora and Koushirou had the least to do, but at least Koushirou got to save the day.

Next week it looks like MetalTyrannomon was not defeated by Ogremon, who may have been passionate but was still a level below, so we get to fight some more...

There are no showers in the digital world.

Koushirou gets to show off his Usefulness with this Useful map, which will clearly cause a lot of frowns since it shows that they can only go left or right, even though Ogremon told them to go “straight ahead.” Hmm. What will they do? I’m kind of expecting Taichi to insist on going straight anyway. I hope we don’t split up again already.

Also next week marks the return of the MISSILE NIPPLES!!!

I hadn’t expected another evolution this early on but I mean we did already get a jogress.... so I suppose it’s no surprise. Also MISSILE NIPPLES!!!

#digimon adventure 2020 #digimon psi #fizz watches digimon 2020 #digimon #psi spoilers

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newmusickarl · 3 years

Video

youtube

Album & EP Recommendations

Another absolutely stacked week for new music so no single Album of the Week, instead five records and five tracks all well worth your time. My suggestion would be to simply pick the ones that sound intriguing and dive right in – here’s what’s good...

Swimming Static by Elder Island

June is here, the sun is out (in the UK at least) which means summer has officially arrived. As if on cue, Bristol-based indie electronic outfit Elder Island have this week released their incredible sophomore effort, Swimming Static - and already it is an early contender for the soundtrack to the summer.

Opening on a whisper of atmospheric strings and synths on Embers, it is hard to not get immediately pulled into the sonic wonderment the trio present. From that point on it is simply great track after great track, from the infectious pulse of Purely Educational, the magical neon glow of Small Plastic Heart, the bass-driven growl of Feral to the bluesy, soulful groove of closer Late at Night. I will also say it is a more synth-pop experience to their debut, but you can also evidently hear how their sound and craftmanship has been honed since their first effort too.

There are also two standout tracks here for me, the first being the mightily catchy Sacred, with its classic dance beat and hypnotic chorus. A brilliant track that will have you singing, dancing and then hitting the repeat button to do it all again. The next is the album’s centrepiece, Queen of Kings, that begins with a string-tinged medieval melody, which wouldn’t sound out of place as the backdrop to an episode of Game of Thrones. That is until the track quickly evolves, suddenly transforming into a futuristic club banger. It makes for quite a mesmerising contrast and a dazzling moment right at the heart of the record.

All in all, this album is simply all killer and no filler and one I can see myself returning to constantly over the coming months. If the sunshine is getting you in the mood for a dance, then I honestly can’t recommend this album enough.

Cavalcade by Black Midi

However, if this weather is instead making you want to strap on your headphones and settle in for a weird and wonderful experience on a long walk instead, then look no further than Black Midi’s Cavalcade. Coming off the back of their highly acclaimed, Mercury Prize-nominated debut Schlagenheim, the pressure was certainly on the experimental London rock outfit to deliver big with their follow up. My experience with that record, I certainly enjoyed parts of their debut but could never really get invested in it to the same degree that I know other people did. Cavalcade, however, is quite a different story.

Here Black Midi return at their experimental, genre-defying best, but at the same time everything here feels more calculated and considered – dare I say it, more refined. To be clear though, this is not a cohesive listen – the band still erratically jump between fascinating elements of jazz as well as math, prog and art-rock. But that is not a negative point, that is very much a big part of this album’s charm.

From the tense stuttering strings of opener John L, to the early-Wild Beasts theatrics of Marlene Dietrich and Chondromalacia Patella, to the psychedelic shoegaze of Diamond Stuff, Black Midi absolutely revel in the chaos that they paint here. The album eventually draws to a triumphant close, with the waltzing magnificence of the 10-minute epic Ascending Forth, by the end of which you’ll be hard pressed to not be completely blown away.

Overall, Midi objectively set a high standard with their debut, but this expressionist masterpiece means they have somehow still exceeded expectations. Schlagenheim was easy to admire but hard to love, this time around with Cavalcade, for me at least, Midi achieves both admiration and adoration.

Nobody Is Not Loved by Solomun

Outside of these two year-best records, electronic artist Solomun also released his wonderful guest-laden new record this week. Whilst Jamie Foxx on soulful opener Ocean and Tom Smith from Editors singing through a vocoder on closer Night Travel provide two of the highlights, it is arguably Solomun on his own for euphoric single Home that offers the best moment of the entire record.

Life’s A Beach by Easy Life

It would be easy to sell R&B outfit Easy Life as the UK’s answer to Mac Miller, but that would be a disservice. Bursting with originality and natural charm, this chilled-out, slickly smooth record sees the Leicester group take elements of hip-hop, pop and even jazz to forge what it is quite an enchanting debut from start to finish.

Reprise by Moby

And finally on the albums front this week, dance legend Moby teams up with the likes of Gregory Porter, Jim James, Mark Lanegan, Kris Kristofferson, Skylar Grey, Mindy Jones and more, for some beautiful, orchestral reimagined versions of his classic hits. Somehow the likes of Natural Blues and Porcelain sound even more majestic.

Tracks of the Week

People, Let’s Dance by Public Service Broadcasting

It has been a huge week for tracks this week too, with musical historians Public Service Broadcasting the pick of the bunch, dropping what is easily one of the best songs of the year thus far.

Their next album, Bright Magic, will see the band explore Berlin’s musical history, with this first taster the perfect introduction to the timeless sound of that city. A fusion of Depeche Mode, Kraftwerk and Giorgio Moroder, with a smattering of David Bowie to top it off, this is a song that manages to feel both warmly familiar and gloriously refreshing at the same time. To top it off, they also released the perfect video accompaniment featuring some brightly coloured roller skaters doing some synchronised dancing on a pier – linked above for you to watch for yourself.

How Not To Drown by CHVRCHES & Robert Smith

A collaboration that just feels oddly right, the Scottish trio team up with The Cure legend for a moody, atmospheric, synth-soaked belter of a track. Although incredible right the way through, the spine-tingling moment comes during the song’s outro thanks to the ghostly vocals of Smith being cast over some hauntingly melodic guitars. Absolutely stunning.

Catch You On The Way Back In by Spector

Having already treated us this year to their fantastic compilation record Non-Fiction, Spector have now announced plans for their fourth album Now or Whenever due for release in October. The first taste of this new record features some wonderfully buzzy guitars and an earworm chorus that you’ll struggle to not stop singing in your head for hours after listening.

Midnight by Creeper

Southampton-based goth rockers Creeper have also dropped the brilliant first taste of their forthcoming EP American Noir, which is a typically theatrical ballad that’s wonderfully capped off by a soaring guitar solo in the track’s second half.

Lost Cause by Billie Eilish

And finally this week, Billie released her latest single from forthcoming album Happier Than Ever, a bluesy, understated break-up anthem that sees her tear into her undoubtedly regretful ex-boyfriend.

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lovely-complexx · 6 years

Text

“If you play with fire,”

Against all odds, I’ve written fanfiction??

This scenario came to me while playing ep.2 and I decided to write it on a (very self-indulgent) whim. It takes place in the near future in MCL University Life. I hope you like it!

MC/Nathaniel - 2K words - Angsty? - Mention of fist-fights, blood, bruises, and alcohol.

------------------------------------------------------------

“I can’t leave you like this.” She says, equal parts worried and irritated. She hopes the latter is the one that comes through in her voice, though.

It’s already some kind of miracle that he isn’t in need of being hospitalized after getting in a fight against a bunch of scoundrels. He shouldn’t be testing his luck by just laying on an alley, bloody, beaten, and drunk off his ass.

“You can, and you should.” Nathaniel’s words are a little slurred. “We stopped dating years ago, you don’t owe me anything.”

There’s an irritability in his voice during that last sentence she doesn’t care much for. But she shakes it off and tries again.

“Actually, maybe I do. You did help me out the first night I got here. Remember?” She reminds him “How did you put it then? ‘The two of us aren’t strangers’?” She says, with a bad impression he would have probably complained about if he was sober.

“You’re still so stubborn.” Is all he answers, and she takes it as compliance.

It takes much of her strength to get him back up on his feet, but Candy gets Nathaniel propped up and leaning on her. The closer she stands to him, the harder it is to ignore how much he smells like booze. Up close, his face looks even worse. She is going to have to at least get him patched up before she can get him in a taxi.

They start walking towards the driveway. After the scene Nathaniel and his little friends had caused, the bar was certainly not going to let them back in, even if it’s just to ask for their first aid kit. Candy sighs as she thinks of her next move. Right then, by the end of the block on the opposite side of the street, she sees a diner has its light on. With a bit of a struggle they make their way towards it.

They walk into the diner, Nathaniel keeps an arm over her shoulders as she helps him walk up to a chair. The place is grimy, but it’s easy to pretend not to notice in the poor lighting. There’s just a couple of white lights illuminating the metal chairs and tables, and on the other end of the room there’s a counter that’s just barely brighter. Candy makes her way up to it, but there’s not a soul in sight inside the place.

“Hello?” She shouts, hoping for someone back in the kitchen to hear her.

“You should just leave it. This is pointless.” Nathaniel says from his place behind her.

“Excuse me!” She shouts again, ignoring him.

The door to the kitchen opens then, and a woman shows up. Her white apron is stained in several places, and her ponytail has begun to fall apart; the whole look gives off an air of upmost weariness. She looks at Candy with an uninterested -almost bothered- look in her face.

“If you want to order food, it will take a while.” She greets them.

“Um, no,” Candy says. “Actually, I was hoping I could borrow your first aid kit, please.”

She is met with silence and another blank look from the stranger, who glances briefly at Nathaniel and then back at her. Candy, feeling at the end of her rope, offers her a pleading look. The lady sighs.

“Hold on, let me see if we have one.” She says, going back to where she came from.

A few minutes pass by, Candy goes to rest her hands on the counter, but looking at it, back-tracks and folds her arms instead. Nathaniel lets out a breath.

“I’m going home.” He says as he stands up, visibly unstable.

In that moment, the woman shows up again carrying a little white box. She hands it to Candy, who barely manages to thank her, before she wordlessly disappears again.

“Sit.” Candy orders the boy.

He obeys but lets out a complaining scoff as he plops down on the silver chair again.

Their kit isn’t particularly astounding, but she can make do. Inside there’s some distilled water, a thermometer, a couple pain-killers, antiseptic cream, and some band-aids, bandages, and such. Candy takes the box to the table Nathaniel is sitting next-to and pulls up a chair in front of him.

“Let me see your hands.” She says as she sits and takes the cap off the antiseptic cream.

She doubts it will help much but puts some of it on his hands and spreads it as she checks for broken bones. She tentatively presses in different spots and checks his reaction. He doesn’t flinch; in fact, he is a lot more serious and quieter than she expected him to be.

Slowly, she works her way down his long fingers, one at a time; his hands warm under her touch. Still no reaction. His knuckles look terrible but there doesn’t seem to be any fractures.

“Okay, now let’s clean up your face.” She moves on.

While there are no cotton balls to be found, Candy locates a little piece of fabric, much like a thin handkerchief, which looks old but clean. She pours some of the distillated water on it and begins dabbing it on his face. Yet, extending her hand to his face from where she sits is a bit awkward, given she is kind of far and he is taller than her.

Candy gets up and moves so she is standing in the space between Nathaniel’s open legs. She bends down a little and hesitates for a second before cupping his face with her free hand. She looks at him.

His face is a wreck, but from the mess of it all, amber eyes look at her with undivided attention. He is still serious, and his eyes are slightly bloodshot, but his sight holds her still for a moment. Blood rushes to her cheeks. In some weird way, it feels almost like déjà vu.

Nathaniel finally looks away and she regains her focus. Candy clears her throat and gets back to analyzing his face. There are crimson splotches on his cheeks and close to his mouth, she notices spots of purple and green around his collar-bone, they most likely also spread elsewhere, concealed under his clothes. Candy’s heart sinks at the sight of bruises; they bring back memories, the kind of memories neither would like to remember…

With one hand placed softly on the side of his face, and the other one holding the dampened rag, she cautiously keeps on cleaning up his complexion.

At one point, her thumb ends up laying on his neck, and she can feel his pulse. His heart seems to be beating quite fast; and while the room is technically silent, Candy could swear she hears the beating in her head... She ignores the possibility that could be her own heart.

The only actual sound disrupting the silence are Nathaniel’s quiet groans when she rubs the fabric over the cuts near his left eye. With her mind wandering, she had been a little rougher than she intended.

“Sorry.” She apologizes.

Feeling his eyes on her again, she continues to dab away delicately, concentrating in the pressure she puts on it.

By the time she reaches his forehead, she is basically done. But like an impulse she can’t control, Candy moves away Nathaniel’s bangs (even though they weren’t in the way) and he briefly closes his eyes. The whole gesture is all too familiar, and it fills her with a rush of something she can’t quite place. So bittersweet. Wholesome and lonely at the same time. She brushes his hair away again. Once she realizes what she’s doing, it feels so indulgent, she gets self-conscious and quickly goes back to rubbing his skin.

The fabric ends up dirty, with bloody stains all over; Candy takes it into her other hand. Before putting it away for good, she thoroughly looks at him one last time; to make sure she didn’t miss anything important. She eventually ends up looking into his eyes again.

His eyes seemed the same as they did back in the day, but looking at him now: wasted, angry, wild; it’s just so difficult to picture who he used to be. And what really bothers her about the situation is she just doesn’t understand. The ignorance to his motives, to the suffering that might have gotten him here…when giving it more than a second of thought, it drove her mad. She hated it.

With her brow furrowed and still holding his gaze, she subconsciously cups his face with both of her hands again. Letting him see her worried was something she had wanted to avoid, but she couldn’t help it anymore.

His response is instantaneous; he places a hand on top of hers, keeping it in place, just in case. He closes his heavy eyes for a moment.

“Thanks” He whispers. Almost an echo of the boy she knew. Nath squeezes her hand, then takes his away.

That makes Candy mellow a little. However, her slight frown continues to betray her worry.

She is about to pull away and put an end to the whole thing (that has already gone too far); when while retrieving her right hand, she stops at the scar on his lip. Looks at the rest of his busted face, and back at his eyes.

She doesn’t understand.

Against her better judgement, she goes for it. She needs to know.

“Nathaniel, what happened?” She asks.

For a fraction of a second, his eyes open wide. But then he looks down, and she can no longer see his expression. They spend a minute in silence, until, he scoffs.

“What happened?” He repeats her question.

The boy brushes back his hair, and she half-expects another vague answer, but when he sits straight again, there’s a dejected half-smile on his face. His eyes are more earnest than she had ever seen them. He looks up at her, and when he speaks, he sounds completely sober.

“You broke my heart.”

The words are soft, and while he speaks them clearly, they feel broken.

Candy’s heart throbs as she hears his voice replaying in her head. Every time they echo, it all feels more contracted. Seeing the look in his face is so close to destroying her…

But something clicks inside her. And then it feels like actual heart-shattering pain.

“I broke your heart?” She says in disbelief. “I broke your heart!?”

Nathaniel sad eyes don’t leave, but he backs up.

“How dare you?” She isn’t screaming, but her words are powerful, and the diner is quiet.

He is lost. Speechless.

“Do you think I wanted to leave?” Her voice breaks a bit, but she ignores it. “Do you think, do you really think, I wasn’t devastated?”

The memories of all those nights and days spent in bed because it all hurt too much come like flashes and make her eyes burn. She covers her face.

“Like it didn’t take me ages to get over you?” Candy thinks back to them meeting after all those years, and how it had hit her like a slap in the face, going through the heartbreak all over again at the sight of him.

Everything burns. Her eyes, her throat, her chest. She had tried so hard to ignore all of this, and now it was pouring out, unstoppable.

“You don’t get to blame this-” She motions in his general direction. “on me. You don’t get to act like the only one who suffered. Like I didn’t care.”

Knuckles turn white as she digs her fingernails on her palms, her hands in fists now. And yet, she doesn’t dare to look directly at him.

“When all I did was care.” It had taken every bit of her not to cry up to this point, but she could feel it coming. Her voice lowers, as to not give herself away. “When even now, I still-“

She cuts herself off, she won’t say it. He doesn’t get to know. She shouldn’t even feel it in the first place, anyway.

Candy shakes her head feebly.

“Goodbye, Nathaniel.”

She doesn’t wait for a reply as she turns to leave and doesn’t look back.

Once far enough away, she tries to rub her face dry, but the tears won’t stop coming.

#Candy is a bit ooc cause she actually gives a crap about the breakup ya know? jdnfkjasdf #but yeahhhh #this is my first time posting my prose writing anywhere holy crappp #Eeeep I cant wait to see what they do with Nathaniel's route Im so curious! I hope they give him good character development #im also looking froward to Castiel's introduction sm!#ok shuttin up now #my candy love #mcl university life #my candy love university life #mcl #mcl ul #nathaniel mcl #my candy love nathaniel #my candy love fanfic #mcl ul fanfic #L writes

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